QSaltLake Magazine - May 2016

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UTAH’S GAY, LESBIAN, BISEXUAL, TRANSGENDER AND ALLY

May 2016 Issue 255

The Go-Gos’ Belinda Carlisle to headline Pride

SNEAK PEEK AT UTAH PRIDE 2016 FABBY AWARD WINNERS • SUICIDE SURVIVORS GROUP • Q&A WITH TITUSS BURGESS

It’s amazing what a little LOVE can do…

4 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | THE FIRST WORD

gaysaltlake.com | issue 255 | may 2016

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gaysaltlake.com | issue 255 | may 2016

in this issue

staffbox publisher/editor Michael Aaron

copy editor Tony Hobday designer Christian Allred sales Craig Ogan, Steven Simmons

20 39 Utah Pride Festival Sneak Peek Headliners, what’s new this year, other entertainers

44

Out Youth Artists Tituss Burgess UMOCA youth project teaches art and life

NEWS ���������������������������������������������������������������������9 Utah Pride Center starts Suicide Survivor group Qmmunity news briefs

on sappy songs, bisexuality and his proudest moments

A&E �������������������������������������������������������������������������38 Tony Hobday’s Gay Agenda Music and book reviews

FOOD & DRINK �������������������������������������������43 Dining Guide

VIEWS �����������������������������������������������������������������16 A call for a new Community Council Creep of the month: Tom Casperson Christopher Katis has great kids

NIGHTLIFE �������������������������������������������������������57 Social Media is turning you to a sex addict Qmmunity Calendar of nightlife events Comics and Puzzles

from the publisher Happy birthday to Q, Happy birthday to Q

BY MICHAEL AARON

Twelve

years ago on April 29, the first issue of QSaltLake magazine started being delivered to bars, restaurants, coffee shops and other sordid locations. There was a party-of-all-parties in two of Hotel Monaco’s presidential suites, attended by much of the KUTV personalities, the mayor, several legislators and a bunch of cute guys I probably haven’t seen since. There was, after all, free alcohol.

We were on KCPW helping with their radiothon and talking about the new mag. We had a two and a half minute segment on KUTV’s morning news with Mary Nichols (who was awesome, bytheway).

This year, I will be on stage with the Salt Lake Men’s Choir on April 29, even doing a solo (Razzle Dazzle was written for me, so I must be the one to perform it.) I’d have it no other way.

It’s no secret that it’s been a roller coaster ride

for the magazine. It is for almost all print media.

But I say the fact we are still here show that we’re doing something right. When you find out what that is, could you tell me?

I’m once again very hopeful for the year. I hesitate to put that here in ink, as I said the same thing last Fall and things did just that — fell.

But something about Spring makes it all seem more possible. It’s about renewal and hope for a few seasons of Utah’s great outdoors.

I sure hope so, because there are no more dark hairs to go gray, and the hair on my head is getting close to the point of being able to be counted.

So if I roll my eyes and start to weep when you say, “Here’s to another 12 years,” please forgive me. While they have been the best of times, they have also been some of the most difficult of times.

And I’d have it no other way. Q

contributors Diane AndersonMinshall, Chris Azzopardi, Paul Berge, Jeff Berry, Dave Brousseau, Tyson Daley, Jack Fertig, Greg Fox, Charles Lynn Frost, Oriol Gutierrez Jr., Tony Hobday, Christopher Katis, Princess Kennedy, Rock Magen, Sam Mills, Mikey Rox, Gregg Shapiro, Petunia Pap Smear, Steven Petrow, Ed Sikov, Peter Stoker, Marcy Taylor-Rizzi, Ben ­Williams, D’Anne ­Witkowski distribution Jason Van Campen,

Bradley Jay Crookston, Tad Wada publisher

Salt Lick Publishing LLC 222 S Main St, Ste 500 Salt Lake City, Utah 84101 tel: 801-649-6663 Contact emails: general: info@qsaltlake.com editorial: editor@qsaltlake.com sales: sales@qsaltlake.com

Check us out online at:

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QSaltLake Magazine is a trademark of Salt Lick Publishing, LLC. Copyright © 2015, Salt Lick Publishing, LLC. All rights reserved. No material may be reprinted or reproduced without written permission from the publisher. 10,000 copies of QSaltLake Magazine are distributed free of charge at over 300 locations across the Wasatch Front. Free copies are limited to one per person. For additional copies, call 801-649-6663. It is a crime to destroy or dispose of current issues or otherwise interfere with the distribution of this magazine.

Publication of the name or photograph of any individual or organization in articles or advertising in QSaltLake Magazine is not to be construed as any indication of the person’s sexual orientation or gender identity. Printed in the USA on recycled paper. Please recycle this copy when you are through with it.

NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 9

may 2016 | issue 255 | gaysaltlake.com

news The top things you should know happened last month (Full stories at gaysaltlake.com.)

Southern hospitality, or not Four Southern states took action on LGBTQ rights. One did the right thing, one put it on hold, and two pulled the welcome mat out from underneath the community.

GEORGIA: Georgia Gov. Nathan Deal vetoed a “religious liberty” bill saying the legislation didn’t match the “character of our State and the character of its people.” He also said he saw no examples of religious liberty problems in the state.

Business groups, including Salesforce, Disney, Unilever and Intel, as well as tech companies such as Apple, Microsoft, Twitter and Dell opposed the measure.

TENNESSEE’S anti-transgender “bathroom bill” went down the drain — again — and it will apparently stay there for at least a year.

In March, a legislative committee had delayed action on the bill by sending it to a summer study session, but the committee, under pressure from the far-right Family Action Council of Tennessee, revived it in early April. House Sponsor Susan Lynn said she would withdraw the bill until next year.

The measure, House Bill 2414, and its companion legislation, Senate Bill 2387, would have barred transgender students in public elementary and

secondary schools, colleges, and universities from using the restrooms, locker rooms, and other sex-segregated facilities that correspond with their gender identity.

“I have learned that our school districts are largely following what the bill says,” Lynn told The Tennessean. “I am still absolutely 100 percent in support of maintaining the privacy of all students. But I’m going to roll the bill over until next year so we can work on those issues.”

NORTH CAROLINA: North Carolina effectively legalized discrimination against LGBTQ people with a law signed by Governor Pat McCrory.

The law prevents cities from passing anti-LGBT discrimination ordinances and requires schools to designate single-sex bathrooms based on “biological sex.”

PayPal, Dow Chemical, the NBA, Google, American Airlines and other businesses oppose the law.

The NCAA, which had planned to host at least 20 high-profile games in the state in 2017 and 2018, opposes the law. “We’ll continue to monitor current events, which include issues surrounding diversity, in all cities bidding on NCAA championships and events, as well as cities that have already been named as future host sites.”

Facebook, which has a data center in the state, said it was “disappointed” by the law. “We believe in ensuring the rights of LGBT individuals and oppose efforts that discriminate against people on the basis of their gender identity or sexual orientation,” a company spokesperson said.

Rock idol, Bruce Springsteen canceled an appearance in the state, as have Pearl Jam, Ani DeFranco and Ringo Starr.

One leader who voted for the bill has had a change of heart.

Rep. Billy Richardson has filed a

bill to repeal the law.

MISSISSIPPI: Governor Phil Bryant signed a bill which offers protection for Christians who adhere to traditional views of marriage and gender roles. Governor Bryant said the law “protects sincerely held religious beliefs and moral convictions.” The law allows some private businesses and religious groups to refuse service to LGBTQ people.

Bryan Adams has cancelled a concert in Mississippi over the religious liberty law, saying he could not “in good conscience” perform in the state.

March Madness has its gay on Derrick Gordon, 24, made history as the only out player to ever compete in the NCAA tournament.

At a press conference before the game the Seton Hall University player told reporters that he longs for a day when his sexual orientation won’t make news.

“It’s always going to be a story until somebody else does it,” Gordon told reporters. He said he didn’t mind being the only out player: “I just hope one day when somebody else comes out that it’s not as big of a deal. “ Gordon came out last year while playing for the University of Massachusetts at Amherst. He had support from his coach and fans who staged a counter-protest when members of the Westboro Baptist Church decided to picket at one of his games.

Vatican boots Kim Davis supporter The Vatican replaced the ambassador to the United States, who arranged the meeting between Pope Francis and antigay Kentucky county clerk Kim Davis. Archbishop Carlo Maria Viganò will leave the position of apostolic nuncio, the

equivalent of an ambassador.

During the pope’s visit to the United States last year, Viganò arranged for the Pope to meet with Davis, infamous for shutting down all marriage licenses to same-sex couples after the Supreme Court’s marriage equality ruling.

Vatican officials also said the Pope’s only private meeting during his stay in America was with a former student from his time in Argentina. That student is a partnered gay man who now lives in Washington.

Catholic News Service editor Tony Spence fired for pro-LGBT tweets The top editor at Catholic News Service was forced to resign, reportedly because of pro-LGBT positions he had taken on Twitter.

Tony Spence, who had been editor in chief at the news service since 2004, was asked to resign, according to the National Catholic Reporter. The Washington D.C. based news service is run by the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops.

At last, underwear advertising for the ‘Dad Bod’ The “Dad Bod” craze has arrived in fashion magazines advertising men’s underwear.

American Eagle has launched a men’s underwear line called Aerie for the “Dad Bod.” See a layout at ­bit.ly/ dadundies The company unveiled the new line with an ad campaign that celebrates bodies of all types. Aerie, which also makes underwear for women, has become known for not using retouched photos in its ads.

The tagline for the promotion of Aerie men is a reaffirming one: “The real you is sexy.”

A huge sigh of relief was heard as men ceased holding in their bellies at the gym, bars and pool parties.

14 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

gaysaltlake.com | issue 255 | may 2016

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NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 15

may 2016 | issue 255 | gaysaltlake.com

Utah Pride Center starts Survivors of Suicide support group Utah ranks 4th highest in suicides in the United States. In the first months of 2016, over 150 Utahns took their own lives. Like most suicide statistics, it is difficult to identify the specific demographics of the persons committing suicide, let alone the reasons for it. In the wake of a new policy handed down by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, some groups have identified those that committed suicide as Mormon, LGBTQ youth. The policy declares gay Mormons in same-sex marriages to be apostates at risk of excommunication and children of same-sex couples unable to be blessed or baptized until they turned 18 — and even then, only if they renounced their parents’ marriage.

Prior to the announcement of the LDS church, the Utah Pride Center had recognized the need for support regarding suicide among the LGBT+ population.

“In planning programs at the Utah Pride Center, we strive to prevent and address suicide in the LGBTQIA+ community by working to reduce risk factors and increase resiliency in the people we serve,” said Rachel Peterson, director of programs at the Utah Pride Center.

In the last few months, there has been increased public concern regarding suicide rates of members of the community.

Rachel commented, “we are glad to have the support of other organizations in the community who are also committed to preventing and addressing the suicide epidemic among LGBTQIA+ people.”

Knowing that there are numerous factors that lead to suicide, and that queer youth are four times more likely to attempt or commit suicide, UPC began to research ways to provide a resource for those in need of support. Key staff attended a training at the Didi Hirsch Suicide Prevention Center in California. They then developed the first and only suicide prevention program in the nation that is specific to the needs of the LGBT+ community. The program, Survivors of Suicide Attempts (SOSA), will offer suicide survivors and those contemplating suicide a safe, welcoming and non-judgmental place to share their common experiences.

As a support group, they will meet

weekly for eight sessions, covering topics of giving and receiving support, coping with thoughts of suicide, accessing resources, and creating hope.

“Knowing that those who have attempted suicide before are more likely to have another attempt, this group will be a powerful contribution to our efforts in preventing suicide in our community,” said Peterson.

The group will be led by Peterson, UPC Clinical Director Joshua Bravo, a licensed clinical social worker, and clinical social work intern Jillian Hill.

“I am encouraged by the positive response we have received about offering this group,” Hill said. “People are already experiencing relief and hope to know that a group for survivors of suicide attempts exists and that they can be a part of it.”

People attempt suicide for complex and personal reasons. For some in the LGBT+ community, rejection from family and loss of close personal relationships can lead to a suicide attempt. One potential group participant shared that “my parent told me they prayed, and God said I should kill myself rather than be gay.”

“This new program is part of the outcome of closely reviewing our mission and the needs of our LGBTQ+ community,” said UPC executive director Carol Gnade.

“We are proud to have such a professional staff to see SOSA come to a reality at the Utah Pride Center and sincerely believe that we can do what the center does best — save lives.”

SOSA is a part of the Community Counseling Center which serves hundreds of people each week in counseling, psychotherapy, and support groups It assists individuals in meeting their emotional, psychological, and mental health needs and also helps parents of suicidal LGBT+ youth and addresses a variety of concerns such as generalized anxiety, social phobia, eating disorders, relationship and marriage quality, homelessness, depression, gender identity, and coming out. The program also serves court-mandated domestic violence, and substance abuse cases. Q For more information or to join the group, contact Jillian Hill at the Utah Pride Center: sosa@utahpridecenter.org , 385-831- 0872

Suicide Warning Signs: • Threatening, talking about or planning suicide • Giving away possessions • Feeling hopeless/helpless • Depression/irritability • Increased drug/alcohol use • Making out wills • Despairing texts or social media posts • Feelings of failure, guilt, or shame • Social withdrawal or isolation • Risky behaviors • Previous attempts to self-harm

What to do: • • • • • • • •

Express concern Listen without criticism Take threats seriously Ask about suicide plan Remove lethal means Inform family/friends Seek professional help Call 911 or the Crisis Line

Where to seek help: All Utah Counties, 24 Hours: National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (800) 273-TALK (8255) Mobile Crisis Outreach Team — Salt Lake County 801-587-3000 Survivors of Suicide Attempts support group: sosa@utahpridecenter.org Men Support Group: Sean@utahpridecenter.org Man Therapy: mantherapy.org Suicide Prevention Courses: qprinstitute.com National Alliance on Mental Illness Utah: namiut.org / 801-323-9900 / 877-230-6264 Utah Suicide & Crisis Hotline suicide.org/hotlines/utah-suicide-hotlines.html Ogden: Weber Mental Health Serving Davis, Morgan, & Weber Counties Crisis/Suicide Prevention Hotline 801-625-3700 Orem: Crisis Line of Utah County 801-226-4433 Provo: Wasatch Mental Health Crisis Line 801-373-7393 Salt Lake City: Valley Mental Health Serving Salt Lake, Summit, Tooele Counties 801-261-1442 Permission to Grieve: For Survivors of a Loved One’s Suicide health.utah.gov/vipp/pdf/Suicide/grievebooklet_final0605.pdf

16 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

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9th South in Salt Lake is now Harvey Milk Blvd The Salt Lake City Council unanimously voted to make Ninth South, from Ninth West to 11th East, Harvey Milk Boulevard, at least honorarily. The stretch of road encompasses the 9th & 9th business district, which has revitalized in the 80s by gayowned businesses including Cahoots Cards & Gifts, Twigs Flower Shop and The Coffee Garden, as well as the up-and-coming Central Ninth district, which is also attracting lesbian, gay and bisexual entrepreneurs. The new VOA Homeless Youth Resource Center, Club Try-Angles and Off-Trax also call the new Harvey Milk Boulevard home.

The resolution was forwarded to the council by openly gay Salt Lake City Councilman Stan Penfold.

“For me, the tradition of honoring civil rights leaders like Martin Luther King, Rosa Parks and Cesar Chavez suggests to anyone invited to our city that all are welcome here,” Penfold said during the council meeting. “They will have an expectation that our community is striving to be inclusive and welcoming to all.”

Penfold noted that the city would incur no cost, as Equality Utah has agreed to do a fundraising campaign through ­GoFundMe to pay for new signs.

Noting that two city councilmen and the mayor are gay or lesbian, EU Executive Director Troy Williams testified at the council hearing that “you are living Harvey Milk’s vision for all of us.”

“This will be a beacon of hope for LGBTQ youth and other marginalized teens that they, too, can change the world,” Williams said.

EU board chair Marina Goldberg said that, when she was growing up, she wasn’t sure that she belonged in the world.

“Harvey Milk’s message of hope has insprired people to come out and love who we

are and to appreciate the beauty of having a different sexuality, of being a different human being,” she said. “He saved my life.”

She noted that the cost of having kids not know that they are loved is greater than the cost of printing signs.

She also announced that she will name their unborn child Harvey.

Not everyone spoke in favor of the naming, but a large percentage did. Most wondered about the road being named after

ARTISTIC RENDERING BY QSALTLAKE

a national figure, rather than a local one.

Others questioned 9th South as being the road to be renames.

“Perhaps the road going to the new prison would be great to name Harvey Milk Boulevard,” quipped Ralph Pahnke.

Attorney Christopher Wharton said that he lived on 9th South for a number of years, as he was coming out.

“Salt Lake City has a tradition of honoring civil rights leaders who are from all over the country, and the world,” he said. “It is very fitting to add Harvey Milk to that tradition.”

Michelle Turpin said Harvey Milk inspired her to persevere as a gay activist.

“I first became a gay activist when ACLU made a gay task force and I ended up on front page. I received death threats,: she said. “Harvey Milk’s memory inspired me to keep going ... Harvey to me is the Martin Luther King of the LGBT community.” Q Equality Utah’s GoFundMe page will be at equalityutah.org.

may 2016 | issue 255 | gaysaltlake.com

NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 17

Restore Our Humanity turns its attention to alleged sex abuse in the LDS Church The group that sued the state of Utah over Amendment 3 and other laws on the books that limited marriage to opposite sex couples is now taking aim at child sex abuse within the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

Mark Lawrence, director of Restore Our Humanity, was outspoken during the time the World Congress of Families came to Salt Lake City last Fall. He called the organization and its member organizations hate groups.

He notes that the LDS Church quietly released their new guidelines in how to deal with same-sex couples who marry, as well as their children’s membership in the church within hours of the Congress pulling up stakes and leaving town.

