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TRANS TRAILBLAZER AMY INVISIBLE DEFUNKT’S SASHA RAY QUEERS ‘FIRE ISLAND’ BUCHERT
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SPRING! SPRING! SPRING!
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Ah, glorious springtime in the Pacific Northwest. Blossoming trees, chicks hatching in our neighbors’ hand-built coops, the occasional snowfall (?!?!), and queer newspapers shooting up seemingly out of nowhere. PQ Monthly officially launched February 16 with our first print issue and a launch party at the Jupiter Hotel —not to mention our after-shindig at Crush (which, come to think of it, might have been an appropriate name for the launch party; we were packed in like super sexy sardines!). The excitement expressed by the community at the event was wonderful and overwhelming. It felt like a big family gathering, except with professional photographers and way fewer alcohol-fueled arguments. We are so grateful to all who attended — and to everyone who has provided feedback about our first issue on social media, our website (pqmonthly. com), and via email. Keep the suggestions, critiques, and questions coming! We at PQ Monthly are well aware that at times there will be disagreements over what we should cover, whose opinions should receive ink, and what our role is as an advocate for the queer community and its institutions. We want to make it clear that we view it as our obligation to be a voice for the community’s opinions and concerns — both majority and minority. Inclusion of a particular person’s or group’s viewpoint is not an indication that PQ Monthly’s writers, owner, sales people, or other staff share that opinion. Switching gears back to the subject of celebration, we just didn’t get enough of our beautiful people at the launch party. We want face time with y’all on a regular basis, so we’ll be throwing a PQ Press Party the third Thursday of every month, which also happens to be the day you can get your hands on freshly-printed copies of PQ Monthly. Our first PQ Press Party will be March 15, 5 p.m.-8 p.m., at the Local Lounge (3536 NE Martin Luther King Jr Blvd, Portland). See our Facebook page (please “like” us if you haven’t already!) for details on this and all upcoming get-togethers. The locations will rotate and some will be all-ages events. We hope to see you there or somewhere outside on the occasional sunshiny day as we all begin to emerge from our caves.
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A SMATTERING OF WHAT YOU’LL FIND INSIDE: Trans trailblazer Sasha Buchert..................................................................................................................... page 9 Samantha Swaim rides 545 miles for a cause............................................................................................. page 10 Love and marriage equality: Kelly and Sam’s story................................................................................... page 13 Business profile: As You Like It pleasure shop.............................................................................................. page 13 Invisible queers: We’re here and, yes, we’re queer.................................................................................... page 14 Dancer Isaiah Tillman’s demure off-stage demeanor................................................................................ page 20 Two innovative artists dish on being creative in the Rose City................................................................... page 27 Amy Ray on ‘Lung of Love’ and her Northwest ties..................................................................................... page 24 Jean Fogel Zee: idealist, struggler, dancer.................................................................................................. page 28 Columns: The Comeback Kid; Whiskey & Sympathy; The Lady Chronicles; Rain City; Eat, Drink, and Be Mary; Cultivating Life; and Kathy Belge on Dinah Shore Weekend
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Plus Query a Queer, Astroscopes with Miss Renee, This Month in Queer History, End Up Tales … and more! March 2012 •
NEWS BRIEFS
Family law for all families Mark Johnson Roberts Past president, National LGBT Bar Association; founder/past president, Oregon Gay and Lesbian Law Association; past president, Oregon State Bar
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Many thanks to the 1,000+ people who attended the PQ Launch Party & After-Party, hosted by The Jupiter Hotel, Crush, and Dry Fly Vodka! Brilliant Media LLC would also like to thank PQ Monthly’s charter advertisers. We couldn’t have done it without you! • Adam Roberts, LMT • Anne Seelye, Waddell and Reed • Anthony Gitch, LMT • Art Heads • Bling Dental • Cascade Aids Project • Catherine Cooney, MS, LPC, CSAT • Celia Lyons, Meadows Group • Center for Dermatology and • Laser Surgery • Corrine Lai, Esq. • Cupcake Jones • D. Dustin Posner Architect • Daniel Kasch Handman • David Flynn, LMT • Deborah Samuels, MS, LPC • Denise L. Stern, Attorney at Law • Dignified Pet Services • Donald Falk, Hasson Realtors Company • Dr. David Magilke, Portland Face • Doctor • Dry Fly Vodka • Dwayne Davis, Realty Trust • El Hispanic News • Elliot, Powel, Baden & Baker Insurance • Eric Brown, Waddell & Reed • Fazzolari Custom Homes & Renovations • Fanno Creek Clinic • Gary Boyer, Mortage Monkey • Habitat for Humanity • Hamma Jamma Remodeling • Hawks Gym • Hustad Funeral Home • Kevin Eddy, LMT • Inferno/Hot Flash • Imperial Sovereign Rose Court • Jacolyn C. Wheatley, CPA, LLC • Rainbow Tax Service • James Komero, Rose City Mortgage • James D. McVittie, Legacy • Preservation Law • Jewel Robinson, M Realty • Joel Hamley, Meadows Group • Julie Glaser, MA, LPC • Jupiter Hotel • K9 Dental • Killingsworth Station • Kimberly De Alto, Chirocentric pqmonthly.com
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NEWS BRIEFS NEWS BRIEFS
NEWS BRIEFS
BREVITY ROCKS! NEWS FROM NEAR AND FAR LOCAL
trans issues and terminology, but people of all knowledge levels are welcome.
About 30 people held a candelight vigil under the Morrison Bridge on the eastside March 10 to raise awareness about the plight of Portland’s homeless after two men were shot while the slept in that spot last month, according to the Portland Mercury. The men, Carter Hickman and Albert Dean, both survived, though Hickman is still in the hospital and Dean’s whereabouts are unknown. The Willamette Week reports that the two men, who usually stay at the Right 2 Dream Too shelter, are believed to be a couple. Amy Ruiz, former communications director at City Hall will be promoted to deputy chief of staff to Mayor Sam Adams effective March 19. Replacing her will be former culture and communications policy advisor Caryn Brooks. Brooks’s position will be filled by Tomi Douglas Anderson, the former marketing director Amy Ruiz at Seattle’s Experience Music Project and one-time executive director for the New York Gay Men’s Chorus.
Ernesto Domínguez
About 30 Latino high school students learned about LGBTQ issues March 9 at a seminar on “The Alphabet Soup of Sexual Minority Youth” at Western Oregon University. Speakers included Ariel Cerrud, Ernesto Domínquez, and Ismael Meda. It was one of two-dozen seminars offered as part of the 22nd César Chávez Leadership Conference.
The Queer Students of Color Conference begins at Portland State University on April 13. The conference provides resources, leadership, training, and skill building through workshops that address the unique issues affecting Queer Students of Color and their communities they occupy. Allies are welcome. Registration is $10 and can be completed at sites.google.com/site/qusocc/home. The conference is also looking for performers for its variety hour. Email qsocconference@gmail.com by March 26 if you’re interested. Healthcare providers and community members will come together to discuss LGBTQ health issues March 30 at the Meaningful Care Conference. Workshop topics include primary care for rural Oregonians, social service needs for transgender children and youth, LGBTQ and queer people of color domestic violence survivors, and mental health care for people with HIV/AIDS. Register online at oregonlgbtqhealth.com/mcc. After the Meaningful Care Conference whets yours whistle, learn more about trans health from Dean Spade, April 6 at OHSU. The presentation, intended for health care providers and advocates, will address trans healthcare needs, obstacles, and approaches to addressing those obstacles. Spade is the founder of the Silvia Riveras Law Project and co-author of “Medical Therapy and Health Maintenance for Transgender Men.” The presentation assumes a basic level of awareness about • March 2012
Lewis & Clark has opened a low-cost Community Counseling Center dedicated to serving African American, Spanish-speaking, and LGBTQQI communities who are experiencing mental health, addiction, and relationship issue. Services are provided by counselor and therapist trainees on a sliding scale from $10-$50 per sessions. To schedule an appointment, call 503-768-6320. The Oregon Coalition Against Domestic And Sexual Violence (OCADSV ) has named Vanessa Timmons as its new executive director. She had more than 20 years experience as an advocate and writer and was most recently employed as domestic violence program development specialVanessa Timmons ist for the Multnomah County Domestic Violence Coordination Office. Timmons is also a survivor and the author of “The Way of the Heroine: A Women’s Healing Journal.” La Gra nde Mayor Da niel Pokorney apologized February 20 for the tone of anti-gay remarks he made on Facebook the previous week, according to The Le Grande Observer. The posts, which compared Washing ton State to Sodom a nd Gomorrah and called samesex unions an “abomination,” sparked Eastern Oregon UniverDaniel Pokorney sity students to arrange a forum with the mayor. In addition to apologizing for his “choice of words,” he said that he doesn’t hate anyone. Marriage equality supporters in Washington won a battle to remove the phrase “redefine marriage” from Referendum 74, a ballot measure brought by opponents of same-sex marriage. Opponents have until June 6 to collect 120,577 valid voter signatures to get the referendum on the November ballots. In the meantime, Washington United for Marriage is trying to get an equal (or greater) number of pledges in support of marriage equality. Pledge online at washingtonunitedformarriage.org. Pride NW is hosting its first “annual” spring fundraiser March 29: An Evening with the Portland Mayoral Candidates. While not intended to be a debate or forum, guests will have the opportunity to chat the three of the candidates: Eileen Brady, Charlie Hales, and Jefferson Smith. Tickets are available at pridenw.org. Q Center will host a forum on May 1 called “Meet the Candidates 2012 – The Search for Portland’s Next Mayor.” The “casual and intimate forum is open to all official candidates and will be moderated by Q Center Executive Director Barbara McCullough-Jones. Community members are encouraged to send questions for the candidates to info@pdxqcenter.org with the subject “Candidate Forum.”
NATIONAL Freedom to Work is putting pressure on President Barack Obama to sign an executive order banning anti-LGBTQ employment discrimination at companies that take fed-
eral contracts. According to the organization, 22 percent of all jobs are supported by these contracts. Freedom to Work has created a petition that has been signed by more than 100,000 people. Add your signature at Change.org. The American Bar Association is seeking nominations for its first-ever LGBT awards. The Stonewall Awards will honor lawyers who have successfully championed LGBT legal causes. Nominations are due by May 31 and can be submitted via the ABA’s website, americanbar.org. The ABA Commission on Sexual and Gender Identity will present the awards February 2013 at the ABA Midyear Meeting in Dallas. Outgoing Human Rights Campaign President Joe Solmonese has been tapped by the Obama campaign to serve as one of 35 national cochairs. Others include Senate Assistant Majority Leader Dick Durbin (D-Ill.), Sen. Jeanne Shaheen (D-N.H.), Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa, Chicago Mayor Rahm Emmanuel and actress Eva Longoria. Replacing Solmonese at HRC will be 38-yearJoe Salmonese old Chad Griffin. Griffin, who founded the American Foundation for Equal Rights, is a national communications and political strategist.
WORLD
The governor of St. Petersburg, Russia passed a law in February banning the promotion of LGBTQ identities among minors. Advocates are concerned that the law is an effort to silence the queer community. Violation of the law results in fines for individuals and business. According to PinkNews, at least 100,000 people how vowed to boycott the city in responses to the new law. In preparation for the 2012 London Olympic Games, volunteers are undergoing diversity and inclusion training. As part of that training, volunteers must take a quiz that asks how they would handle situations involving gay couples and individuals whose gender they cannot identify. It also addresses scenarios involving Muslims and people with disabilities. Australian radio presenter Suzanna McGill has come under fire for provider voiceover talent for an anti-gay television ad put out by Bob Katter of Katter’s Australian Party. McGill will be off the air until the matter has been investigated by the station she works for, ABC. Meanwhile, Katter’s gay half-brother Karl has put out an ad of his own, responding the homophobia in Bob’s attack on Liberal National Party leader Campbell Newman. pqmonthly.com
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March 2012 •
• March 2012
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NEWS
SASHA BUCHERT SURPRISED TO LEARN SHE’S A TRANSGENDER TRAILBLAZER Erin Rook PQ Monthly
Sasha Buchert is one lucky lady. Not only does she get paid to do work she is passionate about, she recently broke ground as the first openly transgender person appointed to a state advisory board. She had initially applied for an appointment on the newly created Oregon Health Authority Task Force. Buchert, 45, didn’t make the cut, but her resume stayed on file. When a vacancy opened up on the Oregon State Hospital Advisory Board, she was recommended for the position, and ultimately appointed by Gov. John Kitzhaber. “It was definitely a little bit of a surprise,” she says. “I feel honored, and it’s definitely going to be a challenge.” Buchert, who works as the communications manager for Basic Rights Oregon, says she was unaware of her apparent trailblazing status until a member of the media brought it up. And even then, she found it hard to believe she was the first. “It came to my attention because somebody from Willamette Week contacted me. He asked me if I was the first transgender person [to be appointed]. I told him I didn’t think so. I figured Laura Calvo or somebody would have served on a board at some point,” Buchert says. But a check with the Governor’s office confirmed it. “It’s an honor for sure if that’s true. But it’s kind of sad that in 2012 I’m the first.” The work of the committee — reviewing the laws and regulations that impact safety, patient care, and security at the psychiatric hospital and making recommendations for improvements — sits at the inter-
Sasha Buchert is the first openly transgender person to be appointed to a state advisory board. section of Buchert’s experiences, making it a clear fit. “It dovetails nicely with the advocacy experience I have working at the hospital. I care deeply about mental health and having access to appropriate healthcare,” Buchert says. “It also dovetails pretty nicely with the advocacy work I’ve been doing with Basic Rights Oregon’s trans justice working group, working to remove healthcare exclusions for trans Oregonians.” Buchert graduated from Willamette University’s law school in 2005 and spent a year working as an advocate for OSH patients through the Oregon Advocacy Center. Though not currently practicing law, she sits on BRO’s legal advisory group and has
Photo by Xilia Faye, PQ Monthly
given presentations on the organization’s Know Your Rights Guide. “I think that [law] is something that’s a lifetime career for me. Eventually I’d like to branch off a little bit more and I guess I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it. I am really enjoying the work I’m doing right now with BRO,” Buchert says, adding that she would love to integrate her communications and legal skills into a profession. She clearly has an iron in both those fires. In addition to her work with BRO and the advisory board, Buchert volunteers with Q Center as a liaison between Q Center and Gender Queery, a monthly support group
open to anyone interested in talking about gender-related issues, and is a member of Q Patrol. She also maintains Resources PDX on the center’s website, which provides health and other resources for transgender and gender non-conforming folk sand hosts KBOO’s queer radio show “OUTLOUD.” Through all of these community engagements, she has chosen to be out. But she realizes not everyone can be. “It’s two-pronged issue right? I do feel like there’s a responsibility to be out. I’m proud and I think being transgender is beautiful,” Buchert says. “[But] even in the People’s Republic of Portland, it can be a very hostile situation, especially for children and students. I wouldn’t begrudge anyone for not coming out.” Still, she believes the community needs more leaders like Janet Mock (the People. com editor who recently publicly came out as transgender). Or, one could easily argue, like Buchert. Out LGBTQ people play an important role in changing hearts and minds, she says, by letting people know “we are your family, your neighbors, [and] your friends.” “Doing this work has been extremely empowering for me and it has enabled me to transition a lot faster than I would haven been able to without doing this work,” Buchert says. “The more of this work I do, the more confident and comfortable I have felt about who I am, and proud of who I am. [Seeing] my struggle as part of a larger struggle — it’s a human rights struggle. It helps forge understandings of other struggles.”
GEORGE FOX ALUMS SPEAK OUT AGAINST ANTI-LGBTQ POLICIES By Erin Rook PQ Monthly
A group of LGBT alumni and allies of George Fox University are calling on administrators to re-examine the school’s policies around homosexuality. OneGeorgeFox, the alumni group, published an open letter March 1 calling for greater support for LGBTQ students at the Christian university. The letter specifically calls on George Fox administrators to change the policy on “Sexual Purity,” which makes engaging in sexual activity outside of heterosexual marriage a punishable offense. “Like heterosexual people, most of us have a very basic human need for the emotional intimacy and physical affection that comes from a committed relationship. Consequently, making acceptance of LGBTQ pqmonthly.com
people within the George Fox community contingent on celibacy is not loving or responsible,” the letter, which has been signed by more than 200 alumni, states. “We are not asking for permission to live ‘a promiscuous gay lifestyle.’ We want a spouse. We want a family. We want romance! And we deserve a community that accepts us and will nurture our relationships and our families.” Paul Southwick, a gay 2005 graduate and cofounder of OneGeorgeFox, says that he and two other alums — Travis Shafer and Appeals Court Judge Darleen Ortega — had expressed their concerns to administrators privately, but were spurred to action when a suicidal gay student was referred to them by faculty at the end of last year. “We sensed an urgency that something needed to be done to create a safer place for students,” Southwick says.
