North Shore Echo February 8, 2017

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Cupids, chocolates and courtly love

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February 8, 2017

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More than romance to be had this Valentine’s Day Valentine’s Day is more than just an excuse for a date night, it’s February 13, there are ample opportunities to spend some quality time an opportunity to show your loved ones just how much you care with the kids. Be sure to check out the 5th Annual Family Day Festival at through cards, presents and meaningful gestures. the Tournament Capital Centre. A myriad of activities awaits your active If you are single and over 35 and lacking a Valentine of your own, youngsters from the ages of 3 to 12. This family-themed festival runs from fear not! The Sandbar Grill is hosting Love Connections for Singles 10:00 am to 2:00 pm, and offers tea 35 and Over on February 9. A meet and mingle with potential suitors parties, theater, live music, in a fun, casual environment? What have you got sports, and arts and crafts to lose? Worse case scenario, you’ll get to from the likes of 4Cats check out the latest restaurant in North Art Studio, Kamloops Kamloops. Speaking of Sandbar, Minor Baseball, they’ll be offering a Valentine’s Lil Monkey’s dinner special, so if you meet Treehouse Indoor the love of your life at Love Playground, Connections, maybe bring K a m l o o p s RSOE - fr ear jan 25 2012.indd 1 them back to where the Community magic happened. Call 236Kitchens, Western 421-2270 to reserve a spot.

Karate Academy, and Looking to put the River City Gymnastics. ‘fun’ in fundraiser? The Donations to the Kamloops Food Bank will Kamloops Fraternity of Eagles is hosting a be collected, which is a wonValentine’s Day Dance on derful way to show those less February 11. Get your groove fortunate some love. on with Michelle Simpson and If you want to really make a splash her band. Tickets are $15 and with the family for Valentine’s day, proceeds support The Heart and Bubble Guppies Live! Ready to Rock is Stroke Foundation. Check out the not to be missed! Bubble Guppies are Kamloops FOE 3453 Facebook page merchildren from the popular carfor more details. toon on Nickelodeon that teaches Sweetheart sM Valentine’s can be a lonely time for senior’s pre-school children school-readiare lookin arlin and Doris g citizens and it needn’t be. The Centre for Seniors ness skills through song and dance.

Valentine’s forward to Da Information will be hosting a darling little lunch This performance promises plenty of Brock Acti y at the vity at their Brock Shopping Centre location on February audience interaction through singing and Centre.

14. Guests will enjoy finger sandwiches, desserts, coffee, dancing at the Sagebrush Theatre. For more specialty teas and some spirited conversation. Lunch is $5.00 information visit tickets.kamloopslive.com. and will be served from 1:00 to 3:00 pm. Amber Hum, Program Whether you’re single, a senior, have a sweetheart or small Coordinator, said: “We’re excited to host our first ever Valentine’s Day children, Kamloops is offering a wide variety of possibilities to Tea, and everyone is welcome.” connect, catch up, bond and express your love on Valentine’s Day. Who’s says that Valentines day is just for couples? With Family Day on Alicia Ashcroft, freelance

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North Shore echo

Walk for Peace A small group met last week to begin the planning for the Walk for Peace, Social Justice and the Environment. The date of the walk is Saturday, May 6 at Stewart Wood Elementary School/Farmers’ Market. Another meeting will be held at 2:00 pm on Saturday, February 25 at the Smorgasbord Deli, everyone is welcome. In the meantime, the planning committee invites you to complete their survey to give them your ideas for the walk. The survey is at fluidsurveys.com/ surveys/michael-3/the-walk-2017.

Need your voice

Vern Short of the Kamloops White Cane Club stopped by the Echo to share some exciting news. An official proclamation from Mayor Peter Milobar designates February 5th to the 11th to be White Cane Week. Vern is always out and about educating people on blindness and vision loss in our community.

The BCSPCA is asking for the public’s input to help make recommendations to the NFACC Code of Practice. Your comments can make a difference in the short lives of vulnerable calves. Go to http:// www.spca.bc.ca/news-and-events/ news/calves-need-your-help.html to add your comments to the survey before February 14.

MMBC partnership to generate $1.1 million per year In April 2017, the City of of hauling and sorting recy- able to put glass or soft plas- education campaign launch in Kamloops will join the grow- clable material, saving the City tic film (plastic shopping bags, the coming weeks to outline the ing list of BC communities par- an additional $800,000 per year. plastic wrap, etc.) into their new recycling do’s and don’ts. ticipating in the Multi-Material This may allow us to expand curbside bins. These products “Education will be a big part BC (MMBC) packaging and the curbside program to include will be accepted at the existing of this program,” says Farrow. printed paper recycling program organic waste collection in the MMBC depots: Lorne Street “We need the help of residents to – a partnership that will generate future.”

