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PQMONTHLY.COM Vol. 2 No. 7 July/August 2013
LADY BUNNY PLAYS THE PONY
PORTLAND QUEER
MUSIC FESTIVAL
TRANS ACTIVISM
AT MICHFEST
QI FORCE
CONNECTING AT OUR
INTERSECTIONS
2 • July-August 2013
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MUCH ADO ABOUT SOMETHING ELSE Sometimes it takes a shit storm to help us recognize a tempest in a teapot. I am generally wary of writing in the first person in this publication — and particularly on this page — as I would never want our readers to think any one person speaks for PQ Monthly as a whole, but my almost pathological loathing of conflict and complication is being challenged by some rather conflicted and complicated emotions right now, so I felt compelled to get vaguely personal. You see, amid a slowly-unfolding upheaval in my private life, I find that the work squabbles and community dramas that would usually get my heart racing and my hands shaking — and have me reaching for my keyboard to respond — just aren’t registering with the same intensity. I’ve noticed this turning away from the trivial in the community, too — particularly on Facebook in recent days, where in-fighting has taken a backseat (at least temporarily) to introspection and anger as the conclusion of George Zimmerman’s trial spurs intense conversations about race and justice in this country. All of which has me thinking: If tragedy can distract us from the teapot tempests of our day-to-day lives, are petty conflicts in turn serving as a distracPhoto by Julie Cortez, PQ Monthly tion from problems that are less obvious and harder Led by one of the evening’s several speakers, the crowd prays during a rally and march held July 14 in North Portland in response to George Zimmer- to address? man’s acquittal for the killing of Trayvon Martin. Social media allows us to more easily share information and mobilize, but it also empowers us to quickly take sides and egg each other on — to show solidarity when it would be better to employ thoughtfulness and carefully weigh both sides. We often seem more intent on getting people over to our side — and getting in that clever dig — than on actually getting people together. The web has its benefits, but it does not bring out the best in us. It insulates us from the discomfort of the face-to-face confrontation, from a sense of social consequences. What if the time and energy we’re currently using to snark and argue on Facebook were harnessed to make actual change? What would our community and our world look like if we took a little more time to think before we typed or talked — if we asked ourselves, “Am I making myself and my world better? Or am I just making myself feel better in the moment by seeking the fleeting affirmation that ‘likes’ and you-gogirl-style comments provide?” They can be hard to hear over the din of our defense mechanisms and distrustful instincts, but our better angels are ever urging us to let down our guard, to be receptive rather than defensive, to tamp down our assumptions and prejudices, to keep our temper in check, to act rather than merely react, and to set aside our baggage and our grudges — for our own good and for the greater good. -Julie Cortez, Editor-in-Chief
A SMATTERING OF WHAT YOU’LL FIND INSIDE:
ON THE COVER
Portland gay man charged with domestic violence homicide.................... page 6 The CIA reaches out to the LGBTQ community............................................... page 9 QI Force: Connecting at our intersections....................................................... page 9
izzy ventura
Staff Photographer izzy@pqmonthly.com
DOMA’s death gives binational couple a future together.............................. page 10
media
Opinion: We’ve come a long way — or have we?.......................................... page 13
Sammi Rivera
Director of Video Productions
Defining membership and identity within LGBTQ spaces............................... page 14
503.228.3139
The Pride must go on: Your guide to the rest of Pride...................................... page 18
proudqueer.com
Bomb Ass Pussy in their own filthy words.......................................................... page 23 Portland Queer Music Fest will engulf your entire weekend........................... page 26
The National Advertising Representative of PQ Monthly IS Rivendell Media, Inc. Brilliant Media LLC, DBA El Hispanic NEws & PQ Monthly.
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“There’s a whole movement of queer hip-hop and it’s finally our turn to say what we want to say in the way we want to say it,” says Kitty Morena of Bomb Ass Pussy. Read more on page 23. Photo by Eric Sellers, PQ Monthly
A trans activist reflects on performing at MichFest.......................................... page 29 Lady Bunny on Portland and playing the Pony................................................ page 30 Columns: Latebian Life; The Lady Chronicles; Ponderlust; ID Check; Everything is Connected; Whiskey & Sympathy; Cultivating Life; and Eat, Drink, and Be Mary. Plus Astroscopes, Queer Aperture… and more! July-August 2013 • 3
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NEWS BRIEFS
Photos by Julie Cortez, PQ Monthly
(Left photo) Bend will host its first Red Dress Party in September. (Center photo) Christian Baeff (right) is among the recipients of this year’s Portland Latino Gay Pride Mariposa Awards. (Right photo) The U.S. Supreme Court struck down Section 3 of DOMA last month.
Oregon United for Marriage responds to delay with rapid response team By Erin Rook PQ Monthly
Oregon United for Marriage has been forced to delay the launch of a campaign to gather the 116,284 signatures required to put the Freedom to Marry and Religious Protection Initiative in the November 2014 ballot. The launch, which was initially scheduled for July 20, has been postponed by an appeal from opponents of marriage equality. “Every step of the way, our opposition has tossed up obstacles designed to prevent Oregonians from signing our historic petition,” Field Organizer Kim Sogge wrote in a July 15 email to supporters. “They did this again last week, filing yet another meritless court appeal aimed at slowing us down. We’re confident this will be resolved in our favor, and soon.” In response, Oregon United for Marriage has established a Rapid Response Petition Team of volunteers committed to gathering at least 25 signatures within three days of receiving the petitions. “In the few short hours since we’ve been asking people to commit to the Rapid Response Petition Team, the response has been incredible,” OU4M Communications Director Amy Ruiz said June 16. “We have several hundred people already signed up.” The proposed ballot measure would remove from the Oregon’s constitutional ban on same-sex marriage (created by the 2004 passage of Measure 36) and would insert the right of same-sex couples to marry. It would benefit not only gay and lesbian couples, but also heterosexual relationships in which one or both partners are trans. It is the only remaining path to marriage equality in Oregon. To sign up for the Rapid Response Petition Team, visit http://bit.ly/osidfb.
LOCAL Three months after the state failed to renew the Oregon HIV/STD Hotline’s contract with the Oregon State Health Authority, Cascade AIDS Project announced that it will keep the hotline running with new phone hours and an increased presence online. It is the only STD information and referral line serving Oregon and SW Washington. CAP said it is anticipating increased call volume in response to new guidelines that broaden recommendations for testing as well as the greater availability of at-home HIV testing. Lear more at oregonaidshotline.com. pqmonthly.com
Three healthcare providers in Oregon have been recognized as a “Leader in LGBT Healthcare” by the Human Rights Campaign’s 2013 Healthcare Equality Index: Oregon Health and Science University (OHSU), VA Portland Medical Center, and the Multnomah County Health Department (eight sites). No facilities in SW Washington were recognized. The designation means that all of the healthcare centers meet four requirements: their patient nondiscrimination policies include “sexual orientation” and “gender identity,” their employee nondiscrimination policies include “sexual orientation” and “gender identity,” their visitation policy explicitly grants equal access to LGBTQ patients and their visitors, and they offer their staff training in LGBT patient-centered care. Portland Latino Gay Pride will present its annual Mariposa Award to individuals and organizations “making a difference in the community” in a ceremony during VOZ ALTA at Q Center on July 20. The 2013 recipients are: Hillsboro police officer Adele Ríos, Oregon Democratic Party LGBT Caucus Chair Joey Kerns, Chairperson for the SEIU 503 Civil and Human Rights Commission Carmen Morales Mayoral, and CAUSA’s LGBT Alliance Building Coordinator Christian Baeff. PLGP will also award Western Oregon University junior Iván A. López García with a $1,000 scholarship to further his education. Learn more at latinogaypridepdx.com. About 20 men participated in a protest of the Food and Drug Administration’s ban on blood donations from men who have sex with men in North Portland on July 12 as part of a nationwide Gay Blood Drive. Local point person Alina Wright said that all 20 men were deferred indefinitely from donating based on their sexual orientation, including those who provided proof of a recent negative HIV test. Bend is preparing to host its first-ever Red Dress Party Sept. 14 at Liquid Lounge Club. The party, fashioned after red dress-themed events across the nation, will raise funds for the Central Oregon chapter of PFLAG. In keeping with tradition, all attendees are required to wear a red dress. For more information, visit pflagcentralor.4t.com.
NATIONAL In case you’ve been living under a rock: The U.S. Supreme Court ruled in “Windsor v. United States” 5-4 that Sec. 3 of the Defense of Marriage Act is unconstitutional and violates Fifth Amendment rights to equal protection. SCOTUS also ruled that those defending California’s Proposition 8 lacked standing, effectively reverting to the prior court’s decision. The DOMA decision grants the federal benefits of marriage to samesex couples who marry in a state where same-sex marriage is legal. The U.S. House and Senate are currently considering a bill (the Respect for Marriage Act) to fully repeal DOMA. The Prop. 8 decision allows same-sex marriage to resume in Califor-
nia, but impacts no other states. Though supporters of Prop. 8 attempted to block the reinstatement of marriage equality, the California Supreme Court denied their petition. The American public seems to support the court’s rulings on marriage equality, according to a recent Gallup poll. The survey shows that 55 percent of Americans believe same-sex marriages should be recognized as valid by law and equal to heterosexual marriages (with 40 percent opposed). Support for the legal recognition of same-sex marriages has more than doubled since the question was first asked by Gallup in 1996 (when it was only 27 percent). Only 48 percent said they agreed with the Supreme Court’s DOMA decision (43 percent opposed). An equal number (26 percent) felt strongly about their opinion on the ruling. That number may shift over time, since the only major demographics in which a majority opposes marriage equality are Republicans and people 65 and older. Other decisions by the Supreme Court were less in line with public opinion. According to the Gallup poll, Americans tended to disagree with the court’s rulings on civil rights issues. A 53 percent majority said that affirmative action programs are still necessary (37 percent felt otherwise) and 49 percent opposed the gutting of the Voter Rights Act (versus 40 in support). Among African-Americans, more than 60 percent were opposed. The Senate Health, Education, Labor and Pensions committee voted 15-7 on July 10 to approve a fully inclusive version of the Employment Nondiscrimination Act. According to trans activist Meghan Stabler, it is the first Senate markup of the bill since 2002 and the first time a trans-inclusive version has passed committee in either chamber of Congress.
WORLD After 37 years of ex-gay ministry, Exodus International closed its doors on July 1. The organization, which had been a leader in “conversion therapy,” issued an apology that acknowledged that sexual orientation cannot be changed. While the closure is seen by many as the end of an era and cause for celebration, others are skeptical. According to the Christian Broadcasting Network, an Oregon-based organization affiliated with the estranged wife of former ex-gay icon John Paulk — the Restored Hope Network—– hopes to fill the gap created by Exodus’s demise. In Russia, government-sanctioned antagonism toward LGBTQ people is heating up. The anti “gay propaganda” law signed by President Vladimir Putin on June 30 goes so far as to allow gay or pro-gay tourists to be held in prison for 14 days before being kicked out of the country. It’s unclear how this law will impact the upcoming 2014 Winter Olympics. July-August 2013 • 5
NEWS
Portland gay man charged with domestic violence homicide
Photos courtesy of Montrell Cotton
Salathiel Leroy Dale (right) has been charged with murder in connection with the July 4 stabbing of his boyfriend Duane Bailey (left). Dale’s best friend, Montrell Cotton (left in center photo), says Dale (also known by the drag name Latte Minaj) was being physically abused by Bailey. By Erin Rook PQ Monthly
Salathiel Leroy Dale, 26, was arraigned on charges of domestic violence homicide July 8 in connection with the July 4 stabbing death of his boyfriend, 33-year-old Duane Bailey. Police responded to a call about a disturbance in the 400 block of NE Going Street at 9:12 p.m. and found Bailey with stab wounds. He died at the hospital less than an hour later. Dale, also known by the drag name Latte Minaj, was arrested not far from the scene in the 4700 block of NE Martin Luther King Jr. Boulevard at 9:40 p.m. While what exactly happened that night remains unclear, Dale’s friends say physical altercations between the two men were not uncommon. “It went back and forth between two intense personalities,” says a childhood friend of Dale’s who did not wish to be identified. “[Violence] seemed like how they both dealt with conflict.” Montrell Cotton, 25, who has been Dale’s best friend of 12 years and was close with Bailey for two, says the young performer was being physically abused by Bailey and had tried on multiple occasions to leave him. But Bailey had “a way with words” and Dale always went back. The abuse had been going on for nearly as long as the relationship, according to Cotton, who recalls the first time Dale told Bailey he was leaving and wound up with a bloody nose. “I was aware from the very beginning that my best friend was being abused. It started about a year and a half ago,” Cotton says. Early on, Dale tried to defend himself by restraining Bailey and protecting his face, Cotton says, but Duane was “10 times stronger” than Dale (and about six inches taller). Eventually, Dale started threatening to call the police. But rather than report the abuse, Cotton says he only called when Bailey refused to return his car. “He was too ashamed,” Cotton says. “For him to admit about being abused to others would only cause harsh judg6 • July-August 2013
ment due to the fact that people looked up to him as a strong person.” On the day of the stabbing, Cotton had planned to meet up with Dale at CC Slaughters. They texted on and off throughout the day, until about 7:30 p.m., and nothing seemed awry. If Dale and Bailey had been fighting, he says, he would have known. “I was telling him he needed to find his jean jacket cause I had bought one that day and wanted us to wear them,” Cotton says. “We had a thing for trying to match when we go out.” It wasn’t until Cotton returned a missed call from around 8 p.m. — and reached Dale’s mother — that he realized something was very wrong. He immediately left the family gathering he was attending and drove across town to his friend’s house, where he was greeted by a gloomy and confusing scene. “I loved Duane as if he were my real brother. He had his issues but I’ve never been the type to judge,” Cotton says. “I’m struck both ways — the loss of his life and the possibility of never seeing my best friend ever again .” He is still processing what happened. He says he doesn’t know what to think, but he’s emphatically certain of one thing: Dale must have been acting in self-defense. Despite the position he believes Bailey put Dale in, Cotton says he doesn’t blame him. “I want to [blame him],” Cotton says. “I just don’t know how I feel. I’ve prayed a lot about it.” Since Dale’s arrest, Cotton has talked to him daily on the phone or in person and is coordinating support with Dale’s family. Dale’s childhood friend also finds it difficult to believe the stabbing was a premeditated act. Though he admits that Dale had his struggles, he describes him as a “cool, sweet, loyal, [and] loving guy.” “To me it seems like it would have to be a pretty extreme situation,” he says. “I feel in my heart of hearts it was an accident or a moment of intense rage or fear.” But one fellow performer, who also asked not to be identified, describes Dale as an angry man prone to violent outbursts.
