SEBS Online - Volume I

S O C I E T Y

SUMMER 2017

O F

E X - B U D H A N I L K A N T H A

VOLUME 25

S T U D E N T S

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MESSAGES

Greetings from the President of

SEBS-North America Greetings Fellow SEBSers and Well-Wishers!

Budhanilkantha School (“BNKS”) has completed 25 years of coeducation and we are dedicating this newsletter to all the female students and alumni of our beloved BNKS. Back in the Spring of 1991, 8 brave girls (young women) joined BNKS 300B class to do their O-Levels. This was a momentous occasion for the school, students, teachers, and its staff, opening the doors for the school to the other half of the country. BNKS finally became a Co-Educational institution after approximately 20 years of opening its doors. We all must applaud the first batch of girls for their courage to join a school with 600+ boys. I wonder what went through their minds as they made their long bus rides from all over the valley to Budhanilkantha every day! It was indeed a challenging environment for the first few batches of girls.

A few more girls joined BNKS 400B class in 1992 as day scholars.

The school formally became a co-ed “residential” school in 1993 with the construction of Hiunchuli House, taking in more female students in O-Level, grades 4, 5, 7 and 8. Currently, the school has approximately 40% female students and five girls’ hostels (one more is under construction). Recently, SEBS was led by 136C Sneedha Mainali as President in Nepal and the involvement of female alumni is growing every day.

SEBSers, both girls and boys, have grown in number and stature throughout the globe. We have immense level of love and respect for our alma mater and our members. Let’s all strive to help our members, continue to support Budhanilkantha School in any way we can, and set an example of how to do things better together under one SEBS umbrella.

Krishna Chhetri (503B) President of SEBS-North America San Francisco, California

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MESSAGES

Message from the BNKS Principal’s desk

Mr. Keshar Khulal According to Nelson Mandela, Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world. For Gazala Bhoje, an individual receives the knowledge of science, mathematics, geography, history, and so on through formal education, but he acquires understanding about the deeper things in life, the complex human relations, and the cause and effect relationship and so on through informal education.

Budhanilkantha School was established with the objective of imparting quality education to Nepalese children coming from every walks of life so that they would help reduce discriminations of all kinds that existed in our society. In its initial years, the school championed its mission in every respect but it failed to do justice to half the country’s population that had remained suppressed since the beginning of history. Gender discrimination is as deep rooted as cast and class discriminations. Furthermore, a residential school has the responsibility of providing the formal as well as informal education to its students.

While Budhanilkantha School championed in the formal part right from the beginning, it failed seriously in the informal part due to absence of girls, an integral part of human society. It did not provide environment for the boys to learn the skill of living harmoniously with the opposite gender, the essence of society. Thus, the school was producing technically skillful but socially incongruous manpower.

The management was aware and uncomfortable about this deficiency. However, in early 1970s, no parent would have been ready to send daughters to Co-Ed residential school because Co-Ed residential schools were not common even in the developed countries, let alone Nepal where girls in the villages did not even get to go to school. Plans were made, time and again, to set up a parallel school for girls but it never materialized. Establishing a school of such grandeur was a daunting task. Thanks to the rapid changes in the country, BNKS dared to turn Co-Ed in 1991, and probably became the first fully residential Co-Ed school in the country. People

were naturally skeptical about this quantum leap.

But, thanks to the committed management team, dedicated teachers and staff, and the daring girls of the first few batches, the risk was converted to boon for the school within a few years. Today, it is hard to believe that BNKS was once a boys only school!

Introduction of girls at BNKS has helped eliminate most of the antisocial practices that were prevalent at the school prior to it and promoted a socially healthy environment. Over 1,000 girls have already graduated from BNKS in the last 25 years and over 420 girls, making it 40% of the total student population, are currently studying in the school. Although the growth rate of girls’ population has been rather slow due to the fact that the school has been adding girls without curtailing boys’ population at the school, it was a matter of pride to have the First Lady President of Nepal, Rt. Honorable Bidya Devi Bhandary, inaugurate the fifth house for girls on School Day, exactly 25 years after the inauguration of the first girls’ house by Late Princess Diana. Construction of the sixth house is in progress and the much needed Multipurpose Hall is also in the pipeline.

The management is committed not to stop until the school is truly equally represented.

My salute to everyone who were involved in making that historic decision in 1991, the best decision in the history of BNKS! Budhanilkantha School is grateful to everyone who contributed directly and indirectly in the last 25 years in facilitating the growth of girls’ population, and it looks forward to some more support in the days ahead because the task ahead is even more daunting.

Long live BNKS, long live Co-Ed at BNKS. Mr Keshar Khulal (804A) Principal Budhanilkantha School

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25 YEARS OF CO-ED IN BNKS

COVER STORY

25 Years of co-ed in BNKS As we celebrate 25 years of advent of co-ed in BNKS, we reached out to people who were instrumental in affecting this change- teachers and administrators, and of course, the students themselves.

What follows below are their experiences- some of the teachers and administrators and girls from the first batch reminisce the early days of making the change, while a few others share their experiences some time after this monumental change had occurred.

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25 YEARS OF CO-ED IN BNKS

01/ Making the change How were you involved in making the decision, and/or implementation of the decision, to go from all-boys to co-ed school?

Brian Garton: When I arrived in Kathmandu I found there were a number of considerations that I felt should be addressed. Primary among them was the feeling, expressed by some of the senior staff of the British Overseas Development Administration (who had formal responsibility for the school) and by many of the senior staff of the various international Aid Agencies then working in Kathmandu, that the school’s alleged elitism would only benefit a very small number of “fortunate” Nepalese and would not contribute to the overall development of education and of Nepal generally. In particular, they objected to the fact that Nepalese girls could not take advantage of the education it offered. This last objection was quickly overcome as the Board had no problem with moving Budhanilkantha to becoming a truly co-educational school, and this development was certainly one of the proudest memories of my time there.

BRIAN GARTON Mr. Garton was the Principal of BNKS from January 1989 to July 1992; school turned Co-Ed during his tenure as the Principal.

JANA THAPA Mrs. Thapa was a longtime English teacher at BNKS and later a VicePrincipal. She was also the pastoral team head of the girl students and therefore was instrumental in making their integration into BNKS a smooth one.

