Living. Well August 2016

AUGUST 2016

LIVING WELL

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THE DIGITAL WORLD OF SEX & RELATIONSHIPS HOW TO TALK TO YOUR PRIMARY CARE PHYSICIAN ABOUT ALTERNATIVE CARE

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“Tried & True™” has become a popular part of LWM, giving everyone at LWM the opportunity to share products and services with readers and followers on social media that we have tried and or experienced ourselves and liked enough to share. Many of the products in this issue would be great for college students headed back to school too. If there happens to be something that you disagree with, having had a negative experience; please let us know, as we would certainly consider sharing your opinion. This is one of the reasons why we like to review our reviews, to update and share “Tried & True” products that have integrated themselves into our everyday lifestyle. Reviews have been based on personal purchases, PR Company representation and sampling a particular product directly from the respective company. All of the products, services, and restaurants that have received the “Tried & True Award are not associated with any paid advertising or endorsements with LWM. The reviews in LWM are cultivated opinions based on our personal experiences. From time to time we go back to review our reviews, giving us the opportunity to let you know if a product ended up being disappointing, fell apart or just did not live up to our standards. I am happy to report that to date our track record has been pretty good.

But we aren’t going to get it right every time. We are happy to report that in six years, just three products that received a positive review we now regret. 1) a blow-dryer made by a well-known hair designer in NYC , 2)a vacuum cleaner and three a portable phone charging kit. All three were reviewed several years ago and I am not going to name the actual manufacturers.

However, feel free to contact us if you believe that you may have purchased one of these three items as a result of our recommendations and we will be happy to disclose the manufactures names and try to help you seek resolution if needed, no guarantees, but happy to help.

When we went back and looked at our picks this time we decided to share some of our favorite “Tried & True” products that appeared as far back as 2010 and/or not only still alive and well but most of them we couldn’t live without today. Yes, we could live without eating homemade caramels every day from le Bon Garcon in California...but we would. Each product will include the year it received LWM’s “Tried & True Award”; products do not appear in order of date or preference. Many of the items may be outdated but most are available in a newer version which we can only imagine be even better and or a fresh update in the way it looks.The Soda Stream that first appeared Advertising Inquiries: would in a 2010 issue, which is the one that we are still using is probably no longer available, the company still makes a great product, but continues to update the look each year and not how it works, Brian Strauss - Publisher staying true to the original concept. sales@livingwellmagazine.net Delve into a great salad recipes from a brand new cookbook released just this month, Leon Happy Salads by Jane Baxter & John Vincent and if you are the 10th person to report finding 302-355-0929 Valentino,You win the copy of the cookbook. (make sure we have our mailing address)

HELP WANTED EXPERIENCED AD SALES PEOPLE TO JOIN OUR TEAM! Call: 302-355-0929

Enjoy & Share Everything! Brian and Diane Strauss

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VOLUME 11 NUMBER 08 LIVING.WELL MAGAZINE (ISSN 2325-2448) published monthly by Savendale Media Group, 1519 Old Coach Road Newark, Delaware 19711 Phone:302-355-0929 Fax:302-454-1867 www.livingwellmagazine.net

info@livingwellmagazine.net

www.livingwellmagazine.net LIVING.WELL MAGAZINE© is a monthly publication distributed regionally. All articles and advertisements are accepted in good faith. Living Well Magazine assumes no responsibility or liability for any claims, conditions, products, services, errors, and/or opinions expressed through articles and advertisements appearing in this publication. Please check with your primary health care provider before making any changes. Living Well Magazine welcomes your comments and suggestions. No part of LIVING WELL MAGAZINE™ may be reproduced in any form without permission and written consent. Copyright, All rights reserved. 2015 Various Trademarks Used By Permission Of Their Respective Owners

Editors / Publishers Diane and Brian Strauss Associate Editor: Michael Strauss puppy love™ Creator Sean Strauss Media Development Jonelle Jentilucci Resident Artist and Creator of the Valentino caricature.

Liam McWilliams Design and Graphics Diane Strauss

Cover: designed by dcstrauss For more content, photos, and special give-aways you can find and follow us on most social media forums.

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Many of the items appearing in LWM can be purchased at a local retailer. We have included product website addresses so you can type in your zip code for local buying options and or direct purchasing if not available in your area.

Most books are available at either: Barnes & Noble or Amazon.com

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The prestigious— Living.Well Magazine Tried and True award is given only awarded to products and companies that we have used and can honestly say they were great! If it has the LWM Tried and True Award on it, we are sure that you will too.

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Recipes: Leon Happy Salads by Jane Baxter & John Vincent

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38 August 2016

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The Importance of Exercise for the Aging Brain

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How Much Exercise is Needed to Make a Difference in the Brain?

As people age, some regions of the brain begin to shrink. Studies show the hippocampus shrinks one to two percent annually in people without dementia — a loss that is associated with an increased risk for developing cognitive difficulties. This is drawing much interest to the importance of exercise for the aging brain, and how it can alter brain health.

We’ve known for decades that the right kind of exercise burns fat and builds muscles. Recently, a study was published in The Journal of Alzheimer’s Disease, suggests that a moderate exercise regimen in individuals 65 and older can build gray matter. Gray matter consists mostly of neurons and is generally equated with greater brain health!

While exercise has long been linked to better mental capacity in older people, this study was unique in that it included 10 years of data from nearly 900 participants who completed medial and cognitive tests and received M.R.I. brain scans. The participants were at least 65 when they entered the study, which included an estimated number of calories burned through weekly exercise.

The participants in the study engaged in such activities as moderate cycling, gardening, walking, jogging, and ballroom dancing as part of their lifestyle regimen. Among the participants, the top quartile of active individuals showed substantially more gray matter in the parts of the brain related to memory and high-level thinking. And those whose activity increased over a 5-year period showed notable increases in gray matter.

The benefits of physical exercise, especially aerobic exercise, have positive effects on brain function on multiple fronts, ranging from the molecular to behavioral level. According to a study done by the Department of Exercise Science at the University of Georgia, even briefly exercising for 20 minutes facilitates information processing and memory function.

This is great news considering the global incidence of dementia is estimated to more than triple in the next 35 years due to the swell of aging population and increased life expectancy. If physical conditions permits, moderate aerobic exercise should be a component to every aging individual’s care plan.

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Alternative healthcare (referred to as complementary and alternative medicine or CAM), in which chiropractic is in the forefront, is rapidly growing in use and popularity.

A 2008 National Institutes of Health report states that, “In the United States, approximately 38 percent of adults (about 4 in 10) and approximately 12 percent of children (about 1 in 9) are using some form of CAM.”

How to Talk to Your Primary Care Physician about Alternative Care Dr. Scott E. Rosenthal

I

n the U.S., drug companies spend about $3 billion each year on advertising to consumers. You can’t turn on a TV, go online or open a magazine without seeing a drug advertisement staring you in the face. Despite this massive figure, it pales in comparison to the amount of money that goes toward influencing doctors. In 2012, the pharmaceutical industry spent an estimated $24 billion directly marketing to health care professionals. The enormous advertising investment has paid big pharma huge dividends, with Americans spending $329.2 billion on prescription drugs in 2013. 1 With such a lucrative market, one can reasonably question how the pharmaceutical industry influences those who prescribe their products, and the extent to which it has shaped the American health care environment—especially in light of the fact that less invasive, highly effective alternative care approaches are recommended infrequently or not at all.

Alternative healthcare (referred to as complementary and alternative medicine or CAM), in which chiropractic is in the forefront, is rapidly growing in use and popularity. A 2008 National Institutes of Health report states that, “In the United States, approximately 38 percent of adults (about 4 in 10) and approximately 12 percent of children (about 1 in 9) are using some form of CAM.”2 If you planning to receive alternative care and wish to discuss your decision with your primary care physician, this article will help by teaching you how to best communicate with your doctor.

