QSaltLake Magazine - January 08, 2009

issue 119 January 8, 2009

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In This Issue

2 blocks west of Redwood Road

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Queer Guide to the Film Festivals. . . . 20 Park City. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 25 Queer Lounge. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 28

News

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World. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 4 Quips & Quotes. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 6 Local. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 8 Qmmunity. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 9 Sports. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 34

Views

From the Editor. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 4 Snaps & Slaps . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 12 Ruby Ridge. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 14 Queer Gnosis. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 16 Gay Geeks. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 19

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T R E VOR SOU T HE Y T H E

E A R L Y

Y E A R S

A N D

R E C E N T

W O R K

“From Fairy Queens to Warriors”

“THE FAIRY QUEEN” — 1947

MAKSIM — “WARRIORS” — 2003

January 3rd–14th, 2009, 1–8pm Thomas Kearns McCarthey Gallery 444 Main Street, Park City, Utah

Wine and cheese reception with the artist and special guests Friday, January 9, 7–9pm Free Warriors posters, with a portion of sales to benefit Equality Utah

DABAKIS-JUSTESEN F I N E

W W W. D J FA . C O M

|

A R T

W W W.T R E V O R S O U T H E Y. C O M

KEVIN GUZIK

From the Editor

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Another 2009 Predictions Article

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Gay Wedding Announcements are FREE in QSaltLake.

Call 649-6663

doing a 2009 predictions issue.

So ... I decided I at least had to do a column about it. Consider yourself spared from 44 pages of them ... well, 43½.

Utah will pass a gay ­marriage bill.

Yes, it will be overturned in 2010, but Sen. Chris Buttars will sponsor a bill in the 2008 legislative session to ban all cohabitation by unmarried people in the state of Utah. The bill will sail through the Senate Committee, where Sen. Scott McCoy will introduce a one-word amendment to the bill which will competely change the bill’s affect to be 180 degrees from Buttars’ intentions. No one in the legislature or mainstream media will catch McCoy’s intent and the bill will sail through both the Senate and the House. Gayle Ruzicka will be flummoxed over why Utah’s gay community will be completely silent on the issue.

All of Utah’s news ­personalities will come out.

Yes, each and every one of them.

Well, except for Fox 13’s Dan Evans.

He will wait until 2011. Damon Yummy ... I mean Yauney ... will lead the pack, announcing his marriage plans (in Utah) with Big Budha. Anderson Cooper will be so moved by the courage and honesty of the reddest of red states’ media, he will come out and reveal that he has been in a 13-year marriage with Ryan Seacrest, who will deny the revelation.

Cher will Come out of ­retirement.

Okay, so this one is so cheating.

You have to throw in a few obvious ones just so people will know you are completely right on-track.

Club Jam will get their Liquor License.

After years of fighting the club, the polygamist neighbors on Reed Avenue will find out that 14 of their 21 boys and seven of their 19 girls are gay and lesbian, respectively. After a month of pandemonium, the parents leading the charge against the uber-chic club will suddenly welcome it with open arms.

Mayor Ralph Becker will pretend like he stepped in to make the deal and will cut the pink ribbon on the liquor cabinets behind the bar.

Six more non-gay clubs will announce a gay night.

Straight guys and gals will stop drinking alcohol because of the

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economy and the fact that they have to feed and clothe their children.

Trails will block out the “R” on their sign on Wednesdays. After winning a stay on their building’s demolition, Port-O-Call will change their “Food · Ghosts · Fun” neon to “Food · Gays · Fun” and other bars will move their entrances to the rear.

Larry Miller will dedicate one theatre in each megaplex location to queer films.

While in the hospital, Miller will have a revelation that he was wrong back in the days of Brokeback Mountain and will pay penance by introducing Utah to bad gay cinema.

The Mormon Church Will fold.

Activists bent (or is that bent activists?) on challenging the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints’ tax exempt status will convince a (gay) IRS agent and the church will be forced to close its doors under the tax burden. The Salt Lake City Temple will be converted into a gay club known as “Tinkerbell’s Castle” and the Church Office Building will be sold to the Utah Pride Center. The lesbian-heavy board will roll their eyes at the phallic nature of the building, but okay the move anyway in a split vote. “Our Store” will take over operation of Deseret Industries.

Karl Rove will Change Sides.

Seeing the downfall of the Republican Party, Karl Rove will notice a significant cut in pay and seek a more lucrative gig on the liberal side of the isle. The Green Party then trounces all races in 2010 and gains control of the House and the Senate.

Prop 8 is overturned by a 98 percent vote.

California voters will suddenly notice that their ballots were misprinted and, as reported by The Onion, Proposition 8 required that all marriages were to be between “one man and one wolfman.” All marriages in the state but one are nullified and the measure goes up for a revote.

QSaltLake wins a Nobel Prize in literature.

JoSelle Vanderhooft is awarded a Nobel Prize for her work on “Gay Geeks.” We later find out that the gay geeks of the world conspired to manipulate the computerized voting in her favor and she is disqualified, but only after cashing the check.

I know that each and every prediction here will come true. Q

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Q World

BY REX WOCKNER

New Gay-friendly Laws Take Effect in Calif.

New laws that took effect in California Jan. 1 protect GLBT seniors and foster youth, and insert “sexual orientation” and “gender identity” language into several civil rights laws that lacked comprehensive lists of protected groups.

Assembly Bill 3015 requires that existing mandatory training programs for foster-care administrators, foster parents and other caregivers include training on the right of foster youth to a safe, unbiased and harassment-free school environment.

Senate Bill 1729 requires that licensed health professionals in senior care facilities and nursing homes be trained in the unique needs of GLBT seniors.

Assembly Bill 2654 amended 13 statutes that prohibit discrimination against members of protected classes.

Nine of the amendments apply to insurance and four relate to a government benefit, service or requirement.

“The list of protected classes varies from statute to statute — and many did not include sexual orientation and/or gender identity prior to AB 2654,” said Equality California’s government affairs director, Alice Kessler. “(With this bill and others,) we’ve essentially overhauled all major civil rights laws in California to include sexual orientation and gender identity. California is the only state we know of to have undergone such a process to systematically include sexual orientation and gender identity throughout all state law.”

Since its founding in December 1998, Equality California has sponsored 50 bills that have passed the California Legislature, “taking California from a state with little to no legal protections for LGBT people to one with some of the most comprehensive protections in the nation,” the organization said.

Forty-two of the 50 bills were signed into law by a governor.

Meanwhile, gay and lesbian members of the Legislature assumed key positions in important committees in December, EQCA reported.

Sen. Christine Kehoe, D-San Diego, is now chair of the Senate Appropriations Committee; Sen. Mark Leno, D-San Francisco, heads the Senate Public Safety Committee; and Assemblymember John A. Perez, D-Los Angeles, chairs the Assembly Democratic Caucus.

The Legislature’s fourth openly gay member is Assemblymember Tom Ammiano, D-San Francisco, who was elected to the post Nov. 4 after serving 14 years on the San Francisco Board of Supervisors.

Rep. Frank blasts Rice for snubbing gays at UN

U.S. Rep. Barney Frank, D-Mass., wrote to U.S. Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice on Dec. 23 “strongly objecting” to the refusal by the U.S. Mission to the United Nations to join 66 other nations Dec. 18 in signing a statement affirming that international human rights protections include sexual orientation and gender identity.

It was the first time a statement condemning rights abuses against GLBT people was presented in the General Assembly. The declaration was read into the record by Argentine Ambassador Jorge Argüello.

Frank wrote: “Compounding the administration’s failure to join virtually all of the other countries that genuinely believe in human rights in opposing acts of bigotry, the U.N. mission under your supervision issued a strikingly hypocritical justification.

According to The New York Times on Friday, unnamed ‘American diplomats and legal experts’ incredibly said that you could not support this because ‘it might be interpreted as an attempt by the federal government to override the states’ rights on issues like gay marriage.’ I assume you are aware that the administration of which you are a part on several occasions sent to Congress and pressed for passage of a constitutional amendment that would have done exactly what this statement claims you and the administration are opposed to: the constitutional amendment on marriage would not only have taken away the states’ rights to decide about same-sex marriage, it would have retroactively cancelled thousands of marriages that had occurred between loving people.”

The statement by the 66 countries affirmed “the principle of non-discrim-

Quips & Quotes ❝ ❝If Chris Buttars won’t say it ... we will: Happy

Holidays! Best wishes!

—Utah Legal Clinic Staff” —A sign in the window of the Utah Legal Clinic referring to Republican West Jordan Sen. Chris Buttars’ support of a legislative resolution urging Utahns to say “Merry Christmas” instead of “Happy Holidays.”

❝ ❝If we all ‘come out’ to each other, it truly will be a happy New Year.”

ination, which requires that human rights apply equally to every human being regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity,” and denounced “violence, harassment, discrimination, exclusion, stigmatization and prejudice ... because of sexual orientation or gender identity.” It also called for the decriminalization of gay sex, which is banned in at least 77 nations and punishable by death in at least seven.

Fifty-seven nations signed an alternative statement, promoted by the Organization of the Islamic Conference, that said universal human rights do not include “the attempt to focus on the rights of certain persons” because “the notion of orientation spans a wide range of personal choices that expand way beyond the individual’s sexual interest in copulatory behavior with normal consenting adult human beings, thereby ushering in the social normalization, and possibly legitimization of many deplorable acts.”

The U.S. did not sign either statement.

Campbell Soup Stands by Advocate Ads Against Ultra-conservative Groups Despite criticism from the American Family Association over “openly ... helping homosexual activists push their agenda,” the Campbell Soup Company plans to continue advertising in the Advocate.

The company ran two pages of ads in the December and January issues.

One ad shows a lesbian couple, owners of a New York restaurant, and their young son with a box of the company’s Swanson Broth and a bowl of the restaurant’s butternut squash bisque. Text identifies them as a couple, mentions their son and gives the recipe for the bisque. The other ads feature New York City chefs.

In late December, company spokesman Anthony Sanzio told Advertising

6 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 119 | J a nua r y 8 , 20 09

Age that Swanson will run additional ads in the Advocate.

“Inclusion and diversity play an important role in our business,” he said. “For more than a century, people from all walks of life have enjoyed Campbell’s products, and we will continue to try to communicate in ways that are meaningful and relevant to them.”

The Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation is urging supporters of the ads to contact Campbell and its Swanson division because, “unfortunately, they will be hearing from the AFA and their supporters, who want to make our families and our lives invisible.” For additional information, see tinyurl.com/gaysoup.

—Boyer Jarvis, a prominent straight ally, urging gay Utahns to help end anti-gay discrimination by coming out to loved ones as being pro-gay in a letter to the Salt Lake Tribune.

❝ ❝Our movement has a long history of respectfully engaging with those who would deny our basic humanity and civil rights.

Let’s hope the church’s claims are more than just a political posture.”

—Bruce Bastian, local gay philanthropist in an email to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints urging the church to support Equality Utah’s Common Ground Initiative.

Bastian’s was one of 27,000 letters delivered to the church’s headquarters on Dec. 27.

❝ ❝I’d like to have no special right, but the same rights as everyone else.”

—Snyderville Basin resident Lynn Barck, telling the Park Record why she participated in the Light Up the Night candlelight vigil for gay rights in Park City on Dec. 20.

❝ ❝Twenty participants braved 5- to 10-degree

temperatures to walk, talk and hand out fliers to passersby on Main Street in Park City! Participants ranged in age from high school students to a heterosexual couple celebrating their 28th wedding anniversary. ...

The response from residents and visitors to Park City was overwhelmingly positive. Many expressed dismay at the lack of civil rights for LGBT people in Utah and other states.”

—Mark Worthen, Park City resident and Light Up the Night organizer, writing about the vigil on its Web page at jointheimpact.wetpaint.com.

Celebrating Common Ground: The Arts Community Supports Equality Saturday, January 17, 8:00 pm Black Box @ Rose Wagner Benefiting Equality Utah’s Common Ground Initiative $10 Suggested Donation Reservations can be made at equalityutah.org Featuring performances by

DAVID DANIELS

Q Utah

Qmmunity Wine and Cheese for Equality

Common Ground Rally Scheduled for Capitol On Jan. 24 gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender Utahns and their straight allies are invited to gather on Capitol Hill in support of six bills aimed at securing more rights for gay and transgender Utahns and to call on President-elect Barack Obama to repeal a number of anti-gay measures.

Organizer and gay-rights activist Jacob Whipple said that participants will meet on the west lawn of the City County Building (451 S State St) and marching up State Street to the Capitol’s south lawn. Once there, they will call on legislators to pass bills aimed at securing equal workplace protections for gay and transgender Utahns, rights for same-sex partners to sue in cases of wrongful death and a repeal of a 2000 law forbidding gay couples from adopting children, among other things. They will also ask Obama for his support in passing a federal Employment Nondiscrimination Act and in repealing the military’s “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy and the Defense of Marriage Act, which forbids the U.S. government from recognizing gay marriage and allows states the option of not recognizing gay marriages performed in other states.

Whipple said that many locals have expressed excitement about the rally.

“All the people that recognize me from the news or even friends are always asking me when the next event will be,” he said. “So I gather that in our community and [among] those who support us, they are excited for this to continue on. They want [these issues] to remain in the news and to be an important issue and topic on the state and federal level.”

Although Whipple’s activism, like that of many gay and transgender people across the country, was touched off by the passage of California’s Proposition 8, Whipple stressed that this rally, unlike others held in Utah last November, would not be about the controversial measure which rebanned gay marriage in the Bay State.

“It’s not just about venting our feelings anymore,” he said. “This is about actually speaking to our representatives and legislators and telling them we need them to make these changes.”

For more information visit allforoneinitiative. org.

Artist Trevor Southey will hold a wine and cheese reception at his retrospective show “From Fairy Queens to Warriors.” A portion of all art sales will benefit Equality Utah’s efforts to pass the Common Ground Initiative, a set of six legislative bills aimed at securing equal rights for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender Utahns. No RSVP is required.

When: Jan. 9, 7:00 – 9:00 p.m.

Where: Thomas Kearns McCarthey Gallery, 444 Main St., Park City

ROTC Twirls into 2009 with Open House to Invite New Members For the past three years the Righteously Outrageous Twirling CorpsSalt Lake City have wowed audiences in and out of state with their fancy flag and footwork.

And now you, too, can join their ranks.

On Feb. 5, the color guard performance corps will hold an open house at Our Store: Your Thrift Alternative to give would-be performers, sponsors and all-around fans of their work information about what they do and a preview of their plans for 2009.

“It’s basically how we kick off our season,” explained Logan Brueck, ROTC-SLC’s director.

Although ROTC-SLC can only accept volunteers and performers age 18 and over, Brueck stressed that no experience is needed to join up.

“If you have no experience you’ll start off on flag,” he explained, meaning that newcomers begin by learning how to spin the colorful flags the group use in performances. He added that experience is, of course, welcome and that people who have experience in baton-twirling or spinning the wooden rifles that are a staple of color guards everywhere are especially welcome.

This coming year, Brueck said that the troupe will be learning a new technique — how to spin sabers.

“We’re also thinking about maybe starting a squad of flag dancers,” said Brueck, adding that this technique is similar to Maori poi ball spinning, only using hand-spun flags instead of weighted balls.

“We have a few people who can teach it, and if there’s enough interest we will make it part of the troupe,” said Brueck.

As in years past, Brueck said that ROTC-SLC has big plans for 2009.

These include not only performing at a number of events in Utah’s gay community like the Utah Pride Festival, but traveling to Las Vegas to perform

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in Sin City’s own Gay Pride Festival.

The event is an important one for the troupe, said Brueck, and one in which they’ve performed very well. In 2007, ROTC-SLC took second place overall and won best overall in 2008. Their routines in the Utah Pride Parade have also won the accolades.

“Vegas is going to be a big thing for us again this year,” said Brueck.

He added that the group is looking at chartering a bus for the trip down and selling seats to non-members.

“It’s a bit like the QSaltLake Fabulous Fun Bus,” he said. “ We’ll have two Cyber Sluts with us to do bingo.”

Another “big thing” for the corps this year will be the routines. So far, Brueck said they plan on learning a routine set to Doris Day’s “Perhaps, Perhaps, Perhaps,” Gwen Stefani’s “Wind It Up” and Elvis’ “Viva Las Vegas” for their Vegas performance.

Other possibilities for music include the Scissor Sisters’ “I Don’t Feel Like Dancing.” The Royal Court of the Golden Spike Empire’s Viscountess Korynne Kidman will also lip-sync to one of the songs.

For people who are interested in ROTC-SLC’s work but who don’t feel comfortable twirling flags, rifles or sabers, Brueck said that the group also needs several “behind the scenes” people, including “roadies” to help them when they travel out of state to perform. And, of course, individuals and businesses interested in sponsoring the corps are always welcome.

Equipment such as flags and rifles will also be available at the open house for interested parties to use.

ROTC-SLC will hold its first rehearsal on Feb. 11.

The open house will be held Feb. 5 in Our Store: Your Thrift Alternative’s meeting room (358 S 300 E) starting at 7:00 p.m. For more information about the corps visit rotcslc.com.

Gay Men’s Winter Retreat Gay men’s spirituality group Queer Spirit will hold its winter retreat this month. The three-day retreat uses ceremony, celebration and experiential workshops to help gay men discard “old stories” (belief systems that no longer serve them) and create “new stories” (healthier belief systems) to help them strengthen their relationships with other gay men and improve their self-esteem.

Pre-registration is required.

When: Jan. 9 – 11 WHERE: Windwalker Ranch, Spring City Info: (801) 557-9203 or jerrybuie@ mac.com

Free HIV Testing The Tri-State HIV/AIDS Task Force is offering free rapid HIV testing at the Doctors Free Clinic in St. George, Utah. Results are available in 15 minutes.

When: Jan. 10, 10 a.m. – 12 p.m.

Where: Doctors Free Clinic, 1036 E Riverside Dr., St. George

Amplify at the Center The Utah Pride Center has launched Amplify, a grass-roots movement for queer justice, and an online resource for gay rights activists and allies in Utah. This blog offers news stories and information on upcoming events, such as rallies, marches, meetings and talks centered on gay rights. It is also the home to the Center’s Media Moderating Program, a team that monitors Utah’s print, broadcast and internet media sources to ensure what the Center calls “fair and inclusive coverage” of gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people. This program is also currently looking for volunteers.

Info: amplifyutah.wordpress.com, doug@utahpridecenter.org

A March for Equality in Moab

By Brad Di Iorio

Grass-roots Utahns for Marriage Equality plans a march and rally to the Delicate Arch in Arches National Park, Saturday, Jan. 10. A caravan will be leaving from the Utah Pride Center’s Café Marmalade at 7:00 a.m.

Expected to speak are Rep. Christine Johnson; Claudia Bradshaw, founder of the St. George chapter of PFLAG; and Matthew Landis, local Salt Lake City resident.

“We will be also rallying in support of Equality Utah’s Common Ground Initiative,” co-founder Michael Mueller said. “This initiative is a package of six bills that will be taken to the Utah Legislature in January. These bills are basic protections for gay and transgender Utahns, and we need your help to get them passed. Those bills concern Expanding Healthcare, Fair Workplace, Fair Housing, Wrongful Death, Domestic Partner Rights and Responsibilities Act, and Clarifying Amendment 3.”

The rally will begin at 1:00 p.m. at Arches National Park. Admission to the park is free until noon if you identify yourself as part of the ‘Utahns for Marriage Equality’ group. Only handheld signs and banners will be allowed, with no signs attached to sticks.

A special overnight rate of $20 per person will be available at the golf course condos. An after party at Eddie McStiff’s Restaurant and Bar has been planned from 6:00 p.m. to midnight.

Local musicians Cosy Sheridan, TR Ritchie and Stonefed will perform at McStiff’s. Also, a 20 percent discount for any purchase will be honored at Wicked Brew Espresso on Moab’s Main Street.

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An evening with “a skilled purveyor of sophisticated twang” UtahFM presents

carrie rodrıguez

For more information go to the facebook page for Utahns for Marriage Equality. To reserve condo space or arrange or offer rides in a car, email marchforequality09@ gmail.com.

Queer Book Club to Roll its Rs Queereads, a gay and lesbian book club, will be discussing R. Zamora Linmark’s Rolling the R’s on Wednesday, Jan. 21st.

“This is a really fantastic book that will undoubtedly take your mind off of cold, dreary Utah and drop you off in 1970’s Hawaii!” said Adam Streeter, the group’s moderator.

Since the book is a fairly obscure title, supply at Sam Weller’s is going to be limited. Those wanting to buy the book to read can find it online at abebooks.com or through a link at QSaltLake.com.

The discussion will take place in the lower level of Sam Weller’s Zion Bookstore, 254 S. Main Street.

Sunday, January 18

One night only at Rose Wagner. $35 general admission.

$75 vip includes a drink, meal, soundcheck access and meet-and-greet.

21+. Only 250 tickets available.

Tickets on sale beginning December 22nd at 801-355-ARTS or ArtTix.org

Q Utah Adoption Bill to Return to Capitol Hill

Later this month, a bill seeking to repeal a 2000 law forbidding gay and lesbian couples (and indeed all unmarried couples) from adopting children will return to the legislature to make a second attempt at being heard by legislators.

Sponsored by Rep. Rebecca ChavezHouck, D-Salt Lake City, the Forever Homes for Every Child bill made its first appearance in 2008, but did not make it out of committee and onto the House floor for debate. This year the bill is returning alongside the Common Ground Initiative, a set of six bills sponsored by gay rights group Equality Utah that seek to secure more rights for gay and transgender Utahns.

