2016-02-01 Outlook Ohio Magazine

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The Voice of Ohio’s LGBT and Ally Community

vol 20 • issue 9

february 2016 1

june 2015

Outlook Magazine: Celebrating 20 years!

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Outlook Magazine: Celebrating 20 years!

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Thanks to all our advertisers and readers for two decades of support! You rock!

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Outlook Magazine: Celebrating 20 years!

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Thanks to all our advertisers and readers for two decades of support! You rock!

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Outlook Magazine: Celebrating 20 years!

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vol 20 • #9

The Women’s Issue 7 8

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you are here

In the Spotlight

you are here

My partner loves to tell the story of when she came out to a coworker a few years ago.

feature: women leaders

After being asked a handful of times if she was bringing a boyfriend to their office Christmas party, my partner finally told her she was a lesbian. Without skipping a beat, her coworker replied, “Oh, cool! I love Ellen DeGeneres!”

qmunity briefs

feature: a black history month tribute to LGBT women

feature: lesbian 101

column: transpoint analysis column: in the shade

column: dyke like me

deep inside hollywood

creative class: Mapplethorpe revisted

bookmark: author Michelle DiCeglio

calendar: Columbus

calendar: Cleveland/Akron

calendar: Toledo

calendar: Dayton

calendar: Cincinnati savage love

divine life puzzling toons

about the cover: The cover, featuring 8 of Ohio’s LGBT Women Leaders, was drawn by Dominic Presutto.

Dommie is a graphic designer who occasionally pretends he still works for Outlook media. In his spare time he enjoys drawing, games, pod casting and using Oxford commas.

next month: The Hair Issue

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PUBLISHER Christopher Hayes

HEADQUARTERS Outlook Media, Inc. 815 N High St, Ste G, Columbus, OH 43215 614.268.8525 phone / 614.261.8200 fax

I was pleasantly surprised, however, with how poorly Stonewall was received. It grossed a fraction of what it cost to produce and is currently sitting at a rotten 9 percent rating on Rotten Tomatoes.

That speaks volumes to how our community is slowly working toward inclusion in the media. We’re tired of being misrepresented.

Besides Ellen, who seems to be the only gay woman many people have heard of, lesbians in the media have historically been hard to come by. The same goes for other women in our community, too.

(By the way, if you want to learn more about those aforementioned women leaders, go to Page 16 of this month’s issue. We feature 31 black LGBT women who have had a profound impact on our community and our world).

We’ve been the brunt of many jokes over the years, ranging from hurtful stereotypes to crude over-sexualization. We’ve had to settle for glorified soap operas like The L Word and poorly written secondary characters. We all remember Ross’ lesbian wife from the ’90s sitcom, Friends.

Representation even within our LGBT community also is still hard for us to find than white, cisgender gay men.

Having the first letter in the acronym doesn’t mean squat, apparently. And for trans women and women of color it’s even harder.

But we might be approaching a turning point for LGBT women in the media. Last year, a television network showed an on-screen relationship between two young bisexual women in a children’s cartoon for the first time ever. ABC Family now has a show about an interracial lesbian couple that fosters a handful of teenage children. Laverne Cox, a transgender actress of color, skyrocketed into stardom.

My friends and I saw the newest lesbian film, Carol, in January. Before it started we were bouncing in our seats like sci-fi buffs who hadn’t seen a good Star Wars movie since the 1980s.

Lesbian women are really desperate for good media. And we’re tired of waiting.

With so much recent progress, I was disappointed when the director of Stonewall, the recent pseudo-fictional retelling of one of the most important turning points in LGBT history, replaced our black women pioneers of the movement with a fictional white male.

ASSOCIATE PUBLISHERS Bob Vitale / Chad Frye

That’s why we wanted to do a Women’s Issue this year.

All of us at Outlook work hard every month to be inclusive of women’s issues, of gender, trans and race issues, and to reflect the diversity of our entire community in every issue. I think we do a good job of it.

But sometimes a portion of our community deserves our undivided attention.

It shows the world at large that we’re here, and we matter. It’s also the best way to learn about everyone in our diverse community - their nuances and the unique challenges they face - so we can work together.

SALES Chad Frye / cfrye@outlookmedia.com Mike Moffo / mike@outlookmedia.com NATIONAL ADVERTISING Rivendell Media - 212.242.6863 EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Bob Vitale / bvitale@outlookmedia.com MANAGING EDITOR Erin McCalla / erin@outlookmedia.com CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Jessica Campbell, Brooke Cartus, Debé, Erin McCalla, Tom Muzyka, Romeo San Vicente, Dan Savage, Debra Shade, Brynn Tannehill, Bob Vitale ART DIRECTOR Christopher Hayes / art@outlookmedia.com

CONTRIBUTING DESIGNERS/PHOTOGRAPHERS Jessica Campbell, Christopher Hayes, Jennie Key Photography, Sam Malone, Dominic Presutto COVER ARTIST Dominic Presutto CYBERSPACE outlookohio.com outlookmedia.com networkcolumbus.com twitter / fb: outlook ohio lovebigweddingexpo.com Outlook is published and distributed by Outlook Media Inc., on the first day of each month throughout Ohio.

Outlook is a free publication provided solely for the use of our readers. Any person who willfully or knowingly obtains or exerts unauthorized control over more than 5 copies of any issue of Outlook with the intent to prevent other individuals from reading it shall be considered guilty of the crime of theft. Violators will be prosecuted.

The views expressed in Outlook are those of the individual authors and do not necessarily reflect the views, policies, or personal, business, or professional practices of Outlook Media Inc., or its staff, ownership or management.

Outlook Media Inc., does not investigate or accept responsibility for claims made in any advertisement. Outlook Media Inc., assumes no responsibility for claims arising in connection with products and services advertised herein, nor for the content of, or reply to, any advertisement.

All material is copyrighted ©2016 Outlook Media Inc., All rights reserved.

puzzling solution - puzzle on pg 34

And it just feels good to stand under the spotlight every once in a while.

Jess Campbell

Assistant Designer

Don’t forget! Register to vote by Feb. 16 for Ohio’s March 15 primary election.

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RIP: Trans Writer, Ohio Native Bryn Kelly

A memorial service is planned in Brooklyn, N.Y., on Sunday, Feb. 7, for Bryn Kelly, a transgender writer and performer, former Lambda Literary fellow, and Ohio native who committed suicide on Jan. 13.

Transgender Artists You Should Know” in 2012.

“The trans community has lost a talented, intelligent and beautiful person,” wrote JAC Stringer, a trans activist from Cincinnati. “Bryn Kelly was an artist, a musician, a singer, an activist, a writer, a role model, a leader, a mentor, a friend... She cared strongly for others and was deeply loved by her communities.”

The service will take place on her birthday.

Kelly was born in the Lawrence County community of Waterloo near Ohio’s southern point, and she lived in Columbus before heading to New York. As a writer for Please contact the Trans Lifeline at 877.565.8860 or the Trevor Project at New York’s performance series, Gayety!, she 866.488.7386 if you’re considering suicide. was named by Huffington Post as one of “20

Gay Democrat Promoted in Akron, Punished in Columbus Akron Democrats promoted one openly gay official in January, while Columbus Democrats moved to oust another.

Summit County Sandra Kurt Council member Sandra Kurt was appointed as the county’s clerk of courts on Jan. 14 to replace Dan Horrigan, a Democrat who was elected mayor of Akron.

She’ll run for a four-year term as clerk this fall.

“I thank you for putting your faith in me,” Kurt said, according to the Akron Beacon Journal.

In Columbus, meanwhile, Franklin County Democrats withdrew their endorsement of

Recorder Terry Brown, who in 2012 became the first openly gay person elected to county office.

Brown endorsed Democratic Sheriff Terry Brown Zach Scott in the 2015 Columbus mayor’s race. Scott lost to fellow Democrat Andrew Ginther.

Democrats also withdrew their endorsements of Scott and Franklin County Commissioner Paula Brooks, who also endorsed him.

Summit Set for HIV-Positive Youth When healthcare professionals and nonprofit organizations reach out to young people on the topic of HIV, it’s usually aimed at preventing them from getting the virus.

combination of issues related to their age and HIV status,” Adrian Neil Jr., programs coordinator for the coalition, wrote in announcing this year’s event. “One of the goals for the summit is to prepare and empower But from Friday, Feb. 19, to Sunday, Feb. 21, HIV-positive young people from across the the Ohio AIDS Coalition will host its 10th an- state to advocate for themselves and their nual Positive Youth Leadership Summit, for communities.”

HIV-positive people ages 18-29.

People interested in attending the summit It’s three days of workshops on topics such (room and board are provided) must fill out as medical care, disclosure, advocacy, nutri- an application available online at tion, body image and more. It will take place ohioaidscoalition.org. They’re due by Friday, at the Holiday Inn Capitol Square in Colum- Feb. 12. Contact Neil at 800.226.5554 or bus. neilhobson@ohioaidscoalition.org if you have questions.

“HIV-positive young adults face a unique

Around Ohio

Cincinnati: Through Monday, Feb. 15, Cincinnati Pride is offering a 20 percent discount on registrations for the June 25 parade and festival. Visit cincinnatipride.org for forms.

Cincinnati: Proud Scholars, a new scholarship fund for LGBT students in the tri-state area, is seeking board members. Visit proudscholars.org for more info.

Columbus: Art for Life, the annual fundraiser for AIDS Resource Center Ohio, will move to the new modern-art wing of the Columbus Museum of Art this year. ARC Ohio also will partner with the Pizzuti Collection for the Sept. 24 event.

Ohio State University: More than a dozen scholarships for 2016-17 are available

to LGBTQ undergrads, and the deadline for some is March 1. Email Scarlet & Gay scholarship chair Brian Orefice @ orefice.1@osu.edu for information.

Youngstown: Organizers of Youngstown Pride have scheduled the annual LGBT celebration for Saturday, July 16. It’s a switch from the traditional June date of its first seven years.

Ginther and party leaders instead are backing a “unity ticket” of Democrats challenging Brown, Brooks and Scott in the March 15 primary. Ginther called the new ticket a representation of diversity, although it includes only one woman and no LGBT candidates.

We’re Loving It, Too! The Los Angeles Kings made National Hockey League history by ushering in the era of kisscam equality on Jan. 7. The NHL’s Columbus Blue Jackets will host an LGBT Pride Night on Saturday, April 9. Pucker up, just in case...

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The kiss-cam is about the only action at this year’s Blue Jackets games.

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How does this penis ring toss work, exactly?

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Outlook Magazine: Celebrating 20 years!

