ONE IN 36 CHILDREN HAS AUTISM. WE CHANGE LIVES ONE CHILD AT A TIME.
FOR NEARLY 70 YEARS, MAY INSTITUTE HAS PROVIDED EXCEPTIONAL CARE TO AUTISTIC CHILDREN AND THOSE WITH OTHER SPECIAL NEEDS.
OUR SER VICES ARE B ASED ON APPLIED BEH AVIOR AN A L YSIS (AB A):
Special edu cation schools for autism and developmental disabilities
Center-based services for to ddlers and you ng children
Early intervention servi ce s
Home-based services
Supportive Technology services
Family F.Y.I.
2024 FAMILY FAVORITE AWARDS
Our annual Family Favorites issue is available online and covers more than 100 different categories, including places to shop and dine, family fun, attractions, school and enrichment programs and health professionals. Available online at BostonParentsPaper. com —just click on Family Favorites in the “Magazines” tab.
Private School Online Open House Calendar
What better way to keep track of all the preschool and private school’s admission events than this handy tool! With over 50 entities participating, check out the Online Open House & Admissions Calendar on BostonParentsPaper.com. Look for the School Open Houses button on the main header bar and tap. Don’t forget to tell them you saw their event on https://bostonparentspaper.com
Keep Lunch Boxes Safe
ASeptember is CLASSICAL MUSIC MONTH
If you aren’t already a fan of the genre, you may be surprised by some of its alleged benefits. Classical music has been shown to help treat insomnia in college students (if only it worked on toddlers!) and a study found that playing it softly while dining actually encouraged people to eat slower and therefore consume fewer calories.
Happy Harvest
While we don’t officially say goodbye to summer until September 22, this year’s Harvest Moon takes place on September 17. Before we had the artificial light that we have today, farmers used the light from the Harvest Moon to tend to their crops after sundown.
s we’re packing our kids’ lunch boxes this school year, the Institute of Food Technologists (IFT) have a few things they’d like parents to keep in mind. For example, make sure you use an insulated container for meals you hope to keep warm. They suggest first filling the container with boiling water, allowing it to stand for a few minutes before emptying. Then add the hot food. This will help keep bacterial contamination and growth to a minimum. And those soft lunch boxes? Rinse them with water or spray with a chlorine sanitizer to keep them clean.
Happy Grandparents Day!
Annually the first Sunday after Labor Day is celebrated as Grandparents Day. The tradition started in 1978 while President Jimmy Carter was in office and has carried through to today because, well, who doesn’t love to honor Grandma and Grandpa? So, whether your child can see theirs in person to offer a hug or have to settle for a phone call, make sure to let ’em know they’re loved.
ADVANCED K-12 MATH PROGRAM
2024/2025
Private School Guide
Coming October
To add your school contact info@bostonparent.com
www.bostonparent.com
Accepting
Pedestrian Safety
STOP! LOOK LEFT, RIGHT, AND LEFT AGAIN
W
ith back-to-school approaching New England, children and teenagers will be making their daily commute to get educated. Whether walking to a friend’s house after school, going to the local park, or taking the family dog for a stroll— it is likely your child will need to utilize pedestrian safety tips. According to Safe Kids Worldwide, unintentional pedestrian injuries are the fifth leading cause of injury-related deaths in the United States for children ages 5 to 19. It is important not to overestimate your child’s understanding of safe pedestrian habits, especially teenagers. Teenagers account for more than half of all child pedestrian deaths. Shared pedestrian standards can help reduce injuries and deaths; therefore, it is important to educate your children on the rules of the road: both as a pedestrian and as a driver. No matter their age, it is never too late to ensure your children are safe. Here are some fundamental tips to get started on you and your child’s repertoire of pedestrian safety knowledge.
TIP 1
Use sidewalks when available. Sidewalks are the safest place to be on foot, as it is an expected area for drivers to see pedestrians walking. If no sidewalks are available, walk facing traffic and stay as far away from the road as possible. Be especially careful and alert when walking around blind corners.
TIP 2
Remain visible always. At night, it is difficult for drivers to see pedestrians on or near the road from a distance. Wear light clothing colors, carry a flashlight, and wear reflective fabrics if possible. If you know you will be walking in the dark, be prepared by bringing a flashlight. Approximately 75% of teenage pedestrian deaths occur between 7 pm – 7 am.
TIP 3
Cross the street using signals and crosswalks. It is important to build the habit of constantly crossing the street at spots with traffic signals and/or at a crosswalk. Before crossing, make eye contact with the driver to ensure they see you. Always look left, right, and left again before crossing to ensure both cars on either side of the crosswalk acknowledge you. Do this as well despite the “walk” traffic signal, as drivers can run a red light or take a right turn on red. Practice safe crossing with your children, as kids can often underestimate the speed and distance of a traveling car. Y
We Love It! NAPPA Awards
YMAGNA-TILES BUILDER XL
Back to School 2024
By Elena Epstein, Director of the National Parenting Product Awards
A world of construction fun at a super-size level with endless interchangeable pieces like colorful cabs, extending cranes and detachable plow pieces for truck fans to create their own construction vehicles. All pieces work together to create extra-large structures. $99.99, ages 3+, www.magnatiles.com
GUINNESS WORLD RECORDS 2025
Open the next chapter of record breaking. Filled with thousands of facts and feats for the whole family, this new edition celebrates Guinness World Records’ 70th anniversary. Learn how record breaking has changed over the years. $29.95, ages 8+, www.guinnessworldrecords.com
RISE MOM AND BABY BOX
Each box includes items for both mom and baby to celebrate the parenthood journey. For mamas, find recovery and self-care items, along with resources created by perinatal and childhood therapists. For babies, receive developmental toys and books. Every box promises fun, learning, heartwarming moments and cute surprises. $120, ages birth-24 months, www.bloom-and-rise.com
TOSY FLYING DISC
An innovative fusion of technology and outdoor play. With 16.7 million color variations, it elevates disc play to new heights. $49.99, ages 6+, www.tosy.com
BAKIT BOX: POLLINATION EXPLORATION
BUNDLE
A unique subscription service blending education, STEM and culinary skills to spark creativity and curiosity. With three recipes and engaging activity kits included, explore the intricate lives of over 20,000 bee species. Learn how these social insects, with their complex roles from hive maintenance to food foraging, contribute to their communities across the globe. $74.99 per bundle, ages 3+, www.bakitbox.com
DROYD ZYPSTER
A mini electric go-kart providing a fun ride while featuring safety features, including automatic smooth-launch control pedal, electromechanical brake and builtin parental speed controls to lock in its speed at 3 or 6 mph. $209, ages 3-6, www.droyd.com Y
5 Individual Sports for Kids
Parents want their kids to have an active and healthy lifestyle and many sign them up for team sports hoping to help them develop healthy lifelong habits and a love for physical activity. While there are many benefits to team sports, they aren’t always the best fit. Individual sports can be a great alternative to playing on a team especially for kids who have ADHD, sensory processing disorder, or struggle with socialization disorders. Individual sports help kids stay active while building self-esteem and focus. They also learn to set personal goals, and have the opportunity to work one-on-one with the coach. Here are some great individual sports to try and the benefits for your child can gain by participating in each of them.
