2016-03-01 Outlook Ohio Magazine

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The Voice of Ohio’s LGBT and Ally Community

! l o o P e h t n i k c Ba

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vol 20 • issue 10

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Outlook Magazine: Celebrating 20 years!

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Thanks to all our advertisers and readers for two decades of support! You rock!

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Outlook Magazine: Celebrating 20 years!

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Thanks to all our advertisers and readers for two decades of support! You rock!

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Outlook Magazine: Celebrating 20 years!

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Thanks to all our advertisers and readers for two decades of support! You rock!

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VOTE BOB! DON’T SHAVE!

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The Hair Issue

Dearest Outlook Readers,

you are here

I think this will end up being the shortest Letter from the Publisher I’ve ever written.

I’ve only got a few points to make, and in the interest of brevity and effiency, traits which I admire above most others, I’ll say my peace in five bullet points.

1. Vote Outlook’s own Bob Vitale to the Franklin County Democratic Central Committee. We endorse him.

snapshot

qmunity briefs

polisigh: endorsements

march sassness bracket

snapshot

bears in swimwear 2

small pond: square one

2. Vote in the March primary, regardless of who you will vote for, please.

3. Bears in Swimwear - I’m a fan!

4. Shaving Men’s Body Hair - yo bro, don’t shave or “trim” to look prepubecent (i.e., off or so short you can see skin) - I’m so so not a fan.

5. Check out outlookohio for tons more hair coverage and bears and politics and toons, and ... xoxo Christopher Hayes, Publisher

ASSOCIATE PUBLISHERS Bob Vitale / Chad Frye

HEADQUARTERS Outlook Media, Inc. 815 N High St, Ste G, Columbus, OH 43215 614.268.8525 phone / 614.261.8200 fax SALES Chad Frye / cfrye@outlookmedia.com Mike Moffo / mike@outlookmedia.com NATIONAL ADVERTISING Rivendell Media - 212.242.6863 EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Bob Vitale / bvitale@outlookmedia.com MANAGING EDITOR Erin McCalla / erin@outlookmedia.com CONTRIBUTING WRITERS James Blackmon, Brooke Cartus, Alisa Caton, Debé, Aimee Hancock, Erin McCalla, Dan Savage, Brynn Tannehill, Bob Vitale, Mickey Weems

dyke like me

ART DIRECTOR

trans point analysis

Christopher Hayes / art@outlookmedia.com

IMHO

CONTRIBUTING DESIGNERS/PHOTOGRAPHERS Jessica Campbell, Aimee Hancock, Andrew Williams

calendar: Toledo

CYBERSPACE outlookohio.com outlookmedia.com networkcolumbus.com twitter / fb: outlook ohio

complete the circuit Love Big Wedding Expo @ Cleveland 01/24/16

calendar: Cleveland calendar: Cincinnati calendar: Columbus trippin’ out:

savage love

the divine life ‘toons

puzzling

CANAPI Chili Cookoff @ Tear-Ez, Akron 02/06/16

outloo

k

We told our straight, cubby, freelance photographer Andrew Williams “it’s time to go down to the pool...” and shoot some bears.

And that he did. Andrew was excited that he could say he’d finally been to a gay bathhouse. We think he was awlfully comfy in that pool... Contact Andrew via FB: A.W.Pixel or wpixel.wordpress.com/

next month:

The Fools Issue march 2016

Outlook is published and distributed by Outlook Media Inc., on the first day of each month throughout Ohio.

Outlook is a free publication provided solely for the use of our readers. Any person who willfully or knowingly obtains or exerts unauthorized control over more than 5 copies of any issue of Outlook with the intent to prevent other individuals from reading it shall be considered guilty of the crime of theft. Violators will be prosecuted.

calendar: Dayton

The views expressed in Outlook are those of the individual authors and do not necessarily reflect the views, policies, or personal, business, or professional practices of Outlook Media Inc., or its staff, ownership or management.

Outlook Media Inc., does not investigate or accept responsibility for claims made in any advertisement. Outlook Media Inc., assumes no responsibility for claims arising in connection with products and services advertised herein, nor for the content of, or reply to, any advertisement.

All material is copyrighted ©2016 Outlook Media Inc., All rights reserved.

on the cover:

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PUBLISHER Christopher Hayes

Pride Night @ OSU Men’s Hockey 01/23/16

Network Columbus @ COSI 02/10/16

puzzling solution - puzzle on pg 35

LGBT Roundtable With Columbus Mayor Andrew Ginther 02/16/16

Don’t forget to vote on March 15.

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Fly little bird, fly!

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Outlook Magazine: Celebrating 20 years!

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qmunity

Those Bathroom Bills Gotta Go

South Dakota lawmakers decided in February that they know best which restrooms should be used by transgender children, sending Gov. Dennis Daugaard a measure that would require students to use facilities designated for the gender they were assigned at birth.

Virginia lawmakers on a legislative committee endorsed a proposal that would forbid

children from using restrooms of the gender with which they identify.

But an anonymous trans man at Kent State University put a punctuation mark on the whole ridiculous debate.

“A trans man used this bathroom, and the world did not end,” he wrote.

And the governor of Maine stopped a state agency from creating rules that would have allowed students to use restrooms that correspond

Around Ohio

Cincinnati: Who will it be? Cincinnati

Pride will announce the festival’s 2016 headliner on Thursday, March 17, at Tillie’s Lounge, 4042 Hamilton Ave., Cincinnati, 45223. The 6p reveal is paired with a Cocktails for a Cause event.

Cincinnati: PFLAG Cincinnati is ac-

cepting applications through Friday, April 15, for 2016-17 college scholarships. You must be an LGBT or allied college student who attends school in or is from the Cincinnati area.

Visit pflagcinci.org.

Clarksville: Camp Sunrise, the annual summer adventure for 6- to 17-year-olds living with or affected by HIV/AIDS, is scheduled for Aug. 7-13. Applications will be available closer to summer at sunrisekids.org.

Cleveland: More than 15 Northeast Ohio employers are lined up already for a Transgender Job Fair to be hosted by MetroHealth on Saturday, April 23, from 9a-4p. The fair will take place at 2500 MetroHealth Dr., Cleveland, 44109 Columbus: AIDS Resource Center

Ohio has added Saturday hours for its PrEP Clinic at 1033 N. High St., 43201. They are 8:30a-12:30p.

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with their gender identity.

A photo of the comment was posted by FTM magazine, which focuses on the transmasculine community.

Columbus: Kaleidoscope Youth Center has a new home. The gathering place for LGBT and allied youth is now at 603 E. Town St., in the Discovery District of Downtown.

Two Ohio Kids Punished for Expression at School Two Ohio school districts found themselves with PR headaches last month after employees tried to punish students for their self-expression.

with any student who identifies themselves as transgender and will make accommodations as appropriate so their education can continue.”

In Toledo, Dylan Hill was sent home from Woodward High School on Jan. 28 when she wore a long, black skirt on the day she and other orchestra members were getting their picture taken.

In Columbus, a cafeteria employee at West High School refused to serve cheerleading squad captain Matthew Gabbert one February afternoon because he was wearing a bow in his hair.

Hill said her teacher said she couldn’t be part of the picture, and the school’s principal sent her home after asserting that she violated the dress code.

“She was like you can’t wear the bow in here because you’re not a girl,” Gabbert told WSYX-TV. He told the station that he took the bow out of his hair and began to cry.

“He said I can come back as long as I don’t wear female attire again,” Hill told Toledo’s WTVG-TV.

Boys at the school began wearing bows in their hair as a gesture of support for Gabbert. They posted photos with the hashtag #bowsforboys.

Although Hill said she wore a skirt to school before without incident, a Toledo Public Schools spokesman said Woodward officials didn’t know she was trans. The spokesman said the district “is committed to working

Abby Wambach Gets a Kick Out of Barbie modeled after the captain of the champion U.S. World Cup soccer team. Wambach was both thrilled and moved by the gesture.

Dayton: Wright State University has installed its first universal multi-stalled restrooms on campus. Both are in the Student Union, near the Office of LGBTQA Affairs in Room 011.

Dayton: Pride organizers are hoping to

create an area for LGBT youth at this year’s festival. PFLAG, GLSEN Greater Dayton and other groups will help create the space. Visit GLSEN’s Facebook page to get involved.

Columbus City Schools officials reassigned the employee to a job where she won’t be around children.

“This is a really impactful statement,” she said of its impact on young Abbys all over the world. “If you’re out there and maybe your doll doesn’t look exactly like you feel, here’s another option.”

Abby Wambach used to play with Barbies.

Now she is one.

Mattel unveiled a doll in February that’s

She followed that observation with this: “I mean, c’mon people! I have a Barbie! All the cool kids are going to want this...”

Scio: Circle JJ Ranch, the men’s camp-

ground about 40 miles southeast of Akron in Harrison County, is now taking reservations for the summer season. A Welcome Back Party is scheduled for Saturday, April 2.

Urbana: Equality Springfield is asking

constituents of state Rep. Nino Vitale (R-Urbana) to contact their lawmaker about his sponsorship of a bill in the Ohio House that does nothing but restate already held rights of religious leaders not to perform weddings for anyone they don’t like. The group accused Vitale of fear-mongering.

Turtle = Mitch McConnell. (Because it’s always funnier when you explain the joke.)

