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In THis Issue September 2014 - Volume 2, Issue 9 1 Cover
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3 In this issue 6 in the news: national 8 in the news: interNational 9 Out on LI: Network News 12 Out Front: Dolly parton
8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23
15 Out and about: Book review 15 Out and about: Screen savor 16 out and about: Tyler glenn 19 Calendar 20 BE scene: Sage-LI Fire island invasion & LIGALY summer programming 22 living healthy: Back to school blues 24 living healthy: healthier travel 26 Travel: indianapolis
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27 recipes: lunchbox recipes 28 what's the t: Back to school on a budget 30 Finance: tips for every college student 32 living smart: Fall hairstyles
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Living Out is produced by The Long Island Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender Services Network
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Contributors Joey Amato, Chris Azzopardi, Christopher Biore, Chris McNamee, Mike Murphy, Rev. Irene Monroe, Jennifer Nyx, Brittany Perry, Rachel Roth, Gregg Shapiro, Gwen Smith
33 Points of view: transphobia at womens colleges 34 Points of view: unfit for print
livingout follow our lead
32 living smart: Emmys red carpet report card
apply to be a contributor Email editor@livingoutli.org! LIVING OUT
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In the news
national News
By Rachel Roth
marriage equality around the nation Utah, Oklahoma, Virginia: supreme court appeals pending More than 1,000 couples in Utah continue to wait in limbo for a decision regarding the state’s status on marriage equality. As Living Out previously reported, Utah’s state's same-sex marriage ban ruled unconstitutional in December and the couples rushed to get married. In May, a different federal judge ruled Utah must grant benefits—such as child custody—to those couples, but the decision was also put on hold. Last month, Utah Attorney General Sean Reyes (left) filed a petition with the U.S. Supreme Court asking justices to overturn lower-court rulings striking down the state's ban on same-sex
marriage. The petition, which was filed seven weeks before its Sept. 23 deadline, is the first marriage equality lawsuit to be filed with the court since it struck down part of the Defense of Marriage Act last year. An Oklahoma marriage equality case was also filed with the court as lawyers for Tulsa County clerk Sally Howe Smith asked the court to review a 10th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals ruling striking down that state's ban. Elsewhere, in Virginia, Attorney General Mark Herring formally filed a petition with the Supreme Court to hear a case challenging his state's marriage equality ban.
Colorado: One step closer to marriage equality Adams County District Court Judge C. Scott Crabtree struck down Colorado's marriage equality ban, determining that the ban violates the constitutional right of equal protection. Crabtree immediately stayed his ruling, meaning LGBT couples will still not be able to marry.
"The final chapter of this debate will undoubtedly have to be written either in Denver, Colorado or Washington, D.C.," Crabtree wrote in his ruling. "While the striking down of laws banning same-sex marriages has been progressing at a rapid rate, it will take time for this issue to be finally resolved."
Kentucky, Michigan, Ohio, tennessee: one decision A three-judge panel from the 6th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals heard arguments in six marriage equality cases out of Kentucky, Michigan, Ohio and Tennessee. The three-hour oral arguments marked the first time a single court heard challenges to marriage bans in four states in one day. The decision on the bans will likely come down to Judge Jeffrey Sutton (left), who was appointed to the bench by then-President George W. Bush, but there has been no indication of when a decision will be reached.
connecticut: retroactive rights
Connecticut's highest court ruled that some legal rights of same-sex predate the state’s 2008 adoption of marriage equality and earlier approval of civil unions. The decision, which is the first of its kind, overturned lower court rulings. The ruling also allows for a widow to sue a doctor for medical malpractice for the death of her wife. The alleged malpractice occurred before the state adopted marriage equality.
Florida: four county overturns stayed
indiana and kentucky: no and yes
Indiana will not recognize marriages of same-sex couples who wed following a judge's June 25 decision striking down the state's ban on marriage equality and before a stay was issued June 27, according to an announcement. A memo to state agencies from Mark Ahearn, chief counsel to Gov. Mike Pence (above), said Indiana's ban on marriage equality "is in full force and effect and executive branch agencies are to execute their functions as 6
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though the U.S. District Court order of June 25 had not been issued," The Indianapolis Star reported. Similarly a federal judge ruled that Kentucky's ban on marriage equality is unconstitutional, as it violates the right to equal protection. The judge also issued a stay of the ruling pending an appeal, which means that same-sex couples still cannot marry in the state.
After a Monroe County judge ruled in favor of same-sex marriage in the Florida Keys, subsequent decisions from judges in Miami-Dade County and Broward County soon followed. Each of these decisions has been stayed pending appeal. A fourth judge, Palm Beach County Circuit Judge Diana Lewis struck down the state's ban on marriage equality. The ruling was in response to a case involving the estate of Frank Bangor, a gay man who had left his Florida property to a man that he had legally married in Delaware.
>> READ MORE AT LIVINGOUTLI.ORG
lgbt organizations drop support for enda
The Employment Non-Discrimination Act (ENDA) lost the support of several major LGBT rights groups, including Lambda Legal, the Transgender Law Center, the American Civil Liberties Union, Gay & Lesbian Advocates & Defenders, and the National Center for Lesbian Rights. ENDA, which has grown into one of the LGBT community's top priorities, has faced criticism due to religious exemptions that could make the bill more likely to receive a vote in the Republican-controlled House of Representatives.
veteran sues idaho state over spouse’s burial rights
Madelynn Lee Taylor, a lesbian widow and 74-yearold military veteran, is suing the state of Idaho to grant her burial rights in a veterans’ cemetery where her late spouse’s ashes have already been laid to rest.
The Washington Blade reported that Taylor, who served in the Navy from 1958 to 1964, filed a lawsuit in July challenging Idaho state laws prohibiting her from being buried in the Idaho State Veterans Cemetery with her late wife, Jean Mixner.
obama signs order protecting mississippi enacts anti-lgbt lgbtq workers, no exemptions law for religious beliefs
California governor removes gender-specific terms
President Barack Obama signed executive orders prohibiting discrimination against gay and transgender workers in the federal government and its contracting agencies, without a new exemption that was requested by some religious organizations. Obama had been under pressure by 70 civil-rights groups, including the NAACP, to leave exemptions out of the order.
Calif. Gov. Jerry Brown on Monday signed a bill into law to replace the words "husband" or "wife" with "spouse" in the state's constitution. The elimination of the phrasing is said to represent the removal of a final barrier to marriage equality since the 2013 Supreme Court ruling that declared Proposition 8's marriage equality ban unconstitutional.
A law took effect in Mississippi last month that allows business owners to cite their religious beliefs in order to refuse services to LGBT people. Mississippi's Religious Freedom Restoration Act was passed in April and is facing challenges from several Mississippi cities, including Jackson and Hattiesburg by passing resolutions affirming all patrons are welcome. The Advocate also reported that Equality Mississippi is distributing stickers that proclaim, "We don't discriminate: If you're buying, we're selling."
celebrity News
andrew rannells takes over for NPH ‘True blood’ star anna paquin on bisexuality During a recent interview with long time t.v. host Larry King, Anna Paquin, star of the HBO show "True Blood," was questioned about her personal life. Paquin, 32, came out as bisexual in 2010 and is married to co-star Stephen Moyer. When asked by King if she was a "non-practicing bisexual" Paquin responded by saying, "well, I am married to my husband and we are happily, monogamously married." King pressed further asking if she "was bisexual" and her response couldn't have been more brilliant. "It's not a past tense thing," Paquin stated, "Are you still straight if you are with somebody, and – if you were to break up with them or if they were to die, it doesn't prevent your sexuality from existing, it doesn't really work like that."
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Andrew Rannells (far below) is no stranger to Broadway, he nabbed a Tony Award nomination for his role in "The Book of Mormon." The "Girls" star discussed his stint as an "East German transgender struggling rock star" in Hedwig and the Angry Inch. Rannells took over for Neil Patrick Harris (below) in the Tony-winning production on August 20th. This isn't the first time Rannells is playing Hedwig. He previously starred as the lead character in a 2002 production in Austin, Texas.
ariana grande: more than just cheating Ariana Grande gets it. Sometimes a guy leaves a girl for another girl, and sometimes he leaves her for another guy. The song "Break Your Heart Right Back" featuring Childish Gambino is about a boy that cheats on a girl with another boy. Appearing on her latest album My Everything, Grande says the song is one of her favorites because "it's really funny" and she told UK Metro she believes it has happened to her. Grande goes on to say that the song was orignially supposed to be about a boy who cheats with another girl, but then she said "no, I want it to be about a boy who cheats on a girl with another boy." Earlier in August, Grande made headlines by defending her gay brother, Frankie Grande, a house member on Big Brother, after an internet troll used a homophobic slur against him on Instagram. LIVING OUT
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In the news
by rachel roth
international News
UK Ballroom Dance Council Seeks to Ban gay couples from competition The British Dance Council is considering a proposal that would ban same-sex couples from mainstream competitions, instead creating same-sex-only categories, The Guardian reported. The proposed rule would recognize partnerships as "one man and one lady… unless otherwise stated." The council's president says that so far he's heard more support
for the change than opposition. If the proposal were enacted, it would prevent the current leaders in the over-35 prechampionship category, John Church and Alex Lewall, from defending the title.
Honduran glbt activists fight for their lives According the Washington Blade, anti-LGBT violence in the impoverished Central American country has skyrocketed since a coup toppled then-President Manuel Zelaya in June 2009. Nelson Arambú of the Diversity Movement in Resistance told the Blade that 176 GLBT Hondurans have been reported killed between the 2009 coup and May of this year.
Conversely, 20 GLBT Hondurans were reported murdered between 1994 and 2009. Arambú also said that at least three Honduran GLBT rights advocates have received death threats or have been threatened at gunpoint since 2011.
LGBTI Homeless shelter planned in poland
Poland’s LGBTI support group, Lambda Association, is seeking funding for a shelter for marginalized young LGBTI people under a European Economic Area and Norway Grants program which would house 250 at risk people and provide them with free meals, help finding work, and access to social workers, Gay Star News reported. The start up costs for the project is estimated to be €85,000, roughly $120,000. Lambda Association hopes that the shelter – which will be in Warsaw – will be largely funded grants from Norway, Iceland and Liechtenstein.
kids raised by same-sex couples happier, healthier A new study conducted by the University of Melbourne in Australia finds that children of same-sex parents enjoy better levels of physical health and wellbeing than their peers from traditional families. Described as the largest study of its kind in the world, researchers surveyed 315 same-sex parents and 500 children, and found that children of same-sex partnerships scored, on average, 6 percent better children from traditional families on health categories like “emotional behavior and family cohesion.”
american quakers offer safe passage for Glbt ugandans A group of American Quakers is offering a way out for desperate Ugandans fleeing the country’s new Anti-Homosexuality Act. The Olympia, Washington-based group calls its project the Friends New Underground Railroad (FNUR) because it follows in the footsteps of the Quakers who helped bring slaves out of the American South, Buzzfeed reported. The group works with about 10 Ugandan “conductors” while reporting that they have funded passage out
of the country for 107 people with grants in the range of $52 to $185. The refugees travel in small groups using back roads to make their way to safe houses in neighboring GLBT-friendly countries. FNUR says at least 12 people have continued on to other countries like South Africa and Sweden with unconfirmed reports that about 30 have reached Europe.
Know Your Status for you and your partners Free HIV and STD/STI Testing Available during drop-in hours and by appointment at all locations of The Long Island GLBT Community Center.
