QSaltLake Magazine - December 01, 2007 by QSaltLake Magazine

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ay & Lesb Utah’s G

DECEMBER 1, 2007

GA ZINE  A M T N E M NTERTAIN E & s w ian Ne

ISSUE 91

Buttars, Ruzicka, Gay Leaders Debate Univ. of Utah hosts discussion on workplace discrimination

New Gay Ski Group Hits the Slopes People of all sexual orientations and skills welcome

AIDS Pioneer/UofU Dept. Chair Dies Hate Crime Laws Sought in Montana Gay Assaults

Raul Castro Favors Gays in the Military Gutenburg! The Musical Troy Williams Survives ‘Heroes’ Marathon The Gay Agenda Qdoku, Comics

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Transgender Restroom Squabble Settled

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NO, BUT I AM!

I’m not gay!

A Regional Premiere by Scott Brown & Anthony King Through December 30 @ the Rose A fucked wackyup show about about Johann Gutenberg, Johann Gutenberg, inveninventor of thepress. printing Sortmeets of. Spinal Tap tor of the printing Sort of.press. Guffman. Spinal meets SNL meets Waiting Waiting for for Guffman. SNL Tapmeets Tickets at 355-ARTS or planbtheatre.org

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“A Welcome Addition for the Holidays” Salt Lake Tribune

“Laugh-Out-Loud hilarious” Deseret Morning News

Editor-in-Chief

Michael Aaron

Assistant Editor

JoSelle Vanderhooft Arts Editor

Tony Hobday COPY Editor

Jennifer Morgan

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Tony Hobday

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Our 25th Annual Holiday Concert is FREE TO THE PUBLIC as a Thank You for 25 Years of Support. All we ask is for you to bring a food or toiletry item for the Utah Food Bank or the Utah AIDS Foundation Food Bank. Friday and Saturday, Dec. 7 and 8, 7:30pm at the First Baptist Church, 777 S. 1300 E., Salt Lake City Sunday, Dec. 9, 5:00pm at the St Luke’s Episcopal Church, 4595 N Silver Springs Drive, Park City SaltLakeMensChoir.org

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World News

By Rex Wockner

Daughter: Raúl Castro Supports Gays in the Military Raúl Castro, who is leading Cuba during his brother Fidel’s lengthy illness, supports gays serving openly in the military, says his daughter, Mariela Castro Espín, director of the island’s National Center for Sex Education, CENESEX. Castro Espín was asked about “gays in the military” in a Nov. 4 interview with the Buenos Aires daily newspaper Clarín. “I always say where there’s humanity there’s diversity, and in the military world there are gays also, but, of course, they are careful because it’s a milieu that doesn’t accept them,” Castro Espín said. “It is still considered that the conditions to make changes do not exist.” “Well, my dad, the minister of the Revolutionary Armed Forces, says to me: ‘Look, I think that to the extent the population changes, the army will change, because the population is in the army also. Go on working, raising awareness, doing things, changing Cuban society, and you’ll change everything else, including our institutions.’” Castro Espín said she has taken a direct interest in gay issues since 2004. “A group of more than 40 cross-dressers and transsexuals from Havana came to see me at CENESEX to let me know about the difficulties they were having with the police in the central La Rampa zone, where they were meeting and still meet,” she said. “The police were arbitrarily arresting them and then letting them go without charges, just because people were complaining [about them].” Three years from now, Cuba is set to begin offering sex-change surgery. “There are 27 transsexuals waiting for the operation [and] the medical team is being trained,” Castro Espín said. “As soon as it’s ready ... they will start to operate.” Castro Espín also told Clarín that 80 percent of people with HIV in Cuba are

men, and 85 percent of those are men who have sex with men, “often in connection with prostitution.” She also mentioned that she wants to visit the United States “but they won’t give us a visa.”

Buenos Aires Pride.

Wockner News photo by Mariano Lago

25,000 March at Buenos Aires Pride Fidel and Raúl Castro

GETTY IMAGES

“I was there once and I’ve been invited back twice since then, but they didn’t give it to me,” she said. “I asked for it and they didn’t respond ... [But] when they want, professional Americans come [to Cuba] via a third country and we have excellent relations and excellent e-mail contact.”

Swedish Christian School Told to Stop ‘Sin’ Teaching Sweden’s National Agency for Education says a private Christian school’s teaching that homosexuality is sinful violates the national curriculum’s antidiscrimination policy. The Andreas Gymnasium School has until Nov. 30 to demonstrate how it will comply with the determination. The Swedish national gay group RFSL (its official name is now just initials) complained to the agency after hearing the school’s headmaster call homosexuality “sinful” on a television broadcast.

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Some 25,000 people marched in Buenos Aires’ 16th gay pride parade Nov. 17 — from the Plaza de Mayo (site of Eva Perón’s famous speech on the balcony of the Casa Rosada) up Avenida de Mayo to the Plaza de los Dos Congresos. This year’s theme was “Our Celebration Is a Demand: Freedom, Equality, Diversity.”

Organizers and marchers called for legalization of same-sex marriage, not just civil unions, which are available in the capital city, and for new laws against discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity. Incoming President Cristina Kirchner reportedly has indicated support for a proposed national civil-union law.

Nicaragua’s Sodomy Ban Disappears

Hungarian Government Proposes Registered-Partnership Law

Nicaragua’s sodomy ban is history. A rewrite of the nation’s Penal Code, which takes effect in March, simply left the ban out. “We are not wanting to moralize,” explained José Pallaís, president of the National Assembly’s Justice and Legal Issues Committee. “The state should not be regulating conduct or giving moral indicators of how citizens should behave. “We are not making a code of the Catholic Church here,” he said. “We are making a democratic code under modern principles and principles of legality.” Old Penal Code Article 204 stated: “Anyone who induces, promotes, propagandizes or practices in scandalous form sexual intercourse between persons of the same sex commits the crime of sodomy [and] will incur a penalty of one to three years in prison.” At least three nations in Central or South America continue to ban gay sex — Belize, Guyana and Panama — along with several Caribbean islands, including Barbados, Dominica, Grenada, Jamaica, Saint Kitts and Nevis, Saint Lucia, Saint Vincent and the Grenadines, and Trinidad and Tobago. Ten of the countries are former British colonies. The International Lesbian and Gay Association says gay sex also remains illegal in Antigua and Barbuda, but Amnesty International USA and other sources report it is legal. At the time of this column’s deadline, the actual situation could not be determined. (A September item in this column failed to note the sodomy bans in Belize, Dominica, Panama, Saint Vincent and the Grenadines as well as the conflicting information regarding Antigua and Barbuda.)

After the Hungarian Parliament’s human-rights committee refused to open debate on a bill to allow same-sex marriage, the government has submitted a proposal to create registered partnerships for gay and straight couples. The measure would extend spousal rights in the areas of inheritance, social benefits and use of common property. Gay activists, who predict the bill almost certainly will pass, plan to continue the push for access to full marriage in order to gain all the rights of matrimony and because separate schemes do not create true equality, they said.

Iranian’s Sodomy Death Sentence Lifted Following an international outcry by activists, a 21-year-old Iranian man sentenced to hang for allegedly committing sodomy and rape when he was 13 years old saw his sentence commuted Nov. 14. Ayatollah Syed Mahmoud Hashemi Shahroudi, the nation’s chief justice, nullified the death sentence of Makvan Mouloodzadeh, apparently agreeing with Mouloodzadeh’s lawyer that evidence of the alleged crimes was lacking and that numerous elements of the case violated proper procedure. Mouloodzadeh remains jailed in the city of Kermanshah and the case will be returned to a local court for a retrial. “The only reason this young man managed to escape is that he had a relative in Germany that knew someone in Iran and that someone was a reporter and she was brave enough to make a fuss about it,” said Hossein Alizadeh, communications director of the International Gay and Lesbian Human Rights Commission and a gay Iranian who won asylum in the United States based on Iran’s treatment of gay people.

National News

Is a Male Escort Responsible for Trent Lott’s Resignation? by Bryan Ochalla

Is Mississippi Senator Trent Lott resigning because the news that he’s been involved with a male escort is about to break? That’s what the folks over at BigHeadDC.com are implying. According to an article posted to the site yesterday, the word on the street is that the 66-year-old Lott, who is married (to a woman), has been known to call on the services of Benjamin Nicholas, “a twenty-something boy-next-door type with reddish blond hair and a brilliantly white smile.” Not one to kiss and tell, Nicolas told Big Head DC in an e-mail yesterday that “Trent is going through his fair share of scrutiny right now and I don’t want to add to it. All I can say at this point is no comment. It’s the professional thing for me to do.” Nicholas changed his tune somewhat in a subsequent communiqué that followed later in the day. “Here’s my public comment, on-the-record: Sen. Lott and I have no current affiliation with one another,” he said. “I’m sure he would appreciate no further scrutiny.” Big Head DC claims to have “e-mail and other records” that confirm that Lott and Nicolas have met on at least two occasions. Lott announced early yesterday that he will step down from his seat by the end of the year. He is the sixth incumbent Republican senator to retire before

the 2008 election. “It’s time to do something else,” the 66-year-old said during a press conference in Pascagoula, Miss. “I don’t know what the future holds. A lot of options, hopefully, will be available.” Lott’s 35year career turned into a roller coaster ride the past decade. Although he served as Senate majority leader from San Antonio, Texas escort 1996 to 2002, Benjamin Nicholas he resigned from that post over a remark some interpreted as support for segregation. Following last year’s elections, Lott regained a leadership role within the Republican party when he was named whip, the No. 2 job behind minority leader Mitch McConnell. According to a Bloomberg report, Lott said he began thinking about retiring in August because he wanted to leave on a positive note. “There’s no malice, no anger,” he added. “There’s nothing but happiness and pride at the job that I’ve been allowed to do by the people of Mississippi and by my colleagues in the House and Senate.”

Democratic Presidential Candidates Talk About Tossing ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ By Chrys Hudson

and transgender community for 14 years–how they plan to dismantle ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,’” HRC President Joe Solmonese said in a release on Monday. “Public opinion polls show that Americans do not support this discriminatory policy, which has served only to dishonor the brave, patriotic service of 12,000 men and women.” HRC also is launching an advertising campaign around the candidates’ statements, encouraging the LGBT community to visit www.hrcbackstory.org and learn more about where candidates stand on the issue of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.” HRC will also mark the anniversary of the policy’s signing by participating in the “12,000 Flags for 12,000 Patriots” display on the National Mall. In partnership with Servicemembers United (formerly Call to Duty), Log Cabin Republicans, Servicemembers Legal Defense Network and Liberty Education Forum, HRC will recognize the 12,000 men and women kicked out of the military since the signing of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.” The tribute will begin on Friday, Nov. 30 and continue through Sunday, Dec. 2.

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In conjunction with the 14th anniversary of the signing of the military policy banning gays and lesbians from serving openly in the military, the Human Rights Campaign has asked the leading Democratic presidential hopefuls, “If you are elected President, what concrete steps would you take to overturn ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell?’” Each day this week, one statement will be posted on the HRC Back Story blog at www.hrcbackstory.org. Former Senator John Edwards started things off on Monday by saying, “gay men and women have continually served our country with honor and bravery and we should honor their commitment and never turn away anyone who is willing to serve their country because of their sexual orientation.” Statements from Senators Joe Biden, Hillary Clinton, Chris Dodd, Barack Obama and Governor Bill Richardson will be posted today through Saturday. “Over the course of the next six days, those vying to be our nation’s next president will answer a question that has concerned the gay, lesbian, bisexual

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Regional News Arizona Bar Owner, Transwoman Reach Restroom Settlement BY JOSELLE VANDERHOOFT

Tucson, Ariz. – A year-long dispute centering around transgender accessibility to a Tucson, Ariz. nightclub’s bathroom ended earlier this month when the club’s owner agreed to designate one restroom stall as unisex. Michele de LaFreniere, a transgender woman and a member of the Scottsdale Human Relations Commission and Arizona Transgender Alliance, filed a sex discrimination suit against Tom Anderson, owner of Anderson’s Fifth Estate, last year after Anderson barred her and five other transgender patrons from the club after female patrons complained that “men in dresses” were using the women’s restroom, and standing up to urinate. At the time, Anderson said he saw no other way to resolve the situation and keep the transgender patrons safe. Previous attempts by Equality Arizona to settle the dispute had failed. Although Anderson said he would install a

single-stall bathroom unit on Oct. 30, de LaFreniere said she would not drop her complaint unless Anderson allowed her and other banned transgender patrons back into the night club. “It still doesn’t address the issue of the original discrimination,” she told The Arizona Republic at the time. De LaFreniere dropped her civil rights suit on Nov. 13 after Anderson let her patron the club again. Anderson said that he was relieved to end the dispute. “It cost me about $5 for a (bathroom) sign, and add many more zeroes to that for what I owe my attorney,” he said, adding that the dispute was never about discrimination. “We’ve never been about barring anybody or blocking anybody from coming in,” he said. De LaFreniere also said she was relieved that the conflict has ended. “It was hard on both parties,” she said.

Casper Wyoming Readies for World AIDS Day Casper, Wyo. is preparing for four days of events commemorating World AIDS Day. Organizers are hoping to increase awareness of the disease. “World AIDS Day is designed to focus attention and generate revenue for prevention, care and treatment for persons at risk and living with HIV/AIDS,” said Rob Johnston, HIV prevention program manager with the Wyoming Department of Health. The Wyoming Department of Health reports that 43 percent of AIDS cases in the 13- to 19-year-old age group are female. “I think it’s important for people to realize in Wyoming that almost 50 percent of our cases are among heterosexuals,” Johnston told the Star-Tribune. “It’s not a gay disease and our cases among women are rising.” “It’s important for people to realize that the AIDS epidemic is serious. We have lost more people to AIDS than anything since the bubonic plague,” Johnston said. “When you are looking at something that is impacting the world, there is nothing like this.” Lynnette Kline, the community outreach coordinator for the Community Health Center of Central Wyoming says that HIV and AIDS affects everyone. “A lot of people still think, ‘Oh, you have AIDS, it’s your fault.’ They don’t think it will ever affect them,” Kline said. “It’s everyone’s problem now, not just men’s.” Though Wyoming has a relatively small number of cases — 150 — the state is seeing an increase in new infections, according to Stephanie Moles, executive director of The Woman’s Heart. The Women’s Heart assists in alcohol and drug recovery. They will display a section of The Names Project AIDS Quilt

in the windows of their downtown Casper office through the week. Another section of the AIDS Quilt will be at the Community Health Center of Central Wyoming. “It’s not the number of AIDS cases right now that is scary,” Moles said. “It’s how fast those numbers are growing that you should be scared of.” The nonprofit organization will also be showing the 1993 Oscar-winning movie Philadelphia, about a man struggling with AIDS. The Community Health Center will also distribute AIDS ribbons for their physicians, nurses and patients to wear and offer a panel of HIV patients, according to Kline. As she glued pieces of red ribbon together to form an AIDS pin, Kline said the most important thing is to get information about AIDS into the community. “There are a lot of people with the idea that if you don’t know you have it, you don’t have it, and that is dangerous. We know we can’t fix everything, but we are making some kind of a difference,” Outreach Coordinator for The Woman’s Heart, Adrienne Price, said. Even if AIDS isn’t affecting you or your family, Johnston said Wyoming communities still need to pay attention. “We encourage all Wyoming residents to know their HIV status,” Johnston said. Testing sites are located throughout the state, and in most cases, HIV testing and counseling is available at low or no cost to the public. “While there is no cure for HIV, current medications can help many people infected with the virus live longer and healthier lives,” Johnston said.

