Ibizan 783 eissue 14th May 15 by The Ibizan, the all new Ibiza Sun newspaper.

One Nation

Under The Blues Tories Take Third Term, SNP Take Scotland, Liberals Take Beating, UKIP Take Clacton, Miliband Takes a Break ...

The UK election has returned the Conservatives with a slender majority of 12 seats. With most polls predicting a hung parliament and discussions of parliamentary coalitions already underway, Thursday’s results left the Tories smiling like their Cheshire outposts, but with many analysts questioning the consequences of the ‘divided Britain’ left in its wake. The SNP all but wiped out Labour and Liberal opposition in Scotland, and UKIP supporters may be left feeling their far stronger percentage of the national vote should have resulted in greater representation than the one seat the held in Clacton. David Cameron was also quick to raise Britain’s national status as a member of the European Union. His acceptance speech on being returned in his own constituency reinforced the commitment to undertake a membership referendum during this parliament. Meanwhile Ed Miliband, the now resigned leader of the Labour party has decided to take a break away from it all, perhaps surprisingly choosing Cameron’s own holiday favourite, and he is currently holidaying in Ibiza. More on the UK elections on page2.

The Ibizan, Thursday 14th May 2015, Issue 783

www.theibizan.com

Page 2

UK Elections Election Aftermath: Red Ed gets burnt at home and abroad Plus Cameron and the SNP

Only those people living underneath the rock of Es Vedra aren´t aware that The Conservative Party managed to achieve a majority win in the recent British Election. In the aftermath, defeated Labour leader Ed Miliband decided to lick his wounds in one of David Cameron’s favourite holiday retreats, Ibiza. Staying in a villa over-looking Cala Jondal, Ed flew out from London City Airport and narrowly missed the arrival of dozens of SNP MPs heading to Westminster. He is reported to have been reading The Financial Times on the flight and was said to be looking tired and haggard. Nothing that a bit of Ibiza sun won’t cure! The SNP MPs that Ed almost crossed paths with in the airport made their way to Westminster as part of the fifty-six strong contingent of new SNP members of parliament. They were greeted by SNP leader Nicola Sturgeon who made of speech stating that Scotland’s voice will be represented as never before. Meanwhile, David Cameron has been addressing his new cabinet, insisting that they must focus on ‘bread and butter’ ways of improving people’s lives. He promised a down-to-earth Conservative agenda focussed on extending opportunity. The new government is expected to prioritise laws on work and childcare.

Election in Detail:

The Conservatives have won the 2015 general election, securing the 326 seats needed for a slender overall majority. In a night containing some major shock results, the pollsters predictions of a hung parliament were not to be realised and Tory leader David Cameron was confident enough to make what was in effect a winner’s acceptance speech when his own seat as MP for Witney was confirmed. Cameron talked of the intention to press ahead with a referendum on Britain's membership of the European Union, and the Conservative’s ongoing economic policy. "My aim remains simple - to govern on the basis of governing for everyone in our United Kingdom," he said. "I want to bring our country together, our United Kingdom together, not least by implementing as fast as we can the devolution that we rightly promised and came together with other parties to agree both for Wales and for Scotland. In short, I want my party, and I hope a government I would like to lead, to reclaim a mantle that we should never have lost - the mantle of One Nation, One United Kingdom.” The Labour party performed badly in most areas leading to Ed Milliband’s con-

firmation he would stand down as leader. "I am truly sorry that I did not succeed," he told party supporters. "I have done my best for five years." Labour were wiped out in their traditional Scottish heartlands by a jubilant SNP who took 50 of the 56 seats. SNP leader Nicola Sturgeon: "There has been an overwhelming vote for change in Scotland and our 56 MPs will carry that message to the heart of Westminster." Both the Liberal party and UKIP performed far worse than predicted and lead to both party leaders also tendering their resignation. Liberal Democrat leader Nick Clegg said "I always expected this election to be incredibly difficult. The results have been immeasurably more crushing than I could ever have feared." UKIP leader Nigel Farage called for "real, genuine, radical reform" of the voting system and said that on a personal level, he felt "like an enormous weight has been lifted from my shoulders" Farage’s comments came in the context of having a bigger share of the total vote than the SNP, but only 1 seat compared to their 56. Political commentators were quick to warn of the consequences of a divided Britain to follow, with the SNP’s strong support, the Tories intent to hold an EU membership referendum, and UKIPs level of support unrealised in representation, all featuring regularly. BBC correspondent Nick Robinson said “Not since the fall of Thatcher or the Blair landslide has there been a political moment quite like this one. Personal triumphs for David Cameron and Nicola Sturgeon will not just reshape British politics but could perhaps reshape the future of the United Kingdom itself.” The final turnout is expected to be 66%, marginally up on 2010. When all votes are counted the Conservatives are expected to get a 37% share, Labour 31%, UKIP 13%, the Lib Dems 8%, SNP 5%, the Green Party 4% & Plaid Cymru 1%. Below: One of the many articles to appear in UK press based on David Miliband coming to Ibiza to ‘rave it up’ on the party island. All rather weak and predictable really.