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feature

LEADING BY EXAMPLE

The Women Who Run Ohio’s LGBT Organizations Talk About Their Achievements, Who Inspires Them and Why Women Succeed

Women lead many of our LGBT groups in Ohio: community centers in Cleveland, Akron and Columbus; Pride festivals in Columbus, Toledo and Youngstown; PFLAG chapters; our statewide civil rights and anti-violence organizations, and more.

We asked a number of them to share some of their secrets: how they lead, whom they admire, the best advice they ever received.

We hope you learn as much from their answers as we did.

Julia Applegate

Which women characters are your favorites in books, TV or movies?

I’m a sucker for a good female detective, so I have to say Olivia Benson on Law and Order. I would also kill to meet Annie Lennox, Stevie Nicks, Tina Turner and Dolly Parton. I’m more into music than books, movies or TV.

LGBTQ Health Program Manager, Columbus Public Health

What’s your leadership style?

I am a collaborative leader at heart. I enjoy working in partnership, coalition-building, community engagement and other collaborative approaches to making change.

What’s the best advice you ever received?

The first thing that comes to mind was the advice my academic adviser gave me at Ohio University. I studied political science and was considering grad school. He told me that if I wanted to pursue a degree in the liberal arts that I should not pay for it. Look for a program that will pay you to go to school. That advice allowed me to leave grad school with no debt and the financial freedom to work as an activist.

What’s your proudest accomplishment at your organization?

Coordinating the efforts undertaken by the Greater Columbus LGBTQ Health Coalition to deliver the first Central Ohio LGBTQ Health Equity Conference that was held recently. The conference brought together activists, clinicians, academics, government organizations and LGBTQ community members for two days of dynamic speakers, presentations and workshops focused on reducing health disparities in our population.

Why do you think women lead so many of Ohio’s LGBT groups?

I think there are a host of reasons. Most of the women I know who do community-based leadership are passionate, feisty, committed, driven by a sense of urgency to make change, and less attached to big paychecks and fancy titles. There are ways to make a good living in LGBTQ community work, but they are few and far between and I think for better or worse, women are willing to work hard for less money than many men are.

Which women do you look up to?

I look up to women who have overcome difficult circumstances and have still managed to flourish. I always pull for the underdogs.

Which superhero power would help you most on the job?

I have always chosen time travel for my personal life, but in my job, I think being a mind reader would help more than anything.

How long have you been in your current position?

Just over three years.

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Merisa Bowers Co-Founder, Bi Local

How long have you been in your current position?

Bi Local was founded in 2013. It has developed organically based on what the co-founders have discovered to be the needs and interests of the bisexual+ community in Central Ohio.

What’s your leadership style?

“Holy-shit-how-do-we-get-this-done-beforethe-deadline-we-set-for-ourselves-while-allbalancing-full-time-jobs-and-personal-lives?!”

What’s your proudest accomplishment at your organization?

In the last year, I am extremely proud that we are starting to hear local LGBTQ organizations recognize bi+ identities and the need for bi+ representation in the work they’re doing.

Which women do you look up to?

There are so many amazing women leaders in my life! My mother and grandmother, both strong and driven, really set the bar high. I am extremely grateful for the mentors I’ve found in Columbus, including Chris Cozad and Heather G. Sowald, and I admire and appreciate the work and assistance of bi activists Heron Greenesmith at the Movement Advancement Project and Dr. Lauren Beach, a researcher at Vanderbilt University.

What’s the best advice you ever received?

Some of the best advice I received was, “No one emerges from the womb fully formed,” from former field director for Equality Ohio, Aliya Rahman. I think it underscores that we need to be kind but push ourselves and each other along the journey to compassion, justice and inclusion.

Which superhero power would help you most on the job?

I think we’re working on waving the magic wand to restore visibility to bi+ identities. Personally, I’d love the ability to be in more than one place at one time!

Tell us if we missed anyone! This won’t be the last time we spotlight women leaders.

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Rebecca K. Callahan

Executive Director, Community AIDS Network/ Akron Pride Initiative How long have you been in your current position? 2½ years.

What’s your leadership style?

My staff would describe my leadership style as a “no-nonsense” approach, fostering mutual respect and independent thinking. I believe in leading by example.

What’s your proudest accomplishment at your organization?

My proudest moment to date with CANAPI was the creation of the Teen Pride Network. In July of 2013, PFLAG Akron president Kim Mosyowski, Unitarian Universalist Church of Akron member Connie CookWagner and I met to discuss the needs of local LGBTQ teens. Out of this collaboration came the Teen Pride Network.

Which women do you look up to?

I look up to any woman who doesn’t fear sharing her passion, is intelligent enough to express it in a way that is inviting, and strong enough to not care if she is outside the norm.

Which women characters are your

Karla Rothan

favorites in books, TV or movies?

I enjoy a strong female character.

Egwene al’vere from Robert Jordan's Wheel of Time series is an example. She realizes that she can be her own amazing, stunning person, that she can have her own life that’s not dictated by anyone else and that she can choose her own direction. I am a huge epic fantasy junkie.

What’s the best advice you ever received?

Years ago, my father asked me what I was doing that weekend. I told him I would be at work, trying to get ahead of the workload. He replied, “OK, as long as you realize you are only creating memories. If those are the memories you want, you are doing the right thing.” In his memory, I try to be sure that I am creating a memory worth having.

Why do you think women lead so many of Ohio’s LGBT groups?

Whether it be nature or nurture, females seem to be uniquely suited for roles requiring collaboration and empathy which is not to imply that males are any less suited. LGBT groups, in their inherent diversity, are a natural fit for this type of person.

Which superhero power would help you most on the job?

CANAPI is a small organization with few but mighty staff. I would choose omnipresence, as I could make a larger impact on LGBT issues if I could be anywhere and everywhere at all times.

Executive Director, Stonewall Columbus

How long have you been in your position?

Nine years What’s your leadership style?

I would characterize my leadership style as “hands-on.” Last year both board and staff conducted planning sessions during retreats that resulted in the creation of a strategic plan.

Each team member sat down individually with me and developed a list of goals for the year that supported that plan. We have a rather small team so it is feasible to communicate with one another each week.

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Amy Eldridge

Executive Director, Kaleidoscope Youth Center How long have you been in your current position?

Over four years.

What’s your leadership style?

Servant Leader. My role is to serve the youth of KYC, our staff, volunteers, board and community. There is so much talent all around me. Sometimes it is to provide guidance and direction, to listen and support, and sometimes it is whatever I can do, including getting out of the way, to give others the opportunity to shine.

Jennie Key Photography

Which women do you look up to?

My daughter, a freshman at OU. My 87-year-old mother, who continues to grow and evolve in the most beautiful ways. KYC staffwimmin: some of the most amazing wimmin I have ever known. Friends who have pulled through the toughest of times to find themselves, full of gratitude and Love of Life.

Janet Mock. Maya Angelou, Alice Walker and Mary Oliver. Elizabeth Warren.

What’s your proudest accomplishment at your organization?

GROWTH. Team KYC has grown in every area in the last four years! Expecting more than four times the number of youth visits this academic year compared to 2012 (over 4,000 visits). Growth in youthled programming, and the amazing number of youth leaders contributing to this community.

Growth in parent involvement. In calls from caring family and community members asking how to support queer or questioning youth they know.

Which women characters are your favorites in books, TV or movies?

Celie and Sophia from The Color Purple, Galadriel from Lord of the Rings, Una from Ahab’s Wife, and Suzanne (“Crazy Eyes”) and Alex from Orange Is the New Black.

Growth in collaborations with other nonprofit organizations. From seven to 79 Gay-Straight Alliances in our GSA Network. Growth in the best staff team imaginable, a group of skilled and caring volunteers, the committed Board of Directors, and the amazing community members who support KYC with in-kind and financial contributions.

Why do you think women lead so many of Ohio’s LGBT groups?

Because of women’s propensity to take care of others and because we tend to lead smaller organizations and accept lower pay. (Women dominate smaller nonprofit leadership positions and men dominate higher paid, larger nonprofit leadership positions.) You know, sexism.

Communication is key to building a cohesive team.

What’s the best advice you ever received?

“To Thine Own Self Be True” - William Shakespeare.

“Do the next right thing, and let go of the outcome,” from a wonderful teacher.

be silenced and fought for her right to an education. Some of my greatest mentors have been my teachers, who in retrospect had such a proWhat’s your proudest accomplishment at your found influence on me. I still keep in contact organization? with several of my grade school, high school My proudest moment was in November 2010, and college teachers and they have become when we refinanced the loan on the property some of my best friends. that we purchased in 2004. We were able to Which women characnegotiate better terms ters are your favorites that have benefited the in books, TV or movies? organization tremenI usually like true stories dously, strengthening our of perseverance. I like to long-term stability. see characters who have been dealt a bad hand Which women do you and overcome great obstacles to succeed. look up to?

Malala Yousafzai comes to mind. She refused to What’s the best advice Karla, it’s bad luck to open an umbrella indoors!

you ever received, and from whom?

My partner Linda reminds me often that my best traits can be my worst taskmasters and that I should always strive for balance.

Why do you think women lead so many of Ohio’s LGBT groups?

Women make great leaders because they are traditionally brought up to be able to multitask, which is a very necessary skill for the job.

Which superhero power would help you most on the job?

On a weekly basis I would have to say Batman.

During Pride I would say, the Incredible Hulk because he’d set up and tear down the event in rapid speed, and I could buy all of the volunteers a beer so that they could sit there and watch him work! outlookohio.com

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Thanks to all our advertisers and readers for two decades of support! You rock!

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Come mix and mingle at Network Columbus, the second Wednesday of every month!

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Alana Jochum

Managing Director, Equality Ohio

Obama, who has done such a tremendous amount for youth nutrition and education for women across the world. And I look up to Ellen because someday, I’ll be able to dance. Really.

Which women characters are your favorites in books, TV or movies?

Well, I’ve got Star Wars fever right now like everybody else, so I’d have to go with Rey. What’s not to love? She can fix a ship and swing a light saber. But my all-time favorite character would How long have you been in your have to be C.J. Craig from the West Wing. Poise, brains and pocurrent position?

About six months in this role, but litical savvy - an amazing comI’ve been with Equality Ohio for bination. almost two years.

What’s the best advice you ever received?

What’s your leadership style?

I try to inspire and lead by exam- First, that control is a myth. Second, that the one thing we can ple. I work hard, and in turn, I control is our how we choose to am lucky to have a staff that gives their best every day. I focus respond to others. I have had a lot of strong mentors in my life, on the skills that each person brings with them to the job. I be- and this enduring advice has emerged from every one of them. lieve in maximizing a person’s existing talent - setting them up to succeed - which allows staff to bring their best selves to the job and feel safe to take risks, develop new opportunities, and learn new skills.

Why do you think women lead so many of Ohio’s LGBT groups?