The initiative (so named because of its attempt to find agreement with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latterday Saints on protections for gay and transgender people) includes bills seeking to extend housing and employment nondiscrimination protections to gay and transgender people; allow same-sex partners to sue in the case of wrongful death; and mandate public employer insurance plans to cover married spouse and domestic partners equally. Two additional bills seek to create a statewide domestic partner registry and clarify language in Utah’s constitutional gay marriage

ban that lawmakers have argued forbids any legal recognition of same-sex couples in the state.

Although Chavez-Houck’s bill is not an official part of the initiative, Equality Utah helped draft it in 2008 and is lending its support to the bill again this legislative session.

Debbie and Reanna Thompson are among the many same-sex Utah couples with children who are watching the Common Ground Initiative — and particularly the Forever Homes bill — with interest and some anxiety.

The Thompsons married in Montreal, Canada in 2004 and conceived their 2-year-old son Liam in 2007 with the help of a sperm donor. Like nearly all such couples in the state they are faced with the following predicament: Debbie, Liam’s non-biological parent, is a legal stranger to her son. Under Utah law, Reanna’s mother, from whom the couple are estranged and who has never met Liam, has more rights to the child than the woman he calls “Mama.” “[Reanna’s mother] would have first claim to this child if something happened to Reanna,” said Debbie. “According to the state of Utah, it would be better for my son to go into foster care or to go to a woman he’s never met than to stay with me. It’s incredibly punitive and vindictive and it’s one of the most frustrating things, and it’s scary to me. I don’t think anything will happen, but it certainly could.”

Although the couple is fortunate enough to have an employer who covers the family under one insurance plan, Debbie says that she still has to carry a copy of the couple’s legal guardianship agreement with her at all times. And even though the papers prove the couple’s intent to raise Liam together, they lack the full force a legal adoption would provide.

“It’s terrifying that somebody might say you don’t have the right to permit

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medical treatment or pick this child up from daycare,” said Debbie. “I always feel like I’m on the edge of being a full parent, a real parent.”

In fact, Debbie recalls that one lawyer the couple seeked in trying to secure protections for their son recommended that Reanna give up all rights to her biological child and allow Debbie to become his legal guardian.

“Which is a horrible thing to ask the mother to do,” said Debbie.

Although the couple was not able to advocate for Chavez-Houck’s bill last year thanks to the rigors of raising a newborn child, they both say they will be very involved this year. They have already asked friends and family to write their representatives and local newspapers in support of the bill to “talk about the position that this punitive law has put us in.”

If passed, Chavez-Houck’s bill could put not only same-sex couples with children but the Utah Division of Child and Family Services in a better position. According to the Salt Lake Tribune, Utah currently has 2,600 foster children and half that number of foster homes. Currently DCFS has 454 children it is seeking to place in permanent homes.

DCFS Director Duane Betournay

told the paper that his department would prefer to look at unmarried, cohabiting parents “on a case-by-case basis” to determine if placing a child with such couples would be in that child’s best interest.

“To limit the number of homes we have available to us for possible adoption doesn’t really make sense in light of the number of children who we have in foster care awaiting adoption,” he said.

Chavez-Houck’s bill would still allow the state and private agencies to prefer married couples as adoptive or foster parents, and would allow such couples to adopt or foster a child with his or her biological parent(s)’ consent, or if that child is in the state’s care. It would also not interfere with the rights of single adults of any sexual orientation to adopt a child if a married couple is unavailable. Q

Gay Activist Claims SL Tribune Pulls Pro-Gay Ad Utah businessman Bruce Palenske claims that the Salt Lake Tribune and Deseret Morning News pulled a full page ad he placed that criticized the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints over its role in the passage of Proposition 8 that bans gay marriage in California.

“We have a signed contract, and the newspapers had already accepted payment for the ad when it was pulled literally five minutes before the production deadline,” Palenske told Gay Rights Watch. “This is clearly political. I’ve placed millions of dollars worth of ads with these two papers over the years, and this is the first time something like this has ever happened. I can’t help but think that the LDS [Church] came in and put the brakes on this.”

According to an article in the Tribune, Palenske had agreed to pay

$2,000 to run a full-page ad in the Sunday, Dec. 28 issues of the Tribune and Deseret News, according to a contract supplied by his spokesman, Sal Peralta. But on the previous Friday, the deadline for placing Sunday ads, Palenske was told the rate would be $10,000.

Brent Low, president and chief executive officer of MediaOne of Utah, which handles advertising for both newspapers, said the original ad price was “misquoted,” and, “a manager caught the error and corrected the rate,” according to the Tribune story.

The ad, that has run in the Park City Record, states that approximately 70 percent of the funding for Prop 8 — more than $25 million — came through the efforts of the LDS Church, and asks people to contact the Internal Revenue Service to lodge a complaint.

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BRIAN GORDON

Fabulous Person Dominique Storni: ‘Gopher’ Extraordinaire

by JoSelle Vanderhooft

Dominique Storni has been a visible and well-known figure in Utah’s gay community, speaking at rallies, demonstrating against anti-gay legislation or simply educating others about transgender issues.

But this month, Storni will turn her energy and volunteering spirit to a different venue: Queer Lounge at the Sundance Film Festival — although her role may surprise those who are used to seeing her in front of a crowd of protesters.

“I’m a gopher,” she laughs.

Along with several volunteer friends, Storni spends the second half of January picking up groceries and alcohol for the Lounge, or shuttling the gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender filmmakers who participate on its many panels to and from the airport. She has been “helping out where I can” at Queer Lounge since its second year in 2005.

“They’re such good people and the cause is so brilliant that all of us [volunteers] just do it out of the love of our hearts,” she says of the Lounge.

“What I saw that was so beautiful about Queer Lounge was its mission ... to bring queer filmmakers together so they can network and bring out more queer films. And some of the projects I’ve seen come through there are phenomenal,” she adds, naming the 2007 documentary on homosexuality and religion For the Bible Tells Me So and Transgeneration, an eight-part documentary following the transitioning of four transgender college students as personal favorites.

“It’s not just queer film, but [way] the Lounge presents itself, and the panels [founder] Ellen [Huang] has been able to put together really have shed so much light on our community,” Storni continues.

It’s a goal that Storni can certainly identify with. For the past decade she has been trying to shed light on transgender issues for cisgender (nontransgender) people. Born in Ogden as a boy at the same hospital that delivered Donny and Marie Osmond, Storni spent much of her youth living in the southwest United States and in Guadalajara, Mex., where she took general education college classes while studying the country’s anthropology and history. She is still fluent in Spanish.

“I kind of moved around living with friends,” she says of that time. “A lot of the moving around I did was before I came out, when I was married. I was

more trying to run away from the inevitable.” To explain what she means, Storni quotes her favorite author, Sor Juana Inés de la Cruz, a 17th Century Mexican nun, poet and scholar who often felt constrained by the social limitations placed on her because of her sex.

“She talked about running away, she wanted to become educated,” Storni explains.

“She said, ‘I tried to run away, but in that effort I took with me my worst enemy, I took me with me.’ What she said resonates so strongly with me. I think a lot of the moving around I did was trying to run away from myself and being afraid of who and what I was. I didn’t fit the Mormon mould that I was given growing up. I didn’t fit into society’s mould, you know.”

Finally, the pressures of trying to fit into society’s mould became too much and Storni attempted suicide in 1995. After her first attempt, she and her wife separated and divorced the following year. It was a dark time for Storni, who entered inpatient hospitalization after another attempt.

“I like to call it reparative therapy,” she says of the treatment she underwent at that time. “Even though it wasn’t necessarily defined as that, the actions taken in therapy were very reminiscent of that. I haven’t had shock therapy but I’ve had some things that are very similar, some aversion therapy techniques that were very invasive.” At last, Storni accepted her identity as a transgender lesbian and decided “it was just time for me to live my truth.”

“But being a trans woman who identifies as a lesbian created a whole new conundrum I had no idea I would have to face,” Storni says, recalling the trouble she often had fitting in with the local lesbian community, or even getting other gay people to understand that gender identification and sexual orientation weren’t the same. Still, she made many “incredible lesbian” friends who “took me under their wing and were very supportive,” including local singer Mary Tebbs and lawyer Jane Marquardt.

At this time, Storni also found her calling: educating people (specifically gays, lesbians and bisexuals) about transgender issues. In November of 2001 and with the help and support of the Utah Pride Center she started

The Transgender Awareness Month at the Center, a month of panel discussions, film screenings and other events centered around the experience of being transgender and creating more visibility for transgender people in the broader queer community. Now in its seventh year, the event is a yearly feature on the Center’s calendar.

Storni says she is pleased to see how Transgender Awareness Month has grown, and thrilled to see a new generation of transgender activists stepping up.

“TransAction is a brilliant idea,” she says of the new group at the Utah Pride Center for organized and run by transgender youth (under 24) and their allies.

When not busy serving the community as an activist and educator (or chasing down lunches for hungry filmmakers at Queer Lounge), Storni says she enjoys camping with a local lesbian singles group and is “kind of addicted to TV,” which she says can often help her unwind and recharge after speaking in front of a large crowd.

“When I go out and do my activism it really drains me emotionally, so I have to come and hide for awhile so I can recharge myself so I can do more,” explains Storni, adding that she has social anxiety disorder, a fact which she says may surprise people because of how outgoing and outspoken she can be.

She also likes spending time with the three sons and three daughters from her previous marriage. Although Storni says she is currently getting reacquainted with her daughters (who remained in Texas with her ex-wife after the divorce), her sons have been a major part of her life since her transitioning.

“It was really difficult for awhile

BEER NUT inc.

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n the past decade,

[while I was transitioning], but now my sons are very supportive and gay affirming,” she says of them, noting that one son even founded a group to protest Proposition 8, the controversial measure that re-banned gay marriage in California in November. “If it wasn’t for my sons, I would be dead.”

Whether speaking out against Proposition 8, talking about transgender rights or helping to put Queer Lounge together, Storni says that she does her best to encourage people to work together regardless of sexual orientation, gender identity, race, age or any other quality that often divides individuals. Only when gay and transgender people can put aside “personality for principle” can they move forward, says Storni.

“We need to reach across the aisle to each other,” she says. Q

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J a nua r y 9, 20 0 9 | issue 119 | QSa lt L a k e | 11

Q Views Proposition 8 Broke Our Hearts, but It Did Not End Our Fight

By Joe Solmonese

Like many in our movement, I found myself in Southern California last weekend. There, I had the opportunity to speak with a man who said that Proposition 8 completely changed the way he saw his own neighborhood. Every ‘Yes on 8’ sign was a slap. For this man, for me, for the 18,000 couples who married in California, to LGBT people and the people who love us, its passage was worse than a slap in the face. It was nothing short of heartbreaking.

But it is not the end. Fifty-two percent of the voters of California voted to deny us our equality on Nov. 4, but they did not vote our families or the power of our love out of existence; they did not vote us away.

As free and equal human beings, we were born with the right to equal families. The courts did not give us this right — they simply recognized it. And although California has ceased to grant us marriage licenses, our rights are not subject to anyone’s approval. We will keep fighting for them. They are as real and as enduring as the love that moves us to form families in the first place. There are many roads to marriage equality, and no single roadblock will prevent us from ultimately getting there.

And yet there is no denying, as we pick ourselves up after losing this most recent, hard-fought battle, that we’ve been injured, many of us by neighbors who claim to respect us. We see them in the supermarkets, on the sidewalk, and think “how could you?”

By the same token, we know that we are moving in the right direction. In 2000, California voters passed Proposition 22 by a margin of 61.4 to 38.6 percent. On Nov. 4, fully 48 percent of Californians rejected Proposition 8. It wasn’t enough, but it was a massive shift. Nationally, although two other anti-marriage ballot measures won, Connecticut defeated an effort to hold a constitutional convention ending marriage, New York’s state legislature gained the seats necessary to consider a marriage law, and FMA architect Marilyn Musgrave lost her seat in Congress. We also elected a president who supports protecting the entire com-

munity from discrimination and who opposes discriminatory amendments.

Yet on Proposition 8 we lost at the ballot box, and I think that says something about this middle place where we find ourselves at this moment. In 2003, 12 states still had sodomy laws on the books and only one state had civil unions. Four years ago, marriage was used to rile up a right-wing base, and we were branded as a bigger threat than terrorism. In 2008, most people know that we are not a threat. Proposition 8 did not result from a popular groundswell of opposition to our rights, but was the work of a small core of people who fought to get it on the ballot. The anti-LGBT message didn’t rally people to the polls, but unfortunately when people got to the polls, too many had no problem with hurting us. Faced with an economy in turmoil and two wars, most Californians didn’t choose the culture war. But faced with the question — brought to them by a small cadre of anti-LGBT hardliners — of whether our families should be treated differently from theirs, too many said yes.

But even before we do the hard work of deconstructing this campaign and readying for the future, it’s clear to me that our continuing mandate is to show our neighbors who we are.

Justice Lewis Powell was the swing vote in Bowers, the case that upheld Georgia’s sodomy law and that was reversed by Lawrence v. Texas five years ago. When Bowers was pending, Powell told one of his clerks, “I don’t believe I’ve ever met a homosexual.” Ironically, that clerk was gay, and had never come out to the Justice. A decade later, Powell admitted his vote to uphold Geor-

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gia’s sodomy law was a mistake.

Everything we’ve learned points to one simple fact: people who know us are more likely to support our equality.

In recent years, I’ve been delivering this positive message: Tell your story.

Share who you are. And in fact, as our families become more familiar, support for us increases. But make no mistake: I do not think we have to audition for equality. Rather, I believe that each and every one of us who has been hurt by this hateful ballot measure, and each and every one of us who is still fighting to be equal, has to confront the neighbors who hurt us. We have to say to the man with the ‘Yes on 8’ sign — you disrespected my humanity, and I am not giving you a pass. I am not giving you a pass for explaining that you tolerate me, while at the same time denying that my family has a right to exist. I do not give you permission to say you have me as a “gay friend” when you cast a vote against my family, and my rights.

Wherever you are, tell a neighbor what the California Supreme Court so wisely affirmed: that you are equal, you are human and that being denied equality harms you materially.

Although I, like our whole community, am shaken by Prop 8’s passage, I am not yet ready to believe that anyone who knows us as human beings and understands what is at stake would consciously vote to harm us.

This is not over. In California, our legal rights have been lost, but our human rights endure, and we will continue to fight for them.

Joe Solmonese is the president of the Human Rights Campaign.

QSaltLake Welcomes Letters from Our Readers Love a story written in this issue? Hate one? Did a columnist piss you off or tickle your funny bone? Want to say something to the world?

Send a letter to the editor — we love feedback!

Please keep your letter under 300 words and email it to letters@qsaltlake.com.

Your letter, if published, may possibly be edited for length, suitability or libel.

No one wants to go to court.

Snaps & Slaps SNAP: Attorney General Jerry Brown Our first cheer of the new year goes out to California’s attorney general for saying what a bunch of us have been arguing since Nov. 5: Proposition 8, the controversial measure re-banning same-sex marriage in the Bay State, should be overturned by the state supreme court. Why? Because it violates the state’s constitutional guarantees on individual liberties. “There are certain rights that are not to be subject to popular votes, otherwise they are not fundamental rights,” Brown told Silicon Valley’s Mercury News on Dec. 19. “If every fundamental liberty can be stripped away by a majority vote, then it’s not a fundamental liberty.” Typically, attorneys general are sworn to uphold laws, unless they determine that such laws go against their state’s constitution. Amusingly, Prop. 8’s supporters cried foul and screamed yet again about the “will of the people.” Which only proved Brown’s point: Prop. 8 is a bad law because it is first and foremost an unconstitutional law. So while the battle to overturn “Prop H8te” is far from over, Brown’s brief against the law is a very promising first strike.

SLAP: Chris Buttars It seems that Sen. Chris Buttars, R-West Jordan, may be psychologically incapable of behaving like anything but a tool. Last month he announced that he is drafting a resolution for the 2009 general legislative session asking retailers not to “exclude Christmas” when giving holiday greetings to customers.

Apparently the “War on Christmas” is such a problem in Utah, that Buttars felt moved to start work on this resolution, which, like all of Utah’s “message” legislation, is as legally unenforceable as it is a waste of paper. Yeah, keep chasing that rainbow, Chris.

SNAP: Light Up The Night Because anybody who braves five degree Park City weather for a marriage equality vigil deserves a damn medal for services above and beyond the call of duty. We hope you folks all remembered to wear mittens.

My Childhood Drawing and the Town Sissy

by Trevor Southey

I

was the town sissy.

I suppose there were possibly a couple of other candidates, but if there were they were way overshadowed by me.

Even though I instinctively clung to my mother’s skirts, which must have annoyed my poor father, the ultimate sportsman and gentleman newly returned from war, I never remember him expressing any sense of shame. I also do not recollect any overt bullying by other kids. Of course I wore a shield of sorts. I was also the kid who almost died of rheumatic fever, missing months of school while languishing in a hospital. Perhaps that confused the other kids.

Surely the drawing (attached), which I did when I was perhaps 7 or 8, would have been a clear declaration of my difference. It labels me sissy of the first order. And gradually I understood what made me very peculiar. I knew by some primal sense that it was not good. It would not do the tribe any good. It was disgusting. Little did I know how transparent it was. But in the polite society of Rhodesia, there may have been whisperings, but I remember no direct (overt) derision.

I was 18 and had recently arrived in England to attend art school when the first direct mirthful notification hit me. A bunch of students were all housed in a couple of boarding houses overlooking the English Channel. We were walking down the hill to school, boys in front, girls behind. Suddenly buoyant Nike sung out, “Southey, you walk like a queer.” It must have hit me hard even though it was probably good-hearted. Perhaps I flushed red, but I kept on walking and got on with life, knowing that concealment was not easy, perhaps impossible.

Spring ahead a few years. I had converted to the Mormonism and was drawn to Zion. There I determined my life’s course. I went to counseling at Brigham Young University within a week of arriving. I was steered to a confession to one of the 12 apostles who notified me clearly and to my mind callously, that not only would I be expelled from the university but would be deported should I succumb to my hateful inclination. I embarked on a serious and studious road to repentance and transformation, led by the counselor. Two things stand out in the advice I was given, one: Learn to walk and talk like a man and play baseball; and two: Marry. The latter was part of my life’s dream anyway so I proceeded earnestly to date and then break the hearts of a few fine women.

I moved my graduating year into an apartment with four other students.

Months later I was startled to find one of these friends in a homosexual group therapy session. There was yet another surprise. By the end of the year it gradually became apparent all five of us were thus “cursed.” Guess birds of a feather ... The other four adapted their lives to that world while I stubbornly went ahead searching for a wife. I found her during that same year and we were married the day after we both graduated. She was, and is, a remarkable woman. It remains my greatest

propositions that discriminate understand that I understand their primal revulsion. That same instinct has been the seed of the wrack, the burning at the stake, lynching, and at its worst the Holocaust, usually justified by selected scripture and tradition. But we humans have at times risen above such bigotry. Witness the presidential election in the United States. And we should have the intellect and comprehension to rise to the full acceptance of a peculiar group within our societies,

regret in life that she suffered so much because of me.

Now decades later, having lived through something of a liberation with all its extremes, I find with my 70th birthday little over a year away, that a subtle degrading polluting and poisonous assault on my phsyche remains.

Even many who profess to love me contribute, little knowing that the reluctantly proffered civil union damages me, awakening again the self loathing I have had to fight all my life. Assuming I had someone I wished to live out my last days with as a companion, I must restrain myself from offending “normal” folk. I must not sully the sanctity of the word and institution of marriage by requesting its romance, its sweet umbrella and mantle. There is a certain human hunger for such ritual and it has denied me. That denial tells me that I remain a corrupting thorn in the minds of a majority, unworthy of love in my “perverted” way, unqualified to raise children within those bonds.

That I have raised four children, fine honorable people who love me in spite of my “perversion” means little.

I would want those who voted yes on

and embrace them completely. Words do matter. They can be murderous.

There will no doubt be numerous suicides because of this one word of denial. Just 10 years ago a young man in Wyoming was beaten and left to die on a fence in bitter cold because of the insidious words of hate. Words can also be healing. This one word for those like me is huge in its capacity to heal.

And so my experience has evolved from anxiety as a child, to fear in early adulthood, to defiance and denial of my reality once Mormon, then to grief at the loss of family and dreams.

This was coupled with exhilaration in personal acceptance, then years of bemused contentedness but now to rage and anger. No more the wimp, I am a man determined to claim right to full citizenship as a human, different but totally legitimate, honest and vital in the lives of those I love.

And after all, fairies are people too! Q Trevor Southey’s artwork is currently on display at the Thomas Kearns McCarthey Gallery in Park City through Jan. 14.

J a nua r y 9, 20 0 9 | issue 119 | QSa lt L a k e | 13

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Ruby Ridge D.A.M.M. (Drag-queens Against Meddling Moralists)

by Ruby Ridge

H

New Year, darlings! I hope you all had a lovely and safe celebration and your loins are girded for the fiscal, political and social crap storm that will be calendar year 2009. After all, it was Paul McCartney who cheerfully sang, “I have to believe it’s getting better,” but it was John Lennon who really nailed my thoughts when he sang, “it can’t get much worse.”

I’m not ashamed to say loudly and cathartically that last year truly sucked. Between breaking my elbow, wrist and ankle in the span of 12 months, the implosion of the economy, the election of Jason Chaffetz and the NBC’s series Heroes going to hell, I for one am really ready for a fresh start.

Speaking of celebrations and New Year revelry, muffins, maybe now is a good time to talk a little about drinkappy

ing and driving. They say only Nixon could have gone to China, and so it is that I, Ruby Ridge, the “Matriarch of Moderation” if you will, can rightfully rag on Mothers Against Drunk Driving and their over the top neo-prohibitionist ways.

Rest assured, kittens, I deplore drunk driving and all of the senseless casualties, deaths and ills that it creates. But as someone who lives a virtuous, temperate life free from the evils of the demon drink, I am uniquely qualified to say that the folks at MADD have lost their minds and fallen off their prohibitionist bar stools. Cherubs, these anti-drinking zealots are simply going too far!

