Recognising these patterns is the first step to breaking free. When you feel overwhelmed, pause and name the emotion. Are you frustrated, anxious, or tired? Once you’ve identified it, ask yourself: what do I need right now? Maybe it’s a quiet moment, a snack, or simply permission to feel your feelings without judgment.
Focusing on what you can control—your reactions—you’ll feel more empowered and less overwhelmed. And when others try to pull you into their emotional storms, remember: it’s not your job to steer their ship. Your role is to stay steady at your helm.
You can also reframe your emotions as opportunities. If your patience is tested by long lines or traffic, consider it a chance to practice staying calm. A simple shift in perspective—like saying, “This is improving my resilience”—can help you regain control and keep the situation from spiralling.
The holidays don’t have to be perfect to be meaningful. By embracing the rough roads, breaking free from emotional cycles, and responding with choice, you can create an authentic and fulfilling season. Prioritise your well-being alongside your family’s joy. You deserve to feel as much peace and happiness as you work hard to create for everyone else.
RESPONDING WITH CHOICE The holidays will throw challenges your way: family conflicts, unrealistic expectations, or the inevitable mishaps. However, how you respond to these situations is entirely up to you. When a situation feels out of control, remind yourself that you have choices. Instead of reacting with frustration when the kids spill juice on the freshly cleaned floor, pause, breathe, and respond calmly. Shifting your language can help, too. Instead of saying, “This always happens to me,” try saying, “This is frustrating, but I can handle it.”
Dr Jane Foster is a leading educator, researcher, presenter and author of “It’s In Your Hands; Your Steering Wheel, Your Choice”. Combining her educational skills with neuroscience and positive psychology, Jane equips people with strategies to help build emotional resilience and manage their daily stresses, successfully changing perspectives and creating new neural pathways. For more information, visit website: www.emotionalresiliencetraining.com.au
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