“He was a good queen and performer but [a] crazy negative individual,” the performer says. “When we heard of the murder, many of us were not surprised because of his actions we have seen.” Both the friend and the fellow performer had met Bailey on occasion, but neither knew him well and couldn’t speak to the dynamics in their relationship. Regardless of the specific circumstances that led to Bailey’s death, his murder is a reminder that LGBTQ people experience domestic violence, sometimes with fatal consequences. Most sources estimate that 25 to 33 percent of LGBTQ people are survivors. Although Portland-based domestic violence agency Bradley Angle offers culturally-specific services for both LGBTQ and African-American survivors, a lack of awareness about domestic violence in the LGBTQ community and a dearth of relationship role models can make it challenging for people to get support and develop healthy relationship skills. “I feel like domestic violence is like racism or sexism or transphobia within the LGBTQ community. It’s our dirty little secret,” says Cory L. Murphy-Helmkamp, co-chair of the Alliance for Safer Communities. “The people who practice it think because they are queer it shields them from oppressing other people, [but] the fact is we have a lot of domestic abuse.” According to an obituary that ran in the Oregonian, Bailey is survived by his father, Joel Frank Bailey Jr.; two brothers; three sisters; his favorite uncle, Von; and many relatives and friends. Duane was preceded in death by his mother, Dorina. If you are in immediate danger, call 911. If you or someone you know needs domestic violence support services, call Bradley Angle’s 24-hour hotline at 503-281-2442 or visit bradleyangle.com from a safe computer. Bradley Angle also offers LGBTQ-specific healthy relationships courses and workshops for the entire community. PQ will continue to follow this story. Check for updates at pqmonthly.com. pqmonthly.com
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July-August 2013 • 7
NEWS
8 • July-August 2013
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NEWS NEWS
CIA reaches out to LGBTQ community By Nick Mattos PQ Monthly
The Central Intelligence Agency wants queer people to know that they are welcome amongst their ranks. To achieve this goal, the CIA’s Center for Mission Diversity and Inclusion has launched an LGBT Community Outreach program to dispel myths about the agency and encourage queer-identified Photo by Bev Standish, Digital Elf Studios people to consider careers CIA agents Michael Barber and Tracy Ballard tour nationwide encouraging LGBTQ individu- in intelligence. To find out more, PQ sat down with als to consider CIA careers. They came to Portland in June. Michael Barber, CIA community outreach and liaison officer and LGBT program manager, and Tracy Ballard, technical intelligence officer, to discuss the outreach initiative and the roles that LGBT-identified people can play within the CIA. However, PQ also posed a few questions that the outreach project representatives wouldn’t answer. PQ Monthly: How did this outreach project come about? Michael Barber: The office was established about two years ago with the intent not of recruiting in the community, but opening up doors ... to access minority communities that we had previously not engaged with. LGBT was one of those communities; we had never had a recruitment or outreach in that community. PQ: What sort of roles have LGBTQ people played in the different parts of the CIA?
Tracy Ballard: We’ve been in all of them! MB: Domestically, we don’t have intelligence-collections functions; most of our people work out of Washington, D.C., in support of the overseas. We have four directorates: our directorate of intelligence, the analysts who take the raw intelligence that we source from overseas; the National Clandestine Service, who collect the human intelligence overseas; our directorate of science and technology who do the technical collection operations; and a large directorate of support who [oversee accounting, HR, building maintenance, and other forms of support] in a variety of capacities. PQ: What has been the response from the LGBTQ community to this outreach? TB: for the most part, it’s been a very positive response. Our community is pleased that we’re doing this. The LGBT community as a whole typically doesn’t understand that the federal government hires LGBT individuals, so they’re often quite surprised that we’re doing this and that we are quite progressive and forward-leaning in this regard. They often have no idea what we do, and only know what they see on the news; as a result, we’ve taken stories from the past and taken them forward and repeat them to ourselves. Now, they get to hear the real story, that the agency as a whole has been quite progressive since at least the ‘90s. We have a great, diverse cadre and we need to focus on getting the best people in here. PQ: In terms of personnel recruitment, who’s your ideal candidate? MB: I don’t think there is an ideal candidate, but the most important characteristic trait we’re looking for is integrity — personal integrity, a real belief in what our country stands for, and a desire to be part of that mission. It takes all walks of life to serve at the CIA. We have everything from beauticians to carpenters to mathematicians to IT people. It takes all types for us to do what we do in defense of our country. We always list the open jobs on the CIA website — CIA.gov. PQ: Thinking about personal integrity, it’s interesting to think that many gay people have to spend a significant portion of their lives basically living a double life before they come cENTRAL INTELLIGENCE AGENCY page 29
QI Force: Connecting at our intersections By Leela Ginelle PQ Monthly
Intersectionality is a big topic in social justice circles today, and it’s one on the minds of the founders the QI Force, a new Portland advocacy group. QI stands for queer intersections, and the QI Force looks at and hopes to address the ways queer youth and young adults are marginalized across different aspects Giovanni McKenzie of their identities. “Living in Portland, many people find they don’t meet the identity of a white, cis male over the age of 33, and that when they don’t meet that, life is a lot more challenging,” says Giovanni McKenzie, 19, managing director and chief creative officer of the QI Force. The QI Force held its first event, a “QI Night,” at the Sexual and Gender Minority Youth Resource Center (SMYRC) on July 13. The night’s theme was “Race and Sexuality,” and its program featured performances, discussion groups, and speaker Jerome James, a PSU student and former SMYRC participant. McKenzie said James spoke about the concerns many SMYRC youth have regarding finding their place as young adults in Portland’s queer community when they age out of SMYRC at 23. “It’s like the queer community is the Bahamas, and everybody’s living on their own island,” McKenzie says. “Youth ask, ‘Where do people like Jerome, when they turn 23, go? How do they get to be around people who are like-minded?” McKenzie says a major catalyst for QI Force’s formapqmonthly.com
tion was the controversy and anger that arose from The Eagle’s decision to book black-face drag performer Shirley Q. Liquor. (The show was later cancelled.) “That’s how it came up,” he says. “People asked, ‘What can we do?’ The youth realized they didn’t have a voice. [QI Force] is about giving youth a voice — especially ones with marginalized identities.” According to McKenzie, the group will look at several aspects of identity around which queer youth might feel marginalized in their communities, including race, immigrant status, and homelessness. “A lot of older people in the queer community have turned away [from] the issue of homelessness,” he says. “It hasn’t received the support it should. The awareness isn’t there.” The QI Force is developing several projects including support groups and seasonal community forums addressing current queer intersecionality topics. The group works deliberately, however, and McKenzie stresses that those ideas are still “in the oven, being baked.” What sets the QI Force apart from organizations like SMYRC or Outside In’s Queer Zone is that it’s led by youth and young adults; the maximum age for its officers and board members is 29. This feature is crucial to McKenzie, who sees other groups as unwittingly enabling, rather than empowering, youth and young adults. “A lot of times organizations work for youth,” he explains. “They would say, ‘No, we work with youth.’” McKenzie frowns, his voice betraying some annoyance, “No. You work FOR youth.” The old model, as he sees it, involves an adult asking young people what they want to do, and then doing it for them. McKenzie and his colleagues are eager to organize and accomplish their goals for themselves. To this end, they’ve begun approaching organizations such as CAP, PFLAG Black Chapter, Q Center, and SMYRC about forming partnerships.
The QI Force will embrace a mentorship model, McKenzie says, consulting adult experts while developing organizing skills themselves. “We’re focused on giving the organizers we’re working with a voice,” he explains, “and helping them do the work they see is needed in the community.” McKenzie says recruiting organizers into the QI Force fold has not been difficult once they understand the role they’re being given. “The response has been, ‘Oh my god! Wow! Finally! I’m at a place where I’m being pushed … to see what I can do,” he says. While SMYRC boasts of having a youth-led model itself, with young people making programming decisions within a steering committee, McKenzie says youth empowerment there is more an image than a reality, as decision-making still rests with SMYRC, and with Q Center, which oversees it. That said, McKenzie likens the formation of the QI Force to that of SMYRC itself. “SMYRC started with people seeing a need and supporting it,” he says. “A lot of organizers at SMYRC are seeing a need now for a place where young people can be empowered.” The QI Force’s officers have several decisions to make as they move forward regarding what role their partners will play, what the minimum age for involvement will be, and which projects they’ll roll out next. McKenzie finds the process both daunting and invigorating. “It’s difficult,” he says, “because there’s no real model for this. We’re seeing ourselves as the model. This is a place for real youth and young adult empowerment — where we can say, ‘These are the projects we’re working on. This is what we’re trying to make happen.’ Youth are bringing ideas to the table and making them happen.” QI Night is a monthly event at SMYRC. Visit pdxqcenter. org/programs/youth-programs/smyrc/ and check the SMYRC calendar for details. July-August 2013 • 9
NEWS NEWS
DOMA’s death gives binational couple a future together the extras if need be, until Eising picks up an inflatable travel pillow. “I lost it. I started crying. I tried to be strong,” Daniels says. “If you let your guard down, you would wake up every morning with the person you love thinking, “What if I don’t get to do this for months or longer?’” Eising — a citizen of the United Kingdom who grew up in Germany and has lived in the United States since 2005 — was staring down the expiration of a one-year work visa and the possibility of forced separation from Daniels. They never intended to fall in love, but who does? The couple met at a Shondes show at the Doug Fir Lounge. Both knew band members, and Eising had just finished a thesis on photography in the queer community that featured Daniels’ best friend Ally Picard (who was running the photo booth). The two hit it off immediately and made a date that night. Before meeting Daniels, Eising anticipated working for a year after graduating from Reed College, with an “optional pracPhoto by Alison Picard, alisonpicardphotography.com tical training” visa. Beyond that, the future Raina Daniels (left) and her fiancé Perry Eising will be among the first same-sex couples to seek marriage-related was uncertain. Eising had thought about grad school (expensive) or seeking work immigration benefits. sponsorship (rare), and was on some level By Erin Rook getting ready to say goodbye. PQ Monthly “When Raina and I met, before my work visa started, I knew I liked her a lot and hoped it would develop into On a recent trip to IKEA, Raina Daniels, 30, and her something serious,” Eising says. fiancé Perry Eising, 33, wander the aisles like so many “I wasn’t ready to be anyone’s girlfriend,” Daniels adds. other couples, eying deals on practical household items. But as the relationship strengthened over the following It’s April, and the binational same-sex couple knows better months, Eising found renewed motivation to stay in the than to drift too far into domestic day dreams, but it’s a United States. Bringing it up with Daniels was a balancing slippery slope. act. Eising didn’t want to lead her on, or force a serious rela“I wanted to buy myself a big box of candles,” Eising tionship conversation too soon. recalls. “I wonder: am I going to be in the country long “The first couple months were tricky in that way. I didn’t enough to buy the 100 pack of tea lights? Or should I get want to encourage something blindly,” Eising says. “We the 50 pack? It felt really destabilizing in that moment.” needed a couple months where we just got to run around and Daniels pushes through the discomfort, offering to use enjoy each other and fall in love and not stress about this.”
So when September came around, Eising sat Daniels down in the Penninsula Park Rose Garden and broke the news that Eising would have to return to Europe in one year. “I said, ‘Let’s take every day, let it unfold,” Daniels says. When it became clear that the U.S. Supreme Court was going to rule on the constitutionality of the Defense of Marriage Act, the couple realized they might be able to stay together. “It couldn’t have been a better time for DOMA to be repealed. If it had been sooner it could have forced that [marriage] conversation. And it does for some couples,” Daniels says. “We knew that this might not happen and we still went in with our eyes wide open, hoping the system would change at the pace we needed it to, and we were fortunate that it did.” Although the Supreme Court’s ruling in “Windsor v. United States” opens up a path for U.S. citizens seeking to sponsor their same-sex spouse for a green card, it’s all still new, and guidance is limited. Daniels and Eising are rising to the trailblazing challenge — quickly. Because there are a number of processes to set in motion before Eising’s scheduled September departure date, the couple won’t have time to plan their dream wedding. Instead, they will wed elopement-style in a small ceremony in Washington state in the coming weeks. Daniels calls it “little wedding” — “big wedding” will happen when the time is right. But for now, it’s enough to keep Eising by her side. “I need to say out loud to you that I thought I was going to lose you,” Daniels says to Eising over coffee. “We get so much out of having each other in our lives everyday. To have that not be an option….” Eising looks forward to a time when their immigration status doesn’t influence all their decisions. In the meantime, they will be raising the approximately $2,000 in filing fees (add $4,000-$6,000 if they end up needing a lawyer) and sharing their story in an effort to help those who come after them. “We’re kind of the first wave of people that gets to be scared about what that [process is] going to look like,” Eising says. “After DOMA was struck down there were these universal feelings of victory, like everything’s going to be great. But for us, the work has just begun.” Learn more about Raina and Perry’s journey online at pqmonthly.com.
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Embrace the rainbow
We’ve come a long way — or have we?
