Obscure Sports Magazine - August 2010

SPORTS OBSCURE magazine AUGUST 2010

PASSPORT TO CHAMPIONSHIPS BR I NG YOUR OWN BI K E

KICKBAL L 365.COM COMP L ETING THE CIRCUIT VIRGIN T E RRIT ORY: WAR RIOR D AS H REVIEW S: OBSC URE S POR T iPH O N E APP Z

www.obscuresportsmag.com

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[ Contents ]

AUGUST 2010

www.obscuresportsmag.com

[ Cover Story ] Passport to Championships:

p. 8

Bring Your Own Bike

To p l a y a s p ort i s o n e thi ng , to tr avel ar ound the w o r l d a n o t h e r. To tra ve l w i th bags, a bike, and p la y y o u r s po rt a rou n d the w o r ld – totally cool.

K ri s Sz a t m a r y he a d s to N A H B PC in M adison to ch e c k o u t a n e vo l vi n g sp o rt w i th wor ldwide appeal f o r p l a y e r s an d fa n s.

Completing the Circuit

Guest contributor Meg Simone brings you up to speed on Kickball365’s competitive play and rewarding brainchild, “The Circuit.”

[ Quick Hits ]

p.6 - Upon Further Review Our favorite obscure sports clips

p.7 - Do’s & Don’ts

What every sports-loving fashionista needs to know

p.18

p.23 - Photo Tag

Think you’re witty? Win an OSM tee!

p.29 - 1/2 Page Fowling

[ Columns ]

p.4 - By The Glass

Review:

Obscure Sport iPhone appz beware. Michael Votto is looking for you.

Nobody’s Perfect

p.12 - Virgin Territory Mud, Sweat, Beers

p.22 - Master Debaters

More dangerous? Kickball vs Dodgeball

p . 24

p.26 - The “O” List

5 Best Flying Disc Games

p.31 - Final Word

“It All Comes Out in the Wash” 3

by the glass WOW, it has been a crazy summer so far in professional sports officiating. One has to wonder if the actual officiating has gotten worse or if the lens of the microscope in which we watch has been magnified. My guess - it’s the microscope.

Back in the day people could only rely on what they saw when they were at the actual sports venue. Nowadays you can turn your HDTV on and watch sports broadcasts showing replays in super slo-mo at 200 frames per second in crystal clear 1080i. Not much room for error as an ump, ref, or official.

Take Jim Joyce, for example, the ump that blew a call in the 9th inning that cost the Detroit Tiger’s pitcher Armando Galarraga a perfect game. A PERFECT GAME. This is something that has only been done 20 times ever in the history of MLB. Any soccer fans out there? How about some of the calls made during the World Cup? The U.S. and England have the biggest gripes, with 3 goals combined taken away or not even counted.

These are highly paid and highly skilled officials making bad calls.

You’ve read about these stories in blogs and newspapers, watched them over and over on ESPN, and probably sat around somewhere at work talking about them as well. I’m not saying anything new here.

I repeat, these are highly paid and highly skilled officials making bad calls.

Nobody’s perfect.

Not even the volunteer/underpaid ump that just blew a call against your kickball team, the ref who didn’t call the penalty during your bike polo match, or the official who didn’t see the person get hit with a dodgeball. Just something to keep in mind whether you are warming up or winding down in your obscure sports seasons. Try to keep it all in perspective..

Daniel B. Glass Creative Director Obscure Sports Magazine

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CONTRIBUTORS

Contributor Question of the Month: What are three adjectives that describe your first bike?

Follow us on your favorite social networking site...

Daniel B. Glass Creative Director “Blue, Durable, Rad”

dan@obscuresportsmag.com

Andy Buteyn Drawing Guy “Red, Cruiser, Second-Hand” andy@obscuresportsmag.com

Jodi Neitzel Marketing/Contributor “Radical, Tubular, Badass” jodi@obscuresportsmag.com

Andrea Spiegelberg Contributor “Green, Sparkly, Floral Seat” andrea@obscuresportsmag.com

Contact Us...

Obscure Sports Magazine 4918 West Vliet St Milwaukee, WI 53208 414-454-0447 info@obscuresportsmag.com check out our BLOG

Kristine Szatmary Editor/Contributor “Pink, Glittery, Banana Seat” kris@obscuresportsmag.com

Jami Topolovich Photographer/Contributor “Red, Fearless, Sassy” jami@obscuresportsmag.com

BALL-JOINTING pinning the ball between an open end of the mallet head and the playing surface and then dragging

Michael Votto Contributor “Cheap, Blue, Unused” mvotto@obscuresportsmag.com

Jake Wallendal Contributor “Never learned to ride”

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Upon Further Review...

1. billy madison A deleted scene from the Billy Madison DVD. He plays kickball with a bunch of the employees of the house and ends up going crazy because of a bad call. Hmmm, even in the movies, douchebaggery runs wild.

2. boondocks Fans of Adult Swim on Cartoon Network might be familiar with this little gem that aired May 16th. This is only the promo video.

A full version of the episode can be found with a little Google search. Well worth it.

3. napoleon dynamite Love it or hate it, no denying this movie’s influence on pop culture. This clip is from the deleted scenes on the DVD. Very rough cut with the timecode still embedded and no color correction. Love the size of the ball!

4. The sarah silverman show The now canceled show on Comedy Central has Sarah playing kickball with a few friends.

Is it just me or would it be funnier if she crushed the old guy with the ball instead of just tagging him? Oh well... he gets his.

5. party down Another cult hit canceled. Starz is struggling with their original series lineup, unlike the popular HBO and Showtime. This is the promo video which pits the Party Down crew against rival catering company Valhalla.

Got a funny clip? We want to see it! Send us the link at ufr@obscuresportsmag.com 6

Do’s & Don’ts

No wrong answers here... just doing our part to help the helpless figure it out.

a win t ir t- s h

D e ta il belo s w

This Ozzy Osbourne roadie is a clear cut DO! Most men over 55 just throw clothes on and screw the fashion. “Shot in the Dark” here likes to keep himself color coordinated while still expressing his inner “Crazy Train.” Socks match the shorts and the shoes match his kick-ass studded belt. His camera case not only stays in the color scheme of accessories, but also keeps his camera safe and his Newport 100’s from getting crushed. Keeping the shirt off, but handy, is mandatory in Wisconsin. Concealing those guns is a felony in this state and he needs the shirt in case he wants a tapper of PBR at the corner tavern. The only knock here is that his hoop earring seems to lack a dagger or skull, but I’m not saying a word! I’m fairly certain he taught Dalton how to rip out throats as seen in Road House.