Jana Thapa: Budhanilkantha it seemed had everything- beautiful buildings, highly qualified and dedicated teachers, state of the art laboratories, huge library, brightest students in the land-and I was proud to be teaching there.

Over the years the shine started to wear off as I realized what was missing - girl students. As a fairly independent minded woman I also started to question the notion that I was teaching in the national school of the country, a school with all its facilities, but a school that only catered for boys.

I was not the only person who started to question this; teachers, administrators at the school and at government level felt this was somewhat unfair. Since the school was funded to a large extent by the British Government, there were anxieties regarding this blatant discrimination even in the UK. I was surprised when one morning a group of girl students from a school in Kathmandu came and confronted the British headmaster and asked him point blank why they were being discriminated against (and the answer given was that they were hoping the British government would fund a similar school for girls!)

To cut a long story short, we were finally informed that girls were coming to Budhanilkantha, and

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I was designated to head the girl students.

Glen Tulip: Every year at BNKS was special for me, because of the teachers, the students and the setting. However, the advent of girls was a real milestone in my life as well. Having been given the great privilege of tutoring those 8 special ladies, I worked hard to help them become part of the BNKS family. I especially remember tutor meetings in my flat, teaching them different sports and games and of course, having real girls to cast in school plays!

AJ Wild: For the whole of 1991, eight enterprising young ladies made the daily journey by bus from their homes in Kathmandu to Budhanilkantha to study O-level and the school had turned co-educational. They were in Gaurishankar and I was their Housemaster.

What were some of the challenges in making this transition?

Brian Garton: It must have been very daunting for those very few girls in the first batch sharing the senior levels of what the school had to offer with more than 600 boys! But they more than met the challenge, and of course now the girls are a very significant element in the greatly expanded school today.

Jana Thapa: To start with, the school took in eight girls for the GCE O-Level program and these girls came in as day scholars. My admiration for these “pioneers” cannot be expressed. Their every move was watched by teachers and students and they could not put a foot out of place. I was designated to head the girl students and they, and to some extent I, had to put up with all kinds of comments from the male population of the school. The

comments ranged from hostile to malicious! Once another batch was taken in a year later, things got a lot better.

GLEN TULIP Ms. Tulip was an English teacher at BNKS, and one of the primary tutors for the girl students to ease their transition into BNKS.

AJ WILD Mr. Wild was a long-time Physics teacher at BNKS and the Housemaster of Gaurishankar House.

As such, he was the first Housemaster for the two early batches of girl students who joined to study O-Level.

SHOVANA CHHETRI Mrs. Chhetri is the long-serving Assistant to the School Principal.

Glen Tulip: It wasn’t all smooth sailing, for the boys or for the girls.

Many of the older boys had had very little contact with girls, apart from their own families, for a long time, and certainly not at school.

The younger boys were easier with them, as they were only a year or two out of co-education. The fact was, many of the boys didn’t know how to speak to the girls. In turn the girls were not sure how friendly they should be (as they told me) with the boys in their own batch and above. Also, they didn’t feel part of the school family because they weren’t boarders. However, things were worked out in time.

My regret was that I did not see them graduate, as I had left by then, but to my great joy, I’ve met with most of them over the years, as I’ve returned to Nepal twice since my time at BNKS, and they have all done very well, and remember their time at BNKS with gratitude and affection.

AJ Wild: When the first girls – (girls? – no – very definitely young ladies) – did join us, it was at a time when change was definitely in the air. There were no firmly established traditions to be broken down, no real prejudices to be overcome. Perhaps that made the transition a little bit easier than it would otherwise have been – easier than it was for English girls who, in similar circumstances, had to break through bastions of prejudice sometimes centuries thick to make a place for themselves in boys’ boarding schools. But still it couldn’t have been easy, and it is greatly to their credit that it went as well as it did.

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The transition made it easier than it was for English girls who, in similar circumstances, had to break through bastions of prejudice sometimes centuries thick to make a place for themselves in boys’ boarding schools.

What moments or experiences stand out about the transitioneither preparing for it or afterwards?

Jana Thapa: The first year, there were plenty of snide comments- one example that stands out was ribbing about the girls’ prowess on the playfield as they took part on Sports Day. To their credit the girls shouldered on even when the Class 4 boys shouted “Didis, we can do better.” But then we had the School Play and the girls came into their own. Romeo and Juliet with female actors made history.

It was finally in 1993 that girl students were taken in from Class 4 right up to Class 8 and of course at O-Level. Two hostels had been built solely to accommodate girls and we went on selection tests for the students. What really worried us was that with all the planning and hard work that had gone into place to admit girls into the school, we would not have many takers. But how wrong we were! At every

examination center even in far away rural areas like Humla and Jumla girls lined up to take the exams.

Shovana Chhetri: Budhanilkantha started admitting girls in 1991, five years after I joined. Seven girls of the first batch commuted to school from home in the school bus, which was also my means of transportation to work. The commute gave me an opportunity to get to know the girls. Although I was a little older than them, our acquaintance soon developed into friendship – I am still in touch with some of them all these years later. We would share stories, me about work and them about school – we never ran out of topics to share. I felt like I was a part of their life at BNKS. In fact for one of the cultural programs the girls had choreographed a dance number. Unfortunately, one of them could not make it to the performance. The team then asked me if I wanted to fill in for the dancer; I did and it was a great experience.

What were some of the things that you found changed as a result of this transition?

Jana Thapa: BNKS was alive with the sound of the girls. Although the number of girls admitted every year was only 15 compared to 90 boys, they seemed to be everywhere.

Slowly but surely they made their mark in every field. Also, boys started to appreciate the fact that the girls were there to stay and life for them became much easier.

We had hoped that with the advent of girls at Budhanilkantha, boys would be gentler and more at ease when dealing with girls but we also realized that girls became more confident and stronger.

Our boys and girls gained a lot from the co-educational experience. They learned to be confident in each other’s presence and at the same time appreciated the diversity in each other’s nature. The real result of the Budhanilkantha co-educational experience is that the boys and girls developed friendships that

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have lasted even after they left the school.