Bottle Depot and both locations properly sort recycling. Placing approximately $1.1 million in The MMBC program will of General Grants Recycling materials that don’t belong in revenue per year for the City. change what is accepted in the Centre. the curbside recycling bins can “We’ve been working with curbside recycling bins. Under “This small change will go a result in significant penalties to MMBC for three years to become MMBC, residents will now be long way for the City,” says the City.” a service provider for their pro- able to recycle items not cur- Mayor Peter Milobar. “We will These changes are expected to gram,” says Glen Farrow, Streets rently accepted curbside, such happily accept $1.1 million in come into effect in April 2017. and Environmental Services as empty aerosol cans, pizza exchange for taking glass and For more information on the Manager for the City. “In addi- boxes, and pet food bags. The plastic film out of the curbside MMBC packaging and printed tion to the increased revenue, most significant change will be program.” paper recycling program, visit MMBC will also cover the costs that residents will no longer be Residents can expect to see an RecyclingInBC.ca.

Waste survey seeks feedback and offers prizes The Thompson-Nicola Regional District one of two prizes — a $100 VISA card or pleted in 2008. The work done over the next is offering a survey to get feedback from a home composting kit. approximately 18 months will set the direcresidents about their current garbage and A link to the online survey can be found tion for the management of solid waste in recycling services, and what they’d like at tnrd.ca, and physical copies will be the TNRD for at least 10 years to come. to see in the future. The survey is part available at TNRD libraries, member The process will include extensive pubof the Regional Solid Waste Management municipalities’ offices, or at TNRD lic consultations and the continued input Plan (RSWMP) Review process that is waste sites. The survey closes February from three separate committees. The entire currently underway.

28 and the winners should be announced process will be guided by a qualified conThe survey, which is open to all resi- in mid-March. sultant, TNRD staff, and the Ministry of dents of the TNRD and its member municReviews of the TNRD’s Solid Waste Environment’s brand new “Guide to Solid ipalities, will close at the end of February Management Plan are done periodically Waste Management Planning.” and features the chance for anyone who with guidance from the provincial Ministry For more information about the RSWMP fills it out to be entered into a draw to win of Environment. The last review was com- Review, go to tnrd.ca.

North Shore echo

February 8, 2017 n 3

Fossil Fun

ECHO ASKS Opinions of the people who matter – you.

What are your plans for Family Day?

Julie Atkinson

Elisabeth Antulob

Walking my dogs, spending time with my sister & her kids.

Working.

K9 Designz

Photo: Gary Hunt

Don Bouffard recently shared his passion for geology at the Big Little Science Centre. He displayed fossils, gemstones and other cool rocks with a great crowd of people of all ages.

Open house on rural education School District No. 73 (Kamloops/ bc/ruraleducation. All feedback received Thompson) and the Ministry of Education will help government shape a final report on are hosting a community meeting on an integrated rural education strategy. The Thursday, February 9, to share ideas on strategy aims to find long-term solutions for rural education in BC. Interested parents and the unique challenges facing rural school discommunity members are invited to attend tricts and communities, including looking at and express their thoughts on rural educa- the important social, cultural, and economic tion and the importance of rural schools. roles that schools play in small communities.

This open house is part of a public engageParliamentary Secretary for Rural ment process to help develop a provincial Education Linda Larson and Ministry of rural education strategy by the summer of Education staff invites everyone to attend 2017. You are also invited to respond to the this event at the TRU Terrace Room, Ministry’s draft discussion paper on rural Campus Activity Centre, 900 McGill education engagement, at http://engage.gov. Road from 6:00 to 8:00 pm.

in celebration of

International WOMEN’S DAY MARCH 8, 2017

The Downtown and North Shore Echo will recognize outstanding women who have made significant contributions to their organizations, their professions or the community in an upcoming special section.