Drop-In Hours The Center at Woodbury 20 Crossways Park Dr. N., Suite 110 Woodbury Every Thursday, 5-8pm
The Center at Bay Shore 34 Park Avenue, Bay Shore Every Wednesday, 5-8pm
The Hamptons GLBT Center 44 Union Street, Sag Harbor First Friday of the month, 4-8pm
Free, quick, and confidential testing for HIV, syphilis, chlamydia, and gonorrhea. For more information or to schedule an appointment, contact the HIV/STD Outreach and Testing Program at testing@liglbtnetwork.org or 631.665.2300 Nassau: Center at Woodbury 20 Crossways Park Dr. N., Suite 110 Woodbury, NY 11797 T 516.323.0011 F 516.750.4715
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Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore 34 Park Avenue Bay Shore, NY 11706 T 631.665.2300 F 631.665.7874
East End: The Hamptons GLBT Center 44 Union Street Sag Harbor, NY 11963 T 631.899.4950 F 631.665.7874
>> READ MORE AT LIVINGOUTLI.ORG
BACK TO SCHOOL:
out on li
LIGALY GEARS UP TO FIGHT ANTI-GLBT BULLYING Bullying of gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender (GLBT) youth in our schools is still an issue: 4 out of 5 GLBT youth report being verbally harassed daily in school, and nearly 65% feel unsafe in their school environment. GLBT youth have the right to go to school without being bullied or harassed, and they should not have to feel unsafe either.
Studies have shown that bullying not only effects the shortterm, but it has long-term effects as well. GLBT students who are victims of bullying and harassment are shown to have higher rates of depression than their peers and are more likely to skip class or dropout of school altogether. They are also much more likely to drink, smoke, or use other drugs as a coping mechanism for the pain they experience. GLBT students are also more likely to commit suicide than other youth because they see it as their only way to end the bullying and harassment.
While bullying and harassment of GLBT students is a terrible occurance, there is a solution to these problems. Long Island Gay and Lesbian Youth (LIGALY) has been combatting the bullying of GLBT youth in
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harassment. Their Back to School Campaign seeks to raise funds to help support these antibullying workshops and trainings throughout the school year. For the 2013-2014 school year, LIGALY was able to deliver over 300 anti-bullying workshops to 5,000 students, train 1,000 teachers and school staff to prevent bullying, and conduct leadership trainings for 1,500 youth leaders from 50 Gay Straight Alliance (GSA) clubs.
schools since 1993. In partnering with over 100 school districts, LIGALY's Safe Schools Initiative is able to deliver education, prevention, and outreach programs that help to create safer schools. LIGALY will be continuing its phenominal work for the 2014-2015 school year to put an end to the bullying and harassment of GLBT youth in Long Island schools. Last year, LIGALY delivered over 300 "LIGALY 101" anti-bullying workshops in schools all across Long Island. LIGALY also trains teachers and other staff in schools so that they are prepared to address and prevent bullying as it takes place. Each year, LIGALY asks the community for support in putting an end to bullying and
LIGALY also implements an Annual National Coming Out Day Awareness Campaign (see page 10 for more information) in 60 Long Island schools that engaged over 60,000 students and educators to take a stand against bullying and run a weekly youth leadership program – Safe Schools Team – that builds youth leadership and helps youth to organize in their school communities to stop bullying.
TO HELP PUT AN END TO BULLYING AND HARASSMENT OF GLBT STUDENTS VISIT LIGLBTNETWORK.ORG/BACKTOSCHOOL FOR MORE INFORMATION OR TO MAKE A DONATION
STARTING SCHOOL? MAKE SURE YOUR INSURANCE HAS YOU COVERED
PROJECT HELM Healcare Enrollment for the LGBT Market When you move to another state, or even to a different part of New York, your current health insurance coverage might not cover the doctors and health clinics in your new location! If your school does not provide you with a health insurance plan, you'll want to check your options. Project Helm (Health Enrollment for the LGBT Marketplace) can help you get coverage, no matter where in the state – or country – you are moving to. You don't need to wait until the next open enrollment period!
Project Helm can get your insurance changed TODAY! Learn More To learn more or to set up a one-on-one appointment, contact The Long Island GLBT Network at 631.665.2300 or email enroll@liglbtnetwork.org
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MARK YOUR CALENDARS: HEALTH INSURANCE OPEN ENROLLEMENT • 2015 open enrollment runs from November 15, 2014 - February 15, 2015 • If you received a letter about rising premium costs, that is for your plan beginning in 2015: • You can enroll in a different plan for 2015, with more affordable rates • You can contact NYS of Health to appeal the rate increase, the insurance company must have their rate increases approved. • Tax credits are available for those who's individual or family income falls between 138% and 400% of the federal poverty On Mon., November 17th level. Project Helm will resume • The Medicaid income level for NYS remains drop-in hours for health at 138% of the federal poverty level, 2015 insurance open enrollment. poverty levels will be released in early 2015. Drop in hours are: Medicaid enrollment is available all year Wednesdays from 5-8 at round. The Center at Bay Shore • The penalty for not having insurance in Thursdays from 5-8 at 2015 raises to 2% of your income, per The Center at Woodbury person in your household or $325, per person in your household whichever Appoinments for enrollment can calculation is higher. be made if you can't make dropin hours, for more information • This is due when you file your taxes please call 631.665.2300. in April. LIVING OUT
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ligaly youth and volunteers cut and fold ribbons all summer (below) in preparation for the campaign. The ribbons, along with palm cards and posters are sent to schools across LI.
show your support
National Coming Out Day: Oct. 11 Every year, Long Island GLBT students and their allies don rainbow ribbons and ally stickers to participate in Long Island Gay and Lesbian Youth’s (LIGALY) National Coming Out Day (NCOD) School Awareness Campaign. This year’s campaign marks the 12th Annual NCOD Campaign that LIGALY has been organizing since 2002.
Over 60,000 students participated in last year’s NCOD with a new sense of empowerment due to the striking down of the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA). LIGALY believes that the NCOD campaign appeals to all people, whether they identify as GLBT or as an ally – or even those that have never considered speaking up before. Those who have never considered being
National Coming Out Day is a day for youth to know it is safe to express who they are or what they support. Since 1993, LIGALY’s Safe Schools Initiative has worked with more than 100 of Long Island’s 127 public school districts to develop a school culture that fosters support, understanding, and respect for GLBT youth, families, and educators.
an ally are finally gaining the awareness that they needed in order to “come out” and support a cause they were once afraid of backing. “LIGALY’s National Coming Out Day Campaign allows youth to have the opportunity to 'come out' in any way to help make schools safer for GLBT youth and their allies,” says Irene Tsikitas, Regional Director for LIGALY, “having a specific day where the youth know it is safe to express who they are or what they supports means a lot to youth everywhere – regardless of whether or not they choose to actually ‘come out’ on NCOD.”
LIGALY’S NCOD Campaign calls on the entire school community to “come out” as advocates of safer schools and to help reduce levels of GLBT-related harassment and bullying. The NCOD Campaign encourages participants to make a statement and show their support of GLBT students by wearing a rainbow ribbon pin or ally sticker. LIGALY provides free campaign kits to participating schools that include the rainbow pins and stickers, as well as campaign posters, palm cards and a resource guide to assist students in implementing the campaign. Every year, the materials for the campaign are developed and created by LIGALY’s Safe Schools Team, a group of student leaders who are provided with specialized
education and training to address antiGLBT bullying in schools. LIGALY also provides free on-site training for student organizations that want to host the campaign. This year, the LIGALY Advisory board (LAB), a youth leadership group that meets every Monday from 5pm-7pm at the GLBT Center at Bay Shore, is having a special themed "OUTlet" in celebration of NCOD. "National Coming OUTlet” will take place on October 10th from 8pm-12am. This OUTlet invites youth to socialize with other youth who also participated in NCOD at their schools and to engage in several activities, including a safe space to tell their coming out stories if they wish to do so.
2nd largest glbt event of the year...
long island glbt expo!
Date: Sunday, Nov. 9 When: 12 p.m. to 5 p.m. Where: Hilton Long Island, Melville/Rte. 110 What: Over 100 booths of GLBT-friendly businesses! 10
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The Long Island GLBT Expo returns for its 6th year on Sunday, November 9 from 12 p.m. to 5 p.m. at the Hilton Long Island in Melville. The event gives attendees the opportunity to interact with
over 100 booths featuring a wide variety of businesses, services, and community groups, while enjoying live entertainment, free giveaways, and informational workshops.
Last year, over 3,500 GLBT and allied Long Islanders came to the Expo to connect with affirming businesses and services, and this year an estimated 5,000 are expected to attend.
Businesses who are looking to participate or sponsor the event are encouraged to contact 516.323.0011 or learn more online at www.liglbtnetwork.org.
>> READ MORE AT LIVINGOUTLI.ORG
out on li (FAR LEFT) A mural in the hamptons glbt center painted by east end glbt youth and allies, (LEFT) East end youth take a field trip with ligaly to spirit's promise horse rescue sanctuary in riverhead during spring break
The Hamptons GLBT Center 44 Union Street Sag Harbor, NY 11963 tel 631.899.4950 fax 631.665.7874 web liglbtnetwork.org
The Hamptons GLBT Center celebrates one year anniversary! After months of planning and fundraising, The Long Island GLBT Network opened its doors to The Hamptons GLTBT Center in Sag Harbor on August 10, 2013. The East End community celebrated the grand opening with Edie Windsor, victor in the landmark case overturning the Defense of Marriage Act, and welcomed over 500 guests to share her excitement in the Center’s creation. Housed within the well-known historic Old Whaler's Church, the Hamptons GLBT
>> READ MORE AT LIVINGOUTLI.ORG
Center has become a beacon of light and home and safe space for the GLBT community of the East End – especially for youth. Having a community center that serves the GLBT youth and adults of the East End was always a goal for the Network, but it was the suicide of 16-year-old David Hernandez Barros that accelerated their efforts. During the past 12 months, The Network and its organizations have been able to expand operating hours to five days
a week, establish programs for youth through daily drop-in and Youth Groups, create special spring break and summer vacation programs for youth, provide HIV and STD testing and counseling services, establish groups for Spanish speaking GLBT people, establish groups for the transgender community, and expand partnerships with East End schools and conduct anti-bullying presentations in addition to help create more gay-straight alliance clubs.
All of these accomplishments were made possible with the generosity of The Calamus Foundation and the Jenjo Foundation in addition to the help and support from The Hamptons GLBT Center Advisory Committee. The Network looks to continue expanding its programs and services for the East End GLBT community to make sure situations such as David Hernandez Barros' never happen again.
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out Front
Gee Golly, It's Dolly Legend talks boobs, drag and christianity An Interview By Chris Azzopardi Photos Courtesy of Dolly Records
When Dolly Parton calls you, greeting you by name with her unmistakable Tennessee twang, it’s a good idea to immediately establish that the lady on the line is the actual legend herself. “Am I talking to the real Dolly or is this an impersonator?” I ask, just to be sure. Proving she’s as sharp as the icon she’s become over the last six decades – easily the most honored female country music artist of all time, inspiring drag queens galore – Parton is quick with her comeback: “Oh, there’s no such thing as a real Dolly. I’m as real as you’re gonna get!” Very real, as it turns out. Currently promoting her 42nd studio album, Blue Smoke, Parton talked about the country music community evolving beyond labeling gay people “perverse,” addressed rumors of her recent lesbian wedding and dished tit tips to drag queens (more stuffing, girls).