Take the private club membership fee, for example. Chances are this issue will come up in front of the legislature this year, as the governor wants to liberalize some of Utah’s Byz-

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antine liquor laws, and the legislature is just aching for an excuse to bitch slap him around a bit. Already MADD and the neoprohibitionists are frothing at the Department of Alcoholic Beverage Control hearings, saying that abolishing private club fees will increase the amount of drunk driving, that driving fatalities will increase exponentially, plagues of locusts and frogs will fall from the sky, and why, oh why Lord, doesn’t somebody think about the children?!?

Their shrill, manipulative arguments make no sense. They unfairly malign the majority of responsible drinkers and bar owners, and then actually work against public safety by encouraging unregulated and excessive drinking at home. They also compound the problem by turning the door staff of clubs and bars into receptionists, instead of safety enforcers who protect minors and the community from drunk drivers.

If bar owners did not have to commit costly resources to explain membership rules to visitors, then do the filling out, carding, screening, change-making and maintaining of those memberships, they would have more time to check IDs to stop underage drinking. Better, they’d also have more sets of eyes to ensure patrons don’t drive when impaired. That’s not just a good thing, it’s a great thing.

And the responsible bar owners I

know would be all for it.

But it seems that MADD and Utah’s perennial anti-alcohol activists like Dr. George Van Komen have decided that all drinking should be prohibited, and sadly, their inflated and emotive arguments are finding a receptive ear in teetotaling DABC Commissioner, Kathryn Balmforth. The problem for me is that MADD started out with a noble idea, but over time the organization has morphed from concerned family members deterring drunk driving to an all-out single issue political pressure group dedicated to a prohibition on alcohol. Pull up their Web site, pumpkins, and look at their national legislative agenda. You will be horrified at how intrusive and extreme it really is.

I wish the activists at MADD would concern themselves with distracted driving, which I guarantee is causing just as many accidents and fatalities as drunk driving. You know, the people driving while talking on cell phones, texting, eating, playing with kids in the back seat, that sort of thing. If that was their goal, I would be the first person in line to slap a MADD bumper sticker on my car and wig cases.

So I would ask you petals, please make a resolution to drink and drive safely this year, because I for one would miss our little chats.

Ciao, babies! Q

A Roadmap to LGBT Politics in the New Year

By Diane Silver

After a gutwrenching 2008, should we expect more of the same this year? Not necessarily, but we do need to pay close attention to the political landscape.

Here are three milestones to watch this year.

Depending on what happens at each, LGBT America either will be celebrating new victories or doubled over from freshly inflicted wounds 12 months from now.

Will Barack Obama keep his word?

Inviting Proposition 8 supporter Rick Warren to give the opening prayer at the inauguration was certainly a kick in the stomach to queer America. But far more important to our everyday lives is the question of whether Obama will fulfill his campaign promises.

Obama’s transition site, change. gov, made a great start by categorizing LGBT issues under the heading of “Civil Rights.” On the site, the Obama team lists an ambitious agenda. This includes expanding hate-crime laws, passing the Employment Non-Discrimination Act with gender identity included, providing civil unions to same-sex couples with “legal rights and privileges equal to those of married couples,” and expanding adoption rights.

Also on Obama’s to-do list is repealing the Defense of Marriage Act, which keeps legally married samesex couples from receiving federal benefits; and repealing the “Don’t ask, Don’t tell” ban on out lesbians and gays in the military.

Few politicos expect Obama to do all of that in his first 12 months, or even to begin working on each agenda item. In fact, the only promise Obama makes for his first year, according to the site, is the modest pledge to “develop and begin to implement a comprehensive national HIV/AIDS strategy that includes all federal agencies.”

With a near-depression looming and two wars at hand, the Obama administration won’t make LGBT rights a top priority. That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t expect progress. What should we watch?

Signs of Danger: Congressional liberals move on hate crimes, job discrimination and other legislation.

Social conservatives scream, legislation stalls, Obama and his adminis-

tration remain silent. An alternative scenario is that everyone is silent.

There are no bills, no hearings, no votes. The Obama administration says it wants to clear the way for ... um, more important issues.

Billboards of Hope: Obama not only continues to mention LGBT Americans positively, but his team works with Congress to push pro-gay legislation. Not a single angry statement emerges from out-Congressman Barney Frank’s office.

What will happen after the California Supreme Court rules on Proposition 8?

The proposition we all love to loathe is far from dead. Lawsuits are before the state Supreme Court. At issue is whether Prop 8 will be allowed to stand or be overturned, and whether 18,000 same-sex couples will remain married or be forcibly divorced.

Oral arguments are scheduled for March, and a ruling is expected later in spring. As important as that ruling will be, it’s what happens afterwards that will shape our future.

If Prop 8 is voided by the court, anti-gay forces are expected to try to recall the justices. A pro-gay ruling will also spark a backlash that could easily put a similar ban back onto the California ballot. If Prop 8 is upheld, pro-equality forces can mount their own campaign for marriage rights. In other words, no matter what the court does, the LGBT community will once again be fighting at the ballot box.

Signs of Danger: California’s proequality community is as disorganized and disconnected in April as it was in November.

Billboards of Hope: By April, old LGBT politicos have joined forces with new leaders to raise money and to create a newly energized and more politically savvy campaign.

Is this really Stonewall 2.0?

After Proposition 8 passed, thousands of angry protestors filled the streets.

Gay political pundits, myself included, dubbed this Stonewall 2.0 — the start of a new LGBT revolution.

But time moved on, and demonstrations began drawing smaller crowds.

The “Day Without a Gay” effort, urging LGBT folks to skip work and “call in gay” in December, fell flat.

This sputtering protest movement, however, isn’t the most serious sign that the Great Gay Awakening may not be so great after all. Demonstrations can feel wonderful, but ultimately a protest won’t do half as much to win rights as a voter registration drive.

Obama’s presidential campaign proved that a neighbor-to-neighbor, block-by-block organizing effort can make history. The real issue for LGBT America is whether we will take these kind of practical, political steps or be content to merely march down a street.

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Will newly energized folks flock to old organizations to bring new ideas and more money? Will they create their own groups to provide a different perspective? Either approach will make a difference.

Signs of Danger: Pro-equality Americans keep protesting, but organize nothing. The same folks who always attended political meetings in the past

continue to attend and to pine with loneliness. The newly energized stay away.

Billboards of Hope: You all make a fool out of me.

Diane Silver is a former newspaper reporter and magazine editor, whose freelance writing has appeared in Ms. magazine, Salon. com, and other national publications.

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Queer Gnosis Wikiqueers & Homotextuals

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by Troy Williams

he future happened yesterday

and the tower came tumbling down. Queer activism is in the process of a major reboot.

The antiquated operating systems are broken and a system-wide upgrade is underway. Yee-haw!

Many people are asking, “Where is the next Harvey Milk?” That question is so yester-gay. It misses the larger truth: We already have Harvey Milk. In the 21st Century there will be no gay neo-savior to rise up and light the way to liberation.

Something other is emerging. The old top-down model of political organization is over. R.I.P. As anti-gay measures and propositions continue to pass across the country, it has become obvious that the old organizations have failed. Why? They coveted the privilege of our oppressors. Not for the universal “all,” but rather for the select few only. They (and by extension we) fought to gain access to the failing institutions of the hetero-dysfunctional marriage club. But we were repeatedly blocked, unable to hack the code.

Messianic hopes can now be piled on the trash heap of patriarchy.

Activism has now gone viral. On Nov. 5, 2008, something new was

born. In the fire of our oppression we awakened. Our global electroqueer brain fired up. Suddenly the old rules changed. The national gay institutions that desired to model white heterosexual power suddenly were exposed for their obsolescence.

The grassroots net-generation logged on. And they where everywhere: wikiqueers, cyber-dykes, digi-fags, trannybloggers and homotextuals.

A spontaneous, global network of peers R now online and in the streets. The geeks have come to inherit the earth.

The first decade of the new millennium will end with a total transformation of everything we thought we knew about activist politics. Our first order of business: replace all anachronistic hierarchies with horizontal, leaderless organization. Wikiqueers have restored the Commons. Rallies are

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mobilized, information shared and emails exchanged. Viral vigils followed by meta-marches. National orgs now take cues from our local PACs. This is the pop-future of activism. From now on, we restructure everything from the bottom up.

Our consensual hallucination has been shattered. These old mavens of assimilation — these boring, washed-up standard bearers of the status quo may fear the wikiqueer.

They may even seek to silence these strange transgressive gender chimeras. They are occupied by their own self-importance as the world marches on without them.

Rewind 30 years.

Harvey Milk was a prophet before his time, a human with an expanded universal consciousness. A cultural frontrunner who understood that gay liberation would never be achieved on its own. It would by necessity only arrive arm in arm (hyper-linked and networked) with broader agents of social change: Peace activism, labor rights, racial justice. The old boorish gay leadership viewed Milk with suspicion.

They rejected his message in spite of his success. They deleted his life from our collective memory while they returned to the politics of assimilation. They hijacked our movement with their matrimonial myopia, oblivious that it only benefited the privileged few who happened to be coupled. They were cautious.

Conservative. Analogue. Always careful never to make waves. Old school organizing sans retro hip panache. We forgot our radical roots.

The queers of Stonewall would no doubt be denounced today for their unruly behavior. Histrionic lesbian legislators (scared to offend their masters) might yell at rascal rioters, “You have gone too far! You are too radical!” LOL. These assimilationists are content to be a docile market demographic programmed to consume the wares of a commodity culture. They want us to be nice fags w/ queer eyes for straight guys.

Trans kids need not apply. Give that queen an M-16.

F#*k that.

The role of the queer in society is to collapse boundaries and destabilize established binaries of

Wiki-queers don’t need leaders.

We need collaboration, creativity and community.

subjugation. What does that mean?

The rusty hegemonies are to be dislodged by the new politics of radical inclusion. We fight not just for a few select and privileged gays, but rather for all humankind. We have allowed these unelected leaders to erase the radicalism of our purpose.

But no longer. We R Bored by U. We are impatient with UR non-stop buffering and impossibly slow connection speeds. We are hacking the party and overwriting the operating system.

In the new millennium, technology will continue evolving. The global brain of the worldwide web morphed into Web 2.0. Digital citizens became creators of content.

Virtual mash-ups of unlimited creativity inspired MyWikiTubiabook.

A peer2peer hypercortex of possibility. This is the promise of the next decade. We have now witnessed the birth of Activism 2.0. Wiki-queers don’t need leaders. We need collaboration, creativity and community.

Imagine a world without hierarchies. Without gender rankings.

Where the top is as valued as the bottom (U R so hot BB!). Imagine new platforms of radical public expression. Political software that allows users to edit content. Imagine a bandwidth massive enough to include every global queer regardless of color, class or non-conforming presentation. These are the mega trends of the cyber-space savants.

We are encoding new realities into a multivalic virtual genderverse.

Revolution on demand.

BTW, Harvey Milk did not die in 1978. His consciousness was uploaded into the noosphere — the collective totality of all information, language and imagination that is wiring together the global mind. A critical mass is emerging. Smart mobs are coalescing. We are accessing the genius of all ages. Time is collapsing and compressing. The loneliness of the isolated individual will be submerged in the collective interdependence of the whole. Think techno-Zen with a transgender interface. Integral platforms will transcend while simultaneously including the foundational building blocks of this new society. Holonic realities alter every perception of the real.

We are all information technology.

Ones and zeroes ad infinitum. We all belong now. In this moment. Every fringe-freak has a place in the Queer World Order. Yes, even the old tired DOS bound suburban lesbi-gays will belong. They can join our party.

Someone has to bring the wine. :) Troy Williams blogs at queergnosis.com.

Of all the deadly sins, greed was her favorite.

Regina

by Marc Blitzstein Keith Lockhart, conductor ~ Michael Scarola, director

z

January 17 ~ 25 A little jazz. A little ragtime. A little murder. Based on “The Little Foxes� by Lillian Hellman, Keith Lockhart conducts this moving American opera. For tickets call 801-355-ARTS or visit utahopera.org.

OPERA SEASON SPONSOR

Shiebler Family Foundation Bill and Joanne Shiebler

J a nua r y 9, 20 0 9 | issue 119 | QSa lt L a k e | 17

Lambda Lore An “Unconventional Domestic Arrangement”

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by Ben Williams

unny how history can feel so

familiar. Replace the words “same-sex” with the word “miscegenation” in front of the word marriage and you have the same far right religious radicals’ battle to protect the sacred institution of matrimony, only from the 1960s instead of the 2000s.

Until a 1967 Supreme Court ruling, interracial marriage was illegal in half of the United States. The same religious nut jobs then as today appealed to the Bible as a justification to prohibit connubial rights between categories of people they did not like. They were wrong then, they are wrong now, and sadly it probably will take another Supreme Court decision to untie the religious tentacles of those who would strangle the secular rights of other Americans.

The ban on miscegenation — that is, interracial marriage (or more broadly, interbreeding between members of two different races) — was a major hurdle Americans had to get over on the quest to achieve social justice. In the colonial period anti-miscegenation laws primarily meant those laws forbidding

marriage between blacks and whites.

There seemed to be no such prohibition between whites and Native Americans, as in the case with John Rolf, who married Pocahontas in 1614. However, that would change during the 19th Century when anti-miscegenation laws were expanded to include the intermarriage of whites with Native Americans and Asians.

But let’s go back a few centuries. The first state to see anti-miscegenation laws as inherently wrong was the Quaker state of Pennsylvania. Even before it became a state, this progressive colony abolished its anti-miscegenation laws in 1790. It would take over 50 years for the next state to abolish its law against interracial marriage.

That state was Massachusetts, which dropped its anti-miscegenation law in 1843. This state would also have the honor of being the first to allow its residents to marriage regardless of sexual orientation, 161 years later.

One of the most famous 19th Century common-law marriages between a white man and a mixed-race woman

was between Kentucky Congressman Richard Johnson and his father’s former slave, Julia Chinn. Although state law prohibited Johnson from marrying Chinn, this “unconventional domestic arrangement” did not keep him from becoming vice president of the United States — although it probably did keep him from becoming president.

Such statutory laws prohibited many Southern men from marrying their loved ones. An ancestor of mine, Elijah Willis, left South Carolina for Ohio to free and marry his black common-law wife, Amy, and free the children of that union who would have remained property in South Carolina where such marriages were illegal.

In 1871, Missouri congressman Andrew King (a Democrat) proposed a constitutional amendment to make interracial marriage illegal nationwide. He feared that the 14th Amendment, which guaranteed equal civil rights to the emancipated slaves, would render laws against interracial marriage unconstitutional. While King’s proposal did not find support in the Radical Republican Congress, his fears were well-grounded, however; 70 years later California would abolish its anti-miscegenation laws citing the 14th Amendment.

Roughly 40 years later in 1913, another constitutional ban on interracial marriage was proposed by Georgia Democrat Seaborn Roddenberry. This constitutional amendment stated in part: “Intermarriage between negros or persons of color and Caucasians ... within the United States ... is forever prohibited.” This national hysterical fear of interracial marriage was a reaction to black heavyweight champion Jack Johnson’s marriages to two white women. The movie The Great White Hope is based on Johnson’s life.

The proposed amendment ultimately failed, but Wyoming enacted an antimiscegenation law in the same year.

Even the Commonwealth of Massachusetts enacted a measure that prevented couples who could not marry in their home state from marrying in Massachusetts. Some 70 years later Mitt Romney, then governor of Massachusetts and a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, would dust off this antiquated law to prohibit gays from other states coming to Massachusetts to marry.

In 1928 Coleman Blease, a senator from South Carolina, proposed a constitutional amendment that would require congress to punish interracial couples attempting to get married and the people officiating such marriages.

This amendment also went nowhere, however, and anti-miscegenation laws were left up to individual states.

So, where was Utah in the national debate over interracial marriage? Well, territorial governor Brigham Young had harsh opinions about miscegenation. In a speech recorded in the LDS Church’s Journal of Discourses, Young had this to say on the subject: “Shall I tell you the Law of God in regard to

the African race? If the white man who belongs to the chosen seed mixes his blood with the seed of Cain, the Penalty, under the Law of God is Death on the Spot. This will ALWAYS BE SO.” (Vol. 10 p. 110) Utah has mellowed out since its pioneer days. Still, Mormon Apostle Spencer Kimball said this in 1959: “We are unanimous, all of the Brethren, in feeling and recommending that Indians marry Indians, and Mexicans marry Mexicans; the Chinese marry Chinese and the Japanese marry Japanese; that the Caucasians marry the Caucasians, and the Arabs marry Arabs.” (The Teachings of Spencer W. Kimball, p.303) Utah’s disdain for interracial marriage was coded in state law until 1963.

Sadly, Utah would not have recognized the marriage of President Barack Obama’s parents when Obama was born in 1961 in Hawaii. Indeed, our state’s change of heart primarily came about because of legal challenges in neighboring states.

Now, what of California? In 1948, the state’s Supreme Court ruled that California’s anti-miscegenation statute violated the 14th Amendment of the Constitution and was therefore unconstitutional. This was the first time since Reconstruction that a state court had declared a miscegenation law unconstitutional.

But the nationwide overturning of anti-interracial marriage laws would not come about until a decade later.

In 1958, an interracial couple, Richard and Mildred Loving, married in Washington D.C. to evade Virginia’s anti-miscegenation law, called the “Racial Integrity Act.” After returning to Virginia, police arrested the Lovings in their bedroom for living together as an interracial couple. If this sounds familiar, there’s a good reason. Twentyfive years later Georgia police arrested Michael Hardwick, a gay man, in his bedroom for having sex with a man.

The Lovings’ arrest eventually went before the U.S. Supreme Court, which ruled that all bans on interracial marriage were unconstitutional. The miscegenation laws of the remaining 16 states thus became invalidated. This ruling left Apartheid South Africa the last nation with anti-miscegenation laws until they too were abolished in 1985.

Michael Hardwick was not as fortunate as the Lovings, though. In 1986, the Supreme Court ruled in a split decision that the nation’s privacy laws did not protect sodomy. Hardwick would thus have to wait another generation for justice until 2003, when the Supreme Court finally overturned all sodomy laws in Lawrence v. Texas.

So what is the connection, if any, between gay marriage and interracial marriage? Gay columnist Andrew Sullivan has pointed out that no state with a history of miscegenation laws has so far allowed same-sex couples to wed, enjoy civil union status, domestic partner status, or any other form of state-sanctioned legal protection.

That’s something to think about. Q

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Gay Geeks Oh M. Night, No!

by JoSelle Vanderhooft

Before we begin this issue’s column, I have an important announcement. It seems like the universe listened to my pleas to bring Repo! The Genetic Opera to a movie theater within driving distance of Utah. This awesome goth/rock/horror/black comedy musical/opera will show at the Tower Theatre until Jan. 13. On that night, director Darren Lynn Brousman and co-creator Terrance Zdunich (who plays GraveRobber) will be on hand to introduce a screening of the film and to answer questions after. Visit saltlakefilmsociety.org for details, and be there or ... um, be not considered geeky! eeky ones, remember last September when I told you about the awesomeness that is Avatar: The Last Airbender? And how part of this show’s awesomeness is the fact that its cast is all non-white (that is, mainly Asian and Inuit/Aztec)? If you don’t remember, or if you’re still too hung over from New Years to really be reading this column, maybe an excerpt will jumpstart your memory: [Avatar]’s got engaging world building, a unique magical system (especially for one based on such a burned-over

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concept as the four elements), taut drama, charming romance and adolescent characters you don’t want to punch in the face every five seconds — a feat even Harry Potter couldn’t pull off. Since I am nothing if not a progressive geek, throw in complex female characters and respectful treatment of Chinese and Inuit cultures by Avatar’s (at least, I’m presuming) very white creators, and you’ve got a show that is truly what I would call family-friendly. That is, it does a good job fighting racism and sexism and its light but just dark enough to be honest storyline can be enjoyed by children and adults — especially adults like me who enjoy bright colors and several explosions per episode.

As you can probably tell, I just adore this show, explosions or not. So when I heard that Indian-born director M. Night Shyamalan was adapting the series into a trilogy of live action movies, I and many other fans were excited. Sure, Shyamalan is responsible for Lady in the Water and The Happening (a horror movie less frightening than the average episode of Blue’s Clues), but his good movies like The Sixth Sense and Unbreakable weren’t

J a nua r y 9, 20 0 9 | issue 119 | QSa lt L a k e | 19

exactly accidental successes. Also, he’s an Asian-American director. Surely, I thought, this boded well for the possibility of an all or at least mostly-Asian cast, which I think is necessary to preserve the show’s integrity. And, you know, not to be blatantly racist.

I mean, a director of color would conceivably get the importance of casting a movie about people of color with actors who are people of color. Right?

Well, apparently not. In December, entertainment magazines and Web sites across the world announced casting for the movie’s four leads: Aang the Avatar (whose civilization is modeled upon that of Tibet) would be played by Noah Ringer, a karate star from Texas. Katara and Sokka (who come from a civilization modeled upon Inuit tribes) would be played by Nicola Peltz and Jackson Rathbone of Twilight fame, respectively.

And who is in talks to play Prince Zuko, who comes from the decidedly Japaneseinfluenced Fire Nation? Jesse McCartney. You may remember him from the boy band Dream Street or as the voice of Jojo in Horton Hears a Who!.

What’s the problem here? With the possible exception of Ringer, all of these actors are white.

Now, I don’t know if these casting choices are Shyamalan’s fault or his producers’, but I do know that they are racist choices — although perhaps unintentionally so. The problem is, this thing happens in Hollywood all the time.