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Fri. Feb 10 Kelly Spencer Sat. Feb 11 UFC 208 (No Live Entertainer) Valentine Dinner 5-9pm • Reservations accepted

Tue. Feb 14 Lindsay May (Barside Events)

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Please include your Do you know an amazing woman contact information and in our community? A young lady the nominee's contact making a difference, business information with a woman or a gal behind the scenes high-resolution photo and biography that deservesJam celebrating? Send us (200 words max.) to Night your nomination with a photo and Live Entertainmentecho3@shawcable.com 8-11pm • No Cover Wednesdays biography by February 22, 2017. or drop off at Band 8-11 pm with Fri. Feb 17 Angie Heinze Self-nominations are welcome. #1 - 219 Victoria Street.

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Sat. Feb 18 Lindsay May

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4 n February 8, 2017

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No one typically likes going to the doctor but if you visit Dr. Mavis Hollman’s office it is always decked out for the occasion. With Valentine’s Day coming up its everything pink and red, hearts everywhere and we mean everywhere! What a gift to her waiting patients especially kids.

Kamloops professional receives international acclaim Local professional Colin O’Leary, Principal of O’Leary and Associates, was recently selected as a winner in the economic development profession’s 40 Under 40 awards, the only award of its kind recognizing young talent in the economic development profession. Awarded in Jacksonville, Florida the winners are chosen based on their exceptional contributions to the economic development industry. The awards program is managed by Development Counsellors International (DCI), a New Yorkbased firm that specializes in economic development marketing.

Colin was chosen from candidates from as far away as Zürich, professionals to ever be recognized.

Switzerland, to be one of the top “I’m incredibly happy, to say 40 honoured at the International the least,” said Colin O’Leary in Economic Development Council’s Jacksonville, Florida where he was annual Leadership Summit. The recognized by the International Top 40 Under 40 Rising Stars are Economic Development Council named every two years, and Colin (IEDC) at the IEDC Leadership is one of only a handful of Canadian Summit. “Economic Development

is a part of my DNA and I really enjoy the work I do with our clients to help them thrive in business.

To be recognized for the work I do is such an honour.”

O’Leary and Associates is a British Columbia-based management consulting firm, helping businesses, social enterprises, nonprofits and public entities with their financial, innovation and strategic management needs.

DCI’s 40 Under 40 award was designed to discover the economic development profession’s rising stars. DCI officially announced the winners on January 31st at an awards ceremony during the International Economic Development Council Leadership Summit in Jacksonville and will feature an in-depth profile of each on its website in 2017.

For more information on DCI’s 40 Under 40 winners, visit www. aboutdci.com/40under40.

Ground source and air source heat pumps information workshop You are invited to an informative session on how heating and cooling your home with a heat pump might reduce your costs and fossil fuel emissions. Rob Purdy, volunteer steering committee member with the BC Sustainable Energy Association (BCSEA), will start off the evening with a presentation and short videos, and a panel of experts will be there to answer your questions.

The workshop will be on Wednesday, February 15 from 7:00 to 9:00 pm at Thompson Rivers University, Arts and Education Building Room Number 108 (AE108). The

presentation is open to all members of the public, there is no charge and registration is not required to attend.

You will leave this workshop with information on how to lower your carbon footprint and save money. Also there will be discussion on the importance of home draft proofing and insulation when considering heat pumps.

If you have questions about the public presentation or if you would like more information, email Rob Purdy, BCSEA Kamloops Chapter volunteer at rspurd@gmail.com.

North Shore echo

February 8, 2017 n 5

Cupids, chocolates and courtly love Valentine’s Day—the holiday—gets its first After the cold, barren wasteland that was January, it’s time to rev your engines up for the cin- shout out in literature from Chaucer in 1382. The namon heart spice, red hot month of love. Well, medieval era was digging on the concept of courtly love. It was repressed romance at it’s first there’s a groundhog...who decides finest. Knights would present roses to whether we’ll have to deal with a longer maidens, and praise them abundantly, winter. In the meantime, warm up on the perform chivalrous deeds and celebrate roaring flames of romantic love. Even their beauty from afar in the forms of if you don’t have a partner or even a poetry and song. crush, that’s okay. Gather some friends In 1537, England’s King Henry VII for a potluck dinner, treat your mother wielded his royal weight and locked to some chocolate. Valentine’s does not down February 14 as the official holihave to be specifically about lovers. You day now known as St. Valentine’s Day. can say I love you, I like you, or even PERFECTLY FABULOUS Where is the genesis of all that ‘sweets I appreciate you—it’s Valentine’s, anyAlicia Ashcroft for my sweet’ business? Not only was thing goes! it thought of as an aphrodisiac, physiWho makes up the rules anyway?