TENNIS
Hand-eye coordination, speed, agility, gross and fine motor skills, and strong cardiovascular exercise makes tennis a great option for kids who like to keep moving, are quick on their feet, and want the individual attention that comes from one-on-one coaching.
MARTIAL ARTS
Kids who want to learn discipline, respect for others and themselves, balance and coordination, self-control, and work on their listening and focusing skills should consider trying martial arts. This can also become a family sport as all ages are welcome in this activity.
GYMNASTICS
Gymnasts are known for their strength, coordination, flexibility, and discipline. Your child may never become an Olympic gymnast but the confidence and agility they will learn from participating in gymnastics will stick with them.
By Sarah Lyons
SWIMMING
Swimming is a great source of cardiovascular exercise. It also promotes strength, stamina, balance, better posture, and teaches water safety. Swimming, like martial arts, is a sport for all ages. A love of a sport like swimming can turn into a lifetime source of exercise and enjoyment.
RUNNING
While running sports typically start in late elementary school or middle school, it is never too early or late to enjoy. Besides a great cardio workout, running helps develop physical, mental, and personal development as kids overcome challenges and set new goals in distance or time.
If none of the above sports are of interest, you may also want to research fencing, wrestling, cycling, dance, diving, or golf. Many of these sports allow kids to compete on an individual basis while contributing overall to a team. For example, kids competing in gymnastics will receive an individual score but the points go to an overall total for the team. This gives kids the support from teammates without the pressure of having to play on a team. Kids will learn to set and exceed their personal goals and also have the camaraderie that goes along with a team sport. If you notice your child is feeling pressure or frustration from participating in team sports, give an individual sport a try. Y
Sarah Lyons is a freelance writer and mom of six kids including triplets. She enjoys reading, writing, and spending time outdoors with her family.
My daughter was nine years old when she had her first panic attack. She was trembling, out of breath and her heart pounded. These symptoms persisted for almost ten minutes and nothing I said or did could help her calm down. Because her symptoms occurred before her performance in a class play, though, I dismissed it as stage fright.
When she suffered the same symptoms a short time later, this time before a party at her school, I realized something was wrong. Especially when she told me what triggered her intense physical symptoms: she could not stop worrying that something bad would happen to me as I drove to her class party.
Having some anxiety is a normal part of life for most kids. After all, what child doesn’t feel anxious before taking a test or making a presentation in front of the class?
Some children, however, feel worry or fear constantly. According to the Mayo Clinic, anxiety disorders involve “intense, excessive and persistent worry and fear about everyday situations.” Further, such feelings of anxiety and panic “interfere with daily activities, are difficult to control, are out of proportion to the actual danger and can last a long time.”
My daughter was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder after we visited her pediatrician. Now she sees a therapist and takes medication to treat her anxiety. Through her experience, I have learned so much about anxiety disorders in children. I’m sharing what I’ve learned below in hopes of helping other parents and caregivers.
TYPES OF ANXIETY DISORDERS IN CHILDREN
There are several types of anxiety disorders, related to what the worries or fears are about, or how children handle them. According to WebMD, the most common anxiety disorders in kids include the following:
Some children feel worry or fear constantly. According to the Mayo Clinic, anxiety disorders involve “intense, excessive and persistent worry and fear about everyday situations.” Continued on page 13
• Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) is constant worrying about a lot of different things out of proportion to the actual circumstance.
• Panic disorders are characterized by sudden, intense fear that leaves a child feeling physically overwhelmed and out of control, even when there is no danger.
• Separation anxiety is the fear that something bad will happen to a parent or loved one when the child is separated from them. Some separation anxiety is a normal developmental phase for babies and toddlers, but not necessarily for older children.
The latest data from the CDC reports nearly 9.4% of children aged 3-17 had diagnosed anxiety in 2016-2019. That’s 5.8 million kids! And these numbers are projected to increase once data from the COVID-19 pandemic to today are analyzed.
• Social anxiety is extreme anxiety and fear of being embarrassed in social situations, like talking with classmates or answering a question in class. It is more than simple shyness.
The CDC recommends talking to your healthcare provider as a first step. A primary care doctor or mental health specialist can evaluate your child and ensure that your child’s symptoms are caused by anxiety and not another condition, such as trauma.
SYMPTOMS
The most typical symptoms of anxiety disorders in children, per the CDC and WebMD, include:
• Showing anxiety or expressing worry or fear on most days, for weeks at a time.
• Trouble sleeping which may manifest in your child seeming sleepy or tired during the day.
• Difficulty concentrating or thinking about a problem over and over again.
• Unusually irritable and angry.
• Headaches.
• Stomachaches.
• Avoiding school or friends because worries are overwhelming.
• Trouble calming down after leaving a parent or loved one, or extreme homesickness.
HOW TO HELP
The CDC recommends talking to your healthcare provider as a first step. This is what we did in my daughter’s case when we visited her pediatrician. A primary care doctor or mental health specialist can evaluate your child and ensure that your child’s symptoms are caused by anxiety and not another condition, such as trauma.
Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and medication are the most accepted treatments to help children overcome an anxiety disorder according to the Anxiety Disorders Association of America
CBT teaches your child skills and tools to help them feel less anxious and fearful. Through CBT, for instance, my daughter learned to utilize tools like a “worry box”. She’d write down her worry on a piece of paper, then stuff the paper in a box. It was a tangible way to release her fear.
Prescription medication may also help. Parents should work closely with a health care provider to manage the use of medication and monitor your child’s response.
As well, WebMD advocates that parents should let their children know they are available to listen whenever their children are ready to talk. Many kids with anxiety believe their parents won’t understand and thus try to hide their fears. That’s why being ready to listen is so important.
My daughter also joined an anxiety disorder support group at her school, allowing her to connect with peers that understand what she’s going through. As well, I have found support talking to other parents of children with anxiety disorders. So many have been supportive and understanding, making me feel less alone.
Anxiety is a treatable, manageable condition. As parents, we can help kids with anxiety disorders receive the tools, support and love they need to live their healthiest lives possible. Y
Katy M. Clark is a writer and mom of two who celebrates her imperfections on her blog Experienced Bad Mom
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Gen Z: Are they too “good”?
By Alex Ellison
In 2019, I wrote a blog entitled How Latchkey Kids Became Snowplow Parents. I wanted to explore how a generation of kids that was largely left to its own devices in the 90s became a generation of parents raising kids addicted to smartphone devices and completely content staying home with their parents. By smoothing away all obstacles and protecting their kids from the world that exists outside of their phones, Gen X parents might simply be responding to what their kids want; or they may be decelerating a Generation whose internal time clock ticks a little slower. While their Gen X parents couldn’t wait to accelerate into young adult life (Fast Times at Ridgemont High, anyone?), Gen Z has pleaded with society to grow up more slowly. This “Peter Pan” generation may even be afraid of growing up.