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>> READ MORE AT LIVINGOUTLI.ORG
out Front Outside of the rhinestones and big platinum hair, why do gay people identify and empathize with you? Did you say empathize or sympathize? (Laughs) I think there’s some of both! Actually, I’ve been around so long people just kind of feel like they know me. They’ve seen me enough. I’m more like a favorite aunt or an older sister or somethin’, so I just think people know so much about me they just feel like I’m part of them. I hope that’s what they think. That’s what it seems like! I see you as our fairy godmother. (Laughs) Yeah, I do look like the fairy godmother! You’ve acknowledged that you felt like an outsider since you were a kid. “Coat of Many Colors” really is about
It’s more than just you being nonjudgmental. You said growing up you felt different, something many gay people can empathize with. Do you sense that relationship? Yes, I do. I’ve always felt that. I’ve always felt that’s one of the things that’s drawn my gay fans to me. They do know that I do feel different, and all of my life I will be different. I always have been. But I enjoy and appreciate and respect that difference in myself just like I do in other people. God made me the way that I am and it’s my business to be true to that. If everyone was free of judgment like you are, what might the world be like? It’d be a lot better, I can tell you that. But people love to hate, and it’s just unfortunate but that’s the way it is. People like to judge, they like to condemn, they won’t accept anything they don’t understand – that’s just too bad. We have to work at those things anyway, but most people are not willing to. A lot of people are just blind and they’re not seeing through the spiritual eye, and we need to look that way and then we would be more forgiving, more loving and more accepting. You were one of the first major country artists to advocate for gay rights. Why did you decide to take that step and stand up for LGBT equality?
feeling different. What role has that feeling of being an outsider played in the relationship that you have with the gay community? Well, I do believe that I have a lot of gay fans because I think they do accept me as I am – the differences in me – and I think they know that I see that and love that in everybody else. I am not a judgmental person. I’m a very loving and accepting person. I try to see the good in everybody, and I don’t care who people are as long as they’re themselves, whatever that is. That old saying “to thine own self be true” – no truer words were ever spoken, and I’m just honored and proud to be accepted.
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Why wouldn’t I stand up for everybody, for all people? In the country field, we’re brought up in spiritual homes, we’re taught to “judge not lest you be judged,” and it’s always been a mystery to me how people jump all over things just to criticize, condemn and judge other people when that is so un-Christian – and they claim to be good Christians! We’re supposed to love one another. We’re supposed to accept and love one another. Whether we do or not, that’s a different story. But that’s what we are supposed to do. What are your thoughts on the progress the country music community has been making as a whole when it comes to embracing its gay listeners? In defense of a lot of people, they didn’t have as true of an understanding as they do now. Now
people really see that this is real, these are real people with real feelings, that this is who they really are. I think a lot of people, anytime you talked about gay people, thought “perverse.” Now, they’re being more educated that this is who people really are. There’s just been so much made of (gay rights) in the last two or three years, and it’s been brought to the front so people can really see it and be like, “Yeah, I guess there are a lot more gay people than we ever knew! I have a better understanding of it now. I know that these people are for real.” I think they’re getting that now. I think it was just a lack of knowledge. And when you’re with someone, of course you should have your rights. You’re gonna be with who you’re gonna be with even if you starve to death and have no privileges and no rights. I think people understand that more now. You’ve been such a wonderful ally to us...so much so that people have actually mistaken you as a lesbian yourself. (Laughs) Well, you know what, it’s true. In fact, there was some story recently (in the National Enquirer) where I was supposedly marrying my longtime friend Judy (Ogle) and that my husband was OK with it! I thought, “Where did they come up with all this?” I am not gay, but if I were I would be the first one running out of the closet. And right into Judy’s arms? Yeah, who knows! I might’ve said, “Judy, you wanna get something going with me?” (Laughs) But our friendship is just a precious friendship. What do you say to “From Here to the Moon and Back,” your love duet with Willie Nelson on Blue Smoke, being used for the first dance at a gay wedding? I would be honored. That would be a beautiful wedding song, “From Here to the Moon and Back” – wow! People often use “I Will Always Love You” – I wrote “I Will Always Love You” as a wedding song too – and it really kind of speaks to that, but yeah, “From Here to the Moon and Back” would be a beautiful wedding song. If you get married, you can play it! What is something about your life that people would be most surprised by? I can’t imagine a thing that people don’t already know about me. I think people would be surprised at how really at-home I am. I look like a party doll
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out front but I’m very home-lovin’. I’m a homebody, and I’m family-oriented. I don’t get out much unless it’s a special occasion. So I guess people might be surprised at just how calm I really am.
Some of them are really good! Some of them are …comical.
When you look at yourself in the mirror, what do you see? I see ways to improve myself. I’ve never been a true beauty and I’m always thinking, “I need to do this, or I could look better than that,” but I guess we all have that. You’ve said that drag queens do you better than you. Have you learned anything about yourself from watching people impersonate you? Most of the drag queens are about six feet tall already ... and then they put on those high heels! I ain’t big as a minute, so I always think, what I’ve learned about myself is, I’m not tall. I’m definitely even shorter than I knew I was! But actually, I am very honored when the drag queens all do their thing because I think it’s a big compliment. I get a big kick out of some of them.
Some of them are so good you once lost a look-alike contest that you were in. (Laughs) I entered one of the Dolly look-alike contests down on Santa Monica at one of the gay clubs down there – I lived right up the street – so I just kind of over exaggerated myself and went and joined the party and walked across the stage. I got less applause than anybody. It’s pretty bad when I lose a Dolly Parton look-alike contest! If you were a drag queen, what would be your drag name? P. Titty … like P. Diddy! What tips do you have for drag queens who want to get your bust size just right? Oh heavens ... I’m so little is why my boobs look so big. But (drag queens) are already big! They’re gonna need to really do some paddin’! I’m larger than life, so just get them boobs the way that they fit into proportion to your body. Put it out there, whatever your imagination is of me.
Chris Azzopardi is the editor of Q Syndicate, the international LGBT wire service. Reach him via his website at www.chris-azzopardi.com
DOLLY DISCOGRAPHY
From left to Right: Row 1: Hello, I'm Dolly; Just Because I'm a Woman; In the Good Old Days (When Times Were Bad); My Blue Ridge Mountain Boy; The Fairest of Them All; Golden Streets of Glory; Joshua Row 2: Coat of Many Colors; Touch Your Woman; My Favorite Songwriter: Porter Wagoner; My Tennessee Mountain Home; Bubbling Over; Jolene; Love Is Like a Butterfly Row 3: The Bargain Store; Dolly: The Seeker/We Used To ; All I Can Do ; New Harvest...First Gathering ; Here You Come Again ; Heartbreaker; Great Balls of Fire Row 4: Dolly, Dolly Dolly; 9 to 5 and Odd Jobs; Heartbreak Express; Burlap & Satin; The Great Pretender; Real Love; Rainbow Row 5: White Limozeen; Eagle When She Flies; Slow Dancing with the Moon; Something Special; Treasures; Hungry Again; The Grass Is Blue Row 6: Little Sparrow; Halos & Horns; For God and Country; Those Were the Days; Backwoods Barbie; Better Day; Blue Smoke
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out and about book review
by christopher biore
Liberty Avenue: Chicago Stories Greg Shapiro is a prolific gay writer of the Midwest, with pieces spanning from poetry and fiction to entertainment news. A Chicago native, the city is particularly fond of him, a superstar in the local LGBT literary community. Many of his theater reviews and celebrity interviews – all with an LGBT slant – can be found among the regional papers and magazines of the Windy City. With Liberty Avenue: Chicago Stories, Shapiro pays tribute to his hometown in twelve short stories; capturing the city in the 70s and 80s world he grew up in. Often funny and always intimate, Shapiro’s stories tap into the charged atmosphere found in the one-on-one encounter. Whether between family members, strangers, or exes, most of the stories take place in the space between the driver and passenger’s seats (with plenty of cars to
screen savor
accommodate). The unconnected stories use this space to provide a spectrum for the young, Midwestern gay man, while maintaining the core sense of Chicago life throughout. The first and last stories, “Your Father’s Car” and “Your Mother’s Car,” reveal how smoothly Shapiro handles these similarities and differences in such a limited space. “Lunch with a Porn Star” and “Marilyn, My Mother, Myself” were two favorites I’d recommend for their attention to starting and well-worn relationships. The chance encounter with a famous porn star and the material fixation of an overly supportive mother make for truly entertaining reads. The relatively simple moments have the light-hearted power that nostalgia brings when we look back on our younger days,
Not every story was a hit. Just as the best stories are the ones that bring the characters close, when they are kept at a distance, like during the phone conversation in “Threes,” the reader’s kept on the surface of the story. Also, a story or two tries to bring in a larger cast in all at once, and ends up dragging down the pace. “The Breakdown Lane” struggles with this while “The Tracks” gives the reader enough time to get to know everyone involved. The emphasis here is on the life of Chicago, so those familiar with the setting may get more out of the selection. But even those unfamiliar with the time and place will find common ground with these stories. The slice-of-life scenarios and pop-culture
by gregg shapiro
Road Trips Construction director Ivan Locke (Tom Hardy) is in the process of resolving as many problems as he’s creating in the one-man show Locke (IM Global). On the eve of the biggest concrete pour ever in Europe, Locke is in his BMW SUV, driving two hours to London, to be with Bethan (voiced by Olivia Colman), who became pregnant with his baby after a one-night fling.
The fact that it was the only time that he ever strayed in his 15-year marriage to Katrina (voiced by Ruth Wilson) makes no difference to his wife. Through a series of car-phone calls, we get to know these two women almost as well as Ivan knows them. For example, when Bethan asks Ivan if he hates her for going through with pregnancy, he tells her he doesn’t really know her well enough to have those kinds of feelings. It’s perfectly clear how much Ivan loves Katrina (and his
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Horton Foote’s The Trip to Bountiful (Lifetime/Lionsgate) has a lengthy history, especially as a showcase for actresses. Originally presented more than 60 years ago as an NBC teleplay, Foote’s piece was made into an Oscar-winning 1985 film. It also had a couple of Broadway productions, most recently in 2013 with Cicely Tyson and Vanessa Williams.
two sons, Sean and Eddie) through their phone conversations and the tears he sheds. Ivan also converses with others. There’s his boss, Gareth (Ben Daniels), who may not be able to save his job. He also carries on an imaginary conversation with his father, a man he despises and one he doesn’t want to be anything like. But it is Ivan’s calls with Donal (Andrew Scott), his right hand man at the construction site, which provide the necessary tension-breaking humor and offer more insight into Ivan. Locke is especially notable for giving viewers another side of Hardy to admire. Bearded, beaten down by life and a head cold, Hardy's Locke is the only face we see on-screen for 85 minutes. It’s to Hardy’s credit that we never look away.
Tyson and Williams reprise their roles, as Carrie and her daughterin-law Jessie Mae, respectively, in the latest film adaptation. Independent and elderly Carrie, forced to live with bossy and nervous Jessie Mae and Carrie’s over-worked and henpecked son
references show the angle on everyday life that any New Yorker can relate to. And it’s a welcome indication that there was a gay life to be had outside the areas of New York and California. Check out Greg Shapiro when he stops by the Long Island GLBT Network’s Center in Woodbury for an author reading on Tuesday, September 23rd at 7pm. For more details visit www.liglbtnetwork.org.