The Ibizan, Thursday 14th May 2015, Issue 783

www.theibizan.com

Page 3

News...

Alianza Mar Blava Denounces Spanish Government to European Commission The Mar Blava Alliance registered a complaint with the European Commission for violation of Community law by the Government of Spain. The Spanish Government has apparently ignored to undertake a strategic assessment of the effects of hydrocarbons in the environmental processing of oil exploration projects currently underway in the vicinity of the Balearic Islands. In its complaint, Mar Blava highlights the need for the European Commission to require the Spanish Government to submit the procedure of strategic environmental assessments and that they should assess the impact of any actions undertaken.

Drug Taking Disney Tshirts are no laughing matter. Minister vows to pursue legal action.

The Spanish government are cracking down on the sale of Tshirts portraying your favourite cartoon characters getting wasted. The minister of trade and industry, Vicent Roig, said he will try to find legal channels to remove the offending items from the Ibizan marketplace. Roig added that it is unacceptable that minors are being exposed to such messages that encourage the consumption of narcotic substances.

11,000 meters of pine forest lost to Cala Vedella fire.

The Guardia Civil is investigating what may have caused the recent fire in Cala Vedella on Tuesday afternoon. The fire raged briefly destroying 11,000 square meters of forest, mainly of pine and juniper, according to the Institut Balear de la Natura (IBANAT). The fire is under control but IBANAT agents, Environment and firefighters are still working in the area to prevent any resurgence. The emergency services were close to evacuating the houses near the fire, but luckily it was not necessary thanks to the quick action of water carrying aircraft.

Disney Spain has also been contacted to take action on the matter and have provided assurances that they have put the issue in the hands of their legal department.

Cala De Poo Cala de Bou residents were in outrage last Sunday afternoon after a pipe in the Punta Xinxó area was found to be pumping sewage directly into the sea. Several local residents shared the video to YouTube and it isn’t a pretty sight. This situation seems to be occurring frequently throughout the Cala de Bou region, with recent sewage outlet issues at Bella Beach near Playa Pinet amongst others. There are also concerns beyond the residents of the effect the affluent could have if it becomes known, or worse still contacted, by the large influx of tourists to the area, particularly as Cala de Bou tends to attract a high proportion of families.

Balcony fall in San Antonio A British woman aged 55 is said to be in a serious condition after falling from a second-floor hotel balcony on the Avenida Doctor Fleming in San Antonio. She has suffered injuries to her spinal column and is in Ibiza’s Can Misses hospital. The British Foreign Office website has warned against the common practice of ‘balconing’, whereby young European tourists, often from the UK and frequently under the influence, attempt to jump into the swimming pool from their hotel balconies or terrace to terrace. At least two British tourists have died in as many years and others have been left paralysed from the neck down.

Record drug haul in Ibiza Town A drugs bust was carried out last Friday by agents of the National Police at a home in Ibiza Town. Agents discovered a record amount of 60 marijuana plants, one kilogram of cannabis buds ready for consumption, 120 grams of cocaine, 250 grams of amphetamine, 14 grams of ecstasy and a half kilo of hashish. They also found 12,500 euros in cash, two precision scales and means for preparing the drugs for sale. Local Police originally reported the suspect to the National Police after he behaved suspiciously at a previous incident. Officers asked the man to ´come down to the station´ before realising that he was barefoot. When an offer to escort the man to his house to retrieve footwear was turned down, officers became suspicious that he had something to hide.

www.theibizan.com

The Ibizan, Thursday 14th May 2015, Issue 783

Page 4

Restaurant Le 27

Richard Lawson e 27’ occupies one of the prime positions on the renowned ‘Restaurant Street’ of Santa Eulalia. It is to be found next door to the Chiang Mai Thai restaurant, which occupies the old premises of Sandy’s Bar that became famous for entertaining world famous celebrities back in the 1960s. Like its neighbour, Le 27 boasts a front terrace that overlooks the Plaza de España in front of the Town Hall, where most of the town’s celebrations are held. It has one of the largest terraces on the street, so you won’t be rubbing shoulders with your fellow diners whilst you eat. Indeed, any time now, once the remaining evening chill in the air has dispersed, their large upstairs terrace will also open to create one of the most romantic eating environments that the town can offer. This will also take their total capacity to over seventy at any one time. This being the heart of the town, it is also the logical starting point for anyone exploring the delights of the Restaurant Street and Le 27 is the second restaurant that visitors encounter as they set out. The new owners, Dominique and Victor, took over late last year when the previous incumbent, Jacques, finally retired at the age of 71. They have retained the existing staff, including Benjamin, the French chef from Perpignan who has run the kitchen for the last three years. This must have been an easy decision, both for reasons of continuity in terms of maintaining the goodwill earned with the restaurant’s many regular diners from around the island, but also because the quality of the food emanating from Benjamin’s kitchen can only be described as up-market in comparison to the other options on the street. However, it remains inexpensive when compared to establishments of similar quality elsewhere on the island.