Jean Twenge, the preeminent author and researcher on generational trends says Gen Z is driving later, drinking later, having sex later - and much less when they do - getting married later, and signs are pointing to postponing having kids. While their parents started having sex and drinking at a shockingly young age, teens today actually find that behavior disturbing. Generally, these are good trends. Less risky behavior means fewer accidents. They are a proof of the slow-life phenomenon that is a product of safer times (yes, despite what the news might have you think) and of a high-tech age that makes it possible to grow up at a slower pace (more can be done behind a screen and out of the elements). But this isolated generation isn’t necessarily safer. According to Twenge, “For Gen Z, the dangers of the in-person “meatworld” have faded, while the maladies of an indoor, less active, screen-filled life - both mental and physical - have accelerated.” Teens
today might say they feel unsafe and stressed out by the world “out there” but they are their own worst enemies.
The world around us, with the 24hour news cycle and rapid technological innovation, seems to be moving at a blindingly quick pace, yet the barrage of new technologies has also allowed us to grow up more slowly. It’s a strange juxtaposition: a slow-paced life in a fastpaced world.
It’s this contradiction that may be partly why teens are so anxious: they feel they have less agency in an uncertain world, and they don’t feel ready to address the complexities of life.
What’s the result?
A resource-motivated generation obsessed with safety, security, and predictability.
When I first started counseling, I thought I was on a mission to help free the American teenager from oppressive,
boring, and antiquated education. I was a fan of Seth Godin’s Stop Stealing Dreams, and Sir Ken Robinson’s The Element, and A.S. Neil’s Summerhill. I almost launched an alternative school for teens and I was a frequent visitor to the education-innovation conference, SXSWedu (giving a talk there on the topic of Gen Z’s early signs of bizarre practicality). I thought this would be the generation that would challenge the rising cost of tuition, forge a new, more interesting path to higher ed, look for alternatives to outdated expectations, and question conventions. The reality has proven to be much different. With only 5 more years of Gen Z teens still to go (the youngest were born in 1995 and the oldest in 2012), trends have shown a generation that is decidedly risk-averse, money-motivated, and practical.
Continued on page 18 >>>
ARLINGTON
Lesley Ellis School
Free Fall Fun Fair
October 5, 2024 @ 9:00 am
MS Open House
November 19, 2024 @ 7:00 pm 34 Winter St www.lesleyellis.org
BOSTON
The Advent School
All-School Open House
October 16, 2024 @ 9:00 am 15 Brimmer Street www.adventschool.org
Boston Trinity School
Open House
October 19, 2024 @ 12:00 pm
November 19, 2024 @ 6:00 pm 17 Hale Street www.bostontrinity.org
British International School
Open House
October 10, 2024 @ 9:30 am
November 16, 2024 @ 10:00 am December 4, 2024 @ 9:30 am 416 Pond St www.bisboston.org
Middle & High School Fair
Multiple Schools Participating
September 17, 2024 @ 12:00 pm 150 Morrisey Blvd. www.bchigh.edu
Spruce Street Nursery School
Open House
November 2, 2024 1 Avery Pl www.sprucestreet.org
Torit Montessori School
Open House
October 8, 2024 @ 8:30 am
October 24, 2024 @ 4:30 pm
November 12, 2024 @ 8:30 am November 14, 2024 @ 4:30 pm 300 Cambridge St www.toritschool.org
BRAINTREE
Thayer Academy
Open House
October 19, 2024
Middle School @ 8:30 am Upper School @ 9:00 am 745 Washington St www.thayer.org
CAMBRIDGE
Boston Area School Fair
September 28, 2024 @ 10:00 am 80 Trowbridge St www.cambridge-ellis.org
School Admission Events
More Events Online at www.BostonParentsPaper.com
Cambridge Friends School
Open House at CFS
November 4, 2024 @ 10:00 am 5 Cadbury Rd https://cambridgefriendsschool.org
CHESTNUT HILL
Brimmer and May School
Open House
October 20, 2024
November 13, 2024 69 Middlesex Rd www.brimmer.org
The Chestnut Hill School
Open House
October 27, 2024 @ 10:00 am 428 Hammond Street www.tchs.org
DEDHAM
Dedham Country Day School
Open House
October 18, 2024 @ 8:30 am
November 8, 2024 @ 8:30 am
Virtual School Spotlight
November 20, 2024 @ 8:30 am 90 Sandy Valley Rd www.dedhamcountryday.org
EAST SANDWICH
Riverview School
In-Person Information Sessions
September 20, 2024 @ 10:00 am
September 27, 2024 @ 10:00 am
October 11, 2024 @ 10:00 am
Virtual Information Sessions
September 11, 2024
September 24, 2024
October 9, 2024 551 Route 6A www.riverviewschool.org
FALMOUTH
Falmouth Academy
Open House
October 26, 2024 @ 9:30 am 7 Highfield Dr www.falmouthacademy.org
FOXBORO
The Sage School
Open House
November 3, 2024 @ 11:00 am 171 Mechanic St https://sageschool.org
GREAT BARRINGTON
Bard Academy
Open House
November 19, 2024 @ 11:00 am
Bard College at Simon’s Rock
Discovery Days
October 19, 2024 @ 11:00 am 84 Alford Road https://simons-rock.edu
GROTON
Lawrence Academy
Open House
September 28, 2024 @ 1:00 pm 26 Powderhouse Rd www.lacademy.edu
LEXINGTON
Lexington Christian Academy Open House
October 26, 2024 @ 10:00 am 48 Bartlett Ave www.lexingtonchristian.org
MILLIS
Woodside Montessori Academy Open House
November 4, 2024 @ 10:00 am 350 Village St https://woodsideacademy.com
MILTON
Fontbonne, The Early College Open House
October 17, 2024 @ 6:00 pm
November 7, 2024 @ 6:00 pm 930 Brook Rd www.fontbonneboston.org
NATICK
Riverbend School
Children’s Open House
October 5, 2024 @ 10:30 am 33 Eliot St https://riverbendschool.org
NEWTON
The Fessenden School
Open House PreK - Grade 9
September 28, 2024 @ 1:00 pm
First Looks PreK - Grade 4
October 7, 2024@ 1:00 pm First Looks Grades 5-9
October 8, 2024 @ 12:00 pm First Looks Grades 7-9
October 9, 2024 @ 10:30 am 250 Waltham St www.fessenden.org
Jackson Walnut Park School Open House
October 5, 2024 @ 11:30 am
November 7, 2024 @ 9:30 am 200 Jackson Rd www.jwpschools.org
Wellan Montessori School Open House Grades 4-6
November 1, 2024 @ 9:00 am
Open House Age 15 months - Grade 3
November 3, 2024 @ 9:00 am www.wellan.org
READING
Austin Preparatory School
Middle & Upper Open House
October 20, 2024 @ 10:00 am 101 Willow Street www.austinprep.org
SOUTHBOROUGH
Fay School
Open House
November 3, 2024 @ 1:00 pm 48 Main St www.fayschool.org
Tenacre Country Day School
Open House
November 2, 2024 @ 10:00 am 78 Benvenue St. https://www.tenacrecds.org
WELLESLEY
Dana Hall School
Open House
November 2, 2024 @ 1:00 m 45 Dana Rd www.danahall.org
WEST ROXBURY
The Roxbury Latin Open House
September 28, 2024 @ 9:30 am
November 10, 2024 @ 12:00 pm
Information Sessions
October 17, 2024 @ 6:45 pm
October 24, 2024 @ 6:45 pm
November 14, 2024 @ 6:45 pm 101 Saint Theresa Avenue www.roxburylatin.org
WILBRAHAM
Wilbraham & Monson Academy Open House
October 6, 2024 @ 10:00 am 423 Main St www.wma.us
WILLIAMSTOWN
Buxton School
Open House
October 14, 2024 @ 10:00 am 291 South St https://buxtonschool.org
WINCHESTER
Acera School
Information Session
September 17, 2024 @ 7:00 pm
October 8, 2024 @ 9:30 am
November 14, 2024 @ 7:00 pm 5 Lowell Ave www.aceraschool.org
WORCESTER
Bancroft School
Open House
October 10, 2024 @ 6:00 pm
October 27, 2024 @ 1:00 pm 110 Shore Dr www.bancroftschool.org
The trend has continued with Gen Z being perhaps the least fanciful generation in history. Their heads are out of the clouds and their feet are solidly on the ground. Humanities majors are down; business majors are up. Dreams are out; real life is in.
