N00Z
“SQUAWK!” What is that sound?
Campanile bells replaced with rubber chickens.
N00Z PAGE 3
IMPORTANT STUFF
Revolutionary squirrels take over the Northern Iowa Student Government office.
IMP. STUFF PAGE 4
VOLUME 119, ISSUE 46
YAYY GO TEAM
AJ Green’s previously unknown twin siblings are set to take over UNI basketball.
YAYY TEAM PAGE 6
How UNI is creating and supporting the next generation of women’s history-makers
BAILEY KLINKHAMMER Staff Writer
UNI’s campus is chockfull of organizations to get involved in. Of these organizations, no two are alike or serve the same purpose. These organizations participate in a variety of activities, like host activities for students to attend, host political activists and educate, make space for minority communities on campus, or create forward thinking media. The female leadership at UNI uplifts these communities and drives these organizations forward.
“Uprising has been a really nice creative outlet. It lets me explore different ways to channel my creativity,” Ireland Frisch commented on her experience with the on-campus magazine, Uprising. Frisch serves as the co-editor in chief for the publication, serving alongside Mia Rampton. Although she’s served as a co-editor for four semesters, Frisch was originally nervous to join the magazine, and remained reserved during her first semester. “It was my TAPs professor who plugged it during class, she’s the advisor, so I decided to go for it. It was
COURTESY/UNI BSU INSTAGRAM
Lexi Gause, pictured center, is the co-president of UNI’s Black Student Union. She is one of many women at UNI who have stepped up into leadership roles thanks in part to the sense of community and support in her organization.
the only club I decided to join.” Frisch moved from a member of Uprising to co-editor two years ago. According to Frisch, the co-editor role is a lot more logistic-oriented than some might think. “Each semester our job is to come up with a theme for the magazine and coordinate how our committees will interpret the theme. We do a lot of behind the scenes work.”
The upward movement has served as a lesson in leadership not just for herself, but in leading an executive team as well. “It’s easy for us [the executive team] to get along. This leap of faith in deciding to take on a leadership role, getting out of my comfort zone, it’s been so rewarding.” Uprising’s spring semester issue is set to release the week of April 17th, which will be Frisch’s last issue as
co-editor in chief. “Part of the reason I was able to become a leader is because I learned how to feel comfortable giving feedback…If I had to give advice to anyone apprehensive about becoming a leader, I’d say absolutely take that leap of faith.”
The president of the Northern Iowan Feminists (NIF), Madeline Hinz, spoke on how wanting to find a com-
munity for activism to be a part of affected what organization she wanted to join. “I was motivated to join a student org by my own personal interest in finding a community that had similar interests and passions as mine. I was also interested in activism, something I hadn’t had much of an opportunity to explore before college. In my hometown growing up, I lacked a community I felt safe in regarding my politics and social values, but was able to find that here at UNI with NIF right away.”
After finding NIF, Hinz knew immediately that she wanted to be involved on their leadership team. According to Hinz, that leap to leadership is one of the most fulfilling things she’s done. “Being involved in NIF gave me the opportunity to be a leader in ways I was never able to before coming to UNI…While each of the responsibilities I took on brought a new challenge, each one also allowed me to make new meaningful connections and taught me valuable skills that have helped me grow as a person.”
See FEMALE LEADERS, page 2
MALLORY SCHMITZ Escritora
MADDIE KASPERBAUER Traductora invitada
JASON FELICIANO Traductor invitado
Nota de la editora: Maddie
Kasperbauer y Jason Feliciano son estudiantes del curso SPAN
3159 Translation for Heritage
Speakers, dirigido por el Prof. Juan Carlos Castillo.
Mientras la mayoría de la población estudiantil de UNI estará ausente del campus este verano, un grupo de empleados y estudiantes de UNI se están preparando actualmente para dar la bienvenida a una audiencia diferente este julio.
Del 17 al 21 de julio, UNI será la anfitriona del Campamento de Verano Meskwaki por segundo año consecutivo.
Este programa está dirigido a estudiantes de la comunidad Meskwaki entrantes a los grados séptimo al décimo, y se centra en la preparación para la universidad y la carrera profesional.