Please note that doctors are people who have feelings and egos, too. Being mindful, gentle and respectful when communicating

1https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/wonk/wp/2015/02/11/big-pharmaceutical-companies-are-spending-far-more-on-marketing-than-research/

2 https://nccih.nih.gov/sites/nccam.nih.gov/files/camuse.pdf 8

with your doctor can save a cherished and established relationship.

Avoid being confrontational or putting him or her on the defensive. It is more about sharing your desire to understand all available options rather than disagreeing with a recommendation.

The first step is to express your interest in learning about different approaches to your problem, including alternative and natural care. Share that you would like to avoid or lessen medication use, if possible, and that you are willing to make changes and are open to alternative health care. End by saying, “I value your opinion, is it alright if we discuss this now?”

Below is a list of sample questions to ask your doctor in order to explore alternative care options: “What alternative treatments have you seen work with other patients?”

“Have you had other patients make lifestyle changes that prevented the need for this medication?” “If so, what worked for them?”

“Do you have any personal experience with… supplements, exercising, chiropractic, acupuncture, dietary changes, etc.?”

“What would you change in your life if you were me?”

“If you were facing the same problem, would you try to avoid surgery and/or medication?” If so, “what would you do?”

Keep in mind that it is possible your doctor may not be familiar with alternative care. Some may even oppose any approach that steps outside of the typical medical box of tools. Hopefully, those doctors will at least respect the choices that you make for your health. At first, you may need to be patient and allow your experience with alternative care to help educate them. I

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August 2016

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have seen many doctors through the years change their view from this very scenario.

Others who would not recommend care initially developed a better understanding and acceptance once they saw our mutual patients’ success with chiropractic. Now many of them refer patients. On occasion, I will have a patient ask me to recommend a new doctor for him or her who is open to alternative approaches.

Many people seek alternative care without the consent or knowledge of their other doctors.

And that is perfectly fine. But I do feel the patient is best served in a team atmosphere.

Unless the person requests otherwise, I send a report to each patient’s primary care doctor and am always open to talking to another doctor when needed.

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With so many Americans seeking alternative modes of care, it’s likely that a friend or family member will recommend that you see their chiropractor, massage therapist, acupuncturist, or other provider at some point. By communicating in a thoughtful and respectful way, you can maintain a caring and open relationship with your primary care physician while exploring these other options. You may even be surprised to find them sitting in your chiropractor’s reception room one day!

Dr. Scott E. Rosenthal is a secondgeneration Doctor of Chiropractic and a past president of the Delaware Chiropractic Society.

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V

ALENTINO!

Caricature created by: Liam McWilliams

Enter: Where’s Valentino Contest Find Answers Here

W

ow! There are thousands of readers who are searching for Valentino. He is hidden somewhere on the pages of each issue. The entries keep pouring in.

We hope you have fun looking and will continue your quest to find Valentino. When you find him please email us at: info@livingwellmagazine.net [Please type “Valentino” on the subject line or scan the QR Code below]. — keep searching and entering the “Where’s Valentino!” Contest every month for a chance to be entered to win some great gifts, subscriptions, T-shirts, mugs, cookbooks, books, videos, etc. Or enter on our Be the 10th Facebook page www.facebook.com/ person to report finding Valentino and you LWMlivingwellmagazine (be sure will receive a copy (HOT OFF to inbox us so you aren’t sharing his THE PRESS) of LEON HAPPY location with everyone), and be sure SALADS by Jane Baxter & John to like the page first. Please remember Vincent. See this month’s to share our page with your friends! recipes for three recipes from Below Is The Answer To Last this fresh & fabulous book.

Month’s Where’s Valentino!

Thank you for finding Valentino! We had a record amount of entries this month and we will be sending out more prizes. Too easy? His ninja skills get sharper when the weather gets warmer. Please make sure we have your mailing address. Because if you are a winner we can sent out your prize! For those of you who are still looking for Valentino, he was on page p7 “Trilogy Salon & Spa” smelling the flowers. When you find Valentino, send us an email at: Info@ AHEEEHAPJDDNJKOMMCOONMLGGKDPBDDIFMLKIILIBPAHEEEHA BNFFFNBPNHMLAHBCEGFKAOAHFHADBPJOBCICACIONPBNFFFNB NHCDMGFPMPENGLFIPCGBDBBADAGNDKIOMKMJKCPMPIJMOKGDL livingwellmagazine.net (be sure to put CHOBIFFGCDMEFJNPAAACCBBBCDKCGPMBIKPAFKLNGHEDKCFPD KCNDLOFEHPAGDJHHICJIKEGHKINGCKGEBKLBKHFLBBOFHKHMA BFKLANFMBJEHIEOJBMMEOHANENBEKOMLKLPHHBJNAMFNAJDBL Valentino or Where’s Valentino in the DLKIMFFBAOGLJECDFBMPEMENNFILACIIMPNKIEHLMJJJMMMHH HGLCCFFJJHIHEMOIJCADNKMBNMABKOODHABKOFNKOMEJPABPB subject line or just scan the QR Code BDDMAIFOBCBBKBMFMLOJBANAOJLHHGIGIONFKLPMHPOJGOMMG DEOGDFFOHBFKFGHBFLKNLPIMAFNONDMHKAHHHIBFIFHLDHFPC EFFNNNEHKJHLFBOOHFEOCAAHFHACILHDDCKNKKFMAHFHAOLNJ with your smart phone and it will take you APBBBPAPIBBENPELBCBGPGAAEBEEDIBOOGPPKDPMCAFBAMMPH HHHHHHHPPHHHPHPPPPHHPPHHPHHPPHHHPHHHHHHPPPPPPHHHH directly to an email addressed and ready to go, all you have to do is tell us where he is.

After we receive your entry, a brief survey is sent back to you, please fill it out if you haven’t already. It is for LWM only and will never be shared.

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Current Research in Acupuncture Dr. Kelly Brown

One in four people suffer from some type of chronic pain.

Medications for chronic pain, specifically opioids, have gotten a lot of attention lately with the side effects, risks, and possibility of addiction. The Centers for Disease Control (CDC) recently published opioid prescribing guidelines for medical professionals.

The first of these guidelines states, “Nonpharmacologic therapy and nonopioid pharmacologic therapy are preferred for chronic pain,” 1. Suggested therapies include acupuncture, chiropractic, and massage.

Current Research in Acupuncture Recently, a review of acupuncture research was published by the Acupuncture Now Foundation (ANF). The paper is titled: “Acupuncture: More than Pain Management.” Chronic pain was one topic this paper addresses, other topics include depression, infertility, and seasonal allergies.

Acupuncture and Pain Any pain in Chinese medicine is considered stagnation of Qi, a vital substance that runs through the body and channels. Consider traffic on I-95. On a normal day, with no accidents everyone moves smoothly. However, if there is an accident, there are delays with moving the accident, waiting for ambulances, police officers, and/or tow trucks. Plus, there are delays with people looking at the accident. Generally, past the accident there is a smooth traffic flow. The back-up leading up to it grows until the accident is cleared and normal flow is returned. The incident causing pain in this analogy is the accident and acupuncture’s effect on the

1 Dowell, Haegerich, Chou, 2016 12

normal flow of Qi is the emergency workers clearing the accident.

Therefore, acupuncture is effective at removing the blockage and promoting a normal flow of Qi, improving circulation, and decreasing pain. For chronic pain, needles are usually placed in the area of pain and above and below the area to support proper Qi and blood flow in the area. The ANF paper states, “Out of all of these non-drug therapies, only acupuncture has been shown through extensive animal research to actually stimulate the production of ‘endogenous opiods’ - the body’s own natural opiate-like substances...and therefore provide an important alternative to synthetic opioids,”2 This is exciting information for chronic pain sufferers!

