QSaltLake Magazine - December 2016 Issue by QSaltLake Magazine

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gaysaltlake.com | issue 262 | december 2016

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december 2016 | issue 262 | gaysaltlake.com

staffbox publisher/editor Michael Aaron

in this issue

copy editor Tony Hobday designer Christian Allred sales Craig Ogan national advertising representative: Rivendell Media, 212-242-6863, sales@rivendellmedia.com contributors Diane AndersonMinshall, Chris Azzopardi, Paul Berge, Jeff Berry, Dave Brousseau, Tyson Daley, Mikki Enoch, Jack Fertig, Greg Fox, Charles Lynn Frost, Oriol Gutierrez Jr., Tony Hobday, Christopher Katis, Princess Kennedy, Rock Magen, Sam Mills, Mikey Rox, Gregg Shapiro, Petunia Pap Smear, Steven Petrow, Ed Sikov, Peter Stoker, Marcy Taylor-Rizzi, Ben Williams, D’Anne Witkowski distribution Dave Chappell, Bradley

Jay Crookston publisher

49 33 World AIDS Day events

On the road to zero new HIV/AIDS cases, the decline has stalled. Local events to bring awareness.

Michael Buble On man crushes and male admirers.

NEWS ��10 Top news of the month Election results Robocall says McMullin is a gay man Utah Pride changes VIEWS ��16 What to do now the election is over Creep of the month: Log Cabin Republicans Not your dad’s holiday shopping list

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FEATURE ��24 Holiday Shopping Guide World AIDS Day FOOD & DRINK ��36 Meet Constancia de Campos de los Santos del Extra Extra Non-Virgin Olive Oil LIFESTYLE ��51 Surviving the holidays Pet of the month

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QSaltLake Magazine is a trademark of Salt Lick Publishing, LLC. Copyright © 2016, Salt Lick Publishing, LLC. All rights reserved. No material may be reprinted or reproduced without written permission from the publisher. 8–12,000 copies are distributed free of charge at over 300 locations across the Wasatch Front. Free copies are limited to one per person. For additional copies, call 801649-6663. It is a crime to destroy or dispose of current issues or otherwise interfere with the distribution of this magazine. Publication of the name or photograph of any individual or organization in articles or advertising in QSaltLake Magazine is not to be construed as any indication of the person’s sexual orientation or gender identity. Printed in the USA on recycled paper. Please recycle this copy when done.

Against

BY MICHAEL AARON

all convention wisdom, and against everything the pollsters told us, the Republican Party is not dead and a misogynist billionaire will likely be moving his gilded crap into the White House. This is not the outcome that was supposed to happen, and suddenly people around the country are up in arms. There is much fear, and there is much actual violence, in the country today for racial and ethnic minorities, trans and queer folks, and women in general. Yes, the election of Donald J. Trump has emboldened those who hate others and they are taking their victory lap. Worse, conservatives have also taken over the Senate and the House of Representatives, paving the way for decimation of much of what has been gained in the past eight years.

But, like most of us old-timers in the business of political action know, we’ve been through at least equally bad reigns of GOP power in the nation’s capitol. Yes, they were difficult times. We still, however, made progress. What we have today, though, is a changed world. The people of this country have moved in their opinions of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer folk. Our allies are very strongly for us and will defend us at every turn. What will happen over the next four years (oh, dear god, please make it only four years) will be a shift in the fabric of society. But it will also mean we will see where each end every person stands on some very basic principles — loyalty, compassion, honesty. This will be a time with those younger than the 50-plusers will need to take charge. No more is a world with equal rights simply handed to them without the work it will take to maintain them. Many are fearful of what will happen to those not strong enough to stand up to the hate. But many are willing to stand with them. Welcome to the fight. Q

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gaysaltlake.com | issue 262 | december 2016

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news The top things you should know happened last month (Full stories at gaysaltlake.com.)