Ohio has a wealth of talented, professional and capable women in the movement. I moved into this work from the What’s your proudest accom- private sector, driven by a pasplishment at your organization? sion for equality. Others have been forced to organize and work I am pleased that marriage for equality out of necessity - beequality generally unfolded cause of experiencing discrimismoothly here in Ohio. A lot of nation. I’m proud that so many hard behind-the-scenes work with partner organizations and women have followed their personal call to this work. our judiciary went into making that happen.

Which superhero power would help you most on the job?

What makes me most proud each day, though, is when I see I would be “Time Woman” so that I could successfully add anLGBTQ and allied Ohioans feel other eight hours in the day to empowered to share their stories, stand up for their rights get what I want done. And I would be “Unifying Legislature and become activists. It is thrilling. It motivates me to keep Woman” so I could single-handedly bring our legislators todoing the work. gether on a nondiscrimination law covering LGBTQ people.

Which women do you look up to?

I think there’s no hope for the I look up to the many women leaders in the Black Lives Matter first, but I’m working on the movement. I look up to Michelle second one. outlookohio.com

Phyllis (Seven) Harris Executive Director, LGBT Community Center of Greater Cleveland

How long have you been in your current position?

Three years, nine months

legacy of Cleveland’s Center.

Which women do you look up to?

My mom, Florence Dailey, and my former boss, Mary Brigid.

My mom believes in me and nurtured me to believe in myself. Mary Brigid also believed in me, created access for me in places where I could gain experience as a nonprofit manager and respected the perspective I brought to the work we did together as staff members.

What’s your leadership style?

I’m an affiliative leader in that I like the idea of folks being able to bring their authentic selves to work in order to be able to cultivate a sense of belonging and responsibility. I’m also big on supporting the growth of new leaders in the LGBT movement, so I will often employ a coaching style of leadership. I want to develop folks for the future and provide opportunities for them to build on their strengths.

Which women characters are your favorites in books, TV or movies?

I like Viola Davis, Angela Basset and Nurse Jackie.

What’s the best advice you ever received?

It has to be something from my mom.

My mom encourages me to take risks.

Every major move I have made as it relates to living my life the way I want, my mom has been supportive.

What’s your proudest accomplishment at your organization?

In 2014 we shared the news of two major donations. [One was the] largest donation in The Center’s nearly 40-year history: $1.8 million from an anonymous donor. The purpose of the donation is for The Center to purchase and renovate a new facility and increase staffing and program capacity. In addition, a new endowment fund has been created to provide for maintenance, upkeep and renovation of the facility.

Why do you think women lead so many of Ohio’s LGBT groups?

I think that women are socialized to do the work but that it is not a bad thing when the respect and recognition of the value of women’s contributions comes with it. I believe social justice, anti-oppression work requires the leadership styles and sensibilities that many women demonstrate. I think of it as a place of power.

The Milton and Tamar Maltz Family Foundation committed a $500,000 matching grant in support of funding the endowment. Combined, these two commitments total over $2.3 million in support of the long-term health, vitality and

Which superhero power would help you most on the job?

I wish I had Wonder Woman-type wristbands that I could use to ward off negativity and naysayers. They would also send a stinging zap to the offender anytime a micro-aggression is hurled within 10 feet of where I’m standing.

Lexi HaymanStaples Director, Toledo Pride, Pride419 and Collingwood Arts Center

How long have you been in your current position?

We started Toledo Pride in 2010.

spire me the most. I am so driven by the women who are lawyers, volunteers, full-time students, activists, artists and true friends who surround me on a weekly basis, and I aim to make them proud.

Which women characters are your favorites in books, TV or movies? Cher in If These Walls Could Talk, Angela in My So-Called Life, and Carol in The Walking Dead.

What’s your proudest accomplishment at your organization?

We have had six years of amazing success, and I have gotten to change and grow with the committee and events of Toledo Pride.

What’s the best advice you ever received?

My parents always told me to do what makes me happy, not what would make me money, and as it turns out...

I am very happy!

Which women do you look up to?

Those closest to me influence and in-

Why do you think women

Thanks to all of you (and Gloria McCauley!) for the work you do.

lead so many of Ohio’s LGBT groups?

Well, ’cause women are amazing!

Which superhero power would help you most on the job?

Being able to grow money as hair or having a double who would do whatever I said and go to meetings for me.

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Well, it’s not getting shortchanged this year.

We decided to do better than even a 29-day, leap-year February offers to highlight the achievements of LGBT African-Americans.

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SHEROES

A Month of They say it’s no coincidence that the shortest month of the year was the one set aside to honor black Americans.

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So in recognition of Black History Month and our first-ever Women’s Issue, we present 31 African-American lesbians, bisexual women and transgender women whose writing, singing, teaching, acting, empowering, leading, preaching, activism, athleticism and more have influenced our community, our nation and our world.

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Sharon Farmer 1951-

Ruth Ellis 1899-2000

Lorraine Hansberry 1930-1965

Jackie "Moms" Mabley 1894-1975

22

The Vaudeville veteran-turned-TV star was one of the first, most successful female comedians. She got her start in Cleveland.

28

The Queen of the Blues was mentored

by Ma Rainey and sold 800,000 copies of her first record, "Downhearted Blues."

29

The Emmy-winning comedian has appeared in more than three dozen movies and TV shows. She’ll perform at the State Theatre in Cleveland on March 19.

Bessie Smith Wanda Sykes 1892 (or 1894)-1937 1964-

21

The poet and journalist was an activist in the Civil Rights, feminist, anti-war and LGBT civil rights movements.

15

June Jordan 1936-2002

14

The dancer and activist spoke at the 1984 New York Pride festival: “I would like all my people to be free in this country and all over the world, my gay people and my black people.”

The 6-foot-8 first-round draft pick of the WNBA’s Phoenix Mercury equaled the league’s all-time slam-dunk record in her first pro game.

Sherry Harris 1965-

10

The Columbus native was one of three founders of the National Coalition of Black Gays, the nation's first organized voice for black gays and lesbians. It disbanded in 1986.

Darlene Garner 1948-

03

The cofounder of the National Black Justice Coalition has been an activist for social justice since the 1960s.

Mandy Carter 1948-

Wednesday

Jacqueline Woodson 1963-

01

02

The first black woman to win a Pulitzer Prize for fiction (The Color Purple, 1983) The Columbus native is a Caldecott, has written 34 books and poetry collecNewberry and National Book award tions. winner whose books for young adults tackle racism, LGBT issues and other sensitive topics.

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Alice Walker 1944-

23

The first black woman to be ordained as an Episcopal priest was a lawyer and civil-rights activist. She coined the term “Jane Crow” to refer to sexist policies in academia.

Pauli Murray 1910-1985

17

Since telling her story as a transgender woman in 2011, the journalist and author founded #GirlsLikeUs, a socialmedia project that empowers trans women.

Janet Mock 1984-

16

People told her not to run, but the Her 1959 work, A Raisin in the Sun, was the first play by an African-Ameri- Seattle resident challenged a 24-year incumbent and became the first can woman to open on Broadway.

African-American lesbian elected to a city council in 1991.

09

Mabel Hampton 1902-1989

08

Brittney Griner 1990-

07

The Ohio State University grad is a photojournalist who in 1999 became the first African-American and first woman to become the White House director of photography.

02

The namesake of a Detroit-area center for homeless LGBT youth lived to age 101. She and her partner turned their own home in the 1930s into a center for black gays and lesbians in Detroit.

01

The first science fiction writer to win a McArthur “Genius Grant” once told interviewer Charlie Rose: “Do I want to say something central about race?

Aside from, ‘Hey we’re here!’?”

Octavia Butler 1947-2006

The blues singer performed in the 1920s as a proud “bulldagger,” or butch lesbian, and was later harassed by police for wearing men’s clothes. In the 1950s, sadly, she claimed she had been “cured” of her homosexuality.

Gladys Bentley 1907-1960

Tuesday

Monday

The “Rosa Parks of the gay community” is said to have thrown the first punch at the 1969 Stonewall uprising.

She was a drag king who performed for four decades.

Stormé DeLarverie 1920-2014

Sunday

Angelina Weld Grimké 1880-1958

Robin Roberts 1960-

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27

The current mayor of Cambridge, Mass. (she also served a term in 200809), is the first African-American lesbian to lead a U.S. city.

www.outlookohio.com

26

The former sportscaster became host of ABC’s Good Morning America in 2005. In a 2012 interview with President Obama, he announced his support for marriage equality.

E. Denise Simmons 1951-

20

The U.S. representative from Texas, the first black woman elected to Congress from the South, gained fame as a critic of President Richard Nixon during the Watergate scandal.

Barbara Jordan 1936-1996

13

The poet, teacher and playwright was one of the nation’s first celebrated female African-American authors. She helped pave the way for the Harlem Renaissance.

Read new content daily at

The Mother of the Blues is in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in Cleveland. Her 1928 song, “Prove It on Me Blues” features the line: “Went out last night with a crowd of my friends. They must’ve been women, cause I don’t like no men.”

19 Ma Rainey 1886-1939

18

The veteran of the Stonewall uprising was a founder of Street Transvestite Action Revolutionaries and an early organizer in ACT-UP.

Marsha P. Johnson 1945-1992

12

The director of the Transgender GenderVariant Intersex Justice Project assists trans women of color who are disproportionately incarcerated. She was part of the Stonewall uprising.

06

Miss Major Griffin-Gracy 1940-

05

In the 1960s, Ronald Reagan sought to have the Counter Culture radical barred from teaching at any university in California. She now advocates for prison reform.

Angela Davis 1944-

Saturday

Since her rise to fame as Sophia on Orange Is the New Black, she has been nominated for an Emmy, appeared on the cover of Time and spoken to thousands across the country about transgender issues and acceptance.

Laverne Cox 1984-

Friday

The legendary jazz/blues vocalist and songwriter was a seminal influence in phrasing, tempo and style. Among her best-known works: “God Bless the Child.”

Billie Holiday 1915-1959

11

The writer who grew up in the Cincinnati suburb of Lincoln Heights and taught at OSU was called the Poet of the Black Revolution during the 1960s.

Nikki Giovanni 1943-

04

The Cleveland native has won four Grammys in her career as a singersongwriter. Her first No. 1 hit, “Fast Car,” was named by Rolling Stone was one of the best songs of all time.

Tracy Chapman 1964-

Thursday

February 2016 OUTLOOKfeb2016.pg16-17.qxp_OUTLOOK OHIO TEMPLATE 1/22/16 9:23 AM Page 2

lesbians 101 Outlook is proud to present this series for 2016 from the creators of Chaos Life (found monthly on our Toons page).