Restore, also, has been trying to be recognized as a sponsoring organization to host a Boy Scouts of America troop. They never received an answer from the scouts either nationally or locally.

The underlying lie that keeps the group from being approved, Lawrence says, is that BSA leaders and members believe gay people will molest the young scouts.

“These people are perpetuating this mythology that gay people are after their kids,” Lawrence said, “and of course we’re not.”

This got him researching, wanting to show that the sex abuse within the scouting is perpetrated by “good, upstanding married heterosexual men who are leaders in their church.”

As he started digging in, he says, he found the problem is on a much larger scale than he realized. The more he dug, the more survivors of sexual abuse

he found.

“I found that there is systemic, ritualistic, intergenerational sex abuse occurring in the LDS Church,” he said. “It’s staggering. It doesn’t just happen in isolated homes, it happens in entire communities.”

“I am convinced this has been going on since the inception of the church,” he continued. “[LDS Church founder] Joseph Smith was a con man and a sexual predator, and he brought this into the organization.”

Lawrence believes that sex abuse became part of the culture of the church under Smith’s leadership, and it continues today.

Restore is now seeking survivors of sexual abuse within the LDS Church to get their stories.

They are particularly interested in cases where the victim reported the assaults and they were covered up and hidden.

“We are starting to find that there is a huge number of people who fall in this category and are starting to talk now,” he said.

He wants to create a safe space for the survivors, who he says are now isolated, being ostracized, and being blamed for the problem.

Restore will then interview them, recording their stories and will make the allegations public.

They will then bring in attorneys and victims rights groups to help the survivors understand what they can do about the situation. Lawrence hopes there will eventually be a class action lawsuit against the church. He’s careful to note, however, that they are far from that point.

Ultimately, he simply wants the victimization stop. Q More info at restoreourhumanity.org

165 S Main Street, Suite 200 Salt Lake City, Utah 84111

18 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

Q

mmunity

Alternative Garden Club celebrates spring The Alternative Garden Club celebrated the first day of Spring by planting a street tree near downtown Salt Lake City as its service project for 2016. The club’s outreach theme for this year is the planting and care of urban trees. It would like to remind everyone that trees provide many benefits to our cities, including shade, beauty and cooling; they also need proper care, including watering during hot or dry spells.

Millcreek Gardens donated a tall, beautiful tulip tree for this project.

Thom Sawyer of Millcreek Gardens will be the speaker at the club’s next meeting.

He will present some new, attractive varieties of trees, shrubs and flowers that are available for planting this year.

The Alternative Garden Club is a friendly society for LGBT persons and their straight allies who are interested in learning more about gardening and the natural environment. It meets the first Wednesday of each month. Annual membership is $20, but newcomers are always free to come check out the club and meet the group. For more information, contact altgardenclub@gmail.com or go to their Facebook page.

WHEN: Wed. May 4, 7:30pm WHERE: Sugar House Garden Center, 1602 E 2100 South INFO: bit.ly/altgarden, altgardenclub@gmail.com

41st RCGSE Coronation The end of the 40th reign of the Royal Court of the Golden Spike Empire and the handing over to the 41st will happen this Memorial Day weekend. Full schedule: Thursday 5/26: In-town Show/Awards, Sun Trapp Friday, 5/27: PR Ball, Doors 6pm, Show 7pm, Red Lion Wasatch Room Saturday, 5/28: Hospitality Suite, 11a to 3p, Red Lion Wasatch Room Tea Party 6-7pm, Red Lion Wasatch Room Out of Town Show, 8pm, Red Lion Wasatch Rm Sunday, 5/29: Hospitality Suite, 11a to 3p, Red Lion Wasatch Room Coronation, Doors 5pm, Show 6pm, Red

gaysaltlake.com | issue 255 | may 2016

Lion Wasatch Room Monday, 5/30: Victory Brunch, Noon, Sun Trapp WHEN: May 26 – May 30 WHERE: Red Lion Hotel Salt Lake Downtown, 161 W. 600 S INFO: rcgse.org

Team Try-Angles to raise funds for MS at Best Dam Bike Ride Team Try-Angles is the only official LGBTand-Friends team for the Bike MS cycling event held at the end of June in Logan, Utah. All money raised goes to the Utah chapter of the Multiple Sclerosis Foundation to fund programs for those living with MS, and research to find a cure.

This event has something for everyone, whether you’re just learning or are a veteran rider. On mostly flat terrain, tons of rest stops and different route/mileage options, this ride is about having fun. If you’re bi(cycle)-curious, we can help you get started with everything from tips on the proper gear to training rides.

WHEN: June 25-26, 2016 WHERE: Cache County Fairgrounds, Logan REGISTRATION FEE: $50* (discount codes frequently available. Contact team) Fundraising Minimum: $250* REGISTER: bit.ly/tta2016 INFO: teamtryangles@gmail.com

Third Friday Bingo at First Baptist The Matrons of Mayhem return to First Baptist Church for Third Friday Bingo. Come early to get a good seat. This month’s charity is The Legacy Initiative of Utah, whose mission is to fight hunger, provide humanitarian aid, and educate people through community partnerships not just for today, but for our future.

WHEN: Fri. May 20, 7pm WHERE: First Baptist Church, 777 S 1300 E COST: $5 first card, $3/addl INFO: facebook.com/matronsofmayhem

Q Kickball League schedule Games are underway for the Q Kickball Leagure and spectators are more than welcome. Games are played starting at 10am and the last game starting at 1pm on the west field at Sunnyside Park, 1650 East Sunnyside Avenue (860 South).

April 24th, May 1st, May 15th, May 22nd For more information follow the league by going to www.qkickball.com

blackBOARD BDSM classes blackBOARD is a learning program for men interested in BDSM play.

“By teaching men to become more comfortable using their words when it comes to sex, we experience the open conversations that make sex and kink play safer both psychologically and physically,” said founder Michael Sanders.

The blackBOARD program produced PrEP Talk last year, which lead directly to a huge increase in men going on a PrEP regimen, an increase large enough for the drug company Gilead to reach out to expand that program with grant funding.

“Our parties and CODE nights are fun, but the educational program is the tool to make those events even more fun, as well as a safer place to meet and play,” Sanders said.

For information, message the group on their closed Facebook group page, f­ acebook.com/groups/blackBOOTS/

Group says ‘GetOUTside’ It’s warming up in Utah and the members of Get OUTside that couldn’t be happier.

Get OUTside plans two or three events each month, rain, shine, snow or cold.

Organized a year ago by Jeffrey Wood and Ryan Derrick, the group now has 500 friends on Facebook.

“When we first had the idea of starting a group, we wanted to create a forum where outdoor loving people could find others to share in outdoor adventures,” said Derrick.

He says everyone is welcome to join the group and participate in events. “We encourage members to plan events and share them with the group, encouraging new friends to participate in an outdoor adventure.”

The group plans hikes, kayak trips, campouts, and anything else people are interested in hosting in Utah’s great outdoors.

Membership is free. Go to bit.ly/GetOutsideUtah and request to be added to the group.

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presented by

l a v i t fes 2016

Mama Dragon Story Project to host launch party as book publishes A message of unconditional love is the cause the Mama Dragons fight for. They seek to protect and defend their LGBT+ children against the rejection and that exists within religious congregations and society. They also hope to bring empathy and understanding for the unique challenges their children face.

The Mama Dragons are predominantly Mormon or have a Mormon background, but the group does not limit itself to members of a particular faith; all are welcome, including those who have abandoned organized religion altogether.

They aim to educate and share.

Fine art photographer, Kimberly Anderson, has created portraits of these women on 5x7 Tri-X and making AZO contact prints. She uses an old portrait lens from 1907 and finishes the prints in her own darkroom. Her intent is to photograph these women without the slickness of digital technology. She accepts them as they are when they come to the camera, just as they have an unconditional love for their kids. The ‘average-ness’ of this group of women serves to underscore just how widespread these struggling children are.

Images are displayed with essays written by the mothers themselves. Their words bring

to light some very real issues they face when their children finally come out to them.

Confronted by the knowledge that their children identify with something outside of cultural and religious norms, these women now must make a choice. For some it is easy, for others tragically difficult.

Many of their stories are filled with heartbreak and sadness, while others are overflowing with love for their children as well as reconciliation with God. All express the unconditional acceptance and love of a true mother’s heart.

The portraits themselves serve as a conduit to help the viewer want to learn more about each woman’s journey. When the narrative is combined with the visage of the mother, words become people, hearts can be touched, attitudes can be changed and lives can be saved.

Anderson has photographed nearly 70 Mama Dragons covering six western states since January 2015.

An event on Wednesday, May 8 will take place at Club at 50 West, 50 W Broadway, from 7 to 9 p.m. hosted by John Dehlin and Mormon Stories.

Several Mama Dragons in the book will read their stories. Q Books available at bit.ly/mamadragonstory

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20 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

gaysaltlake.com | issue 255 | may 2016

Utah Pride announces headliners, changes The Utah Pride Festival is set to take place Friday, June 3 through Sunday June 5 at Washington and Library Squares. Organizers have been working furiously to make sure it goes off without a hitch, including attracting a large number of sponsors to help pay all the bills.

THEME This year’s theme is social media-inspired and is a hashtag. #WeArePride.

TICKETS Tickets are now available online at register.growtix.com/e/utah_pride_2016/ with Friday being $5, Saturday and Sunday being $10 each, or the full 3-day weekend being $20. An Emerald Pass for $50 will get people in early, give exclusive access to the Emerald Garden with seating near the stage, and a bonus t-shirt.

Tickets will also be available at the gates at a slightly higher price, but for the first time, credit cards will be accepted there.

LAYOUT CHANGES One change people will notice is, due to pending construction on Washington Square, the footprint of the event will be smaller. Now, all of Library Square is being used, but three-fourths of Washington Square will be fenced off.

Bids are still being taken for a project to replace pedestrian lighting on the square, plus all electrical. Additionally, trees are scheduled to be pruned or removed. Work will likely not be underway during the festival, but city officials still limited the availability for the festival.

GRAND MARSHAL Rather than paying to bring in a grand marshal for the parade, organizers are taking nominations for three local “icons” to head the festivities. Q More information on the festival can be found at ­utahpridefestival.org or facebook.com/utahpridefestival

The Go-Gos’ Belinda Carlisle to headline the Utah Pride Festival

The Go-Go’s

are heading out on their nationwide Farewell Tour, but they are not coming to Salt Lake City. In fact, the closest they will get is Phoenix. For $80+ a ticket (with fees).

But lead singer Belinda Carlisle, the vivacious lead singer of the most successful all-female band in American history, is.

She will be performing at the Utah Pride Festival.

The Go-Gos were the first all-female band in America that wrote and performed their own music, formed in 1978.

Carlisle has been performing lately as a solo act, but don’t expect her to leave her bouncy Go-Go persona too far behind “They’re both equal part of me,’’ Carlisle said of the band and her seven and soonto-be-eight-solo album career.

“The Go-Go’s is a different working situation,’’ Carlisle said. “I have the camaraderie of the band, which is great. For me, it’s my roots, but it’s a totally different thing than doing my own thing.’’

The Go-Go’s made a living with that quintessential MTV pop sound in such songs as “Vacation’’ and “We Got the Beat.’’

Her solo work includes hints of that, but really is a lot deeper, boasting lush production and even hints of Edith Piaf angst, sung in French, since that is where she spends her down time.

“I grew up with lushly produced pop songs, and then in my late teens, I got into the New York scene, with Lou Reed, the Velvet Underground and the Sex Pistols,’’ she said.

“When the Go-Go’s formed, we had a certain pop sensibility, but we always aspired to be more punk-pop, like the Buzzcocks,’’ she said. “But part of me is very, very pop.’’

Pop, however can seem like the shallow end of the musical gene pool, so to speak.

“Pop is not a dirty word to me,’’ chided Carlisle, who said she does “get’’ that some people have a less than high regard for the genre. “But there’s nothing like a good pop song that carried you away. My favorite songs in the world are all pop songs. It’s definitely an art form.’’

So, the question is, why is the group breaking up. Are the Go-Go’s really gone gone?

“It really IS a farewell tour,’’ she said.

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“We feel we’re ending on a good note.

There’s no acrimonious dynamic in the band. We just don’t want to go on too long. That would just be sad, and it’s easy to go on too long.”

Carlisle sat with our Chris Azzopardi and chatted about telling her gay son about her own “sexually adventurous” experiences and the reason she cares about gay rights now more than ever.

Which song of yours has the most significance to you? Oh gosh. The first one that comes to mind is “Heaven is a Place on Earth,” only because it was so huge and it really established my career not just in this country but all over the world.

The song you wish you didn’t have to sing ever again? Um, yes. There are a few of them. But they’re songs that people insist on hearing. (Laughs) I don’t like doing “Heaven” in rehearsal. I don’t like doing “We Got the Beat” in rehearsal. There are certain songs I get lazy about in rehearsal, but when I do them live, just the reaction from the audience makes it OK. But yeah, there are some songs you’re like, “Uh, next!” (Laughs) Hardcore fans seem to agree that “Runaway Horses” is your greatest solo album. I think so, too. I love some of the songs on there.

“Summer Rain” makes the whole album for me. That and “Mad About You” are my two favorite songs of my career. “Voila” is my other favorite, but for different reasons.

The production of “Runaway Horses” just kind of captured a moment.

If you could relive any part of the ‘80s, what would it be? Oh god, I don’t know if I’d want to relive any of the ‘80s. I think I did the ‘80s really well, so I think it’s time for me to move on from that. There’s not really one thing I’d like to repeat, to be perfectly honest.

Especially not the clothes, right? (Laughs) Definitely not the fashion, that’s for sure.

Do you still have any of the clothes from that era? There’s one dress that I have. I used to wear it out up until about 15 years ago. It’s like a square dance dress, but now I would just look like some scary bag lady if I put it on, like someone trying to be young and fresh. (Laughs) It’s in my closet, and it’s still really cute, but I don’t think I could wear it again.

How does being the mother of a gay son change the way you see your gay fans? Is it like an extended family now? Actually, it kind of is. You know, I’ve always kind of gotten it, because from the beginning, my friends have been 90 percent gay and lesbian. That’s just the way it’s been for me. So I’d rather have a gay son than a straight son, let me just say that. But now, I look at it differently, because I know that when my son told me, it was like, “What’s life gonna be like for him?” “Is he going to be treated equally wherever he goes?” I think about that for any gay person now, and I never really thought about that before. Now I think about how the world is toward gay people, and although it’s better, we’re still not 100 percent accepting.

If you’ve been around gay people your whole life, what about James coming out shocked you? Well, it shocked me and it didn’t shock me; I had little clues along the way. So I was driving the car and he goes, “I like boys,” and I had to pull the car over. It was like someone socked me in the stomach, although it was totally fine. The first thing I thought about was, “How am I gonna tell your father?”

I was fine with it. [James] said something really smart: “My sexuality does not define me.” For a 14-year-old to say that, that’s pretty unbelievable. For me, the hardest part was thinking, “What is the world going to be like for him as a gay person?”

I had to go to my therapist because I went through all those stupid things: Was it something I did? Something I said? Things I’m sure any parent kind of goes through, and I knew it wasn’t. This is just the way it is. He was born gay.

I don’t think it’s uncommon for parents to be like, “Was it my fault?” “Did we watch too much ‘Golden Girls’?” It’s normal.

And it’s funny — he loved “I Love Lucy,” he went to “Phantom of the Opera” and loved Andrew Lloyd Webber. We laugh about it now. When I look back on it, there are funny little clues, but there are other things that were more telling and very peripheral that I really can’t go into, but still, I thought, “What have I done?

Did I indulge him when I went to get his costume at The Disney Store for Sleeping

Beauty and Snow White?”

My therapist said that I should have my son tell my husband, but I thought, “No.” Instinctively, it’s something that I need to do, because what if he had a bad reaction, even though I knew he wouldn’t, but you never know. When I told him, he was like, “It’s just a phase,” and for a year afterwards they went at it back and forth, but now my husband and I can’t imagine having it any other way.

You’ve hinted at being sexually adventurous back in the day, while performing with The Go-Go’s. Everyone was in the ‘80s. Exactly.

I recall reading interviews where you didn’t want to get into details about that time because James reads your interviews. You’ve been so open about most aspects of your life, though, including your drug addiction, so why do you want to shield him from this?

I think most gay kids would think it’s cool, and might feel more accepted, if their parent had a same-sex experience. I know. It’s just funny, I guess, him and I being from different generations and me being more modest with that. He does know that I was adventurous in that way and we kind of joke about it. I don’t necessarily want to go into details, because I want to keep my more conventional secrets secret, too.

My son and I butt heads about anybody’s sexuality, and he thinks that everybody who’s gay and in the closet should come out; it’s their responsibility.

And I say no. I think if a person doesn’t want to come out, it’s their business. They have their reasons. That’s kind of the way I feel about myself, too. But he knows. We laughed about it the other day. I think everybody does (have those experiences) and nobody likes to talk about it, that’s all. Q Carllisle will perform at the Utah Pride Festival. Tickets are available at UtahPrideFestival.org

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More entertainment announced for Utah Pride Festival

Tracy Young It wasn’t only the gay community that was drawn to Young’s magnetic musical pull. Musical legends from Cher to Sean Combs and from Shakira to The Smashing Pumpkins, fell under her spell, booking the disc jockey to spin their exclusive parties.

DJ Luis Perez AB SOTO A regular on RuPaul’s Drag Race, AB’s work as a visual / performance artist and musician is an amalgamation of his Latin roots and early influences; street and pop culture. This combined with a rebellious streak that challenges and questions mainstream gay culture and norms is what defines AB as a recording artist.

AB’s early background as a professional dancer and fashion designer informs his work as the artist he is today — all of AB’s work is original and self produced; choreography, lyric, styling and design.

AB’s art is a stylized commentary on homophobic attitudes present in the dominate culture. His aim is to show the diversity of the more marginalized members of the gay community and bring them to a wider audience.

