teens [13–18 years]

you never told me I couldn’t do that...” “That’s completely unfair; you can’t ground me for doing that!” “Hello...taking away my car would end my world.”

Do any of these remarks sound familiar? Maybe we need to add an eye roll, scowl or deep sigh to make if more authentic, but comments and complaints like these are commonly heard in homes that fail to implement a consistent and structured discipline regimen. Research has shown parents who utilize behavior contracts, rarely deal with taunting teens because the rules and guidelines have already been established.

Boundary Basics And Gritty Guidelines

Think of any contract you have ever been a part of. From an employment agreement to a house mortgage, don’t you feel better knowing everything is right there in black and white? With everything on paper and clearly stated, behavior contracts can offer a simple and effective solution for many parenting dilemmas. Teens are aware of the expectations set for their behavior and what the consequences are when those expectations aren’t met. However, for contracts to be effective the following commitments must be made:

• parent and teen must be fair and realistic

• contracts should be specific and detailed leaving no questions or wiggle room

• commitment to enforcement is key, if not the contract is not worth the paper it is written on

• allow consideration for good behavior and not just misbehavior [rewards for success and consequences for failure]

If you are interested in a low-cost, pre-written behavior contract that covers a variety of different topics and issues, here are a few resources for you to checkout: www.teenbehaviorcontracts.com [ behavior contracts covering teen issues and more] www.parentcoachplan.com [offers an in-home discipline program that includes a set of behavior contracts which can be downloaded] www.behavior-contracts.com [offers a variety of behavior contracts and other parenting tools that can be downloaded, plus an online “Create a Behavior Contract” system]

Contracts for teens will help bring structure, consistency and fairness to your parenting practices. With these elements in place, you’re certain to establish a more successful and harmonious relationship with your teen and your home might just be a bit more peaceful too.