By Renée LaChance PQ Guest Opinion
“Queer, isn’t it, you can’t work where you want, live where you want or love who you want?” -Portland Town Council tank top from the 1970s
When I co-founded Just Out 30 years ago with Jay Brown, we both had this tank top and thought it was queer we didn’t have basic human rights. We wanted lesbians and gay men to live free of discrimination in their home and at work. We wanted everyone to live free of intrusion by the government in the bedroom. Same-sex marriage wasn’t even on the radar of LGBTQ rights activists back then. (Heck, “LGBTQ” hadn’t even been coined yet.) Today, with 13 states recognizing marriages between same-sex couples, and the U.S. Supreme Court rulings in favor of same-sex marriage rights, queer people might think all the work is done and that a tsunami of acceptance is coming our way. Not to pop your rainbow bubble, but the reality might surprise you. We are not even halfway to where we wanted to be 30 years ago. The Human Rights Campaign has detailed maps showing the states that have protections based on sexual orientation and gender identity (hrc.org/resources/entry/ maps-of-state-laws-policies). Twenty states ban discrimination in employment on the basis of sexual orientation. Translation: in 30 states in the U.S. you can lose your job for being queer. Twenty-one states ban discrimination in housing on the basis of sexual orientation. Meaning a landlord can refuse to rent to you if you are queer in 29 states. In four states it is illegal to have same-sex relations. Don’t get caught having sex with your loved one in Montana, Texas, Kansas, or Oklahoma. (Granted, the U.S. Supreme Court ruled these laws unconstitutional in 2003, but they are still on the books.) The LGBTQ communit y has made advances, but we still don’t have basic human rights in every state, let alone throughout the world. Thankfully, Oregon has come a long way. It is among the states that thoroughly ban discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity. We fought with our lives for those rights. Queer people died fighting against pqmonthly.com
Oregon’s Ballot Measure 9 in 1992. I see two sides to the same-sex marriage issue. On the one side, the national debate has given our communities great visibility that will help us to achieve basic rights to live, work, and love without discrimination in every state. On the other side, the focus on same-sex marriage has distracted time and money from achieving basic human rights first. Our movement’s momentum has been about marriage and not basic rights, which is arguably putting the cart before the horse. Politics follows whatever fight has money in it. Queer politics is no different and the money has been on same-sex marriage. I was in San Francisco for Pride weekend after the landmark decisions on DOMA and Proposition 8 were made. It was joyful to bear witness to same-sex couples getting to legally marry and be recognized by federal and state government. I rode on a cable car in the San Francisco Dyke March and had dozens of couples yell up, “We got married!” The jubilation was contagious and I was so happy for them. Their relationship was recognized and now was as valid as the marriage of the heterosexuals in their lives. Their joy was my joy. It wasn’t until I was out of that rainbow euphoria that I remembered Sir Isaac Newton’s third law of motion — for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. Instead of a tsunami of acceptance, I fear a tsunami of backlash against the queer community. Without laws to protect us in housing, employment, and hate crimes, we can be swept away by the hatred and bigotry of those who mean us harm. What is even more frightening than this probable backlash? The fact that the majority of states that currently do not have protections based on sexual orientation and gender identity are states that were just given carte blanche by the gutting of the Voting Rights Act by the U.S. Supreme Court. The Voting Rights Act required the approval of the U.S. Justice Department before the affected states could make changes to their voting laws. The U.S. Supreme Court just ruled that isn’t necessary any more. Now it is open season on the democratic rights of marginalized communities in predominantly Southern states, which will make it even more difficult to get protection under the law for sexual orientation and gender identity. While queer people are busy celebrating the court’s decision, we must remember that the rainbow we embrace represents the diversity of our ranks. We are not a single-issue community and our fight for social justice and basic human rights for everyone, everywhere, continues. Renée LaChance is the former publisher of the recently-deceased Just Out newsmagazine. She is an entrepreneur with several businesses, including Kitty Moshpit Productions (kittymoshpit.com) which is an event planning company looking to produce its first federally-recognized queer wedding and reception. July-August 2013 • 13
FEATURES
In and out: Defining membership and identity within LGBTQ spaces By Erin Rook and Nick Mattos PQ Monthly
Editor’s note: This is part three of three in a series on maintaining a sense of community. The modern queer community often prides itself on being an inclusive, welcoming space; however, in both historical and contemporary contexts, queer spaces often have clear signifiers of who is welcome as a member and who is not. As issues of diversity and inclusivity become yet more pressing — and as traditional dichotomies between identities give forth to spectrums — the response of a given community to the challenge of including those who may not fit the “standard model and mode” of membership can become divisive. Traditionally segregated spaces such as the Michigan Womyn’s Music Festival and gay men’s bathhouses create their own guidelines for who is “in” and who is “out” when it comes to membership; considering the ways that these guidelines are formed and evolve illuminate key truths about group membership and inclusion, and can serve as models for the formation of truly diverse queer society. Michigan Women’s Music Festival While not an explicitly or exclusively queer space, the Michigan Womyn’s Music Festival has become a pilgrimage site of sorts for lesbian, bisexual, and queer women since its inception in 1976. For the past 17 years, the festival has been plagued by controversy regarding its “womyn-born-womyn” admission policy. Officially, only cisgender women are allowed to attend, though trans women have been and continue to be among the “festies.” This March, trans lesbian activist Red Durkin created a petition calling for performers to boycott the festival until it end its “don’t ask, don’t tell” stance and welcomes all self-identified women. In response, MichFest founder and artistic director Lisa Vogel explained in a statement that while the festival seeks create an inclusive community for “womyn from diverse class and cultural experiences” and values “a willingness to show up and listen; an ethos of love, compassion, and active care for others; an undercurrent of strength and fierce resilPhoto by Sarah Ditson iency; and a commitment to remain teachable,” the festival MichFest attendees who support the inclusion of is intended “for womyn who at birth were deemed female, trans women’s hang a sign from their car door. who were raised as girls, and who identify as womyn.” Christine Masseey, a Portland trans woman who has not attended the festival, acknowledges that cis women and trans women have different life experiences but doesn’t see MichFest actually engaging with those differences. “[The MWMF environment] is a celebration of femininity, which trans women are certainly part of regardless of being treated by society as men for however long in their lives prior,” Massee says. “So in that sense, they should be welcome along with all other women.” Some festival attendees have expressed concern that trans women threaten not only the intention but the safety of the space — an argument many trans activists and allies say stems from an unwillingness to accept trans women as women. In a recent opinion piece for Curve magazine, Victoria A. Brownworth writes: “If I were running MWMF, this is what I would say: No penises. No male privilege. No oppression of women. Just fun, music, dancing, celebration. Solidarity…. But if you can’t set your male privilege aside, as well as your penis, then MWMF is not the place for you, and your presence will harm other women who, like me, have been brutalized by men.” Durkin pushes back against the idea that the presence of trans women compromises the safety of cis women. (Trans women already attend the festival in limited numbers. Read about trans activist Jenn Burleton’s experiences performing at MichFest on page 29). “The reality is that Michigan Womyn’s Music Festival is not safe for any women until it is welcoming for all women,” Durkin writes in the petition. Freddie Perry, a one-time MichFest attendee who found the experience transformational, rejects the WBW policy. Rather than existing to honor a specific experience of womanhood, Perry says, the policy is based on fear and ignorance. “I think the policy is unacceptable. It’s founded in fear of difference and fear of our mainstream culture’s bogus definition of who trans women are,” Perry says. “I find it ironic and disappointing that women in feminist space like Michigan can question capitalist, patriarchal constructs in other fundamental ways but be completely duped by mainstream concepts of gender in regards to trans women.” 14 • July-August 2013
Three-time festie Sarah Ditson, who has advocated for the inclusion of trans women at MichFest but has decided not to attend in the future, says the festival is stuck in the past. “I think the need for a ‘womyn-only’ space is outdated at this point in time, and queer/ gender-variant spaces are much more relevant and necessary now,” she says. “Hopefully, the voices of performers and activists will change Lisa Vogel’s mind and the festival can evolve into a safe space that is more relevant to the times. Sadly, I think the festival will probably close before the policy changes.” While a number of performers have either pulled out of the 2013 festival or vowed not to perform future fests until the WBW policy changes, it is unclear if or when the Michigan Womyn’s Music Festival will join the growing number of women-only spaces that accept and affirm trans women. Bathhouses The bathhouse has historically been a clearly-defined gay male community space — and while it is a closed community with distinctive social signifiers, the space often succeeds in opening itself up to a surprising level of diversity. Since the 1500s, bathhouses have been key centers of gay male social and political life; since the 1950s in particular, many have run programs such as voter registration drives, and others offered special programs on holidays like Christmas and Thanksgiving for men who found themselves alienated from their families. Non-sexual entertainment also blossomed within the bathhouse environment; performers such as George and Ira Gershwin (who themselves owned a bathhouse) and Photo by Humon Photography, courtesy of Hawks PDX later Bette Midler were known to perThe bathhouse serves as an inclusive, unified community with a clear barrier form for the men assembled. One significant way bathhouses are between it and the larger society. able to create a unified community of their membership is through clothing — or, more accurately, the lack thereof. In the 1979 ethnography “Homosexualities,” Kinsey Institute researchers Alan Bell and Martin Weinberg comment on how the sartorial mores of the bathhouse unify its members. “Visiting a downtown gay bath was in many ways like revisiting a high-school gym — everyone wearing the same towel, in the same color, on the same part of the body,” Bell and Weinberg wrote. “There was no status consciousness in the social-stratification sense; the towel or loincloth created a sort of equal-status social group.” This radical dismantling of men’s social veneer — rendering them separate from both their day-to-day clothed personae as well as the larger world of “men without towels” — enabled the bathhouse to be an inclusive, unified community with a clear barrier between it and the larger society. Bathhouses were, and are, a space for gay men; however, many in the community now understand that some gay men may not be assigned male at birth, or even present in a way that reads to others as male, while cisgender men may also present as women. While it is rare for bathhouses to create official policies excluding those who present (or identify) as women — in most jurisdictions, this would constitute illegal discrimination — policing through social exclusion by patrons often enforces that the bathhouses are not places for those who are female presenting or identified. “I do drag, and once I decided to go to a bathhouse with my face on while I was traveling in another city,” said Boaz Turner (not his real name), a Portland-area bathhouse frequenter. “I have never had a chillier reception anywhere than from the men there. The next night, though, I went in wearing my man-drag — and let’s just say I was very popular. It was an eye-opening experience to say the least.” Gay-identified trans men, on the other hand, are welcome within bathhouses. In a recent interview with PQ, Hawks PDX manager Derek Garduno was emphatic that his bathhouse was indeed open to all male-identified people. “Sometimes a guy — any guy — just needs to get away from his job, get away from the world, and have some fun,” he explains. “A guy needs to play. You can do that here.” Turner notes that, in order to be included within the closed community of the bathhouse, men simply need to adhere as best as possible to the community’s standards — and one of the key standards is sexual. “As I see it,” he explains matter-of-factly, “if you’re willing to fuck and be fucked like a man, the bathhouse is open to you.” pqmonthly.com
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DISSOLUTION OF MARRIAGE OR DOMESTIC PARTNERSHIP By Kathryn Martini PQ Monthly
My dissolution of domestic partnership was finalized by the state of Oregon, and I’ve now officially been married and divorced three times. Two of those divorces were in Oregon — one to my former husband and now to my former wife. It seems odd to me to refer to her that way — I still feel very married, but the signed judgment says otherwise, and what that piece of paper states is more tangible than what I may feel in my heart. Throughout the six months between my wife leaving me and our tryst at the courthouse, people constantly asked me, “So were you really married?,” or “How does that work with the court, since you’re gay?,” or “You don’t need to actually get divorced, do you?” Those questions and people’s general mind-set showed me that even though our registered domestic partnership (RDP) was technically treated the same as a marriage under the law, there is still a huge disconnect in social attitudes towards samesex and opposite-sex relationships. Yes. We needed an actual divorce, just like regular people. We divided our property and assets, decided who would stay in the house and who would move out, and sell our home; we went to mediation over spousal support, insurance, and retirement accounts; and a real lawyer had to draw actual paperwork to file in a genuine court to be signed by a legitimate judge—just like “normal” couples! Although I never felt that others saw my same-sex relationship as different when we were together—it was like our RDP wasn’t equal to marriage—and I suppose that’s because it wasn’t. Cher and I registered on Feb. 15, 2008. We drove to Hillsboro, filled out some paperwork, paid a fee, and walked out legally committed to one another under Oregon law. Being a veteran married person, what that actually meant wasn’t lost on me, but in many ways it was on her. Before Oregon’s RDP law, same-sex couples who broke up went their separate ways and found ways to cope with their emotional loss, but legally, unless there were children or they held joint property, had little to no obligation to one another. My wife never seemed to accept some of those legal nuances — especially surrounding items we purchased with “her” money, because under the law, those items and her money were actually our items and our money. It was a bitter pill to swallow when it came down to our break-up. Although I certainly can’t speculate on what she thought would happen when we divorced, I don’t think she imagined the actual price tag of leaving our
relationship, and I’m not speaking of the emotional cost. Oregon is an equitable division of property state and the law treats marriage and RDP’s the same when it comes to making those divisions. Being well-versed with divorces, it was never my intention or desire to have an acrimonious outcome and we agreed to a settlement that we both found fair. Other couples don’t and won’t have it as easy. Our community has been celebrating the recent Supreme Court rulings and the prospect that Oregonians will soon join other states in recognizing all caring and committed couples under one term: marriage. As we march towards full marriage equality, there are considerations that people need to thoughtfully address, mainly an understanding of what those legal and moral obligations are to one another, and whether or not they are willing to enter into that bond. Gaining the ability to marry one’s partner is about much more than having a wedding or being able to say, “We are married.” Marriage should be viewed as a long-term contract that is not entered into lightly, but partners should also understand what they would very well be giving up as well as gaining. Marriage equality also means divorce equality, and as pretty as marriage seems to be, it comes with the equal and opposite possible outcome: divorce. More than half of all first, 65 percent of second, and 75 percent of all third marriages fail; considering the statistics, it’s amazing that we as a society still place consequential importance on the idea — so much so that we are creating laws to expand it as an inclusive institution. Despite the reality that the person or people we fall in love with, build a life with, and have a family with will probably hurt, disappoint, or even devastate us, we still enter marriages willingly, with affection, devotion, and hope for the future. We put our trust, emotional and physical safety, and faith in something that has very little chance of success — all for the sake of love, companionship, and the refuge that marriage offers. I hope that in the future other divorcing same-sex couples don’t have to justify or defend their relationship as equal to opposite-sex couples, in regard to the legal obligations involved. The benefit of the laws that we are working on equating is that same-sex couples are offered the same protections during their marriages and divorces; both are important and necessary. Unfortunately, we can’t have one without the other.
Kathryn Martini is a freelance writer and a MFA candidate in creative nonfiction at Portland State University. She can be reached through kathrynmartini.com. pqmonthly.com
July-August 2013 • 17
FEATURES PRIDE
The Pride must go on By Erin Rook PQ Monthly
They say pride comes before the fall, but in Oregon, LGBTQ Pride celebrations continue through the autumn. In case you needed proof that Pride is year-round, here’s the rundown on Portland Latino Gay Pride, Oregon Leather Pride, Capitol Pride, Eugene/Springfield Pride, and Southern Oregon Pride. Saturday, July 20 Portland Latino Gay Pride 2013 – “¡Viva la Vida!” – kicks off with its VOZ ALTA: Amor! Amor! reception at Q Center. This all-ages event includes music and poetry as well as the annual Mariposa Awards ceremony and the PLGP Scholarship award. Miracle Theatre veterans Nurys Herrera and Sofia MayCuxim will perform with musicians Edgar Baltazar and Joaquín López. The event will also include the personal stories of youth activist Jaime Guzmán from Oregon Dream Activist and single lesbian mother Margarita Rivas. 7pm, Q Center, 4115 N. Mississippi Ave., $10, all ages, latinogaypridepdx.com. Sunday, July 21 The Portland Latino Gay Pride Festival returns to the Jupiter Hotel for its main event, an annual Latin-style Pride celebration including music, dancing, food, drinks, and performances by Bloco Alegria (a Riosyle Samba band), Ballet Folklórico group México en la Piel, Meesha Peru, and Joaquín López and harpist Antonio Centurión playing boleros and rancheras. The party will be emceed by Enrique Andrade and DJ Francisco PDX will lay down the beats. 5pm-9pm, Jupiter Hotel, 800 E. Burnside St., $5 suggested donation, 21+, latinogaypridepdx.com. PLGP wraps with an after party at Embers, featuring Latin tunes from DJ Francisco PDX, go-go boys and girls, and “late night surprises.” 9pm-2am, Embers, 110 NW Broadway, $5, 21+, latinogaypridepdx.com. Aug. 2-Aug. 11 Oregon Leather Pride Week is jampacked with 10 days of kinky goodness. We’ve included some of the highlights. Check out the full schedule at oregonleatherpride.org. Friday, Aug. 2 Queer Leather Sabbath Kick-Off Party and Fisting Workshop for queer-identified folks of all genders. 7-9pm workshop ($10), 9pm-2am party ($15), The Sindicate, 5224 SE Foster Rd., discount for Bad Girls members,18+, oregonleatherpride.org. First Friday Fetish Party: Electrical Play Demo. 8pm-4am, Hawks PDX, 234 SE Grand Ave., $13 lockers plus membership, men only, 18+, oregonleatherpride.org. Leather Scotch and Cigar Social, 18 • July-August 2013
Photos by Melanie Davis, Izzy Ventura, and Julie Cortez, PQ Monthly
Pride celebrations continue past June, including: Portland Latino Gay Pride, Oregon Leather Pride, Capitol Pride, Eugene/Springfield Pride, Oregon Coast Pride, and Southern Oregon Pride. hosted by Blackout Leather Productions. 8:30pm-midnight, Eagle Portland, 835 N. Lombard, free, 21+, oregonleatherpride.org. Saturday, Aug. 3 Portland Leather Alliance presents a vendor fair and tasting, followed by a Leather Pride Party. Fair: 11am-5pm, Refuge PDX, 116 SE Yamhill St., $5, 18+; Party: 8pm-1am, Refuge PDX, 116 SE Yamhill St., $15 PLA members, $20 non-members, 18+, oregonleatherpride.org. Masquerade Ball and Auction, hosted by DJ Kronos Events. 9pm-1am, Local Lounge, 3536 NE MLK Jr. Blvd., $10, 21+, oregonleatherpride.org. Sunday, Aug. 4 Capitol Pride takes over Salem’s Saturday market square for a day filled with performances by singer-songwriters Kate Sullivan (Loose Wimmin, Hot Flashes) and Johanna (formerly of Johanna and the Vixens), hip-hop artist Devitto P., and the Confluence Willamette Valley LGBT Chorus. A number of community organizations and LGBTQ-friendly businesses will be present at booths. 10am-5pm, Saturday Market Square, Summer and Marion Streets NE, Salem, free, all ages, capitolpride.org. Leather Community Memorial Service and Social, officiated by Bill Westervelt and Gyelle Spence and hosted by Darklady Productions, Inc. 11am-1pm, Catalyst, 4810 NE Garfield St., 11am to 1pm, $5 donation and potluck item suggested, 18+, oregonleatherpride.org. Leather Pride Tea for Female Dominants, hosted by the Society for Tea Enjoyment and Entertainment in Portland. 1pm5pm, private home, $15 per server, $20 per Domme, 18+, oregonleatherpride.org. Cinekink,showing“Best of Cinekink/2013” and “Remedy.” 7pm and 9pm, Clinton Street Theatre, 2522 SE Clinton St., $8 for one, $12 for both showings, 18+, oregonleatherpride.org. Monday, Aug. 5 Movie Night with Lady Alycyn, hosted by Blackout Leather Productions. 6pm doors, 7pm movie, Embers, 110 NW Broadway, $5 suggested donation, 21+, oregonleatherpride.org.