Ludie (Blair Underwood), wants nothing more than to make a (final?) trip to Bountiful, her hometown. Determined to get there by any means necessary (including hiding her pension check), Carrie packs a suitcase, sneaks out of the house in Houston and heads to the bus station in order to make her trip a reality. At the bus station, after a close call running into Ludie and Jessie Mae, Carrie meets Thelma (Keke Palmer), who becomes her seat-mate for the first leg of the excursion. Along the way, Carrie regales Thelma with stories of the Bountiful she remembers and offers advice. However, not too far along the way, Carrie gets some bad news, and finds herself stranded at a bus station where she sings hymns, has some laughs and sheds some tears, before completing her journey. Originally a Lifetime cable presentation, the 1950s-set The Trip to Bountiful, includes the commercial pauses. Tyson’s performance is what we have come to expect from her and Williams adds a level of camp to the production.
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out and about
i-music
Neon Trees gay front man Tyler Glenn is a nice guy. Funny, smart and thoughtful, he’s the kind of artist who makes the interview process an enjoyable one. So it’s not all that surprising that Tyler’s band also comes off as funny, smart and thoughtful, especially on its latest release, Pop Psychology (Mercury). A more personal effort than the quartet’s previous releases, many of the songs involve serious subject matter. But instead of getting bogged down, the music, which is buoyant and brilliant dance-pop, elevates the songs and the mood, sort of like a musical antidepressant. 16
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Tyler, for the few uninitiated, I’d like to begin by asking you to say something about the genesis of the name of the band. I was with friends in high school and we would hang at a burger establishment called In-NOut in California. It was one of the older, more original ones. They had these palm tree lights. We thought Neon Palm Trees sounded like a cool band name. I always kept it in the back of my mind [laughs]. Unfortunately, we are kind of tied to fast food [laughs].
Were other names in contention? There was always a list of names that my guitar player and I had. But a lot of the names were either too dark or serious for the type of music that we wanted to make or a lot of them were (the names of) smaller bands that I thought no one knew. I don’t know what I was thinking. “No one knows this band, so we’ll have this name.” It was very immature of me. I don’t think there were any viable options, really.
Neon has been a popular component of bands’ names in the early part of the 21st century, with Neon Trees, Neon Indian, Neon Hitch and Neon Neon as examples. Why do you think that is? Yeah! I don’t know. That was definitely a concern. We had had our name for a long time. We had been a band before we put out our first record for quite a while. When we put out our first record in 2010, that’s when Neon
Indian put their record out, and then Neon Hitch. We found out that that is actually Neon Hitch’s name. Her parents gave it to her. She couldn’t go changing her name [laughs] and we couldn’t fault her for that. I don’t know the answer; maybe the connotation with new wave music or something.
I’m so glad you mentioned new wave music because on Habits, Neon Trees’ full-length major-label debut, there is a song titled “1983” which is followed by the song “Girls and Boys In School,” which recalls New Order in 1983. Can you please say something about the both the musical significance of the year 1983 and the band New Order for Neon Trees? The song 1983 is about the year I was born, but it’s not really about the year. The song’s more about maintaining that level of innocence before love gets tainted, for me anyway. I think the song definitely took a more literal approach in the music video. I think listeners looked at us and thought, “Oh, they love the `80s” [laughs]. But I think the song was more a nostalgic thing for me, in terms of innocence and youth. New Order has always been a massive influence on the band. I love their hybrid of electronic music and the roots of it and how it started as a band back with Joy Division, when it was more guitar-based; I thought they did that really well. And Peter Hook’s bass playing is timeless. I’ve always been highly influenced by that band, for sure.
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out and about Back in 1983, radio and MTV were the main places to hear cool music, such as New Order. Now bands have to find other ways to get exposure, including having their music used in advertisements. Neon Trees were fortunate enough to have a song, “Everybody Talks,” from the Picture Show disc, featured in a Buick commercial. What did that experience mean to you? I loved that they put us in it, so it felt like we were being used as more than just a song over a bunch of shiny cars. I think there was a quirkiness to it that was very much us. I was happy with the finished commercial. To this day, (some) people recall it as a Neon Trees commercial. It was crucial in propelling the song from just a modest radio hit to one of the bigger songs of that year. I loved how it worked. It doesn’t always happen that way when you license your music. It was a cool opportunity.
Three albums in four years would be considered prolific in anybody’s book. Is that kind of productivity part of Neon Trees’ long-term plans? Yes. I think we get bored if we’re not putting out new stuff. We’ve always been into the old model of bands putting out (records yearly). If we could, I would love to put a record out every year. I also feel like – I don’t know if it’s
everyone’s label – but our label puts a lot into the first song and they put a lot into the record release, but they don’t do much past that. If we have to write a new record every time to get attention from our label [laughs], I’m okay with that. I’ll continue to write records.
The songs on the newest record, Pop Psychology, are as colorful as the artwork for the album. Please say something about that sonic shift. I set out to make a really dark record. When I started writing the third album I was talking to my therapist a lot. I still do. But I was just talking to her and getting through some stuff. What I was writing lent itself to that sort of theme. By the time it came to hunker down and make a focused body of work, I was in a really happy place. I didn’t want (the record) to reflect where I’d been, but where I was at the current time. I was interested in writing something colorful and anthemic and celebratory. The themes – it talks about identity and the troubles of finding love with technology – that I set out are still there, but I think it reflects a more colorful view on love. I also love the Pop Psychology name. I thought it was a great name for a record and it fits everything about it.
Tyler, it’s been a few months since you came out publicly. How has the reaction been so far? It’s been way more interesting than I expected. I didn’t think it would still be something I would be talking about, but I’m happy to because I think people are intrigued with my point of view revolving around my faith as well. I’m happy that I’ve been able to do it in a really honest way. The reaction has been really nice. The worst things I heard were maybe from gay atheists [laughs], because they were okay and excited about me coming out, but they were mad at me that I’m still religious.
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The closest thing LGBT folks had to a gay music festival was Cyndi Lauper’s True Colors Tour, which is now an annual event held only in New York. If Cyndi asked Neon Trees to perform as part of the benefit concert would the band be up for that? Yes, we have been asked to do the Christmas show. We’ve been asked a few times, but our schedules never line up. It sucks. But, absolutely, I love her!
Speaking of music fests and live performance, what can fans expect from a Neon Trees show? We are very much like a rock band when we play live. But I think that as much as we are a band playing our music, we put as much theatricality that we can in the show. The Pop Psychology tour and production that we’ve been doing is really fun and colorful, as you’d expect from looking at that album cover and listening to the album. I never stand still. I love to entertain. Even if you’re not familiar with all of our music, it’s an entertaining show. LIVING OUT
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show your pride
calendar of events Volunteer Orientation Tuesday, September 9th, 6:00 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore Monday, September 15th, 6:00 p.m. Nassau: Center at Woodbury, 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury www.liglbtcenter.org, 631.665.2300
SAGE-LI Nassau County Mingle: Eisenhower Park Tuesday, Sep. 16th, 11 a.m. Eisenhower Park Parking Field 3 Join us while we enjoy the nice weather while it lasts. We will be having our Nassau County Mingle at Eisenhower Park at Parking Field #3 on September 16th! The address of the park is 1899 Hempstead Tpke in East Meadow. In the event it rains, the Mingle will be held at the Woodbury Center. Please contact Alyssa Cottone one day prior to the program to confirm location. www.liglbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
SAGE-LI AARP Defensive Driving Course Saturday, Sep. 20th, 9:30 a.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore By taking the driver safety course you will l earn the current rules of the road, defensive driving techniques, and how to operate your vehicle more safely in today's increasingly challenging driving environment. The course is six hours and costs $15 for AARP members/$25 for non-members. RSVP required by Wednesday, September 17th. www.liglbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
Have an event you want listed here?
SAGE-LI Health Series: Guided Meditation Monday, Sep. 22nd, 1-2 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore Tuesday, Sep. 30th, 1-2 p.m. Nassau: Center at Woodbury, 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury
Latino Group 2nd & 4th Thursdays, 6-8 p.m. East End: The Hamptons GLBT Center, 44 Union St., Sag Harbor
Nassau County Mingle Tuesdays, 11 a.m.-1 p.m. Nassau: Center at Woodbury, 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury
The Latino Group provides support services to Long Island's GLBT and allied Latino's of all ages. The group seeks to create an energetic and diverse SAGE-LI Program Coordinator, Alyssa Join us for this month’s discussion as well understanding of issues affecting the Cottone, will be leading a guided as bringing your ideas for future books to Latino community directly with an effort meditation that focuses on breathing, share with the group. to create a supportive network of friends. heartbeat, and muscle relaxation. Join us www.liglbtnetwork.org, 516.323.0011 www.liglbtnetwork.org, 631.899.4950 on Monday, September 22nd or Tuesday, September 30th. 20 Something LIFE in Nassau www.liglbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300 2nd & 4th Fridays, 7:30-9 p.m 2nd Thursday, 7-9 p.m.
SAGE-LI’s weekly social for GLBT seniors 50+ at The Center at Garden City. The mingle will take place in Eisenhower Park at Parking Field #3 on September 16th. www.liglbtnetwork.org, 516.323.0011
Author Reading: Gregg Shapiro Tuesday, Sep. 23rd, 7 p.m. Nassau: Center at Woodbury, 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury Well known GLBT author Gregg Shapiro discusses his latest book, "Lincoln Avenue: Chicago Stories," comprised of twelve short stories. The book reflects on growing up gay in Chicago druing the 1970s and 1980s. Books will be available for purchase. www.liglbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
SAGE-LI OUTdoors Trip: Historical Hudson Valley SAGE-LI Restaurant OUTing: Sunset Cove Saturday, Sep. 27th, 10 a.m. 381 N Broadway, Sleepy Hollow, NY 10591 Join us for a day in Historical Hudson Valley and lunch on The Hudson River. Our itinerary includes tours of The Philipsburg Manor, Washington Irving's Sunnyside, The Sleepy Hollow Cemetery and lunch at Sunset Cove overlooking the Tappanzee Bridge. Each tour costs $10 ($30 total) - lunch not included in this price. First tour begins at 10am at The Philipsburg Manor (381 N. Broadway, Sleepy Hollow). Van transportation is available (but limited) on a first come, first serve basis. The van will pick up from Bay Shore at 7:30am and Woodbury at 8am. RSVP with payment required by Monday, September 15th. www.liglbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
Long Island Gay PTSA Meeting Monday, Sep. 29th, 7-8 p.m. Nassau: Center at Woodbury, 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury Join the only chartered PTA of its kind in the nation, and help us advocate for GLBT students in order to create safer, more affirming schools. www.liglbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
Senior Focus Group Monday, Sep. 29th,1 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore Come join our coed, peer-led, issuefocused discussion group. www.liglbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
E-mail: editor@ livingoutli.org
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Book Club Tuesday, Sep. 30th, 7 p.m. Nassau: Center at Woodbury, 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury Friday, Sep. 26th, 6 p.m. East End: The Hamptons GLBT Center, 44 Union St., Sag Harbor
Nassau: Center at Woodbury, 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury
Nassau: Center at Woodbury, 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury
Discussion and support group for GLBT people in their 20’s. A safe and affirming space to share their experiences. www.liglbtnetwork.org, 516.323.0011
LIFE in Nassau meets every second Thursday. Open to adults of all genders and orientations with an interest in BDSM topics.