The university responded online one week later with a statement affirming its commitment to treating everyone with dignity, apologizing for hurting anyone’s feelings, and reiterating its position that marriage is limited to heterosexual couples. The statement did not address the university’s policies for students or faculty. Because professors could lose their jobs for “supporting homosexuality,” Southwick says, allied faculty members are hesitant to sign the letter and are unable to make themselves known as a safe person for LGBTQ student. In addition to the letter (which has more than 250 signatures), the OneGeorgeFox website features alumni perspectives, news, and resources. But that is just the soft launch. The group’s big coming out party was a March 14 event featuring recently out Christian musician Jennifer Knapp and Gay
Christian Network director Justin Lee. The event came out of an attempt to balance a speaker the university is hosting earlier that day — Christopher Yuan. Yuan is an ex-gay minister who promotes the idea of “holy sexuality” (as opposed to heteroor homo-), which essentially amounts to marriage for straight folks and celibacy for gays. What make him an expert? According to his blog, while Yuan attended dental school, “he began living promiscuously as a homosexual and experimenting with illicit drugs. Within a few years, he was expelled from dental school, imprisoned for drug dealing, and discovered that he was HIV positive.” Yuan talks about how he transformed from “what many would consider their worst nightmare” to living a life of celibacy and singleness. george fox page 18
March 2012 •
NEWS
SAMANTHA SWAIM RIDES 545 MILES FOR A CAUSE
Kristin Steele (left) and Samantha Swaim get some moral support on the trail. Daniel Borgen PQ Monthly
As the architect behind some of the city’s most successful fundraisers, you probably recognize her name. If you’ve had the pleasure of attending one of her perfectly executed events, you’ve surely seen her face. Through all that organizing and orchestrating, she mingles with guests, serving as any given function’s consummate host. While providing vital services that keep many of our city’s and state’s important non-profits up and running, Samantha Swaim and her partner, Kristin Steele — they also happen to be college sweethearts — are cycling activists, leading the Portland contingent of California-based AIDS LifeCycle this June. First, a little background: LifeCycle — which raises money for HIV/AIDS services and awareness — is a grueling seven-day journey that takes riders from San Francisco to Los Angeles, a 545mile trek. Yes, 545 miles — not your typical jaunt from the eastside to your favorite downtown coffeehouse. And, up until last year, Samantha had never even been on a bike. “For three years, one of my dear friends inspired me with his journey to train, ride, and raise funds for AIDS LifeCycle,” she explains. “Every year I would watch from the sidelines as he did this incredibly inspirational thing and became part of this beautiful community that raised massive amounts of money and awareness around an issue I think has become far too quiet.” Cycling in general is no breezy task, let alone embarking on a hundreds-mile trek. Samantha determined to channel her inspiration into participation. “I was not an athlete, was obese, and couldn’t imagine doing much more than donating,” she recalls. “But as the ninth ride kicked off, I decided it was time to change that and I registered to participate in the next ride, and Kristin jumped on board to do it with me. I spent a year losing 70 pounds, getting comfortable on a bike, and peddling lots of miles with an amazing team of other riders. Every day was a challenge, but at the end of each challenge I felt like I was part of something much bigger 10 • March 2012
than myself. I was on top of the world.” And, for Samantha and Kristin, the personal connection only grows. “For every mile I ride, I receive another story from a friend who comes out as positive, who shares their loss of so many that they loved,” Samantha says. “So it is to these people that I ride in tribute. Kristin and I ride with the names of those we love who are positive or who have been lost to this disease. It inspires us to do more.” Of course, these sorts of long-distance rides don’t happen without an incredible amount of effort — training, preparation, practice runs. Presently, Samantha rides once a week with her current team. Each Sunday, they embark on 4050 mile rides. As the big event approaches, those practice rides get longer, ending with a century ride up the side of Mt. Hood. “By then, we’re ready for anything,” she says. Let’s face it — most of us can’t fathom the idea of such an intense physical challenge. We can imagine what it might be like, boast an intellectual, fact-based understanding, but there’s nothing like first-hand experience. “Every day begins early,” Samantha explains. “Typically we wake up around 4 a.m. to get dressed, have a large breakfast, and pack up our gear. We are on our bikes and heading out by 6:30. There is this incredible infrastructure of volunteers — Roadies — who mark the course, direct traffic, feed you, support repairs, and service every possible need you might have. It becomes a moving city with rest stops every 20 miles, a lunch stop, and a campground at the end of each night. Every day you ride, you eat amazing food, you drink lots of Powerade and water, and you climb mountains. Big mountains!” And on this hundreds-mile ride, attacked in 60100 miles increments, there are over 2,500 participants, boasting people from all walks of life. “Every rider has been trained in the same rules of the road and it’s a beautiful sense of community,” Samantha says. “If you ever need something, a gaggle of other riders helps repair, refuel, or support you. Every hill climb has a crew of volunteers cheering you up. Community members come from every small California town to serve us cookies, ring cowbells, pass out fresh straw-
berries or licorice. There are drag queens everywhere — on bikes, at rest stops, on the entertainment stages at night. It is a big gay parade.” There’s even a Red Dress tie-in. On the fifth day of the ride, everyone dons their red best. “The costumes are amazing,” Samantha recalls. “The visual of 2,500 riders climbing the hills of Central California in red dresses makes a giant red ribbon around the hillsides.” Throughout the ride, emotions run the gamut. “Each day, people are singing, laughing, crying,” she says. “Lots of crying. Crying in celebration, crying for those we’ve lost, crying for those who are climbing hills proudly wearing their PosPeds jerseys. It’s a giant celebration..” In many ways, aside from the big money raised, it’s all about awareness — which begins with training and continues throughout the ride, every year. Samantha recounts one specific instance: “You know, 2,500 riders coming through a small town in the ranch country of California can be a big awareness piece. In the small town of Bradley — with a population of 120 — we cross the bridge into this small main street with eight buildings and a little mission church and we see kids waving flags. ... Every pillar of the bridge, every fence post, every car, every signpost is wrapped in red ribbons. The schoolchildren have made t-shirts, buttons, and postcards that they’re selling with amazing inspirational messages about riding on, being strong, and changing the world. “The same school kids greet us as we get off our bikes and they serve us burgers,” she recalls. “They move through the crowd talking to the riders, taking pictures with them, and asking each rider why they ride,” she recalls. They received letters in camp from the children that evening, each one different, thanking the riders and calling them heroes. “At dinner that night, the speaker read a letter from a teacher in Bradley,” Samantha continues. “That teacher said, ‘Because of you, no kid in Bradley will grow up to be homophobic. No kid in Bradley will grow up unaware of AIDS. No child in our community will be afraid to come out. And for that Bradley is grateful.’” But it isn’t just in California and during the ride that participants raise awareness. Throughout training, Portlanders ride all over the Gorge, wine country, farm country, and through the city. Riders wear their LifeCycle gear and have the opportunity to talk about what it is and why they ride. Onlookers and questioners offer thanks, share stories, and talk about personal journeys about either being positive or losing loved ones. “This disease affects so many,” Samantha says. “When we ride, we open that door for people to connect, talk, to get engaged. It’s powerful. We’ve recruited new riders that way, we’ve raised money in the most unexpected places, and we’ve shared in a million amazing stories. If you haven’t signed up yet …it’s a great ride, a great event, and training has just begun. So it might be time to start pedaling.” For more information about AIDS LifeCycle, visit www.aidslifecycle.org. To donate to Portland’s team, click the “Donate” button and search for Samantha Swain’s name. This year, Cascade AIDS Project is joining the Seattle to Portland ride and hosting RIDE4CAP. Read about that here: http://cascadeaids.org/events/ride-4-cap.
THIS MONTH IN QUEER HISTORY MARCH 1649 – Sarah White Norman is the first known woman to be convicted for lesbian behavior in North America. Her partner in the crime of “lewd behaviour each with other upon a bed,” is not prosecuted on account of being under 16. [“Same-sex desire in the English Renaissance: a sourcebook of texts,” via Wikipedia] 1656 – New Haven Colony becomes the only English colony to make sex between women punishable by death. [Gay and Lesbian Archives of the Pacific NW] 1842 – Florida passes a law mandating execution for those convicted of sodomy. [GLAPN] 1895 – The Marquess of Queensberry is arrested on charges of criminal libel for calling Oscar Wilde a sodomite. The tables are eventually turned, and Wilde is convicted of “gross indecency.” [queerhistory. blogspot.com] 1969 – Jim Morrison (The Doors) is arrested for allegedly mimicking fellatio and exposing himself on stage. [queerhistory.blogspot.com] 1975 – The U.S. District Court in Pennsylvania rules against spying on individuals in public restrooms without a warrant. [GLAPN] 1991 – Montana law bans using a person’s HIV-status to initiate a sodomy case. [GLAPN] 1996 – The California Supreme Court rules that gay men who are selectively prosecuted for solicitation have a right to challenge that prosecution. [queerhistory.blogspot.com] 2004 – Oregon’s attorney general issues an opinion stating that issuing marriage licenses to samesex couples violates state law, while anticipating that the Oregon State Supreme Court would rule against those statutes. [about.com] 2008 – Homosexuality is legalized in Panama and in Nicaragua (for the second time). [queerhistory.blogspot.com] 2009 – Denmark legalizes adoption by same-sex couples. [queerhistory.blogspot.com] 2009 – Argentina and The Phillipines end their bans on gays and lesbians in the military. [queerhistory.blogspot.com] 2010 – Marriage equality takes effect in Mexico City. [queerhistory. blogspot.com] 2010 – Congress passes a law making same-sex marriage legal in the District of Columbia. [infoplease.com] pqmonthly.com
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FEATURES
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FEATURES
LOVE AND MARRIAGE EQUALITY: KELLY AND SAM By Daniel Borgen PQ Monthly
As same-sex marriage inches toward reality in Washington State, we’ll be checking in with couples in Clark County to tell their stories. This is the first installment. It’s hard to imagine any city without its downtown, but that rule seems especially true across the river in Vancouver. Without its essential, bustling hub of artists, entrepreneurs, musicians, bartenders, and baristas, Clark County might be absorbed by the miles of sprawl surrounding it. Indeed, Vancouver boasts a diverse, loyal — and growing — downtown community. Two of the community’s integral cogs, artists Kelly Keigwin and Sam MacKenzie, who met at an art gallery, embody the spirit and vibe of downtown’s burgeoning scene. They also want to get married. Sam, a Vancouver native, dove into the local art scene when she joined MOSAIC Arts Alliance, a non-profit arts collective, back in 2003. She’d eventually go on to serve on MOSIAC’s board of directors and then as president. In those positions, she organized art shows and events at Sixth Street. Presently, Sam is on a break from gallery work, focusing instead on making and selling crafts throughout Portland and Vancouver. Kelly moved to Vancouver from Southern California in 1996. Her first installation, a mixed-media research presentation about the Hanford Nuclear Reservation, was at North Bank Artists’ Gallery. Later she earned “best in show” for her installation “Stephanie and Sophia,” which addressed the subject of marriage equality during the dark years of the Bush administration. Kelly has shown her work at Angst, North Bank, Sixth Street Gallery, and Gallery 360 in Vancouver — in addition to runs in Portland, Seattle,
Sam MacKenzie (left) and Kelly Keigwin want to get married — for love and for practical reasons. and New York. Both Kelly and Sam currently teach courses at OCAC — and collaborate together. “We met when I stopped by Angst Gallery to discuss my upcoming show,” Kelly says. “Sam happened to be at the gallery. We saw each other again at the show and our friendship grew over the next couple of months. We saw each other at various local events and went out on Worldwide Pinhole Photography Day, shooting photos together. Eventually we ended up going on our first date — dinner at a food cart and watching ‘The Fantastic Mr. Fox’ at the Laurelhurst Theater. By the end of the night we were holding hands and I knew I had found the person I had been waiting for.” For both Sam and Kelly, the issue of marriage equality isn’t only about showing and demonstrating love. “When Measure 36 was up for vote in Oregon, there was this horrible commercial
Photo by Shelley Pearson
that featured a gay couple speaking against gay marriage,” Sam recalls. “The basic point of the commercial was that they had been able to hire a lawyer to draw up all the legal documents they needed, so gay marriage was unnecessary.” Contracts, Sam continues, can be voided by state legislation, and, additionally, many LGBTQ folks simply can’t afford the costs associated with acquiring and maintaining legal counsel. “Love is great and getting married as a societal symbol of a couple’s love and commitment is great, but the reality is that marriage is about more than love,” Sam says. “I think focusing on love almost makes it less urgent. The rights that come with a marriage are more than just symbolic ideals about societal approval. There are tax breaks, the right to not testify against each other in court, spousal benefits, hospital visitation, and so on and so on.”
The couples’ two-pronged approach to love and practicality admittedly stems from a terrifying ordeal they faced last summer when Kelly has hit by a drunk driver and her car was totaled. “I still feel sick when I think about what would have happened if she had been injured worse and taken to the hospital unconscious,” Sam says. “How long until I would have found out? Would I have been able to see her?” Facing very real what-ifs, their perspective grew. “It is about the benefits that come with being married and the reality that many couples, like us, can’t afford a lawyer to ensure we will be covered legally,” Kelly points out. “Even if we do retain the right to marry in Washington, we’re not fully protected throughout the country, not until marriage equality becomes federally recognized. We deserve to be equally recognized and I am hopeful that the majority of people in this country will open their hearts and minds and see we do not pose a risk to them or their families. We are a family. We are the same as everyone else that wants and deserves the right to be married.” Like so many queers, Kelly and Sam grew up watching people they love — family members, friends — be part of an institution that has always excluded them. “When I was a young queer, gay couples were starting to have commitment ceremonies,” Sam explains. “While I appreciate these symbolic gestures and am happy for those who want to have them, I am more practical than sentimental. I decided a long time ago that if I was going to get married, it would only be when it was legal.” Stay with PQMonthly.com for more with Sam and Kelly — and other couples as we profile them. We’ll also stay abreast of developments in Washington State.
PLEASURE SHOP PEDDLES GENDER-INCLUSIVE, ECO-FRIENDLY PRODUCTS By Erin Rook PQ Monthly
Two of Portland’s greatest claims to fame — its sex positivity and fondness for all things green — come together in its newest “pleasure shop,” As You Like It. The company, which launched online in January and has plans for a brick-and-mortar store in the coming year, is the brainchild of local queer activist Kim Marks. “We take our name Kim Marks literally,” Marks says. “We’re tr ying to create a space where people can get their sexual needs met on their terms, instead of on the terms of an industry that has largely ignored the pqmonthly.com
health side of their products.” That means AYLI is committed to only selling products that are toxin-free, environmentally friendly, and supportive of a wide range of sexualities and gender identities. Marks’ concern with the ingredients in sex toys and sensuality products is both personal and political. As a cancer survivor with 17 years of experience as an environmental and social justice activist, including a nearly 5-year stint on the board of the Civil Liberties Defense Center, Marks is acutely aware of the impact common toxins have on the planet and on people. “I have always been careful about what I put into my system. I also knew to watch out for phthalates in my sex toys and toxic ingredients in the body care products I used. Cancer is on the rise. Almost everyone I know knows at least one person who has been impacted by cancer in some way,” says Marks, 36, who was diagnosed with
thyroid cancer in 2003. “As an environmental activist, I was more worried about what these products did to our fresh water ecosystems than to my own body.” But Marks knows that, despite their better intentions, many people don’t have the time and resources to determine whether their sex toys are safe for their bodies and environment. “We’re committed to doing the dirty work for our customers,” Marks says. “We research all the toys, lubricants, and other products that we carry to make sure that we don’t stock any that have toxic materials or chemicals. We also prioritize local products so that we minimize our carbon footprint by not shipping things from all over the world.” Among the toxins AYLI avoids are phthalates (used in jelly toys), petrochemicals (including mineral oil), and synthetic fragrances (often labeled simply “fragrance”
despite containing up to 200 unnamed ingredients). “We’re also focused on being completely gender inclusive, and not just to cis women and men. We’re going to be one of the first shops to carry products for both trans women and men,” Marks says. “We also are trying to eliminate the gender essentialist language from our copy on the website and won’t tolerate any of it in our eventual brick-and-mortar [store]. People shouldn’t feel like they’re buying ‘the wrong toy’ just because their body isn’t what the manufacturers had in mind when they created the product.” Marks is assisted in this endeavor by AYLI media manager Adisson Simon, a former photo curator for Genderfork and sole moderator of TransQueersXXX, a submissionbased porn blog focused on inclusive trans sexuality. as you like it page 26
March 2012 • 13
FEATURES
WE’RE HERE AND, YES, WE’RE QUEER
Beth Mattson (left) and Chris Weyl have to remind people that though they may be a heterosexual couple with a baby, they’re still queer. By Erin Rook
is a touch sensitive, and the boy child sometimes wears pink. But this is Portland.
PQ Monthly
If a queer stands on a crowded bus and nobody sees them, are they still there? It may seem a silly question, but for LGBTQ folks whose queerness is less visible, it reflects a legitimate concern. There are many factors that contribute to queer invisibility in the LGBTQ community as well as the world at large — gender presentation and roles, the gender of one’s partner(s), and public (un)awareness are but a few. Coming out may be a universal experience for LGBTQ folks, but some find they have to do it more often than others. Even the keenest gaydar is not always enough to alert “family” to the fact that they belong. As a result, they find creative ways to say, “I am here.” Beth Mattson, 31, and Chris Weyl, 35, get it. From the outside, they look like any other hetero family. Sure, mom has short hair, dad
Married but not mainstream That both Mattson and Weyl are queer is something that often gets overlooked. In fact, before meeting each other, both were almost exclusively gay. So this newfound invisibility means coming out again. And again. And again. “It’s a couple levels of coming out,” Weyl says. “Not only do you have to perhaps introduce your friends to the concept of dating someone of the opposite biological organs, but you have to figure out how to establish to straight people that you’re not necessarily straight. I’ve had to be lot more obvious about this.” To illustrate, Weyl pulls out his messenger bag, which has a wide rainbow running down the middle. It’s an intentional signal, and one that has come in handy recently. “PLOP [Parenting Lesbians of Portland]
Cameron Kude doesn’t always feel seen as a bisexual. had no idea what to do with us,” Weyl says. Apparently not sure if they were dealing with a lost straight couple, the organizer asked, — “thoughtfully, nicely,” Mattson points out — “Why are you here?” They were there because Portland has no queer parenting group that isn’t divided by gender. It was either PLOP or Daddies and Papas. Either way, they were bound to raise a few eyebrows. As they were leaving, Weyl says he realized he forgot his bag and went back in for it. One of the organizers asked him to describe it and he said, “It’s the gayest bag ever.” Just as she was about to be offended, Weyl grabbed his bag and finally saw the look of recognition in her eyes. “You’d think a shared vocabulary would get it going,” Mattson says. “I can make as many Amy Ray jokes as I want to, but I still have to come out as queer. Coming out is a lifelong process. It’s just a lengthier sentence know.”