Tuesday, Aug. 6 Kinky Women’s Munch, hosted by Bad Girls. 7pm-9pm, Bare Bones Bar, 2900 SE Belmont St., women only, free, 21+, oregonleatherpride.org. Black Light Bowling & Raffle with the Oregon Bears. 7pm-9pm, AMF Pro 300 Lanes, 3031 SE Powell Blvd, 21+, oregonleatherpride.org. Wednesday, Aug. 7 Leather & Lace Show, hosted by Princess 34 Ronda Marie and Prince 38 DaddyDaun of the Imperial Sovereign Rose Court. 6:30pm doors, 7:30pm show, Embers (front bar), 110 NW Broadway, free, 21+, oregonleatherpride.org. Queer Leather Dinner, hosted by Leland Carina. 7pm, Crush Bar, 1412 SE Morrison St., no cover, 21+, oregonleatherpride.org. Thursday, Aug. 8 Leather Family BBQ, hosted by Oregon Leather Pride. 6pm-dusk, Overlook Park, N. Fremont St. and Interstate Ave., free, bring a dish to share, all ages, oregonleatherpride.org. Friday, Aug. 9 Leather Vegas and Contestant Meet & Greet, hosted by Blackout Leather Productions. 6pm-10pm, Embers (back bar), 110 NW Broadway, no cover, scrip available for purchase, 21+, oregonleatherpride.org. Saturday, Aug. 10 Eugene/Springfield Pride brings a diverse group of performers and vendors to Eugene’s Alton Baker Park. Performers include Sean Gaskell, Spin Cycle Squares, Lauren Joiner, Champagne GaGa, the Imperial Sovereign Court of the Emerald Empire, Tylan, and Coyote Grace. Noon-7pm, Alton Baker Park, 100 Day Island Rd., Eugene, $5 suggested donation, all ages, eugenepride.org. Mr. & Ms. OR State Leather/Bootblack Contest, hosted by Blackout Leather Productions. 6pm doors, 7pm contest, Embers, 110 NW Broadway, $10, 21+, oregonleatherpride.org. Tribal! The Victory Party, hosted by Blackout Leather Productions. 9pm-1am,
Local Lounge, 3536 NE MLK Jr. Blvd., free, 21+, oregonleatherpride.org. Sunday, Aug. 11 Leather Pride Victory Brunch and Rose & Thorn Awards, hosted by Blackout Leather Productions. 11:30am brunch, 1pm awards, Charlie’s on Grand in the Courtyard by Marriot, 435 NE Wasco, no cover (order from menu), all ages, oregonleatherpride.org. Friday, Sept. 6 Oregon Coast Pride Festival kicks off with a meet and greet, followed by music from DJs and live bands and a drag show. 6pm-midnight, Chinook Winds Casino, 1777 NW 44th St., Lincoln City, $5 suggested donation, all ages, oregoncoastpride.com. Saturday, Sept. 7 Dykes on Bikes and allies meet up for breakfast before heading out for a Pride Ride. 8am breakfast, 10am ride, BK Mulligan’s 266 SE. Hwy 101, Lincoln City, oregoncoastpride. com. Oregon Coast Pride Festival continues with a biker invasion, emcee Jennifer Lanier (aka Brude TD King), and a host of performers including comedienne Jackie Monahan, drag kings and queens, children’s activities, and more. 10am, Chinook Winds Casino, 1777 NW 44th St., Lincoln City, $5 suggested donation, all ages, oregoncoastpride.com. Inferno brings the heat with a dance party (open to all genders) featuring DJ Wildfire. 8pm-midnight, Chinook Winds Casino (upper convention floor), 1777 NW 44th St., Lincoln City, $15, 21+, oregoncoastpride.com. Sunday, Sept. 8 Cosmic Flamingo Bingo and a bloody mary bar in the morning with music, lights, and prize packages. 10am-2pm, Chinook Winds Casino (upper convention floor), 1777 NW 44th St., Lincoln City, $10 for first bingo package (includes $5 in slot play for adults), $5 for additional, all ages, oregoncoastpride.com. Friday, Oct. 11-Sunday, Oct. 13 Save the date for Southern Oregon Pride. This year’s theme is “Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness.” Details to come; sopride.org. pqmonthly.com
PERS{ECTOVES
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July-August 2013 • 19
NIGHTLIFE
20 • July-August 2013
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GET OUT!
Thursday, July 18 PQ Monthly Press Party: Each Thursday, after we print, we host a little soiree where you can meet the movers and shakers who make your gay newspaper happen — and mix and mingle with other community leaders and avid PQ readers. Relax, introduce yourself to someone new, read a newspaper. We rotate venues every month. This month: Starky’s. 5pm, 2913 SE Stark. Night of Possibilities: Not Enough’s annual queer art social, a time for queers to meet other artists, musicians, performers, writers, filmmakers—you name it—and find their matching partner (or partners) for the Not Enough Queer Arts and Music Festival that goes down in October. Note: Organizers encourage new projects. Free, all ages, plus Project Speed Dating Bonus. 6pm, Radio Room, 1101 NE Alberta. Free. Laid Out is tonight! It moved to third Thursday this month only. Check out Dance it Out.
CALENDAR PRIDE Want more? We’ll give you everything. Head over to pqmonthly.com and check out our online calendar of events, submit your own events, and peruse photos from your reporters-about-town. Also, remember to carefully examine our weekly weekend forecast — with the latest and greatest events — each Wednesday (sometimes Thursday), online only.
Estate Gardens at Lewis and Clark College, 0615 SW Palatine Hill Road. For tickets: hrcportlandgala.org AIDS Walk Bar Crawl: This one’s a theme, kids. Don your favorite uniform, any style, for the crawl to end all pub crawls. After starting at 6pm sharp at Hobo’s, you move as an entourage to each of the participating bars. Prizes, raffles, signature cocktails, and tons of incriminating photos after. Hobo’s, CC’s, Scandals, Boxxes, and Silverado are on the agenda. 6pm, Hobo’s, 120 NW Third.
PQ PICKS
Sunday, July 28 Market Q’s Art Rummage Sale. Artisan and rummage booths. All proceeds benefit Market Q’s community store and work training program. Come early! Get the good stuff. 10am until 5pm, Q Center, 4115 N. Mississippi. Testify, a Drag Storytelling Revival: The family that preys together, stays together. Church is coming again, children of Portland. Join your friends and gay-bors for an interactive theater experiment in community playfulness. FeaturSunday, July 21 Portland Latino Gay Pride Festival: In its eighth incar- ing songs of werkship and loads of inspirational testimonies nation, PLGP moves back to its old digs at the Jupiter Hotel. by Chanticleer Tru, Margarine Powers, April Brown, Donal In addition to the most delicious food in all the land, enter- Mosher, and more. Hosted by William Frederick Steuernatainers include Bloco Alegria, Ballet Folklórico México en la gel V. 7pm, Floyd’s, 118 NW Couch. $5. Piel, Meesha Peru, and Joaquín López and harpist Antonio Centurión. Community exhibits, sponsor booths, and spe- Friday, August 2 through Sunday, August 4 cialty cocktails and Latin cuisine. This festival is always an Portland Queer Music Festival. (See our story on page absolute delight. 5pm, Jupiter Hotel, 800 E Burnside. $5 26.) This year’s festival, one of the largest queer and ally festivals in the country, expands from one day to three. Crush suggested donation. hosts. facebook.com/pdxmusicfestival Monday, July 22 Pablito’s Big Bearded Art Show: Our favorite cover Friday, August 2 artist’s art is currently displayed at Tonic Lounge — and Chicken Strip: The third round of Chicken Strip is upon you. in the tradition of their weekly “Beard Party,” Pablito has The bimonthly dose of dance floor ranch and drag for childecided to hold a “Big Bearded Art Reception.” He’s call- dren of the night. Hosted by Melody Awesomazing, this ediing all proud owners of the face sweater to come to his tion features Kitty Morena, Lee Lee, PiWacket Extraordinaire, art show on this particular Monday. You’re encouraged and many more. Deejays Chelsea Starr and Beyondadoubt to customize, color, and bedazzle your whiskers, or get make the musics. 10pm, Funhouse Lounge, 2432 SE 11. $5. crafty if you can’t grow one. (All are welcome.) 7pm, Tonic Friday, August 9 Lounge, 3100 NE Sandy. Free. Beers, Steers, and Queers. How about this? A little disco on the range, a party on a farm that benefits Pride NW. From Wednesday, July 24 Queer Leather Dinner: An event for queer people to wear the hostess, Belinda Carroll: “First, we’ll seduce you with meats their leather and gear proudly and where the Leather com- and other foodstuffs, then we’ll fill your soul with spirits. Then munity can have community-oriented conversations. The we’ll make you let go of your stress and laugh away your cares suggested topic this month: clubs. Representatives from the with a stand-up comedy show.” Look up the event on FacePDX Bootblacks, the BILS, Blackout Leather Productions, book. $10 advance, $15 at the door. Ride shares available. Bad Girls, and others will be on hand. The event is intended 8pm, 24655 NW Groveland Dr. Hillsboro. for everyone who self-identifies as Leather and any shade of queer, or is interested and wishes to learn more. 7pm, Saturday, August 10 Bill Dickey’s Pool Party. The annual poolside gala benefits Crush, 1412 SE Morrison. Equity Foundation. It’s an afternoon of fun and fashion complete with models in underwear, swimwear, and resort wear Saturday, July 27 HRC Portland Gala Dinner: A stellar evening celebrat- — there’s even a poolside fashion show. Complete with great ing local and national heroes from the LGBTQ community. food and a hosted bar. Proceeds go to Equity, which works to Join HRC for a Portland-style gala event serving farm-fresh eradicate prejudice against sexual, gender minority, and other gourmet food and delicious Oregon wines and micro-distill- diverse communities around Oregon and SW Washington. ery products. Celebrity guests help commemorate the eve- (This is another one you should look up on Facebook.) Get ning. (Hint: Dustin Lance Black and Dana Goldberg.) 5pm, tickets here: equitypoolparty.eventbrite.com
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Saturday, July 20 Portland’s Fifth Annual 3x3 Basketball Tournament: This ladies tournament benefits HRC and Oregon United for Marriage. Last year, 32 teams registered to play and this year sees no signs of slowing. Nike, the generous presenting sponsor, has helped open up a fourth bracket. All skill levels and ages can compete. The sweetest woman in the in the entire city, Shaley Howard, helms the event, which also doubles as a daytime sunshine social. To register: hrc.org/pdxbasketball. 8:30am, Irving Park, NE Fremont and NE 7.
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DANCE IT OUT (CHEERFULLY PAY YOUR COVERS; DEEJAYS GOTTA EAT, TOO.)
This next month, specifically, you’ll want to keep tabs on our blog; with the changes at both The Eagle and Crush, many monthly parties are moving or have moved, and some are still being planned as we go to press. First Sundays Bridge Club. A slew of stellar deejays play music on one of the city’s most treasured patios. Old Boys Club regularly welcomes special guests. Brunch, mingle, get down. 3pm, Produce Row Café, 204 SE Oak. Free. Every Sunday. Superstar Divas. Bolivia Carmichaels, Honey Bea Hart, Ginger Lee, and guest stars perform your favorite pop, Broadway, and country hits. Dance floor opens after the show. 8pm, CC Slaughters, 219 NW Davis. Free! First Thursdays Dirt Bag. Keyword: Bruce LaBruiser. She’ll make all your musical dreams come true. Indie, pop, electro, all of it. Dance to the gayest jams. 10pm, The Know, 2026 NE Alberta. Free. Hip Hop Heaven. Bolivia Carmichaels hosts this hiphop-heavy soiree night every Thursday night at CCs. Midnight guest performers. 9pm, CC Slaughters, 219 NW Davis. Free. First Saturdays Sugar Town. DJ Action Slacks. Keywords: Soul, polyester. 9pm, The Spare Room, 4830 NE 42. $5. Maricón! Deejays Moisti and Ill Camino, respectively, take their much-beloved, sweaty dance-fest and move it to a more universally-accessible location.. For homos and their homeys. 10pm, Crush (new location), 1400 SE Morrison. $3. Second Thursdays I’ve Got a Hole in My Soul. Three keywords, the most important being: DJ Beyondadoubt. Others: soul, shimmy. 9pm, Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison. $5. Second Fridays BMP/GRND. Portland’s only queer dance night devoted entirely to that tragic(ally wonderful) decade. DJs Kasio Smashio and Rhienna. Wear 90s gear, get in on the cheap. 9pm, The Foggy Notion, 3416 N. Lombard. Free before 10pm, $5 after, $3 w/ themed attire. Second Saturdays Mrs.: The queen of theme. And dynamic DJ duo: Beyondadoubt and Ill Camino. Costumes, photo booths, all the hits. 10pm, Mississippi Studios, 3939 N. Mississippi. $5. Third Thursdays Polari. Troll in for buvare. Back-in-the-day language,
Saturday, July 27 Blow Pony vs. the most legendary legend of them all, Lady Bunny. Yes, Lady Bunny! The founder of Wigstock descends upon our fair city — and the Pony’s packed, sweaty dance floors — to bestow upon us her new single. Also performing live: Purple Crush from L.A. All of your favorite Blow Pony deejays will be filling up both floors with all the music. Show up in drag and challenge the Bunny. Show her you’re a size queen, and challenge her for wig supremacy. Can you do it? 9pm, Rotture, 315 SE Third. $5.
music, and elegance. An ease-you-into-the-weekend mixer. Bridge Club boys make the music. Bridge and tunnel patrons have no idea what to do with us when we pour in. 10pm, Vault, 226 NW 12. Free. (July only, Polari moved to second Thursday.) Third Fridays Ruthless! Eastside deluxe. DJs Ill Camino, Rhienna. Come welcome new resident deejay Rhienna and listen to the fiercest jams all night long. Keyword: cha cha heels. 10pm, Local Lounge, 3536 NE MLK. $3. Third Saturdays Gaycation all you ever wanted. DJs Charming and Snow Tiger. Be early so you can actually get a drink. Sweaty deliciousness, hottest babes. THE party. 9pm, Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison. $3. Fourth Thursdays Cockabilly. Rock and roll disco with homosexual tendencies. The night’s charismatic hostess, Chanticleer, proves Thursdays are back. 9pm, White Owl Social Club, 1305 SE Eighth. $5. Fourth Sundays Gender Abundant Square Dance. All-ages goodness. No experience necessary! 7pm, The Village Ballroom, 700 NE Dekum. All ages! $7. Fourth Fridays Twerk. DJs Slutshine and II Trill. Keywords: old school. Established fun, all night long. So much dancing. 9pm, Local Lounge, 3536 NE MLK. Free! Fourth Saturdays Inferno! DJs Wildfire and D-Zel. Ladies, ladies, ladies. Rotating venue — check online for the latest! Blow Pony. Two giant floors. Wide variety of music, plenty of room for dancing. Rowdy, crowdy, sweaty betty. 9pm, Rotture/Branx, 315 SE 3. $5. Filth: (Formerly Hey Queen!) For the party girls. The more intimate, shoulder-to-shoulder Saturday night choice. Bruce LaBruiser and special guests. 9pm, Beulahland, 118 NE 28. Free. Last Thursdays Laid Out, Bridgetown’s newest gay dance party. Seriously, the posters read: “gay dance party.” Deejays Gossip Cat and Pocket Rock-It, with photos by Eric Sellers. 9pm, Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison. $3 after 10pm. (July only, Laid Out moves to third Thursday.) Last Fridays Temple! A West Side Social. Keeping the west side afloat. Downtown dancing goodness at everyone’s favorite dive bar. Resident Kasio Smashio, plus guest. 10pm, The Matador, 1967 W Burnside. Free is a very good price. Sunday, August 4 Bat N’ Rouge: Get ready for the most ridiculous day in the park, ever. A silly, humorously competitive ( it gets oddly competitive) softball tournament raising funds for Cascade AIDS Project’s Camp KC and the Audria M. Edwards Scholarship Fund. Gym bunnies, drag queens, lesbians in leather — seeing the teams in their garb is worth the price of admission. The “competition” comes complete with concessions, an adult beverage garden, and eccentric cheerleaders. I went last year; it’s wildly amusing. 11am, Lillis Albina City Park, N Flint and N Russell. $5.