Acupuncture is helping the brain to perceive less pain without medication. Additionally, acupuncture has an anti-inflammatory effect that is helpful in treating chronic pain, as well as other inflammatory disorders.

Acupuncture and Depression Current research on mental health is finding depression is an inflammatory process in the brain. Studies on acupuncture’s effects on depression have shown promising changes in the body and brain. Acupuncture research shows reversal of depressive symptoms with acupuncture that are similar to antidepressant medications. One study showed “acupuncture had antidepressantlike effects, and its mechanism of action appeared to involve the inhibition of pro-inflammatory cytokines,”3 It can also improve 2 Bauer, Koppelman, 2016, p. 4 3 Bauer, Koppelman, 2016, p. 6

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symptoms associated with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

Some Veteran’s Affairs facilities offer acupuncture for both pain relief and depression symptoms.

Acupuncture and Infertility Acupuncture’s effects on infertility have been studied most recently in conjunction with assisted reproduction therapy (ART). One study had two groups, one received acupuncture and ART, and one only received ART. In the group with both treatments, successful pregnancy was documented in 42.5%.

The group that did not receive acupuncture documented 26.3% successful pregnancy. In a research review for acupuncture and female reproduction, “acupuncture was shown to regulate uterine and ovarian blood flow (OBF), which can encourage a thicker uterine wall and improve embryo implantation,”4 Acupuncture is also safe during pregnancy to reduce symptoms, such as morning sickness, headaches, and fatigue.

Male infertility can also be helped with acupuncture. “In a recent animal study, electro-acupuncture was found to enhance germ cell proliferation…and may restore normal semen parameters in subfertile patients,”5 . Points are usually located on the abdomen arms and legs with fertility treatments for both men and women.

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All of the above conditions are able to be treated with acupuncture.

There are many more complaints that respond favorably to this therapy. If you wonder whether acupuncture can help you, schedule an appointment with an acupuncturist today!

SMALL GATHERINGS TO LARGE WEDDINGS

Works Cited: Bauer,M., L.Ac., & Koppelman, M.H., MSc. (2016). Acupuncture: More than pain management. Retrieved June 14, 2016, from https://acupuncturenowfoundation.org/ whitepaper/ Dowell D, Haegerich TM, Chou R. (2016) CDC Guidline for prescribing opiods for chronic pain – United States. Retrieved July 12, 2016, from https://www.cdc. gov>drugoverdose>pdf To read the full ANF White Papers you can go to https://acupuncturenowfoundation. org/whitepaper/ . Navigate the site and learn more!

Dr. Kelly Brown is a chiropractor and acupuncturist with Pure Wellness. She received both a Doctorate in Chiropractic and a Masters in Acupuncture from New York Chiropractic College in Seneca Falls, NY. Dr. Brown is a life-long resident of DE and is glad to be back in the area serving the community. You can contact her at the office 302.365.5470 or through the website www.purewellchiro.

4 Bauer, Koppelman, 2016, p. 5 5 Bauer, Koppelman, 2016, p. 5

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August 2016

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August 2016

Q:

How common is hearing loss in dogs?

My Corgi just turned 10 years old and it seems that sometimes he’s ignoring me when I call him. Is this a real problem in veterinary medicine?

A:

losing their hearing. Sometimes they will bark excessively or make strange vocal sounds in an effort to hear themselves. Additionally, these dogs seem to get startled if they are touched when asleep because they cannot hear their person approaching. It is often helpful to make a vibration when approaching a deaf dog so they “feel” you coming towards them. I recommend banging your feet or hand on the floor or table when arriving home to give your pet a heads up that you’ve arrived. Some of these dogs can be taught Hearing loss (deafness) can be congenital. It can be unilateral signals / hand motions to try to communicate better. (one side) or bilateral (both ears). It is prevalent in over eighty dog breeds that we know of. Some of the higher risk breeds The official way to diagnose hearing loss in the canine is to measure include Cocker Spaniel, Dalmatian, Collie, Bulldog, Samoyed, the brain’s electrical activity to different sounds. The test is called Harlequin Great Danes, Old English Sheep Dog, Beagle and the Brainstem Auditory Evoked Response (BAER). This type Greyhound, just to name a few. of equipment is not often found in a general veterinary practice.

To answer quickly, yes, dogs can go deaf. The ear is separated into three parts, the outer ear, the middle ear and the inner ear. Through a series of mechanisms, sound is converted to fluid waves. A nerve impulse is generated and travels to the brainstem for perception of sound. When this pathway is damaged the dog experiences a loss of sensitivity to sound.

Deafness can also be acquired. The normal aging process tends to affect hearing. A physical injury to the ear(s) is another possibility that can cause temporary or permanent hearing loss.

Ear infections can also get so bad and become a chronic problem and cause a number of issues. Hearing loss from noise occurs as well. It is dependent on the intensity and duration of the noise.

Noise is measured in decibels. As an example, a vacuum cleaner is about 70 decibels, while the noise at a concert can be 125 decibels. As a general rule, long term exposure above 85 decibels can cause hearing loss. Short term exposure above 120 decibels can also cause deafness. Unfortunately, some ear medications have been known to cause toxic effects on the ear drum and can cause deafness. Sometimes this is temporary and sometimes it is not.

Many of the symptoms that are seen by pet caretakers involve their behavior. Often times one of the first symptoms observed is the lack of response or a slow response to being called by name. When people notice this they may try clapping their hands or ringing the doorbell to get a response. A dog that normally gets excited and anxious during thunderstorms or the loud noises from 4th of July fireworks, and then doesn’t respond that way any longer, may be

More often than not, this test would be done in a University or Veterinary Specialty Center setting. It is a non-invasive test and most pets have no problem during the fifteen or so minutes that the test takes. Very small electrodes are placed on the head just under the skin. Earphones are placed over the pet’s ears. Sounds are produced by a specialized computer that can determine the hearing ability of the patient.

Ear infections, under certain conditions, can result in partial or total hearing loss. Therefore, it is imperative to address your pet’s ear problems as soon as you notice something is wrong. Odor, discharge or redness are prime examples of situations when you need to get to the veterinarian. Waiting could result in chronic ear problems the entire life of your pet. So do the right thing and check your pet’s ears on a regular basis so that you can address the problem as soon as it occurs.

www.livingwellmagazine.net

Dr. Rose DiLeva is a 1987 graduate of the University of Pennsylvania’s school of Veterinary Medicine. She practices alternative and conventional veterinary medicine. Dr. DiLeva is a certified veterinary acupuncturist and a certified veterinary chiropractitioner. She can be reached at her Animal Wellness Center in Chadds Ford, Pa. at 610-558-1616 for appointments and telephone consultations.

Her web site is www.altpetdoc.com and www.drrosesremedies.com August 2016

15

HOW ARE ENVIRONMENTALISTS USING VIRTUAL REALITY ?

Virtual Reality (VR) is no doubt the hottest thing in electronics and entertainment today, with “immersive” 360-degree experiences increasingly available via the click of a mouse or tap of a screen. And while it’s hardly a replacement for getting out into nature and experiencing life itself, environmental advocates are starting to use VR as a tool to help everyday people appreciate the natural world around them and the environmental challenges we face as global citizens.

One of this trend’s leading lights is Stanford University’s Virtual Human Interaction Lab (VHIL), which works to “design, test and distribute virtual reality interventions that teach the concept of empathy.”

“Virtual reality can give everyone, regardless of where they live, the kind of experience needed to generate the urgency required to prevent environmental calamity,” Stanford professor Jeremy Bailenson told Yale Environment 360. “One of the greatest challenges to staving off irrevocable climate change isn’t simply getting buy-in from skeptical politicians—it’s getting people to visualize how driving a gas-guzzling car or living in an energy inefficient home is contributing to a problem that may only manifest itself completely in future decades.” Earlier this year the lab unveiled a short VR documentary and interactive VR game to help explain ocean acidification, a slow-motion and hard-toexplain process whereby excess carbon dioxide in the atmosphere dissolves in the ocean, upping acidity levels and altering marine habitats accordingly.