Advisory Board (SAGE-LI) Monday, Sep. 8th 1-2 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore
LIGALY Advisory Board Mondays, 6-8 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore
We want to hear your voice! This group Youth help plan new programs and provides feedback on current SAGE-LI events at LIGALY. programming, offers ideas for additional www.liglbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300 programming, and helps plan future events. All are welcome! LIPSA Tuesday Night Tease www.liglbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300 Bowling League
Alcoholics Anonymous Tuesdays, 8-9 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore Closed group for all ages. www.liglbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
Brother2Brother 2nd & 4th Fridays, 7-8 p.m. Nassau: Center at Woodbury, 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury Social and discussion group for gay and bisexual men of color age 21+. www.liglbtnetwork.org, 516.323.0011
Drop-In HIV/STD Testing: Thursdays, 5-8 p.m. Nassau: Center at Woodbury, 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury Wednesdays, 5-8 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore 1st Friday, 4-8 p.m. East End: The Hamptons GLBT Center, 44 Union St., Sag Harbor Free and confidential testing for HIV, Syphilis, Gonorrhea and Chlamydia. www.liglbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
Friday night social program for GLBT youth and their friends ages 13-21. $2 admission, transportation available. www.liglbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
Parents Open House 2nd & 4th Tuesdays, 6-7 p.m. East End: The Hamptons GLBT Center, 44 Union St., Sag Harbor Open to parents & guardians og GLBT children. Come and see what programs our Center has to offer, meet the staff, take a tour, and we will answer any questions you may have. www.liglbtnetwork.org, 631.899.4950
Tuesdays, 7:30 p.m. Bowl Long Island, 138 West Rd., Patchogue
Parent Support Group 1st & 3rd Thursdays, 6-7 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore
Friendliest co-ed/mixed LGBT Bowling League. LIPSAbowling@optonline.net, 516.375.9473
Discussion group for parents of GLBT children. www.liglbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
LITE Social and Discussion Group 1st & 3rd Mondays, 7-8 p.m. Nassau: Center at Woodbury, 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury Wednesdays, 7:30-9 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore 1st & 3rd Thursdays, 6:30-8 p.m. East End: The Hamptons GLBT Center, 44 Union St., Sag Harbor
PEP Teams – Suffolk Thursdays, 6-8 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore
An open discussion group for transgender people and their friends and family. www.liglbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
Living PositHIVly 1st & 3rdThursdays, 7-8:30 p.m. Nassau: Center at Woodbury, 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury A support group for GLBT people living
Hampton Bays Mingle with HIV/AIDS. 2nd & 4th Thursdays, www.liglbtnetwork.org, 516.323.0011 3-5 p.m. Hampton Bays Senior Center, Monday Mingle 25 Ponquogue Ave., Mondays, 11 a.m.-1 p.m. Hampton Bays Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, SAGE-LI’s bi-monthly social for GLBT 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore seniors 50+ on the East End. www.liglbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
OUTlet Fridays, 8 p.m.-Midnight Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore
SAGE-LI’s weekly social for GLBT seniors 50+ at The Center at Bay Shore. www.liglbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
TRUE Calling Tuesdays, 6-8 p.m. Nassau: Center at Woodbury 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury LIGALY is offering a great opportunity for black and Latino gay and bisexual youth and their friends to show off their skills! Sing, act, dance, or perform. www.liglbtnetwork.org, 516.323.0011
Women 2 Women Tuesdays, 7:15-8:45 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore W2W is dedicated to providing a safe and supportive space for lesbians age 40+.
You Gotta Believe Mondays, 6-9 p.m. Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore The Long Island GLBT Community Center has partnered with You Gotta Believe, a non-profit organization that places teenagers into permanent adoptive homes, to provide Adoptive Parent Preparation Classes! If you are interested in participating, please call 631.665.2300. www.liglbtnetwork.org
Youth Group Tuesdays, 5-7 p.m. Fridays, 4-7 p.m. East End: The Hamptons GLBT Center, 44 Union St., Sag Harbor All East End youth should come check out this new hot GLBT spot. Every Tuesday is a fun interactive youth group: hang out with others in the lounge. You won’t want to miss it! www.liglbtnetwork.org, 631.899.4950
Youth Support Group
Interactive leadership program 4th Thursday, 5-6p.m. promoting sexual health for GLBT young Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, people. 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore www.liglbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300 For all youth under 21 to come share their thoughts, problems and ups and downs Safe Schools Team in a confidential, safe space. Wednesdays, 6-8 p.m. www.liglbtnetwork.org, 631.899.4950
Suffolk: Center at Bay Shore, 34 Park Ave., Bay Shore
Youth leadership program for young people committed to creating safer schools on Long Island. www.liglbtnetwork.org, 631.665.2300
Sag Harbor Mingle 1st and 3rd Fridays, 3-5 p.m. East End: The Hamptons GLBT Center, 44 Union St., Sag Harbor The Hamptons GLBT Center is officially open and SAGE-LI is bringing a Mingle to Sag Harbor! Bring your friends and come meet new ones. www.liglbtnetwork.org, 631.899.4950
SAGE-LI Women at Nassau (SWAN) Wednesdays, 7:30-8:45 p.m. Nassau: Center at Woodbury, 20 Crossways Park Dr. North, Suite 110, Woodbury A social and discussion group for lesbian, bisexual, and transgender women as well as women questioning their identity. There will be no SWAN on Wednesday, September 17th. www.liglbtnetwork.org, 516.323.0011
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be scene LIGALY Summer programming July & August With school out of session, LIGALY (Long island gay and lesbian youth) provided summer programs for youth at their bay shore and east end centers. youth took part in Activities ranging from a beach day to a barbecue in riverhead and a trip to the bronx zoo.
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LIVING OUT
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living healthy Ask Chris
by Chris mcnamee
Curing Those Back to School Blues Although summer doesn’t officially end until the third week of September, most parents can probably agree that the season of sun and fun comes to an end when the school year begins. How do you feel as the first day of school approaches? Do you experience the same angst as a parent that you felt as a kid? Are you nervous for your child, wondering how he or she will navigate those hallways without your hand to hold onto? Are you more worried about how you will handle the added pressure of getting your child dressed for school as you try to get ready for work? Perhaps the logistics involved when your children need to be at different places at the same time causes you more stress than you care to acknowledge? Do you feel just a little guilty for being happy to have a few hours to yourself again endearing sound of small voices calling you to their aid every time you shut the bathroom door or crack open a book?
Although there is not much consolation to be found in the fact that it is illegal for your child’s school to discriminate against him or her based on your sexual orientation, the fact is the vast majority of teachers care very deeply about their students and welcome any input from parents that will help them get to know their young charges. In all of my dealings with gay parents, I have yet to hear one “coming out ” at school story that hasn’t ended with the teacher thanking the parent for his or her honesty and giving heartfelt assurances that every effort would be made to make the child feel comfortable and accepted. Coming out as transgendered might be a little more difficult for parents than simply coming out as gay, especially if the parent has not finished transitioning or the child has only recently become aware that a change is taking place. But here again, honesty when dealing with your child’s school is the best way to go. When revealing your trans status to your child’s school, keep in mind that outside of the gay and trans communities, it is not uncommon for people to have little or no understanding of the transition process. Be prepared to educate the teacher and other school staff members, and try to do it in as non-threatening a manner as possible.
But all kidding aside, the start of a new school year can be very anxiety-producing for anyone, but particularly so for gay or gender-nonconforming parents or children. The idea of coming out to a child’s teacher or school administrator used to be fraught with fear of rejection or ostracism, and worry about negative repercussions for the child.
Remain aware that the school’s efforts to accept you openly might be met with push-back from some less enlightened parents. Consider asking the school to host an educational forum for the parents of your child’s classmates, wherein you, and perhaps your doctor or other medical professional, can address any concerns they or school support staff may have.
Now that gay marriage is legal, even commonplace, in our area, this conversation is likely to be much easier. Indeed, some school registration forms and other legal documents, including birth certificates, reference “Parent 1” and “Parent 2” rather than Mother and Father. But for some of us, this is still not an easy subject to broach. Fortunately, the law and public opinion are on our side.
While you may be met with some negativity, there is also a good chance that the other parents will welcome the opportunity to discuss ways in which they can explain your situation to their children using age-appropriate terminology and a non-judgmental tone. It would not be unusual for your child to be somewhat troubled by your transition, and having the support of his or her classmates, teachers, counselors and other administrators, can help make this time easier on everyone involved.
If you answered “yes” to any of the above questions, then congratulations are in order. You are officially the best kind of parent, a normal one.
Once your child has entered middle school or high school, it won’t be as important for the school staff to know about your sexuality as it was during the elementary years. However, if it is your adolescent, rather than you, who is gay or transgendered, it will be vitally important for the school to understand that protecting him or her from bullying and harassment is the obligation of the institution.
A
s your child’s main advocate, it’s up to you to ensure that the school takes this responsibility seriously and that your child’s right to an education in a safe environment is not violated. Taking a no-nonsense approach that makes it clear from the outset that you expect reasonable accommodations to be made lets the school know that you will be taking an active role in ensuring that your child’s rights are protected. Teens and even pre-teens are coming out as gay and trans earlier and more publically than they ever have before. Many of them are fortunate to have Gay-Straight Alliance organizations at their schools, and are accepted by their peers with neither fanfare nor reticence. The open and affirming atmosphere at their school allows them the freedom to be themselves, with the support of their teachers and counselors. Not all gay or gender-different kids are so lucky, of course, and parents can be faced with difficult choices regarding their child’s education. Sometimes, despite an administration’s best efforts, gay or gender-different children still find themselves victimized by hateful slurs or actions on the part of fellow students. In some cases, the adults that are supposed to protect them from such abuse are more inclined to look the other way than to intervene on their behalf. In such situations, it may be necessary to enlist the help of an attorney who can convince the school district that transferring your child to a more appropriate learning environment might be the only solution. Given the high suicide rate among children who have been bullied, regardless of the real or perceived reason for the harassment, it is vitally important that parents and administrators work together to ensure that children feel safe and accepted at school and are given the opportunity to benefit from all that their schools and communities have to offer. All of our children deserve a good education, in a safe space, where they can feel free to express themselves and grow to their fullest potential, and parents must remain ever vigilant in order to make sure that they do.
about the author: Chris mcnamee has a b.S. in Family Services/Child Studies, a M.A. in Intersex Conditions and Gender Identity Disorders in Children and Adolescents and is the Former owner/operator of Kid ‘n Kaboodle Child Care as well as the Former Coordinator for Long Island Family Connections, Gay Parents Support Network.
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Wills, Trusts & Same-Sex Estate Planning LIVING OUT
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living healthy
wellness
Vacationing Without Blowing It: Healthy Tips For
by jennifer nyx Here are a few tips to get you on the “road” to health and a happy vacation:
Choosing Wisely
Smarter Travels
Traveling and vacationing can prove to make healthy eating a real challenge. If you don’t have a place to prepare your own food on the road, such as a beach house or cabin rental, you can easily find yourself at the whim of convenience stores and fast food restaurants. Traveling to a tropical island can offer a whole new array of food, research ahead of time which exotic cuisine is the healthiest so you can vacation without worry of hurting your waistline. The same holds true for vacationing to the wilderness, vacationing at a resort in the middle of nowhere can leave you with little choices of what you consume. Always plan ahead to make sure you can make healthy choices no matter where you are.
Planning Ahead
Fill up on healthy foods at the breakfast or lunch buffet, especially if you are staying at a resort or hotel. Almost all of them have healthier options alongside the bacon, sausage, French toast and doughnuts. Enjoy some eggs if you like, and load up on fresh fruits, salads, vegetables, and whole grains such as oatmeal. Focus on the “crowding out” theory – eat plenty of the good stuff, so you won’t have as much room for bad stuff.