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July-August 2013 • 21
WEDDINGS NIGHTLIFE
22 • July-August 2013
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Bomb Ass Pussy IN their own filthy words ARTS & CULTURE MUSIC
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thly
Mon
, PQ
Sell ers
Kitty Morena sits in a leather swivel chair, her legs crossed demurely at the knee, smiling brightly with her hair pulled back in a neat ponytail. Bomb Ass Pussy is in Jeau Breedlove’s Buckman apartment, surrounded by objects of stylish irony — paintings of modern pop divas hang on the walls beside velvet paintings of panthers, bright yellow shelves hold Virgin Mary statues and hand-sewn stuffed monsters beside Barbie dolls, and “Simpsons” DVDs and “Goosebumps” books sit in the corner. Standing beside Morena, a mannequin’s legs covered in blood hold a paper mask of RuPaul, the cut-out eyes staring the room’s occupants. It all makes perfect sense — for a band that compares themselves to mashup master Girl Talk and name-drops folks like Mykki Blanco, Mariah Carey, and Nine Inch Nails as influences, some ‘90s nostalgia is requisite. Christopher Sein and Breedlove sit on a low orange couch, glasses of wine and medical marijuana containers casting long shadows on the coffee table in the summer sunset light. “We never let a song end,” says Breedlove, his eyes wide with the same sort of intensity he shows in Bomb Ass Pussy’s thrilling, energetic performances. “Whenever we do a set, if we have 26 minutes, you have one 26-minute track. We are on-on-on!” he explains, snapping for emphasis. “We use every single moment we have on stage. You can talk to us after; we’re more than down.” “The wonderful thing is that we make new mixes for each event we do,” Morena explains. “Every time you see us, it’ll be a totally new sound, a totally new structure.… Our sound that we’re really crushing on is something very hardcore, very electronic-based.” “We have a mixtape coming out before August called ‘Unleashed,’” Sein interjects, his eyes hidden behind red-framed Ray-Bans. “It’s all electronic-based, very ‘now.’ The record we’re working on is going to be kind of like it, but a little more… well…” “A new sound!” Breedlove chimes in, raising his pinky off his wine glass. “Kind of poppy electric grime, with less emphasis on the pop. It’s just the way we write — we’ll write a verse over Britney Spears, then spit that same verse without a flaw over ‘Soldier’ by Beyonce, then to some ‘80s song. Give us a fucking Reba McIntyre joint and we’ll whoa right now.” “Each of us really interprets things differently,” Morena says. “I like nostalgic sounds, and a lot of phrases. Like, one of our distinctive phrases right now is ‘Hey, we want some puss-say!’” “It’s all about the pussy,” says Sein. “It’s always about the pussy,” Breedlove agrees. His phone rings; a photo of local performer Asia Ho Jackson appears on the screen. “Girl, we busy!” he snaps at the screen. At the same time, the door opens — Brendan Kelly Scott of Magic Mouth saunters in. “There’s a constant evolution for us and for this scene.” Morena notes, nodding at Scott as he passes through the room. “When Chris and I first moved to Portland and were doing ChiChi and Chonga [Sein and Morena’s previous comedy performance project] there was a whole underground alternative-drag performance art movement going on. It just keeps evolving — Carla Rossi right now is just running the game.” “… And now there are bands like Magic Mouth, Sistafist, Damon Boucher — we each have a guest track on Damon’s last album,” Breedlove notes. Sistafist’s probably going to be on our record.” The brim of Sein’s straw hat casts a shadow over his face. “Kitty and I grew up in Southern California, and we were around hip hop all our lives. I grew up listening to Lil’ Kim,
Trina — getting to grow up seeing strong women owning their sexuality was something that gay men could really identify with.” “Left Eye changed my life!” exclaims Breedlove. “As a little sixth grader, not even knowing what was going on, I saw something in that, and it built for a decade and a half.” “Hip hop has always been some sort of storytelling,” says Morena, “and it comes from a place of having something to say. Not to be preachy, but it comes from a place of oppression. As a queer hip-hop artist, I don’t have the same thing to say as a lot of people… but we have our own story. There’s a whole movement of queer hip-hop and it’s finally our turn to say what we want to say in the way we want to say it.” “As a transperson,” Morena continues, “I have something even more unique to share. So, in our collaboration, Bomb Ass Pussy has a lot to say, and we’re starting to get an audience for that — but we want it to be enjoyable, not preachy. We want people to reflect to it and get hyphy to it. You can sing a song about something really important and still twerk to it.” “And being queer people of color — is that the term? That’s so PC!” Breedlove quips. “Being brownfags!” Sein says, taking off his glasses. “Brownfags!” Breedlove laughs. “A lot of our themes ... are specific to being Hispanic, and we rhyme in Spanish sometimes.” “People do view us a bit differently,” Morena says thoughtfully. “They maybe give us a little more credit in Portland, because there’s certain more novelty to it for a lot of the white people here.” “Growing up in Southern California, we don’t deal with race half as much as we do there, because there are just so many more cultures represented,” Sein notes as he smooths his Guns & Roses t-shirt. “You’re surrounded by so many different ethnic groups that our ethnicity would be less of an issue than it is here. People here talk so much more about race, and there’s so much more racial anxiety.” “We’re in a place where there aren’t many few queer hip-hop performers, let alone brown queer hip-hop performers,” Morena notes. “But we’re doing good with it,” Breedlove says. “We’ve broken Portland, we’re halfway broken Seattle — we just played there at Pride, right under the Space Needle….” “And we got booked to play a lesbian wedding in Olympia!” Sein exclaims. “The lesbians love Kitty. We have a sort of boy-band appeal — everyone could love one of us.” “Especially with the dancers,” Breedlove says. “In our live shows we also have two dancers from the Paint dance company — Nicholas Petrich and Daniel Giron. We feel it’s a good look for us, with the four guys and a girl onstage.…” Morena smirks sweetly — “It’s like a gang bang for me! There’s just so much going on in our shows, so much energy going on, that it’s like a circus up there.” Breedlove crosses his legs. “A fucking circus.” “Let me put it this way,” Breedlove says, setting his wine glass on the table. “If we were single, which none of us are, we’d be getting laid all the time at shows. We get hollered at all the time! Someone likes her, someone likes me, someone likes him — we look really different.” “We get all the pussy,” Sein deadpans. “Whatever your definition of ‘pussy’ is, we get all of it,” Morena laughs, sipping her wine demurely as the sun slowly dips below the horizon, filling the room with sunset. “Gay or straight — especially straight married men,” she looks at her bandmates as she bares her teeth in a bright smile, “they just love tits on their back and a dick up their ass.” Eric
PQ Monthly
Pho tos by
By Nick Mattos
Bomb Ass Pussy plays Pony in Seattle on Aug. 30. Their mixtape “Unleashed” will be released via their website before August; a Portland release show at Crush will be held, date TBA. For more information, check out BombAssPussyMusic.com or follow them on Twitter at @WeBombAssPussy. July-August 2013 • 23
ARTS & CULTURE FEATURES
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There’s a woman who’s been coming into my café for as long as I can remember. She has long blonde hair highlighted by bits of gray and is typically donned in sporty Nike attire befitting a Salmon Creek gal on the go — with fundraisers to plan and pets to groom; she’s also a closet chain smoker and drinks about six mochas ever y day. She’s ver y thin — because she has food allergies, she refuses to eat anything she hasn’t prepared at home (save for her delicious espresso beverages, which she watches us make with eagle eyes). If she’s going out to dinner, she stops by to get a drink first, so she “has something to eat.” I mock her coffee addiction; she counters, “Tell me more about vodka, Daniel.” Touché, salesman. We’ll call her Janet. It’s not her real name, but I’ve always thought she looks like a Janet. It’s not often I make real, meaningful connections with patrons at my workplace. We see hundreds of people a day, and it’s typically all simple pleasantries, dashes of sass, and we send them on their way with their thousand-calorie milkshakes. Janet has defied expectations, and I’ve shared as much — and maybe more — about my life with her than I do my closest friends. Breakups, fights, family — you name it, I spill it. After my bigger than life live-in break up, the one that still casts a shadow on all my romantic endeavors, she served as my sounding board. We went to see “Eat, Pray, Love” together. And, regardless of what’s going on, she’s all encouragement and affirmations. I’m constantly in awe of her ability to see in me what I don’t always see in myself. Despite her Clark County, suburban realness, this woman is wise like Buddha. The morning of the great Supreme Court DOMA/Prop 8 smack down, Janet was the first person to text me, the same way she texted me the night my home state of Washington passed marriage equality legislation. Like lots of people, I barely slept the night prior — I napped in restless fits — and I was up at dawn — no easy feat — to watch the rulings roll in. (While there is clearly plenty more work to do, I think it’s pretty clear we’ll look back at June 26 as a rather definitive day in our big gay march.) I didn’t hea r f rom my fa mi ly t hat morning — or that day, or the next. While I’m obviously out and up front about my big gay agenda, we still sometimes dance around specifics. After decades of funda-
mentalism, it’s a slow, deliberate waltz more t ha n a ta ngo. But having someone my mot her ’s a ge living in my mother’s city celebrating the gay is almost an adequate substitute. I also received messages of congratulations from the Canadian (“Hope Rides a Platinum Palomino,” November 2012), who surprised me with a visit to Portland a few weeks ago. (We’d pretty much fallen out of touch.) He and his father have decided on an annual trip to Portland each June. Imagine my surprise and delight when, one particularly lazy Friday evening, still reeling from Pride, the Canadian shows up on my Grindr machine and starts messaging me. (Did someone steal his picture? This can’t be real. You’re staying at The Benson? I’m picking you up immediately.) That weekend we gave new meaning to “Reunited” by Peaches and Herb. It was all very surreal and welcome and I feel like I rode a time machine to late 2012 bliss. I apologized to friends for dropping off the face of the earth for 48 hours, but, let’s face it: they’d all do the same thing. Of course I talk to Janet about my would-be lover up north, and I lament the impossibilities of our geography. I tell her how I’m actively trying to temper any residual excitement springing up because there’s simply no way any of this will ever work out in the long run. “Who knows where you’ll be in a year or two,” she says. “No need to close a door simply because you want everything the way you want it right this second.” Patience is a virtue, as they say, but it’s not something I have in spades. Something a friend wrote the day of the DOMA ruling stuck with me. To summarize, he said, “Today’s worth celebrating. Recognize that politics is a pathetic arena sport where people wait for 51 percent of people to ‘evolve’ on an issue. Celebrate your gains, and continue to stand up for those who are less able to.” Worth remembering and holding close to our hearts, I’d argue, as our own marriage campaign heats up in Oregon. I think about Janet, how she’s said our friendship has changed the hearts and minds of her husband and sons. A few years ago, they weren’t in the 51 percent. Now they are. And no, of course I don’t need their approval to validate my life or happiness, but I’ll sure relish their vote. And perhaps, one day, my family’s, too.