‘L

Dominique and Victor, both 35, are understandably glowing with excitement and enthusiasm for their new project, but it nearly didn’t happen. Dominique had for years been living contentedly in Madrid and only met Victor at a party on one of her visits to see her parents. She nearly didn’t bother to go the party after a long day working, but once there she met ‘her perfect man’, who happened to be on holiday on the island. That was six years ago, during which time their son was born in 2013. Dominique herself was brought up on the island by her restaurateur parents, Henry and Suzie, in another restaurant on the Restaurant Street – Chez Henry. She is so happy to see so many of her parents´clients and their families. It’s just like the old days of her childhood. Meanwhile, Victor comes from a financial and hotelier background and was used to the hustle and bustle of living in the city. He couldn’t countenance the prospect of working flat out for six months to then spend six months kicking his heels throughout the Ibiza winter. Fortunately events conspired to solve these problems… Grandparents Suzie and Henry live just a few metres down the road and are over the moon at the prospect of being able to see so much of their grandson, albeit as babysitters when mum and dad are working. Meanwhile Jacques timed his retirement perfectly to coincide with their planned change of life-style and, the really good news, they’ve decided to stay open all year round, so that Victor won’t suffer from boredom in the winter! A lovely story, but time to cut to the chase and the real reason for our visit – the exquisite food… I spent much of my childhood crammed into the back of a sports car with my brother, sister, tent and luggage as my parents explored Europe. The best bits were when we stopped, escaped from the tiny car and sampled the local fare – especially in France. So to be invited to the 27 was a real treat, and my guest and I were not to be disappointed.

‘N

ot wishing to appear avaricious, and because my co-conspirator doesn’t eat them, I merely indicated a passing interest in the oysters, while choosing snails as my starter. Suzy, my companion, opted for the Parmesan Aubergine and looked somewhat concerned when the waitress presented us with a plate of oysters to precede the starters we had ordered, but it wasn’t a mistake. It was a magnifi-

cent gift. I could hardly contain myself – we’re talking about French Oysters, delivered fresh every Friday and kept under pressure, to emulate the water pressure on the seabed from which they were plucked. The Fines de Claires oysters come from the French Atlantic coast and have a lighter and more delicate taste. The restaurant aims to order enough to last the week, and will continue to do so throughout the year, but personally I wouldn’t wait till a Thursday just in case they do run out? Incidentally these were fantastic accompanied by the Pouilly-

Fumé white wine recommended by Dominique... The snails and Parmesan Aubergine were also quite unusual in that they had been cooked in the restaurant’s wood oven, which imparts a more interesting flavour variation to all of the dishes that they prepare using this method. For our main courses we both opted for fish. Suzy, the salmon kebab with tartare sauce while I took the ‘daily special’ option of hake. Both were superb. However, this restaurant prides itself on its homemade desserts and, although we were both royally stuffed by then, we took up the challenge and didn’t regret it. Even now I can’t believe that I found room for the lemon meringue pie. Other house specialities, that’ll have to wait for our subsequent visits, include the homemade Foie Gras Maison and Steak Tartare, the Rabbit in mustard sauce and the Moules Provençale (cooked in the wood oven au gratin). All in all there are some forty dishes from which to choose. They also serve Moules Marinières once a month as their Plate of the Day at lunchtime for €10,50 in the winter and spring months, which can’t be wrong, but then again the option of food of this quality as a Menu del Dia for just €14,50 makes a mockery of the concept of a cheap worker’s lunch… e 27’ opens from the 1st of October until mid- May lunch and dinner from Tuesday to Saturday inclusive and from mid-May until end of September evenings only Monday to Saturday inclusive. Closed on Sunday in the summer.

‘L

The Ibizan, Thursday 14th May 2015, Issue 783

www.theibizan.com

Page 5

Food & Drink

The Ibizan, Thursday 14th May 2015, Issue 783

News Tourists flying

are

Winter travel by air has this year increased by 10% according to figures at Ibiza Airport, but

Quilt Tribute The Association of Ibiza & Formentera Against Cancer, dedicated to supporting individuals with cancer and their families is creating a Patchwork Quilt Wall Hanging in 2015 as a tribute to all Cancer Patients, their Families and Friends and in memory of loved ones who are no longer with us. The completed work will be displayed in public places, i.e. Can Misses Hospital. The Patchwork Quilt Wall Hanging will depict an Ibiza Town scene, created by Island Artist Gerry Clarke, and measuring approximately 200 cm x 160 cm. Made up of 88 interconnecting patchwork squares, Gerry has created each individual square in an easy to follow pattern, and guided by Quilt Co-ordinator Barbara Gregory, will come together to create the overall picture. If you are interesting in taking part in the creation of the Patchwork Quilt, please contact the Quilt Co-ordinator Barbara Gregory Phone: 971 196 211 or Email: bagregory23@aol.com for further details. Happy Stitching

www.theibizan.com

Page 6

figures for summer are also set to rise by up to 4% with the introduction of 16 new connections. Last year there were a total of 6.2 million passengers at the airport in Ibiza, which smashed all previous records.