With the power of the internet, such planning has never been easier. Find out how close you will be staying to farmer’s markets and grocery stores that carry fresh produce so you can load up as soon as you arrive. Do your research to find the healthiest restaurants along the way, especially local restaurants that use local products. Restaurants that take pride in using local products provide healthy options and prepare their meals in healthier ways. Continued on page 25
Exciting Career Opportunities! Grow at The Network and make a difference in the lives of GLBT Long Islanders Open Positions
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HIV/STD Outreach and Testing Program Leader (P/T)
HIV/STD Bar and Club Outreach Leader (P/T)
Van Driver (P/T)
Long Island Gay and Lesbian Youth, Inc. (LIGALY) is seeking a part-time HIV/STD Outreach and Testing Program Leader for an average of 10-12 hours per week. Will conduct a variety of activities to promote getting tested for HIV and STDs and educating gay and bisexual men about how to reduce risky sexual behaviors. Will provide HIV/STD testing, deliver counseling, testing and referral services, distribute safer sex materials, conduct outreach in bars, clubs, commercial sex venues, community events and other locations and engage young people for HIV/STD prevention programming. Preferred qualifications include someone with HIV Counseling, Testing and Referral (CTR) experience or a willingness to be trained; willing to work flexible hours; outgoing personality; active NYS Driver’s License; reliable transportation. Preferences: bilingual English/ Spanish, phlebotomy training, H.S. degree or GED.
Long Island Gay and Lesbian Youth, Inc. (LIGALY) is seeking a part-time HIV/STD Bar and Club Outreach Leader for an average of 10-12 hours per week. Bar and Club Outreach Leaders work to conduct a variety of activities to promote getting tested for HIV and STDs and educating gay and bisexual men about how to reduce risky sexual behaviors. Will provide HIV/STD testing, deliver counseling, testing and referral services (CTR), promote HIV/STD testing and distribute safer sex materials, conduct outreach in bars, clubs, commercial sex venues, community events and other locations and engage young people for HIV/STD prevention programming. Preferred qualifications include someone with HIV Counseling, Testing and Referral (CTR) experience or a willingness to be trained; willing to work flexible hours; outgoing personality; active NYS Driver’s License; reliable transportation. Preferences: bilingual English/ Spanish, phlebotomy training, H.S. degree or GED.
Long Island Gay and Lesbian Youth, Inc. (LIGALY) is currently seeking a van driver to pick up and drop off youth from both Suffolk and Nassau counties for its programs. The driver assures safe and reliable transportation to and from LIGALY programs for youth. Must have a clean and valid New York State-issued driver’s license; basic automotive maintenance skills; an ability to exercise good judgment; flexible availability afternoon/evenings and a commitment to the GLBT youth community. Preferred additional qualifications include having a GPS to help navigate Nassau and Suffolk and/or a knowledge of MapQuest/ Google maps; experience working with youth, particularly from at-risk populations and knowledge of first-aid/CPR.
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Apply Online at: liglbtnetwork.org/careers
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Sitting Down If you have a choice, choose sit down restaurants instead of fast food. Fast food is always bad food, and in sit down restaurants, at least you have more options and can make more requests about how you want your food to be prepared.Avoid deep fried foods, entrees with cream sauces, and big desserts. If you’re visiting a place you’ve never been before, try to find the healthiest foods that make the area famous – such as fresh fish.
Packing Snacks Take your own snacks for a road trip or plane ride to keep you from stopping for unhealthy snacks at convenience stores or vending machines. Trail mix, homemade granola, chopped raw vegetables, hummus, apples, and dried fruits are all good options. Simple trail mixes that contain almonds, dried cherries, cashews, coconut, and raisins (or any of your favorite nuts) can be put together in minutes.
Staying Happy If you’re on vacation, there will be times you’ll want to do something less than completely healthy. Just be careful about what you choose and make sure that if you’re taking in extra calories, sugar, or fat, the dish is worth the sacrifice! Overall, you want to enjoy your vacation and denying yourself little indulgences might damper your mood. Enjoy wisely and have fun during your time in paradise.
Hotel Indigo_Living Out_halfpage_v2_NO BLEED.pdf 1 1/22/13 3:35 PM About the author: Jennifer Nyx is a Holistic Health Coach and Personal Trainer dedicated to support her clients with their health goals and empower them to make lasting changes in their behavior and lifestyle.
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living smart Travel
by Joey Amato
Out Destination: Indianapolis It’s been called the “Crossroads of America” by many and “The Circle City” by others. But why is Indianapolis on the tip of everybody’s tongue lately? Is it because of their thriving arts and cultural attractions, historymaking same-sex marriage rulings, or a bustling LGBT business community? Probably a combination of all three. This past June, Indy Pride drew close to 100,000 people to its downtown, which feels more like New York or Chicago then a midsized city. The streets are teeming with people at all hours of the day and night. Architectural wonders are around every corner, but the highlight of course is Monument Circle, where a 284-ft neoclassical monument stands enclosed by a circular, brick-paved street that intersects Meridian Street and Market Street. Not too far from downtown is Massachusetts Avenue, the city’s cultural hub. Endless shops, restaurants and art galleries line the street, which stretches several blocks. Mass Ave. is a hotbed for the LGBT community due to its gay-friendly establishments. A few worth noting are Metro, tini, Mass Ave Pub and FortyFive°, a sushi bar/restaurant which transforms itself into the hottest spot on the Avenue when the sun goes down.
(LEFT) PART OF THE INDIANAPOLIS SKYLINE; (BELOW) THE ORANGUTAN EXHIBIT AT THE INDIANAPOLIS ZOO
seating area, large bedroom and a bathroom with a shower so large, it could probably fit 6 adults comfortably…no, I didn’t try, it’s just an estimate. Well-fed and well rested, put on your favorite outfit and head to Talbott Street, Indy’s only LGBT nightclub. The multi-level establishment offers quality drink specials, great DJs from around
Visitors looking for an off-thebeaten path hotel should check out the new Hotel Broad Ripple, a boutique property located in the trendy Broad Ripple neighborhood just a few miles north of the city. The 9-room hotel is located adjacent to the Monon Trail and within a 5-minute walk to dozens of yummy and affordable restaurants. My favorite in the neighborhood is called Flatwater. With river views and live music on the patio, Flatwater is a great place to unwind after a long day touring the city. After dinner, check out the unique Broad Ripple shops or head back to your suite to get ready for the evening. My room at Hotel Broad Ripple featured a 26
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the country and is the perfect place to check out the city’s young and fabulous set. If clubbing isn’t your scene, head to one of almost a dozen LGBT bars. Greg’s is a friendly neighborhood bar, while Varsity reigns as Indy’s oldest gay bar. English Ivy’s is also worth a visit, offering a full late-night
menu until 2AM to satisfy your after-club munchies. Indianapolis has no shortage of attractions. Start your day at the Indianapolis Zoo and visit their new orangutan exhibition or catch an incredible dolphin show. A short drive away are both the Eiteljorg Museum of American Indians and Western Art as well as the Indiana State Museum. Both buildings are truly works of art themselves and deserve the entire afternoon to explore. Begin the next day with a visit of the Indianapolis Museum of Art, currently exhibiting For America: Prints of the American Art-Union. The American Art-Union promoted American art between 1939 and 1851 by distributing engravings of the best American paintings of the day to its nationwide membership. These engravings reproduced major paintings by several artists including Asher B. Durand, William Sydney Mount and Thomas Cole. This exhibit runs until September 28th. When you arrive in Indy, check to see if you can catch a performance of The Cabaret. It
will be an experience you won’t soon forget. Shannon Forsel and her team bring in worldclass talent to entertain guests who dine on exquisite cuisine and fabulous cocktails. The Cabaret performs at the exclusive Columbia Club, a breathtaking, historic building overlooking Monument Circle. Upcoming performances include Jeremy Jordan, star of Broadway, film, and television, singing music from Broadway’s Newsies, SMASH, and his upcoming film, The Last 5 Years. Those looking to stay downtown should think about checking into a room at the four-diamond Omni Severin Hotel. Within walking distance from The Cabaret, the property features a host of amenities including luxury linens, an indoor pool and 24-hour fitness center. Located directly across from Union Station, the hotel is the perfect choice for individuals seeking to feel the energy of downtown Indianapolis. Within a 3-hour flight of most major cities in the U.S., Indy is worth visiting this fall. And don’t forget to catch a Colts game while in town. For more information, visit www.visitindy.com Photos Courtesy of Carl Van Rooy Photography
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living smart
recipes
Pack the Perfect Lunch
Here are a few recipes that are sure to satisfy the pickiest of eaters and even moms and dads!
Turkey-Meatball Pitas 380 Calories (per serving)
Garden Turkey Sandwich with Lemon Mayo
300 Calories (per serving) Ingredients 1 tsps grated lemon peel 1 tbsps low-fat mayonnaise 2 slices whole-grain bread 1 cups loosely packed baby spinach leaves 2 ounces turkey breast, sliced 1 small tomato, sliced Directions 1. Stir grated lemon peel with mayonnaise; spread on both slices bread. 2. On 1 slice bread, alternately layer spinach leaves, turkey, and tomato, starting and ending with spinach. Top with second bread slice.
Granola Bars Ingredients 2 cups quick cooking oats 1 cup all purpose flour 3/4 cup packed brown sugar 3/4 cup raisins 1/2 cup wheat germ 1/2 tsp salt 1/2 tsp cinnamon 1/2 cup walnuts, chopped 1/2 cup vegetable oil 1/2 cup honey 1 egg 2 tsps vanilla extract Directions 1. Preheat oven to 350°. Line a 9x13 inch baking pan with parchment paper, spray with vegetable oil. 2. In a large bowl, stir together oats, flour, brown sugar, raisins, wheat germ, salt, cinnamon, and walnuts. In a smaller bowl, thoroughly blend oil, honey, egg, and vanilla; pour into the flour
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3.
mixture, and mix by hand until the liquid is evenly distributed. Press evenly into the prepared baking pan. Bake 25 to 30 minutes in the preheated oven, or until the edges are golden. Cool completely in pan before turning out onto a cutting board and cutting into bars.
Perfect Guacamole 25 Calories (per serving)
Ingredients 1 jalapeño, seeded, finely chopped 1/3 cups fresh cilantro leaves, chopped 1/4 cup finely chopped Vidalia onion 1/2 tsp salt 2 ripe avocados 1 plum tomato Plain tortilla chips Directions 1. In mortar, combine jalapeño, cilantro, onion, and salt; with pestle, grind until mixture becomes juicy and thick (onion can still be slightly chunky). 2. Cut each avocado lengthwise in half around seed. Twist halves in opposite directions to separate. Slip spoon between pit and fruit and work pit out. With spoon, scoop fruit from peel onto cutting board. 3. Cut tomato crosswise in half. Squeeze halves to remove seeds and juice. Coarsely chop tomato. 4. If mortar is large enough, add avocado and chopped tomato to onion mixture in mortar. (If mortar is small, combine avocado, tomato, and onion mixture in bowl.) Mash slightly with pestle or spoon until mixture is blended but still somewhat chunky. 5. Guacamole is best when served as soon as it’s made. If not serving right away, press plastic wrap directly onto surface of guacamole to prevent discoloration and refrigerate up to 1 hour. Serve with chips.
