Positive Thinking: How to Get Started By Maggie Allen Positive thinking was not something that ever came naturally to me. Or self-love, for that matter. Growing up, I was frequently plagued with self-doubt and overbearing internal criticism. I sought validation from everyone but myself, and several people were all too happy to reinforce my low opinion of myself. So what turned this around? A number of things, but the first was to identify what kinds of negative thoughts I was having. Having a name for our experiences can be surprisingly powerful, because language is a major agent that affects the way we think. What flavor is your negative thinking? Negative thoughts are like ice cream; they come in several different flavors. Maybe you are a catastrophizer, meaning that anything negative around you can quickly become a world-ending tragedy, in a way that seems deceptively logical. For example, you’re running late to work one morning, and you stressfully conclude that your boss will be angry, you will lose your job, and you might not be able to get another one. How will you pay your bills? Will you have to starve? Or maybe everything has to fall into one of two categories: success or failure. You ate a brownie at breakfast this morning, which obviously means that your diet is shot, and there’s no point in trying to be good for the rest of the day. Maybe you shouldn’t even bother trying to eat healthy at all. Or maybe you feel stressed and tired all the time and take that as a sign that there is no way to move forward. The fact that you feel so overwhelmed means it must be true, and if it is, what can you really do about it? There are many more patterns like these, but they all have at least one thing in common: they are traps designed to paralyze you in self-loathing and pity. They play on your insecurities and fears, about yourself, about life, about the things you can and can’t control. But while they can be debilitating and discouraging, you can jump the hurdle.
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