Assault victim Jess Keith speaks at a community rally

Mont. Gay Man, Lesbian Assaulted, City Rallies for Hate Crimes Protections MISSOULA, MONT. – Two anti-gay attacks in Missoula, Mont., home to the University of Montana, on Saturday, Nov. 3 shocked the community and led to calls for the state’s hate crimes legislation to be revised. In one of the attacks, a 22-year-old male UM student was assaulted on campus by four college-age men at 2:30 a.m. The victim, whose name has not been released pending a police investigation, was pushed to the ground and repeatedly kicked in the head and chest while his attackers yelled anti-gay slurs, according to The Montana Kaimin, the university’s newspaper. On the same night, a 29-year-old woman was attacked outside the Missoula Public Library by four women after a Montana Grizzly football game. Jess Keith said she saw one of the women throwing up in the bathroom and offered to bring her some water. “They looked me up and down,” she said. “Then one of the girls called me a dyke and told me to use the men’s room.” When Keith left for a downtown club, the women attacked her in the library’s parking lot. “It was clear they were out looking for me,” Keith said. “I heard one of them say, ‘There she is,’ and then they piled out of the car and one of them punched me in the face.” The women continued kicking Keith after she fell, and they stole her wallet before driving away. Although Keith was not seriously injured in the attack, she said she is concerned that Montana’s current hate

crimes statute does not include sexual orientation. “You know people are protected in terms of a hate crime in other places — but not here in Montana, and it doesn’t make any sense why,” she told Montana’s News Station. “If people don’t talk about it and get the word out — people don’t think it happens in Missoula. They have all of my info ... I mean are they going to attack again, are they going to try and retaliate? I feel like had I been a straight person, walking into that bathroom and offered some water, it probably would have been accepted.” Earlier this year, state Sen. Carol Juneau, D-Browning, sponsored a bill that would have added gender, disability and sexual orientation to Montana’s current hate crimes statue. The bill was tabled in committee after failing on a 7-5 vote. Following the attacks, three dozen Missoula organizations including the UM LAMBDA Alliance, Forward Montana, Western Montana Gay and Lesbian Community Center in Missoula and the city’s police department organized a community rally on Nov. 26. The rally featured several speakers, including Missoula Mayor John Engenstate and Sen. Christine Kauffman, D-Helena, who has also proposed bills that would amend Montana law to include sexual orientation in hate crime laws. Speakers encouraged people at the rally to advocate for the passage of inclusive hate crime legislation. “Everyone should step forward,” said County Commissioner Jean Curtiss. “Not just gays and lesbians. We are all neighbors.”

‘Romney for President’ Ads Appear on Gay.com Being the presidential hopeful with the heaviest Web advertising presence can be a difficult position to be in — sometimes it means your campaign ads will show up in unexpected places. Republican candidate Mitt Romney is finding that out the hard way, according to a recent article in the New York Times. Apparently, banner ads saying “Mitt Romney for President-Vote Team Mitt!” appeared on Gay.com for two days this past August-appearing at least 32,000 times. Romney’s aides claimed to not know about the ads when contacted by the newspaper, which received its infor-

mation from the Nielsen Online AdRelevance monitoring service. The same report indicated thousands of “Romney for President” ads also have appeared on FanFiction.net, a site used by those who like to write stories about their favorite fictional characters (some of which involve X-rated situations between the likes of Harry Potter and Hermione Granger). Romney’s aides told the New York Times campaign ads are not supposed to appear on dating or “alternative lifestyle” sites, nor should they appear on sites with pornographic images, gambling or left-leaning political content.

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Local News

Dixie College Pride Flag Stolen

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A rainbow-striped pride flag put out to welcome a visiting gay senator was stolen from the Dixie State College campus on Nov. 19. Members of the school’s diversity club and pride club, an organization for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender students and their straight allies, put the flag up to welcome state Sen. Scott McCoy. McCoy had come to the school to speak with students, faculty and residents about creating a Southern Utah chapter of the Stonewall Democrats, an organization for gay and lesbian Democrats. The flag, which resembled the American flag with rainbow stripes in place of the red and white, was taken away during McCoy’s speech. Diversity club and pride club members said the theft was disturbing. “This is not just about acceptance, but about toleration for all,” said pride club president Doug Gubler told the Salt Lake Tribune. Dixie State President Lee Caldwell called the theft a misunderstanding. According to him, a male student took the flag away because he thought it was mocking Old Glory. “He had no clue it was anything other

than someone making fun of the U.S. flag,” Caldwell told the Salt Lake Tribune. “It was a case of extreme naiveté.” Chris McArdle, President and Pride director of Southern Utah Pride Association, Inc., the organization responsible for the annual Southern Utah Pride at Zion festival, said he told school officials that the student needed to understand the severity of his actions. “I wanted to make sure the student understood the repercussions of that,” said McArdle, who also played a major part in arranging McCoy’s visit. “It could be classified as a hate crime, certainly as vandalism.” He added that while school officials did not tell him how they addressed the flag’s theft, they nonetheless assured him that they addressed the matter in a “positive way.” At the time, McArdle said he also told school officials that he and other members of Southern Utah’s gay community would be “happy to help” address issues of tolerance and diversity at the university campus. Vice president for student services Frank Lojko eventually found the stolen flag.

E V E S ’ R A E Y W NE December G N I N N A L P STARTegin taking reservations in We will b Y T R A P E V E S A M T S I R H C L A ANNU — Of course Santa will be there G Dec. 24 N I V I G S K N A TH g n i k a m r o f S THANK GE Success IRELESS W E E R F Such a HU INTERNET

Buttars, Ruzicka and Gay Leaders Debate Workplace Discrimination By Joselle Vanderhooft

identity accounted for five lawsuits out of every 10,000 people â&#x20AC;&#x201D; a number on par with every other group covered by nondiscrimination laws. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Everyone has a sexual orientation, a race, a gender identity and a sex,â&#x20AC;? he said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Two of those are protected, the other two are not.â&#x20AC;? He also argued that a healthy economy was dependent on fairness in the workplace, and in â&#x20AC;&#x153;welcoming people on the margins.â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Anti-gay discrimination depresses the economy,â&#x20AC;? he said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;When employees see a good worker get fired, the disparity between [the firing] and hard work causes confusion and worry.â&#x20AC;? Ruzicka, however, said that the hypothetical law might take the concept of workplace discrimination too far. â&#x20AC;&#x153;What is the definition of discrimination regarding sexual orientation and identity? How far will that go? If someone is reading a Bible at work and the Bible says [homosexuality] is wrong, will that count?â&#x20AC;? she asked. She also said that such a law could lead to gay employees alleging discrimination if their places of employment didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t offer benefits to same-sex partners â&#x20AC;&#x201D; something they do not have to do according to Amendment 3, the amendment to the state constitution that sought to define marriage as the union between a man and a woman. Utah voters overwhelmingly passed Amendment 3 in 2004. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We shouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t pass this [law] because all people enjoy equality under the law,â&#x20AC;?

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AIDS Pioneer, Former U. Dept. Head Dies Dr. Merle A. Sande, a leading infectiousdiseases expert whose foresight of the threat posed by AIDS led to the development of basic patient handling protocols, died on Nov. 14 at his home in Seattle. The cause was multiple myeloma, his family said. He was 68. In 1981, while chief of medical services at San Francisco General Hospital, Dr. Sande and his colleagues began to note an ominous incidence of young men being admitted with pneumonia, cancers and other serious illnesses, some of which defied easy diagnosis. One patient, a young gay man, had contracted a lethal case of toxoplasmosis, a parasitic disease sometimes passed from cats to humans but unusual in a patient with a healthy immune system. Dr. Sande and others then noted the appearance of pneumocystis â&#x20AC;&#x201D; a form of pneumonia more commonly found in malnourished children or patients with weakened immune systems â&#x20AC;&#x201D; in a group of gay male patients in Los Angeles. Facing an influx of similarly distressed patients, Dr. Sande realized that San Francisco was in the opening stages of an epidemic, the health crisis now known as AIDS, or acquired immune deficiency syndrome. He began to pose fundamental questions about effective practices for care of the sick and protection of medical staffs. In 1983, he argued successfully for the opening of a ward in San Francisco General for AIDS patients and also helped found an outpatient AIDS clinic there. With Dr. Julie L. Gerberding, Dr. Paul A. Volberding and others, Dr. Sande developed what became known as the â&#x20AC;&#x153;San

Francisco modelâ&#x20AC;? for AIDS treatments. It was â&#x20AC;&#x153;a comprehensive and rational approach on how care is delivered that contrasted greatly with the fear and paranoia that prevailed at the time,â&#x20AC;? said Dr. Warner C. Greene, a professor of medicine, microbiology and immunology who was a colleague of Dr. Sande at the University of California, San Francisco. Dr. Greene, who is also director of the Gladstone Institute of Virology and Immunology, a leading AIDS research center affiliated with the university, said the model addressed a need for infection-control guidelines, clinical studies and research financing. It became a template for AIDS centers nationwide. Dr. Sande himself advised San Francisco officials and the California Department of Health Services on controlling the disease and helped direct $100 million in public money for AIDS research. He helped found the Gladstone Institute in 1992 and contributed throughout the 1990s to national panels evaluating pharmaceutical AIDS therapies like the use of AZT in the early stages of infection. He also advised public health officials on the potential of an AIDS prevention vaccine, which has yet to be developed. A consuming interest became the treatment of the disease in Africa, where he helped to found the Infectious Diseases Institute at the Makerere College of Health Sciences in Kampala, Uganda. The institute, which opened in 2004, trains doctors and nurses from 26 African countries and operates a clinic that treats about 10,000 AIDS patients, Dr. Greene said.

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The University of Utahâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Debate Team and Department of Communication hosted a parliamentary debate and panel discussion on anti-gay discrimination in the workplace on the night of Thursday, Nov. 15. The debate team opened the evening with an hour-long debate on the resolution: â&#x20AC;&#x153;Should the state of Utah pass legislation establishing protections from discrimination regarding sexual orientation and identity in the workplace?â&#x20AC;? University of Utah students Anastasia Neidrich and Chrissy Hayes argued in favor of the resolution. They argued that forbidding workplace discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity would lead to an increased quality of life for Utahâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender population and a boost in Utahâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s economy because gays would feel welcome to visit the state. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Utah, as well as America, has the moral obligation to work against discrimination,â&#x20AC;? said Hayes, citing previous moves by national and state governments to eliminate discrimination based on race, sex and religion. The opposition team of Nina Hall and Danielle Hughes maintained that legislation targeting anti-gay and transgender workplace discrimination would encourage businesses who disagreed with the law to leave the state, and take legislative time and money away from pressing topics like education and the high numbers of uninsured Utahns. They also said such legislation would compromise Utahâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s values, particularly as the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (which opposes gay sex and same-sex marriage) is the stateâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s largest employer. After the debate, audience members were asked to vote for the winning team based only on arguments they presented. The affirmative team won by a two-thirds majority, or 99 to 47 audience votes. The second half of the evening consisted of a panel discussion that expounded on the debateâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s resolution. Its members consisted of Sen. Chris Buttars, R-West Jordan; Rep. Christine Johnson, D-Salt Lake City; Gayle Ruzicka, president of the Utah Eagle Forum; and Will Carlson, manager of public policy for Equality Utah. Each panelist was allowed eight minutes to speak on his or her position. Johnson said that the government must sometimes pass laws to forbid discrimination because America has historically been slow to end discrimination against minority groups. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Historically [movements to end discrimination] succeed after decades sometimes, and often it comes as a surprise to the majority that discrimination even exists,â&#x20AC;? she said. Although Buttars agreed with Johnson that gays should not be discriminated against, he called the hypothetical proposal â&#x20AC;&#x153;another way to bring about Affirmative Actionâ&#x20AC;? and a move to push aside â&#x20AC;&#x153;200 years of American moral valuesâ&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x201D; a move that would â&#x20AC;&#x153;change America for the worse.â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re going to have a wave of lawsuits on both sides,â&#x20AC;? he said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;If I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t get hired and Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m a gay, I can sue [based on that].â&#x20AC;? Responding to Buttars, Carlson said that workplace discrimination lawsuits based on sexual orientation or gender

she said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Gays are single and get the same benefits as singles do.â&#x20AC;? In her rebuttal, Johnson said that a law to ban workplace discrimination against gays and transgender people would not apply to small businesses and religious organizations, and would not require domestic partnership benefits to be granted. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We need to demystify the gay agenda, and here it is: For members of the gay community to go to work, support our families and be productive members of society,â&#x20AC;? she said to applause. After their speeches, the panelists fielded questions from the audience, which included several gays, lesbians, bisexuals and transgender people including Dr. Marci Bowers, one of the top gender reassignment surgeons in the country. Bowers, who was in town to speak at the Utah Pride Center for Transgender Awareness Month, told Buttars and Ruzicka about being fired from her job at a clinic after transitioning from a man to a woman. â&#x20AC;&#x153;How would you explain to my children why I lost my job after being the clinicâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s most favored physician and the highest earner?â&#x20AC;? she asked. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a tough one,â&#x20AC;? Buttars said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know what Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d say but I have total empathy for you.â&#x20AC;? Ruzicka told Bowers that her own children had been subject to discrimination â&#x20AC;&#x201D; including employment discrimination â&#x20AC;&#x201D; because of their shared last name. She told Bowers that while she â&#x20AC;&#x153;didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t expect the legislature to pass laws and make things OKâ&#x20AC;? for them, she said overcoming such discrimination was â&#x20AC;&#x153;lifeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s lesson.â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;You tell your childen what happened to you and how you overcame it,â&#x20AC;? she said.

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Local News

SnowBall to BeneďŹ t People With AIDS BY JOSELLE VANDERHOOFT

The Royal Court of the Golden Spike Empire will hold its annual SnowBall, a dance and drag show to directly benefit people in Utah living with AIDS, on Dec. 9 at the Rose Wagner Performing Arts Center. Each year the organization raises money that goes to people with HIV and AIDS in Utah in the form of $100 checks given during the holiday season. The money can be used for any purpose the recipient chooses. The theme for this yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s dance is â&#x20AC;&#x153;Wish â&#x20AC;Ś A Masquerade Ball.â&#x20AC;? The idea to center this yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s event around wishes came to Prince Royale 32 Thomas Shaylee when he misheard the title of fellow organizer Princess Royale 32 Systeen Chapelleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s favorite Christmas song. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We were going through Christmas songs and movies, and Systeen said that her favorite song was â&#x20AC;&#x153;Grown Up Christmas List.â&#x20AC;? I thought she said â&#x20AC;&#x153;Grown Up Christmas Wish,â&#x20AC;? so I thought we could do the ball around wishes,â&#x20AC;? said Shaylee. As part of the wish theme, RCGSE members and volunteers will decorate the Rose Wagnerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Black Box Theatre in nighttime colors, such as blue, purple, silver and black. Also, the theaterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sophisticated lighting system will be used to heighten the eveningâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s drama and mystery. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Now picture that with the masks as being the only brightly-colored things, in colors like red, pinks and green,â&#x20AC;? said Chapelle. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The idea is to make it like wishing upon a star,â&#x20AC;? added Shaylee. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s also going to be centered around the Venetian style of masquerade â&#x20AC;&#x201D; a bit more classy, as opposed to [Mardi Gras] beads.â&#x20AC;? The theaterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s doors will open at 4:00 p.m. with a dinner served at 5:00 p.m. According to Chapelle, the meal will be â&#x20AC;&#x153;traditional Americanâ&#x20AC;? offerings like turkey, ham, potatoes and a wide selection of desserts. Adults 21 and over can also order from an open bar. The drag performance following at 6:00 p.m. will be the Courtâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;last ditchâ&#x20AC;? effort to raise money for their Christmas PWA fund. To help raise money for this fund, the evening will include a silent auction across from the bar featuring a number of items including gift baskets and adult novelties from local merchants. During the evening, attendees can also place cash and personal check donations in baskets located near the stage. At press time, the PWA Christmas fund stood at $5,339. Last year, the Court raised $11,000 to benefit people with AIDS living in Utah. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We really hope we can get as much as we can so everyone on our list can be taken care of,â&#x20AC;? said Chapelle. Two additional events will precede this yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s SnowBall â&#x20AC;&#x201D; a Christmas drag show for in-town performers at the Paper Moon on Dec. 7 and a meet-and-greet for locals and out-of-town performers at the Trapp Door on Dec. 8. Both events will start at 9:00 p.m. and the proceeds from each will go to the PWA Christmas fund

as well. According to Shaylee, performers from Denver, Las Vegas and Boise are scheduled to attend the Trapp Door mixer, including current monarchs from the Imperial Sovereign Gem Court of Idaho Emperor 30 Paris DelavontĂŠ Hilton Starr and Empress 30 Vanity Starr St. James and Gem Empress 28 Chaise Manhattan. Although the show will include guests from out of town, Shaylee was quick to stress that locals who want to do drag can get up on stage, especially if they want to perform and never have before. â&#x20AC;&#x153;You donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have to be a member of the Court to perform,â&#x20AC;? he said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We welcome that. Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re not going to turn anyone away.â&#x20AC;? Although the SnowBallâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s theme changes yearly, the amount of time members of the Court, volunteers and especially the reigning Prince and Princess put into making the evening a success never changes. Laughing, Chapelle said that putting the ball together has become her social life over the past few months. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s quite a responsibility, but itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s very fulfilling,â&#x20AC;? she said. And often, the real reward comes after the streamers and glitter have been swept away. Of all the people with AIDS who received financial help after last yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ball, one story particularly stands out to Chapelle. One year a Prince and Princess visited a house to deliver a check, and an unexpected person answered the door. â&#x20AC;&#x153;This little girl came running outside and gave them each a hug. She said she was going to use her money to get presents for her siblings,â&#x20AC;? Chapelle related. â&#x20AC;&#x153;To see someone that young suffering from AIDS, and someone who was using that money so selflessly â&#x20AC;Ś well, the Prince and Princess had to take a twohour break so they could stop crying.â&#x20AC;? Tickets for Wish â&#x20AC;Ś A Masquerade Ball are $20 and available at the door or through ArtTix box offices. To mail a donation to the PWA Christmas fund, send check or well-concealed cash to The Royal Court of the Golden Spike Empire, P.O. Box 11793, Salt Lake City UT 84147. For more information about the Royal Court of the Golden Spike Empire and its charitable work, visit rcgse.org. Q