Google Expeditions, a VR educational program from the Internet giant, has shared sections of VHIL’s ocean acidification documentary with over a million school children around the world as part of its beta release, and will likely reach many more as the program is rolled out to new audiences in coming months.

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One of VHIL’s earlier experiments asked participants to either read a description of the experience of cutting down a tree, or to chop down a virtual tree using VR. “In following tests, those that took part in the VR simulation reduced their usage of paper products by 20 percent in comparison to those who did not,” reports the Triple Pundit blog. “In another experiment, test subjects were asked to virtually eat coal while bathing in order to fully understand the amount of resources they require to enjoy a hot shower.”

Yale Environment 360 reports that VR is also now being used more often in academic circles and to support policy initiatives, such as to create 3D representations of pollution or other human impacts.

Not to be outdone, famed nature filmmaker David Attenborough has kicked off a new series of VR nature films by documenting a recent dive expedition into Australia’s Great Barrier Reef in VR. Attenborough hopes to spark interest in protecting nature and wildlife by producing and distributing VR experiences that entertain and educate viewers through immersing them in some of the world’s most iconic environments.

Given the popularity of VR and the increasingly lower costs of producing content, we can expect to see many more immersive experiences to stir up enthusiasm for reducing our environmental impact and protecting vanishing nature and wildlife.

CONTACTS: VHIL, vhil.stanford.edu; Yale Environment 360, e360.yale.edu; Triple Pundit, www.triplepundit.com.

EarthTalk® is produced by Roddy Scheer & Doug Moss and is a registered trademark of the nonprofit Earth Action Network. To donate, visit www.earthtalk. org. Send questions to: question@earthtalk.org.

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August 2016

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—

Firmness, Fire and Focus Suzanne Eder

In order to relax into the flow of our lives, we first have to get in the flow.

frustrated or worried or confused. We get lost. We get stuck. We hit roadblocks. Rather than being in the flow, we tread water. Or we get caught in a cross-current that’s not going in the direction we want to go. Or we simply float, adrift on a sea of conflicting priorities.

The great promise in following our dreams is that in doing so, we come into alignment with who we really are. We literally get in the flow of our own lives and start experiencing, more and more, the inspired thoughts, unexpected opportunities, supportive people and delightful synchronicities that affirm for us the “rightness” of our path.

The idea of relaxing into the journey seems ridiculous at times like that. And from a certain perspective it is ridiculous. In order to relax into the flow of our lives, led by our longings, we have to actually get in the flow. And while the “getting” doesn’t require work or struggle, it does require focus. And shifting focus may require a teensy bit of effort, depending on how absorbed we may have become in thoughts that distract us from what we want.

Rather than trying to make things happen, we learn to follow the trail set by our dreams, our successes, our energy and our impulses. We relax into the journey and allow wonderful things into our experience.

As the promise is fulfilled, we live in a state of being we call Grace.

Did you notice that I said “thoughts that distract us” rather than “things that distract us”? That was intentional. And it’s good news.

Because while we may think that it’s the stuff of life that gets in the way of following our dreams, it’s actually how we’re thinking that gets in the way.

And yet...the promised fulfillment rarely occurs in a straight line, as most of us have discovered. Sometimes we get distracted or

Our thinking directs the choices we make, what we attract into our lives and how we interpret the circumstances we’re in. We can

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think in ways that empower our dreams or we can think in ways that diminish them.

Do not invest in that story. Refocus on the deeper truth: What you want is a one-of-a-kind expression of who

I know you already know this. Yet most of us benefit from being reminded of it, again and again. Just as there is no such thing as too much love, there is no such thing as too much support in learning to sustain our focus on our dreams.

you are. Your dreams or impulses or longings are your guidance, calling you in the direction of growth and aliveness. You have what it takes because you ARE what it takes. Learning to love yourself each step of the way is the power and the promise.

A while ago I was in one of those odd, out-of-flow places. At first it felt like a welcome respite after a period of intense activity which it was - but as the momentum of my life got slower and slower I started to feel adrift. It was almost as if an undercurrent was pulling me away from shore - away from what I wanted - and I felt powerless to stop it.

Of course you will need to pause along the way, to rest and replenish and regroup. You will need to stay connected with your evolving desires and let go of the ones that no longer light you up.

You will need to feel your way through worry and confusion and frustration. There will be ebbs and flows and periods of stillness.

You won’t always be “on fire.”

I watched quietly as my dreams drifted further and further from view. Old thoughts floated into my awareness that I hadn’t courted in a while. Thoughts such as, “I just don’t have what it takes” and “I’ve been deluding myself in thinking I can actually live my dreams” and “It’s no wonder nothing is working, I’ve made such bad decisions.”

But there is a big difference between giving in to a need for rest and giving up on your dreams. There is a big difference between being loving and being lax. There is a big difference between being in the flow and being adrift.

To put it mildly, those thoughts weren’t helpful.

And to put it clearly, those thoughts were the undercurrent that was pulling me away from my dreams. What had started out as the natural ebb phase of an ebb-and-flow cycle had been distorted - by my judgmental thoughts - into an extended period of stagnation.

In your heart of hearts you know the difference, and that makes all the difference in the world. Stay close to your heart of hearts, no matter what. Be firm about that. Be loving. Be persistent.

Keep the fire burning.

As I reflected on those thoughts in my journal one morning, I finally remembered to “give the pen” to my wise inner Self and see what she had to say about where I was. She was very clear in her response: I had to develop firmness, fire and focus. I had allowed my attention to soften to the point of dissipation, and it was time to bring it into focus. I had to, firmly but lovingly, find a way to reconnect with what I wanted and sustain my focus on it until my energy was reignited.

That was the moment I realized that before I could “let go” to the flow of my life, I had to get in it. And in order to get in it, I had to make two distinct yet related choices: The choice to not invest my attention in the thoughts that diminished or confused me The choice to invest my attention in loving thoughts about who I am and what I want It’s a choice we’ll be called to make, again and again. It gets easier over time, to be sure, and yet there might be occasions when it suddenly feels as if we’re back at square one. Damning thoughts of failure, resignation or “not-enoughness” might show up long after we thought we’d let them go. It’s tempting to feel discouraged at times like that, but the feeling of discouragement is only a result of the story that we’re telling ourselves: the story of having taken two steps forward and three steps back, the story of going nowhere, the story of having to start all over again. www.livingwellmagazine.net

Suzanne Eder is an award-winning writer, teacher and transformational life coach. She started her professional career as a CPA and enjoyed a highly successful corporate career in both Finance and Human Resources. She is a graduate of the Barbara Brennan School of Healing’s intensive four-year program in mind-body-spirit healing, and was also a fitness instructor for 16 years. She founded Solid Ground Transformational Life Coaching in 2003 to help others awaken to their magnificence and create lives that light them up. Her first book, 10 Ways To Find Peace Rather Than Panic (When The World Has Gone A Little Crazy), earned a full 5-star rating on Amazon. Through her writing, retreats, classes and private mentoring she offers inspired and practical counsel in all areas related to personal growth and transformation. Suzanne can be reached at see@mysolidground.com or 302-888-2138.

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Desperately Seeking Pokémon

You don’t have to be “Tech Addicted” to jump on board the new Pokémon craze. This is my first experience with hunting Pokémon, other than the hundreds of dollars spent in the past on trading cards and video games for my children. I didn’t understand the craze then, but I might now. Since Pokémon Go’s release in July 2016, the game has reportedly been downloaded 15 million times by people of all ages and in all walks of life, including all of us at LWM. Now imagine 15 million people taking to the streets, literally, looking for, and hoping to find 151 possible Pokémon. Finally, our children’s generation is able to become the very best Pokémon trainers.

their phones, not that that’s anything new. This game requires a level of common sense, that users have been throwing to the wind or in some cases, someone has taken advantage of someone lack of common sense. This game doesn’t share your personal location with other users, but it encourages people to congregate in certain areas. Use your head and don’t blindly follow a Pikachu into the middle of the street, the very best Pokémon trainers look both way. These are inherent concerns of using augmented reality, with Pokémon Go, augmented reality has become a main stream phenomenon, our future is looking augmented.