Send us your pictures to dodont@obscuresportsmag.com and win a t-shirt if we use it.

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PASSPORT TO CHAMPIONSHIPS

by Kr i s S zat m ar y

BRI NG Y OUR OW N B I KE

Wh e n yo u h e ar that a nea r by c i ty ha s been selected to host t he Nort h A merican Hard co u r t B i ke Po l o C h am p i onshi ps ( NAHB PC or NA s), go willingly - by foot , by bike, by bus , by car - to c h e c k o u t a n evol vi ng spor t w i th fixed-gear bike ent husiast s buzzing in act ion at t h e g ro u n d level . Leave the horses at home. Don’t worr y, you won’t ruin a pair o f s h o e s d i vo t sto m p in g a nd you ca n l eave the hat s and suit s in t he closet . Noise is expected an d yo u wo n ’t n e ed bi noc ul a rs – wel l , unless you are reffing.

B i ke p o lo p layers f rom m a ny ti m e zones converged at Madison College’s Truax cam p u s te n n i s co u r t s in M a di son, Wi sconsi n on J uly 16-18. Temps were high and t he s u n was h o t. Fo r s o me, the j our ney to M a dison likely started days or even weeks befo re t h e event . I t can ta ke a bi t of l og i sti ca l ingenuit y to get t he bike, required gear, an d o t h er u n me nt io n a b l es to a nother c i ty. T he parking lot was proof t hat bike polo players will go th e ex t ra m il e or ki l om eter to pa r ti c ipate in t he can’t-miss event s of t he season . R id esh a ri n g i s co mm on a nd coul d a l so m ean a few pickup games along t he way on t h e ro ad to a n at i o n a l tour na m ent. M ore than likely, t he pickup games bring toget her p layers w h o al read y k n ow ea c h other f rom tournament s or The League of Bike Polo foru m s .

M y jou r n ey to t he NAs wa s a 60 m i nute car ride. No toll ways or securit y chec kp o int s to p a s s t h ro u g h to rea c h the energetic and exot ic scene t hat surrounded me. Cou nt le s s u n atte n d e d b i kes spraw l ed out i n the open spaces, mallet s leaned ever y which way n ex t to b i kes an d agai nst the cour t boa rds, while sunburned, sweat y bike polo players grab b e d so me s h a d e i n t he off i c i a l ’s tent a round a telev ision running t hrough t he list of c reat ive te a m n am es a n d scores. A f ul l bi ke rack near anot her tent emblazoned wit h t h e Trek l o go a p p e are d to be the spot to f i nd repair tools and couches. My eyes jumped over t h e 8

me ga o ran ge water cool ers stati oned near th e co u r t s a n d noti c ed i c ed coffee and f re sh co co n u t s for sa l e. Af ter a l i ttle boy to l d m e w h e re to f i nd the por ta bl e toilet s, I k n ew ever y t h i ng I needed to sur vi ve t he n ex t few h o u rs wa s a c c essi bl e. I didn’t n o ti c e a f irst a i d stati on, but I wasn’t p l a n n in g to get hur t or see bl ood.

Th e ten n is co u r ts were tra nsfor m ed into a b i ke p o lo a rena . It wa s ea sy to get a 3 6 0 - d e g re e vi ew of a l l the ga mes in p ro g res s .

I watc hed tea m s m a neuver a ro u n d t h e co ur ts effor tl essl y.

Players kept t h ei r b al a nc e w i th one ha nd on a h a n d l e b ar an d the other ha nd hol ding a ma l l et . T h e 3 - on- 3 pl ayer for m at made it p o ssi b l e to fo c us my ga ze on the players’ moves a n d t h e ba l l at the sa m e ti m e. Only a co ur t s i d e b o a rd stood between me and th e a c t io n .

t he same game cheered for players by n am e, yelled out a rule clarificat ion or t wo, an d heck led t he refs. “Oh, and t here ’s M ar k Capriott i,” he said point ing out one o f t h e players on t he court . “He’s one of th e b e st – a talented player from Philly.”

I was curious about t he cost s and h ow tournament play differs from all t h e ot her ways one can fit some bike p o lo into t he week or t heir life. He a d m itte d t hat a decent bike was fine and p ro b ab ly better for t raveling. Let ’s see - add u p t h e regist rat ion fees, t hrow in some be er an d food money, and consider some c re at ive lodging and t ransportat ion ideas to get from point A to point B. S ounds afford ab le, right ? My guess is t hat any t hing is p o s s ib le if you are part of t he bike polo comm u n it y.

This was a great event overflowin g wit h players and fans.

Organizers s h if t in g

Th e p lay wa s non- stop. As soon as one ro u n d e n d ed , a nother sta r ted. T h e mix o f m en an d wom en, the va r i ety of bikes a n d att i re, p e p pered w i th a ra nge of ages, l a n g u age s , a n d a c c ents m a de for spicy sp ectato r enter ta i nm ent.

As I ro tate d between cour ts, I not iced fa mi l ia r fa c e s , but no one that I knew by n a m e . W h il e watc hi ng a tea m i n orange sh i rts p l ay, I sta r ted up a conversat ion w i th an o t h er p l ayer /spec tator w ho gave me m o re p ers p ec ti ve on the ga m e. Hailing f ro m S e att l e and hea ded to Guatemala in Septem b er fo r a tour na m ent, he kept an eye o n t h e gam e, but sha red som e tips on th e r u le s an d p oi nted out som e i ndi vidual eq u i pm e nt p referenc es. I know I wasn’t th i n k i n g a b o u t how the hot sun beat ing d ow n o n t h e cour t affec ts the ba l l unt il we tal ked . Ba nter between pl ayers and sp ectato rs go t l ouder a nd he explained th at t h e o ran ge tea m pl ays g ra ss court polo i n P h o e n i x , b u t now ha rdcour t, too. The Ph o e n ix Bike Pol o c l ub wa s tur ni ng heads a n d n o t j u st b e ca use they ha d a tea m wit h two 1 2 -ye a r- o l ds a nd fa ns. O thers watching 9