The day of the nurses The Primary School of Nursing held an activity day to highlight the work performed by the most under-rated members of the health community. The nurses conducted various workshops (on cardiovascular resuscitation, dressing and general health) in a tent set-up in Vara de Rey "to promote the nurse as the person directly responsible for patient care, "explained Noelia Azqueta, the deputy director of nursing at Can Misses. In addition, the group celebrated International Nurses Day in the old hospital Can Misses with a series of presentations which highlighted the work that nurses have made in the past year. Ina Cardona, the Area Supervisor for Training and Projects, said that the main challenges ahead for the group of nurses is "quality care" and "enhancing" their work in areas such as patient safety. "We are not only nurses at the bedside, which is very important, but also in many other sectors," said Cardona, who also adds that the role of nurses today "is much more comprehensive than a few decades agoâ&#x20AC;?.

Marine Extraction A group of experts and volunteers extracted two 100m long fishing nets from the areas of Bledes and sa Conillera, according to reports from the Government. Conservation experts from the Governing Board of the Reserves, a fishing inspection team from the Consell of Ibiza, a professional diver, an underwater photographer and the brotherhood of fishermen of Sant Antoni were all involved in the extraction. According to the Government, the extraction was done very carefully, minimizing the impact on the marine environment and removing the specimens of fish and starfish that were caught in them. The location of these networks had previously been reported by users of the protected marine area: diving, spearfishing and professional fishermen. Nets and other fishing

gear, accidentally abandoned on the seabed are made of highly resistant materials and once sunken act as a death trap for many marine species that are caught up within. Over the coming months it is expected that marine conservation will be carried out periodically in order to maintain the best possible state of this valuable nature reserve. This area of protected marine reserves has excellent quality thanks to a variety of environments (sandy bottom, seagrass meadows, caves, coralline and rocky bottoms), a leading rich fauna and points of special interest.

SCORCHIO!

Yellow Alert The State Meteorological Agency (AEMET) has activated a yellow alert for high temperatures in Ibiza and Formentera for this Thursday. Thermometers will rise to 34 degrees between midday and 6pm, according to forecasts by Aemet. The yellow alert continues on Friday, this time for strong winds and coastal phenomena. The winds are expected to gust to 80km per hour during the early hours of the morning.

Guarding the civilians Students are shown the real Guardia Civil

Some 650 students between the ages of 10 and 12 have enjoyed two days of a Guardia Civil exhibition, held for the first time in Ibiza. The initiative aims to show the children that the Guardia Civil exists to help citizens and not to fear the green uniforms. "For years policemen give talks in schools addressing the problems of the students, mainly the dangers of the Internet and drug use. When they hear the words Guardia Civil, they become afraid" said the director of CEIP Sant Jordi. "With these meetings they realize that the Guardia Civil should not cause fear, but is there to help." For two days, in Santa EulĂ ria and Sant Jordi, students in the fifth and sixth grades have had fun sounding the sirens, screaming into megaphones, playing with the dogs of the Canine Unit and using the Diving equipment of the GEAS underwater team. Agents from the traffic, borders, drug control, public safety teams and the Service for the Protection of Nature (SEPRONA) were also present. Organisers are keen to reach all the municipalities of the islands with the initiative, continuing after the summer in Sant Antoni and Formentara.

The Ibizan, Thursday 14th May 2015, Issue 783

www.theibizan.com

Meet ‘the real Mr Nice’

can get up close and personal to this incredible man and hear his sensational life story on Thursday 28th May. Featuring never-seen-before footage from Howard's 1970s home movies and secretly filmed clips of his adventures, “The Real And raise funds for a brand new Mr Nice” lays bare the truth about one of documentary featuring rare archive the world’s most famous counterculture footage and remarkable insights into heroes. For the very first time Howard one of the UKs most notorious figures Marks has granted access to his highly organised and extraordinarily eclectic perFollowing his recent announcement that he sonal archive, allowing director Sam Rowtragically has inoperable bowel cancer, Howland complete freedom to digitise illuminatard Marks has launched a Pledge campaign to ing scenes from 100s of hours of footage. complete an intimate documentary film that Featuring interviews with hitherto unbrings his extraordinary story up to date. As known collaborators in Howard's hashish an extended friend of the family, House will empire, previously illusive and unlikely welcome back Howard Marks to host an inticandidates have finally come out of the mate dinner and poolside Q&A where guests woodwork as they watch the war on drugs recede. Their strange tales reveal the often hilarious inside story of the real Creech and Chongs. Studying all aspects of the once notoriSchedule: 20:30 welcome drinks 21:00 ous smuggler, “The Real Mr Nice” private dinner with Howard marks shines a light on sides of Howard’s life Cost: 50€ (welcome drink, 3 course dinner, ½ bottle house wine and and personality not previously revealed to mineral water) the media - his hobbies, academic endeavNote: top 25 bidders above the ours, family life, friendships and 1970s standard package price of 50€ will career in music production. dine with Howard Marks. Send all This exclusive event will provide a very bids to …. events@ibizarockshouse.com rare chance to share time and stories with the title "dinner with Howwith our friend, Howard Marks, for a ard marks". Bids must be over cause as great as the man himself. 50€

