Living.Well Magazine February 2017

FEBRUARY 2017

LIVING WELL MAGAZINE™

EXPRESS AND EXPERIENCE MORE LOVE RECIPES FROM THE CHILE PEPPER BIBLE

MATTERS OF THE HEART SUPPORTING CARDIOVASCULAR HEALTH, NATURALLY!

NATIONAL WEAR RED DAY® FRIDAY  FEBRUARY 3, 2017

DIY: Valentine’s Day

Handmade Sensual Gifts

HEALTH + HOME + FOOD + WEALTH + STYLE recycle: share this magazine

Michelle Jeanes

Lost 143 lbs Working with To-Ze Kept the weight off for 7 years No pills or powders

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A GIFT CERTIFICATE LET’S THEM CHOOSE INDULGE YOURSELF OR SOMEONE YOU LOVE WITH SPA SERVICES

ENJOY DINNER AT KRAZY KAT’S

GET YOUR DINNER AT THE BACK BURNER TO GO JUST PICK IT UP AND TAKE IT HOME!

PURCHASE A LOVELY GIFT FROM EVERYTHING BUT THE KITCHEN SINK

VALENTINE’S WEEKEND IS FILLED WITH LOVE...

AT THE INN FOR FEBRUARY The cheeky Krazy Kat’s Restaurant in Montchanin Village, which is

also home to an inn and spa, according to Philadelphia Inquirer food writer Craig LaBan: “The dining’s as serious as the décor is wacky.” If you stay at this highly praised inn, you can sip, sup and stroll back to your room.

The Back Burner Restaurant, which

was a pioneer when it opened in 1980, keeps winning new fans with the Burner’s pumpkinmushroom soup.

words from the editors and publishers:

Whether you voted for the incumbent president or not is insignificant. I am confident that everyone had some level of appreciation and understanding for the people all over the world, who marched for human rights this past January. My perception of the event was that the rally was not against our newly elected president but rather expressed the need in this country to continue to grow and to recognize that not just women need to be treated with respect and as equals; but that all human beings should be treated with respect, and as equals. It is difficult to fathom the amount of racism, bigotry, anti-Semitism, and hatred that is alive and well in this country. We will remain hopeful!

In this issue of LWM dig into comfort food recipes from the book, The Chile Pepper Bible by Judith Finlayson.

Create a wonderful meal for any night of the week for a family of six, an intimate Valentine’s dinner for two with left-overs or a big Super Bowl gathering, easily doubling each recipe to accommodate 12 people or tripling the recipe and so on if needed.

Show your support and Go Red for Women® for National Wear Red Day® Friday, February 3, 2017. Why Go Red? Heart disease and stroke cause 1 in 3 deaths among women each year, killing approximately one woman every 80 seconds. Fortunately, we have the power to change that because 80 percent of cardiac and stroke events may be prevented with education and action. In this issue find out what you can do to prevent heart disease and stroke.

Feel the love with Express and Experience More Love and create new memories with DIY: Valentine’s Day, Handmade Sensual Gifts.

Join us next month when we return with amazing new product releases and reviews, Tried & True, and of course amazing new Tech Addicted.

Enjoy & Share Everything! Brian and Diane Strauss

Advertising Inquiries: Brian Strauss - Publisher sales@livingwellmagazine.net

302-355-0929 Editors / Publishers Diane and Brian Strauss Associate Editor: Michael Strauss puppy love™ Creator Sean Strauss Media Development Jonelle Jentilucci Resident Artist and Creator of the Valentino caricature.

Liam McWilliams Design and Graphics Diane Strauss

START THE NEW YEAR...

LIVING.WELL EXPERIENCED AD SALES PEOPLE WANTED! JOIN OUR TEAM!

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VOLUME 12 NUMBER 2 LIVING.WELL MAGAZINE (ISSN 2325-2448) published monthly by Savendale Media Group, 1519 Old Coach Road Newark, Delaware 19711 Phone:302-355-0929 Fax:302-454-1867 www.livingwellmagazine.net

livingwellmagazine.net LIVING.WELL MAGAZINE© is a monthly publication distributed regionally. All articles and advertisements are accepted in good faith. Living Well Magazine assumes no responsibility or liability for any claims, conditions, products, services, errors, and/or opinions expressed through articles and advertisements appearing in this publication. Please check with your primary health care provider before making any changes. Living Well Magazine welcomes your comments and suggestions. No part of LIVING WELL MAGAZINE™ may be reproduced in any form without permission and written consent. Copyright, All rights reserved. 2015 Various Trademarks Used By Permission Of Their Respective Owners

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Cover: designed by dcstrauss

puppylove™

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February 2017

For more content, photos, and special give-a ways you can find and follow us on most social media forums.

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inside Express And Experience More Love

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Karen Verna Carlson

@livingwellmag The New Story of You Suzanne E. Eder

New Methods of Resolving Knee Pain without Drugs or Surgery

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Dr. Scott Rosenthal

The Failure of Hope Joe White

Ask The Vet Dr. Rose Dileva

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Hands on Health Ann Wilkinson P.T.M.S.

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Sexual Health and Healing: DIY: Valentine’s Day Handmade Senual Gifts

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Follow our Instagram page for an up close and personal look. www.instagram.com livingwellmagazine/

Many of the items appearing in LWM can be purchased at a local retailer.

We have included product website addresses so you can type in your zip code for local buying options and or direct purchasing if not available in your area. Most books are available at either: Barnes & Noble or Amazon.com

with Dianna Palimere, PhD, LCSW

TRIED

Earth Talk: One Of The Big Hurdles To Growth In Renewables Is Energy Storage.

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TRUE™ AWARD

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Matters Of The Heart Supporting Cardiovascular Health, Naturally!

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Melissa Crispell, CNS, CNHP

Recipes:The Chile Pepper Bible From Sweet to Fiery & Everything in Between

The prestigious— Living.Well Magazine Tried and True award is given only awarded to products and companies that we have used and can honestly say they were great! If it has the LWM Tried and True Award on it, we are sure that you will too.

#livingwell 16

Judith Finlayson

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February 2017

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Where’s Valentino?

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Cardiovascular diseases and stroke cause 1 in 3 women’s deaths each year, killing approximately one woman every 80 seconds. An estimated 44 million women in the U.S. are affected by cardiovascular diseases. 90% of women have one or more risk factors for heart disease or stroke.

WOMEN: Things you can manage to help stay heart healthy  1. MANAGE BLOOD PRESSURE High Blood Pressure is a major risk factor for Heart Disease and Stroke.

When your Blood Pressure stays within healthy ranges, you reduce the strain on your heart, arteries, and kidneys, which keeps you healthier longer.

2. CONTROL CHOLESTEROL

KNOWING YOUR NUMBERS IS IMPORTANT! The American Heart Association recommends that you be aware of five key numbers: Total Cholesterol, HDL (good) Cholesterol, Blood Pressure, Blood Sugar and Body Mass Index (BMI).

These numbers are important because they will allow you and your healthcare provider to determine your risk for developing Cardiovascular Disease by Atherosclerosis. This includes conditions such as Angina (chest pain), Heart Attack, Stroke (caused by Blood Clots) and Peripheral Artery Disease (PAD).

Learn about your health numbers by scheduling a visit with your healthcare provider.

High Cholesterol contributes to plaque, which can clog Arteries and lead to Heart Disease and Stroke. When you control your Cholesterol, you are giving your arteries their best chance to remain clear of blockages.

3. REDUCE BLOOD SUGAR Most of the food we eat is turned into glucose (or blood sugar) that our bodies use for energy. Over time, high levels of Blood Sugar can damage your heart, kidneys, eyes, and nerves.

4. GET ACTIVE Living an active life is one of the most rewarding gifts you can give yourself and those you love. Simply put, daily physical activity increases your length and quality of life.