ge a rs b eh in d - the-sc enes ha d to be re sp o n s i b l e fo r m a ki ng i t possi bl e. The o rga n izat i o n a l fi nesse requi red to pu ll off a we e ke n d to ur na m ent ca n’t be a s easy a s l ear n i n g to r i de a bi ke. Tea m s in t he 20 10 No r t h A mer i ca n Ha rdcour t B i ke Polo C h a m p i o n s h i ps ca n tha nk thei r l uc ky chains th at M ad i s o n is hom e to Jonny Hunter, one o f s everal key orga ni zers for the l argest to u rn am ent to date i n Nor th Am er i ca . Wit h ove r 5 ye a rs o f pl ayi ng exper i enc e a n d as a me mb er o f t h e Nor th Am er i ca n Ha rdcourt Orga n i z i n g Bo d y, Hunter i s com m i tted to d eve l o p i n g s u c c essf ul bi ke pol o event s. If yo u a re h o p i n g to showca se your bi ke polo ski l l s c lo s e to h om e a nd get i nvol ved as a to u rn am ent o rga ni zer, keep a few things I l ea rned f ro m J onny i n m i nd.

An event o f t h is si ze wi l l a l ways have loose en d s an d c h a l l enges. An i m por ta nt part o f kee p in g t h e ga m es on sc hedul e i s direct co m m u n icat i o n w i th the tea m s before a n d at t h e event. O ne souveni r from th e M ad i s o n tour na m ent i s a computer sch e d u li n g p rog ra m .

Hunter a dv ises f u tu re o rgan i zers, “ m a ke sure you have yo u r s c h ed u li n g down to a sc i enc e, use a co m p u te r p ro g ra m ,…use ours so hopefully a l l th e wo r k isn’t for j ust one tourney.”

C l o s e r to t h e cour t, com m uni cati on can be i m p rove d . H u nter sug gests “ f i nd bi g t imers so th e p l aye rs know how m uc h ti m e is left i n e ac h ga m e. Keep ca l l i ng pena l ti es.”

H u nter a d m it s g ratef ul l y that Trek ’s p re sen c e h el p ed l eg i ti m i ze the event and o p e n ed d o o rs .

B i ke pol o-pl ayi ng Trek employees helped secure Trek’s involvement i n o rgan i z i n g the event. Whi l e Hunter ma n a ge d to com pete i n the tour nament a n d h ave f u n , hi s tea m “ …di dn’t compete ver y well . O u r tea m pl ayed wel l bel ow our n o rm a l l eve l . Pl ayi ng a nd orga ni zi ng was re a l l y to u g h , b ut I woul dn’t c ha nge t hat , I l ove t h e gam e a nd that i s why I wanted to o rgan i ze t hi s tour na m ent.” Wit h or w i th ou t s p o n s ors, pl ayers seem m ore t han 10

willing to help organize tournam e nt s , volunteer t heir t ime, and play for reward s t hat have no cash value. Teams p aid $ 9 0 to compete in t he NA s. The top prize was a cash award of $3600 for t ravel to t h e World Hardcourt Bike Polo Champi o n s h ips in Berlin, Germany scheduled for A u gu st 13-15.

A s bike polo becomes increasingly p o p u lar, t he players organizing and voluntee r in g to expand tournament offering s will need more help. When asked if t h e s p o r t welcomes volunteers who are never go in g to get on t he court wit h a bike and m allet , Hunter confirmed, “t his tour n am ent would not have happened wit hou t t h o s e volunteers, t hey helped build cou r t s , r u n t he scheduling , got water, food, all kin d s of work . Those folks deser ve t he m o st credit .” The referees are also volu ntee rs , and as expected, “t he best refs are t h e best players,” according to Hunter.

A fter spending one afternoon at NA s , I counted myself among t he target au d ie n ce t hat would pay to watch a bi ke p o lo tournament . It ’s nice to k now t hat I can watch t he local club pract ice on Su n d ay afternoons, but I wouldn’t mind s ee in g some regional rivalries played ou t m o re dramat ically or in an indoor venue. W h ile t he pace of t he tournament was re laxe d , I wondered how anyone could con d it io n t hemselves to play hours of bike pol o in t h e

h eat, catc h u p wi th ol d a nd new f r iends, a n d stay o u t late for the af ter part ies.

M ay b e E lto n J ohn m usi c ha s som et hing to d o w i t h i t ? I predi c t there w i l l come a d ay w h en s p ec tators w i l l pay to watch t he a c ti on o n t h e cour t. Hunter a g rees, “ Yes, I th i n k o n c e t hi s spor t g rows a bi t more we ca n c h arge for hi g h qua l i ty m atc hes. I d o n ’t s ee t h is a s the nor m , but I ca n see it h a p p en in g fo r m a j or tour na m ents.”

An o th er m aj o r tour na m ent awa i ts Nort h Ame r i can H a rd cour t B i ke Pol o C ha mpions M a rk C a p r i o tt i , Ni c k Va ug ha n, a nd Chris Ro b er t s – a ka, T he O dds.

T hey had th e i r s ig ht s s et on travel i ng to Berlin fo r t h e 2 0 1 0 Wor l d Ha rdcour t B i ke Polo C h a m p io n s h i ps wel l before wi nni ng NA s.

To u rn a m ent p lay a ga i nst ea c h other over th e ye ars b ro u g ht thi s tr i o together and th ey ’ve m an a ged to pra c ti c e a s a team d esp ite li vi n g i n 3 di fferent c i ti es. P lay ing to get h e r i n Ma di son wa s not a f i rst date fo r t h es e s e as oned tour na m ent players, b u t Vau g h a n a dm i ts, “ i t wa s the tr i al run fo r th e te a m .” Never m i nd that Va ughan travel ed to NA s wi th a sec ret wea pon – t he B attl eA xe by F B M - a bi ke he ha d onl y been o n fo r o n e wee k.

Madison, including J onny Hunter. Th is will be Vaughan’s first t ime across t he o cean .

Capriott i has never played pol o o u t s id e of Nort h A merica. Hunter has t ravele d often for polo and k nows first hand t h at it is bot h expensive, but wort hwhile. H u nter appreciates t hat t ravel means, “you get to meet folks from all over who can co n n e ct on t he same level.”