Morbid curiosity wins out as Pulse tapes released A Florida circuit judge ordered Orlando City to release recordings of mass shooter Omar Mateen’s conversations with police during his standoff at the Pulse nightclub. Transcripts of the calls are already public, but the city withheld the recordings. More than two dozen media organizations sued the city for release. The recordings show a calm and intense Mateen who’s only motive seemed to be US Military Activity in the Middle East and pledges of loyalty to an Islamic State terrorist leader. He replied “My name is Islamic Soldier,” when asked his name. He also required the policeman to “tell America to stop bombing Syria and Iraq” which is said was killing innocents.

It’s not news, Shep’s Gay Shep’s not the 4th Stooge, that was Shemp, Fox News anchor Shepard Smith revealed he’s gay .Smith has rarely talked about his sexuality during his 20 years with Fox News. He refuted claims that ousted Fox Chair, Roger Ailes, wouldn’t let him be public about his sexual orientation. The 52 year old Smith is the Afternoon and Breaking News Anchor for the cable operation. He was named managing editor last year. Media observers

gaysaltlake.com | issue 262 | december 2016

believe Smith, with the new FNN president will be “the future of Fox News,” according to the Huffington post.

Turning’s law, some beg no pardons Men convicted of offenses prior to the 1967 decriminalization of Homosexual acts in England will be pardoned. 65,000 men were convicted of which 15,000 are still alive. The pardon has been dubbed “Turing’s Law” in reference to the wartime mathematician, Alan Turing, who cracked Nazi Germany’s “unbreakable” Enigma code. He was stripped of his job and chemically castrated after being convicted in 1952 for having sex with a man. He killed himself two years later at age 41. One man said he would not accept a pardon and wanted an apology. “To accept a pardon means you accept that you were guilty. I was not guilty of anything,” the man told BBC TV.

USA Backslides on STDs The U.S. is backsliding on progress against STDs, according to a new report from the U.S. Centers of Disease Control and Prevention. Rates of Chlamydia, gonorrhea and syphilis reached a nationwide high. There were 1.5 million cases of Chlamydia reported in 2015, a six percent increase from 2014. At 395,000 cases, gonorrhea is up 13 percent from 2014, and at 24,000 cases, syphilis is up 19 percent from 2014. Young people ages 15 to 24 make up about two-thirds of all chlamydia cases and half of all diagnoses for gonorrhea. Gay and bisexual men make up the majority of syphilis cases.

Calif. helmet law Proposition 60, called “The California Safer Sex in the

Adult Film Industry Act,” was turned down on election day. The proposition would require actors to wear condoms when shooting scenes of anal and vaginal sex.. There is a 2012 Los Angeles-law, Measure B, that requires condom use by LA County film makers The measure was pushed by Michael Weinstein of the AIDS Healthcare Foundation. It allowed porn viewers to sue if the performers didn’t use condoms and producers would be required to pay for performers’ STI prevention, screening, treatment costs and oversight by the health department.

Marriage equality goes down, down under Australia’s upper house of parliament defeated bill to hold a national vote on marriage equality Australia’s conservative government proposed a national vote on marriage equality, which is supported by 61% of Australians. The bill required the support of liberal Senators as the conservatives do not have a majority in the upper house. The Australian AttorneyGeneral had warned that a defeat would delay same sex marriage in Australia for years. The liberal Labor Party said a national campaign would have resulted in harmful debate against LGBT and seeks Parliamentary action on the issue. There have only been three plebiscites in Australian history, two relating to conscription during World War I, and one to choose a national song in 1977.

Honolulu smooch Honolulu City will pay $80,000 for a city police officer who harassed two women for kissing in public. The women sued in federal court in Hawaii alleging their

rights were violated when the officer told them to “take it somewhere else” and encouraged the store manager to issue trespass warnings. The two women and the officer got into a physical altercation. The women, visiting from California, were arrested for assault. The charges were later dropped. They had previously been paid a $10,000 settlement by the store in which the incident took place.