5. EAT BETTER A healthy diet is one of your best weapons for fighting Cardiovascular Disease. When you eat a heart-healthy diet, you improve your chances for feeling good and staying healthy - for life!

6. LOSE WEIGHT

Source: The American Heart Association is devoted to saving people from heart disease and stroke – the two leading causes of death in the world. We team with millions of volunteers to fund innovative research, fight for stronger public health policies, and provide lifesaving tools and information to prevent and treat these diseases. The Dallasbased association is the nation’s oldest and largest voluntary organization dedicated to fighting heart disease and stroke. To learn more or to get involved, call 1-800-AHAUSA1, visit heart.org or call any of our offices around the country. Follow us on Facebook and Twitter.

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When you shed extra fat and unnecessary pounds, you reduce the burden on your heart, lungs, blood vessels and skeleton. You give yourself the gift of active living, you lower your Blood Pressure and you help yourself feel better, too.

7. STOP SMOKING Cigarette smokers have a higher risk of developing Cardiovascular Disease.

If you smoke, quitting is the best thing you can do for your health.

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February 2017

CoQ10 is responsible for:

MATTERS OF THE HEART

Increasing energy production in the heart Increasing the heart’s ability to contract Lowering blood pressure

Supporting Cardiovascular Health, Naturally!

Melissa Crispell

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention has reported that “nearly 800,000 Americans die each year from heart disease, stroke, and other cardiovascular diseases, accounting for one in every three deaths. About one in every six U.S. healthcare dollars is spent on cardiovascular disease.”

Cardiovascular disease is largely preventable, despite misconceptions. Through lifestyle and health management it is possible to promote and even restore healthy heart function.

Appropriate nutrition and fun, sweaty, activities (exercise) can significantly reduce chances for a heart related problem.

Coenzyme Q10 and L-Carnitine Fumarate are two key nutrients that support cardiovascular health. In addition to a well-rounded, heart healthy lifestyle, you may want to consider using these supplements to support energy production, detoxification, and eventually weight management.

CoQ10: Essential for Quality of Life Coenzyme Q10 (CoQ10) is an important electron transporter in biological tissues and is also a potent antioxidant. It is available in two forms: ubiquinone (oxidized) and ubiquinol (reduced)1.

The mitochondria are the power stations of our cells and CoQ10 is a vital factor in energy production. The electron transport energy system in the mitochondria can make more energy (in the form of ATP) than any other energy producing system in the body. However, without CoQ10 there is much diminished production of ATP. Without ATP there is no cellular energy.

Without cellular energy there is cell death. CoQ10 has, therefore, rightly been referred to as the essential nutrient for maintenance of quality of life.

Production of CoQ10 is known to reduce with age and additionally because of certain dietary deprivations like the lack of good fats. Medications such as statin drugs can reduce CoQ10 production typically by about 50%. Statin medications also carry a lot of side effects. So, it makes sense for anyone on statin medication to consider supplementation with CoQ10 for natural support.4 L-Carnitine Fumarate: Improved Energy, Cardiac Function & Weight Management L-Carnitine Fumarate is another valuable heart healthy nutrient.

This amino acid-like nutrient is found naturally in the body. It can be synthesized within the body from the amino acids lysine or methionine. L-Carnitine Fumarate plays a major role in efficiently burning fat by transporting long chain fatty acids to the mitochondria. This makes it possible for the mitochondria to make more energy available for exercise and other daily activities.

This process makes L-Carnitine Fumarate helpful for weight loss as well.

Carnitine supports cardiovascular health by enhanced fat burning in the heart muscle. Carnitine also significantly lowers LDL cholesterol levels while raising HDL cholesterol levels. It helps to keep coronary arteries clear, lowers high triglycerides 5, and can help lower blood pressure in those with hypertension. Studies have shown that carnitine can considerably improve the health of cardiac cells even in a phase needing valve replacement 6.

Whether you simply want to maintain a high level of health, or are seeking to enhance heart or brain function, consult with your healthcare professional for guidance—not only for proper dosages, but to insure you use a high quality product with optimal uptake and protective properties, available locally at First State Health & Wellness.

CoQ10 is known to be highly concentrated in heart muscle cells due to the high-energy requirements of these cells. For example, congestive heart failure (from a wide variety of causes) has been strongly correlated with the significantly low blood and tissue levels of CoQ10.2 The severity of heart failure correlates with the severity of the CoQ10 deficiency.3 This CoQ10 deficiency can easily be treated thus slowing the progression of heart failure.

Melissa Crispell, CNS, CNHP, CWC, is a certified natural health practitioner, certified wellness coach, certified lifestyle educator, friend of First State Health & Wellness and nationally recognized speaker. She has over 10 years experience as a natural health provider helping clients understand the connection between pH balance, food and chemical sensitivities, physical fitness and their overall health goals. If you’re looking to improve your health, visit www.firststatehealth.com or call First State Health & Wellness at 302.454.1200 to schedule a consultation.

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1 Petillo D, Hultin, H O. Ubiquinone -10 as an antioxidant.

Journal of Food Biochemistry, 2008; 32 (2):173-181 2 Folkers K, Vadhanavikit S, Mortensen S A. Biochemical rationale and myocardial tissue data on the effective therapy of cardiomyopathy with coenzyme Q10. In: Proc. Natl. Acad. Sci., U.S.A., 1985: 82(3); 901-904.

3. Mortensen S A, Vadhanavikit S, Folkers K. Deficiency of coenzyme Q10 in myocardial failure. In: Drugs Exptl. Clin. Res. 1984; X(7): 497-502.

Mortensen S A, Vadhanavikit S, Folkers K. Deficiency of coenzyme Q10 in myocardial failure. In: Drugs Exptl. Clin. Res. 1984; X(7): 497-502.

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Elisaf M, Bairaktari E, Katopodis K, Pappas M, Sferopoulos G, Tzallas C, Tsolas O, Siamopoulos KC.Effect of L-carnitine supplementation on lipid parameters in hemodialysis patients.Am J Nephrol. 1998;18(5): 416-421.

6 Xiang D, Sun Z, Xia J, Dong N, Du X, Chen X. Effect of L-carnitine on cardiomyocyte apoptosis and cardiac function in patients undergoing heart valve replacement operation. J Huazhong Univ Sci Technolog Med Sci. 2005; 25(5): 501-504.

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February 2017

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LOVE

the way you feel and love the way you look !

V

ALENTINO!

W

Caricature created by: Liam McWilliams

Enter: Where’s Valentino Contest Find Answers Here

ow! There are thousands of readers who are searching for Valentino. He is hidden somewhere on the pages of each issue. The entries keep pouring in.

We hope you have fun looking and will continue your quest to find Valentino. When you find him please email us at: info@livingwellmagazine.net [Please type “Valentino” on the subject line — keep searching and entering the “Where’s Valentino!” Contest every month for a chance to be entered to win some great gifts, subscriptions, T-shirts, mugs, cookbooks ,books, videos, etc. Or enter on our Facebook page www.facebook.com/LWMlivingwellmagazine (be sure to inbox us so you aren’t sharing his location with everyone), and be sure to like the page first. Please remember to share our pages with your friends!

Below Is The Answer To Last Month’s Where’s Valentino!

Thank you for finding Valentino! We had a record amount of entries this month and we will be sending out more prizes. Too easy? His ninja skills get sharper when the weather gets cooler Please make sure we have your mailing address. Because if you are a winner we can sent out your prize! For those of you who are still looking for Valentino, he was on p21“in the ad “Homegrown Cafe” Valentino was nestled inside the sandwich. When you find Valentino, send us an email at: Info@livingwellmagazine.net (be sure to put Valentino or Where’s Valentino in the subject line, all you have to do is tell us where he is.

