Common Fears about Adoption for Men One of the biggest challenges an individual will face when going through the adoption process to become a parent is fear. There are reservations about whether or not you will be able to love your adopted child with the same kind of intensity you would expect to love your biological child. You may worry about whether or not you’ll be able to establish a healthy relationship and bond with them the way you did with your own parents. Needless to say, the fears you are experiencing are entirely normal and understandable. Many men and women share these worries, but with the help of a trusted adoption agency and getting involved with the adoption community, you’ll find there are many ways to face and overcome these fears. Can I Develop A Loving Relationship With My Adopted Child? Like women in the same situation, a man considering becoming an adoptive father may contemplate whether or not he will be capable of genuinely loving a child he is not genetically related to. The truth is it’s very possible! In fact, it is 100 percent possible to love someone you are not genetically related to. One prime example is your significant other. You two are most certainly not related by blood, yet your wife holds a very special place in your heart. The same idea will apply to the relationship with you and your adopted child.
Strong relationships do not develop as a result of sharing DNA. The way you love and adore family members, you tend to cherish friends and prioritize them as well. The fact that those relationships outside of your immediate family happen is another reason adoption agencies reassure parents who have raised this question themselves. As a potential father, you choose whether or not to love your child. Along with love, you’ll develop paternal skills such as patience and pride. You will find yourself becoming very protective of your child. From reading bedtime stories to changing diapers—you will learn to show your love verbally and non-verbally. Will We Develop A Strong Relationship? The relationship between a child and his parents is very special. It is not one that occurs as a result of blood relation, but instead an emotional bond. Bonding does not always happen instantaneously. In fact, some may take time to develop. This is the case for adoptive or biological families. Like anything worthwhile, it may take time and effort to establish a genuinely strong bond with your child. This bond will begin initially when you first lay eyes on your child, but the potential growth is unpredictable because it occurs through several experiences throughout life. These experiences could range from the day you drop them off for their first day of school up until the day they welcome their own son or daughter into the world. The bond and relationship you and your child will share will never stop evolving and growing.
If you are still a little uneasy or worried about how you will bond with your child, talk to your adoption agency. They can offer tips and insight to help you build a close
relationship with your child. When a couple adopts an infant, agents will recommend cuddling with the baby. This promotes skin-to-skin touching, and it is but a stepping-stone in developing a sense of closeness with your child. For parents who adopt an older child, the case may be different. Instead, you will build your relationship by becoming involved and invested in your child’s interests or hobbies. If your child enjoys sporting events, then perhaps you two will catch a baseball game or play catch out in the yard. Can I Cater to My Child’s Special or Physical Needs? It is very common for prospective parents to fear whether or not they’ll be well equipped to provide quality care for a child who is faced with physical challenges or other special needs. However, it is important to remember that biological parents face this same fear. Therefore, don’t be ashamed if this fear has occurred to you at any point along the adoption process.
Yes, it is true—children with special needs can be very vulnerable. With your help though, you can provide a sense of security and love a child in this situation may require. It seems a little daunting to commit to meeting the needs and medical standards your child might need. However, there are several ways to attain the right kind of help for both you and your child. The special needs you may face include, but aren’t limited to social, medical, physical and developmental challenges. What’s most important is to recognize that you are not alone in this journey. You and your partner, as well as a surrounding support system, will be able to provide the kind
of love and support your child will need. Additionally, you can seek out all the necessary resources needed to prepare yourself for this particular challenge. Ultimately, it is important to keep in mind that the fears you are experiencing have also crossed the minds of parents who have adopted before, and they too have been able to overcome them. With the right help and support from adoption information services, an adoption counselor or other resources offered by your adoption program, you too can find ways to take these fears head on. Adopting a child is an important decision that requires careful consideration. Are you contemplating adoption, or are you already planning to adopt a child? Do you have any idea about how or where to start? Action Adoption at Providence Place of San Antonio, Texas will guide you through the adoption process while making sure all your questions are answered. Contact them today to learn more about adoption and ways to get involved with our organization.