Social media documents violence “Capturing Hate”, a project to document violence against transgender people by the Brooklyn, NY based Witness Media Lab found 329 videos of physical assaults against transgender people posted on social media. They videos include: a transgender woman in seizure due to a beating in a Maryland McDonald’s, two transgender women are assaulted and stripped naked on an Atlanta MARTA train and a gay man in drag beaten in Washington, D.C. as bystanders cheer. The videos have been viewed over 89 million times, shared over 500,000 times and rated favorably by 99% of the people who viewed them. Major brand name businesses have advertising adjacent to the content and 39% of videos found on YouTube® were labeled as entertainment or comedy. Of the 230,000 comments, homophobic, trans-phobic and racist remarks dominate the comments.

december 2016 | issue 262 | gaysaltlake.com

NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 11

Trump is ‘fine’ with same-sex marriage ruling In his first television interview since becoming president-elect, Donald Trump said he does not think the Supreme Court needs to revisit the same-sex marriage issue, calling it “settled” and his feelings on it “irrelevant.” “It’s law. It was settled in the Supreme Court. It’s done,” Trump told Lesley Stahl on CBS’ 60 Minutes. “These cases have gone to the Supreme Court. They’ve been settled, and I’m fine with that.” His views run counter to the Republican Party platform, which states, “Traditional marriage and family, based on marriage between one man and one woman, is the foundation for a free society and has for millennia been entrusted with rearing children and instilling cultural values. We condemn the Supreme Court’s ruling in United States v. Windsor, which wrongly removed the ability of Congress to define marriage policy in federal law. We also condemn the Supreme Court’s lawless ruling in Obergefell v. Hodges, which in the words of the late Justice Antonin Scalia, was a ‘judicial Putsch’ — full of ‘silly extravagances’ — that reduced ‘the disciplined legal reasoning of John Marshall and Joseph Storey to the mystical aphorisms of a fortune cookie.’” On the campaign trail, Trump said he doesn’t favor same-sex marriage and urged social conservatives to “trust” him on the issue. Trump also said he’d “strongly consider” appointing justices to the U.S. Supreme Court who would reverse the decision for marriage equality. However, he said he doesn’t support the idea of a U.S. Constitutional amendment

banning same-sex marriage. During his speech at the Republican National Convention he pledged to protect LGBT people from a foreign ideology, which marked the first time a Republican presidential nominee mentioned LGBT people in a positive way during an acceptance speech. Critics pounced on Trump for making the remarks without supporting LGBT rights. Evan Wolfson, former president of the now closed LGBT group Freedom to Marry, said he’s “pleased to hear” Trump is “fine” with the Supreme Court ruling on marriage equality and believes the issue is settled law. “This is one of many chances he has — and must take — to show the American people that he has credibility and that the administration he is assembling and actions they are preparing are not a threat to their families, their rights, and their place in this country,” Wolfson told the Washington Blade. “Today he said the right thing, but actions speak louder than words — and as I wrote to Freedom to Marry’s supporters earlier this week, we must be as vigilant on this and the many other grave concerns his candidacy raised as we were in our successful and long work to win the freedom to marry in the court of public opinion and then the law.” Wolfson added the “true test of his integrity in this answer” will be Trump’s appointments to the judiciary and the president-elect’s refusal to “greenlight efforts by any in his administration to carve licenses to discriminate into the law he today says he respects.”Q

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gaysaltlake.com | issue 262 | december 2016

Election wrap-up Most would tell you that the election didn’t quite come down the way everyone thought. And we all know what happened nationally. Here are the preliminary local key results as they affect Utah’s LGBT community as of press time, Nov. 15. Final results will be available Nov. 22. Please note we are only showing candidates that received at least five percent of the vote.

Federal Races U.S. SENATOR The highest profile race facing this state’s LGBT community is, of course, the Misty Snow vs. Mike Lee race. Snow is the first openly trans woman in the country to run for the U.S. Senate as a major party’s nominee. While she did not displace incumbent Lee, she garnered over a quarter million votes from across the state. In fact, she nearly got as many votes as Hillary Clinton did in the presidential race. She ran a good, thoughtful campaign and brought issues to the table that have largely been ignored in this state, like raiding the minimum wage and legalizing marijuana. Equality Utah did not endorse in this race. MIKE LEE (R) 659,769 MISTY SNOW (D) 265,674

Statewide Races GOVERNOR LGBT ally Mike Weinholtz lost handily to incumbent Gov. Gary Herbert. While equality issues didn’t get raised much in debates, our community knows Weinholtz would be much better on our issues than Herbert has proven to be. Herbert’s Lt. Governor, however, has proven himself to be an ally over the years, especially in a speech he made after the Orlando Pulse massacre that was shared around the world in social media. Equality Utah did not endorse in this race. GARY HERBERT (R) 650,269 MIKE WEINHOLTZ (D) 265,674