After we receive your entry, a brief survey is sent back to you, please fill it out if you haven’t already. It is for LWM only and will never be shared.

Make sure you follow us on Twitter @livingwellmag Instagram @livingwellmagazine #livingwell Facebook.com/ lwmlivingwellmagazine Sign up for our Newsletter at www.livingwellmagazine.net

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February 2017

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One Of The Big Hurdles To Growth In Renewables Is Energy Storage.

Energy storage has been an Achilles heel in the emerging renewable energy sector, given the large environmental footprint required to produce and distribute our current crop of lithium ion and other types of batteries.The biggest challenge currently is that the rechargeables do not hold nearly the capacity needed to make intermittent renewable sources (like solar and wind) viable as secure year-round sources of power. If renewables energy sources are to replace fossil fuels, the true future will depend on our ability to drastically improve the way we are able to store elctricity.

However, given the importance of solving this problem, a lot of great minds are working on it. Electric carmaker Tesla is close to finishing construction on a “Gigafactory” in the desert outside of Sparks, Nevada to produce lithium ion batteries for its signature electric cars and its new line of utility-grade and household energy storage appliances. By 2018, the new renewable energy-powered facility will reach full capacity with an annual battery production capacity of 35 gigawatt-hours—and will produce more lithium ion batteries annually than were produced worldwide in 2013.

Tesla expects its Gigafactory to shave upwards of 30 percent off battery production costs, and serve as a model for how to mass produce green technology with a triple (social, environmental and financial) bottom line in mind.

But critics point out that merely lowering the production costs for existing technologies by a third won’t provide the quantum leap in storage capacity needed to make intermittent renewables as reliable as traditional “baseload” (e.g., consistent generation) sources such as coal, natural gas or hydropower.

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“Many researchers believe energy storage will have to take an entirely new chemistry and new physical form, beyond the lithium-ion batteries that over the last decade have shoved aside competing technologies in consumer electronics, electric vehicles and grid-scale storage systems,” reports Richard Martin, senior editor for energy at MIT Technology Review.

Some of the most promising designs employ cheap and abundant natural materials (such as air, water, carbon, sodium, quinine, and even sand) as catalytic substrates. But Martin points out that there are so many competing technologies “from foam batteries to flow batteries to exotic chemistries, that no one clear winner is attracting most of the funding and research activity.”

He adds that these small start-ups lack the capitalization to get their products ready for the mass market. Setting up a small manufacturing line and testing various combinations of materials to optimize a new battery technology’s potential storage capacity and charge/discharge rates could cost as much as $500 million, but most start-ups in the space can expect investments averaging only about $5 million a year. “That huge investment gap is hard to overcome,” concludes Martin.

For now, Tesla is poised to dominate the world’s battery market with its Gigafactory coming online later this year. But analysts think we’ll have some new alternatives to the lithium ion battery standard within a decade or so, especially if venture capitalists and other investors begin to grasp how important better energy storage options may be to our future.

CONTACTS: Tesla Energy, www.tesla.com/energy; MIT Technology Review, www. technologyreview.com.

EarthTalk® is produced by Roddy Scheer & Doug Moss and is a registered trademark of the nonprofit Earth Action Network. To donate, visit www.earthtalk.org. Send questions to: question@earthtalk.org.

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February 2017

of red blood cells. Porphyrins contain iron. This is what makes the tear stains a reddish-brown color. Porphyrins are present in saliva, urine and tears. Breeds that have a high prevalence are I frequently take my dog, Fritz, to the park where we Poodles, the Lhasa Apso, the Maltese and the Shih Tzu. The walk the trails. I am very sensitive to a number of plants and break condition is more obvious in lighter colored coats making the out in hives if I come into contact with one I am allergic to. Can contrast more obvious. my dog transmit poison ivy from his hair coat to me?

I would have your dog evaluated by a veterinarian. There could Poison Ivy ( Toxicodendron radicals) is a very common be a serious medical condition present involving the eyes. plant in most of the United States. It is best identified by the One such condition is called entropion which is a structural defect leaves, which are pointed at the tip and grow in groups of three. It in which the eyelid is inverted causing irritation to the surface of is usually green in the spring and red-orange in the fall. Its flowers the eye. The constant rubbing of the cornea will eventually cause have small clusters of white berries in the Spring. This plant can a superficial or deeper ulcer. Ocular ulcerations are very painful grow as a vine, a bush or a shrub. It is a very adaptable plant which and need to be treated promptly. Ingrown eyelashes is another condition that can cause the same defects. affects many people who have sensitive skin.

Q: A:

All parts of the plant cause itching. Usual signs include hives, redness, and itching on the skin. The toxic principle in poison ivy is an oil resin called urushiol. It is the same ingredient that causes allergic reactions in poison oak and poison sumac. Most animals are resistant to its effects and rarely get any skin irritation at all. Dogs with short hair coats resulting in more exposure to the plant, tend to be more prone to irritation. The same holds true for shorter dogs where their bellies brush up against plants, as well as, those dogs that spend time in wooded areas.

Other possibilities include infections, poor quality diets, stressful situations, glaucoma, smaller than normal tear duct opening, exposure to secondhand smoke, larger than normal tear glands, and plastic food or water bowls.

Plastic food and water bowls get worn down quickly, especially at the bottom of the bowl. Bacteria will stay in those defects and grow. This can irritate your pet’s face. I have seen a number of dogs and cats that are reactive to plastic. Better options include glass, stainless steel, ceramic or porcelain bowls.

If they ingest the plant, however, vomiting, diarrhea and dehydration can occur. The resin or sap adheres to your pet’s hair coat. This makes it very easy to get on your skin when you pet them. If your dog has been in an area where poison Ivy is likely to be, you should wash their hair coat immediately to get all the resin off. Make sure to wear rubber gloves when bathing your pet.

Make sure to keep your hands away from your eyes and face. Most of all make sure to wash the towels you used to dry your dog so the oil residue doesn’t linger. So the answer to your question is yes, dogs can get poison ivy but it is VERY unlikely. Second, they can transmit the sap from their hair coat to your hands by simply petting them.

The development of an abscess in the upper quadrants of the teeth will frequently manifest as a swelling just below the eye. This superficial swelling could subsequently irritate ocular structures and cause tearing.

If a medical condition is present, it should be appropriately treated. Providing fresh filtered water is the easiest change to make. Regular tap water can contain a higher than safe concentration of minerals, such as iron, chlorine or fluoride. Many of these impurities are toxic to our pets. Additionally, make sure to feed a high quality, species appropriate diet to minimize stress on the body and it’s organs that are involved in detoxification.

Some holistic veterinarians have recommended olive leaf, milk thistle and dandelion in attempts to reduce staining. Keeping I recently rescued a puppy mill, female, Shih Tzu. Other the fur around the eyes and face trimmed short will also help the than being matted, she seemed in good condition. After a good situation. Finally, make sure to use a damp, soft cloth to wipe the grooming I noticed that she has dark stains under her eyes. How face regularly. do I get this off her fur?

Q: A:

Bravo to you for rescuing your girl! She is very lucky. The staining you are seeing is the result of excessive tear production, otherwise known as, epiphora. The substance that makes the stains are called porphyrins. Porphyrins are breakdown products www.livingwellmagazine.net

Dr. Rose DiLeva is a 1987 graduate of the University of Pennsylvania’s school of Veterinary Medicine. She practices alternative and conventional veterinary medicine. Dr. DiLeva is a certified veterinary acupuncturist and a certified veterinary chiropractitioner. She can be reached at her Animal Wellness Center in Chadds Ford, Pa. at 610-558-1616 for appointments and telephone consultations.