Good luck to t he NA Champs, Hunte r, an d ever yone else headed to Worlds . M ay you avoid pay ing ex t ra fees to get t h o s e bikes on t he plane and gett ing fined by t h e German polizei for not hav ing at least o n e hand brake on your bike. There will b e s o much to explore as bike polo playe rs in a new cit y wit h fresh compet it ion and e ager spectators await ing your arrival.

Kn owi n g e ac h other ’s strengths and we a k n es s e s , s om e pi c k up ga m es before NAs, a n d 2 d ays of round robi n pl ay prepared Th e O d d s fo r Sunday ’s f i na l ga m e and v i ctor y. C a p r i otti a c know l edges pract ice i s n ec e s s a r y to be good at bi ke pol o, but “ i t ’s even mo re i m por ta nt to pract ice to get h e r, s in c e at thi s poi nt you ca nnot be su cces sf u l in b ike pol o unl ess you work well a s a te a m .” Va ug ha n a nd C a pr i otti bot h re co g n i ze t h at s ki l l a nd exper i enc e helped th e m w i n t h e tour na m ent, but Va ughan a l so c red it s a d a pta bi l i ty a nd a wi l l i ngness to l ea r n f ro m o t her tea m s.

Wi th p r i ze m o n ey, pa sspor ts, a nd brag ging ri g ht s as t h e N A c ha m ps i n thei r court , Th e O d d s a re off to B er l i n to l ea r n more a n d re u n i te w i th pl ayers they fa ced in 11

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y r ito

r r Te

MUD SWEAT BEERS

by A n d y B u tey n

Photographs by Cindy Butey n

M y wi fe , C in d y, tol d m e a bout the Warrior Dash and immediately I said, “Registe r u s !”

By th e t im e we reg i stered there were only t wo heat s open. Once I committed to d o in g th e Wa r r i o r D ash, I dec i ded to do i t all t he way and hold not hing back .

C i n an d I d rove to the pa r ki ng si te and I was amazed at t he level of organ izat io n .

Eve r yo n e p a r ke d i n the ra c eway f i el d and queued up to ride a cont inuous line o f b u s e s to th e ac t u al event si te. We got to the Warrior Dash several hours early to soak u p t h e atmo s p h e re an d w ra p our hea ds a round t he event .

Arri v in g at t h e s i te, the m ost over w helming feat ure was t he mud. Mud ever y where. Th e p rev i o u s n i g ht tor renti a l ra i ns ha d soaked t he area. The grounds crew laid st raw d own to ma ke t h e festi va l g rounds wa l ka bl e. S tep off t he st raw and end up ankle deep i n m u d so u p . Eve r yo n e wa s covered hea d- to-toe in mud. It was a badge of courage.

Eve nt u a l l y o u r heat ti m e a r r i ved. As I anxiously waited to start , t he MC shouted gi b b er is h a n d pl eas a nt r i es. Fi na l l y, f i re ca nnons shot a blaze high into t he air. This mar ked t h e sta rt o f o u r r u n throug h the obsta c l es.

I a m n o t a p a c e person, espec i a l l y i n a race sett ing. If t here are people in front o f m e I w i l l c h a s e t h em. I know thi s. I a m not a real runner. I started t he Warrior Dash to o fast- way to o fa st . As I sa i d, I pl a nned on doing it all out . S o I figure, “oh well.” I ch u g o u t , p a s si n g we ake r l i nks, r unni ng w i th reck less abandon and not even considering w h at els e I h a d to fa c e - - t he obsta c l es.

M y m e m o r y o f the order i n whi c h the obstacles occurred is hazy (at best ) and d iffere nt f ro m t h e ro u te show n on the web si te but I do remember running t hrough a win d in g , mu d d y t re e ma ze that beg ged to rol l an ankle. I remember climbing over a gia nt wire sp o o l ( t h an k f u ll y there wa s a bottl e n eck at t he spool allowing me to catch my b reat h ) .

Nex t, I t h i n k we went down a hi l l which opened up to t he rows of junked cars we h ad to 13

cl i mb over. No hood sl i di ng l i ke the Dukes o r H u tc h .

Over t h e ca rs , u p a hi l l , to a ser i es of fourfo o t ta l l wa l l s to hurdl e. O ne hurdl e caught my kn ee . I retai ned a souveni r i n the form o f a s li ver. Nex t, we went up a muddy, ru tty h il l l e ad i ng to a c raw l - throug h t ube (w i th a n o t h e r for tunate bottl e-nec k b reat h catch er ) . T h e n dow n a steep m uddy hill a n d a c ro s s a d e ep ravi ne on a si x- i nc h wide b o a rd. At t h e b a se of the nex t hi l l was a twe nt y by t wenty-foot m ud pi t. T he pit wa s t h ree feet deep. An event vol unteer g u y was ye ll i n g , “Just keep goi ng or you’re go n n a lo s e a s hoe!” I m a de i t a bout halfway ac ro s s b efore the sl i pper y m ud got th e be st o f m e and I fa c e pl a nted. Weighed d ow n w it h s l i c k m ud, we c ha rged up yet a n o ther h il l . T i m e for a nother bottl e-neck b re a k at t h e “cl i m b over the cor r ugated p l a st ic t u b e ” o bsta c l e. T he g i r l i n f ront of me was h avin g som e troubl e w i th this one a n d I was a b l e to g i ve her a ha nd over.

eerie. Then I remembered I was ru n n in g.

The cit y-t hing rambled and meandere d . I ’m sure t here were a couple of hills i n t h e re too. I ran a bit . I ran up and over a st raw mound like a flight of stairs, in t wo m ight y steps.

The end was gett ing near.

I sprinted to t he cargo net climb--p ie ce o f cake. I saw t he finish line and got a litt le charged up. It ’s just t hrough t he t ires , around t he corner and done! I picke d u p my pace again. No rolled ank le o n t h e t ires! “Keep rolling ,” I tell myself, “ I go t t his.” Then I hit t he series of ten-fo o t tall hills t hat wind and wind and never s e em to stop. I was so close to t he finis h b u t I had to stop and suck air. I dashe d over t he t wo fire bars, dove under t he b ar b e d wire, waded t hrough t wo feet of m u d an d sprinted to t he finish.

