Carolina Parent Raleigh Jan 2019 by Morris Media Network

January 2019 • Free

DIAGNOSIS DESTINATION Where to take your child for illnesses, injuries and accidents

Understanding MyChart What it is and how it works

Trump’s Tax Code Experts weigh in on how it impacts your budget

5 Steps to Creating a Family Will carolinaparent.com | JANUARY 2019

Pediatric Surgery Orthopaedics Neurology Diabetes Endocrinology Urology Pediatric Intensive Care Primary Care Urgent Care Radiology Pediatric Anesthesiology Cardiology Neonatology Perinatology Gastroenterology Emergency Medicine Ear, Nose and Throat Child Life Rehabilitation Weight Management

Inside every kid, there’s a life waiting to be lived. We’re here to see that it’s a healthy one. Some kids go through childhood unscathed. Others face illness. Injury. Surgery. From the common to the complex, we’re here. With the only children’s hospital in Wake County. The most advanced technology. Specialists, nurses and therapists who specialize in kids. A scope of services that’s second to none. A patient-family experience that’s one of a kind. And when we say we’re here, we mean right here. Where you live. Which, when it comes to your kids, is something no one else can say.

Learn more at wakemed.org/kids.

At UNC Physicians Network we believe exceptional health care goes beyond medical excellence. It’s about going the extra mile and providing a personalized and unique patient experience — like quality visits with our doctors, access to counseling and health care advocates, and clustered offices for convenient, whole family visits. We call ourselves a network, but we’re really a dedicated family of doctors ready to stand shoulder to shoulder with you and your loved ones to offer outstanding care and support. Because that’s what families do.

Visit uncpn.com to find a doctor near you.

O N L IN E S CHE DUL IN G AVAIL ABL E | UN CP N .COM

VOLUME 31, NUMBER 1

CONTENTS JANUARY 2019

FEATURES 16

DIAGNOSIS DESTINATION Where to take your child for illnesses, injuries and accidents

20 THE TRUMP TAX CODE How the 2017 Tax Cuts and Jobs Act may impact your family budget

19 UNDERSTANDING MYCHART Find out what it is and how it works

22 5 STEPS TO CREATING A FAMILY WILL Check estate planning off your 2019 to-do list

IN EVERY ISSUE 5

January Online

COLUMNS

CALENDAR

Editorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Note

24 Growing Up

34 Our Picks

40 Faces and Places

27 Oh, Baby!

35 Performances

FYI

28 Understanding Kids

36 Daily

Community

10 Education 12 14

29 Father Figuring 30 Tech Talk College Transitions

Health

Style

32 Excursion

carolinaparent.com | JANUARY 2019

Accepting New Patients

Blue Ridge OB/GYN is now part of Duke Health Blue Ridge OB/GYN’s board-certified providers, backed by Duke’s extensive network of specialists, remain committed to delivering the outstanding care you expect, as they have done since 1952. Our experienced providers offer a broad range of women’s health and specialty services for all ages—from puberty to childbirth to menopause. Whatever your needs, we’re here for you.

Blue Ridge OB/GYN 3200 Blue Ridge Road Suite 118 Raleigh, NC 27612 919-781-2500

11001 Durant Road Suite 100 Raleigh, NC 27614 919-782-9005

ONLINE

Family Mealtime Fun EXPLORE A FOOD HALL

VOLUNTEER

Unique food hall dining experiences are now — or soon will be — available in Raleigh, Durham, Chapel Hill and Cary. carolinaparent.com/cp/food-hall-trend-comes-tothe-triangle

Volunteer opportunities don’t end when the holidays do. carolinaparent.com/cp/volunteerand-community-serviceopportunities-in-the-triangle

RING THE DINNER BELL Discover why dinner is the most cherished time of day for one Hillsborough dad. carolinaparent.com/cp/ringing-the-dinner-bell

GO LOCAL AND ORGANIC

facebook.com/ carolinaparent

twitter.com/ carolinaparent

WIN PRIZES Enter to win prizes that inspire outdoor fun and indoor creativity. carolinaparent.com/cp/contests

pinterest.com/ carolinaparent

Images courtesy of Iryn/Shutterstock.com

Consider these Triangle businesses when shopping for organic foods. carolinaparent.com/cp/organic-dining-andshopping-options-expand-in-the-triangle

instagram.com/ carolinaparent

carolinaparent.com | JANUARY 2019

EDITOR'S NOTE

Deliberating and Diagnosing

morrismedianetwork.com

PUBLISHER

Katie Reeves · katie.reeves@morris.com

hen my daughter was 10 years old, she experienced the joy of discovering not one, but two ticks attached to the back of her right ear. (This happened often to my kids — a consequence of playing in our woodsy backyard during summer.) The first tick was fairly easy to remove. The second, however, had burrowed into the cartilage of her ear. I checked the time — 6 p.m. — and quickly determined that this was a job for which I was not qualified. We headed to a nearby Walgreens Healthcare Clinic, which would stay open until 7 p.m. Grateful to have an after-hours option, I left this tricky tick predicament to an expert! Caitlin Wheeler’s “Diagnosis Destination” feature on page 16 offers advice on where to take your child for various medical conditions. In addition to your pediatrician, nearby urgent care center, hospital or after-hours clinic, you’ll find that there may even be an online solution. We continue our health theme on page 19 with Maureen Churchill’s explanation of how to understand MyChart, a free online service provided by many medical systems. Discover what it is, how it works and why it has become so widely used. Tax season has arrived, and this year marks the first time taxpayers will fully take President Donald Trump’s 2017 Tax Cuts and Jobs Act into account. In “The Trump Tax Code” on page 20, Laura Lacy offers guidance from tax experts on how this legislation may be impacting your family’s finances. Estate planning likely does not top your list of fun family activities, but neglecting to arrange for the inevitable only puts that

EDITOR

Beth Shugg · bshugg@carolinaparent.com

ASSOCIATE EDITOR

Janice Lewine · jlewine@carolinaparent.com

ART DIRECTOR

Sean W. Byrne · seanwbyrne.com

DIGITAL CONTENT DIRECTOR Andy Smith · andy.smith@morris.com

DIGITAL AND SOCIAL MEDIA SPECIALIST Lauren Isaacs · lisaacs@carolinaparent.com

INTERN

Audrey Payne · apayne@carolinaparent.com

burden on someone else after you’re gone. Christa Hogan walks you through the process of estate planning on page 22 in “5 Steps to Creating a Family Will.” You’ll find a brand-new delivery in our column section this month. “Oh, Baby!” debuts on page 27 and focuses on issues related to parenting babies — from infants to toddlers. Our other columns offer tips on helping children set goals (page 24); understanding emotional challenges (page 28); planning for the unexpected (page 29); kicking bad tech habits (page 30); and approaching undergraduate education in preparation for attending medical school (page 31). Take a trip to Savannah in our Excursion column (page 32) and learn about the many tour options from which you can choose while there. Our calendar section starts on page 34 and offers plenty of ways to keep kids busy — indoors and outdoors — during this cold month. Be sure to check out carolinaparent.com for more ideas!

MEDIA CONSULTANTS

Candi Griffin • cgriffin@carolinaparent.com Sue Chen • schen@carolinaparent.com Jen Pieh • jpieh@carolinaparent.com

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SENIOR DIRECTOR OF MARKETING AND PRODUCT DEVELOPMENT Allison Hollins · allison.hollins@morris.com

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DIRECTOR OF PUBLISHING SERVICES KAREN FRALICK

PRODUCTION COORDINATOR CHER WHEELER

carolinaparent.com Phone: 919-956-2430 · Fax: 919-956-2427 5716 Fayetteville Rd., Suite 201, Durham, NC 27713 advertising@carolinaparent.com · editorial@carolinaparent.com Circulation 35,000. Distribution of this magazine does not constitute an endorsement of information, products or services. Carolina Parent reserves the right to reject any advertisement or listing that is not in keeping with the publication’s standards. Copyright 2019. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part without written permission is prohibited.

A Publication of the Visitor Publications Division of Morris Communications Company, L.L.C. 725 Broad St., Augusta, GA 30901 Chairman President & CEO William S. Morris III William S. Morris IV 2018 GOLD

Beth Shugg, Editor

JANUARY 2019 | carolinaparent.com

Editor’s photo courtesy of Morton Photography. First aid kit photo courtesy of gcpics/Shutterstock.com. Cover photo courtesy of Nadezhda1906/iStockPhoto.com.

Chapel Hill Pediatrics

&Adolescents

Welcome NEW and Established Patients • Care from birth through college •Complimentary “meet and greet” sessions • Same-day appointments • Comprehensive sports & camp physicals Come tour our warm and inviting learning community.

Appointment hours

8 am - 5 pm M-F All Locations

Walk in Availability: Chapel Hill Ofﬁce:

7:15-7:50 am and 1-7 pm M-F; 9 am- 2 pm Sat-Sun

Preschool tours: January 4, 15, & 25 Elementary tours: January 8,10, 24 & 29

Durham Office: 7:15 -7:50 am M-F

Sign up online at www.raleighschool.org/admissions or send us an email at admissions@raleighschool.org 1141 Raleigh School Drive | Raleigh, NC 27607 www.raleighschool.org 919-546-0788

COMMUNITY. CHALLENGE. INQUIRY. RESPECT.

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www.chapelhillpeds.com carolinaparent.com | JANUARY 2019

FYI COMMUNITY

BY JANICE LEWINE

National Charity League Mother-Daughter Teams Host Food Drive Members of the National Charity League, Inc.’s Carolina Lily, Cardinal, Dogwood and Photo courtesy of Wrightwork Photography

Longleaf Pine Chapters hosted a food drive on Oct. 28 to support four local philanthropy partners: Food Bank of Central & Eastern North Carolina, Inter-Faith Food Shuttle, Oak City Outreach Center and Raleigh Rescue Mission.

with cleaning supplies and ready-to-eat foods going directly to Hurricane Florence victims. “This event provided the platform for our four chapters to collaborate. We had approximately 200 mothers and daughters joined together to serve people in need in our communities,” says Cassie Roberts, president of the Carolina Lily Chapter. “This food drive was planned well before Hurricane Florence impacted our neighbors in the East, and we’re so pleased to be able to support relief efforts there as well as families in surrounding communities and neighborhoods. We had sister NCL Chapters that were affected as well, so this definitely hit close to home for us.” Learn more at nclcarolinalily.org.

Wake County High School Student Competes in Junior Olympics

More than 375 individuals attended New Orleans Night Oct. 30, 2018, at City Club in downtown Raleigh in support of critically ill children and their families. Organized by

Charles “Omar” McBride, a senior at Apex High School, was one

the Me Fine Foundation, the masquerade-

of seven U.S. athletes and the only U.S. high jumper representing

themed gala raised $220,000 to provide

the Americas in October at the American Association of Athletics

financial resources and emotional support

Federation’s Junior Olympics in Buenos Aires, an international

to families with children receiving

competition. McBride finished ninth in the high jump. He is the

treatment at WakeMed, UNC Hospitals and

reigning national outdoor high jump champion with a personal

Duke Children’s Hospital. The nonprofit

record of jumping 7¼ feet. Only two other high jumpers in North

also assists these families with major life

Carolina’s history have been able to clear 7 feet. McBride plans to

expenses in situations where a lack of

compete in the North Carolina High School Athletic Association’s

payment may put them at risk for eviction,

state track and field championship May 10-11 in Greensboro and

food insecurity or utility disconnection.

says participating in the 2028 Summer Olympics in Los Angeles is

“Our annual gala ensures that we can

a long-range goal. He recently signed with Campbell University to compete as a member of the school’s track and field team.

meet the constant flow of referrals from our hospital partners to address the individual needs of families in crisis,” says Joey Powell, Me Fine Foundation’s executive director. “Through the generous outpouring of support from attendees at last night’s event, we will be able to do even more for families today and in the future.” Learn more at mefinefoundation.org.