Info & Book

http://www.pledgemusic.com/ projects/howardmarks

Page 7

Exclusive Dinner, Q&A & Fundraiser with

Howard Marks Thursday 28th May 2015

The Ibizan, Thursday 14th May 2015, Issue 783

www.theibizan.com

Page 8

At Night 16th May. With DJ Oliver, Angel Linde, Clara da Costa, Jason Bye and resident Steeve Valverde providing the tunes, as well as the visually stunning dancers, acrobats and aerialists, there is no doubt that Es Paradis’ party, to mark their 40th anniversary, will be one of the most memorable nights of the year. We advise to get down there early to avoid queues, as it’ll be rammed to the very top of its iconic pyramidic rafters.

Food benefit, Las Dalias

Eden

It´s great to hear that Eden is back in safe hands this year after last season´s disastrous attempt at club promotion by Gatecrasher. After talking with Saturday night´s Faux Basement guys about the unconfirmed line-ups, it´s safe to say that Eden will soon be back on the Ibiza map where it belongs.

Plastik

We have a double helping of Plastik this weekend with the official opening on Fri 15th May followed by the Es Paradis pre-party on Sat 16th May. The opening will see Paul Reynolds, Giuliano A.L and birthday boy Dermot C behind the decks. As always expect celebrity guests and plenty of banter.

Es Paradis 40th Anniversary

Marking the official start of the clubber’s summer is the notorious Es Paradis opening party on Saturday

The nice people at ROOTS FESTIVAL IBIZA are holding "A World in Solidarity" festival this Sunday May 17th in Las Dalias, near Sant Carles. It’s all in aid of the Food Bank, and there’s a novel way of getting into the event. Walk into any Eroski store on the island, donate a basket of food and then grab your ticket. It all kicks off at 5pm and features Latin reggae legend Gondwana, who’s worth a basket of food on his own. GONDWANA (Chile) Flordhiguera (Mallorca) Aiyé (Percussion AfroIsleña) Dj Al Varo (Radio Babylonia) World flavours, fruit shakes and more surprises.

Café Mambo Opening Party

San Antonio’s Sunset Strip will be fully operational on Friday 15th May as Mambo opens its doors for their 21st season. Long-time residents Jason Bye and Pete Gooding are joined by special guest John Digweed in the hallowed DJ booth, spinning a combination of old and future classics. The terrace, bar and restaurant will be fully stocked and, no doubt, Mambo’s own brand of hierbas will be flowing freely. Visual entertainment will be provided by the sunset, Jason Bye’s body popping and a combination of tourists, island heroes and famous faces getting a little excited.

The only cure for Hard Times

It’s hard to believe that legendary house crew Hard Times have never had a full season in Ibiza. That’s all set to change this year as the famous Yorkshire house brand, who started way back in the ‘90s, have secured Saturday nights at the beautiful Vista Club in Privilege. Appearing throughout the season on Vista Club’s awesome Funktion One sound system are Roger Sanchez, Derrick Carter and DJ Sneak. Hard Times carry a lot of heritage and a reputation for ‘proper’ house music. Make sure to check out the opening party on June 20th with Todd Terry & Junior Sanchez.

The Ibizan, Thursday 14th May 2015, Issue 783

Pikes

Claire B

Carwash

Disco is back! Friday May 15th sees ‘Carwash’ returning to Pikes. The original Carwash founder Nigel Atkin and seasoned Carwash resident Steve Altman will be joined with Ibiza residents Scott Gray and Andy Bailey to recreate the original essence of this much loved event. The last one was great fun, so get the glitter out and dust down your dancing shoes for a night of retro disco and nu disco sounds.

Pikes on Sundays

New for 2015 is ‘Pikes on Sundays’. Starting on May 17th, Mark and Sarah Broadbent and Andy Livesey will make the ‘House’ their home. Having sound tracked Sundays on Ibiza since 2000, promoting the original Balearic party spirit with the legendary ‘We Love’ at Space, Mark and Sarah Broadbent together with Andy Livesey (Big L) are embarking on a new adventure at Pikes. They’ll be joined by sets from friends and family, label nights, island residents and surprise special guests until the small hours. More info at:

http://on.fb.me/1y0M78Z

Denim n leather

Don´t be surprised to see 100s of rockers in town this week for the 6th H.R.H. annual roadtrip where hundreds of Bikers , Rockers and Metal enthusiasts decend into San Antonio for their annual gathering. This years event will be headlined but the world famous Ragga Metal outfit, Skindred, who will be joined by 20 other Rock n Metal bands from across the globe. HRH Ibiza will be live at San Antonio V Club in the west end from Wednesday 13th May until Sunday 17th May, See the programme at

www.hrhroadtrip.com

Donnegans

Fun-time family friendly Irish bar Donnegans opens Thurs 14th May with live performances from Nell Shakespeare and The Holics. Music begins at 4pm and there will be free tapas, special drinks and of course plenty of Craic.