Lesbians 101 will school you on everything lesbian though the art and humor of the Columbus duo of A. Stiffler and K. Copeland. Study up... there’s a quiz (seriously) at the end of the year!

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february 2016

Look for the next Lesbians 101 in March!

outlookohio.com

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outlookohio.com

Thanks to all our advertisers and readers for two decades of support! You rock!

february 2016

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Nothing to Fear

transition point analysis

We’re All Hurt by Phobia of Femme, Feminine, Effeminate

by Brynn Tannehill

Someone once said that most people have just enough empathy to accept themselves.

Somehow, despite LGBT people being increasingly out of the closet, internalized homophobia and transphobia seem to be manifested by rejection of anything feminine, or “femmephobia.” It can be seen across the gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender communities, and all of them are harmed by this expression of misogyny.

The transgender community seems to absorb the brunt of the backlash, though.

Femmephobia is the fear and hatred of all people who are perceived as femme, feminine, effeminate, and/or twink regardless of their gender. A direct result of femmephobia is the oppression of anyone (male, female or anywhere in between) whose gender presentation is in any way classified as being on the female end of the gender binary due to their clothing, behavior or mannerisms.

One recent article summed up how femmephobia starts early and is deeply ingrained in our culture: “I can’t tell you the number of parents I’ve seen who think they’ve somehow failed at feminism because their daughters like lace and Barbie dolls; it’s much rarer to see the parent of a boy upset because his love of Batman and Star Wars doesn’t sufficiently challenge gender roles.”

More specific to the LGBT community: • In lesbian circles, femme invisibility can be a byproduct of femmephobia. There can be pressure to “butch it up” to bolster queer credentials. Lesbians with a femme gender expression often are assumed to be less radical, less feminist and more invested in sustaining the patriarchy. Some feel as if expressing their gender in a more stereotypically feminine way is seen as a form of pandering or makes their orientation viewed as “just a phase.”

But perhaps no segment of the LGBT community suffers from femmephobia more than transgender people. Transgender women overwhelmingly are the subject of violence directed at transgender people.

All 23 transgender people murdered in the United States in 2015 were transgender women.

Politically, historic vitriol toward transgender women has shut the trans community out of LGB priorities.

During a 2007 debate on whether to include gender identity in an earlier version of the federal Employment Non-Discrimination Act, then-Rep. Barney Frank reportedly screamed, “Never!” when asked if he would support inclusion in the bill he sponsored.

Former Human Rights Campaign Executive Director Elizabeth Birch said, “Over my dead body.”

Just last year, an internal HRC report found the organization’s culture was “rooted in a white, masculine orientation which is judgmental of all those who don’t fit that mold.” One staff member was even more blunt: “I see femophobia - feminine men and women are not considered as important.”

And socially, finding safety in queer women’s spaces has been difficult for transgender women, although not nearly as much for trans masculine individuals.

Transgender men, many of whom initially identified as lesbians, are often still accepted (or revered) in queer women’s spaces. One queer woman recently described the spectacle of a trans man holding court to an adoring crowd at a lesbian bar. Transgender women are often not welcome at all in such spaces, regardless of passability or surgical status.

Transgender women are frequently accused of caricaturizing women if they present as too femme, but they have their identities questioned if they present in a less femme way. As a result, transgender women often have no way of safely expressing their gender without it serving as a basis for rejection.

In the final analysis, femmephobia affects every segment of the LGBT community, and it doesn’t further the cause of equality. It divides us and sets us • Among gay men, singles ads for generations have against one another and diminishes the value of included the warning: “no fats, no fems.” Passing others in the community. as straight is valued, and being seen as effeminate in any way is viewed as an embarrassing stereotype. In a movement based on the concept of universal Being anything but 100 percent stereotypically mas- human worth, this is unacceptable. culine is viewed as weakness.

• Some bisexuals think bi erasure and femmephobia are very closely related. The link is that lesbians assume any bisexual, femme woman is actually straight.

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february 2016

Outlook awards Melt as the “Gayest Grilled Cheese.”

Brynn Tannehill is a former naval aviator and former Xenia resident who can be found on Twitter @BrynnTannehill. She writes a monthly column for Outlook. outlookohio.com

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in the shade

Our Savior

How Did Caitlyn Jenner Become Everyone’s Spokeswoman?

by Debra Shade

We could make a long list of areas like work, dating, family, religion, organizing, strategizing and leadership where women are fighting an uphill battle to overcome disparities with men. Did you need Caitlyn Jenner to tell you that?

In my lifetime, I have witnessed the struggle of women in the white-collared world. I truly believe the battle for women’s rights has been a distraction - or several - from the goal of equality. Women of color have their own plight; senior women, female teens and every other group of women seeking equality has its own specific needs for change.

Now women have to face the insurgence of another female group within our own plight.

Transgender women are joining the female voice for equality.

Which brings me to Caitlyn Jenner.

I am all for people being themselves, living their dreams and their truths each and every day. There is, however, much to consider when you opt to live your truth. You must think of others; most times, whom your actions will affect cannot just be washed away with the will of your acceptance of yourself.

Liberation.

We need freedom from the concept that even though we might face the same issues as humans, some do not matter unless they’re spoken for by someone who is white and rich.

Let’s look at how they talk about Caitlyn Jenner.

Typing in her name - announced just seven months ago - brings up more than 4.3 million hits, many of which deal with her hair, clothes, makeup and social life.

Google Laverne Cox. You remember her, right?

African-American transgender female who attempted to bring light to the transgender community and its abuse, deaths, neglect and shunning? You will find 1.7 million links to the life of Laverne, who is one of the few trans women in the entertainment industry.

Cox has been on the forefront of transgender issues for years. Her website speaks of trans issues, a documentary on a trans woman forced to spend time in the male prison system. She has links to resources for the community and her makeup and dresses do not supersede the lives that have come before her.

True transgender issues, focused on the people suffering from the abuse and neglect, are missing from the links and website of Jenner. It would appear from the outside that transition from male to female is as simple as learning how to use makeup.

What I got from all the hoopla was that if you are white and rich, you can make any issue a world issue. Why does it take the voice of someone rich and white to bring action and as- Why did we need a white transgender person to sistance to those in need? bring light to the black transgender lives lost?

Mainstream media reflect the transgender What pisses me off about Jenner is that the 17 community through Jenner’s transition as if million-plus folks who love and follow white women have not had the plight of being lessDiane Sawyer saw her interview Caitlyn Jenner. than in many areas. All of what has taken Then, Jenner suddenly becomes the face of place before seems to have been discovered transgender people. She’s suddenly the just now because of the savior, Caitlyn Jenner. spokesperson, the voice of the entire trans community.

Jenner hasn’t had the same experiences as most transgender women. She has had the It’s said that because of who Bruce Jenner was privilege of having enough money to avoid the and who Caitlyn Jenner is, she is the bestabuse, slander and hell that most people in her known transgender person in the world. How shoes have faced. does that respect the lives of so many lost souls? Whose same family members now watch Debra Shade is an author and owner of her in awe and admiration? How many of those Shade Media. You can find her on Faceadmirers shunned, abused or failed their own?

Transgender people did not - do not - need representation. They need what every class of people who are not white and rich need. outlookohio.com

book at Shadyontop or follow her on Twitter @shadeyontop. You can find her books at shademediallc.com, Amazon.com or Lion’s Den. Her next Outlook column will run in April.

Square One has salons in Dayton and Columbus.

february 2016

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dyke like me

Surviving February in Style Quick Tips to Make Valentine’s Day Painless

by Brooke Cartus

IT’S HERE! IT’S HERE! That stupid holiday that everyone hates and loves at the same time: Groundhog Day. Oh wait, that’s not the big February holiday you all are obsessing about? Mmmm. Weird. I love Punxsutawney Phil.

We all know what terrible holiday is looming, so let’s just skip the sh*t: It’s imminent, and you are going to have to deal with it. This year, I’m lucky enough to be with someone who is smart, sexy, fit and downright perfect for me. I’m not sure what she will plan for us, but I assume it will involve a candlelit purchase at the Northface store where I can pick out ANY leggings I want, followed by actual fish tacos (because lesbians love stereotypes and they also love delicious local Tex-Mex happy-hour deals.)

It’s hard for me to recall all of my past Valentine’s Days, because (spoiler alert!) I was a total nerd growing up. So I understand if you don’t take my advice. But even if you were WAY cooler than I was in high school (and you were all cooler than I was), you can still run with these tips and get the most out of this made-up holiday.

Tip #1: F*ck first.

This is my FAVORITE tip from Dan Savage, and if I could get away with a neck tattoo, it’s exactly what it would say. Do you have a fancy four-course Italian meal planned for your boo? Of course you do!

You know what NO ONE wants to do after eating a bunch of carbs and drinking all the merlot left in the bar? You guessed it: No one wants to f*ck. You don’t have the energy OR the range of motion. You look like your food baby is about to breach and you can barely bend down to reach the remote.

So f*ck first. Maybe it’s a quickie before you leave, maybe it’s in the restaurant bathroom while the server is making your drinks, whatever. Engaging in some intimacy before all the romantic bullsh*t does two things. First, it takes the pressure off feeling obligated to do the deed later. And second, is there anything better than post-sex glow with you and your partner? I didn’t think so. It’s the best.

Enjoy it. And lock the bathroom door.

Tip #2: Friends are really great. Go hang out with them.

One of my favorite Valentine’s Days in my dating life was four years ago. I had just gotten cheated on

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february 2016

Speaking of Tex-Mex happy hour deals... hello, Condado!

AND dumped, and my friends had been picking up the pieces of my shattered ego for about a week. My friend Bethany had been handling the brunt of my crazy and decided to get me out of the house and away from the mountain of pad thai containers that had been suspiciously piling up on my nightstand.

We walked to a bar in the Short North and she ordered me a beer. I’m not sure if it was because I had just showered for the first time in days or that the microbrew she handed me was filled with magic, but everything instantly started to feel better. I remember sitting there with her, talking about life and friends and beers and being surrounded by happy couples.

I thought to myself how lucky I was because I knew that it’s better to be single than to be with someone who isn’t right for you. It’s still one of my favorite Valentine’s Day celebrations, and it will be tough to beat.

Tip #3: Romance is what you want it to be.

Don’t let Punxsutawney Phil define it for you.

It has taken me 30 years to figure out what I want in a partner, and I am still figuring sh*t out. So far, all I’ve really figured out is that I like having sex before I go out for fancy dinners, and that I like scratch that - LOVE a woman in a tie. Swoon.

If your definition of romance doesn’t involve a candlelit dinner and tight clothes that make you feel like Catwoman, then don’t f*cking do it. Find your own romance.