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political endorsements

HILLARY CLINTON FOR PRESIDENT

Has there ever been an American more qualified for the presidency?

Hillary Clinton has traveled the world as secretary of state. She served eight years in the U.S. Senate. She worked in the White House for eight years as first lady.

Short of a stint on the Supreme Court or a turn on Celebrity Apprentice, she’s pretty much seen it all, done it all and not only bought the T-shirt, she probably designed it and took care of ordering it from the printer, too.

Outlook enthusiastically endorses Hillary Clinton to be the 45th president of the United States.

We are thrilled that LGBT Americans have two allies to choose from in the Democratic race. We cannot thank Vermont Sen. Bernie Sanders enough for his longtime support of LGBT causes.

We feel that Clinton, though, has the experience and political savvy to accomplish more of the priorities both Democrats share, even with a Congress likely to remain at least partially in the hands of a take-back-America crowd hell-bent on taking America back to a time when gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender Americans - and women, AfricanAmericans, new Americans and so many others - were not part of the conversation.

Frankly, we like Clinton’s zeal for politics.

She’ll be able to outwit and outmaneuver her opponents - and ours.

That’s not to say we believe the caricature of Hillary Clinton as a stone-cold political animal. She went to work for the Children’s Defense Fund after graduating from Yale Law School. She went to work in President Obama’s Cabinet as secretary of state after their bitter fight for the 2008 nomination.

Two days before the New Hampshire primary last month, she went to Flint, Mich. Officials there said she’s the only presidential candidate who has asked what she can do to help

during their water crisis.

And how does the Gallup Poll’s most admired woman in the world for 20 of the past 23 years describe herself? On Twitter, her page reads: “Wife, mom, grandma, women+kids advocate, FLOTUS, Senator, SecState, hair icon, pantsuit aficionado, 2016 presidential candidate.”

Some point out that Clinton only announced her support for marriage equality in March 2013, as the U.S. Supreme Court was hearing cases that would become the first two strikes against the 1996 Defense of Marriage Act signed by her husband.

Clinton supports the Equality Act, which would add gender identity and sexual orientation to the nation’s nondiscrimination laws. She supports banning “conversion therapy” for LGBT children.

Clinton supports capping out-of-pocket medical expenses for those living with HIV/AIDS and expanding the use of the preventive drug regimen known as PrEP. She supports allowing transgender Americans to serve openly in the military, and she has vowed to upgrade the service records of LGBT veterans who were dishonorably discharged.

First, we’re reluctant to hold Clinton responsible for her husband’s actions. Her hand didn’t hold the pen that signed DOMA or Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell into law. Second, we remember the 1990s. That the Clintons talked about gay people as people was progress.

We don’t know if Hillary Clinton can get all that done. This country is almost hopelessly divided right now, it seems.

And finally, in Hillary Clinton’s own words: “I think we have all evolved.”

If anyone can do it, we believe she can.

support no less valuable. Many parents reject their LGBT children.

men and women and people with HIV/AIDS.

But we sure want to see our nation’s first woman president get the opportunity.

TED STRICKLAND FOR U.S. SENATE

Ted Strickland served Ohio for 16 years as a member of Congress and governor, and we’re glad to see him back in the political arena. Outlook endorses our friend and ally for the U.S. Senate.

No matter who wins the Democratic primary on March 15 and the general election on Nov. 8, LGBT Ohioans will have an ally in office. We could easily have endorsed Cincinnati City Council member P.G. Sittenfeld for the Democratic nomination. He is a smart, capable 31-year-old who would be first Millennial in the Senate.

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When we interviewed Sittenfeld last year and asked what makes him an ally, we weren’t trying to stump him but we did. “I was born an ally,” he said. We look forward to the day his generation runs this country.

And although we disagree with incumbent Rob Portman on many issues, including his already announced opposition to the idea of President Obama nominating a Supreme Court justice, we salute the Republican for his public support on two key LGBT civilrights issues.

Portman announced his support for marriage equality in 2013 and voted for the LGBT-inclusive Employment Non-Discrimination Act. That his change of heart came after his gay son’s coming out makes his

But we think Strickland will do more for LGBT Ohioans as our voice in the U.S. Senate, and we think he will be able to do it more quickly than Sittenfeld. He knows Washington, he knows Ohio, and he knows LGBT issues.

Strickland has vowed to support only those nominees for the U.S. Supreme Court who “protect civil rights, human rights and LGBT rights.” And while Portman wants to defund the Affordable Care Act, Strickland cites provisions such as its ban on pre-existing conditions as one of many reasons to support the law. Insurers used to cite pre-existing conditions to deny coverage to transgender

Strickland says mere tolerance toward our community is no longer enough. Today, he says, “we are for inclusion.” And he has walked the walk. He appointed Ohio’s first openly gay head of a state agency. His executive order barring anti-LGBT discrimination in state government hiring was the first of its kind.

While Ted Strickland would be among the oldest senators (he turns 75 in August), his support for LGBT issues - and LGBT people sounds just like a member of Sittenfeld’s generation.

And we could use more youthful thinking in the U.S. Senate.

VIsit outlookohio.com for our endorsements in Franklin County government races.

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Thanks to all our advertisers and readers for two decades of support! You rock!

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Put that NCAA bracket away. You know you were just going to predict winners based on whose

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1 16 8 9 5 12 4 13 6 11 3 14 7 10 2 15 1 16 8 9 5 12 4 13 6 11 3 14 7 10 2 15

mascot could kill the other, anyhow, and there’s no way to get the Buckeyes into the Final Four

Cher Patti LuPone Diana Ross Freddie Mercury Elton John Grace Jones Bette Midler Liberace Aretha Franklin

DIVAS

Elizabeth Taylor Madonna Janet Jackson Mariah Carey RuPaul Barbra Streisand Bette Davis Judy Garland Andy Dick

Donna Summer Boy George Britney Spears George Michael Whitney Houston Lindsay Lohan Joan Crawford Divine

BEAUTIFUL MESSES

Marilyn Monroe Miley Cyrus Karen Walker Patsy and Edina Liza Minnelli Rosie O’Donnell

Dark Horse: George Michael / Las Vegas Favorite: Cher

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based on that methodology. we’ve embraced forever.

We’ve got a new competition this year - a bracket full of LGBT icons. Help us pick the winners for each matchup, all the way to the finals, We have our divas in one at our Outlook Ohio Magazine bracket and our BFFs in anpage on Facebook. We’ll start the other. We have a category for voting on March 17 when the first our up-and-coming faves, and NCAA tournament game tips off. one for those beloved but troubled or controversial figures May the best icon win!

Lady Gaga 1 Goldfrapp 16 Katy Perry

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Robyn 9 Jonathan Groff

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NEW CLASS

Tegan and Sara 12 Taylor Swift Beth Ditto Caitlyn Jenner Jussie Smollett Adele Jennifer Hudson Niki Minaj Ke$ha Beyoncé Adam Lambert Ellen DeGeneres John Waters Kathy Griffin Joan Rivers Dolly Parton Lily Tomlin

BFFs

Melissa Etheridge Indigo Girls Laverne Cox Anderson and Andy The Obamas Ricky Martin Neil Patrick Harris Rachel Maddow Oprah Winfrey Ian McKellen

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Welcome to the Outlook family, Pigskin!

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Bears in Swimwear 2:

Back in the Pool!

We like photographing bears in their natural habitat.

decided we had to visit Cleveland. (We won’t divulge our research methodology, but Three years ago, we staged our we’re reasonably sure Northeast first Bears in Swimwear photo Ohio has more bears per capita shoot at Exile, the Columbus bar than anywhere else in the with the hairiest happy hours we state.) know.

OK, we went on Growlr and When we decided to bring back asked for a few good bears. the feature this month, we Thanks to all the guys who outlookohio.com

Woof!

came to Flex to frolic with us.

And special growls out to Todd Saporito for hosting the shoot and to CandyManFashion.com for providing select WildmanT swimwear.

Photos by Andrew Williams

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Arktos is the Greek word for bears. And Arktos Bears is the Northeast Ohio club for them.

One of the oldest bear clubs in the country, it’s open to gay and bi men 21 and older who are bears, cubs, otters - or just like to be around them. Visit

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arktosbears.org or email info@arktosbears.org for more.

Above, front row: David (Parma), Mark (Solon), Cody (Massillon), Eric (Akron).

Above, back row: Mike (Cleveland), Andy (Mentor), Marwan (Cleveland). Right: Grayson (Westlake).

Thank you, Todd Saporito and our friends at Flex for your hospitality!

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Arktos Bears will host “Bears in Boxers” at 9p on Saturday, March 12, at Cocktails Cleveland.

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small pond

PAST SQUARE ONE

Dayton Salon Owners Share Their Success With Employees

by Aimee Hancock

Joshua Stucky always dreamed of owning his own business, but his dreams didn’t necessarily include the happy twist of five more locations and a spinoff.

Seventeen years after opening the first Square One Salon in Dayton, he and partners Brent Johnson and Doug Henderson are about to launch their sixth location in Oak Creek. They already expanded to Columbus five years ago with salons Downtown and in the suburb of New Albany, and they operate other locations on Brown Street near the University of Dayton and in Centerville.

actually just retired in May.” Stucky is originally from Springfield, and Johnson is from just south of Dayton.

They’ve lived in the area for nearly 30 years and also helped found the Rubi Girls, the Dayton drag troupe that has raised more than $1 million over the last three decades for HIV/AIDS services and LGBT organizations.