Ingredients 1 lb. ground turkey 2 slices low-fat bread, chopped 2 tbsps grated onion 1 large egg white 1 1/2 tsps ground cumin 1 1/4 tsps salt 5 whole-wheat pitas, 6-inch 1/2 large cucumber, peeled and cut into 3/4-inch pieces 1 container nonfat plain yogurt, 8-ounce 2 tbsps chopped fresh cilantro 4 cups sliced romaine lettuce Directions 1. Preheat oven to 425°. Spray 15 1/2-inch by 10 1/2-inch jellyroll pan with nonstick cooking spray. 2. In large bowl, mix ground turkey, bread, onion, egg white, cumin, 3/4 teaspoon salt, and 3 tablespoons water. 3. Shape turkey mixture into 25 meatballs. Place meatballs in pan and bake 12 to 15 minutes until cooked through. 4. Cut about 1 inch from top of each pita. Wrap pitas in foil. After meatballs have baked 5 minutes, warm pitas in oven until meatballs are done. 5. Meanwhile, mix cucumber, yogurt, cilantro or mint, and 1/2 teaspoon salt. 6. To serve, fill pitas with lettuce and meatballs; top with cucumber sauce.
Kettle Corn Ingredients 1/4 cup vegetable oil 1/4 cup white sugar 1/2 cup unpopped popcorn kernels Directions 1. Heat the vegetable oil in a large pot over medium heat. Once hot, stir in the sugar and popcorn. Cover, and shake the pot constantly to keep the sugar from burning. Once the popping has slowed to once every 2 to 3 seconds, remove the pot from the heat and continue to shake for a few minutes until the popping has stopped. Put kettle corn into an airtight container.
Romano-Cheese Flatbread Crisps 35 Calories (per serving) Ingredients 2 1/4 cups flour 1 1/2 tsps baking powder 1 tsps salt 1 tsps ground black pepper 1 tbsps olive oil 1/2 cup grated Romano cheese Directions 1. In medium bowl, stir flour, baking powder, salt, and pepper. Add 3/4 cup water; stir until dough comes together in a ball. With hands, knead dough in bowl until smooth, about 2 minutes. (Or, in food processor with knife blade attached, combine flour, baking powder, salt, and pepper; pulse processor on and off to blend ingredients. With processor running, through feed tube, add 3/4 cup water; continue to process about 30 seconds or until dough forms a smooth ball.) Divide dough in half; cover half of dough with plastic wrap and set aside. 2. Preheat oven to 350°. With floured rolling pin, roll half of dough into a paper-thin rectangle, about 20 by 12 inches. (Don’t worry if edges are irregular.) With pizza wheel or sharp knife, cut dough lengthwise in half to form two 20- by 6-inch rectangles. Cut rectangles crosswise into 2- by 6-inch strips. 3. Place strips on 2 ungreased large cookie sheets; let rest 10 minutes. Brush strips lightly with olive oil; sprinkle with half of grated cheese. 4. Place cookie sheets on 2 oven racks. Bake strips 15 to 18 minutes until lightly browned, rotating cookie sheets between upper and lower racks halfway through baking time. Immediately remove flatbread crisps to wire racks to cool. Repeat with remaining dough. Store in tightly covered container, use within 2 weeks.
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living smart
what’s the t?
by Alexis Capitini
Back to School on a Budget The hottest fall gadgets and technology for all your back to school needs.
$uper $avings Kingston DataTraveler SE9
Every year school tuition seems to get more expensive and you always feel like you to have to purchase more books, supplies and gadgets. Make going back to school a little bit easier on your bank account with these super saving products. If you have some extra cash, don’t be afraid to spend a little of it on yourself.
Belkin SurgePlus USB Swivel Charger
$9-$25
$20
AmazonBasics Lightning Cables $13-$15
SanDisk Cruzer Fit
URC WR7 Universal Remote Control
$6-$30
$20 SanDisk Ultra microSD Card $10-$36
Logitech M325 Wireless Mouse $14-$20 Medialink USB Bluetooth Adaptor $10
AmazonBasics iPhone 5/5s Case
Logitech Z50 Speaker $17
$3.50
EasyAcc 4-Port USB Wall Charger $13
Logitech Wireless Keyboard K360 $23 AmazonBasics HDMI Cable $8 (2 pack)
Splurge Worthy: Epson Stylus NX430 Small-in-One All-in-One Printer, $100 This small printer manages to fit a printer, scanner and copier all into one tight package. Great for dorm rooms where space is an issue, the Epson’s iPrint software expands your printing reach to compatible Android and iOS devices. The only thing this printer lacks is an Ethernet port for wired networking and the “moderatecapacity” ink cartridge bay is a money pit for those who print high volumes of photos and color documents. However, the Epson Stylus NX430 is a solid investment for students and office jockeys alike who print high-quality photos and documents without the space for a larger format device.
Microsoft Surface Pro 3, $730 The Surface Pro 3 is thinner and lighter than its predecessors despite having a 12-inch display with a higher resolution. The new kickstand makes for easier set up and use and its keyboard cover remains the best in its class. This newest version is also optimized for a digital pen, which is included. While the keyboard cover isn’t included in the base price and the chassis lacks pen storage, the Surface Pro 3 is more successful as a tablet than as a laptop replacement but is great for students who want to type their notes without carrying around a bulky laptop.
Streaming Specialty’s: Roku 3, $95
Google Chromecast, $35
All students need some downtime to enjoy streaming TV and video and the Roku 3 is the best box out there to do that. The remote has a headphone jack which is perfect if you share a living space with roommates and the amazingly fast processor means it won’t seem outdated anytime soon. Roku’s platform supports over 1,500 apps including Netflix, Amazon Instant Video, HBO Go, Hulu Plus and Pandora. It’s crossplatform search makes it easy to find what you’re looking for no matter which service it is on.
For only $35, Google’s Chromecast is an incredibly cheap video streamer that makes a great fit for Android-loving users. It’s the best device for watching and listening to Google-purchased movies, TV shows and music on your TV. The thumb drive like design makes it virtually invisible when plugged into the TV and its app library continues to improve while currently supporting Netflix, YouTube, Pandora, HBO Go and Rdio.
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Our Pick: The Roku 3. Spend the extra cash for this great little streaming box, with over 1,500 apps currently availble it’s worth it. Watch what you want, when you want.
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Quality Healthcare Services for Individuals with Special Needs and the Community at Large
Audiology *Dental *Dermatology *Endocrinology *Gynecology *Neurology Occupational Therapy *Optometry *Rehabilitative Medicine *Physical Therapy Podiatry *Primary Care *Psychiatry *Psychotherapy *Speech Therapy
Comprehensive and Caring Medical Services Lunchtime, Evening & Weekend Hours Medicare, Medicaid, and Some Major Health Insurance Plans Accepted Sliding Scale Available for those Eligible Most Credit Cards Accepted
Family Wellness Center
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You are not alone, you are…FREE To Be FREE To Be is a community of men and women dedicated to socialization, advocacy, and education. We are a support network that provides a safe environment to grow together.
“Disability Is A Matter Of Perception. If You Can Do Just One Thing Well, You Are Needed By Someone” -Martina Navratilova
Socialization/Group Meetings FREE To Be provides an engaging space for GLBTQ individuals and friends, and we encourage all who are interested to come and join us. Meetings Include Inspirational guest speakers, workshops, open discussions, social events, and community involvement. Next Meeting Date: September 30, 2014 Time: 4:30pm to 6:00pm Location: FREE, 191 Bethpage-Sweet Hollow Road l Old Bethpage, New York 11804 To learn more about FREE TO BE or to become a member, please contact us at freetobe@familyres.org Family Residences and Essential Enterprises, Inc. 191 Bethpage-Sweet Hollow Road l Old Bethpage, New York 11804 www.familyres.org l 516-870-1637
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living smart
finance
EIGHT THINGS EVERY COLLEGE STUDENT SHOULD KNOW It’s back to school time, which means tuition school costs are back on the minds of parents and students alike. Whether you are an incoming college freshman or a senior, here are eight things you should know.
No Major? No Problem
Use Your Advisor
Your major as an entering college freshman doesn’t matter as much as you think it does. In fact, in most cases it doesn’t lock you in to anything. If you are unsure of what you want to major in as a freshman, it is okay.
Your school will provide you with a catalog of courses offered, the prerequisites and requirements needed for each class and major, and requirements you must satisfy in order to graduate.
You can use your freshman year as a time to explore, taking classes in subjects you never thought about studying before to help you hone in on what you want to do with your life.
If you have a question that goes beyond the catalog or just need a little guidance, go to your advisor—they can help you with any scheduling or course selection questions you may have.
Talk to your professors: introduce yourself, ask questions, visit during office hours, and make sure they know your name. Be sincere in showing your efforts in the classroom. Your professors will begin to see that you are trying and your efforts will pay off. As a result, they will be more willing to go out of their way to help you, and you may even be able to use them as references later on.
Textbook Truths There are two simple rules to follow: •
Don’t buy your textbooks too early.
•
Save money by buying and selling online (or, buy used books at your campus bookstore).
Just because it’s written on paper doesn’t mean that you’re actually going to use it enough to get your money’s worth.
Balancing Acts
Avoiding Debt
Balancing an academic schedule, extracurricular activities, a job, and, on top of all that, a social life can be extremely demanding.
A simply monthly budget will prevent you from overspending and will make paying the bills much easier. Allow yourself a weekly allowance for entertainment purposes and stick to it.
Learn to balance schoolwork by registering for the number of classes you feel comfortable taking on. Keep in mind that you still need to save time in your schedule for rest and socializing.
Powerful Internships Plan on getting an internship if you don’t already have one. Job recruiters love practical experience, so plan on getting some before you graduate and you should be in great shape for your first job.
Only use a credit card for emergencies. Sticking to your budget and remembering that little things add up fast will help to keep you debt free.
Internships will not only provide you with practical, real-world experience, but you may even be one step ahead of the game and land a job offer from the company you intern for you before you even graduate. 30
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APR*
• No closing costs • Lines up to $500,000 • Low initial draw
For more information, or to apply today, contact Kyle Caravousanos at 516-349-6870 or kcaravousanos@bethpagefcu.com *APR = Annual Percentage Rate. For two years, Prime for life, thereafter. Rates and terms accurate as of 06/01/14 and are subject to change without notice. All offers of credit are subject to credit approval; applicants may be offered credit at higher rates and other terms. Loan-to-value restrictions may apply. Hazard insurance is required on all loans secured by real property; Flood insurance may also be required. No closing costs on new HELOCs up to $500,000. Closing costs paid by Bethpage must be repaid by the borrower(s) if line is closed within first 36 months. HELOC is a variable rate product with a maximum APR of 18%. The introductory rate is 2.24% APR for 2 years for members who take an initial draw of $25,000, maintain this balance for one (1) year, and have automatic transfers from any Bethpage account for the monthly payment on the account. New HELOCs only. Prime rate as of 06/01/14 = 3.25%. Home Equities not offered in TX. $5.00 minimum share account required. Membership conditions may apply.
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living smart
Beauty
by Brittany perry
Fall for Your Hair Simple Tips for Fabulous Fall Hair
Our mothers always told us to protect our skin during the hot summer months, and with good reason, but what about our hair? Yes, a season full of sun exposure, salt water, and chlorine can be just as harmful to our tresses as to our skin. As the leaves fade to brown we find ourselves itching for something to spruce up our hairstyle. By following these simple tips you can learn to “fall” in love with your hair. Clarify You may want to cleanse and revive sun-drenched hair before styling. Paul Mitchell’s Shampoo Three leaves hair feeling rejuvenated, as deep cleansers remove chlorine and minerals while strengthening strands and minimizing future build-up. Fairy Tales is an all-natural, organic hair care routine for children, which removes chlorine, sea salt, and minerals while leaving hair feeling soft and hydrated. Top Knot-ch The upcoming fall season sees celebrities and individuals alike incorporating the topknot bun into their go to hairstyles. Whether worn as an individual bun or by parting the hair into two separate buns, this hairstyle will set the standards high. This simple hairstyle looks great whether on a fashion runway or in the hallways at school.