Consider a monthly pledge to BRO to make marriage happen here. If I can give up one vodka soda a week, so can you. It all adds up — basicrights.org. Email: Daniel@PQMonthly.com. pqmonthly.com
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July-August 2013 • 25
MUSIC
Clear your calendar
PERSSPECTIVES
Portland Queer Music Fest will engulf your entire weekend
JOEL HAMLEY Principal Broker, ABR, SRES
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Direct: 971.506.9499 Office: 503.238.1700, ext. 630 2013 DIAMOND-PLATINUM MEMBER, THE MASTERS CIRCLE Top 5% of all Portland Metro Realtors
Ab Soto, who hails from California, is a gender-bending genius who rarely shies away from a good bass line and hook. He’s among the many performers who litter the sonic-soaked weekend. By Daniel Borgen
LICENSED IN OREGON
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You could call it the little festival that could, or some variation of that, but by all accounts now, the Portland Queer Music Festival is anything but little or sleepy. Its queer-only showcase, in its third incarnation, evolves a little more year after year; it started at the now-defunct Red Cap (sharing a space with Boxxes), and moved to Someday and Backspace last year, spreading across two big spaces. The double-venue felt like something out of a bustling metropolis — shows were perfectly timed, and festival-goers would meander back and forth between venues, soaking in sights and, most importantly, sounds. One band would complement another and your ears were nothing but beautiful sonic overload. This year, the festival moves to Crush, expands to three days (Aug. 2-4), and boasts as many artists as ever. We chatted with the event’s founder and principal organizer, Samuel Thomas, about what he has up his very tattooed sleeves this time around. On the move to Crush and the switch from one day to three: “It’s simple, really — we expanded the days because we needed more room. The first two years were only one day but included two venues, and this year we decided more people could see all the performers if we split them up over the weekend instead of into different venues. Crush was an obvious choice because they are one of the few LGBTQ-owned bars left with a stage; plus they invest so much in the community, we thought moving the festival there would shine a spotlight on their great space.” On choosing AB Soto and SistaFist as the primary headliners: “The festival was started to showcase up and coming performers, and no one is more up and coming than AB Soto; he’s blowing up both LA and NYC and I’ve been dying to bring him to Portland. As for SistaFist — they’re Portland’s golden children. They performed the very first festival and brought the house down, so it was a blessing to have them agree to come back. Both acts have elements of hip-hop, electro, and pop — they both create something spectacular and originally-styled. I think Portland is going to love that showcase.” On Night Cadet and their most recent show in Bridge-
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town: “It’s rare to find LGBTQ musicians that perform pop music on such an ethereal and professional scale, and Night Cadet does it. I first caught them at Mo-Wave — that’s Seattle’s LGBTQ Music Festival — and was blown away, literally. I’ve been friends with Garrett Vance for years — his band, Secret Shoppers, performed at the festival the last two years — so when they asked about booking a show in July and then playing the festival I clearly had to say yes. Their show earlier this month had the entire audience struck silent by the music, and I think they’re going to be a very special highlight this year.” On what the application process looks like: “This year we exceeded expectations with over 70 applicants, some from as far away as Europe. It’s a simple process — it’s done online and then me and a couple of others sit down and go to all of the sites, check out the music, and see who’d be a good fit. If I had my way, and a limitless budget, I’d have them all play one huge festival, but time and money constraints means narrowing it down to the very best of the bunch, which is 23 acts this year.” On looking back: “I just love the community response to having this festival each year. It keeps getting bigger and people are more excited and really supportive of LGBTQ music, which is often shoved into a corner. It’s nice to give artists a spotlight and let them shine. I am especially proud of watching so many of these great acts truly become bigger and better with each year and I look forward to the future where I can watch them on MTV or whatever and say ‘I knew that band when….’ It’s humbling — and I’m proud at the same time.” On personal favorites and highlights: “It’s entirely too hard to pick favorites. But local acts Mattachine Social and The Decepticons will surely wow the crowds. Tenderfoot and Man Plus from Seattle are going to blow people away. I would recommend everyone check out Wishbeard, Kim Delacy, The Slants — I seriously can’t really narrow it down. People should check everyone out!” As we mentioned above, Crush hosts this year, and the festival runs Aug. 2 through Aug. 4 (with a special Maricón post-festival that Saturday night). You can get advance passes here: strangertickets.com/events/8145345/portland-queer-music-festival-2013/. pqmonthly.com
ARTS &PRIDE CULTURE 2013
PONDERLUST PRACTICING PATIENCE IN THE VALLEY OF SEARCH By Erin Rook, PQ Monthly
“There are resources to help you change.” “I’m not sure I want to change,” I say quietly, as if it were really an option. The stapled print out of religious verses on chastity and obedience, with their implications of lifelong repression, feel heavy in my clenched hand. I need time and space to think. The picnic table is constricting me. The best I can muster in one of life’s defining moments is, “I’m not sure.” But I am sure. The prior fall I had read a passage from the Bahá’í Writings at a 9/11 memorial service. It advised: “In the garden of thy heart plant naught but the rose of love, and from the nightingale of affection and desire loosen not thy hold.” Something grew in my big gay heart all right: a hard queer crush on the dreamy, androgynous senior photo editor of my college paper. This new interest combined with my apathy toward Cosmo’s “Guy Without His Shirt” feature flipped a switch. Women’s Studies 100 and Kate Bornstein’s “My Gender Workbook” confirmed it: I was a homosexual. So when an old high school friend reached across the backseat of our friend’s car to touch my hand, I didn’t question what I was feeling. But it was dark that night, and we were among “family.” The rest of the world would be less kind, including my religious parents. A few weeks later, with coffee cart smoothies in hand, we sat in the sunny public park and talked. They still loved me, but we all knew what the Bahá’í Faith — the faith I had freely chosen an inquisitive middle schooler — had to say about homosexuality. Most Bahá’ís I interacted with at the time (the faith has no clergy) treated me with aversion, pity, or outright antagonism. It didn’t make sense. My religion had taught me that women and men are equal, that the soul has no gender, that honesty is paramount, and that faith is all about love. But that same faith labeled my affections as an affliction, threatened to punish me for being myself too flagrantly. So, I took a step back. I resigned as president of the Bahá’í Campus Association I had helped found, sent an email to my Bahá’í classmates explaining my departure, and proceeded to nervously avoid eye contact if they saw me with my girlfriend. In return, they stopped inviting me to holy day observances, gatherings at the Boston Bahá’í Center, and dinners. I’m not sure I blame them.
With one chord cut, the others became weaker and some snapped. I tried alcohol. I stopped fasting. My prayers became infrequent. But I never floated away completely. I reached out to other LGBTQ Bahá’ís online, where we created a closeknit community. Last spring, a few of us video chatted for the first time. I recognized that long-lost feeling of connection that had fed me as a youth. My spirit felt lifted. Emboldened by the support of my farflung virtual family, I recently attended a talk at the Portland Bahá’í Center on “Homosexuality and Social Discourse.” I was nervous. Despite living within walking distance of the center for two years, I’d only attended one or two Bahá’í gatherings in the last decade. I won’t lie — there were a few cringe-worthy moments. Phrases and assumptions that stung. But on the whole, I was pleasantly surprised by how sincerely interested the group was in learning about the experiences of LGBTQ people, in the faith and society. We focused on the following quote from a 2010 letter sent by the Bahá’í Faith’s elected governing body, the Universal House of Justice: “The fundamental purpose of the Faith of Bahá’ú’lláh is the realization of the organic unity of the entire human race, and Bahá’ís are enjoined to eliminate from their lives all forms of prejudice and to manifest respect toward all. Therefore, to regard those with a homosexual orientation with prejudice or disdain would go against the spirit of the Faith. Furthermore, a Bahá’í is exhorted to be ‘an upholder and defender of the victim of oppression,’ and it would be entirely appropriate for a believer to come to the defense of those whose fundamental human rights are being denied or violated.” One attendee asked about the fundamental human rights LGBTQ people are denied and sparked a discussion about struggles we face that have little to do with sex, love, or marriage. Another posited that Bahá’ís may sometimes use Bahá’í law to justify their homophobia, instead of working to root it out like we do racism and sexism. As one of the two out (and possibly only) queer people present, I answered more questions than I asked. And people listened. To an outsider, these may seem like small victories, but I’ll take them. If my parents can look at my relationship and see past who I love to how well they love me, perhaps one day my faith community can shift its focus from my body to my spirit.
Bah-what? Use your Google finger for the basics and hit me up your theological musings at erin@pqmonthly.com. pqmonthly.com
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ARTS & CULTURE MUSIC
Hidden in plain view: A Trans activist REFLECTS on performing at MichFest
Photo by Mariette Pathy Allen
Jenn Burleton, now executive director of TransActive Education & Advocacy, performed at the Michigan Womyn’s Music Festival twice in the late ‘80s and early ‘90s. By Erin Rook PQ Monthly
It’s been more than two decades since musician and trans activist Jenn Burleton performed on stage at the Michigan Women’s Music Festival, but the annual event still maintains its controversial ban on women like her. Though the executive director of TransActive Education & Advocacy is publicly out about her trans identity today, she wasn’t when she played guitar for the thousands of women gathered on “the land” in the late ‘80s and early ‘90s. The musicians she played with have continued to perform the fest, as recently as 2013, though at least one has announced they won’t return next year. A number of
CENTRAL INTELLIGENCE AGENCY Continued from page 9
out. Do you see any similarities between these two states? TB: We’ve joked amongst ourselves that we’re the perfect candidates because we know what it’s like to live a double life. MB: And gaydar, too! I’ve served overseas — I’m an ally, I’m not gay myself — but you learn to serve that dual role and realize it’s part of our mission. You’re serving your country that way. PQ: What about transpeople? Would an out transperson have the same opportunities to serve in the same capacities that a cisgender person would? MB: We have out trans employees at the pqmonthly.com
performers have either pulled out of the 2013 lineup or declined to return in response to a Change.org petition created by trans activist Red Durkin opposing the trans-exclusive admission policy. Burleton shared her unique perspective with PQ Monthly as a trans woman who experienced MichFest both under the radar and in the spotlight. PQ Monthly: What are your thoughts on MichFest’s “women-born-women” admission policy? Jenn Burleton: Having performed at MichFest I think it’s deplorable. I was a pro musician for many years and twice performed there with artists I’d rather not mention. I played guitar in their band. PQ: Did the musicians you were performing with know you were trans? Burleton: No. PQ: Were you aware of the festival’s “women-bornwomen” admission policy when you played there? Burleton: Yes. More so in the ‘90s. I was VERY conflicted about it. I remember not being a very happy camper on stage at the time. But I wasn’t out at all professionally then. It just seemed pointless and driven by ignorance and blind hatred of anything remotely connected to oppressive misogyny. Music is NOT intended to tear people apart. Wrong place, wrong time for that crap. PQ: Aside from the policy, did you notice any anti-trans sentiment while you were in the space? Burleton: From the musicians, mostly not. From a small (but very vocal) percentage of people attending, yes. I just call it the radical lesbian feminist “Fred Phelps Brigade.” It’s the same mindset as the Cathy Brennans and Gallus Mags of the world: hate and ignorance disguised as socio-political opinion. I felt like I would be unsafe (from the actions of certain people) if I came out as trans. On the other hand, I wanted so badly to just step up to the mic and say, “You’ve been enjoying the guitar playing of a trans woman tonight. You’re welcome.” PQ: What do you think is the best way to approach MichFest? A number of musicians who claim to be allies to trans women say they are creating change from within. Do you buy it? Burleton: I don’t buy it. Look, to paraphrase [Artists United Against Apartheid] from the ‘80s: “I Ain’t Gonna Play Sun City.” The way you make change at Michfest is by saying, “OK, you want to have a music festival for women,
CIA — folks have, and some currently are, transitioning at the CIA. It’s really no big deal…. We even have gender-neutral bathrooms at the CIA! PQ: As of late, one of the largest-profile intelligence leaks occurred via a gay-identified person … MB: I have no idea what you’re talking about! TB: He’s talking about Bradley Manning. MB: Oh, that’s not CIA. PQ: It is intelligence, though. MB: I didn’t know he was gay. I’m not sure that directly impacts our organization. PQ: There have been some recent controversies around CIA use of torture. Is there anything you can talk about for LGBT Q community members who may be concerned about that?
but YOU want to be able to decide who is woman enough for your festival, fine. But you’re not going to get top-tier talent anymore.…” Anything other than that is just caving in to the most radicalized and misinformed voices. The Indigo Girls did the right thing by announcing they wouldn’t play there anymore. I wish they’d done it sooner, but hey, they did it. PQ: What do you think draws “top-tier” talent to the festival? Burleton: Exposure to a focused (lesbian/feminist/political) audience and the desire to make music in an environment that celebrates women. For some of the acts (top-tier) it’s also the money, though it’s not GREAT money. But they go because it’s the place to be if you are a “feminist musician.” I went because the band I was playing with was booked there and I wanted to have the experience of playing before an amazing audience of thousands of women. But for me, I didn’t really care too much whether they all had vaginas (natural or surgically constructed). PQ: So do you support the boycott? Burleton: Yes, I do. PQ: Would you stop supporting a musician who performed there? Burleton: Probably, yes, assuming they didn’t go there and take the opportunity to make some kind of statement opposing the policy. I mean, I stopped going to Mel Gibson movies. Seems consistent to me. PQ: Where is the line where you say, “Sorry, not supporting you anymore?” Burleton: Well, it’s certainly more nuanced than a simple “yes/no.” Look, if I wasn’t “out” and went to MichFest after being booked as a female artist and while there, I said, “Glad you all enjoyed my music. I’m a transwoman, and the organizers of this event need to get their heads out of their asses,” I would hope that my fans would continue to support me. In general though, if an artist says, “Hey, I don’t agree with the policy, but I’m going to play there anyway,” then yeah, I’m going to stop supporting them. PQ: Would you play there again if you thought no one would be the wiser? Or if they changed the policy? Burleton: Oh, HELL NO to the first part of that question and yes to the second part of the question. I still beat myself up for not saying something years ago when I played there. Honestly, it was NOT one of my prouder moments in life. For more on the MichFest debate, see “In and out: Defining membership and identity within LGBTQ spaces” on page 14.
MB: No. I’d have to refer you to the Office of Public Affairs. PQ: Has this came up at all in your work as LGBTW liaison in terms of people asking about this? MB: No. You’re the first person to ask. PQ: Honestly, I’m surprised to hear that. MB: My response, if I got that kind of question, is that we’re not here to talk about that. We’re here to talk about being LGBT at the CIA, and our careers and stories. We’re just not here to talk about that. PQ: Can you talk at all about usage of drones or other unmanned vehicles for surveillance outside of the U.S.? MB: I know nothing other than what I’ve read in the press about that. I haven’t been privileged to those programs. PQ: So, that’s just a specialized thing
within certain sectors of the agency? MB: We operate in a very need-to-know basis at the CIA. If we don’t have a need to know about a program, we’re not going to go prying and try to learn about the programs. PQ: Again, I’m surprised — in your outreach you don’t get questions about intelligence leaks, about torture, about drones? This hasn’t come up in your conversations with the LGBTQ community? TB: No, it really hasn’t. MB: It’s the press that ask about those things. In the environment we’re operating in — and maybe it’s out of respect for the program and what we’re doing — people don’t ask those kinds of questions. We’re not here to talk about that. That’s generally enough. July-August 2013 • 29
ARTS & CULTURE
Lady Bunny on Portland and playing the Pony: ‘I’m packing an extra girdle’ By Daniel Borgen
Records, is small but very enthusiastic. I always say if I’m doing different jobs then I can’t get bored. So adding songwriting and recording to acting, comedy, DJing, and activism just makes my jobs that much more varied and fun. I think I’ll start modeling when I’m 60.” You know you’re a legend if Rupaul says you’re one. There was a moment on this The last time Bunny was in Portland, she played to a packed house at the now-defunct past season’s “Drag Race,” during Snatch Game, when runner-up Alaska Thunderfuck Red Cap. For the record, I promised her a much bigger, sweatier crowd at Blow Pony — announced she’d be imitating Lady Bunny. Ru, naturally, cautioned her and pressed her and I asked if we could get a more flattering photograph of the two of us. — are you sure you can do it? “We can definitely get a picture, but it’s been a few years so I can’t promise it’ll be more Bunny is a legend, a very distinct personality, and those are some big flattering,” she says. “I liked Red Cap, but I also got to hang with a lesbian heels to fill. While Alaska would never be mistaken for Bunny, she friend who lives in a gorgeous residence apartment building with did an admirable job tackling her look and persona — enough solar panels on the roof and every amenity. It was fancy, yet so that she got the attention of the Lady in question. hip. New Yorkers need to be reminded that other cities “I enjoyed both Ivy’s [last season’s ‘Ms. Congenihave it going on, too. And the food in Portland! I’m ality’] and Alaska’s impersonations of me,” Lady packing an extra girdle.” Bunny says. “I think they both captured my Lady Bunny’s show marks the latest in a demented essence — and they’re so much semi-long line of appearances by famous thinner, too!” queens in Portland that has drag afiDemented essence is a pretty apt cionados over the moon. Heklina description. But add to demented Hek lina and Jack ie Beat bot h dashes of hilarious and witty. recently played a, um, smaller My friend Ryan and I spend venue. an inordinate amount of time “I’m not familiar with thinking about and talking those queens, are they new?” about drag queens — espeBunny asks. “They sound cially the legends — and beastly. In all honesty, I Lady Bunny came up know very little about (again) after I watched Blow Pony, but my “To Wong Foo” for the booking agent assures 20th time and simulme it’s the Portland taneously found out hotspot.” Indeed, I’d be chatting with Bunny, indeed. her for this edition Ryan, who helped of the gay newspacook up questions per (ahead of Bunfor this chat, insisted ny’s appearance at on this query: “Ask Blow Pony at the end Bunny why Rupaul of July). became so famous “Do you think she and she’s still doing does lots of drugs?” I hand jobs in the asked Ryan. “I doubt port authority bathit,” he said. “She’s too room.” Bunny’s retort: quick and clever to be “I guess my hand jobs hopped up.” Add those, are better than Ru’s.” too: quick and clever. “ B u t s e r i o u s l y,” And while Lady Bunny continues, “Ru Bunny is really known has a lways gone for a for her parody, raunchy more mainstream appeal comedy, movie cameos, than I have. If reality TV and gravity-defying hair to the shows are in, he does one. heavens, this time around she’s I’m a little more counter-culpulling a bit of a Madonna — ture than that. And raunchier and dabbling reinvention. On the and less politically correct. But heels of a pair of duets with Rupaul, she’s my sister and we share a love Bunny is set to conquer the world — or of twisted humor cultivated in Atlanta at least the dance floors — with “Take Me and New York when we were roomies. Up High,” a hook-filled wonder, and her first That sick humor isn’t part of her public persolo release in almost a decade. sona — but trust me, it’s there!” “I wrote ‘Take Me Up’ high about my cholesterol,” One can almost imagine these queens waxing Bunny says. “OK, I’m kidding. I write a lot of parody songs, nostalgic about their time together on the very first “Drag which I’ll also be performing in Portland. So I’ve always dabRace,” way back when. bled in songwriting — whether it’s duets with Ru on his albums or In terms of marriage and the partial DOMA reversal, Lady Bunny Photo by Billy Erb something here or there on an occasional soundtrack. I waited forever to do has no plans to change her single ways, and she kindly declined my marriage this and now it’s time. The lyrics are classic summer party jam — nothing too heavy, just proposal. (I event sent my headshot.) get out and dance. Dance like we used to when the music was better. Sorry, Rihanna.” “I’m a confirmed bachelorette,” she says. “No gay marriage for me, thanks! But you Her legions of fans have embraced the new sound, and the idea of a “dried up old blonde mentioned ‘head’ and ‘shot,’ and that’s already sounding pretty good to me.” in her 50s shaking her ass to a dance single.” (Remind you of anyone?) “Fans still get both from me — parody and real singles,” Bunny assures us. “I’m thrilled Lady Bunny appears at Blow Pony July 27. Doors at Rotture open at 9 p.m. And “Take by the response to the new song. We just cracked the very bottom of the Billboard Dance Me Up High” is available on iTunes and wherever fine singles are sold. Says Ru: “Dare you chart, so I’m elated. Hey, it’s a start, folks, so request it when you’re out. My label, Lybra not to move your body. I’m living for this.” PQ Monthly
30 • July-August 2013
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July-August 2013 • 31
32 • July-August 2013
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PRIDE
ID CHECK TWELVE MONTHS OUT By Leela Ginelle PQ Monthly
I normally don’t plan too far ahead. Usually, I do things right away, or I don’t do them. Today, though, I’m planning for something a year from now, because if I did it right now, I’d probably lose my mind. I’m going to have gender confirming surgery, if all goes to plan, next year at this time. I’ll board a plane to Thailand, see some sites, check into a hospital, and pay a surgeon to turn my penis into a vagina. That can all be written in one sentence, but what it means is still a little hard to comprehend. When I started transitioning, I had no idea what I was doing. I grew up before there were rights for trans people, before there was an internet, and before I knew that what I’m doing now was possible. I knew vaguely that there were “transsexuals,” but I wasn’t in a place where I could fathom becoming one, even if I wanted to. Having received sustained disapproval from my family around my gender from an early age, I wasn’t sure I did. I’m two and a half years into my own transition now, though, and I’m ready for the next step. There are all sorts of things I don’t like about what I’m planning to do. First, between air travel, anesthetics, and surgery, I’m risking my life far more than I usually do. Second, I’m somehow unimpeachably, at least in my mind, forfeiting male privilege. In the past year and a half, I’ve legally changed my gender and amended my birth certificate so that, retroactively, I’ve never been anything but female. And yet what I’m planning feels final in a way those acts didn’t. Please don’t take this to mean that I equate gender with genitals, because I don’t. What I do mean is that considering walking around without a penis, after a lifetime of walking around with one, is scary. I don’t want the one I have, but I have no idea what not having one will be like. That’s part of what I meant about needing to plan for a year. I’m not a psychologist, but having spent the past two and a half years watching my identity drift slowly from male to female, I can say it’s not something to rush. Prior to my orchiectomy, and beginning on estrogen, I similarly fretted about the changes my body would undergo: breasts, hips, soft skin, long hair, etc. Those were the changes I wanted, but they were also the ones that would signal I was no longer male, which seemed, in some ways, like handing over bars of gold to the bank of patriarchy.