Fabulous Fun Bus to Wendover

On Sunday, Dec. 2 outspoken Slut and QSaltLake columnist Ruby Ridge will host the newspaperâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Fabulous Fun Bus to West Wendover, Nevada. This is always a great time. Bingo, prizes, jello shooters, buffet, cash back and more. Call 649-6663 for tickets. More information at gaywendover.com or see the ad on page 18.

New Gay Ski Group Hits the Slopes When Dana Clark settled in Salt Lake City last year, he expected to find a gay ski group in the state claiming to have the Greatest Snow on Earth. He searched high and low, but by the time the great snow covered the mountains, the former Vermont resident hadnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t found one. His solution? Start his own group. â&#x20AC;&#x153;When I couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t find a group at the Pride Center, I decided to see what I could do about it,â&#x20AC;? he said. The following summer, Clark discussed forming a gay ski group with friends from the Lambda Hiking Club who also wanted to hit the slopes after the hiking seasonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s end. In October, Ski Out Utah, their brainchild, was born. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I had such a great time with them at the hiking club, that itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s nice to have a ski group for the winter,â&#x20AC;? said Clark. Along with the hiking club, the group also shares some members with the Queer Utah Aquatic Club, who hold an annual Ski and Swim event over Presidentâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Day Weekend. Although Clark and the other Ski Out Utah leaders are still planning their events for the 2007-08 ski season (typically Dec. through Mar.), they already have a tentative weekly schedule, including skiing and snowboarding on Sundays and Wednesdays, cross country skiing on the second Saturday of each month, and snowshoeing on the fourth Saturday. They also hope to include ice skating and potlucks on their list of events. A meet and greet with a Los Angeles-based gay ski group has also been planned for Jan. 10 at Kristaufâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Martini Bar in Park City (825 South Main Street, under the stairwell). â&#x20AC;&#x153;But we donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t want to burn ourselves out,â&#x20AC;? Clark said. People who have never strapped on

skis neednâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t worry about burning themselves out on the slopes trying to keep up with more advanced skiers. Although Ski Out Utah boasts a litany of experienced skiers and professional skiing instructors, Clark stressed that skiers of all skill levels are encouraged to join them this winter, particularly beginners. As an added incentive, Clark said the group hopes to devote one weekend each month

to a beginner-level class. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re hoping that members of each skill level can get a big enough group to hang out with each other,â&#x20AC;? he said. Although the group has a gay-centric name, Clark encourages people of all sexual orientations and gender identities to become Ski Out Utah members. He added that he would especially like to see more women join up, to balance out the groupâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s now-mostly male membership. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I think itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d be fun for this to be the â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;inâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; ski club in the state,â&#x20AC;? he said. Eventually, organizers also hope to hold a weekend event in Park City for members of gay ski groups from all over the country. â&#x20AC;&#x153;But thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s looking towards the future,â&#x20AC;? said Clark. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The goal for now is to hang out, make new friends, and improve our skiing while having fun.â&#x20AC;? For more information and for regular updates visit Ski Out Utahâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Web site at skioututah.com. The group also maintains a Yahoo group at groups.yahoo.com/group/ skioututah/.

PWACU Poinsettia Sales Break Record BY JOSELLE VANDERHOOFT

attractive six inch pot. They are locally grown and generously provided to PWACU at cost through Glover Nursery. They are available for $10 per plant or $75 for eight. While deliveries to locations in the Salt Lake Valley require no minimum order, deliveries to Davis, Summit, Tooele and Utah Counties require a minimum order of eight plants. Although this has been the best year ever for the fund raiser, Johnson still hopes to do better. Ultimately, she wants to send 1,200 of the festive plants to homes and businesses throughout the state. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Everyone is gonna buy a poinsettia anyway, so why not turn it into a donation?â&#x20AC;? she said. To order call 484-2205 before Dec. 7.

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Utah Leaders Endorse Hillary Clinton Ten Utah community leaders have announced their endorsement of Hillary Clinton, including State Rep. Jackie Biskupski. In addition to Biskupski, endorsements came from Salt Lake County Councilmembers Randy Horiuchi, Jenny Wilson and Joe Hatch; former Utah Democratic Party Chair Donald Dunn, retired state senators Karen Hale and Blaze Wharton; retired Congresswoman Karen Shepherd; DNC Committee Member Helen Langan; and former Salt Lake County Party Chair Nichole Adams Dunn.

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Hillary has the ability to begin rebuilding our image around the world and tackling our challenges at home from her first day in the White House,â&#x20AC;? said former Utah Democratic Party Chair Donald K. Dunn. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Hillary Clintonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s strength and experience make her uniquely qualified to be President and create the change this country needs,â&#x20AC;? said former State Senator Karen Hale. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m honored to have the support of these respected community leaders,â&#x20AC;? Clinton said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;With their help, weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll bring our message of change across Utah.â&#x20AC;?

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The People with AIDS Coalition of Utahâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s annual poinsettia fund raiser broke a new record in its three-year history and there is still time to order more. At press time, the annual fund raiser had sold 1,038 plants â&#x20AC;&#x201C; up from last yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s total of 776 â&#x20AC;&#x201C; and raised nearly $5,000 to benefit locals living with HIV/AIDS, according to PWACU director Toni Johnson. Although pre-orders for the plants (which can only be ordered in red) technically closed Nov. 21, stragglers shouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t despair. Johnson said the Coalition will still take orders until Dec. 7. Plants ordered by this date will be delivered Dec. 11 or Dec. 14. The poinsettias stand at an average height of 9-12 inches and come in an

GROOMING

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Opinion

Letters

Email letters@qsaltlake.com

Thank You Sluts Editor: I really enjoyed your article about the Cyber Sluts [Utah Cyber Sluts, Nov. 16]. I have long admired that group. They contribute so much to the LGBT community and beyond. I am glad to see them receive the recognition they deserve. I also enjoy Ruby Ridge’s column. To the Cyber Sluts past, present and future, I say thank you for all you do! Laura Milliken Gray Salt Lake City

Guest Editorial Seeking Leadership from Bush on World AIDS Day

By Arlene Bardeguez, HIV Medicine Assn Chair

From the Editor Lott’s ‘Wife?’ Well, there’s rumor and innuendo out there again as another Gay Ol’ Perverts leader resigns suddenly and mysteriously. The day Sen. Trent “Family Values” Lott announces he will resign his U.S. Senate seat one year into his six-year term, a D.C. blogger reveals that he has received word that Lott allegedly hired the services of a (very cute) call boy on at least two occassions. Big Head DC blogger Rob Capriccioso raced to the scoop with a story titled “Trent Lott Fallout: The Gay Escort Who Knew Too Much.” “Once upon a time,” the blog starts, “there was a twentysomething boy-next-door type with reddish blond hair and a brilliantly white smile.” “That 20-something boy,” says Capriccioso, “is San Antonio blogger/hustler Benjamin Nicholas.” His Web site, “Fifteen Minutes,” launched his escort career and landed him freelance writing positions in various publications, including Seattle’s The Stranger. Capriccioso used several innuendo-heavy emails between him and Nicholas and “other research” (which he has yet to reveal) to “out” Lott as a call-boy renter. “One of the politicos Big Head DC has learned [Nicholas’] alleged to have been involved with is the married Sen. Trent Lott, 66, who unexpectedly announced his retirement on Monday. Lott is well-known to have been against a plethora of gay rights issues throughout his terms in Congress. He was also good friends with Sen. Larry Craig throughout his time in Congress,” Capriccioso wrote. While reading the email exchange between the two, this may come down to simply two men seeking publicity to further their careers. To Capriccioso’s question, “A commenter on the site recently said that you and Sen. Trent Lott happened to be vacationing together at the same place on a couple of separate occasions. Could you clarify whether you know Sen. Lott in any way?” Nicholas answered, “no comment.” Oooh, enticing.

“Totally off the record,” Capriccioso dug, “can you explain why you have no comment?” “Trent is going through his fair share of scrutiny right now and I don’t want to add to it,” Nicholas replied. “All I can say at this point is no comment. It’s the professional thing for me to do.” Hmmm ... he uses his first name, neither denies or confirms ... more enticing. The emails continue and Nicholas remains coy. Capriccioso goes to “press.” Then Nicholas fires back: “It looks like a Washington DC-based blog called Big Head DC is making claim that there was (or, is) a working relationship between myself and Senator Trent Lott. There are falsely pieced-together quotes that serve no purpose other than to sensationalize a completely fabricated scoop. I will continue to offer a great sense of confidentiality to the people I see. I have not, nor have I ever seen or had contact with Senator Trent Lott. It’s as simple as that. It never happened.” Well, if the allegations are true and Lott did hire Nicholas and he revealed it to a blogger, Nicholas is out many high-profile clients for betraying Lott. If they are false, Nicholas used Capriccioso for some publicity. Enter Larry Flynt. Yes, that Larry “Hustler” Flynt. “HUSTLER Magazine has received numerous inquiries regarding the involvement of Larry Flynt and HUSTLER in the resignation of Trent Lott. Senator Lott has been the target of an ongoing HUSTLER investigation for some time now, due to confidential information that we have received.” So, two semi-not-so-credible sources taint the resignation of Lott as something dirty. The truth, however, may simply be that Lott is greedy. Congress passed a law that goes into effect in just a few weeks, keeping former congressmen from lobbying Congress for two years, rather than the current one year. Lott may just be reaching for that golden parachute so he can yank the rope a year earlier, making him a lot of money. In any way this plays out, Lott is still a gay-hating, money-grubbing zealot who should talk no more about “family values” than ... Sen. Larry Craig. Or Robert Bauman. Or Mark Foley. Or Richard Curtis. Oops, out of room. Q

This World AIDS Day, the HIV Medicine Association is celebrating the good news from the United Nations Joint Program on HIV/AIDS that the global case count is lower than previous estimates. However, in the United States, this good news is tempered by President Bush’s veto of the annual funding bill that provides resources to fight the domestic HIV/AIDS epidemic — programs that have faced stagnant funding throughout the Bush administration despite the continued growth of the epidemic. An estimated one in four Americans infected with HIV does not know it, and the HIV/AIDS epidemic in the United States is growing most rapidly in poor, disenfranchised communities of color. The funding bill President Bush recently vetoed included increases to support the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention in implementing routine testing in health care settings and to help ensure that care is available to those who test positive by increasing support for HIV medical clinics funded under the Ryan White program. Research demonstrates that knowing one’s HIV status and keeping one’s viral load low with antiretroviral drugs are two factors that lower the risk of spreading the virus. But President Bush’s veto means the modest increases contained in the bill funding these measures are now in jeopardy. As the epidemic continues to grow, funding for programs to serve those most in need must grow as well. Flat funding of critical AIDS programs translates into more new infections and more Americans without access to lifesaving medical care and drug therapies. The president also is threatening to veto another bill providing budget increases for global HIV/AIDS and other infectious diseases programs, including funding for the Global Fund to Fight AIDS, Tuberculosis, and Malaria. The United States has taken a leadership role in efforts to control the global HIV/AIDS pandemic, and a veto would place this role in question. U.S. leadership in the global HIV/AIDS arena stands in stark contrast to its treatment of people with HIV/ AIDS wishing to travel to the United States. Last year the president promised to start a process to lift restrictions on people with HIV traveling to this country. But the rule the administration recently proposed falls significantly short. The new proposed rule continues to ignore long-standing statements from the U.S. Public Health Service that admitting people with HIV/AIDS into the country would not pose a significant risk to the U.S. population. It does not change the fact that, unlike people with any other manageable, chronic disease, people with HIV must demonstrate that they will pose no cost or risk to public health while in the United States. The proposed rule continues to impose a burdensome and stigmatizing process on people living with HIV/AIDS seeking to enter the country. This World AIDS Day, the theme is leadership at all levels of society. HIVMA calls on the Bush administration to exercise positive and consistent leadership in the fight against HIV/AIDS. On the one hand, the President’s Emergency Plan for AIDS Relief has put the United States at the forefront of the fight against HIV/AIDS in the developing world. But on the other hand, the president’s leadership on HIV/AIDS at home is strikingly lacking. HIVMA urges the president to immediately support the necessary funding for both domestic and global federal HIV/AIDS programs, and to lift restrictions against HIVpositive travelers to the United States. Q

Queer Gnosis Save the Heroes by Troy Williams troy@qsaltlake.com

In The Hero with a Thousand Faces, he explains, â&#x20AC;&#x153;It is not society that is to guide and save the creative hero, but precisely the reverse. Every one of us shares the supreme ordeal, and carries the cross of the redeemer.â&#x20AC;? Our elected and religious leaders donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have the answers. We do. We have to ask ourselves how will we survive as a people? How will we each contribute positively to a better world? That is our mission. And for starters letâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s pull Jesus off of his cross. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s time we started suffering for our own sins. And by that I mean finally taking responsibility for the mess that we ourselves have caused. Satan isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t fucking up the planet. We are. We must be leaders and social innovators. We must be ready to help our society transition into something new and better. Our global problems seem overwhelming. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a lot more inviting to shut down, get stoned and distract our minds with shopping and Americaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Next Top Model marathons on MTV. Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a time and place for all that. But there is also a time for waking up and taking action. Now. We can make our world a safer, better place. This is our destiny â&#x20AC;&#x201D; to be productive contributors to humankind. Letâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s save ourselves first and maybe the world will follow. Q

ruby@qsaltlake.com

So how hard could it be to make shortbread I thought to myself? Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s only got four ingredients and takes less than 45 minutes. Even I could do that. Well, in an ideal world that might be the case, cherubs, but sadly you can now add kitchens to the already lengthy list of places in which I shouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be allowed. Pull up a comfy chair and let me tell you how this culinary misadventure came about. My long lost sister, Kerry Boo, is in town visiting and she brought with her a book with the secret family recipes that have been faithfully handed down from generation to generation. There were casseroles, pasta dishes, desserts and sauces, but the one thing that made me instantly nostalgic was my grandmotherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s shortbread recipe. Now, pumpkins, this is no ordinary shortbread. Nooooâ&#x20AC;Ś this is the stuff of buttery legend! Her recipe was such a fiercely-guarded secret that she would even make the dough with her back to you. See â&#x20AC;Ś my paranoia and natural distrust comes from both nature and nurture! But I digress. Every year, right before Christmas, my grandmother would slavishly make shortbread around the clock in a steaming-hot kitchen in such massive quantities that Chinese child laborers look like slackers in comparison. The flaky, buttery end results were mailed and delivered to relatives and friends across the globe. So, riding a wave of pure nostalgia, I ran to the supermarket to buy the ingredients. Butter, powdered sugar, flour and even a few baking trays and cooling racks were no problem, but for the life of me, petals, I could not find cornflour. I didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t even know what cornflour was. So I ended up buying cornmeal which is totally not the same thing â&#x20AC;Ś who knew?