JANUARY 2019 | carolinaparent.com

FINANCIAL IMPACT ON FAMILIES DURING A CHILD’S HEALTH CRISIS

3 5 out of every

The number of personal bankruptcies that are a byproduct of medical debt. SOURCE: mefinefoundation.org

$6,500 The average daily cost for room and board at a pediatric critical care unit.

13 in

The number of families with children who will experience financial burden due to medical care.

Photo courtesy of the McBride family

Me Fine Foundation Raises $220,000 for Critically Ill Children

Photo courtesy of the National Charity League

This year marked the third joint philanthropy effort to collect, sort and package nonperishable foods, along with hygiene and cleaning supplies. More than 65 boxes were delivered to the four organizations,

For the Smile Of a Lifetime... Now Accepting New Patients! 919.489.1543 DurhamPDO.com

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carolinaparent.com | JANUARY 2019

FYI

Students from Hillside High School and City of Medicine Academy in Durham were selected to perform on stage prior to a November performance of “Hamilton: An American Musical” in Charlotte. City of Medicine senior Gianni Lacey-Howard opened the day of student performances with her original rap about the Declaration of Independence. Soon after, three students from Hillside High School’s acting troupe ONE VOICE — Jalen McKoy, Daniella Ochman and Emani Eaglin — performed a two-minute scene about the “Women of Hamilton.” Hillside High School and City of Medicine Academy joined other North Carolina schools selected for the special performance through an educational partnership formed by “Hamilton” producers, The Rockefeller Foundation, the New York City Department of Education and the Gilder Lehrman Institute of American History. Led by City of Medicine Academy U.S. history teacher Tracey Barrett, 100 of the school’s students attended the performance in Charlotte and took a college tour the next day. Hillside High School history teacher Alex Christman worked with theatre director Wendell Tabb to involve the school’s drama students, who were also a part of his history class in the project.

Apex Friendship Middle School Students Participate in Breakfast Taste Tests

WCPSS Child Nutrition Services marked National School Lunch Week 2018 (Oct. 15-19) with a series of student taste tests. Paula DeLucca and her WCPSS Child Nutrition Services leadership team visited brand-new Apex Friendship Middle School, where sixth-graders sampled a breakfast flatbread, bacon-and-

cheese frittata, breakfast pizza bagel with southern gravy and sausage, and protein-packed breakfast boat. Students ranked each sample with a green, yellow or red card to indicate opinions of each choice. All four items tested exceeded an approval rating of 80 percent, and the frittata and

flatbread received unanimous approval. Jennifer Okurtz of WCPSS Child Nutrition Services says they will consider this feedback along with responses from other taste tests to determine additional items to add to breakfast menus across the school system. These taste tests enable WCPSS Child Nutrition Services to provide flavorful, healthy breakfasts and lunches to students that will enhance wellness and academic success. Food and drink items available to students in schools are aligned with the meal pattern established by the U.S. Department of Agriculture and dietary specifications that include limits on fats, sodium and calories.

Wake County Public School System Names Principal of the Year

Will Chavis, principal of Enloe Magnet High School, who holds a doctorate in education, was named 2018-19 Principal of the Year for Wake County Public

JANUARY 2019 | carolinaparent.com

School System in a celebration held Oct. 4. Since being named principal of Enloe Magnet High School in 2016, Chavis has worked to create administrative, teacher, student and parent equity teams focused on reducing disparities, and improving outcomes and experiences for students. Thanks to this work, Enloe Magnet High School’s graduation rate has climbed to 92.6 percent, a 9.5 percentage-point increase in two years. In just the past year, grade-level proficiency on End of Course tests has increased by 5.1 percent while career and college readiness proficiency increased by 6.3 percent.

Enrollment in Advanced Placement courses at Enloe Magnet High School has increased by 130 percent, and suspensions have decreased by nearly 40 percent in the past two years. And in 2017-18, the school exceeded growth, after not having met growth for two years prior. According to WCPSS, Chavis bases his leadership strategy on evaluating and assessing school culture and climate, digging into student data, amplifying student voices, and engaging parents and the broader community to support the school’s diverse student population and encourage school improvement.

Photo of Will Chavis courtesy of Wake County Public School System

Durham Public Schools Students Perform in Charlotte Through ‘Hamilton’ Educational Program

BY KAREN SHORE

Photo courtesy of WCPSS

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FYI HEALTH

BY KATHERINE KOPP

Consider a Mediterranean Diet for Good Health If you would like to modify your diet in 2019

• Eating fish and poultry at least twice a week.

to improve your health, the Mayo Clinic

• Enjoying meals with family and friends.

recommends considering a Mediterranean diet,

• Drinking red wine in moderation

which emphasizes:

(optional).

• Eating primarily plant-based foods, such as fruits and vegetables, whole grains,

The Mediterranean diet is associated with a reduced incidence of cancer and of

• Replacing butter with healthy fats, such as olive oil and canola oil. • Using herbs and spices instead of salt to flavor foods.

Parkinson’s and Alzheimer’s diseases. Women who eat a Mediterranean diet supplemented with extra-virgin olive oil and mixed nuts may have a reduced risk of breast cancer.

• Limiting the consumption of red meat to no more than a few times a month.

For more information, go to mayoclinic.org and search for “Mediterranean diet.”

American Academy of Pediatrics Issues Statement on Spanking The American Academy of Pediatrics recently

Digital Resources Offering Medical Advice

released a policy statement saying that children do not benefit from spanking. Spanking is defined as “non-injurious, open-handed hitting with the

Looking for reliable sources of accurate and

Photo courtesy of Dmitry Lobanov/ Shutterstock.com

intention of modifying child behavior.”

verifiable medical advice online? Here are a

The policy recommends that pediatricians

few suggestions (and check out “Diagnosis

advise against spanking, replacing a 20-year-old

Destination” on page 16 for more):

guidance that recommended that pediatricians “encourage” parents not to spank. A 2016 analysis

associated with increased aggression and makes

of multiple studies found that children do not

it more likely for children to express defiance in

benefit from spanking, as it does not appear to be

the future. Learn more at aap.org.

successful in modifying behavior. Recent studies have also shown that corporal punishment is

SOURCE: American Academy of Pediatrics, Nov. 5, 2018

BY THE NUMBERS:

1.3%

The percentage of children born in 2015 who did not receive any of the vaccines recommended by the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. This is an increase from 0.9 percent of children born in 2011. In 2001, only 0.3 percent of children ages 19-35 months were totally unvaccinated. These statistics suggest that there are now more than 100,000 children nationwide who are not inoculated against preventable diseases such as measles, chicken pox, pertussis (whooping cough) and hepatitis B.

SOURCE: U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention

JANUARY 2019 | carolinaparent.com

familydoctor.org: Backed by the American Academy of Family Physicians, the site has a Symptom Checker that asks questions to help you narrow down a possible diagnosis for a health issue, offering some general advice or recommendations to seek medical care. KidsDoc: This American Academy of Pediatrics app costs $2 to download and offers diagnostic information focused on children. MedlinePlus: Co-run by the National Institutes of Health, this website offers in-depth information on diagnoses if you need more information on specific diseases and disorders. Katherine Kopp is a freelance writer in Chapel Hill.

Photo courtesy of Silvastrings/ Shutterstock.com

Image courtesy of Double Brain/ Shutterstock.com

legumes and nuts.

• Getting plenty of exercise.

JANUARY

Come Celebrate your Smile with us!

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development and STEAM education skills by allowing children and adults to transform photos taken by their digital devices into a sketch. This collection of fun sticker books will encourage kids to use their creativity in a variety of ways.

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• Abby’s Garden Planting Activity Set • Avery Dreamworks Trolls Collection makes it possible for kids to watch is the perfect way to replenish school supplies at this halfway nature at work while growing their point of the academic year. very own garden. • The smART sketcher Projector promotes artistic ability, fine motor

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Diagnosis Destination

Where to take your child for illnesses, injuries and accidents BY CAITLIN WHEELER

our son fell out of a tree house and hit his head. He is conscious, but groggy. Do you call 911? It’s the middle of the night and your daughter is coughing so much she can’t sleep. Do you pack her into the car and rush to the emergency room, or make her as comfortable as you can and wait until your pediatrician’s office opens in the morning? In stressful moments, making a quick judgment call about where to seek help can be daunting. Do you head to the ER, urgent care, your pediatrician — or can you find the information you need through an online doctor? Before you decide, consider the pros and cons of your options. EMERGENCY ROOM When there’s blood, or a moaning child, many parents choose to take their child to the ER out of pure panic. And, according to Dr. Clay Bordley, M.D., an associate professor of pediatrics and chief of the Division of Pediatric Emergency Medicine at Duke University Medical Center, this can absolutely be the right choice. “If the issue is truly life-threatening, you will be seen efficiently and quickly, and you will have access to all the resources the hospital has to offer,” Bordley says, adding that Duke University Medical Center, like UNC Medical Center

JANUARY 2019 | carolinaparent.com

and other hospitals in North Carolina, have a special pediatrics unit of emergency care. On the other hand, if the ER triage determines your child is not in immediate danger, you may have to wait for hours. And, “the waiting area can be less than pleasant, especially on a Friday or Saturday night, when there can be some drunkenness and unruly behavior,” Bordley says. You might also see some unsightly injuries, which can be upsetting to a child. “We’ve built some of our own problems,” Bordley says. “There are no appointments needed, you don’t have to pay for anything up front and there’s valet parking. It’s certainly an expensive way to provide care.” He adds that “in the heat of the moment” parents are thinking about their child, not about how much a trip to the ER costs our health care system. “We absolutely get that,” he says. And, if you do bring your child to the ER, he adds, he or she will get high-quality care — it “just may take a while”. URGENT CARE “Urgent care can be a great option,” says Dr. Ty Bristol, M.D., pediatrician and medical director at UNC Pediatrics of Panther Creek in Cary. These centers offer extended hours and other resources a pediatrician’s office won’t have, like medication to treat serious

asthma attacks, X-ray equipment and the ability to stitch minor wounds. Like the ER, urgent care staff will triage patients — and take those who have the most serious health issues first. So again, there may be a wait. If you go to an urgent care center (or the ER), just make sure you let your regular pediatrician know about the visit. “You and your pediatrician are partners,” Bristol says. “A pediatrician will see the bigger picture. You might go to the UC for a urine infection and promptly get the medicine you need, but the UC doctor might completely overlook an issue of ongoing constipation, which might have caused the infection.” PEDIATRICIAN Dr. Martha Perry, M.D., medical director of the UNC Children’s Primary Care Clinic in Chapel Hill, says the “majority of the care that kids need can be found in their pediatrician’s office.” The primary difference between taking a child to the ER or urgent care center and your child’s pediatrician is the long-term relationship you ideally develop with your pediatrician. Such a relationship, Perry says, addresses “whole health” issues and should lead to preventative rather than ameliorative care. “If a pediatrician sees the emergency situation, [he or she] can look at all of the