AJ Wild: So how did they change things? Well, perhaps not enormously in that first year, although 395B Samjhana’s performance as Anita in ‘Rumble on the West Side’ – a non-musical version of ‘West Side Story’ – did foreshadow things to come. There was, perhaps, a slightly higher degree of fragrance along the corridors of Gaurishankar but not much higher- Gaurishankar was in any case pretty civilized. In that year the young ladies were

feeling their way.

In the next year they were beginning to make their presence felt. A ‘ladies room’ sprang up beside the Science Laboratories, a ‘girls division’ made its appearance during Sports Day and, while not completely stealing the show (there were some excellent performances from boys as well), 395B Samjhana and 399B Reena as Juliet and the Nurse, respectively, lent to ‘Romeo and Juliet’ a depth that, without them, it would have lacked. Most significantly of all, in that year the entrance

tests for classes 4, 5, 7 and 8 were opened up to girls.

The following year saw co-education take a major step forward when Diana, Princess of Wales, ‘glided along a red carpet’ (as 484B Ritu put it) and opened Hiunchuli House.

What do you think of the decision 25 years later?

Brian Garton: Budhanilkantha School had a vision of high standards in education on a truly national and co-educational scale, and this continues today.

The School was also able to be successful in continuing to develop and extend the sense of truly national feeling.

I feel very proud to have played a part in this. Another positive outcome of this integration was the continuing development of SEBS as an extension of the original vision for the school.

Jana Thapa: At present, the one-time prestigious national school for boys has now become a successful coeducational institution where boys and girls get the same opportunities to study and take part in all the excellent co-curricular activities. Currently, there are around 1,100+ students at Budhanilkantha, out of which 400+ are girls. They are housed in the five hostels built specifically for them. I, of course, do wish that half the number of students there were girls but I am happy that so many of them are getting the opportunity. I am proud that the process started while I was still there.

AJ Wild: It was obviously quite crazy to give only half of humanity the opportunity

to make use of all the facilities and resources the school provided and get a head start in life. On page 16 of the 1993 edition of Bhanjyang there is a poem by 008 Sandesh*, then in Class 6; read it, if you can find a copy (or perhaps Sandesh will allow it to be printed.)

I think it’s a good poem but that is not the point. The point is, before Budhanilkantha became co-educational I think that a Class 6 boy would not, or perhaps could not, have written that poem. Afterwards he both could and did. That, for Budhanilkantha, was fundamental.

Shovana Chhetri: Traveling together with the students and listening to their stories made me wonder what it must be like getting education from a prestigious school that could open up doors to countless opportunities, and how life, especially for women in Nepal, could positively change through an opportunity of this nature. After sometime, I had my first child – a daughter. I decided then, I wanted her to go to Budhanilkantha, and sure enough, she did! She enjoyed and took advantage of every opportunity offered at the school and more.

The picture of Budhanilkantha is very different today. Starting with Hiunchuli the first ever girl’s hostel which was inaugurated by late Princess Diana, we have increased the number of girl’s hostel allowing us to admit more girls. We are yet to achieve a capacity that would permit us to provide equal slots for boys and girls, which happens to be a dream of mine for the school, it is a work in progress. I for one am glad Budhanilkantha School became co-educational when it did.

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02/ Living the change What were your thoughts/fears in planning to attend BNKS knowing you were going to be part of the select few that was going to make the school co-ed? Did any of the thoughts/fears materialize?

Samjhana Pandey-Hoyle: BNKS opening its doors to girls was a fantastic opportunity and I feel lucky to have been part of the first batch of girls. The difference in the style of teaching and the opportunities for extracurricular activities available to its students was without parallel at the time.

I may have been an academic achiever in my previous school but BNKS gave me the opportunity to grow in other areas as well, into a well-rounded individual.

Luna Rajbhandari: Before coming to BNKS, I was at St. Mary’s, an all-girls school. Naturally I was apprehensive about being just one of eight girls in a school of about 620 boys. Although I was excited about the opportunity, it was a very uncomfortable place to be for an awkward and introverted teenager. It certainly

helped that a couple of my closest friends from St. Mary’s, Jurika and Samjhana were also going with me. I especially remember Ms. Tulip, Mrs. Thapa and Mr. Wild supporting us through the chaotic first few weeks. The reactions from the boys at all levels ranged from friendliness and curiosity to outright hostility. I am sure it was quite an adjustment, both for the school administration and the students to have girls attend after remaining an all-boys school since inception.

Tisa Lacoul: At a very young age when I would go to meet my relative in BNKS, I used to wonder why we were denied the opportunity to attend this one of a kind school at that time.

All I can say is that the other gender had enjoyed this exclusive privilege for too long at the cost of our basic right to education in a national school. It was a decision that came very late but did come thankfully. And yes I remember being dismayed when I heard how many parents complained that girls had taken their sons’ place.

SAMJHANA PANDEY-HOYLE (395B) Samjhana did her BEng (Hons) in Electronics and Communications Engineering from Bristol University, England. She is currently working part time as a Software Manager leading a department of just over forty Software Engineers.

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How did you feel, as the first batch, trailblazing the change?

What were some of the challenges that you faced as the school adjusted to co-ed education environment? What were some of the life lessons learned?

Samjhana Pandey-Hoyle: Looking back, being the “trailblazers” was not as scary as anticipated because we had the support from the parents, the teachers, the peers, the seniors and the juniors (although at times we did feel the responsibility of doing the right thing and setting an example for the future girl students pressing down heavily on our shoulders).

Luna Rajbhandari: I lived in Khumaltar, the opposite end of the valley from BNKS. The girls’ hostel hadn’t been built. Taking the bus early in the morning and getting home late in the evening, especially after extra-curricular activities, was quite tough since I was one of the last students to be dropped off and first to be picked up. I definitely learned more in the first six months of my O’ levels than in the two years prior preparing for the SLC exams. The biggest lessons, however, were that of friendship and survival, of pushing myself beyond my comfort zone and growing in the process. Although I expected the BNKS experience to be an anomaly, in retrospect, it certainly prepared me well because female representation in technology is still a challenge in the west and I find myself as the only female in the room many times.