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Troy Williams is the producer of KRCLâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s RadioActive. He blogs at queergnosis.com.

Mountain Meadows Mascara Corn Whole by Ruby Ridge

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Meanwhile, back in the kitchen, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m half way through the blending and mixing process when I suddenly realized that I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t own a rolling pin. Hmmmm â&#x20AC;Ś does that technically mean Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m straight? Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m not sure. So with necessity being the mother of invention I improvised by using a Snapple bottle. Somewhere in Connecticut, Martha Stewart felt a disturbance in the force. The bottle worked fairly well until the label started coming off, so I ended up taking the last chunks of dough and made one big round mega-cookie. I ran into the office and jumped on the internet to find a Celsius-to-Fahrenheit conversion table (God bless the Buffalo, N.Y. office of the National Weather Service!) and then pre-heated the oven to 300 degrees. Then it was time to cut up the dough into those uniform little squares with the hand-crimped edges that I so fondly remembered. Yeah â&#x20AC;Ś like that was going to happen! Darlings, my pieces of shortbread looked like an unassembled model of Stonehenge! But I soldiered on placing them on the baking tray, oblivious to the fact that dough expands outwards. Now I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know why, but in my mind dough rises, so I just assumed they would go up. But by the time they cooked, they had all joined together en masse and were busy singing â&#x20AC;&#x153;we are the world.â&#x20AC;? It was not attractive! Remember the cornmeal that I mistakenly thought was cornflour? Well itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not the same thing and hereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s how I know this: My shortbread smelled buttery and sweet, and truth-be-told if you ignored the deformed shapes of the pieces and the bits where I used too much cooking spray and they fried, screaming in hot oil, they tasted pretty good. There was only one slight problem. They had the consistency of cat litter. Lord have mercy they were GRITTY! I guess its back to the kitchen to experiment, kittens. So if you see me coming to a potluck with a plate of something that looks like a retaining wall but smells like shortbread, RUN! Q

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D E C E m b e r 1, 2 0 0 7 ď Ž â&#x20AC;&#x201A; I S S U E 9 1 ď Ž â&#x20AC;&#x201A; Q S A LT L A K E ď Ž â&#x20AC;&#x201A; 13

I just marathon watched the first season of Heroes â&#x20AC;&#x201C; and thanks to a friendâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s DVR, later caught myself up on season two. The show is a gay boyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s dream: Milo Ventimigliaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s super-power is obviously to be the most beautiful human male ever. The show echoes the hopes of post-modern futurists who believe that a new evolution in humanity will save our collective asses as we march toward our cataclysmic end as a species. There must be something in the airwaves. The Sci-Fi Channelâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s re-imagined Battlestar Galactica also has a dark dystopian edge. This series depicts humankindâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s struggle to survive after the complete collapse of society. Both series explore the same question: Can humanity rise above bleak conditions and save itself from destruction? Inevitably, the enemy they face is themselves. Artists, filmmakers and comic book writers are reflecting the collective anxiety that many of us feel about humankindâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s tenuous fate. Villains lurk everywhere, and the masks they wear differ depending on your political bent. For the Left itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the fascistic tendencies of the Bush/Cheney regime. For the Right itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the Islamofascists plotting our doom (the best comic book villains always have fascist tendencies). It doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t take much to feel grim and alarmed about our world situation if youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re paying attention. The worldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s oil production is set to peak by 2010. Many reputable scientists and social thinkers argue that we will soon face the inevitable breakdown of our way of life. The American lifestyle is simply not sustainable and the stress points are starting to show. First energy scarcity will cause an economic collapse followed by the breakdown of global food production. Add planetary climate chaos and mass species extinction, and well, you get the picture. Society as we know it is facing a crisis point and what will emerge after it all goes down is anyoneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s guess. So yeah. A superhero to save humanity would be nice right about now. And if he looks like Peter Petrelli, all the better. Heroes holds to the idea that ordinary people can do extraordinary things. And if enough people gather together they can avert the annihilation of society. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Save the cheerleader, save the world.â&#x20AC;? Futurist and inventor, Buckminster Fuller was obsessed with the question: â&#x20AC;&#x153;Does humanity have a chance to survive lastingly and successfully on planet Earth, and if so, how?â&#x20AC;? Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m not sure he ever answered that question to his satisfaction, but it does seem to be the thematic core of Heroes and Galactica. In that sense, TV, movies and comics have become our modern mythologies. They tap into our deepest fears and reveal our greatest hopes. They wrestle with our existential dilemmas in a palatable, fictionalized form. But there is a danger in how we engage our myths. There are often malevolent archons that distort truth with deception. Conservative religions and political strategists have fostered an unhealthy and excessive dependency on external saviors and heroes. They perpetuate the delusion that we should look outside ourselves for power. Many frightened Americans look to President Bush to protect us from

terrorists. Some of us look to religions to spare us from the wrath of vengeful gods. Many of us look to lovers to save us from loneliness. We are always struggling with self-doubt and self-loathing. We are vulnerable creatures perpetually in need of redemption and from real or imagined monsters. We are still (to invoke the great Bonnie Tyler) holding out for a hero till the end of the night. But the real question is, who will save us from the monsters of our own creation? Because here is the brutal truth: Jesus ainâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t coming back. President Hilary Clinton will perpetuate war. Climate change is going to wreak havoc on the planet. Life in the very near future is going to be hell. There is no hero â&#x20AC;&#x153;out there.â&#x20AC;? We are all weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve got. And the sooner we accept this reality, the sooner we can seriously get onto solving our problems. Now despite all the above, my default state is optimism. I love the words of Molly Ivins: â&#x20AC;&#x153;One reason despair is not an option is because things can always get worse, and then whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll we do?â&#x20AC;? Exactly. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m a queer potentialist. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve always been able to see the power and possibility of our people. And I believe that as the world takes a turn, we can step up and make a difference. It is possible that things might actually get better after they get worse. Joseph Campbell made the connection between outer myth and inner power.

14  Q S A LT L A K E  I S S U E 9 1  D E C E M B E R 1, 2 0 0 7

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Gay Geeks Gay Wizards are Gay By Joselle Vanderhooft

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Because I know there are some of you who still haven’t read it (naughty geeks!), this entire column is one huge spoiler for Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. All whiners will be fed to the basilisk. —JV So my geeky ones, where were you on the night of Oct. 19? You know, when J.K. Rowling outed Albus Dumbledore? And no, I checked. It wasn’t a joke. To recap for those of you saying “huh?” or “didn’t JoSelle already write about this in July?”: Rowling told the world that Dumbledore is “Family” at a Carnegie Hall reading, when a little girl asked her this question: Did Dumbledore, who believed in the prevailing power of love, ever fall in love himself? “My truthful answer to you … I always thought of Dumbledore as gay,” Rowling responded. When the fans had stopped applauding and screaming with joy (Scout’s honor), she explained that Harry’s mentor had fallen in love with Gellert Grindelwald, a boyhood friend who later became one of the world’s most notorious dark wizards, and Dumbledore’s enemy. You know, the cute blonde one posing with a younger Dumbledore in that photograph? Yeah. Your gaydar got tripped for a reason there.

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So where were you? Well, when I realized it wasn’t an early April Fools joke concocted by an unholy alliance between Fark.com, The Onion and the same people who brought us that story about Paris Hilton and the drunken Indian elephants, I was kicking myself for not having caught on sooner. I mean, the flamboyant robes, the obsession with knitting, the flaming pet phoenix? Pass me that dragon steak, ya’ll. I think my face just got bruised by the anvil-sized hints. I’m kidding, I’m kidding. Actually, despite that “hmm this feels familiar, but why” feeling I got with Dumbledore, he never set my gaydar wailing like a Sneakoscope. And that’s what I found to be so cool about his outing. Despite all the jokes being made about flaming pets and brightly-colored robes and wand-waving,

Pass me that dragon steak, ya’ll. I think my face just got bruised by the anvilsized hints. Dumbledore … really never did anything to deserve them. I recall a lot of playful eccentricity, kick-ass duels with Lord Voldemort and fatherly advice to Harry, but lisping, mincing and randomly bursting into renditions of “Somewhere Over the Rainbow?” Not so much. Dumbledore’s one of the more complex, flawed and interesting characters I’ve encountered in fantasy this year. For me, learning that he was complex, flawed and gay just adds more to my appreciation for him. Of course, not all fans agree with me. For some — particularly those who really, really hoped for an openly gay character in the books — Dumbledore’s closed-canon coming out party seemed cowardly. They also maintain that portraying Dumbledore as a celibate gay (at least, one without a partner who we ever meet) plays into antigay stereotypes, even into the idea that gays should be punished with isolation. I don’t agree with any of this, but I can understand the disappointment. For all its color and diversity, Harry’s world seems to be tragically heterocentric. Harry and his schoolmates (at least the ones we see dating and falling in love) all express interest in members of the opposite sex, and the only adult romantic relationships we see are heterosexual married couples. If you’re a queer reader, especially a younger reader just figuring out your sexuality, this can kinda suck. And yes, outing Dumbledore after the books have been written also gave Rowling a security from anti-gay critics, religious fanatics and other book-banners and book-burners that writing Dumbledore hand-in-hand with another wizard would not have given her. I can see how this would make Rowling look cowardly, or at least cagey, but I don’t think either is the case. Remember, we’re seeing the world of Harry Potter primarily through the eyes of its title character who begins

the series as an 11-year-old and ends it a few weeks shy of his 18th birthday. Harry is clearly a heterosexual teenager, and lots of heterosexual teenagers don’t think about gay people unless the issue is brought to their attention through a gay friend or family member. They’re just too busy with their own sexual issues, and have the social privilege to be preoccupied exclusively with those sexual issues. And really, we’re talking about a kid who didn’t even realize that his two best friends were romantically interested in each other until they pretty much spelled it out for him using short sentences and one-syllable words. If he’s that bad at picking up on heterosexual relationships, why would he be any better at picking up on homosexual ones? I love Harry, but intuition just is not his strong suit. And it would be out of character to write him otherwise. And as for Rowling being anti-gay just because she didn’t give Dumbledore a boyfriend? Come on, folks. There are many prominent characters of all ages who don’t have visible love interests: Mad Eye Moody, Sirius Black, Charlie and Percy Weasley, Kingsley Shacklebolt, Rita Skeeter, Dolores Umbridge, Rufus Scrimgeour and pretty much all of the Death Eaters to name just a few. And Hogwarts might as well be a Catholic monastery for all of the professors’ husbands, wives and lovers we get to see. Either they were single, or their love lives were simply not something that Rowling thought would contribute to her story. Ultimately, that’s what we have to remember when it comes to Dumbledore’s outing: authors have a limited time to tell a story. This means that they won’t be able to include everything they know about their world or their characters, no matter how cool these things are to fans. Sure, I wish Harry and friends could have met Dumbledore’s boyfriend or life partner. I’d love to know if Harry’s world is gay-friendly, or if it views gay wizards and witches with the same suspicion as it does Muggleborns. After all, gay and lesbian sex isn’t reproductive, so pureblood bigots might see any pureblood or half-blood who isn’t popping out babies as a blood traitor, right? The Nazis sure felt that way about gays, and pureblood supremacy sure has a lot in common with Hitler’s policies. But I digress. The fact that Rowling didn’t include this information doesn’t make her anti-gay or cowardly. It just means that she probably didn’t think it added to the story, which is ultimately about Harry’s adventures and not Dumbledore’s. So even though we didn’t get to see Albus Dumbledore and Gellert Grindelwald holding hands, I’m still thrilled that J.K. Rowling made one of her series’ most interesting, thoughtful, kind and wise characters gay, and that she decided to tell us so we can now re-read her wonderful books with that knowledge in mind. Hooray for her, and hooray for Dumbledore, who would be fabulous no matter who he loved. Q

Bullshattuck Ryan is still wrestling with tryptophan in his system after Thanksgiving and will return in the next issue.

David Samsel Dating: Empty Scrotums By David Samsel

A few months ago I was on a date and the man sitting across the table told me that he could see and talk to dead people. Specifically two dead people, but I’ll spare you the hour and half worth of details. People, I hadn’t even gotten my entrée yet! What do you do in that type of situation? I’m still not sure. All I could think to do was drink more wine. But, hey, we’re all a little crazy. I can handle crazy. But what I seem to be running out of patience for is all these timid gay men. Logically we know that every man should have two balls, but, surprisingly, many gay men don’t seem to have any. How can this be? And where did all those balls go? To answer that, let’s talk about timidity. You never know the potential of anything until you try. Of course, nobody wants to be vulnerable, but the vulnerable spots in which we consciously place ourselves can also be the most rewarding. And when it comes to human relationships every spot is a vulnerable one, particularly because we fear being disappointed or flat-out rejected. Rejection can be brutal, but it can’t kill you, which means it can make you stronger. I should know, because I’ve been rejected many times. I’m not saying that rejection doesn’t sting every single time — it’s not a pleasant thing — but being accepted or rejected doesn’t lessen or alter what you have to offer. It’s OK if someone isn’t into you the way that you’re into them. Think of it this way: There are plenty of people who you don’t want to date or who you don’t find sexually attractive, right? The same is true for everyone. Chemistry between people is a mystery. And while attraction is difficult to understand, the lack of it on one end does not reflect poorly on the other end. If you’re interested in someone, but you’re afraid to make a move, then you need to suck it up and get over it. If you’re insecure (who isn’t?), then you need to find a way to get a handle on that.