Silencing assumptions Heidi Seekins, 32, can relate. Like Mattson and Weyl, she and her husband Andrew Wiley are queer. Seekins also identifies as genderqueer, while Wiley considers himself bisexual (“for lack of a better word”). “I definitely feel like my queerness has been more invisible since I got into a ‘heterosexual’ relationship and especially since I got married,” Seekins says. “I think that many people assume that, a) you are the gender that you appear to be, and b) if you’re in a hetero relationship, then you are straight.” Now that she’s married to a man, she says it’s harder to casually mention a female ex than it was, say, in her days as a student at Smith College. “For some reason now, it’s difficult for me to say ‘my ex-girlfriend’ without it seeming like this big heavy thing I’m dropping,” Seekins says. Strangers often feel justified in making unseen page 26
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GETTING OUT, GOING BACK By Andrew Edwards PQ Monthly
I cram the last box labeled “Books/Miscellaneous” into my mother’s navy blue minivan and heave the sliding door shut. As we take to the road and leave Portland, rain slicks across the windshield. Eleven hours later, atop the Bay Bridge, I roll down the passenger-side window. The San Francisco Bay yawns below us, and the saltwater air carries with it goose bumps, and the mordant smell of freeway. Roaming the flesh-laden sidewalks of Folsom Street Fair in a borrowed harness and cutoffs is a confusing kick-off to my new life. A few of my close friends roadtripped down for the festivities, among them the six-foot-three drink of water with curly hair and a Virginia drawl I met not a month before leaving Portland. “This is your life now!” Adam muses, his voice barely audible over the electro music thumping from a nearby loudspeaker. “Maybe,” I shout back, “but I didn’t move to San Francisco for leather and sidewalk sex!” “Then why the hell did you?” he only half jokes. But his question gives me pause. As debauchery splashes onto my shoes, a dubious voice in my head asks: Is this what I signed up for? My friends return home and my focus shifts to finding a place to live. I shack up with an ex-boyfriend who’s generous enough to let me stay in the interim. We play nice for a while, but old wounds haven’t yet healed. It may have been naïve to imagine the scenario working out, but I had to touch the stove to see if it was hot. After a month, I land a flat in the Mission district; I pack up my things, bandage my burned finger, and look forward to normalcy. What comes instead is a full-fledged long distance relationship (the irony is not lost on me). Every day sees Adam’s increasing
presence on my mind and my phone bill. Flights between our two cities are now a monthly expense; I think I love him. With each video chat, the disquieting whisper inside my head grows more difficult to tune out: Why am I here? My stomach is unsettled; a phone call home will cure what ails me. My mom’s voice over the phone is medicinal. I tell her about my nagging uncertainty, and I expect a quick fix. Instead, I hear an echo: “Well, why are you?” My mind travels back two years. I’m waiting tables and drinking too much in Portland, while my journalism degree sits in a drawer collecting dust. I feel fantastically uninspired. Shirking responsibility, I blame my chagrin on my environment. Portland is too soggy, too tedious. I call upon rudimentary logic to illuminate a solution, and a light bulb flickers: If I leave Portland, then I’ll be cured of my boredom and general sense of uselessness. A brighter flicker: If I move to San Francisco, then I’ll find the inspiration to be creative. Now a steady glow: If I’m creative, then I’ll get published. If I get published, then I’ll be happy with myself as a contributing member of society. According to logic, if I change my station, then my problems will be solved. But I’m still waiting tables, still drinking too much. And as much as I admire the handsome faces on Castro, savor the dim sum in Chinatown, seize the winter afternoons spent sunbathing in Dolores Park, I feel fundamentally the same. Because, at least where making life-altering decisions was concerned, my rudimentary logic assigned too much value to the predicate — whether to relocate or stay put — in determining the consequent — finding contentment. It left no room for variables — tall men with southern accents, for example — and allowed no possibility of alternate outcomes. An expensive epiphany, but a valuable one. Station, then, is inconsequential; at best it’s an opportunity, at worst, a surmountable affliction. “Where I was born and where and how I have lived is unimportant,” said Georgia O’Keeffe. “It is what I have done with where I have been that should be of interest.” Another light bulb — “If I return to Portland…” — flickers on, and illuminates an inestimable array of possibilities. I’m biking through Golden Gate Park on a summer day in early March, one of the last like it I’ll spend before moving back. Behind me lies the city, before me the ocean. I feel goose bumps, and am reminded of driving over the Bay Bridge those months ago. There it is again, the saltwater air — this time accompanied by the scent of things blooming.
By the time you read this, Andrew will once again be a Rose City resident. If you have questions or opinions, then you should email him at andrew@pqmonthly.com. 16 • March 2012
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PERSPECTIVES
VOTING WITH OUR DOLLARS Two perspectives on socially responsible spending decisions By Nick Mattos PQ Monthly
Organized efforts to “vote with the dollar” have been part of the queer community’s sensibility for at least as long as the Stonewall riots. However, these wellintentioned efforts sometimes don’t yield the intended result of proving our community’s economic and social power. One historical example is the gay community’s boycott of Coors beer back in the 1970’s, an effort initially promoted by Harvey Milk to garner support from labor unions that were already pushing a Coors boycott and were previously not supportive of the battle for equal rights. The outcome of this boycott resulted in both labor unions and Coors themselves taking big strides to support the community — a positive outcome for all involved, despite the action originating from a coalition with groups that initially weren’t particularly focused on the rights of queer people. Another more recent example is the boycott of Target, which many activists called for after the superstore donated $150,000 to support an anti-gay Republican politician. While Target did increase their sponsorship of Pride celebrations in response to the controversy, the boycott did nothing in regards to hurting the organization’s bottom line; Reuters reports that during the boycott Target’s profit actually went up from $522 million to $671 million, putting into question the efficacy of the action. When considering spending, many questions emerge: How can queer people make spending decisions that are truly socially responsible? Where can the community get the best information on what organizations to support or oppose to further their political intent? Most importantly, does the queer community have a higher degree of responsibility to “vote with their dollars” than other communities? As part of this ongoing conversation, two community members offer their (sometimes controversial) perspectives on how and why members of the queer community can be socially responsible with their spending. However, this conversation is far from over — and needs you to contribute your thoughts and your voice. Please make your opinions heard at www.pqmonthly.com.
Rebekah Katherine Brewis
— Editor, TransLiberalPrism.com
I make socially responsible decisions, when it comes to my spending and finances, based on complex political, moral, ethical, philosophical, and economic factors. Those factors are predicated on being a liberal with Buddhist/Indian philosophical beliefs, being a transgender female, and living in a politically solidifying queer community. pqmonthly.com
Rebekah Katherine Brewis (left) and Marc Delphine Having historically been under economic and political assault by right wing politics and acts of oppression, it is my goal to counteract such harmful processes through education and selective shopping. I do vote with my dollar, as an informed queer community consumer. Smaller businesses have the added capability of being socially innovative, to meet the tailored needs of any given population. It’s important to foster a personal, culturally sensitive, and competent service to customers, and small businesses have the ability to do so. When we mean small business, it means customer centered, not company centered. To me, that is the difference between fostering and curtailing human rights. When that business is queerowned or friendly, their business practices are more likely to be aligned to my beliefs, so I know I am making financial decisions based on integrity within myself, as well as for the integrity of the queer community at large. In my beliefs and practices, “No man is an island, unto himself,” and I extend my awareness to those whom I distantly rely on, through my actions and efforts. In this way, I am not wasting the positive energy and good karma of supporting our queer community, for the ultimate sake of establishing greater equality. In this way, I am part of the community, and the community is part of me. To make random purchases, and to be ignorant of their origins, is tantamount to selling my vote for convenience. One who bases their life merely on convenience alone, is not living a life of integrity and value, but of shallowness and impulse, resulting in loss of potential influence to improve the quality of life for others in the community. Being well aware of the impact my spending habits and patronage has on the queer community and culture, I also rely
frequently on Portland’s LGBTQ Community Yellow Pages, PDXGYP, which is a business directory published by the Portland Area Business Association (PABA). I am interested in investing in a business that invests in me as a person. Small businesses are more able to respond to a changing consumer demand than corporations can or do, historically. I feel that we, as queer persons, most definitely have a social responsibility to reinvest in our community. It is a thousand streams that make a mighty river, not a few dozen. To direct a movement as efficiently as needed to create change, there is no better way than to unite our economic power to create a more concentrated political force, than through the power of both boycotting, as well as the power of brand loyalty.
Marc Delphine — Financial Advisor, Complete Financial Group
Milton Friedman once said, “The social responsibility of a business is to make a profit,” but it is my social responsibility to determine which businesses I wish to see profitable. Based on the hiring practices, the worthy product(s) and/or service(s) it offers, and the vision of its management, I spend my money with businesses where I want to see growth occur.[with the intent of] providing opportunity for growth and development for my team, and I am building an investment that focuses on gay-friendly companies with the vision of “humane capitalism.” When all considerations are equal, I will purchase goods and services from companies that are either gay-owned and/or friendly. Those purposes and causes that I want to advance are where I choose place my money. I believe in buying local because the dollar circulates more in a local economy and that means a direct benefit to me and
the people I’m around. I cannot think globally unless I act locally because if my immediate needs and environment are unmet and unsafe, how can I do anything to better the world I cannot directly affect? So I buy local when I can. I also do my best to support gay-owned businesses through my patronage and investment dollars. If the gay-owned business is local, see Rule #1; if the business is either gayowned, or in the case of publicly-traded companies, I follow the Human Rights Campaign (HRC) “Buying for Equality Guide.” This guide is based on criteria established by HRC each year and suggests that if all things were basically equal, purchase from those companies that practice equality. Each year, more and more companies reach a perfect score (100) on the list. This is promising because I’ve often made purchase decisions from the Buying for Equality list that may have been more expensive in order to support the community. If I can both support and save money ... win-win! [As to whether queer people need to be more socially responsible with their spending decisions than others need to be, the answer is] no. “Need to be” implies that someone “ought to” and who determines who “needs to be” or “ought to” but someone aside from the individual? I am first an individual and I think for myself. I don’t think as a “group” or a “collective” and I certainly don’t think for “society.” People who identify as queer (and I’m not too comfortable with that term) are still individuals. What values the individual supports will be reflected in the masses of buying decisions made. If those in the queer community are interested in the same buying habits that I have — such as supporting local, gay-owned/friendly businesses and investing in gay-friendly public corporations — then being more educated on what is, in fact “gay-friendly” might be the objective. That definition is up to the individual, but I suggest that more people who have never run a business for themselves begin to understand the difficulties of the business world. Most businesses fail and Oregon is no exception. What, with all the red-tape, regulations, and rigmarole, Oregon could be a good example [as to] why businesses fail. But government aside, people need more business acumen and serving a loyal customer base must be a priority if we are to grow. By recognizing that not only is it very difficult to run a business as it is, the challenges (even today, still) of being gay and running a business may be greater than that of the hetero-community. But who knows, really? I think when your back is against the wall that you, the individual will find a method of survival. It should then be no mystery why gay-owned/friendly businesses often are more profitable than their peers. March 2012 • 17
PERSPECTIVES
WHISKEY & SYMPATHY
george fox Continued from page
Dear Sophia and Gula:
My boyfriend and I have been together for almost a year. A couple of months ago, we moved in together. Since, my boyfriend has broached the subject of “opening” our relationship. Our sex life has been great so far — or so I thought — but he’s pretty insistent we give it a try. I’m not so sure. It feels like I’d be giving up my “happy ever after.” What should I do? Take one for the team or stand my ground?
—Nervous in Northwest
Sophia St. James
Dear Nervous in Northwest:
I can understand your fear. It’s difficult to give up on that dream of having the perfect family with the perfect relationship. It’s even more difficult to share the one you love with someone else. My first question to you is: have you asked your boyfriend why he wants to open the relationship? Ask about his previous history with open relationships and how being open either added or took away from them. Find out what he hopes to gain. Discover if he’s missing something or just wants to add a little spice to the mix. It is really important to have good communication about things like this, especially before bringing anyone else into the relationship. I would also suggest asking yourself some important questions. In any situation, I always take a look at the worst possible scenario that could happen. Most likely that scenario never happens, but if you prepare yourself for the worst you can handle most issues that may arise. It also doesn’t help that there are so many myths floating around about open relationships. One of these myths: your intimate relationship isn’t strong, hence a desire to include others. Another is the presence of commitment issues. The assumption underlying these myths is that true intimacy can only be achieved between two people practicing monogamy. Though many people enjoy long-lasting, monogamous relationships, there are just as many who enjoy long-lasting open relationships as well. The most important thing is to decide what is best for you and to be completely honest with yourself and your partner. If you do decide that you want to give it a try, both of you should understand that having an open relationship is going to take work. The pieces won’t fall into place right away. It may get rocky at times. This is where communication and honesty come into play. Some couples have “arrangements.” These are the basic “dos” and “don’ts” of the open relationship. If this is something that you feel would help you and your boyfriend keep boundaries, be reasonable in your requests. Lastly, having an open relationship can be fun. It is an experience full of possibilities and sexual adventures. Maybe you have always wanted to do some naughty kink or role-playing and your boyfriend was never up for that. Now, you have the ability to find that kinky little sub person who will submit to your cane. Either way, the best thing to do is to be honest with your feelings and your boyfriend. Best of luck! —Sophia St. James
Gula Delgatto
Dear NINny:
Thanks for being the one to pop my column cherry! I’m so excited to get in bed with you, your boyfriend, and your problem. Speaking of your problem — boo hoo! Listen to you. You have a live-in boyfriend who wants to add MORE sex up in your lives. Save some for the rest of us. If that ain’t First World troubles, I don’t know what is. I think, though, this topic might open a can of sexy, writhing, hermaphroditic worms. From the suburban gay to the Radical Fairie, the gay community has strong opinions about monogamy and nonmonogamy. Give me your hand — let’s break down your letter: You and your boif moved in together after only six-ish months. Has being in a relationship for under a year been enough to establish a strong foundation to build upon? Do you communicate well? Do you poop in front of each other? You or your man must be quick movers or very young — older queens know not to shack up so early. When you talk about your sex life you sound satisfied. Are you really? Never rely on great or you will find a big-lipped drag queen throwing down in bed with ya’ll to inject a little spice. If he is so insistent he could have someone already in mind for the third — or he has a hotter libido than you! The answer to this is a serious chat. I want you to ask yourself: “What is my happily ever after?” Does this mean you’re not happy with the idea of opening the relationship? Standing your ground implies you don’t want to do it. Taking one for the ream implies negativity about openness as well. If you stop and read your letter, I think you’ve given yourself some answers. To me, it sounds too soon, although you don’t get jaded until you make huge mistakes! I am single and I find my life easier to sleep with who I want, when I want. When it comes to a relationship, I personally can keep “it” in my pants and pantyhose. I am a bit old-fashioned and somewhat of a romantic. I realize that in a relationship there are two people with self-esteems and old romance war wounds can be easily opened. Some couples I know have thirds and they seem to have it worked out. They go through boys like they’re cum rags. I think it’s the communication that gets them through. If you decide to invite a third to share your bed you might find a fourth is even more fun, so be sure to give me a call. —Gula Delgatto
Need some advice from Sophia and Gula? Send your query — with “Queen and Saint” in the subject line — to info@pqmonthly.com. Sophia St. James has been an erotic entertainer since 1996. She has traveled performing and educating the public on self confidence, self worth, and the art of sensuality no matter their outer appearance. Working as a sex and sensuality educator, sex toy/product reviewer, adult film director/producer, model, and erotic visual performer, Sophia is a well rounded woman with drive and determination. Sophia is also a mother and healthcare professional who takes pride in being a body positive and sex positive fierce femme. 18 • March 2012
Gula Delgatto’s life began in a small rural farming town in Romaina. She was scouted singing in a rocky field picking potatoes by a producer of a “Mickey Mouse Club” type ensemble. While touring the Americas the group fell apart due to jealousies and drugs. She later transitioned from Vaudeville to starring on the big screen to woman’s prison, and eventually advised the Dali Lama on fashion n-stuff. Currently she’s taking her life knowledge and giving back in an advice column for PQ.