For me, there is nothing better than when my girlfriend brings over coffee and breakfast on Sunday morning from our favorite local bakery and we finally have time to catch up about our week. God help us all if she shows up sometime with coffee and she is wearing a tie. I. Would. Just. Die. I would write more tips for you, readers, but I really don’t think you need them. You got this. Now, let’s get this goddamn month over so we can celebrate St. Patrick’s Day like assholes and forget about relationships and romance. Gross.

Brooke Cartus is a Chapstick lesbian with a law degree. You can find more of her writing on her blog, Size L for Lady, brookecartus.com. Look for her column, Dyke Like Me, every month in Outlook. outlookohio.com

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deep inside hollywood

by Romeo San Vicente

Heche, Silverstone Are Girlfriends in ÂCatfightÊ

ÂConversionÊ Nightmare Tackled in Documentary

Writer-director Onur Tukel just wrapped a lesbian brawl. It was for the filmmaker’s latest feature, Catfight, which stars Anne Heche, Sandra Oh and Alicia Silverstone.

You don’t have to have devoured all of Making a Murderer to know that injustice served to the powerless is a rage-making proposition.

Oh plays wealthy housewife Veronica Salt (hat-tip to Willy Wonka, obviously), whose lifelong rival, played by Heche, meets her again at a birthday party. The sparring begins.

And for all the progress enjoyed by the LGBT community in recent years, it’s still a scary world out there for too many queer people, especially young people.

They’re making a big deal out of the “intense” fight scenes, which is great, of course. And there’s also a plotline about war in the Middle East, even though we’re not quite sure how that fits into the Dynastystyle beatdowns.

Bottom line: Silverstone plays Heche’s girlfriend and we’ve loved her since Clueless and that’s pretty much enough for us to want to see this one. In post-production now, look for it at better LGBT film festivals before its proper release later in the year.

ItÊs Van SantÊs Turn to Tell LGBT History So Roland Emmerich’s Stonewall might not have gotten its history lesson across as effectively as planned. OK, fine, it was a disaster.

But now another LGBT narrative history project is in the works: the eight-hour ABC miniseries When We Rise, from director-producer Gus Van Sant. He’ll reunite with Milk screenwriter Dustin Lance Black for the series, which will cover the personal stories and political struggles of a large group of LGBT activists.

No word on the timespan the series will cover or if it’s going macro or micro. But because Stonewall’s failure hovers over it like a toowhite storm cloud, they’re already making sure that the press releases talk about its diversity.

And that’s good. No one project will be all things to all people, but setting the record un-straight involves listening to every kind of queer story. Cautiously optimistic on this one.

So here comes the infuriating documentary, Sick (Bolesno). The Croatian film from director Hrvoje Mabic tells the story of 16-yearold Ana, whose parents put her in an institution for five years to cure her of lesbianism. As a young adult, she is paranoid and depressed, involved in a relationship that might not be good for her, and suing her parents.

Harrowing stuff, to say the least, but still vital viewing for anyone who thinks marriage equality was the last battle. Look for Sick to make film festival rounds this year, and don’t be afraid to encounter its sadness.

ÂNight of the LotusÊ Is Saffron BurrowsÊ Next Its Golden Globe wins might be the first you heard of Mozart in the Jungle (it’s OK, there’s just too much TV to watch out there), but like us you’re probably binge-watching it right now on Amazon Prime.

Bisexual actor Saffron Burrows (married to Ellen writer Alison Balian) is one of the stars - her character will be having a secret affair with Gretchen Mol this season, so enjoy that - and she’s got another project upcoming with fellow queer actor Russell Tovey.

The indie feature is called Night of the Lotus. It’s from filmmaker Henry Mason and writer Thomas Martin, and it revolves around a young woman (Adelaide Clemens, The Great Gatsby) suffering guilt over the death of her new husband. She then lives out the honeymoon she never had with a stranger she meets on a train.

Look, you have to use the tickets or you lose them.

Romeo San Vicente’s wig-pulling days are behind him, but he was one of the best.

He can be reached at DeepInsideHollywood@qsyndicate.com. outlookohio.com

Congrats KYC on the new digs!

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february 2016

The Tansky ad is the only Valentine I’m going to get this year.

outlookohio.com

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creative class

Back in the Moment

Cincinnati Exhibit Revisits Mapplethorpe Uproar and Examines His Influence

by Bob Vitale The Cincinnati that people have worked so hard to put in the past is on display again at the city’s Contemporary Arts Center.

Twenty-five years after an exhibit of Robert Mapplethorpe photos called The Perfect Moment led to obscenity charges against the museum director and ignited the culture wars of the 1990s, a new exhibit examines its impact on artists and the city.

After the Moment: Reflections on Robert Mapplethorpe includes some of the late photographer’s images but focuses mostly on the work of artists from Ohio and surrounding states who felt his impact and inspiration.

Just as the 1990 exhibit exposed people to gay culture and Mapplethorpe’s work, the outdoor paintings “assimilate queer identity into hetero-normative environments,” he said.

Those who remember the uproar - either as Southwest Ohio residents in the middle of it all or outsiders who watched from afar - will think back to that uglier time. Those just learning about it will shake their heads at a display of critical and supportive letters mailed to the center during the exhibit’s run.

“BACK IN THE CLOSET HOMO BITCH,” reads one leaflet mailed in an envelope festooned with a frowny face, two bible passages and a warning of earthquakes headed Cincinnati’s way.

Anna Wu, Twenty-Three Years, 2014. Courtesy the artist and the Contemporary Arts Center

It’s on display through Sunday, March 13.

“We had a lot of debate internally about how to commemorate the Mapplethorpe exhibit,” said Steven Matijcio, who has been curator at the Contemporary Arts Center since 2013.

“Obviously, it was one of our defining moments.”

But instead of a Mapplethorpe-centric display, viewers instead will see how his influence has rippled out to today. Mapplethorpe, who died of AIDS in 1989 at age 42, photographed subjects from New York’s underground BDSM scene to male and female nudes, to celebrities and flowers.

It wasn’t the celebrities and flowers that made him controversial.

“Mapplethorpe’s work affected me because he exposed and presented a queer world [with] which I was curious as well as familiar ... and it at the time showed me that making work with gay themes was OK and that being myself was important,” said Matthew Dayler, an assistant professor at the Art Academy of Cincinnati who was a high school student in Hamilton, Ontario, during the 1990 exhibit.

For the new Mapplethorpe exhibit, Dayler created three outdoor paintings (a collage/map inside the exhibit points out their locations) that depict men embracing or just posing shirtless. outlookohio.com

A message from Al Gerhardstein, the Cincinnati lawyer who won the 2015 U.S. Supreme Court case that brought nationwide marriage equality, is among those supporting the museum.

“Stay strong,” he concluded.

The Contemporary Arts Center and then-Director Dennis Barrie were quickly acquitted of obscenity charges in October 1990, but they are believed to be the first criminal trial of an art museum over what it chose to display.

Katy Rucker, Untitled, 2015. Courtesy the artist and the Contemporary Arts Center

Mark Sawrie, Lily, 2015. Courtesy the artist and the Contemporary Arts Center

Mark Harris, Untitled, 2015. Courtesy the artist and the Contemporary Arts Center

Sheida Soleimani, Administrator, 2015. Courtesy the artist and the Contemporary Arts Center

Todd Pavlisko, who was a 16-year-old high school student in Oxford at the time, wasn’t allowed in the Mapplethorpe exhibit in 1990.

He’s part of it now.

His photo of H. Louis Sirkin, the Cincinnati lawyer who defended Barrie and the museum, ensures a moment in the spotlight for someone Pavlisko says “quietly fought for our right to make up our own minds.”

“I don’t think the images even then were controversial,” he said. “They’re actually so beautiful.”

After the Moment: Reflections on Robert Mapplethorpe

Bob Vitale is Outlook’s editor-inchief. You can follow him on Twitter @Bob_Vitale or email him at bvitale@outlookmedia.com.

Contemporary Arts Center 44 E. 6th St, Cincinnati, 45202 513.345.8400

Fun fact: Mapplethorpe and rocker Patti Smith were best friends and roommates.

contemporaryartscenter.org Open: Wednesdays-Fridays, 10a-9p; Saturdays-Mondays, 10a-4p.

Admission: $7.50 ($5.50 for seniors and students); free on Wednesdays from 5p-9p february 2016

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By the Book

bookmark

by Tom Muzyka

A woman found dead, alone in a park. The latest victim in a spree of killings, leaving a trail of bodies for Detective Lacey Mills to follow.

Is this a scene from a Lifetime film? No, it’s the start of a suspenseful plot to Columbus author Michelle DiCeglio’s Sight Lines (Amazon digital book, $6.99). The story moves us past the yellow tape of Hollywood crime dramas and into a more realistic chase of a small-town serial killer. And as the detective closes in on the culprit, her relationship with a seductive female suspect jeopardizes everything.

Columbus Writer Puts Education & Experience Into Detective Novel

tention Center for four years as a corrections officer. My primary duties were to maintain security in the housing units, respond to fights and medical codes, supervise the youths, and escort the youths to various activities in and outside the building.

Most crime shows do not accurately portray police procedure. My wife does a great job of putting up with me when I yell at the television, “You can’t do that in real life!” when, let’s say, a detective on Law & Order taste-tests the white powder to see if it’s really cocaine.

I spoke with DiCeglio about the book and her experience working in the justice system.

full of serial killers or that Columbus is a likely place for a serial killer to call home. What I am saying is that a serial killer can be anywhere. It’s about the person, not the town.

You’re not a serial killer because of where you live but because of who you are.

TM: The protagonist in your book - a police detective - ends up being involved with a woman who has a shady connection to the murder cases. In real life, what are the ethics and consequences of law enforcement being romantically involved with a suspect?

MD: Being romantically involved with a suspect vs. a guilty party are two completely different scenarios.

called “downing a duck,” which means that an inmate has manipulated a corrections officer. A recent example would be the two inmates in New York who manipulated a female guard into smuggling in tools to assist in their escape. Downing a duck doesn’t happen overnight. It takes months, even years, for an inmate to butter up a corrections officer and gain his or her trust.

While I wouldn’t recommend being romantically involved with a suspect, there is no law that outright forbids it. Ethically, however, your supervisor would advise against it.

TM: The protagonist’s relationship with her girlfriend escalates after a trip to the gun range. Is firing a gun a good aphrodisiac?

Have you found a favorite gun for foreplay?

MD: Firing a gun does give you an adrenaline rush. But a gun range is a controlled environment with safety precautions and regulations.

TM: The setting of the book - Lyons, Ohio - is a Tom Muzyka: There are a lot of details in the small college town book about police procedure and crime in- where it’s hard to go to vestigations. Can you tell me about your ex- the grocery store withperience studying criminology and working out running into someone you know. Did you in the justice system? How accurate are base the town off a specific city in Ohio? crime shows and novels to real life?