In learning how to cope, it’s okay to accept that you’ll probably always be a little nervous, especially when it comes to talking to someone you want to go out with. The point is to not let your insecurity get to you and run your life. Sometimes I wish a light would go on over people’s heads if you were interested in them and they were interested in you. But there is no easy button for dating, and really, it’s probably good that there is no such light. It would be pretty upsetting if half way through a conversation you saw the light turn off. Someone told me once that you should mirror the other person’s actions. Although people can often be impossible to read, it’s a good idea to follow this rule: If you’re the one making all the moves or sending all of the text messages, then that probably isn’t a good sign. But you don’t have to learn to read the signs that someone else is putting off. If all else fails, you can just use your words. Be honest, communicate and cut out the games. Don’t make assumptions and don’t reject yourself for the other person. Focus more on communicating your desires and interest and less on protecting your ego. Egos can be ugly things, they can push people away, and they’re often used to guard against genuine human contact. I respect anyone who has the balls to approach a total stranger. It takes courage and a sense of self, and for most people it’s very difficult. So the next time someone approaches you, in person or otherwise, and you’re not interested (for whatever reason), I hope you will communicate that as gently as possible. And if you ever approach someone who makes it clear they’re not interested in you, please remember that their reason doesn’t matter and please don’t ask. Then handle the situation with some grace. If the person you approach is rude in their rejection of you, then recognize that you’ve just been handed the opportunity to be the bigger person; the bigger person who just found out that someone on whom they took a risk doesn’t deserve you. I know that there are a lot of good people out there who have a lot to offer, but who don’t go after what they want for various reasons. To quote Friedrich Nietzsche, “Is life not a hundred times too short for us to stifle ourselves?” So go for it, and no matter the outcome, be better for it. Q

Nuptials daughter of the late J.P. and Alberta Banks and

Holly Lynn Miller daughter of Ralph and Jan Miller are excited to announce their union ceremony after eleven years, eleven months, and eleven days... that occurred on Sunday, the eleventh of November two thousand and seven a celebration was held in their honour at Market Street Cottonwood

D E C E m b e r 1, 2 0 0 7  I S S U E 9 1  Q S A LT L A K E  15

P.R. Banks

16  Q S A LT L A K E  I S S U E 9 1  D E C E M B E R 1, 2 0 0 7

Utah AIDS Foundation, said the grant his organization received from the state health department did not include enough money for their HIV testing program to allow them to offer services in Southern Utah. According to him, the grant the Utah Health Department awarded UAF for 2008 included funding cuts in their outreach program to gay and bisexual men as well as their HIV testing program. Although Penfold added that he and his staff had yet to sit down with UDOH officials for contract negotiations, he said that the cuts for both programs “looked like it will be $10,000–$12,000.” (In contrast, Penfold said that the state awarded more money to UAF’s outreach program to gay and bisexual Hispanic men, increasing the budget for this program from $20,000 to $26,000.) “[As far as testing in Southern Utah is concerned] they’ve set us up in a no-win situation,” he said. “This whole situation is problematic because [HIV and STD testing] is a public health issue, yet it’s not being addressed at the state and county levels.” According to Penfold this is not the first year the Utah AIDS Foundation has faced funding cuts. Last year, the state health department reduced their total budget by $10,000. “It looks like this might be a trend,” he said. When asked about the decrease in funding for HIV/AIDS prevention programs in Utah, Meiner said that the Center for Disease Control, the division of the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services which gives state health departments the money to fund local HIV/AIDS programs, has been tightening its purse strings over the past four years. “There have been significant cuts in HIV prevention nationwide,” she said. According to the Kaiser Family Foundation, a non-profit group dedicated to researching major health issues in the United States, the CDC gave Utah $1,248,693 for HIV/AIDS programs in 2006, the fourth smallest grant it awarded after South Dakota, North Dakota and Idaho. According to its Web site, the CDC gave Utah $1,505,163 in 2005.

People Living with HIV/AIDS by Health District

HIV

AIDS

Bear River 19 Weber/Morgan 48 Summit 11 Davis 36 TRI-COUNTY 1 Salt Lake 658 Wasatch 1 Tooele 3 Utah 51 Central 7 Southeast 1 Southwest 21

22 79 11 56 5 858 4 8 63 11 5 30

NEW HIV NEW AIDS

2 5 0 4 0 58 0 1 2 0 1 0

1 4 1 3 1 39 0 0 3 1 1 4

TOTAL

41 127 22 92 6 1516 5 11 114 18 6 51

(NEW CASES THROUGH Oct. 2007) SOURCE: UT. DEPT of HEALTH GRAPHIC QSALTLAKE

By JoSelle Vanderhooft

n the last seven years, cities in Southern Utah — especially Cedar City and St. George — have seen a dramatic rise in population. And the Washington County HIV/AIDS Task Force has sought to make sure that the number of new HIV infections in the region doesn’t increase with the number of new people. Currently, the 14-year-old Task Force provides HIV/ AIDS prevention education and free same-day HIV tests once each month at the Doctors Free Clinic in St. George. But in 2008, the organization will have to do their work without any funding from the Utah Department of Health. “We’re very disappointed,” said Ruthann Adams, a retired public nurse who has served as the Task Force’s president for the past 10 years. As Adams explains it, she submitted a proposal to UDOH in September, asking for $11,000 to continue the Task Force’s free testing and educational outreach programs, which are regularly given to local university students (including first-year nursing students) and Dixie State University’s Pride Club. Additionally, she planned for the Task Force to expand its

advocacy to a number of other venues, including the Social Worker Group of Southern Utah and the local Drug Court, which enrolls up to 60 clients at a time. But despite Adams’ hard work and planning, her proposal was not one of the 11 a UDOH review committee selected to receive funds for HIV/AIDS education, testing and prevention. Twenty proposals from all over the state were submitted, and none of the accepted proposals came from organizations in Southern Utah. Adams said that Lynn Meinor, Director of UDOH’s HIV Prevention Program, gave her the following reason for her proposal’s rejection: “She said we didn’t seem to be reaching the population they wanted to reach.” Although Meinor said she could not comment on the proposals that did not receive the committee’s approval, she did say that the Utah AIDS Foundation had received funding to continue education and testing initiatives in Southern Utah. “The work will continue in the community,” she said. However, Stan Penfold, Executive Director of the

Trouble in 2007 But the lack of a state grant for 2008 is not the only funding crisis the Washington County HIV/AIDS Task Force has faced this year. According to Adams, it also did not receive funds for 2007 until this August. To explain the situation, some backtracking is required. In 2004, Adams served as Health Officer of the Southwest Utah Public Health Department, the public health organization serving Beaver, Garfield, Iron, Kane and Washington Counties. At that time she obtained a three-year, $15,000 grant from the state health department to fund HIV testing and education, as well as to handle testing for other communicable diseases, including tuberculosis. To get the money each year, Adams had to sign a contract with the state. All went well until 2006, when Adams retired. Commissioners from all five counties then selected Dr. David Blodgett to take over as Health Officer. At the time, Adams said Blodgett promised that he would sign the contract for 2007. But after several months had passed with no money, Adams said she realized that Blodgett had never signed the contract, leaving the Task Force struggling to fulfill its contractual requirements without any money to do so. “The local health department left us floating in the wind,” she said. “They never did tell us why they wouldn’t sign the contract.” Adams said she contacted the state health department to explain the situation, and at the end of August they sent her a check for the money. Three months later she says she has spent “over half” of the money, with bills for October and November that still need to be addressed. When asked why he didn’t sign the contract, Blodgett said that it was Adams’ and not his responsibility to sign the 2007 contract, and that Adams had taken the agreement with her when she retired.

“It was absolutely not [my responsibility]. That was never the agreement,” he said. Adams said that the contract only became her responsibility in July of this year, after Blodgett refused to sign it. “In the six months previous, the state health department was trying to negotiate with him to sign off on it,” she said. “We only became direct contractors instead of subcontractor with the state when he felt he couldn’t sign the contract.” Adams said she sent the Task Force’s bills to Blodgett, who never responded. She then called her friends at the Utah Department of Health to ask them what was going on. “They said they had sent the contract back to him with the revisions he had requested, and he didn’t sign it,” she said. Blodgett also said that he hadn’t heard about the Task Force’s inability to get state funding for 2008–2009. “There have been cutbacks in programming and I wasn’t aware the Task Force hadn’t received any money for next year,” he said.

concerned that the situation hasn’t improved. “I don’t think [chlamydia rates in Southern Utah] have gone down when you look at the number of cases reported statewide,” she said. According to data collected by the Utah Department of Health’s Bureau of Communicable Disease Control’s STD Control Program, the number of chlamydia cases reported in each county and region of Utah has steadily increased since 1995, and has climbed particularly in the past five years. The total number of reported cases of chlamydia in the state’s Southwest region (which includes Beaver, Garfield, Iron, Kane and Washington Counties) was 134 in 2002, 141 in 2003, 153 in 2004, 198 in 2005 and 216 in 2006. The total is not cumulative.

“The local health department left us ﬂoating in the wind,” she said. “They never did tell us why they wouldn’t sign the contract.”

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TESTING, TESTING As if these woes weren’t enough, the Southwest Utah Health Department also has not done testing for any communicable diseases (including sexually transmitted infections) since 2005. Although the organization’s Web site says that it will “attempt to find the source” of any of Utah’s 77 reportable diseases (that is, those that could drastically effect public health), and will attempt to “locate sexual contacts to assure they are disease-free” in the case of reported STIs, it refers people seeking STI testing to St. George’s Planned Parenthood. The Web site simply stresses that doctors who diagnose a communicable disease in a patient must report it to the Southwest Utah Health Department as soon as possible. Adams suspects the department cannot provide testing services because it lacks the money — a problem she said lies with local representatives who won’t vote to increase the department’s budget. She estimates that the budget for the health department is currently about “$4.60 per capita each year” with the rest of the money coming from state health department contracts. According to Adams, the local health department’s lack of funding for the Southwest Health Department leaves Southern Utah vulnerable to the spread of communicable diseases. As an example, she cited a survey the Washington County HIV/AIDS Task Force conducted in 1994 and 1995 to determine the rates of chlamydia (one of the most common STIs) in young, sexually-active women in Southern Utah. One in four of the sexually-active women age 18–22 who came in for testing had the disease. Although this survey was conducted over 10 years ago, Adams said she is

AN UNCERTAIN FUTURE Despite the loss of state funding, Adams said that the Task Force will do its best to continue testing and education services in Southern Utah. According to her, the Task Force still has some money in its bank account — “about $4,000–$5,000” — which will be used to continue with testing. Additionally, Adams said that she has recently heard that OraSure, the company which makes the same-day results HIV tests the Task Force has used, will continue to supply them with kits. She said she will also continue to teach university students about HIV/ AIDS and offer her clinicals to first year nursing students. “This is something that is important to us, so we’ve agreed that we’ll do the teaching if anyone calls,” she said. “We’re willing to do that for free.” Penfold said that the Utah AIDS Foundation will also continue to offer same-day results HIV testing at Southern Utah Pride, just as they have done for the past several years, But when it comes to doing more for the region with its budget cuts, Penfold said UAF would have to look at other options, including the possibility of combining forces with Planned Parenthood. “They have testing available, but it’s a bit expensive. Maybe we can see if we can work with them to lower the cost to make it more accessible,” he said. Meiner added that the Utah Department of Health would continue to train volunteers in the area to do HIV/AIDS counseling and testing, which they can offer in conjunction with events such as National HIV Testing Day and Southern Utah Pride. “We’ll take training down when there’s interest,” she said. Despite all of this, Adams said she is worried about the future, because her all-volunteer organization can only be stretched so thin. “Volunteerism just goes so far,” she said. “George Stoddard [the Task Force’s secretary, treasurer and support educator] are a bit burned out now, and we need help.” Q

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Obituary Chance Christopher Anderson

1984 ~ 2007 Chance Christopher Anderson, 23, passed away on Thursday, Nov. 22, 2007. He was born April 8, 1984, to Tommie V. and Susan Anderson, in Salt Lake City, Utah. Chance was a senior at the University of Utah specializing in Modern Dance. It was his pride and joy to have loved ones come and watch what he did best. He made many accomplishments while exploring his passion for dance. Chance choreographed pieces in the University of Utah Ballet Showcase, in the University of Utah student showcases from 2003–2006, as well as the University of Utah senior concert in 2006. He also was a guest choreographer/teacher for the West High School Dance Company and Winterguard, and technique classes at Judge High School. He also was a choreographer for Club Sound. Chance performed in many concerts at the University of Utah including student concerts, senior concerts, and seasonal showcases. His greatest accomplishments as a performer included being selected to perform with the Performance Dance Company under the choreography of Hope Clark, and Brent Schneider, performing in a senior concert piece by Ben Levy, being selected into the Chelsea Dance Theater, and, also performing in a local rendition of the Nutcracker. He is survived by his father Tommie and his stepmother, Dawn Anderson; brothers, John, David, Dakota (Josee), Todd (Jenifer) and Nick; grandmother, Pearl G. Connell and grandparents, John and Jeanne Jones; many aunts, uncles, cousins, nieces and nephews and many friends, from coast to coast, and very special friend, Craig. He was preceded in death by his mother, Susan; grandfathers, Virgil H. Anderson and A. Wayne Connell. The Anderson family, in memory of Chance, would like for a candle to be lit at 8 p.m. MST on Tues. Nov. 27, 2007. Many of his friends attended a vigil at Memory Grove to light a candle that night. In lieu of flowers, donations would be appreciated to the Utah Department of Modern Dance, University of Utah, 330 South 1500 East, Room 106, Salt Lake City, Utah 84112, in Chance Anderson’s name. There will be no funeral, he was cremated, and he is going home, at least for now. He was a wonderful son, and a friend to all, and we wish him a wonderful journey. We all love you Chance, your family and friends will never forget you and you will always be in our hearts forever.

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Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a New Day at A New Day Spa by Joselle Vanderhooft joselle@qsaltlake.com

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also helps to achieve. In fact, Johnston said she has experienced such client satisfaction, that clients who donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t lose at least ten inches total on their body can have the wrap for free. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The wraps can also help with psoriasis, diminishing stretch marks and even helping people with fibromyalgia, because it helps with circulation,â&#x20AC;? she said. Because of the positive feedback she has received from the wraps â&#x20AC;&#x201C; and because the cream is only available at A New Day Spa â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Johnston says her wraps have gained national attention, and have won her several out of state clients (although most come from Western states within driving distance). Several years ago, she said she gave one to talk show host Phil Donahue live on his show, and more recently one to Dancing with the Stars contestant and popular Utah-born chanteuse, Marie Osmond. Although the spa is not gay-owned, it welcomes gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender clients â&#x20AC;&#x201D; clients Robinson credits the spaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s emphasis on tolerance and spectacular customer service for drawing. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We are so open to anyone who comes in,â&#x20AC;? she says. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t judge. Our job is to cater to the needs and will of all clients.â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Gay clients regularly tell me when they walk in that the place feels really gay friendly, and that they donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t feel uncomfortable at all,â&#x20AC;? added Johnston. Ultimately, she said that she and her staff are fully dedicated to seeing their clientsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; health and happiness improve. Q

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Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a new day â&#x20AC;&#x201D; and a busy one â&#x20AC;&#x201D; at Sherry Johnstonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s A New Day Spa. At 10:00 a.m. on the day before Thanksgiving, hairdressers, massage therapists, nail technicians and other aestheticians duck into and out of Johnstonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s office, answering questions between seeing clients. At her desk for a brief moment between helping two clients get into the spaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s famous JoAva body wraps, Johnston smiles, sighs in mock-exhaustion and laughs. â&#x20AC;&#x153;And this is one of our slow days!â&#x20AC;? But there are rarely any true slow days at A New Day Spa (which earlier this year moved from its Sugar House location to the former Salon Utopia on Highland Drive). And rarely any slow days for its owner, either. Johnston got into the spa business 33 years ago. Her spa was called Get Physical until fifteen years ago when it moved to the Courtyard Building in Sugar House and effectively changed its name. Johnston saw the spa grow and change over three decades while owning other businesses, including four video stores and a restaurant. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I have a hard time with doing just one thing,â&#x20AC;? she said. Still, Johnston said if she had to pick just one thing it would be her salon and spa. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not just about the money for me, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s about the game,â&#x20AC;? she said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a great business. I love the smell of hair being done. I love the smell of nails.â&#x20AC;? And she also loves adding new services for her clients, especially now that the spa has moved into a new and bigger building. Among its many services A New Day currently offers manicures, pedicures, hair styling, permanent make up and facials, eyelash extensions, energy work, psychic and Tarot card readings, floral essence work, massage and acupuncture. Tanning beds have also been ordered, and Johnston said she hopes to hire a yoga instructor to teach classes in the spaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s basement. One of the new services Johnston and her employees are particularly excited about is the Six Hand Massage. This unique, intensive one hour and ten minute session was created by several of the spaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s massage therapists, including Connie Robinson (who specializes in deep tissue, neck and wrist), Diana Espnez (energy work) and Julie Wilcox (injury massage). â&#x20AC;&#x153;In this massage, we do almost every modality, including deep tissue, acupressure, energy work, shiatsu, sports massage, trigger point, cranial/sacral and stretching after the massage is over,â&#x20AC;? said Wilcox. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The basis [for including the different techniques] is to create a full balance between body, mind and emotion, so if somethingâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s out of whack, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be fixed.â&#x20AC;? But one of Johnstonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s favorite services is the JoAva body wrap, which she named for her eldest daughter JoAva Markovich (who has done nail art, facials and permanent make up at the spa for the past twelve years). Johnston performs the body wraps by having her client un-

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dress down to their underwear, and then coating their bodies in a cream that she developed with a chemist 33 years ago. The cream includes niacin (vitamin B 3) and a number of other nutrients the body needs. Johnston applies it to detoxify the body and to help give it some of the vital nutrients it may be lacking. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Because the body needs everything in the cream, thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no way you can be allergic to it,â&#x20AC;? Johnston explained. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Typically when people break out in a rash after, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s because they havenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t had enough water, or theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve eaten things like white bread or refined sugar. Theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll get rashy then because the body is trying to flush those toxins.â&#x20AC;? After the coating, Johnston wraps her clients in cellophane, which she removes an hour to two hours later, depending on client preference and familiarity with the process (clients undergoing their first wrap are typically taken out after an hour). Together, cream and cellophane create one of the wrapâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s most popular benefits: flattening fat cells so the client loses inches from his or her legs, stomach, thighs, buttocks and upper arms, which the tightly-wrapped cellophane

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The Gay Agenda YOUR CALENDAR OF ARTS, ENTERTAINMENT & IMPORTANT EVENTS

I spent last Saturday night in Park City hanging with some local girls. Yes, girls! For some reason I attract them like lint to belly buttons. But there was this one guy with a footballer physique and milky hands that plays the hetero-turned-drunken homo. I don’t understand these men, they make me feel uncomfortable. If they want to play on my side of the fence, they should bring all of themselves, not just stick appendages through the slats.