Whether it’s the movie 21 (which was based on the true story of Asian MIT students who ‘took’ Las Vegas casinos

for millions of dollars) the disastrous Wachowski Brothers’ movie-fication of the anime Speed Racer (in which all characters were originally Japanese), or a decidedly non-Native American actor playing Jacob Black in Twilight, Hollywood has long cast white people to play people of color, or simply re-written POC roles as white. The implications of this ‘white-washing’ are pretty clear to me: namely, that white people make better people of color than actual people of color, or that people of color in lead roles can’t “sell” a movie. Or, you know, that we live in a post-racist world where we can truly all be color blind. I mean, I don’t need to explain why all of these things are asinine and incredibly offensive, do I? And as for the argument that roles should be cast based on talent, not race?

Puh-lease! They couldn’t find any talented Asian or Native American actors in all of Hollywood? As a white person, I feel incredibly insulted by these assumptions; I can only imagine how insulted people of color, and Asian Avatar fans in particular, must feel.

Unless Shyamalan and/or his producers have a major change of mind, I’m not going to see the live action film (and believe me, I’m not holding my breath).

Instead, I’m just going to urge all of you to spend those Amazon.com gift cards you got last December on DVDs of the cartoon. It’s exciting, funny, actionpacked and definitely a great example of how diversity and multiculturalism can be done right. Q

QUEER GUIDE TO SUNDANCE • SLAMDANCE

QUEER LOUNGE • PARK CITY

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To help you prepare your choice of films to see at this year’s Sundance and Slamdance film festivals, we have provided a list of gay-themed movies (titles in pink), films featuring out cast members and a few films that arts editor Tony Hobday found interesting enough to recommend.

Film Guide

SUNDANCE FILM FESTIVAL Adventureland / USA World Premiere

In 1987, a recent college graduate takes a nowhere job at his local amusement park and discovers the job is perfect preparation for the real world.

Cast: Kristen Stewart, Ryan Reynolds, Bill Hader.

MON. JAN 19 6:15PM - Eccles Theatre TUE. JAN 20 9:15AM - Eccles Theatre WED. JAN 21 NOON - Screening Rm,

Sundance

THU. JAN 22 6:30PM - Rose Wagner, SLC

Dare / USA

US Narrative Feature

Dare follows three very-different teenagers through the last semester of high school. There are Alexa (Emmy Rossum), the overachieving good girl who longs to break out of her shell; Ben (Ashley Springer), the melancholy outsider confused about his sexuality; and Johnny (Zach Gilford), the rich kid who has everything, including good looks, but hides behind his bad-boy persona. This unlikely trio fall into each other’s lives and each other’s arms, making a last-ditch effort to shake things up before they actually have to start living as adults.

Director Adam Salky and writer David Brind takes us into some uncharted territory with fresh eyes and matter-of-fact authority. Sweet and sexy don’t always go together, but they work beautifully in this instance because the sexuality

of the film is cleverly woven into the fabric of the story. You can ask why the kids are in such a hurry to experience adult feelings, especially when their parents, comically enough, are afraid to get in the way. All is answered in the nuanced performances of this exceptional cast. They capture perfectly a generation with nothing to rebel against except their self-imposed inhibitions. By being keenly perceptive, director Salky stacks up countless priceless moments in crafting teen romance with a decidedly modern spin. In Dare, the kids do what they need to do to become the adults they should.

Cast: Emmy Rossum, Zach Gilford, Ashley Springer, Ana Gasteyer, Alan Cumming, Sandra Bernhard

MON. Jan 19 5:15PM – Racquet Club Tue. Jan 20 2:15PM – Racquet Club Thu. Jan 22 11:30PM – Prospector Square FRI. Jan 23 12:15PM – Eccles Theatre SAT. Jan 24 12:30PM – Rose Wagner, SLC

Død Snø (Dead Snow) / Norway North American Premiere

A group of teenagers had all they needed for a successful ski vacation; cabin, skis, snowmobile, toboggan, copious amounts of beer and a fertile mix of the sexes.

Certainly, none of them anticipated not returning home alive! However, the Nazi-zombie battalion haunting the mountains had other plans.

Cast: Vegard Hoel, Stig Frode Henriksen, Charlotte Frogner, Jenny Skavlan, Jeppe Beck Laursen.

SAT. Jan 17 11:59PM – Egyptian Theatre WED. Jan 21 9:30PM – Redstone Cinemas FRI. Jan 23 11:59PM – Egyptian Theatre SAT. Jan 24 10:30PM – Broadway Ctr IV, SLC

Earth Days / USA

Closing Night Documentary Film WORLD PREMIERE

The history of our environmental undoing through the eyes of nine Americans whose work and actions launched the modern environmental movement.

FRI. Jan 23 9:30PM – Eccles Theatre SAT. Jan 24 8:30AM – Library Ctr Theatre SAT. Jan 24 6:30PM – Rose Wagner, SLC SUN. Jan 25 10:00AM – Screening Rm, Sundance

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develops a desperate appetite for human blood, Madeline is faced with a mother’s ultimate decision.

Cast: Jordan Ladd, Samantha Ferris, Gabrielle Rose, Malcom Stewart, Stephen Park, Serge Houde.

Everything Strange and New / USA Spectrum

Wayne has a job, a wife, two kids, and a house. He’s living the American Dream. There’s a fine line, however, between a dream and nightmare, and Wayne finds himself at odds with the life he has and preoccupied by the life he thinks he wants. He floats passively in a swirling sea inhabited by his emotionally unpredictable wife, his out-of-control young children, and his embattled friends, who have demons of their own. As things change for others, Wayne’s life takes emotional turns, which are sometimes subtle and sometimes violent but never enough to shake him off the track he doesn’t remember choosing. Writer/director Frazer Bradshaw returns to Sundance (his short, Every Day Here, played at the 2000 Festival) with an exquisitely rendered, but challengingly bleak, examination of daily life. He focuses the story in unique ways that draw attention more intently to the emotional and psychological interplay of ideas, rather than following a narrative arc. Bradshaw, an established cinematographer, frames the world in beautifully composed shots that emphasize Wayne’s trapped existence. To underline the moral anomie of the disturbingly familiar universe, he utilizes a jarring, dissonant score at times and moments of silence in others.

Everything Strange and New is the kind of transcendent filmmaking that develops a cinematic language all its own, and in doing so opens viewers up to themselves.

Cast: Jerry McDaniel, Beth Lisick, Rigo Chacon Jr., Luis Saguar.

MON. Jan 19 11:30AM – Library Center WED. Jan 21 11:30PM – Library Center THU. Jan 22 6:00PM – Egyptian Theatre SAT. Jan 24 3:45PM – Broadway Ctr IV, SLC

Grace / USA World Premiere

After losing her unborn child, Madeline Matheson insists on carrying the baby to term. Following the delivery, the child miraculously returns to life, but when the baby

FRI. Jan 16 11:59PM – Egyptian Theatre SAT. Jan 17 6:30PM – Redstone Cinemas THU. Jan 22 noon – Egyptian Theatre FRI. Jan 23 7:30PM – Broadway Ctr IV, SLC

Hump Day / USA

US Narrative Feature Films

It’s been a decade since Ben and Andrew were the bad boys of their college campus. Ben has settled down and found a job, wife, and home. Andrew took the alternate route as a vagabond artist, skipping the globe from Chiapas to Cambodia. When Andrew shows up, unannounced, on Ben’s doorstep, they easily fall back into their old dynamic of heterosexual one-upmanship. After a night of perfunctory carousing, the two find themselves locked in a mutual dare: to enter an amateur porn contest. But what kind of boundary-breaking porn can two dudes make? After the booze and “big talk” run out, only one idea remains—they will have sex together…on camera. It’s not gay; it’s beyond gay. It’s not porn; it’s an art project. But how will it work?

And more importantly, who will tell Anna, Ben’s wife?Judging by writer and director Lynn Shelton, it takes a talented woman to unearth the biggest ironies in the male ego.

Humpday is a buddy movie gone wild. Shelton expertly mines this clever construct for every possible comedic and irreverent moment.

The three lead actors deliver fine-tuned performances amidst postmodern patter and tight, crisp storytelling. Shelton’s command of her craft shines brightest when our two gentlemen finally get down to the task at hand: creating a classic “wriggle in your seat” moment of truth.

Cast: Mark Duplass, Joshua Leonard, Alycia Delmore, Lynn Shelton, Trina Willard FRI. Jan 16 12:15pm – Eccles Theatre SAT. Jan 17 8:30AM – Racquet Club

S A o n B h s d c t d s b a I Love You Philip Morris / USA h World Premiere q With alacrity and style, Glenn g Ficarra and John Requa, the codi- m rectors of I Love You Phillip Morris, a have fashioned an improbable, a but true, tale of a spectacularly n charismatic and resourceful con- i man’s journey from small-town cop J to flamboyant white-collar criminal. H Concocted by the absurdist sen- a sibilities and warped minds that o w were behind the creation of Bad H Santa and centered around an eca centrically wonderful performance s

by Jim Carrey, the film relates a F story that is truly stranger than a fiction and showcases a love story I that will not be denied. When a lo- i cal Texas policeman, Steve Russell b (Carrey), turns to cons and fraud to i allow him to change his lifestyle (in i more ways than one), his subse- a quent stay in the state penitentiary s results in his meeting the love of C his life, a sensitive fellow inmate B R named Phillip Morris, perfectly T portrayed by Ewan McGregor. What F S ensues can only be described as a relentless quest as Russell attempts escape after escape and executes con after con, all in the name of love. This is the world of the preposterous: it plays like a farce but is vastly entertaining because it turns all that we take for granted about life on its head. As a primer on the irresistible power of a man who is either insane or in love (is there a difference?), I Love You Phillip Morris surely serves to remind us of the resilience of the L human spirit.

S Cast: Jim Carrey, Ewan McGregor, S Leslie Mann, Rodrigo Santoro. o SUN. Jan 18 9:30PM – Eccles Theatre b MON. Jan 19 9:15AM – Eccles Theatre s TUE. Jan 20 9:00PM – Tower Theatre, SLC SAT. Jan 24 6:00PM – Screening RM, Sundance t SAT. Jan 17 9:00pm – Tower Theatre, SLC MON. Jan 19 3:00pm – Screening rm, Sundance WED. Jan 21 2:15pm – Racquet Club FRI. Jan 23 5:15pm – Racquet Club

The Informers / USA North American Premiere

Sex, drugs, and new wave...Los Angeles in the early 1980s: a time of excess and decadence, and nobody captures it better than Bret Easton Ellis as he coadapts his own acclaimed novel for the screen. Its multistrand narrative deftly balances a vast array of characters, who represent both the top of the heap (a Hollywood dream merchant, a dissolute rock star, an aging newscaster) and the bottom (a voyeuristic doorman and an amoral ex-con). Connecting his intertwining strands are the quintessential Ellis protagonists—a group of beautiful, blonde young men and women who sleep all day and party all night, doing drugs— and one another—with abandon, never realizing that they are dancing on the edge of an abyss.Gregor Jordan returns to Sundance (Two Hands and Buffalo Soldiers played at previous Festivals) with a glamorous and gritty exposé of a culture where too much was never enough.

He presents both the seductive and repellent sides of a time when safe sex meant being on the pill.

Featuring a truly all-star cast who are at the top of their game, The Informers is a scathing descent into the morally bankrupt core beneath L.A.’s superficial beauty. It is both titillating and horrifying as it captures an era on the verge of an implosion whose effects we are still feeling today.

Cast: Billy Bob Thornton, Kim Basinger, Winona Ryder, Mickey Rourke.

THU. Jan 22 9:30PM – Eccles Theatre FRI. Jan 23 8:30AM – Library Ctr Theatre SAT. Jan 24 11:59PM – Tower Theatre, SLC

La Mission / USA Spectrum

Set in the colorful, seedy streets of the San Francisco district that bears its name, La MISSION is a story of redemption imbued with the curative power of Aztec tradi-

tion. Feared, yet respected, as the baddest Chicano on the block, Che (Benjamin Bratt), a reformed inmate and recovering alcoholic, resorts to violence and intimidation to get what he wants. A bus driver by day, Che lives for his beloved son, Jesse, his lifelong friends, and his passion for lowrider cars. Che and the “Mission Boyz” salvage junked cars, transforming them into classics.Che’s macho world is crushed when he discovers that Jesse’s been living a secret life. In a violent rage, Che pummels Jesse and throws him out of the house.

Lena, an attractive neighbor and a force to be reckoned with, is a woman with a few secrets of her own. Mutual attraction percolates as Lena challenges Che to reconcile the life he thought he had.Sundance veteran Peter Bratt (Follow Me Home) returns with a powerful second feature. Propelled by commanding performances from Jeremy Ray Valdez as Jesse and Erika Alexander as Lena—and featuring an exceptional turn by Benjamin Bratt—La MISSION is a haunting story of healing and transformation: the healing of a broken man, of a father’s relationship with his son, and of a neighborhood struggling to break the chains of violence.

Cast: Benjamin Bratt, Erika Alexander, Jeremy Ray Valdez, Talisa Soto Bratt, Jesse Borrego.

MON. JAN 19, 8:30PM – Prospector Square WED. JAN 21 2:30PM – Library Ctr Theatre FRI. JAN 23 noon – Egyptian Theatre SAT. JAN 24 9:45PM – Broadway Ctr IV, SLC

Louise-Michel / FRANCE

International Narrative Feature Films

Though times are tough, the women workers of a provincial toy factory are given new smocks to assure them of their company’s stability. But they show up the next day to find the factory empty, its machinery and management nowhere to be seen. Now “redundant,” they decide to pool their paltry compensation money toward a common goal, suggested by Louise: hire a hit man to kill the company’s owner. Enter Michel, a paranoid security manager at a trailer park, who offers no credentials but has a formidable gun collection. Partners in crime, Louise and Michel work their way up the corporate food chain behind the factory closure. Aptly dedicated to nineteenth-century French anarchist Louise Michel, this quixotic revenge comedy from Gustave

de Kervern and Benoît Delépine, makers of the wildly-surreal Avida, tosses decorum aside as it joyfully sifts through the underlying perversion of life. Propelled by rebellious humor, cartoonlike inventiveness, and an indie rock soundtrack, it’s also brutally dark. Michel, a killer who can’t even shoot a dog, much less a person, resorts to using terminally ill patients to do his dirty work. Downtrodden, mildly retarded Louise traps live animals for food and—unable to afford booze— buys lighter fluid. They may set out for revenge against capitalism, but their real oppressor is nature itself, which has cruelly twisted them.

SAT. Jan 17 9:30PM – Peery’s Egyptian, Ogden SUN. Jan 18 Noon – Egyptian Theatre MON. Jan 19 9:00PM – Tower Theatre, SLC WED. Jan 21 9:00PM – Egyptian Theatre FRI. Jan 23 Midnight – Holiday Village IV

Cast: Alec Baldwin, Kieran Culkin, Timothy Hutton, Cynthia Nixon, Emma Roberts.

FRI. JAN 16 9:00PM - Screening Rm, Sundance SAT. JAN 17 11:15AM - Racquet Club SUN. JAN 18 1:30PM - Broadway Ctr IV, SLC TUE. JAN 20 5:30PM - Library Ctr Theatre SAT. JAN 24 11:30PM - Prospector Square

Manure / USA World Premiere

A comic tale centered on manure salesmen in the early 1960s.

Cast: Téa Leoni, Billy Bob Thornton, Kyle MacLachlan.

TUE. JAN 20 9:30PM - Eccles Theatre WED. JAN 21 8:30AM - Library Ctr Theatre THU. JAN 22 9:00PM - Screening Rm, Sundance SAT. JAN 24 9:00PM - Broadway Ctr IV, SLC

Mary and Max / AUS Opening Night Animated Film

The tale of two unlikely pen pals: Mary, a lonely 8-year-old girl living in the suburbs of Melbourne, and Max, a 44-year old severely obese man living in New York.

Cast (voices): Philip Seymour Hoffman, Toni Collette, Barry Humphries.

THU. JAN 15 6:00PM - Eccles Theatre THU. JAN 15 9:30PM - Eccles Theatre FRI. JAN 16 9:15AM - Eccles Theatre FRI. JAN 16 6:30PM - PERRY’S EGYPTIAN, OGDEN SAT. JAN 17 6:30PM - Rose Wagner, SLC SAT. JAN 24 6:15PM - Eccles Theatre

The Messenger / USA World Premiere

Lymelife / USA Spectrum

Scott Bartlett (Rory Culkin) is a typical 15-year-old boy growing up in late-1970s Long Island. His suburban existence is primarily marked by a nerdy interest in Star Wars, fending off bullies at high school, his longtime crush on neighbor/best friend Adrianna Bragg (Emma Roberts), and navigating the dysfunctional terrain of his parents’ rocky marriage—all against the paranoid backdrop of a Lyme disease outbreak, which has freaked out Scott’s high-strung mother, Brenda (Jill Hennessy), and has already claimed Adrianna’s father, Charlie (Timothy Hutton), as a victim. With Charlie out of work due to his illness, Adrianna’s mother, Melissa (Cynthia Nixon), takes a job working for Scott’s father, Mickey (Alec Baldwin), a successful real-estate developer, and soon embarks on a messy affair. When eldest son Jimmy (Kieran Culkin) returns from army training and confronts his father about Mickey’s less-than-discreet adultery, both families are forever changed by the devastating consequences.

Drawing from their own childhoods, director Derick Martini and his brother and cowriter, Steven Martini, bring a palpable sense of place and authenticity to Lymelife.

Their alternately funny and emotionally devastating script, brought to life by a talented roster of actors, poignantly reinvents both the suburban drama and the comingof-age story at the same time.

Two soldiers from different generations form a unique bond as they cope with their assignment with the Army Casualty Notification department.

Cast: Ben Foster, Woody Harrelson, Samantha Morton, Jena Malone, Eamonn Walker.

MON. JAN 19 9:30PM - Eccles Theatre TUE. JAN 20 8:30AM - Library Ctr Theatre WED. JAN 21 6:30PM - Rose Wagner, SLC SAT. JAN 24 3:00PM - PERRY’S EGYPTIAN, OGDEN

Once More with Feeling / USA Spectrum

A comedy about a psychiatrist who undergoes a midlife crisis and pursues his long-lost ambition of becoming a singer through karaoke. Cast: Drea de Matteo, Linda Fiorentino, Chazz Palminteri, Susan Miser, Lauren Bittner.

from his past. The sun and sand do their part, helping separate him from the struggles of his everyday life and serving as a surreal backdrop for a peculiar menagerie of characters to enter his life. Writer/ director Stefano Tummolini tells a simple, yet beautiful, story that unfolds in a single day. He has assembled a perfect cast, playing characters drawn from every section of modern Italian society—old and young, gay and straight, rich and poor. On the beach, they find the perfect emotional equalizer for them to express themselves.

Antonio Merone, as the complicated Salvatore, is excellent in his role. As the sun lowers on the horizon, you realize Tummolini has accomplished something quite special: he has created a study of an ordinary day where an extraordinary thing happens—people are forced to slow down and become aware of the transformative pleasure of human contact.

Cast: Antonio Merone, Lucia Mascino, Francesco Grifoni, Chiara Francini, Tiziana Avarista.

FRI. Jan 16 6:45PM – Broadway Ctr V, SLC SUN. Jan 18 9:00PM – Egyptian Theatre WED. Jan 21 9:00AM – Egyptian Theatre FRI. Jan 23 2:30PM – Holiday Village III

Passing Strange / USA Spectrum

A musical documentary about the international exploits of a young man from Los Angeles who leaves home to find himself and ‘the real’.

A theatrical stage production of the original Tony-Award winning book

by Stew.

Cast: De’Adre Aziza, Daniel Breaker, Eisa Davis, Colman Domingo, Stew.

FRI. JAN 16 2:30PM - Library Ctr Theatre SAT. JAN 17 NOON - Screening Rm, Sundance SUN. JAN 18 3:00PM - Broadway Ctr IV, SLC TUE. JAN 20 11:59PM - HOLIDAY VILLAGE IV SAT. JAN 24 5:15PM - Library Ctr Theatre

MON. JAN 19 2:30PM - Prospector Square TUE. JAN 20 8:30PM - HOLIDAY VILLAGE III FRI. JAN 23 8:30AM - Prospector Square SAT. JAN 24 7:30PM - Broadway Ctr IV, SLC

Push / USA Spectrum

One Day in a Life / USA Spectrum

A man, Salvatore, crosses a sand dune heading to the beach. The next instant the beauty of the sea and sky is revealed to him, as if a forecast of the possibilities that lie ahead. Salvatore cuts a striking figure in his bathing suit and becomes an instant lightning rod for others’ curiosity. He exudes a bold presence, although his aloof exterior barely masks a lingering hurt

With sheer audacity and utter authenticity, director Lee Daniels tackles Push: Based on the Novel by Sapphire and creates an unforgettable film that sets a new standard for cinema of its kind. Precious Jones (Gabourey Sidibe) is a high-school girl with nothing working in her favor.

She is pregnant with her father’s child—for the second time. She can’t read or write, and her schoolmates tease her for being fat. Her home life is a horror, ruled by a mother (Mo’Nique) who keeps her imprisoned both emotionally and

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physically. Precious’s instincts tell her one thing: if she’s ever going to break from the chains of ignorance, she will have to dig deeply into her own resources.Don’t be misled— Push is not a film wallowing in the stillness of depression; instead, it vibrates with the kind of energy derived only from anger and hope.

The entire cast are amazing; they carry out a firestorm of raw emotion. Daniels has drawn from them inimitable performances that will rivet you to your seat and leave you too shocked to breathe. If you passed Precious on the street, you probably wouldn’t notice her.

But when her story is revealed, as Daniels does in this courageous film, you are left with an indelible image of a young woman who—with creativity, humor, and ferocity—finds the strength to turn her life around.