That was almost two ye a r s a g o, and those changes have all happened, and I’m happier and like my body and myself more. I still feel shame, though, when I think of my penis, perhaps because genitals themselves are considered shameful, and transgender people tend to think about ours exponentially more than cisgender people do — or perhaps because I wish mine were different. When my transition was just beginning, I wrestled with myself, saying gender expression shouldn’t be that important, because I was afraid of what changing my gender would mean. When I started desiring gender confirming surgery, I didn’t want to repeat the same debates. Maybe the debates are useful, though, because they help me see what I’m afraid of, and what’s important to me. I visualize what life will be like after the operation, and what changes most is the way I feel inside. I don’t know whether anyone else will know I’ve had a gender-confirming surgery, but I’ll know, and thinking about what life will feel like at that time is intense. There’s joy, fear, and confusion. I’m a woman, and that’s still hard to admit to myself, and the confusion seems to stem from that difficulty. Any woman with a penis who had the opportunity to have the surgery I’m planning to have would want it, I suspect, but somehow it’s hard for me to express that desire to myself. But I keep expressing it with my actions: gathering letters from professionals, updating my passport, raising and earning the money I’ll need, and keeping a journal to record what it’s like to go on this journey from where I was to here. Some days, it’s just about doctor visits, or interactions with the surgeon’s office, and some days it’s about processing overwhelming amounts of fear. It usually doesn’t feel like much is changing, even when I write something that seems enormous at the time, because, when I put it away, I’m still me. Looking back two and a half years, though, I’d say almost everything has changed, and for the better. When I look ahead, despite the fear and confusion, I predict I’ll be happy, as well, because I’ll be myself, only more so.
Leela Ginelle is a playwright and journalist living in Portland, Ore. You can write her at leela@pqmonthly.com.
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July-August 2013 • 33
PERSPECTIVES
WHISKEY & SYMPATHY
Dear Gula and Sophia,
I’m a personal of ample size who is getting back into the dating game after a long break. Problem is I sometimes have trouble discerning the difference between people who are attracted to me as a human being and those who have a fetish for large partners. I do not want to be fetishized, I want to be loved. Where is the line between attraction and fetish, and how do I tell the difference? Or am I just letting my own hang-ups get the best of me?
-Heavy Heart in Hillsboro
Dear Triple H,
As a woman of size myself I can completely relate with individuals being drawn to you for the size and not YOU. It’s something that comes with the territory when you have a trait that stands out as “different.” However there are certain clues that can assist you in determining if your suitor is following their heart and passion or their loin-driven fetish — like the topic of discussion, the way they handle you, and how you two interact. Now ... in saying this, there is a major difference in being someone’s personal preference and being a fetish. When someone is interested in another, they typically would like to talk about your hobbies and interests or career choice. They want to know what you like and what you dislike. If they seem to only focus on issues related to size, then that is a major tip off. If their conversations mainly focus around what size you wear, if you were large you’re entire life, or how much they love big girls, it may be a sign that they want to date the fat and not the person. Think of how you are addressed or talked to. When approached, is most of the conversation about your size, your weight, or your anything else “size” related? OR do they engage in conversation about your interests and other issues that are not related to your size? That can be a major factor. Notice if they constantly refer to your size when discussing how beautiful or attractive you are. Do they mention your beautiful eyes, soft skin, cute little wink that you do ... or do you only hear mentions of your size, fat, or height/girth? The fact that you are a curvaceous babe should not be the only reason they are dating you. I don’t think you have hang-ups, I think you may be guarded. And you have every right to be. Just be sure to enter every engagement with an open mind and heart. Don’t always assume they are a fat fetishist. Go out on dates, have hook-ups, or whatever it is that your heart desires. Just take note of the interactions and you’ll be able to figure out the real ones from the phony ones.
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Heavy Heart,
I have always been on the robust side of life and in my early day my friends were thin and I thought everyone wanted them. I would go to the club and feel like a dark little shadow cast from the six-foot blond god that I would party with.One night there were three guys in line to chat with my friend and I ended up “babesitting” them. I had great conversation and each of the candidates passed my tests as datable men. The end of the night came and my friend didn’t want any of them. WHAT?! Come to find out my friend was looking for a man of size! He might have had a slight fetish but he knew the shape he found attractive. He ended up marrying a man of size and they are happy in love. I thought no one would ever like my size until I hit my 30s. When it rains, it pours! There were men coming out of the woodwork to check me out! The view of what’s hot had changed! Today it is a little more acceptable to date a cute little chunky dunk. In the past poisonous little twinks would tear you apart when you walked in, but now they say, “Grrr!” A big boy makes you wanna snuggle. My views had changed as well. I thought I wanted a sculpted marble man with blond hair and a tan, when in reality I loved curling up next to my very average beer-bellied man who is missing some hair but had some cascading down his back. To me that is love — where I feel safe. Marble makes for a bad pillow! When it comes to you and your self-esteem, that is another story. You have to deal with some kind fetish in your life. Do you have red hair? There are many people out there with a hankering for a ginger. Or do you have tattoos? Piercings? Look like an ethnic group? There are things about all of us that others can find attractive almost to a fetish state. When it comes to size, it’s just another on the list. Happiness comes from you and feeling good about yourself. If that means a smaller you, then I say hit that gym and let go of that hang-up.
XOXOX Gula Delgatto
Need some advice from Sophia and Gula? Send your query — with “Whiskey & Sympathy” in the subject line — to info@pqmonthly.com.
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Sophia St. James has been an erotic entertainer since 1996. She has traveled performing and educating the public on self confidence, self worth, and the art of sensuality no matter their outer appearance. Working as a sex and sensuality educator, sex toy/product reviewer, adult film director/producer, model, and erotic visual performer, Sophia is a well rounded woman with drive and determination. Sophia is also a mother and healthcare professional who takes pride in being a body positive and sex positive fierce femme.
Gula Delgatto’s life began in a small rural farming town in Romaina. She was scouted singing in a rocky field picking potatoes by a producer of a “Mickey Mouse Club” type ensemble. While touring the Americas the group fell apart due to jealousies and drugs. She later transitioned from Vaudeville to starring on the big screen to woman’s prison, and eventually advised the Dali Lama on fashion n-stuff. Currently she’s taking her life knowledge and giving back in an advice column for PQ.
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FOREVER: FIVE THOUGHTS ON MARRIAGE By Nick Mattos PQ Monthly
1) It is 2005, and I’m 21. My boyfriend, who is older but not much wiser, staggers beside me on the streets of Olympia, Wash. We are flushed with love and whiskey, walking home from the bar hand-in-hand. “What do you think about marriage?” he asks me, apropos of nothing. “I want to get married someday,” I say back to him, my words slurring slightly. “You?” “Yeah, me too,” he says. “I bet gay people will be able to get married someday, too.” “Yeah!” I reply. “It only makes sense.” “When do you think that’ll happen?” “I don’t know,” I reply, turning to him to put my arms around him. “But when it does, will you marry me?” He stops, looks at me with grave, drunken shock. “Nick,” he says slowly, “did you just propose?” I think for a moment. “Yeah, baby,” I say softly. “I did.” He hesitates, then looks me in the eyes, tears welling up. “Yes,” he says, and then kisses me. 2) Mormons believe that have existed and will exist forever — that you are a literal son or daughter of God “in the similitude of the universal Father and Mother.” You were crafted at the creation of the world, and spent a good long time in what is called “the pre-existence.” There, while waiting to take on a physical body and be born in the world, you interact with other spirits. Most American Mormons believe that it is during this time that you meet and create the foundations of a romantic relationship which will come to fruition during the time that you both live on Earth. “Pray earnestly for your wife!” one home teacher exclaimed emphatically to me at age 19, shouting and spitting in my face. “She is out there, and she is praying for you to find her because she misses you terribly! You have known each other forever and one day you will be sealed for time and eternity with her again!” This is a charming, hopeful way to think about love — but even in the wild, strange world of Latter-Day Saint beliefs, pre-existence romance isn’t sanctioned doctrine. Many years after I left the church, I discovered that the concept actually emerged from — wait for it — a delightfully campy, must-see Mormon musical from the ‘70s called “Saturday’s Warrior.” The concept of pre-existence romance so captured the LDS imagination that it has become standard folk belief in Mormon circles. I point this out to say: when we talk
about marriage, we are certainly talking about something that has doctrines behind it, both religious and legal — but we are also talking about folk beliefs, some of which masquerade as legitimate despite having little to no basis in actual doctrine. This is where the trouble begins. 3) I’m 22 and my newly-ex-fiancé is on the floor in front of me, wailing. “How can you leave me!?” he howls. “We were supposed to be together forever!” “This just isn’t working,” I say, trying to keep calm, praying earnestly not to fall to the floor and join him in his wailing. “But Nick!” he screams. “We were supposed to get married!” “We can’t,” I say, letting the ambiguity of the statement move throughout the room with the sound waves of his sobs. 4) Was I ever actually ready to get married? I think back to my Olympia fiancé and can safely say no, that in the light and heat of being 21 I certainly wasn’t. Maybe marriage isn’t about readiness, though; perhaps it’s about deciding to become ready, to call the community around you and state, “Listen up, family, friends, government, God, everyone. We’re going to try to make this work forever, but we can’t do it on our own.” Perhaps the marriage certificate, and the wedding dress, and the Jordan almonds that the guests receive are all just a coded plea, a means of crying out to everyone who can hear: “Please, please, please help us make this relationship work.” I could not make that cry then, and perhaps I never will — but I am willing to be surprised. 5) “Marriage equality passes in Washington,” the headline reads. I sit in my messy Southeast Portland apartment at age 29, for all intents and purposes a full world away from the life I led in Olympia eight years ago. I pick up my telephone, find my ex’s number to call him; as I hit “call,” I compose what it is I will say. “Hey mister, it finally happened!” I imagine myself saying to him. “Can you believe it? Did you ever think we’d see this?” A recorded voice answers. “This number has been disconnected or is no longer in service,” she says with cheerful equanimity. I listen to her say it twice, then hold the phone in front of me, listening to her repeat herself. We are held together by so many things — the community around us, the promises we make, the infrastructure that protects our rights and records these messages saying that the world has changed, that you’ve changed too, that “forever” is a long and uncertain length of time, one which promises only surprises. I sigh softly as the phone hangs up.
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Nick Mattos can be reached at nick@pqmonthly.com. pqmonthly.com
July-August 2013 • 37
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38 • July-August 2013
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ARTS BRIEFS THE FUN STUFF PERSPECTIVES
Portland’s KQAC, one of the nation’s few surviving classical music radio stations, announced that it will move to a sunny new office in the Hampton Opera Center (211 SE Caruthers, Portland) when its current lease expires in December. The great news for listeners: the move doubles the station’s space, allowing the station to invite its listeners to live performances by local and visiting musicians. “This new home will not only change the setting in which we work, giving our professional staff a healthier environment, but it will also change the entire dynamic of how we serve the people of our region,” said station president and CEO Jack Allen in a press release. “Updated broadcast booths and production rooms will improve the focus of work and the quality of our sound. Adding a performance studio will Photo by Patti Miller allow for intimate live concert broadcasts. We Local marvel Natasha Kmeto is among the 45 acts that will thrill you at this year’s PDX Pop Now. are thrilled to be taking this important step into the future.” For more info — and to live-stream PDX Pop Now celebrates its 10th year of being an outra- KQAC’s world-class programming — visit AllClassical.org. geously awesome music festival, July 19-21. Among the 45 bands piling onto two stages in The Eastbank Lot (SE Water Want to adorn your home and body while supporting local & SE Salmon, Portland) for this year’s offering are Danger- queer artisans and their projects? Traipse down to Market ous Boys Club, Gaytheist, Genders, Magic Mouth, Natasha Q’s Art Rummage Sale on July 28, 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. The Q Kmeto, Ramona Falls, The We Shared Milk, Y La Bamba, Center parking lot (4115 N. Mississippi, Portland) will be and Youthbitch. The festival is free and open to all ages, so packed full of artisans selling their work and rummage sale bring your kids and turn them on to Portland’s best acts. For mavens hocking their wares; proceeds benefit the Market Q full lineups, schedules, and a variety of other things to get you community store and work-training program. For more info, pumped, check out PDXPopNow.com. visit PDXQCenter.org.