DJ Luis Perez is one of the fastest up and coming DJ’s currently in the circuit scene. He established himself in San Diego and began taking over dance floors very quickly. Luis made himself a big player in the scene after playing one of the best sets in San Diego Pride that left people wanting more. Soon after that he broke out in LA playing the Masterbeat Halloween Afterhours. He has also headlined in Australia for the Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras.

Now 80 members strong, Utah’s Other Choir, THE SALT LAKE MEN’S CHOIR is one of the state’s oldest member supported arts organizations. The choir represented the State of Utah with a performance at the National Cathedral in Washington, DC and participated in the Cultural Festival of Gay Games performing at the Sydney Opera House in Sydney, Australia.

The SISTER WIVES band is a rockin’ assortment of blues musicians, each with a diverse musical background. They started in January 2003 at numerous regional festivals, clubs, live television, and private shows.

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A New Family, A New Legacy DJ Suzy Bean Local DJ Suzy Bean has been seen and heard on U92, at Jam and Club Sound.

She will kick off the opening ceremonies entertainment Friday Night June 3 and keep the main stage party going through the night.

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24 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | VIEWS

views

gaysaltlake.com | issue 255 | may 2016

NC Governor and legislators are bullies Skye Thomson, a transgender 9th grader from North Carolina, sent an open letter to Gov. Pat McCrory explaining what it’s like to be a transgender student and asking the governor to meet with him:

DEAR GOV. MCCRORY: My name is Skye Thomson. I am 15 years old, I live in Eastern North Carolina, and I am a transgender boy. That means I was born a female and identify as a male.

I was in Raleigh for the debate on House Bill 2 on March 23. I was the only transgender student who got a chance to speak out against HB2, the so called “bathroom bill” that is supposed to keep everyone safe in bathrooms. But it doesn’t keep everyone safe, especially people like me. Imagine yourself in my shoes, being a boy walking into a ladies room. It’s awkward and embarrassing and can actually be dangerous. By putting this law in place you’re putting kids like me in danger.

I’ve dealt with bullying my whole life. And now I feel that my own state lawmakers and governor are bullying me as well. I face daily harassment for being myself, everything from dirty looks to physical assaults. I don’t report them because I know it will just make the other kids bully me more. In schools all over the place transgender kids go through the same thing every day. Because of the constant harassment, I have had more than one transgender friend attempt suicide.

HB2 just gives other students all the more reason to hate us.

After my speech at the HB2 hearing, two people from your staff invited me to a private meeting. They said that you wanted to learn more about the difficulties transgender kids like me face. At the end of our meeting, I asked your staff if I could meet with you in person before you made your decision about HB2. I hoped that if we met you would see that I’m just like any other kid, a kid worth protecting. I wanted to tell you my story, really bad things that have happened to

me that I’m not comfortable sharing in this letter and that should never happen to a kid. Your staff said they would try to find a way for us to meet, but we never did. You signed HB2 into law an hour later.

Governor, I would still like to meet

with you if at all possible. My friends would like to meet with you too. We think that if you get to know us, you will work on helping to keep us safe in bathrooms and everywhere else we go.

Thank you for your time, SKYE THOMSON, 9th Grader

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guest editorial

The Importance of Community

BY CHORD MARTET

I grew up

in a large, red (conservative) state in the Midwest. I always knew I was different but didn’t really understand how. The idea that I might be gay actually never crossed my mind. It wasn’t until puberty and attending high school that I started to understand how different I was and how that difference would be a problem for others.

High school was a complete nightmare.

Even though I never looked at other guys, didn’t date guys and wasn’t out somehow people knew I was gay. I was verbally abused on a regular basis and quite frequently I’d arrive at school to find the word “FAG” written on my locker. The abuse didn’t end at school. On multiple occasions other kids would toilet paper our house and write the word “FAG” in soap on my parent’s car windows.

This type of abuse continued all four years of high school. As a result I withdrew from the other students. The idea of being around people gave me anxiety. I suspect that’s the primary reason I decided to go to a commuter college, even though I was accepted at every university to which I applied. The idea of having to deal with other people was unappealing.

I used to cry myself to sleep at night,

knowing that I would never be happy and would die alone. That misery persisted for years as I continued to isolate myself and comfort myself with food. I was inactive, fat and extremely depressed.

I stayed that way until the day I decided I had enough. Fortunately, that decision didn’t entail taking my life—not that I hadn’t considered it. It entailed coming out to my parents, putting down the junk food, getting off the couch, getting active, and most importantly, reaching out to others.

The reason I’m sharing such personal information is because I know, first-hand, what isolation does to people. It can lead to depression, unhealthy decisions and, in some cases, suicide. I feel the best way to combat isolation and its associated effects is through community—having a sense of belonging. That’s one of the reasons that, after moving to Salt Lake City, I decided to form a social group for gay, bisexual and transgender men. We’re stronger when we’re together.

That brings me to the actual topic of this article—the need for a more connected community. When I moved to Salt Lake City I was excited to discover a rich and vibrant LGBT community. I immediately got involved. After a while I started to notice the lack of communication, coordination, and collaboration between LGBT

organizations and the diverse parts of the community. What would the rainbow flag be if all of its colors weren’t united together?

Thankfully a collection of organizations and individuals are reviving the former Gay and Lesbian Community Council of Utah.

The mission of the new LGBT Community Council is to bring organizations and individuals together to share information, to coordinate activities that address community needs, and to host collaborative events for the benefit of the LGBT community. The vision of new LGBT Community Council is simple—to improve the wellness of the LGBT community in the greater Salt Lake City area.

The organizers of this new community council have created a Facebook group, “LGBT Community Council (Greater SLC).” If you’re a LGBT organization or an individual who feels strongly about the wellness of the community and wish to participate please request to join the group—everyone is welcome. Monthly meetings will begin in May. I have great hopes for this new collaboration. After all, Communication + Unity = Community! Q Chord Martet is a Salt Lake City resident and an organizer of Men Who Move, menwhomove.org, a social group for 18+ year old gay, bisexual and transgender men in the Salt Lake City area.

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BY CHRISTOPHER KATIS

to admit that lately the boys and I haven’t been getting along very well. Niko and I are so similar that we butt heads regularly.

And Gus is on the brink of being a teenager, making me totally understand why boarding schools exist. But do you know what? My kids are amazing. Let me tell you, they’re the fabulous in my life.

So rather than dwell on why they drive me crazy, I’ve decided to celebrate why they’re fabulous.

Gus reminds me so much of my dad that it’s crazy. Somehow he even likes like his grandfather.

He’s never met a stranger and makes friends easier than anyone I’ve ever known. He has absolutely no tolerance for racism or bigotry, and will call you out on it — even if “black Labradors” are what they’re called. He took his undefeated hockey season with grace and humility … and appropriate bravado. He likes scary shows, and the humor of Seth MacFarlane.

Niko makes me laugh like no one else in the world. He has a fashion style entirely his own.

Who says electric purple shorts and a blood red button-up shirt with an embroidered dragon don’t work together? Certainly the one green and one yellow sock pull it all together! I love that he digs jewelry and doesn’t give a shit that his big brother says boys don’t wear pearls.

He asked to go an opera for his birthday, and suggested we both wear bow ties. He conducted himself with maturity beyond his years. And I love the fact that he got in trouble at school last year for flipping off a kid who wouldn’t accept his apology after Niko accidentally crashed into him.

I love the fact that Gus and I can have an entire conversation with just a glance at each other.

I love the fact that Niko squeezes me too tightly when he says goodnight.

The boys are so fabulous they even make me a better gay man. Not that I was ever a bad one. They force me to come out all of the time to people who wouldn’t otherwise need to know. Emails to teachers or calls to coaches don’t come from Gus’s or Niko’s dad, they come from “one of their dads.” Hockey games, soccer practices, Scouts, parent-teacher conferences and the myriad of other kid-required activities make us have to be out.

And I think that’s a good thing in general, but it’s imperative for the boys. They have to explain about their family situation enough without us shirking our responsibilities.

Granted, there have been a few awkward times, like the time a first grade teacher quizzed me about our living situation and then felt it appropriate to tell me how difficult a divorcing lesbian couple had been the previous year.

I’m not a perfect dad. In fact, I think I’m doing a pretty terrible job most days. But then again, the boys are turning out to be great guys. They’re well-mannered, respectful and fun to be around. Other people tell me all the time what great kids they are, and how we’re doing a wonderful job raising them. Some days I let myself believe that. Other days I think we’re frauds. The truth probably lies somewhere in the middle.

I suppose that doubt, that questioning I struggle with every day is an expected part of parenthood.

I also suspect that those feelings are intensified because I’m a gay dad. Whether justified or not, gay and lesbian parents still have to prove themselves. And so far, we’re raising a couple of amazing boys. And that’s fabulous. Q

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may 2016 | issue 255 | gaysaltlake.com

creep of the month

Tom Casperson

BY D’ANNE WITKOWSKI

Recently

a friend of a friend posted an Advocate article to Facebook about a woman being kicked out of the women’s restroom at Fishbone’s restaurant in Detroit because she looked like a man. She wasn’t a man. She was a cisgender woman with short hair who apparently liked comfy clothes. And so a security guard allegedly assaulted her, throwing her out onto the street.

The person who posted it made a comment somewhere along the lines of, “Is anyone surprised to see this happening now?” She was referring to the rabid anti-trans climate nationwide spurred on by the so-called bathroom bills that are seeking to keep trans men and women out of public restrooms. These bills stoke the fears of people who don’t understand what transgender means or think it’s some kind of sin against God. Anti-LGBTQ law like the ones passed in states like North Carolina and Mississippi could be coming to Michigan.

Being debated right now in Michigan is a draft by the State Board of Education of guidance for creating “Safe and Supportive Learning Environments for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Questioning Students.”

My first thought when I heard about this: it’s about time.

Unfortunately, the first thought a lot of other people had was of boys putting on dresses so they could use the girls’ locker room to look at titties. This is not only ridiculous, but it’s insulting to the trans- or genderfluid students who face the possibility of harassment and even violence every time they have to pee or change for gym.

State Sen. Tom Casperson, REscanaba, is one of those people with visions of sexual deviants

dancing through his head. And he thinks Michigan should make it illegal to use a locker or rest room that doesn’t match your birth gender. Totally stupid.

Detroit Free Press reported “Casperson said transgender students should be able to use staff facilities or their own bathrooms only with parental consent, and that they should be barred from using bathrooms that don’t match their birth certificate.”

Making trans students use staff restrooms (or even a bathroom of their very own!) might seem like no biggie. But the key here is “only with parental consent.” For some trans students, school is their safe space. Some aren’t out to their parents or have parents who don’t accept their identity. All that aside, however, it is blatantly discriminatory to make trans students use segregated restrooms.

Casperson was pretty clear about what he thinks of trans students. “Maybe, there’s something there that’s just not normal,” he told the Free Press. “And normal’s not the right word.

Maybe there’s something there that’s just not right, where we’re mixing these kids together.”

I’d be very curious to know who Casperson thinks “these kids” are and if he’s ever met and spoken with a trans student.

Then again, it’s hard to imagine that Casperson would be interested in such an audience considering he has already dismissed them as people.

Casperson doesn’t care. Better to address the false problem of trans predators in toilet stalls than the very real problems of trans students’ high rates of being bullied and of depression and suicide. Casperson would likely argue that they brought it on themselves by choosing not to be “normal.” Q

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Gidday,

Muffins! How the hell are ya?

Yes Darlings, it’s me, your long lost glittery gal pal Ruby Ridge, back in the burg for a quick visit. And let me tell you what a study of contrasts this visit has been! I left my little glamour shack on the west coast of Australia where it was a summery 102 degrees and landed in Utah where it has snowed for three days. Really Zion?

That’s my welcome back after three years in the Outback? I was expecting Governor Herbert with a muffin basket or at least one of the more senior Apostles with a book of Chuck-a-Rama coupons, but no, it wasn’t to be. Thankfully I had had a week in Hong Kong to ease into winter, but now I can’t tell if I have a horrible head cold or if I am coming down with Asian Bird Flu.

Either way, I’m going through tissues like Jackie Biskupski goes through cabinet members.

Speaking of Hong Kong, Petals, what a fun little village. By divine providence there was a sauna just down the street from my hotel that caters to Asian bears.

OMG! I know right? I was in smooth chubby Asian butt heaven, and compared to my adorable rotund little Chinese counterparts, my Caucasian penile berth came across like a Ginger Mandingo! I don’t care what Kenny Rogers says, Ruby was definitely taking her love to town. The whole experience was really validating and great for my self esteem, but the highlight, Cherubs, can be summed up in three simple words .... Chinese weight lifter. Oh my god, Darlings, he was built! The quads ... dear lord, the quads ... words cannot describe how solid and smooth. Somewhere along the Great Wall of China, there is a chunk missing because I banged that slab all the way to Mongolia.

Because you know me Pumpkins, if there is one thing I love more than Chinese takeout ... it’s Chinese put it back in!

Now some of you may see this as an appalling act of random sexual gratification but I believe it was much more than that. I

think of it as fostering goodwill, breaking down barriers and strengthening international relations. And before you judge too quickly, let me tell you this: I

learned a valuable life lesson there in that dim little corner of China — with its centuries of history, wisdom and philosophy — I will treasure, until the day I die, that you must always open the condom before you get lube on your hands!

Seriously, Kittens, otherwise it’s a complete nightmare: Trying to dry your hands on a towel that is halfway across the pitchdark room and praying to god that it’s not his towel because you know, that would be tacky, and you still end up tearing the damn packet open with your teeth. Meanwhile he’s face down, bum up, wondering what’s taking so long, and realizing all of the propaganda he’s heard about dumb, slow, lazy Americans is actually true.

Speaking of dumb, slow, lazy Americans, what the hell is going on with the presidential campaign people?

If I may humbly speak on behalf of the rest of the world: America, have you completely lost your shit? Do you, as the last remaining superpower, with more nukes than God, really want a president with the intellectual capacity of a Jell-O shot like Donald Trump having access to launch codes? I will be so glad to be back in Australia before the conventions or I would be screaming at CNN on my big screen like a maniac. I would be a danger to myself and those around me, sort of like when I was driving on the wrong side of the road along West Temple last week. I bet that Trax engineer needed a change of pants ... but he will never again doubt my resolve!

Well, I am now off to self-medicate at the new Popeye’s that opened down the street. It’s lovely to be back, and it’s so great to see all of your happy, inbred little faces again.

MMMWWWAAHHHH! Q

VIEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 29

may 2016 | issue 255 | gaysaltlake.com

LOWER YOUR LOWER BACK PAIN

29

Long Live the Queen!

• No Appointments • Convenient Hours • Open 7 Days a Week • Chiropractic Physicians Winner

2013, 2014, 2015, 2016 Fabby Awards “Best Chiropractic Clinic”

saltlakecitychiropractor-thejoint.com Sugar House / 1126 E. 2100 S

801-467-8683

Hours: Mon-Fri 10-7, Sat-Sun 10-5

OPENING RECEPTION: APR 29 | 7PM

OUT LOUD

20 S W E S T T E M P L E | S LC U T 84101 | U TA H M O C A.O R G

30 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FABBY AWARDS

gaysaltlake.com | issue 255 | may 2016

Most Fabulous Contemporary Restaurant

Current

2016 FABBY

AWARDS

It’s that time of year again — our anniversary! We are now entering our lucky 13th year. Oh yeah — that also means it’s time to announce the 2016 Fabby Award winners.

We had a record 6,979 responses this year! Thanks so much for voting for your favorite places to wine, dine, shop, dance, and get your hairs did! Without further ado:

RESTAURANTS Most Fabulous Inexpensive Restaurant

Oh Mai

Sometimes you just gotta have a Bahn Mi for five bucks. And when you read a review like “Dear unborn baby Jesus, I just discovered the best Vietnamese food in the world, don’t ask questions take your hungry ass there ASAP!! You’ll thank me later,” ya gotta go to one of Oh Mai’s four locations in the valley and slurp some pho.

2. The Other Place | 3. Spitz

Most Fabulous After-Hours Cravings

Pie Hole

Every downtown dweller knows this (Pie) Hole in the wall, where you can stroll, stumble, or stagger after a night at the bar or club for delicious pizza-bythe-slice. Open until 3am on

weekends (2am Sunday through Thursday), Pie Hole also offers whole pies and downtown delivery (including Avenues and Capitol Hill) for those nights when even stumbling and staggering are out of the question.

2. Off Trax | 3. Alberto’s

Most Fabulous Local Restaurant for Breakfast

Penny Ann’s

Rumor has it that Penny got her “Heavenly Hot Cakes” recipe from St. Peter himself. True or not, they’re aptly named, and great on their own or with any of the host of delicious sandwiches, skillets, omelets, etc. on Penny’s impressive breakfast menu.

2. The Other Place | 3. Park Café

Most Most Fabulous Vegetarian and/ or Vegan

Sage’s

Whether you love vegetables or just tolerate them — or even if you’ve assiduously avoided them since that string bean incident when you were twelve — Sage’s thoughtful approach to plantbased cuisine will quickly win your heart (and your stomach).

2. Zest | 3. Vertical Diner

This new East Broadway hotspot is where all the hippest oysters from both East and West Coasts (and around the world) want to be. Enjoy the stunning contemporary styling and decor, but don’t let it distract you from the equally stunning interpretations of classic American seafood dishes (or landfood dishes, if that’s more your thing).

2. Copper Onion | 3. Finca

Most Fabulous in Park City

Wasatch Brew Pub

Appropriately perched at the tippy-top of Park City’s Main Street, Wasatch Brew Pub rises above the rest with a menu that somehow elevates pub food to haute cuisine. Complement your meal with one of Wasatch’s award-winning ales or lagers and bask in the old-timey saloon feel of this Park City favorite.

