Attitude of Gratitude

by Zuhal

What if everything had been perfect, would you be happy?... No, seriously, take a deep breath. Stop reading and think about it for a minute. What if you hadn’t experienced adversity in your life and everything had been just as you had dreamed? Would you be happy?

Would you know what it means to stand up, if you’ve never fallen? Could you feel a sense of accomplishment if you didn’t work for anything? Would you possibly be able to understand that your life is perfect if you’ve never witnessed imperfection? If you answer, “Yes, I would be happy if I didn’t know sadness.” Then I ask you, “Are you thankful for all you have right now? You are not guaranteed the water you drink, the health you have, nor any of the blessings God has given you.” While you may not have everything you wish for, are you grateful for all the blessings you already have or are you too busy complaining about the things you don’t? No one and nothing is perfect,; but I believe in the perfection of imperfection. Happiness is a matter of perception while dissatisfaction is the neglect of reality. Nothing can be 100% bad, just as nothing can be 100% good; so, in reality, there’s ALWAYS something to improve and something to be thankful for.

To be thankful, you need to be mindful; mindful of everything that you have within you. I want you to take a moment to think about this; “Do you judge yourself more often than you appreciate yourself? If the answer is ‘yes’, why?” I understand that many of us live in a community where recognizing our own beauty, intelligence and talent can be considered as “egotistical.” However, it’s crucial to acknowledge the importance of self-love and how it affects the way others perceive you. To gain the respect of others, you must have respect for yourself. And yes, you guessed it! You need to love yourself, to accept another's love for you. Confidence is not egotistical – you can love yourself; you can think you are beautiful, smart, amazing, talented, etc. and that’s a good thing! You can embrace your uniqueness and grow further in the areas you strive in. However, there’s a fine line between confidence and ego. Have confidence, know what you’re capable of, but remember that you’re not the source of your power (all of these are given to you by God). Always be thankful for all that you have. Academic research has shown that there’s a correlation between gratitude and success. There are pages and pages written on this topic, but in this article, I will only briefly mention a few of them. Firstly, a person who is more mindful of what he or she has will be more likely to be more motivated and hopeful for their future. They will work harder and enjoy doing so. Secondly, people with gratitude seem to have more people around to help them when they need it and also more people to appreciate them compared to others; which I think occurs simply because more people enjoy being around them. Lastly, thankful people are less likely to be depressed or discouraged in the face of adversity, because they know to focus on what they have and to start from there.

Gratitude is not about what we have; we do not have to be happy to be thankful, but we need to be thankful to be happy. It’s about being determined to discover the blessings one has. We can be thankful for the adversities we face, the lessons we learn, and the opportunities that come from them. Losing something reminds us of how important it is. I’ve had two serious concussions in the last five years. After the second, the doctor said, “It’s almost a miracle that you aren’t paralyzed, let alone alive! You can’t ever be thankful enough that you survived this as healthy as you did.” With the excruciatingly painful headache I had, I looked at the doctor and said, “What do I need to be thankful for, exactly?! My continuous headache prevents me from doing basically anything.” To this, he responded, “Your brain and body might not be working as it used to, but they are still working, and hopefully, you will get better. But as I said before, considering the part you hit your head, it’s a miracle that you can still move around, talk, and think.

19 | Mirvari November 2020 It might be hard to do those things, but you’re still capable of doing them; Keep that in mind and be thankful for your health and abilities.” I will not go into detail about my concussions, it’s a long story. I shared this memory because it changed my perspective on life, and I thought it may help to change yours. It’s tragicomical, but

I became more thankful for my abilities after I lost so many of them. I still have some symptoms of my concussions, but I am thankful for them because they made me realize what I had before them and made me think about what I have right now. I choose to make the most out of them and to be grateful for them.

Thankfulness is about satisfaction, not happiness; one can be, I think needs to be, thankful for their tears, sadness, and pain too. Emotions and feelings are blessings; there will be an article about the importance of crying in the upcoming pages. For physical pain, I want to mention Congenital Insensitivity, a disease where you don’t feel pain, and the importance of feeling pain. Accordingly, we need to be thankful even for our pain. Being thankful doesn’t necessarily mean being happy at the time, but I can assure you it will bring happiness eventually. If you think your life is a mess and you have nothing right now, let me tell you this; you have a working brain that allows you to read or listen to this article. That, alone, is a huge blessing. If you’re struggling in your classes or at work, trust me, there are millions of kids who wish to go to school but can’t. There are also millions of people who wish to have a job that would simply pay enough for them to bring food home. It is our responsibility to acknowledge the blessings we have and the responsibility that comes within those blessings to make this world a better place. We, and I mean everyone, don’t get to give up. Especially youth of this generation, who have access to education and the opportunity to learn, have the responsibility to do so. We are the future and we’ll be the ones to change this world for the better. It is our responsibility to create a world without hunger, hate, discrimination, and education inequality for the next generation. We have so much to be thankful for in our lives, even when we think we have nothing, and that comes with responsibility.

Boehm, Julia K., and Sonja Lyubomirsky. Does Happiness Promote Career Success? Journal of Career Assessment, 18 Aug. 2008. SAGE Journals Online, drsonja.net/wp-content/themes/drsonja/papers/BL2008.pdf.

"Giving Thanks Can Make You Happier." Harvard Health Publishing, Harvard Medical School, www.health.harvard.edu/healthbeat/givingthanks-can-make-you-happier.

Ward, Marguerite. "Being Grateful Improves Your Chances of Success, Studies Show." CNBC Make It, CNBC, 7 Nov. 2016, www.cnbc. com/2016/11/04/being-grateful-improves-your-chances-of-successstudies-show.html.