1SATURDAY Q Actress/comedian Julia Sweeney brings her one-woman show ‘Letting Go of God’ to Utah. Sweeney’s adrogynous character Pat on Saturday Night Live catapulted her to stardom. Her new show deals with first-person experiences ranging from cancer survivorship to conversion to atheism, and she takes the audience along for a thought-provoking ride into the woman’s psyche. 7:30pm, Eccles Center, 1750 Kearns Blvd., Park City. Tickets $18–65, 435-655-3114 or ecclescenter.org.

Q Their sound is rooted in “straightahead” jazz, but their concerts reveal an inherent ability to explore and play odd time signatures while naturally integrating the influences of funk, blues, rock and reggae. Check out The Brubeck Brothers, sons of jazz icon Dave Brubeck, tonight. 7:30pm, The Grand Theatre, 1575 S. State St. Tickets $25, 957-3322 or the-grand.org. Q Author/photographer Mark Thompson, who has scribed a trilogy of gay spirituality books, displays 14 images of gay liberation pioneers in his Fellow Travelers Exhibit. All proceeds/donations and sale of books will go towards scholarships for those interested in attending Queer Spirit Retreats. Thompson will also be holding a book signing on Dec. 7 from 7–9pm. Regualr business hours, through Dec. 31, A Cup of Joe, 353 W. 200 South. Free, donations appreciated, 363-8322 or queerspirit. org.

2SUNDAY Q “The wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round.” “The queers on the bus go up and down, up and down.” Hold the gravy boat! The Fabulous Fun Bus is a clean, sin-free

trip to Wendover — absolutely no drinking, smoking, gambling or perverse acts allowed. Oh, pshaw! 10am–8pm, some dump (no, not TryAngles) in Wendover, Nevada. Bus fare $21, 649-6663 or gaywendover. com.

IRA GLASS See Dec. 2

Q Now in its 23rd year, the radio talk show This American Life is still as popular as ever. Ira Glass, host of the NPR show, tells sometimes funny, sometimes touching, but always unexpected stories. This outspoken American radio icon shares these stories today during a special engagement. 2pm, Kingsbury Hall, 1395 E. Presidents Circle, UofU. Tickets $28.50– 38.50, 581-7100 or kingtix.com.

3MONDAY Q Have you finished your holiday shopping? If you’re like me, the answer is “hell no!” Anyhoo, get a jumpstart on it at the Ten Thousand Villages Shopping Night. This wonderful “fair trade” boutique in Sugar House offers handmade clothing, jewerly, tree ornaments, pottery and many other gift ideas perfect for the holidays. Tonight, 20 percent of all sales benefit the Utah AIDS Foundation. So get ’er done, slackers! 5–8pm, Ten Thousand Villages, 1941 S. 1100 East. Visit tenthousandvillages.com.

5WEDNESDAY Q Weber State University Department of the Performing Arts and the Union Station Foundation present a holiday gift to the community, Jingle Bell Jazz, a free yuletide concert to get you “jazzed” up for the season. 7:30pm, Union Station, 2501 Wall Avenue, Ogden. Free, 626-6431.

7FRIDAY Q The Salt Lake Men’s Choir is singing for “their supper.” The 25th annual holiday concert Christmas Soup is a free “thank you” to the public. You are just asked to bring a food donation to the Utah Food Bank or Utah AIDS Foundation Food Bank. Get prepared for some traditional and not-so-traditional carols, a sing-a-long, a special jolly “guest appearance” and a delightful duet of Baby It’s Cold Outside featuring our very own publisher. 7:30pm, through Saturday, First Baptist Church, 777 S. 1300 East. Free, non-perishable food donations requested, saltlakemenschoir.org. Q Art at the Main joins the monthly Gallery Stroll with their Holiday Gallery

Stroll, a “street fair” festival of local art, musicians and gifts. This should be another wallet-burning shopping spree ... but worth it for our loved ones. 6–9pm, City Library, 210 E. 400 South. Free. Q I was recently introduced to the ’60sstyle indie folk group Iron & Wine, and was instantly impressed. In fact, their music makes me want to frolick through a field of sunflowers in a muumuu. If nothing else, they are perfect for those peaceful, cricket-filled nights of camping. 7pm, Salt Air, 12408 W. Salt Air Drive. Tickets $20/adv–$25/day of, 467-8499 or smithstix.com. Q Pioneer Theatre Company presents Larry Shue’s The Foreigner, a hilarious comedy about our inherent need to share confidences that we know deep down will come to light. Betty Meek’s fishing lodge in rural Georgia is a sleepy little place until Charlie Baker shows up, speaking a strange language and claiming to understand no English. You get the idea, right? 7:30pm, through Dec. 22, Pioneer Theatre, 300 S. 1400 East, UofU. Tickets $21–39, 5816961 or pioneertheatre.org. Q Several local artists exhibit paintings of local setting including the City County Building, Trax line on Main Street, and the 9th and 9th area as observed through Night & Day — first in the clarity of sunlight and then by the romantic glow of streetlights and lurid glare of neon. 6–9pm, holiday reception tonight and noon–6pm Wed.–Sat., through Dec. 22, HORNE Fine Art Gallery, 142 E. 800 South. Free, 533-4200 or hornefineart.com.

8SATURDAY Q You’ve heard opera, and you’ve heard rock, but have you ever heard

opera rocked like the East Village Opera Company? This powerhouse five-piece band, string quartet, and two outstanding vocalists bring opera into the 21st Century — expect a fresh take on opera’s “greatest hits.” 7:30pm, Eccles Center, 1750 Kearns Blvd., Park City. Tickets $18–65, 435-655-3114 or ecclescenter.org.

9SUNDAY Q In conclusion to the Royal Court of the Golden Spike Empire’s Snowball Weekend is a fabulous party, Wish ... A Masquerade Ball. This great fund raiser benefits the Court’s AIDS Fund and is sure to heat up some of those frigid ...oh, never mind. 5pm, Black Box Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. Broadway. Donations $20, 355-ARTS or arttix.org.

12WEDNESDAY Q The gays were nestled all snug in their beds while gifts from sugar daddies danced in their heads. Wow, I’m a plagarizing poet, and didn’t even know it. Anyhoo, the Salt Lake Dance Center presents The Night Before Christmas, a story ballet based on the holiday classic poem of a similar title. 7pm, Jeanne Wagner Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. Broadway. Tickets $10, 355-ARTS or arttix.org.

13THURSDAY Q Charlotte Boye-Christensen and Ririe-Woodbury Dance Company present a new collaborative work with four gangster-turned-artist youths. Alchemy poignantly explores the struggles of identity and human experiences through those who had no voice. This project is meant to stimulate awareness about the healing power of art. 7:30pm, Black Box Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. Broadway. Tickets $10–20, 355-ARTS or arttix.org.

15SATURDAY Q I’m sure some of you have asked, “Where Have All the Cowboys Gone?” just as the fabulous Paula Cole. The Grammy-winning singer/songwriter returns to Utah captivating all with her sultry voice and enthralling the lesbians with her hairy armpits. Oooh La La! 7:30pm, Eccles Center, 1750 Kearns Blvd., Park City. Tickets $18–65, 435-655-3114 or ecclescenter.org.

UPCOMING EVENTS

Jan. 11 — Suzanne Westenhoefer, Rose Wagner Center Mar. 6 — Matchbox Twenty, E Center Mar. 15 — Rufus Wainwright, Park City

By Michael Aaron

While at dinner before the opening of Gutenberg! the Musical, Plan B Theatre Company’s Producing Director Jerry Rapier said it was time for a more lighthearted production. “We had done so many heavy issues in the past year, we needed a laugh,” Rapier said. And laugh is all we did on opening night as QSaltLake Arts Editor Tony Hobday and I sat in the front row. Gutenberg! The Musical is a show about aspiring playright/schlemiels Bud Davenport and Doug Simon and their misguided fantasy that they have written the next great Broadway musical about, of all people, Johann Gutenberg, the inventor of the printing press. Played by Plan B favorites Jay Perry (Marcus in Facing East) as Bud and Kirt Bateman (Exposed, director of Tragedy: A Tragedy) as Doug, the duo play their characters’ over-zealous passion for the show with bounding energy from the moment they enter the stage through their last line. As the audience makes its way to the general seating in the Rose Wagner’s Studio Theater, they are presented with the full stage of a light/sound booth, a piano and a table full of hats scrawled with names like “Drunk 1,” “Drunk 2,” “Rats” and “Johann.” Bud and Doug burst onto stage like giddy schoolgirls and explain that this is a backers audition and they know (or desperately hope) that potential Broadway producers are among us in the audience. “Chances are, if you don’t know the person sitting next to you, they are Broadway producers,” Bud proclaims. With no supporting cast, they have come up with the idea of hats showing when they are playing what characters. Indeed, much of the show’s greatest laughs come from the pair’s juggling of hats, especially a “chorus line” that comes out of nowhere and smacks you right on the funny-bone. At times the two

are wearing a dozen hats during numbers where quick character-changes are required. The rest of the laughs come from the the characters’ naiveté, misguided enthusiasm and the absurdity of the lyrics of the show’s several musical numbers. Where else on earth will you hear such musical gems as “Gutenberg, darn tootenberg!” After explaining that all important Broadway musicals must center around an important issue, and that “the Holocaust happened,” the characters set up Act One, Scene One in the town of Schlimmer, Germany, where wine pressman Johann Gutenberg is inspired to make the world’s first printing press because the townfolk are sad since they cannot read. (Get it? How far is a wine press from a ... printing press?) An evil monk, whose power is derived from being the town’s only literate man, is threatened by Gutenberg and goes on a quest to crush him through Gutenberg’s assistant/love interest, Helvetica. Yes, Helvetica. Other characters include two drunk men, an anti-Semitic flower girl, a dead baby and a cat. Doug and Bud take breaks from their marathon performances to giddily comment and explain the plot. “That’s called character development” they explain after “the love ballad,” or “charm song” meant to distract the audience from the show’s actual plot. Helvetica is convinced by the evil monk to destroy the printing press (using a pencil) and, therefore, the townfolks’ ability to learn to read.” n the end, explain our protagonists, the printing press is reconstructed, the Gutenberg Bible is printed, and the masses learn to read. Though, they lament, the Holocaust still happened, so the printing press didn’t solve all of the world’s problems. Written by Scott Brown and Anthony King, the first act of the show was presented at a musical-theater festival in

GUTENBERG! THE MUSICAL! opens Nov. 16 and runs through Dec. 30 at Studio Theatre, Rose Wagner Performing Arts Center, 138 W. Broadway. Tickets $18, 355-ARTS or planbtheatre.org/Gutenberg.

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Q I think we all would feel what George Bailey felt in It’s A Wonderful Life because we all have something extraordinary to offer, especially to those who love us. Ahhh ... I’m so uncharacteristically tender right now and feeling slightly nauseous. Anyhoo, Odyssey Dance Theatre opens their creative production of the holiday classic film tonight. Definitely don’t miss it. 7:30pm, through Dec. 22, Kingsbury Hall, 1395 E. Presidents Circle, UofU. Tickets $20–40, 581-7100 or kingtix.com.

Plan B’s ‘Gutenberg! The Musical’ is a Romp

2005 and picked up by a London producer who commissioned the second act. The show opened off-Broadway as a six-week run in November 2006, but was moved to a larger theater and extended through May of this year. It was there that Rapier caught the show in February while snowed in during last winter’s storms. “When I saw it in New York, I had never laughed so hard,” Rapier told us. “After the first act I got on the phone during intermission to see about booking space for the show. I hadn’t even seen the second act.” Timing was right for Rapier as the show’s rights were about to come available right after he talked with Brown and King. Gutenberg! is the second regional premiere the acting company has produced, the first being The Laramie Project. The show is a departure from Plan B’s usual repertoire. The company generally presents poignant, politically-motivated productions. “We wanted to present something to our audiences that was more light-hearted for the holidays,” Rapier explained. But there are political tones in everything staged. Perry appreciated the sensitive nature of the show’s one gay joke. “I wanted to make sure we were playing it properly,” he said after the opening show. “We didn’t want it to come across wrong, but still wanted to show the embarrassment of the situation.” In the gag, Bud ends up in Doug’s lap with Doug’s arm around him while they introduce themselves. Bud tells us that sometimes they act just like a married couple, but “I’m not gay.” “But I am,” explains Doug. Awkward pause. And on we go. The scene is all about Perry’s facial expressions and he handles it flawlessly. On the group’s MySpace page, Rapier wrote about the “family appropriateness” of the show in a piece that will appear in December’s Catalyst Magazine: “It’s been a little surreal fielding phone calls asking if the show is appropriate for kids. Not a question we usually get at Plan-B. This is what I’ve been telling people: • there is one F word • there is one gay joke • there are many boob jokes “I got one call from a mother asking me if it was appropriate for her 12-yearold son. I gave her the list above. She laughed. ‘I say the F word more than I should. And my son is gay, so the boob jokes won’t really be an issue.’” Musical staging is by Colleen Lewis. Musical direction is by Jeffrey Price, who also plays the piano during the performance. A surprise guest appears at the end of the show and joins Bud and Doug in song. “Really, this show is for anyone who loves musical theatre,” Rapier said. “It’s sweet and funny. The kind of show you’ll want to drag your friends to.” The show, Rapier believes, is scheduled to be the longest-running show ever at the Rose. It will run through Dec. 30. Drag your friends to Gutenberg! and show them that Salt Lake theater can be fun and light-hearted. You’ll walk away wondering how two guys can keep up such a pace for 90 minutes and you’ll be humming any of the dozen or so fun tunes that will stay in your head for days. Q

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EVENTS THIS MONTH AT THE

Hollywood Buzz BY ROSS VON METZKE

DEC 1 1:30p “For the Bible Tells Me So” 6p Twelve Step: Free to be Me 7:30p Crystal Meth Anonymous DEC 2 10a Event 1p Neighborhood Potluck 3p Twelve Step: GLBT AA DEC 3 6p Just Q! 6:30p DiverseCity Writing Group 8p Twelve Step: Gay Men’s AA

DEC 4

6:30p Focus Group for HIV Positive Men 7p Women’s Support Group 8p Twelve Step: Live & Let Live DEC 5 12p Men’s Sack Lunch 7p Sexual Violence Support Group 7:30p Twelve Step: Sober Today

DEC 6

4p Free HIV Testing 5p Parents of Transgender Youth Group 5p Transgender Youth Group 6:30p Transgender Adult Support Group 7p Empowerment Workshops - Gender

Every so often our browser mysteriously drifts over to a site called The Boy (terra. com.br/theboy). It’s a launch pad for various South American models, men who have gone on to wear brands like Aussie Bum and 2xist — and get a rise out of many a gay fan. The Boy is also the site where the world first met Rafael Verga, who spent a good year on our top 10 list. And now, the site brings us an equally hot hunk of meat: VINICIUS NAVAL.