2. High West | 3. No Name Saloon

Most Fabulous in Ogden

Roosters

Who would drive 40 miles for a cock? Any Salt Lake City resident who’s ever been to Rooster’s! Enjoy anything from

may 2016 | issue 255 | gaysaltlake.com ROOSTERS, OGDEN

FABBY AWARDS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 31

No dental insurance?

Save money with our dental discount plan For as little as $15/m you can enjoy all the benefits of dental insurance.

a burger to a herb-crusted rack of lamb at Rooster’s, housed in a former Chinese-laundry-slashbrothel on Ogden’s historic 25th Street, and wash the meal down with one of their dozen unique craft beers.

2. Two Bit Café | 3. Tona Sushi

Most Fabulous Asian Cuisine

J Wong’s Bistro

East meets East in a melding of Chinese and Thai cuisines that draws on proprietor Jordan Wong’s family roots to create an innovative contemporary take on Asian Fusion. When the most common word on a restaurant’s review page is “Awesome!”, you know you can’t go wrong eating at Wong’s.

2. Takashi | 3. Café Trang

Most Fabulous Thai Cuisine

Sawadee

When Salt Lake City puts on its best Thai to go out for dinner, it goes to Sawadee. The authentic menu offers the best in traditional curries, stir-fries, salads, and soups, all served in generous portions at reasonable prices (especially the lunch specials!) in a relaxed, casual atmosphere (no tie required).

2. Thai Siam | 3. My Thai

Most Fabulous Mexican / Latin Cuisine

Red Iguana

Holy mole! Ignore the humble location and talk to the line of hungry Mexican cuisine aficionados wrapping around the building. Diez out of diez agree that you won’t find a better mole sauce anywhere in Utah. It’s definitely worth the wait (which, due to Red Iguana’s exceptional service, will almost certainly be shorter than you expect).

2. La Fronterra | 3. La Hacienda

Most Fabulous Mediterranean Cuisine

Mazza

Mazza’s fresh, authentic take on Middle Eastern cuisine never fails to impress. Begin your meal with a starter sampler of baba ganooj , hummus, and labneh, then prepare to be blown away by the intense flavors of any of their kebabs, shawarmas, falafels, or other entrees.

Complement your meal with a selection from the comprehensive wine list, which includes several Lebanese and Israeli choices.

2. Café Med | 3. Spitz

 Free exams  Free x-rays  Free cleanings  40% off all treatment

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Salt Lake 2150 S. Main St 104 801-883-9177

Bountiful 425 S. Medical Dr 211 801-397-5220

www.alpenglowdentists.com

To schedule an appointment, please call 801.878.1700 Evening and Saturday Appointments Available Most Insurances Accepted

Evans and Early Mortuary Serving all Faiths & Communities Since 1890 with affordable dignified services

Take a tour of our beautifully renovated facility 574 East 100 South, Salt Lake City, UT

801-355-5323 / Fax 801-355-6177 www.evans-earlymortuary.com evansandearly@gmail.com

32 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FABBY AWARDS

gaysaltlake.com | issue 255 | may 2016

by a quintessential coffeeshop vibe, Coffee Garden is the place to go. Choose a pastry or sandwich from the display case, have the barista whip you up some caffeinated heaven, then kick back and enjoy.

2. People’s Coffee | 3. Publik

Most Fabulous Wine & Beer Selection

The Bayou

Do you have trouble making choices?

Then you might want to steer clear of The Bayou, whose selection of over 300 beers can paralyze even the most decisive drinker (though there’s an app for that). The Cajunand Creole-inspired menu will give you something delicious to nosh on while you deliberate between the Piraat Triple Hop and the Red Rock Elephhino.

2. Squatter’s | 3. Beerhive

Most Fabulous Burger Joint

Lucky 13 Most Fabulous Sushi

Takashi

Takashi is on a roll, topping this list once again — not surprising, given their innovative and contemporary take on Japanese cuisine.

Choose from a varied menu of signature rolls, perfectly prepared with the freshest fish, and wash it down with a choice from Takashi’s broad selection of sake.

2. Sapa | 3. Tsunami

Most Fabulous Steakhouse

Ruth’s Chris

Quarter-pounders are for amateurs. The burgers at Lucky 13 start with 7 oz of chopped chuck, grilled to perfection. Choose from a variety of signature burgers, each carefully accessorized with both traditional (bacon, of course!) and non-traditional toppings (peanut butter on a hamburger? Don’t knock it until you’ve tried it!)

2. Crown Burger | 3. Tony Burger’s

FOOD Most Fabulous Sandwiches

Even Stevens

Done right, the perfect steak becomes an almost religious experience. Which probably makes Ruth (who purchased the original Chris Steak House in New Orleans in 1965) something of a saint. Bring your appetite, because the high price of a meal is reflected in the massive portion sizes.

2. Flemming’s | 3. Ruby River

Gourmet sandwiches plus social responsibility? Yes, please. Buy salad or sandwich (try the “Do Gouda!”) and they’ll donate food worth an equivalent amount to a local nonprofit dedicated to serving our community’s hungry. The ingredients are fresh, the combinations are inspired, and the warm fuzzies are priceless.

2. Moochie’s | 3. Robin’s Nest

Most Fabulous Local Coffee House

Most Fabulous Pizza

If you prefer your morning caffeine fix to be made with quality beans and accompanied

Cheese makes everything better. We all know this. It stands to reason that more

Coffee Garden

The Pie

cheese makes everything more better, which might explain how The Pie Pizzeria has been winning hearts for decades. The thick layer of gooey mozzarella on a Pie pizza is part of the perfect balance of crust, sauce, cheese, and toppings that makes The Pie a consistent Fabby winner.

2. Settebello | 3. Pie Hole

Most Fabulous Pastries

Gourmandise

Let’s play word association. I say “French”, you say … “pastries”, of course! And if you appreciate pastries, you’ll definitely appreciate Gourmandise, whose very name means “indulging in good eating”. The cases of mouth-watering sweet and savory creations are nearly as much fun to look at as they are to eat. Don’t drool on the glass.

2. Tulie | 3. Les Madeleine

Most Fabulous Seafood

Market Street

In the back wall of the walk-in cooler in the kitchen of Market Street Grill is a portal, which leads to a wharf on an undisclosed island where fishermen dock with their daily catches. Or at least I assume how the seafood is so fresh in a restaurant 700 miles from the nearest ocean.

2. Current | 3. Oyster Bar

Most Fabulous Salads

Café Rio

This isn’t the first year this Mexican(-ish) food chain has won this award. When Sweet Pork Barbacoa and Creamy Tomatillo Dressing join fresh lettuce, cheese, beans, rice, and salsa, something magic happens.

2. Red Rock | 3. The Dodo

Most Fabulous Sunday Brunch

Drag Brunch

An astounding success only three months after its launch, Salt Lake City’s Drag Brunch at Club X lets you enjoy a handmade omelette while you sip mimosas out of a pitcher and enjoy performances from our amazing local Queens. What’s not to love?

2. Grand America | 3. Little America

may 2016 | issue 255 | gaysaltlake.com

FABBY AWARDS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 33

Pride Counseling

TRY-ANGLES’ THOSE BITCHES

• Support Groups • Holistic Approach • Build Intimacy & Trust • Explore Spiritual Options • Strengthen Relationships • Transgender Issues

Jerry Buie MSW, LCSW

BARS Most Fabulous Gay Bar

Try-Angles

Sometimes you wanna go where everybody knows your name.

Try-Angles is that place, and it consistently earns its place as a foundation stone for the local gay community.

2. Jam | 3. Sun Trapp

Most Fabulous Gay-Friendly Straight Bar

Piper Down

Dollar mimosas at Sunday brunch. How much more gayfriendly can you get?

2. Tavernacle | 3. Bar X

Most Fabulous Karaoke

Tavernacle

If you like to sing, or like to listen to others sing, or like to drink to make others’ singing tolerable, head to the Tavernacle on Sunday or Tuesday night (or try their Bingo Karaoke on Monday!)

2. Jam | 3. Try-Angles

Most Fabulous Bar to Watch Sports

Lumpy’s

Walk into Lumpy’s, and you might wonder if you’ve wandered into a TV showroom by mistake.

TVs on every wall and in every booth mean you can watch ALL

of the sportsing, at the same time.

2. Legends | 3. Green Pig

801.595.0666 Office 801.557.9203 Cell 1174 E Graystone Way, Suite 20-E JerryBuie@mac.com WWW.PRIDECOUNSELING.TV

Most Fabulous Dance Club

Jam

Flashing lights. A sick beat. Plenty of alcohol, and sweaty, sexy, shirtless guys (on both sides of the bar!)… JAM is unquestionably the place to go when you want to get your dance on.

2. Metro | 3. One80

Most Fabulous Afternoon Crowd

Sun Trapp

Afternoon drinking is a chill affair, so where better to do it than Sun Trapp, where the bartenders and patrons alike greet you with a smile and a friendly hello?

2. Try-Angles | 3. Piper Down

Most Fabulous Micro-Brewery

Squatter’s

Great beer, great food, great brunch (with $2 mimosas or bloody marys)… Squatter’s has it all! Choose from a full menu of craft brews to complement your meal, and take home a growler of your favorite!

2. Red Rock | 3. Epic

Cheapest Drinks

Try-Angles

Not the only reason they won “best gay bar”, but…

2. Sun Trapp | 3. Cheers

Our 30th year of making customers happy!

GREEN

34 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FABBY AWARDS

Most Fabulous Friday Night

Try-Angles

Ease into the weekend.

2. Sun Trapp | 3. One80

Most Fabulous Saturday Night

Jam

Dance the night away.

2. Try-Angles | 3. Sun Trapp

Most Fabulous Sunday Night

Sun Trapp

Recover, so you can do it all again next week.

2. Try-Angles | 3. Jam

Most Fabulous Monthly Bar Event

blackBOOTS @ Try-Angles

CODE Night at Try-Angles is presented every fourth Friday by blackBOOTS, Salt Lake City’s leather/fetish/gear community.

Free admission if you’re in gear, $2 cover if you’re just there to see other guys in gear.

2. Drag Brunch | 3. Leather & Gear Might @Try-Angles

ARTS Most Fabulous Local Visual Artist

Cat Palmer

Cat’s photography consistently expresses themes of feminine empowerment, confidence, hope, an beauty. She has won several awards and her work has been highlighted in dozens of publications.

2. Sandy Parsons | 3. Trent Call

Most Fabulous Local Dance Company

Ballet West

Established in 1963, Ballet West brings a diverse repertoire of ballet to the Utah audience.

2. SB Dance | 3. Ririe Woodbury

Most Fabulous Local Theatre Company

SLAC

For 45 years, Salt Lake Acting Company has produced seasons of provocative and thoughtful theater for an open-minded and adventurous audience. Perhaps best known for its annual production of Saturday’s Voyeur, SLAC is dedicated to supporting the community through theater.

2. Plan B | 3. Pioneer Theatre Co

gaysaltlake.com | issue 255 | may 2016

SHOPPING Most Fabulous Local Shop for Budget Fashion

iconoCLAD

Love fashion? Hate spending money? Check out iconoCLAD, where you can get fashion-forward “previously rocked” clothes at a fraction of retail and locally created art and accessories.

2. Uptown Cheapskate 3. Pib’s Exchange

Most Fabulous Art Gallery or Museum

Most Fabulous Local Shop for High-End Fashion

Founded in 1931, the Utah Museum of Contemporary Art in downtown Salt Lake City (adjacent to Abravanel Hall) houses art exhibitions that encourage exploration, imagination, and careful thought.

2. UMFA | 3. Utah Natural History Museum

High-end doesn’t need to mean high-priced. The styles you find at Spark in Trolley Square would be at home in the hottest clubs in Berlin and Amsterdam, but Spark’s buyers seek out affordable lines from smaller designers — and they order in small enough quantities that you can be pretty confident that you’ll be the only one in the club rocking that amazing mesh tee with leather shoulder patches.

2. Now & Again | 3. Decades

UMOCA

Most Fabulous Local Play or Musical of 2015

Saturday’s Voyeur

This annual lampoon of local life, religion, politics, and culture has become a fixture in Salt Lake City theater. Sometimes poignant, often raucous, and always hilarious, Saturday’s Voyeur provides a welcome opportunity for Utah liberals to laugh at the frequent absurdity of life here.

2. Climbing with Tigers | 3. Book of Mormon | 4. The Kreutzer Sonata

Most Fabulous Local Musician or Band

Joshua James

Based in American Fork, Joshua James is the kind of singer that will give you stink face. In a good way. His raspy voice treats his folk-inspired music to a T. If you’re not listening to him, start.

2. Royal Bliss | 3. Neon Trees

Spark

Most Fabulous Underwear Selection

Spark

Nothing boosts confidence like a sexy pair of underwear. Even if nobody sees them, you know how hot you look when the clothes come off. There’s no better selection of hot briefs, trunks, g-strings, and jock straps than at Spark, with its racks and racks of fashion labels like Andrew Christian, N2N, Cell Block, Nasty Pig, Papi, and Diesel.

2. Mischievous | 3. Cockers

Most Fabulous Local Shop for Shoes

Spark

Oh… did we mention the high-end shoes? Watch heads turn as you sashay down the street in the sexiest footwear this side of Milan.

2. Iconoclad | 3. Fice

Most Fabulous Local Shop For Drag Attire

Decades

It’s possible that the shop was named Decades because that’s how long you could spend browsing the racks upon racks of vintage dresses, gowns, skirts, slacks, blazers, coats, shoes, gloves, hats, and accessories…

But more likely the name refers to the fact that you’re bound to find something incredible from ANY decade in the last hundredplus years. With such an abundance of vintage fashion literally at your fingertips, drag glamour becomes almost too easy.

2. Spark | 3. Savers

Most Fabulous Local Book Store

King’s English

Tucked away in the charming 15th & 15th shopping district is a FABBY little store … a warren of shelves and rooms stacked with books on any and every subject: romance novels, philosophical tracts, histories, cookbooks… if you can’t find it here, you don’t need it. The staff is friendly and knowledgeable, and they clearly love books at least as much as you do.

2. Sam Weller’s | 3. Ken Sanders

Most Fabulous Consignment Store For Furniture

Now & Again

Who hasn’t wished they could be Don Draper? He looks amazing, lives in a world of pristine design and style, and drinks whiskey all day at work. Make that dream a reality at Now & Again with it’s amazing selection of pre-owned 50s–70s atomic, retro, modern, mid-century modern, and Danish furniture, art, and accessories.

Add the final Don Draper touch with a selection of vintage cocktail and barware (for your 10am Old Fashioned).

2. Mod A-Go-Go | 3. Emilie Jayne

may 2016 | issue 255 | gaysaltlake.com

Most Fabulous Antique Store

Now & Again

Sure, kids these days think MidCentury Modern qualifies as “antique”, and Now & Again has MidMod in spades… But their selection goes back further too, and a discerning antique shopper should definitely be stopping in at least weekly to see what new treasures await discovery.

2. Capital City Antique Mall | 3.

Home Again

Most Fabulous Flower Shop

Art Floral

Family owned and operated for two generations, The Art Floral puts Mother Nature to shame with their stunning arrangements.

When you want to say it with flowers, nothing will get your message across better than an arrangement from The Art Floral.

2. Twigs | 3. Especially For You

Most Fabulous Local Shop For Jewelry

ingly innocent to the shockingly risqué. There’s something for everyone on your gift list, whether you’re looking for art, decor, cocktail accessories, gag gifts, greeting cards, or “toys” of a particularly adult nature.

2. Cabin Fever | 3. Tabula Rasa

FABBY AWARDS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 35

Foster homes needed — MEOW!

Most Fabulous Adult Toy Store

Mischievous

You know you’re in for a treat when you approach the pink-andpurple-striped storefront, and you’re not disappointed when you step inside. The walls upon walls of silicone, steel, and glass can be a little bit intimidating to the sexually timid, but the knowledgeable and friendly staff can quickly put you at ease and direct you to whatever flavor of adult fun you might be looking for.

2. Blue Boutique | 3. Cahoots

Together, we can Save Them All . ®

utahfoster@bestfriends.org or 801-574-2417

SERVICES Most Fabulous Hair Salon

Nick James Charlie Hafen Nick James is as good at what Jewelers Gallery he does as he is cute. And that’s This tidy remodeled former grocery store on 1100 East houses one of the Intermountain West’s finest jewelry artists—Charley Hafen. Stop in to browse the ready-made, artisan jewelry he has on hand, and the walls of art from local artists. And when you need something truly special, you’ll have the noteworthy experience of consulting with Charley as he crafts you a beautiful, oneof-a-kind piece of wearable art.

2. Stroud Jewelers | 3. Dancing Crane

Most Fabulous Gift Store

Cahoots

While you’re sipping your latte from Coffee Garden (see “Best Coffee Shop”), stop in next door and browse one of the most eclectic selections of gift items you’ll ever find, from the charm-

damn cute. He is one of the only American Board Certified Hair Colorists in Utah, and combines world class hair cutting education from the biggest names.

2. Lunatic Fringe | 3. Salon Nv

Most Fabulous Caterer

LeCroissant

If you have ever attended a fancy fundraiser or meet-andgreet put on by someone in the local LGBT community you have almost certainly enjoyed the culinary art created by Le Croissant Catering. This family team knows how to make your event the talk of the town, and the only thing that keeps their exquisitely presented food from being too beautiful to eat is that it’s too delicious not to.

2. Harry-It Winston | 3. Cuisine Unlimited

801-308-2050

www.jonjepsen.com

36 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FABBY AWARDS

Most Fabulous Tattoo/Piercing Parlor

Cathedral

Conveniently located across from Library Square, just a few doors down from the Pride Center, Cathedral Tattoo is home to a number of incredibly skilled artists who create masterpieces of ink on skin. Walk-ins are welcome, so you can stop in today and walk out with a new piece of beautiful art to wear forever!

2. Good Times Tattoo | 3. Koi

Most Fabulous Counseling Service

Pride Counseling Jerry Buie has been providing counseling services to LGBT community for over a decade.