www.theibizan.com

Page 9

The Ibizan, Thursday 14th May 2015, Issue 783

www.theibizan.com

Page 10

Community ... Informal Praise Tel. 638373479 English-speaking Church on Ibiza and Form. Tel. 971 343383

View from the Pew “A cheerful heart is good medicine…” Proverbs 18:21 A man was being tailgated by a stressed out woman on a busy avenue, when suddenly, the light turned yellow, just in front of him. He did the right thing and stopped, even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection. The tailgating woman hit the roof, and the horn, screaming in frustration as she missed her chance to get through the intersection. As she was still in mid-rant, she heard a tap on her window and looked up into the face of a very serious police officer. The officer ordered her to exit her car with her hands up. He took her to the police station where she was searched, finger printed, photographed, and placed in a holding cell. After several hours, a policeman approached the cell and opened the door. She was escorted back to the booking desk where the arresting officer was waiting with her personal effects. He said I'm very sorry for this mistake. You see, I pulled up behind your car while you were blowing your horn, flipping off the guy in front of you, and cursing a blue streak at him. I noticed the 'Choose Life' license plate, the 'What Would Jesus Do?' bumper sticker, the 'Follow Me to Messy Church' bumper sticker, and the chrome-plated Christian fish emblem on the boot. Naturally, I assumed you had stolen the car. “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” Romans 12:2 Next service: Sun 17th of May at San Rafael Church – 10:30am Holy Communion with Praise and Worship. ICS Seasonal services: May 17th at RC Chapel, Es Canar at 10:30am Holy Communion and Hotel Panorana, Es Canar 17:45

It’s Good To Talk Kate Stillman

Dear Good to talk, I have a 15 year old son and he is driving me nuts! I know teenagers can be challenging but he is on his phone or computer all the time and only ever seems to talk to his dad and me when he wants something. Is this normal? The other mums all say how charming he is but to me they could be talking about another child! Do you have any ideas about how we can start to build a relationship again, it makes me sad and we used to be so close. Thanks you, AD. Dear AD, Thank you for your letter and I am sorry you are feeling sad about the relationship you have with your son. Social media is an amazing invention it has enabled all sorts of wonderful communications to happen but it does at the same time often create a block to conversation and face to face interaction. There are things to obviously look out for. Does your son have a regular group of friends that he socializes with or is he drifting from group to group? How is he getting on at school? What do other parents think of him? I know you said it feels like they are talking about someone else but my feeling is that if he was in any way getting too involved in some social media it would dominate all his time and not just his time at home. It’s challenging when children become teenagers, they start to need their parents less, it can bring up all sorts of feelings around rejection and time moving on too quickly. It is interesting that you say your relationship

with him needs building, I wonder if he feels the same? Maybe there is a clash between what you both need and this is causing friction for you that he maybe unaware of. I hope this has been of some help, I am not saying for one moment that you are over reacting, so please do not think I am, I am simply saying that your needs and his maybe different and unless you are both given the opportunity to say what you need from the other you will never be able to meet a happy compromise. Warm Regards, Kate. For contact details see Kate’s advert in local services.

Youth Rock Festival, San Jordi Claire B

On Saturday May 16th as part of the ongoing fiesta in San Jordi there’s a Festival of Youth Rock, with Aarón Coll, Difference, Tales of Gloom and Please (U2 tribute band). Starts at 9.30pm in the Plaça de Sant Jordi, which is the open space behind the church. Full fiesta programme: http://bit.ly/1OafXPI

Music courses in Ibiza Claire B

The School of Music in Ibiza is offering 17 courses this summer. The courses are aimed at students who already have some experience of playing and include piano, violin, clarinet, saxophone, cello, flute, trumpet, oboe, trombone, marching jazz band, as well as singing. Registration ends on May 20TH. List of courses, times and prices: http://bit.ly/1FaMIGo More info and registration form from here: http://bit.ly/1IvBezL

Puig d’en Valls Fiestas Nicole Torres

The fiestas in Puig d’en Valls have started and there are many things to do for everyone. There will be children’s activities almost every day like gymkhanas, Cachirulo the clown, storytelling, workshops, mini-Flower Power, a foam party, and many more things. There will be various sporting events: football, clay pigeon shooting, motocross, skating, walking, etc. There are many different types of concerts and exhibitions, different groups (collas) will perform ball pagés, a carriages parade, fire show, adult’s Flower Power, an adult gymkhana, markets, etc. For dates, times and more information about the events visit http://www.santaeulalia.net/

The Ibizan, Thursday 14th May 2015, Issue 783

Medieval Festival in Pictures Claire B

The annual medieval festival was held in Ibiza town last weekend, and once again the streets in and around Dalt Vila were packed with visitors, roving musicians, animals, market stalls and numerous stalls selling food and drinks.