Tisa Lacoul: I guess greater challenges were faced by the boys already in school, especially ones who were closer to us, rather than us. For us, it was just normal going to school, well of course with some added attention. Life lesson I learnt I would say was

‘not everything that we take as normal is normal for everyone.’

LUNA RAJBHANDARI (397B) Luna graduated with a Bachelor’s degree in Electrical and Electronic Engineering from University of Leeds in the U.K. and an MBA from Northwestern University’s Kellogg School of Management.

She currently works as Director of Data Management and Platforms at Cars.com, a Chicago based digital company, and lives in Chicago with husband, Bishal and 13 year old daughter, Ayushi.

TISA LACOUL (394B) Tisa is married to a BNKS classmate Manindra and lives in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. They have a son and a daughter.

Sarina Adhikari: Budhanilkantha was quite an experience. I went there from a large co-ed school where everybody had their own small world and rest were oblivious. Being one of the few girls introduced in all boys school, we were the highlights.

It was almost like we were public figures. Everything we said and did was public, represented “the girls” and there was nothing private. One may think that sounds like the ultimate experience but it had its flaws.

There were obstacles no doubt but we survived with a close circle of friends, both boys and girls, who cared and supported each other. I cherish those memories. I feel it has made me into a strong individual and I am glad to have had the experience.

What were some of the more interesting moments/situations in BNKS? Luna Rajbhandari: • The beautiful campus and walking all over, up and down the hills.

• The wonderful support system we had in each other (the 8 girls) as we learnt to navigate the school environment in our first year, and things we got to do together- not the least of it was riding the staff school bus with other girls every day!

• Being generally terrible at sports and still having to participate because as one of 8 girls you were expected to, and of course being subjected to much derision. 2 years later feeling proud seeing a 4th grader bahini confidently hit a football in the field and hustle as part of a co-ed team. And, the badminton club we started with 10th grade boys and finally discovering a sport I could play.

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• Staying at Hiunchuli with a house full of girls in our final year as we prepared for the A level final. By 1993, there were girls at 4th and 7th grade as well.

25 years later, what are some of your thoughts when you recall attending BNKS? Tisa Lacoul: I just wish BNKS was a co-ed school right from the start.

Luna Rajbhandari: Back then BNKS was a school like no other (and it probably still is) in terms of opportunities and facilities it offered to students. When I first joined, I could not help noticing the privilege only the boys in Nepal had enjoyed until then. Attending BNKS certainly opened doors, and the experience was a big part of growing up for me.

It is great to know that BNKS today is officially a co-educational school with girls at all levels. It is equally satisfying to see women alumna leading the charge in many different fields. Although I have not visited BNKS since I left, I truly hope that there is much better integration and

SARINA ADHIKARI (390B) Sarina is a physician by profession and currently lives in San Diego, CA, with husband Suresh Sharma and two boys, Saujas and Siraj who are 16 and 8.

collaboration across the genders than what we experienced in the early years.

Sarina Adhikari: The school itself is a wonderful conglomerate of kids from all walks of lives. I am still amazed by all the resources put together for students from sports to culture with music and arts. It is a struggle to find all that in one school even here in the US.

One thing I really love above all about the school is this unique bonding everybody has.

Even now when I meet someone from the school there is an immediate intimacy. May be that’s the reason I am married to an ex- Budha as well. I guess we are the first married couple. Now, when I look back, a little smile spreads across my face and I am glad I was there.

Any advice you want to give to current girl students in BNKS? Samjhana Pandey-Hoyle: In a world where even the first world nations have gender and inclusion issues, what I have learned in my life is to make the most of opportunities life offers - BNKS was one such opportunity. I was a minority at BNKS, a minority at university and throughout my professional life. And yes, at times, I’ve had to work that much harder to prove that I am just as capable if not more as my male peers. But things are changing for the better, however slowly, around the world including in Nepal. We just need to keep the momentum going with support, not just from the women but also from the men in our lives (personal/social/professional).

Luna Rajbhandari: Don’t hold back, go beyond your comfort zone because that will lead to personal growth and new opportunities. BNKS will certainly prepare you well and set the foundations for leadership and lifelong learning. Build and nurture the friendships, because those will last a lifetime. Make the most of your experience there and have fun!

Tisa Lacoul: The world is yours to conquer! Believe in yourself and everything will fall into their places.

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25 YEARS OF CO-ED IN BNKS

The Center for Exclusion?

Kylie Minogue’s 1987 hit ‘Locomotion’ - that’s my lasting memory from Budhanilkantha school. There were eight of us – girls in a boy’s school - bound together by adversity and our gender; as friendship was cemented forever as we danced our way up and down the tarmac of the school. Locomotion was an escape from the ever-vigilant eyes, the voices that told us not to giggle for our 15-yearold selves were going to excite the boys from their dedication to their education.

My memories include running, my bladder full, trying to get to the only two toilets for girls in the 29 hectares wide campus. My six months or so in Budhanilkantha school prepared me to survive in a man’s world – where women must be twice as hardworking and twice as good to get the same amount of recognition as men.

I’d always envied the boys who got to study in Budhanilkantha school. Back in the 70s and early 80s, my mother taught there. Till I was eight, I grew up in one of the British styled houses inside the school compound with paved roads and green trees. It was thus early on that I realized that the boys at Budhanilkantha school were privileged. I knew the British and the Nepali government were supporting this school and I always wondered why it was not extended to girls.

SUBINA SHRESTHA (306B) Subina is a Kathmandubased filmmaker and correspondent who focuses on human rights, social issues and political changes in Nepal. She has told award-winning stories about the effects of natural and humanmade disasters; for her Nepal earthquake coverage, she received a special commendation from the Association of International Broadcasters, an Emmy nomination and other honors. Shrestha is the 2017 Atsuko Chiba Nieman Fellow at Harvard.

When it opened its doors to girls for O-Level in 1991, I applied.

The lack of toilets was just a symptom of how ill equipped the school was to handle

girls. It was much later that I came across a document - Foreign Aid and Foreign Policy: The Case of British Aid to Nepal, a damning critique on British Aid that made me realize that I was not wrong to resent both governments.