“Gay clients should not have to educate their therapist about their mindset or validate their lifestyle,” he says on his website.

This is probably one of the reasons he’s won a FABBY in this category for as long as there have been FABBY Awards.

2. Utah Pride Center | 3. Simple Modern Therapy

Most Fabulous Pet Groomer

Teacup Nannies

Sharon Foster is a small-dog whisperer. If you have a “trouble” dog that has had problems getting groomed, she’s your girl.

She doesn’t kennel or cage. She doesn’t believe in sedation. She just knows how to get a dog to love and trust her enough to let her do a great grooming job. She also gives back to the community in a big way!

2. Shelby Gustin | 3. The Dog Show | 3. Pawhill Pet Spa

Most Fabulous Real Estate Agent

Babs Delay

Babs has helped build this community since the 70s and continues to do so today. She has been in real estate for over 40 years

and owns Urban Utah Homes and Estates and is now chair of the Downtown Merchants Association. Babs’ core value is “It’s not what my city can do for me, it’s what I can do for my city!”.

JFK would be proud.

2. Kelly Favero | 3. Dawn Houghton

Most Fabulous Massage

Kura Door

Once again, this holistic Japanese spa sweeps this category with its eight different kinds of massage, including four-hands and hotstone. Faaaahhhhhbulous.

2. Elements | 3. Massage Envy

Most Fabulous Attorney

Chris Wharton

Chris donates much of his time to helping build this community and representing those who may not have the resources to do so themselves. He was president of the S.J. Quinney College of Law at the University of Utah Student Bar Association and managing editor of the Journal of Law and Family Studies. Chris helped lead a team of attorneys that submitted a brief of amicus curiae (or “friend of the court” brief) to the United States Supreme Court, arguing for equal treatment of LGBT families under the law.

2. Danielle Hawkes | 3. Lauren Barros

Most Fabulous Chiropractor

The Joint

In just a few short years, The Joint in Sugarhouse has become a major part not only of the LGBT community, but of the larger Sugarhouse/SLC area. Sugarhouse is a better place because of owner James Adelman’s leadership in its business and cultural community. It’s a formula that works —The Joint in Sugarhouse has been one of the top locations in a nationwide franchise.

2. Bradley Anderson | 3. David Thompson | 3. Ogden Chiropractic

gaysaltlake.com | issue 255 | may 2016

Most Fabulous Photographer/Studio

Cat Palmer

Cat Palmer developed her insatiable romance with photography at 15 years old against the backdrop of LA with its racial divides, cultural diversity, and economic inequality.

2. David Daniels | 3. David Newkirk

GROUPS Most Fabulous Social Group

blackBOOTS

Barely a year old, blackBOOTS has taken control of the local leather/ fetish community and shown it who’s boss. With monthly meetups (in a secret clubhouse, no less), sponsored gear nights, fetish gear swap meets, and educational events, blackBOOTS has something to offer everyone from the vaguely curious to the trussed, gagged, and blindfolded. Find the group on Facebook.

2. Matron’s Of Mayhem | 3. Men Who Move

Most Fabulous Political Group

Equality Utah

If you think the fight is over, turn on the news and listen to the radical right try to undo everything this community has won. Equality Utah is staffed by very capable people who work tirelessly for us.

2. Utah Stonewall Democrats | 3. Restore Our Humanity

Most Fabulous Health Group

Utah AIDS Fountation

31 years of fighting the good fight to help our community rspond to HIV/AIDS. 2. Planned Parenthood | 3. Utah Pride Center

Most Fabulous Religious Organization

First Baptist Church

Everyone is welcome here. Probably the most Christian church in the valley, in the way they treat everyone. What would Jesus do? Go to First Baptist.

2. Atheists Of Utah | 3. Mormons Building Bridges

Most Fabulous Sports Organization

QUAC

If it swims like a duck… it probably swims with the Queer Utah Aquatic Club (QUAC).

Meeting three times a week at the Fairmont Aquatic Center, QUAC offers lanes for everyone from beginners to mermen (and maids). The QUAC swim and water polo teams have participated in international meets and matches, and their speedo-clad swimmers are always one of the highlights of the annual Utah Pride Parade in June.

2. Pride Softball | 3. Q Kickball

Most Fabulous Radio Station

X96

Surprise! X96 and Radio from Hell win this category… again. Keep on doing what you do, guys!

2. KRCL | 3. KUER

PEOPLE Most Fabulous Leader Of A Queer Organization

Michael Sanders

Sanders was a readers’ choice for QSaltLake’s Person of the Year not only because of his efforts with blackBOOTS, but because of his leadership in the community on important issues.

2. Michael Aaron | 3. Carol Gnade

may 2016 | issue 255 | gaysaltlake.com

Most Fabulous Local DJ

Robbie Rob

Robbie Robb is a real estate agent by day, ripped DJ and bar promoter by night. Check his beats at dj-robbierob.podomatic.com 2. Justin Hollister | 3. Dj Shutter

Most Fabulous Local Radio Personality

Doug Fabrizio

Doug Fabrizio is loved by this community not only because he’s easy on the eyes (and ears), but he’s intelligent, witty and a frequent host of GLBT-related shows and fundraisers.

2. Bill Allred | 3. Kerry Jackson

Most Fabulous Television News Most Fabulous Local Politician

Jim Dabakis

Utah politics can be maddening sometimes, but residents of the state’s 2nd senate district (and by extension, the entire state) can always be assured of at least once voice of sanity, thanks to Jim. Follow him on Facebook for frequent updates (and an occasional diatribe) on the workings of our political machinery.

2. Jackie Biskupski | 3. Rebecca Chavez Houck

Most Fabulous Local Actor Or Actress

Alexis Baigue

Cute as a button and with more spunk than a kitten.

2. Charles Lynn Frost | 3. Deena Maria Manzanares

Most Fabulous Bartender

David Willeitner

Always with a smile, Try-Angles’ David Willeitner is as efficient as he is friendly. Just dont piss him off when he’s wearing a wig.

2. Johnny Harris | 3. Michael Elliott

Fox 13

This award travels between 13 and 2 each year, and seeing who won Most Fabulous Anchor and Reporter, you can guess why it’s in 13’s pocket this year.

2. KUTV | 3. KSL

Most Fabulous Television News Reporter

Ben Winslow

The hardest-working television news reporter in the state is once again rewarded for his efforts with a Fabby award. Find him in August at the Utah Pride Golf Classic, where he will be sipping bloody marys in his golf cart. We have yet to see him with golf club in hand…

2. Big Buddha | 3. Aldo Vazquez

Most Fabulous TV News Anchor

Hope Woodside

Hope Woodside wins yet again…

Could it have anything to do with the fact that she has attended the Fabby Awards for many years now? Or maybe it’s just that she’s gorgeous and charming, with impeccable style.

Oh, and she’s a phenomenal news anchor. I bet that’s it.

2. Mary Nichols | 3. Shauna Lake

FABBY AWARDS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 37

38 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | A&E

gaysaltlake.com | issue 255 | may 2016

The Gay Agenda

BY TONY HOBDAY

CONCERTS Decades ago the Violent Femmes were as fabulous as roller skates and clove cigarettes.

Now, as old as they may be, the confusion could be that I’m referring to Chelle and Donna, the adjunct owners of Club Try-Angles, although Chelle was dubbed even many more years earlier, the “Scar Warrior.” Look out for those manhole covers. Hmmm, what a play on words. Other than full body-tattooed closeted gay Middle Americans with Donald Trump bumper stickers adhered to dented, rusted and askewed Chevy bumpers, the Femmes are looking to be deservingly relevant again. Sorry

2MONDAY — VIOLENT FEMMES

The Depot, 400 South Temple, 8pm. Tickets $36/Adv-$40/ Day of show, smithstix.com

22SUNDAY — PAUL SIMON

Maverik Center, 3200 Decker Lake Dr, WVC, 7pm. Tickets $64.50-144.50, maverikcenter.com

DANCE RAW Moves brings a renowned children’s picture book to like in “Imagine a Day.” Written by poet Sarah L. Thomson and illustrated

by Surrealist painter Robert Gonsalves, this enchanting tale is clearly “magical!”

Enjoy Ballet West’s annual event of world

MOVIES A stunning cast: Susan Sarandon, Rose Byrne, J.K. Simmons and Jason Ritter (okay, mostly because he’s my younger doppleganger!) work their magic in this flick about starting over after your eggs are drier than Fran Drescher’s hairdo! Don’t worry J.K., your eggs are as smooth and silky as your head … huh!

27FRIDAY — THE MEDDLER

Theaters and times vary, through … depends on how good it is. Tickets $6.75-9.25

SPECIAL ENGAGEMENTS Warning: You may end up as fluid as the paint strokes in all the fabulous artwork at tonight’s event. Handcrafted beer by eight participating local breweries will leave your vision as abstract as some of the paintings and sculptures. Enjoy!

The biggest tent in the world is at the parking lot of Shops of South Town in Sandy for a show with 65 majestic equine performers, 45 handlers, acrobats, dancers and musicians.

Now that is a traveling show! See the tent from I-15.

27FRIDAY — UMOCA ART + BEER FLUID ART

Utah Museum of Contemporary Art, 20 W. Temple, 6-9pm.

Tickets $35, artsaltlake.org

THROUGH MAY 15 — CAVALIA’S ODYSSEO

The Shops at South Towne and I-15, Sandy, Times vary.

Tickets $49–199.50, cavalia.net ODYSSEO COURTESY: CAVALIA

Middle America homos but you sexy betches definitely are in the best position.

Awarded with 12 Grammy Awards, although that is 120 times fewer than Michael Aaron’s rendezvouses in his hot tub, Paul Simon will grace the Utah stage tonight. While both are dubbed winners in their fields, I would surmise Michael has the most roadies … that is roadside assistance. Good job Petunia!!

THEATRE premiere, cutting-edge performances. This year includes a full company work by renowned choreographer Jessica Lang. Oh, the horror!!

3TUESDAY — IMAGINE A DAY

Jeanne Wagner Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. 300 South, 6:30pm. Tickets $7, artsaltlake.org

20THURSDAY — INNOVATIONS

Jeanne Wagner Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. 300 South, times vary, through May 28. Tickets $49.50, artsaltlake.org

It’s much more than a delicious sandwich. This musical makes it’s U.S. premiere on the Pioneer Theatre stage this month. Did you watch Prison Break? This is similar … let’s just hope the lead hottie didn’t get pudgy. I wonder what that did to his body tattoo!??!

6FRIDAY — THE COUNT OF MONTE CRISTO

Pioneer Theatre Company, 300 S. 1400 East, times vary, thru May 21. Tickets $21-49, pioneertheatrecompany.org

UPCOMING EVENTS JUNE 3, The Cure, Maverik Ctr, smithstix.com JUNE 3, Macklemore and Ryan Lewis, Saltair, smithstix.com JUNE 29, Janet Jackson, Vivint Smart Home Arena, smithstix.com

A&E | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 39

may 2016 | issue 255 | gaysaltlake.com

Young artists Out Loud at UMOCA The Utah Museum of Contemporary Art is presenting the second installment of Out Loud, an exhibition of art by young participants of the museum’s Out Loud workshop series.

Working with local artists and museum staff over the course of 10 weeks, nine teens explored contemporary art-making processes and created original pieces that share their unique perspectives on the complexities of identifying as a sexual or gender minority.

For these youth, art-making is a meaningful method of expression as well as an opportunity to connect with other members of the LGBTQ+ community. While holding each other accountable for providing an inclusive, safe space for creative action, each artist embraced the chance to learn about such significant concepts as performing gender, intersectionality, memory and more.

Using the workshop series as both an artistic and activist platform,

New Vibes.

June 23-26 Mark your calendar for the fresh sights and sounds of summer as the Festival celebrates its 40th Anniversary with a thank you gift – free entrance on Thursday, June 23!

GET TIX NOW @UAF.ORG

40 Years New

these students will present a collection of individual pieces, including paintings, installations, sculptures and more. Each student drew from varying sources of inspiration, including what materials they were most drawn to; exploring trans* issues and experiences; and incorporating multiple aspects of identity into a singular work. Pervading the exhibition is these students’ continual motivation to address oppression as they experience it in their own lives.

An opening reception will be held Friday, April 29 at 7p.m. The participants will also host their own panel discussion at 6:30p.m., moderated

by Out Loud founder and UMOCA Education Coordinator Elly Baldwin. Q The exhibition runs through July 9 at 20 S. West Temple. Out Loud is sponsored by the LGBT Community Endowment Fund at the Community Foundation of Utah, the B.W. Bastian Foundation and QSaltLake Magazine.

40 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | MANNERS

gaysaltlake.com | issue 255 | may 2016

mr. manners

Spring Cleaning

BY ROCK MAGEN

With

April having come and gone, I am sure we are all ready to say goodbye to the showers, and welcome the flowers. Spring is a representation of renewal, rebirth and a fresh start. The sunshine, the flowers, and not to mention the cash from your tax return, are some of the highlights associated with Spring. There is no better feeling than when you’ve given yourself a fresh start right after winter. So in the sprit of renewal, here are a few tips for a successful spring.

I recommend starting

the season by purging your closet and sell anything you haven’t worn in the last year.

It’s probably a futile effort to convince yourself that you’ll lose the weight you’ve gained.

It’s time to truthfully evaluate your New Years Resolution, and come to terms that if you didn’t stick with the gym from January 1st it’s most likely not going to happen. Now, I am not saying that you should not have your goals, and try to maintain a level of physical fitness. My goal is to prevent you from starring on an episode of “Hoarders,” because you

have kept all of those “skinny” clothes and your best friend decided the best intervention would be to throw you under the bus. If you are not careful, you will know exactly what RuPaul means when she asks, “Where is this bus everyone keeps talking about?”

Do yourself a favor and do a deep cleaning of your living area. Go buy a Swiffer and really dive into getting everything clean. There is something oddly therapeutic about seeing all of the grime and dust you can collect. Cleaning your home will not only make you

Rudy Florez / Hive Pass Rider since 2014

feel better emotionally, but it also helps remove some serious allergens.

Another great spring project is to give your home a “facelift.” Having something new always makes me excited, so each spring I recommend tackling one major home project; and it doesn’t need to be anything drastic. Changing the color of towels and rugs in your bathroom, painting your kitchen a new shade, or even buying a new bedspread can all make a huge difference. If you own your home, I highly recommend taking the time to make some home renovations. If you have the time and the funds (remember that tax return) the renovation can add value to your home. And who doesn’t want to have more equity sooner?

Finally, with all of the empty space in your closet I recommend that you TREAT YOURSELF. Now is a perfect time to try a new style you’ve been eyeing in GQ or seen online. Be a bit more daring with your wardrobe with a bold colored shirt or a double monk strap shoe. Trust me, everyone will notice, and with all of the work you’ve done, it could land you a date or at least the chance to host a party in your newly cleaned and updated home.

In parting, just remember, the key to happiness is, “all things in moderation and to savor the moment when you have it.” Have fun this spring, spend that tax return wisely, and remember to enjoy the journey. Q

may 2016 | issue 255 | gaysaltlake.com

the bookworm sez The Battle for Room 314

by Ed Boland c.2016, Grand Central $26.00 243 pages REVIEW BY TERRI SCHLICHENMEYER

What was the name of your favorite teacher?

Even after all these years, you still remember the smell of chalk, the sound of her reading aloud, the way he pulled ideas from your head or music from your fingers. That teacher changed your life, and “The Battle for Room 314” by Ed Boland, you’ll get a view of today’s classroom – one you’ll barely recognize.

What was a nice, educated gay man doing in a snarling pit of teenage attitude?

With sweaty palms and a worthless planner, newly-minted teacher Ed Boland wondered that himself. Inspired by teachers in his family, he’d given up a well-paying job to teach but the ninth-grade class he’d gotten wasn’t what he bargained for.

Because Boland had spent a year teaching English in China , he figured he had a “leg up” on a job at Manhattan ’s Union Street School , “a new combined middle and high school” that focused on history and international studies. Teaching there, he’d been led to believe, was a dream job and, since he’d already worked with “promising” but disadvantaged New Yorkarea minority students through Project Advance, he thought he knew the kind of fresh-faced students he’d have.

Instead, what he found in the classroom that fall were sullen, attitudinal, sometimes violent young adults, many (if not most) of whom were

dealing with absentee parents, drug abuse, poverty, pregnancy, and bullying. Some of his new ninth-grade students were in their very late teens; many were unable to write in complete sentences or do age-appropriate schoolwork. At least one barely spoke English.

And yet, with a Hollywoodhappy ending on his mind, Boland persevered. He hoped to connect with the kids, though they were often uncontrollable.

He dreamed they would eventually learn something, though they usually ignored his lessons.

And when the year was over, he had considered staying at Union Street but he just couldn’t.

“I so wish it were a different ending for me and for the kids,” says Boland, “but some stories have to end like a seventies movie – gritty, real, and sad.”

The solution to the country’s school- and grade-based issues, says author Ed Boland, is a multi-faceted one, beginning with more education for the educators. There are other fixes, too, and “The Battle for Room 314” offers them.

But that’s not all: Boland, overall, tells a story that’s both shocking and unsurprising; part To Sir, With Love and part battlefield skirmish. There are occasional moments of too much information (both personal and classroom) but even more of frustration and missed opportunity (again, on two levels). What Boland shares left me feeling glum, mostly, but there are shadows of hope in this book – especially at the end, when he wraps up his story with a chapter of follow-ups.