Marcy Seavy es la coordinadora de STEM (ciencia, tecnología, ingeniería y matemáticas) en UNI y sirve en el comité de planificación para el programa.
“Mucho de lo que [los estudiantes] pueden hacer cuando están aquí es explorar no solo lo que ellos podrían hacer, sino también cómo podrían prepararse para tener el futuro que ellos quieren”, dijo ella.
“Nosotros les damos muchas oportunidades para que puedan explorar quiénes son y qué son sus intereses, para dejar que se sumerjan en una cosa especí-
fica y que tengan experiencias con sus compañeros en el campus, para hacer que el campus sea un espacio menos misterioso”, dijo Seavy. “Después de estar viviendo en las residencias por una semana, ir a los comedores, y caminar por el campus entre sesiones, entonces puede sentirse como un lugar que conoces muy bien”.
El campamento está estructurado para que los estudiantes pasen la mañana en sesiones grupales grandes sobre la preparación universitaria y profesional, dirigidas por miembros del personal de UNI. Después del almuerzo en uno de los comedores, los estudiantes se dividen en grupos más pequeños para sesiones de aprendizaje más especializadas.
Este verano, el campamento ofrecerá una sesión centrada
en la ciencia medioambiental y la soberanía alimentaria, que permitirá que los estudiantes aprendan más sobre la pesca, la agricultura, la salud del suelo
cultivable, y otros temas medioambientales que afectan a sus propias comunidades.
Ver CAMPAMENTO, página 2
COURTESY/LINDSEY HUBBELL
El Campamento de Verano Meskwaki se enfoca en preparaciones universitarias y profesionales. Mientras algunas sesiones sucede de configuraciones de grupos grandes, estudiantes también pueden dividirse en grupos pequeños para sesiones especializadas.
continued from page 1
Hinz has found a strong community to support her through NIF, and she knows that the same communities await others on UNI’s campus, “Student leadership teams at UNI put their hearts into creating events for us, and it means so much to us when even a handful of the UNI community joins us. So, if you have yet to attend or explore a UNI student org, try one out, give one a chance, and push outside of your comfort zone! You might just love it and find a community you didn’t know you needed.”
Lexi Gause, co-president of the Black Student Union, was elected to her position as a
CAMPAMENTO extendida de página 1
La segunda sesión confirmada para este verano se centrará en el emprendimiento. Los estudiantes aprenderán a conocer a su base de clientes y a utilizar los recursos de creación de podcasts de UNI para aprender a promocionar un producto, entre otras actividades.
El campamento planea tener una sesión más para ofrecer a los estudiantes, pero todavía está en proceso de finalizar en qué consistirá. Actualmente se están aceptando propuestas de miembros de la facultad.
Mientras que 2023 marca solo el segundo año consecutivo para este programa, no es la primera vez que UNI y la comunidad Meskwaki han colaborado. Desde 2014 a 2017, se llevó a cabo un programa similar dirigido a estudiantes de la secundaria en la facultad de educación, pero se descontinuó. La idea de la programación de verano se reavivó hace solo unos años.
“Hace un par de años, los líderes de la comunidad Meskwaki y el presidente de la universidad empezaron a reunirse, y una de las cosas de las que hablaron mucho fue: ¿qué cosas pueden hacer la universidad y la comunidad Meskwaki juntas?”, dijo Seavey.
“En realidad ya no quedaba en el campus mucha gente que hubiera estado involucrada en [el programa] en el pasado”,
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sophomore, offering a unique perspective on leadership.
“It helped me learn how to deal with issues, it was a huge jump from being a member and sitting in meetings to running the meetings.” She also accredits some of her Center for Multicultural Education (CME) advisors for pushing her to apply and seeing the leader in her. “The CME staff brought me affirmations and really saw the leader in me. After some convincing from them I took the step and applied.”
Gause is poised to grow not just herself and her executive team, but the entire chapter of the UNI Black Student Union.
“It’s allowed me to grow not just as a leader but a person…
Along with that, the entire executive team is brand new
dijo ella. “Así que nos reunimos con un par de miembros del Programa de Educación Superior Meskwaki y hablamos sobre lo que debería ser este campamento, y luego formamos un equipo de planificación para diseñarlo y seguir adelante con la coordinación. Ese equipo de planificación es tanto de personas del campus como del Programa de Educación Superior Meskwaki”.
