The finale to my Durham degree

Dherran Titherington-Bragg shares her expectations for her final term at Durham

There have been many moments over the last three years where I have simply abhorred my degree, the city, and life in Durham. But still, I find myself reeling at the notion that soon it’ll all be some distant memory. Even typing Epiphany term in past tense feels odd. Part of me feels as though I should have slowed down a bit. It’s so easy with the absolute carnage that is one’s dissertation, summatives and looming postgraduate life, to simply forget to look up, and thus miss the final months.

Part of this feeling, I would suggest, stems from the fear of the unknown – not knowing what is next. There is nothing remotely soothing about the limbo phase of needing to have plans for after graduation, and yet possessing none. It’s scary, and it feels as though this limbo phase has crawled and snuck up on me in the night like an intruder.

taken place here. Sure, I notice a friend’s new haircut or di erent sense of style - those changes are instant. It’s the gradual and incremental alterations to people’s work ethic, their accent, their social circles, their social habits, their hopes for the future: that all encapsulate how powerfully short yet potent these three years are.

It’s interesting, because the time spent here feels short, but the change in those around me is drastic. Three years is such a short period of time in the grand scheme of our lives, and yet a large part of our development has so subtly

Editor’s Note

Roshni Suresh Babu

As a finalist myself, I feel as though I am caught in between wanting my tiring degree to end immediately, and wanting to make the most of my precious few weeks at Durham. Post-exams, I anticipate that my calendar will be full and my bank account will become empty to fulfill my Durham bucket list!

My personal wishlist consists of: going to the cat cafe, watching the sunrise from observatory hill, successfully completing the full bar crawl, doing a barbecue in the summer, and more!

My outlook, for instance, has changed exponentially during my time in Durham. I recall my attitude in first year: someone who was perpetually scared of this new city, daunted by the prospect of making an entirely new group of friends, and attempting to flee classist comments about where I came from. Now, I feel a sense of gratitude for being granted the privilege of living in this city, and meeting the people I have. I understand the purpose and importance of participating in groups outside of studies, of building my skillset and genuinely just doing things for the sake of enjoyment. I spent my first-year yearning to get involved in various societies but lacking the guts to just get out and do it. I see now how detrimental that was, and wholeheartedly appreciate my decision to get involved.

Eighteen-year-old me wanted nothing more than for these three years to breeze past in a flash. I wanted to get it over with and return to my comfortable routine (whatever that was). How long it seemed back then, and now how short these final months ahead of me look. Now, more than I ever did as a fresher, I cherish my walks by the river and through the forested areas throughout Durham. Back when I was too scared to venture far from college or central areas, I regrettably missed out on moments such as this. I cherish the beauty of living with my best friends, as chaotic and nightmarish as it often can be. I know now that every time I look at a pile of mounting dirty dishes, and miscellaneous items sprawled across the living room, that one day I won’t have this same burden, and I’ll probably, in a weird way, miss it. So, as I look back on my time with a severe nostalgia, not to mention discomfort at its imminent conclusion, I realise that there is nothing inherently scary about what is next.

Before I reach the end of my degree, I’d like to do a few more night outs before I pack it in for adult life. I wouldn’t mind experiencing a few more late nights of Jimmy’s Woodgates, bad dancing and shit music: followed by greasy food and a debrief the next morning with my equally dishevelled, violently hungover housemates. I suppose I want to act like a student a bit more, just for a bit longer, until I’m not one anymore.

I want to act like a student a bit more, until I’m not one anymore

As I enter my final term of university, I want to remain grateful for the fact that I am here for a limited amount of time. Instead of getting caught up in a countdown of sorts, or a reflection on wasted time, I want to appreciate the moment right now, and benefit from what is left.

stage@palatinate.org.uk