2012 Child Protection wrap, March 30, 2012

Catholic san Francisco Northern California’s Weekly Catholic Newspaper

APRIL IS CHILD ABUSE PREVENTION MONTH Dear Catholics of the Archdiocese of San Francisco, This June will mark the tenth anniversary of the USCCB Charter on Children, now referred to as “Promise to Protect; Pledge to Heal.” We have fingerprinted all our clergy and the teachers in our schools for many years, but this is also the tenth anniversary of the creation of a concentrated set of policies, procedures, and activities to keep children safe in accord with the Charter. This includes all employees and volunteers who work with children, and we teach the children themselves how to stay safe.

Our combined efforts are proving successful. Children now know that they can establish boundaries and they feel freer to talk to an adult if those boundaries are violated. Adults are knowledgeable about recognizing the possibility of abuse and know how to report it properly. People who have such crimes in their background simply no longer apply to work in our parishes and schools.

Our priests and deacons have a heightened awareness of the importance of maintaining appropriate boundaries.

Even as we celebrate these successes, we are saddened by the loss of Barbara Elordi who came to work for the Archdiocese on a part-time basis in 2002 and became full-time in 2005. Barbara helped craft these programs of prevention. She directed the creation of the courses we use to teach adults and young people (grades four through twelve), and helped select the program used for children in pre-school through third grade. Barbara also acted as the liaison with adult survivors of abuse and was responsible for navigating any new allegations through the process while maintaining confidentiality to protect all concerned. She brought a love for people, an ability to accept everyone, and professional support skills to the position. She is sorely missed.

A Prayer for Healing Vctims of Abuse God of endless love, Ever caring, ever strong, Always present, always just; You gave Your only Son to save us by the blood of His cross.

Gentle Jesus, shepherd of peace, join to Your own suffering the pain of all who have been hurt in body, mind, and spirit by those who betrayed the trust placed in them.

Hear our cries as we agonize over the harm done to our brothers and sisters.

Breathe wisdom into our prayers, soothe restless hearts with hope, steady shaken spirits with faith; Show us the way to justice and wholeness, enlightened by truth and enfolded in Your mercy.

Holy Spirit, comforter of hearts, Heal Your people’s wounds and transform our brokenness.

Grant us courage and wisdom, humility and grace, so that we may act with justice and peace in You. We ask this through Christ, our Lord. Amen Copyright © 2004, United States Conference of Catholic Bishops. All rights reserved.

Please continue to help us maintain this program as we endeavor to replace Barbara and to continually improve on what we do. None of this success would be possible without your help and support. Together, we can ensure a healthy future for our children.

Yours in the peace of Christ,

Most Reverend George Niederauer Archbishop of San Francisco

In Memory of

Barbara Elordi

SAN FRANCISCO INDEPENDENT REVIEW BOARD (IRB) Archbishop Niederauer has identified a group of well-educated and highly skilled professionals to advise the Archdiocese on matters relating to abuse by clergy. This group includes a psychologist (Dr. Suzanne McDonnell Giraudo), a pediatrician (Dr. Eileen G. Aicardi), an attorney (Sr. Mary Gemma O’Keeffe, RSM), a retired judge (Honorable Claude D. Perasso), a retired policeman (Mr. Dan L. Lawson) and one pastor (Fr. John Ryan). There is a balance of men and women, and several members are also parents.

The IRB oversees the “Safe Environment” program of the Archdiocese and has acted as a consultant to religious orders of priests. The Vicar for Clergy and the Archbishop meet regularly with this Board. The Victim Assistance Coordinator and the Diocesan Attorney serve as support staff, but are not members. They, along with the Archbishop and the Vicar for Clergy, excuse themselves during IRB deliberations on particular cases. The Judicial Vicar (Msgr. Michael Padazinski) takes part in deliberations but is not a member and has no vote.

The Archdiocese’s Victim Assistance Coordinator can be reached at (415) 614-5506, and works with the Archbishop, the Independent Review Board and the Vicar for Clergy to coordinate support for victims and their families.

ARCHDIOCESE V ICTIM ASSISTANCE COORDINATOR 415.614.5506 For additional information contact Deacon John Norris, Director of the Office of Child and Youth Protection norrisj@sfarchdiocese.org or 415.614.5504

March 30, 2012

ONE DOLLAR

VOLUME 14

•

No. 11

CP2

Catholic San Francisco

March 30, 2012

Promise to Protect

Office of Child & Youth Protection

The Office of Child and Youth Protection values the continued partnership with our schools and religious education programs and our shared commitment to protecting children.

WE ARE PROUD TO ANNOUNCE 2012 Child Abuse Prevention Month Contest Winners

TALKING ABOUT TOUCHING: Grades Pre K – 3 Children, along with their parents and teachers, are learning: Common safety rules; how to ask for help when feeling unsafe or uncomfortable; ways to respond assertively; and the differences between safe and unsafe touches.

Deborah 1st Grade winner St. Charles Borromeo

Grace 2nd grade winner Nativity Elementary School

KID SAFETY: Grades 4 – 8 Kids are learning: How to identify different types of harm; how to respond assertively and get help; to grow in understanding of personal boundaries; and how to practice safe use of the internet. www.shieldthevulnerable.org log on and review the courses!