The partners believe in helping others through their businesses as well. They’ve adopted a philosophy they call the Four Corner Focus, which encompasses undivided attention and total satisfaction for customers, charity toward those who face challenges, fostering community growth and wellness, and creating a enjoyable work environment.

a unique variety to attract customers whom he felt were underrepresented in the area.

“One thing that Dayton lacks is a really sassy, classy store, and it needed a little bit of both,” Stucky said. “The second thing is, I feel like we don’t really represent the gay and lesbian community in this town, and what we have found is we cannot keep gay and lesbian stuff on the shelves because there are that many people who are like, ‘Finally, there’s a store for us.’”

Agnes & Orson is located below the Brown Street Square One location near UD.

“We opened the last week of November and we have been busy since the doors Square One salons offer the full range of opened,” Stucky said. “We get a lot of services for hair - cuts, styling, coloring and young people. The young people push us more - but the routine services also include Part of that belief, Johnson said, is that em- into the ‘sassy’ part. I’ve said this before, relaxing extras like mini-facials and scalp ployees are important assets to any busithat you can have beautiful glassware and massages. Every location also offers mani- ness and should be treated that way. Five it will sit here, [but] the minute you put the cures and pedicures, waxing and makeup long-term employees have been able to buy f-word on it, it’s sold.” services. Each also has a menu of spa shares in the business and are now partservices that includes facials, massage ners at the salons on Brown Street and in What’s really cool about Agnes & Orson, and body wraps.

Oak Creek. The Oak Creek location is sched- Johnson said, is that Stucky opened the uled to open this month. business with two Square One employees.

“When we opened, we didn’t really expect it to get this far,” said Johnson, who is “It’s really unique,” Johnson said. “We just “We still work together in that location Stucky’s life partner as well. “We just wanted to find a way to thank them and tie [within] the hierarchy of ownership and emwanted to open a business, have fun with it in key people who are really part of our suc- ployee,” he said. “But then they work over and see where it went. In fact, Josh and I cess and give them [more] opportunities.” here side by side as co-owners in the busiboth kept our regular jobs and just came in ness.” on the evenings and weekends. It eventuThis past November, Stucky added another ally involved both of us leaving our perma- business to the Square One company with a “We’re a big huge family,” Stucky said. nent positions.” gift and goods shop called Agnes & Orson. “We do everything together. If one person Named after Stucky’s two beloved dogs, the has a baby, we all have a baby. It’s one of Stucky worked as a 4th-grade teacher in shop had always been part of his dream of those kinds of situations. We’re just very Kettering after studying at Wright State owning a business. blessed that way.”

University and the University of Dayton.

Aimee Hancock is a 2014 graduate of Bowling Green A&O is an eclectic store full of gifts and State University, where she studied journalism and “I taught school for 25 years,” he said. “I knick-knacks. Stucky’s vision was to provide popular culture. She currently lives in Troy and works

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as a freelance writer in Western and Southwest Ohio.

Josh (on the left in the photo above) is Dana Sintell, and Brent is India Summer in the Rubi Girls.

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ARC Ohio’s Columbus PrEP Clinic is now open from 8:30a-12:30p on Saturdays.

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transition point analysis

Fashion Fears

Do Clothes Make the Trans Woman? Many Seem to Think So

by Brynn Tannehill

When Caitlyn Jenner quipped that the hardest part of being a woman was “figuring out what to wear,” she was roundly criticized for it. Being a woman - or especially a transgender woman - carries all sorts of life penalties and challenges far worse than fashion faux pas, including poverty, rejection, stigma, isolation, suicide and being a victim of extreme violence.

And yet, figuring out how to dress yourself in a new gender is still a challenge.

Most people get a decade or more to figure out their style.

Which cuts, colors and lengths are flattering, which less so.

Given the isolation and stigma transgender women face, though, finding someone to provide guidance is unusual. We struggle with gendered clothing cut for one body type, and have something at the margins of the norm.

This is just a really fancy way of saying that, even more than most women, we struggle to find clothes that fit.

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selves. Find ourselves. And make mistakes.

It’s like being Shroedinger’s transgender person.

Lots of mistakes.

Then there’s hair. In our society hair length is a strong cultural It’s a rarity for transgender peo- gender marker. Men have short ple to not look back at the hair; women have long hair. A wardrobes they assembled right man with long hair is looked at after they transitioned and askance and considered unsuitthink, “What the **** was I able for the white-collar world. thinking?” There are errors in A woman with short hair - and what fits, in finding the right particularly a younger woman style for the workplace, in is seen as being a potential leswhat’s considered appropriate bian and thus, more stereotypifor one’s age. cally masculine, if she keeps her hair short.

Most transgender people never got to be the young men and Nowhere is this more obvious women they always saw them- than with our 13-year-old selves as. daughter, who decided to wear her hair short and is now conIt’s one of the great tragedies of sidered the “butchest” girl in our existence. Almost all of us her junior high class. She has wasted our youth trying to be been treated differently since someone we weren’t. As a reshe cut 18 inches of hair off sult, many trans people dress in and donated it to Locks of Love. a manner more typical of younger cisgender peers, beShe’s sometimes assumed to be cause there is a need to experi- a “baby dyke” by her peers. ence something they never had, She’s not. She just prefers an and never will have (i.e., being extra 15 minutes of sleep every young in the correct gender). morning to fussing with her hair.

Still, this implies that there’s a “right” way for people to dress. We are far too quick to judge First of all, there isn’t. Be you. people based on what they wear Second, people will always find and how they wear it. We give a way to object to how a trans- people far too little latitude to gender woman dresses herself. express their gender. We make assumptions about the validity If she dresses in a feminine of people’s identities and orienway, some people will claim tation based on their hair and she’s making a caricature of their clothes. women or buying into the patriarchy and therefore not a “real” And we all know what happens woman. If she dresses in a when you assume. more masculine way, she’s seen as not feminine enough to be a Brynn Tannehill is a former naval “real” woman either. aviator and former Xenia resi-

Even if clothes sort-of fit, few transgender people have the resources to have everything tailored. At the same time, we’re expected to continue to function at our jobs and appear professional, despite having little in the way of experience, wardrobes or resources to fill them. Oh, and finding a new job as a transgender person is ridiculously difficult, so no presdent who can be found on Twitter sure or anything.

This double standard crosses @BrynnTannehill. She over into absurdity when a trans writes a Still, being able to explore our woman can be criticized simulmonthly colgender expressions for the first taneously as too masculine and umn for Outtime is exhilarating. Free, after too feminine to be “real.” look. decades, to finally express our-

Send your wedding and engagement announcements to erin@outlookmedia.com.

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dyke like me

The Clock Is Ticking...

Dig Out Your Body Glitter. Pride Prep 2016 Is Here!

by Brooke Cartus

It’s almost here: We are OFFICIALLY in queer Christmas pre-season.

But Brooke, you ask, isn’t it too soon to prep for Pride? Won’t the Jell-O shots melt? Won’t the pancake makeup cake off in the warmth of the spring Ohio sun?

Not that kind of prep, you guys. It’s March, which means we have approximately 90 days until Pride season and the month of events, parties, shindigs, happy hours, brunches, gathering, pool parties and cake (...actual cake). So it’s time to prep for Queer Christmas with some seemingly easy steps to make sure you aren’t just ready for Pride, but also for an incredibly awesome summer after this sleety, rainy, snowy hibernation session.

Step 1: Lose the baggage.

No, this doesn’t mean dump your boyfriend or girlfriend or pitbull.

It just means to take an inventory. How are your personal relationships? How is that self-care Sunday promise you made to yourself in January?

You know those bad habits you developed in the winter that you just couldn’t shake? Now is the time to do some self-spring cleaning (insert TERRIBLE carpet-cleaning lesbian joke here). Hit some self-care and take a look at your relationships. Maybe they need some attention after a winter of introverting.

Have Netflix and turkey chili kept you from leaving the couch this winter? Reach out to some friends and LEAVE. THE. HOUSE. Trust me: Any leftover winter issues with friends or significant others that aren’t resolved now will turn into a vodka-soaked hydra by the time Pride rolls around.

Step 2: No need to be a hero, but those jorts arenÊt going to squeeze into themselves.

OK, we are all f*cking beautiful unicorns. And bonus: We are in the Midwest, so curvy isn’t just sexy, it’s also the only option if you expect to keep up with game day boneless wings and ALL the ranch. outlookohio.com

I’m not saying lose weight, and I’m certainly not saying you are fat or not in shape. But GURL! Do you know how many of your exes are going to be at Pride? Exactly. It’s a veritable ex parade, complete with funnel cake and draft beer.

Now’s the time to drop the habit of your afternoon doughnut and grab a green tea. Not even for the weight loss, but just to get healthier. You survived another Ohio winter... good for you! But fortunately, due to the invention of indoor heating, you don’t need to build extra layers of fat to keep you warm during the winter months. You will feel better with a few more healthy choices, and feeling better ALWAYS leads to looking better. Ask my jorts, they will tell you.

Step 3: Know your roots.

How do I know we’re in pre-Pride season? The official start of Pride for me is when a straight person asks, “Why do you have a Gay Pride?” Or, “You have marriage. What are you marching for?” AND MY PERSONAL FAVORITE, “There’s no straight pride, so why should there be a Gay Pride?”