Before the late 70s, American teens went to college to “develop a more meaningful philosophy of life.” By 1980 this meaningful life nonsense was outpaced by another, more practical incentive: financial well-being. The trend has continued with Gen Z being perhaps the least fanciful generation in history. Their heads are out of the clouds and their feet are solidly on the ground. Humanities majors are down; business majors are up. Dreams are out; real life is in.
that spare bedroom into a workout room because these kids won’t be back after college! Right?
If we’re living to 100, maybe we don’t need to get a job at 15, graduate college at 22, start a family at 25, and be retired by 65.
When I survey new students whom I counsel, What class do you wish you had in high school? I rarely see responses like sculpture, creative writing, video game design, extreme sports, or the life of Taylor Swift. Nope…. Personal finance is their top pick. That’s right. They want to learn how to balance a smart budget and do their taxes. These sound like the kids every parent hopes for: well-adjusted, independent, tax-paying citizens. Go ahead and turn
Maybe not. Their slow-life strategy is causing them to put off adult life longer than previous generations. They may rely on their parents later into adulthood because it will take them longer to graduate (maybe with multiple degrees), get a job, buy a house, and get married. In fact, being in a committed relationship is less of a priority for Gen Z than it was for their parents, so they may very well stay attached to the families that raised them rather than raise their own.
So even though Gen Z talks about finance classes and adulting, sensing they need to know about these things, they feel underprepared for and stressed about the future, so they are clinging to what sound like safe plans. When a student tells me what they would love to do “just doesn’t pay well” it’s hard to say how much parents, peers, and social media are influ-
encing them, but it’s likely a combination of all of these. I can’t help but wonder if their bleak life goals are causing them to be less excited about the future. The class of 2024, heading to college this month, was the least excited to graduate and go off to university of any graduating class I’ve counseled.
These are “good” kids. Instead of teens worrying about their parents catching them smoking pot or swearing, it seems to be parents who are worried about their teens catching them. But good isn’t the same as enthusiastic. Most of the high school students I work with are suffering from stress and anxiety, sometimes missing school for mental health reasons; they just want the world around them and the expectations put on them to slow down, to match their slow-life strategy. And maybe this isn’t such a bad thing; if we’re living to 100, maybe we don’t need to get a job at 15, graduate college at 22, start a family at 25, and be retired by 65.
After the initial scare of the COVID pandemic in March 2020, anxiety actually fell in the early days of summer that year. Everything slowed down; teens weren’t on the performance treadmill, trying to compete in what they perceived to be an increasingly competitive world. For a brief blip, the bar was lower, the pace was slower; they could just be for a minute. My most sincere hope is that we can give teens the gift of a slower pace and in doing so, grant them permission to dream again. Y
Reference: Twenge, Jean M., 1971- author. 2023. Generations: the real differences between Gen Z, Millennials, Gen X, Boomers, and Silents--and what they mean for America’s future / Jean M. Twenge, PhD.
Alex Ellison runs a college and career guidance practice, Throughline Guidance, which serves clients around the globe. She writes and lectures extensively on the subject of careers and college readiness and has been a featured speaker at SXSWedu and TEDx. She is the author of Go Your Own Way: 7 Student-Centered Paths to the Best College Experience and the creator of the Go Your Own Way Student Archetype Quiz used in schools and by individuals to jump-start their college search. Her forthcoming book, Your Hidden Genius: The Science-Backed Strategy to Uncovering and Utilizing Your Innate Talents hits shelves in January 2025.
Homework Help
15 Ways to Support Your Child
By Janeen Lewis
Let’s be honest – sometimes parents dread homework as much as their kids do. But homework connects parents to what their children are learning in school, and research shows that children are more likely to be successful in school when their families support them. By following these tips, even the most homework-challenged parents can help their children have a successful homework year.
If you are unsure
what a reasonable amount of homework is, The National Education Association and The National Parent Teacher Association recommend 10-20 minutes of homework per night in the first grade, and an additional 10 minutes per grade after that.
1. Understand the reason for homework.
Homework reinforces what is being taught in the classroom and teaches students important life skills – responsibility, time management and task completion. Children should be able to complete the work with little help from parents, and they shouldn’t come home with an entirely new concept to learn. Homework should be practice or an extension of what they’ve already learned.
2. Know the teacher’s philosophy.
Teachers have different philosophies about how much homework to assign. Some think piling on a ton of homework helps build character. Others think children have done enough work during the day and don’t assign any. Understand where your child’s teacher falls on the homework spectrum so you are not surprised as the homework does (or doesn’t) come home. If you are unsure what a reasonable amount of homework is, The National Education Association and The National Parent Teacher Association recommend 10-20 minutes of homework per night in the first grade, and an additional 10 minutes per grade after that.
3. Learn what the homework rules are.
At Open House learn the homework policy of the school and your child’s teacher. What are the consequences for lost or forgotten homework? Don’t be quick to bail your child out every time you get a frantic text message about forgotten homework. One of the purposes of homework is to teach responsibility.
4. Get organized.
Your child should have a backpack and homework folder to carry assignments between home and school. Teachers of primary students usually send homework correspondence each night. If your older child’s teacher doesn’t require students to record school work in an assignment book, provide one yourself and teach your child how to fill it out.
5. Schedule a consistent time.
With sports, service projects, religious and community activities, it can be hard to schedule one set time every day to do homework. Aim for as much consistency as possible when scheduling homework around after-school activities.