A fter finishing , I sensed a camarader i e wit h my fellow warriors. In our mud-cove re d I tu rne d to fac e the nex t obsta c l e a n d for flesh t here was family. Really weird . a m in u te I wa s af ra i d I wa s i n a zombie May be it was t he beer. mov i e . T h e li ttl e a ba ndoned c i ty set was

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3 p o T s ’ o n e B e o J

S p or t s U t i l iz in g Fo o d

1. Hag gis Hurling In a genre dominated by seeing how far you can project different edibles, this is a clear standout. Hag gis hurling seems simple enough, stand atop a whiskey barrel, take aim, and throw your hag gis (tender boiled sheep’s heart, lung and liver with spices, onions, suet and oatmeal and stock - stuffed in a sheep’s paunch, and boiled for three hours) as far as you can. But, take care not to burst your hag gis, for it must be fit to eat upon landing.

2. Cheese Rolling Invented over 200 years ago, this is an oldie but a goodie. Contestants chase a round block of cheese (preferably double gloucester) down a hill (preferably steep and uneven). Winner gets the cheese!

3. Watermelon Skiing Finally, one for the vegans. Lay out a long tarp, slather it with watermelon innards, stick each foot in a watermelon, and get 2 teammates to pull you with a rope as fast and far as possible. Alas, nothing remains to be eaten at the end.

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phot os by Jami Topo lovic h

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Upon first glance, it appears as though you’ve walked by an elementary school midway through recess. A giant orange rubber ball flies through the air and cheers echo down the first baseline. Looking past the team tents, signs, coolers and fans, you see adults of all ages, and instantly realize this is no ordinary game, and this is definitely not recess. Competitors from states up and down the east coast, representing 18

teams from New York to Florida, have traveled to Washington, DC for the second annual Kickball365 Open Tournament. Yes, that’s right, competitive adult kickball. This time, though, bragging rights are not the only thing up for grabs. A cash prize of $3,000 will be awarded to this year’s champion. And the good news—this is only the beginning.

and hosts a National Kickball Power Poll – an independent ranking of the best adult kickball teams in the country. On any given day, the chats featured on the forum receive an average of 300 posts from players and fans alike.

But don’t be fooled---adult kickball is nothing to be taken lightly. As teams are formed, players drafted, tryouts held and official practice schedules sent out, athletes are trained and developed. Rosters are carefully decided upon and strategies are formed.

Some teams have been known to go on scouting missions at nearby universities to find the cream of the crop. Jon Simon, captain of JKI says “We’re all friends off the field and rivals on it. That being said, the heat on the field is quite intense when we play.

We all HATE losing.”

Only after watching a tournament can the competition afforded through the sport of kickball be truly appreciated. Several teams, like the Meatballs, hailing from southern Florida, travel to multiple tournaments each year. Kickball provides more than a chance for adults to play a game—it brings friends together, new and old, provides a fun way to travel the country, and on more than one occasion, has served as an introduction for future newlyweds!

Adult kickball isn’t a new concept. It has been around DC for several years, but tended to be segmented league by league. That’s where Kickball365 comes in. Started in 2006, Kickball365 is the premier adult kickball portal for the world. In addition to its open online forum, it provides kickball-related news, sponsors Kickball Tournaments across the country,

“To those who think that Kickball is still some silly recreational sport meant more for competitive drinking than actual competition, here’s another tidbit: the Meatballs have won more than $10K in prize money this year - and we’re only in July. For a team that carries 15-17 players on its roster, that’s nearly a $1,000 a person. Granted, not nearly enough to make a living on, but certainly enough to recoup some travel expenses,” says Karl P. of Wu Tang Killers.

“And this is a sport that is only in its infancy. There was a time when people laughed about a bunch of guys who got together to throw balls through peach baskets in a gym. Now Kobe Bryant is laughing all the way to the bank.”

In 2010, Kickball365 developed an official rulebook and began its tournament series, The Circuit. In its inaugural year, The Circuit will host four tournaments, and plans to nearly double that next year, with events coast to coast. Each tournament will award a cash prize to the winners, and will raise money to benefit a 19

philanthropy of the Event’s choice. Similar to NASCAR’s Sprint Cup Series, beyond the individual tournament winnings, teams can continue their participation in multiple Circuit Events and vie for the Annual Circuit Cup. Official Circuit Events will draw major sponsors, and will feature not only a one-day tournament, but a weekend of events. This year’s third Circuit Event, the Kickball365 Open Tournament, began with a Meet & Greet party, where pools were drawn, and players were welcomed. Posttournament victories were celebrated at the Saturday night after-party, and the weekend ended with a Major League Soccer DC United / LA Galaxy game and tailgate on Sunday, where Kickball365 had the opportunity to go out on the field and test out their star power on the Jumbo Tron. It was a non-stop event, and one that will not soon be forgotten.

So, what’s in store for the competitive kickball players out there? In a world where you can turn on the TV and watch a national hot dog eating contest, it makes you wonder if kickball will ever go pro. We can’t predict the future, but our fingers are crossed!

If you are looking for more information on The Circuit or just interested in Kickball365, check out some of the links below. www.kickball365.com www.kickball365.com/TheCircuit www.kickball365.com/forum

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21

Master Debaters More Dangerous Sport: Kickball vs. Dodgeball

Do you ever feel like being a risk-taker?

From time to time, why do you ask?

Because I have been playing kickball, and there’s a potential for injury that just makes adrenaline surge through my veins.

We’re talking about kickball? The one played on baseball diamonds or grass fields? What color panties are you wearing?

And I’m guessing you have a more thrilling sport in mind? Quidditch? Candy Land?

How about dodgeball? First, let’s look at the arenas: a nice safe baseball field with freshly poured dirt or a worn hardwood floor inside an unforgiving gym? Seems pretty clear.

What our field lacks in hardness we make up in random obstacles. Running through an outfield to catch a rubber ball is made a lot more dangerous with rogue sticks jabbing at your feet.

Floor burns more than those measly sticks. How about equipment?

Think about how bad a dodgeball to the face hurts?

Okay, I’ll take that bet: a kickball leaves the foot at 70 miles per hour from the best player. A dodgeball clocks in at a mere 33 miles per hour.

Hmm, well, the pitcher is really the only person on the field at risk of taking the brunt of the kick. In dodgeball, the space is smaller so the throw can be more devastating.

Kickball is part baseball, which means frequent sliding if you are competitive. Try doing that with just shorts on.

The word dodgeball evokes the verb “to dodge,” which translates to sometimes leaping from side to side. On hardwood.

I must conclude with the lighter side of injuries: running bases can really be a strain of the legs. Cramps, pulls, tears.