Image courtesy of FCSCAFEINE/Shutterstock.com

child’s records to understand whether it’s a one-time illness or a pattern or long-term condition,” she says. “They can also help with recovery, strengthening and rehab.” Being available to patients is an important part of addressing whole health issues. Perry notes that many pediatric offices offer expanded hours that include the availability of walk-in visits during weekends. ON-CALL PROFESSIONALS Increasingly, there are other off-hour options as well. Private on-call doctors and nurses are available to come to your house. Nurse practitioner Tiffany Lightner Menist of Branch Out Pediatrics PLLC in Charlotte chose to leave a large practice after 10 years because she wanted to make a more personal connection with her patients. While she encourages patients to visit pediatricians for annual checkups and vaccinations, she can take care of everything from sports physicals to strep throat and asthma treatments. Menist limits the number of families she sees in order to establish deeper connections with her patients and respond quickly to their needs. Home visits, she says, decrease anxiety for everyone. “Parents don’t have to pack all their kids into the car, and sick kids can stay in their PJs in their own bed,” she says. Home visits can be particularly great for new mothers who may want to avoid exposing their newborns to other sick kids. Insurance typically won’t cover this type of practice, but Menist says her patients appreciate the lack of paperwork and simplicity of an upfront payment. TELEHEALTH If you’re comfortable with technology and your child has a non-urgent medical issue, consider a telehealth company. This online health care option allows you to schedule a call or video conference with a board-certified physician at any time, from any place. One such option is UNC Urgent Care 24/7, a partnership between UNC Hospitals and MDLIVE, a Floridabased telehealth company that has been in business since 2009. While MDLIVE physicians can’t staunch bleeding or set

broken bones, they can evaluate a child for flu, pink eye, ear infections, insect bites and rashes, to name a few of the 50 or so illnesses they typically treat. And they can prescribe certain basic medications. “You can’t pick a time when you’re sick,” says Michelle Rider, senior vice president of marketing at MDLIVE. “Our app is affordable, easy to use and great for an illness that strikes off-hours, like over the weekend, in the middle of the night, or when you’re on vacation, far away from your usual pediatrician.” Again, it’s best to inform your pediatrician when any of your child’s health issues are addressed outside of the office. Rider points out that upon request, MDLIVE will provide physician notes to your regular pediatrician following a virtual appointment. For more information, visit uncurgentcare247.com or mdlive.com. ONLINE RESOURCES When asked about the reliability of online medical resources, Bristol cautions that while some sites can be helpful, there’s “plenty of questionable advice out there.” Bristol, Bordley and Perry all agree that the American Academy of Pediatrics’ website, aap.org, is a reliable source of online information. Perry says the AAP has endorsed healthychildren.org, kidshealth.org and mayoclinic.org. Bristol suggests sharing the information you find online with your doctor and asking him or her what he or she thinks. WHEN IN DOUBT “If you are in doubt, and you feel you have time, the best thing to do is to call your pediatrician’s office,” Bristol says. Most practices have a nurse triage line, as well as an on-call pediatrician. These nurses are trained to determine the severity of your child’s situation and can recommend a course of action over the phone. “It’s impossible for a parent to understand all the nuances of an illness,” Bristol says. Perry adds that a nurse or doctor can often walk a parent through what he or she needs to do to prevent a visit to the ER, which is ultimately better for everyone.

WHERE TO GO FOR COMMON AILMENTS Here are some common ailments and where medical professionals suggest you go for treatment. NOTE: Newborns under the age of 3 months with any kind of health issue should be seen promptly. Urgent care centers typically don’t offer pediatric expertise for this age group, so be sure to call in advance, consult your pediatrician and, when necessary, go to the ER. Fever Dr. Clay Bordley, M.D., an associate professor of pediatrics and chief of the Division of Pediatric Emergency Medicine at Duke University Medical Center, says fever is one of the most common reasons parents take a child to the ER and yet, he adds, it is rarely an emergency. “It’s not the number on the thermometer, it's how the child looks and whether it’s combined with another serious symptom,” he says. Infants are a special case. While a 104-degree fever may simply mean your 5-year-old’s immune system is at work, a fever of even 100 degrees can indicate a serious infection in an infant. If your child’s fever is accompanied by other symptoms, such as crying, which may signal pain; stiffness or unresponsiveness; or if a fever lasts longer than several days, call your physician. If your child’s fever responds well to pain relievers and he has had the fever for only a couple of days, keep your child comfortable and well hydrated, and give your pediatrician a call if you have any concerns. Respiratory Issues If a child’s airway is even partially blocked and he is choking, turning blue or otherwise having trouble breathing, he needs to be seen

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Breaks, Sprains and Fractures Bordley says the ER works closely with local urgent care sites to cover varying degrees of bone injuries. Most of these centers have X-ray equipment and the expertise to deal with minor breaks. If there is an obvious fracture — e.g., the bone is pointing in the wrong direction or has punctured the skin — you will need to go to the ER. An ER should have specialists who can deal with repair, as well as anesthesiologists to provide sedation for children as needed. If the injury is painful or swollen and doesn’t seem to improve after a day or two, call your pediatrician. While pediatric offices don’t usually accommodate X-ray equipment, Bristol says some pediatricians will look at photographs via text message of the injury and be able to suggest the next best step. If the injury is swollen and bruised, but your child is able to put weight on it or otherwise use it, then ice the injury on and off for the first few hours and keep it elevated. Call your doctor’s office for further advice about wrapping it and keeping it immobilized. Neurological Issues Bordley advises calling 911 or going straight to the ER if your child hits her head and is unconscious or nonresponsive, throwing up repeatedly, disoriented, has severe headaches or displays personality changes. If your child is experiencing a minor concussion, an urgent care physician

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or your pediatrician can perform a neurological and cognitive checkup to assess whether she needs additional care at a hospital. Stomach Issues/Poisoning If you suspect your child has swallowed something hazardous (e.g., a small battery, cleaning liquid, unauthorized medication, etc.), and is unconscious or having convulsions or seizures, call 911. If you think your child has swallowed something hazardous but does not appear to have any reaction, call Poison Control immediately at 800-222-1222, or call 911. If your child’s stomach pain is severe and accompanied by fever, vomiting, difficulty breathing or lightheadedness, call your pediatrician or head to the urgent care. If your child has a stomachache but is able to keep down fluids, keep him or her home for observation. If the pain persists, call your pediatrician. Skin Issues/Bleeding Head to the ER if an accident, animal bite or other injury causes extensive damage or uncontrolled bleeding, or if your child has an allergic reaction to a bug bite or sting, or an infection from an animal bite. Rashes accompanied by a high fever should also be addressed in the ER. An urgent care center is a good place to go for minor cuts that need stitching. However, most centers are not pediatricspecific and do not provide anesthetics. Typically, a pediatrician’s office does not provide stitching for cuts (call in advance to find out). Your pediatrician's office is a good place to go for a rash or other recurring skin conditions. RECURRING MEDICAL ISSUES If you find yourself repeatedly relying on the ER or the urgent care center for your child’s recurring health issue, consider a different approach. While it is vital to get your child’s breathing under control

if he has a severe asthma attack or allergic reaction, a visit to the ER is only a temporary solution. Dr. Sheila Kilbane, M.D., an integrative medical practitioner in Charlotte, suggests looking at a child’s diet, allergies and personal environment to come up with a whole health solution. Kilbane takes a limited number of patients, which allows her to conduct thorough testing to identify the “trigger” for a child’s medical issue. She says she enjoys the detective work, combing through records and getting to know her patients as she solves each problem, and she has had great success in treating issues such as colic, reflux, ear infections, eczema, constipation, allergies and asthma. Most of Kilbane’s patients adopt an anti-inflammatory diet. “It is important to address what’s going on in the gut,” she says. “Research on the microbiome is exploding and, with a lot of these illnesses, research shows it’s triggered by food sensitivity. Dairy and eggs are a big culprit.” Kilbane also finds issues that exist in a child’s environment, whether this ends up being dust mites in a mattress, or an allergy to local vegetation. She typically works with a patient for about a year. “Once we’ve found the underlying trigger and reduced the symptoms through diet and environmental control, the patient goes back to relying on their pediatrician and continuing with the integrative solution on their own.” Insurance does not usually cover integrative health services, and Kilbane knows this makes it difficult for some families, so she has published “Healthy Kids Happy Moms: A Step-by-Step Guide to Improving Many Common Childhood Illnessses” and offers several online courses on her website, sheilakilbane.com. Caitlin Wheeler is a Parenting Media Association gold-winning freelance writer who lives in Durham.

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immediately. Call 911 for assistance or head to the ER. Most urgent care sites can help with illnesses that are not life-threatening, such as asthma attacks, pneumonia, bronchitis, strep throat and other upper respiratory issues. If coughing, congestion or chest pain make breathing uncomfortable for your child, call and/or schedule a visit with your pediatrician.

Understanding MyChart What it is and how it works BY MAUREEN CHURCHILL

yChart is a free service provided by many medical providers that gives patients personalized access to portions of their medical information. It also serves as a direct line of communication through which patients can interact with their doctors. MyChart accounts can be accessed via a secure portal 24/7 from any location with internet access. MyChart allows users to: • Make and cancel medical appointments. • Communicate with their doctors about non-urgent needs. • View the results of some medical tests, usually available one business day after results are available to medical staff. • Complete paperwork before appointments. • Read notes from office visits. • Request prescription refills. • Pay medical bills. Each medical system has its own version of MyChart. Patients need to request an activation code from their provider in order to sign up and begin using MyChart. This can be done either in person at your next appointment or by calling a customer service number for assistance, which most medical systems offer. For example: • Duke Health Customer Service: 919-626-9037 or 919-351-8576 • UNC HealthLink: 888-996-2767 • WakeMed HelpDesk: 919-350-2288

SHARING ACCESS VIA PROXY ACCOUNTS MyChart accounts are specific to one person and information cannot be shared unless permission is requested and granted. If you would like access to another person’s medical information, you will need a proxy account. Proxy accounts are available for parents and guardians of children under the age of 18, for adult family members (for example, if you wanted to share access to your records with your spouse), and for friends and incapacitated adults. A request from the person wishing to share his or her information must be made in order to allow someone else access to the information via a proxy account. Keep in mind that you must have your own MyChart account with the same provider in order to request a proxy account. Currently, a parent with multiple children will need to log in separately to view and access information in each child’s MyChart account. Developers are working on a solution to link sibling accounts together in order to make it easier for parents to manage all of their children’s accounts from one login. MYCHART FOR TEENS MyChart accounts for teens have been created to help engage them in their health care, as well as to increase communication between them, their family and their doctors. Teens are defined as children between the ages of 12 and 17. The information that can be displayed legally in MyChart to parents and guardians who have proxy accounts

set up for their teens is very limited due to North Carolina privacy laws — namely North Carolina law G.S. 90-21.4(b) — regarding the disclosure of information without a minor’s consent. Parents or guardians cannot view data about past appointments, test results, letters or most other communications from the physician’s office. This law was established because there are certain medical issues that minors can see a doctor about without parental consent, including sexually transmitted infections, pregnancy, mental health concerns and substance abuse. It has been reported that minors are more likely to seek help with these issues when they can do so with privacy. A PHYSICIAN’S PERSPECTIVE According to Dr. Hillary Lockemer, M.D., of WakeMed Physicians Practices, approximately 31 percent of WakeMed patients are currently using MyChart. She says her favorite feature of MyChart is “being able to answer my patient’s questions in a timely and efficient manner.” Thanks to MyChart, Lockemer is often able to have completely secure, real-time conversations — almost like texting — with her patients. Instead of having to carve out time at the end of the day to answer emails and return phone calls, she can check MyChart between appointments and respond quickly to questions and concerns. MyChart should be used for routine communication with your medical providers. If a situation requires immediate attention, call 911 or visit the nearest emergency room.

Check Apple’s App store or Google’s Play store to download a free version of your provider’s MyChart app on your phone. Maureen Churchill lives in Durham with her husband and son. Learn more about her at carolinaparent.com/cp/blogs/main/ searching-for-balance. carolinaparent.com | JANUARY 2019

The Trump Tax Code

How the 2017 Tax Cuts and Jobs Act may impact your family budget BY LAURA LACY

FEWER EXEMPTIONS BUT HIGHER DEDUCTIONS The Tax Cuts and Jobs Act nixed the personal and dependent exemptions many taxpayers have used in the past to reduce their taxable income, but higher deduction amounts may balance this out. Edwards explains that before the new law was passed, the personal and dependent exemption “was $4,050, but you multiply that by the number of taxpayers on the returns, and for a married couple that would be two, and also however many dependents they had,” she says. “So a large family would’ve had a very large reduction in their income, potentially, for this personal dependency exemption, and now it’s going to zero.” While that, on its face, might seem financially detrimental to families, the bill’s deductions component might take out some of the sting.