Cast: Gabourey Sidibe, Paula Patton, Mo’Nique, Mariah Carey, Sherri Shepherd, Lenny Kravitz FRI. Jan 16 8:00PM – Racquet Club SAT. Jan 17 noon – Broadway Ctr VI, SLC TUE. Jan 20 3:15PM – Eccles Theatre WED. Jan 21 11:30PM – Prospector Square FRI. Jan 23 2:15PM – Racquet Club

both the Right and the Left have lashed out in fear. In the stories of a left-wing professor fired for provocative remarks about 9/11, an Arab American principal made to resign after discussing the word “”intifada,”” and Christian schoolkids suspended for wearing Bible-quoting T-shirts, there’s an ironic pattern. When threatened by an outside enemy, perceived or real, we often demonize each other, undermining the very freedom we seek to protect. We think of First Amendment rights as inviolable; in fact, they’re profoundly vulnerable. Mixing vibrant pacing with an elegant journalistic style, Garbus orchestrates this urgent matter like a rallying cry for action. As her father, legendary attorney Martin Garbus, wisely warns, if we don’t fight for our freedoms every day, we will lose them.

MON. Jan 19 9:00PM – Temple Theatre TUE. Jan 20 2:30PM – Holiday Village III THU. Jan 22 6:45PM – Broadway Ctr V, SLC FRI. Jan 23 8:30AM – Holiday Village III SAT. Jan 24 noon – Temple Theatre

Rudo and Cursi (Rudo y Cursi) / MEX U.S. Premiere

Two siblings rival each other inside the world of professional soccer.

Cast: Diego Luna, Gael García Bernal, Guillermo Francella.

FRI. JAN 16 9:30PM - Eccles Theatre SAT. JAN 17 8:30AM - Library Ctr Theatre SUN. JAN 18 3:30PM - PPERRY’S EGYPTIAN, OGDEN FRI. JAN 23 6:30PM - Rose Wagner, SLC

Shouting Fire / MEX U.S. Premiere

During the 1950s, McCarthy’s red scare closed down avenues of dissent for a decade. Americans were pitted against one another. Political opinions became ammunition.

Since 9/11, the First Amendment has again been under attack. Liz Garbus’s Shouting Fire, a riveting exploration of the current state of free speech in America, is crucially relevant.Interweaving historical cases—The New York Times’s fight to publish the Pentagon Papers and the Nazis’ insistence on marching in Skokie, among them—with contemporary free-speech infringements, the film documents the way

Shrink / USA World Premiere

What happens when the people we count on to hold us together… are barely holding it together themselves? Jonas Pate’s Shrink is a striking, fast-paced exposé of the “other” Hollywood, featuring folks living outside their comfort zone and the people who put them there.Henry Carter (Kevin Spacey) is a psychiatrist with an A-list clientele, including a once-famous actress (Saffron Burrows), an insecure young writer (Mark Webber), and a comically obsessivecompulsive superagent (Dallas Roberts). Henry is not in a good place, however. He has been asked to take his first pro bono case, a troubled teenage girl from a neighborhood far from the Hollywood hills. Considering his present state of mind, is he ready for the real-life troubles of a young woman who loves the world of movies he has become so jaded by? At its core, Shrink is a study of control and our endless need for it, even when it grows increasingly impossible to obtain. Writer Thomas Moffett uses

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classic archetypes in this modern Hollywood tale, but never pushes them over the edge of credibility.

Performed by a well-matched cast at the top of their form, the result is both satisfying and exhilarating.

Watching Shrink makes us feel like voyeurs looking through a window into the lives of people who look great, feel worse, and end up behaving badly.

Cast:Kevin Spacey, Keke Palmer, Mark Webber, Dallas Roberts, Saffron Burrows.

TO SUNDANCE • SLAMDANCE QUEER LOUNGE • PARK CITY Spring Breakdown / USA

TUE. Jan 20 8:30AM – Holiday Village III THU. Jan 22 11:30AM – Library Ctr Theatre

Three thirtysomething friends attempt to break the monotony of their uninspired lives by vacationing at a popular spring break getaway for college students.

Cast: Rachel Dratch, Amy Poehler, Parker Posey, Will Arnett, Rachel Hamilton.

White Lightnin’ / UK

World Premiere

FRI. Jan 16 11:59PM – Library Ctr Theatre SAT. Jan 17 11:59PM – Tower Theatre, SLC SUN. Jan 18 9:30PM – Redstone Cinemas THU. Jan 22 3:00PM – Egyptian Theatre SAT. Jan 24 3:45PM – Holiday Village I

World Premiere

Los Angeles is often the customary site for mythmaking in the American cultural iconography.

It is a place, for instance, where the legend of the sexual exploits of the male gigolo seems perfectly at home in the decadent universe of Hollywood dreams and nightmares. Surely inspired by the classic tradition of American Gigolo and Shampoo, Spread is such a perfectly tuned, contemporary depiction of the trials and tribulations of sleeping your way to wealth and success that, guilty pleasure or not, it’s irresistible. Especially so since it’s driven by the iconic persona of Ashton Kutcher, who plays Nikki and breathes the charged sexuality, fashion and hipness, and sense of entitlement of the sexual grifter as if he were born to it. Stylishly directed by David MacKenzie (Hallam Foe, Young Adam), Spread is a moral tale in a very-modern sense with its characters of a young man and his middle-aged, well-to-do client (played by Anne Heche), his various associates and conquests, and a waitress whom he begins to really care about (unbeknownst to him, she is playing the same game). The world of money, sex, and privilege is an ephemeral one, and the fall can be as sudden as the ascent. Spread is a finely crafted vision of ambition, indulgence, vanity, and self-realization that epitomizes the lifestyle of a fabled Mecca.

Cast: Ashton Kutcher, Anne Heche.

SAT. Jan 17 9:15PM – Eccles Theatre SUN. Jan 18 9:15AM – Eccles Theatre THU. Jan 22 9:00PM – Tower Theatre, SLC

MON. JAN 19 11:59PM - Egyptian Theatre WED. JAN 21 5:30PM - HOLIDAY VILLAGE III FRI. JAN 23 9:30PM - Redstone Cinemas SAT. JAN 24 11:59PM - Broadway Ctr IV, SLC Park City at Midnight

World’s Greatest Dad / USA A comedy about a high school poetry teacher who learns that the things you want most may not be the things that make you happy.

Cast: Robin Williams, Daryl Sabara, Alexie Gilmore, Tom Kenny, Geoffrey Pierson.

Unmade Beds / USA

World Premiere

The outrageous cult story of Jesco White, the dancing outlaw.

Cast: Ed Hogg, Carrie Fisher, Muse Watson, Wallace Merck, Clay Steakley.

Spectrum

WED. Jan 21 6:15PM – Eccles Theatre THU. Jan 22 9:15AM – Eccles Theatre FRI. Jan 23 9:00PM – Screening Rm, Sundance SAT. Jan 24 9:00PM – Tower Theatre, SLC

Spread / USA

World Premiere

With his startlingly visceral and original second feature, Unmade Beds, Alexis Dos Santos manifests an exuberant London where unbridled longing and zeal plunge nubile expats into lusty adventures and momentous encounters. When wide-eyed Spaniard Axl comes to London on a quest for the father who abandoned him, he lands in the middle of a creative hotbed— an underground polyglot squat filled with colorful free spirits.

Among them is Vera, a beautiful Belgian girl recently dumped by her boyfriend, who seeks to restore her faith in romantic destiny after meeting a charismatic stranger.

As Axl and Vera separately pursue these bittersweet and elusive connections, they circle each other’s orbits—their fates almost inevitably intertwined.Alongside this lush story of youthful awakening, Dos Santos conjures a rhythmic streamof-consciousness mood collage.

Axl and Vera’s world vibrates with visual and sonic energy. The palate of yellows, reds, and greens emits benevolent warmth as if to soften the blow of their tender aches. Surprising sound scapes and an effusive score aptly express the characters’ mercurial interior states. Meanwhile slapstick moments and musical performances by fresh unknowns puncture the melancholy, buoying the film into irreverent whimsy. They may be slightly crumpled works in progress—like the unmade beds where they slumber—but Axl, Vera, and their friends are as vital as a crisp new day.

Cast: Deborah Francois, Fernando Tielve FRI. Jan 16 6:00PM – Egyptian Theatre SAT. Jan 17 12:45PM – Broadway Ctr V, SLC

SUN. JAN 18 5:30PM - Library Ctr Theatre TUE. JAN 20 8:30AM - Prospector Square TUE. JAN 20 6:00PM - TOWER THEATRE, SLC SAT. JAN 24 11:30AM - Racquet Club

SUNDANCE SHORTS

575 Castro St. Documentary

An experimental short film shot on the empty set of Gus Van Sant’s Milk, featuring the original archival audio recorded by Harvey Milk on November 18th, 1978 – to be played in the event of his assassination.

MON. Jan 19 9:00PM – Temple Theatre TUE. Jan 20 2:30PM – Holiday Village III THU. Jan 22 6:45PM – Broadway Ctr V, SLC FRI. Jan 23 8:30AM – Holiday Village III SAT. Jan 24 midnight – Temple Theatre

A Mate / Finland An absurdist comedy about a homophobic man who finds the thought of sex between two men so unimaginable that he asks a friend to join him in the bathroom and figure out what it’s like firsthand.

Unfortunately his wife comes home a bit early.

FRI. Jan 16 11:30PM – Prospector Square SAT. Jan 17 11:30AM – Library Ctr Theatre SUN. Jan 18 9:00PM – Broadway Ctr VI, SLC THU. Jan 22 11:59PM – Holiday Village IV SAT. Jan 24 8:30PM – Prospector Square

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Sister Wife

Abbie Cancelled

DoriAnn, a Mormon Fundamentalist, shares a husband with her younger biological sister. During a private bathing ritual, DoriAnn explores the surprisingly universal challenges of her marriage.

Documentary

Two couples who have never met find themselves engaged in an awkward dinner after their mutual friends cancel at the last second.

Acting for the Camera An acting class. Today’s scene: the orgasm from ‘When Harry Met Sally.’

FRI. Jan 16 8:30AM – Holiday Village III FRI. Jan 16 9:00PM – Broadway Ctr VI, SLC SUN. Jan 18 8:30PM – Prospector Square TUE. Jan 20 5:30PM – Holiday Village III SAT. Jan 24 5:30PM – Prospector Square

Asshole Vincent Allen goes to the doctor for a diagnosis. The diagnosis: he’s an asshole.

A Kinda Sutra Part insightful documentary and part animated short, Oscar winning filmmaker Jessica Yu has crafted this film about the fanciful childhood misconceptions we have about where babies come from, some of which still prevail today. Some gay perspectives are included as well.

FRI. Jan 16 11:15AM – Racquet Club SAT. Jan 17 11:30PM – Prospector Square TUE. Jan 20 12:15PM – Holiday Village IV WED. Jan 21 6:30PM – Redstone Cinemas SAT. Jan 24 12:45PM – Holiday Village I

SAT. Jan 17 3:00PM – Temple Theatre SUN. Jan 18 9:15PM – Holiday Village IV MON. Jan 19 10:30PM – Broadway Ctr IV, SLC THU. Jan 22 9:00AM – Temple Theatre SAT. Jan 24 3:00PM – Temple Theatre

The Dirty Ones

Knife Point

Two Mennonite sisters are traveling throughout Southern states with the body of their dead grandmother lying in the trunk bed.

FRI. JAN 16 11:15AM - Racquet Club SAT. JAN 17 11:30PM - Prospector Square TUE. JAN 20 12:15PM - HOLIDAY VILLAGE IV WED. JAN 21 6:30PM - Redstone Cinemas SAT. JAN 24 12:45PM - HOLIDAY VILLAGE I

I Am So Proud Of You Animated Short

Dark family secrets cast a shadow over Bill’s recovery; in this second chapter to Don Hertzfeldt’s ‘Everything will be OK’. (Winner of the 2007 Sundance Film Festival Short Film Grand Jury Prize.)

FRI. Jan 16 9:15AM – Holiday Village IV SAT. Jan 17 12:30PM – Rose Wagner, SLC SUN. Jan 18 11:59PM – Egyptian Theatre THU. Jan 22 9:00PM -Egyptian Theatre SAT. Jan 24 3:15PM – Eccles Theatre

FRI. Jan 16 2:15PM – Racquet Club SAT. Jan 17 1:30PM – Broadway Ctr IV, SLC SAT. Jan 17 11:30PM – Holiday Village III WED. Jan 21 8:30PM – Holiday Village III SAT. Jan 24 11:59PM – Egyptian Theatre

Small Collection A love story caught in the corridors of memory. Through fragments of conversations still echoing in now empty places, we piece together the record of a relationship cut short.

FRI. Jan 16 11:30PM – Prospector Square SAT. Jan 17 11:30AM – Library Ctr Theatre SUN. Jan 18 9:00PM – Broadway Ctr VI, SLC THU. Jan 22 11:59PM – Holiday Village IV SAT. Jan 24 8:30PM – Prospector Square

The Nature Between Us Radical dudes, mega babes and a secret crush stumble into a neondrenched universal oneness.

MON. Jan 19 3:15PM – Eccles Theatre TUE. Jan 20 8:30AM – Racquet Club THU. Jan 22 5:15PM – Racquet Club FRI. Jan 23 8:30PM – Library Ctr Theatre SAT. Jan 24 3:30PM – Rose Wagner, SLC

Nobody Knows You, Nobody Gives a Damn

A conservative son is pulled into the messy mission of helping his manipulative drug addicted mother score. In working together they realize they’re not so different, and that some personal qualities are deeply embedded in our genes.

FRI. Jan 16 11:15AM – Racquet Club SAT. Jan 17 11:30PM – Prospector Square TUE. Jan 20 12:15PM – Holiday Village IV WED. Jan 21 6:30PM – Redstone Cinemas SAT. Jan 24 12:45PM – Holiday Village I

2 4 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 119 | J a nua r y 8 , 20 09

The Slammin’ Salmon /USA World Premiere

The owner of a Miami restaurant indebted to the mob institutes a contest to see what waiter can earn the most money in one night. Cast: Cobie Smulders, Michael Clarke Duncan, April Bowlby, Sendhil Ramamurthy, Jay Chandrasekhar, Kevin Heffernan, Paul Soter, Steve Lemme, Erik Stolhanske.

SAT. Jan 17 10:45PM – Treasure Mtn Inn THU. Jan 22 3:00PM – Treasure Mtn Inn

Dish / USA

WORLD PREMIERE

After hearing his Emo high school buddy boast about sexual escapades, gay lad Isreal decides he needs to experience some of his own. “Entertaining, chatty, and teeming with personality. A pleasurable peek into some of the more or less sordid aspects of youth and gay culture,” Sam Roberts, Director of Film Competitions FRI. Jan 16 11:00AM – Treasure Mtn Inn SUN. Jan 18 3:00PM – Treasure Mtn Inn

World Premiere

The Watch / Argentina After a stopped watch leads to a chance meeting on the street, Pablo and Javier end up in an impromptu sleepover, where the two wait nervously for something to happen.

FRI. Jan 16 8:30AM – Holiday Village III FRI. Jan 16 9:00PM – Broadway Ctr VI, SLC SUN. Jan 18 8:30PM – Prospector Square TUE. Jan 20 5:30PM – Holiday Village III SAT. Jan 24 5:30PM – Prospector Square

A Seattle weather girl freaks out onair over her cheating boyfriend, the morning show anchor, and moves in with her little brother. Cast: Tricia O’Kelley, Mark Harmon, Jane Lynch, Kaitlin Olson, Jon Cryer, Patrick J. Adams, Ryan Devlin.

SAT. Jan 17 6:00PM – Treasure Mtn Inn TUE. Jan 20 12:30PM – Treasure Mtn Inn

Mississippi Damned / USA FEATURED NARRATIVE / WORLD PREMIERE

Three poor Black kids in rural Mississippi reap the consequences of their family’s cycle of abuse, addiction, and violence.

Cast: DB Woodside, Malcolm David Kelly, Malcolm Goodwin, Tessa Thompson, Michael Hyatt.

FRI. Jan 16 6:00PM – Treasure Mtn Inn TUE. Jan 20 10:00AM – Treasure Mtn Inn

Graphic Sexual Horror / USA DOCUMETARY NARRATIVE / WORLD PREMIERE

The Young and Evil A highly intelligent but troubled gay black teenager sets out to seduce an HIV-positive prevention advocate into giving him the virus.

FRI. Jan 16 11:15AM – Racquet Club SAT. Jan 17 11:30PM – Prospector Square TUE. Jan 20 12:15PM – Holiday Village IV WED. Jan 21 6:30PM – Redstone Cinemas SAT. Jan 24 12:45PM – Holiday Village I

Predisposed

MON. Jan 19 8:30PM – Treasure Mtn Inn THU. Jan 22 12:30PM – Treasure Mtn Inn

Weather Girl / USA

A young mother struggling with post-partum depression inadvertently connects with her infant child through attempts to sort out her sexual relationships.

FRI. Jan 16 11:59PM – Holiday Village IV SAT. Jan 17 2:30PM – Prospector Square MON. Jan 19 9:15PM – Holiday Village IV FRI. Jan 23 11:59PM – Broadway Ctr VI, SLC SAT. Jan 24 5:30PM – Holiday Village III

Devon Aoki, John Ventimiglia, Jeremy Sisto, Ralph Macchio.

MON. Jan 19 12:15PM – Eccles Theatre TUE. Jan 20 5:15PM – Racquet Club THU. Jan 22 8:30AM – Prospector Square FRI. Jan 23 5:30PM – Library Ctr Theatre SAT. Jan 24 3:00PM – Broadway Ctr VI, SLC

An evangelical family passing through upstate New York gives a ride to an unusual traveling knife salesman.

James / Northern Ireland Young James struggles with his sexuality and his teacher, Mr. Sutherland, is the only person he feels he can connect with. When James finally puts a voice to his feelings, Mr. Sutherland’s response isn’t what James had hoped for.

FRI. Jan 16 12:15PM – Holiday Village IV SAT. Jan 17 8:30AM – Prospector Square SAT. Jan 17 6:00PM – Screening Rm, Sundance WED. Jan 21 6:00PM – Broadway Ctr VI, SLC FRI. Jan 23 9:15PM – Holiday Village IV

TO SUNDANCE • SLAMDANCE QUEER LOUNGE • PARK CITY

SLAMDANCE FILM FESTIVAL Rosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Undead / USA World Premiere

A theatre director takes a job directing a play that uncovers a two thousand year conspiracy involving vampires, Shakespeare, and the holy grail. Cast: Jake Hoffman,

Vapid Lovelies / USA WORLD PREMIERE

Two Middle-American gay fashionistas set out to create the perfect outfit.

FRI. Jan 16 1:00PM – Treasure Mtn Inn MON. Jan 19 11:00AM – Treasure Mtn Inn

Rock Pockets / USA WORLD PREMEIRE

A sugar rush of sex, politics, and rock ‘n’ roll, as seen through the eyes of a 10-year-old-boy at the fair.

TUE. Jan 20 1:00PM – Treasure Mtn Inn WED. Jan 21 11:00AM – Treasure Mtn Inn

A look behind the terrifying façade of insex.com, the most notorious of the ‘violent porn’ websites, while exploring the dark mind of its artistic creator and asking hard questions about personal responsibility.

SUN. Jan 18 8:00PM – Treasure Mtn Inn THU. Jan 22 8:00PM – Treasure Mtn Inn

Drool / USA WORLD PREMIERE

An abused wife’s plan to escape her husband goes awry when she accidentally kills him, causing her to split on a cross-country drive with her best friend and his corpse in tow.

Cast: Laura Harring, Jill Marie Jones, Oded Fehr.

FRI. Jan 16 3:30PM – Treasure Mtn Inn

THU. Jan 22 3:00PM – Treasure Mtn Inn

City Rats / UK FEATURE NARRATIVE / WORLD PREMIERE A modern day Dickensian tale of eight haunted people who meet and fall apart while searching for redemption in each other.

MON. Jan 19 3:30PM – Treasure Mtn Inn THU. Jan 22 6:00PM – Treasure Mtn Inn

A full list of films and schedules is available at sundance.org and ­slamdance.com.

Park City Black Book Hotels/Lodging All Seasons Resorts allseasonsresorts.us Canyons Resort 4000 Canyons Dr., 435-6495400, thecanyons.com.

1904 Imperial Hotel Bed & Breakfast Inn, 221 Main St., 435-649-1904 or 800-669-8824, 1904imperial.com.

Silver Queen Hotel 632 Main St., 435-649-5986 or 800-447-6423, silverqueenhotel. com.

Treasure Mountain Inn 255 Main St., 435-655-4501 or 800-344-2460, treasuremountaininn.com

Food/Restaurants Blind Dog Grill 1781 Sidewinder Dr., 435-655-0800 Burgies 570 Main St., 435-649-0011 Butcher’s Chop House 751 Main St., 435-647-0040 Chimayo 368 Main St., 435-649-6222 East Street Brasserie 201 Heber Ave., 435-658-2500 Loco Cantina Kimball Plaza, 435-645-7000 Shabu 333 Main St., 435-645-7253.

Spur Bar and Grill 350½ Main St., 435-615-1618 350 Main 350 Main St., 435-649-3140 Wasatch Bagel Cafe 1300 Snow Creek Dr., 435-645-7778 Wasatch Brewery Pub 250 Main St., 435-649-0900 Wild Oats Kimball Junction, 435-575-0200

More Information Park City Visitor Information Center 435-658-4541, 800-453-1360, parkcityinfo.com Utah Gay & Lesbian Ski Week 877-429-6368, www.gayskiing. org Sundance Film Festival sundance.org Queer Lounge queerlounge.org

Queer Guide to Park City Andrew Collins

A

hip, gay-friendly and heavily

developed ski community just 30 miles east of Salt Lake, the handsome town of Park City attracts the same Range Rover counterculturalists as Aspen, but it’s considerably more laid-back and friendly. In 1993, after many lesbians and gays boycotted Colorado because of its anti-gay-rights initiatives, Park City lured some of the queer market by holding a gay ski week (Jan. 5–9).