6. Designate a study space.
Pick a homework space free from distractions. However, consider your child’s personality and ability to focus when selecting a homework station. Some children concentrate best in complete quiet at the kitchen table or a desk. Others study well on their bed with background music. And reading areas can be creative like a reading tent or comfy bean bag. Make study areas free from video games, television and the games of other siblings who finish homework early
7. Create a supply caddy.
Fill a plastic caddy or bin organizer with items your child might need for homework. Some good supplies are pencils, markers, crayons, glue, tape, stapler, three-hole punch, paper clips, notebook paper, small wipe-off board with dry erase markers, art paper, graph paper, calculator, protractor, compass, ruler and a dictionary/thesaurus combo. Also provide a wipe-off calendar for important due dates.
8. Be available, but don’t do the work.
Helping your child with homework is a great way to connect with them, but don’t spoon feed answers. The whole point of homework is for children to practice skills independently.
Continued on page 22 >>>
Make study areas free from video games, television and the games of other siblings who finish homework early.
9. Use a timer if necessary.
Sometimes children like to procrastinate. Some children like the challenge of beating the clock. Either way, a timer keeps a child focused on the finish line.
10. Keep a resource bookshelf.
Can’t remember what a gerund is? Are you a little rusty on what the terms perpendicular and parallel mean? Keep an assortment of reference books or save online references to your Favorites list on your computer. A good math dictionary for parents of elementary students is Math Dictionary: Homework Help for Families by Judith de Klerk. Another great resource is the Everything You Need to Know About Homework Series Set by Anne Zeman and Kate Kelly.
11. Create a phone chain.
How many times has your child left their spelling words at school or forgotten a lesson? Help your child make a list of friends they can call or get to know other parents in your child’s class so you can have a phone chain to get answers about assignments.
12. Model learning as a priority.
Let your child see you reading the newspaper or books. Discuss current events, politics or the new art or history museum you want to visit. Find exciting tidbits in their homework lessons and research them. Show by example that learning is fun.
Be available, but don’t do the work. The whole point of homework is for children to practice skills independently.
13. Encourage
No matter how tired you are, have a positive attitude about the work your child is doing. Encourage their efforts and let them know you are proud of them.
14. Reward
Homework rewards don’t have to be elaborate, although you may want to up the ante for a struggling child or one who is hard to motivate. A reward can be something as simple as a fun activity when they finish. But you can also keep a homework incentive chart and let your child earn a special activity with mom or dad, some extra screen time or a dinner out.
15. Don’t be afraid to speak up.
If you think too much homework is coming home, that your child isn’t familiar with the material or that they are struggling, don’t be too intimidated to schedule a conference with your child’s teacher. Most teachers welcome feedback and want to help your child succeed.
Janeen Lewis is a freelance journalist and teacher with a Master’s Degree in education. Because she loves to see her students get lost in books, reading is her favorite homework to assign.
WEBSITES THAT HELP WITH HOMEWORK
Dictonary.com and Thesaurus.Com: This website is a dual tool to help students define words and find synonyms.
Quizlet.com: Provides study tools like flashcards, games and study sets. Make your own or choose from their library of topics.
Factmonster.com: Find facts on a variety of school subjects and play educational games. Also has a dictionary, encyclopedia, thesaurus, atlas, almanac, and timelines.
Khanacademy.com: Includes online courses, lessons and practice in a variety of subjects for students in kindergarten through high school. Also includes test prep and information about college and careers.
APPS THAT HELP WITH HOMEWORK
Dictionary.com: This app works just like a print dictionary without taking up desk space. myHomework: This student planner syncs across devices and allows students to access classes and assignments and sends due date reminders.
My GradeBook: Students or parents can keep track of grades with this app. StudyBlue: Provides tools including flashcards, notes and study guides. Tinycards: This flashcard app helps with memorization.
Meta Calculator: A graphing, scientific, matrix and statistics calculator app, this will help in those challenging upper level math classes.
Help! Troubleshooting Tips: Support for Common School Work Struggles
What if my child breezes through homework or is under challenged in school?
Talk to your child’s teacher about giving your child more challenging work. If your child still seems to be on Easy Street, you might consider having him or her tested for gifted services. Finally, if the problem persists over time, ask to have your child promoted or see if he or she can take classes in areas of strength in a higher grade.
What if my child is getting too much homework?
Too much homework can be a drain on family time. And if your child is spending hours completing homework every night, they may get burnt out. Talk to other parents in your child’s class to see if they are encountering the same problem. Then approach your child’s teacher diplomatically with the problem. If the problem doesn’t get any better you might consider
discussing it with the administration or the school’s Parent Teacher Association to see if a more reasonable and uniform policy can be decided for the school.
What if my child is taking too long to complete homework?
If you have a good homework routine in place, and your child is working hard but struggling, don’t panic. Sometimes kids take longer to learn some skills than others. But if the problem becomes pervasive, this could be a sign your child needs some extra help. Consider hiring a tutor or see if your school offers homework help at its after-school program. If your child begins to fall behind, testing him or her might be a good course of action to rule out any learning challenges. Remember, keep an upbeat attitude. Don’t lose heart, and chances are your child won’t either. Y
Teach your kids to look for the new kids, not past them.
By Katy M. Clark
Iadjusted my off-the-shoulder sweatshirt covered in splatter paint. Inspired by the movie Flashdance, my sweatshirt did little to distract from the fact that I was a 5’8” tall twelve-yearold standing alone outside a middle school classroom. It was the first day of school and I knew no one. My family had just relocated to the area from several states away.
As I waited for the door to my classroom to open, I saw two girls whispering nearby.
“Smile,” I thought to myself as my lips curled over my teeth, covered in braces. “Make new friends,” I could hear my mother’s voice inside my head coaching me.
They approached, with the kind of con-
The experience of being the new kid has encouraged me to teach my own children to look for the new students in their schools and be kind to them.
fidence reserved for kids who grow up in the same place their whole lives.
“Are you the new teacher?” one of them asked.
“No,” I replied. Then I froze. I knew I was taller than the average twelve-yearold, but had I just been mistaken for an adult? “I’m a new student here,” I told them.
And then they walked away.
Being the new kid is a phenomenon that many children will experience in their lives. School districts and government agencies officially refer to it as student mobility, defined as any time a student changes school for reasons other
than grade promotion. Student mobility can be voluntary, such as changing schools to participate in a magnet program, or involuntary, as was my case, due to a change in my father’s job. But on that uncomfortable first day, I was not thinking about what kind of statistic I was. All I knew was that I was alone, nervous, and scared. The experience of being the new kid has encouraged me to teach my own children to look for the new students in their schools and be kind to them. In a culture that is desperate for kindness, reaching out to the new kids is a tangible way to demonstrate it.
Below are 10 concrete ways I’m teaching my kids to help the new kid in school. May you find these helpful to share with your own kids as the school year begins.