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“Balancing that somewhat is the fact that, in this tax reform bill, the standard deduction amount, which is separate and apart from personal dependency exemptions, was almost doubled for all taxpayers,” Edwards says. In 2017 a married couple filing jointly could claim a standard deduction of $12,700. If they were instead considering claiming itemized deductions, such as charitable donations, mortgage interest, etc., the total of those deductions would have had to exceed $12,700 to make their taxable income lower than it would have been had they just taken the standard deduction. In 2018, however, the standard deduction for a married couple rose to $24,000, Edwards points out. This could alter how some families approach their taxes this year, says David T. Dufault, an estate planning and business law attorney with Sodoma Law in Charlotte. There are “a certain number of people who are going to fall into that group where they’ve itemized for years, but now the standard deduction is going to be more beneficial because they get a bigger deduction against income.” THE CHILD TAX CREDIT INCREASE Another component of President Trump’s Tax Cuts and Jobs Act that especially affects families is the rising child tax credit for any child under age 17 (ages 16 and younger). Previous tax laws included a child tax credit, but the new bill raises the phaseout ceiling. Dufault explains. “You would take a credit against the actual taxes that you owed,” he says. “Under the new law, that credit has been doubled from $1,000 to $2,000 per child.”

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ax season is here, and it’s the first time taxpayers will fully take President Donald Trump’s 2017 Tax Cuts and Jobs Act into account as they file their taxes this year. Signed into law in December 2017, the Tax Cuts and Jobs Act was the ‘largest tax overhaul since 1986,” according to the Tax Policy Center report, “Effects of the Tax Cuts and Jobs Act: A Preliminary Analysis.” The far-reaching consequences of the law have yet to be seen, but there are some aspects of the new tax codes that families should pay particular attention to. “There are things inside this tax reform bill that will, of course, affect families, certainly depending on how many children they have, how high their income is and … whether they claim the standard deduction or not,” says Courtney Edwards, associate director of the UNC Tax Center in Chapel Hill, established by the UNC Kenan-Flagler Business School. A draft of the new 1040 form shows it will be a smaller, postcardsized document that the Trump administration promises will simplify and shorten the filing process. What else do you need to know as you prepare to file? North Carolina tax experts weigh in.

That’s not the only benefit to the new child tax credit, Edwards points out. The previous child tax credit was subject to a phaseout. “A phaseout just means it’s slowly reduced as income gets higher, so that the benefit ultimately can be just completely wiped out,” he says. “That phaseout doesn’t kick in until the taxpayer’s income is over $400,000 (for joint filers) — and it used to be $110,000.” (The phaseout limit is $200,000 for all other taxpayers.) So, more families can benefit from the credit now that the income threshold for the phaseout has been raised. Additionally, a $500 “family credit” has been added for dependents not eligible for the child tax credit, a new feature of the Tax Cuts and Jobs Act. To find out if you have qualifying dependents in your house, visit forbes.com (search for “When Seniors Become Dependents”). Need help determining if your child qualifies for the child tax credit? The IRS offers an online tool that can help you determine that at irs.gov/help/ita/is-my-child-a-qualifying-child-for-the-childtax-credit. CHANGES TO 529 PLANS Many parents choose to fund their child’s education with a 529 plan. In North Carolina, there’s no limit to the amount a parent, grandparent, other relative or family friend can put in the account. But in previous years, funds could only be withdrawn tax-free to pay for college, says H. Lee Miller, a Raleigh-based CPA. “Starting this year, they can also be used for tuition at elementary or secondary, public, private or religious schools up to $10,000 a year, whereas before you couldn’t take the money out of it, or if you did, you were taxed on it,” he says. FINDING RESOURCES TO HELP Dufault warns that some taxpayers who historically have gotten a refund or owed very little taxes might see a higher tax bill this year regarding changes in withholdings. He advises taxpayers to plug their information into the online withholdings calculator at apps.irs.gov/app/withholdingcalculator to avoid any surprises come April 15. Feeling a little overwhelmed with all of this information? Both Dufault and Edwards say professional guidance is worth considering as you navigate the changes. “I do think that because there is some uncertainty this year, and because we’re going to be faced with what appears to be a whole new set of [tax] forms, ... this might be a time when families or taxpayers who traditionally did their own taxes might get some benefit from reaching out to a tax professional just to make sure that they’re doing it right — and [to] make sure that they’re not missing anything,” Dufault says. Edwards agrees. “In this first year, I think talking — to the extent it’s possible— to a trusted advisor is always a good idea,” he says. “Because there are a lot of moving parts in this reform bill that affects families and non-families alike.” Laura Lacey is a freelance writer in Chapel Hill.

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5 Steps to Creating a Family Will Check estate planning off your 2019 to-do list BY CHRISTA C. HOGAN

f making a will has languished for years on your to-do list, you’re not alone. A 2017 study conducted by Caring.com, an online resource for caregivers, found that 6 in 10 adults in the U.S. don’t have an estate plan in place. Unfortunately, this leaves millions of Americans struggling each year with expensive and complicated arrangements on behalf of deceased loved ones. Making a will is especially important for parents, who may otherwise leave the care of their children up to the courts and protective services if they die intestate, or without a will. So here’s how to start off 2019 with more peace of mind and a family estate plan in place.

and wishes — and can take several weeks to prepare and finalize. Many estate planners offer a free initial consultation, when they can advise you on your needs and estimate costs.

1. CHOOSE YOUR ESTATE PLANNERS. Although you can use online legal resources and go it alone, you’ll benefit greatly from experienced estate planners, advises the National Institute of Certified Estate Planners. NICEP suggests working with a team that includes an attorney and a financial adviser who can help you avoid costly mistakes. For recommendations, talk to friends and family who have created a will and visit nicep.org. Creating an estate plan can cost anywhere from several hundred to several thousand dollars — depending on your assets

• Provide a stable home environment. • Raise your children with the values you hold most strongly. • Meet the physical challenge of raising kids. • Make sound decisions regarding your children’s futures.

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2. SELECT A GUARDIAN. A guardian will be responsible for the care and raising of your children in your absence. Selecting a guardian for your children might be one of the toughest decisions you’ll make, says attorney Liza Hanks, author of “The Mom’s Guide to Wills & Estate Planning.” You’ll want to consider whether or not the guardian you choose is able to:

Still having trouble choosing a guardian? Hanks advises choosing someone who is the best fit for the present time and re-evaluating your choice every five years. Once you’ve decided on a guardian, you’ll need to speak to that person. Make sure he or she fully

3. CHOOSE AN EXECUTOR AND/OR TRUSTEE. An executor will carry out your wishes as expressed in your will. He or she is also responsible for winding down your affairs, and will use estate funds to pay off any outstanding financial obligations and mediate disputes among heirs. According to the American Bar Association, choosing an executor to carry out a will may save families the unnecessary costs and time involved with bonds and court supervision. To select an executor, choose a trusted, responsible person familiar with your affairs. A trustee is responsible for the execution of a trust. Parents of minor children may place their assets in a trust to be distributed to their children according to specific guidelines. When choosing a trustee, be aware that your trustee may be involved in the process for months or even decades, depending on the directives in the will and ages of your children. 4. MAKE IMPORTANT HEALTH CARE DECISIONS. A will conveys your wishes in the event of your death, but what if you’re injured and unable to communicate your wishes? According to the North Carolina Bar Association, North Carolina residents can use a living will and health care power of attorney to make decisions regarding medical treatments. Consider whether you want to incorporate life-prolonging measures if you suffer from a serious injury or illness that leaves you unable to communicate your wishes. You can also appoint a health care power of attorney to make these decisions on your behalf, should you be unable to do so. 5. GATHER PAPERWORK. You’ll need to provide your estate planner with a number of important documents, according to LegalZoom.com, an online legal services resource. These documents might include real estate deeds, vehicle titles and recent statements associated with your bank accounts and investments. Your estate planners may also ask for a list of your outstanding debts, including mortgages, car loans and credit cards. To designate beneficiaries to receive any of your assets, such as investments and retirement savings, you’ll need to provide their full names, accurate contact information and Social Security numbers. You may also need to provide a copy of your minor children’s birth or adoption certificates. Creating a will is an important step in securing your family’s future. Make 2019 the year you put your wishes in writing with a solid estate plan.

LEGAL GLOSSARY Estate: The assets and liabilities of a deceased or bankrupt person. Executor: A person who is named to carry out the details of a will. Guardian: A person legally placed in charge of the affairs of a minor or person of unsound mind. Health Care Power of Attorney: A person designated to be the representative, or agent, of someone who is unable to make or communicate decisions about all aspects of his or her health care. Probate: The official legal process of proving that a will is valid, and of distributing the property and carrying out the actions as directed by the will. Power of Attorney: The authority to act on behalf of a person in certain legal and financial matters. Trust: An arrangement by which property is put under the ownership and control of a person (trustee) who bears the responsibility of administering it for the benefit of another (beneficiary). Will: The legal statement of a person’s wishes concerning the distribution of his or her property after death. SOURCE: Webster’s New World College Dictionary and LegalZoom.com

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appreciates the responsibility and is prepared to follow your wishes to the best of his or her ability.

Christa C. Hogan is a local writer for kids and adults, and a mom to three boys.

carolinaparent.com | JANUARY 2019

GROWING UP

Mission Ambition

Helping children set and achieve goals BY MALIA JACOBSON

s parents and caregivers, we all have goals for the kids in our care — from building healthy habits like daily exercise, to hitting big milestones like a state championship. The most meaningful goals, however, are the ones children set for themselves. According to research published by the Association for Psychological Science, working toward goals helps build important skills like resourcefulness, problem-solving and autonomy. Parents’ enthusiasm to encourage kids toward their goals can sometimes go awry, and caregivers may use negative, counterproductive or even damaging strategies in a quest for achievement. Here are some ways caregivers can help children nurture the skills they need to set and reach goals large and small — now, and for years to come.

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EARLY YEARS Gold Star Toddlers and preschoolers may be ready to begin working toward goals with the help of adults in their lives — think small, achievable milestones in keeping with tots’ physical and emotional capabilities. Tasks like learning to get dressed or making the bed are within the grasp of many 4-year-olds, while more complex skills, like tying shoes, might be years away. Caregivers often use rewards to help young children reach goals, which can be effective when done properly, says licensed

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therapist and accredited Positive Parenting Program coach Lakisha Harris of Harris Counseling and Coaching in Charlotte. “Rewards are effective when a child is aware of what is expected and advised of what the reward will be in advance, as well as the consequence for not achieving the goal,” Harris says. Don’t confuse bribes for rewards, Harris warns. By offering a short-term reward for compliance, bribes teach children that they only need to perform when they get something in return.

ELEMENTARY YEARS Visual Aid School-age kids have lots of opportunities to set goals — from mastering a 10-speed bike to earning a top score in math. But building the internal motivation and persistence required to reach these goals doesn’t happen overnight. Parents can encourage growth by helping children break goals into smaller, more manageable tasks, Harris says. After each smaller goal is met, ask children how they feel about their achievement (“Do you feel proud of yourself?”) to build inner motivation and self-esteem. Visualization is another powerful tool to help kids work toward goals, says Anita Lesko, a registered nurse, author and national expert on neuroplasticity.

“Visualization and neuroplasticity can help children build a lasting foundation for a successful future,” Lesko says. To use visualization at home, help kids settle into a quiet space without electronic distractions. After breaking down a goal into smaller steps, ask kids to visualize themselves achieving each smaller goal, along with the final, larger goal. Ask kids how they’ll feel when they reach their final goal. Drawing, painting, or creating a collage of themselves achieving their goal enhances the exercise and serves as a lasting visual cue.