Styling Savings These three styling products will make you look like a thousand bucks without having to spend a thousand bucks. Get the look you want for the price you deserve! Remington T Studio Wide Plate Straightener, $34.99 The Remington T Studio Wide Plate Straightener with Tourmaline takes less time to straighten thick hair and has a digital temperature reading so you know just how hot it is. Just be prepared for an arm workout as some consumers caution the straightener is on the heavy side. Pair with: Garnier Fructis Flat Iron Straightening Mist, $4 Conair Instant Heat ¾” Curling Iron, $20.99 This highly-rated curling iron is great for those who are well-versed in heat styling. The Conair Instant Heat ¾” Curling Iron only takes about a minute to heat up. The curling iron also holds onto hair well and does not dry hair out. Pair with: TRESemmé Thermal Creations Curl Activator Spray, $5
Ombré This season looks to nature for inspiration. The ombré look blends colors together as do the fading leaves. This hairstyle is simple to achieve and requires low maintenance so even if your morning starts late, your hair will look effortlessly chic. Go bold with a drastically different color or, for hair color purists, a color that is slightly different from your natural color with just enough of a difference for a little pop.
Vidal Sassoon VS783 Ionic Styler Dryer, $39.99 The Vidal Sassoon VS783 1875 Watt Ionic Styler Dryer is a hit for its range of temperature settings and attachments. Users with frizzy hair rave about the diffuser attachment which gives them soft and shiny hair. Pair with: Aussie Heat Protecting Shine Spray, $3
Red Carpet Report Card
The 66th Annual Primetime Emmys took place on August 25 and all the stars were out to strut their stuff on the red carpet. See who stole the show with their gorgeous get-ups and who just had us saying “WOW,” and not in a good way.
A+
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F
Sofia Ve
Lena Dunham, Girls
COrange is the New Black
Sex t in n io momen a major fash ier d el ha At n an ra pl Ka Ca white Donna ght the ou a black-andbr e Sh touts. gown with cu ring it with sideswept ea drama by w els by Brian ne jewels, he dith Leiber. hair, Neil La Ju by ch ut d a cl Atwood, an
D
rgara, Modern Fa mily The 42 year-old bombshell got all glammed up in a white, strap less Roberto Ca valli with metall ic accents and dia mond jewels.
Laverne Cox
n, Masters of
Story Armani Privé go wn with Lorraine Schwar tz jewels
B+
A
Lizzy Capla
Sarah Paulson,
American Horror
Marc Bouwer gown with an elaborate train, matching Fred Leighton jewels, and perfect makeup.
Giambattista Valli ensemble, did she fall into a cotton candy machine?
pon
Laura Pre
e New Black Orange is th s’s teal The actres l satin ca ri et m asym ile Gustavo Cad to be ed gown seem Prepon’s ! wearing her r and ai h er st lu lack n’t help makeup did . n io at the situ
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points of view op-ed
by rev. irene monroe
Transphobia at women’s colleges The school semester is revving up. And for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer students their presence can be met with mix reactions. For example, with university and college commencements that take place in June so too do class reunions. When Caleb (not his real name) drove up from South Carolina to his class reunion this year he didn’t expect the unwelcoming reception he got from both his classmates and the college. Caleb shared with me his reason for attending a women’s college as an out lesbian undergraduate in the 70’s and now returning as a trans man alum in 2014. But he never fathomed his transition would be the primary cause of banishment from the sisterhood that sustained and nurtured belief in himself years after graduation and, especially experiencing transphobia from an elite women’s liberal arts college in the LGBTQ-friendly state of Massachusetts. While it’s easy to assume that much of Caleb’s experience of inhospitality at his alma mater would point to a generational divide between women’s colleges in the 1970s to now, unfortunately that’s not the case. In March 2013, Calliope Wong, a trans woman, hoping to be one of the 2017 incoming undergraduates at Smith College was denied consideration because her “FAFSA” – Free Application for Federal Student Aid – stated her gender as male. Today women’s college administrators are having just as much angst and uneasiness with the reality of gender fluidity as they did back in the day with the reality of lesbian and bisexual women on campus. “I don’t want to get to a point where we have a row of guys in the back of the class with baseball caps on,” Smith’s vice president for enrollment told students.
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In Kiera Feldman’s article “Who Are Women’s College For?”Mount Holyoke President Lynn Pasquerella replied, “In addition to academic excellence, it’s being a woman.” Institutional transphobia is ubiquitous in many of our revered pillars in society where there’s
Smith’s vice president for enrollment wrote to Feldman. Clearly, the principle concept of women empowerment that states we define ourselves for ourselves is totally missed by this female administrator. The other argument used against trans women and trans men
“And trans women, if they were in attendance, were invisible.” unabashedly little to no effort to change. The one institution that you do not expect transphobia to rear its ugly head, given that its founding principle was to address gender discrimination, is a women’s college. Gender has always been a social construction shaped by factors of race, class, country, sexual orientation and gender identities, to name just a few. From the biblical story of Eve to our present-day, heterosexual maledominant societies across the globe continue to try to define us women solely by our reproductive and sex organs.
ironically is Title IX, which prohibits gender discrimination. “No person in the United States shall, on the basis of sex, be excluded from participation in, be denied the benefits of, or be subjected to discrimination under any education program or activity receiving federal financial assistance.” Not surprisingly, however, given how privilege is usually doled out and executed a proviso was granted to elite private institutions like Harvard, and the Seven Sister Colleges, giving them the arbitrary and capricious decision to accept or to reject students on the basis of gender. But this past April, after long and heated deliberations on the rights of transgender students, the Department of Education
finally issued new guide rules incorporating the protection of transgender students. Title IX energized feminist activism, promoted gender equality, debunked prescribed gender roles, and finally put to rest us women as second-class citizens. And there’s no reason to exclude transgender men and women from these same benefits. While many of these women’s colleges have been perceived bastions of inclusive feminism, especially with the rise of the Second Wave Feminist Movement, unfortunately they have primarily been an intentionally exclusive women’s country clubs that spoke to Betty Friedan’s feminine mystique of upper-crust “pumps and pearls” wearing white women. Back in the day when I was a Wellesley College undergraduate, women like myself – African American and/or lesbian or bisexual – were no more welcomed at these schools than men were. And trans women, if they were in attendance, were invisible. The battle to open these colleges’ pearly gates to women of color, and to women of various sexual orientations and gender identities is a fight that shouldn’t still be taking place. And this struggle to accept transgender students and to welcome back transgender alums – like Caleb with deep pockets – in a steady dwindling sisterhood of women’s colleges should be a nobrainer.
Oddly, one of the arguments for gender discrimination against trans women and trans men being admitted at elite women’s colleges is the misogynist concept we women have fought bitterly against for centuries that states our “biology is destiny.” While some women’s college won’t admit trans women because they are not “biologically” female others won’t admit them because they are not “legally” female. “We don’t define what constitutes a woman – we leave that to other entities or agencies to affirm, ” LIVING OUT
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points of view trans-missions
by gwendolyn Ann smith
This has been a big year for transgender people in the media, most notably with Janet Mock’s book hitting the New York Times Bestseller list, and Laverne Cox’s rise in fame due to her appearance as part of the cast of Orange is the new Black. The latter even landed on the cover of Time magazine. In the wake of her appearance in Time, it stands to reason that other magazines would seek to cover “transgender” in their own pages. When that happens, too, some are bound to get it wrong. Enter The New Yorker.
In the August 4, 2014 edition of the magazine, an article titled “What Is A Woman?” by Michelle Goldberg was published. The subhead read, “The dispute between radical feminism and transgenderism.” I’d like to think that maybe I’m misreading the article entirely. Perhaps it is a sly piece of satire, something akin to their “Obama as a radical Muslim fist bumping his
or “have women’s brains in men’s bodies.” This implies that a transgender person is nothing more than a whim, a passing fancy at best – and mental illness at worst. This flies in the face of decades of science. Speaking of such, the article opts to include Dr. Ray Blanchard. The author does note that Blanchard’s theories are “highly controversial,” but still gives plenty of space for the discussion and acceptance of his work.
Those who have been in the transgender community for any length of time have heard his name. This doctor doesn’t believe that transgender people exist as such – rather he views transgender people as either some form of homosexual that would rather accept themselves as a straight woman versus a gay man, or as an “autogynephile.” The latter is his pet theory that transgender people are nothing more than men with a fetish for feminizing their bodies. In his eyes, there are no exceptions to the above. Many other researchers have discredited his theories. Much space is given to the “radical Feminist” view in this piece, but very little is provided in rebuttal. Indeed, one transwoman who had been interviewed for the article, Julia Serano, has noted on her own blog that most of the content of her interview was cut.
Meanwhile, the author reprints hearsay about violent transgender vandals as if they were fact, without proof to back them up, and paints an unfair picture of transgender people overall.
commando wife” cover from 2008. Sadly, I don’t think they were being quite that sly.
The article itself is more than a little one sided. This isn’t a piece about the dispute so much as it is a tale told from the opinion of someone clearly on one side of a debate, with little more than lip service provided to those on the other. The article itself hits about every trope. It speaks about how transgender people “feel female,” 34
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Yet even with all that, at least they seem to acknowledge that transgender people are human. This seems to be more than Science Magazine opted to do for their July 11th cover photo.
The cover proclaims it a special issue, dedicated to “staying a step ahead of HIV/AIDS.” The cover image shows two women of color in tight dresses and heels, from the neck down. Two other women, similarly dressed, are in the background. It is easy to tell that the women portrayed are sex workers. Many spoke out about the cover, noting that the image dehumanized
the women by cutting off their heads. Jim Austin, an editor with Science, chose to respond on his Twitter account. “You realize they are transgender? Does it matter? That at least colors things, no?” The conversation devolved, with Austin even falling into considering how “interesting” it might be if a man gazing lustfully at the people on the cover “found out” they were trans women. As if this cover was a good case study into anti-transgender violence and the transgender panic defense, I suppose.
Even California Congresswoman Jackie Speier took the magazine to task saying, “The prevalence of the ‘trans panic’ defense, in which perpetrators of violent crimes justify their actions by claiming shock at the identity of a trans person, make this an abysmal motivation for Science’s choice of cover are, particularly since transgender people are disproportionately subject to hate crimes.” She also criticized the cover for sending “the message that women and minorities still do not fully belong in the ‘boy’s club’ of science.” While The New Yorker has not addressed any bias in the piece by Michelle Goldberg, Science Magazine CEO and Executive Publisher, Alan Leshner has apologized for both the cover and Jim Austin’s “unauthorized” Twitter replies.
I have no doubt we’ll see worse examples to come. While I think Science Magazine’s failure will be the end of it for them, I think the Goldberg piece in The New Yorker is far more problematic. It codifies a one-sided story with very little rebuttal. Much like it quotes Dr. Blanchard, others can and will quote that article as gospel.
This is why it becomes all the more important that people speak out. Not just those within the transgender community – who are certainly the most at risk of harm from such reporting – but also our allies. We need everyone to be willing to speak out against falsehood, including lies of convenience and omission.
The author reprints hearsay without proof...and paints an unfair picture of transgender people overall.
We need to tell our own stories, too. The New Yorker should hear from us, Science should hear from us, and any future such issues should be countered with fact. We need to keep standing up and keep speaking out. It’s a big year for us. Let’s keep that going, and raise our voices.
Gwen Smith hopes she is doing her part. You’ll find her at www.gwensmith.com
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