To answer these and the myriad other ridiculous questions, I recommend boning up on your LGBT history, like the famous 1969 Stonewall Riots or the lesser known Compton’s Café Riot in San Francisco in 1966. Talk about our history through the lens of our community of marginalization and isolation. Discuss how even today, countless states (including Ohio!) have no state laws protecting LGBT people from employment and housing discrimination, and that there is no federal law protecting LGBT people from such discrimination.

I could go on. And if you have ever gotten a drink with me, I’m sure I have gone on and on. We march in June not just to commemorate and recognize the past, but also to demand a brighter future.

So let’s prep to make this Pride the best one yet, by making sure we feel good, we look even better, and we know exactly why we march this year.

And every year.

Brooke Cartus is a Chapstick lesbian with a law degree. You can find more of her writing on her blog, Size L for Lady, at brookecartus.com. Look for Dyke Like Me every month in Outlook.

So body glitter is still a thing, huh?

march 2016

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The Envelope

IMHO

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Gayest Film Ever? Could Be Joan’s, Could Be Judy’s

by James Blackmon

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24

march 2016

the hotter and younger threesome Earlier today, in a previous cereof Tom Cruise, Anthony Edwards mony, Jamesys were presented to It’s awards season. That time of and Val Kilmer in a military the following: the year when the best and the fetishist’s wet dream.

Worst Gay Film Made for brightest in the entertainment biz Straight People: Philadelphia are honored for their exceptional But 300 has hunkalicious Gerard (1993); Best Trans Film: Boys achievements.

Butler and another 299 practiDon’t Cry (1999) and TransAmercally naked, living sculptures of ica (2005); Best Straight PerSo, in honor of last month’s Osmasculinity, bodies entwined in a formance by a Gay Actor: Neil cars (and my recent rundown on bacchanalia of violence, thrustPatrick Harris, the Harold and the best LGBT-themed Halloween ing their big swords into each Kumar series (2004, 2008, 2011); films, I present to you the Jamesy other until they collapse in a and Best Performance by an AlAwards II, voted on by a distinbloody orgasm of death. legedly Closeted Actor: the films guished and esteemed panel of of Whitney Houston and John Traone and presented to the most ex- In the Best LGBT Film About volta. cellent and gayest artistic enLGBT People category, the winner deavors, whilst celebrating LGBT is… Bound (1996). Starring les- And now, the final award of the cinematic fabulousness.) bian icon Gina Gershon and Meg evening, the Jamesy for Gayest Tilly, Bound is a neo-noir crime Film EVER! …

First, the Jamesy for Best Drag thriller about the romantic/sexual Road Film goes to… To Wong relationship between Corky (Ger- Nominee The Wizard of Oz (1939) Foo, Thanks for Everything! Julie shon) and Violet (Tilly) and their is a splendid little romp about a Newmar (1995). With stiff complan to steal $2 million from Vio- gay Scarecrow, a gay Tinman, a petition from The Adventures Of let’s mobster boyfriend. It’s the di- gay Lion and their gal-pal, Priscilla, Queen of the Desert rectorial debut of the Wachowskis Dorothy, journeying together to the (1994) and Some Like it Hot (The Matrix series, Jupiter Asfabulous Emerald City to see a (1959), To Wong Foo… is the cending). Transgender filmmaker gay Wizard, discovering along easy choice for three simple rea- Lana Wachowski, along with her their way that they’re gonna have sons: hunky hotness Patrick brother, Andy, are also the writers. to kill a witch.

Swayze (Roadhouse, Dirty Dancing, Ghost), big butch action star Nominees Brokeback Mountain But the award goes to Mommie Wesley Snipes (Demolition Man, (2005), Milk (2008) and Torch Dearest (1981). Gay icon Faye Blade) and acerbic comedian Song Trilogy (1988) are all brilDunaway IS gay icon Joan CrawJohn Leguizamo. liant films exploring various ford in this deliciously campy, facets of what our lives were like over-the-top biopic. There’s someThey deliver brilliant performas LGBT Americans living in the thing special about this film. ances as three drag queens trav- 1960s through the 1980s. But the Gays all around the world LOVE it, eling cross-country in an old relationship between Corky and myself included. Told from the Cadillac convertible to compete Violet, set within this Wachowski- POV of adopted daughter for the title, Drag Queen Of Amer- envisioned stylized thriller, is sexy Christina, Dunaway’s Crawford, ica. The three are never uncomand erotic - and very gay for a looking like drag queen royalty, is fortable in their gender-bending mainstream film in 1996. sometimes funny, sometimes roles, expertly portraying gay men tragic but always fabulous and dealing with acceptance, family Receiving the Jamesy for Best strong and larger-than-life. and personal insecurities. Bonus Performance by a Gay Icon… points for Stockard Channing’s Liza Minnelli, Sex and the City 2 The film is bursting with quotable inclusion in this cast.

(2010). All the nominees in this lines, and clips have been showcategory are divarific: Madonna ing on gay bar TVs forever. Never Next, the Jamesy for Gayest Film was born to play Breathless Ma- seen it? WTF? It’s the Gayest Film About Straight People goes to… honey in Dick Tracy (1990), and Ever!

300 (2006). The other nominees Judy Garland truly blesses us with James Blackmon all have their charms. Batman the classics “Have Yourself A is a musician, and Robin (1997) added a new Merry Little Christmas” and “The actor, director dimension to the homoerotic Bat- Trolley Song” in Meet Me in St. and former owner man/Robin daddy/son dynamic Louis (1944). But, Judy’s baby girl of James Club 88 in Columbus. with George Clooney and Chris kills Beyoncé’s “Single Ladies,” You can follow O’Donnell donning new ass-hug- proving that even at 64, she’s still him on Twitter @MrJamesBlackmon. ging, codpieced and benippled Liza With a Z! Look for IMHO again in the May issue batsuits. And Top Gun (1986) has

Joan and Judy could square off in our March Sassness bracket. See Page 14.

of Outlook.

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complete the circuit

Mourning in America?

The Tragic Deaths of Antonin Scalia and Osama bin Laden

by Mickey Weems

I have a Tea Party friend who’s about one AK-47 away from committing a massacre. Yet he chided me thus: “Dancing on the grave of a man with whom you disagree is shameless and classless. I thought you were better than that.”

I’m confused. Was he talking about my reaction to the death of Antonin Scalia or the death of Osama bin Laden?

Celebrating Osama’s Death When I learned that Osama bin Laden had died, I rejoiced.

Some of my friends found my joy repellant, and I understand why. I honor their sense of humanity, but I just don’t share their opinion.

George W. Bush said that bin Laden and his associates hated freedom. Osama was clear about which freedoms he really, really hated: freedom for Gay people to love whomever they choose and freedom for women to control their own bodies.

Bin Laden was an educated man, but his view of righteousness was dangerous for the future of humanity. Persecution of LGBT people is fueled by aggressive machismo that inspires Straight men to attack anyone who doesn’t adhere to hetero-sex as the only sex that God allows, anyone who undermines men’s supremacy over women by refusing to follow gender norms, and anyone who threatens men’s control over the womb.

The consequences of this machismo are catastrophic: out-of-control population growth, a terrorized female population, boys who grow up afraid of being labeled as pussies or faggots, and dysoutlookohio.com

functional nations that can only avoid civil war if they go to war with another country.

Supreme Court for his bigoted rulings and naked pandering to the wealthy.

Celebrating Scalia’s Death When I reviewed Antonin Scalia’s history as a Supreme Court justice, I saw evidence of a clever man but not an intelligent one, much like bin Laden.

Like bin Laden, Scalia was against abortion and LGBT rights.

I would have been overjoyed if both men had had the intellectual and moral sophistication to admit their errors and seek forgiveness. Tragically for their sakes, neither man took the opportunity to make amends for his sins against humanity before he died.

Neither man took the time to study the brilliant intellectual underpinnings of feminism, women’s reproductive freedom and Queer studies. Like bin Laden, Scalia was a fan of torture, betraying an astonishing disdain for the rule of law. And like bin Laden, he based his foolishness on religious fundamentalism that amputated his ability to reason and diminished his capacity to act in the public sphere with compassion.

Like bin Laden, Scalia had no wish to keep his ethical disabilities to himself; he encouraged the oppression of others.

One may argue that, unlike bin Laden, Scalia didn’t actually order innocents to be killed.

This is a valid point. I do not know, however, whether he would have refrained from executing innocent people if he were in a society that would have allowed him to do so.

With his support of torture, I suspect he would have been outstanding as a judge in the Spanish Inquisition.

The Greater Tragedy Strictly speaking, I celebrated neither bin Laden’s nor Scalia’s death, just their removal from positions of influence. I would have been happier if bin Laden had been captured, tried and imprisoned. For Scalia, I would have preferred that he were dismissed from the U.S.

Antonin Scalia raised a son, Paul Scalia, who became a Catholic priest. Paul is in an organization, ironically called Courage, whose mission is to help Gay Catholic men learn to amputate their sexuality along with their intellect. (Paul is one of those who teach that Gay people don’t really exist).

Paul’s job involves talking endlessly about homo-sex to other men. Being a Catholic priest and spending lots of time hanging out with homosexual guys suggests that Paul has issues of his own concerning sexuality. If my suspicions are correct, Paul’s is the greater tragedy. He will never have the option to bring a future husband to meet his oh-so-clever father once he finally realizes his life’s work has been a complete sham (which is still the case even if he is Straight).