The paper by R. Andrew Nickson (1992, Development Administration Group; Papers in the Administration of Development no 48, The University of Birmingham) says that in fiscal year 90/91 9.4 percent of Nepal’s entire spending on secondary education went to Budhanlikantha school and that was only 16 percent of the school’s total budget of that year. 54 percent of the budget came from the British government. Only 30 percent came from fee paying students.

While the country’s spending in secondary education that year was 290 million rupees, the budget of Budhanilkantha school on that same year was 273 million rupees.

According to the document, successive British ‘ODA (British Aid) educational advisors made recommendations aimed at spreading the benefits from British aid to the school, but they have been rarely implemented.’ This included teacher trainings and inclusion of girls. In 1987, an ultimatum was given – British Aid to the school would be dependent on certain changes - one of which was admission of girls.

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My six months or so in Budhanilkantha school prepared me to survive in a man’s world – where women must be twice as hardworking and twice as good to get the same amount of recognition as men.

In 1990, when a senior advisor visited and saw that none of the recommendations had been implemented, he recommended that all ODA assistance to the school would be phased out by 1995. The continued support till 1995 was contingent upon the admission of girls.The very next year, unaware of the dynamics and the politics that got us to the school, the eight of us entered what used to be a hallowed ground for ‘exclusive education for boys’. So, it was not at all surprising that the school had not prepared for our arrival. We were given a dark room in one of the junior dorms along with one toilet. The other one was down the road, in the auditorium.

If there were more, I don’t remember.

Not everyone in the school was happy to have girls. There were many teachers and classmates who were supportive and I am extremely grateful to them but there were many who were resentful. Some were openly

critical about how girls would usurp the place reserved for boys For almost two decades, boys at Budhanilkantha had been raised to believe that they were special – the chosen ones - and our entrance challenged that view. We were told to modify our behavior so that the boys would not be distracted. Fifteen is a strange age to be in a patriarchal country and to find yourself in a situation where you are expected to be trailblazers and yet resented and censured was confusing.

You see, for years, I was made to believe that the school’s desire to be inclusive was out of a moral imperative and I had been proud of that. But I was foolish to think that social and political progress is a simple march towards greater openness.There is often an outside pressure and there is always an elite resistance and deep anxieties about what change may mean.

Budhanilkantha school proved to be a microcosm of the country’s political impulses.

Over the years, as a working

woman, I’ve learnt to train my bladder.

All around the country, I see women’s participation encouraged on paper and limited, sometime by the simple act of not providing them with toilets. A quarter of a century since I went to Budhanilkantha school, the ratio of boys to girls is still not half and half. Current girl students and recent graduates often tell me that they feel that they are treated differently than boys and how painful they found it. But I also see women adapt and fight back.

I’ve heard from other girls from Budhanilkantha school – friends and juniors who have done exceptionally well and have become women with integrity and resilience. And that makes me believe that despite what the original impetus was to make the school a coeducational school, it was one of the best decisions made and I hope the school makes it a moral imperative to give equal opportunities and equal treatment.

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25 YEARS OF CO-ED IN BNKS

03/Years later

LUNA RANJIT (564B) Luna co-founded Adhikaar, a women-led human rights and social justice organization. For more than a decade, Luna guided Adhikaar’s programs, research, policy advocacy, and partnerships, building visibility and power for the emerging Nepalispeaking immigrant and refugee community.

She has received numerous awards for her groundbreaking work. She holds an MPA degree from the Woodrow Wilson School, Princeton University and a bachelor’s degree from Grinnell College. She currently lives in New York.

Luna Ranjit: I have many fond memories of BNKS. The three years at the school challenged me and taught me to go beyond my comfort zone; it prepared me for the life beyond. And the best of all, I came out with lifelong friends and mentors.

I loved the attempt at egalitarianism at BNKS everyone went by their first name and a roll number and everything we used, from our clothing to bedding, were the same standard issue. For the first time in my life, I was able to cast aside the class and caste baggage and focus on my studies, extra-curriculars, and having fun with friends.

Although BNKS had gone co-ed for a few years, girls were not equally represented.

So there were few girls, and fewer still were interested in athletics. This lack of competition meant I went from being a middling athlete to a school record holder in running and jumping and all things athletic (it stoked my ego for sure!). I also got opportunities to dance and act and organize large scale events. And go on “chicken duties” with other school prefects!

But it was not all fun and games. Being in a co-ed school environment also meant

learning to deal with teenage boys regularly. And the boys were learning to interact with girls as well. It went from juvenile nicknames to the more annoying catcalls to the sexually explicit words I saw carved on a classroom bench.

Of course, much of it can be attributed to teenage angst on both ends, although the playing field was not balanced.

We girls became each other’s support system, and most of us managed the three years relatively unscathed. But even when there were more serious instances of sexual harassment, the school was not equipped to properly address it. The incident that stayed with me over the years occurred after I had left the school when a faculty member abused his power and got away with it.

Of course, sexual violence is not just a result of school going co-ed. It can, and has happened, in samesex environments both at BNKS and elsewhere as well.

However, the patriarchal society does render women and girls more vulnerable. And our collective refusal to speak about it keeps the cycle of violence going.

As a premier educational institution, BNKS has created

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25 YEARS OF CO-ED IN BNKS

Progress is a gradual and an ongoing process.

In the 25 years after the inception of Co-Ed, progress has definitely been made, albeit in small steps every year. opportunities for thousands of Nepali women and men - it definitely has for me, and given the broader world professionals who strive to do their best regardless of their field of choice.

Because of the impact it has on so many, it also needs to hold itself accountable to higher standards.

It owes it to its students and to the world.

Sneedha Mainali: When I joined BNKS, it had already been CoEd for eight years and one-third of the students were girls at the time. It was a big transition for me coming to the Co-Ed environment from a ‘Girls Only’ school, having studied in Mahendra Bhavan School from grade 4 to SLC. I had lots of expectations as a teenage girl and was eagerly looking forward to the experience. However, to my utter disappointment, this turned out not to be the case. (To this day, I cannot gather fond memories from my A-levels years at BNKS.) The first shocking experience was how little interaction was allowed between the two genders in the classrooms- I recall an instance when I had randomly chosen a seat in a classroom, only to be bitterly reminded that there were distinct gender-demarcated sections in the classroom and the seat I happened to choose did not conform to my gender. Eight years is a significant amount of time, and one would expect the Co-Ed culture to have had a strong footing in the school by then; however, the school was still strongly male dominated, partly because of the fact that two third

majority were boys and partly because the attitude of openness and mutual respect had hardly moved on from its infancy.