When Southwick learned Yuan was coming to campus, he asked administrators if they would be open to hosting a gay-affirming speaker to balance the perspectives. Administrators declined, going so far as to tell OneGeorgeFox it couldn’t rent a room on campus for that purpose. It’s not surprising, given the policies in the Student Handbook. Not only is homosexual activity forbidden, knowing about a violation and not taking the required measures is itself a violation. Therefore, no gayaffirming speakers are allowed at this time, Southwick says. Administrators have tentatively agreed to a panel with diverse perspectives on homosexuality in the fall. So instead of bringing Knapp and Lee to campus, OneGeorgeFox hosted its event March 14 — the same day Yuan came to campus — at the Chehalem Cultural Center. The event was put on in collaboration with the nascent LGBTQ student group, Common Ground. “Common Ground is proud to be part of this vibrant community at George Fox University,” the group said March 1 on its newlycreated Facebook page. “We exist to support and serve the LGBTQ students on campus, and to create safe spaces for dialogue to be had. All of us have a strong passion for social justice and we look forward to being a part of positive change in the institution.” The student group is not currently an official campus group. According to Southwick, in order for the group to exist under the current guideline, it would have to be a “support group,” and could not be construed as “advocating” samesex relationships. Ideally, Southwick would like to see the university allow a student group to form member could be safe, talk about faith, affirm their identities, and develop a healthy sexual ethic. He’d also like faculty to able to openly and publicly support students without fear of losing their jobs, for the university to allow speakers with a wide range of perspectives, and for the counseling center to adopt the guidelines of the American Psychological Association and stop referring students to the “reparative therapy” program at Portland’s Northwest Fellowship. “It’s not that we want stamp of approval for promiscuous gay sex,” Southwick says. “We want students to know they can have relationships and families and still be a Christian and still be a person of faith.” To learn more about OneGeorgeFox, visit onegeorgefox.org. pqmonthly.com
GUEST OPINION: A plea for Pride
As a community-led 501c3 nonprofit organization, Pride Northwest prioritizes transparency and accessibility-in all the ways that can be defined. We need and value the community’s input, feedback, and support. That last piece — support — is something that we haven’t been very good at asking for. Although Pride Northwest has several programs and community Debra Porta support priorities, it is the annual Portland Pride Festival and Parade for which we are most well-known. That is what I want to talk about here. In contrast to comparable Pride celebrations, corporate sponsorship only makes up about 20 percent of our revenue. In recent years, the Portland Pride celebration has become significantly more expensive (over $200,000), at the same time that gate donations and beverage sales have declined. To be clear, that is NOT because there are fewer people attending the festival and parade. Despite the impact of weather, attendance and participation continue to climb. Last year’s parade was over three hours long and Portland Police estimate 25,000 people on the streets cheered it on. The lines to get into the festival grow more and more each year. Portland’s Pride Festival has been a worldclass, large-scale Pride event for some time, and will only become more so. Community expectations continue to grow, and we deserve a celebration worthy of us. Pride Northwest is deeply committed to ensuring that Pride continues to be accessible to everyone, regardless of ability to pay. Though counter to our organizational culture and community vision, we have looked at a mandatory gate fee. The problem — aside from excluding community members — is that a mandatory gate fee will TRIPLE the fees and charges that we pay for the use of Waterfront Park. City ordinances and park policies govern these things. For us, a mandatory entry fee is a lose-lose proposition. So, what to do? How do we increase organizational revenue in order to keep the festival accessible for all, and happening at all? We are decreasing costs wherever possible, while maintaining the quality of the celebration. Internally, we have built a brand new website and streamlined processes —things that might typically have cost us in excess of $10,000. We are building fantastic partnerships with fellow organizations to bring value to Portland’s Pride celebration with little to no additional cost, at the Waterfront and around the city. We have added avenues for revenue to the Pride Guide and our website, as well as opportunities for smaller businesses and organizations to gain visibility. Sponsorship dollars pqmonthly.com
are — and will continue to be — a delicate balance of revenue and retaining that local, Portland community feel. We are implementing a multi-layered fundraising strategy. Our first ever ticketed fundraising event is in March (which we are also using as an opportunity to spotlight the contributions being made by this region’s LGBT community). We are developing a sustaining donor program and valueadded packages for festival attendees wishing to purchase them. Those will be rolling out soon. We are working to increase Portland’s Pride celebration as a destination for people from around the entire Pacific Northwest, and beyond. While our new funding efforts will help to cover the costs of what we do — and continue to allow us to support community efforts — Pride is by no means immune to economic realities. We need our community’s support. In order to maintain and improve the quality of the Pride experience for current and future generations, it will take all of us; it will take community-wide financial support. You may ask, “Why should I care about Pride or contribute to its continued success?” While I could cite many reasons, there is one in particular that I want to focus on. Pride has an undeniable economic and social impact on Portland and our LGBT businesses and organizations; the visibility that small businesses and other nonprofit organizations receive by participating in the Pride Festival and parade is tremendous. At the same time, LGBT businesses and community organizations — which bring dollars into our community, which give us our voice and provide our services and safety nets — have been hit especially hard by the economy, and periodically struggle to take advantage of Pride’s visibility and connection. My point is this: if everyone who attends Pride were to contribute, not only could we minimize the dollars needed from community and nonprofit organizations — for providing space at the festival and in the parade — we could come close to eliminating them altogether. Think about the message that would send — to know that the entire LGBT community not only supports their own visibility and celebration, but that we also support and stand behind our businesses and community organizations, that we celebrate and confirm our commitment to their (and our) success. That $7 donation at the gate is the heart and soul of how YOU can ensure that we are able to continue to present one of the largest Pride celebrations on the West Coast — and is an investment in our entire community. Thank you, Debra Porta
President, Pride Northwest, Inc. pridenw.org
March 2012 • 19
ARTS & CULTURE
OFF-STAGE, DANCER ISAIAH TILLMAN IS TALL, DEMURE, AND HUMBLE
Photos Xilia Faye, PQ Monthly
Isaiah Tillman uses dance to explore than many facets of his identity. By Erin Rook PQ Monthly
On stage, Isaiah Tillman exudes a quiet confidence. Even without the 6’5” frame and muscular physique, he would still be statuesque. But behind the façade — which is alternately sensual, emotive, and grooving — lies a shy guy with an aversion to the spotlight. “I’m over-the-top confident on stage,” Tillman says, “but that’s not who you are going to sit down and have coffee with later.” (The coffee-shop Tillman is humble, sincere, and easy-going.) Still, each of the 26-year-old’s many dance projects speaks to a part of who he is. Burlesquire — the boylesque group he is best known for in the queer community — may not be his “neutral,” but that doesn’t mean it isn’t authentic. “Burlesquire is definitely a far out there part of me,” Tillman says. “It’s been really empowering for me to take on my sensuality and my sexuality and my body. … Burlesquire allows me to be most confident comfortable version of myself.” While Burlesquire helps Tillman make peace with his body, his work with the contemporary dance company Polaris Dance Theatre allows him to connect with his heart. “[Polaris is] really emotive,” Tillman says. 20 • March 2012
“There’s so much heart and emotion and thought; it’s like a whole other planet for me.” Polaris’ contemporary style is new to Tillman as well. Though it’s hard to believe, Tillman has no formal dance training. He was first exposed to choreography as a high school sophomore on the Parkrose dance team. His education in contemporary didn’t come until he was rehearsing to fill in for a show with Polaris, where he had been teaching hip-hop classes. “My gift, I guess, is being able to execute what I see, if I can feel it. If I feel it, my body just naturally has the ability to do it,” Tillman says. If not, he can still learn the choreography; it just takes longer. “I’m a feeler not a thinker when it comes to dancing.” That Midas touch has created a wealth of dance opportunities for Tillman, who admits he hasn’t been terribly proactive about seeking them out. “I’ve been kind of lazy when it comes to trying to do a whole bunch with my dancing,” Tillman says. “I’ve done what’s come organically. Thank god that’s been some really cool things.” In addition to performing with Polaris and Burlesquire, Tillman recently began a dance collaboration with figure skater Lee Graham called Echo. “[Graham and I] have a very similar aesthetic and a similar presence or prowess, a
similar concept about sexuality and identity. We are on the same page,” Tillman says. “I’ve rarely been as excited about a partnership the beginning of something. It just works.” Tillman is also performing with The Detail later this month in its show Around the World Through the Movement of Detail, a professional showcase of diverse dance styles directed by Durante Lambert. In addition to performing, Tillman is the staff choreographer and creative director for the Portland State University Steps of Rhythm dance group and just wrapped a nine-year gig teaching choreography to the Parkrose Dance Team (which won the state championships in 2011 and 2011). He has also taught dance teams at 12 other area high schools. For as much time as he spends on stage — he recently had five performances over one weekend — Tillman is actually averse to attention. “I’ve always hated people looking at me,” he says. “I’m fine if nobody notices me.” But he clearly loves to dance, so he psyches himself up for the spotlight. He imagines himself telling the crowd, “You’re not ready for this.” With his first movement, he is transformed. “Once the music is on all of my insecurities, all of my flaws, either don’t exist, don’t matter, or are now a good thing,” Till-
man says. “Afterward, I’m right back to quiet me.” He has felt music’s pull since childhood. As a boy, Tillman was painfully shy and, because he stuttered so badly, only spoke to or through his grandmother. “She would interpret for me,” he recalls. (Tillman doesn’t stutter now.) Dance, on the other hand, provided Tillman both a means of expression and an escape from the trials of growing up different. “[It’s] is an outlet for me. It’s the only thing that gets me out of my head,” Tillman says. “I felt alive; I felt special in a good way. It was the first positive response I got for being different.” Tillman, who identifies as queer, came out when he was 12 and got teased for his stutter, his big butt and lips, and the way he dressed. After seeing Janet Jackson’s Velvet Rope Tour, dance also became the dream. While he’s still open to dancing back-up for Janet, Tillman wants his own studio or company, where he can share his approach to dance. “You dance because it’s a gift,” Tillman says. “You’re fortunate to be able to do it and receive those things.” For more on Tillman’s upcoming performance with The Detail, visit thedetaildance.com. pqmonthly.com
CALENDAR
GET OUT! Ongoing: Now through April 1
Saturday, March 17 & Sunday, March 18
Want the full scoop? Head over to pqmonthly.com to check out the full calendar of events, submit your own events, and look through photos from parties around town!
Genderf**king Takeover and SALT presents The MADONNA Party! Hosted by Carla Rossi, with Triangle Productions presents The Young Person’s Guide to performances by Asia Ho Jackson “The Irish Curse,” Martin Castel- the Gay Men’s Chorus, a multi- and Saturn; with prizes for best la’s play about the inadequacies media extravaganza, features local Madonna! 9 p.m., Red Cap Garage, and “short comings” of men. 7:30 teen actors performing on video 1035 SW Stark, 21+ p.m. Thursdays-Saturdays, 2 p.m. with the PGMC. Showcasing the The Imperial Sovereign Rose Sundays, The Sanctuary@Sandy most memorable works of gay Plaza, 1785 NE Sandy, $15-35, choruses, the songs will serve as Court crowns the next generatripro.org the soundtrack to a PGMC-orig- tion of the drag monarchy with inal “sitcom.” 8 p.m. Saturday, 2 the 36th Annual Rosebud and p.m. Sunday, Kaul Auditorium, Thorn Pageant. 10 p.m., The Ongoing: March 23 Reed College, 3203 SE Woodstock Escape Nightclub, 333 SW Park, rosecourt.org Blvd., $16-30, pdxgmc.org through April 28 defunkt theatre presents “Fire Island,” a play by Chuck Mee about Sunday, March 18 Sunday, March 25 the need to be loved regardless of Looking for a girl who will make Beefcake Walk 2012. Spend a age, race, gender, or sexual ori- Sunday afternoon with the Oregon you laugh? Dana Goldberg brings entation. 8 p.m. Thursdays-Sun- Bears and their non-traditional the funny to town with a night of days, Back Door Theater, 4319 SE “cake walk.” 6 p.m., The Eagle comedy, with performances by Hawthorne, $15-20, defunkthe- Portland, 835 N Lombard, 21+ drag king Landon Cider and local atre.com Tranz Guyz Discussion Group funnylady Belinda Carroll! 7 p.m.,
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forming Arts, One Eugene Center, Eugene, $25 adults, $15 students, iscee.org C.A.L.I. Records Benefit! Featuring live performances by Old Wars, Slutty Hearts, and the Happening. 8 p.m., Record Room, 8 NE Killingsworth, 21+, $5-10, calirecordspdx.com Sugar Town … celebrating the ladies of vintage soul and R&B with one of the finest LGBTQueer soul dance parties in town. This month, DJ Action Slacks welcomes Oakland’s DJ Wam Bam Ashleyanne. 9 p.m., The Foggy Notion, 3416 N Lombard, 21+, $5
Sunday, April 1
The Fighting Fillies vs. the Shockwave. Portland’s two womaddresses topics like coming out, Star Theater, 13 NW 6th, 21+, $20, en’s full-contact football teams battle out a grudge match three hormones, “passing,” dating and hotflashdances.com Friday, March 16 years in the making. 1 p.m., HillDarcelle Happy Hour Show! relationships, family issues, and sboro Stadium, 4450 NW 229th Proceeds will benefit The Living sex. 6 p.m., Q Center, 4115 N Mis- Thursday, March 29 Ave., Hillsboro, $10 adults, $5 stusissippi, pdxqcenter.org Room, a safe haven for GLBTQQ Pride Northwest presents An dents youth in Clackamas County. 6 Evening With the Portland Mayp.m., Darcelle XV, 208 NW 3rd, Monday, March 19 oral Candidates, a unique opporJoin Planned Parenthood $20, 21+ Gay Skate for SMYRC! Skate it tunity for the candidates to meet Columbia Willamette for a Trivia out while benefiting the Sexual with the LGBTQ community and Pants-Off Productions pres- Minority Youth Resource Center. discuss our issues and priorities Night Fundraiser for the Equal ents Magical Gadgets, an all- 7 p.m., Oaks Park Roller Skating through one-on-one conversa- Access Fund. 6:30 p.m., Dig a Pony, ages musical evening featuring Rink, 7805 SE Oaks Park Way, $6. tions. 5 p.m.-8 p.m., Jupiter Hotel, 736 SE Grand, 21+, $5-10 suggested donation. Lynx, Tender Forever, and Glit800 E Burnside, $75 or $100 for terfruit! 8 p.m., Agnes Flanagan two, pridenw.org Chapel, Lewis & Clark College, Thursday, March 22 Tuesday, April 3 Free! Magical Gadgets is part of Gay & Grey Happy Hour Social T he Border Riders Motorthe 31st Annual Lewis & Clark for LGBTQ seniors and allies. 4 Friday, March 30 cycle Club holds a meet-andSNAP! ‘90s Dance Party! Res- greet for gay men interested in Gender Symposium. For more p.m.-6 p.m., Crush Bar, 1400 SE ident DJs Doc Adam and Colin recreational motorcycle tourinformation, visit go.lclark.edu/ Belmont, 21+ Jones welcome AC Lewis and ing. 7 p.m.-9 p.m., The Eagle gendsymp/. Same DNA to town. 9 p.m., Holo- Portland, 835 N. Lombard, 21+, cene, 1001 SE Morrison, 21+ Peep Show’s got March Mad- Friday, March 23 borderriders.com The Oregon Bears migrate to ness, thanks to the return of Sally the Eagle for the Double X Dance, Ingus Wilder and co-host Little Wednesday, April 4 Tommy Bang Bang. With too the scruffiest night in town! 9 p.m., Saturday, March 31 Ani Difranco’s songs have Kiss Kill, a local queer-fronted many performers to name! 10:00 C.C. Slaughter’s, 219 NW 3rd Ave., been part of almost every les- pop-punk quartet, performs their p.m., Red Cap Garage, 1035 SW 21+. bian’s history, and now’s your “intense, honest rock tunes” live. Stark, 21+, No cover! chance to “get nostalgic” and see 8 p.m., Crush, 1412 SE Morrison, Saturday, March 24 her live, featuring songs from her Inferno turns up the heat, with new album “¿Which Side Are You 21+, $4 Saturday, March 17 Need a Gaycation? Guest DJ SoCal’s finest Drag King, Landon On?” (and maybe a few classics). Katie Stelmanis of Austra spins, Cider, and DJs Bomb Shel and 8 p.m., Aladdin Theater, 3017 SE Friday, April 6 with a performance by La Pump! WildFire! Did it just get hot in Milwaukie, 21+, $35 Homomentum: Science/Fic9 p.m., Holocene, 1001 SE Morri- here? 6 p.m., DIRTY Nightclub, 35 tion. It’s queer cabaret goodness, NW 3rd, $8 cover, 21+, infernodson, 21+, $5 cover The Imperial Sovereign Court with glitter and ridiculousness at ances.com of the Emerald Empire presents every turn. 8 p.m., Fez Ballroom, Queerlandia presents Last Damsels, Divas & Dames: Lucky 316 SW 11th Ave., 21+, $5-10 slidBlow Pony. It’s the best place to Thirteen. Enter ta i ners f rom ing scale Year, Best Year: Part 2. They say the world is going to end in 2012. be seen, packing in the queer folks around the state will be rockin’ Go out with a bang, with live per- to the rafters for a night of sweaty, the house, with Diva Simone, DEEP CUTS: a queer dance formances by Sistafist and Jeau dance-ey fun. 9 p.m., Branx/ Karress Ann Slaughter, Adri- party for the music enthusiast. Breedlove! 9 p.m., Red Cap Garage, Rotture, 315 SW 3rd, 21+, $10, enne Alexander, and many more. With DJs Bruice LaBruiser, Kasio blowpony.com 1035 SW Stark, 21+, No cover! 7 p.m., Hult Center for the Per- Smashio, and very special guest pqmonthly.com
DJ Chelsea Starr. 9:30 p.m., Rotture, 315 SE 3rd, 21+, $5
Tuesday, April 10
Break out the shoulder pads and the neon spandex, it’s... NEVER ENOUGH: ‘80s Dance Night! 9 p.m., Red Cap Garage, 1035 SW Stark, 21+, No cover!
Friday, April 13
The Q Center Concert Series presents God-Des and She, LIVE at SMYRC! Join the Q Center as they open the doors to the new SMYRC space with a concert from our favorite hip-hop/pop/soul hotties. 6 p.m., 2406 NE Sandy, Suite 100, $5-15 sliding scale, pdxqcenter.org
Saturday, April 14
Storytime with Maria. Youth Librarian Maria Lowe reads stories sings songs and engages the children of LGBTQ families with activities for every age. 9:30 a.m.10:30 a.m., Q Center, 4115 N, Mississippi Ave., Free! Red Dress 2012: REDemption... End of Days. Don’t even think of showing up in anything other than a red dress. 8 p.m. VIP admission, 9 p.m. general admission, 1415 NW 12th Ave., $50-150. This party will sell out; buy tickets at reddresspdx.com Bearracuda growls into Red Cap, with dancing and DJs in one room, underwear party in the other ... what door will you choose? 9 p.m., Red Cap Garage, 1035 SW Stark, 21+, $5.
Sunday, April 15
Ecosex Nature Hike! Join Annie Sprinkle for an ecosexy hike and find your “e-spot” by exploring the sensual side of nature, including the secret sexy life of plants. 10:30 a.m., Meet at Grocery Outlet, 4420 NE Hancock, $35 advance, email kim_lobaria@yahoo.com for more information.