www.theibizan.com

Page 11

Sport

The Ibizan, Thursday 14th May 2015, Issue 783

www.theibizan.com

Page 12

Jezza’s Sports Report ... Jeremy Parmenter Lots of mixed emotions this last week in the sporting world, so let's start with

Tennis Ecstacy for Brit Andy Murray who is definitely on a winning streak at the mo', as he won the ATP Madrid Open on Sunday, having already won the Munich tournament last time out. He produced arguably his best performance ever on clay, his least favourite surface, to beat holder and clay specialist, Rafa Nadal in straight sets, to set him up nicely for the French Major in a fortnight. Maybe his recent marriage has got summat to do with it, as he appears so much more relaxed and contented. As for the Mallorcan, he just wasn't at the races in the Final and has now, surprisingly, dropped to world No. 7, which beggars the question, has he blown himself out after all these years.

Golf Frustration for Spaniard Sergio Garcia at the Players Championship in Sawgrass, USA as having

battled thru' 4 rounds to be in a 3 way tie with two Americans, Fowler and Kisner, at the end of the final round, he lost out in the play-off, eventually won by Fowler, but it was good to see Spain's No 1 getting back to form. Brits McIlroy and Donaldson both did well to finish in the top 10, completing the 4 day event in 8 under.

Cycling Delight for Brit Mark Cavendish as he won his 10th win of the season in the opening stage of the Tour of California, to give the Manxman the advantage overall. Rugby Union In the Premiership, and the race for the Play-offs, both Northampton and Bath cemented their 1 and 2 places, but with one game to go, there's only a point diff between 3rd, 4th and 5th, with Leicester, in 3rd and there was a real tussle at Saracens, now out of the top 4 on points diff, who lost at home to 4th placed Exeter, so it all comes down to this w/end, altho' my money's on Saracens as they play relegated London Welsh in what should be a 5 pointer, whilst Leicester are at home to leaders Northampton and Exeter are at home to Sale

but it could come down to a bonus point.

Rugby League Disappointment for Super League leaders Leeds as they, surprisingly, lost at Widnes whilst Wigan in 2nd, closed the gap to 2 points after their win. Mind you, Wigan's cause was also helped by 3rd placed St Helens surprise loss at Catalans to keep the kettle boiling.

Footie With Chelsea having already won the Premier League (and thank you Rod, for paying up already, I know how much it hurt you!) all eyes were on the tussle for those

other 3 CL places, and Frustration for Liverpool, as their hopes were dashed at the Bridge after a 1-.1 draw and Man U's late winner in a 2-1 win at Crystal Palace to virtually assure themselves of at least 4th spot. As for Man City and Arsenal, interesting, as after City's 6-0 humbling of now relegated QPR at the Etihad, Arsenal do have two games in hand as they play tonight and are only 3 points behind. Come on the Gunners, let's make it a 1,2 for the Capital! At t'other end, it's adios to both Burnley and QPR, despite the former's 1-0 win at Hull, themselves now really in the Pooh, languishing in 18th, but they're not the only ones, as Newcastle are only 2 points ahead after their 1-1 draw at home to WBA, on the same points as Sunderland, after their crucial 2-0 win at Everton but also with a game in hand. Leicester, 2-0 winners at home to Southampton, are a point ahead and even Aston Villa aren't safe yet, as they're only another point ahead, even after their 1-0 home win over West Ham. So, with only 2 games to go, 5 clubs split by 4 points for that last relegation place, but my money's on Bruce's Hull for the drop as they have to play Tottenham away and Man U at home, by far the more difficult run-in. In the Championship play-offs for

the Wembley Final and that last remaining promotion spot (not forgetting the added bonus of 120m odd Pounds!) after the first legs it's all square at 1-1 between those East Anglian neighbours Ipswich and Norwich (so no doubt, Our Ed is chewing his fingernails at the mo'!) whilst Middlesboro' have the advantage over Brentford, by dint of their 21 away win. In La Liga, it's looking all over now, after Real Madrid's disappointing 2-2 draw including a Cristiano penalty miss as they now trail Barça by 4 points with only two games left, Barça having scraped a 2-0 win. Finally, after last week's Champions League first legs, my wish for a Barça/Real Final in Berlin is still there, just, as, in the 2nd legs this week, Real have to believe that they can turn over a 2-1 deficit at the Bernabeu over Italians Juventus, while the Catalans thumped Bayern 3-0 at the Nou Camp with that man Messi helping himself to a stunning brace and I can't see a German comeback from 3 down but you never know! Let's hope Ronaldo and Messi can do the biz because wouldn't it be great to see the 2 best players in the world in opposition in the Final. 'Tis all for this week, “disfrute el tiempo” and until next week, Jezza.