1
Recognize that there will be new kids at school, kids who do not know anyone. Look for them, don’t look past them.
2 Say hi. Ask where the new kid is from. Does she have any pets or siblings?
3
Sit with the new kid at lunch. Oh my word, just sit with him at lunch on the first day.
4 Invite the new kid to hang out after school.
5 Did I mention just talk to the new kid? It’s okay if you’re not best friends. Maybe you won’t have anything in common. But if you never even talk to the new kid, then you won’t find out if you have anything in common or not.
6
Tell the new kid about clubs, sports, or other activities at school. When I was invited to join the basketball team, I gained a whole team of friends.
7 Help the new kid find things like the gym and the cafeteria.
8
Sit with her on the bus or stand with him at the pick-up loop. Even if it’s just for a day or two.
9 Compliment the new kid. Maybe she has a cool backpack. Maybe she’s wearing a shirt with a sports team that is also your favorite sports team. On my painful first day, remember those girls that walked away from me? Later that day one of them told me she liked my watch band. It was a small comment, but it meant so much to me.
10
Be welcoming and inclusive in group work in class. Remember, the new kid knows no one and things may have run differently at his old school.
Parents, teach your kids to look for the new students and take any of these concrete steps to be kind and helpful. As a result, the new kid won’t feel so alone and will be one step closer to finding her way in a new school.
And if you see any new moms or dads standing alone at the pick-up loop after school? Then it’s your turn to say hello. Ask where they are from. If you never even talk to the new parents, then you won’t find out if you have anything in common or not. Y
Katy M. Clark is a writer who embraces her imperfections as a mom on her blog, ExperiencedBadMom.com
How to Motivate Kids for Back to School
How to Motivate Kids for Back to School
TBy Sarah Lyons
By Sarah Lyons
he long summer days of sunshine, pool time, travel, and enjoying a leisurely schedule are coming to a close as a new school year quickly approaches. Some kids enjoy all of the excitement and promise of a new school year but others may find the thought of waking up early, completing nightly homework, and the stress that goes along with maintaining good grades something to dread rather than look forward to. Parents can help get kids excited for the new school year so they don’t lose their motivation before the school year even starts.
SET A GOOD EXAMPLE
For busy parents, it can be easy to get down about the thought of getting up early, packing lunches, helping with homework, shopping for school supplies, and prodding the kids out the door every morning. Our kids feed off of our attitude and if we are dreading the backto-school routine, chances are they will too. On the other hand, if a parent focuses on the positives of a new school year such as having a fresh start with a new teacher, making new
friends, and the fun of being challenged and learning new things, our kids will feed off of this excitement and start to look forward to a new school year also.
USE WHAT THEY LOVE
A great way to motivate a child is to use something they are already looking forward to. If you have a social child, then remind them they will have daily time with friends. If they love sports, remind them they will have the opportunity to participate in P.E. class, play
Work with your child to set goals for success and reward them for meeting their goals.
at recess, or participate in school sports. If they have a favorite subject, focus on the opportunity to learn more throughout the school year. Encourage your child to get involved in clubs and activities that include things that they love and are interested in. For some kids, buying a new backpack and school supplies will be a great motivator for them. Consider what will motivate your child and focus on the positive aspects that are related to school and what your child loves about it.
BE REALISTIC
One way to motivate your kids is to be honest with them about the importance of a good education. School is necessary and important for your child to build their skills in reading, math, science, and understand the world around them. It’s also important to do well in school if they would like to continue on to college. For younger kids, college may seem like the distant future. Parents can explain that they use reading and math skills every day. The teamwork and social skills they learn in school will also help them learn to work with others in sports and play.
CREATE HEALTHY HABITS
Encourage your child to get a good night’s rest, eat a healthy breakfast, and focus on good study habits. An
after school routine to complete homework and chores will help your child adjust to the back-to-school routine. Set aside time for free time as well. Host a playdate, have a movie night, go to the park, and schedule time for fun and relaxation so kids don’t get too bored with their routine.
SHARE YOUR EXPECTATIONS
It’s important to let your child know you have high expectations for the upcoming school year. Work with your child to set goals for success and reward them for meeting their goals. Some kids may need an academic goal, while others need goals such as no tardies for the quarter or turning all assignments in on time. It may help to communicate with your child’s teacher to come up with some beneficial goals for your child. Rewards could include a special outing as a family, going out for ice cream, picking out a special toy, or extra screen time.
As your family kicks off a new school year, try to stay positive and use things that already motivate your child to get them excited about the new school year ahead. Y
Sarah Lyons is a freelance writer and mom of six kids including triplets. She enjoys reading, writing, and spending time outdoors with her family.
When They Don’t Make the Team
By Sarah Lyons
Being part of a team is a great experience for kids and helps them build social skills, make friends, and build confidence. However, when your child tries out for the team and doesn’t make it, this can cause a lot of disappointment and feelings of inadequacy. This not only applies to athletics, but can also include other activities like theater, musical ensembles, dance team, and robotics. The reality is, there are only so many open spaces on a team and some make it and some don’t. How can parents support and encourage their child when they are cut from the team?
ALLOW TIME FOR FEELINGS
It takes a lot of hard work to try out for a team. Perhaps your child had to step out of their comfort zone to give it a try or maybe they were cut from a team they have been part of in the past and are feeling rejected. Your child may have feelings of anger, confusion, sadness, or disappointment. Take time to validate their feelings. “As a junior who played volleyball every year, it was hard for her to be cut from the team.” said Kerri Arnold, mom of three. “I just hugged her and let her be sad. Later, she was able to go to the games and support her friends!” Our first response as parents may be to jump in with a negative comment about the coach or to make excuses. Instead, listen to them vent
and allow them to explain their feelings. Give them a hug and say things like “That must hurt.” or “What can I do to support you?” which will let your child know you are behind them. Your child may not want to talk. If this is the case, give them space and let them know that you are there when they are ready.
GIVE ENCOURAGEMENT
Once your child has had some time to process what happened, sit down and talk to them about it. Let them know that you are proud of them for all their hard work. Talk about what they learned from the experience, if they had fun, and what they could do better next time. This doesn’t mean your child has to give up on a sport or activity they love, it just means they won’t be on this team this year. “I think you can try to frame it as a positive for trying and then evaluating what they could do to make the team next year.” said Kara Thomas. “I find with my teen, he just needs some alone time to process it and doesn’t want me breaking it down with him like I might have done when he was younger. Now, I ask how I can support him and let him lead.” You can encourage them to continue to improve and look for an alternative team in the community. Let your child know that their worth is not based on whether
Let your child know that their worth is not based on whether they make a team or are good at an activity.
they make a team or are good at an activity. Give them reasons they are valued and point out some of their strengths both in the activity and outside of it.