Hallmark card company, Cupid and the ghost cians of the 1800’s commonly recommended that of Richard Cadbury, the dude who invented the patients eat chocolate to calm their pining for lost love. Wow, what kind of medical plan did they chocolate box, that’s who.

Speaking of Cupid, who gave a flying baby a have back then? Imagine lining up at the walk-in bow and arrow anyway? That’s dangerous and ir- clinic at 7 am to catch five minutes with a doctor responsible, and I’d be thinking of anything but half a day later, to shrug mournfully, “I’m pretty romance if I got shot by one of Cupid’s arrows, sure I’m pining for lost love…will probably need I’ll tell you what. And why is the god of desire, some medical grade chocolate...you know, the erotic love, attraction, and affection a baby? Why good stuff”.

Victorians were all jacked up on a courtly love can’t Cupid look like Channing Tatum or The Rock? I’d take an arrow from Magic Mike or revival and lavished one another with love tokens.

Meanwhile, the Cadbury family was in there like Dwayne Johnson any day of the week.

V-day goes back a long way; scholars maintain swimwear, creating chocolatey goodies in heartthat it was Claudius II who got the ball rolling. shaped boxes (which were meant to store love letMotivations weren’t terribly romantic; ole Claudi- ters and locks of hair once the sweets were long us just didn’t want Roman men to get married dur- gone. Cute or creepy? Not sure). Nowadays, over ing wartime, as it made them less available or in- 35 million boxes of chocolate are purchased yearly; studies have proven that the procurement is a terested in military action.

Bishop Valentine, the little dickens, defied half-assed, last minute afterthought. That last part Claudius’ rule and performed secret wedding was a joke until I discovered the startling statisceremonies. For this, Valentine was jailed and tics—over 50% of all V-day cards are purchased executed. While imprisoned, he wrote a note to six days before the holiday. Apparently, 64% of the jailor’s daughter signing it “from your Valen- American men do not make plans for Valentine’s tine”—who allegedly responded with “say it with romance. That courtly love is looking pretty good now eh, ladies? diamonds, or don’t say it at all.”

However you celebrate Valentine’s day, be emRumor has it that Valentine’s day also is rooted in the ancient Roman fertility festival of Lupercalia, powered by the knowledge that it is a holiday in which there was a lottery of women’s names. hodgepodge from centuries of ancient rituals, To mark this occasion, young men would draw witchcraft, literature, martyrs, myth, royal denames, and that lucky lady remained his sexual crees, and chocolatiers. My sincerest hope that companion for an entire year. Sounds like a real you are courted, wooed, celebrated, lavished by hoot. Frankly, I reckon they would have preferred someone who loves you, and that that love lingers well beyond mid-February. some long-stemmed roses instead.

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On Family Day, the City of Kamloops will transform the Tournament Capital Centre (TCC) at 910 McGill Road into a festival for families with children of all ages. The 5th Annual Family Day Festival will take place on Monday, February 13, from 10 am to 2 pm, and the event is free.

There will also be a free swim at the TCC from 1 pm to 4 pm.

Festival goers will have an opportunity to join a princess tea party, get creative with arts and crafts, have their faces painted, experience live performances, learn about all things science, practice karate, and try new sports. With close to 50 booths and activities, there will be something for everyone.

There will be opportunities to win great prizes. Families can pick up “experience passports” at the door and all completed passports will be entered in a draw to win an Annual Family Pass to the Wildlife Park.

In addition, the City of Kamloops booth will have a draw to win a six month full facility pass to the TCC and there will be a chance to win more prizes including Wildlife Park passes, family memberships to the Kamloops Art Gallery, skate passes, swim passes, and City of Kamloops swag. If that wasn’t enough, in celebration of Canada’s 150th birthday, the 150th person to walk through the door at the TCC will win some great Canada 150 merchandise!

The Kamloops Food Bank will be accepting donations for nonperishable food items at the door.

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North Shore echo

Special Olympians gearing up for Summer Games in July Special Olympics British tition before and were able to Columbia (SOBC) allows ath- experience playing under presletes with intellectual disabilities sure in a competitive atmosphere. participate in numerous sports on The Wildcats had three games to a local, Provincial and National play in total against teams of varylevel. Here in Kamloops we ing abilities. They got on the scorehave athletes training in pow- board every game and the team erlifting, floor hockey, curling, grew stronger with each game. swimming, bowling and gymThe team was cheered on nastics throughout the winter. throughout the competition by On Sunday, January 28 the many parents, and one of their Wildcats headed to Kelowna for stars players was in the crowd the 1st Annual Okanagan Winter to show her support – Tyrine Classic Basketball Tournament. Flukinger will be competing in This tournament is put on by the Special Olympics British Columbia for those athletes with intellectual disabilities. The goal of this tournament is to celebrate the growth of basketball in our region and provide a fun competition opportunity presenting an experience that can be a positive one for all teams and athletes.