So your panties are pink?

I really do hate you. With the passion of ten-thousand suns do I hate you.

Despite its nautical advantages, the hockey air horn fell to the Vuvuzela, otherwise known as the bane of the World Cup viewing audience. It appears that our readers got soccer fever and couldn’t look past the novelty nature of the African horn - but what do I know? I still think that my rally cap can turn the tide of a game.

Master Debaters message board 22

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win a t-s hir t

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L a s t m o n t h ’ s W i n n e r ! - R u s s k . f rom Minnesota “… i n a c o u p l e o f m o n t h s S m u r f e t t e w i l l h at c h a n d b e g i n t h e s e a r c h f o r h e r fat h e r ! ”

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iPh on e Appz R e vi e w by M ic h a el Vo t to

Dan ge r! Do d ge b all S ome obscure sport s t ranslate well to iP h o n e apps - beer pong sat urates t he market , an d m o st of t he games based on t hat sport are relat ive ly good - but t here hasn’t been a real k n o cko u t dodgeball game. Well, Danger! Dodgeball is st ill not a slam dunk .

Using t he iPhone’s advanced accel ero m eter, t he app pit s you against a formidable op p o n ent Danger Dodgeball inside a gy m. Using t he iPhone as a who le , yo u ca n d o d ge t h rown ba l l s by ti l ti ng the phone to t he left and right wit h var y ing d egree s o f sp ee d to effec ti vel y m i ss bei ng hit . S liding your finger across t he screen ve r t ically th rows t h e b al l , a s you tr y to hi t your adversar y who is cont inually mov ing horizo ntally at a ste a d y p a c e. Power ups ca n be collected, including t he abilit y to t hrow an overs ize d d o d geb al l a n d three ba l l s at a ti m e, adding a more cartoonish nat ure to t he alre ad y ch i l d i s h gam e.

Wh i l e t h e mec ha ni c s of the ga m e a re solid - t he accelerometer is fairly accurate an d a f i n e co nt ro ll er - a nd the g ra phi c s a re sharp on t he screen, t he app is weighed d own by i ts m o n o to n o u s nature a nd l a c k of mult iplay. The game seems like a good star t b u t it d o e s s ee m l i ke a n a ppl i cati on that was a great idea t hat just fizzled. The techn o lo gy is th e re , b u t it fe el s l i ke a n unf i ni shed product , even wit h it s $0.99 price tag.

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iScore B a s e b a l l /i Ref- K i c k b a l l M a d e by Faste r T ha n M onkeys for ESP N, iS core Baseball is a stat ist ics program de s ign e d 24

for ba seball coaches to t rack t heir players t hrough t h e ir i Phones. Tak ing t he place of scoring books, wit h t hei r p age s f i l l ed w i th lines and filled in diamonds, iS core litera lly p u t s ever y thi n g you could possibly need for management at yo u r f i nger ti ps . While it is made especially for use in b as eb all l ea g ues, a few t weaks can make it useful for t he more tech sav v y l ea gue operator.

T he m ec hanics of balls and st rikes are t here, but it wo u ld n ’t be a n ESP N app if it didn’t take it a step furt her. Ne ar ly a l l possi bilit ies are covered in t his excellent ly pro d u ced prog ra m - pitch locat ion, batt ing spray chart s, passed b alls a nd that ’s just t he t ip of t he iceberg. Managing t he stat ist ics of severa l teams is supported and gett ing t he informat io n to your com puter is made simple - t he app allows for exp o r t in g the ga m es t hrough email in several different fo r m at s .

Addi ng even more layers to t his great applicat ion, yo u can iScore Baseball a l so broadcast t he game live t hrough iS corecast , a llowin g m em bers of your league to enjoy t he ongoing batt le o n lin e th ro u g h t h eir web browsers.

Wh i l e k n ow le d ge of a scorebook ca n h elp wit h interpretat ion o f the stat s , o n e of the bi g ger sel l i ng point s is t hat you don’t h ave to k n ow m uc h a bout scorebook ing wit h it s int uit ive i nte rfac e. W it h a l i ttl e i ngenui ty a nd modificat ion, iS core can b e a ga m e - c h a nger for the m ost ser ious of commissioners.

Ex p a n d i n g stat i sti c s f rom si m pl e hi ts and zeroes to more i n - d ept h met r ic s coul d m a ke a l ea g ue seem more serious to i ts l oya l p a r t i c ipa nts. L oya l ty equa l s dollars, and t his tend o l l ar a p p co u ld hel p you reta i n bundles.

Wh at i S co re l a c ks, i Ref-Ki c kba l l m akes up in specificit y.

So met i m es a prog ra m a s a l l - encompassing as iS core can b e a l i tt l e to o m uc h, a nd that ’s where iRef-Kick ball takes a d va nta ge . M ade w i th the ga m e i n mind, iRef has a real stri p p e d d ow n i nter fa c e a nd i s tr u ly aimed at t he field mo n ito rs o f stat-ba sed l ea g ues. Fol l owing t he official rules o f th e n at i o n a l spor ts l ea g ue WAKA , scorekeeping is kept re l at ive ly s im p le w i th ba l l s, str i kes, out s, and fouls. Beyond iRef-Kickball th at, iS co re o u tper for m s i Ref on ever y ot her level. The abilit y to log teams is n o t as so p h i st i cate d as ESPN’s a pp, a s i t does not indiv idualize players instead relyin g o n ju st ove ral l team score. T he em a i l i ng funct ionalit y is not as robust eit her, but it was su rp r is i n g t h at i t wa s even i nc l uded in t he release.

I n th e e n d , if you a re a vol unteer monitor look ing for an easier way to keep track o f sco re a n d d o n ’t need the bel l s a nd whist les of iS core, iRef is an adequate opt io n at $0 . 99 . i Sco re - 5 o u t o f 5 i Ref- Ki c k b al l - 2 1/2 out of 5 25

T S LI ” G O N I “ Y L F HE T S TI V E B E S P OR T S F

C S DI

by M ic h a e l Votto Throughout t his art icle, I will be refer r in g to games as “team disc” or “fly ing d is c” games.

Due to t rademark rea s o n s , I cannot use t he vernacular t hat is o f te n att ributed to nearly all t hese games . Bu t if you need help remembering what t h es e “discs” look like, I highly recommen d yo u take a hard look at t he included grap h ic representat ion. That should help.