TEEN YEARS Help, Don’t Hover As kids grow into teenagers, goals get bigger and stakes get higher. Objectives like getting into college, landing an internship or winning a scholarship are indeed significant. Achieving these goals can have a lasting impact on a teen’s transition into adulthood. It’s understandable that parents often step in to help steer teens toward important achievements, but experts say the weighty goals of adolescence are objectives that teens should mostly navigate on their own, with parents serving as guides instead of steering the course themselves. Parents can encourage skill-building by asking teens to develop a work plan for larger goals, like preparing to take the SAT or applying to colleges, with required parental check-ins along the way, Harris suggests. “By giving teens the opportunity to develop their own plan, parents are comforted knowing they have check-in times for accountability. It is also very helpful for parents to talk with their teen about challenges, and some possible solutions for resolving each ahead of time,” she adds. Guiding teens toward their goals without pushing paves the way for teens to feel an incredible sense of achievement once those goals are met, which, for parents, is the best reward of all. Malia Jacobson is an award-winning health and family journalist.

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OH, BABY!

MOV E MOV EMENT, OPPORT UNI T Y, VARI E T Y AND EXPERIENCE The cornerstones of healthy motor skill development BY REBECCA QUINONES AND RACHEL GANDY

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s adults, we know what we need to do to stay healthy — be active, eat well and get plenty of rest. As parents, we encourage these habits in our children as well. Physical activity is important for the entire family — even our infants. During the first year of life, an infant works on developing gross motor skills and, through this process, strengthens muscles, builds bones, stimulates the senses and learns how to move. The trial and error of early movement and independence, developed by learning how to move, builds an infant’s confidence and sets the foundation for a lifetime of movement. ENCOURAGE MOVEMENT We can encourage movement in our babies by providing a stimulating environment for them and interacting with them. The way we hold our babies, the positions we put them in, the equipment they spend time in and the toys we give them to interact with can all influence the ways our babies learn to move. When parents help infants strengthen their muscles from early on,

this assists them with learning to roll, sit, crawl, stand and walk, which builds the foundation for playing sports, dancing and exercising as they grow up. PROVIDE OPPORTUNITIES Babies have an innate drive to move. When we give them opportunities to move without containment, and allow them to spend time in different positions, we allow them the freedom to learn about their world from a new perspective. Avoid exposing them to a prolonged time in anything that restricts their movement. Rather than focusing on spending one extended period working with our babies, we should offer them various opportunities to be uncontained and play throughout the day. These small moments add up, providing babies with a rich experience of practice and learning. FACILITATE VARIETY For infants, variety is the spice of life, just as it is for adults. When babies spend time on their backs, it helps them strengthen muscles differently than spending time on

their stomachs. Sitting up gives babies a new vantage point, compared to being on their sides, and standing opens up a whole new world of possibilities. Each of these different positions encourages babies to use their muscles in different ways, and offers them new sensory experiences, opportunities and challenges. A variety of environments for babies to explore will also stimulate their desire to move and play. Remember that for infants, a small change in environment can offer lots of new experiences and information. Switch up the room in your house where you play with baby to give him or her new things to look at. Take a blanket outside and let your baby enjoy playing in the fresh air, too. INSPIRE EXPERIENCE-BUILDNG Moving infants through a variety of positions and environments throughout the day keeps boredom at bay, and also provides them with opportunities to gain the experiences they need to learn and master new skills. The more experience they have, the more confident they will become in their movement abilities. Just as adults learn to master skills by practicing, your baby will practice movements over and over to fine-tune his or her abilities and move on to new challenges. Every developmental position provides infants with opportunities to strengthen muscles, acquire different sensory information, and see their world in a new and different way. Without all of these experiences, the path for motor development can be bumpy because babies will have difficulty mastering new skills. So the lesson here is, when you play with your baby, don’t forget to move! Rebecca Quinones and Rachel Gandy are founders of Babies On The MOVE, a Cary-based organization committed to helping children excel in motor development with in-home pediatric physical therapy and communitybased infant movement classes for children of all abilities. Learn more at babiesonthemoverdu.com.

carolinaparent.com | JANUARY 2019

UNDERSTANDING KIDS behave differently in different environments? Do certain circumstances or events cause the child to become more reserved than usual? Is the child able to make friends and play with others in a group setting?

BEHAVIORAL CHALLENGES

Understanding Your Child’s Emotional and Behavioral Challenges BY LUCY DANIELS CENTER STAFF

here are diverse programs and services available for children and families dealing with developmental, emotional or behavioral extra needs. The areas of development that may benefit from more focused attention in early childhood include, but are not limited to, developmental delays or neuroatypicalities; fine or gross motor difficulties; speech and language delays or impairments; and emotional and behavioral challenges. This month, we will focus on this last category of development.

Image courtesy of LEV16/Shutterstock.com

SEPARATION One of the more common challenges of early childhood is a child’s resistance to a lengthy separation from his parents, such as attending school for the day. Many children take some time to become comfortable with this, especially in the preschool years. Usually, with time, these struggles work themselves out and children gradually become more comfortable with saying goodbye to parents

JANUARY 2019 | carolinaparent.com

and joining a group for a few hours each day at school. When a child doesn’t seem to be settling in, and when goodbyes are not mutual (e.g., parents need to sneak out or have to leave a crying child), he or she may be in need of some extra attention in this area.

SHYNESS AND INHIBITION Some children tend to be more inhibited, reserved or shy, while others are more easily outgoing and social. These differences are often simply a part of our various personality types. When is shyness rooted in something other than personality type? For some children, shyness or inhibition does not stem from a place of comfort rooted in their personality, but is rather tied to an uncomfortable feeling in certain situations that causes them to freeze, close up or turn inward. The signs of inhibition needing some form of intervention can be difficult to spot. Some questions parents or teachers can think about include: Does the child seem to

Behavior is perhaps one of the more difficult areas of development to measure. For all children, resisting or pushing back on limits, fighting with siblings and simply being “difficult” at times are a typical part of growing up and learning about the world. It can be hard for parents to know when behavioral challenges cross the line between expectable and problematic. As a general rule, behaviors are problematic when they consistently interfere with a family’s day-to-day routine. A tantrum once in a blue moon is not likely a cause for concern. Regular tantrums, outbursts or stubbornness that lead to a parent or teacher having to consistently react in an extra careful or hardworking way may indicate that there is an underlying problem that may require specialized attention.

RIGIDITIES AND INFLEXIBILITY Similar to behavioral challenges, rituals or rigidity that get in the way of everyday events may be related to an underlying emotional difficulty. While some children can be particular about certain things, such as wanting to stick to a bedtime routine, those who seem to lose their ability to function when things are not just right may be in need of additional help. For questions or concerns in these or other areas of your child’s social and emotional development, visit lucydanielscenter.org, where you can search archived articles on these subjects. The Lucy Daniels Center is a nonprofit agency in Cary that promotes the emotional health and well-being of children and families. Visit lucydanielscenter.org to learn more.

FATHER FIGURING

If I Could Do It Again BY BRUCE HAM

Image courtesy of Merkushev Vasiliy/Shutterstock.com

y wife and I talked about the future, but only the good stuff: Where we wanted to retire, what life would be like without packing lunches and being in carpools, the idea of maybe purchasing a lake house someday. Never could we imagine that one of us would die unexpectedly at age 39. When my wife was diagnosed with stage IV colorectal cancer, our three daughters were 6, 9 and 12. She worked full-time and was the CEO of our house. The economics of our family called for my career to come first. I was also in charge of family fun. When I got home I tickled, wrestled, snuggled and read while Lisa did everything else. It’s hard to talk about the “what ifs.” It’s harder when the possibility of death is staring you in the face. The five-and-a-half months Lisa fought for her life left little time to plan. She was weak and exhausted

from treatments. I was overwhelmed — the hole in my heart widening as I secretly envisioned the inevitable. Thankfully, we had life insurance. I’ve heard that many couples don’t. We had four times more on me and for $400/year we could have had the same amount on her. Shortsighted on our part. The day before she died, she shared her passwords with me. I’d now be able to access our family photos on Shutterfly and check the kids’ grades on the school’s website. That same day she told me to remarry, “You’re not good alone.” At the time I couldn’t imagine ever loving again. Today, I’m engaged. What a gift that short conversation became! I read her a letter I’d written to her in anticipation of the end. I put some thought into it, but I should have said so much more. I wish we’d had more time. I wish we’d talked about the long-term vision for our

girls, our extended families, finances, memorial services and the potential gaps that would be left if one of us were gone. If I could do it again, I would have talked when she was well, and I wasn’t in such a fragile mental state. I’d have been more thoughtful about learning her role in our house. I would have purchased more life insurance to ensure long-term financial stability for my daughters. Oh, and I would have done a better job of letting her know how important she was to me. I won’t make those mistakes the next time around. Bruce Ham, who lives in Raleigh, started writing after losing his wife and raising his three daughters on his own eight years ago. He has written a book, “Laughter, Tears and Braids,” about their journey, and writes a blog about his family’s experience at therealfullhouse.wordpress.com.

carolinaparent.com | JANUARY 2019

TECH TALK

Be Where Your Feet Are Consider adopting this New Year’s family tech mantra BY LAURA TIERNEY, THE SOCIAL INSTITUTE

a balance and control their technology use, rather than allow technology to control them. Parents can do this, too, by following three simple steps: 1. CONSIDER TECH LIMITS FOR YOURSELF (NOT JUST YOUR KIDS). If you have a family-monitoring device like Circle, consider setting time limits on yourself. (One mom I know has restricted herself to 30 minutes a day on Facebook in order to be more productive). If you’re an Apple user, install the latest update (iOS 12.1 at the time this article went to press) to see what you’re spending the most time on while using your phone, including how many times you pick it up. (To view this, go to Settings > Screen Time.) 2. MUTE NOTIFICATIONS. If you find yourself racing for your phone each time you hear a ding, ring or ping, consider setting limits on notifications. On the iPhone, go to Settings > Notifications and scroll down to see the apps that allow for notifications to be edited. For text messaging, hide alerts by going to a texting conversation, clicking the

contact icon at the top of the conversation, then click on “Info” and “Hide Alerts.” If you have an Android phone, go to Settings > Sound and Notification > App Notifications and tap the app(s) for which you want to stop receiving notifications. 3. TURN ON “DO NOT DISTURB WHILE DRIVING.” Lead by example and break the habit of checking your phone while driving. Go to Settings > Do Not Disturb > Activate “Do Not Disturb While Driving” and choose the “Automatically” setting. Many students are familiar with this feature, so if you are having trouble setting it up, encourage your child to coach you. Android users can download the free Driving Detective app, which is based on the same software Google developed for the Pixel 2. The motto of “Be Where Your Feet Are” allows us to get back some time in our day, break free of our technology tether and, most importantly, connect with our kids. We think that’s an excellent way to kick off a new year. Laura Tierney, a digital native who got her first phone at age 13, is founder and president of The Social Institute, which offers students positive ways to handle one of the biggest drivers of their social development: social media. She also recently became a mom. Learn more at thesocialinstitute.com.