“Get up, Get out, and explore.”

The effect of Pokémon Go’s massive popularity will be a turning point for the augmented reality type technology.

Every company is going to want to try and replicate this magic formula that has been created. Therefore, I encourage everyone to download the game, just to try it out because Pokémon Go just changed the game.

Using your phones GPS, users are given an ‘augmented reality’ experience, where the digital world meets the physical one.

Based on your location different kinds of Pokémon may be lurking nearby. When you find a Pokémon, just throw a Poké ball, and capture the Pokémon that appears on your phone.

(As you can see in the picture above, Pokémon can show up anywhere, even on our Great Dane, Calvin.

There is a disclaimer that is shown to the user warning them to be aware of their surroundings, but like most disclaimers, it goes in one year and out the other. The problem with that is that people aren’t paying attention to anything other than 24

Written by LWM Staff

Niantic, Inc. ©2016 Pokémon. ©1995–2016 Nintendo / Creatures Inc. / GAME FREAK Inc. Pokémon and Pokémon character names are trademarks of Nintendo. The Google Maps Pin is a trademark of Google Inc. and the trade dress in the product design is a trademark of Google Inc. under license to The Pokémon Company

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August 2016

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Rate Your Mental State Karen Verna Carlson

“Depending on our mood, we experience the identical circumstances—who we are married to, where we work, the car we drive, our potential, our childhood—entirely differently.”

—Richard Carlson From: Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff…and it’s all small stuff (MJF Books, NY 10001, 1997).

Mood swings are a fact of life for everyone. Given the increasing scientific evidence that mind and body are interactive I have found the daily practice of rating my mental state helpful and healthful for life management. This is another mindful exercise in self awareness, a fundamental quality that elevates Homo sapiens from the rest of the animal kingdom. This practice pays huge dividends for my quality of life, so I will share my process for you to use. But first let me elaborate on some benefits of engaging a mood rating system.

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Become More Peaceful The late Richard Carlson 20 years ago wrote 100 stress reducing strategies in his little book (cited above) titled after a quote from Dr. Wayne Dyer. Becoming a more peaceful person is the organizing theme. “One of the reasons so many of us remain hurried, frightened, and competitive, and continue to live life as if it were one giant emergency,” writes Carlson, “is our fear that if we were to become more peaceful and loving, we would suddenly stop achieving our goals. We would become lazy and apathetic.

Become More Successful “You can put this fear to rest by realizing the opposite is actually true. Fearful, frantic thinking takes an enormous amount of energy and drains the creativity and motivation from our lives.

When you are fearful or frantic, you literally immobilize yourself from your greatest potential, not to mention enjoyment. Any success that you do have is despite your fear, not because of it,” he states.

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Expand Your Vocabulary

Rate Your State

Mood disorders affected both my parents and have been an ongoing challenge in my own life. I have learned greater self awareness by creating a one to ten scale to describe my emotional state at any moment. How are you feeling right now? Most people have a vocabulary limited to variations of the two extremes, “good” or “bad,” or of the vague middle, “okay” or “pretty good.”

My 10-scale helps me become conscious of my moods before they snowball out of control. Creating a personal hierarchy of mood states has an immediate benefit of softening the feelings emanating from a negative state or of deepening the feelings from a positive mood. This classification process using numbers facilitates a little detachment from my emotions without suppressing or denying them. As I practice rating my state, I witness a continuous loop of change that reinforces a realistic perspective. Good moods come and go. Bad moods come and go. Some visit longer than others, but they all change. The result is that I am better at accepting my moods and at fashioning good days or good parts of days when I’m feeling low. When I’m feeling ebullient I am better at enjoying that state unencumbered by fearing its loss.

Moods Are Deceptive Author Carlson elaborates, “Your own moods can be extremely deceptive. They can, and probably do, trick you into believing your life is far worse than it really is. When you’re in a good mood, life looks great. You have perspective, common sense, and wisdom. In good moods, things don’t feel so hard, problems seem less formidable and easier to solve. When you’re in a good mood, relationships seem to flow and communication is easy. If you are criticized, you take it in stride.

“On the contrary, when you’re in a bad mood, life looks unbearably serious and difficult. You have very little perspective. You take things personally and often misinterpret those around you, as you impute malignant motives into their actions.

Moods Skew Perspective “Here’s the catch: People don’t realize their moods are always on the run. They think instead that their lives have suddenly become worse in the past day or even the last hour. So, someone who is in a good mood in the morning might love his wife, his job and his car. He is probably optimistic about his future and feels grateful about his past. But by late afternoon, if his mood is bad, he claims he hates his job, thinks of his wife as a nuisance, thinks his car is a junker, and believes he is going nowhere in his career. If you ask him about his childhood while he’s in a low mood, he’ll probably tell you it was extremely difficult….

A Human Condition “Such quick and drastic contrasts may seem absurd, even funny— but we’re all like that,” reminds Carlson. “In low moods we lose our perspective and everything seems urgent. We completely forget that when we are in a good mood, everything seems so much better….When we are low, rather than blaming our mood as would be appropriate, we instead tend to feel that our whole life is wrong. It’s almost as if we actually believe that our lives have fallen apart in the past hour or two.

Time Heals Moods “The truth is, life is almost never as bad as it seems when you’re in a low mood. Rather than staying stuck in a bad temper convinced you are seeing life realistically, you can learn to question your judgment….” Carlson suggests, “When you’re in an ill mood, learn to pass it off as simply as that: an unavoidable human condition that will pass with time.”

Levels 10, 9, 8 and 7 Level 10 represents the best functional mood I can imagine. I honestly admit to never having experienced a genuine #10. Nine level mood is also a fantasy on my version of this type of scale, and represents the state that I call “being in the zone.” Everything flows smoothly from one uplifting experience to the next.

Everybody experiences the glory of win/win benefits. Eight level moods are always positive, gently instructive, ebullient, and rare.

Seven is a level that characterizes about 5% of my moods, and I’m endeavoring to increase that percentage. A category seven mood is when I feel pretty calm, competent and resourced. Number seven mood days always have enough time, enough money, enough good food, enough work and enough play.

Levels 6, 5 and 4 When I experience a #6 mood level, I feel called to pump up a few buoyant affirmations or to apply the principle of conscious acceptance of my mood and gently work within it without trying to directly change it. At #5, I have to work to stay positively engaged with life and bring forth as many authentically uplifting thoughts as I can. Days or hours when I feel in a level #4 state, I’m struggling to function with civility. I relate to Richard Carlson’s assessment, “When we are immobilized by little things—when we are irritated, annoyed, and easily bothered—our (over-)reactions not only make us frustrated but actually get in the way of getting what we want. We lose sight of the bigger picture, focus on the negative, and annoy other people who might otherwise help us.”

Darker States Level #3 is the mood in which I most often awaken. That’s why the glass walled sunroom is my bedroom—so I can use the beautiful arrival of daylight to my yard and woods beyond to help me pivot into gratitude for the natural beauty and serenity I am blessed to behold every morning. This #3 state is heavy with a sense of relentless responsibility, obligation, drear and drudgery. I treat myself kindly by lightening my schedule, reading inspirational literature, and/or temporarily postponing activities that feel too

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challenging. Self kindness often includes engaging in productive physical exertion, and/or chatting honestly about my feelings with a friend on the phone or in person.