Thursday, April 19
Join hosts Sunny and Miss Tammy Whynot at TRANS-IT, a place to get down to the bootyshakin’ jamz of DJ Bender. 7:00 p.m., Crush Bar, 1400 SE Morrison, 21+, $3. March 2012 • 21
22 • March 2012
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ARTS & CULTURE
INSPIRE, INCITE, IGNITE Two innovative artists dish on the glories and challenges of being creative in the Rose City
Photos by Xilia Faye, PQ Monthly; art images courtesy of Nadia Buyse (upper) and painter Michael Riddle (lower)
By Nick Mattos PQ Staff Writer
Portland is full of art — so much so that it can be rather overwhelming. With the endless cycle of art walks, festivals, gallery shows, renegade installations, and student exhibitions, artsy queers could be occupied with the arts from First Thursday to Last Thursday solid. To cut through the creative din and spotlight a couple of the city’s most interesting up-and-comers, we invited two of our favorites — multimedia performer Nadia Buyse and painter Michael Riddle — to answer a few questions and tell PQ Monthly readers about their work, the ways that their sexuality informs them as artists, and the ways that the queer community can support the creative process (hint: think money).
Nadia Buyse PQ: Tell us a little about yourself and your work. NB: I live in Portland Oregon with my roommates Lisa, Brett, and Fiona, and our cats Taniwha and Fifi. I am also in my last year of candidacy in the MFA Visual Studies Program at PNCA. Currently I am in three bands: Ghost Mom, Tombstalker/Bloodbraid, and as of most recently Adrian Piper Cover Band. I have considered myself an artist since the first time I put on tap shoes at the age of 4 and since then my work has taken many forms, from the highly sophisticated paintpqmonthly.com
ings of mermaids and their stamp collections by 6-year-old Nadia to the less sophisticated “MOVIE PARTY” video series (20052010) by Nadia in her 20s. Currently I am working on a mixed media conceptual cover band called Adrian Piper Cover Band. I want to identify this as mixed media because along with multimedia aspects of the project (i.e. video, sound) there are also other aesthetical strategies like sculpture, painting, and character acting. Adrian Piper has been a huge influence on me. For those who know her work you might think it’s odd that I am covering a conceptual artist. For those of you who do not know her work — no, she is not a musician. I am in the process of taking transcripts from her installation piece “Cornered” and turning them into pop songs that emphasize certain phrases that stick out to me. PQ: How did you arrive at your medium of choice? NB: I consider my working style to be trans-disciplinary, which means that I utilize a multitude of disciplines simultaneously. If I had to choose a medium that stood out above the rest it would be performing — it was my gateway drug. I have always been a performer. I have been considering myself a performance artist since I worked as a phone sex operator when I was 20 to help save money to go to the Evergreen State College to study video art and queer experimental theater.
PQ: How does queerness inform your work? NB: The word “queer” operates like the word “trans-disciplinary” — it suggests openness or a hybridity of being. … And it sounds a lot less 90’s trashy then the word “bisexual!” Conventional hetero-normative life developments like reproduction and babies have never been on my radar. But I also date men more often than I’ve dated women. My point with indulging this personal information is to illuminate that as far as labels go this is a label I can get behind because there is wiggle room. It is this hypothetical “wiggle room” that informs me. PQ: What role do you see art playing in the queer community? NB: I think that the queer community of Portland, and most towns, offers alternative platforms for people to show work. It also offers new conversations and ways of looking than what you might get in an art institution. PQ: How can the queer community better support you as an artist? NB: I am more interested in asking what our town can do to better support artists in our queer community. How many specialized grants or opportunities are there for queer artists in Portland? But then again, how many grants or opportunities are there for regular artists? Not many. PQ: Do you feel like your queerness defines you in the larger art community?
NB: No, actually I think that most queer people think I am straight (and that most straight people just think I am a lesbian). I also think that my work doesn’t outwardly talk about my personal sexuality as much as it talks about the psychosis of identity in general, whether that identity is queer, white, black, straight, or alien. PQ: How does living in Portland inform your work? NB: I think that living in Portland informs the parameters in which I’m working. For instance, in 2010 when I was still working on the “MOVIE PARTY” series I had the opportunity to collaborate with people like Blake Cedric (aka DJ Trans Fat). If I wasn’t in Portland I wouldn’t have gotten to work with him … and I might have not been able to find anyone who would have the instinct to dress up like a shitty ninja turtle and skateboard into a wall while eating pizza. PQ: What challenges do you see artists in Portland facing? NB: The same challenge everyone has: money! PQ: We live in a city so full of art and artists — how do you differentiate yourself? NB: Mostly the hair, the flair, the savoirfaire. … Nah I don’t really differentiate myself as much as I see myself having a unique place in our community of artists. That being said, everyone knows me as the loud brown one. inspire, incite, ignite page 25
March 2012 • 23
ARTS & CULTURE
AMY RAY ON ‘LUNG OF LOVE,’ GETTING OLDER, AND HER NORTHWEST TIES By Kathy Belge
there. It’s like a second home for me. I have lots of friends in Portland. I love everything about the Northwest. I love the people. I love the environment is stunningly beautiful. I even love the rain.
PQ Monthly
Of course there’s a bit of Indigo Girl in Amy Ray, but as she sings on her sixth solo album, “Lung of Love,” there’s a bit of Joe Strummer in her DNA too. The more rocking member of the famous lesbian folk duo returns to Portland for a Doug Fir show March 27, accompanied by all three original members of the Butchies, including Portland’s own Kaia Wilson. I had the chance to talk with Amy Ray on the phone the day after album dropped about song writing, getting older, and staying inspired after 25 years as a professional musician. PQ: Tell us little bit about where the album title “Lung of Love” comes from and what that means. Amy Ray: It’s kind of hard to articulate. It came from the song “Lung of Love,” which is sort of about conflict between your physical body and your limitations and your spirit and your heart. Wanting to be in three places at one time, wanting to see and do more things than you have time for. Wanting to be more present in your relationship than you can be because of your job. We all breathe the same air and when I sing I become free of all those things and the “lung of love” is like the statement, like this is what I have to give. PQ: Listening to this album for me, versus your other albums, it seems maybe a little less angst-ridden. I’m wondering if that reflects a place in your life, where you’re at right now, or if you would even agree with that statement. AR: I don’t know if the songs lyrically have less angst in them, but I’m addressing things in a different way — from a perspective that’s like, it’s not all about my struggle. It’s all about OUR struggle. Musically, I think there’s a different picture going on than the other records. It has a little more fun in it
Amy Ray will perform at the Doug Fir Lounge in Portland March 27. and a little more vibe and so that takes away a little bit from the angst. PQ: Was that deliberate? AR: No, it wasn’t actually. I think when we got together to work on the arrangements, we didn’t really talk about how the lyrics related to the music or anything like that. We definitely had a musical intention, which was a groovier feel and try to make things really tight and danceable. PQ: That will be fun for the live shows. AR: That’s for sure, for sure. We went out in December to experiment and the new material has a certain danceability to it. PQ: You’re definitely in different place than you were 25 years ago and when you started as a musician. I wonder about the aging process as a woman in our culture, and is that reflected at all in how you approach your music? AR: Probably. I think there’s references to it lyrically sometimes. In “Little Revolution” I refer to that a little bit. But it’s not specific to being a woman in that song; although, women have a specific thing that happens to them in the eyes of society, which is you
Photo by John David Raper
become very disposable. … I don’t struggle with it so much specifically to being a woman as much as I struggle with it specific to being human and feeling age and not wanting to run out of time and all those kinds of things. PQ: You’ve got a couple of Northwest gals who are playing with you on your album; are they going with you on tour? AR: Kaia Wilson is touring with me. Melissa York is playing drums. Julie Wolfe couldn’t do the tour so, my keyboard player is a woman named Jen Stone. The last tour she was on was Ke$ha actually. Alison Martlew from the Butchies is playing with me, so I’ll have all three original members of the Butchies on tour with me. PQ: Do you try to make it a point to hire women and queer musicians? AR: No, not really. I know it looks that way, but these are just the people I play with. I definitely love playing with guys just as much. There’s no intention there. It’s just my world that I’m in. PQ: You’re a Southern girl, but is there a bit of Northwest in Amy Ray? AR: Yeah, for sure. My girlfriend of nine years is from Seattle. So I spend a lot of time
PQ: Talk about the song “The Rock is my Foundation” and your history with the church. AR: I definitely have a history with the church. I grew up Methodist and for a lot of years I probably went to church three days a week. Youth meetings, and Wednesday night suppers, and church in the morning and Bible school. I loved it. It was my community. There were a lot of good things I got out of it. But the church was pretty conservative and I started questioning things and looking at that. I know what that system has done to us as women and gay people and people of color. So I think it’s one of those complexities. I want to own it because it’s my culture that I grew up with. There’s a lot of bad things attached to it, but there’s a lot of good things attached to it to. I’m going to take it back from the conservative Christian movement. PQ: There’s an insert that’s in your CD with a beautiful piece of prose. Are you doing writing other than songs? AR: I’m not a good writer. It’s painful. I read a lot. I don’t consider myself to be that kind of writer. I have so much respect for that craft. I’ll do a little story like the one I did in the record but I probably can’t do more than that. Unless it’s a children’s book. I’ve always kind of thought it would be fun to try to explain hard things to kids, like death. But when I read some great book by Sara Waters or something and I read her writing I just think I don’t know how somebody does this. Or like a Flannery O’Conner short story. It’s mind blowing to me. See Amy Ray with Lindsay Fuller March 27 at The Doug Fir. Doors at 8 p.m.; show at 9 p.m. Tickets are $15. dougfirlounge.com
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pqmonthly.com
jeffrey horvitz portraits
inspire, incite, ignite: “Those who have suffered, understand suffering, and therefore hold out their hands.” Continued from page 23
Michael Riddle PQ: Tell us a little about yourself and your work. M R : I’m a n O r e g on nat ive, bor n i n Sa lem, grew up in a little tow n called Chiloquin and later lived in Eugene. I moved to San Francisco in 1990, a nd t hen 20 yea rs later ended up in Portland. I’m a self-taught painter, with no formal education. My therapist once called me an “autodidactic iconoclast,” and I love her for that. I like narrative, figurative art. I’m interested in mythology, symbolism, color, line, and attitude. I’m inspired by religious iconography, illuminated manuscripts, self-portraits, and sci-fi artwork. My subjects tend to be drag queens, whores and rent-boys, junkies and thieves, rebel angels and reluctant warriors. I make art because it’s fun. I really enjoy it. I am called to do it, and who am I to refuse? I feel lucky to be able to create an emotional space conta ined w it hin a f lat piece of ca rdboa rd cut from an Ikea box. It’s such a cool thing to pull a feeling from the collective unconscious, and somehow with color and a brush manifest it in real time. Sometimes it even gets me laid! PQ: How did you arrive at your medium of choice? MR : Econom ics, i n itially. When I was teaching myself to paint around 1987, I worked at Genesis Juice Co-op in Eugene and was pretty broke. I had to use cheap or free art supplies, which were mainly watercolors, guache, pastels, and craft paints. I’ve come to love these mediums. They all have a soft matte quality, which can pqmonthly.com
hold a lot of depth and light. Also, they are extremely por table, a nd probably won’t kill me when I roll a cigarette without washing my hands.
queer art scene here is very strong. I’m really looking forward to getting my work out there in our community and to working with other queer artists on projects.
PQ: How does queerness inform your work? MR: Well, I’m a big fag. I love the male body. My pieces tend to be of boys or men in romantic attitudes, sad warriors, fierce lovers. Being queer gives me a whole lot more imagery and material to work with, and a much broader a nd r icher la ng uage to play with. I make queer art because I’m a queer artist. But I am also Native American artist, and a self- taught outsider artist, and just a guy who grew up really poor in a small town. The queerness comes through i n t ra n sg ression, sex iness, boldness, and irreverence.
PQ: Do you feel like your queerness defines you in the larger art community? MR: I’m not sure if people are saying, “ You know Riddle, the queer artist?” God, at least I hope not! I’d rather they were saying, “You know Riddle, that guy who paints in cafes? His shit’s fucked up!”
PQ: What role do you see art playing in the queer community? MR: Art tends to be the medium we queers use to speak to each other, and to the world at large. It’s our role in society to inspire, incite, and ignite the heart. We as queers laugh at the past, violate traditions, and are not bound to the mundane. We are free to run with our own narratives. I think of a quote from Patti Smith: “Those who have suffered, understand suffering, and therefore hold out their hands.” As queers, that is our job. Art also serves an initiatory role — a symbolic stripping down, until we are naked and proclaiming to our peers “this is me, this is my body, this is my story!” It’s here, in this creative nakedness, that we find our commonality and create community. PQ: How does the queer community support you as an artist? How can they better support you? MR: I’m still infiltrating the queer community here in Portland. I can be a bit of a loner. I find the folks here very supportive of each other’s endeavors, and the
PQ: How does living in Portland inform your work? MR: This is such a beautiful city, with its heavy urban industry, contrasted by the spectacular nature surrounding us. Not to mention the ridiculous amount of beautiful boys to be inspired by! Over the last year, I’ve been doing most of my artwork in public. I have my little kit, and my headphones, and I will sit in various cafes in the southeast working. It’s great to talk to folks about what I’m doing, and have met many friends and encountered so much inspiration this way. PQ: What challenges do
you see artists in Portland facing? MR: Money! There ain’t no money here, and there are lots of artists competing for that nonexistent money. I also really don’t like to get caught up in having to sell my work to survive; for me, so far at least, a “working artist” is one with a day job. I mean, sure, it would be great to have folks clamoring for my work — and I would certainly never refuse a patron (charming wink!) — but as soon as economic factors come into my work and I start thinking about what will sell, I get a little derailed. I’m more satisfied and productive if I think of it as a spiritual practice than if I think of it as a job.
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Buyse’s performance project Adrian Piper Cover Band is opening for Hunx and his Punx and Heavy Cream on March 22 at Dante’s (350 West Burnside St., Portland). Doors open at 8 p.m.; show starts at 9 p.m.; tickets are $10 advance from cascadetickets.com and $12 at the door.
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PQ: We live in a city so full of art and artists — how do you differentiate yourself? MR: By being myself. My work has emotional gravity precisely because it’s personal. I just want to make you feel something! Riddle will be hosting an opening of his new show on March 29 from 7 p.m. to 10 p.m. at Sound Grounds Café (3711 SE Belmont St., Portland). The show continues through the month of April.
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PERSPECTIVES
RAIN CITY SEARCHING FOR THE GHOSTS by Nick Mattos PQ Monthly
Saturday night — Ashes is packed, but Natalie sits at the bar facing away from the crowd, running her finger along the rim of her whiskey glass. She slides the sleeve of her green hoodie up to her elbow, looks at her watch, 9:30 p.m. “Where the hell is my girlfriend?” she thinks, conscious to keep facing forward. From somewhere behind her, Natalie hears the haughty laughter of a whole league of lesbians she’d rather not see — an ex dancing with a girl Natalie once hired and subsequently fired, a random enemy hitting on an old housemate. “Goddamn, this town is tiny,” she thinks, taking a sip of her whiskey, resting the heel of her boot against the leg of the barstool. Out of the corner of her eye Natalie sees Leni, the patron saint of disenfranchised queers, an unlit cigarette in one hand and a long-stemmed glass in another. “Honey!” Leni shouts with her New York Jewish accent at some twink, sloshing her martini out of the glass, the corners of her eyes wrinkled from smiling. “You’re gorgeous, but take my advice: never get old! The ghosts become too much to deal with!” This is already too much for Natalie to deal with. “I’m 30,” she thinks as she looks down at her legs in vintage jeans. “How many more ghosts can I get?” She giggles at this in context: Ashes is notorious for being the Rain City gay bar most full of ghosts, from the spirits of famous deceased drag queens to mid-Eighties HIV patients. There was even a story circulating recently that some of the cooks recently ran into a ghost horse in the building’s basement, right near the space that connected it to the infamous Shanghai Tunnels. She sits bolt upright on her barstool, struck with a rush of inspiration and bravery. “If I’m going to be haunted,” she thinks, setting a napkin atop her whiskey glass in the universal don’t-you-dare-touch-this-barback signal, “they might as well be real ghosts.” Natalie walks quickly past the stage, pushes quietly through the double doors — she looks back as she goes through, sees the bartenders scowling with focus as they pour drinks, not noticing her. She finds herself in a room full of lockers, an old wooden staircase leading down to a door, and before she thinks about it she hears the creaking of the stairs as she descends. Dressing Room, a sign tacked on the door below reads. She pushes it open; the sharp, chalky scents of powder, dust, and industrial cleanser hit her violently. “Clean Up Your Shit,
Girls!” proclaims the chalkboard, a red lipstick kiss beneath it. Mirrors ever y where have photos of drag queens, pages of ma keup tips ripped from magazines, beefcake photos taped onto them. The pipes right above Natalie’s head make a faint rushing sound, water shooting through. She runs the tips of her left fingers over the metal surface of lockers until she touches the warm wood of a door. Is it unlocked? she wonders, reaching for the handle. Yes! She slips through the door, finds herself in a pitch-dark room full of the sound of water dripping, the scent of mildew. The basement! She slides her phone out of her pocket — “just got here, where R U?” a text from her girlfriend reads. Natalie turns on her phone’s flashlight, shines it around the basement — the light shines off puddles, illuminating mysterious boxes and objects without revealing their identities. Quietly, slowly, she descends one step, then another, sets her feet down on the basement floor. She inhales the musty air deeply and turns off her cell phone. There is darkness. She waits. Here, beneath the bar-goers and the drag queens, the whiskey shots and the Saturdaynight city, down at the root of everything there is darkness, full of ghosts, things from the past that live on without bodies. Natalie holds her hands up in front of her face, but sees only the blackness; she is without a body here too, given form only by the rhythm of water falling to the floor, cold radiating off the basement floor, her thoughts. She closes her eyes and is met with the same darkness, listening to the lively hum of the bar above, the silence below. “I expected stillness,” she thinks. “I expected to find the dead, but I was wrong. Everything here, below the Rain City, is alive.” Natalie’s heart races with the thrill of being in a forbidden place, the shock of the past intersecting with the present. Amidst the dripping, there is a happy sigh. Natalie feels her hands rest upon her heart. She turns, carefully lifts her foot up to the first step, the second, ascending the stairs up to the door. It opens; there is sound and light, heat, life, the present. She slips through the door, smiling, off to kiss her girlfriend, to drink her whiskey and dance amidst the people she never wants to see, to carry the basement and the ghosts she found there off into the land of the living. Behind her, the door slowly closes, the sliver of light from above shrinking along the wet basement floor. Then, there is only darkness.