Her web site is www.altpetdoc.com and www.drrosesremedies.com February 2017

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The New Story of You

Years ago I was introduced to the radical idea that our beliefs create our reality, and the idea captivated me so much that I’ve become a lifelong student of understanding its true meaning and implications. Today I realize that our reality is created by far more than our beliefs, but beliefs can play a powerful role in the creative process.

Back in the day, as “Your beliefs create your reality” was becoming a hot topic in the spiritual growth and self-help world, the focus was primarily on finding and eliminating the beliefs that limit us. For many people it became a “search and destroy” mission as they vowed to rid themselves of every last belief that might be an obstacle to living the successful and fulfilling lives they wanted to live.

But after years of finding, analyzing and letting go of limiting beliefs, they still weren’t where they wanted to be. So they stepped up the search, sure that if they dug deeply enough they would get to the bottom and, after dismantling that final, crusty old belief, they would be free.

Instead they discovered there was no bottom. There was apparently no limit to the limiting beliefs. And that’s because, in their myopic search for obstacles, they had lost sight of one of the most fundamental aspects of the creative process: what we focus on is what expands in our lives. If we’re focused on excavating limiting beliefs, we’re focused on limitation. We actually create, through our focus, new thoughts and experiences that limit us.

In other words, we remain stuck.

It turns out that our work isn’t to identify and destroy every belief that is limiting us. We need only recognize that our beliefs can limit us – or they can empower us. So our real job is create empowering beliefs. That’s the direct route to where we want to go.

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Suzanne Eder

I’ll be honest: creating a new belief is really the same thing as creating a new experience. Through your persistently focused attention on what you want, you will begin to experience momentum toward creating it. And as that momentum increases, you gain confidence in your ability to keep going. You begin to believe that you can create whatever it is that you want, and the belief itself will help sustain positive momentum.

I want to share with you a simple yet powerful practice that can help you cultivate belief in yourself – or, as I like to think of it, it can help you learn how to love yourself forward, into a life you love.

Tell a New Story Learning to tell the story of who you are and what you’re creating in a loving, supportive way shifts your self-identity from someone who can’t create what you want to someone who can. If you feel frustrated in some aspect of your life, your current story of who you are and what is possible for you to create likely isn’t a supportive one.

Let’s say you want to find or create work you really love, and this is the story you typically tell yourself about it: “I can’t believe I’m still stuck in this job I hate after all this time. I have wasted years of my life! I just can’t seem to figure out what I want. There are a few things I’m interested in but I don’t want to make the mistake of choosing the wrong career again. I keep trying different jobs in this company but none of them seem to be a good fit. There must be something wrong with me. Other people have figured this out but I keep going around in circles.

I might as well resign myself to staying here and think about my dreams when I retire.”

It isn’t difficult to see how this story – this string of conclusions, assumptions, fears and self-judgments, all of which can

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be considered beliefs – is keeping you trapped. You are disempowering yourself by continually focusing your energy and attention in ways that reinforce what you don’t want. And you can’t get what you want by focusing on what you don’t want.

It’s time to shift focus. It’s time to create a new story. Here are some elements to include in your new story: • What you want and why you want it

about people creating lives they love: their desire is the creative force behind their success. And my desire is pretty powerful!”

I suggest actually writing this story in your journal or in a notebook, and revising and updating it often. Let the whole exercise be fun! Intend to lift yourself up, to advocate for yourself and your dreams, to remind yourself of your many talents and fine qualities. Read what you write and take the time to let it sink in.

Feel the truth of it as deeply as you can.

• How good you’ll feel as this begins to manifest

The key to creating an effective new story is for it to be supportive • All the resources, inner and outer, you already have yet believable to you right now. This isn’t about imagining something so outrageous that you end up considering it nothing available to support you more than a fairy tale.

• Different ways you might experience what you want Creating an empowering new story is not a visioning exercise. It is an exercise in shifting your present-moment awareness toward • Beliefs you already hold that support your vision what you want in a way that invites you to dwell in it, rather than • Skills and talents you already have that will help you to dismiss it. manifest what you want Remember, what you focus on is what you create. Creating and • Things you’ve observed that help you remember this is revising and repeating your new story helps you focus powerfully possible on what you want, so that you’re building inner credibility rather • Steps you’ve already taken, progress you’ve already made than inner resistance. It teaches you how to love yourself into a life you love.

Your new story might sound something like this: Let it be your Valentine to you, the real You. “The longer I stay in this job, the clearer I become about what kind of work I really want. I want more flexibility in my schedule, I want to work on creative teams, I want to feel appreciated and Suzanne Eder is an award-winning writer, teacher and transformational life coach. She started her professional career as know that I’m making a difference. And I’d love to use more of a CPA and enjoyed a highly successful corporate career in both my writing skills. I really appreciate that I’ve explored so many Finance and Human Resources. She is a graduate of the Barbara different jobs in this company, because each one has shown me Brennan School of Healing’s intensive four-year program in mindmore about what I do and do not like, and the skills I most enjoy body-spirit healing, and was also a fitness instructor for 16 years. using. I just realized something—I’m already in the process of She founded Solid Ground Transformational Life Coaching in 2003 to help others awaken to their magnificence and create lives that light them up. Her first book, creating work I love! I’ve been exploring and gaining clarity. Now 10 Ways To Find Peace Rather Than Panic (When The World Has Gone A Little I just need to keep moving forward. There are so many people Crazy), earned a full 5-star rating on Amazon. Through her writing, retreats, who are doing work they love, clearly it’s possible! I’m going to classes and private mentoring she offers inspired and practical counsel in all areas call Fran and learn more about her transition from corporate work related to personal growth and transformation. Suzanne can be reached at see@ to being an entrepreneur. I really like what I read the other day mysolidground.com or 302-888-2138.

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15

Original San Antonio Chili

If you are looking for the ground beef chili your mother made for Friday night dinner, this isn’t it. If instead you want to taste what amounts to a fabulous, highly spiced beef stew, then I highly recommend this chili. Leftovers reheat well.

Gluten-Free Friendly Tips To reconstitute dried chiles, remove the stems and place in a heatproof bowl. Add 2 cups boiling beef stock and soak for 30 minutes, weighing the chiles down with a cup to ensure they remain submerged.

If you want to make a version of this dish that is similar to the one made by former U.S. President Lyndon Johnson, substitute venison for the beef. You can also cube a beef chuck roast and use it in place of the stewing beef.

Blender Dutch oven 2 each ancho and guajillo chiles, reconstituted (see Tips in book) 1/2 cup fresh cilantro leaves and tender stems 2 tbsp pure lard or oil 1 lb each trimmed boneless stewing beef and stewing pork, cut into 1/2-inch (1 cm) cubes and patted dry (see Tipsmin book) 2 onions, thinly sliced on the vertical 6 cloves garlic, minced 1 tbsp each ground cumin and dried Mexican oregano Salt and freshly ground black pepper 1 serrano or jalapeño pepper, thinly sliced (optional) 6 green onions (white and green parts), very thinly sliced (optional) Crumbled Mexican cheese, such as soft cotija 1. Transfer reconstituted chiles with liquid to blender. Add cilantro and purée until smooth.

Set aside.

2. Meanwhile, in Dutch oven, melt lard over medium-high heat. Add beef and pork, in batches, and brown on all sides, about 2 minutes per batch. Transfer to a plate as completed and set aside. Reduce heat to medium.

3. Preheat oven to 325°F (160°C). Add sliced onions to pan and cook, stirring, until softened, about 4 minutes. Add garlic, cumin and oregano and cook, stirring, for 1 minute. Return beef and pork to pan. Add reserved ancho and guajillo chile mixture and stir well. Season to taste with salt and black pepper. Bring to a boil.

Cover and transfer to preheated oven. Bake until meat is very tender, about 2 hours.