Though you should be reminded that it’s representative of one man’s experience in one school, this book offers hard lessons. Still, if you’ve ever fretted about the state of education – on either side of the teacher’s desk – “The Battle for Room 314” goes to the head of the class. Q

BOOKS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 41

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42 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | MUSIC

gaysaltlake.com | issue 255 | may 2016

hear me out

GWEN STEFANI, THIS IS WHAT THE TRUTH FEELS LIKE Poor Gwen Stefani, all heartbroken on “Used to Love You,” the launch single from her long-delayed album that set the stage for what seemed like a return to the rawness of her No Doubt days. Uncertainty and sadness and the rebuilding of her self-confidence – in just four minutes, the not-a-Hollabackgirl’s face scaled the full scope of emojis. In fact, the single and its understated video said more than the album that would

follow a few months later. No, This Is What the Truth Feels Like isn’t the breakup confessional it wants you to think it is, and its truth-telling is only pop-star real, guised by indistinguishable trend chasers. With so few inspired offerings in its factory of store-bought Top 40 beats (among them, yes, a Gwen rap), what’s good? Gwen and her moxie are on the mend thanks to Blake Shelton, her current beau, so there’s that. She sings about it on the enjoyable “Make Me Like You,” gushing like a little girl smacked by love’s newness over a dizzying disco skate sound. In places, her feelings are raw and real. This is true of “Used to Love You,” which channels vulnerability and anger-turned-defiance into a seam-busting chorus that turns a literal twinkle into a typhoon of woeful dramatics. Greg Kurstin produces the folk-pop stargazer

NICE BITES

239 S 500 E 8 0 1- 3 6 4 - 4 6 5 5 RY E S LC.COM

“Rare,” which refreshingly flavors the album’s predictable fare with some much-needed acousticguitar-assisted rawness before it reaches a dreamy Kylie-esque chorus wherein Gwen confesses she’s “broken and insecure” and feels “worthless.” It’s the same kind of messy authenticity you wish was mirrored in more of this music. GRADE: C

been included on a Best Of; the song is right within Raitt’s bluesy ’90s-era wheelhouse, and that chorus and its key change – during which she pleads “I would’ve run, but I couldn’t run; I would’ve flown, but I couldn’t fly” – is golden. All of Dig in Deep, though, calls for repeated plays, unraveling its lyrical truths layer by layer and doing the blues as only Bonnie Raitt can. GRADE: B+

ZAYN, MIND OF MINE

BONNIE RAITT, DIG IN DEEP Imagine if Bonnie Raitt sang Donald Trump’s tweets. The point is, Bonnie Raitt can make the ugliest things beautiful. And for the last four decades, the Rock and Roll Hall of Famer’s soulful rasp has done just that, turning sadness into catharsis, all the while demonstrating such impressive and seemingly effortless guitar skills she could nail performances in her sleep.

And because, yes, good things happen in this world too, she has a new album out. Cue the heartbreak, right? On “The Ones We Couldn’t Be,” a ballad you listen to with the lights out, Raitt’s voice is Namaste for the soul, working over the delicate keys slowly, soothingly, resting in just the right places, aching with just the right amount of ache. It’s a perfect ballad, but of course it is: Raitt knows her way around a tearjerker just as we know deep breaths and thinking happy thoughts won’t block the pain of a Bonnie ballad (you’re still recovering from Raitt’s 1991 Grammy winner “I Can’t Make You Love Me” and you know it). “I Knew” is good because it sounds like it should have already

Ex-One Direction member Zayn Malik is damning his boy-band days with an act of rebellion that’s apparently indicative of adulthood: random caps. Though the 23-year-old’s solo debut goes to extremes to cut the 1D cord (like Cher, he calls himself, simply, Zahn), thankfully it’s far less contrived than his grammar riot suggests. “rEaR vIeW” builds into a warm, electro looped, vibing with a Frank Ocean-meetsMiguel chicness that masks any traces of boy-banding. But it’s Malik’s falsetto, offering plenty of coo-y eargasms, that’s the most potent potion on Mind of Mine. Mmmmm. Let freedom ring.

K. MICHELLE, MORE ISSUES THAN VOGUE “Can I get back the f*cks that I gave you?” R&B’s song slayer K. Michelle knows she can’t, but she can do the next best thing: Give even less of them now.

Leaving no shade unshaded, the reality star puts it all on the line on her third album, blasting “all kinds of hos” on the guitartickled rap “Mindful.” Even juicier is “These Men,” when she gives a good tongue-lashing to the sleazy cheats in her life – over a sweet, swaying girl-group groove, naturally. It’s true: K’s out for blood (she even compares herself to Uma Thurman in Kill Bill), and throughout More Issues Than Vogue, her greatest weapon is her voice.

Chris Azzopardi is the editor of Q Syndicate, and.chris-azzopardi.com.

DINING GUIDE | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 43

may 2016 | issue 255 | gaysaltlake.com

DINING GUIDE

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44 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | Q&A

King Tituss ‘Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt’ actor on being out, Tina Fey pushing his limits and that ‘ode to black penis’

BY CHRIS AZZOPARDI

The Internet

loves a good penis pun.

One of 2015’s biggest breakout stars, Tituss Burgess, discovered this fact last year, when the Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt actor’s already-escalating showbiz profile reached new heights thanks to a song he sang called “Peeno Noir: An Ode to Black Penis.”

So Burgess can retire now, right?

“Oh no, I’m just getting started,” says Burgess, who originated “Sebastian the Crab” in the musical version of The Little Mermaid. “There are so many races to love on!”

Not to mention, there’s also the second – and hopefully third, fourth and eighth – season of Netflix’s Unbreakable. The 37-year-old plays Titus (a variation on his real name, with just one “s”), an aspiring and very gay Broadway performer who lives with an unworldly doomsdaycult survivor named Kimmy (Ellie Kemper).

But back to that penis song…

What was it like seeing “Peeno Noir” take off the way it did? I don’t know that I gave it as much thought or attention as attention was paid to it, and that’d be the honest truth. I mean, obviously I paid attention because I launched my own line of Pinot Noir (called “Pinot

by Tituss”), but it was lovely to know that people thought it was funny and had taken ownership of it, but it’s become something other than what it initially was. People recite those words and tell me that their office breaks out into it just as release – no one’s thinking about what it actually meant – so it’s taken on a life of its own separate from the show. But it’s awesome and I love it, and I hope they find something as equally exciting and satisfying about this season as they did last season.

We get to learn more about Titus’s “straight life” this season. Who were you during your straight life? Gay! (Laughs) Honestly, I had a formal conversation with my mom when I was 19, but I don’t know that I was ever in the closet, if I’m being perfectly honest. I never had the “I have to tell the world” mindset.

How much of the character is you? I’m gonna be honest with you: very little. We share a similar wicked sense of humor and we both, of course, love musical theater and Diana Ross, but my energy lives a lot lower to the ground than his does and I don’t yearn for the spotlight the way he does.

The fact is, I really, really enjoy my alone time,

gaysaltlake.com | issue 255 | may 2016

so I don’t crave that the way my character does. In fact, by the time we’re done filming the season, I’m quite exhausted. He requires such a high level of vibration, and so by the time it’s done, I’m happy to hang him up for a few months.

Titus’s breakthrough moment this season involves him in geisha garb. I’m just waiting to hear what the critics have to say about that. Oooh lord. When I read that script I thought, “Jesus. Last year it was the wolf (Jacqueline, who is “American Indian,” unleashed a primal howl during the finale); this year it’s gonna be the geisha.”

How prepared are you for any backlash? Oh, I’m prepared.

I’ve had six months to prep for the harsh criticism. The thing about [creators] Tina [Fey] and Robert [Carlock] is, they don’t shy away from the current climate of the country, and while on a surface level it might seem like

Q&A | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 45

may 2016 | issue 255 | gaysaltlake.com

they’re giving these silly stereotypes a platform, I think it’s just sort of exacerbating what we have become so sensitive to. But if it’s a headline, my friend, it is fair game.

Tina and Robert are two of the most informed people I’ve ever met, and sometimes we get scripts and I think, “Surely this has not happened somewhere,” or, “Surely this is something that they’ve made up.” So I’ll get on the Internet and there it is. The transracial storyline – people feeling as though as they remember past lives – when I read these headlines, it’s funny because it’s so unbelievable. So yeah, it’s a fine line, but they treat it with great sensitivity and great class – and it is, after all, a comedy.

Are there ever times where you’re like, “Tina, no, no – too far.” Yeah – the geisha episode! I didn’t wanna do it.

What were you hesitant about? I’m in white face, man! I didn’t want anyone to think I was disrespecting a culture. But what we did was make certain that, while it’s funny, he’s extremely sin-

cere about what has happened to him. He’s for real, and as long as he’s for real in his interpretation and his acknowledgement of his past lives then it’s not offensive.

There’s something oddly touching about the end of that episode, and I think it also serves a greater storyline, which is, Titus has finally taken the initiative to take control of his career. No one else is giving him a job, so he wrote one for himself, so that is what’s smart about it.

What do you think when people call Titus a stereotype? I think they didn’t see the same show that I filmed. Titus is more everyman than Jacqueline, Kimmy or Lillian. He’s broke, he can’t afford to pay his rent, he’s chasing this career that has not materialized, he has trouble in relationships, at least last season, and he is not a size 32 in the waist. He gets rejected when he attempts to do something good with his life, even if it’s one of his bizarre “this is gonna make me famous” excursions.

Most Americans are living lives unfulfilled.

Most Americans don’t have the money that Jacqueline has. Most Americans, especially

black people, don’t get away with committing murder like Lillian did. So they’re not paying attention, that’s what I think.

Your performance of Diana Ross’s “Believe in Yourself” while accepting the Human Rights Campaign’s Visibility Award late last year was so moving.

Why is being out and visible important to you? Honey, how much time do you have? (Laughs) I know what dark places feel like and I know what the absence of love and community feels like, and if I had a me when I was growing up to see, I would have perhaps been familiar to you guys a lot sooner than two years ago. For that reason, I don’t want any young person or any old person to not acknowledge who they came into the world being through all of their past lives. This current one that you’re experiencing is one that should be fully realized — otherwise, you are the walking dead and what is the point? Q Chris Azzopardi is the editor of Q Syndicate. He once made Jane Fonda cry. Reach him via his website at www.chrisazzopardi.com and on Twitter (@chrisazzopardi).

46 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | COMICS

gaysaltlake.com | issue 255 | may 2016

anagram AN ANAGRAM IS A WORD OR PHRASE THAT CAN BE MADE USING THE LETTERS FROM ANOTHER WORD OR PHRASE. REARRANGE THE LETTERS BELOW TO ANSWER: HINT: SNUBBED ROCK

RAN AN AGENCY

_____ ______

cryptogram A CRYPTOGRAM IS A PUZZLE WHERE ONE LETTER IN THE PUZZLE IS SUBSTITUTED WITH ANOTHER. FOR EXAMPLE: ECOLVGNCYXW YCR EQYIIRZNBZN YZU PSZ! HAS THE SOLUTION: CRYPTOGRAMS ARE CHALLENGING AND FUN! IN THE ABOVE EXAMPLE ES ARE ALL REPLACED

BY CS. THE PUZZLE IS SOLVED BY RECOGNIZING LETTER PATTERNS IN WORDS AND SUCCESSIVELY SUBSTITUTING LETTERS UNTIL THE SOLUTION IS REACHED. THIS WEEK’S HINT: U=I

U IFKP DOLCM, UOEULODOP, EFPFCBUOFE PN IUOE D GDM NQP. PTFO PTF KNOFKUOFWW WFPPKFE UO. _ ____ _____, _________, __________ __ ____ _

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may 2016 | issue 255 | gaysaltlake.com

COMICS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 47

48 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | QMMUNITY

Qmmunity Groups SALT LAKE GOODTIME BOWLING LEAGUE FALL THROUGH WINTER LEAGUES ALL BOWLERS WELCOME CHARITY FUNDRAISING

INFO AT bit.ly/slgoodtime

Men Who Move .org The free social group for 18+ year-old gay, bisexual and transgender men in the Salt Lake area.

We are looking for a few good men!

Men who enjoy being naked in social, nonsexual settings.

We have nude lunches, retreats, campouts, house parties, sporting events, wine tastings, game parties, etc.

umen.org

gaysaltlake.com | issue 255 | may 2016

ALCOHOL & DRUG

HEALTH & HIV

RELIGIOUS

Alcoholics Anonymous 801-484-7871  utahaa.org Gay and Lesbianspecific meetings: Sunday 3p Acceptance Group, UPC, 255 E 400 S Monday 8p Gay Men’s Stag (Big Book Study), UPC, 255 E 400 S 8p G/Q Women’s Meeting, Disability Law Center (rear door), 205 N 400 W Tuesday 8p Live and Let Live, Disability Law Center (rear door), 205 N 400 W Wednesday 7p Sober Today, 375 Harrison Blvd, Ogden Friday 8p Stonewall Group, UPC Crystal Meth Anon  crystalmeth.org

Northern Utah HIV/ AIDS Project Walk-Ins Tues Noon–5pm 536 24th St, Ste 2B, Ogden 801-393-4153 Planned Parenthood 654 S 900 E 800-230-PLAN Salt Lake Valley Health Dept HIV/STD Clinic 610 S 200 E 801-534-4666 Utah AIDS Foundation  utahaids.org * mail@utahaids.org 1408 S 1100 E 801-487-2323

Deeksha Utah  deekshautah. wordpress.com First Baptist Church  firstbaptist-slc.org * office@firstbaptistslc.org 777 S 1300 E 801-582-4921 11a Sundays Sacred Light of Christ  slcchurch.org 823 S 600 E 801-595-0052 11a Sundays Wasatch Metropolitan Community Church  wasatchmcc.org 801-889-8764 Sundays, 11a at UPC

BUSINESS

LGBTQ-Affirmative Psycho-therapists Guild of Utah  lgbtqtherapists.com * jim@lgbtqtherapists.com Utah Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce  utahgaychamber.com * info@utahgaychamber.com Vest Pocket Business Coalition  vestpocket.org 801-596-8977 DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-7233 YWCA of Salt Lake  ywca.org/saltlakecity 322 E 300 S 801-537-8600

HOMELESS SVCS

SOCIAL

Volunteers of America Homeless Youth Resource Center, ages 15–21 655 S State St 801-364-0744 Young Men’s Transition Home 801-433-1713 Young Women’s Transition Home 801-359-5545

1 to 5 Club (bisexual)  bit.ly/1to5club Alternative Garden Club  bit.ly/altgarden * altgardenclub@ gmail.com blackBOOTS Kink/BDSM * blackbootsSLC@ aol.com Get Outside Utah  bit.ly/GetOutsideUtah Men Who Move  menwhomove.org OUTreach Resource Centers  outreachresourcecenters.org Ogden - 705 23rd St Weds, 3-7:30pm Logan - 596 E 900 N Fri, 4:30-7:30pm Brigham City - 435 E 700 S - First Tuesdays, 4-7pm Clearfield - 782 E 700 S - Thurs, 5:307:30pm 801-686-4528

POLITICAL

Equality Utah  equalityutah.org * info@equalityutah.org 175 W 200 S, Ste 1004 801-355-3479 Utah Libertarian Party 6885 S State St #200 888-957-8824 Utah Log Cabin Republicans  bit.ly/logcabinutah 801-657-9611 Utah Stonewall Democrats  utahstonewalldemocrats.org

Embracing the health & resilience of our community

qVinum Wine Tasting  qvinum.com Rainbow Classic Car Don R. Austin 801-485-9225 Sage Utah  facebook.com/sageutah  sageutah@ utahpridecenter.org 801-539-8800 Temple Squares Square Dance Club  templesquares.org Weekly dances Thursdays 7p at UPC 801-449-1293 Utah Bears  utahbears.com  info@utahbears.com Weds 6pm Raw Bean Coffee, 611 W Temple Utah Male Naturists  umen.org  info@umen.org Utah Pride Center  utahpridecenter.org  thecenter@ utahpridecenter.org 255 E 400 S 801-539-8800 SPORTS

Lambda Hiking Club  gayhike.org Pride Community Softball League  prideleague.com  pcsl@prideleague.com Q Kickball League  qkickball.com Sundays, 10:30, 11:30, Sunnyside Park QUAC – Queer Utah Aquatic Club  quacquac.org  questions@ quacquac.org Salt Lake Goodtime Bowling League  bit.ly/slgoodtime

Stonewall Shooting Sports of Utah  fb.me/stonewall. sportsofutah YOUTH/COLLEGE

Gay-Straight Alliance Network  gsanetwork.org Salt Lake Community College Equality Involvement Club 8 facebook.com/ slcc.equality University of Utah LGBT Resource Center 8 lgbt.utah.edu 200 S Central Campus Dr Rm 409 801-587-7973 Univ. of Utah Queer Student Union utahqsu@gmail.com USGA at BYU  byuusga. wordpress.com  fb.co/UsgaAtByu Utah State Univ.

Access & Diversity Ctr  usu.edu/ accesscenter/lgbtqa Utah Valley Univ Spectrum  discord.me/ spectrumatuvu  facebook.com/ groups/uvuspectrum Weber State Univ Faculty/Staff GayStraight Alliance  organizations. weber.edu/fsgsa  fsgsa@weber.edu Weber State University LGBT Resource Center  weber.edu/ lgbtresourcecenter 3885 W Campus Dr, Student Services Ctr, Suite 154 Dept. 2125 801-626-7271

GAY WRITES | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 49

may 2016 | issue 255 | gaysaltlake.com

gay writes

Egg sandwiches

BY DOUG WOODALL

I hated

my mom’s egg sandwiches.

When I found one in my lunch sack, I left it where it was. On my way home, I stopped at the back fence and hid it in the bushes. By doing this, I know I loved my mom. How could something my mom made for me — something I hated — show me that I loved my mom?

To understand what I’m saying, you need to know I was a troublemaker at school. All my shenanigans started with two thoughts I had about my first-grade teacher. One day, I looked at her and said to myself, “What makes her think she can tell me what to do?”

Then I said to myself, “I didn’t sign up for this.”