Como aparece en su página de Facebook, el Programa de Educación Superior Meskwaki es una organización en Tama, Iowa, que cree en “ayudar a los miembros de la tribu Meskwaki inscritos y a sus descendientes a que obtengan una educación superior”.
Un aspecto clave del Campamento de Verano Meskwaki es cuán personalizada puede ser la experiencia para los estudiantes. En 2022, el programa tuvo la asistencia de 22 estudiantes, lo que significa que las sesiones de aprendizaje de la tarde contenían grupos de seis a diez estudiantes.
Este tamaño tan pequeño de los grupos también permitió que se hicieran conexiones significativas entre los estudiantes y el personal.
Jesús Lizárraga Estrada es uno de los codirectores del campamento por segundo año consecutivo, y, el año pasado, pasó toda la semana trabajando en colaboración con los estudiantes asistentes.
“Para mí fue una experiencia muy enriquecedora para todos
EDITORIAL STAFF MALLORY SCHMITZ News Editor schmimbt@uni.edu
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DAVID WARRINGTON Sports Editor warringd@uni.edu
SOPHIE HOFFMEIER Copy Editor hoffmeis@uni.edu
KARINA ORTIZ Spanish Editor ortizkac@uni.edu
to the team, so we’re growing alongside each other and coaching each other through our mistakes. Even though we’re all growing in our leadership abilities, we remind ourselves and each other ‘you got this position for a reason’, kind of taking on that leader/mentor mentality.”
Gause also acknowledges how nerve-wracking it can be to step up as an underclassman, but knows that the potential for success is limitless. “Step out of your comfort zone, it’s okay to try something and not like it, but you’ll truly never know unless you try.”
The Campus Activities Board (CAB) is known for their campus wide engaging events for students. From concerts to Panther Hot Ones and
even their new event, CAB After Dark, CAB is always finding new ways to engage students. At the helm of this organization is Valerie Beary, their Executive Director.
“When I was a freshman, I was at the organization fair and a girl at the CAB table told me all about CAB and I knew I wanted to be involved in it, but I don’t think I ever would have envisioned myself as the Executive Director!” Beary acknowledges that a lot of her growth as a leader has come from the executive teams that surround her, not just in CAB but in her sorority Alpha Sigma Tau as well. “It’s such a great support system…I appreciate their openness, flexibility, and willingness to just do crazy things!” Beary mentioned how
she also felt apprehensive taking on leadership roles, but it was the people around her who coaxed the leader out of her. Her advice? Reach out! “You never know what’s out there if you don’t look for it. Keep moving forward, keep taking those opportunities. You never grow if you don’t step out of your box.”
What all of these leaders have in common, beyond their leadership roles, is the fact that they all took a risk and stepped outside of their comfort zone. But, they’ve all benefited and grown from taking that risk. Female leaders are taking shape at UNI, across all organizations. Their impact, encouragement and wisdom plants seeds of inspiration for the leaders to follow them.
COURTESY/LINDSEY HUBBELL
El programa todavía está aceptando propuestas para una última sesión educativa para los estudiantes qué están interesados.
los participantes. Creo que para nosotros, vimos un crecimiento en que, inicialmente, cuando [los estudiantes] entraron, no nos hablaban mucho, pero para el quinto día, vimos que se volvían más extrovertidos, no solo con nosotros, sino con otros en su grupo”, dijo.
Janine Baeza, la otra codirectora del campamento, pudo conectarse con los estudiantes el verano pasado gracias a sus experiencias como estudiante universitaria de primera generación. “Para mí, solo podía convertirme en una médica o maestra si iba a la universidad, y luego llegué a la universidad y me di cuenta de que hay muchas otras carreras y opciones. Me sentí abrumada por tantas opciones. Así que ese es uno de los grandes objetivos del campamento, la exposición temprana a todos los diferentes tipos de carreras que puedes tener si persigues un título universitario”, dijo.
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Los estudiantes también están acompañados para guiarlos durante todo el día por consejeros estudiantiles, quienes son estudiantes actuales de UNI que vienen también de la comunidad Meskwaki. Como dijo Lizárraga Estrada, este tipo de representación puede tener un impacto significativo en los futuros estudiantes.