JANUARY 2019 | carolinaparent.com

Images courtesy of Ira Yapanda/Shutterstock.com

n many ways, technology has made parenting easier. We can access medical records and make appointments with the click of a button. We can save precious hours by utilizing mobile banking and online grocery shopping. We can access real-time grades and connect with our kids’ teachers in a moment’s notice. Yet, most of us are also guilty of losing track of precious time by falling down a Facebook rabbit hole or mindlessly scrolling through Instagram, news sites or Pinterest feeds. And our kids notice. Whether our children are teens or toddlers, our everyday tech habits set an example for our kids and how they will use technology — both now and in the future. The new year is a perfect time to kick bad tech habits to the curb and hit the reset button with a new and simple motto: “Be Where Your Feet Are.” This simply means being present in each moment. If you’re driving, drive. Resist the urge to also talk on the phone. If you’re cooking dinner, focus on that. No need for your phone to be part of the mix. As the founder of The Social Institute, I coach students all around the country to strike

COLLEGE TRANSITIONS

Advice for high school students thinking about a career in medicine BY DAVE BERGMAN, ED.D.

ver the past decade, our team at College Transitions has helped guide hundreds of aspiring physicians toward undergraduate colleges and universities that will serve as ideal springboards into medical school. If you have an aspiring medical student, how — and in some cases where — your student spends his or her undergraduate years will play a significant role in whether he or she is ultimately able to earn a spot in a school of medicine. In our experience, there are a handful of questions students must ask. Here are those questions and our answers. DO I NEED TO ATTEND A PRESTIGIOUS UNDERGRADUATE SCHOOL? No, you do not have to attend an elite institution to be admitted to medical school. The undergraduate school you attend will only help you to the extent that it enables you to achieve a high GPA and successfully prepare you for the Medical College Admission Test. According to the Association of American Medical Colleges, the average MCAT score for admitted applicants at Johns Hopkins University in Baltimore was in the 99th percentile. Some of those individuals attended Ivy League institutions, while others graduated from state schools. The highly respected Albert Einstein College of Medicine, located in the Bronx section of New York, accepted students from schools such as Bloomsburg University in Bloomsburg, Pennsylvania, and Bowling Green State University in Bowling Green, Ohio, into their class of 2022. In certain cases, such as at Duke University, the affiliated medical school does give preference to its undergrads, in part because

they have an intimate familiarity with the rigor of the program. Selecting a school with ample research opportunities for undergraduates can also be advantageous. SHOULD I BE A PRE-MED MAJOR? This may come as a surprise, but the average MCAT score of students who majored in the biological sciences is nearly identical to the scores of students who majored in math, humanities or social sciences. In fact, in 2018, humanities majors possessed slightly higher average MCAT scores than those who studied biology. Translation: You are genuinely free to pursue any academic major you want on the road to medical school. That being said, most medical schools require two to four semesters of biology, two semesters of both organic and inorganic chemistry, two semesters of physics, and two semesters of math (including calculus). If you can balance the courses required for a non-pre-med major in addition to these demanding courses, go for it. If you start accidentally labeling hydrolytic enzymes in French on your biology final, it may be time to consider a more focused course of study. SHOULD I CONSIDER A B.A./M.D. OR B.S./M.D. PROGRAM? If you are 100 percent committed to becoming a medical doctor, you might want to consider applying to a joint bachelor of arts/medical degree or bachelor of sciences/ medical degree program. George Washington University in Washington, D.C., admitted students who took three years of required courses, including pre-med prerequisites, before beginning their medical studies in year

four of the program. As long as a student maintains a 3.5 GPA through the first few years of study, has grades in science courses at or above a C, and is recommended by a special committee, the student’s streamlined, MCAT-free admission to medical school is a go. For more information, go to collegetransitions.com/ba-md-or-bs-mdprograms. PLAN FOR THE FINANCIAL BURDEN A sizable 86 percent of medical students emerge from school with debt to their name. As of 2018, the median debt load is a whopping $190,000, with one quarter of graduates carrying debts in excess of $200,000, according to a Washington Post report published Jan. 21, 2018. The good news is that, unlike with law school, just about everyone who makes it through medical school will end up with a six-figure career. However, doctors’ salaries vary greatly by specialty area. While primary care physicians bring home an average of $207,000, according to the 2018 Medscape Physician Compensation Report, cardiologists and orthopedic surgeons make more than twice that amount, earning an average of $410,000 and $440,000 respectively. It’s important to remember that becoming a medical doctor can involve up to 14 years of higher education, meaning that you will be missing out on as many as 10 postundergrad, income-generating years. While this represents a pretty significant opportunity cost, those students who have a burning desire to join the medical field will find the rewards well worth the sacrifice. Dave Bergman, Ed.D., is a co-founder of College Transitions, a team of college planning experts committed to guiding families through the college admissions process. He is also co-author of “The Enlightened College Applicant: A New Approach to the Search and Admissions Process.” Learn more at collegetransitions.com.

carolinaparent.com | JANUARY 2019

Images courtesy of Ildogesto/Shutterstock.com

So Your Kid Wants to Be a Doctor?

EXCURSION

Savannah Tours Bringing history to life BY MARILYN JONES

our kids might not know who General James Oglethorpe and Forrest Gump are, but they’re sure to recognize a pirate — and they’ll get to meet one from The Pirates’ House restaurant in Savannah aboard an OLD SAVANNAH TOURS trolley during the company’s Historic On/Off Tour. The Pirates’ House, serving meals and beverages to seafarers since 1753 — including pirates —is one of Old Savannah Tours’ hop-on-and-off stops. Characters from pop culture and Savannah’s storied past visit passengers at several locations along the tour route, including The Pirates’ House, where passengers hear about tales of scoundrels who came ashore and dined in this very establishment. Established in 1733, Savannah became Georgia’s first city and was laid out in a series of grids featuring public squares. Fortunately, 22 of the original 24 public squares still remain. Blessed with rich soil and a favorable climate, Savannah’s bordering lands became home to cotton and rice fields during a time when plantations and slavery resulted in a profitable enterprise. Savannah also served as a strategic port city during the American Revolution and Civil War. The city was spared from destruction by Union forces during the Civil War because of its beauty. Union General William Sherman even decided to present the city to President Abraham Lincoln as a Christmas gift in 1864. Old Savannah Tours leaves from 215 West Boundary Street and are offered year-round except on St. Patrick’s Day, Thanksgiving and Christmas. When purchased online, tickets for the Historic On/Off Tours cost $28 for ages 13 and older and $12 for ages 12 and younger. Ages 5 and younger are free. Old Savannah Tours also offer additional tours: Historic Overview,

JANUARY 2019 | carolinaparent.com

Grave Encounters, Savannah Experience, Land and Sea, Discover Savannah Girl Scout and private tours. Learn more at oldsavannahtours.com. Past becomes present and is fun, interesting and educational when experienced on one of the many tours offered in the city. Here are a few more family-friendly tours you can check out while visiting Savannah. Don’t forget to tip your guide 15-20 percent upon completion of the tour. OLD TOWN TROLLEY TOURS: This hop-on-and-off tour offers GPS tracking so you’ll know exactly when the trolley will arrive at each stop. Tour guides combine interesting facts with humor and make 15 stops throughout the historic district,

including Forsyth Park, museums and historic homes open for public view. Tours are offered year-round and, when purchased online, cost $29.70 for ages 14 and older and $14.40 for ages 4-12 and younger. Ages 3 and younger are free. Learn more at trolleytours.com/savannah#home. PLANTATION CARRIAGE COMPANY: For an even more authentic experience, hire a horse-drawn carriage. Knowledgeable guides take passengers for carriage rides along 25-30 blocks throughout the city for 50-60 minutes. Tours are offered yearround and depart from Ellis Square at the corner of Barnard and West Congress Streets every 20 minutes. For the company’s Historic Tour, tickets cost $25 for ages 12 and older and $12 for ages 5-11. Ages 4 and younger are free. Learn more at plantationcarriagecompany.com. HISTORIC SAVANNAH CARRIAGE TOURS: History and ghost tours are offered year-round and depart from the carriage stand near the Hyatt Regency Hotel on Bay Street. Tickets cost $25 for ages 12 and older and $12 for ages 5-11. Ages 4 and younger are free if the child is held on an adult’s lap (one child per adult). Learn more at savannahcarriage.com. SAVANNAH RIVERBOAT CRUISES: Float along the Savannah River during Savannah Riverboat Cruises’ Narrated Harbor

Sightseeing Cruise — a great way to learn about the Savannah River and what it historically means to the city. This hour-and-a-half cruise is accompanied by the captain’s narrative description of the port. Views along the way include Old Fort Jackson, the historic riverfront and the city skyline. Cruises are offered year-round. Tickets cost $24.95 for adults and $15.95 for ages 5-12. Ages 4 and younger are free. Learn more at savannahriverboat.com. Discover more to do during your visit at visitsavannah.com. Marilyn Jones is a freelance writer specializing in travel. Her articles routinely appear in magazines and major newspapers throughout Canada and the U.S. PICTURED ABOVE: Centuries-old homes line the streets of Savannah. Photo courtesy of Marilyn Jones PICTURED ON THE LEFT: Carriage companies offer tours throughout the historic district. Photo courtesy of VisitSavannah.com Forsyth Park is a stop on every trolley tour. Photo courtesy of VisitSavannah.com “Forrest Gump” is one of Old Savannah Tours’ step-on trolley guides. Photo courtesy of Marilyn Jones carolinaparent.com | JANUARY 2019

CALENDAR JANUARY 2019

OUR PICKS BY JANICE LEWINE

Shen Yun | Jan. 4-6 Take a magical journey through 5,000 years of Chinese culture as Shen Yun presents an all-new show at Raleigh Memorial Auditorium. Classical dance performances, powerful orchestral Photo courtesy of Book Harvest’s Dream Big Book Drive

works, traditional costuming and 3D projection highlight China’s magnificent dynasties, regions and ethnic groups in an uplifting production for all ages. Shows take place at 7:30 p.m., Jan. 4; 2 and 7:30 p.m., Jan. 5; and 2 p.m., Jan. 6. Purchase tickets, $76-$141, at shenyun.com/raleigh.

MLK Jr. Events | Throughout January Honor the life and legacy of Martin Luther King Jr. at several events in the Triangle this month. Durham Parks and Recreation hosts “Celebrating the Legacy Through the Arts” Jan. 12, 2-5 p.m., which features visual art displays, performances, poetry, crafts and more at the W.D. Hill Recreation Center. Book Harvest’s Big Dream Book Drive takes place Jan. 21, 1-4 p.m., at Durham Central Park, and honors King’s vision that all children have the chance to Photos courtesy of Shen Yun

realize their full potential through literacy. Family activities, live music and food trucks round out the fun. Also, don’t miss author Willa Brigham as she shares inspirational stories with kids ages 4-10 about key leaders in the Civil Rights movement Jan. 19, 10-11:30 a.m., at the Cary Arts Center. Admission is free for all events.

Chinese New Year Festival | Jan. 26 Celebrate the Year of the Pig at the Chinese New Year Festival at Raleigh’s Dorton Arena, 10 a.m.-5 p.m., hosted by the Triangle Area Chinese American Society. Kung Fu performances, traditional music, cultural Photo courtesy of Tacas members

exhibits, authentic Chinese cuisine and family-friendly activities highlight this annual event. Purchase advance tickets, $5/person, at nctacas.org. Tickets are $8/person at the door. Admission is free for ages 5 and younger.

JANUARY 2019 | carolinaparent.com

CALENDAR JANUARY 2019

PERFORMANCES BY JANICE LEWINE

SHEN YUN

TRANSACTORS IMPROV

“JUMP”

JAN. 4-6 – Raleigh Memorial Auditorium, 2 E. South St., Raleigh. See the website for show times and to purchase tickets. $76-$141/person. Take a magical journey through 5,000 years of Chinese culture as Shen Yun entertains all ages with classical dance, orchestral music, storytelling and more. shenyun.com/raleigh.

JAN. 12 – The ArtsCenter, 300-G E. Main St, Carrboro. 6-7 p.m. $10/person. The ensemble performs family-friendly improv scenes based on audience suggestions. Purchase tickets online. artscenterlive.com.

JAN. 23-FEB. 10 – PlayMakers Repertory Company, Joan H Gillings Center for Dramatic Art, 120 Country Club Rd., Chapel Hill. See the website for show times and to purchase tickets. The world premiere by emerging playwright Charly Evon Simpson takes audiences on a theatrical journey to a place where lights flicker, things fall from the sky, and a sister finds solace on a bridge. Ages 14 and older. playmakersrep.org/show/jump.