Jeremy 6th grade winner Our Lady of Perpetual Help

Dejia 5th grade winner Holy Angels

March 30, 2012

Catholic San Francisco

CP3

Pledge to Heal

Archdiocese of San Francisco

TEEN SAFETY: Grades 9 – 12 Teens are learning: How to identify different types of harm; how to enforce personal boundaries; safe use of the internet; to reject negative media influences; and the importance of respecting the dignity of self and others. www.shieldthevulnerable.org log on and review the courses!

How I Respect Myself By Respecting Others How do you spell j-j-joy?

Why, it’s spelled JOY Jesus for the “J”, my dear Others for the “O”, and Yourself for the “Y” For if you hurt others, It is you who will be hurting And if you help others, Good things shall come Because, who in the long run is happier?

The miser, or The man who gives it all away?

The philanthropist will have more Crying faces at the funeral Smiles on the street And happiness The miser will have Money In the end The money will not bring him Happiness The philanthropist will always be Happy The miser will be hated The philanthropist respected And thus, his respect For others begets the same

Stephanie 10th Grade winner Sts. Peter and Paul Religious Education How I Respect Myself By Respecting Others Respect is a lesson we give Respect is what make us live It sets an example for a good hearted person Without it, you will only worsen I must learn to Respect In life, it is the greatest aspect Respect keeps people in their grounds It is positive and never makes a frown Respect defines who we are It gives courage for someone to go far God gives us this free power Respect is like a growing flower We water it with ‘good actions’ And getting back a positive reaction

Syrena 11th grade winner Sts. Peter and Paul Religious Education ARTICLE 12 of the Charter for the Protection of Children and Young People states: “Dioceses/eparchies are to maintain ‘safe environment’ programs which the diocesan/eparchial bishop deems to be in accord with Catholic moral principles. They are to be conducted cooperatively with parents, civil authorities, educators, and community organizations to provide education and training for children, youth, parents, ministers, educators, volunteers, and others about ways to make and maintain a safe environment for children and young people…” The United States Conference of Catholic Bishops (USCCB)

CP4

Catholic San Francisco

March 30, 2012

TIPS FOR KIDS

My 8 Rules for Safety 1. Before I go anywhere, I always check first with my parents or the person in charge. I tell them where I am going, how I will get there, who will be going with me, and when I’ll be back.

2. I check first for permission from my parents before getting into a car or leaving with anyone even someone I know. I check first before changing plans or accepting money, gifts, or drugs without my parent’s knowledge.

3. It is safer for me to be with other people when going places or playing outside. I always use the “buddy system.”

4. I say NO if someone tries to touch me in ways that make me feel frightened, uncomfortable, or confused. Then I go and tell a grown-up I trust what happened.

5. I know it is not my fault if someone touches me in a way that is not O.K. I don’t have to keep secrets about those touches.

6. I trust my feelings and talk to grown-ups about problems that are too big for me to handle on my own. A lot of people care about me and will listen and believe me. I am not alone.

7. It is never too late to ask for help. I can keep asking until I get the help I need.

8. I am a special person, and I deserve to feel safe. My rules are: o Check first. o Use the “Buddy System.” o Say “NO!”, then go and tell. o Listen to my feelings, and talk with grown-ups I trust about my problems and concerns.

Please use and encourage your schools, day care centers, churches and other organizations to use these “8 Rules for Safety.”

HINTS

FOR

PARENTS

Make sure you know where each of your children is at all times. Know your children’s friends and be clear with your children about the places and homes they may visit.

Make it a rule that your children check in with you when they arrive at or depart from a particular location and when there is a change in plans. You should also let them know when YOU are running late or if your plans have changed so that they can see the rule is for safety purposes and not being used to “check up” on them.

Listen to your children. Pay attention if they tell you that they do not want to be with someone or go somewhere. This may be an indication of more than a personality conflict or lack of interest in the activity or event.

Practice basic safety skills with your children. Make an outing to a mall or a park a “teachable” experience in which your children can practice checking with you, using pay phones, going to the restroom with a friend, and locating the adults who can help if they need assistance.

Remember that allowing your children to wear clothing or carry items in public on which their name is displayed can bring about unwelcome attention from inappropriate people who may be looking for a way to start a conversation with your children.

Remember that there is no substitute for your attention and supervision.

Being available and taking time to really know and listen to your children helps build feelings of safety and security.

“My 8 Rules for Safety” presented courtesy of the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children.

What to do if you suspect abuse Anyone who has reason to believe or suspects that a child has been, or is being, abused should report their suspicions first to civil authorities and then to the Archdiocese’s Victim Assistance Coordinator. Investigation should be left to duly appointed professionals. State law requires persons in certain positions (called “mandated reporters”) to make such reports. Others, (called “ethical reporters”) should do so.

Every allegation will be treated seriously and immediate steps taken to protect the alleged victim(s). These actions will be taken discreetly so as to protect the confidentiality and the rights of both the victim and the accused.

Reporting Instructions by County Cases of alleged abuse in which the abuser and the victim are members of the same household are to be reported to Child Protective Services (CPS), while cases in which the alleged victim and the accused do not share a household should be reported to law enforcement authorities (Sheriff’s Department or City Police). If in doubt, just report to the most convenient agency. They’ll help ensure the message get to the proper place.

MARIN

SAN FRANCISCO

SAN MATEO

Child Protective Services 415.499.7153

Child Protective Services 415.558.2650

Child Protective Services 650.802.7922

Sheriff’s Department 415.479.2311

Police Department 415.553.0123

Sheriff’s Department 650.363.4911

Note: You can also report abuse to your local Police Department.

ARCHDIOCESE VICTIM ASSISTANCE COORDINATOR 415.614.5506