Nick Mattos doesn’t believe in ghosts, but agrees that they tend to make a great story — and is glad that he heard this one. Reach him at nick@pqmonthly.com. 26 • March 2012
unseen: “I’ve felt invisible in my queerness since before I could even name it.” Continued from page 14
Heidi Seekins (left) says its harder to come out now that she’s married to Andrew Wiley. assumptions about a person’s identity if they know the gender of that individual’s partner. But this not only renders invisible the queerness of folks in apparently heterosexual relationships, it also erases the identity of any bisexual in a monogamous relationship. “I feel invisible as a bisexual any time I go out to a bar,” says Cameron Kude, 25, who is bisexual and currently in a relationship with a man. “If I’m at a gay bar, I’m assumed to be gay. If I’m at a straight bar, I’m assumed to be straight. I love the idea of a bi bar, where one could feel free to talk to or flirt with anybody before assuming their sexual preference.”
Visibility matters For Sossity Chiricuzio, 41, the visibility-by-association she gets as the partner of a masculine-gendered queer is no replacement for the real thing. “For anyone still wondering: standing next to a masculine-gendered queer and finally being visible does not count as a magic trick,” she says. “In fact, it makes that singular pleasure into another form of rejection, somehow, which is doubly frustrating.” See, Chircuzio is a femme who, despite her involvement in the LGBTQ community, fierce style, and visible tattoos, often feels her queerness is invisible. She recalls how that invisibility has marked her queer life since the beginning. “I’ve felt invisible in my queerness since before I could even name it,” Chiricuzio says. “I’ve always been most comfortable in long hair and
as you like it Continued from page 13
AYLI also sells a variety of gender expression supplies — packers, gaffs, breast forms, shaping underwear, dilators, STPs, harnesses for all bodies, and, eventually, binders — as well as massage products, gifts, and dance wear such as pasties and appliqués. “We’re about romance as well as sex,” Marks says. “And part of
skirts. It’s my natural state of being, and even now often leaves me feeling invisible to both queers and nonqueers alike.” As a result, she’s had to actively assert her queerness. At age 19, that meant informing her college support group that her lipstick didn’t negate her sexual identity. In her 20s, she found herself assuring “old-school dykes” at the lesbian bar she wasn’t lost, she didn’t have a boyfriend waiting in the car, and that she had “already been turned out, thank you.” These days, though, she puts less energy into giving signals and instead holds out hope that people will start taking more responsibility for their assumptions and make an effort to really see one another. “I think the key is doing what comes hard to everyone in this fastpaced world we’ve created: taking the time to thoughtfully engage with or observe other people,” Chiricuzio says. “I frequently see other queers on the bus that might, if they actually looked at me for a moment, [take] in the various visual cues in my appearance and notice my direct gaze that is seeing them, and in return, see me.” Because however queers accomplish it, there’s no denying that visibility matters. “ Visibility is also important because when others see you, they feel more comfortable being visible themselves,” Seekins says. “Being open and visible with our identities will encourage others to introspect about their own identities and/or to be open with identities that they have previously kept to themselves.”
romance is feeling comfortable with yourself. So that’s kind of how it all ties together.” Once AYLI finds a physical home, Marks says she hopes the shop will become a resource for all things “ecosexy.” In the meantime, she and her network have been hosting events and tabling at popular events such as Dirty Queer and Blow Pony. You can find As Your Like It at www.asyoulikeitpdx.com. pqmonthly.com
ARTS & CULTURE
ON DEFUNKT’S ‘FIRE ISLAND,’ SPRINGTIME IS HOT AGAIN
Exp. 3/15/12
(Left) Angela Fair and McKenna Twedt; (right) Matthew Kern, McKenna Twedt, Tom Mounsey, and Jason King. By Daniel Borgen PQ Monthly
Fire Island has a rather notorious, sordid history in our collective pop culture psyche — long referenced as a big gay refuge, its heritage isn’t all queer. Writers like Joan Didion have also used it as a point of reference. We’ve seen it name-dropped on sitcoms from “Will and Grace� to “30 Rock� — the whole of those references were certainly quite gay. Donna Summer has performed there, Rufus Wainwright has crooned about it — The Village People even named a song “Fire Island.� So it’s fitting that notoriously gender-bending, queer-friendly defunkt theatre company’s next production is just that: “Fire Island.� defunkt’s co-artistic director, Matthew Kern, promises theater-goers that their newest production “contains the most explicitly gay material we have yet tackled.� This inching into the queer realm didn’t happen overnight. Kern, who co-helms artistic direction with Grace Carter — the director of “Fire� — talked a little about the company’s history and intent: “In 2010, we produced ‘4.48 Psychosis’ by Sarah Kane, who was a lesbian, and while the focus of that play is not her sexual orientation, it’s definitely an element and something we tried to explore and mine.� Additionally, defunkt tackles and challenges notions of traditional gender roles, of masculinity and femininity — but “Fire Island� seems to be taking that culmination to entirely new levels. “It is about all kinds of relationships, both gay and straight, and between older people and those just starting out in life,� Kern explained. “I didn’t come to defunkt with the specific agenda of ‘gaying’ it up, but it’s part of who I am so I am sure it always inf luences how I approach pqmonthly.com
materia l, what interests me. I’m drawn to material that illuminates the common ground between people who are seemingly different, and sexual orientation is one of those differences.� The material in “Fire Island,� created by playwright Chuck Mee, appealed to defunkt for a variety of reasons, among them successful past experiences with Mee’s plays. “defunkt did a Chuck Mee show in their first season,� Kern said. “So we’ve been aware of his work for a long time. I think we felt it was a good time to return to our roots, in a sense. We were drawn to ‘Fire Island’ because it’s very romantic — hopefully in a totally nonsappy way — and that really appealed to us. “Also, Chuck is incredibly generous in allowing you to change and shape his material and make it your own. This play is kind of like a collage; it’s a series of scenes following different characters. Some of the material is taken from his other plays; some was written specifically for ‘Fire Island.’ Together it’s a beautiful and funny exploration of love and passion in all its forms.� In “Fire,� a cast of seven actors play 36 different characters. Some of the characters are seen only once and others return. Couples meet for the first time — others have been together for years and are at a crisis point. “Love is explored from all angles,� Kern said. “I think what drives the evening is this sense of indestructibility of the desire for that kind of connection in one’s life, no matter what the challenges, and no matter how much life and breakups and failed relationships threaten to beat it out of us. Some part of us is always hoping to walk around the corner and meet the love of our life, or find a way to make it work with whoever we are with at the time.� Kern, who also acts in the play, grew
Photos by Andrew Klause
NEWS up on the East Coast, keenly aware of Fire Island and all its gay ramifications. While helping helm this production, he came across many people who didn’t know about the location’s special meaning to the queer community. “We actually upped the gay content a bit,� he said. “One of the characters I play in a number of scenes was written as a woman and we changed it to be a man. There’s a hilarious monologue that was originally written as a woman but played by a man, telling a wannabe cowboy off. There’s a female couple we see more than once. The show is about romantic love — and sensuality is a component of that, so it was important to us that the characters have a real heat between them.� Enough to entice you yet? “Fire Island� offers insight into relationships, sensuality, sexuality, genderbending; it also offers a rare opportunity to see a handful of actors playing over 30 roles. You still need more? Try this: The play’s run will benefit Cascade AIDS Project; defunkt will donate a portion of door proceeds to the non-profit. “We were lucky enough to receive a couple of grants to work on ‘Fire Island,’� Kern said. “That funding allowed us to give something back to the community with the proceeds from the show. Given the subject matter, CAP seemed a really good fit. It’s a great way for us to do something for the community and also to help us reach new audience members who may be familiar with CAP and Pivot but new to defunkt theatre.� “Fire Island� runs March 23 through April 28. defunkt performs at The Back Door Theater, 4319 SE Hawthorne. For ticket information, visit defunktheatre.com. Be sure to stay with PQ’s blog for more on this production — including an interview with the director of “Fire,� Grace Carter.
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ARTS & CULTURE
THE AUTHENTIC JEAN FOGEL ZEE: IDEALIST, STRUGGLER, DANCER By Nick Mattos PQ Monthly
Jean Fogel Zee wants us all to dance the way we were born to. After a celebrated and innovative career in the world of professional dance, Zee brought together her love of movement with a hunger for self-actualization when she discovered Authentic Movement — a method of effortless movement and witnessing that emerged from the framework of Jungian analysis. W h i le Aut hentic Movement is primarily utilized as a means of self-exploration and healing, the practice informs t he work of ma ny notable local dancers, including KajA n ne Pepp er a nd Ta h n i Holt . A f t er 20 years of practice and teaching during which she beca me one of t he world’s most celebrated Authentic Movement facilitators, Zee took a hiatus from publicly offering the work; however, she recently chose to come out of retirement and offer a free Introduction to Authentic Movement workshop on April 1. In advance of the public workshop, Zee sat down with PQ Monthly in her SE Portland studio to talk about her work as a facilitator, the healing power of “seeing and being seen as we are,” and the way that radical acceptance can transform our lives and the queer community. PQ Monthly: First off, who are you? Jean Fogel Zee: I am a passionate idealist who has learned how to navigate in a very imperfect world. I am a struggler. I like to pay attention to detail, all detail, good or bad. PQ: What led to dance, and to Authentic Movement? JFZ: I think I was born a dancer, really. My first experience of dancing was with my father, dancing soft-shoe in the morning. He taught me all the couples dances that were popular at the time, and in Texas where we lived you could take children into the bars. He’d take me out on the weekends, fill the jukebox with quarters, and we’d cut a rug. Some of my first memories are very 28 • March 2012
much like a Degas painting, the dark wood of the dance studio, the light shining off the floor, the smell of leather ballet shoes. I studied dance professionally in many different cities under many teachers, and after a long process I wound up in Eugene as a member of the Mary Oslund+ Dance Company. However, during this time I sometimes felt overwhelmed by the façade and the artifice of the field. As for what led me to Authentic Movement, a student of mine went off to study it, and when she returned she shared with me the ver y simple technique that she learned. It saved m e, a n d d e ra i l e d my plans to end my dance career. I found Authentic Movement just when I needed it. PQ: For those who may not be familiar with the technique, what is Authentic Movement? JFZ: It is is a very Photo by Xilia Faye, PQ Monthly s i m p l e p r a c t i c e between two or more people in which there are two roles: the mover and witness. One is invited to move their body, to dance, to breathe, to express without any sort of effort. That process is observed by a witness, who simply witnesses the movements as they unfold. Each of these roles begin from a very simple and supportive place. Through practice and through the exchange of experiencing both of these roles, there is an exponential progress and growth that happens for oneself. It certainly happened for me and I’ve witnessed it happen for hundreds of people. PQ: What did you find when you started practicing Authentic Movement? JFZ: I found… a place that I could go any time I wanted that always surprised me, where I didn’t always find what I was looking for or what I expected it to be, but was always a safe space, always dependable and full of information. PQ: What made you decide to bring others to that place? JFZ: People asked it of me, and it was difficult. I really struggled to teach it, and found it very challenging… partially because I had so much technical training from so many teachers. It’s said that what
we want to learn, we need to teach, and I was somewhat damaged by the training that I internalized; in order to learn authenticity, I needed to unlearn some of the training. PQ: Can you speak a little more about “undoing the training?” Does that process applies equally to, say, dancers undoing their technical training as it does for nondancers who are undoing the sort of “training” we get from living in this society? JFZ: Mary Whitehouse, the woman who crafted Authentic Movement, was a dancer all her life and later became a Jungian analyst; she always said that her most difficult students were dancers. When we learn different techniques, we learn to layer and apply, take something else on that’s not ours. What Whitehouse discovered was that, in the authenticity of movement and of being, we return to the state of the body when we are young. When we move when we are young, we don’t think about it — we just move. We do as much learning as we need to do and then the body naturally takes over. When a child looks up to the sky, their whole body looks up to the sky; when he or she looks down, their whole body looks. The unlearning brings us closer to the body, which brings us closer to this innate state. The dancer has the learned movements of the dance; the non-dancer has the learned movements of their world, where they grew up, what they’ve observed, the different stories inside them, the hurts and joys. Psychologically speaking, there is a lot that the body holds, especially that which is left unseen or unsaid. We are all walking maps of our history, and “unlearning” is how we go beneath the map to the person we actually are.
the work that comes from moving and being witnessed moving — there’s an opening that happens. In the beginning, it’s not easy, the same way that it’s not easy to come out and say to the world “I’m gay.” The idea of setting this aside and simply being seen as we are allows for that identity to be included, but at the same time we can develop that internal witnessing of ourselves, in which we’re not dependent upon the labels. It’s a matter of developing this slow, gentle inquiry into what happens when we allow ourselves to be seen. PQ: Dancing, whether it’s on the stage or in the clubs, figures so heavily in the queer community. What role do you see movement and dance playing for queer people? JFZ: I really think the role of movement and dance serves as the actualization of a person coming into themselves. Dance itself is pure free expression. I mean, may we all dance! May the whole world dance! May we all die dancing! PQ : You ta lk about how “the body holds what is unseen.” Do you believe jean fogel zee page 30
PQ: What sor t of promise does Authentic Movement hold for queer people and the queer community? JFZ: I think any space that is safe and invites being seen as we are is a step towards awareness, towards knowing oneself. At the same time, there’s something expoPhoto by Xilia Faye, PQ Monthly nential that happens in Jean Fogel Zee is among the world’s most celebrated Authentic Movement facilitators. pqmonthly.com
pqmonthly.com
March 2012 • 29
PERSPECTIVES
The Lady Chronicles HOW WILL I KNOW? By Daniel Borgen PQ Monthly
Of t he countless dating scenarios I’ve embarked upon (a commentar y on my age more than my romantic aptitude), there’s a version I’ve not encountered until now — the one with the affixed expiration date. It’s like this: boy meets boy, boys share first date drinks and sloppy games of pool at my preferred first-date haunt, Hobo’s (dim lights, enough anonymity), boys imbibe a bit too much (blame the venue’s generous pours), boys go face down in chili cheese fries at the Roxy before saying their goodbyes. The second date (already unfamiliar territory): two days later we’re sipping coffee — during daylight hours, no less—at a café on the eastside. There, during more hours-long socializing, boy informs me of his imminent departure. He’s moving in two months. And, all at once, it’s head vs. heart. I’m analyzing signs, signals, and what-ifs faster than I pour vodka down my throat any given Saturday. Despite his unfortunate declaration, our second go-around, to my continued surprise, fares better than the first. I even traipsed over to the eastside during morning hours — in lieu of heading home the other direction during habitual saunters of shame. Conversation is relentless — movies, music, all the shit that boasts the makings of a Cameron Crowe movie — although decidedly more “Say Anything” than “Elizabethtown.” Because effortless connections remain so elusive, our eastside coffee adventure ends with a noon-time adult rendezvous back at his apartment, an encounter that somehow isn’t thwarted by an unexpected roommate and her unwelcoming canine. And before we even really notice, we’re seeing each other regularly, shirking definitions. Since I’m unable to make decisions of a ny sor t w it hout bomba rding my friends with every bit of minutiae, I turn to a handful of usual suspects, ones I codependently refer to as my collective conscience. The first, Ryan, who boasts Patrick Bateman-like emotional detachment (he calls it “informed observing”), offers his customary lecture about my “lesbianlike tendencies.” “W hy do you have to call it anything? Why can’t you just let it be? Stop trying to make things what they’re not.” The next, Andrew, entangled in his own long-distance predicament, regales me with tales of heart conquering intellect. “Do it;
you’ll regret it if you don’t.” Ingrid, a confidante since elementary school, functions as my therapist. “I’m sure you like him, but you realize you’re only into this because you have a builtin out.” I absorb all of it, yammering on incessantly about hopes, fears — then realization sets in. Accompanying my pressing desire to cut and run before our end date comes is the certainty that I’m beholden to my trajectory. Besides, steeling my heart has never really been my forte. Like the subject of some overly emotional Whitney Houston anthem, pessimism is pushed aside for the grandiose — and I’m keenly aware this situation isn’t doing much to dispel long-loathed but sneaky, creeping notions about romantic comedy-inspired happily ever afters. I am, as Ryan so often declares, a “sappy lezzie.” With that, I wonder: despite a mountain of failures, am I actually built for a lasting plus one? Our sleepovers are effortless; we muster and plan to conquer a half-joking, half-serious “movie to-do” list. We trade library books; we make meals (clarification: he makes dinner, I can’t cook). We try our hand at outings that aren’t completely bar-centric. When we do tackle queer nights, there aren’t any heated arguments about how much time is spent talking to whom; no one’s worried other manon-man conversations will result in hand jobs in the bathroom. I wait for lingering, jealous stares; they never come. (But I steal my own.) While I’m showering and getting ready for work, he’s making my bed and doing my dishes. We watch “Jeopardy” on the phone together. He endures big, loud gay brunches I know he’d rather avoid. I pet his roommate’s dog even though I’m allergic. Throughout, I’m still awed by the fact that no one’s running for the hills when dawn breaks, as has been my standard practice for innumerable months. I revisit Ingrid’s words — I’m in this because I can see the end. The usual issues don’t come up; things don’t get ugly because there’s no need; I’m forgiving and agreeable in shorter bursts. No one’s running because no one has to — separation is already scheduled, assured, just delayed a little. I’m convinced of this: it’s hardest to channel Buddha when you’re examining your own romantic entanglements. So, for now, I won’t. And despite a rather constant, nagging assurance I’d resort to all my comfortable sabotages if indefinite were a real possibility, I’ll find a measure of comfort in temporary normalcy. And maybe even make it something Buddha can build on.
jean fogel zee: “the body holds what is unseen.” Continued from page 28
this happens only on a personal level, or does it also happen on a larger level — say, in the body of a group, a community, or a nation? JFZ: Absolutely! Through the sciences we’ve learned so much about the nature of the body, and it’s fascinating that so many of the findings observe that the body is the microcosm of the world… we have our own cycles and rhythms personally as well as societally. More fundamentally, we aren’t “like” nature, or amongst nature — we are, ourselves, nature. It’s a wonderful thing, that we are just a smaller expression of our communities. PQ: What do you think the queer community can do to be a safe container for those within it? JFZ: That’s a difficult one, because it’s such a constantly moving, shape-shifting aspect of culture. The image I get is like a root system, or mushrooms — a mycelium web that is part of and beneath everything. We are everywhere. The closest I can get to an answer is that we need to allow ourselves to see each other as we are, to give the acceptance that each of us needs to each other, even to those who can’t give it
to us. We just need to carry on, being seen and available and loving, doing the next right thing. PQ: Finally, to follow-up on the very first question: who are we? JFZ: I think we are life. We hear things like “we are one,” all these sayings about us all being one world, but the reality is that the world is like that, and constantly becoming more so. We are closer to our own unseen parts than we have ever been before. When the world was smaller, and everything was farther apart communication-wise, we could overlook it; it’d take a long time before you heard about events. Now, this contraction is happening, and it’s not going to stop. What’s it going to be like in another 30 years? Energetically, we are moving towards each other, constantly; there’s no way to get away from one another, from seeing each other and being seen. This is a wonderful thing. Jean Fogel Zee will be offering a free Introduction to Authentic Movement workshop on April 1. For more information about the workshop and Jean Fogel Zee’s work, go to www.jeanfogelzee.com.