MD: I wrote Sight Lines with Columbus in Michelle DiCeglio: My experience in criminal mind. And Vantage Woods, which is the state justice started at the University of Akron. I park in Sight Lines where most of the victims earned an associate’s degree in criminal jus- are found, is similar to Alum Creek. Geotice, then transferred to The Ohio State Unigraphically, Lyons is located exactly where versity for my bachelor’s degree in criminology Columbus is on the map, and the population after I moved to Columbus in 2003. of Lyons reminds me of the Clintonville area.

As for your second question, I don’t actually A person in law enforcement being in a roown a gun. But guns are not toys. I cannot mantic relationship with a guilty party or an emphasize that enough. Handcuffs, on the inmate is completely illegal, and rightfully so. other hand...

While it makes for great television - [cough] Orange Is the New Black [cough] - a correcTom Muzyka is a native Ohioan, but took some time to find himtions officer should never be more than self in New York and Europe. friendly to an inmate. And there’s a fine line Now he finds himself mostly on between being “friendly” and being “friends.” adultcatfinder.com. If you are a

I worked at the Franklin County Juvenile De-

There’s a saying in the corrections world

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february 2016

Of course, I’m not saying that Columbus is

You can read more about Michelle DiCeglio at michellediceglio.com.

sexy, single cat, email him at tom.muzyka@yahoo.com.

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Out & About in

Central Ohio

Gay Men’s Chorus • Virginia West • Tennis • Condoms

MONDAY, FEBRUARY 1 Exhibit: Go Figure @ Ohio Arts Council Riffe Gallery, 77 S. High St., Columbus, 43215; 614.644.9624; riffegallery.org: Thirteen Ohio artists explore the human form as a narrative vessel, from surreal to hyper-real.

10a-6p. The exhibit runs through Wednesday, March 23; the gallery is open every day except Mondays and state holidays.

THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 4 Die, Mommie, Die @ Short North Stage, Garden Theater, 1187 N. High St., Columbus, 43201; 614.725.4042; shortnorthstage.org: Drag artist Charles Busch’s satirical melodrama about an aging Hollywood star and her twisted family relationships. Think Mommie Dearest with more camp... if that’s even possible. 8p; $25-$30. Performances run Thursday-Sunday through Feb. 21.

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 5 David Bowie Tribute @ Big Room Bar, 1036 S. Front St., Columbus, 43206; 614.449.9612; bigroombar.com: Central Ohio bands play the music of the late performer.

All proceeds benefit the James Cancer Hospital at OSU. 6p; $5.

Queer Hollywood/Intersecting Identities: Bessie @ Ohio University LGBT Center, 354 Baker Center, Athens, 45701; 740.593.0239; ohio.edu/lgbt: Bessie is the story of legendary blues performer Bessie Smith, who rose to fame during the 1920s. The movie stars Queen Latifah. 4p.

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 6 Babes of Glam Rock @ Bossy Grrl’s Pin Up Joint, 2598 N. High St., Columbus, 43202; 614.725.5402; bossygrrlspinupjoint.com: This burlesque show featuring Pittsburgh’s Just Jingles and Columbus’ Velvet Hearts will showcase the legends of glam rock. 9:30p; $5. outlookohio.com

TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 9 Comedian Julie Goldman @ Ohio University Baker Center Theater, Athens, 45701; 740.593.0239; ohio.edu/lgbt: The lesbian comic, who hosts The People’s Couch on Bravo, will perform free for OU students. 7p.

$80. More performances are scheduled for Feb. 13, 14, 19 and 21 at 8p, as well as Feb. 20 at 5p and 9p.

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 13 Lesbian Tennis Mixer @ Olympic Indoor Tennis Club, 3480 Indianola Ave., Columbus, 43214; 614.299.7764; stonewallcolumbus.org: There are only 16 spots available for the WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 10 Stonewall Columbus-sponsored Six Words @ Arts and College doubles event, so register ASAP Preparatory Academy, 4401 Hilton online. 4p-6p; $10.

Corporate Dr., Columbus, 43232; 614.986.9974; artcollegeprep.org: PolyColumbus Valentine’s Day Students perform their memoirs Dance @ The Columbus Space in only six words in music, dance, for Alternative Expression improv and spoken word. 6:30p. 180 Outerbelt St., Columbus, 43213; FB: PolyColumbus: If Mothers and Sons @ Studio One, you’re polyamorous, poly-curious Riffe Center, 77 S. High St., or poly-friendly, you’re invited to Columbus, 43215; 614.469.0939; the dance/fundraiser for the local catco.org: The drama about a group and the National Coalition mother’s love and anger about for Sexual Freedom. The theme: her dead son’s lover starting a Dancing Cheek to Cheek to new life was written by Pulitzer Cheek. 8p-midnight; $15 (or $10 Prize-winner Terrence McNally. in advance).

11a; $17-$40. Performances run Wed-Sun through Feb. 28.

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 17 Condom Couture @ ShadowboxLive, 503 S. Front St., ColumFRIDAY, FEBRUARY 12 Rock Out! Vox on the Rocks @ bus, 43215; 800.230.7526; FB: Fort Hayes Performing Arts Cen- Condom Couture 2016: Do you ter, 540 Jack Gibbs Blvd., Colum- stand with Planned Parenthood? bus, 43215; 614.228.2462; Then attend its annual columbusgaymenschorus.com: fundraiser/fashion show of garThe Columbus Gay Men’s Chorus ments made of condoms. 7p; select ensemble, Vox, performs a $50-$350. selection of rock classics. 8p; $25. There are two more perform- FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 19 ances, at 2p and 8p on Saturday, Positive Youth Leadership SumFeb. 13. mit @ Holiday Inn Capitol Square, 175 E. Town St., ColumGeneration West @ Axis, 775 N. bus, 43215; 800.226.5554; High St., Columbus, 43215; ohioaidscoalition.org: The Ohio 614.291.4008; axisonhigh.com: AIDS Coalition hosts its 10th anVirginia West visits the ’90s, nual two-day retreat and workalong with Nina West, Coti shop for HIV-positive Ohioans Collins, Krystal Something Some- ages 18-29. Applications are due thing, Indica, Amanda Sue, Gretta by Friday, Feb. 12 for the threeGoodbottom, Plenty O’Smiles, day event. (See Page 8 for more Freesia Balls, Jamz Dean, Candi information.)

Panties, Anita Snatch, Maria Garrison, Barbie Roberts and the SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 20 West Family Dancers. 8p; $14LGBT Hiking Club @ Glacier

Ridge Metro Park, 9801 Hyland-Croy Rd., Plain City, 43064; 614.299.7764; stonewallcolumbus.org: The Stonewall Columbus group’s monthly hikes are for people of all fitness levels. The Marsh Hawk Trail at Glacier Ridge is paved and dog-friendly.

10:30a.

Remo’s Reunion @ The Toolbox, 744 Frebis Ave., Columbus, 43206; 614.670.8113; FB: The Toolbox Saloon: It’s the fourth annual gathering for people used to work and play at Remo’s, a former gay bar on S. High Street. 2p.

Welcome, Exile!

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 21 Gay for Good Cookie Baking @ Ronald McDonald House Charities of Central Ohio, 711 E. Livingston Ave., Columbus, 43205; FB: Gay for Good Columbus, OH: The LGBT service group plans to warm the hearts of Ronald McDonald House guests with sweet treats. 2p-4p.

THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 25 Johnny Guitar @ Wexner Center for the Arts, 1871 N. High St., 614.292.3535; wexarts.org: A genre-bending

western that pits strong-willed Joan Crawford against Mercedes McCambridge - who were also rivals offscreen. 7p; $6$8.

FRIDAY, FEBRURARY 26 The Kacey Musgraves Country & Western Rhinestone Revue @ Lifestyles Community Pavilion, 405 Neil Ave, Columbus, 43215; 614.461.5483; promowestlive.com: While this country sweetheart is not a lesbian, she wrote her equal rights anthem “Follow Your Arrow” with LGBT community members Shane McAnally and Brandy Clarke. 6:30p; $28-$32.

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Out & About Out in & About in

Northeast Ohio

Bowie Tribute • Drag Brunch • Transdudes: The Musical

THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 4 Wynonna @ Hard Rock Rocksino, 10777 Northfield Rd., Northfield, 44067; 330.908.7625; hrrocksinonorthfieldpark.com: Wynonna Judd, daughter of Naomi and sister of Ashley, is on the road with her band, The Big Noise. 7:30p; $29.50-$57.50.

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 6 Contemporary Artists Lecture: Zanele Muholi @ Cleveland Museum of Art Recital Hall, 11150 East Blvd., Cleveland, 44106; 216.421.7350; clevelandart.org: Through photography, installation and video, Muholi records the lives of black lesbian women in South Africa. She brings into focus the love, intimacy and daily life within a close-knit yet vulnerable community in a nation plagued by hate crimes against LGBTI people. 2p; free, but registration is recommended.

North Coast Men’s Chorus Mardi Gras Celebration @ Windows on the River, 2000 Sycamore St., Cleveland, 44113; 216.556.0590; ncmchorus.org: The night includes Bourbon Street cuisine, a performance by the chorus, a silent auction and more.

6:30p-11p; $55 (tables start at $600).

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 7 We3Queens Drag Brunch @ Bounce, 2814 Detroit Ave., Cleveland, 44113; 216.696.0831; FB: Bounce Nightclub Hinge Lounge: Aggy Dune, Darienne Lake and Mrs. Kasha Davis host. Brunch will be made-toorder and include an endless mimosa, bloody mary and screwdriver bar. 1p; $30.

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 10 Movie: A Sinner in Mecca @ Cleveland Museum of Art Lecture Hall, 11150 East Blvd., Cleveland, 44106; 216.421.7350; clevelandart.org: Gay, Muslim filmmaker Parvez Sharma’s 2015 documentary records his pilgrimage to Mecca in defiance of Saudi Arabia’s ban on filmmaking and homosexuality. 7p; $11. There’s another screening on Friday, Feb. 12, at 7p.

THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 11 Victorian Valentine LGBT Social @ Summit County Historical Society Old Stone Mansion, 550 Copley Rd., Akron, 44320; 330.867.3388; jfsakron.org: Jewish Family Service of Akron hosts a Valentine’s social that includes champagne, wine, appetizers and a presentation on Victorian valentines. 5:30p-7p; $10.

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FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 12 Case Western University Drag Ball @ Tinkham february 2016

RIP Ziggy Stardust.