“Para muchos estudiantes, puede haber sido su primera vez en un campus universitario y ver a un estudiante universitario que se parece a ellos, que está teniendo éxito en un campus universitario, y escuchar sus consejos, creo que es muy poderoso”, dijo él. “Muchas veces no tenemos la oportunidad de ver a personas que se parecen a nosotros en los campus universitarios, así creo que el impacto ocurrió más allá de las sesiones, y también en esa relación entre los consejeros del campamento y los participantes”.
The Northern Iowan is published semi-weekly on Monday and Thursday during the academic year, except for holidays and examination periods, by the University of Northern Iowa, L011 Maucker Union, Cedar Falls, IA 50614-0166 under the auspices of the Board of Student Publications.
Advertising errors that are the fault of the Northern Iowan will be corrected at no cost to the advertiser only if the Northern Iowan office is notified within seven days of the original publication. Publisher reserves the right to refuse any advertisement at any time.
The Northern Iowan is funded in part with student activity fees.
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Baeza continuó: “Creo que muchas veces, la universidad hace declaraciones sobre el trabajo con la diversidad, la equidad y la inclusión, como que realmente queremos trabajar bien con estudiantes de color y apoyar a estudiantes de color, y a veces se siente que no llega ni al cumplimiento ni a la acción”.
“Este fue uno de esos momentos en los que realmente estamos tratando de construir una relación con la Nación Meskwaki, y este campamento fue parte de eso”, dijo ella. “Se sintió como un buen paso adelante en esa relación y creo que definitivamente nos ayudó a acercar más a las dos comunidades”.
Los profesores de UNI interesados en enviar una propuesta para la opción de la última sesión de la tarde pueden comunicarse con Macy Seavey en seavey@uni.edu.
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After six long months, students are finally able to hear the sweet sounds of the Campanile at the top of every hour. However, the sounds coming from the campus icon post-refurbishing have resembled less of a tender “ding dong” and more of a “SQUAAAAAAWK.”
The Campanile bells have been replaced with rubber chickens of various sizes. The bells originally left campus in October to be refurbished and to have a few more bells cast for the carillon instrument.
Due to a shipping mixup, the Campanile bells and
carillon never arrived at the renowned Doorvin Bell Company for their refurbishing. Instead, they were sent to Doorvin Clown School.
“When these bells showed up on our doorstep, we didn’t want to disappoint!” Jojo the clown said. “We used what we had on hand and really made the carillon our own, and we hope the university finds joy in the final product!”
That final product includes five octaves of rubber chickens, totalling 60 silicone birds in total. When struck, each chicken lets out its own airy, shrill cluck corresponding with a different note on the scale.
The Guild of Carillonneurs has since rebranded to the Guild of Cluck-illonneurs, and according to president Ida Bellplayer, the group is taking advantage of this unique opportunity.
“We’re looking at this mixup as an opportunity for artistic freedom and exploration,” she said. “As far as I know, no one has ever played songs on five octaves of rubber chickens. We are excited to continue to bring songs to life for all of campus to hear.”
UNI is now home to the world’s only rubber chicken carillon, the latest addition to the university’s many accolades.
I also left my laptop changer in Schindler so I guess I’m not getting that back anytime soon.”
It’s a bird! It’s a plane! It’s Schindler Education Center! For years students have noticed Schindler looks suspiciously like a UFO, and these suspicions were confirmed last Friday when the top half of the building broke off and hurled itself into the atmosphere at light speed. Luckily, no students or professors were present when the UFO blasted into space.
The Dean for the College of Education, Molleen Culholland, responded to this incident stating, “Our education department is, quite literally, out of this world. We are actively working with President Nark Mook to see what steps can be taken to retrieve the top half of our building.”
Contact with the aliens has been attempted by members of UNI’s IT department, however they have yet to hear back concerning the whereabouts of the aliens and UFO.
Education student Al E. Gator was aghast to learn of the UFO’s presence.
“I’ve always thought Schindler kind of looked like a UFO, but I never would have thought it was an actual UFO.