4. Ladle into warm soup plates. Garnish with serrano pepper (if using) and green onions (if using). Sprinkle with cheese.

Makes 6 servings

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February 2017

Tagine of Chicken with Apricots Tagine is the name for a type of earthenware vessel as well as the stew-like dishes that are cooked in it. They are popular throughout North Africa and differ among locales. This one is my own invention, but the addition of harissa gives it a Tunisian spin. I love the juxtaposition of hot and sweet flavors. It is easy enough to make for a weeknight meal, but with a tiny bit of dressing up, it is also perfect for guests (see Tips, below).

Gluten-Free Friendly Tips : To make this tagine gluten-free, be sure to check the label on your harissa paste. Some contain wheat ingredients as fillers.

For an impressive presentation, arrange cooked couscous, millet or even New-World quinoa in a ring around the edge of a deep serving platter and fill the center with the chicken mixture. Then garnish with the cilantro and pine nuts.

Using an instant-read thermometer is the surest way to determine when your chicken is cooked. Inserted in the thickest part of the thigh, it should register 165°F (74°C).

If you prefer a more concentrated sauce, transfer the finished chicken to a platter and keep warm. Boil the cooking liquid over high heat until reduced, about 4 minutes. Return chicken to sauce before serving.

Dutch oven

peppercorns

2 tbsp

2 bay leaves

olive oil

3 lbs bone-in skin-on chicken pieces, cut into serving-size pieces (breasts and large thighs halved) 2 onions, thinly sliced on the vertical

1 piece (2 inches) cinnamon stick 1 cup chicken stock 1 to 2 tbsp harissa paste 1 tbsp

liquid honey

4 cloves garlic, minced

12 dried apricots, halved

1 tbsp

1/4 cup finely chopped fresh cilantro

minced gingerroot

1/2 tsp sea salt 1/2 tsp cracked black

1/4 cup toasted pine nuts

1. In Dutch oven, heat oil over medium heat. Add chicken, skin side down, in batches if necessary, and lightly brown on both sides, about 3 minutes per batch. Transfer to a plate as completed and set aside.

2. Add onions to pan and cook, stirring, until softened, about 3 minutes. Add garlic, ginger, salt, peppercorns, bay leaves and cinnamon stick and cook, stirring, for 1 minute. Stir in stock, harissa to taste, and honey until blended.

3. Add apricots and chicken to sauce and bring to a boil. Cover, reduce heat and simmer until juices run clear when chicken is pierced (see Tips, left), about 30 minutes. Discard bay leaves.

4. Garnish with cilantro and pine nuts and serve immediately.

Makes 6 servings

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17

Paella

(recipe on next page)

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February 2017

Paella

My paella is not traditionally Spanish. It is more like a Portuguese dish in the sense that it combines seafood and meat. But I’ve been making it for years and it is a family favorite—one that, I might add, I often serve to guests.

Served with crusty bread, a simple green salad and some good white wine, it makes a perfect Friday night dinner with friends.

Gluten-Free Friendly Tips The best rice for making paella is Bomba; Valencia or Calasparra are good substitutes. In a pinch, use Arborio. Do not substitute long-grain rice, which isn’t starchy enough.

Ideally, you will want 3 to 4 cherrystone clams per person, but I have made delicious iterations of this dish using 6 to 8 much smaller clams per person.

You can eyeball the quantity with your fishmonger and adjust to suit your taste. The quantity of clams you use will not affect the results.

Large skillet or paella pan 1 red bell pepper, roasted (see Tips, page 166 in book) 4 cups chicken stock 1/8 tsp saffron, crumbled 2 tbsp olive oil 30 mL 1 lb thinly sliced pork butt or tenderloin 8 oz fresh (uncooked) chorizo sausage, casings removed 1 onion, finely chopped 4 cloves garlic, minced, divided 1 tsp sweet paprika 11/2 cups medium-grain rice (see Tips, above) 1/2 cup dry white wine 125 mL 1 can (14 oz/398 mL) diced tomatoes, with juice 2 lbs fresh clams (approx.), see Tips, above

1/4 cup butter 24 large shrimp (approx.), peeled and deveined 1/4 cup finely chopped fresh parsley 1. Seed and peel roasted red pepper and cut into thin strips.

2. In a large saucepan, combine stock and saffron. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat and simmer until ready to use.

3. In large skillet, heat oil over medium heat. Add pork, in batches if necessary, and cook, stirring, until just a hint of pink remains in center. Using a slotted spoon, transfer pork to a plate and set aside. Preheat oven to 400°F (200°C).

4. Add chorizo and onion to skillet and cook, stirring, until chorizo is no longer pink. Add half of the garlic and the paprika and cook, stirring, for 1 minute. Add rice and stir until well coated. Add wine and bring to a boil. Boil for 1 minute. Stir in tomatoes and juice, and stock mixture. Return to a boil.

Reduce heat and cook, stirring, until liquid just covers the top of the rice. Stir in reserved pork.

5. Arrange roasted red pepper strips over rice. Arrange clams on top. Transfer pan to preheated oven and bake until clams open, about 15 minutes. Remove from oven. Keep warm, discarding any clams that have not opened.

6. Meanwhile, in a skillet, melt butter over medium heat. Add shrimp and remaining garlic and cook, stirring, until shrimp are pink. Arrange shrimp over rice mixture. Garnish with parsley. Serve immediately.

Tip If you are serving this dish to someone who is sensitive to gluten, check the label on your chorizo. Wheat products are often added to sausage as filler.

They can also be hiding in stock, so it pays to check.

Makes 6 servings

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19

HANDS ON HEALTH by: Ann Wilkinson P.T.M.S,

Q:

I have been extending my Lumbar spine and being very aware of my posture as you have suggested in many of your previous columns. Testimonies in osteopathy suggest diet and environment to be important factors for chronic pain patients to be aware of. I use cleaning products in my work daily. What affect can this have on the fibromyalgia-like symptoms I am fighting?

Q:

Pain pills were the only option I was given for scar tissue pain as a result of abdominal surgery. That lead me to an unexpected journey that I never expected. The journey was bad for the entire family including my spouse who also began taking pills. Our rehabilitation was really an introduction to street drugs; relief at a lesser price. Withdrawing from the pain pills is extremely painful, worse than the pain that they were originally prescribed for. Yet, I still have pain from the surgery and additional pain from the weakness and debilitation that has followed the pain drug addiction. Can

It seems likely if you are cleaning every day you will Osteopathy hep me find my way back? certainly benefit from extension exercises to counteract all the bending and flexion that you do. It explains your back feeling better, as far as the mechanical aspect. The generalized joint