Talking to boys would give rise to catcalls and one would immediately be in the center of an unhealthy attention. This was true with the boys as welltheir nervousness used to be clearly evident while interacting with girls, fearful of ‘Bullies’ of the class. A carefree and open communication was simply not there.

Well, those were relatively early days. I believe, and have seen, things are a lot better today. Progress is a gradual and an ongoing process. In the 25 years after the inception of CoEd, progress has definitely been made, albeit in small steps every year, and now has fostered an environment that allows the students to fully engage with one another and build a comfortable community for learning and working to reach their potential.

Post BNKS, being out of school and being accepted as the president of SEBS was an overwhelming experience for me, an experience as far from and as diametrically opposed to the co-ed experience of school, as could be. It was a blessing to have a wonderful atmosphere of help, support and trust, and I am deeply thankful to every member of SEBS for making this cordial environment possible.

Having said that, there is still one thing that often stirs my mind and on which I would like to see some significant progress being made very soon.

SNEEDHA MAINALI (136C) Sneedha is the Immediate Past President of SEBS and lives in Kathmandu. She is a doctor by profession and runs a dental clinic in Jawalakhel, Kathmandu.

With SEBS, I found and relished the opportunity to come to the forefront, and lead, taking the challenges and responsibilities that came with it. The SEBS experience has opened up and allowed to foster many aspects of my personality, which were otherwise latent or suppressed in the want of favorable conditions.

It is an amazing feeling, this metamorphosis, and I totally enjoyed the change together with the challenges. However, I regret to say that, many of my SEBSer Didi-Bahinis are still not able to come out to the fore, a fact clearly evident from their lack of participation in the programs.

While things have changed for the better in so many aspects for SEBS, the participation of females in its programs is, sadly, pathetic. I sincerely hope that moving forward, this will change for the better; SEBS would like to see more of our fellow sisters actively involved in the organization. Let’s wish ourselves better luck with that!

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25 YEARS OF CO-ED IN BNKS

Co-education today in BNKS A current student perspective

ERA POUDEL (7039D) Era Poudel recently completed A-Levels and is a volunteer teacher at BNKS.

Era Poudel: When I first came to Budhanilkantha School in grade four, I was surprised to see girls and boys sitting separately in the same classroom. Later as I grew up, I realized co-education was not just about sitting together in a bench. In our school, both the genders are treated equally, given same level of opportunities, provided alike facilities for education and for extracurricular activities.

There’s no doubt that girls have benefitted from coeducation in BNKS. Co-education has improved the confidence level of many students. I have a friend studying in a girlsonly school who still finds it difficult to interact with boys in her school. That is not a problem I see in the students of Budhanilkantha School- girls and

boys of Budhanilkantha School interact without hesitationwhether in classrooms or participating in extra-curricular activities. Friendship develops naturally and genuinely due to this and in turn, this friendly atmosphere has allowed all of us to express our views openly and assertively. During classroom discussions, both the female and male perspectives are explored; this helps students see issues from a perspective different than their own. And of course, this has also helped boys in similar manner.

In general, providing a coed eduction environment has allowed Budhanilkantha School to be successful in challenging the sexist attitudes. So cheers to 25 years of co-education in BNKS!

An outsider’s view Bishakha Oli: During the summer of 2016, I had the pleasure of attending Budhanilkantha School in Kathmandu, Nepal. It was my summer break here in the US and towards the tail end of our Nepal, Darjeeling, Sikkim visit, my uncle, an alum of the school thought it would be a unique opportunity to experience the BNKS education. So I spent a little over six weeks in BNKS during which I learned many new things and completely immersed myself in the BNKS experience.

I had gone with a predetermined notion that I would encounter more differences between my life here in America and the students’ life in Nepal. I could not have been more wrong.

Starting my first days at BNKS, I was issued my ID and first name while last names omitted and used only for admin work - a simple regulation that goes a long way towards equality of treatment in a caste-based society. When such elements of discrimination are taken away, one is left with just their character and merit, allowing

equal opportunities for all.

Kudos to this system.

One of my greatest passion in life is music. I live and breathe it, in fact, discussing our shared passion for artists such as Ed Sheeran and Shawn Mendes acted as an ice breaker between the students of BNKS and myself. As we grew more comfortable around each other, the girls would ask me questions about my life in the US based on what they had seen in movies and pop culture. Their curiosity about prom and willingness to listen to my stories showed their

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open-mindedness towards cultures different from theirs, a common trait, it seems, in all BNKS students.

BNKS is a boarding school, with over one thousand students living in a hostel environment. One third of the population is female, therefore, I spent a majority of my time with the girls of Tilicho House. Having spent every breathing second with them and coming to know them as amazing people both in and out of school, it is crazy for me to think that less than 30 years ago those girls would not have received the education they deserve simply because of their gender. My uncle graduated from BNKS in 1993. His was the last all boys batch. In talking to him I discovered that it was only in his second to last year of high school, 1992, that the first batch of girls, containing only eight students, were enrolled. Can we pause here for a moment and celebrate their braveness? Bravo to them for opening the doors to future friends of mine. Even in an equality conscious society such as the US, gender-bias is something women and men go through every day, in a developing country such as Nepal, I assume this is an even bigger problem. This year marks a quarter century of BNKS making an effort to rid itself of this gender-bias through the introduction of co-education. A feat that should be commended and celebrated.

During my time at BNKS, I got to witness the effects that co-education and equal opportunities had directly had on the female students. Unfortunately, girls have systematically been discriminated against in Nepali society, where preference

BISHAKHA OLI (9146D) Ms. Oli was a guest student at BNKS for six weeks in summer of 2016. She is a junior (11th grader) at Falmouth Academy in Massachusetts, USA. She was born in Nepal and had attended St. Mary’s School in Kathmandu until 3rd grade. Her research on long terms effects of pollution in marine life received an Honorable mention by MIT.

towards sons often leave girls to do household chores in rural Nepal, creating a stigma that women are not as capable as men. Co-education works to counteract that by working as an equalizer, and I can say from experience that the girls at BNKS definitely take full advantage of this opportunity.