An investigation ordered by President Nark Mook following the UFO’s startling departure found the construction of Schindler was a cover up by the U.S. government to hide a UFO in 1973. The U.S. government has refused to comment on this matter.
Due to the current condition of Schindler, education students
have been temporarily moved into Curris Business Building. This has caused slight annoyance between business and education majors, as some elementary education majors have taken to be-dazzling Curris with inspirational bulletin boards and colorful stickers. The Board of Regents has been contacted by university officials to get funding to rebuild Schindler as soon as possible.
MALIBU SCHMOOTZ Former Infant CARL MCCHRISTENSEN Human BeanSome Guy
UNI’s iconic Campanile has been kept in a chain link fence for the past several months. The part that UNI faculty left out was the reason why.
On the morning of Wednesday, March 29, the Campanile’s enclosure was discovered to be empty and the fence was left ajar. Officials have released a statement detailing the escape, estimating it to have taken place around 11:30 p.m. the previous night. They also believe the Campanile snuck behind Seerley during its escape. Luckily,
no bystanders sustained any injuries from the event. UNI police are taking statements from any student or faculty in the area at the time of the incident.
While the Campanile’s motives remain unknown, many students are speculating that the Campanile has been wanting to escape for a while, but now with its bells being replaced it could make a clean getaway without being heard.
Local law enforcement are still tracking the Campanile’s whereabouts and they would like to remind everyone that Campanile is about 100 feet tall, with red and brown bricks and a large clock on all sides. The Campanile
answers to the name Homer, is considered very docile, and shouldn’t pose any danger.
The Campanile has left local authorities baffled by how a 96 year old structure could escape so easily. They have turned to several possibilities including the involvement of an accomplice. The fence that held the Campanile was locked from the outside, giving easy access to anybody in the direct vicinity. So far no suspects have been brought in for questioning, but the campus will be notified of any changes. Nobody knows where the Campanile has gone. Very few clues were left in the
wake of its escape. Officials believe it may have gone somewhere sentimental, a place where it has good memories. The Campanile will be missed until it is safe -
ly returned and we can only hope it stays safe while local authorities attempt to locate the elusive structure.
To the shock and confusion of the student body, the UNI squirrels have taken over Northern Iowa Student Government (NISG) in a vicious coup.
Armed with acorns and a thirst for blood, the squirrels stormed the NISG offices Monday morning in a surprise attack. NISG members were quickly overwhelmed by the furry fiends and surrendered within the hour.
“We fought valiantly and down to the last man,” Ousted President Meila Lasinovic said. “There were just too many of them, there was nothing we could do.”
The ringleader of the squirrels, known as “Squeaker McSqeakens” has declared martial law. As one of his first actions in office, he has proclaimed everyday to be celebrated as National Acorn
Appreciation Day.
“This is simply outrageous,” UNI President Nark Mook said in a statement to the press. “This will not stand. The squirrels of UNI must be stopped and power returned to the students.”
A resistance group formed by NISG members
called “Down with the Nuts” has been working to usurp the squirrels and take back control.
“We have been taking several kickboxing classes at the Wellness Recreation Center to hone our skills,” Ousted Vice President Kicaiah Mrutsinger said. “Additionally,
we have been in contact with an exterminator and have purchased several squirrel traps.”
Until the squirrels are defeated, they will have the power to give funding to student organizations, lobby the state legislature and the Board of Regents among
other things.
“I have faith in our students that they will take back control of student government,” President Nark Mook said. “We will win the day against these violent vermin.”
We fought valiantly and down to the last man. There was to many of them, there was nothing we could do.
Meila Lasinovic
NISG President
NUKE NEIGHBORS
CARL MCCHRISTENSEN Human Bean
It is tradition that the Northern Iowan does an April Fool’s issue, which is famously known as the “French Fry.” This year, our editorial team is switching things up, and we asked the public online to nominate places with the best fries. With over 20 responses, you made your voices heard and we sought out to try every fry we could. On Wednesday, March 29, we held our first annual French Fry Competition to finally settle the debate and give you our take on the best fries in town.