The charming, historic mining town remains a popular getaway for ski and outdoors aficionados as well as movie buffs who visit each January for the prestigious Sundance Film Festival.

Anytime of year, however, Park City offers plenty to keep you busy.

You may stroll along historic Main Street, which contains dozens of upscale restaurants, galleries, and boutiques. At the foot of Main Street a gondola takes skiers (or sightseers) up the hill above town. As a primary winter-sports venue during the 2002 Winter Olympics, Park City saw unprecedented exposure — and growth — during the months leading up to the games.

Park City locals maintain a love-hate relationship with the legions of celebwatchers, film fanatics, and black-clad scenesters who invade the town during Sundance, which will run Jan. 15–25.

The crowds can be extremely intense.

On the other hand, there’s virtually no time of year with a greater gay and lesbian presence. Another advantage to visiting during Sundance is that lift lines at the community’s breathtaking ski resorts are relatively short, as many visitors spend their days watching movies.

If you’re in town during the festival, definitely stop by Queer Lounge, which functions as the town’s gay and lesbian hospitality and information center — it’s an excellent place to network, meet other queer moviegoers, and learn about the festival’s queer content. The lounge also sponsors press conferences and discussions featuring actors and directors of some of the festival’s lesbian and gay flicks.

You may attend movies at Sundance either by paying for tickets a la carte or by purchasing a pass, which admits you to numerous films. Go to www. sundance.org for more information.

You may also attend screenings at Slamdance, a smaller festival that promotes burgeoning filmmakers not yet ready for Sundance.

Jan. 7–11, Park City hosts a relatively modest but still fun Utah Gay & Lesbian Ski Week. To register or learn more call 877-429-6368 or log on to www.gayskiing. org. This modest but festive event consists of several days of great skiing at the town’s three resorts, plus a handful of lunches, dinners and nightclub outings.

Whether or not there are festivals in town, winter easily qualifies as Park City’s high season, a time when it’s often necessary to book hotel rooms several weeks ahead, and when prices tend to be high. If you’re here primarily to ski and snowboard, book a room at the posh Canyons Resort, one of the best — and largest — full-service ski properties in the nation, with two outstanding hotels (the luxury Grand Summit and the upscale but less pricey Sundial Lodge). The spa at the Grand Summit offers a full slate of fun and healthy treatments, including soothing mud pedicures and muscle-relaxing hot-stone therapy. The Canyons is also home to the excellent Cabin restaurant, known for its cioppino (tomatobased fish stew), mesquite-grilled steaks, and the rich chocolate fondue dessert.

If you’d prefer a more intimate property that’s in the heart of downtown, try the 1904 Imperial Hotel Bed & Breakfast Inn, which was opened as a boardinghouse back in Park City’s mining days.

Its rooms offer an intriguing variety of views and configurations — some look up toward the mountains, and others face the bustle of Main Street. Another commendable downtown option is the Silver Queen, a handsome boutique hotel with 12 spacious one- and two-bedroom suites with kitchens, fireplaces, large-screen TVs with DVD players and high-speed Internet.

A larger downtown property, the gay-friendly Treasure Mountain Inn offers a wide range of accommodations, from studios to two-bedroom suites.

It’s also the host during Sundance of the Slamdance film screenings, and it’s home to a hip little breakfast restaurant called Morning Ray, which is a hit with locals. If you’re looking for a condo rental, consider All Seasons Resorts, which represents eight different condo compounds; during Sundance, if you mention Queer Lounge when booking your room, you’ll receive a discount.

Park City abounds with great restaurants and bars. For stellar French fare, try East Street Brasserie, known for its braised lamb shanks with mushroom fricassee and Valrhona chocolate souffle. Sip wine and people-watch next door in the restaurant’s swank lounge, Le Bar Boheme. 350 Main serves some of the more creative fare in town, including black-pepper-crusted venison medallions with blackberry-shiitake jus and cranberry-orange marmalade.

Head next door to the Spur Bar and Grill if you want to mingle with locals and nosh on simpler food, such as grilled buffalo bratwurst and smoked turkey quesadillas.

Blind Dog Grill is a cool little spot with a trendy ambience and such tasty food as cashew-crusted grouper with charred-tomato vinaigrette. Although

the main dining room at Butcher’s Chop House is a bit stuffy, the side bar has a warm and cozy feel. You may order off the main menu (filet mignon, King crab legs) or from a light cafe menu, which still offers sizable portions and delicious food: chickenand-papaya quesadillas, chop salad, ahi-tuna spring rolls.

Stylish Shabu serves delicious, socalled freestyle Asian cuisine, such as crab cakes and wontons over greens with pickled ginger and ponzu aioli, and sea bass with ginger, chive and a garlic-black bean paste; there’s live acoustic music on Friday evenings.

Chimayo serves creative Southwestern food, including pumpkin-seed-encrusted gulf shrimp stuffed with spinach, and grilled buffalo flank steak with wild mushrooms, corn, and poblanopotato gratin.

Plenty of locals favor Burgies for inexpensive and tasty breakfasts, lunches and dinners — try the French toast in the morning or the chilicheeseburger later in the day. There’s a sports bar upstairs. Wasatch Brewery Pub is fun and also hosts one of the parties during gay ski week. Fill up on baby back ribs or coconut-and-beerbatter shrimp. Park City’s favorite coffeehouse is Wasatch Bagel Cafe, which serves wraps, panini sandwiches, bagels and all sorts of espresso drinks.

Although it’s set in a shopping center near the interstate, Loco Cantina is a slick space with above-average Mexican fare, such as chicken-mole enchiladas, poblano-corn chowder, and fish tacos. It’s a good bet if you’re hungry after scouring the nearby Tangier Outlet Shops, which are right off I-40, for bargains. Also on this side of town, in the brand-new Redstone development, is a Wild Oats supermarket, which sells gourmet and healthful prepared foods, sandwiches, soups, salads and the like — it’s great for take-out and indispensable for groceries if you’re staying someplace with kitchen facilities. Redstone also has a number of shops and restaurants, plus a movie theater. Q

J a nua r y 9, 20 0 9 | issue 119 | QSa lt L a k e | 25

Save the Date

Q A&E

Major Events of the Community

Gay Agenda Say What?

january 7–11, 2009 Utah Gay & Lesbian Ski Week, Park City ­ gayskiing.org january 9–11, 2009 Queer Spirit Winter Retreat, Spring City ­ queerspirit.org

by Tony Hobday

I don’t know what to say here except for that I’m attempting to quit smoking. So in reality my creativeness, ingenuity, wit and zest for life are currently snubbed out. I’m so bitchy these days — yes, more so than usual Stan and Big Momma — that I’ve decided to extend my apparent vow of celibacy until snapping rubber bands against my extremity as behavior modification to help me quit smoking no longer stings like a banshee.

8

thursDAY — You’re a liar if you don’t think Zac Efron is a total dream boat. But wait until you meet Zack Teflon, the rebellious teenager in Desert Star’s Home School Musical ... in your face Vanessa Hudgens! Anyhoo, Zack and his buds, including Linoleum Dynamite, attempt to save the home school program from becoming defunct by a psychotic congressman. Shit, that bitch ain’t gotta chance gettin’ up in Zack ... what?

7pm, through Mar. 21, Desert Star Dinner Theatre, 4861 S. State Street. Tickets $8.95–14.95, 266-2600 or desertstar.biz.

9

FRIDAY — His “From Fairy Queens to Warriors” exhibit is currently showing at the Thomas Kearns McCarthey Gallery in Park City, but Trevor Southey will be in person tonight at this special wine & cheese reception benefitting Equality Utah. Southey, a BYU alum, has been an artist for over 40 years, and his many works have been commissioned not only within the United States, but abroad as well.

7—9pm, Thomas Kearns McCarthey Gallery, 444 Main Street, Park City. Free, djfa.

com or trevorsouthey.com.

QQ So I checked out tid-bits of comedian Suzanne Westenhoefer on YouTube and I have to say the woman is damn funny. She pokes at her girlfriend(s), gay boys, lesbians, her parents and just about any experience she’s ever had with improvisational wit and goofy expressions.

Almost exactly one year to the day she returns to Salt Lake to once again make the homos laugh.

8pm, Jeanne Wagner Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. Broadway. Tickets $27.50– 34.50, 355-ARTS or arttix.org.

10

SATURDAY — I can’t believe it’s already time again for the Fabulous Fun Bus to Wendover. Don’t get me wrong, it’s a total freakin’ hoot, but it also wears you out like a pair of Brad Pitts’ undies ... what? Anyhoo, come play with the big boys and girls — I hear Rusty Faucet will be joining us, woohoo!

Noon–9pm, pick up at Club Try-Angles, a private club for members, 251 W. 900 South.

Tickets $21, 1-800-838-3006 or gaywendover.com.

12

MONDAY — Lesbian singer/songwriter Sarah Slaton hits the Salt Lake stage as a solo artist. Check out her very unique voice and silly sense of humor... hopefully she’ll do her cover of “Ice, Ice Baby” or maybe she’ll make the audience play musical chairs ... who knows what this zany chick’s going to pull. Coles Whalen opens.

7pm, Poplar Street Pub, 242 S. 200 West.

Tickets $5 at the door, 364-1061.

14

WEDNESDAY — Equality Utah wants you to Film your Common Ground Initiative story. If you’ve been fired or evicted for sexual orientation or gender identity or if you want your gay or transgender child to be able to be part of a Domestic Partner Registry, go and share your story. Tell

26 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 119 | J a nua r y 8 , 20 09

Utah in 30-60 seconds why these bills affect you and yours.

7–9pm, Cafe Marmalade at Utah Pride Center, 361 N. 300 West. Free, 539-8800 or utahpridecenter.org.

15

THURSDAY — Nine gay men at a birthday party in an Upper East Side New York apartment ... oh, the anarchial sexcapades ... what? Anyhoo, Wasatch Theatre presents The Boys in the Band, a “truly honest portrayal of the lives of contemporary homosexuals,” even though it takes place in the 1960s. For full synopsis, see article on the next page.

8pm, through Jan. 31, Studio Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. Broadway. Tickets $15, 355-ARTS or arttix.org.

QQ The Sundance Film Festival starts today, and there are plenty of great films to be seen. But there’s more than just movies — stargazing, freezing your tush off, parties at Queer Lounge, parties in the street, parties in your pants ... what? Don’t miss this event, you have a chance of meeting flamers, I mean famers such as Tilda Swinton, Rex Lee and even Chris Lemon ... holy shit!

Times, venues & events vary, through Jan. 25, Park City. For more information and ticketing, visit sundance.org, queerlounge.org and slamdance.com.

16

FRIDAY — Daren Young, who also holds a BFA in painting and drawing from the University of Utah, says, “One of the myriad aspects of my identity is that I am a gay man. Being gay has always been an important element of the work I produce and is the focus of the art I created during my graduate work. While my experiences as a gay man are not unique, the way I express these experiences is what sets me apart as an artist.” Join Daren during tonight’s reception

january 15–25, 2009 Sundance Film Festival, Park City­ sundance.org january 18, 2009 Affirmation: Martin Luther King Weekend Event­ affirmation.org january 27, 2009 Equality on Campus Day­ studentsforequality.com february 13–15, 2009 QUAC Ski N Swim ­ quacquac.org april 17, 2009 Day Of Silence ­ dayofsilence.org June 6–7, 2009 Utah Pride ­ utahpride.org June 20, 2009 HRC Utah Gala ­ hrcutah.org June 25–28, 2009 Utah Arts Festival ­ uaf.org July 24–26, 2009 Utah Bear Ruckus utahbears.com August 1–2, 2009 Park City Arts Festival kimball-art.org August 7–8, 2009 Redrock Women’s Music Festival, Torrey redrockwomensfest.com August 19, 2009 EU Allies Dinner equalityutah.org

Email arts@­qsaltlake.com for consideration to be included in Save the Date.

of the opening of his new exhibit, HOMO/Evocative.

6–9pm reception, 10am–6pm regualr gallery hours, exhibit runs through Feb. 13, Art Access Gallery, 230 S. 500 West. Free, 328-0703 or darenyoung.com.

17

Saturday — PlanB Theatre Company, SB Dance, Salt Lake Acting Company and Ririe-Woodbury Dance Company join together to support Equality Utah’s Common Ground Initiative with the event CELEBRATING COMMON GROUND: THE ARTS COMMUNITY CELEBRATES EQUALITY to kick off Human Rights Weekend. The evening features dance pieces by SB Dance and RirieWoodbury; letters-to-the-editor from various publications read by actors from Plan-B/SLAC; and the world premiere of a new, 10-minute play entitled What You Get by local playwright Matthew Ivan Bennett.

8pm, Black Box Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. Broadway. Suggested donation $10, equalityutah.org.

QQ Based on the play The Little Foxes by Lillian Hellman, the American opera Regina is set in the Deep South in the year 1900, and chronicles the demise of a wealthy southern family torn apart by greed. Regina Giddens schemes and double-crosses until she is left with only her wealth and loneliness.

7:30pm, through Jan. 25, Capitol Theatre, 50 W. 200 South. Tickets $15–72, 355-ARTS or arttix.org.

19

MONday — Of A Revolution, more commonly known as O.A.R., hits Salt Lake tonight. The sexy six-member band has been rocking the house since 1996 ... although whose house?

They hadn’t really seen the limelight until the single “Shattered” hit the airwaves. Whatever, six sweaty guys bangin’ ... stuff on stage is supercalifragilisticexpialidocious ... what?

8pm, The Depot, 400 W. South Temple. Tickets $25/adv–$27.50/day of show, 467-8499 or smithstix.com.

UPCOMING EVENTS feb. 06 Amy Ray, Avalon Theater feb. 10 Katy Perry, In The Venue feb. 22 Celine Dion, ES Arena APR. 14 Britney Spears, ES Arena

A Band of Outcasts Acts Out Interview by Tony Hobday

W

Theatre Company presents a production of The Boys in the Band, a sharp, unrelenting play about homosexuality in the 1960s — prior to the Stonewall Riots, prior to the warrant of HIV/AIDS. During that time the climate surrounding homosexuality was ominous with homophobia, but what playwright Matt Crowley explored in this play, what some would say, was internal homophobia.

The play is set in 1968. In an apartment in New York City’s Upper East Side, the action concerns nine acquaintances who converge for the birthday of Harold (Alexis Baigue), who is turning 30 (ah, a comingof-troll age story, the gay man’s menopausal years).

Throwing the bash is Michael (Eric McGraw), a man of fierce self loathing and an alcoholic undergoing psychoanalysis. Joining them is Bernard (Brien Jones), a black man not only facing homophobia but racism, a feat harder to overcome due to his attraction to a wealthy white man; Larry and Hank (Richard Wall and Jay Cates, respectively), a couple living together despite having differing views on the issue of monogamy; Emory (Bryan Glick), a childish and flamboyant “queen;” and Donald (Michael Cox), also adamantly deferring acceptance of his homosexual lifestyle.

Also stirred into the mix is a male prostitue called Cowboy (Andrew Abbott), who is a “present” for Harold, and Alan (Daniel Ogden), a straight college buddy of Michael’s whose sexuality becomes more and more questionable throughout the evening.

Director Gail McCullough said, “[The play] has been compared to Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf, which was scathing but also a very contemporary piece of theatre. I think it was just what was happening at the time — whether it was women and men or men and men — there were a lot of changes in terms of relationships and what people felt there part in a relationship was. I think everybody in the ’60s, especially young people, were beginning to examine stereotypes and saying ‘well, is this really true?’” asatch

Dece mber 18 , 20 08 | issue 118 | QSa lt L a k e | 27

When I recently sat down with Gail for this interview, I was slightly unprepared when the entire cast sat down with us. A row of nine chairs occupied by handsome, articulate and intelligent actors. I first felt like a voodoosize doll of Oprah, and as the interview progressed I realized the significance of the play (for me) just by sharing approximately 30 minutes with a group of mostly gay acquaintances. Not that it was a painful experience, far from it.

In fact, it seemed they had a great respect for each other and even playfully joked with each other.

“I think we’ve become really close as a cast and it’s taken a lot of sex to get there,” Cox quipped.

The following question was responded to by each actor. However, though each of them shared personal and intriguing responses, I was alloted only so much space for the article, so I apologize to those whose responses have been excluded.

ance that out.

BRYAN GLICK: I play the true queen of the show, if there is one. [The cast laughs.] He’s a man who’s in his mid30s and arguably the most immature person at the party. I wanted to play Emory because it was an opportunity to see how far I could push myself with my own notions of my sexual orientation. I’m definitely nelly to a certain degree but not nearly as far out there as he is. Realistically, there’s not a lot of his backstory mentioned and I think that kind of implies that he disappeared when he was 17 and mentally, he stopped growing up.

JAY CATES: My character Hank is a guy trying to find monogamy and wants to raise a family. I feel similar to the character because I have struggled like that to keep a relationship monogamous. It’s almost unrealisitc in the gay world if you ask me. I mean you can disagree with that, but in my experience it’s been really hard, so I think were still facing that same issue.

DANIEL OGDEN: I feel very similar to Alan. I’m in the closet [The cast laughs.} I’m a lawyer. [More laughter.] And I’m always sort of getting crushes on guys who like to play tennis. I’m also very sarcastic.

Alexis: And don’t forget about the alcoholism.

Daniel: Oh yeah, the liver damage.

TONY HOBDAY: How much of you personally is similar to the charcter you portray?

ALexis BAIGUE: I think most of my friends would kindly say I’m disimilar to Harold in that I’m a goyish Mormon from Utah and he’s an ugly pockmarked Jew fairy ... well fairy we have in common. I like to behave, most of the time, differently than this character in the play. But when I read it I certainly saw a great deal of myself in the character.

BRIEN JONES: For me the character is so unlike me. It was hard when I read the script because there’s real harsh racism in it. It’s been difficult for me to be passive and to listen to the language that’s so hard and ugly. To not have a release or retaliation ... I mean there is a little bit with my character, Bernard, but he really seems to absorb what is directed at him, which is not like me. Gail and I have had long sobbing conversations about how I adjust my own perspective to that of the character. It was difficult to bal-

RICHARD WALL: I have some similarities to Larry. He’s a commercial artist, and I feel to some degree that I have an artistic eye. But there are also disimilarities considering that I’m a heterosexual in a monogamous relationship. But that’s no reason not to try and build the character as realistically as possible and fill in the blanks with as many of my own personal experiences as possible.

The Boys in the Band are “a band of outsiders — a secret little group” that face a time of distinct homophobia that “corrupts society but also corrupts gay people themselves.”

“What’s really great about this play is that in the ’60s there was this sort of absurdist tradition where everything didn’t have to make sense,” said Eric McGraw. “So there are little tangents that happen. [Not everything] is fully explained so it really opens the audience’s imagination. Nothing is clear-cut.”

Daniel Ogden added, “Everyone shoud come see this play. You’re gonna laugh, you’re gonna cry, you’re going to be offended.” Q The Boys in the Band opens Jan. 15 and runs Thurs.-Sat. through Jan. 31, Studio Theatre, Rose Wagner Center. Tickets $15, 355-ARTS or arttix.org.

J a nua r y 9, 20 0 9 | issue 119 | QSa lt L a k e | 27

locals Pitch in to make queer lounge fabulous

by JoSelle Vanderhooft

E

ven though the new year has Just begun,

are kinda funky,” she said. “They’ll also have price materials locals are using in this year’s Lounge Mike Picardi is already up to his elbows in tags if people want to buy them.” are also easy on Mother Earth, which Picardi and In the wake of Proposition 8, the controversial work at m pIcarDI fIne cuSTom furnIShIngS, Huang say is always a priority for the Lounge. the furniture manufacturing and upholstery Picardi said he is using such eco-friendly materimeasure re-banning gay marriage in California, and the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints’ company he has owned for the last 32 years. als as faux leather and wood from reforested wood Along with serving his typical clients, Picardi support for the measure, many gay rights activists farms to build his furniture. And in the spirit of is also building and refurbishing furniture for the shopping local first, the Lounge has also brought on across the country called for a boycott of Sundance Queer Lounge, the popular Sundance Film Festival a Salt Lake City-based designer for one of its floors. and all things Utah. Although some festival-goers hangout for queer filmmakers and supporters of films featuring gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender themes. Now in its sixth year, the lounge will open its doors Jan. 15 to the general public at the independent film festival.

Currently, Picardi and his employees are working on building a number of ottomans and refurbishing some of the furniture the lounge used last year, including sofas, dining room chairs and even some bench seating for the Absolut Vodka lounge, which will be held on the first floor of the Montgomery-Lee Fine Art Gallery which is again home to Queer Lounge this year. “[Absolut] is introducing [their lounge] as a tie-in for Absolut Mango,” said Picardi. “It’s a new flavor they’re introducing at Sundance, so the color scheme will be geared toward the color of mango. We’re doing a lot of bright yellow and white.”

Picardi is just one of several Utahns, gay and straight, who are donating their time, labor and creativity to making this year’s Queer Lounge a success. And without their help, said Ellen Huang, the Lounge’s founder and program director, the Lounge “couldn’t survive.”

“It’s very difficult to fly in people who don’t know the local resources and try to assemble a lounge when you need materials from locals,” she explained.

M. Picardi Fine Custom Furnishings designed and built the furniture used at the Queer Lounge, as shown in this photo from 2008.