Coaches Leah Flor, John Chow and Jordynn Denness had been working with the athletes developing their skills and teamwork. The coaches chose Alyssa Brown, Shinji Matthews, Braden Joseph Monte, Nathan Venasse, Brad Smith, Joshua Trudell, Andrew Watkins, Kristin White and Steven Joseph to play for the Wildcats for the tournament.

These athletes have not had the opportunity to play in compe-

the Special Olympics Summer Games here in Kamloops in July. She will be one of the players representing Kamloops in the Provincial competition.

Also, for the first time ever athletes from SOBC Kamloops took part in the SOBC Powerlifting competition in Vernon on February 5. The competition saw athletes from Kamloops, Vernon, Kelowna and Penticton compete together and prepare for the upcoming Summer Games

in July. There will be three lifts – squat, bench press and deadlift, each athlete will have three attempts at the lift.

Ryan Kealey, Kent Pletti and Joel Jensen have been training with Jordan Sernaggia for eight months, focusing on technique and form and were eager to show what they are capable of in the competition.

If you would like more information on Special Olympics, or to get involved, email sobckamloops@ gmail.com.

21st Annual Kamloops Film Festival bigger than ever This year’s Kamloops Film Festival (KFF) is bigger than ever with 22 movies over 10 days. Running March 2 to 11 this will be the most film offerings in their history! But more importantly, the focus for the 21st Annual KFF, once again taking place at the Paramount Theatre, is to make it better than ever before! In 2016 they celebrated a milestone with their twentieth anniversary. Not wanting to rest on their laurels as they move into a new decade of festivaling... or festivalization... or festivalness... They want to make your experience the best it can be. So this year they are looking at what they do and striving to do

it even better. This includes higher level Canadian and International films (seven are Oscar nominated), events that engage even further, more special guest content, and parties that promise to put the ‘hoot’ in hootenanny. There is an incredible lineup of films for this festival.

Due to popular demand, KFF Passes are back. They are available online now along with single tickets. Plus new this year there is children’s pricing. And you can even pick up your passes early... excited yet? See their website for more information and tickets at www.kamloopsfilmfest.ca

funny pa g e s NORTH SHORE

February 8, 2017

warning! This publication is not suitable, and not intended, for children and those with a weak sense of humour. If you meet these requirements, stop reading immediately and secure your parents permission. In fact stop and call your parents anyway. Thank them for bringing you into the world. Thank them for raising you. How long has it been since you told Mom you loved her? Too long, I bet. Go ahead, call her now.

I ALMOST HAD A PSYCHIC GIRLFRIEND… BUT SHE DUMPED ME BEFORE WE MET

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The language of love

how to not be a trailblazer

How to say ‘I love You’ in different languages: Albanian........Une Te Dua Arabic..........Ana Bhibbik Catalan.........Testimo Molt Chinese.........Wo Ai Ni Eskimo..........Nagligivaget French..........Je T’aime German..........Ich Liebe Dich Greek...........S’Agapo Hawaiian........Aloha Wau la Oe Hebrew..........Ani Ohev Otakh Hungarian.......Se Ret Lay Italian.........Ti Amo

KEEP THE DREAM ALIVE… HIT THE SNOOZE BUTTON!

Drumming up business BROCK CENTRE A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing LIQUOR STORE at the counter methodically placing “Love”

1800 TRANQUILLE RD BROCK SHOPPING CENTRE stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts 250.554.3317 brockcentreliquorstore.com all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them.

His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes up to the balding man and asks him what he is doing. The man says, “I’m sending out one thousand Valentine cards signed, ‘Guess who?’”

“But why?” asks the man.

“I’m a divorce lawyer,” the man replies.

Please remember to clear your sidewalks. Our carriers, the eldery and mobility challenged appreciate it!

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North Shore echo

funny pages kiss my grits

Welcome Home The North Shore of Kamloops is a vibrant community.

Whether you grew up here, work here, or play here; people love it here. We are the North Shore.

Frog at the bank

,,

‘‘

Enjoy authentic Pho Viet and delicious donuts, as well as, steamed hotdogs!