Here are this year’s contestants:
• Pepperjax Grill
• Culver’s
• McDonald’s
• Raising Cane’s
• Pump Haus
• Chick-Fil-A
We had Oh My Grill on our list, but they were unfortunately not open at the time of the judging. Our editors
went one by one eating each establishment’s fries without a beverage. We would also like to note in the time of the judging that some of the fries were colder than others due to transportation and gathering all the fries in one setting. Our team took this into consideration.
The staff had a fun time judging each fry. There was no specific criteria for scoring — the scores were determined solely by the editor’s own judgment.
“It was like judging the least damaged piece of cardboard, but being surprised to find a flavorful fry in tip-top shape,” said Spanish Editor Karina Ortiz.
Yes, there were good fries, but unsurprisingly, there were some that were not up to the editor’s tastes.
“Some of the fries were bad — but some of them were downright awful. Atrocious, even,” said Copy Editor Sophie Hoffmeier.
After a back-and-forth war, some editors agreed that certain fries were decent, while
Chick-fil-A
Culver’s
McDonald’s
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others looked obviously soggy. A common observation among several of the fries we tried was that they lacked seasoning and flavor — but we’ll get to that in the individual reviews. Our ratings were based on a 5-star system.
The Northern Iowan’s first French Fry Competition came to a unanimous decision — Pump Haus took the crown for the best fries in town with a 4.5-star rating. In second place, McDonalds came with a 3-star rating. In third place, there was a tie between Pepperjax and Chickfil-a with a 2.5-star rating. In fourth place was Cane’s with a 1.5-star rating, and in dead last was Culver’s with a 1-star rating.
“It was decent,” said Diamond Roundtree, Campus Life Editor. The event closed off with the editors gathering around and eating the rest of the (now very cold) fries.
Let us know what you think! Do you agree with our rating?
The Northern Iowan is published semi-weekly on Monday and Thursday during the academic year, except for holidays and examination periods, by the University of Northern Iowa, L011 Maucker Union, Cedar Falls, IA 50614-0166 under the auspices of the Board of Student Publications.
Advertising errors that are the fault of the Northern Iowan will be corrected at no cost to the advertiser only if the Northern Iowan office is notified within seven days of the original publication. Publisher reserves the right to refuse any advertisement at any time.
The Northern Iowan is funded in part with student activity fees.
All material is © 2023 by the Northern Iowan and may not be used without permission.
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UNI basketball fans are all familiar with AJ Green. The all-time Panther great led UNI to two regular season Missouri Valley Conference (MVC) championships, and is now making waves with the NBA’s Milwaukee Bucks. Any Panther fan that watched Green play certainly wished at one point or another that they could have an entire team filled with just AJ Green. Well today, those fans are in luck.
UNI Head Coach Ben Jacobson announced today that UNI has signed five new players, BJ Green, CJ Green, DJ Green, EJ Green and TJ Green, all identical siblings of AJ. How these players flew under the radar and avoided public attention while their brother starred for the Panthers is anybody’s guess, and Coach Jacobson is just as curious about the situation as the rest of us.
“I have no idea where these kids came from,” said Coach Jacobson. “I mean, as long as I coached AJ and worked with his dad, you’d think I would’ve heard about this. Five twins? What is that, quintuplets? You’d think I would’ve heard about that.”
However, Coach Jacobson is not letting this confusion stop him from adding them to the UNI roster. “Look, I’m not asking questions. It’s five AJ Greens, I’m not turning that down.”
The Green siblings are all identical to AJ, both in appearance and in their game. This presents a huge problem to the MVC. The size and skillset, including their outstanding three point shooting, will be nearly impossible to stop when they get on the court.
“We look forward to continuing the legacy of the Green family in this program and bringing the Panthers back to the top,” explained EJ Green. At
least, we think it was EJ. We’re not totally sure.
“This is a special program,” began BJ Green (or was it CJ? TJ? Idk man, you tell me). “The Valley isn’t ready for what’s coming. Nobody has ever seen a team like this before.
However, this roster move isn’t without controversy, and raises plenty of questions. What is going to happen to the other top players? Will there be enough bench minutes to go around with five Greens running around the floor? How did the Green family hide five identical siblings? How will the Panthers make room on the team for these five new players? One would think some players will have to be cut from the team, so how will that play out? Seriously, where did these kids come from? Why is nobody else freaking out? Five kids, just hiding, never heard from until now? Anybody? Am I the crazy one here?