pain can however come from several other influences. Yes, diet Osteopathy offers quite a bit of assistance in scar relief, is one factor. Keeping an alkaline based diet with a healthy the original root of your pain. Body awareness, body alignment, amount of good fats and greens as well as healthy proteins exercises specific to the tightness and weakness of a chronically is a good base line. Using homeopathics, herbal and natural debilitated patient are all tools of osteopathy. Your fascia must remedies when experiencing an illness decreases the amount of be addressed as well as an assessment of craniosacral system toxicity imposed on the body when you are already down for the health, this is all osteopathy and at root of your pain. Structural count. Detoxification, stretching, mediation and cardiovascular balance is effective and very necessary for your recovery. There is exercise are all helpful in maintaining health. Environment, you another aspect, a non physical aspect, which includes meditation, are absolutely correct is also a very important factor concerning breathing and activities to clear the mind. Homeopathy, herbal healing and keeping healthy. If you are exposed to molds, toxic support and great care with diet are going to be the part that you fumes or noxious scents, there is an impact on not only the will need to be disciplined and diligent with guidance of course. immune system but the central nervous system as well. Exposure Boredom will be your biggest enemy. Service may be a cure to anything you are allergic to causes inflammation. Inflammation for that. Find someone in need, a cause and attend to that with affects the way muscles react to demands and stressors. Exposure passion. It will take a while to break habits and replacing those to toxins also causes inflammation and in addition affects the way habits with new activities. Osteopathy includes diet, breathing, the brain and the muscles communicate. The consequences are imaging, interaction with nature, therapeutic horse back riding, not just worse, or twice as bad, they are exponentially worse as far progressive exercises using Nature, natural oxegen and fresh air as how it is expressed in the human body. Breathing in or ingesting as tools to healing. Osteopathy sets the framework for increased neurotoxins is never good and the results are far reaching and hard confidence, stamina, endurance, will power and success. Pain to diagnose or treat. My suggestion is to eat organic, use organic relief by attending to the cause is far more effective than to mask cleaning products and drink clean, safe pure water. You may need symptoms with pain pills while simultaneously introducing a additional sweating and detoxification programs to get the toxins whole new set of tragic symptoms from addiction. Lets make out of your body that you have been previously exposed to. For better use of time, energy and vital life force. Osteopathy is life the toxins that do not leave easily through the excretory system enhancing. homeopathy can offer support. Counteracting affects that are more deep seeded homeopathy can handle residual influences.

I have seen many types of neuralgias, Bell’s Palsy, Lyme type symptoms, fascitis, fibromyalgia and myofascial pain, all a result of exposure to cleaning products, gardening herbicides or insect Ann is an award winning writer,teacher and speaker. Ann is the personal body killing products. From an osteopathic perspective, continue to worker of Her Holiness “Sai Maa”. Ann practices osteopathic physical therapy. Ann is also an expert on the use of healing foods, homeopathic and herbal consultations, look at yourself as an entire being and keep your body free from and therapeutic horseback riding. Ann treats her patients in a beautiful country poison, as much as you have control over.

A:

A:

setting which enables her to utilize all of her learned skills as well as some of the healing properties that only Mother Earth can bestow. Ann is available by appointment. Book online at www.handsonhealthde.com. The farm is also available for birthday parties, women’s circles, and retreats.

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February 2017

21

DIY: Valentine’s Day

Handmade Sensual Gifts

Dianna Palimere

In previous years, I’ve given suggestions for my favorite Valentine’s day gifts, including massage wax candles, luxurious body soufflés, and all things known to be a libido enhancer or aphrodisiac. This year, I thought it would be nice to take our gift giving a step further and make homemade versions of these sexy and sensual gifts. I’m not exactly a “crafty” person (my homemade goods typically involve the use of a microwave). Luckily, I was able to enlist the help of two local artisans, kind enough to divulge their secret “recipes” for sensual gifts you can make for—or with—that special someone. For added fun and excitement, each of these can be made with essential oils of your choice. I’ve noted a few ideas for each, based on the essential oils known to promote sexual energy or boost libido.

.50 oz. cocoa butter

If you’ve never used a massage wax candle before, you truly are missing out! It definitely adds a little something extra to giving your partner a sensual massage. Not only do you get the romance of candlelight, but the wonderful aroma of your favorite sensual scent. Be sure to blow out the candle, before pouring the oil from the melted candle into your hand or onto your partner’s body. If you’re looking for essential oils known to boost libido to add to your creation, some tried and true choices are: Jasmine, Ylang Ylang, and/ or Rose. I would try them individually, before experimenting with combining scents.

5. Pour slowly into candle jar, filling to just below edge.

Massage Candle:

Start with small glass jar, such as a 4 oz. canning jar or even a tea cup will do. You’ll need to purchase a wick for soy candles. These can easily be found at local art and craft stores.

Ingredients: 2.5 oz. soy wax flakes .75 oz unrefined coconut oil 22

.25.oz carrier oil (liquid at room temperature, such as olive, jojoba, almond etc.)

1. Melt all of the above in a double boiler 2. Dip tab end of candle wick into melting oils several times, pausing between dips, to build up wax on the end. Then place wick into center of bottom of candle jar to set wick in place.

3. Remove from heat and let cool to between 150-160 degrees F 4. Add 40-50 drops of essential oils, stir gently 6. Hold wick in place by using chopsticks or butter knives on each side of wick.

7. Let candle set for 24 hours 8. Trim wick to 1/4 inch before lighting.

Allow candle to burn at least 15 minutes before using the melted oil for massage. Fully extinguish candle, then dip fingers lightly into candle wax. A little goes a long way. Never pour hot wax directly onto skin (for safety).

Body butter is another wonderfully sensual gift that can easily be made at home. Unlike body lotion, body butter or soufflés have a thick, luxurious feel to them. Depending on what scent is used, they can be energizing and rejuvenating, or calming and relaxing. Try clary sage, neroli, or fennel essential oils, for a libido-boosting body butter.

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February 2017

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Body Butter:

— continued from previous page

Let’s stick with a 4 oz container. For this, we’ll need one that has a lid.

Gather up a sturdy whisk; a handheld or stand mixer would be helpful, but not absolutely necessary.

Ingredients: 1 oz unrefined coconut oil 1 oz. cocoa butter 1 oz shea butter .5 oz olive oil .5 oz beeswax 1. Melt all of the above in a double boiler 2. Remove from heat and let cool to 150-160 degrees F 3. Add 20-25 drops essential oils of your choice 4. Blend together well.

5. Pour into jar. Let this set for 24 hours in a cool place. It will harden if you refrigerate. Which isn’t bad, but makes it difficult to use.

In a large bowl, combine the dry ingredients – the baking soda, citric acid, cornstarch and salts. Next, stir in the liquid coconut oil (if you bought solid oil, just melt in microwave). The mixture should have a sand-like texture.

Add the essential oil, stirring it in. Next, very *slowly* add the teaspoon of vanilla, preferably one drip at a time. The mix will foam, which is normal and why it’s important to stir it quickly to minimize the fizzing. Repeat this with the water, *slowly* one teaspoon at a time, until it becomes slightly damp sand, where when you squeeze it together in your hand, it sticks together. You do not want to add too much water and activate the ingredients. Last, add the food coloring, only a couple of drops is necessary and stir.

Once the mixture is ready, promptly press it firmly into a mold. There are so many mold options, like ice cube trays, silicone molds, muffin pans and plastic trays used for chocolates, which lend themselves to many fun shapes. Make sure you pack it down using a smaller spoon and pay close attention to the edges instead of just pressing the middle, as that can cause them to crack. I use a small teaspoon or baby spoon to do this.

A tip from me to you, if they are fizzing while you are packing them, the mixture is too wet and they will not hold their shape. Since moisture can vary from house to house and region to region, you may need to experiment with how much water is best for your bombs.

This has a heavy creamy luscious feel. Great in the winter months. Now, you must be patient. I know, it’s hard, but you must wait a Some like it for rough hands, feet and elbows, but it can be used all minimum of 4 hours, or overnight. Remove them from the molds over the body. and then store in an airtight container until you are ready to use A year ago, I probably didn’t even know what a bath bomb was, let them. alone consider making one at home. They are generally round, but can be any shape. Once dropped into the bathwater, the bath bomb Note: Special thanks to Julia Semple* and Pammy Lu* for sharing will add color, fragrance, essential oils and fizz to the bath water. A their recipes. If you are interested in purchasing these items rather treat for all of the senses (except taste…do not eat bath products). than making them you can contact Julia and Pammy via email.

The most popular bath bomb made by Lush is the “Sex Bomb” which includes jasmine, clary sage, and ylang ylang essential oils (see www. lushusa.com for more info). Once you’ve tried experimenting with creating your own combinations, you might want to try a variation of those three aphrodisiacs, for a bath bomb that will be sure to please!