Huang added that most local volwondered if the Queer Lounge would go ahead unteers have participated in the lounge for several While Los Angeles designer Alejandro Rivera in this political atmosphere, Huang said that the years, or are friends and acquaintances of long-time will design the Lounge’s Absolut Lounge and the Lounge is more timely now than ever before. In volunteers. One of the latter is Manoli Sargetakis, night club-style lounge on the gallery’s top floor, fact, she said, the Lounge will hold a panel on Jan. who, along with brothers John and Ted and mother local designer Julie Assenberg, owner of design 18 at 2:30 p.m. in which gay filmmakers have played Kaliope, owns SIlver STaTe SupplIerS, a wholesale company DIgS, will design the Lounge’s middle a role in grass roots activism on gay rights causes upholstery and fabric company, are providing covfloor — a more casual lounge that will host panels ers for Picardi’s furniture. A friend of Picardi’s for of gay filmmakers. Her company’s specialization in including Prop. 8.

She added that a boycott of Utah would likely several years, Sargetakis first donated fabric and creating stellar designs with materials from estate hurt the very people who can help to change the time to the Lounge in 2008. sales and secondhand stores fits right in with the current political climate.

“Besides having similar business interests, we Queer Lounge’s theme of reusing and recycling. “[Gay Utahns and their straight allies] are the have similar political interests, and here in Utah “We’re using a new product on the walls called first line of defense working and pressuring the that’s hard to find,” said Sargetakis, who identifies Velon designs,” said Assenberg, who identifies as Mormon Church to change,” she said. “We need as straight. “[The Queer Lounge] is a good cause straight and who is on board for the first time this and it involves some really good people.” year. “The walls are all going to be covered in black to create more institutional change and dialogue, and people like Mike Picardi represent the face of Sargetakis’ company will be donating “high tech” and white damask. Pretty wild.” vinyls and furniture covers this year.

To complement the black and white walls and the the gay community to his LDS clients. So when you talk about acting locally to change things globally it “It also has anti-microbial and anti-bacterial white furniture on this level of the Lounge, Assenstarts in Utah.” features, so you can even use it for health care,” berg says she plans on adding “punches of color” he said of the materials. “That wasn’t the reason it in the form of things like pillows and tables done in Information on panel discussions and other events was was chosen for the Lounge of course, but for its fun “reds and bright yellows.” not available at press time. For more information about the colors.”

“My plan is to bring up some of the furniture I’ve Queer Lounge visit queerlounge.org.

Along with being fun and vibrant, many of the collected at estate sales and secondhand stores that

PROGRAMMING FREE & OPEN TO THE PUBLIC All panels take place at 608 Main Street, Park City, Utah – 3rd floor TRYING TIMES: THE FUTURE OF LGBT FILM FESTIVALS Saturday, January 17, 2009, 12:00PM Queer film festivals face an uncertain future in the current economic climate.

SHORT FILMS – YES, THERE IS A MARKET! Saturday, January 17, 2009, 3:00PM How can shorts be used to raise capital for feature films, or turn a profit all on their own?

LGBT CIVIL RIGHTS, FILM ACTIVISM & PROP. 8 Sunday, January 18, 2009, 2:30PM Filmmakers play a role in LGBT grassroots movements including No on Prop. 8.

Join Oscar™ winning director Rob Epstein and others for a timely discussion.

O T N I W O D N I AW E C N A D N U S CINEMA AT

BEHIND-THE-SCENES TO THE SCREEN: NAVIGATING HOLLYWOOD WITH LGBT CONTENT Monday, January 19, 2009, 3:00PM Hear from filmmakers skilled at steering their LGBT films through the Hollywood system.

LA MISSION: A STORY OF CULTURE, CLASS AND INTOLERANCE Tuesday, January 20, 2009, 1:00PM Director Peter Bratt, actor Benjamin Bratt and consulting producer John Amaechi discuss the issue of homophobia in minority communities in their latest film La MISSION. ROAD TO PARK CITY AND BEYOND: LAUNCHING YOUR FILM CAREER Co-Sponsored by Film Independent.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009, 3:00PM There are many ways to get a film career off the ground, but not every plan works for every person.

THE OUTSIDERS: FORMING IDENTITIES FROM THE MARGINS Wednesday, January 21, 2009, 12:00PM Noon Join panelists from festival films Dare, Push and City Rats for a discussion of young people discovering their identities from outside the mainstream.

The HUB for LGBT and LGBT-FRIENDLY FESTIVAL-GOERS during SUNDANCE and other PARK CITY FILM FESTIVALS

• NETWORKING • PARTIES • LGBT FILM INFO • FREE WI-FI • PANELS queerlounge.org

EVENT DESIGNER

MEDIA SPONSOR

OFFICIAL AIRLINE

UTAH SGAY &LESBIAN NEW S &EN TERTAINMENT M AGAZINE

QUEER LOUNGE IS A PROGRAM OF THE GAY & LESBIAN ALLIANCE AGAINST DEFAMATION (GLAAD), WHICH IS DEDICATED TO PROMOTING AND ENSURING FAIR, ACCURATE AND INCLUSIVE REPRESENTATION OF PEOPLE AND EVENTS IN THE MEDIA AS A MEANS OF ELIMINATING HOMOPHOBIA AND DISCRIMINATION BASED ON GENDER IDENTITY AND SEXUAL ORIENTATION. FOR MORE INFORMATION, GO TO WWW.GLAAD.ORG. QUEER LOUNGE IS NOT AFFILIATED WITH SUNDANCE OR ANY FILM FESTIVAL. PHOTO BY GABRIEL GOLDBERG. DESIGN BY BEVERLY LORENC.

J a nua r y 9, 20 0 9 | issue 119 | QSa lt L a k e | 29

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Food & Wine

Sunday Brunch at Fiddler’s Elbow

by Bryan Woolley

There seems to be a weekly ritual that is a time tested truth in our community.

This tested truth I’m referring to is the sacred ritual of Sunday Brunch. On my ongoing quest to find the truest brunch of all, I stumbled upon Sunday buffet well worth trying at Fiddler’s Elbow.

If you haven’t been to Fiddler’s Elbow in a while, you will be surprised to find out that it is now a private club. Since drinking is a sin in Utah you have to pay your penitence before you enter a club in the form of an annual membership fee. Since we were all sinners, the penitence had been paid already by several of our group members and we were seated within a matter of minutes upon arriving.

We were ushered past the sports paraphernalia, large screen TV’s, pool tables and tables full of avid sports fans cheering on their favorite teams.

We arrived at the back patio which had been enclosed for the Winter. Portable heaters dotted the area around us producing so much heat that we had to request them to be adjusted.

When we were seated the regular routine of restaurant eating was engaged. Waters were brought to the table as well as menus and requests for drinks. Drink orders were taken and than the majority of the table got up and headed to the buffet. I just couldn’t bring myself to head immediately to the buffet. The memory of a fifty dollar bill for a similar buffet was still fresh in my mind. I searched the menu for the buffet and was pleasantly surprised find it modestly priced at $11.95. I jumped up and got into the

buffet line. The regular buffet items were there like scrambled eggs, bacon, french toast and such. What made this buffet unique was the prime rib, ham roasts, made to order omelets, and freshly baked brownies and rolls, salad fixings and much more. I filled my plate and made an order for an omelet.

Sat down and started the enjoyable sermon of my Sunday Brunch.

It’s rare to find a reasonably priced prime rib Sunday brunch buffet. I just happened on this one by luck. If you like to watch sports, have a mimosa or a beer with your Sunday brunch, I’ve found the perfect place, Fiddler’s Elbow. I will defiantly be heading back for seconds!

Fiddler’s Elbow 1063 E. 2100 South, Salt Lake City Open Mon–Thur 11am–11pm, Fri 11am–midnight, Sat 10am–midnight, Sun 9am–10pm

J a nua r y 9, 20 0 9 | issue 119 | QSa lt L a k e | 3 1

Q Hollywood

By Romeo San Vicente

Q doku

Each Sudoku puzzle has a unique solution which can be reached logically without guessing. Enter digits 1 through 9 into the blank spaces. Every row must contain one of each digit, as must each column and each 3x3 square. Qdoku is actually five seperate, but connected, Sudoku puzzles.

Medium

8 9 6 9

2 3 8

3 9

7 1

3 5 4 1 5

4 2 8

4 7 9

8 9 6 4 5

4

8

9

7 9 1

8 4 2 3

6 9 8 8 1 3

1 9 2 4

3 6

4 1 7

7 9 6

2 4 6 9 7 5 8 6

2 2 9 8

7

7

2

8 4

8 5 8

2

32 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 119 | J a nua r y 8 , 20 09

9 1 6 8

4 3 9

4 9

2 6

6

6 4 1

5

8 9 3 9 1

4 9

6 9

4 5 9 4

8 6 4

8

1 6 7 4 1 8

6 3 2 3 1 9 7 6 8

6

1

4

7 8

7 6 3

Shankman Sails with Sinbad From big screen confections like Hairspray to the subversive online delight Prop. 8: The Musical, gay director Adam Shankman thrives on spectacle.

So it’s a nobrainer that the box-office-friendly filmmaker would want to resurrect a vintage crowdpleasing hero like high-seas adventurer Sinbad. Shankman’s been hired to direct The 8th Voyage of Sinbad, and he’s eager for the project to leave port and start sailing soon. Getting a leading man confirmed would help — though both Keanu Reeves and Vin Diesel have been attached to the project, neither are currently signed, and there’s no guarantee they will. Of course, if this long-in-development project creeps along at the pace it’s been moving, the kid from Two and a Half Men will soon be old enough to play Sinbad.

So like everything in Hollywood, it’ll happen when the stars align.

Chenoweth Leaps from Daisies to Legally Mad Actress and singer Kristin Chenoweth is currently dominating the competition in the running to be America’s next top gay-adored celebrity. She’s endeared herself to queer fans with her lead role in Broadway’s Wicked, her hilarious (and often tuneful) role on the brilliantly inventive and now tragically cancelled Pushing Daisies, and the shockingly funny online musical Intervention, a parody involving a gay meth-head who needs show tunes to guide him to rehab. And for Daisies fans who need a regular TV fix of the tiny, sassy lady, Chenoweth has already lined up a new TV gig. She’ll co-star on Legally Mad, a new lawyer show from David E. Kelley, as sprightly attorney Skippy Pylon, the daughter of the head of a big Chicago law firm.

Skippy is described as an occasionally psychotic woman who enjoys be-

ing mistaken for a teenager. Sounds perfect! Look for the show on NBC. Oxygen Is Addicted to Beauty What hath Sunset Tan wrought?

That compellingly trashy reality series about the everyday dramas and intrigues of life in a Hollywood tanning salon was just the gateway drug for fans of dazzlingly ridiculous reality TV. In other words, get ready for the human apocalypse of Addicted to Beauty, Oxygen’s latest reality entry. It’s about the inner workings and, no doubt, odd-yet-sexy employees of a medi-spa where women (and those gay guys you see who are really into cosmetic surgery) can go in for a quick little lift, tuck, or Botox injection. Juggling what room is left on the TiVo schedule after this, Sunset, Celebrity Rehab and occasional appearances by Janice Dickinson on QVC will be a difficult maintenance task all its own, but devoted watchers of junk television will surely find a way. Watch for ads featuring overplump lips to begin popping up in cities across the country sometime this year.

Meet The People I’ve Slept With Romeo admits that his attention is easily captured by a provocative title, but that’s not the only reason to get excited about the upcoming feature The People I’ve Slept With. For one thing, it’s directed by queer filmmaker Quentin Lee, whose provocative and compelling filmography includes festival faves like the hilarious Shopping for Fangs, Drift, and the loverson-the-run epic Ethan Mao. This time around, Lee has assembled a cast that includes gay hottie Wilson Cruz, veteran actor James Shigeta (Flower Drum Song, Die Hard), and up-andcoming indie performers Karin Anna Cheung (Better Luck Tomorrow) and Danny Vasquez (Quinceanera) for the sexy ensemble comedy. Be on the lookout for this one when film-festival season rolls around in the spring — and maybe bring someone you’ve slept with to see it.

Romeo San Vicente thought about making a movie called “The People Who Want To Sleep With Me,” but a five-hour epic documentary would be way too expensive to produce.

CLUB RY 17 A U N A J , Y A D SATUR

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J a nua r y 9, 20 0 9 | issue 119 | QSa lt L a k e | 33

David Daniels

Q Sports

By Dan Woog amal Brown spent four years at Dartmouth College running, studying and trying to figure out where he felt most comfortable: in its small gay community, or its equally tiny African-American one.

A year after leaving, the Ivy League graduate still does not know.

“It was a constant struggle,” Brown recalls. “I had black female friends, but not a lot of black male friends. I was generally respected by the black community as an athlete, but at times I wasn’t acknowledged because I’m gay. And the gay community there really embodied white gays. To this day, I’m trying to find out where I belong.”

Brown’s road to the rural New Hampshire campus began 3,000 miles away, in Sacramento, Calif. He was an only child, but his many male cousins helped create a “macho sports environment.” In high school Brown was a successful track and cross-country runner, but spent much of high school denying his attraction to other guys.

“I butched up my voice,” he says. “I blasted hardcore music. I cried and wondered, ‘why me?’ It was pretty stressful through junior year — not a lot of fun.”

Early in his senior year, Brown and his best friend — a fellow yearbook editor and student government leader — came out to each other. “We supported each other,” he says. “But I still could not be free. There were still no gay athletes to look up to.”

As an African American, Brown felt an expectation to “embody a great sense of masculinity.” “I was supposed to be manly and straight.”

By the end of senior year, he worried much less. He’d achieved academic and athletic success; he was heading east to a prestigious school. The summer after graduation was “incredible.” He attended his first Gay Pride event, in San Francisco, and hung out at gay clubs.

Yet Brown still led a double life. He was not out to his family, and though he had come out in his Dartmouth application essay, he wondered what being a gay college athlete would be like. The school had a reputation for homophobia, Brown says, so he prepared for four years in the closet.

When he arrived on campus, he saw “open and honest” gay people. As their gaydar kicked in and they smiled at him, he felt terrified. But soon he met the man who would become his boyfriend, and slowly Brown came out — but only outside the locker room.

He was terrified what his Big Green teammates would say. If he’d been forced to decide, Brown says he would have chosen track over his boyfriend.

But that was a frustrating position to be in, so one day Brown changed his Facebook profile to “interested in men.”

The first reaction from a teammate surprised him: The runner told Brown, “We’ll always be there for you.” As it turned out, they were.

J Registration is Open for QUAC Ski-N-Swim Queer Utah Aquatics Club, better known as QUAC, is gearing up for the 2009 Ski-n-Swim, Feb. 13–15.

Online registration for the event is now available at ski-n-swim.com/registration.html The weekend will be kicked off with an opening social at Trolley Square on Feb. 13.

A ski and snowshoeing day at Snowbird follows on Saturday, Feb. 14, followed by a discounted spa visit at the Cliff Lodge. That night there will also be a hosted desserts night.

Being Black at Big Green

The official swim meet for members of the United States Masters Swimming takes place on Sunday, Feb. 15 at the University of Utah aquatic center.

Temporary USMS memberships will be available at the opening social or on deck prior to the meet. The public is welcome to watch the meet without registering.

The event closes with a social at Club Jam on Sunday, Feb. 15.

Online registration for the event is available at ski-n-swim.com/registration.html

3 4 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 119 | J a nua r y 8 , 20 09

Brown eased into talking about his boyfriend with the team. When he came out to his coach, Sandra Ford-Centonze, she became his “second mom.” He calls his track experience “phenomenal.” “I never thought I’d have that relationship with a varsity coach, or at a Division I team. I feel incredibly privileged.”

At the same time, Brown heard comments that made him cringe — “pansy” and “that’s so gay” flew around the locker room. Then there were the things he didn’t hear, but sensed. “The sprinting culture is strongly masculine,” Brown says. “I know people said stuff when I wasn’t around.”

Though he was an out, proud and accomplished runner, at times he felt alone.

“I had no one to connect with,” Brown laments. “And there were no resources at Dartmouth for gay male athletes.” Whenever he performed badly, Brown wondered if others thought it was because he was gay. He pondered quitting.

Brown worked through his issues by involving himself in LGBT campus groups. And, he says, despite his discouragement, his teammates did indeed pull him through.

“No matter how many times I was pissed off by a seemingly benign joke, they always encouraged me. They wanted me to compete and do my best.”

Ultimately he says his college experience was a good one. “I went through so many positive and negative things,” Brown says, but notes that he’d do it all again. “I learned so much, and met so many great people. I learned never to give up, and constantly challenge everyone around me. I learned to love life.”

Before he graduated, a first-year teammate came out to Brown. The younger athlete said he’d met Brown as a high school junior; Brown’s insights into gay life at Dartmouth encouraged him to apply.

“I cried tears of joy that night,” Brown says. “I’ll never forget beautiful moments like that.”

Dan Woog is a journalist, educator, soccer coach, gay activist and author of the “Jocks” series of books on gay male athletes. Visit his Web site at www.danwoog.com.

3 6 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 119 | J a nua r y 8 , 20 09

Non-Smoking Great Sicilian Food Available

KARAOKE SUNDAYS AND TUESDAYS

201 East 300 South Salt Lake City 801-519-8900 www.tavernacle.com A Private Club for Members

J a nua r y 9, 20 0 9 | issue 119 | QSa lt L a k e | 3 7

DOLLAR DRAFTS Sundays, Mondays and Wednesdays OLDIES Mondays DUELING PIANOS Wednesdays through Saturdays

Q Puzzle

What A Character!

Featuring gay characters on current TV shows

Across 1 Protection for one’s head 6 Ginsberg’s “Nagasaki ___” 10 The Lion King cad 14 Seedy dwelling 15 ___ instant (like premature ejaculation) 16 Lorca’s zip 17 LuPone Broadway role 18 Peppermint sweet you can lick 19 Cutlass, e.g.

20 Gay brother on Brothers and Sisters 23 Grassi of Queer as Folk 24 Maryland athlete 25 Output for Simon Sheppard and Carol Queen 27 Writer Castillo 30 Closemouthed 32 Streisand’s crossdressing movie 33 Taylor of Six Feet Under 35 Pose for Bruce Weber 36 Gore Vidal, ___ Edgar Box 37 Gay art director on Mad Men 43 Senatorial seat holders, e.g.

3 8 | QSa lt L a k e

44 Thurman of Even Cowgirls Get the Blues 45 Tune type 46 Rock singer of Greek mythology?

49 Fail to leave a tip, at Star Canyon 51 Mary, in Montmartre (abbr.)

52 Fresh fruit, e.g.

54 Swedish import 56 Fisherman’s tool 57 Gay assistant on Ugly Betty 62 Chelsea Pines and others 64 Romantic island for gay honeymoons 65 “___ my case!”

(Perry Mason’s close) 66 Patty Sheehan supporters 67 Capable of performing 68 Style Tracy Turnblad’s hair 69 Fruit-flavored ice cream maker 70 Sighted at a gay bar 71 It makes the bottom line bigger Down 1 Chiang Kai-___ 2 Shore opening 3 Word on a map of Israel 4 “___ Be” 5 Uranus, for one 6 Rimbaud portrayer in Total Eclipse 7 Like a meticulous bottom?

8 Doodle on Broadway 9 Look from Snidely Whiplash

10 Cone head?

11 Gay college student on Greek 12 Crackhead, e.g.

13 One who may act up 21 Snatches 22 Columnist Mike 26 Lions and Tigers and Bears 27 South Park’s Big Gay and others 28 Vardalos of Connie & Carla 29 The whole shebang 31 What you can do to your stuff 34 Like the walls of Paula Vogel’s university 36 PLO VIP 38 Caligula’s year 39 Nocturnal release 40 Post-lovemaking sighs 41 Madonna’s “To Have and ___ to Hold” 42 Be in the hole 46 Shakespeare’s Ariel, for one 47 Put the hot stuff to one’s pants 48 Gay interior designer on The Starter Wife 49 Frida’s wrap 50 Tex-Mex meat treat 53 Caligula playwright 55 Like the cheeks of one who streaks 58 ___ as Dick Button?

59 Samoan investigator Margaret 60 Gas brand in the land of k.d. lang 61 A Brit soldier may shoot it off 63 Snake sound Answers on p. 40

| issue 119 | January 8, 2009

Cryptogram

ALL “FAMILY” WELCOME

A cryptogram is a puzzle where one letter in the puzzle is substituted with another. For example: ECOLVGNCYXW YCR EQYIIRZNBZN YZU PSZ! Has the solution: CRYPTOGRAMS ARE CHALLENGING AND FUN! In the above example Es are all replaced by Cs. The puzzle is solved by recognizing letter patterns in words and successively substituting letters until the solution is reached. This week’s hint: C = Y Theme: A

Voted #1 Lesbian Club for 3 Years! Thanks!

quote from out columnist Deb Price.

UFOBJ BZGFZB GFO VAAVFZPYWZWOB UVF XWK SJGYKO. GYE VY XGBWS KGC WBBPOB, GLOFWSGYB GFO FOGEC.

_____ ______ ___ _____________ ___ ___ ______. ___ __ _____ ___ ______, _________ ___ _____.

Anagram An anagram is a word or phrase that can be made using the letters from another word or phrase.

Rearrange the letters below to answer:

This local gay film will be screened at this year’s Slamdance Film Festival.