It is easy to stereot y pe who is t hrowin g fly ing discs around: long-haired, t yp ically t ie-dyed listeners of t he Grateful D ead w h o a re o n l y d oi ng i t beca use they l ost t heir favorite foot bag (honest ly, t his is a n o t h er tra d em ar k reas on - f rom the sa m e company ). Yes, it is an ex t remely simple act iv it y to p a r ta ke in w hi l e, say, wa i ti ng for Dave Matt hews to come out and jam at Bon n aro o .

B u t t h is ro u n d pl a sti c di sc ha s m or phed into somet hing of greater significance over t h e ye a rs .

Id e a s h ave b e en bor n, ga m es have been played, and money has been made. That is t h e s i gn o f a t r u e s por t i sn’t i t? T he tr ut h is t hat a basic fly ing disc has been ut ilize d to c reate s o me o f the m ost pl ayed ga m es in our nat ion’s histor y, and is also part of a n ew wave o f s p o r t- hybr i ds that coul d potent ially be t he nex t big t hing if given a big p u s h by l ea gu e o rgan i zers.

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5 . KANJAM We ’ve ment io n ed Ka nJa m wi thi n the pages o f th i s ma gaz i ne before, but w hen t his to p i c ca m e u p , severa l m em bers of our staff i m me d iatel y tur ned thei r attention to th i s u n i q u e take on f l yi ng di sc s. C onsist ing o f two te am s of two, the obj ec t of t he ga me i s to u s e tea mwor k to get the disc to co n n ec t w i t h t wo ca n- styl e goa l s. U nlike mo re t ra d i t i o n a l ga m es, you ca n score in th ree ways : by def l ec ti ng the f l yi ng disc i nto t h e s id e o f the goa l , hi tti ng i t on your ow n , a n d s la m mi ng the di sc down through th e to p o f t h e ca n. Ea c h have di fferent p o i nt val u es , and i t even ha s a n “ i nstant w i n ” move, w h i c h ha ppens w hen the disc g l i d es into t h e sm a l l sl ot on the f ront of th e go a l .

Th e gam e is r isi ng i n popul a r i ty, l eav ing th e co nf in e s o f col l ege ca m puses ( where mo st o f t h e s e spor ts seem to be born) a n d ma k i n g i t s way i nto the c hi l dhoods of ki d s aro u n d t h e countr y. T he ow ners of Ka n Ja m h ave moved c l ose to 15,000 kit s on th e i r webs ite , a s wel l a s contra c ted wit h sch o o l d ist r i c t s to i nc l ude the ga m e i n gy m cl a sse s . Wi t h the popul a r i ty of kick ball a n d d o d ge b a l l g rowi ng ever yday, t his is n o th i n g b u t a good si g n for a n up-andco m in g o bs c u re spor t.

4. Sc h t i c k D i s c Devel o p ed at Ri c e Uni versi ty i n the 1990’s, Schti c k D is c is a m odi f i ed versi on of t he mo re p o p u l a r f l yi ng di sc ga m e Ul timate.

Th e fo o t b a l l f iel d i s c ut dow n i nto t wo “ wo r l d s ,” eac h ow ned by one si de. Two “sco re b oxe s ” s it i n the exa c t m i ddle of th e se c irc les , a nd pl ayers m ust handle mu l ti p l e d is c s to score goa l s. T he big gest d ev i at i o n f ro m Ul ti m ate com es f rom t he a l l owa n c e o f p layers r unni ng whi l e holding th e d i s c , a b i g no-no i n the Ul ti m ate realm.

Th e a d d i t i o n o f ex tra di sc s a nd the abilit y to move w i t h t hem m a kes Sc hti c k a more ta cti ca l ga m e t ha n Ul ti m ate. When each

team is in possession of t he dis c, b o t h teams have to balance t heir offen s ive attack wit h a solid defensive presen ce.

Perhaps t he const ruct ion of t he gam e an d t he frant ic nat ure of it s play will always keep t his as a curiosit y, it is a fre s h take on Ult imate t hat adds a more high en e rgy element to it s already winning form u la.

3. D o d g e D i s c When you set out to int roduce a n ew sport , somet imes you have to borrow f ro m anot her. Heav ily. A nd in t he case o f D o d ge Disc, you just replace a ball wit h a d is c.

Born from t he minds of t he J a p an es e , t his game is simply dodgeball with f lyin g discs, and can be played in a mult i t u d e o f locat ions: beaches, gy ms, even larger s p o r t s complexes. A ll t he rules of dodgeb all are intact , but Dodge Disc seems to len d it s e lf more to final shootout s t han it s rub b er b all counterpart . The final batt le bet ween t wo indiv idual part icipant s can be excit in g , as each player attempt s to wield m u lt ip le discs in unison to secure v ictor y.

S urprisingly, t his game hasn’t cau ght o n much in t he United S tates, but it is st ill early in t he life of Dodge Disc. Play i n g wit h regular plast ic fly ing discs can b e q u ite dangerous in a sport like t his, bu t t h ere are official dodge discs which are mad e o u t of a compacted foam t hat doesn’t d e cre as e speed, while keeping t he players safe f ro m injur y.

2. D i s c G o l f The oldest game on t he list , Disc G o lf is a by-product of t he act ual invent ion o f t h e modern fly ing disc in t he early 1900 ’s . Th e passionate resurgence and prom in e n ce of t he game came in t he 1960’s , wh e n municipal parks began to install D is c G o lf courses in Ohio. The modern game o f D is c Golf resembles t he sport of golf alm o st ident ically wit h small changes to goals an d 27

co u rs e s et u p .

Th e co n st r u c t ion of the ga m e i s not as i nte rest in g a s the constr uc ti on of t he co u rs e s . I n o rder to have a tr ue- to-form Di s c G o lf co u rse, i t a l l sta r ts at the “tee p a d ,” a u s u a l l y conc rete pl atfor m where p l ayers can m ake thei r dr i ve. T he level su rfa c e al l ows t he pl ayer to i nc rea se t heir a c cu ra c y an d t hrow i ng power. At the end o f th e h o le , i n stea d of havi ng a di sc -sized re ce s s in t h e g round ( that woul d look ri d i c u lo u s ) , t h ere i s a pol e hol e m ade of meta l a n d c h ai n s ca l l ed “ the ba sket.” While th i s s ee ms l i ke a better opti on tha n tossing a d i s c i nto a hol e, tr yi ng to suc c es sfully “ p u tt ” into t h e ba sket i s a n a c qui red sk ill.