Prevent Accidents A lower state shifts my priorities to simple survival. I just focus on endurance. This is the state when accidents are most likely to happen because I’m too morose to be paying attention. At level #2 I postpone commitments whenever possible without inconveniencing anyone, and just stay in bed reading, meditating, and journaling. Fortunately, that’s my lowest state. Decades ago I would occasionally sink to a #1 level where I’d lay in bed for an entire day or two filled with snowballing thoughts of hopelessness and despair and failure. Each episode always passed, morphing into another mood.

Create Your Scale My friends have adapted their own 1-10 scales to rate their moods. Specific mood data really aids communication and a sense of connection between friends and family. Rating my state and hearing how others rate theirs helps each of us to own and release bad moods as well as release any temptation to desperately try to hang onto good ones.

Start Now Author Carlson encourages us to “Put your attention on the fact that life is precious and extraordinary. Then little ordinary things take on a whole new meaning.” I second the motion.

Rating my state as a daily practice keeps me moving in a healthy direction. Start now; rate your state at this very moment. It is a life enhancing practice.

Karen Verna Carlson, N.D., Ph.D. (Hon.) is a naturopathic physician and professor credited with “the first major breakthrough in Swedish Massage—research demonstrating energetic interconnections”—since Peter Ling systemized it in the early 19th century. After 35 years running her own nationally accredited school of holistic healing and massage she has retired to provide a new kind of holistic care for individuals and families. In addition to her specialties of healing massage and bodywork, she provides sensitive, timeand cost-effective services for home or office, family members and staff, that include diverse holistic problem solving for garden, pets, children and elders.

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HANDS ON HEALTH by: Ann Wilkinson P.T.M.S,

Q:

The thought of getting on a horse or getting in the water for treatment is intriguing. How would either of these techniques help someone in chronic pain?

A:

In this day and age incorporating nature back into our lives has its own therapeutic effects and can be more far reaching than we can imagine. Using the horse and water certainly present themselves with a whole unique set of offerings as they alone can offer great effect. When someone is in chronic pain, the energetic field of the horse or the oxygen rolling off of the moving water, offer relaxation properties. Dynamically, both mediums provide three dimensional intervention experience where as the table is fairly one dimensional. The water offers a buoyancy and the ability to move the limbs in many planes, the spine as well. The weight of the limb is distributed in the water giving the therapist the ability to support the limb very well while moving it in directions that would be to difficult without the buoyancy factor. The horse allows me to get my patients into positions (using uphill and/or downhill) requires a recruitment of the pelvic floor by the patient in a subtle and natural way. The rhythmic motion of the horse allows for small muscle strengthening and often mobilizes joints that were locked by spasm. A relaxation occurs on such a deep level that motivation and hope and intention can all find a space, a place to present. The shut down, lock down, immobilization pattern gets debunked.

Q:

I have all the symptoms of carpaltunnel syndrome yet my EMG is negative and all blood work is normal. I take no medications. What else could be going on?

dermatome (the area innervated by the associated nerve with that organ) can be triggered. Considering the intricacy of the nerve innervation to the lungs and the pleura ( connective tissue lining the lung) and all the associated muscles of respiration and posture, it is clear that the irritation and adherence of this tissue can create far reaching restriction. When the tissues associated with the lungs are in a shut down mode, the upper extremities are very vulnerable. First, the forward head and collapsed chest posture puts unnecessary compression on the nerves exiting the cervical spine as they branch out towards the periphery and into the shoulder girdle. Here there is a potential of a sheering force on the upper cervical nerves caused by the head forward and also at the base C7-T1 as the entire neck slides forward on the trunk.

Shallow breathing is a side affect from this type of restriction that causes it own negative neurological influence as well. Shallow breathing makes the brain respond as though there is not enough oxygen and causes a hyperventilation cycle, further shut down and more ingrained tightness. Sensations of numbness, pain and weakness will radiate from the area of dysfunction as well as the areas of collapse. In the case of pneumonia as it relates to carpaltunnel syndrome is as follows: Scar tissue forms around the lungs, surrounding intercostal ( between the ribs) and other muscles of respiration and posture such as the abdominal mm., pectoral mm., start to splint and protect. The head is drawn forward as well the rib cage by the tightness. Breathing becomes more difficult and the respiration rate increases. A cycle is self perpetuating of rapid breathing, forward head and poor posture and finally nerve compression and irritation. When symptoms turn into numbness, the subscapularis, scalene muscles and sternocleidomastoid mm. are all involved and must be treated.

There are layers and they must be peeled back to the beginning.

In this case, the final treatment must address the lungs in order to prevent reoccurrence.

A:

In osteopathy, one of the first places you are instructed to look in the case of carpaltunnel syndrome is to the lungs. It is often noted that if someone has a history of pneumonia they have an increased likelihood to have carpaltunnel syndrome symptoms at some time in the future. Many times, there can be a problem with the viscera (organs) and the musculoskeletal system shuts down around the organ as a way to splint or protect the organ from further damage. Not only are the muscles closest to the organ involved, recruitment of muscles along the www.livingwellmagazine.net

Ann is an award winning writer,teacher and speaker. Ann is the personal body worker of Her Holiness “Sai Maa�. Ann practices osteopathic physical therapy. Ann is also an expert on the use of healing foods, homeopathic and herbal consultations, and therapeutic horseback riding. Ann treats her patients in a beautiful country setting which enables her to utilize all of her learned skills as well as some of the healing properties that only Mother Earth can bestow. Ann is available by appointment. Book online at www.handsonhealthde.com. The farm is also available for birthday parties, women’s circles, and retreats.

August 2016

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The Digital World of Sex & Relationships

with Dianna Palimere

The technological advancements interpersonal communications The technological advancements that have been produced that have been produced over with one another at work, in our over the past two decades have led to a fundamental shift the past twoindecades have ledcommunications social lives, and in ourathomes. our interpersonal with one another to a fundamental in our work, inshift our social lives, and in our homes.

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Face-to-face communication has widely been replaced with what is now called Computer-mediated communication (CMC).

In its most basic definition, this is “any human communication that occurs through the use of two or more electronic devices” (McQuail, 2005). With so many electronic devices now at our fingertips, the ways we interact with each other, and the ways we now form relationships are vastly different than even just a few years ago; and it continues to grow and change at a fairly rapid pace.

It’s clear to see just how much our interpersonal communication has changed, if we compare the electronic devices we use today, to what we had available to use in the mid-1990’s. The most obvious shift was when millions of Americans first began to purchase discs to use AOL’s dial-up subscriptions for email and a prepaid amount of “hours of internet use.” For the millennial generation, this is ancient history; which they may or may not have read about in a chapter of a book, in their middle school computer science class.

That is, if they’re still using books…

Computer-mediated communication (CMC) is no longer limited to using email and accessing the internet. It’s become so pervasive, that it now dominates the way we communicate and interact with others in multiple forms and different devices, personally and professionally, throughout the day, every day. The speed at which Tech companies are inventing and distributing new devices with new forms of CMC has become so swift, that it’s getting more and more difficult to keep up with them. Faceto-face interactions have been replaced with: email, chatrooms, dating websites, webcams, Voice-over-Internet Protocol (VoIP) transmissions (e.g., Skype, which is used to make video/audio calls using webcams), smartphones, text messages, multiple forms of social media, and phone applications for just about anything and everything one can think of!

In just one decade, between 2004 and 2014, new and different forms of social media began to saturate our everyday lives, many of which eventually became household names. These include: Livejournal, Wikipedia, MySpace, flickr, YouTube, Reddit, Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, WhatsApp, Snapchat, Tinder, Vine, and Pheed. In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if the list just mentioned is incomplete and/or outdated by the time this article leaves my hands and goes to print—and these are just the forms of “social” media communications; although several of them do crossover into dating and relationships.