I didn’t cause any problems in first grade. I waited until I was in second grade. One day, the first recess ended and everyone lined up at the door to wait for our teacher to escort us to our classroom. While we waited, a boy who kept irritating me that morning butted in front of me. I told him to go to the back of the line. He refused. I said, “If you don’t go to the back of the line, I’m going home.” The boy didn’t budge, and I headed for the back gate. My teacher called my name and told me to come back over and over again, until I was through the gate and out of her sight.

One time when all the sixthgrade classes were at recess, I got a friend to go with me to one of the fifth-grade classes to knock on the window and run away. We kept this up until the teacher came out and confronted us. She told us we had to go into her class and apologize. I told her I couldn’t do that because I wasn’t sorry.

She wanted to know who was my teacher. Without flinching, I pointed to my teacher and said, “She’s right there.”

My teacher told me I had to go into the class to apologize or she’d take me to the office and call my mother. I said, “Call my mom.”

Between leaving school to go home in the second grade and knocking on the window of a fifth-grade classroom, I broke many rules and committed some crimes. I’ll admit to every one. Also, I was accused of doing some things I didn’t do. I did not start the fire in the third-grade boys’ restroom.

I’d like to tell you more of my stories, but now it’s time to tell you how getting in trouble at school and hiding my mom’s egg sandwiches in the bushes had shown me I loved my mom.

When I talk about my mom’s egg sandwiches, I’m not talking about egg salad. Instead, my mom took two slices of bread, slathered each slice with mayo, and slapped on an over-hard egg. She made lunches about seven in the morning.

Before I opened my lunch sack at noon, I could smell my egg sandwich. Since I never ate one, I can only imagine what it felt like to bite into a cold egg covered in mayo, chew it, and get it to slide down my throat.

Just imagining it makes me feel a little sick.

As I told you, when I found I had an egg sandwich, I left it in the sack. Because all my sack lunches included something in Tupperware or another reusable container, I couldn’t throw my sack away. So, on my way home, I stopped at the back fence, which separated the schoolyard from a church, got on my knees, and pushed my sandwich into the bushes that were on the church’s side.

I couldn’t take my sandwich home. I couldn’t tell my mom not to make me egg sandwiches. Why? Because I thought it’d hurt her feelings, and I couldn’t do that.

In second grade, I could cut the line and go home. When I walked through the door, I had no problem telling my mom, “I’ve had it. I’m never going to school, again.” At least, I didn’t go back to school that day. In sixth grade, I could follow my teacher to the office, listen to her tell my mom what I did and how I wouldn’t apologize, and take the phone to talk to my mom without my heart rate increasing by one beat. The one thing I couldn’t do was hurt my mom’s feelings.

You might say my shenanigans must have upset

my mom. I can see that now, but I couldn’t see that when I was in school. To my way of thinking, my shenanigans were directed at other students, at my teacher, or at the school system. They weren’t directed at my mom; therefore, I wasn’t hurting her.

Not eating my mom’s egg sandwiches or having her find out I didn’t eat them was different. That would have been a direct attack. I couldn’t even tell my mom not to make egg sandwiches for me.

Now you know how my mom’s egg sandwiches tell me I loved my mom. Q Gay Writes is a DiverseCity Series writing group, a program of SLCC’s Community Writing Center. The group meets the 2nd and 4th Monday of each month, 6:30-8pm, 210 E. 400 South, Ste. 8, Salt Lake.

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50 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | PETS

gaysaltlake.com | issue 255 | may 2016

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POSITIVE THOUGHTS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 51

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52 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | A&E

gaysaltlake.com | issue 255 | may 2016

q scopes MAY

BY SAM KELLEY-MILLS ARIES March 20–April 19 The insanely busy times will leave you breathless and satisfied. Pressure builds between friends and, when it blows, will seem strangely invigorating. Though conflict is common in life, it often comes when least expected. Take a moment to determine where key friendships go from here. The future is delightfully uncertain now.

American Horror Story ACROSS

1 Put a head on cappuccino 6 A man named Connie.

10 DeGeneres voice role 14 Sinister-looking Peter 15 Pertaining to most students 16 Sherman Hemsley religious sitcom 17 *She played Amazon Eve 19 k.d. lang record label 20 Feeling of hitting rock bottom 21 Haul ass 22 Thomas of “That Girl” 23 Trick 24 *Sarah, who played Billie Dean Howard 26 Anne Frank account 29 Producers of rainbows 31 Man ___ Mancha 32 Atmospheric prefix 33 Place for a light meal 38 *He played Will Drake 41 It helps you go up and down with your partner 42 Fruitcake 43 Shakespeare’s foot 44 Big-top employee 46 Do a facial in a porn film, e.g.

47 *Quinton, who play

Chad Warwick 51 Part of YSL 53 One that lies on the bottom 54 Hangout for Natalie Barney 56 The Advocate, briefly 59 Village People’s “In the ___” 60 *He played Larry Harvey 62 Frasier’s response to a client 63 Lodge members 64 Beat off 65 Game groups, to Mauresmo 66 “___ first you don’t succeed ...”

67 Come together

DOWN 1 Killed, to King James 2 Mower brand 3 Canal traveled by New York ferries 4 Boat with a pair of bears 5 Pathetically small 6 Robin’s gay guys 7 Edison’s middle name 8 Lab primates 9 Family 10 Like a pair of orifices 11 Eastern positions 12 Tennessee Williams’ lover Frank 13 “There’s a single runner” to Billy Bean 18 The Name of the Rose writer

22 Area of the boys in the band 23 Asks for it on one’s knees 25 Chance to get a hit 26 _Before Stonewall_ and others 27 “___ Walked Into My Life” (Mame) 28 Protected, to seamen 30 Cara of _Fame_ 32 Nobelist Sadat 34 Bounds gaily 35 Peter the Great, e.g.

36 Caesar’s city 37 “Walk __” (Warwick hit) 39 Patronize, as a Rubicon restaurant 40 Roster for those who may be really hung?

45 Threesome member, with “me” and “I”?

46 Frida Kahlo’s woman 47 Pueblo builders 48 Bring down 49 Want thy neighbor’s ass, for example 50 Sean of Will & Grace 52 Your, to Proust 55 “Diana” singer 56 Alec of _Desperate Housewives_ 57 Deity on _Xena_ 58 Gets hard 60 Opus ___ (The Da Vinci Code group) 61 Line of Todd Oldham dresses?

ANSWERS ON PAGE 54

individuals who care, those who know the real you.

SCORPIO Oct. 23–Nov. 21 Defy odds and seek out learning opportunities. Do not invite danger, but simply re-exam the limitations you have placed for yourself. The road less traveled may turn out to be the easier path to follow right now. Take a chance and get involved with some new groups. The associates who matter will always be there for you.

TAURUS Apr 20–May 20 While there are no guarantees in life, focus on established truths to provide comfort during a rough time. Many changes at home or work comes fast and loose, which is not preferred. Don’t face challenges alone if possible, and try to be flexible when dealing with others. Enjoyable times will come when reality seems twisted.

SAGITTARIUS Nov. 22–December 20.

Striving for perfection will only lead to higher recognition of meaningless flaws. A person of interest isn’t perfect, but have the most to offer in matters of the love. Give in to temptation and allow the heart of enjoy some passion. Losing the ability to feel is a real possibility right now, so take action to avoid it. Deep love is the best kind.

GEMINI May 21–June 20 A moment will come when you decide someone is too much effort to deal with. Do not fear letting go for a while. If this person really means something, reconnection will happen.

Otherwise, enjoy the freedom and independence. A long forgotten passion will re-emerge in the form of a lover, game, or pastime. Have fun, Gemini!

CAPRICORN Dec 21–Jan 19 You will find friends in strangers, and strangers in friends during this time. A mild crisis in life can reveal the true nature of those around you. Take solace in the fact that something slippery is not meant to be held tight, but simply stroked. Attachment is healthy if the end result is something pleasurable. Be adaptable and flexible.

CANCER June 21–July 22 The road to happiness can be a solitary one, and one you must travel. Through the good times, there have been annoyances in the form of obligation. Spend time alone and work out priorities. A friend will ask for favors. Don’t get drawn into a dramatic situation. While helping isn’t completely discouraged, it should be truly limited.

AQUARIUS Jan. 20–Feb. 18 Work will start to seem dull, leading to the desire to find a new career. Tread carefully in this quest, and explore all possibilities. Enlisting is easy, but commitment is hard. Don’t jump until you are ready. What matters is making time for friends and family, so take that into consideration. A dream job may come at too high a cost.

LEO July 23–August 22 The rules you follow will seem to disappear as celebratory events become more common. Have a good time, but be aware that most everyone is doing his or her own thing. The best course of action is to do the same, and stop worrying about everyone else.

While being a leader is second nature, it will feel good to let go sometimes.

PISCES Feb 19–Mar 19 The battle between thoughts and emotion is not something everyone understands. The warmth of dependency is easy to crave, but not always easily satisfied. Indulge lightly in the company of others, but be sure you feel good on your own first. Placing trust in others feels unwise, and with good reason. Betrayal is possible right now. Q

VIRGO August 23–Sep. 22 The ability to feel satisfied is elusive right now. This is a time to check on your health and mental state.

Both have experienced some strain lately.

Go easy on cheap tricks, which provide temporary relief but rotten feelings in the long term. It’s not easy to strive for longterm goals, but baby steps could prove remarkable easy to take.

LIBRA Sept 23–October 22 The hardest part of being a mentor is teaching something you don’t understand. It may be necessary to send friends or loved ones on their own path, and guide only when things get a little rough. There could be instances where work and family life don’t seem to balance. Cater to

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SERVICE GUIDE | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 53

may 2016 | issue 255

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54 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | HIV/AIDS

gaysaltlake.com | issue 255 | may 2016

positive thoughts

Why we need to raise HIV/AIDS awareness among young people

BY ORIOL R. GUTIERREZ JR.

I was 22

years old when I was diagnosed with HIV in 1992. I have now been living with the virus longer than I did without it. I’m grateful for being alive and healthy, but I can’t say that I’m happy to have HIV. I want to believe that I’ll live long enough to see a cure for HIV, but in the meantime I live with it because I have no other choice.

After testing HIV positive, I was convinced that I wouldn’t even see my 30th birthday. As a young person, I thought that I was being denied something most of us growing up take for granted – dying old. My fear of dying young only grew worse in 1994 when my ex-boyfriend, the person who I believe gave me HIV, died. He was 30.

In 1996, effective HIV treatment finally became a reality. As more and more people began taking the new medications and living as a result, my fear slowly turned into hope. I had lived those first few years after testing HIV positive as if I wasn’t going to have a future. It actually took me a long while to get used to the idea again of growing old.

Much has changed in the HIV epidemic since the dark early days.

Treatments have improved. Despite getting diagnosed with HIV today, you can expect to live a virtually normal life span as long as you adhere to effective treatment. The research is advancing for a cure and a vaccine. New HIV cases are increasingly being prevented.

All that said, there remains much that isn’t better. Stigma and discrimination related to HIV are stubbornly resistant to change. Access to care and treatment remain out of reach for too many people living with the virus. Although HIV rates have declined, there are still up to 50,000 new cases each year — and that has been true for many years.

Unfortunately, one of the most disheartening truths about HIV is related to young people. Current estimates are that one in

four new HIV cases in the United States occur among people between ages 13 and 24 — and that 60 percent of these young people living with the virus don’t know they have it. That is just unacceptable.

To sound the alarm about HIV among young people, National Youth HIV/AIDS Awareness Day (NYHAAD) was created in 2013. Commemorated each year on April 10, NYHAAD seeks to educate the public about the impact of HIV/AIDS on

young people. The day also highlights the contributions of young people in the fight against the virus.

The organizer of NYHAAD is Advocates for Youth, a nonprofit that educates young people about reproductive and sexual health. Events will be held nationwide with support materials from the advocacy group. Local groups and individuals will host events at such places as high schools, colleges, churches and community centers.

Awareness day organizers this year are promoting the idea of a NYHAAD Bill of Rights, which asserts that young people should have certain rights and protections related to HIV/AIDS. The declaration has

five articles, which are listed below.

Article 1: The right to live free from oppression. Poverty, racism, homophobia and other forms of oppression all contribute to HIV risk and to quality of treatment and care.

Article 2: The right to education. Young people have a right to the education and skills they need to protect themselves from HIV. Article 3: The right to prevention. Young people have the right to condoms, HIV testing and medication needed to help prevent HIV, and have the right to confidential, affordable and accessible services.

Article 4: The right to treatment and care. Young people are at risk of not receiving medication regularly enough to have their viral load suppressed. We must ensure that all youth have access to accessible and affordable HIV treatment.

Article 5: The right to live without criminalization, discrimination and stigma. Young people living with HIV have the right to freedom and dignity. Laws that criminalize HIV are founded in ignorance and serve only to divert attention and resources from real strategies to end the epidemic.

Approximately 1,000 young people in the United States become HIV positive each month. Undoubtedly, many of these young people living with HIV are LGBT. As such, they need and deserve help from the LGBT community.

To find out how you can help, please go to YouthAIDSDay.org for more information. You can also get the latest NYHAAD updates by searching “National Youth HIV & AIDS Awareness Day” on Facebook or following @YouthAIDSDay on Twitter. Q Oriol R. Gutierrez Jr. is the editor-in-chief of POZ magazine and on Twitter @oriolgutierrez. This column is a project of Plus, Positively Aware, POZ, The Body, Q Syndicate and QSaltLake Magazine.

HEALTH | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 55

may 2016 | issue 255 | gaysaltlake.com

q health

When Healthy Eating Becomes Harmful

BY PETER STOKER

I recently

attended a presentation by Paige Smathers, RDN, CD where she talked about our relationship with food and how we equate thinness with being healthy. Paige is a registered dietician who owns her own nutritional consulting and counseling business. She introduced me to some new ways of thinking about our food relationship and I would like to share those.

I would like to present you with the idea of a disordered eating spectrum. This spectrum can be fluid and intertwined with our emotions.

The premise behind it is that everyone is somewhere on the spectrum that ranges from low food-anxiety to the opposite end of high-food anxiety. And somewhere in the middle was disordered eating, where you might be at risk for developing an eating disorder. Anxiety with food would be something similar to not eating a cookie because you’ll have to run to 60 minutes to compensate. Or drinking coffee and getting yellow teeth.

Paige began by having us think about what our personal relationship with food was; whether it was a good, bad, or neutral relationship. And then she gave us each a straw and said she was going to time us for one minute and to breathe through the straw without using our nose. After this minute was over she asked our thoughts. Many people said all they wanted to do was take a deep breath. One person said they were anxious about it. Ultimately she asked us how this would relate to dieting. She

said that when we restrict or deny ourselves something that is when we want it even more.

So we were denied air and all we wanted was more air.

Paige offered us eight points that could be identified as red flags that someone might be headed down the path to an eating disorder and other potentially harmful behaviors.

LOSS OF THE JOY OF EATING: When you no longer enjoy eating. It’s a chore just to eat something because of the anxiety or stress it causes you.

UNABLE TO SUSTAIN CHANGES YOU’VE MADE: The changes that you made are unrealistic (i.e. roasting a chicken on Sunday and eating it and only it for 7 days).

FEELING SHAME OR GUILT WITH EATING: You have negative self-talk when you eat. No matter what you’re eating.

YOU’RE HUNGRY ALL THE TIME: Cereal for breakfast, pretzel for lunch, and pasta for dinner may not be ideal.

YOU HAVE ‘CHEAT’ DAYS OR YOU ‘CHEAT’: You should not have to ‘cheat’ because that has a bad connotation connected and therefore your brain thinks you are doing something bad or wrong.

When in reality you’re just doing you.

YOUR ‘HEALTHY’ EATING IS RULED BY A STRICT SET OF RULES: Eating certain things at certain times of the day with no flexibility whatsoever.

FOOD DOMINATES THE MAJORITY OF YOUR THOUGHTS: Eating right does take some thought and

preparation; however, it should not consume your life.

You should not be thinking about what to make for dinner while eating breakfast.

YOU PUT NUTRITION ON A PEDESTAL: Nutrition overrules everything else in life. When you’re at a party restricting yourself from a piece of cake and shaming others for having a piece. Or vocally projecting your routine to others and making yourself seem better than them.

Ultimately the idea was to become more mindful and intuitive eaters. Eat when we’re hungry, when we’re at a party, when we’re having good (or bad) days. Don’t overthink

the idea of eating and what to eat at what time and how much and in what way. Just eat. Enjoy your food, enjoy the experience.

Julia Child once said; “Moderation in all things, including moderation.” You shouldn’t be moderating yourself so much that you have lost your own freedom to do what makes you happy.

If you are struggling with your relationship with food, please reach out to Paige by contacting her through her website paigesmarthersrd. com Q Opinions expressed are solely my own and do not express the views or opinions of my employer.

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56 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | PUBLIC SAFETY

gaysaltlake.com | issue 255 | may 2016

public safety Calling 911: The do’s, the don’ts, and the how to’s

BY RION PHILLIPS, SUPERVISOR AT VALLEY EMERGENCY COMMUNICATIONS CENTER

Most of

you will never find yourself in a position of requesting help from a 911 dispatcher for emergency assistance. However, if you do, there are several things you can do to get responders on scene as quickly as possible.

First, preparation is key. Be familiar with the area where you live, as well as the resources and agencies in your county.

Most people know which police or fire department serves their area, but how many know which dispatch center handles those agencies?

In Salt Lake County there are two primary 911 dispatch centers, as well as several other centers serving additional police and medical agencies. If you call 911, your call will be routed to one of these two centers based on your location. Depending on the initial information the call takers at those centers receive, they may keep the call in house or transfer it to another center. The time between your call being received and when responders arrive on scene is not significantly affected by the time it takes to gather this initial information and get you to the correct dispatch center.

It is important to be vigilant in knowing where you are when travelling. There is no more gutwrenching feeling than having someone call in desperate need of help and not be able to be easily found. Rest assured that there are technologies that, along with the knowledge of the dispatchers and responders, we will use to locate you as fast as possible, but the more information you give will help us get help to you even faster.