“ Fiddler on the Roof,” one of Broadway’s most popular musicals, is being performed Jan. 8-13 at the Durham Performing Arts Center.

“THE NEXT GENERATION LEAHY” JAN. 26 – Cary Arts Center, 101 Dry Ave., Cary. 7:30 p.m. $23-$27/person. Building on more than three generations of musicianship, Doug and Jennifer Leahy and their six children keep the Leahy tradition alive through Celtic-based music, song and dance. Purchase tickets online. etix.com.

“FIDDLER ON THE ROOF” JAN. 8-13 – Durham Performing Arts Center, 123 Vivian St., Durham. See the website for show times and to purchase tickets. $76 and up. A talented cast and lavish orchestra tell this heartwarming story of fathers and daughters, husbands and wives, and the timeless traditions that define faith and family. ticketmaster.com.

“THE MUSIC OF BILLY JOEL” JAN. 18-19 – Meymandi Concert Hall, 2 E. South St., Raleigh. 8 p.m. $18-$65. Hand-picked by the “piano man” himself for the starring role in the Broadway musical “Movin’ Out,” Grammy- and Tony-nominated Michael Cavanaugh performs Billy Joel’s biggest hits with the North Carolina Symphony, including “She’s Got a Way,” “New York State of Mind,” “Uptown Girl” and “Only the Good Die Young.” Purchase tickets online. ticketmaster.com.

Photos courtesy of Joan Marcus

“LUNA’S MAGIC FLUTE” JAN. 27 – The ArtsCenter, 300-G E. Main St, Carrboro. 3 and 4:30 p.m. $8/person. Take a magical and musical journey with Luna as she encounters galloping horses, a swimming turtle and a soaring hummingbird. Together, Luna and her new friends overcome challenges and learn the true power of friendship. Purchase tickets online. artscenterlive.com.

carolinaparent.com | JANUARY 2019

CALENDAR JANUARY 2019

DAILY 1 TUESDAY

5 SATURDAY

dam to discover its geologic foundation.

9 WEDNESDAY

AADE Kwanzaa Fest. Durham Armory,

Birding with Vernon. Lake Crabtree County

Drop-off program. Ages 7-14. Registration

Eagle Count. Lake Crabtree County Park,

212 Foster St., Durham. Noon-5:30 p.m.

Park, 1400 Aviation Pkwy., Morrisville.

required. apm.activecommunities.com/

1400 Aviation Pkwy., Morrisville.

Free. Enjoy games, crafts, a drumming

8:30-10 a.m. Free. Join bird enthusiast

wakeparks/activity_search/field-school-

7-9 a.m. Free. Join park staff in collecting

class, fire engines and more. Doors

Vernon for an easy walk while looking and

rock-hounds-park-tour/3584.

data for the state and national count of

open at noon. The Children’s Village

listening for feathered friends. Discover

Parent/Child Clay Workshop:

bald eagles. No prior birding experience

opens at 12:30 p.m. and performances

different types of birds and their habitats.

Make a Bowl. Durham Arts Council

required. Enjoy a light breakfast after the

take place at 2 p.m. Take a food pantry

All ages. Registration not required.

Clay Studio, 1058 W. Club Blvd., Durham.

count. Registration required.

donation for Urban Ministries of

wakegov.com/parks/lakecrabtree.

10-11:30 a.m., 4-5:30 p.m. $15/child.

wakegov.com/parks/lakecrabtree.

Durham. aadekwanzaafest.wixsite.com/ kwanzaafest. First Walk. White Oak Creek Greenway,

Discovery Table: Tracks and Signs.

Use various hand-building techniques

Crowder County Park, 4709 Ten-Ten

to create a functional bowl before and

Nature Watchers: Duck Tales. Crowder County Park, 4709 Ten-Ten Rd.,

Rd., Apex. 1-3 p.m. Free. Learn about

painting it with liquid-colored clay. Ages 2

Apex. 11 a.m.-noon. Free. Learn about

1216 Jenks Carpenter Rd., Cary. 10-11

animal tracks and signs at the discovery

and older with caregiver. Register online.

ducks and the places they call home.

a.m. Free. Start off 2019 with a healthy

table, located by the upper playground.

durhamarts.org.

Practice duck calls, make a craft and

walk on the White Oak Creek Greenway

Registration not required.

with members of the Town of Cary Greenways Committee and the Cary Teen

wakegov.com/parks/crowder. Three Kings Day Parade. Town Hall

take a nature hike. Ages 3-5 with adult.

8 TUESDAY

Meet at the upper pavilion. Registration

Artificial Intelligence: How Computers

required online. apm.activecommunities.

Council. All ages. Parking is available at

Campus, 316 N. Academy St., Cary.

Learn. Kramden Institute, 4915

com/wakeparks/activity_search/nature-

White Oak Park. Registration not required.

1-4 p.m. Free. Members of different

Prospectus Dr., Ste. J, Durham. 5-8 p.m.

watchers-duck-tales/3560.

townofcary.org.

Latino cultures lead a colorful and

Free. Learn about machine-learning

musical parade. townofcary.org.

techniques, including how artificial neural

10 THURSDAY

networks learn from data to answer real

“Our Body: The Universe Within.”

2 WEDNESDAY Discovery Table: New Year Celebrations Around the World. Historic Yates

6 SUNDAY “Our Body: The Universe Within.”

world questions. Ages 12-15. Register

See Jan. 6. 10 a.m.-7 p.m.

online. techgirlz.org/techshop/8301. Nature Families: Duck, Duck, Goose.

11 FRIDAY

Mill County Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler

Triangle Town Center, 5959 Triangle Town

Rd., Raleigh. 8:30 a.m.-5 p.m.; drop-in

Blvd., Raleigh. 10 a.m.-7 p.m. $15 for

Crowder County Park, 4709 Ten-Ten Rd.,

program. Free. Learn about new year

ages 5-14, $17/adult. Free for ages 4 and

Apex. 11 a.m.-noon. Free. Study the

traditions around the world and make

younger. Purchase tickets online or at

many parts of birds, including feathers,

a Chinese New Year’s lantern to take

the door. Discover the inner workings of

beaks and feet. Make a webbed track and

12 SATURDAY

home. All ages. Registration not required.

the human body by viewing anatomical

waddle down to the pond to see ducks

Tots on Trails: Winter Wildlife.

wakegov.com/parks/yatesmill.

displays, human specimens, reproductions

and geese in action. All ages with adult.

Stevens Nature Center/Hemlock Bluffs,

of historic anatomical artwork and more.

Meet at the upper pavilion. Registration

2616 Kildaire Farm Rd., Cary. 10-11 a.m.

ourbodyraleigh.com.

required online. apm.activecommunities.

$8/resident, $10/nonresident. Ages 1-5

com/wakeparks/activity_search/nature-

and caregiver delight in the discoveries

families-duck-duck-goose/3557.

of nature. Register online with course

3 THURSDAY Discovery Table: New Year Celebrations Around the World. See Jan. 2.

7 MONDAY Field School For Kids: Rock Hounds

Parent/Child Clay Workshop:

“Our Body: The Universe Within.” See Jan. 6. 10 a.m.-10 p.m.

#121596. classweb.townofcary.org.

4 FRIDAY

Park Tour. Historic Yates Mill County

Discovery Table: New Year Celebrations

Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler Rd., Raleigh.

2112 County Park Dr., New Hill. 9-11 a.m.

10:30 a.m.-noon. Free. Explore the

Free. Learn how to identify seasonal

rocks of Yates Mill, including those found

birds with birding expert Larry Zoller.

naturally, and others that were brought

Ages 6 and older; children must be able

there for mill work. Take a hike to the mill

to observe quietly. Meet at the platform

Around the World. See Jan. 2.

JANUARY 2019 | carolinaparent.com

Make a Bowl. See Jan 7. 4-5:30 p.m.

Winter Bird Hike. Harris Lake County Park,

CALENDAR JANUARY 2019

salutations. Register online with course

Hoo-Hoo, Who’s There? Harris Lake County

in the educational garden. Advance

noon. Free. Build a snowman for the

registration required online. wakegov.

wildlife based on the book, “A Stranger

#121438. classweb.townofcary.org.

Park, 2112 County Park Dr., New Hill. 2-3

com/parks/harrislake.

in the Woods,” by C. Sams and J. Stoick.

Wildlife in Winter. Wilkerson Nature

p.m. Free. Read “All About Owls” by Jim

Dress for outdoor fun. Ages 1-6 with

Preserve, 5229 Awls Haven Dr., Raleigh.

Arnosky. Learn facts about owls that live

13 SUNDAY

adult. Meet at the Cypress Shelter.

12:45-2:15 p.m. $3/child. Learn what wild

in central North Carolina and practice owl

12th Annual Run for Young 5K. Christ

Advance online registration required.

animals do in winter as they hibernate

calls. All ages. Meet at the Cypress Shelter.

wakegov.com/parks/harrislake.

and migrate to stay warm in the cold

Advance registration required online.

Episcopal Church, 120 E. Edenton St., Raleigh. 2-6 p.m. $25-$30/person. Take

woods. Ages 3-5 with adult. Register

wakegov.com/parks/harrislake.

part in a family-friendly 5K to raise

15 TUESDAY

online with course #231337. reclink.

awareness for teen safety behind the

Magical World of Herbs. Page-Walker

raleighnc.gov.

wheel. Register online. runforyoung.

Arts & History Center, 119 Ambassador

itsyourrace.com/register.

Loop, Cary. 6-7 p.m. $16/resident, $20/

17 THURSDAY

squirrel habitats and take a hike to learn

nonresident. Discover the magical world

“Our Body: The Universe Within.” See

how squirrels are different from birds.

Eco-Explorers: Winter Birds. Stevens

Nuts About Squirrels. American Tobacco Trail, 1309 New Hill-Olive Chapel Rd., Apex. 11 a.m.-noon. Free. Examine

Nature Center/Hemlock Bluffs, 2616

of healing herbs to make lip balms and

Kildaire Farm Rd., Cary. 2-4 p.m. $8/

healing salves. Ages 5-10. Register

Jan. 6. 10 a.m.-7 p.m.

resident, $10/nonresident. Children make

online with course #119559. classweb.

18 FRIDAY

Hill parking area. Advance registration

treasured memories while increasing

townofcary.org.

Astronomy Night. Wilkerson Nature

required online. wakegov.com/parks/att.

Nibble on sunflower seeds. All ages. Meet at the lower picnic table at the New

Preserve, 5229 Awls Haven Dr., Raleigh.

Recreational Adventures: A Poppin’

Ages 7-10. Register online with course

16 WEDNESDAY

5:30-7 p.m. $3/person. Ages 5 and older

Good Time! Historic Yates Mill County

#121612. classweb.townofcary.org.

Specialized Recreation: Sound and

their knowledge of plants and animals.

enjoy an indoor presentation, followed

Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler Rd., Raleigh. 2-3

Salutations. Cary Senior Center, 120

by time outdoors to view the moon, stars

p.m. Free. Learn about different varieties

14 MONDAY

Maury O’Dell Place, Cary. 6:30-7:30 p.m.

and more with the preserve’s telescope.

of corn, make a popcorn-themed craft

Kids Discover Nature: Friendly

$9/resident, $11/nonresident. Ages 11

and enjoy some fresh-popped popcorn.

Snowman. Harris Lake County Park,

and older with special needs practice yoga

reclink.raleighnc.gov.

All ages with adult. Register online. apm.

2112 County Park Dr., New Hill. 11 a.m.-

and explore the many ways to do sun

activecommunities.com/wakeparks/ Activity_Search/recreational-adventuresa-poppin-good-time/3582.