Perhaps his father’s death takes a tremendous weight off Paul’s shoulders. Should he now decide to marry a man, he and his beloved won’t have to deal with the homophobic dad who ruined the better part of his life.

Mickey Weems is a writer, educator and creator of The Qualia Encyclopedia of Gay Folklife.

Email him at mickeyweems@yahoo.comVisit qualiafolk.com, mickeyweems.com, or . Look for his next column in the May issue of Outlook.

We hope Congress doesn’t impede President Obama’s choice for the next Supreme Court justice.

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Out & About in

Northwest Ohio Some Like It Hot • WOW Symposium • Toledo Troopers

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 2 Gender, Sex and Identity in Sport: Trans and Intersex Athletes @ Bowling Green State University Women’s Center, 107 Hanna Hall, Bowling Green, 43403; 419.372.7227; bgsu.edu/womens-center: Are policies designed to support the inclusion of transgender and intersex athletes leading to an excessive policing of female bodies in order to confer eligibility? Professors Vikki Krane and Alexx Klein of BGSU’s School of Human Movement share data and discuss NCAA policy. Noon.

THURSDAY, MARCH 10 Karaoke Night @ Mojo, 115 N. Erie St., Toledo, 43604; 567.315.8333; FB: Mojo’s: Every Thursday, it’s karaoke at Mojo. And there are drink specials, too, in case you need a little help convincing you to share your rendition of “I Will Survive.” 8p.

FRIDAY, MARCH 11 Psycho @ Valentine Theatre, 410 Adams St., Toledo, 43604; 419.242.2787; valentinetheatre.com: Anthony Perkins is the ultimate mama’s boy as Norman Bates in this Alfred Hitchcock thriller.

7:30p; $5.

SATURDAY, MARCH 12 Some Like It Hot @ Valentine Theatre, 410 Adams St., Toledo, 43604; 419.242.2787; valentinetheatre.com: This madcap comedy is quintessential Marilyn with a side of drag. The film was voted the top comedy on AFI’s 100 Years…

100 Laughs poll in 2000.

7:30p; $5.

TUESDAY, MARCH 15 VOTE! It’s Primary Election Day across Ohio and time to register your choice for your party’s presidential and U.S. Senate nominees, as well as nominees for Congress, the Ohio House and Senate, and county offices. Visit myohiovote.com to find 26

march 2016

“I wanna be loved by you alo-o-one. Boop boop bee doo.”

your polling place or track your absentee ballot.

SATURDAY, MARCH 19 Women of the World Symposium @ Roy C. Start High School, 2010 Tremainsville Rd., Toledo, 43613; FB: 2016 WOW Symposium: The event started in 2013 is a collaboration of many women’s organizations in Northwest Ohio. The day includes entertainment, a marketplace and speakers on timely topics that affect women. 8:30a; $15.

SUNDAY, MARCH 20 Equality Toledo Film Series: Pride @ Ohio Theatre & Event Center, 3114 Lagrange St., Toledo, 43608; 419.407.6225; equalitytoledo.org: It’s a free showing of the 2014 film about the true story of LGBT activists in Britain who bonded with striking Welsh mineworkers in 1984. After the film, folks from the Northwest Ohio labor movement and LGBT community will talk about our common interests.

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 23 Sport and the Construction of Gendered Identities @ Bowling Green State University Women’s Center, 107 Hanna Hall, Bowling Green, 43403; 419.372.7227; bgsu.edu/womens-center: Three presentations look at various constructions of gendered identities: from women who run, to youth softball players, to international student bodybuilders. Noon.

An Evening With the Winningest Team in ProFootball History @ BGSU’s Bowen Thompson Student Union, Room 202B, Bowling Green, 43403; 419.372.7227; bgsu.edu/womens-center: Members of the Toledo Troopers, a women’s football team that won seven consecutive national titles from 1971 to 1977, will share their stories. 7p. outlookohio.com

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Out & About in Out & About in

Northeast Ohio Bi+ 101 • Lunafest • The Divas of Drag • Bear Picnic

SATURDAY, MARCH 5 Danez Smith: Poetry, Activism and Politics @ Cat in the Cream Coffeehouse, Hales Annex 180 W. Lorain St., Oberlin, 44074; 440.775.8279; thecatinthecream.com: The St. Paul, Minn., artist and activist’s work illuminates the politicization of black, queer bodies and injustices that occur against black queer people. 8p. Smith will lead a poetry workshop on Sunday, March 6 at 2p.

Equality Rocks: A Battle of the Bands @ The Bevy in Birdtown, 12112 Madison Ave., Lakewood, 44107; FB: Human Rights Campaign Cleveland: Northeast Ohio’s top equality-minded bands battle it out for your votes. If you’re interested in performing, email michael.mcdonnell1234@gmail.com.

8p; $15.

outlookohio.com

We seriously can’t stop laughing at the photo of the picnicking bear.

MONDAY, MARCH 21 Team Cleveland Night at the Cavaliers @ Quicken Loans Arena, 1 Center Court, Cleveland, 44115; Blazing River Freedom Band: Mouse Magic @ teamcle.org: The umbrella group of LGBT sports Archwood United Church of Christ, 2800 Archwood leagues in Northeast Ohio has organized a group Ave., Cleveland, 44109; 321.745.7420; blazingriver- outing to see the Cavs play Denver. Visit the Team band.org: The LGBT concert band performs the CLE website to order your tickets. 7p; $40. music of Disney from Aladdin, The Little Mermaid, Cars and many more. 7p; $5 suggested donation.

FRIDAY, MARCH 25 Bi+ 101 @ Case Western Reserve University LGBT Center, Tinkham Veale University Center Room 179, SUNDAY, MARCH 6 Cleveland Bears Winter Picnic @ Strawberry Lane 11038 Bellflower Rd., Cleveland, 44106; Pavilion, North Chagrin Reservation Metropark, 216.368.5428; FB: Case Western Reserve Univer3037 Som Center Rd., Willoughby Hills, 44094; sity’s LGBT Center: Faith Cheltenham, president of clevelandbears.org: Bring a hot or cold dish to BiNet USA, will cover the basics of the bisexual, share, and dress appropriately. This picnic is pansexual, fluid, queer (bi+) community, its hisgoing on, rain or shine.1:30p-4:30p. tory, public policy challenges and recommendations on making groups more inclusive to bisexual communities.

THURSDAY, MARCH 10 Akron Community Foundation: For 9a.

Women, Forever @ Hilton Akron/Fairlawn, 3180 W. Market St., WEDNESDAY, MARCH 30 Akron, 44333; 330.376.8522; akroCleveland International Film ncf.org: The annual dinner of the Akron Festival @ Tower City Cinemas, 230 W. Community Foundation’s Women’s EndowHuron Rd #7256, Cleveland, 44113; ment Fund raises money to support the health, 216.621.1374; clevelandfilm.org: The festival alsafety and economic empowerment of local women ways includes many films that are LGBT-focused or and girls. 5:30p; $75. are made by LGBT filmmakers. Tickets cost $14 for members and $16 for the general public. Visit the website for a list of films and show times.

TUESDAY, MARCH 15 VOTE! It’s Primary Election Day across Ohio and time to register your choice for your party’s pres- Theater: Big Love @ Baldwin Wallace Univeridential and U.S. Senate nominees, as well as sity’s Kleist Center, 95 E. Bagley Rd., Berea, nominees for Congress, the Ohio House and Sen- 44017; 440.826.2240; bw.edu/tickets: This modate, and county offices. Visit myohiovote.com to ern twist to the Greek play The Suppliants raise find your polling place or track your absentee issues of gender politics, love and domestic vioballot. lence. 7:30p; $10. Performances are scheduled through Sunday, April 3.

SATURDAY, MARCH 19 Lunafest Women’s Film Festival @ UnitarTHURSDAY, MARCH 31 ian Universalist Church of Akron, 3300 The Divas of Drag @ House of Blues, Morewood Dr., Fairlawn, 44333; 308 Euclid Ave., Cleveland, 44114; 330.701.6887; lunafest.org: Lunafest 216.523.2583; is a traveling women’s film festival houseofblues.com/cleveland: A that raises money for national and dozen drag queens - Trixie Mattel, local women’s groups. Six shorts - inLatrice Royale, Alyssa Edwards, cluding Raising Ryland, the story of two Kennedy Davenport, Milk, Mimi Imfurst, loving parents and their transgender 6Mystique Summers, Penny Tration, Gia year-old - are on the marquee. 4p; $10-$12.

Gunn, Laganja Estranja, Vicky Vox and Wendy Ho take the stage in this national tour. 8p; $30. march 2016

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Out &Out About & in About in

Southwest Ohio Q3 • Alaska • HRC Gala • Rihanna • Miss Northside

TUESDAY, MARCH 1 Newsies @ Aronoff Center, 650 Walnut St., Cincinnati, 45202; 513.721.3344; cincinnati.broadway.com: A company of athletic men singing and jumping in tight-fitting knickers?

Yes, please. The musical about the newsboy strike of 1899 runs through Sunday, March 13. 7:30p; $20.75-$95.75.