DEC 7

7p Utah Polyamory Society Meeting 8p Twelve Step: Stonewall Group

DEC 8

10a Fellow Travelers / Gay Soul Making 6p Twelve Step: Free to be Me 7:30p Crystal Meth Anonymous

DEC 9

3p Twelve Step: GLBT AA 4p Rainbow Roundup Committee Meeting 5p Event

DEC 10

6:30p Partners ofTransgender Adult Group 8p Twelve Step: Gay Men’s AA

DEC 11

4p Public Safety Meeting 7:30p Men’s Support Group 8p Twelve Step: Live & Let Live

DEC 12

12p Men’s Sack Lunch 5p HIV Testing 7:30p Twelve Step: Sober Today

DEC 13

5p Ten Thousand Villages Community Benefits Shopping Night 5p Transgender Youth Group 7p Empowerment Workshops - Gender 7p Bisexual Community Forum

DEC 14

7p Gay Bingo 8p Twelve Step: Stonewall Group

DEC 15

10a Western Transsexual Support Network 6p Twelve Step: Free to be Me 7p Event 7p Community Holiday Party 7:30p Crystal Meth Anonymous

DEC 16

12p Rainbow Classic Car Club 3p Twelve Step: GLBT AA 7p LDS Reconciliation

DEC 17

6:30p DiverseCity Writing Group 8p Twelve Step: Gay Men’s AA

DEC 18

7p Film & Discussion 7p Women’s Support Group 7:30p Royal Court Meeting 8p Twelve Step: Live & Let Live

DEC 19

12p Men’s Sack Lunch 7p Sexual Violence Support Group 7:30p Twelve Step: Sober Today

DEC 20

8a GLBTQ Affirmative Psychotherapy Guild of Utah 4p Free HIV Testing 5p Parents of Transgender Youth Group 5p Transgender Youth Group 6:30p Transgender Adult Support Group

DEC 21

8p Twelve Step: Stonewall Group

DEC 22

5p Aspen Grove Yule Celebration 6p Twelve Step: Free to be Me 7:30p Crystal Meth Anonymous

DEC 23

3p Twelve Step: GLBT AA 7p Utah Polyamory Society Meeting

DEC 24

6:30p Partners ofTransgender Adult Group 8p Twelve Step: Gay Men’s AA

Even that name is hot. Unlike so many men who make it in modeling, this one’s framed by a tuft of fur — a nice change of pace, I do say. Whether he’s stripping off his pants for a brief boudoir shot or standing in a doorway clad only in denim for that cowboy look, we’ll gladly sign on. We wish we could sit here and talk about the many perfect features of Vinicius all day. But sadly we’ve got to move on to the real reason you’re here — gossip! MADONNA has made no secret that little LOURDES, ROCCO and now DAVID aren’t allowed to watch television. Because with basic cable being what it is today, just imagine the crap Madonna’s filmed over the years that they might stumble upon. So I’m sure you can only imagine how the high priestess of pop responded when word hit The Sun that the producers of Harry Potter wanted Lourdes for the next flick. Now remember, this is The Sun we’re talking about; they’re less reputable than U.S. Weekly. But word on the street says Lourdes is keen to follow in mama’s footsteps — though I think a sex book is still probably a few years off. The article reads: “Lola has definitely inherited her mother’s hunger for fame. After all her recent public appearances, looking more like a sophis-

ticated teen than a child, the attention on her is really growing. Offers have poured in — film offers, sponsorship.” If Lourdes does go down that road, let’s just hope her Madgesty keeps a watchful eye on her. The last thing we need is Lourdes treading the path of Lohan. On the subject of singers, MARIAH CAREY has been gallivanting across the globe to promote her fragrance. And if you know Mariah, you know that just when you expect her to turn left, she veers right. This time, she veered into Glendale. You would think a woman who practically soaks in thousand dollar champagne would use a fragrance tour as a prime opportunity to hit up all of L.A.’s luxurious boutiques like Robertson and Rodeo Drive. But Mimi knows a thing or two about her target demo and, like CELINE and BRITNEY before her, I’m sure she’s aware Rite-Aid is not too far down the road for this signature scent. So Mariah slipped on her sky high stilettos and headed for a middle class suburb — The Glendale Galleria, no less, where she posed for photos, signed autographs and spritzed herself with her spray. Kudos to Mimi for not being too high class to kick it with the people. LENO may have brought donuts — followed quickly by EVA LONGORIA’S pizza pie peace offering — but ALICIA KEYS brought perhaps the greatest gift yet (her pipes) to the Writers Guild of America strike. Conveniently timed to coincide with the first week release of her new album, Keys serenaded eager strikers and promised to march with them.

Only she didn’t. Instead she marched straight to her car and high-tailed it out of that joint. Oh well. She’s not really a member of the television and film community, though she did make this summer’s The Nanny Diaries almost passable. I guess we can forgive her that one. Her album, by the way, sold more than 700,000 copies in its first week, the biggest sales for a female artist in two years. How many of those sales were strike related, I’m not sure. Apparently, pregnancy agrees with NICOLE RICHIE. Not only is she off drugs, but she seems to be so bored she actually took time away from mommy-to-be training to promote some invention that protects lamp posts from dog piss. Yeah, I actually just wrote that. According to DListed.com, Nicole said: “This invention is just so clever. It’s a cute rubber cup attached to the post and a hose that pipes urine into the gutter.” The inventor had this to add: “The average lamppost has a lifespan of 30 years but my invention could add a further 15 years.” I believe the phrase, ‘Don’t quit your day job’, applies here. Then again, the fact that her day job consists of getting paid cash to promote crap A-list celebrities turn down probably is the problem. At least she finally looks healthy, right? And to follow up with last week’s blurb about Days of Our Lives actor MARCUS PATRICK … check out the photos PerezHilton.com (perezhilton. com/?p=9218) dug up of another barely clothed gig Marcus pursued in his past — that of go-go dancer at gay West Hollywood hot spot Mickey’s. The bar burned down earlier this year, and I certainly think Marcus set off the smoke detectors on this particular night. That’s all we got, folks. Join us next time and remember: Take time to stop and smell the gossip.

Gus Van Sant to Direct Sean Penn as Harvey Milk BY MICHAEL AARON

Sean Penn has been named to play gayrights icon Harvey Milk in a movie, currently titled Milk, which will begin production this January. Gus Van Sant will direct the film and Utah-native Dustin Lance Black has written the screenplay. Black is the creator of HBO’s Big Love and directed On The Bus. The film will be distributed worldwide by Focus Features, which is also co-financing the project with Groundswell Productions. The announcement was made Nov. 16 by Focus CEO James Schamus and Groundswell CEO Michael London. Harvey Milk (1930-1978) was an activist and politician, and the first openly gay man to be elected to public office in

America; in 1977, he was voted to the city supervisors’ board of San Francisco. The following year, both he and the city’s mayor George Moscone were shot to death by another city supervisor, Dan White. Mr. Milk was previously the subject of the Academy Award-winning documentary feature The Times of Harvey Milk (1984), directed by Rob Epstein and produced by Richard Schmeichen. Milk will be the first non-documentary feature to explore the man’s life and career. “Gus Van Sant is the perfect artist to bring to the screen the extraordinary story of Harvey Milk,” said Shamus. “We couldn’t be more thrilled to join our partners at Groundswell in helping make this dream project a reality.”

Rox Box

BY MIKEY ROX

The sad truth is that staggeringly few out, gay artists are making music worth adding to your iPod. Enter Guy B., the Israel-born immigrant whose debut album WITHIN ME marries muscular grooves to romantic lyrics, and gives birth to a baby called change. Exploding with the brand of bravado common to Brian McKnight or Kenneth â&#x20AC;&#x153;Babyfaceâ&#x20AC;? Edmonds, Guyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s combo of talent, tenderness and touches of R&B blended with Middle Eastern inďŹ&#x201A;uences show off the 30-year-old North Hollywood transplant as an up-and-comer who knows othersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; audio instincts as well as his own. On the title track, the non-nostalgic beat takes cues from established artists like J. Tim, while songs like â&#x20AC;&#x153;Wandering Eyesâ&#x20AC;? slow things down a bit, a la Ben Harper. Just how does that differ from the Jason & deMarcoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s of the world? For starters, this Guyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s got it goinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; on.

Growing up in Lawrenceville, Penn. â&#x20AC;&#x201D; population 600 â&#x20AC;&#x201D; wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t easy for singer-songwriter Jana Losey. But what didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t kill her made her stronger, as evidenced through the seven tracks on her debut release, BITTERSWEET. An album that toggles between the oft-confusing contrasts of high and low, Bittersweet dramatically details the simplicities of small-town life while delving into the intricacies of half-living a lie. Losey croons like a sweet, folky fawn on the title track, then changes her tune on â&#x20AC;&#x153;London Holidayâ&#x20AC;? as she waspishly

wonders what life might be like outside the conďŹ nes of her own private Pennsylvanian prison. Adding more instability is that despite invoking the spirit of Sarah McLachlan on â&#x20AC;&#x153;(S)he Loves Meâ&#x20AC;? wherein Losey calls into question her own sexuality, the out and proud artist abruptly does an about-face to offer wise-beyond-her-years advice on â&#x20AC;&#x153;Little Sister.â&#x20AC;? What do you do when youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve produced some of the biggest acts on the â&#x20AC;&#x153;outâ&#x20AC;? music scene? If youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re producer-turnedsinger-songwriter Alan Lett, you steal their thunder with an album of your own. Released exclusively on iTunes, Lettâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s A MOMENT AWAY delves into the questionably adult realm of love, heartbreak, clubbing, money and, yes, even karaoke. Written, produced, recorded and sequenced at the emerging artistâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Houston, Texas, home studio, A Moment Away features campy lyrics to catchy songs such as â&#x20AC;&#x153;Richâ&#x20AC;? and â&#x20AC;&#x153;Do U Miss UR gf?â&#x20AC;? Purely for fun, assures Lett, his debut release bears Top 40-laden DNA, the composition of which has the potential to spawn neo-queer classics, such as â&#x20AC;&#x153;Unpredictable,â&#x20AC;? about his own discovery of the dance ďŹ&#x201A;oor. Says the southerner about his freshman offering, â&#x20AC;&#x153;I canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t deny my love of pop music, and todayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Top 40 is ďŹ lled with lyrics about things that really donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t even make sense. I wanted to capture that.â&#x20AC;? One of Rolling Stone magazineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;Top 10 Artists to Watch,â&#x20AC;? acclaimed singersongwriter Nicole Atkins makes her full-length debut with NEPTUNE CITY, a

modern integration of vaudevillian and psychedelicera inďŹ&#x201A;uences, and draped with twangs of country, folk, rock and blues. With her band The Sea, Atkins has created a far-reaching record that distinguishes itself from the New Jersey shore from whence it came, revealing 10 songs drenched in the sort of climbing whimsy that girls her age typically know nothing about. Years beyond accepted range and capability, Atkins elegantly captures the essence of the late Freddie Mercuryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Queen on the track â&#x20AC;&#x153;Brooklynâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s on Fire,â&#x20AC;? while calling on anti-doo wop female icons of the 1960s and â&#x20AC;&#x2122;70s to lend inspiration to the sweeping sounds of songs like â&#x20AC;&#x153;War Torn.â&#x20AC;? The new Janis Joplin sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not, but Atkins can likely hold her own in a Billboard brawl. Who is Mikey Rox? Who gives a fuck! But you can visit him at www.myspace.com/ roxmikey.

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It’s All About the Hook by Tony Hobday

tony@qsaltlake.com

When playwright J.M. Barrie wrote the story of The Boy Who Wouldn’t Grow Up, he likely was idealizing childhood for … yes, children. But it may not have occurred to him that “grown ups” would take a special liking to his antagonist, the boisterous evildoer Captain Hook. In every version of the magical tale I’ve seen, it’s all about the Hook. Egyptian Theatre Company’s production of Peter Pan is certainly no exception. As I occasionally scanned the sold out performance, the many well-behaved children were sitting on the edge of their seats, jaws dropped, completely engrossed right from the opening scene. The introduction of Captain Hook in Act II ignited more excitement among the adult crowd. From there on, scattered joyous laughter echoed. Mark Gollaher, in his first Egyptian production, reigns on stage as an animated and flamboyant Hook. Though similar to Johnny Depp’s Jack Sparrow character, Gollaher’s sensational performance is more reminiscent of a Carol Burnett skit – more facial twitches than a taser victim.

Director Adrianne Moore (also an ETC newcomer) likens the original story well including Barrie’s original ending that is rarely used in stage productions. In addition, Moore successfully pulls entertaining performances from the mostly young cast of 23 members. Notably, Allison Robbins’ (an effigy of the brilliant Keri Russell) reserved portrayal of young Wendy makes the idea of her as the newfound “Mother” of the Lost Boys more believable. Molly Jackson (Peter Pan) is the spitting image of Barrie’s main character and has a strong stage voice, but is shy on youthful playfulness we come to expect from Peter. The musical numbers don’t miss a beat in entertainment value. Most memorably are Hook and the Pirates’ tango, the touching jungle gym rendition of “I Won’t Grow Up” and the wellchoreographed Pow-Wow Polka. On a small stage such as that in the historic Egyptian theater, a dazzling set of Neverland would be less than easy to accomplish. However, the drab simplicity of the island set is disappointing, as if completely disregarded. On the other hand, Nancy Mills’

costume designs are fun and vibrant: The Lost Boys in colorful mismatched socks and the goofy expression on Nana, the “nanny” watchdog, and then there’s Hook in a flashy black, red and gold frock and sporting Cher’s “Turn Back Time” hairdo. I just hope through the remaining run of the show, there’ll be fewer unexpected button and embellishment launches. ETC’s long reputation as a small company with big productions is

inspiring and deserves respect because big and small don’t always fit comfortably. And even though occasionally you can feel the strain between the big and small in some ETC productions, you rarely feel uncomfortable. Like with Peter Pan, you’ll be glad you made the journey. Peter Pan runs Nov. 23 through Dec. 29 at the Egyptian Theatre, 328 Main Street, Park City. Tickets $17-36, call 435-649-9371 or visit egyptiantheatrecompany.org.

