Invited
To ponder How has the death of your loved one affected you directly and indirectly? Much has been researched and written about grief, and some approaches identify a number of stages in the process. While these phases are not necessarily linear or sequential, such a slant can give the impression that grief is predictable. It is most certainly not! Grief affects every part of us—emotions, thoughts, bodies, spirits, connections, and sense of purpose and meaning—all at once, moving more like waves or spirals than in straight lines. Just as our experience of grief is highly personalized, so is our experience of healing. You might talk about your experience or you may keep it to yourself; you might resume work, or you may step back for a while. You might also seek the support of a trained professional such as a doctor or counsellor. There is no single pathway to healing, but all begin with noticing what is happening for you and deciding what would help you at this time. When we are healing from physical injury, we do what helps to reduce pain and symptoms; we work with health professionals to find the therapy, equipment, and support we need. The grief experience is handled very differently in Western society. We are usually left alone at some point to get on with it, and often with no clue about what to do next. 31