Plush by Pammy Lu on Etsy., email: pammyluplush@gmail.com Organic hair and body products, contact Julia Semple at: mylomilomi@gmail.com

Bath Bomb

Makes 1-3 dozen (depending on size of mold) Ingredients:

Sexual Health and Healing with Dianna Palimere, PhD, LCSW

1 cup baking soda ½ cup citric acid ½ cornstarch 2 tablespoons Epson salts 2 tablespoons unscented coconut oil 1 teaspoon vanilla extract 4 teaspoons water Few drops of lavender essential oil Food coloring, optional

Dr. Dianna Palimere is a Psychosexual Therapist and Licensed Clinical Social Worker.

She has been working in the field of mental health for the past 16 years, dedicating the past 13 years to specializing in clinical sexuality. She holds a Bachelors degree in Psychology, a Masters degree in Social Work, a Masters degree in Human Sexuality Education, and a PhD in Clinical Human Sexuality. Utilizing a holistic approach to therapy, she incorporates a variety of clinical interventions in her work with individuals, couples, and families. She is devoted to helping people achieve sexual health and healing through her work as a psychotherapist in her private practice in Pike Creek, DE; as well as in her work with local nonprofit organizations. To learn more about her or to schedule an appointment, visit her website: www.SexTherapyInDelaware.com Join her on Facebook, keywords: Sex Therapy in Delaware. www.livingwellmagazine.net

February 2017

23

Express and Experience More Love Karen Verna Carlson

for Himself (1953) psychiatrist Rollo May cites apathy and emptiness morphing “into morbidity and despair, and eventually into destructive activities.”

Love & Will Reach Out

“There are four kinds of love in Western tradition. One is sex, or what we call lust, libido. The second is eros, the drive of love to procreate or create—the urge, as the Greeks put it, toward higher forms of being and relationship. A third is philia, or friendship, brotherly love. The fourth is caritas or agapé as the ancient Romans called it, the love which is devoted to the welfare of the other, the religious prototype of which is the love of God for man. Every human experience is a blending in varying proportions of these four.”

Dr. Rollo May, LOVE and WILL (W.W. Norton & Co, Inc, NY, 1969)

How appropriate to rediscover a timeless author for this month’s timeless theme. Expressing more love is the light that dispels the darkness of its opposite—apathy. In his earlier Man’s Search

Hate or fear is not the opposite of love, and indecision is not the opposite of will, according to May’s LOVE and WILL. “The opposite of will is…being uninvolved, detached, unrelated to the significant events. Then the issue of will never can arise. The interrelation of love and will inheres in the fact that both terms describe a person in the process of reaching out, moving toward the world, seeking to affect others or the inanimate world, and opening himself to be affected; molding, forming, relating to the world….” From that perspective think about your activities. Do they reach out? Foster connection?

Apathy Is Gradual Death “This is why love and will are so difficult in an age of transition,” writes May, “when all the familiar mooring places are gone. The blocking of the ways in which we affect others and are affected by them is the essential disorder of both love and will….Apathy, — continued on next page

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February 2017

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operating like Freud’s ‘death instinct,’ is a gradual letting go of involvement until one finds that life itself has gone by.” May observes, “Violence is the ultimate destructive substitute which surges in to fill the vacuum where there is no relatedness.”

the sheer fact of intimacy of relationship is—the meeting, the growing closeness with the excitement of not knowing where it will lead, the assertion of the self, and the giving of the self—in making a sexual encounter memorable.”

Express Connectedness

Biological, Psychological, Emotional

Meanwhile, more than half a century has passed inundating our lives with great changes, while some underlying issues worsen.

One solution we all can implement for every dilemma is to express more love. Love is part, if not the basis, of the answer to any question. I wonder, how many uplifting ways might we discover to blend these four kinds of love into infinite daily expressions of connectedness?

The second love category is eros—“The drive which impels man not only towards union with another person in sexual or other forms of love, but incites in man the yearning for knowledge and drives him passionately to seek union with truth,” explains May. “Eros is the power in us yearning for wholeness; the drive to give meaning and pattern to our variegation, form to our otherwise impoverishing formlessness, integration to counter our disintegrative trends. Here we must have a dimension of experience which is psychological and emotional as well as biological….We are in eros not only when we experience our biological, lustful energies but also when we are able to open ourselves and participate, via imagination and emotional and spiritual sensitivity, in forms and meanings beyond ourselves in the interpersonal world and the world of nature around us.”

Love Is Caring More caring in a relationship expresses more love in sex (the most primitive love category). “It is a strange thing in our society,” May states, “that what goes into building a relationship—the sharing of tastes, fantasies, dreams, hopes for the future and fears from the past—seems to make people more shy and vulnerable than going to bed with each other.”

Intimacy Is Amazingly Important He says, “When we cut through all the rigmarole about roles and performance what still remains is how amazingly important

Love Deepens Consciousness The higher levels of love—philia and agapé—contribute even more to the deepening of consciousness “based on the original ‘we’ experience.” May explains, “Contrary to the usual assumption, — continued on next page

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we all begin life not as individuals, but as ‘we’; ‘we’ are created by the union of male and female….Individuality emerges within this original ‘we,’ and by virtue of this ‘we.’ ”

constructively engage my will towards fulfilling them. (May credits Freud with this brilliant approach, though it’s a variation of the ancient carrot-donkey trick!)

Love Is Not a Single Emotion

No Will Without a Prior Wish

May describes the “chum” phase of human development from about age eight to twelve, “As the time of genuine liking of the same gender….It is the beginning of the capacity to care for someone else as much as for yourself.” Lab experiments with monkeys revealed sexual dysfunctions among those “not permitted to make childhood friends, who never learned to play with siblings or friends in all sorts of free and nonsexual ways….

The period of play with peers is, in other words, an essential prerequisite to the later learning of adequate sexual attraction and response….[Scientist] Harry Harlow says, ‘We believe that the role of affection in the socialization of primates can only be understood by conceiving love as a number of love or affectional systems and not as a single emotion.’

“The human wish,” says May, “is not merely a push from the past, not merely a call from primitive needs demanding satisfaction. It also has some selectivity. It is a forming of the future, a molding by a symbolic process which includes both memory and fantasy, of what we hope the future will be. The wish is the beginning of orienting ourselves to the future, an admission that we want the future to be such and such; it is a capacity to reach down deep into ourselves with a longing to change the future….There is no will without a prior wish.”

No Time for Friendship

So, in order to express (and experience) more love I’ve relaxed my tyrannical white knuckle will power in favor of lighthearted wishing. Exercising will power was never really very enjoyable.

May is right to point out, “This process results in a greater and greater emotional void…impoverishes imagination and intellectual experience; it stultifies and suffocates longings and yearnings as well as wishes. No one needs to remind us of the great stores of resentment, inhibition, hostility, self-rejection, and related clinical symptoms which can develop as a result of this repressive kind of will power.” Well, I certainly need that reminder. Otherwise I’d be off trying to herd cats.

“In our hurried day,” continues May, “philia is honored as a kind of vestige of bygone periods when people had time for friendship.

We find ourselves so rushed, going from work to meetings to a late dinner to bed and up again the next morning, that the philia contribution to our lives is lost….”

All Love Is Blended “Philia, in turn, needs agapé. We have defined agapé as esteem for the other, the concern for the other’s welfare beyond any gain that one can get out of it….Each kind of love, however, presupposes care, for it asserts that something does matter. In normal human relations, each kind of love has an element of the other three, no matter how obscured it may be.”

Relax, Already

At the moment it feels right for me to shelve willpower and play with love.

The Solution Is Simple What does Dr. May suggest in this scholarly book as the way to set more love expression into motion? Make a wish. “No matter how much the patient is the victim of forces of which he is unaware, he is orienting himself in some particular way to the data in the very revealing and exploring of these deterministic forces in his life, and is thus engaged in some choice no matter how seemingly insignificant; he is experiencing some freedom no matter how subtle.”