Veale University Center Ballroom, 11038 Bellflower Rd., Cleveland, 44106; FB: Spectrum at CWRU: Case Western students perform, but it’s open to all. This year’s special guest is Lady J. Martinez O’Neal, the Austin International Drag Festival ambassador. 8p.

David Bowie Memorial Show @ Beachland Ballroom and Tavern, 15711 Waterloo Rd., Cleveland, 44110; 216.383.1124; beachlandballroom.com: Local bands will perform in tribute to the late musician. 8:30p; $10 ($7 in advance).

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 14 2016 International Film Series @ Baldwin Wallace University Marting Hall, Room 114, Berea, 44017; 440.826.2246; bw.edu/events/2016/international-film-series: Among the short films on this night’s marquee are gay-themed Trémulo (Mexico, 20 minutes) and Acieto (Brazil, 20 minutes). 2p.

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 19 ArtCares Jr. @ 78th Street Studios, 1300 W. 78th St., Cleveland, 44102; 216.357.3131; aidstaskforce.org: The younger cousin of ArtCares features the work of artists ages 3-14. They’ll be auctioned off to raise money for the AIDS Task Force of Greater Cleveland. 5p.

Transdudes: The Musical @ Oberlin College Little Theater (Hall Auditorium Annex), 67 N. Main St., Oberlin, 44074; 440.775.8169; calendar.oberlin.edu: Oberlin senior Tae Braun, who conceived and directs this entry in the college’s New Works Festival, calls it “a fresh, contemporary comedy about gender, sexuality, hormones and privilege.” 8p; $5. Performances also are scheduled on Saturday, Feb. 20, at 8p; and Sunday, Feb. 21, at 2p.

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 20 Swimming in Dark Waters: Other Voices of the American Experience @ Oberlin College Finney Chapel, 90 N. Professor St., Oberlin, 44074; 440.775.8169; calendar.oberlin.edu: Rhiannon Giddens, Bhi Bhiman and Leyla McCalla explore old and new songs of resistance from the South. 8p; free, but tickets are required.

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 26 Symposium: Mary Church Terrell’s Legacy for 21st Century Activists @ Oberlin College, 173 W. Lorain St., Oberlin, 44074; calendar.oberlin.edu: The free, two-day symposium celebrates the life of the 1884 Oberlin grad who was a feminist and civil-rights activist. It also will examine social justice movements of today. 4:30p, continuing Saturday at 10a. outlookohio.com

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Out & About in

Northwest Ohio Hello, Dolly! • 42nd Street • Vagina Monologues

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 5 Fim Screening: Spartacus @ Valentine Theatre, 410 Adams St., Toledo, 43604; 614.242.2787; valentinetheatre.com: An Academy Award-winning film with Kirk Douglas and Tony Curtis in short togas. 7:30p; $5.

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 6 Hello, Dolly! @ Valentine Theatre, 410 Adams St., Toledo, 43604; 614.242.2787; valentinetheatre.com: Babs plays Dolly Levi, a socialite-turnedmatchmaker in the musical romantic comedy.

7:30p; $5.

7p. There’s another performance on Saturday, Feb. 13 at 7p SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 13 Single and Bitter Valentine’s Party @ Bretz, 2012 Adams St., Toledo, 43604; 419.243.1900; FB: Bretz Nightclub: Now, now, why be bitter? Just because EVERYONE OUT THERE LIES AND CHEATS AND CAN’T RETURN A TEXT MESSAGE????! Izaya Cole is the special guest, and performers include Brook Lockhart, Thunderpussy and Deja D. Dellataro.

miliar Bee Gees hits like, “You Should Be Dancing,” “Night Fever” and “Stayin’ Alive.” 7:30p; $48-$78.

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 19 A Streetcar Named Desire @ Valentine Theatre, 410 Adams St., Toledo, 43604; 614.242.2787; valentinetheatre.com: Marlon Brando has never looked so fine as he did TUESDAY, FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 12 in the film adaptation of The Vagina Monologues @ FEBRUARY 16 Saturday Night Fever, Tennessee Williams’ Pulitzer University of Toledo Driscoll The Musical @ Valentine Award-winning play. 7:30p; $5.

Alumni Center Auditorium, Theatre, 410 Adams St., Toledo, 43606; Lillian.OstranToledo, 43604; 614.242.2787; der@rockets.utoledo.edu: This presenTHURSDAY, FEBRUARY 25 valentinetheatre.com: A musical version of the PFLAG Toledo Support Meeting @ Park tation of Eve Ensler’s play is part of a movement to address violence against women. 1970s film of the same name with all the fa- Church, 1456 Harvard Blvd., Toledo, 43614;

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And hello to Dolly Vitale, too!

pflagtoledo.org: The group for parents, friends, family and allies meets on the fourth Thursday of every month. 7p.

42nd Street @ Stranahan Theater, 4645 Heatherdowns Blvd, Toledo, 43614; 419.381.8851; stranahantheater.org: A plucky small-town dreamer strives to make it on Broadway in one of the longest running musicals that includes songs like “Lullaby of Broadway” and “We’re in the Money.” The show runs through Feb. 28. 7:30p; $28-$88.

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Out & About in

Western Ohio

Glass Menagerie • LGBT Wedding Expo • Bowling

THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 4 The Glass Menagerie @ Loft Theatre, The Human Race Theatre Company, 126 N. Main St., Dayton, 45402; 937.228.3630; humanracetheatre.org: A Tennessee Williams play about a fragile Southern family on edge. 8p; $32-$40. Shows run though Feb. 21.

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 14 Love Big Wedding Expo @ Crowne Plaza Dayton, 33 E. 5th St., Dayton, 45402; 614-5728678; FB: Love Big Wedding Expo: Every business at the Outlooksponsored wedding expo supports marriage equality, so you don’t have to worry about any Kim Davises in the mix. 11a-2p.

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 6 Rainbow Club @ Always Ballroom Dance Studio, 552 Wilmington Ave., Dayton, 45420; 937.256.2626; alwaysballroom.com: This monthly ballroom dance event for the LGBT community began in January. It will take place on the first Saturday of every month.

8p; $15.

TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 16 Transgender/Allies Support Group @ Miami Valley Fair Housing Office, 505 Riverside Dr., Dayton, 45405; gatlyndamegroup.com: The group is for transgender, gender non-conforming people and their allies.

7p.

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 10 Drag Queen Bingo @ MJ’s on Jefferson, 20 N. Jefferson St., Dayton, 45402; 937.223.3259; mjsonjefferson.com: National Holiday hosts. It’s free to play. 11p.

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 13 Women’s Valentine’s Dance @ the Dayton Woman’s Club, 225 N. Ludlow St., Dayton, 45402; 937.274.1776; daytonlgbtcenter.org: The annual dance includes crowning of a princess and queen (vote at the Greater Dayton LGBT Center’s Facebook page). 7p; $15 ($10 for LGBT Center members).

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february 2016

We look forward to spending Valentine’s Day with you!

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 21 Miss Dayton Big and Beautiful @ Club Masque, 20 N. Jefferson St., Dayton, 45402; 937.228.2582; clubmasque.com: The gems of the Gem City compete in interview, swimwear/sportswear, gown and talent. 10p.

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 27 Bowling for Pride @ Poelking Lanes, 1403 Wilmington Ave., Dayton, 45420; 937.274.1776; daytonlgbtcenter.org: It’s the ninth annual fundraiser for the Greater Dayton LGBT Center.

Games include bingo bowl and garbage bowl. 2p; $20.

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Out &Out About & in About in

Southwest Ohio Barry Manilow • Big Bird and Maria • QueerCon 2016

TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 2 Film Screening: An Act of Love @ Cinemark Oakley, 3025 Disney St., Cincinnati, 45209; 513.961.2998; cliftonumc.com: Clifton United Methodist Church, a progressive and LGBT-welcoming congregation, is sponsoring this screening. The documentary follows the Rev. Frank Schaefer as he was put on trial in the United Methodist Church for officiating his son’s 2013 same-sex wedding.

6:30p; $11.

THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 18 Cocktails for a Cause @ Tillie’s Lounge, 4042 Hamilton Ave., Cincinnati, 45223; isqccbe.org: Guest bartender Brooklyn Steele-Tate will sling drinks for charity. Tip her well! 6p-10p.

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 5 The Revolutionists @ Thompson Shelterhouse, 962 Mt. Adams Circle, Cincinnati, 45202; 513.421.3888; cincyplay.com: Four women - including Marie Antoinette - hang out and plot murder in a comedy set during the French Revolution. The show runs through March 5. 8p; $30$65.

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 20 Daubigny, Monet, Van Gogh: Impressions of Landscape @ Taft Museum of Art, 314 Pike St., Cincinnati, 45202; 513.241.0343; taftmuseum.org: Over 50 impressionist landscapes from Charles-Francois Daubigny, Vincent Van Gogh, Claude Monet and Camille Pissarro will be on display through May 29. 11a-5p; $10-$15.

THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 11 Film Screening: Bessie @ University of Cincinnati LGBTQ Center, 565 Steger Student Life, Cincinnati, 45221: Bessie is the story of legendary blues performer Bessie Smith, who rose to fame during the 1920s. The movie stars Queen Latifah. 7:30p.

MONDAY, FEBRUARY 22 Gay Literature Group of Greater Cincinnati @ Clifton United Methodist Church, 3416 Clifton Ave., Cincinnati, 45220; FB: Gay Literature Group of Greater Cincinnati: This month’s read: Prick Up Your Ears: The Biography of Joe Orton, by John Lahr.

It’s about the life and death of the playwright. 7p.

Barry Manilow @ BB&T Arena, 500 Louie B. Nunn Dr., Highland Heights, Ky., 41099; barrymanilow.com: He writes the songs that make the whole world sing, and he’s performing one last tour. 8p; $19.75-$149.75.

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 12 Fire and Ice Scholarship Show @ Shooters, 927 Race St., Cincinnati, 45202; isqccbe.org: Truly St. James hosts a drag show to race money for the International Sovereign Queen City Court of the Buckeye Empire’s own Fire and Ice Scholarships. 11:30p.

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 13 Cincinnati Men’s Chorus: Love Is a Cabaret! @ Below Zero Lounge, 1120 Walnut St, Cincinnati, 45202; 513.542.2626; cincinnatimenschorus.org: It’s love, laughs and libations at the chorus’ annual Valentine’s Day show. 7p; $25 ($75 VIP includes dinner, reserved seating).

MONDAY, FEBRUARY 15 Big Bird & Maria Talk @ Miami University Hall Auditorium, Oxford, 45056; miamioh.edu: The two stars of Sesame Street - they’re Caroll Spinney and Sonia Manzano in real life - will talk outlookohio.com

about the role of the long-running children’s show in the development of cultural awareness. 7:30p. Tickets will be distributed to the university community on Feb. 10 and to the general public on Feb. 12.

THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 25 Blood on the Dance Floor @ Thompson House, 24 E. 3rd St., Newport, Ky., 41071; 859.261.7469; thompsonhousenewport.com: One half of the electronica pop duo of Dahvie Vanity and Jayy Von Monroe identifies as part of the LGBT community. Spoiler: It’s Monroe. 6p; $13.

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 26 QueerCon 2016 @ University of Cincinnati’s Tangeman University Center, 2766 UC Main St., Cincinnati, 45219; 513.556.6000; FB: QueerCon 2016: UC’s Women’s, Gender and Sexuality Studies Graduate Student Organization hosts a conference on feminist, queer and trans* studies and politics. 9a5:30p.

Muse Cincinnati Women’s Choir @ Music on the Avenue, St. John United Church of Christ, 520 Fairfield Ave., Bellevue, Ky., 41073; 513.221.1118; musechoir.org: Over five nights in February, Music on the Avenue features a range of musical groups. 8p.

[Insert gay joke about Bert and Ernie here.]

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savage love

by Dan Savage

No Place for Old Dildos I am no longer sexually active, but I have a significant collection of sex toys from earlier years. I’m thinking of getting rid of most of them, and it seems such a waste for them to end up in the landfill.

What’s an environmentally responsible way to dispose of dildos? I wish there was a place I could donate the dildos where they could be used again. Many of them are quality silicone types. They’ve never been used on a person without a condom and they’ve been thoroughly cleaned.

I’d be happy to donate them to impoverished dildo users in need, if only I knew where to send them.

- Reduce, Reuse, Recycle Your question comes up frequently, RRR, and there really isn’t a satisfactory answer.

In Seattle, where I live, a community tool bank recently opened in my neighborhood - but they don’t collect and lend the kind of tools you’re looking to donate.

I’ve heard about dildo graveyards in other cities (spots in parks where people bury their used sex toys), but burying sex toys isn’t environmentally responsible. And while high-quality dildos can be cleaned and safely reused, most people are pretty squeamish about the idea. Which is odd, considering that we routinely reuse actual cocks that have been enjoyed by others. Why not the fake ones?

But even if I can’t tell you what to do with your dildos, RRR, I can tell you what not to do with them: Do not ship your used dildos to the anti-government militia that has been occupying a federal wildlife refuge in rural Oregon. After militia members asked supporters to send them supplies via the U.S. Postal Service - their spokesperson complained bitterly about all the dildos they were getting in the mail.

So if you decide to put your used dildos in a box and send them somewhere, RRR, please make sure the address on the box doesn’t read: Bundy Militia, c/o Malheur National Wildlife Refuge, 36391 Sodhouse Lane, Princeton, Ore., 97721.

I understand that monogamy is not something people are good at, and that’s fine. In fact, most of the people I know are in healthy poly or monogamish relationships.

Fantasizing about others is fun, so is looking, so is porn and roleplay. There’s a world of deliciously kinky, weird and wonderful sex stuff I’d LOVE to explore until my sexy bits fall off. But I want to do those things with one partner and one partner only in a monogamous, intimate relationship.

Here’s the kicker: I’d like my partner to feel the same way. I don’t want someone to enter into a monogamous relationship with me if in their heart/groin they’d genuinely like to fuck other people. Am I a lost cause?

Surely I can’t be the only genuinely monogamous person there is?

I’m 31 and still turn heads, but I worry my quest for a partner who feels as I do is impossible and a waste of my time.

- One 4 One You value monogamy, you want a monogamous commitment and you want someone who feels the same. That’s great, O4O, and you have my full support. But you do acknowledge that fantasies about others can be fun, as can looking, as can porn (watching others) and roleplay (pretending to be others).

So while you might want to fuck other people - hence the looking and fantasizing and roleplaying - you have no desire to actually fuck other people.

If you’re having a hard time finding partners who want what you want - a monogamous commitment without the stress of maintaining the monogamous pretense/facade/fraud, i.e., pretending they don’t at least think about fucking other people - either you’re living in some sort of poly parallel universe where nonmonogamy is the default setting or you’re not giving others the same benefit of the doubt you’ve given yourself.

You want to fuck other people and you don’t seem to think that disqualifies you from making, honoring and genuinely wanting both a monogamous commitment and a monogamous sex life. (The two don’t always go hand in hand.)

If you’re breaking up with people for admitting to the same things you’ve admitted in your question - you might think about fucking other people, but you don’t want to actually fuck other people - then you’re the reason your quest to find a partner has been so frustrating.

Here’s the thing: I’m monogamous. Not the “I’m attracted to other people but won’t act on it because it makes me uncomfortable or believe it’s wrong” kind of monogamous, but the “I genuinely have ZERO desire to fuck anyone but my partner” kind of monogamous.

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Better not catch that nipple ring on your sweater.

You can email Dan Savage at mail@savagelove.net, follow him on Twitter at @fakedansavage or listen to his weekly podcast, Savage Lovecast, every Tuesday at thestranger.com/savage. Savage Love appears every month in Outlook and every week at outlookohio.com. outlookohio.com

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the divine life

by Debé

Aquarius (January 20 - February 18) It’s your month, but you are spinning your wheels and digging a deeper emotional rut.

You’re sexy when you brood, but tap into your spirituality and be brave.

Face your fears and start planning your victory lap. You’re even sexier when you’re happier.

Very Funny Aquarians: Ellen DeGeneres, Nathan Lane, Kathy Nijimy, Mo Rocca Pisces (February 19 - March 20) Still waiting for a white knight to save you from the emotional abyss? It’s time to buff up your own armor and take matters into your own hands. Use lotion if you start to chafe; otherwise, you know just what you need.

Aries (March 21 - April 19) You have a lot of excess energy, but instead of channeling it into sexy time, try directing it toward your goals and what you want to accomplish this year. It might not feel as immediately rewarding as sexy time, but it’s worth it.

Taurus (April 20 - May 20) You feel pressure from others to get moving, but you are digging in your hooves. You don’t want to be pushed. You’ll be ready when the time comes and on your terms. No emotional Viagra for you.

Gemini (May 21 - June 20) It’s so hard to focus when you’d rather frolic in the snow. You are in Peter Pan mode, but you have to face some of the serious things before they turn into serious problems. Tackle those problems and make them opportunities.

Cancer (June 21 - July 22) Things have stabilized, and you’re restless and ready to get things moving. The universe is cheering you on, so ride the momentum and take time to meet new friends and influence people. You’ll be the belle of the ball.

Leo (July 23 - August 22) Everything goes smoothly this month, like a well-lubricated... You are feeling helpful and cooperative. Hopefully, your lover(s) will notice and take advantage of you in delicious ways. Everybody wins! outlookohio.com

Virgo (August 23 - September 22) Those creative juices are overflowing and you need an outlet. The full moon in your sign on the 22nd has you bursting with activity and ambition. Try not to drown your S.O. in all that creative flow. Stock up on life preservers.

Libra (September 23 - October 22) It’s time to be introspective, so spend some time alone.

Ponder who you are and what you want without outside distractions. In other words, this is a great time to play with yourself. Relax and unwind. Ahhhhh.

Scorpio (October 23 - November 21) Your home life should be humming along, and it’s time to start stalking those goals.

Dust off your power suit, even if your power suit is a thong. If it is a thong, take your coat too. It’s cold outside, baby!

Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21) Wake up, little Susie! January’s lull is replaced by this month’s fire in the belly. This is a great month to start plotting - I mean planning - to fight for what you want.

Sharpen your sword and get ready for battle.

Capricorn (December 22 - January 19) Little emergencies keep interrupting your flow. Keep your cool while you’re putting out fires both at home and at work. Basically you’re a firefighter this month, but you do look cute in the uniform.

Handy Tip: The Head Line The head line - the middle of the three major lines in the hand - illustrates how you think. The straighter the line, the more logical the thought process. A curvier line (see image) indicates a more creative thinker.

Debé is a palmist, intuitive adviser and metaphysical teacher in Columbus. She is available for personal readings, parties, events and workshops. For more information, go to thepassionatepalmist.com. Look for her horoscopes every month in Outlook.

But can she predict six more weeks of winter?

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DeGeneres Is Ideal, Also Istic Across

Dawson’s Creek 62 Kind of homo 1 Anaïs Nin was one 64 First, for one 8 Golfer Muffin ___65 Whip material Devlin 66 “Jailhouse Rock” 15 Physically fit settings 16 Unit with some real 67 Become harder to stallions climb 17 “You wish!”

18 Rio beach of song V Down 19 Start of Degeneres’ comment 1 Had sex with, in on receiving the Peo- slang ple’s Choice Humani- 2 Letters over Mary’s tarian award son 21 More of the com3 On the ocean ment 4 Pulp Fiction actor 22 Rubbers of noses Ving 24 Seaman’s pair 5 Shakespeare’s feet 27 Doze off 6 Shake up 28 More of the com7 Erection of tempoment rary shelters 33 Debussy sea 8 Poli ___ 34 Trucker’s ride 9 Parenting couple, 36 Lea of OITNB sometimes 38 Imaginary 10 Cole Porter’s “Well, 40 Seaport of PaDid You ___” solini’s land 11 Half of Mork’s 41 Some Willa Cather good-bye works 12 Warhol critic 43 Came out on top Greenberg 44 Neighbor of Cal. 13 At Wit’s End author 45 Degeneres Bombeck 46 Put a scuff on 14 Idol of porn 48 Sign over 20 Ins. letters 49 Sondheim’s 23 Ann Bannon’s ___ Sweeney Todd, e.g.

Girl Out 52 Children’s hospital 24 Get a smile out of to which Degeneres 25 Self-directed donated her award Streisand film 57 End of the com26 Flamboyant Flynn ment 28 Cumming on the 60 Like Kerr Smith in stage

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29 Break for Heather’s mommies 30 One that mates with a queen bee 31 Was laid up in bed 32 Easily screwed 34 Prince’s purple precipitation 35 Island in gay Paree 37 Rocker Brian 39 Byron’s before 42 Mustangs of the NCAA 43 Violet Quill members, for example 47 “Try ___ might...”

48 Queer as a threedollar bill, e.g.

49 Mullally of Will & Grace 50 Weight unit for your stones 51 “Is that true of us?”

52 Margaret Cho’s Can’t ___ Dancing 53 Alas., once 54 Knight in the saga of Moff Mors 55 Aussie colleges 56 Paul of Little Miss Sunshine 58 “Take ___ from me ...”

59 Staircase descender for Duchamp 61 Dottermans of Antonia’s Line 63 DC figure

Look for A and K’s Lesbian 101 on Page 18.

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Outlook Magazine: Celebrating 20 years!

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