The list of options for online dating/escort services, dating/ relationship websites, and Apps for sex, dating and/or relationships is enumerable and consistently expanding. In addition, they have become more and more specialized to cater to the wants and needs of specific populations. It’s fairly safe to say that anyone who might be new or returning to the “dating scene” is likely going to need some help as they begin to navigate the brave new world of sex and relationships in the digital world.

Where to start?

The first question you need to ask yourself is, “What type of relationship or interaction am I looking for?” This can be essentially broken down to several options. “Not Sure” “The Perfect Match” “Sex” or a “New Friend” This is a bit oversimplified, as there are so many additional options now; nevertheless it’s a great place to start.

It’s of note that most online dating websites now have accompanying phone Apps to use. Wikipedia has a webpage called “Comparison of Online Dating Websites” https://en.wikipedia. org/wiki/Comparison_of_online_dating_websites, as it also includes some of the most widely used Apps as well. Disclaimer: Despite its name, the website “Adult Friend Finder” is NOT a place for adults just looking to make new friends (Wikipedia doesn’t give the best description of that one on their comparison chart…). It falls squarely in the category of “Just looking for sex” and it caters to both singles and swingers. (“No judgements here”) Due to the nature of the profile pictures some its members choose to use, it is also not safe to view while at work or around anyone under the age of 18.

Before You Create a Profile…

Once you’ve decided which website(s) you think best match your needs, you’ll need to do a few things in preparation, before signing up and creating your actual profile.

Create an email address that is only going to be used for your online dating and make sure that it doesn’t contain any identifiable information (like your legal name). The majority of the people you meet will likely be harmless, but there are definitely a few out there that you would not want to have your personal information, and you’ll only figure that out after you’ve spent some time talking with them online. For the same reason, you will also need to create an Instant Messenger account (Kik, Hangouts, etc.) and a VoIP account (Skype, Tox, Slack, Viber, etc.).

At some point, you may want to talk to them on the phone before meeting them in person. I highly suggest using the Google Voice Hangouts App, as it allows you to create a new, free phone number that will automatically forward the calls to your real cell phone number. Just like any other call, you can answer it, let it go to voicemail, or block the sender. In addition, you can also use the app to send/receive text messages.

While you want to be as honest as possible in representing your authentic self to people, you still need to be safe with the information you give them. A nickname is better than your full name (e.g., Bob, instead of Robert). It’s okay to give them your general educational background; I don’t recommend telling them exactly where you went to school or earned your degree. If you have a specialized degree, you may also want to reserve some of

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that kind of information until you feel you have met with the person enough that you feel it would be safe for them to know your personal information. There’s a wonderful article written by Laurie Davis, about “How to Protect Your Privacy When Dating Online.” In it she notes how easy it is to “find” someone’s personal information online, simply by doing a Google search with their first name, job description, and their alma mater.

Be Safe!

Creating a ProfileNow that we have all of the basic safety precautions taken care of, you’re ready to sit down a write a profile. Depending on what kind of relationship you’re looking for, you might put more or less about yourself, your interests, career goals, hobbies, etc. For sake of ease (and because every once in a blue moon my mother decides to read these articles) we’ll create a profile assuming you’re looking for a long-term relationship (LTR) and not a friend with benefits (FWB), or a casual sex partner, “sex buddy,” etc. (Again, no judgments here.

I think she’s finally using “friends with benefits” in the correct context now and doesn’t need any confusion, lol).

Almost all online profiles require the basic demographic information. Naturally, you should be honest about your sex (Male, Female, Trans, Other); Sexual Orientation (L, G, B, T, Q); Age (give or take a year or two); and weight—although many people feel more comfortable sharing their body type, instead of weight in pounds (e.g., height-weight proportionate; curvy; fit; athletic; slim; etc.).

It’s important that you spend some time being thoughtful about what you value most in a partner. Write down all of the “ideal characteristics” you would love to have in a partner, and then prioritize them so that you can describe what matters “the most” to you in a partner. It’s equally as important for you to really know yourself and present yourself authentically. When I’m helping a client write their profile, I encourage them to think of one or two things they are really passionate about; and one or two life experiences that are unique, while still being a fair representation of who they are. For example, one of my clients had gone to a Wolf Preserve & Sanctuary, and went on a midnight tour where they were able to howl with the wolves! I absolutely loved hearing her tell me that story, and it was definitely representative of both her love of nature as well as her adventurous spirit. Moreover, it’s something that would make her profile stand out in the sea of all the others the person might have read that day.

Finally, be very clear about any “deal breakers” you might have.

For example, “Non-smokers only,” or “Must be employed.”

If you have deal breakers that involve appearance, I suggest avoiding expressing it in a negative manner, for example, “Don’t bother messaging me if you’re not employed, physically fit, and educated” Instead, try to include it in with the description of what you do want, and perhaps add a little detail if you don’t want to appear to be shallow. For example, “I’m a highly-educated, 32

athletic, professional, and I’m looking for a woman who is also well-educated, athletic, and a professional. Ideally, I would love for us to be able to go for runs and hikes together.” As a general rule, I tell my clients, “If you wouldn’t walk up to a person in a bar and say it, don’t write it in your profile.”

A few other details… When including photos of yourself, choose ones in which you’re having fun and/or in which you’re looking particular confident. When contacting someone, always mention at least one or two specific details from their profile that you found to be unique/attractive/interesting, etc. And be sure to ask one or two questions about them in your message. This lets them know that you’re thoughtful and genuinely interested in getting to know them.

Best of luck to all of you in your search—don’t forget to have FUN! Additional Resources: Love at First Click: The Ultimate Guide to Online Dating, by Laurie Davis Not Here for Hookups! A Guide to Finding Quality Men on Dating Apps Without Compromising You! by A. J. Nelson A Great Online Dating Profile: 30 Tips to Get Noticed and Get More Responses, by Logan Lo Left Swipes & Love: A Millennial’s Guide to Hookups, Dating, and Tinder, by Amanda Nachman

Sexual Health and Healing with Dianna Palimere, PhD, LCSW Dr. Dianna Palimere is a Psychosexual Therapist and Licensed Clinical Social Worker.

She has been working in the field of mental health for the past 15 years, dedicating the past 12 years to specializing in clinical sexuality. She holds a Bachelors degree in Psychology, a Masters degree in Social Work, a Masters degree in Human Sexuality Education, and a PhD in Clinical Human Sexuality. Utilizing a holistic approach to therapy, she incorporates a variety of clinical interventions in her work with individuals, couples, and families. She is devoted to helping people achieve sexual health and healing through her work as a psychotherapist in her private practice in Pike Creek, DE; as well as in her work with local nonprofit organizations. To learn more about her or to schedule an appointment, visit her website: www.SexTherapyInDelaware.com or email her directly at: dr.palimere@sextherapyindelaware.com Join her on Facebook, keywords: Sex Therapy in Delaware.

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August 2016

Making Sense Of The Mess 7 Keys To Come Out On The Other Side Joe White

Life can be so messy. It is messy with love, money, health, kids, dreams. It can feel like a car wreck that never ends at times. In my 17 years of coaching, I have worked with people in every possible situation helping them to turn their lives around.

In my 49 years on this earth, I can admit my life has at times seemed like a series of crashes. I have never claimed that my life is perfect nor that I have figured life out. That is a myth we can subscribe to. Yes, I have been blessed in my life and very successful at helping people break through their past or limiting patterns, but I like the rest of us, still live my life one day at a time.

I believe that my life challenges is what has laid the foundation of my success as a breakthrough expert. I learn best by making mistakes and growing, even though I must admit, I hate the lessons at the time. We all have felt times of despair when we cannot see the road ahead of us. I can testify that there is the other side. A side where we discover happiness through living more aligned with whom we are and less what we think we should be.

So i will share with you 7 key learnings from my life experiences.

Here are 7 Keys To Come Out On The Other Side.