THURSDAY, MARCH 3 Queer Queens of Qomedy @ Go Bananas Comedy Club, 8410 Market Place Lane, Montgomery, 45242; 513.984.8848; gobananascomedy.com: Lesbian comics Poppy Champlin, Mimi Gonzalez and Karen Williams bring a tour that’s been going on for 11 years to Cincinnati for the first time. 7p; $24 ($40 VIP).

Alaska @ The Cabaret, 1122 Walnut St., Cincinnati, 45202; 513.202.4052; FB: The Cabaret: Penny Tration hosts a performance by the RPDR legend. There are a limited number of tickets because of the Cabaret’s size, so it’d be wise to get yours early. 9p; $20.

SATURDAY, MARCH 5 2016 HRC Cincinnati Gala @ Horseshoe Casino Cincinnati, 1000 Broadway St., Cincinnati, 45202; hrccincygala.com: Celebrate our recent victories and help the Human Rights Campaign continue its work for full equality. 6p; $150-$275.

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 9 2016 Presidential Race: James Carville, Ann Compton, Alex Castellanos @ Miami University’s Armstrong Student Center, Harry T. Wilks Theater, 550 E. Spring St., Oxford, 45056; miamioh.edu/janus: A week before the Ohio primary, the three political pundits will discuss the race so far. The public is invited to the free talk, but tickets are required.

7:30p.

SATURDAY, MARCH 12 Cincinnati Rollergirls Season Opener @ Cincinnati Gardens, 2250 Seymour Ave., Cincinnati, 45212; 513.631.7793; cincinnatirollergirls.com: It’s a double-header. The Black Sheep (varsity) and Violent Lambs (junior varsity) both skate. 6p; $14-$17 ($12-$15 in advance).

find your polling place or track your absentee ballot.

THURSDAY, MARCH 17 Diversity Film Series: Tangerine @ University of Cincinnati’s Tangeman University Center Cinema, Cincinnati 45220; 513.556.4329; uc.edu/lgbtq: The 2015 film is a comedy-drama about a transgender sex worker who discovers her boyfriend/pimp is cheating on her with a cis woman. 7:30p.

Carly Rae Jepsen @ Madison Theater, 728 Madison Ave., Covington, Ky., 41011; 859.655.4800; madisontheateronline.com: Pretend it’s 2012 all over again and hope Carly Rae plays her earworm “Call Me Maybe” at least twice. 8p; $25-$28.

FRIDAY, MARCH 18 Mothers and Sons @ Thompson Shelterhouse, Cincinnati Playhouse in the Park, 962 Mt. Adams Circle, Cincinnati, 45202; 513.421.3888; cincyplay.com: The drama about a mother’s love and anger about her dead son’s lover starting a new life was written by Pulitzer Prize-winner Terrence McNally. Opening night is Pride Night and includes a pre- and post-show reception partially benefitting GLSEN. Performances run through April 17. 8p; $30$95.

Miss Magical Makeover @ Shooters, 927 Race St., Cincinnati, 45202; FB: Miss Magical Makeover: Calling all never-before queens! Now’s your chance to let your inner diva sparkle in the name of charity.

To compete or perform, contact ISQCCBE members Connie Lynne Guiste-McCoy, Alana Reign or Owen Cash via Facebook. 11p.

SATURDAY, MARCH 19 Rihanna @ U.S. Bank Arena, 100 Broadway St., Cincinnati, 45202; 51.421.4111; usbankarena.com: She may have backed out of performing at the Grammy Awards, but Rihanna plans to “shine bright like a diamond” in the Queen City. 7:30p; $30.50-$575.

SUNDAY, MARCH 20 Miss Northside Drag Competition @ Below Zero Lounge, 1120 Walnut St., 45202; 513.619.1483; caracole.org: Caracole staff, board members, volunteers and supporters compete for the title of Miss TUESDAY, MARCH 15 VOTE! It’s Primary Election Day across Ohio and Northside 2016. They’ll be helped along by members time to register your choice for your party’s pres- of the Imperial Sovereign Queen City Court of the idential and U.S. Senate nominees, as well as Buckeye Empire, and all proceeds help the HIV/AIDS nominees for Congress, the Ohio House and Sen- services agency. 7:30p. ate, and county offices. Visit myohiovote.com to

28

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Read our interview with Queer Queen of Qomedy Karen Williams at outlookohio.com.

outlookohio.com

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Out & About in

Western Ohio

Spring Awakening • Mamma Mia! • Rainbow Club

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 2 MONDAY, MARCH 14 College Night @ Club Masque, 20 N. Jefferson St., Mamma Mia! @ Clark State Community College Dayton, 45402; Performing Arts Center, 300 S. Fountain Ave., 937.228.2582; clubSpringfield, 45506; 937.328.3874; clarkmasque.com: Every state.edu: On the eve of her wedding, a Wednesday, shots daught... eh, who are we kidding? It’s are cheap and got ABBA music! 7:30p; $32-$58. the dance music is playing TUESDAY, MARCH 15 on two floors.

VOTE! It’s Primary Election Day 8p; $5. across Ohio and time to register your choice for your party’s presidential and U.S. Senate nominees, as well FRIDAY, as nominees for Congress, the Ohio House MARCH 4 Spring Awakening @ and Senate, and county offices. Visit myBeavercreek Community Theatre, 3868 ohiovote.com to find your polling Dayton-Xenia Rd., Beavercreek, place or track your absentee 45432; 937.429.4737; ballot. bctheatre.org: The rock musical that deals with teenage sexuThe Bridges of Madiality garnered eight Tony son County @ SchusAwards and a Grammy ter Center, 1 W. 2nd Award after its premiere in St., Dayton, 45402; 2006. Performances run 937.228.7591; victothrough March 13. 8p. Call riatheatre.com: A musibox office for ticket prices. cal based on the best-selling novel that tells the story of an Iowa housewife SATURDAY, MARCH 5 Rainbow Club @ Always Ballroom, 552 who has a whirlwind affair with a Wilmington Ave., Dayton, 45420; 937.256.2626; traveling photographer. While it was only on FB: Dayton Rainbow Club: AlBroadway for three months, it did win two ways Ballroom dance stuTony Awards for Best Original Score dio hosts a monthly and Best Orchestration. 8p; $25dance night for the $82.

LGBT community, that includes inMONDAY, struction. And MARCH 21 there’s a cash bar Movie Night @ MJ’s on Jefin case you need ferson, 20 N. Jefferson St., some liquid courage Dayton, 45402; to do your thing. A por937.223.3259; tion of the proceeds will mjsonjefferson.com: The LGBT benefit PFLAG. 8p-10p; $15. classic movie changes every Monday, but the popcorn’s always free. 9p.

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 9 Ailey II: The Next Generation of Dance @ FRIDAY, MARCH 25 Clark State Community College PerCeltic Woman @ forming Arts Center, 300 S. Fountain Schuster Center, 1 W. Ave., Springfield, 45506; 2nd St., Dayton, 937.328.3874; clarkstate.edu: 45402; The dance company founded by 937.228.7591; Alvin Ailey will perform his signacelticwoman.com: ture work, Revelations. 7p; $33The melodic Irish $39. lasses will stop in Cincinnati on March Drag Queen Bingo @ MJ’s on Jeffer24, Dayton on March son, 20 N. Jefferson St., Dayton, 45402; 25, Columbus on March 937.223.3259; 26 and Cleveland on March 29. mjsonjefferson.com: 11p.

7:30p; $48-$108. outlookohio.com

If you change your mind... I’m the first in line. Honey I’m still free; take a chance on me.

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Out & About in

Central Ohio Q3 • Arnold Sports Festival • The Full Monty

TUESDAY, MARCH 1 Bi-ographies: Community Storytelling and Connection @ Stonewall Columbus, 1160 N High St, Columbus, 43201; 614.299.7764; FB: Bi Local: Bi Local and BiNet Columbus kick off Bisexual Health Awareness Month with a night of sharing our individual stories to build relationships and community. Email bilocal614@gmail.com to request a storytelling spot or for more information. 7p-8:30p WEDNESDAY, MARCH 2 Queer Queens of Qomedy @ Funny Bone Comedy Club, 145 Easton Station, Columbus, 43219; 614.471.5653; columbusfunnybone.com: Lesbian comics Poppy Champlin, Mimi Gonzalez and Karen Williams continue a tour that’s been going on for more than a decade. 7p; $25 ($40 for VIP).

Columbus Stompers Dance Night @ the Back Door, 1662 W. Mound St., Columbus, 43223; stompers.org: The LGBT country dance club bootscoots out to the new West Side gay bar. There’s plenty of parking and no cover.

8p.

THURSDAY, MARCH 3 Arnold Sports Festival @ Greater Columbus Convention Center, 400 N. High St., Columbus, 43215; 614.431.2600; arnoldsportsfestival.com: “The Arnold” is the largest multi-sport festival in the nation and hosts more than 18,000 athletes competing in 70 sports and events. Visit the website for the schedule of competitions and exhibits that run through Sunday, March 6. $15-$20 for general admission; $350$650 for VIP packages.

SATURDAY, MARCH 5 Capital Pride Band: Out of This World @ Lincoln

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Theatre, 769 E. Long St., Columbus, 43203; 614.325.1590; cappride.org: The LGBT concert band’s spring concert is one night only. In addition to the music, singing and dancing, band leaders promise an “instrumental surprise.” 8p; $20.