Every student at BNKS, girls AND boys seem to realize their luck at going to such an inclusive school and utilize it to the fullest by engaging in everything the school has to offer, whether it be through Cultural Programs, the myriad sports competitions, or dozens of clubs. Yet, even with so much opportunity there are always areas of improvements. BNKS should definitely encourage gendermixed academic projects where real world team-work is emphasized. Gender mixed

sports events are another great way to foster confidence and encourage conversations that take away the shyness and mystery of the opposite sex.

Teachers should learn to trust students, particularly girls, that not every act they commit will be immoral.

I went to BNKS because I wanted to experience new things and to hopefully give back to the community in the process. However, I have gotten and learned a lot more from BNKS than I could have ever possibly given it. It has inspired me to not take my American life for granted and to make the best out of what I am given, just as the BNKS students have been doing for so long. It has given me memories that I will cherish forever and friends to last a lifetime- and for all this I will be eternally grateful. I will always remember the didi who got up at 5:30 am every morning to study- who told me that had it not been for BNKS she would probably be taking care of goats and walking to fetch firewood from mountains in some rural village in western Nepal. For once she had a better shot at life than her brothers who are most likely stuck doing those exact chores. BNKS is a unique amalgamation of everything Nepal has to offer in terms of its uniqueness and culture, and it is dismal to think that this pot was half empty 25 years ago.

With co-ed we can thus celebrate the full diversity of the nation in that melting pot. With all that said, I must admit what I have witnessed first hand- that the true value of BNKS lies not inside that melting pot but in its vast global networks of its alumni outside. Happy 25th years of Co-ED Budhanilkantha.

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NEWS AND ANNOUNCEMENTS

Post-earthquake Reconstruction Update SEBS-North America Donates NRs 2 Million to BNKS Tuesday May 16th, 2017 was a very special day at BNKS. Entire school gathered in the Assembly Hall. Current Executive Committee Member and Immediate Past President, Mr. Kiran Sitoula (268B) announced that as a part of alumni’s commitment to support BNKS, SEBSNorth America was donating to school NRs 2 million. School used this donated amount to rebuild Nilgiri house bathroom and Learning Resource Center which were damaged by the Earthquake in 2015.

On the occasion, Mr. Sitoula also handed over 10th Edition of National Geographic Atlas, SAT Prep books and many new English library books that were donated by SEBSers in North America.

Similarly, to support PE department Mr. Sitoula also introduced a volunteer from his Town of Indian Head, Ms. Luna Conley who will be teaching at BNKS for 4 months. 2 Sets of Megaphone will soon be donated to BNKS to support its sports program as well.

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NEWS AND ANNOUNCEMENTS

Devi Primary School

CLASSROOM 6600X4100

CLASSROOM 6600X4100

SEBS-Reconstruction Project

GROUND FLOOR KP-04

PROPOSED SRIDEVI SCHOOL

S NO DATE 1 26 FEBURARY 2017

1:200

AS SHOWN

SITE PLAN

JUNE 2015 S- 06-15

In the aftermath of the devastating earthquake of April 25, 2015, SEBS extended its helping hands to rescue and relief efforts on the ground. The following year, while the nation was still reeling from the subsequent aftershocks, SEBS felt the obligation to take initiative on recovery and reconstruction and set up the SEBS-Reconstruction Project Committee in April 2016.

In light to the education crisis brought about by the earthquake, SEBS-Reconstruction Project Committee and SEBS, upon consultation with SEBSNA, selected the education sector for reconstruction project.

SEBS-Reconstruction Project is rebuilding Shree Devi Primary School in Bhaktapur district. The SEBS-Reconstruction Project team has completed all the legal requirements and has obtained approval from the relevant government entities for reconstruction. The school design is approved.

A tripartite agreement is done with National Reconstruction Authority and Central Level Project Implementation Unit for the reconstruction.

At the moment, the school is doing homework, with community engagement, to dismantle the damaged school building and to level out the construction site. Once these tasks are completed, the construction work will begin.

We are constructing a two-storied building with four classrooms. The estimated cost of construction is USD 100,000. The project will be carried out by SEBS-Reconstruction Project Committee strictly

UTS SS

KP-01

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under the SEBS terms and policies.

We have set up the target to complete the construction work within one year from the date of agreement. On consideration of the ongoing monsoon followed by a month long festival season, we have planned to begin the construction of the building immediately after Tihar (approximately in two and half months). It is our commitment to finish up the construction work right before the beginning of the next academic session so that the school is able to run smoothly.

Our aim is to rebuild, revitalize the school environment and assist in gradual growth of the institution.

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NEWS AND ANNOUNCEMENTS

Kanpur School Library Project Partnership Project between SEBS-North America and NAFA On April 9, 2017, SEBS-NA and Nepalis and Friends Association, Arizona (NAFA) entered into a new agreement to authorize SEBS-NA to execute Kanpur School - Library Project in Kavre. This school was one of the many schools affected by 2015 earthquake.

On May 8th, 2017, our team led by Mr. Kiran Sitoula, Bharat Nepali (Project Manager) and Kaushal Raj Sapkota (VP of SEBS) traveled to Kanpur School in Kavre and met with the students, Principal and Staffs of school management committee to understand what their needs are and how we could support them.

It was a 3.5 hours journey from KTM along a dirt road to reach school. School provides education to students within 1.5 hours radius of walking distance.

It is predominantly a Tamang Community and a poverty stricken area. School Management

access to Library by creating age appropriate small mobile library within each classroom.

Design has been submitted to the carpenter and request for desired book list has now been received from the school. Bharat Nepali will be the coordinator in Nepal and Tirthaman Tamang 312B will be recruited local rep.

As a goodwill we donated National Geographic Atlas (10 lbs. weight) from USA to Kanpur School. Bharat Nepali handed it over to the Principal of the school amidst the ceremony with students.