This whole scenario might even be reason enough for a Grindr hiatus. Formerly Lady about Town, Daniel now pens TLC. Email him at Daniel@PQMonthly.com. 30 • March 2012
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DAMON BOUCHER AND GUESTS By Nick Mattos PQ Monthly
Let’s face it: we’re all dirty queers sometimes. If your taste currently runs towards the filthy-gorgeous side,
you’d do well to congregate at the Someday Lounge on March 31 and witness local rapper Damon Boucher perform his sophomore album, “Love Me Like A Rollercoaster,� in its entirety for the first and last time. Boucher’s first album, “Superfag,� released last April, raised eyebrows and won fans with its dark, synth-heavy take on young gay life. “Love Me Like A Rollercoaster,� while just as hard-edged and steely-eyed as “Superfag,� keeps the angst but turns the horniness up a few notches. The guest performers joining Boucher to perform “Love Me Like A Rollercoaster� on March 31 are
a veritable who’s-who of Portland’s queer hip-hop underground. Highlights include Glitter Express, Neil Von Tally, Boys + Mixtapes (formerly of Chichi and Chonga), the absurdly gorgeous Kitty Morena (also for merly of Chichi and Chonga), and the sexy and talented Jeau Breedlove. Those who like to trip out while they rock out are in luck: live visualizations by Alex Boyce are sure to entrance. Once Damon Boucher Boucher and his crew drive the audience wild, DJs Pocket Rock-It and Roy G Biv will take over for a latenight dance party and keep the freaknasty level high. All in all, it’s a night certain to get you sweaty — one way or another. Da mon Boucher a nd guests perform at 9 p.m. on March 31 at the Someday Lounge (125 NW 5th Ave., Portland). Entry is $5 at the door and includes a copy of Boucher’s album. Sorry, kids — this is a 21-andover night of queer music. For more information on Boucher, a nd to stream “Love Me Like A Rollercoaster� in its entirety for f ree, check out da monboucher.bandcamp.com/.
Sister Spit, every queer’s favorite gang of touring writers and performance artists led by writer Michelle Tea (“Chelsea Whistle,� “Valencia,� “Rent Girl�), is coming to Portland in April, with shows at Holocene and Lewis & Clark. The 2012 tour features legendary author Dorothy Allison (Bastard Out of Carolina), writer and musician Brontez Purnell (“FAG School,� Younger Lovers, Gravy Train!!!), performer and playwright Erin Markey (“Green Eyes,� “Puppy Love: A Stripper’s Tail�), comic artist and writer Cassie J. Sneider (“Fine Fine Music�), and nationally-ranking slam poet and Mr. Transman 2010 Kit Yan. The Holocene show with also feature local comic artist Nicole J. Georges and a “Valencia – The Movie� chapter by Aubree Bernier-Clarke. Learn more and get tickets at radarproductions.org. Another queer luminary is coming to town later in the week. Our favorite lesbian news crush, Rachel Maddow, is coming to the Crystal Ballroom April 15 as part of the tour for her book “Drift: The Unmooring of American Military Power.� Hosted by Powell’s, the event will include Maddow talking, signing things, and inspiring swooning. No word on whether the Crystal will have fainting couches on hand. Get tickets at the Bagdad Theater, the Crystal Ballroom, Edgefield, or at etix.com. Bitch Media Presents: A reading with Everett Maroon – a memoirist, speculative fiction writer, pop culture commentator, and frequent contributor to Bitch. He will read from his memoir “Bumbling into Body Hair: Tales of an Accident-Prone Transsexual� March 25 at In Other Words. Premier NW hip-hop dance company The Detail presents its spring show “Around the World Through the Movement of The Detail� the last weekend in March. Directed by Durante Lambert, the show will feature a variety of dance styles and a number of dancers from the LGBTQ community, including Isaiah Tillman (profiled on page 20). All three shows will be held at The Dolores Winningstad Theatre. Tickets are available at the PCPA box office and ticketmaster.com. Can’t wait that long to see Tillman perform? You can catch him March 16 at “Behind the Pasties,� an onstage mockumentary hosted by The Rosehip Revue and Sinner Saint Bur-
ARTS BRIEFS
Isaiah Tillman; Photo by Xilia Faye, PQ Monthly
lesque. He will also grace the stage at Crush March 17 with fellow Burlesquire performer Esequiel Cortez at the one-year anniversary of Burlescape. Produced by Zora Phoenix, the show will also feature Mona de Plume and Divine de Flame. Tickets are sold at the door. Round out the weekend by catching Tillman at Sinferno Cabaret at Dante’s Inferno. Pacific Northwest College of Art video installation students present 24 KARAT PRETENSE, an exhibition stage at Pioneer Place Mall the weekend of March 15-17. The exhibition will include a workout video by Carla Rossi (the drag alter-ego of Anthony Hudson) as well as works by Kris Clouse, Kaija Cornett, Demian Dine “Yazhi,â€? Zack Dixon, Insa Benita Evans, AndrĂŠ C. Filipek, Adam Johnson, Brenna Lavin, Izidora Leber, and Lee, K. Valencia. The artists will address themes included appearance, concealment, deception, and identity. PNCA alum Gia Goodrich will facilitate a discussion following Saturday’s opening reception. Another PNCA alum, queer Portland artist Finn Paul, has his Photographic Portraiture hanging at Q Center this month (through March 30). Paul’s video work has screened at the Seattle Lesbian and Gay Film Festival, the San Francisco Short Film Festival, and the Athens International Film Festival. He has also performed in New York City with Lacy Davis. Can’t make the show? Check out his work at finnpaul. wordpress.com. Queer hip-hop duo God-Des and She will perform live April 13 at the official ribbon cutting ceremony for the new program space for the Sexual and Gender Minority Youth Resource Center (SMYRC). They will be joined on stage by queer youth performers. Sliding scale tickets can be purchased via Q Center online. Performance artist and sex educator Annie Sprinkle teams up with As You Like It owner Kim Marks (profiled on page 13) April 15 to host an “ecosexy explorationâ€? of the Clackamas River. Sprinkle, who has both experience in the adult film industry and a Ph.D. in human sexuality, developed the ecosex walking tour with concept artist/professor Elizabeth Stephens. Participants will learn ways to combine their love of the planet with the love of, well, making love. All adults are welcome. For more information, visit asyoulikeitpdx.com or sexecology.org.
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March 2012 • 31
THE GOOD LIFE
Cultivating Life
EAT, DRINK, AND, BE MARY BRUNCHES FOR HUNGRY POST-HIBERNATION BELLIES By Brock Daniels PQ Monthly
BLOOMING INTO SPRING By LeAnn Locher PQ Monthly
Ah, the rites of spring. What do they bring? The first pedicure of the season. Feeling a breeze on arms bared for a moment in sunshine. Seeing neighbors out on walks we really only see nine months of the year, the other three lost to the darkness, cold, and rain. But really what says spring to me? The blooming flowers and budding branches of the plants surrounding us. I asked my Facebook followers (www.facebook.com/sassygardener; you should come join us) what flower most says spring, and I love the varied answers. From Jacquelyn’s camellia that blooms outside her bedroom window, to Carla’s iris reticulate, to Gary’s resounding cherry trees, and Laura’s love of the smell of fresh cut grass, the question is personal and so poignant to those of us who value watching the seasons change. Honoring these seasonal changes is inherent to Japanese culture. Hanami in Japanese refers to picnicking under a blooming cherry or plum tree, welcoming spring with friends, family, sake, and dumplings. Cherry blossoms themselves are rich with meaning in Japan, symbolizing the ephemeral nature of life and blossoming viewing parties — Hanami festivals — offer a chance to reflect on life, the blooms, and honor that point in time. I love how spring offers so many opportunities to open our eyes wide to a new
season. For me, I eagerly watch for signs of crocus in a vacant lot in North Portland. I call them the feral crocus, because thousands grow here completely wild, making for a sea of purple. This tells me it’s spring.
Want to bring a little of that outdoor springtime indoors? With so much rain as part of our springs, I’m not always out in it as much as inside looking out. But bringing in cuttings from budding trees is a perfect way to savor the growth and unfurling of spring up close and personal (while keeping warm and dry). Josef Reiter of Botanica Floral Design suggests using peach, cherry, plum, or quince cuttings. I asked Josef about hammering the woody bases before putting them in a vase, and he said it doesn’t really make a difference. “If you can break the stem instead of smashing it or cutting it with pruning shears, it opens up a lot of space to drink the water up,” Reiter said. To keep the tall branches from toppling your vase, try using decorative rocks in the bottom.
Feel like eating spring up? Oh for the love of fresh produce and the tender and varied flavors of spring. First up for me? Chives, snipped fresh from the garden and used in a weekend breakfast of eggs and chevre. They are so easy to grow, come back on their own every year, and their late spring/early summer purple blooms add color and bite to salads. Speaking of salads, spring also means fresh greens, and how can I forget asparagus?
Mark your calendars While Portland Farmers Market has had a winter market at Shemanski Park on Saturdays, there’s really nothing like the grand Portland Farmers Market at Portland State University. The market — two full blocks of locally grown and crafted food — opens for the season March 17 at 8:30 a.m. Many of the other neighborhood markets will open in May and June. Hortlandia, the Hardy Plant Society of Oregon’s spring plant and art sale, is the whammy of spring plant sales. This year it features 72 nurseries and more than 30 local artists specializing in art for the garden. Held at the Portland Expo Center, April 7, 10 a.m. – 4 p.m., and April 8, 10 a.m.-3pm. www.hardyplantsociety.org Hana Matsuri, the flower festival celebrating the birth of Buddha at the Portland Japanese Garden, will feature a special shrine decorated with flowers and a prayer ceremony on both days of the festival and Saga Goryu Ikebana Exhibition, March 31-April 1, 10 a.m.-4 p.m. www.japanesegarden.com Support a Portland treasure, Zenger Farm, simply by eating out at select restaurants or shopping at select nurseries, March 11-22. Zenger is Portland’s largest non-profit educational farm, with a mission to promote and educate about sustainable food systems, environmental stewardship, community development, and access to good food for all. Check out the listing of restaurants and nurseries at www.zengerfarm.org. Wondering about Portland’s waterfront cherry trees and when they’ll bloom? Unfortunately we don’t have cherry tree blossom forecasts like they do in Japan, but according to my calendar, last year they were in full bloom the first weekend of April. I’m keeping my eyes peeled.
LeAnn Locher is an OSU Extension Master Gardener and cultivates all kinds of good things in her North Portland garden and kitchen. Connect with her at www.facebook.com/sassygardener. 32 • March 2012
($6.25) is not a dish to taken lightly at Gravy in North Portland. Grandma’s rich mixed berry pie meets breakfast oatmeal, with a burnt sugary crème brulee topping. Take a minute to go back in time, remembering the first bite of perfectly cooked syrupy berry goodness, and now combine it with hearty steel cut oats. To die for, right? But wait … now adorn the baked wonder with a sprinkling of sugar, which is caramelized into a glass-like candy coating. Finish with a light snow of powdered sugar and sliced berries. My spoon breaks through the crisp shell with reckless abandon, and fights its way to the bottom, through the oatmeal, to find the baked purple fruit foundation.
Stepping out of the cave from hibernation, the furry cub stretches, then squints his eyes at the now-unfamiliar bright sun. Life begins to return to normal after the long slumber, and energy is restored to the city. Barely awake, the cub searches for food to appease his rumbling stomach, finding relief in the City of Roses, where each neighborhood is blessed with several brunch options. Brunch, the ever so under-utilized meal, is more than just eating a late breakfast. It truly is about mastering the delicate merger of two meals. This month you are encouraged to sample some of the best brunch dishes in Portland while getting to know their creators. For Tasty n Sons’ Burmese Red Pork Stew ($10), Chef John Gorham allows pork shoulder and belly to absorb flavors of soy and ginger for a full day. With a house-made sauce of Calabrian chiles, the bases are loaded for this masterpiece to come to fruition. A quick scorch confidently ensures Burmese Pork Stew, Tasty n Sons the flavor is set, and the juices remain inside the meat for the slow oven braise. The Pulling out, the spoon fills itself flawlessly smell creates an uncontrolled predator, but with a combination of each of the three precision takes time. Pulling the tender red levels. Steam wafts its way up and hits you nuggets out of the oven, they are relocated in the face like a prize fighting boxer. Each to a bowl of rice. Two eggs, one fried, and layer marries on the tongue in a triumphant one house-pickled (an amazing, and much bloom. Just when you think pie can’t get needed culinary feat) stand proudly atop any better, opposites attract in this brilliant the stew. A few green onions highlight the brunch dish created by Mark Greco. top, and the steaming work of art arrives at In addition to Tasty N Sons and Gravy, the table. The yolk breaks over the tender Portland is bursting with impressive brunch meat making a creamy sauce as the fork spots for this budding spring. Cubs with full goes in for the first bite. Soft, sweet, with bellies can now roam the Rose City with a hint of spice, the flavors force your eyes renewed energy to conquer the day — at shut, and you can’t help but smile. least until dinner, but that’s another issue. If your brunch tastes run on the sweeter Here are our “PQ Picks” for March brunch side, Oatmeal Brulee with Mixed Berries spots:
Tasty n Sons
Chef/ Owner John Gorham 3808 N Williams, Suite C Portland, Oregon 97212 503-621-1400 www.tastynsons.com
Gravy
Chef/Owner Mark Greco 3957 N Mississippi Ave. Portland, Oregon 97227 503-287-8800 No website
Starky’s
Chef Wayne LaCour 2913 SE Stark St.
Portland, Oregon 97214 503-230-7980 www.starkys.com
Mothers Bistro
Chef/ Owner Lisa Schroeder 212 SW Stark St. Portland, Oregon 97204 503-464-1122 www.mothersbistro.com
Gracie’s
Chef Mark Hosack 729 SW 15th Ave. Portland, OR 97205 503-222-2171 www.graciesdining.com
Meriwether’s
Chef Earl Hook 2601 NW Vaughn St. Portland, Oregon 97210 503-228-1250 www.meriwethersnw.com
Café Murray Hill
G e n e ra l M a n a g e r B o b Corser 14500 Murray-Scholls Dr., Suite 103 Beaverton, Oregon 97007 503-590-6030 www.cafemurrayhill.com
Brock Daniels, a Pacific Northwest native, has studied wine, culinary arts, gastronomy, and loves researching new food. Brock has written a self-published cookbook titled “Our Year in the Kitchen.” Reach him at brock@pqmonthly.com. pqmonthly.com
THE GOOD LIFE
DOING THE DINAH: A LESBIAN’S GUIDE TO DINAH SHORE WEEKEND Dog & Planet’s Best Friend All-Natural Pet Foods Earth-Friendly Pet Supplies Local, Hand-Crafted Goods :H 'RQDWH RI 2XU 3URÀWV WR +HOS $QLPDOV LQ 1HHG 2148 N Killingsworth St.