– Donut King & Pebblez Ice Cream owner Joe Doyle (with daughter Zaria) returned to Kamloops in May 2015 after living in Vancouver for 18 years. 451 Tranquille Road.

A frog is outgrowing his lily pad and decides to make some home improvements. He doesn’t have the money, so he hops to the bank to borrow some.

At the bank, he takes a seat at loan officer Patricia Black’s desk and explains his dilemma.

“I want to upgrade my lily pad, maybe add another window, but I don’t have the cash. Can you lend me the money?”

“Maybe. What can you offer as collateral?”

“Well,” says the frog. “All I have is this paperweight. You

shake it up, and it snows on the little village. Cute, huh?”

“Hmm . . . I’ll have to speak to my manager.” She enters her manager’s office.

“Mr. Bitterby, I’ve got a frog at my desk who wants to borrow money for lily pad improvements. But all he can offer for collateral is this glass paperweight.”

Mr. Bitterby takes the paperweight, hefts it in his hand, looks at her and says, “It’s a knickknack, Patty Black, give the frog a loan.”

Notable Quotable B U S I N E S S A S S O C I AT I O N

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“Let’s all take a moment of silence this Valentine’s Day to think about the couples who started dating end of January.”

North Shore echo

STEP TWO: A Valentine card is an acceptable nonverbal token of appreciation. Best of all, it’s cheap. Good Valentines are pink with lots of lace and have cute words such as “I’ll love my sugar bunny forever and ever and ever and ... “ Bad Valentine cards say, “Good for one free quart of motor oil.”

S T E P T H R E E : Candy. For some scientific reason that makes no sense, women regard chocolate the same way men view beer. While a handful of M&Ms is OK, women tend to expect something a bit nicer.

Wrapped for starters. By the way, since the candy is supposed to be for her, she’s going to notice any test bites. Stay out of it.

STEP FOUR: Jewelry. A bit pricier, especially if you didn’t bother with steps 1-3. If you did, you might get by with a small but hideously expensive ring, necklace, or tiara. Keep in mind that most women, even in Utah, do not consider aluminum, tin or a Mylar balloon to be a precious metal.

STEP FIVE: Lingerie. Be careful.

Few men are smart enough about women to figure out their underwear. Not only does it have to be the right size and caliber, it must also match any of the approximately 8 billion feelings she currently has about herself. To be safe, tell the clerk that you’re looking for something that can’t be used to strangle you in your sleep.

STEP SIX: Romantic getaways are good for couples with more than 0.002 kids. Studies prove that not even bacteria can reproduce when a toddler is beating on the bedroom door with a FisherPrice toy. Depending on the size of your family, the romantic getaway may have to cross at least three international boundaries.

STEP SEVEN: Unlike men, women give points for trying. So do something. Anything is better than nothing. If you don’t believe me, I can show you last year’s knot on the back of my head.

Independent living with a sense of community!

A man’s guide to surviving Valentine’s Day If you are a man, chances are you have forgotten that Tuesday is Valentine’s Day. Now that you know, this seems a good time to pause for a large hysterical fit.

The angst you are feeling right now stems from a complete lack of understanding about what makes a woman feel romantic. I don’t know either, but I did look it up on the Internet.

Not counting about 5,000 Web sites that seem to correlate the word “romance” with “hot mamas,” here’s what I found out.

HOW TO ROMANCE A WOMAN: Call her. Hug her.

Compliment her. Smile at her.

Laugh with her. Cry with her.

Cuddle with her. Shop with her.

Give her jewelry and flowers.

Hold her hand. Write love letters to her. Go to the end of the Earth and back again for her.

Conversely, if a woman wants to romance a man, she would only need to show up wearing anything remotely revealing, including a hazardous-material suit.

This may sound like an oversimplification of gender romance differences, but it isn’t far from reality. It’s always Valentine’s Day for men, if you get my drift.

Women need a special day.

Because it involves a woman’s feelings, Valentine’s Day is something of a mystery to men.

So is the top of a box of Cheeze Doodles, but we’ll save that for another column.

The following is a basic guide to Valentine’s Day survival for men, which was faxed to me by the nice ladies down at “Romance Anonymous,” formerly known as “Men Are Pigs But We Can’t Kill Them.”

STEP ONE: The minimum requirement is to let the woman know that you care. The least expensive way is to look at her -- preferably somewhere on her face -- and say, “I love you, [her name here].” If you forget her name, don’t bother with the rest of the steps. You’re dead.