Committee is progressive in thoughts and open to ideas.

Library establishment: Students and teachers did not have alternative resources for them to read or reference.

So we proposed to democratize

Next Steps: We will finalize the design of library furniture for internal classroom. We will share that with NAFA team and the school management and see if local resources are available to procure it.

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News & Announcements SEBS-NA Annual Reunion 2017 SEBS-NA Reunion 2017 will be held in Charlotte, NC during the Labor Day weekend (September 1-3, 2017). This is to coincide with the 13th NASeA/ANMA joint convention 2017 Visit http://jointconvention.org/

Budhanilkantha School Endowment Fund (BSEF) announcement and update After 3 years of behind the scene hard work, Internal Revenue Service (IRS) has granted NotFor-Profit designation to BSEF as Section 501(c) (3) on June 22, 2017. We were assisted by law firm Simpson, Thacher & Bartlett LLP from New York on a pro bono basis. BSEF will exclusively focus on the operational and infrastructure needs of Budhanilkantha School. So please look for further announcements with regards to Endowment Fund in the near future.

SEBS-NA and Namlo Europa sign agreement SEBS-North America and Namlo Europa have signed an agreement whereby SEBS-NA will facilitate Namlo Europa in its fundraising efforts in the US and transfer the raised funds to Nepal.

Associacio Namlo Europa is a non-profit organization registered in Barcelona Spain, working in education and development in Nepal.

After the signing of the agreement, SEBS-NA has transferred over NPR 300,000 to the beneficiary in Nepal (Kyamin High School in Tanahun).

SEBS-NA is proud to help and facilitate international organizations interested in helping Nepal.

Congratulations and Thank You to SEBS Executive Committee We would like to thank the outgoing SEBS Executive Committee in Nepal for their tremendous work and their successful tenure (2015-2017).

We would also like to congratulate and welcome the new SEBS Executive Committee (2017-2019) led by Vidhan Rana (349C) and look forward to working better together!

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Alumni Database Update

Congratulations and Best Wishes

We would like to request you to help us by providing your full name with roll number, email address, phone number and mailing address for Budhanilkantha School Alumni Database.

We would like to congratulate all SEBS members who took the next step in their lives- who graduated from colleges and universities, or got married or had children this year.

Since we are collecting personal information, we would like to give you a summary of how we plan to use it.

1. There is an ‘official’ Alumni Database Team consisting of the following people • Mr. Atiram KC, Vice Principal of Budhanilkantha School • Dolma Gurung, BNKS Alumni Relations Officer • Vidhan Rana, SEBS President • Krishna Chhetri, SEBS-NA President • Bikash Adhikari, SEBS Vice President • Bharat Kandel, SEBS-NA Vice President • Rajan Nepal, sebsonline admin • Kiran Sitoula, SEBS-NA Ex-President • Laxman Pandey, Treasurer SEBS-NA • Pranab Lohani, Executive Member, SEBS-NA • Dilli Paudel, Project Coordinator We have recruited batch representatives to help us collect alumni contact information.

2. We will put the data in a centralized location with appropriate access controls. For example, the ‘official’ Database Team has access to all the information, but the batch representatives have access to their batch data only.

3. We have created a set of guidelines for how the information will be used. We will update the guidelines based on feedback provided by batch representatives.

4. We will create a user-friendly website where you can create, access and update your profile.

We will provide appropriate privacy controls to limit access to your data. The website will have a search interface to look up alumni data.

The amount of information displayed in search results will be based on your privacy settings.

Photo credits SEBS members and SEBS affiliated partners.

To include your information in this special section, please send the detail to us at sebsna@ sebsonline.org.

About us Society of Ex-Budhanilkantha Students North America (SEBS-NA), is a charitable not-for profit organization, representing alumni of Budhanilkantha School in North America. It was formed in July 2000 and received 501 (C)(3) tax exempt status in 2002 from IRS. SEBS_NA focuses on: 1) Providing assistance to its alumni members in North America, 2) Assisting Budhanilkantha School to meet its educational objectives, and 3) Conducting social relief and educational programs in Nepal and North America.

Donations to SEBS-NA is tax deductible and can be made via online at: http://www. sebsonline.org/donation/

Mailing Address: SEBS North America 3348 Conquistador Ct, Annandale, VA 22003 Phone Number: 703-273-7959 E-Mail Address: sebsna@sebsonline.org

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SEBS North America Executive Committee 2015-2017 SEBS-NA Excomm E-Mail Address: sebsna@sebsonline.org

PRESIDENT:

EXECUTIVE MEMBER 1:

Krishna Chhetri (503B) San Francisco, CA chhetri@gmail.com

Shyam Aryal (178B) Morrissville, NC ShAryal@hotmail.com

VICE PRESIDENT: Bharat Kandel (819B) Saint Charles, MO BPLK819@yahoo.com GENERAL SECRETARY: Manoj Bista (266C) Philadelphia, PA Manoj.Bista@gmail.com TREASURER: Laxman Pandey (328B) Annandale, VA lup328@gmail.com JOINT SECRETARY: Elen Shrestha (115C) Burlingame, CA ElenShrestha@gmail.com IMMEDIATE PAST PRESIDENT: Kiran (Ron) Sitoula (268B) Indian Head, MD sitoula@gmail.com TECHNOLOGY ADVISER: Rajan Nepal (418B) Saint Charles, MO admin@sebsonline.org

EXECUTIVE MEMBER 2: Kiran Kattel (285B) San Francisco, CA KKattel@gmail.com EXECUTIVE MEMBER 3: Kamal Ranabhat (287B) Baltimore, MD Kamal.Ranabhat@gmail.com EXECUTIVE MEMBER 4: Deepak Gyawali (291B) San Mateo, CA DRGyawali@gmail.com EXECUTIVE MEMBER 5: Anshu Shrestha (591B) Los Angeles, CA Anshu.Shrestha@gmail.com EXECUTIVE MEMBER 6: Pranita Sharma (798B) St. Louis, MO spranita798@gmail.com EXECUTIVE MEMBER 7: Pranab Lohani (014B) New York, NY PranabRaj@gmail.com