503-477-8381
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By Kathy Belge
As I prepared to leave town for last year’s Dinah Shore Weekend, I was told by the girl I was dating that I needed to kiss at least five women while I was there. Billed as the biggest lesbian party on Earth, with more than 20,000 tanned and board-short clad dykes descending on the Palm Springs desert, I w a s h a p py to follow her orders. Dinah Shore Weekend gets its name from famous singer who sponsored a LPGA golf tournament for years. These days the tournament is called the Kraft Nabisco Championship and it still coincides with The Dinah; but with few exceptions, Dinah Shore Weekend has nothing to do with golf and everything to do with pool parties, white parties, drinking, dancing, concerts, and, yes, debauchery. The modern-day Dinah began in 1991 when Mariah Hanson and Club Skirts started to bring in big name talent and corporate sponsors. Since 2006 there have been two main competing parties in Palm Springs, but for the first time in 2012 there will only be one, as the Girl Bar promoters move their event to the Las Vegas. The entertainment at Dinah is top notch. Past performers have included Katy Perry and Lady Gaga. This year’s line up feature Chaka Khan, Nina Sky, Suzanne Westenhoefer, Jessica Kirson
and Karen Williams, Wynter Gordon, CeCe Peniston, Dev (of Dev and the Cataracts), and BC Jean, as well as some of the top lesbian DJs in the country. Also, expect minor celebrities who wouldn’t get a second glance other places to be paraded around at the Dinah, with nightly red carpet events and meet and greets. Meredith Baxter, “The Real L Word stars,” and plenty of lesbian web series actors will be milling around VIP lounges and posing for photo shoots. Over the years various promoters have tried to cash in on the swarms of lesbians in the desert, hosting small parties away from the bigger main events. Most have come and gone, unable to make a profit competing with the larger events. Out and About Productions is the exception, hosting an intimate party whose attendees are primarily lesbians of color. Last year, I decided to take my kissing challenge seriously. The first two women I kissed were at the pre-party, a casual event held outside around the pool bar of one of the host hotels. They were actually girlfriends, both in the military, and fun to flirt with and they were than happy to grant me my kisses, as long as it was on the cheek only. Walking into a party full of gorgeous women, none of whom I knew, felt a bit intimidating. But then I figured, they didn’t come all the way to The Dinah just to sit by themselves. Soon enough, I’d made a few new friends, whom I ran into the rest of the weekend. Even so, Dinah is best enjoyed with a group of friends. It can be easy to feel lost in the throngs of lesbians, so it’s nice to have a core group to connect back up with. The best was the year I
rented a house with a group of friends from a private owner. It’s good to have a place to regroup between parties. In order to enjoy the pool parties, you need to set up early to claim a spot; otherwise, there’s no place to sit and no shade. It was while I was trying to escape the heat that I met Tee, a Hawaiian native with spiky black hair, who taught me to put an ice cube down my shorts to keep cool. She was the recipient of my third Dinah kiss, this one on the lips. When I told her about my challenge, she introduced me to her friend, who wanted to be kiss number four. I started to get excited about the evening’s possibilities. Unfortunately, too much time in the sun and not enough hydration left me exhausted and not able to fully appreciate the White Party later that night. I planted myself in the lobby and watched the lovely girls parade by, unable to muster the energy to dance or even talk to many of them. When I got up to leave, I literally had to push my way through the crowd. It didn’t take long for me to meet my five-kiss quota. I ran into one of the ladies from an earlier party at dinner on Saturday and she gave me a kiss on the lips as we said goodbye. My spirits were high as I headed out to the main party downtown at the Convention Center. My energy was back and I was ready for dancing. Were there more kisses? I’m think I’m only obligated to report of the first five … To get the most out of your Dinah experience, pace yourself, drink lots of water, and set a goal — whether to make it onto a “Real L Word” episode, to beat Doria Biddle at celebrity dodgeball, or to kiss a bunch of total strangers.
Club Skirts The Dinah
Girl Bar Dinah Shore Weekend
Out and About at Dinah Shore
PQ Monthly
March 28-April 1, Palm Springs, Calif. www.thedinah.com
April 27-29, Las Vegas, Nev. http://dinahshoreweekend.com
March 31-April 1, Palm Springs www.eventbee.com/v/outatdinah2012
Kathy Belge is a writer with a special interest in lesbian life and culture, as well as a political activist and journalist covering the LGBT community. Find out more about Kathy and her writing at www.kathybelge.com. pqmonthly.com
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March 2012 • 33
IMAGES
SEE AND BE SEEN We want to see more of you! Do you have photos you’d like to share in the pages of PQ Monthly? We’re looking for shots of our readers and their families and friends on vacation, out on the town, volunteering, taking a stand … you get the idea. Send your photos along with a photo credit and caption to info@pqmonthly.com, post them on our Facebook page, or tag PQ Monthly in them. Included in this month’s photos are shots from the PQ Monthly Launch Party, Feb. 16 at The Jupiter Hotel and Crush; Q Center Winter Gala – Never Out of Style, Feb. 18 at Yu Contemporary Art Center; Blowpony 5-year Anniversary with Leslie & The Lys, Feb. 25 at Rotture/Branx; and EASY: Disco Halloween, March 3 at Red Cap Garage.
All photos by Xilia Faye
34 • March 2012
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March 2012 • 35
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36 â&#x20AC;˘ March 2012
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March 2012 • 37
THE FUN STUFF
ASTROSCOPES WITH MISS RENEE End Up Tales Miss Renee aka Tarot Chick is an empath, tarot card reader, and spiritual astrologer of 19 years based out of NE Portland. She loves love notes so feel free to holla or schedule a tarot / astrology chart session: that_tarot_chick@yahoo.com.
Gemini
Your ruling planet Mercury is retrograding (March 12-April 4). Yup, again. So your new nickname: “Post-It Junkie.” It’s the only way you’ll keep straight on whether you’re a-comin’ or a-goin’. The sweet note: unearthing that manifesto you started awhile back. Or at least an old booty call’s number.
Aries
“What you’re experiencing is premature enlightenment,” Tyler Durden said in “Fight Club.” For a brief, shining moment Mercury (mental processes/communication) burst forth in pioneering Aries! (March 2), then promptly began retrograding (March 12). HULK SMASH! Still, take that hot one-second flash of blueprint genius and flesh it out! Freedom of movement = sooooon!
Taurus
Taurean perk: you’re easily pleased, Ferdinand the Bull. Now, though, it’s a hindrance. Powerful Pluto (death/rebirth/transformation) is harmonizing with Jupiter (luck /expansion) and Venus (love/values) in Taurus. Go deeper now. Release. Heal. Look farther. Reeeaaach! The Universe could shower you with pearls, honey, if you don’t just contentedly eat the oysters.
ANSWERS TO PUZZLES ON PAGE 39
Cancer
Harmony between the grounding earth signs and you gives amazing opportunities to root down and manifest. You’ll need to be confident about: 1) what’s to be released; 2) knowing and prioritizing your loves/ values; 3) methods of acquisition. Bonus points: work this ish out while wearing a super hero costume. Email me pics. ;)
Leo
Hey there, chipmunk cheeks. You’re gonna have to spit some of that out, baby. Jupiter and Venus squaring your sun may turn you into a “want beast” of premenstrual proportion, feverishly driving you to get while the gettin’s good! But really, a little discernment would serve you better. Now go on, spit.
Virgo
Virgos rule at figuring out what should be done and hoppin’to it! What about what you NEED? Full moon in Virgo (March 8) opposing sun in spiritual Pisces illuminated the power and necessity of turning off your head and getting in tune with your inner self. Did you? You still can. Find Waldo. ;)
Libra
No more airy “theor y.” No more diplomatic gymnastics. Your ruler Venus in earthy Taurus says get out of theoryland and manifest then root what you value/desire. Sun in “me first” Aries starts opposing you March 21, pushing you to hold ground or compromise. It’s Black Gurl Neck Roll time.
Scorpio
Scorpio’s astrological “job”: personal transformation/helping others transform. Are you slacking on your job? Planets grouping in Aries join freedom planet Uranus, compelling you to break free. Spiritual Neptune in Pisces gently washes away the snake’s shed skin, revealing new. The “devil you know” is still the devil, honey. Rise up.
Sagittarius
I’m a FB friends list pruner. I believe that — just like with healthy hair, shrubbery, and pubes — trimming’s important. South Node (a “been there, done that” astro point) in Gemini opposing you and Mercury (Gemini’s ruler) currently retrograding might produce a blast from your past that needs to stay exactly there. Snip.
Capricorn
Pluto (death/rebirth/ transformation) has been tillin’ the H-E-double hockey sticks out of your soil since 2008. Breaking attachments to routine, guilt, and outmoded definitions of success hasn’t been pleasant. BUT, benevolent Jupiter harmonizing with lovey Venus and your Sun gives you fist bumps and goodies now :) Good work.
Aquarius
Sometimes ya gotta slow to pull ahead. Your progressive ruler, Uranus, moving through proactive Aries is driving you to explore uncharted terrain. Other aspects to your sun support this. Venus and Jupiter joined in practical Taurus bait you into moving more deliberately if you want to receive blessings. Want a cookie? ;)
Pisces
Sweet mermaid/man, I feel for you. Sun/Neptune/Chiron in your sign are sensitizing an already deeply sensitive person. Yummy Venus and Jupiter in sensual Taurus, even intense Pluto in earthy Capricorn, can show you that focusing your will on the practical will manifest the support you need most now.
PQ Monthly is published the 3rd Thursday of every month. Please contact us for advertising opportunities at 503.228.3139 www.pqmonthly.com 38 • March 2012
Fear of Grinding by Anonymous
Dark was the night, cold was the ground, busy were your fingers tapping out a message on your iPhone. “Come over,” you type to the man on Grindr, not caring that his shirtless photo cuts off at the neck. Tonight you are alone, and while you’re not quite sure what you want, you know you want it to be zipless. “The zipless fuck is absolutely pure,” Erica Jong explains in Fear of Flying. “It is free of ulterior motives. There is no power game … No one is trying to prove anything or get anything out of anyone. The zipless fuck is the purest thing there is. And it is rarer than the unicorn. And I have never had one.” Maybe you’re luckier than Jong, you think. Maybe all she needed was to be a gay man in Portland with a Smartphone, a boner, a lonely heart. The door buzzes, you let him in. He’s no unicorn, certainly, but he’s here, framed in the doorway with a smile equal parts nervous and lewd. Perhaps he’ll do. It may be winter but hope springs eternal, the clothes spring off, you both spring into bed. The result is less zipless than thoughtless. Later, you’ll reflect on it and the progression between the acts won’t quite make sense, the narrative won’t quite form a single-file line. Afterward, you are sweaty and oddly stunned, sitting in your bed while your guest quickly gets dressed. “You know what I really want?” he asks, buttoning his pants. “A cherry Slurpee!” “What?” you say incredulously, the comforter around your waist. “I always want a Slurpee after sex. Do you like Slurpees?” “Um … yes. Yes, Slurpees are good.” “What’s your favorite flavor?” he says, his face hidden by the shirt he pulls over his head. “Mine’s cherry.” You wish that it wasn’t so deeply un-P.C. these days to refer to things as “retarded,” because the worry looms large in your mind that you may have just had sex with someone clinically retarded. “I like cola,” you say, playing along. “Chick-a-cherry cola!” he giggles. Erica Jong probably never had to deal with Savage Garden references, you think. “Well, I’m going to get that Slurpee. Thanks for that, tiger.” Cherry Slurpee musses your hair, inappropriately familiar as though he earned the right to do so, then turns and leaves. The door shuts and your apartment is so big and silent, the loneliness a tangible thing, filling all the space around you. Perhaps this is that “dark night of the soul” that the philosophers talked about, that place full of hunger and longing. You are so far from satisfaction, so far from the purity Jong promised, that perhaps you really would have enjoyed a Slurpee more. You sigh. “Is this the worst things get?” you wonder, then sniff suspiciously. You throw the comforter off you in horror, the mystery of your guest’s fast departure suddenly solved. No, you sigh again, that was not the worst things would get. This is. Cherry Slurpee, you’ve discovered, shat in your bed. How did your romantic encounter end up? Send anonymous stories, protecting names and identities, from awkward dating— and other—scenarios to us at enduptales@PQMonthly.com. pqmonthly.com
THE FUN STUFF
QUERY A QUEER Are you a lesbian puzzled by gay men? A transgender person pondering bisexuality? A straight person perplexed by queers of all stripes? PQ is here to help you through your “questioning” period. Send your questions to info@pqmonthly.com and put Query a Queer in the subject line. Question: When a homo gets into a relationship with someone of the opposite sex (cisgender or trans), how does that affect their sexual identity?
Answer: In other words, is a lesbian who dates a man (trans or cisgender, gay or straight) still a lesbian? Or does her identity shift or expand to reflect her partner’s identity? And what if she were to date someone who was genderqueer/third gender/ Two Spirit? Is there even a word for that?
THEME: MARCH MADNESS ACROSS 1. Frosting on a cake, e.g. 6. Heat or energy unit 9. *School with most championships 13. Love intensely 14. Dr. Cornelius in sci-fi movie classic, e.g. 15. Like dragon after knight’s conquest 16. Copperfield’s domain 17. Eating of forbidden fruit, e.g. 18. Total amount 19. *Game tracker 21. In an open way 23. Not vertical, abbr. 24. Be sick 25. Emergency responders 28. Home to Stags Leap and Wild Horse 30. Superlative of “yare” 35. Reluctant, usually followed by “to” 37. A tall one is not true 39. The present occasion
DOWN 1. Its fleece was white as snow? 2. Sixth month of civil year 3. Downward and upward dogs are part of this 4. _____ Maria Remarque 5. Suppose 6. *Georgetown’s conference, “The Big ____” 7. *Ranking based on strength of schedule 8. Major Italian seaport 9. ____ Bator, Mongolia 10. Collect telephone ____ 11. Monet’s water flower 12. “___ day now” 15. Novelist ______ Zweig 20. Muse of love poetry 22. Be nosey 24. Deadly or sinister 25. *Like last eight 26. Sweet coffee drink 27. A Beatle
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40. U.N. civil aviation agency 41. Rossini’s opus, e.g. 43. It travels through air 44. Pulsating pain 46. At a great distance 47. *Final ____ 48. Some give this when upset 50. Drug abuser 52. Dry, as in humor 53. Eagerness 55. Clinton ___ Rodham 57. Famous for its coffee 60. *Goes with March 64. NBC’s “The _____” 65. “___ to Joy” by Friedrich Schiller 67. Become one 68. On the move 69. Julie Andrews in “The Sound of Music” 70. Holy See’s administering body 71. *Ranking 72. Apollo to ancient Greeks 73. Levels
It all boils down to one larger question: Is our sexual identity defined by the gender identities of the people we date or is it an intrinsic part of ourselves that determines who we date (or something else entirely)? For those who are exclusively gay, or historically bisexual, this may seem obvious. For those with more complex dating histories, sexual identity is not always so simply defined. Some gay and lesbian folks who find themselves in hetero relationships hold on to their previous identities. (This is also often true of straight-identified folks whose previously opposite-sex partners transition.) For those who define sexual identity by the gender of one’s date, this can be disconcerting. Bisexual friends may express frustration that the individual does not claim a bisexual identity. Partners (especially those who have transitioned) may feel that their partner’s sexual identity invalidates their own gender identity. This perspective is a common one, and one which the LGBTQ rights movement often perpetuates through its focus on queer folks being “born this way.” It is currently a popular stance to take, given the perception that LGBTQ people will be less prone to discrimination if lawmakers and the public see sexual orientation as innate and immutable. But it doesn’t reflect everyone’s experiences. Sexual identity can and does shift and expand. Don’t misunderstand: socalled “reparative/ex-gay” therapy is still bad news, as are any efforts to force a change in someone’s natural, healthy patterns of attraction. But while some people’s orientations are constant, others’ are more flexible. Have I lost you yet? Here’s a mostly-true anecdotal example. Suzie Queer has historically dated women. Eventually, however, she finds herself in a relationship with a trans man. After introducing the boyfriend to her mother, mom expresses her confusion to one of Suzie’s siblings.
“But I thought she was a lesbian? Doesn’t that mean she’s repulsed by all things male?” Suzie stopped identifying as a lesbian some years earlier, preferring the flexibility of the word queer. She resisted identifying as bisexual or heterosexual because she’d never been attracted to a cisgender man. Suzie didn’t change her identity to please her partner, but simply to reflect the fact that she was clearly attracted to male-identified folks. To complicate things further, Suzie begins to question her own gender identity, finding “genderqueer” a more accurate label. If Suzie were to transition to male, how would that affect Suzie’s sexual identity? It is not unheard of for trans folks to experience a shift in their sexual orientation post-transition. That is to say, a trans woman who previously dated women might find herself attracted to men. A trans man might find himself in the same boat. While the object of affection might have changed, it could be argued that sexual identity has not. The trans woman is still heterosexual, the trans man still gay. On the flip side, other folks may find that they remain attracted to the same gender, but that the label changes along with their gender identity. In other words, it’s complicated. Sexual identity is complex, and goes beyond the L, G, and B (and less often “queer” and “asexual”) we so often align ourselves with. In addition to the varying degrees of bisexuality (encompassing homoand hetero-flexible), there are pansexuals (attracted to all genders), those who are attracted to trans or genderqueer folks (one article suggests calling them “skoliosexuals;” I’ve also heard “trans amorous”), and there are those who are attracted to both/but only cisgender women and men. It seems to come to this: born that way or not, you are who you are. You should have the freedom to explore all the facets of your sexual self without worrying about betraying whatever “team” you’re supposed to be on.
-Erin Rook, PQ Monthly staff writer
29. Daddy 31. Over your head? 32. To give an income or property 33. Scrub or purge 34. Towel cloth 36. Ungulate’s foot 38. Victorian or Elizabethan ones, e.g. 42. *Kentucky’s Rupp _____ 45. *______ beater 49. “Big Island” flower necklace 51. Simplify 54. Movie “_____ Came Polly” 56. Boredom 57. Speaker type 58. Baptism, e.g. 59. Important battery component 60. “Cobbler, cobbler, ____ my shoe” 61. Republic of Ireland 62. Done in a pot 63. Ligurian one and Adriatic one 64. Military hospitals 66. Simon & Garfunkel, e.g.
March 2012 • 39
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