February 8, 2017 n 9

funny pages

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10 n February 8, 2017

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Plenty to do leading up to Valentine’s Day ■■ White Cane Week Luncheon at Desert Gardens on Feb. 9 at 12 noon with Keynote speaker RT Rev. Mr. Ken Gray, current Chairperson of CNIB BC/Yukon Division Board.

Limited tickets available at CNIB office or through Laura at 250-372-5604 until Feb. 2. No tickets at the door.

■■ Social Ballroom Dancing for terrified beginners to experienced dancers in the Dogwood Room, Cottonwood Manor, 730 Cottonwood Ave. on Thursdays. Lesson at 6:30pm.

Feb 9, 16: foxtrot westchester, Feb. 23: foxtrot society. Dance 7 to 9pm. Drop-in fee. FMI contact Dance With Me Kamloops at 250-3773743 or dancewithmekamloops.com.

■■ Big Little Science Centre Feb. 11: Air Pressure Show.Exploration Room is open 10am to 4pm with over 140 different exhibits to enjoy. 655 Holt Street. FMI visit blscs.org.

■■ Chances - Live entertainment from 8 to 11pm. Fri, Feb. 10 - Kelly Spencer. Sat, Feb. 11 - UFC 208 (No Live Entertainer). Jam Night every Wed. with Jim Cochran and Crew from 8 to 11pm. 1250 Halston Ave. ■■ TVASC “Let’s Dance” on Feb. 11 from 8pm to 12am at Brock Activity Centre, 9A, 1800 Tranquille Rd. DJ Music by Jaccard Music Service. For tickets contact Francoise 778-220-8010, Norma 250-299-7221 or Zonia 250-372-0091. FMI call 250-571-5111.

■■ Valentines Dance (no dinner due to renovations) with Michelle Simpson Band, Feb. 11 at Fraternal Order of Eagles. 755 Tranquille Rd. Proceeds going to Heart and Stroke. Ticket price reduced. Call 250-376-4633 .

■■ Kamloops Kidney Support Group next meeting is Sat, Feb. 11, 10 am at Romeo’s Kitchen, 1250 Rogers Way. Chat and share experiences, whether you may be pre-dialysis or on dialysis, a kidney donor or a recipient, or anything in between. FMI, call Edna Humphreys at 250-376-6361, Dorothy Drinnan at 250-5732988, or Margaret Thompson at 250-819-3135.

■■ Community Dinner at North Shore Community Centre on Sun. Feb. 12. Roast chicken dinner by Harold’s Restaurant. Entertainment

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by The Posse. Tickets must be purchased in advance at the front desk.

■■ Excelsior Rebekah Lodge #23 events: Feb. 14: Valentines Party at 7:30 pm. General Meeting on Feb. 28 at 7:30 pm, 423 Tranquille Rd. ■■ Freudian Slips Improv “Dungeons & Dragons (Mission Improvable)” on Feb. 18 at the Stage House Theatre, 422 Tranquille Rd. Doors at 7:30pm show at 8pm. Tickets at the door. FMI visit www.chimeratheatre.com ■■ Used Book and Craft Supplies Sale at North Shore Community Centre, Tues, Feb 21 to Fri, Feb 24 from 9 am - 4 pm.

■■ Monthly Friday Dinners at the Ukranian Orthodox Church, 5 to 7 pm, 1044 8th St. Feb. 24, Mar. 31, Apr. 28, May 26.

FMI call 250-578-8266 or 250-376-1978.

■■ Mamma Mia Party fundraiser for BCSPCA new shelter, Feb. 24 at 6:30pm The Coast Hotel Conference Centre. Tickets available at Kamoopslive.ca, 250-374-LIVE or by contacting Judy Basso at 250-851-5247.

■■ Western Canadian Indoor Championship Series RC Racing at Tournament Capital Centre indoor basketball courts Mar. 3 to Ambassador of Love is no joke - For 5. Hosted by the Thompson Valley RC Race 17 years now Uncle Chris the Clown has been Club. Admission for spectators is free. 9am to bringing out his alter-ego “The Ambassador of 7pm on Sat. 9am to 3pm on Sun. FMI www.