The Ibizan, Thursday 14th May 2015, Issue 783

www.theibizan.com

Page 13

Spanish Grand Prix, Barcelona Rhian Gibbs

Rosberg wins comfortably Ferrari still suffering Button “scariest first 30 laps of my life” We start the European circuit in Barcelona for the fifth race of the season. Rosberg has piped Hamilton to pole but Mercedes have the front row once again. Rosberg made a fantastic start and any thoughts Hamilton had of nicking the lead were quashed by initial clutch problems, he lost a place to Vettel with Bottas nearly passing as well. From there, Hamilton was stuck behind the Ferrari with Rosberg pulling further ahead; a strategy change for Hamilton to a 3-stop did give him the undercut later on and back into second place, but a slow pit stop put him truly out of the running to catch Rosberg and he comfortably took the chequered flag with the Brit 2nd place. Vettel and Ferrari had high hopes for the weekend but 3rd was the best he could do with the not-so prancing horse, Raikkonen was held in 5th place by Bottas of Williams who did a great job finishing 4th, Massa crossed the line 6th after fighting up 3 places earning Williams more vital points. Red Bull’s Ricciardo was happy with 7th despite both cars lacking pace, Kvyat took 10th after losing a place to Sainz

of Toro Rosso on the final lap, no action was taken by the stewards & Sainz held on to 9th. Lotus will be pleased to walk away with Grosjean’s 8th place finish after a less than straightforward race. Maldonado was in the run for 7th but a brush with his teammate damaged his rear wing and, once again, he was forced to retire lap 45. Grosjean mustered on despite having gear problems but overshot his second pit stop hitting his front jack man. Fortunately a sprained wrist, ligament damage and bruised “parts” were the injuries sustained. Verstappen finished 11th for Toro Rosso after using his tyres too quickly and suffering the consequence. Nasr in his Sauber managed 12th but felt he could do more, with Ericsson 14th both lacking grip. Force India suffered the same fate lacking down force and grip with Perez doing remarkably well getting 30 laps out of his tyres and taking 13th, Hulkenberg was on a 3-stop and finished 15th, around a second behind his teammate. McLaren had a hard weekend with Button struggling to control his car’s unpredictable handling which only gave rise to 16th place – later commenting “the first 30 laps were the scariest of my life”. Alonso by contrast struggled with his brakes and after overshooting his pit they retired his car (lap 26) – a tear-off visor was found blocking the brake duct causing the brake overheating and eventual retirement. Marussia finished the race with Stevens 17th and Merhi 18th, they may have been last, 3 and 4 laps down respectively but a good finish for the team and both drivers. So to some news, Barcelona have confirmed their F1 contract renewal and we’ll continue to see races at the Circuit de Catalunya until 2019 at least. The European races have been the focus of many debate recently following the loss of the German Grand Prix at the Nurburgring this year, and still no agreement has been reached for the continuation of the Italian race at Monza beyond 2016. The final gossip we hear is Red Bull’s apparent announcement they will quit Formula 1 unless Audi join forces with them. Renault have been unable to give them a competitive engine and now it seems they have had enough. Their

contract to race in F1 ends in 2020 and they are also contracted to Renault for another year – watch this space for more news. Monte Carlo is the next race 22-24th May. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5.

Nico Rosberg Mercedes 01:41:12.555 25 Lewis Hamilton Mercedes +00:17.511 18 Sebastian Vettel Ferrari +00:45.342 15 Valtteri Bottas Williams +00:59.217 12 Kimi Raikkonen Ferrari +01:00.002 10

www.theibizan.com

Classifieds & Services The Ibizan, Thursday 14th May 2015, Issue 783

Transport

Trades

Insurance

Personal

Animals

Classifieds Cleaner needed For house in Santa Agnes. Twice a week - 10 hours total Call 674 122 952 if interested

Page 14

Information ... Crime. Contact the Policia Nacional in English Tel 902 102 112

Emergencies 112 092 091 061 902109356

Pharmacies. For Details Including Out Of Hours www.COFIB.es Medical Centres. Information & Online Appointments http://bit.ly/ibizandoctor

Police

Friday 22º

Guardia Civil Eivissa Guardia Civil San Antonio Guardia Civil Sta. Eularia Guardia Civil San Joan Local Police Sta. Eulalia Local Police San Jose Local Police San Antonio

971301100 971340502 971330227 971333005 971330841 971800261 971340830

ITV . To Book A Vehicle For An ITV Online http://bit.ly/ibizanitv

Exchange Rate:13 May 15 €:£ 0.7208 £:€ 1.3869 Euro to GBP Past Month

Medical

Saturday 22o

Alcoholics Anonymous Narcotics Anonymous Homeless Shelter Doctor and Nurse (ATS) Home Visit Ambulances Rosario Clinic Del Mar Red Cross Clinic Can Misses Hospital

616088883 902114147 971190966 971399977 971399977 971301916 971191212 971397000

Transport

Sunday 23º

Airport (information) Iberia/Air Nostrum Air Europa Ryanair Easyjet British Airways Norwegian Airways Transmediterranea Balearia Mediterranea Pitiusa

971809000 902400500 902401501 +44 8712460011 11899 902111333 902484080 902454645 902160180 971322443

0.750 0.740 0.730 0.720 0.710 0.700 13 May

Fire Local Police Guardia Civil (Police) Ib-Salud British Consulate

06 May

Thursday 28o