1 2

. Be grateful for what you have. I know it is hard in the middle of it, but gratitude is the antidote to fear.

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. Change the meaning of what is happening. The meaning of any situation is subjective. If the meaning you are giving your situation does not serve you or move you forward to better days, then change it to something that empowers you.

5

. Change your story. We all have stories of why we don’t have what we want. The only thing that is keeping you from what you want in life are the stories we tell ourselves of why we can’t change. Change your story; change your life.

6

. Pain is part of life. Suffering is a choice. We all feel the bitter side of life. Staying stuck has nothing to do with what is happening. It is an act of suffering. We end it when we decide that we deserve something better than self-inflicted suffering.

7

. Life happens for us, not to us. I know this might be a bitter pill to swallow, and it is a basic truth. Acceptance is the key to inner peace.

Take massive action to improve your life. We cannot just think our way into a better life. We must take action. Whether you get a coach or venture on your own, take massive action now!

I wish you a month of love and passion.

. Focus on what you want, not what you fear or what you don’t have. What you focus on in life, you get more of. If you focus on what you don’t want, you get more of that.

3

. Feed your faith and starve your fears. Faith and fear cannot exist in the same space. What you feed will grow. What you starve will die. www.livingwellmagazine.net

Joe White is the President and founder of Get Life Coaching. Get Life Coaching is the leader in personal and professional development since 1999.

Joe recently was named 2016 North DelaWHERE Happening Winner Top Life Coach and the 2016 DSBC Blue Ribbons award “Best Markteting of the Year”nJoe can be contacted at: 302-832-3424, or email him at: doitnow@getlifecoaching.com or check out: facebook. com/getlifecoaching Follow Joe on @getlifecoaching August 2016

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RECIPES

KEY WHEAT FREE: WF GLUTEN FREE: GF DAIRY FREE: DF VEGETARIAN: V VEGAN: VE

Chicken with Sweetcorn Dressing 100g (3½oz) cooked chicken breast, cut into strips ½ an avocado, sliced 6 cherry tomatoes, halved

Leon Happy Salads by Jane Baxter & John Vincent, Conran Octopus 2015, Photography by Tamin Jones

4 spring onions, chopped ½ a Little Gem lettuce

Recipes include:

50g (1¾oz) black beans, drained

Classics: Waldorf, Lyonnaise and Caesar Salads

Dressing:

Divided into chapters that include Classics, Naturally Fast, Salads for Friends, Family Salads and Lunchbox, the book contains salads for all tastes and all occasions, as well as tasty, valuable tips throughout the book.

There is a section on crunchy additions, such as croutons and parmesan crisps, and a selection of go-to dressing recipes. Whether you’re looking for an exceptional salad to serve your friends or a simple salad to take to the office, this book is a must-have kitchen essential.

Ham Hock and Lentil Salad

1 cob of sweetcorn, kernels removed and roughly chopped

Vietnamese Chicken Salad with Rice Noodles

½ a clove of garlic, crushed 1 red chilli, chopped

Asparagus, Potato and Crab Salad

1 shallot, chopped

Leon Original Superfood Salad

juice of ½ a lime

Hot-smoked Salmon, Beet, Horseradish & Dill Salad

2 tablespoons olive oil

About the Authors



Leon was created on the matching principles that food can taste good and do you good. In this the latest addition to the Leon series of cookbooks, Leon authors Jane Baxter and John Vincent bring together 100 recipes for fresh, exciting, delicious salads that are healthy and happy.

Jane Baxter is the co-author of Leon Fast Vegetarian with Henry Dimleby and has a weekly column in the Guardian’s Cooksupplement. She also co-authored The Riverford Farm Cook Book, which won best First Book at the Guild of Food Writers’ Awards.

Jane worked at the Carved Angel in Dartmouth and the River Café London before becoming Head Chef at the Field Kitchen, the restaurant for Riverford Organic Vegetables. She now spends her time catering, consulting on food matters and hosting food events in unusual locations.

Pink Quinoa Salad

Red Cabbage with Bacon & Goats’ Cheese Salad Paella Deli Salad Spinach, Chickpea & Almond Salad

www.livingwellmagazine.net

1 tablespoon chopped fresh coriander salt and freshly ground black pepper Beats chicken and sweetcorn sandwich filler, hands down. But you already knew that.

Arrange all the salad ingredients on a plate or in a jar if you’re a hipster.

Mix together the dressing ingredients and season well.

Drizzle over the salad.

John Vincent, Leon’s Co-founder, wrote the bestselling Leon Naturally Fast Food with Henry Dimbleby and Leon Family & Friends with Kay Plunkett-Hogge.

John co-wrote the Government’s School Food Plan, with Leon co-founder Henry Dimbleby, which resulted in practical cooking and nutrition being put on the curriculum for the first time, and free school lunches for all infant children. John likes food, and Jane.

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1 piquillo pepper, chopped

Image on next page.

August 2016

Chicken with Sweetcorn Dressing Serves 1 Prep time: 15 mins WF GF DF

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August 2016

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The Original Superfood Salad Serves 2 Prep time: 10 mins Cook time: 5 mins WF GF V

This bowl of goodness has been on our menu since we opened our doors in 2004. It truly is the original – when we googled it before launching, it didn’t exist. Over the years, we’ve changed and grown a lot, but Leon evangelists will never let this one go.

⅔ of a head of broccoli, cut into bite-size florets, stalks peeled and sliced 120g (4¼oz) frozen peas, defrosted ¼ of a cucumber, cut into slim batons 100g (3½oz) good-quality feta, crumbled *2 tablespoons Leon toasted seeds (page 215 in book) ½ an avocado, cut into pieces 100g (3½oz) cooked quinoa, cooled a small handful of fresh flat-leaf parsley, roughly chopped a small handful of fresh mint, roughly chopped

*Any combination of roasted seeds and nuts along with a homemade vinaigrette or a bottled salad dressing of your choice.

You could...buy the book or win it if you are lucky enough to be the 10th person to report finding Valentino!

*3 tablespoons French vinaigrette (page 216 in book) 36

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August 2016

Put 2 cm (¾ inch) of hot water into a saucepan with a pinch of salt and cover the pan.

Once boiling, drop in the broccoli and put the lid back on. Drain after 3 minutes, then run the broccoli under cold water to take all the heat out and keep it good and green.

Now build your salad in layers: broccoli, peas, cucumber, feta, avocado, quinoa and finally the herbs and seeds. Dress the salad just before you eat it.

150g (5½oz) white crabmeat

Crab with Pink Grapefruit

1 tablespoon olive oil

Serves 2 Prep time: 15 minS DF

1 tablespoon lemon juice cayenne pepper, to season 1 pink grapefruit, segmented 1 avocado, chopped 50g (1¾oz) watercress 1 tablespoon chopped fresh chives salt and freshly ground black pepper Dressing: 2 tablespoons mayonnaise 4 spring onions, greens only, finely chopped 1–2cm (½–¾ inch) piece of ginger, peeled and finely grated 1 teaspoon soy sauce 1 teaspoon rice vinegar John would like to dedicate this to Katie as an apology for losing his wedding ring in the sand castle at the Crab Shack in St Brelade’s Bay, Jersey. And to the Pennys for helping to try to find it.

Season the crabmeat with the oil, lemon, salt and cayenne pepper.

Arrange the crab on a serving plate with the other salad ingredients.

For the dressing, blend the mayonnaise with the spring onions, ginger, soy and vinegar.

Season well and serve on the side. www.livingwellmagazine.net

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Jenifer Jurden is the CHO (Chief Happy Officer) of SHOUT b cause, LLC and the creator of Jurdy®, the cartoon hero of hopes, dreams and happy-ness.

Jurdy spreads the word about anti-bullying, great choices and living a happy life through the use of humor and positive outlooks.

Follow Jurdy on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or at: www.jurdy.com

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