Love” for Valentine’s Day and donating half of thompsonvalleyrc.com or www.wcics.ca what he raises to charity. This year he’ll be doing ■■ Annual Cabane á sucre (Sugar Shack just that and once again donating to Variety the Party) at Rainbow Roost, 6675 Westsyde Children’s Charity. So why not have Uncle Chris Rd on Sat, Mar 4 at 2pm. A fun filled do a Valentine’s delivery to your special someone? afternoon for the whole family hosted by Uncle Chris the Clown will show up to your The Francophone Association. Enjoy the Valentine’s work, school or home to deliver your uniqueness of maple taffy, live folk music Valentine greeting, a cute and cuddly stuffy, a with the Québec duo “FolkloFolie” and trabeautiful carnation from Kamloops Florists, and ditional supper. Limited tickets for supper. an original Uncle Chris the Clown balloon animal FMI call 250-376-6060. all for only $75 of which half will go to Variety the ■■ Kamloops Wood Carvers Club meets Children’s Charity! It’s a win-win situation for every Tues. at 6:30pm at North Shore commuall! Uncle Chris the Clown hopes to raise over nity Centre, 730 Cottonwood Ave, third Sat. of $750 this year by doing as many deliveries as the month from 10am to 1pm at KMS Tools those big clown feet will let him! For more information, visit www.unclechristheclown. and a dinner meeting on the first Tues. of each month. FMI contact LeRoy Scott at 250-554com or call 250-318-3976.

3552 or nonie.leroyscott@gmail.com.

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February 8, 2017 n 11

echo stargazer Dear Aquarius: (Jan. 21 - Feb. 19) Double watch your words!

A verbal outburst could spin things out of control faster than a sudden snow storm at rush hour. Love arrives to mend broken fences.

Dear Pisces: (Feb. 20 - Mar. 20) Both unexpected cheques and bills arrive to complicate and confuse a busy financial landscape.

Emotional impulses are calling for a romantic adventure so eventhough life feels like it’s all work, make time to play.

Dear Aries: (Mar. 21 - April 20) Love joins assertion in your astrosector of personal identity, attracting similar energy that you expend. Be mindful of where you place your efforts. Karma stops in to say hello.

Dear Taurus: (Apr. 21 - May 21) The hidden nature of life may not resonate favourably with the Taurus vibe of open peace and love but behind the scenes activities are taking place without your knowledge. Some of the energies will bless but others just stand in your way.

Dear Gemini: (May 22 - June 21) Higher learning and foreign affairs still dominate your daily focus but trouble is beginning to brew from a friendly source. Experience is your best friend so trust the lessons you’ve already learned.

Dear Cancer: (June 22 - July 22) Expect the unexpected while out in public. Sudden recognition arrives for both good and bad.

Dress your best because fans are watching.

Dear Leo: (July 23 - Aug 22) Watch your words! A causal statement of encouragement could get wildly out of hand, raining down a series of attacks from afar that is completely unexpected. Love wants to settle down.

Dear Virgo: (Aug. 23 - Sept. 23) Confusion returns as illusions are revealed in love. Logical emotions point to taking things to the next level but trust is required when money is put on the line. Trust your plan.

Dear Libra (Sept. 24 - Oct. 23) Events repeat themselves with outbursts of affection and promises of change. Don’t be fooled however by the inward desire of how perfect life could be if everyone just did their part. It’s time to cut losses and recast the lead roles.

Dear Scorpio: (Oct. 24 - Nov. 22) Bumps in your daily routine arrive when you have the least amount of time to deal with them.

Karma is testing your boundaries and checking in to see if you’ve learned your lessons. Be gentle but decisive action is required.

Dear Sagittarius: (Nov. 23 -Dec. 21) You’ve entered into a playful and romantic cycle but both children and playmates are kicking up a fuss. Don’t get dragged into the drama. Love wants you to get out and enjoy the day.

Dear Capricorn: (Dec. 22 - Jan. 20) Rainy days and business delays aren’t high on anyone’s list of favourite pastimes but a little forewarning helps you speed through the obstacles. If the office is causing fits then try working from home.

Astro-week Sonnyscopes courtesy of Collin Sonny Rosati, Vancouver Astrologer, Hypnotist. For personal readings visit thesunnyside.net.

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KINDERGARTEN REGISTRATION DATES

(Neighbourhood Schools) February 14 - 17, 2017 9:00 am to 12:00 pm and 1:00 pm to 3:00 pm Parents are strongly encouraged to register children for Kindergarten on these dates. *Please refer to School District No. 73 Policy 300.1 School Boundaries and Student Transfer Requests and Policy 706.2 Education Choice: Enrolment for clarification regarding school boundaries and enrolment in Schools of Choice. Information on the catchment areas is available on our website: www.sd73.bc.ca

12 n February 8, 2017

North Shore echo

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