TALK HONESTLY WITH YOUR CHILD
It is a good idea to have an honest conversation with your child about the reality of sports and activities. They are competitive, especially school activities where the population of the school is large but the number of available places on a team is small. Your child doesn’t have to give up because they didn’t make it. Coaches have to consider many factors when choosing players and it may simply be about timing. It may help your child to talk to the coach about their reasons for making the decisions they did. Your child can also ask what they can improve on for next time. Let your child know that many athletes that went on to become professional players didn’t make their high school teams. Similarly, there are famous actors that didn’t make their high school plays and popular authors who had their books rejected dozens of times before getting published. (An internet search can give you lists to show your child.) Rejection is difficult
but it is also a fact of life. While we can’t protect our children from it, we can encourage them to use it as motivation to improve their skills and try again. As you work through your child’s feelings and disappointment, they will realize that time helps them reflect on the situation. Being cut from the team is difficult but it also gives your child a moment to reflect. Is this the sport for them or would they like to try something else? If they do stick with it, why do they think they were cut from the team? What advice does the coach have for next time? Is there another team your child can try out for? How will they work on sharpening their skills for next time? Surely they aren’t the only child who was cut from the team, is it possible to form another team made up of those players? Most importantly, is the sport fun, and if it is, how can they find a way to enjoy it? Encourage your child to take the experience, learn from it, and turn it into something positive. Y
Sarah Lyons is a freelance writer and mom of six kids including triplets. She enjoys reading, writing, and spending time outdoors with her family.
Your child may have feelings of anger, confusion, sadness, or disappointment. Take time to validate their feelings.
DOWNSIZING TIPS: Smart Ways to Sell Your Unwanted Items
How to have fewer items to move and earn money from getting rid of your stuff
By Cheryl Maguire
When Mary Potter Kenyon, 58 at the time, was offered a job an hour away from her home in Manchester, Iowa, she knew it was time to downsize. The position was as a program coordinator at the Shalom Spirituality Center in Dubuque, Iowa in April 2018. Her husband had passed away, only one of her eight kids lived with her and she didn’t relish the idea of commuting two hours a day, so it was time to move. She found a two bed-room house near her new job and listed her four bed-room home for sale. Then she began the process of decluttering.
For the next two months, Potter Kenyon sold her furniture and other items on Facebook Marketplace, held two tag sales, and sold items through consignment shops. By the time she was done not only did she have significantly fewer items to move to her new home, but she also earned over two thousand dollars. After this experience, Potter Kenyon was inspired to write the book, “Called to Be Creative,” since getting rid of her clutter helped her to feel more creative.
So how can you earn money and create room for creativity instead of your clutter? Experts share their tips for selling used items on Facebook Marketplace or Craigslist.
“The fun thing about reselling online is that you never know what people will be interested in. I once sold a mop,” says Alex Davis, co-creator of the lifestyle blog, “Ryan and Alex Duo Life.”
SHOULD YOU USE CRAIGSLIST OR FACEBOOK MARKETPLACE?
Craigslist gained popularity in 2012 when there were over 700 cities listed. Facebook Market place is a newer site that launched in 2016. The pros and cons of each site depending on your personal preferences. On both platforms, it is free to list your items for sale.
Craigslist is anonymous which some people prefer since you don’t have a profile or any identifying information. Whereas Facebook Marketplace is linked to your Facebook profile so you can see the buyer’s profile and friend list. The buyer can also see your profile which might make them feel
“safer” buying from you if they have shared friends or other common interests.
Facebook Market place also offers a rating system so the buyer can see if you are highly rated and might be more likely to trust you whereas Craigslist doesn’t offer this option. You receive messages in Facebook Marketplace from buyers through Facebook messenger. In Craigslist, the messages are sent through an encrypted email or text message so the buyer will not have your real information.
“A big pro with Craigslist is that you can pick your favorite communication method. Craigslist can connect you to potential buyers by text, email, or telephone through their server, keeping your numbers and information anonymous,” says Davis.
The anonymity may be appealing to the seller since the buyer will have less information about them, but scammers can also take advantage of this anonymity by not revealing their identity.
“When you use Marketplace instead of Craigslist you have some visibility into the buyer to make sure the person is not a scammer. When someone reaches out to buy an item on Marketplace, you’ll be able to see their Facebook profile,” says Davis.
PICTURES MATTER
The saying goes, “never judge a book by its cover” but the saying is there because people do judge a book by its cover. Well, the same idea can be applied to the picture you use to sell your item. If it is blurry, has lots of clutter in the background, or is not a good angle then people are going to scroll right past your item and move on to the next one. So taking a good picture is really important since it’s the buyer’s first impression of the item.
WRITE A DETAILED HONEST DESCRIPTION
A lot of the selling process relies on trust so it’s important, to be honest in the description about any known defects or issues with the item you are selling. This will also save your time and the buyer’s time in relation to whether they want to buy the item or not.
The details are also important in the sense that the buyer will know if they like that brand name or how used the item has been. So list everything you can about the item such as the brand, year purchased and size or dimensions. You can look up the item on a store website like Amazon or Target and see what the store lists in the description and then use some of those same descriptors. Keywords are important when the person searches for the item so use words that will show up in a search.
PRICE IT RIGHT
“It all comes down to pricing your items well. Look at what other sellers with similar items and what their list price is or sold for to help you get an idea about how to price it,” says Andrea Woroch, a nationally-recognized family finance expert, writer and on-air contributor.
The price of the item is important. If you price it too high then the buyer will move on to the next item and not consider buying. But if you price it too low you might miss out on money you could earn. So how do you find the right price? You
can search the site you are going to sell on and see what other similar items are priced. Another good rule of thumb is to price the item for half of what you paid for it when it was new.
BE WILLING TO NEGOTIATE
Most people that buy used items are looking for a deal. One way they will feel like they got a deal is if they can pay less than the price that is listed. With that in mind, you may want to list your price a little bit higher than what you want to actually sell it for. If you don’t want to negotiate you can list the item as a firm price.
“Explain in the description if you are firm on price or open to negotiations so you don’t waste your or your buyer’s time,” says Woroch.
ITEMS THAT SELL WELL
Items that sell well can vary in locations but in general smaller furniture in good condition like a bureau or end table sell well. Popular electronics and video games can also sell well along with homeowner tools that everyone needs like a hammer or a wrench.
“Things that may be sold out in stores sell well. During the pandemic, you couldn’t get your hands on any bike or camping stuff. That would’ve been a great time to sell those items since everyone was looking to buy it and would pay more,” says Woroch.
ITEMS THAT ARE HARD TO SELL
Clothing can be tough to sell since the size can vary and often people like to try on clothes before buying.
“Selling clothes often works best in a garage sale. Or, if you want to sell the items online, make it a ‘grab bag’ where someone can pick up a whole bag of size medium clothes or size 6 shoes. They have to take the whole bag but get a big discount,” says Davis.
SAFETY CONCERNS
In general, most people that buy used items are honest and just want to buy the item. But there are some people that can cause problems, are dishonest or are criminals. You can meet the person in a populated place with video cameras such as a store parking lot to avoid having strangers come to your home. If you do have a negative experience, you can report it to the site you sold your item on. And if you experience a criminal interaction then report it to your local police department.