M o st co u rs e s a re found on pa r k land, b u t t h e re i s a g row i ng a m ount of private Di s c G o lf co urses poppi ng up around th e co u nt r y.

Its popul a r i ty i s said to h ave p e aked d u r i ng the ea r l y 2000’s, but ev i d e n c ed by t he i nc rea si ng num ber of Disc Go l f team s p o ppi ng up at uni versi ti es and th e p re s en c e of the Pro D i sc Gol f World C h a m p i o n s h i p , thi s spor t seem s l i ke it is h ere to stay.

1 . U lt i m at e C o me o n - yo u knew that thi s wa s going to b e n u mb er one. For those of you who a re u nfa m il i a r wi th the ga m e ( a nd w hoever yo u a re, fo r s h a m e!) , Ul ti m ate i s ba sically fo o tb a l l w it h o ut a l l that hi tti ng . O h, and i t i s p layed w i th a f l yi ng di sc . Whi le t he ru l es o f fo o t b al l a re wel l - known, Ul timate d ev i ate s in s m al l , but i m por ta nt ways. A

player cannot run wit h t he disc, as fo r ward movement can only be achieved w h en t h e disc is t hrown. The use of a reg u lat io n foot ball field remains t he standa rd , b u t t he game can be modified to accom m o d ate changes in venue, like beaches o r eve n st reet s.

Ult imate is t he most widely played o f t h e team disc sport s, wit h nat ional colle giate championships tak ing place ever y year since 1975. Ult imate clubs at co llege s and elsewhere are common acros s t h e United S tates, and internat ional play h as commenced wit h t he United K in gd o m jumping on t he bandwagon wit hin t h e last couple of decades. What has cem ente d Ult imate’s place in t he public psych e h as litt le to do wit h it s slow global grow t h and more to do wit h physical ed u cat io n programs ut ilizing t he game in t h e ir curriculum - somet hing t he upstart Kan J am disc game has recent ly accomplished .

I developed my love for Ult imate in gym class during high school, but it could n eve r t ruly flourish because t hrowing a d is c is somehow an un-learnable concept fo r my ex t remit ies. The best t hing about U lt im ate is t hat , even despite a handicap like m in e, you can make yourself useful som ewh e re on t he field. I was good at catchin g lo n g passes and complet ing short tosses , s o I k ind of t racked near t he endzone wait in g for a play to build. When an out-of-s h ap e, but compet it ive k id can be t he MV P o f t h eir Ult imate unit in school, you k now yo u are part icipat ing in a fairly special spor t .

Facebook group of the month: DISC DODGE

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by Jodi Neitzel

In a game of Fowling, or football bowling, two teams compete to knock down all of their opponent’s bowling pins using an NFL football. The game is played in singles or doubles and begins with a coin-toss. The winner has the option to take the first throw or call which Fowling lane they want to defend.

Teams stand on the same side and alternate throwing the ball at the other team’s pins, set up 48 feet apart in the standard 10-pin configuration. Play continues until one team has knocked down all ten pins, securing a frame victory. Official Fowling matches are a best of three frame series.

If the first team to throw knocks down all of the pins, an equalizer throw is awarded to allow the opposing team the opportunity to try to force overtime. If they succeed in knocking over all the pins, the frame is considered a tie and overtime begins.

Men throw from behind the back edge of their lane, which is called the throwing area. The imaginary line that extends along the back edge of the fowling lane is the foul line. A throw is legal as long as the ball is released from behind the foul line. The throwing area for women and children is behind the front edge of the Fowling lane.

Pins knocked over during regular game play are removed from the platform after all pin movement has stopped. This includes any pins that are knocked down as a result of environmental factors or influences outside of the game, including wind, wayward balls from other games and actions of the fans. Once a thrown ball has crossed the foul line, players are free to catch or deflect the ball to defend their pins.

Fo r m o re i nfo r m ati on, vi si t w w w.fowling.org

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FINAL WORD It Al l C omes O ut In The Wash

by Jod i Ne it zel As th ey ap p ro ac h the ba r, she eva l uates t he ent rance sit uat ion for any obstacles . I n o n e sw i ft , cal c u lated m ove, she pushes the door open wit h her elbow, enters and tu r n s to p ro p i t w i t h h er foot. Her f r i ends pass t hrough and make t heir way up t he stairs . Sh e tra i l s s l i g ht l y b ehi nd, payi ng ca ref ul attent ion to each step and resist ing t he u rge to g ra b t h e d i r t y ha ndra i l for ba l a nc e.

Th ey re a c h t h e top, enter Fr i day ni ght and eagerly signal t he man slinging drin ks .

Sh e p ays w i t h h er ca rd beca use she’s read too many stories about germ and co ca in e cove re d m oney to ha ndl e cash. A s she wait s, t he woman nex t to h er dec i d e s agai nst putti ng up the elbow shield and coughs direct ly i nto t h e p al m of her ha nd - w hi c h she t hen proceeds to drop into th e co m mu n i t y Petr i di sh of sa l ty snacks sitt ing on t he bar.

Si c k.

Sh e h ears h er f r i ends a c ross the bar before she sees th e m. T h ere’s an i ntense ga m e of beer pong going on a n d s h e ’s co m e prepa red to defend her t it le. S he ma kes h e r way over a nd ta kes her spot at t he ta b l e.

H e r op p o n ent t hrows the ba l l . It drops just sh o rt o f t h e c u ps a nd bounc es. She tr ies to catch it b u t i n stea d def l ec ts i t i nto t he wa l l . F ro m t h ere i t travel s to the nex t ta b l e over, ma kes a sm ooth a rc h to th e g ro u n d a n d sl ow l y rol l s throug h a p u d d l e o f b eer a nd col a to a stop at h er p a r t n e r ’s feet. As he bends d ow n to ret r ieve i t, she sca ns h er s u r ro u n d i n g s a nd sta r ts to fee l anx iet y take over.

An d t h en s h e spots i t… the p l a st i c c u p o f p la i n ta p water u sed to r in s e off ever y ba l l th at take s a s im i l a r j our ney.

Wh ew, w h at a rel i ef. T hat wa s a c l o s e o n e.

G a me o n !

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