AVOIDS VILL PEE _____ ________ PUZZLE SOLUTIONS ARE ON PAGE 40

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$1 Drafts, Country 8–10pm Sassy Kitty’s Karaoke 10pm

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Y O U R T H R I F T A L T E R N A T I V E . O R G J a nua r y 9, 20 0 9 | issue 119 | QSa lt L a k e | 39

Q Classifieds

HOMES FOR SALE Capitol hill/Marmalade

CALL 801-649-6663 TO PLACE YOUR AD TODAY

Real Estate QSaltLake Seeking Fun Office Neighbors

Sugar House Office Space Ava i l a b l e N ow

Marmalade Square Fantastic Remodel on these 1- and 2-bedroom units. New central air, hardwoods, tile, windows, fixtures, full appliance ­p ackage. Fully-fenced private backyards available. Enjoy the lifestyle this ­community offers. A block away from the newest gay bar in Salt Lake! Pool, spa & gym. Pets are welcome! Condo living on West Capitol Hill, Downtown for $149,900 to $159,900 – unheard of! HOA dues only $78/mo. Earn Instant Equity with one of our “preremodeled” units. Represented by your favorite real estate agent – Julie Silveous. Call Julie today at 5024507. Stop by to take a look at 244 West 6th North, Tues-Sat 12-4pm

339 Reed Avenue, Salt Lake City UT 84103, $237,000, 3 br 1 ba 1,090 sqft, Updated single-family home built in 1890. Newly refurbished. Less than a block from Salt Lake’s newest gay bar. John Armstrong, Ari Realty, 915-6595.

Glendale

Awesome remodeled 3 bed, 2 bath Glendale home Stainless Steel appliances, maple kitchen, bamboo floors and more. 1553 W. Indiana Ave MLS# 787787 $155,900, Kerry Sanford, Service First Realty, 801201-0665 or visit me online @ KerrySanford.com.

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Fun, liberal neighbors. Great energy,

3-Room office

Dennis, 359-6686 Puzzle Solutions Cryptogram: Fresh starts are opportunities for big change. And on basic gay issues, Americans are ready.

Anagram: Vapid Lovelies

Crossword

QDoku 5 8 1 9 6 7 4 2 3 8 5 1 7 3 2 6 9 4

2 4 9 5 3 8 1 7 6 9 4 2 6 1 8 7 3 5

6 3 7 1 2 4 9 8 5 6 7 3 9 5 4 1 8 2

7 9 5 6 8 3 2 1 4 3 9 5 8 4 7 2 1 6

4 1 3 2 5 9 7 6 8 2 1 7 3 6 9 5 4 8

8 2 6 4 7 1 3 5 9 4 6 8 1 2 5 9 7 3

5 2 9 4 7 3 8 6 1 7 2 3 9 5 4 7 1 6 8 3 2

7 3 6 2 8 1 4 5 9 6 8 1 3 7 2 8 4 5 6 9 1

1 8 4 5 9 6 3 2 7 9 5 4 1 6 8 3 9 2 5 4 7

5 7 2 4 3 8 6 9 1

9 4 3 1 7 6 2 8 5

6 1 8 5 9 2 7 4 3

3 4 2 5 9 1 7 8 6 3 1 5 4 2 9 8 3 1 7 6 5

5 9 1 7 6 8 2 3 4 8 6 9 5 1 7 6 4 9 3 8 2

6 7 8 2 4 3 1 9 5 2 4 7 8 3 6 5 7 2 1 4 9

6 4 3 1 5 7 2 9 8 4 5 3 6 1 2 8 7 9

7 9 8 4 2 6 5 3 1 9 8 7 4 3 5 6 2 1

2 5 1 3 9 8 6 7 4 1 2 6 8 7 9 5 4 3

3 6 4 9 1 5 8 2 7 2 3 9 1 8 6 4 5 7

9 7 5 2 8 3 4 1 6 7 1 5 3 2 4 9 6 8

1 8 2 7 6 4 9 5 3 8 6 4 9 5 7 3 1 2

4 0 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 119 | J a nua r y 8 , 20 09

Help Wanted

Fun Job! Now hiring 18-23 guys & girls to work + travel. Travel expenses paid in full, other expenses paid 1st month. We train! Call now!

1-866-857-9284.

All Kinds of jobs available.

Temp, temp to hire. Immediate need. All pay ranges. ­Contact Steve Whittaker 801‑463‑4828.

Cleaning Services

345 Reed Avenue, Salt Lake City UT 84103, $229,900, 2 br 1 ba 1,300 sqft, Single-Family Home.

Beautiful Victorian era detailiing in the contrasting brick arched headers above the windows. Less than a block from Salt Lake’s newest gay bar. Cathy Mooney Real Estate, 486-9200, ­c athymooney.com MLS ID: 818254

575 sq. ft., $455/mo

Murray room for rent. $400/ mo includes cable and utilities. I am a gay male in my 30s. Own bedroom, share bathroom and rest of place.

Must be clean and neat. 725 E. 6800 South. Contact Josh at 801-674-5420.

Male non-smoker to share 2 bdrm home in the Rose Park area.

Fenced yard, laundry rm. Looking for someone professional and clean.

Rent is $375.00 inc. utilities. Rental deposit included. Call Steven 801688-1918 or e-mail pmkirt234@yahoo.com If anyone would be interested in becoming a joint tenant with me, and share a house and house payment call 435-734-2391 for more information. Must be male, between age 21 and 25 yrs. Ask for Tom. Roommate wanted — $375 with utilities and internet. $300 deposit. 2 vacancies. Rose Park Fairpark area. Bedroon in house. Call Rob 801-688-4925.

214 Reed Avenue, Salt Lake City UT 84103, $179,900, 2 br 1 ba 804 sqft, Built in 1886. Less than a block from Salt Lake’s newest gay bar. Marie Ginman, 466-0678, Allpro Realty Group. MLS#: 825849

Sugarhouse. Desirable location.

2567 sq ft w/ finished basement. 3 bdrm 2 full bath, large backyard, freshly painted, ready to move in and make your own. 259,900. 2524 S. Dearborn, SLC. mls#726482. Contact Mary at 661-3175, Keller Williams South Valley Realtors.

for rent Condo For Rent. 2 bedroom, 2 bath, two car garage, fully remodeled, gas fireplace, jet top and walk-in closet, very quiet and private. South of Farmington, borders Centerville, 20 minutes to downtown SLC.Rent $1075/mo., $650 deposit. No smoking and no pets. 801540-2924 for info and appt.

South Salt Lake Duplexes. Refurbished and updated: 1 bdr $650/$350 dep., 2 bdr $750/$400 dep.

New kitchen cabinets, counter tops, dishwashers, tiled kitchen floors, newly tiled bathrooms, new carpets and paint. Utility rooms have washer/dryer hookups and storage. Off street and quiet. Close to four major bus routes. No smoking, no pets.

Background check req. 801-891-3567 or 801-891-3418.

FOR RENT ADS are just $10 per issue. Call 801-649-6663 to get yours in the next issue.

Roommates Holladay Room for rent. Room comes with comfy Queen Size bed.

Looking for mature professional that enjoys and respects a quiet and clean home. No Smoking, No Pets, have two very small dogs already, so must be dog friendly. This home is a gay household. Rent includes Utilities and wireless high-speed internet. Available now. $500/month.

Contact: Jake @ 801-414-7303

We clean houses, apartments, offices and more. One-time, weekly or monthly schedules. We’ll come to you for a free estimate and provide references. We use our own cleaning supplies. Great work ethic. Call Juanita or Manuel at 801‑759-9305.

PERSONALS

WHERE LOCAL GUYS MEET Browse & Respond FREE! 801-595-0005 Use Code 5705. Also Visit MegaMates.com, 18+

FOR SALE

1988 honda Accord. Two-door hatchback. Would be adequate for first-time buyer or someone who renovates older cars. Has had money recently put into it, but still needs minimal repairs. Good gas mileage. $800/obo. Call Steven at 801-604-2852.

MISC.

UtahGayDate.com has free chat, an interactive webzine, Dating Advice, and free profiles. Join ­utahgaydate.com.

Queer TV. Comcast not giving you what you need? Sign up for DirecTV through this gayowned and operated business.

UtahSat.com Entertainment Books — Get one meal when you buy another, free arts tickets and more. ­EntertainmentUtah.com TAKE A Friend to Lunch, Save 60%. $25 certificates to Salt Lake restaurants for just $10 or less.

Give as a gift or use for yourself.

SLRESTAURANT.COM $ 9 9 C RU I S E G r e a t d e a l s on last-minute cruises Miami-Bahamas 2 nights $99+ Miami-Bahamas 3 night $149+ Baja Mexico 3 night $269+ W Carribean 4 night $199+ (Example pricing.

Subject to a v a i l a b i l i t y. ) LastMinuteCruisePro.com

Qmmunity Guide BUSINESS/Professional

Aetna ANGLE, HuntR@Aetna.com. . . . . . . . . . . . 256-7137 Armed Forces Support Group . . . . . . . . . . . . . 581-7890 LGBTQ-Affirmative Psychotherapists Guild of Utah, www.lgbtqtherapists.com Pride at Work, Utah. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 531-6137 QUEST (Queer Utah Educators & Students Together) . .

809-5595 National Conference for Community and Justice, 359 W Pierpont Ave . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 359-5102 National Org. for Women. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 483-5188 Pride at Work, Utah. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 531-6137 Salt Lake County Gay Lesbian & Bisexual Employees, jdonchess@slco.org. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 273-6280 UTAH GAY AND LESBIAN CHAMBER OF COMMERCE, uglcc.org Utah Progressive Network. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 466-0955

EDUCATIONAL

Info & Referral Ctr . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 978-3333 informationandreferral.org UofU Women’s Resource Center sa.utah.edu/women. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 581-8030 UofU LGBT Resource Ctr. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 587-7973

HEALTH & HIV

City of Hope, Utah . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 531-6334 Gay Men’s Health Summit — Village utahgaymenshealth.com Northern Utah HIV/AIDS Project Walk-Ins Welcome. Every other Monday 5–7pm, 846 24th St, Ogden . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 393-4153 People with AIDS Coalition of Utah. . . . . . . . . 484-2205 SL Valley Health Dept. HIV/STD Clinic 610 S 200 E. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 534-4666 University of Utah Department of Family and Preventative Medicine, uuhsc.utah.edu/dfpm. . . . . 581-7234 Utah AIDS Foundation, utahaids.org . . . . . . . 487-2323

POLITICAL

American Civil Liberties Union, acluutah.org. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 521-9862 Disability Law Ctr. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . (800) 662-9080 info@disabilitylawcenter.org Equality Utah, equalityutah.org . . . . . . . . . . . 355-3479 Human Rights Campaign. . . . . . . . . . . . (202) 628-4160 Human Rights Campaign, Utah, hrcutah.org Log Cabin Republicans, Utah lcrutah.org, lcr@lcrutah.org Utah Stonewall Democrats utahstonewalldemocrats.org 455 S 300 E, Ste 102. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 328-1212

RELIGIOUS & SPIRITUAL

Affirmation — affirmation.org. . . . . . . . . . . . . 486-6977 Cache Valley Unitarian Universalists 596 E 900 N, Logan. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 435-755-2888 First Baptist Church of Salt Lake firstbaptist-slc.org, 777 S 1300 E. . . . . . . . 582-4921 First Unitarian Church, slcuu.org 569 S 1300 E . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 582-8687 Glory to God Community Church 375 Harrison Blvd, Ogden . . . . . . . . . . . . . 394-0204 Holladay United Church of Christ 2631 Murray-Holladay Rd. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 277-2631 Inner Light Center. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 268-1137 innerlightcenter.net Integrity/Utah — St. James Church. . . . . . . . . . 566-1311 Lifebreath Center/Interfaith. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 363-9229 Provo Comm. United Church of Christ 175 N University Ave. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 375-9115 Reconciliation (Gay Mormons) ldsreconciliation.org. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 296-4797 Restoration Church of Jesus Christ 2900 S State St. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 359-1151 Sacred Light of Christ Metropolitan Community Church, 823 S 600 E. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 595-0052

Salt Lake Center for Spiritual Living spirituallyfree.org 870 E North Union Ave. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 307-0481 South Valley Unitarian Univ. Society 6876 S Highland Drive. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 944-9723 Unitarian Universalist Church of Ogden 705 23rd St, Ogden. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 394-3338

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Affirmation — Salt Lake Chapter affirmation.org . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 486-6977 Best Friends Animal Sanctuary strutyourmutt.org . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 483-2000 Bisexual Community Forum. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 539-8800 Body Electric — Celebrating the Body Erotic thomasconnor1@hotmail.com. . . . . . . . . 699-7044 Camp Pinecliff . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 518-8733 Coloring Outside the Lines . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 957-4562 Gamofites, gamofites.org . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 444-3602 Gay and Lesbian Parents of Utah glpu@hotmail.com. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .467-9010 Imperial Rainbow Court of Northern Utah, irconu.org Kindly Gifts by Stitch & Bitch. . . . . . . . . . . . . . 487-7008 P-FLAG (Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays), pflagslc.org Polyamory Society . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 309-7240 1st Tue 7-9:30pm at the Center qVinum gay & lesbian wine group www.qvinum.com Retired & Senior Volunteer Pro.. . . . . . . . . . . . 779-1287 Royal Court of the Golden Spike Empire, rcgse.org Southern Utah GLBT Community Center suglbtcc@yahoo.com. . . . . . . . . . . . . (435) 313-GLBT groups.yahoo.com/groups/suglbtcc Village Summit, utahgaymenshealth.com STRENGTH IN NUMBERS (SIN) SALT LAKE groups.yahoo.com/group/SINSaltLake sWerve, swerveutah.com U of U Women’s Resource Ctr . . . . . . . . . . . . . 581-8030 sa.utah.edu/women U of U LGBT Resource Ctr. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 587-7973 UTAH BEAR ALLIANCE utahbears.com. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 949-3989 Utah Families Coalition, utahfamilies.org. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 539-8800 Ext 23 admin@utahfamilies.org Utah Gay Pride, utahpride.org . . . . . . . . . . . . 539-8800 Utah Male Naturists, www.umen.org Utah Power Exchange . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 975-0346 utahpowerexchange.org Membership@UtahPowerExchange.org UTAH PRIDE CENTER utahpridecenter.org, 361 N 300 W . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 539-8800 Toll-free. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 888-874-2743 Utah Queer Events groups.yahoo.com/group/UtahQueerEvents Western Transsexual Support Grp . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . (435) 882-8136

SPORTS

Lambda Hiking Club, gayhike.org. . . . . . . . . . 532-8447 Mountain West Flag Football League mwffl.org . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .359-2544 Mountain West Volleyball League slcgaa.org . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 407-6183 QUAC – QUEER UTAH AQUATIC CLUB quacquac.org . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 671-3367 Salt Lake City Gay Athletic Association, slcgaa.org Salt Lake Goodtime Bowling Lge. . . . . . . . . . . 832-9745 Stonewall Shooting Sports of Utah stonewallshootingsportsutah.org Utah Gay and Lesbian Ski Week communityvisions.org . . . . . . . . . . . . 877-429-6368 Utah Gay Mountain Bike Riders sports.groups.yahoo.com/group/utahgaymtnbike Delta Lambda Sappho Union Weber State Univ.. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 627-1639

J a nua r y 9, 20 0 9 | issue 119 | QSa lt L a k e | 4 1

Support the Businesses that Support You

Q Tales The Perils of Petunia Pap-Smear The Tale of “The Road Less Traveled”

by Petunia Pap-Smear

T

Logan is fraught with danger and excitement.

It’s 2:00 a.m. and my friend Wayne and I just got home from Salt Lake City while driving through a blizzard, not the Dairy Queen tasty, slushy drink kind of Blizzard, but the blinding, snowy, you could crash your car into the ditch, get frostbite and die at any moment kind of blizzard. The only satisfactory reason for any “respectable” (and I use this term very loosely) Queen to be out this late, in conditions like this would be that she had better than average chance of “bagging a stud” ala Senator Larry Craig’s wide stance and snappy toe tapping style in the far right stall at the Brigham City rest area. Who knows, being that close to Idaho, I might meet Senator Craig himself and he could teach me a few new pick-up lines.

This particular drive home was truly a “white knuckle event.” Trying to maintain a positive attitude in this situation, I kept thinking to myself, the cold will make my cheeks all rosy red naturally and I will be able to save so much money on rouge.

The sign said Sardine Canyon was closed because of the storm. I wonder if that really was the case or if the road crew’s poker game went a little overtime? Either way we had to go on the proverbial “Road Less Traveled,” the long way through Tremonton, land of big belt buckles and even bigger hair. I believe they filmed the movie Hairspray in Tremonton, because they were able to film the residents just as they are, and did not have to recreate the big hair styles from historical photos. What a cost savings! In fact the fire danger sign leading into Tremonton always reads “Extreme” due to the flammability of all the hairspray. Now Tremonton is a fine little town in it’s own right, but hardly a “destination event” for the he snowy road to

well traveled Queen. It’s a place you try to pass through as quickly as possible on the way to anywhere else.

Much like all of Utah County!!

As we continued to drive ever so slowly along the increasingly snow packed and drifting roads north of Brigham City and signs of civilization began to disappear into the “Dark And Stormy Night,” I was grateful that I had read Call Of The Wild as a teenager, and thus I felt prepared to act as Nanook of the North should we encounter a hungry pack of wolves venturing south from Yellowstone, or even more frightening yet, a Mangy Moose in heat, along the pass into Cache Valley.

God bless the person that invented those reflector posts they put on both sides of the road. Since all Queens are attracted to shiny objects, these came in very handy. Were it not for them, I’m sure that we would be off in a ditch along the way. As it happened, there was a whole lot of guessing as to where the road was, so I just pointed the Buick to the middle of the reflectors and hoped there was pavement underneath us. Come to think of it, driving in snow can be compared to having sex. Precise depth perception and a sense of distance are critical. All of that practice of judging the “real and accurate length of six inches” comes in very handy on occasions like this.

And instead of repeatedly asking that time honored phrase “Is it in yet?”, I repeatedly kept asking “Are we still on the road?” Truth be told though, I think I can make a convincing case that everything can and should be compared to having sex.

The very worst part of the whole trip home was that we had to drive so slow and it took so long that I really, really, really had to pee. Of course drinking that big mug of Mountain Dew to stay awake didn’t help in this regard. My teeth were literally floating. A queen can only squirm around

42 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 119 | J a nua r y 8 , 20 09

in her seat so much trying to hold it all in before other people in the car begin to think you are having a “very special moment” all to yourself. I would have stopped along the road to create a little Yellow Snow but stopping the forward momentum of the Buick could have been terminal, not to forget the possible interference of a frisky moose in heat.

It is fortunate that we did not run off the road, as I would have been forced to eat Wayne (and not in the good way!) since I did not get any dinner that evening and I was very hungry. Wayne always smells so good that I’m sure he would be a very tasty “Donner Party” style entree.

I wonder what cologne he wears?

I’m sure it’s something very stylish but in that moment and in those treacherous conditions, I could have mistaken it for “Ode de-Pot Roast.”

Now finally we have arrived home, safe but not sound, and it’s time for bed, sadly alone (where is that damned moose?) and sweet dreams of “Yellow Snow.”

As always, this story leaves us with many important questions: 1. How long does it take white knuckles to turn back to pink?

2. What shade of Lip-stick will match the Rosy Red cold cheeks?

3. How do you get fingernail imprints out of the steering wheel?

4. Do you think those road reflectors could be made into a stylish set of earrings?

5. If I did in fact eat Wayne, what should I have told his parents?

6. Is anyone really honest about the real length of six inches?

7. Would sex with a horny moose hurt very much?

8. Would my babies have antlers?

9. Where are the effects of global warming when you need them?

These and other important questions to be answered in future chapters of: “The Perils of Petunia Pap-Smear.”

These businesses brought you this issue of QSaltLake.

Make sure to thank them with your patronage.

A New Day Spa. . . . . . . . . 272-3900 Area 51. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 534-0819 Beehive Bail Bonds. . . . . 328-3329 The Beer Nut . . . . . . . . . . . 531-8182 Bliss Nightlife. . . . . . . . . . 860-1083 Blue Boutique . . . . . . . . . 485-2072 Cafe Med . . . . . . . . . . . . . 493-0100 Cahoots . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 538-0606 Club Manhattan. . . . . . . . 364-7651 Club Try-Angles. . . . . . . . 364-3203 Diamond Airport Parking.347-4255 The Dog Show. . . . . . . . . 466-6100 Gossip!. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 328-0255 Healing Hands. . . . . . . . . 654-0175 Jam . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . jamslc.com Kathy Elton Consulting. . 230-8437 KRCL-FM. . . . . . . . . . . . . . 363-1818 LastMinuteCruisePro.com Michael Picardi . . . . . mpicardi.net MegaPhone. 595-0005, code 4621 Mestizo Coffeehouse . . . 596-0500 Meditrina. . . . . . . . . . . . . 485-2055 O-Town Derby Dames . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .derbydames.net Paper Moon. . . . . . . . . . . 713-0678 Pride Counseling. . . . . . . 595-0666 Pride Massage. . . . . . . . . 486-5500 Teleperformance. . . . . . . 257-5990 TheQPages. . . . . . . . . . . . 649-6663 Red Iguana. . . . . . . . . . . . 322-1489 Rivendell Media — FOCUS Features Sage’s Cafe. . . . . . . . . . . 322-3790 Salt Lake Men’s Choir. . . . 581-7100 Salt Lake Pizza & Pasta. 484-1804 Salt Lake Valley Health. . 534-4666 Sam Weller’s Books . . . . 328-2586 Julie Silveous Realtor. . . . 502-4507 Square Peg Concerts. . . . . . . . . . . . squarepegconcerts.com Sundance Film Festival. . . festival. sundance.org The Diamond Lab . . . . . . 891-0344 The Tavernacle. . . . . . . . . 519-8900 The Trapp Door . . . . . . . . 533-0173 Tin Angel Cafe. . . . . . . . . 328-4155 Utah Pride Center . . . . . . 539-8800 Village Christmas Shoppe.569-0320 W Lounge. myspace.com/wlounge We Train You Obtain.877-968-6282 West Wendover . . . . . . . . . . westwendovercity.com Jeff Williams Taxi. . . . . . . 971-6287 Dr. Douglas Woseth. . . . . 266-8841

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