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Portlandia, the 35-foot high cooper statue on the façade of the Portland Building, is certainly a beloved figure; however, she’s also just one representation of the glory and diversity of our fair city. In an effort to create “a multitude of new Portlandias,” local gem Anthony Hudson presents Queering Portlandia, a community photobooth in the Portland Building Installation Space (1120 SW 5th Ave., Portland). “Queering is essentially to make something queer, different, to make it anti-oppressive,” Hudson explains. “Queering here is to make Portlandia accessible again, giving an underprivileged audience a chance to recreate Portlandia in their own image.” To do so, the installation space will be transformed into a photo booth/performance set full of costumes and props that participants can use to perform their own expression of what Portlandia means to them. Until Aug. 2, photographs will be taken Monday through Thursday from noon to 2 p.m.; the pictures will be assembled into the installation over the course of the month. Not keen on having your picture taken? The installation will be available for viewing on weekdays from 7 a.m. to 6 p.m. PQ has such a huge crush on artist Pablo Cáceres — or Pablito, as we croon to ourselves as we gaze upon his whimsical, sexy digital portraits of bears having fun. We also have a bit of a thing for big, sexy beards. In other words, Pablito’s Big Bearded Art Show at the Tonic Lounge (3100 NE Sandy, Portland) on July 22 thrills us down to the core. From 7 p.m. to 10 p.m., the bar will be full of fur, both from Pablito’s work as well as the city’s most hirsute handsomeness; drink specials and random surprises will keep everyone mingling and touching one another’s faces in glee. For more info and to gaze upon the majesty of Pablito’s work, visit pablitoart.tumblr.com/.
Okay, this one requires some Beatlemania-style screaming, so start yelling now and then read on: queer hip-hop deities Yo! Majesty, Boy Funk, and SistaFist are playing a free show on Aug. 1 at the Alhambra Theatre (4811 SE Hawthorne, Portland)! Seriously, melt to the floor in a puddle of excitement right now. Doors open at 8:30 p.m.; sorry, kids, this is 21+. For more info, go to TheBoyFunk.com or SistaFist.com.
Slow it down at Farm*Time: On Land Practices of Embodied Engagement, a three-day workshop at Prior Day Farm in St. John’s. Drawing from the disciplines of butoh, pranayama, contemplative practice, and creative writing, this intensive workshop (facilitated by Mizu Desierto and Douglas Allen and presented by Water In The Desert) aims to open and reveal core creative truths through ritual explorations of time and movement. Participants will come back from Farm*Time with tools to enable them to better incorporate empathetic sensitivity, microscopic awareness, somatic intelligence and playfulness into their art and their lives. The workshop runs Aug. 8-10; registration is $150 if registered by July 21 and $200 afterward. For information, times, exact location, and registration, visit WITD.org. Are you ready to MEXICAN ROCK!? Obviously — you were BORN READY. Get your tickets now for the Jagermeister Music Tour’s presentation of Portland favorite Edna Vázquez’s band No Passengers along with Mexico City’s Molotov at the Roseland Theater on Aug. 17. Show starts at 8 p.m.; tickets are $32 and available from TicketsWest outlets and TicketsWest.com.
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THE GOOD LIFE
Cultivating Life MUSIC
DETOXIFY WITH A COCKTAIL
By LeAnn Locher PQ Monthly
Ju s t t h i n k o f it as multi tasking. You’re drinking your vitamins and getting a buzz. You’re increasing your greens and enjoying tequila at the same time. Can you detox and imbibe at the same time? I think you know where I’m going with this: OF COURSE YOU CAN. And this is the time of year to do it, when our local produce tastes like food of the gods and flavors soar due to freshness. That’s the key to these tasty and healthy cocktails: use the freshest produce possible. May I recommend visiting your local farmers market on a weekend morning, and whipping up a few cocktails Saturday evening? It may even help you feel better in the morning. I set out to explore this recently, on a quest to bring you some new ideas and guides for nutritious summer cocktailing. The things I do for you, dear readers. There are three ways to use produce in your cocktails: muddle, juice, or infuse. Muddling breaks down the fruit by hand, usually directly into the glass, but leaves bits to chew. Any produce that is soft works well here, and can even be better when joined with freshly picked herbs. Muddling crushes them, and you can smell the goodness of it all while you’re crafting your cocktail. Juicing — or blending — your produce breaks it down into a liquid format. Margaritas made with handfuls of fresh strawberries, ice, tequila, and lime? I swoon. Forget that syrupy crap called mixers. The real deal tastes so much better and is so much better for you. Third up is infusing. It requires a longer-term commitment, but also allows for a longer shelf life of your summer sips. Vodka is the most common and popular alcohol to infuse, but any of the light spirits — like gin or light rum — can be used to store the taste of the season. Here’s a recipe and some ideas for using fresh seasonal produce in your summer cocktails, using these three different techniques. Muddle: Cucumber Gin Fizz Cool as a cucumber is true: cucumber’s cooling properties come from being so hydrating, plus they deliver minerals and silica, which is great for your skin. Combine with lime, and you have a boost of calcium, folate, and antioxidant limonoids. Plus, adding lime to any drink brightens the flavor.
In a cocktail shaker, muddle three to four thick slices of cucumber, half of a lime cut into quarters, and a teaspoon of raw sugar. This should take a minute or two, until the cucumbers and sugar have all but dissolved. Fill cocktail shaker with ice, add 2 ounces of gin, and shake vigorously. (The more you shake, the more calories you’re burning.) Strain into a glass of ice, top with seltzer water, and garnish with more cucumber if you like. Juice/blend: Drama Mama Are you starting your mornings with green smoothies? Why not incorporate them into your cocktail hour, too? That’s double righteousness in one day. I like to think all of that good stuff cancels the alcohol. Beet juice delivers an astonishing dose of nitrates and antioxidants which, in turn, can reduce blood pressure and improve heart health. Combined with the powerhouse antioxidants blueberries and strawberries, you have a tasty, healthy, and dramatic cocktail in your glass. Did I mention coconut water? Read on. In a blender, make your juice by combining one peeled beet, three strawberries, and a handful of blueberries. Add coconut water as you blend to control the consistency. Pour your juice into a high ball glass filled with ice and 1.5 ounces of light rum. Top with a squeeze of fresh lime. Infuse: Raspberry Vodka Summer In a Glass If you haven’t had a cocktail infused with summer’s fresh berries, you haven’t had my favorite cocktail of all. Simplicity, simplicity, simplicity. In a mason jar, cram a handful of fragrant red raspberries, and fill with decent quality vodka. Shake, and let stand in your cupboard for a few weeks. Visit it once a week to check on its progress, to shake again, and sample if you like. After about two to three weeks, strain the vodka from the raspberries and pour into a clean jar. Store and save for sips over the coming year, especially in December when you’re dreaming of that summer day you made it. Serve cleanly with ice, lime juice, and soda water. Other infusions to try: goji berries, lavender, or lemon verbena picked fresh from the garden. A note about mixers: I’ve included coconut water and soda water for mixers in these recipes, but also consider tangy kombucha for both its vinegary flavor punch and its health benefits of detoxification, immune boosting, and improved digestion.
LeAnn Locher is a home arts badass and loves to connect with readers online at facebook.com/sassygardener.
40 • July-August 2013
EAT, DRINK, AND, BE MARY CREATIVE CONCOCTIONS By Brock Daniels PQ Monthly
The temperature has reached those rare mid-90s in downtown Portland and my frozen treat is thawing faster than preferred. I keep licking around my homemade cone but drips of sweetened liquefied cream stream down my fingers. I switch my cone to the other hand in hopes of quickly remedying my melting dilemma, and realize the only thing that is going to work is to eat faster. Portland’s own farm-to-cone ice cream shop, Salt & Straw, is more than the quintessential local ice cream shop; they go to great lengths to source only the best local, sustainable, and organic ingredients Oregon has to offer. Unique and creative f lavor combinations are united in a high butterfat ice cream made using loca l, a ll-natura l cream from the Willamette Valley. The low sweetness level and very little air churned in the ice cream intent iona l ly h ig h l ig ht t he added ingredients. Pieces of ripe, smooth, sweet Bartlett pears from Salem mingle flawlessly with aged crumbles of Rogue Creamery’s Crater Lake Blue Cheese in a scoop of the Pear
tion: the Honey Balsamic Strawberry with Cracked Pepper. Honey balsamic vinegar from a third-generation Oregon beekeeper at Honey Ridge Farms and black pepper from Pohnpei expertly balance this frozen treat. Besides making delicious ice cream, Salt & Straw owner Kim Malek shares that they are “hoping to create the kind of company
that’s fun to support, work for, and partner with. We’re about building strong local community — both in the neighborhoods where we do business and by purchasing as many local products as possible to keep our money in Oregon and help create stronger local economies.” Join the gang at any of the three Salt & Straw locations next week on Sunday, July 21, and celebrate National Ice Cream Day with a scoop or two of your favorite concoctions. Support local, eat ice cream!
Salt & Straw Scoop Shops: and Blue Cheese ice cream. Cold, soft, and incredibly silky, this uncommon couple is highlighted in this favorite Salt & Straw signature blend. Oregon Hill Farms in Saint Helens supplies the strawberry foundation in another creative ice cream selec-
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Brock Daniels, a Pacific Northwest native, has studied wine, culinary arts, gastronomy, and loves researching new food. Brock has written a self-published cookbook titled “Our Year in the Kitchen.” Reach him at brock@pqmonthly.com. pqmonthly.com
THE FUN STUFF
QUEER APERTURE Through his Queer Aperture project, photographer Jeffrey Horvitz has spent years documenting the LGBTQ communities of Portland, San Francisco, Seattle, and Vancouver, B.C. He’s well aware that a picture paints a whole mess of words, but here he offers a few actual words to better acquaint us with his dynamic subjects. What is your name? Greg Kerr How long have you lived in Portland? Four years When was the first time you noticed that gayness existed? When I was a kid, I was attracted to boys before I knew what gay was. What would you consider a guilty pleasure? Macaroni & cheese and donuts
Photo by Jeffrey Horvitz
You’re having a dinner party of six; whom would you invite? Austin, Margaret Cho, Freddie Mercury, Michelangelo, Gerard Butler (in a kilt)
What would you consider a perfect meal? Pizza after sex What would be a perfect day off? Sleeping in, strong coffee, delicious breakfast, quiet peaceful day outdoors with a calm mind Favorite book? “The Little Prince” Favorite movie? “Showgirls”
Favorite swear word? Fuck What is your profession? I work for a nonprofit. I f yo u c o u l d c h a n g e yo u r profession with a snap of a finger, what would you like to be? Artist Whom would you like to meet, dead or alive? Jesus
Favorite word? Fuck Least favorite word? Goodbye For more Queer Aperture visit, queeraperture.com
ASTROSCOPES WITH MISS RENEE Miss Renee aka Tarot Chick is an empath, tarot card reader, and spiritual astrologer of 20 years based out of N. Portland’s Kenton neighborhood. She loves love notes so feel free to holla or schedule a tarot/astrology chart session: that_tarot_chick@yahoo.com.
Miss Renee aka Tarot Chick. Email her to make an apointment
that_tarot_chick@yahoo.com
GEMINI Psst! I’m gonna let you in on the secret of July/ August, Tribe Gemini. Listening? 1. Know your worth. 2. Create a financial plan. 3. Discipline your day to day habits/schedule. Do these things and watch how multiple planets in your houses of finance, work/ training, and career/ambition bless you again and again.
CANCER How we view ourselves is directly linked to how we ARIES treat ourselves. A grand water trine between Cancer, “Lessons in Keeping My Cool” is the title of your Scorpio, and Pisces + other planetary action = July/ 30-day autobiography, Aries. Temptation to shout August being months to give yourself PERMISSION louder and push harder will be great and so will to change, dare, create and make priority play and your conviction. You may well be right, but it’s more self-care time, and create a personal philosophy about getting things done with efficiency than it is that leaves you more free. Revamping career aspiabout bludgeoning your way past the opposition, rations likely. Bamm Bamm. TAURUS Bulls are moving quickly. Sharp learning curves and mindful communication in relationships/partnerships are top themes with opportunities to move life forward in the home and recreate yourself at work via studying, writing, teaching, speaking. Hopefully you’ve cherry-picked friends, lovers, and business/ creative partners these last months, making now the time to create new solid foundations and intimacy. #TORO!
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LEO This is a very “Saturnian” (discipline, responsibility, maturity, boundaries) month for you as Saturn moves directly into the home/family sector of your chart, likely leaving you with an emotionally new understanding of what your responsibilities there are/ aren’t. Delays, Me vs. We, “No!,” and Aha! moments remind you that diamonds are formed under pressure. #KellyClarkstonStronger VIRGO “Your word is your wand” means what you say you
manifest. This is especially true for you now as Saturn (maturity, responsibility, discipline) moves forward in your third house (Communication). Be impeccable with your word; you affect people more than you realize. Mars (energy/action) and Jupiter (luck/growth) bless you with dynamic, inspiring new friendships.
houses of your chart are prepping you for this via subconscious spelunking, revisiting childhood experiences, and a slowly blossoming heart.
CAPRICORN “Give me your heart. Make it real. Or else forget about it.” - Rob Thomas, “Smooth.” A powerful grand water trine touches all three sectors regarding varLIBRA ious types of relationships/partnerships. Nurture a The past months asked you to develop a game plan new appreciation, gratitude, and desire for depth/ in regards to building your self-worth, finances, and nurturing/beauty in friendships. All who “mean it” giving yourself permission/courage to revamp your are welcome. Late July-August offer pleasure travel public face. July/August lends a sense of stability and hosting opportunities. here and in relationships, too. Your mind is sharp AQUARIUS and clear now; feel free to sing birds out of trees. I hope you’re proud of all the hard work you’ve been SCORPIO doing. Focus on getting acclimated/finding your Being dedicated/committed in who you are and groove now. Your ruler, Uranus, retrogrades in your what you’re putting out there via your body, how third house (Communication) saying work smarter you come across to others, and being sensible/ not harder here; put yourself on a cell phone/email/ practical in your approach to getting things done laptop/information curfew/diet. Give your mind a rest is highlighted now. Planetary action in your ninth and power off. #middaynamaste house (belief systems, higher education) challenges you to question/release/revamp old pro- PISCES Play more and worry less, mermaid/man! Multiple grams. #grownupstuff planets in your Fun/Romance/Creativity/Children SAGITTARIUS sector ask you to let your inner child out. If you’ve Before a snake sheds its skin its eyes get milky, forgotten how to relax and play, remind yourself its skin dulls, and it hides/gets defensive. But soon or find someone/thing to show you. Stop sweating the eyes clear, old skin sheds, and new shiny skin finances. This is your chance to meet/show a difis revealed. Planetary action in three of the “deep” ferent side of yourself. #Hoolahoops&bubbleguns July-August 2013 • 41
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