NO SHOWS AND OTHER FRUSTRATIONS
Selling your used items is a great way to earn money and get rid of unwanted items at the same time. But there are frustrations that come along with the process. Sometimes people will not show up for their scheduled time to buy the item. Other people will ask lots of questions, request additional pictures, and then not buy the item. If someone asks you to hold the item you should only do so if they are willing to pay for the item upfront. One way that they can do this is through PayPal or Venmo. You can also offer this as an option and then leave the item in an agreed upon place so that you don’t have to be home or interact with the person to make the sale.
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A lot of the selling process relies on trust so it’s important, to be honest in the description about any known defects or issues with the item you are selling.
“If you can, arrange for contact-less pick up of items. If you have a front porch or backyard, use it and ask for the buyers to put the money under the doormat. Over the years, my husband and I have sold hundreds of items this way. It keeps it simple and we have never had anyone not pay us,” says Davis.
DONATE YOUR ITEMS
So what do you do with items that don’t sell? You could try listing it for “free” on sites like Facebook Marketplace or Craigslist. You would be surprised at what people are willing to take if it is free—everything from a broken grill to a wood pallet. The good thing about giving it away is that the item won’t end up in a landfill and hopefully someone else can use it—as the saying goes, “one man’s trash is another man’s treasure.”
YOU
CAN ALSO LIST YOUR ITEMS FOR FREE ON THESE
SITES:
FREECYCLE.ORG
Freecycle is a nonprofit movement of people. You do not pay a fee to list your items. When you sign up you select your town or one close to you and request to join the group. Town groups are run by volunteer moderators in the hopes of reducing the burden on landfills.
NEXTDOOR
Nextdoor is a privately-held company that is an app created to connect you with your community—neighbors and businesses. It is free to join and post information. You are allowed to offer free items in the Neighbor Services category.
OFFERUP
OfferUp is a privately-held company that is an app created to help users buy and sell items. It is free to use and only charges a fee if you want to promote your items. You can list items for free.
BUYNOTHING
BuyNothing is a worldwide social movement with groups in 44 nations. People join the groups so that they can offer their items for free to other people in the group. Y
Cheryl Maguire holds a Master of Counseling Psychology degree. She is married and is the mother of twins and a daughter. Her writing has been published in The New York Times, National Geographic, Washington Post, Parents Magazine, AARP, Healthline, Your Teen Magazine, and many other publications. She is a professional member of ASJA. You can find her at Twitter @ CherylMaguire05
How To Thrift Shop With Your Teens: 9 Tips To Find Cheap Trendy Clothes
By Katy M. Clark
Inever thought that I would be flipping through a rack of shirts, all size Small, with such fervor. After all, I wear a size Large. Plus, I didn’t need a shirt.
But there I was, at my teenager’s request, hunting for small Lululemon tops in the athletic wear section of my local thrift store. Meanwhile my teenage daughter was a few aisles away in the casual wear section scouring those racks for the trendy athleisure brand.
We were thrifting, aka on a mission for designer duds at discounted prices. And we were not alone. Lots of like-minded people were seeking new-to-them treasures in the thrift store that day. That’s because thrifting is white hot, both as a way to be socially responsible and a way to save money on name brands.
I’m happy to report that my daughter was able to score a few Lululemon pieces--for a fraction of their original price! I give
credit to my daughter for her thrifting success. Not only did she use me to divide and conquer the store, but she employed other strategies that increased her chances of finding amazing pre-owned pieces at fantastic prices. I share her strategies and other helpful tips below. May these empower your teen to be the boss of their next thrifting trip!
1Make a list of all the thrift stores in your area. You’ve probably heard of national ones like the Salvation Army and Goodwill, but notice local ones, too. These are usually run by non-profit groups such as churches or charities. Don’t forget consignment stores either, which offer second-hand pieces in good condition that have been sold back to the store, rather than donated. The national chain Plato’s Closet comes to mind.
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2
Follow the stores on social media. The day my daughter and I were looking for Lululemon was not picked by chance--the store had saved up all its name-brand athletic wear for a special one-day sale. They advertised the event on social media in the weeks leading up to the sale and promised a huge selection. We never would have known about it if my teen hadn’t followed them on social media and noticed their posts.
3
Another perk of following thrift stores on social media is that they post outfits or coordinated looks that may inspire what your teen wants to buy. Our local Plato’s Closet showcases trendy outfits on their Instagram feed. My daughter has hunted specifically for a cute shirt or pair of leggings that was featured online and was ecstatic when she found them in store.
4 Your teen can also find inspiration for thrifted looks by utilizing Pinterest, YouTube or Tik Tok. Have them create vision boards on Pinterest or watch videos of outfits that people put together. Use the looks as guides while your teen shops. That way, your teen will be focused rather than overwhelmed by the selection and won’t be tempted to buy something they may already own.
5
What’s even better than finding something terrific at the thrift store? Getting it for the lowest price, of course! Teens should check if they qualify for additional discounts. Is anyone in your family a member of the military or is your teen shopping with Grandma, a senior citizen? Our local thrift shop offers discounts for students and teachers. These additional discounts can make a thrift store trip even (wait for it) thriftier!
6
Don’t forget that your teen can donate back clothing, shoes, and accessories like purses and scarves that they no longer need, want, or may have outgrown. Not only will your teen’s closet be more organized, but someone will love those pieces again! Or sell the items back--some stores offer consignment so your teen may get a bit of cash or even store credit towards their next haul of pre-loved awesomeness.
7
Visit stores often as what’s in stock changes constantly. Also, check out different sections of the store, just like my daughter and I did when we split up and looked for Lululemon in both the athletic and casual wear sections. The children’s section might work for some teens, too. For instance, a size Large or XL in the children’s section can be the equivalent of a Woman’s Small. Finally, don’t overlook the Men’s section. Men’s clothes can be great for baggy styles or unique pieces that your teen can make their own.
8 Join your teen when they shop or encourage them to go with friends. Adults will be able to remind teens about all the treasures they already own and prevent overindulging. Meanwhile, friends can offer their perspectives on pieces that a parent might pass over. My idea of what’s fashionable is usually a couple steps behind what my teen considers in style. When my daughter goes thrifting with her best friend, she comes home with adorable pieces and outfits that I never imagined would look so good.
9
Finally, take heart if your in-person shopping trip is a bust. There are a plethora of online thrift stores or consignment shops to consider. Take a look at websites like ThredUp, Poshmark, Mercari, and Swap.com. Or go old school and check out eBay. Hunting for trendy items online can be just as satisfying as scoring them in person, but from the comfort of home. Y
Katy M. Clark is a writer and mom of two who embraces her imperfections on her blog Experienced Bad Mom.
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Kennedy Day School at Franciscan Children’s provides fully collaborative special education, therapeutic and health services to students ages three to twenty-two with significant, complex medical, physical and cognitive needs. Our sixty years of experience, proven experience, demonstrated expertise and welcoming, accessible campus mean the student comes first,