Hopefully all of these
questions will be answered in due time, but for now, what we know is this. One of the top players in the history of UNI’s program has essentially been multiplied to fill every spot on the
floor. How this could result in anything other than a conference championship is anyone’s guess, and the Panthers will certainly be a problem for the Valley this season.
CADEN ‘CANINE’ SHEA Sports Dude
The UNI track and field team will attempt to become the first NCAA school in the country to test the ‘Air Bud’ legal theory that has been found as a loophole in the collegiate handbook. Nowhere in the handbook does it say that the runner for the team has to be human. That is why the track team has recruited Rex Goodboy, a 3-year-old golden retriever from the Cedar Valley.
Goodboy is known as one of the premiere runners in the Cedar Falls area, being primarily a hunting dog until his recruiting by the college. “We’ve had many dogs,” said Goodboy’s owner Amanda, “but we have never had a dog like
Rex. He is fast, loyal and an all around team leader.”
Goodboy is 21 years old in dog years, making him eligible for college and being on the track team.
Goodboy will become the first ever dog to run the 100-meter dash this upcoming spring. “He’s one of the best runners we’ve had in a long time,” said Director of the UNI track and field team, David Paulsen. “He runs like an absolute animal, which makes a lot of sense if you really think about it.” One of the main reasons that Goodboy runs so fast is his dedication to the finish line. The assistant coaches sprinkle treats on his lane at the end of his race to give him a reward for running as fast as he can.
The loophole in the
NCAA handbook gets its namesake from the award-winning children’s movie Air Bud, in which a dog plays multiple sports including basketball, football and soccer. The movie was so influential that it inspired a best-selling spinoff film series entitled Air Buddies which chronicles the life of the puppies of the titular hero. But unlike Air Bud, Goodboy will look to make history in real life. The dog will become the first four-legged animal to run in a collegiate race.
“We pride ourselves on being a part of such monumental history,” Paulsen said. “Goodboy is beyond capable of taking our school to the next level and I can’t wait to see him thrive. Right now we have him in the 100-meter dash but we
are looking to have him in the long jump, hurdles and maybe even discuss if he is up for the challenge.”
“We can’t believe that they have chosen Rex to be a part of history,” said Amanda Goodboy. “He has been a member of our family for so long and it’s just amazing to see him grow into the dog that we always knew he could be.”
“WOOF WOOF WOOF
GRRRR WOOF RUFF
RUFF WOOF GRRRR
RUFFF!” said Rex Goodboy when asked about his upcoming race. He had a look of determination on his face that was quickly interrupted when he saw a squirrel.
Goodboy is one of the top athletes in regards to the recent NIL deal. He
is currently sponsored by PetSmart, Petco, Fetch.com, Raising Canes and Nike. He uses his brand to raise awareness for animal athletes all around the world that don’t have the platform to share their opinions.
When not preparing for his upcoming race, Goodboy is enrolled in UNI majoring in Athletic Training. We are told that he wants to develop the athletes of tomorrow into becoming history makers just like him. He is one of the top students in his class and currently has a 4.0 grade point average, showing what it means to be the definition of a student athlete. Goodboy will continue to be a trailblazer for the animal community as he continues in his record-breaking ways.
Ben Jacobson went in to sign a four-year contract extension worth four million dollars with the UNI men’s basketball team
on Monday, March 27. The legendary UNI men’s basketball coach just finished his 17th season leading the Panthers. He has 335 career wins, four Missouri Valley Conference (MVC) regular season championships,
four conference tournament championships and four NCAA Tournament appearances. All of these accomplishments meant there was no doubt that he should receive an extension. Unfortunately, there was a bit of an issue when Coach Jacobson went in to sign the contract.
When Coach Jacobson went to put pen to paper on his new deal, he noticed that there was a small issue in the contract. The contract was issued to a guy by the name of Ben Jacobsen, not Ben Jacobson. This may seem like a minor mistake that can be easily fixed, but by law, Ben Jacobsen is able to sign this contract and become the next UNI men’s basketball coach if he chooses. The question is, who is this Ben Jacobsen fellow?