Wishes Engage Will Choose to develop a wish about what you think you might possibly want. Playfully brainstorm, fantasize, envision. Change the wish or replace it with another. Savor, sculpt and polish each wish. Instead of using will power to deny my wishes, Dr. May encourages me to use my wishes, wants and yearnings to 26

Karen Verna Carlson, N.D., Ph.D. (Hon.) is a naturopathic physician and professor credited with “the first major breakthrough in Swedish Massage—research demonstrating energetic interconnections”—since Peter Ling systemized it in the early 19th century. After 35 years running her own nationally accredited school of holistic healing and massage she has retired to provide a new kind of holistic care for individuals and families. In addition to her specialties of healing massage and bodywork, she provides sensitive, timeand cost-effective services for home or office, family members and staff, that include diverse holistic problem solving for garden, pets, children and elders.

She has received international recognition for holistic healing and educational work, an honorary degree, silver medal, and Who’s Who listing. She’s appeared on TV and radio and has been featured in professional publications and mass media. kvc@livingwellmagazine.net Phone (302) 777-3964

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February 2017

Hope is interesting. It acknowledges the desire but has no commitment or responsibility. When things don’t go the way you want to you can slide back and say, “Well I guess it wasn’t meant to happen” or even worse, “Just my luck, things never go my way.”

You would not take your hands off the wheel of your car and hope you don’t hit anything. That is ludicrous and so is when you hope something goes your way.

when you risk nothing, life tends to return to you what you gave...

NOTHING! All success comes with risk. Love comes at the risk of a broken heart. Starting a business comes with a risk of going out of business. Full commitment to your goals risk falling short of them.

But isn’t that a part of life?

Life is dynamic. The highs and lows. When we avoid the lows, we also miss the highs. Embrace the journey, the process, and equally important, embrace life by living life fully. Often failure and setback is our greatest teacher, and rock bottom becomes the foundation in which we build upon.

Stop hoping and start doing, and I promise you that you will achieve more, grow more, and have an even greater, more fulfilled life.

Now it is time for some GOYA!!

I wish you a month of love and passion!!!

I have bought and read the book, The Secret, seven times. Each time I swore that my copy was defective, missing the last chapter, Taking Action. It is the GOYA principle. If you want something in your life, you must practice GOYA. Get Off Your A** !!

This is true in the law of attraction, prayer, goal setting or whatever you are trying to achieve.

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It was in the middle of one my breakthrough events, Ultimate Breaking Through The Barrier. He attended because he was losing control of his life. His relationship was failing. His work was suffering and has been financially treading water for years. I had asked him, “What are you going to do to take control of your life?” That was his response. My response was simple, but to the point. I walked closer to him and sat next to him. I put my hand on his shoulder and looked at him straight in the eye and said, “The truth of the matter is, hope is a lousy strategy.” It is like needing money and going to the casino and playing a slot machine. As you pull that big lever, you hope that you win and you rarely do.

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February 2017

27

New Methods of Resolving Knee Pain without Drugs or Surgery

Dr. Scott E. Rosenthal

Do you feel like your knee is hanging on by a string?

Wonder how you’re supposed to get through life (let alone walk 10 feet) when your knee is swollen, painful and unstable? Having suffered from a sportsrelated injury that left me in chronic pain for years, I believe my experience, personal struggle and quest for alternative solutions can offer you hope for dealing with your own knee problems without surgery or excessive medication.

There are usually several problems involved, not just one Drugs are typically incapable of addressing the underlying issue Artificially masking symptoms may worsen the problem in the long run If you ignore it, it won’t go away Too often a healthcare approach is plagued by tunnel vision.

Only the area of pain is addressed and treated while the underlying cause is neglected. This is most evident in the case of the knee. I have found in my personal situation and with many of my patients that the majority of knee conditions are caused by problems within the pelvis. The exception is when there is clear and direct trauma to the knee itself.

First, there are important facts to address about most knee problems to address before a long-term solution can be obtained: The underlying cause is often not within the knee (think of the chicken and the egg)

The body has a unique way of alternating the function of adjacent joints. The ankle is very flexible and can move in multiple directions. Jump up to the knee and you will find a joint that has limited motion (hinges). Move higher up and you find a hip joint that functions more like the ankle with great flexibility and multidirectional movement. The low back again is relatively inflexible in comparison to the hip. The same pattern that alternates between a joint with much movement followed by one with that is more stable with less movement can also be seen in the upper extremity (wrist, elbow, shoulder and neck).

Problems arise when a joint region that is highly moveable and flexible becomes stiff and inflexible. Your hips are prone to this dysfunction (which may or may not be painful or noticeable). When hip function is greatly diminished, abnormal forces are transferred to the knee. Over time, the over-worked knee becomes unstable, leading to excessive wear and tear, inflammation and, ultimately, pain. If left uncorrected, the prolonged stress causes accelerated degeneration.

The complexity of the problems arising in the “simple” hinging joint of the knee can’t be understated. A successful approach is one that views the problems in layers or as an equation with multiple parts. All of the following must be considered and treated: bone alignment (including all the joints of the lower extremity, spine and pelvis), nerve suppleness, muscle weakness and spasm, distortion of fascial tissue (thin sheath of fibrous tissue enclosing a muscle), and the existence of chronic trigger points (a sensitive area in the muscle or connective tissue that becomes painful when pressed on). Although one component may be a dominate factor, the magic happens when all pieces of the puzzle are corrected.

Like so many health conditions, the answers cannot be found in a pill bottle. The knee is no exception. Drugs are incapable 28

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February 2017

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of correcting the physical dysfunctions mentioned above. Of greater concern, masking the symptoms can allow the problem to progressively worsen without your awareness. Such an approach can not only put you on the fast track to the surgeon’s office, but can prevent you from living life to its fullest and doing all the activities you like to do.

My quest to solve my own knee condition may have taken years, but it led me to find a unique combination of techniques that bring the greatest results. This journey forced me to look outside the box which included training under doctors who have worked with Olympic and professional athletes, inventors of groundbreaking methods, and much personal experimentation and innovation. The protocol that emerged nearly eliminated my own knee problem and has helped countless others. To my surprise, modifying the protocol has also helped improve function and reduce pain in those who recently underwent knee replacement surgery.

makes sense. It’s safer, cheaper and solution oriented. Fortunately, the response to care tends to be quick and only takes a handful of visits to know if success is possible. If results are seen, care is continued. If not, I let the patient know as soon as possible that they need to consider other avenues.

With a multifaceted approach, you have a great opportunity to find meaningful relief or resolution of your knee pain. Drugs and surgery may be avoidable and replaced with a safe, comfortable, and inexpensive approach. Don’t ignore the problem. Take the first step into a better future. After all, the health of your knee is hinging on it!

Dr. Scott E. Rosenthal is a second-generation Doctor of Chiropractic and a past president of the Delaware Chiropractic Society. His undergraduate degree is in Nutrition and he is a Certified Yoga Teacher. In his Wilmington practice, he offers the cutting-edge Koren Specific Technique (KST) as well as other contemporary and traditional approaches. KST comfortably integrates gentle adjustments of the spine, cranial bones, TMJ, arms and legs (including the wrists and feet). Dr. Rosenthal specializes in pain relief, auto or work injury recovery and natural ways to boost whole body wellness.

To contact Dr. Rosenthal please visit rosenthalchiropractic.com or 302-999-0633.

Although I find great success in helping those with knee pain, there are times when the condition has progressed too far. For these people I am thankful for the more invasive approaches available. It has always been my motto that I am grateful for drugs and surgery when they are needed, but more grateful when they can be avoided.

I believe that starting with the conservative protocol that I use

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