Explore “OUR BODY: The Universe Within” through March 31 at Triangle Town Center in Raleigh.

19 SATURDAY Junior Naturalist: Wildlife Detectives. Stevens Nature Center/Hemlock Bluffs, 2616 Kildaire Farm Rd., Cary. 1-2 p.m. $8/ resident, $10/nonresident. Participants develop their naturalist skills and

Photo courtesy of “OUR BODY: The Universe Within”

understanding of local nature. Ages 5-8 with parent. Register online with course #121673. classweb.townofcary.org. MLK Dreamfest: “Celebrating the Dream.” Cary Arts Center, 101 Dry Ave., Cary. 8 p.m. Free. Celebrate the life and legacy of Martin Luther King Jr. featuring the music of the Pleasant Grove Church Gospel Choir, harpist Winifred Garrett and the North Carolina Central University

carolinaparent.com | JANUARY 2019

CALENDAR JANUARY 2019

Vocal Jazz Ensemble. townofcary.org/

20 SUNDAY

recreation-enjoyment/events/holiday-

Kids EveryWEAR Consignment Sale.

MLK Dreamfest: Day of Service 2019.

Ages 7-12. Drop-off program. Meet at the

Good Hope Farm, 1580 Morrisville

park office. Advance registration required

Cary Towne Center, 1105 Walnut St,

Carpenter Rd., Cary. Free. Spend the

online. wakegov.com/parks/harrislake.

MLK Dreamfest: “Remembering the

Cary. 1-5 p.m. Free. Shop for gently

afternoon helping to maintain and

Leaders of the Dream.” Cary Arts

used children’s clothing, educational

beautify the area around Good Hope

County Park, 1400 Aviation Pkwy.,

Center, 101 Dry Ave., Cary. 10-11:30 a.m.

materials, infant equipment, nursery

Farm in honor of MLK Jr. Day of Service.

Morrisville. 1-3 p.m. Free. Spy on grey

Free. Author Willa Brigham shares

furniture, maternity wear and more.

All ages; ages 15 and younger must be

squirrels in the park and learn about

kidseverywear.com.

supervised by an adult. Register online

their habits, habitats, and the perils

for either the 10 a.m.-noon or 2-4 p.m.

they face. Registration required. wakegov.com/parks/lakecrabtree.

events/dreamfest.

stories about some of the key leaders of the Civil Rights movement. Ages 4-10.

MLK Dreamfest: Day of Service.

townofcary.org/recreation-enjoyment/

Stevens Nature Center/Hemlock Bluffs,

session. townofcary.org/recreation-

events/holiday-events/dreamfest.

2616 Kildaire Farm Rd., Cary. 2-4 p.m.

enjoyment/events/holiday-events/

Specialized Recreation: Pamper Party

Free. Spend the afternoon helping to

dreamfest. Natural Explorations: Stately

Squirrel Spotters. Lake Crabtree

22 TUESDAY Candy-Making Fun. Herbert C. Young

With Friends. Cary Senior Center,

maintain and beautify the nature center.

120 Maury O’Dell Place, Cary. 3-5 p.m.

Ages 16 and older. townofcary.org/

Squirrels. Historic Yates Mill County

Community Center, 101 Wilkinson

$11/resident, $15/nonresident. Ages

recreation-enjoyment/events/holiday-

Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler Rd., Raleigh.

Ave., Cary. 6-7 p.m. $18/resident,

11 and older with special needs enjoy

events/dreamfest.

2-3 p.m. Free. Learn about squirrels

$23/nonresident. Ages 11-17 create

and their adaptations through stories, a

old-fashioned taffy and hard candy

a manicure and pedicure, face painting and more. Register online with course

21 MONDAY

craft and nature hike. All ages with adult.

using ingredients such as caramel,

#121078. classweb.townofcary.org.

Dream Big Book Drive. Durham Central

apm.activecommunities.com/wakeparks/

marshmallow and chocolate. Register

Wildlife In Winter. See Jan. 16. 10:30

Park, 501 Foster St., Durham. 1-4 p.m.

activity_search/natural-explorations-

online with course #120978.

a.m-noon. Register online with course

Free. Donate new or gently used

stately-squirrels/3586.

classweb.townofcary.org.

#231338. reclink.raleighnc.gov.

children’s book, volunteer to help sort

Nature Lab: Winter Fun. Harris Lake

and box donations, and enjoy live

County Park, 2112 County Park Dr., New

23 WEDNESDAY

music, food trucks and family activities.

Hill.10 a.m.-noon. Free. Enjoy nature

Lil Cooks in the Kitchen: If You Give a

bookharvestnc.org.

exploration outdoors and crafts indoors.

Mouse a Brownie. Herbert C. Young

CALENDAR POLICY The Carolina Parent calendar lists local and regional activities for children and families. Visit carolinaparent.com/calendar to submit an event for consideration by the 6th of the month for the next month’s issue. Please call ahead to confirm dates and times. This calendar may include some events not intended for young children. Find more events at carolinaparent.com/calendar.

JANUARY 2019 | carolinaparent.com

CALENDAR JANUARY 2019

Community Center, 101 Wilkinson Ave.,

25 FRIDAY

5 and older. townofcary.org/recreation-

the woods to call for owls. Register online

Cary. 4-5:30 p.m. $23/resident, $30/

Crowder By Night: The Deep Sleep.

enjoyment/events/special-events/winter-

with course #231339. reclink.raleighnc.gov.

nonresident. Discover the joy of cooking

Crowder County Park, 4709 Ten-Ten Rd.,

with storybook characters. Ages 3-5

Apex. 4:30-5:30 p.m. Free. Learn about

with parent. Register online with course

animal survival strategies and make a fun

26 SATURDAY

#120080. classweb.townofcary.org.

craft to take home. All ages with adult.

Chinese New Year Festival. Dorton Arena,

Nature Nerds. Lake Crabtree County Park,

Meet at the upper pavilion. Registration

North Carolina State Fairgrounds, 1025 Blue

101 Wilkinson Ave., Cary. 3:45-5:15 p.m.

1400 Aviation Pkwy., Morrisville. Noon-

required online. apm.activecommunities.

Ridge Rd., Raleigh. 10 a.m.-5 p.m. $5-$8/

$19/resident, $24/nonresident. Ages

1 p.m. Free. Expand your knowledge

com/wakeparks/activity_search/crowder-

person. Enjoy performances, authentic

11 and older with disabilities learn to

by-night-the-deep-sleep/3567.

Chinese food and family-friendly activities.

make a hearty bowl of vegetable soup.

nctacas.org.

of local flora and fauna with park staff. Help collect data for the Natural Resource

Geology Detectives: Minerals.

wonderland-at-bond-park.

28 MONDAY Cooking is Fun: Vegetable Soup.

Tales and Trails: Bird Box Birding.

Herbert C. Young Community Center,

Inventory Database while increasing your

Wilkerson Nature Preserve, 5229 Awls

own identification skills. Ages 9 and older.

Haven Dr., Raleigh. 3-4:30 p.m. $5/person.

Stevens Nature Center/Hemlock Bluffs,

Registration required. wakegov.com/

Learn how geologists test minerals by

2616 Kildaire Farm Rd., Cary. 12:30-2 p.m.

Crowder County Park, 4709 Ten-Ten Rd.,

parks/lakecrabtree.

using properties like hardness, streak,

$8/resident, $10/nonresident. Learn about

Apex. 11 a.m.-noon. Free. Enjoy snow-

color, luster and acid reactivity. Ages 8-13.

local birds and build a nesting box for

themed fun. All ages with adult. Meet

backyard birds. All ages with adult.

at the Cardinal Shelter. Registration not

reclink.raleighnc.gov.

required. wakegov.com/parks/crowder.

24 THURSDAY Parent Workshop: Autism and Mental Health. Cary Senior Center, 120 Maury

Harry Potter Adventure. Bond Park

O’Dell Place, Cary. 6:30-8:30 p.m.

Community Center, 150 Metro Park

$11/resident, $15/nonresident. Parents

Dr., Cary. 6-7 p.m. $18/resident, $23/

classweb.townofcary.org. Kids Get Crafty: Splendid Snowflakes.

classweb.townofcary.org. Winter Wonderland at Bond Park. See Jan. 25. 9 a.m.-4:45 p.m. Your College Quest Guide. Herbert C.

29 TUESDAY DIY Spa Essentials. Herbert C. Young Community Center, 101 Wilkinson

learn meaningful coping strategies

nonresident. Explore Harry Potter’s

for themselves and their autistic child.

world with a magical craft, potions,

Young Community Center, 101 Wilkinson

Ave., Cary. 6-7 p.m. $18/resident, $23/

trivia, wands and more. Ages 7-11.

Ave., Cary. 1-3 p.m. $7/resident, $10/

nonresident. Create bath fizz, scrubs and

classweb.townofcary.org.

nonresident. Learn how to successfully

lip balm using everyday items in your

classweb.townofcary.org.

navigate the college search, selection and

home. Ages 5-10. Register online with

application process. Ages 12 and older

course 119989. classweb.townofcary.org.

Specialized Recreation: Trivia Night. Cary Senior Center, 120 Maury O’Dell

Park Tales: The Mitten. Historic Yates

Teen DIY Spa Essentials. Herbert

Place, Cary. 6:30-8:30 p.m. $2/resident,

Mill County Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler

with parent. Register online with course

$3/nonresident. Ages 11 and older with

Rd., Raleigh. 11 a.m.-noon. Free. Read

#119878. classweb.townofcary.org.

special needs learn fun facts about

“The Mitten,” a whimsical story by Jan

sports, music, movies and more.

Brett about a young boy, his white

27 SUNDAY

resident, $23/nonresident. Teens make

mittens and the woodland creatures he

Curiosity Club: Log Life. Stevens Nature

their own luxurious spa treatments and

classweb.townofcary.org.

encounters. Learn some knitting history

Center/Hemlock Bluffs, 2616 Kildaire

discuss ways to ease stress. Ages 11-17.

Tots on Trails: Winter Wildlife.

C. Young Community Center, 101 Wilkinson Ave., Cary. 7-8 p.m. $18/

and make your own paper snowflake

Farm Rd., Cary. 2-4 p.m. $8/resident,

Stevens Nature Center/Hemlock Bluffs,

mittens. All ages with adult. Register

$10/nonresident. Ages 5-8 embrace

classweb.townofcary.org.

2616 Kildaire Farm Rd., Cary. 10-11 a.m.

online. apm.activecommunities.com/

science and nature while developing

$8/resident, $10/nonresident. Ages 1-5

wakeparks/activity_search/park-tales-

skills and knowledge about the natural

30 WEDNESDAY

the-mitten/3519.

world. Register online with course

“Our Body: The Universe Within.”

and caregiver delight in the discoveries of nature. Register online with course #121605. classweb.townofcary.org.

Winter Wonderland at Bond Park. Bond Park, 801 High House Rd., Cary. 4-8:45

#121608. classweb.townofcary.org.

See Jan. 6. 10 a.m.-7 p.m.

Owl Pellets. Wilkerson Nature Preserve,

p.m. $19/person. Enjoy single-rider snow

5229 Awls Haven Dr., Raleigh. 3:30-5:30

31 THURSDAY

tubing at Bond Park. See the website for

p.m. $4/child. Learn how owls digest the

“Our Body: The Universe Within.”

45-minute sessions and to register. Ages

fur, feathers or bones of its prey. Hike in

See Jan. 6. 10 a.m.-7 p.m.

carolinaparent.com | JANUARY 2019

FACES & PLACES

Rowan (2) of Cary hangs out at Memorial Park during a visit to Blowing Rock, North Carolina.

Submit high-resolution photos of your kids having fun in the Triangle and beyond at carolinaparent.com/facesandplaces.

JANUARY 2019 | carolinaparent.com

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