Q Health Do Flu Vaccines Cause the Flu?

by Lynn Beltran

lynn@qsaltlake.com

The answer is no. But let’s elaborate. The flu vaccine is designed to provide varying levels of immunity against the flu when someone is exposed. Basically, if you come in contact with someone who has the flu and you have been vaccinated, then you may not develop the flu yourself, or if you do become infected, having had the vaccine will likely lessen the length and severity of your illness. Influenza is most commonly spread when an infected person coughs or sneezes and others are exposed to the droplets of saliva or mucus carrying the virus. It is estimated that anywhere from 5-20 percent of the total population is infected with influenza each year, and over 200,000 people are hospitalized due to this illness. Complications from the flu such as pneumonia, dehydration, and sinus and ear infections may also occur in a portion of those infected. Having influenza may also worsen chronic conditions such as asthma, diabetes, heart disease, pulmonary disease and HIV/AIDS. Although health officials recommend that as many people as possible should get the flu vaccine each year, people in certain high risk populations (that is, those who are at higher risk for getting the illness) are especially encouraged to get their shots. Also, there are certain sub-population groups that should get the flu vaccine every year. These includes children aged 6 months to 5 years, anyone 50 years of age or older, pregnant women, caregivers to people with illnesses, childcare workers, and anyone with a chronic illness including HIV, asthma, diabetes, heart disease, pulmonary disease and many others. This is especially important for people with HIV/AIDS. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, research has shown an increased risk for heart and lung-related hospitalizations in people infected with HIV during influenza season as opposed to other times of the year. Even worse, HIV infected people are at a higher risk for influenza-related death than people who are HIV negative. Other studies have indicated that influenza symptoms can be prolonged and the risk of influenza-related complications can be higher for some HIV-infected people. There are two different types of flu vaccine, or rather, the vaccine is provided in two different forms. The most common form is referred to as the “flu shot” because that’s the form it comes in. But don’t worry, it’s just a small ouch! The shot is an inactivated vaccine, meaning the virus itself has

been rendered inactive but it triggers an active immune response. This is largely the reason for the myth that the vaccine can make you sick. But again, the flu shot does not cause the illness. However, as with many vaccines, it may trigger some general malaise or soreness, which is probably why people think it can make you sick. Because this vaccine is not a “live” vaccine, the flu shot is strongly recommended for anyone infected with HIV. The second form of immunization against influenza is a nasal spray called “flu mist.” This is a live attenuated vaccine which means a live virus that has been attenuated, or weakened, so it can no longer cause disease. This allows one to avoid the dreaded shot. Unfortunately, this is still a live virus, no matter how weak, so it’s important that people with HIV do not receive this form of vaccine or any other “live” vaccine. Even after all of this, you might still wonder why you should even bother with this vaccine. You may have had the flu in the past and well, you got through it. Even if you feel confident that you could endure another bout of this illness, remember that having an infectious disease can cause disease in others. Influenza is highly pathogenic, which means it can be spread to many people through casual contact. If you are not concerned that you won’t get through it if you become infected, there is the possibility that you may expose someone else who is immune compromised because they are very young, very old or have a chronic illness, including one that affects their immune systems. And they may end up hospitalized with more severe complications of influenza, or worse. If you have regular contact with anyone that is in a high risk category for influenza, then please think twice about protecting them from flu by protecting yourself. If you are interested in getting vaccinated for influenza, contact your medical provider. The Salt Lake Valley Health also offers both the flu shot and flu mist for $22. To get more information you can call the SLVHD immunization line at 468-2086. Q

HIV-infected people are at a higher risk for influenzarelated death than people who are HIV negative.

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NEAR UTAH PRIDE CENTER. 2 bed 2 ba duplex built in 1896. Beautifully landscaped. 329 W 500 N. $139,000. Leslie Thorup 455-6080

HEART of MARMALADE. 2-story conventional style single family 3 bed 2 ba home built in 1876 is ~2136 sq ft. Den/Office, Formal Dining. 326 Almond St, $289,999. 888-549-4517

9TH&9TH BUNGALOW 712 E 900 S. Incredible 1920 Bungalow in the Heart of 9th&9th. $399,900. Great for entertaining — Huge Gourmet Kitchen, 18’ sunroom, New 40yr roof, new furnace & A/C, all new plumbing. 2735 sq ft. 2 Bdrms,2 Bath, Study. Separate 900 sq ft art studio. MLS 741602 355-7175 or 867-7175

MARMALADE 1911 BUNGALOW. 3 bedrooms, remodeled kitchen, central air, hardwood floors. Tastefully updated, open floor plan w/calm colors. Great for entertaining. Large lot, covered porch and back patio. Detached garage. Gay area. Move in immediately. 256 W Reed Ave (750 North). $299,000. Call Benny at 201-5237.MLS 727500

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G s l f p a h a s t THINK YOU can’t af-m ford a downtown con-e do with all new every-U thing? Think again!r Marmalade Square condos have 1-2 bed floor plans with so many cool touches: ALL NEW windows & blinds, granite counters, kitchen cabinets, d/w, micro, gas stove, fridge, w/d, hdwd floors, private yards, gated community, pool, hot tub, gym, pets allowed,M $166,900–$193,900. Opena Mon-Sat 11am–2pm orb by appt, 600 N 244 West,f UtahLiving.com, Terrye Mitchell 347-0333 or Jen-F nifer Jackson 347-0333.w T M C $

MARMALADE 1900 R BUNGALOW. 2 Bed, b 1 Bath, Family Room t / Den, Semi Formal 1 Dining, Laundry. 222 L W. Fern (720 North). p $229,900. Call Sarah t Brown, 694-6679. t s a n p a r m R o w N

Great live/work space downtown with lock out feature, 747 sq ft approx, 2 bed, 1 bath, private yard, all new appointments, granite, hdwd floors, all appliances including w/d, assigned parking, pool, hot tub, gym, pets allowed, -must see, $174,900 sell-er will pay closing costs, UtahLiving.com, Ter!ry Jackson 801-347-0333. e d

Sugarhouse Beauty! This entire cottage has been completely remodeled - new roof, bathroom, fixtures, and new electrical. New bamboo floors, 2 tone paint and granite counters. All appliances are included. Gorgeous large .22acre landscaped yard and garden with 3,000 bulbs ready to come up in spring. 2-car garage. 2171 S Lake St, $218,000

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Capitol Hill Bungalow. 5 bdrm/3bath, 3,600+ sq. ft. Fplc., dishwasher, large laundry rm, wood floors, new roof, patio w/fountain, nice yard. Located in Marmalade â&#x20AC;&#x201D; dubbed a â&#x20AC;&#x153;gayborhoodâ&#x20AC;? of Salt Lake City â&#x20AC;&#x201D; near downtown. $679,000, call Jim or Chrisie at 801-532-7457 or 801-450-0757. More info at forsalebyowner.com, listing ID #21209961.

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t ,Marmalade Victorinan style 5 bed/3ba Home built in 1908 is ~2255 sq. ,ft. Bath-Sep Tub/Showyer, Office, Dishwasher, -Formal Dining, Hard.wood Floors, Jetted Tub, Kitchen-Updated, Master Bath, Vaulted Ceilings. 160 W 400 N. $348,000. Matt, 566-4411 MLS 727500

0 ROSE PARK Charming bungalow close to downtown and Capitol Hill. l 10-min walk to Gateway. 2 Large open porch, fireplace, French doors to h the living room. It features all new stainless steel appliances which are included and also new water heater, disposal, washer & dryer, and upstairs bath. Separate entrance to the basement with a 2nd kitchen. Room for a 2-car garage on the lot. 1-year home warranty included. 277 N 800 W, SLC, $164,900.

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Sooooo Charming Avenues Jewel! Condo over 600 sq ft 1 bed, 1 bath, new kitchen, counters, tile & appliances, maple floors, foyer, tons of closet space, stained leaded glass windows views of avenues, state capital, foothills & courtyard fountain, new paint, refurb. antique tub, vintage tile, tall ceilings, original pop out garden window, secured entry, HOA $150 includes all utilities, great full or part time downtown home, wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t last, $159,900. UtahLiving. com, Terry Mitchell 801-347-0333 or Jennifer Jackson 801-674-4669.

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Wizard Outed References to the Harry Potter

Across â&#x20AC;&#x2021; 1 Nuts â&#x20AC;&#x2021; 5 Loafer bottoms 10 Spice for your pickle 14 Barbraâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Funny Girl guy 15 City in the Osmondsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; home state 16 Protected, to seamen 17 â&#x20AC;&#x153;Eliâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Comingâ&#x20AC;? songwriter Laura 18 Had oral sex at home? 19 â&#x20AC;&#x153;___ Amâ&#x20AC;? (Melissa Etheridge title track) 20 Author of the Harry Potter books 23 Like the Fab Five 26 Fruity mixed drink 30 Not a single person 31 ___-mo sexual (decelerated porn)?

34 Tree trunks 35 Gaza Stripperâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s assn. 36 What gay bars and straight bars have in common 39 ___ Vegas (Liberace Museum locale) 40 Character recently â&#x20AC;&#x153;outedâ&#x20AC;? by 20-Across 43 Prefix for skin? 44 â&#x20AC;&#x153;So long!â&#x20AC;? 45 Key West cocktail ingredients 46 Opening parts? 48 www.gay.com, and others 49 NCAA home of the Bruins 52 Moby Dick chaser 54 Actor who plays 40Across 59 He comes between Tom and Harry

FOR RENT

HUGE 2 BEDROOMS, 850sqf. Luxury Doorman bldg. Great 4 share. Prime location. Air conditioning, Central heat, Walk-in closet, Hardwood floor, Living room, Dishwasher, Refrigerator, Stove/ Oven, Microwave, Granite countertop, Stainless steel appliances and every other accessories. E-mail me for pictures and more details :- Itrysohard37@yahoo.com aveS home 3 b e d , 2ba, wd flrs, frplc, w/d, new paint $1500/month +dep. 801-243-1733 No smk, no pets. Beautiful back yard.

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60 Like suspects in a Kevin Spacey movie 61 One with a tricky tongue 63 Russian river 64 Gay rodeo â&#x20AC;&#x153;lassoeeâ&#x20AC;? 65 Covet thy neighborâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ass, e.g. 66 Source of homosexuality, according to some 67 Shoot your wad 68 Actress Ione

Down â&#x20AC;&#x2021; 1 Happy Endings director Roos â&#x20AC;&#x2021; 2 Sedaris of Strangers with Candy â&#x20AC;&#x2021; 3 Way out â&#x20AC;&#x2021; 4 Condom used at Southern Cal? â&#x20AC;&#x2021; 5 You might pick one up in an alley â&#x20AC;&#x2021; 6 â&#x20AC;&#x153;... ___ take arms against ...â&#x20AC;? (Hamlet) â&#x20AC;&#x2021; 7 MGM cofounder

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_____ ____ ___ PUZZLE SOLUTIONS ARE ON PAGE 30

Whittaker

801â&#x20AC;&#x2018;463â&#x20AC;&#x2018;4828. Classifieds continue p. 30

â&#x20AC;&#x2021; 8 Like McKellenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Magneto â&#x20AC;&#x2021; 9 Male counterpart to a Seattle Storm player 10 Brand of bright pink 11 Land in la mer, for Debussy 12 ____ Miz 13 Non-Judy garland 21 They are prayed on at Metropolitan Community Church 22 Lord Byron, for one 23 Finish up moving in 24 Deodorant on a ball 25 Yogi Bearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s partner 27 Closet-emptying cry? 28 â&#x20AC;&#x153;Heavens to Betsy!â&#x20AC;? 29 Evaluate asses? 31 Andrew of Melrose Place 32 Material for a drag queen 33 â&#x20AC;&#x153;Walk ___â&#x20AC;? (Warwick hit)

37 It takes balls to make them in the NFL 38 Plug attachment 41 Prepare to take your pants off 42 Bounces like the New York Liberty 47 U. of San Francisco, e.g. 48 American Beauty director Mendes 50 Tearoom Trade author Humphreys and others 51 Greek fabulist 52 From the top 53 Compelled to go 54 Muckâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s partner 55 â&#x20AC;&#x153;___ do anything better than youâ&#x20AC;? 56 Go down on a hill 57 Porking noise? 58 â&#x20AC;&#x153;In the ___â&#x20AC;? (Village People hit) 59 Made a hole 62 Seed spilled by some farmers

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Q Puzzle

Sugarhouse. Desirable location. 2567 sq ft w/ finished basement. 3 bdrm 2 full bath, large backyard, freshly painted, ready to move in and make your own. $285,000. 2425 S. Dearborn, SLC. mls#726482. Reviewing all offers. Contact Mary at 661-3175, Keller Williams South Valley Realtors.

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Gaydar 101 by Joseph Dewey joseph@qsaltlake.com

I hate to say it, but if your gaydar is based on vibes, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s faulty. Hereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s why. Gay guys are vibe masters in three ways: â&#x20AC;˘ Are very receptive to vibes other people give off â&#x20AC;˘ Are adept at sending out vibes â&#x20AC;˘ Are a wealth of information about sex toys In other words, your vibe-centric gaydar is only going to work if the guy wants to give off a gay vibe. However, a closeted man, being the vibe expert he is, can give you any kind of vibe he wants, including a straight vibe. I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t ever get vibes from people â&#x20AC;&#x201D; Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m straight, after all. But I still wanted to develop gaydar, just for fun. So I bought a few books that ended up just being sweeping statements about stereotypes of gay guys instead of ways I could get a gaydar. It was only when I was reading an unrelated book, You Just Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t Understand by Deborah Tannen, about interactions between extremely straight women and extremely straight men, that I realized how to develop vibe-free gaydar â&#x20AC;&#x201D; a scientific approach to gaydar, if you will. Tannen aptly makes hundreds of generalizations about ultra-straight men and ultra-straight women, and I realized two of her observations about straight women also directly apply to gay men. First, how two people face each other in conversation. Two straight guys conversing will face away from each other so theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re almost parallel, and focus on an imaginary point on a wall about 20 feel in front of them. The guys slouch, maybe even to the point of recumbence. They do not make eye contact. Two straight women do almost the opposite. They sit with very good posture directly facing each other, while maintaining very good eye contact. Straight guys donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t face each other because they see that kind of interaction as conflict, as sizing each other up for a possible fight. By having very relaxed, non-threatening conversation, a straight guy is saying, â&#x20AC;&#x153;I respect you, I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t want to fight you, so Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m standing down, reclining and focusing on

Solutions from page 29

Cryptogram: Gutenberg! THE MUSICAL IS A ROMP.

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Q Sex

this imaginary point on the wall.â&#x20AC;? Straight women face each other because they see interaction as building a relationship. By having a very equal, balanced interaction while looking each other in the eyes, a straight woman says, â&#x20AC;&#x153;I respect you. I consider you an equal, so Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m treating you as an equal by directly facing you instead of focusing on an imaginary point on the wall.â&#x20AC;? I often see this happening between a straight man and a straight woman in a restaurant. The man is on his seat, slouched, facing away from the woman. The woman is sitting upright, facing the man. Generally speaking, gay dudes are lovers, not fighters. And almost every gay guy Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve met is a genuinely nice person with a deep respect for everyone around him. I think itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s because of this respect that gay men fit the model of straight women as far as having an equal, direct stance in conversation. Note this only works when two people are talking to each other in a comfortable environment. When there are three or more people or if the environment isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t comfortable, the model changes. Second, letâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s look at posture. Straight men can have good posture, but they really only show it when theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re in a fight with someone, thinking theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re superior to someone or trying to seduce someone. Never when staring at an imaginary point on the wall. Straight women, on the other hand, have excellent posture all of the time. This is the other thing straight women and gay men have in common. Take those bendy pipe cleaners and make stick figure models of everyone in the room. Chop the modelsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; arms off at the elbows so youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re not distracted by hand gestures. Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll notice your models of straight women and gay men are exactly the same, especially the spines. These two methods strip away all of the clichĂŠd gaydar signs, such as hand gestures, lisps, attention to skin care, product in the hair and a tendency to kiss every guy he meets. Of course, I realize any attempt at quantifying gaydar is really generalizing. And generalizations are always wrong. But these two methods, here in 2007 in Utah, will make your gaydar about 90 percent effective. As far as lesbian-dar, I canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t help you much. The only generalities Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve found true about lesbians are: lesbians tend to have short fingernails and walk very confidently. Take that as you will. Q

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