MONDAY, MARCH 7 Transgender Wellness Night @ Stonewall Columbus, 1160 N High St, Columbus, 43201; 614.299.7764; stonewallcolumbus.org: As part of Stonewall’s Health and Wellness Month, general transition-related info will be available, as well as local provider information. Meet others and have your questions about transitioning answered. 6p9p. Another Transgender Wellness Night is scheduled for Tuesday, March 29.

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 9 Assisted Reproduction Technology Information Night @ Stonewall Columbus, 1160 N High St, Columbus, 43201; 614.299.7764; stonewallcolumbus.org: As part of Stonewall’s Health and Wellness Month, the Family Pride Network is helping to host a session with legal and assisted reproduction experts to discuss pathways to parenthood for LGBT couples. 6:30p-8:30p.

FRIDAY, MARCH 11 Columbus Gay Men’s Chorus: Big Gay Sing @ Lincoln Theatre, 769 E. Long St., Columbus, 43203; 614.228.2462; columbusgaymenschorus.com: Nina West hosts the chorus’ annual singalong of Broadway showstoppers. Jumbo screens will display the lyrics, but no self-respecting queer person will need to peek, right?! 8p; $30. Two more shows are scheduled: Saturday, March 12, at 8p, and Sunday, March 13, at 3p.

SATURDAY, MARCH 12 Slammers 16th Annual Pub Crawl @ Slammers,

202 E. Long St., Columbus, 43215; 614.221.8880; FB: Slammers: The crawl - and you likely will be crawling by the time it’s over starts and ends at Slammers but hits Cray, Exile, Union, Axis, Mike’s, Level, Mac’s, Fabian’s and Short North Tavern in between. The whole day is done to benefit Pets Without Parents.

10a.

TUESDAY, MARCH 15 VOTE! It’s Primary Election Day across Ohio and time to register your choice for your party’s presidential and U.S. Senate nominees, as well as nominees for Congress, the Ohio House and Senate, and county offices. Visit myohiovote.com to find your polling place or track your absentee ballot.

THURSDAY, MARCH 17 St. Patrick’s Day @ Cavan Irish Pub, 1409 S. High St., Columbus, 43207; 614.725.5502; FB: Cavan Irish Pub: The party starts early and goes all day at Columbus’ LGBT Irish bar. Kegs n Eggs kicks off the day, and there’s a happy hour from 2p-8p.

And draft beer is $1 off for the rest of the night.

6a.

SATURDAY, MARCH 19 LGBT Hiking Club @ Three Creeks Metro Park, 3860 Bixby Rd., Groveport, 43125; 614.930.2265; stonewallcolumbus.org: Stonewall’s monthly hiking excursions cover trails for all levels of fitness.

They’re on the third Saturday of every month.

10:30a.

Lesbian Tennis Mixer @ Olympic Indoor Tennis Club, 3480 Indianola Ave., Columbus, 43214; 614.299.7764; stonewallcolumbus.org: You’re welcome to participate in the monthly doubles mixer no matter what your skill level. It’s limited to 16 women, so register early online. 4p-6p; $10.

Adore Delano @ Axis, 775 N. High St., Columbus, 43215; 614.291.4008; axisonhigh.com: Freesia Balls and Amanda Sue host the RPDR’s latest Columbus appearance. 10p; $10-$20 (tables are $50-$100).

SUNDAY, MARCH 20 Community Conversation on Healthcare for Bi+ Identities @ Equality Ohio, 118 E. Main St., Suite 200, Columbus, 43215; FB: Bi Local: Bi+ folks are less likely to have access to insurance or financial resources for health care. Join the conversation about these health concerns and other health issues in the bi+ community. 4p-5:30p.

MONDAY, MARCH 21 PrEP/PEP Talk With ARC Ohio @ Stonewall Columbus, 1160 N High St, Columbus, 43201; 614.299.7764; stonewallcolumbus.org: As part of Stonewall’s Health and Wellness Month, ARC Ohio’s Zach Reau will cover everything you need to know about the pill to prevent HIV, as well as a post-exposure pill called PEP. 6:30p-7:30p.

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 30 Become an LGBT Foster Parent! @ Stonewall Columbus, 1160 N High St, Columbus, 43201; 614.299.7764; stonewallcolumbus.org: As part of Stonewall’s Health and Wellness Month, learn more about the many benefits of becoming a foster parent or a mentor and hear how you or someone you know can help a child in need. 6:30p-8p.

THURSDAY, MARCH 31 Evenings With Authors: Augusten Burroughs @ Thurber House, 77 Jefferson Ave., Columbus, 43215; 614.464.1032; thurberhouse.org: The gay memoirist of best selling Running with Scissors and Dry will speak about writing and his work. 7:30p; $18-$20.

The Full Monty @ The Garden Theater, 1187 N. High St., Columbus, 43201; 614.725.4042; shortnorthstage.org: What do factory workers do when they get laid off?

Stage a strip act, of course! The Short North Stage will put on the Tony Award-winning musical based on the cult film through April 17. 8p; $25-$40.

Did you hear the one about the three lesbians who walked into a comedy club?

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South Carolina

trippin’ out

Master Storyteller Brings Charleston’s African-American Heritage to Life

by Aaron Leventhal

If you plan on vacationing down South this year, route yourself through Charleston, S.C., to experience Alphonso Brown’s celebrated Gullah Tours.

Southern Living magazine named it one of Charleston’s top five city tours. I took Brown’s informative and highly entertaining two-hour small bus tour earlier this winter.

He is a first-rate storyteller, and I was impressed with his knowledge and passion for his subject.

Born and raised in rural Rontowles, S.C., just south of Charleston, the 70-year-old Brown was educated through high school in segregated schools. He earned a degree in music from South Carolina State University and a master’s from Southern Illinois University, then served as music director for the Charleston County School District until retirement.

He has operated his Gullah Tours for the past 30 years as both driver and certified guide.

Brown begins every tour by explaining that Gullah is an English-based Creolized language believed to be a mispronunciation of Gola, a tribe that lived in the West African nation of Sierra Leone. Most slaves actually knew some English before coming to the New World, due to their contact with European colonists.

He points out that when he was growing up, all black residents of the Lowcountry spoke a form of Gullah but never knew they were speaking a unique language. “It was thought to be bad English, and we were ridiculed for using it.”

In reality, most were bilingual, speaking both Gullah and English. Throughout his tour, Alphonso sprinkled Gullah phrases through his narrative. “Mah head leeb me” (I forgot). outlookohio.com

“Tie yuh mout” (hush/stop talking). “E clean gon’” (he left a long time ago).

Brown’s personal mission goes beyond the typical tour. “I want to educate both blacks and whites (85 percent of his passengers are white) that the slaves and free blacks were not ignorant people. All the negative stereotypes are untrue. Many slaves came with agricultural and construction skills.”

“Senator John C. Calhoun was one of the South’s most revered statesmen and a vociferous segregationist. It’s thought he was Lena Horne’s great-grand uncle. Blacks hated Calhoun for his stand on slavery.”

Methodist Episcopal Church at 110 Calhoun St. Originated in 1791 as the “Free African Society,” consisting of free blacks and slaves, the church was burned down by whites in 1834. It was rebuilt in 1865, then destroyed by an earthquake; its current structure, with its Gothic design, was completed in 1892.

• At the United Methodist Church, he explained that the congregation was the kindest and most lenient toward their slaves. “Blacks that were blood-related were referred to as ‘friends,’” acknowledging that they could be someone’s great uncle or grandfather. He noted that Charleston never segregated its churches or housing. In fact, only at the Methodist cemeteries were whites buried in the front of the graveyards and blacks in the back.

In its history, the church has hosted addresses by Booker T. Washington, the Rev. Martin Luther King Jr., and Coretta Scott King.

It was the site of the June 2015 attack in which nine people were killed during bible study by a white supremacist.

• At the modest home of Philip Simmons, an internationally renowned blacksmith celebrated for designing and crafting more than 500 decorative iron gates, we stopped to watch his nephew forge a work in the back shed.

And, of course, his tour would not be complete without the historic Emanuel African

Alphonso Brown has written a fascinating book, A Gullah Guide to Charleston: Walking Through Black History, published by the History Press of Charleston (www.historypress.net). It provides addresses for dozens of landmarks with an introduction in Gullah followed by an informative English interpretation.

Tours are offered twice daily, Monday-Saturday. For information and reservations, call 843.763.7551 or visit gullahtours.com.

Columbus-based travel writer Aaron Leventhal also operates small group tours. His next trip will be Michael Moore’s Traverse City Film Festival in late July. Check it out at LeventhalTravel.com or email leventhal43206 @gmail.com for more information.

As we drove through the various downtown districts, he wove compelling stories with historical information. We learned that 40 percent of the entire country’s slave trade came through Charleston because of its strategic location in the South. He also spoke about the significant contributions slaves and free blacks made to the development of Charleston, which by the early 1800s was the fourth-largest and one of the wealthiest cities in the United States.

Among the landmarks on our tour: • As we passed Calhoun Street, he quipped: Oh, Caskey! How we’ve missed your coupons!

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savage love

by Dan Savage

Ethnocized and Objectified

by Dan Savage My husband is Native American. I’m white. We’ve been together 16 years, raising a couple kids. We love each other very much, so this isn’t a deal breaker.

Why would you call blumkins sexist? Are you excluding the idea that gay, bi and trans people might participate? There are many sexual practices that are degrading. If the partner consents, how is it sexist?