Second, you should know to expect once we know your

location and what’s going on the majority of the centers here in the Salt Lake valley use some type of protocol to gather information. Regardless of the protocol, all of the information we gather is used to determine priority, number or type of responders, as well as instructions we may need to give you to help until the responders arrive. The other important thing to note is that regardless of what race, age, sex, nationality, sexual orientation, etc., you will receive the same level of service. There should be no fear of calling any law enforcement agency to investigate a same-sex domestic violence case, no anxiety over calling for medical help if you are transgender, and certainly no hesitation to call for help if you are depressed or suicidal.

Every person in this line of work is here to help anyone who needs it.

Lastly, the most frequently encountered 911 situations are pocket dials. You may laugh at the thought of pocket dialing 911 and the embarrassment of an officer showing up to your home or work; however, this has turned into a real problem for us. It can be frustrating trying to explain to callers that we are in fact 911, we really did receive a call, and we are genuinely calling back to make sure everyone is okay.

In addition to the hundreds of pocket dials we receive daily, we receive hundreds more where someone has actually meant to dial 911 for something they have witnessed, and then hung up before we can answer. If you are ever waiting for someone to answer, it is most likely is because we have had a spike in calls, frequently due to some type of traffic

hazard, such as a mattress on the freeway, or an accident in a busy intersection. By no means am I saying to not call, just be patient with us while we triage sometimes upward of 30 calls per minute, to get to your phone call. I assure you we will answer and will get help to you as soon as possible. The fastest way for that to happen is to stay on the line, and not hang up and call again.

A great resource to help you in your pre-planning, especially locating non-emergency phone numbers you can use to keep the 911 lines free for emergency

calls is 911.utah.gov. 911 should only be used to save a life, stop a crime or report a fire. The majority of other calls can be handled through the non-emergency numbers. If you are unsure if you are having an emergency or not, err on the side of caution and call 911. Along with the nonemergency numbers for your local departments, 911.utah.gov has a lot of other information to help you be prepared.

If you are interested in exploring a career in 911 dispatching, please contact one of your local dispatch centers for more information. Q

In Memorium

Rion David Phillips 1984–2016

Beloved son of David Rich Phillips and Tracy Anne Phillips was born on a beautiful Memorial Day morning of May 28, 1984. It was a morning fit for bringing the angel that he is into the world. Rion died in a tragic motorcycle accident on April 7th and leaves behind his parents; loving brother Dru Rich Phillips; grandfather: Jay Brian Buzzo; aunts: Karin Christensen, Shannon Burrington, and Paige Norris; uncles: Michael (Kari) Phillips, Rocci Phillips, Kurt Buzzo, Troy (Carol) Buzzo; and many very special nieces, nephews and cousins – whom he loved and enjoyed spending time with. Rion also leaves behind an extraordinary and diverse group of friends who were also his close family.

Rion was a dispatch supervisor with Valley Emergency Communication Center. He was always about others before himself and made everyone feel important and loved. He taught everyone a great deal about love, empathy, and compassion. He truly understood what unconditional love was.

Rion’s motto was “be kind to one another” and he lived by that.

Rion’s love for serving others lead him to become a police officer. He served in this capacity with the South Jordan Police Department before returning to VECC. It was there that he developed a deep respect and admiration for all those in the line of service, to include police officers, firefighters, and military personnel. Rion wore his love for these brave men and women on his left arm displayed in a beautiful tattoo tribute he showed off with pride. He organized Sub-4-Santa events, and many fallen officer benefits. He worked tirelessly to make sure their families knew the community cared for and respected the officers who put their lives on the line every day to protect our communities.

Rion was the representative from VECC for the LGBT community and was actively involved in the committee. He just wrote an article that will be published in QSaltLake Magazine.

A campaign in Rion’s name for fallen officers is at gofundme.com/rionphillips

may 2016 | issue 255 | gaysaltlake.com

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VIEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 57

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58 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | HIV/AIDS

gaysaltlake.com | issue 255 | may 2016

the frivolist

7 ways social media has made you a sex addict

BY MIKEY ROX

Ten years

ago, when Facebook was in its infancy and iPhones were but a glimmer in Steve Jobs’ eyes, you had to work hard to be a perv. Now, fulfilling your friskiness is just a flick away, and that’s not exactly a good thing. Social media has taken over our lives, both personally and professionally, and the dark underbelly of our online world is as dank and seedy as a dimly lit bathhouse. As a result, you may very well be a sex addict; here are seven ways to find out.

1. DM ON TWITTER AND FACEBOOK HAS GOTTEN YOU IN TROUBLE WITH YOUR BOO What starts out as innocent “likes” and flirty comments on Facebook and Twitter soon evolves into a deep-see-diving expedition into the object of your burgeoning affection’s profile, left-swiping on the family and milestone photos but holding steady on the shirtless-vacay jackpot. Eventually one DMs the other in an attempt to push the boundaries of social-stranger etiquette — even though you know you shouldn’t — until a sordid relationship of sexts and sweet-nothings arises. Which is all well and good if it’s as innocuous as you say it is, but your partner doesn’t believe you when you get caught (as well he shouldn’t since you’re being dishonest), and therein lies your problem — likely one of many.

situation even sadder), ultimately ushering in a brief respite before ending up back at square one a few hours later.

content you have stored — it’s time to pull up your pants, put the devices away and introduce yourself to the real world again.

3. WHEN THERE’S A GRINDR OUTAGE YOU TURN TO SCRUFF

6. WE CAN ALL AGREE THAT SNAPCHAT EXISTS TO SHARE DICK PICS

Gay Twitter loses it collective mind when Grindr experiences an outage, like it did recently — at least on the West Coast (and during the Palm Springs White Party, no less) — driving hordes of Grindr loyalists to other apps like Scruff to fulfill their insatiable desires. If you find yourself in a cold sweat, clamoring to connect nakedly with somebody — _anybody!_ — nearby when the Grindr gods throw down the

2. YOU SPEND WAY TOO MUCH TIME ON GRINDR

gauntlet, it’s probably high-time for reflection… and confession.

Thanks to social media — and very specifically Grindr with regards to our gay community — most of us have developed not only a need but, more dastardly, an affinity for 375-feet-away validation and instant gratification. You open the app every 15 minutes to see if someone new has pinged you or, hopefully, that brick-bodied bro you’ve got your eye on has finally responded to your “Sup?” Friday and Saturday nights? Forget about it. What were once bastions of freedom and nightlife exploration have devolved into afternoon-to-evening-long sessions of sitting on the couch surfing headless thumbnails while Netflix plays in the background as you consistently turn down the so-sos and frequently get rejected or ignored by the more-sos.

It’s cyclical, and you can’t quit it — until you hit it, that is (and you’re almost always compromising, which makes the whole

4. YOU’RE REALLY ON INSTAGRAM FOR THE MAN-BUTTS You’re kidding yourself if you think you’re on Instagram for the sweeping views and vistas of other people’s getaways, pics of kittens and your BFF’s brunch plate. Real talk, you’re there to scroll through the endless images of the buffed-out, swoleup models and meatheads you daydream about tossing you around like a rag doll. If you follow @seductionboys, @themuscleleague or @datbubblebutt, you might be a sex addict.

5. YOU BOOKMARK YOUPORN MORE THAN ANY OTHER WEBSITE We all have a handful of super-hot vids saved that are our go-tos. But if you’ve got them bookmarked on your phone or computer so you can have them at the ready whenever you’re ready — and they outnumber the more relevant and G-rated

A friend of mine asked me a few months ago if I’m on Snapchat. My response? No, because I’m not a 17-year-old kid trying to sext undercover. I’m grown, and when I send you my dick pic you get to keep it forever — because I’m confident like that.

But I digress. My point that Snapchat is strictly for younger Millennials and highschoolers to trade nudies with no cyber

trail (even though that’s inaccurate) is proven by this appropriately worded statistic from research firm Martin-Wilbourn Partners: “Snapchat is now the third most popular social app among Millennials, with a 32.9 percent penetration on the demographic’s mobile phones, trailing only Instagram (43.1 percent) and Facebook (75.6 percent).”

SEEING BLACK7. YOU VISIT TUMBLR FOR CELEB NUDES AND HOMEMADE SEX TAPES Does anybody even understand Tumblr?

I don’t — except when I’m googling a celebrity’s junk or looking for amateur porn (because watching normal people do it as awkwardly as I do is comforting). That’s really all Tumblr is good for. Anybody who tries to tell you differently is either a liar or a 13-year-old girl, or probably both.

Mikey Rox is an award-winning journalist and LGBT lifestyle expert whose work has been published in more than 100 outlets across the world. He splits his time with his dog Jaxon. Connect with Mikey on Twitter @mikeyrox.

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60 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NIGHTLIFE

gaysaltlake.com | issue 255 | may 2016

princess kennedy

Where were you 20 years ago?

BY PRINCESS KENNEDY

What were

you up to 20 years ago? I had to think about it for a while; I was working for San Francisco Opera, and during the off season I would work in the cavernous costume warehouse cataloging thousands of costumes. It was one of those jobs that the longer you, took the longer you had the job. While my superior sat playing craze of ‘on-line poker’ I daydreamed over the Versace and Mackie gowns that littered the shop. I daydreamed of finding one that fit, but mostly pulled inspiration (and a couple hundred dollars worth of notions) to create my many club kid lewks.

I was the the new small-town kid in the big city. I was Gen X-ing, Ab-Fabing and Spice-Girling. I changed my hair color daily and lived for Tuesday night where I’d

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club until Wednesday morning at Trannyshack. I was young, gorgeous, wild as fuck, popular and mostly just dumb. Meanwhile two states over in my hometown was a change I wish I could have witnessed for myself, a change in a system that I was running away from.

The Royal Court of the Golden Spike Empire was something I couldn’t even say, not without a hiss. Without getting to much into it, I was crowned Miss Gay Pride Salt Lake City ’92 and had an unfortunate experience that left a sour taste in my mouth that sent me fleeing the organization, my title and anything that was associated with it, anywhere! The queens were cunty bitches and if I couldn’t be the prettiest and most popular then I wasn’t going to play!

Shortly after I left 20 years ago, unbeknownst to me, a friend from my teen years, Ralph Currington — aka Sheneka Christie — took the throne aside Peter Christie to make one of the most prolific reigns in the almost 40 years that the Court had existed.

Flash forward to 2010 when I rejoined the populace behind the Zion curtain. I came back with a bad taste in my mouth and found the tired scene being regurgitated to the masses, but it wasn’t long before I realized that above all the glitter and feathers is something that, in my misspent youth, was completely over my head: A small community of bighearted individuals that work tirelessly to give back to the community — actually, fuck that, they work tirelessly to give to the community!

I admit that I was 100 percent too self absorbed in my misspent youth to comprehend what the Court even did. I know, and will attest that to any outsider, that it may all seem like a bunch of trivial bullhockey, but unfortunately what we tend to see with the drama and infighting, well, it comes from mostly the new and endlessly flawed crop of new queens that come in with a chip on their shoulder from a damaged upbringing who have no social experience other than fighting with their siblings. Granted it makes for a great night at the Trapp, but let’s keep the greater good in mind.

When I asked the Christies what they

were most proud of in that reign of years ago, they agreed it was the education fund they set up. Imagine what they have done for over 20 people in the past who were given the gift of education. One thing that sucks from our generation (and earlier) was the lack of opportunity for many a talented lesbian or gay. We were still considered degenerates and no one really paid much attention to us, let alone show concern for our future.

“With the start of the Education Fund,” Peter said, “we have been able to give literally thousands of dollars to LGBT recipients to further their education.” Education is something obviously very important to Emperor Christie as his day job is director of education for Ballet West. Incidentally, spreading joy and philanthropy was the easy part of the year-long reign, the royal couple was also expected to fly around the country, mostly on their dime, being ambassadors for our state, at the same time when he was a Primo Ballerina for Ballet West. I can’t imagine which aged this silver fox faster?

When asked what all she was proud of the EF Sheneka didn’t have to think about the answer. The crown she designed that they still use to this day, the out-of-state friendships she’s foraged and held onto for many years, and the family she’s built out of it. Anyone will tell you if there is one person that has done more than any other it is Empress XXX, the mother of the court — long live Sheneka Christie. Now, honey, I ain’t one to gossip but we agreed that the one regret she had was some of her outfit choices. Alas, that’s another article.

The main regret for Peter was the hardship from his reign until now — the years our friends dropped like flies from the AIDS virus. “We’ve had to experience a prolific and grievous loss of many friends and colleagues over the year,” which at the end of the day is the cause for which the Court does the most good. So if you naysayers and eyerollers are part of the bareback/creampie set you might want to watch your Ps and Qs. Both agree that for the new queens discovering the RCGSE that it is fun and fierce and pretty, but you need to remember there is a human side that is bigger than even you.

Bravo to the Court, Congrats Your Royal Hineys, you made me find humility and respect!

For a fun trip down Salt Lake’s drag “hersory” and all the details of the Coronation XLI held over Memorial weekend, visit rcgse.org. Q

may 2016 | issue 255 | gaysaltlake.com

NIGHTLIFE | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 61

62 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FINAL WORD

gaysaltlake.com | issue 255 | may 2016

the perils of petunia pap smear

A tale of the stall of great peril

BY PETUNIA PAP SMEAR

assignation. However, that night of all nights, in full panic mode, I was overrode my baser instincts and let caution be my guide.

I feared that he might flush the throne containing my keys so I abandoned the twig idea and performed the stereotypical cruising move of circling back to the restroom, following him in. (Just like any self-respecting rest area cruising troll would.)

Indeed, my darkest fear came to fruition as he entered the “Stall of Great Power.” Now remember, it’s midnight at a rest area and this was in the 1980s when rest areas were known to host an excessive amount of cruising.

I think I scared the shit out of the stud when I rushed in behind him, touched him on the shoulder and pleaded, “Please don’t use this stall because I’ve dropped my keys in this one.”

His facial expression was a combination of disbelief and fright. After I directed him into the next stall, I remained there “casually” standing guard. I grew aware as I was waiting in the totally silent room that Mr. Stud was not making any sound at all.

If he was being bathroom shy we could nave been there all night. I remembered suddenly a chapter from “Miss Manners” stating that people like to poo in private.

PUZZLE SOLUTIONS

I retreated outside and finally found a suitable twig. On the way back in, I passed mister cutie exiting the facility. His facial expression had progressed to terror. Trying to prove I was legit, I showed him my stick. He broke into a run, leaving me alone with my stick. As I reentered the restroom, I heard his car tires squeal as he sped out of the parking lot.

It took five frustrating minutes of trial and error, and much muttering of swear words, before I fished the keys out.

This experience leaves us with several important questions: 1. How do you sanitize keys?

2. What kind of story is Mr. Stud going to be telling his friends?

3. I washed my hands until they were raw; do you think that is enough?

5. Should I develop and market a nail file fit for whittling branches?

6. Was it the carpel tunnel that caused me to drop the keys or a subconscious need for adventure?

7. Should Mattel develop a “Stud in the Stall” doll to play with Ken? These and other eternal questions shall be answered in future chapters of the Perils Of Petunia Pap Smear. Q

Cryptogram: “I FELT ANGRY, INDIGNANT, DETERMINED TO FIND A WAY OUT. THEN THE LONELINESS SETTLED IN.” 2 9 1 7 5 3 4 8 6 2 4 6 5 1 9 3 7 8

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the rapturous grandeur of a voluminous hoop skirt in full frill mode. Nonetheless, whoever designed them made the drain pipe too small to accommodate an adult male hand, even one not wearing Lee Press-on Nails. In hindsight, I have come to believe that this fact may help explain why public restrooms are so often wretchedly clogged.

This occasion really could have been a literal “Oh, Shit!” moment; luckily I had ceased performing bodily functions at “number one,” without proceeding on to “number two.” Sorry, those of you with a scat fetish will just have to be disappointed, however if you’re into water sports let the yellow bandanna proudly fly!

I exited the stall and searched for something to reach down into the toilet with and fish out the keys. Damn it, nothing usable was in sight. With my anxiety quickly rising, I went outside the building to try and find something useful. I saw some bushes behind the building. Excitedly, I remembered that in my Boy Scout days I learned to fashion a Dutch Oven pot grabber and a weenie roasting stick out of such bush branches. I started toward the bushes.

Just then a drop dead gorgeous 20-something guy with bulging muscles in all the right places started walking toward the restroom. Under normal circumstances my natural instinct would be to reverse my course and follow him into the restroom, hoping to catch his eye. Then with any luck, upon exiting the throne room, perhaps I could strike up some flirtatious banter with the Adonis, thereby getting his number, or better yet, arranging a discreet yet torrid

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to Logan is fraught with danger and excitement.

A few years ago I was returning to Logan from the Salt lake Men’s Choir concert. It was nearing midnight. I was tired and stopped at the Brigham City rest area.

Now, before your filthy minds dream up all sorts of images of lurid rest stop shenanigans, let me assure you that I really had to pee.

Now I’ve always been entertained, and I might add a little bit titillated, by the grafilthy that some adventurous “authors” compose on bathroom stall walls.

So given the choice, I usually elect to use a stall rather than a urinal, if only for the expanded literary opportunities.

On this particular occasion, the writers had been very prolific. Thus, I dare say that I tarried longer than the requisite three shakes and a zip, in order to read the “advertisements.”

Long story short: While fishing for toilet paper (that’s my story and I’m sticking to it) I lost hold of my car keys and, to my horror, they plopped straight into the toilet bowl.

I panicked. Dumbfounded, I stared into the filthy, disgusting toilet water for at least two minutes.

Finally, in frenzied desperation, with no other option in sight, I removed my opera length driving gloves, wrinkled up my nose and stuck my hand down in into the surprisingly icy cold, fetid, stinking water.

Let me make an obvious statement: Rest area thrones are not designed for a queen. I guess that I should not be surprised, as the privacy divides are never large enough to be able to facilitate

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