Well, Ben Jacobsen is a sophomore accounting major here at UNI, and I sat down with him to talk about the situation. When I asked Ben what his histo -
ry with basketball was, he said, “I played basketball when I was in the sixth grade, and I was a complete stud, but I have never touched a basketball since. I honestly kind of hate the sport.” Ben sounded pretty uninterested when he answered that question, but when I asked what he was going to do about the contract, his whole mood changed, “I obviously do not like basketball, but that is a free four million dollars just sitting there for me. I would be a complete idiot not to sign that contract.” I finally asked him if he could handle all of the time and effort that it took to be a college basketball coach. He responded by saying, “Obviously, I am not qualified in any way, and have nothing to bring to the table, but I can easily just pretend and sit around and collect a paycheck.”
Ben wasted no time, and a day after Coach Jacobson was supposed to sign his
extension, Ben Jacobsen was the one becoming the coach of the Panthers for the next four years. After he officially became the new coach of the Panthers, I got a chance to briefly ask Coach Jacobson what he thought of the situation. He said, “Obviously I am disappointed at this mistake that was made, and wish that I could continue to be the coach. However, I can certainly not blame the young man for wanting a bag, I would have done the same thing if I was in his shoes. I guess the next thing for me is to enjoy my retirement, I had a good long career.”
It is certainly sad to see Coach Jacobson go, but we will hope for the best with new coach Ben Jacobsen. Things should certainly begin to get interesting with him at the helm, and we will get to find out what he can bring to the table next season.
New UNI men’s basketball Head Coach Ben Jacobsen hired his first assistant coach as he attempts to prepare for basketball season. It was an unusual hire, and seems to be the result of more paperwork errors and misunderstandings. The assistant Jacobsen hired was Brian Ferentz, the Iowa offensive coordinator for football, not basketball. Ferentz has spent his whole coaching career as a football coach.
In the press conference announcing the move, Jacobsen seemed positive about the move. “I hired Brian Ferentz because his resume talked extensively about his work with centers. He told me, ‘I have lots of experience teaching centers to block.’ I really want to have a great post defense this year, and teaching centers to block shots is going to be a key part.”
When a reporter explained that Ferentz was a football coach, and not a basketball coach, Jacobsen was taken aback. “Oh
no! I knew I would mess something up. I don’t even follow football. How was I supposed to know that they had centers in football too?”
Ferentz was equally shocked at the news that he had been hired as a basketball coach. “I spoke on the phone with Coach Jacobsen. He told me he was the new coach, and so I just assumed he was the new football coach. He really spoke my lingo. He said he wanted to have strong center play to win the war in the trenches. He wanted to build his team around defense, and that’s how I feel about it too.”
After the press conference, reporters went to talk to the Director of Athletics, David Harris. This was not the first mistake he’s made recently, as a bungled contract extension was what led to Coach Jacobsen getting the job instead of Ben Jacobson, who had been the head basketball coach for 17 seasons. Harris was defensive. “Look, the hire of Coach Jacobsen was a simple spelling mistake. It’s really easy to miss one letter. Now, I think he’s
going to do a great job. I didn’t want to butt in on his first hire. He was really excited about getting a coach to sign so quickly, and he assured me he had it all under control. We’ll just roll with it.”
Despite the mixup, the plan is to go forward with the hire. Firing Ferentz or reassigning him to the football team would require more paperwork and contracts, and we know how that goes. “Yeah, no more paperwork if I can help it. Who knows, I might accidentally fire myself,” Jacobsen joked.
The next day, Jacobsen had another press conference about the first practice with Brian Ferentz. “I actually think it went pretty well. Brian has taught the players to be more physical, and I think that could be good. I did have to call some offensive fouls and moving screens on our big men, but I think they’ll adjust with time.”
Ferentz agreed. “I mean, basketball and football are basically the same thing. I’m pretty sure I’ll only need a couple more practices to really get the hang
of it. I was a little confused when my guys opened up space for Bowen Born to go to the end zone and he pulled up for a three instead, but hey, I was used to only getting three points each trip at Iowa, too.”
here are still questions
about the fit and whether Jacobsen really has everything under control, but administrators are still giving him freedom to try out this job and see if he and Ferentz are the right fit for UNI’s men’s basketball program.