I’ve got a thing for his long black hair. He’s a drop-dead gorgeous man, and while I gave up asking that he wear leggings or a breechcloth once in a while, I wish he would grow out his hair.

I’m willing to wear (and do) anything he asks. He’s somewhere to the left of Sherman Alexie when it comes to this stuff, but could you tell me why I’m so wrong?

Lastly, have you considered that a heterosexual female may want a blumkin of her own? I’m a heterosexual male, and I have no idea how you could defecate and remain erect - but to each his own! Your answer was irrational and sexist!

He keeps his hair short, and the one time I made enough of a fuss, he grew it out and never washed it just to spite me. A long time ago, he participated in a sun dance, and he looked incredible.

Go to Urban Dictionary and read every definition for blumkin, TPIAS. There are nine of them. We’ll wait.

- The Problem Isn’t Always Sexism

While almost all of the proposed definitions - including the top one - are gendered (“Taking a nice shit while your woman is sucking your cock”), even definitions that aren’t gendered (“Getting a blowjob while taking a stinky shit”) include examples of usage that are gendered (“Anthony really enjoyed it when Christy gave him a blumkin last night”).

So I guess that makes me a blasphemous pervert, but really? Is asking for a couple of braids really so wrong?

- Whitey McWhite Wife I forwarded your e-mail to Sherman Alexie, the award-winning poet, novelist, essayist, and filmmaker. Your question must have touched a nerve, WMW, because Alexie’s response arrived while my computer was still making that wooooshsending-e-mail sound. Now I’m going to step aside and let Alexie answer your question...

While a gay dude could suck his man’s cock while he was taking a stinky shit, the whole conversation about blumkins - and since blumkins are mythical, TPIAS, the convo is all we’ve got - isn’t about consensual degrading sex play.

It’s about the symbolic degradation of women.

“What does ‘to the left of Sherman Alexie’ mean in this context? I doubt there are very many Native dudes more leftist than me! And long hair on Indian men is more conservative and more tribal, anyway - more ceremonial. More of a peacock thing, really.

“And a lot of work! My Native wife certainly misses my long hair.

But I don’t miss the upkeep and I don’t miss answering questions about my hair. I mean, I cut my hair 13 years ago (more than 25 percent of my life ago), and some people still ask me about it!

Thirteen years! Also, Native men tend to cut their hair as they age.

Long hair is generally a young Indian man’s gig, culturally speaking.

“I would venture that Native dude is tired of being romanticized, ethnocized, objectified. We Indians get enough of that shit in the outside world. Maybe this dude doesn’t want that in bed. Or maybe he just likes the way he looks with shorter hair. Because I am getting so gray, long hair would make me look like a warlock having a midlife crisis. Maybe this Indian dude is just sick of all the sociopolitical shit that comes with long hair. Maybe it kills his boner. Talking about it has certainly killed my boner.”

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And that’s sexist.

It’s like gerbiling: Everyone has a butthole, anyone can walk into a pet store and buy a gerbil, and paper-towel tubes are everywhere.

But gerbiling is always described as a gay sex act. The fact that straight, bi, asexual or even deceased people could theoretically have their asses gerbiled doesn’t make joking about gerbiling not homophobic.

The anatomical technicality doesn’t exonerate gerbiling. Same goes for blumkins.

So my ruling is final: Joking about gerbiling is homophobic (but funny if done right), just as joking about blumkins is sexist (ditto).

You can email Dan Savage at mail@savagelove.net, follow him on Twitter at @fakedansavage or listen to his weekly podcast, Savage Lovecast, every Tuesday at thestranger.com/savage. Savage Love appears every month in Outlook and every week at outlookohio.com.

Blumpkin stories always involve a friend’s cousin’s girlfriend who lives in Canada.

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the divine life

by Debé

Cancer

ending, your momentum was building but then it fizzled out. Since you don’t do anyYou’re tempted to retreat into your shell, afraid to put thing halfway, you find that yourself out there. Don’t be. really frustrating. Don’t With all that creative energy worry; it happens to all of us. at your disposal, you’ll be the Regroup. fresh catch of the day. Everyone wants you.

Capricorn (June 21 - July 22)

Pisces

(February 19 March 20)

(December 22 January 19)

Leo

(July 23 - August 22)

It’s your month to swim in the fast lane. The solar eclipse in your sign on the 9th has you more self-aware than usual, and you’re filled with energy and love. That makes you hot enough to melt snow. Nothing can stop you now!

You thought you’d reached the summit and had what you wanted, but you are never satisfied for long.

There’s always another mountain to climb or conquest to make. Lions need to roar, baby!

Fabulous Fishes:

(August 23 September 22)

Virgo

Ke$ha, Chaz Bono, Drew BarWhere is that control freak rymore, Wanda Sykes we all know and love/hate?

Your OCD is surprisingly MIA. Aries I don’t know who you are, but (March 21 - April 19) run out and play while you The roller coaster ride you’re can. I’m sure the headon slows down just long mistress will be back soon. enough to let you regroup and get your bearings before it takes off again. Keep your Libra (September 23 hands and legs inside the October 22) ride at all times. This is Ready to be loud and proud going to be scary fun! and take on the world? Good for you, but remember there Taurus will always be someone try(April 20 - May 20) ing to pee in your cornflakes.

You might be telling yourself Don’t get mad - get even by that your dreams are just being even more fabulous. fantasies, but change is in the air. If you harness that change (or that hottie), you Scorpio can make some of those fan- (October 23 November 21) tasies a reality. Harness?

Life is good and the world’s Fantasy? Yee-haw! your stage, but you can do even better. Don’t let your inner Gemini heckler trip you into the or(May 21 - June 20) As much as you like to be in chestra pit, and don’t get comthe center of activity, some- placent. Keep your drive alive.

(Cue the Rocky soundtrack). times you need to sit back and watch things play out.

Sagittarius Tap into your inner voyeur (November 22 and get your kicks while avoiding being kicked. Much December 21) Like good sex with no happy safer. outlookohio.com

You’ve got a lot of balls in the air and are afraid you’ll drop one. Chillaxe. They’re balls, not chainsaws. That white-knuckled control isn’t

necessary. If you miss, C’est la vie. Life goes on, and they might not even notice.

Aquarius

(January 20 February 18)

I say this with mad love: You can be a real drama queen this month. Please try to rein that in before your friends fit you for a tiara. We all need to vent, but put some of that energy into positive action instead.

Handy Tip: The Big Heart

The “big heart” heart line curves up under the index (Jupiter) finger. This line is found on very generous people who tend to put others first. It’s hard for them to say no to anyone in need, and they’re great partners to someone worthy of their loving spirit.

Debé is a palmist, intuitive adviser and metaphysical teacher in Columbus.

She is available for personal readings, parties, events and workshops.

For more information, go to thepassionatepalmist.com.

Look for her horoscopes every month in Outlook.

May the luck of the Irish be with all our Pisces friends this month!

Sponsored by

Outlook Ohio Magazine

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lesbians 101

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Look for Lesson 3 of Lesbians 101 in our April issue.

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Gay Things You Do Playing Football Across

1 The Unicorn author Murdoch 5 Famed Loch 9 Sits for 63Across 14 “Queen of Country” McEntire 15 Prefix with potent 16 Give the slip to 17 Give relief to a thief 18 One of Bernstein’s strings 19 Beat off 20 He reaches between the center’s legs 23 Aunt in a Disney film 24 Merchant of films 25 Less likely to come out 27 Computer command 30 Make possible 33 Christopher, to Madonna 36 Former NFL player Tuaolo 38 Seat at the Stonewall Inn 39 Where boxers are visible 41 Sound from guitarist Townshend 43 Engage in some watersports 44 One who gets screwed by an agent?

46 Triangleoutlookohio.com

shaped peninsula 48 ___ Miz 49 Gulliver’s Travels brutes 51 Philippines island 53 The Gay Nineties, for example 55 Alexander conquered it 59 Gone With the Wind extra 61 Where football players get naked together 64 Video category for porn 66 Royal threesome 67 Go down 68 Release from bondage 69 “How queer!”

70 Sea eagle 71 “See ya” 72 Actor Auberjonois 73 Cannon of Hollywood

V Down 1 Persian Gulf figure 2 [ELK] - [K] + [LEND] - [D] 3 Erection supporter 4 Governor of 55-Across 5 Stein, for one 6 Arab head 7 Stuck-up sort 8 Nancy’s older son, on Weeds 9 Tony of Hollywood

10 Cheer for Lorca 11 Winners of this wear matching rings 12 Rosie O’Donnell’s Exit to ___ 13 Ward of Once and Again 21 Wear down 22 Evita narrator 26 Chows down 28 Randy Shilts’ area 29 Chase behind 31 Dance legend Fuller 32 Shade trees 33 Noise of an ass 34 Costa ___ 35 Where football players pat each other 37 Shakespeare’s Hathaway 40 Sticky stuff 42 A pink triangle symbolizes this 45 Alarm cock?

47 Cicero’s way 50 U. of San Francisco, e.g.

52 Wore away 54 Score for Billy Bean 56 “Pardon me” 57 “___ roll!”

58 Navratilova’s winter home 59 Male actor named Julia 60 John Travolta’s Hairspray role 62 Hourly pay 63 Actor Richard 65 Hwy. to the Hamptons

Fourteen across is Reba. You’re welcome.

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Joan and Judy could face off in our March Sassness on Page 14.

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