ATTORNEY GENERAL Incumbent attorney general Sean Reyes has been a focal point in the battle for LGBT equality, but he won re-election at about the same rate as Gov. Herbert did. Democratic candidate Jon Harper dropped out of the race, but still grabbed just over 25 percent of the vote. Libertarian candi-

date W. Andrew McCullough hoped to grab Harper’s votes, but came up to only a 6.5 percent showing. Equality Utah did not endorse in this race. SEAN REYES (R) 623,634 JON V. HARPER (D) 242,779 W. ANDREW McCULLOUGH (L) 62,328

UTAH SENATE Luz Escamilla strongly held her seat in Senate District 1, which encompasses from the Fairgrounds neighborhood to the airport in Salt Lake City. Equality Utah endorsed Escamilla. LUZ ESCAMILLA (D) 10,316 FRED C JOHNSON (R) 7,500

UTAH HOUSE All candidates but one that were endorsed by Equality Utah this year ran either unopposed or won by over 60 percent of the vote, which was known early in the race. Even in District 32, with vehemently anti-gay incumbent LaVar Christensen against a Democratic challenger in an evenly divided district, party-wise, there was no endorsement by the political action committee. (See separate story below.) Only House District 34, Taylorsville, came remotely close with Karen Kwan up

against Macade Jensen. The seat was open and Kwan lost two years ago, but came out on top this year. KAREN KWAN (D) 5,550 MACADE JENSEN (R) 4,544

SALT LAKE COUNTY Salt Lake County Mayor Ben McAdams soundly defeated openly gay Republican candidate Dave Robinson. Equality Utah endorsed McAdams. BEN MCADAMS (D) 209,124 DAVE ROBINSON (R) 138,298

Equality Utah-endorsed Catherine Kanter, who spent a large amount of personal money in the race to unseat Richard Snelgrove as Salt Lake County Councilman is trailing as of press time. Snelgrove won the endorsement of the Utah Taxpayers Association, of which he touted widely. RICHARD SNELGROVE (R) 173,191 CATHERINE KANTER (D) 165,495

STATE SCHOOL BOARD In District 7, Summit County and east Salt Lake County, Carol Barlow-Lear, who earned a 100% rating in the Equality Utah survey, won over Shelly Teuscher, who earned a 67 percent rating. Equality Utah did not endorse in this race. CAROL BARLOW-LEAR 27,849 SHELLY TEUSCHER 22,040 Watch qsaltlake.com for final results

Anti-gay Rep. LaVar Christensen in extremely tight race for re-election bid The author of Utah’s Amendment 3, which defined marriage as between one man and one woman, as well as several other antiLGBT measures, LaVar Christensen, is losing by a smattering of votes at press time to challenger, Democrat Suzanne Harrison. In preliminary election results as of Tuesday night, Nov. 15, Harrison shows 7,574 votes (50.1 percent) to Christensen’s 7,545 votes (49.9 percent) with all votes cast on election night counted, but with some absentee and provisional ballots still outstanding. Final election results will be certified by Tuesday, Nov. 22. A candidate can request a recount only if the race is closer than a quarter percent. The Sandy district is one of the most evenly divided districts in the state between Democratic and Republican votes. Christensen, an attorney, wrote Amendment 3 and sponsored the legislative measure that put it on the ballot. It passed overwhelmingly by voters in all but Sum-

mit and Grand Counties. In 2011 alone he introduced three anti-LGBT bills. The first would have voided contracts that “went against state policy,” prohibiting same-sex couples from making contractual agreements, such as wills and financial arrangements. The second aimed to create state policy on traditional families, saying they are supported by “nature and nature’s laws.” The final bill was a broad-sweeping religious liberty bill that would have exempted anyone from local non-discrimination laws if they acted on religious grounds. This year he introduced a bill that declared the federal Constitution could not override Utah law in marriage and divorce matters, an obvious attempt to override the Windsor ruling by the U.S. Supreme Court. He also penned another bill under the guise of “religious liberties.” Harrison is the chair of the Department of Anesthesiology at Riverton Hospital

NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 13

december 2016 | issue 262 | gaysaltlake.com

White supremacist tells Utah voters Evan McMullin is gay in robo-calls White supremacist and Donald Trump supporter William Johnson paid for a robocall targeting independent presidential candidate Evan McMullin in Utah. The call said: “Hello, My name is William Johnson. I am a farmer and a white nationalist. I make this call against Evan McMullin and in support of Donald Trump. Evan McMullin is an open borders, amnesty supporter. Evan has two mommies. His mother is a lesbian, married to another woman. Evan is okay with that. Indeed Evan supports the Supreme Court ruling legalizing gay marriage. Evan is over 40 years old and is not married and doesn’t even have a girlfriend. I believe Evan is a closet homosexual. Don’t vote for Evan McMullin. Vote for Donald Trump. He will respect all women and be a president we can all be proud of. I paid for this ad for the American National Super Pac.” The Daily Beast announced the calls before they started. In response to questions, Johnson told them, “I said that ‘I think he is a closet homosexual.’ Calling someone a homosexual is no longer defamation. Also, he is a public figure. Word on the street is that he is gay.” He also cited cited a Reddit thread of unsubstantiated claims about McMullin’s alleged homosexuality. In response, McMullin tweeted, “Another desperate attack from GOP nominee @ realDonaldTrump and his racist supporters as he continues to lose ground in Utah’” He later tweeted, “This attack is consistent with @ realDonaldTrump’s bigoted, deceitful campaign and vision for America. Utahns won’t be fooled.” Lastly, he tweeted, “I’ve stood for liberty and equality in this race; it’s natural for @

realDonaldTrump’s white supremacists to attack me. A fight worth having.” The McMullin campaign told the Deseret News in a statement that McMullin is not gay. McMullin has stated, “As a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, I believe in traditional marriage between a man and a woman, but I respect the decision of the Court, and I think it’s time to move on,” saying he’d have preferred the matter be handled by the states. Asked if a President McMullin would appoint Supreme Court justices who would overturn the case nullifying state marriage protection laws nationwide, Obergefell v. Hodges, he replied, “I wouldn’t.” Johnson paid for a robocall in February asking voters not to support a “Cuban” — a reference to Trump’s primary opponent Marco Rubio. Johnson said calls will reach 193,000 residential landlines in Utah through Wednesday evening at a cost of about $2,000. In 1985, according to the Southern Poverty Law Center, Johnson, a Brigham Young University graduate, proposed a Constitutional amendment that would revoke the American citizenship of every nonwhite inhabitant of the United States. A quarter century later, in 2010, he was still actively supporting white nationalist causes, serving as chairman of the racist American Third Position political party, which was renamed American Freedom Party in 2013, which seeks to run racist candidates nationwide. “No person shall be a citizen of the United States unless he is a non-Hispanic white of the European race … Only citizens shall have the right and privilege to reside permanently in the United States,” Johnson’s 1985 statement read, in part. Q

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gaysaltlake.com | issue 262 | december 2016

Utah Pride Center elects new board leadership. Interview with the new chair The Utah Pride Center Board of Directors has elected a new slate of leaders at its annual election meeting. Former vice chair Sue Robbins is the new board chair, Michael Fordham is the new vice chair, Tim Johns is secretary and Jason Suker is treasurer. The new board will take office in the beginning of January. We asked a number of questions of Robbins to get a glimpse at where the Center will go under her leadership. What are your top immediate goals for the Center, and what long-range things would you like to see focused on? Under the guidance of [outgoing chair] Michael Aguilar, we redefined our mission and vision and re-aligned high level operations to abide by non-profit best practices. We will be looking at fine-tuning those efforts. I am already talking with Carol Gnade, our executive director, to discuss how we see the future and the impact it will have on the center. As we enter a new year, we always are looking at the annual Utah Pride Festival and Parade. Each year we strive to improve over the previous year and to change things up to some level so we have something new to offer each year. The planning is already under way and we have a short-term view of locking down all the major decisions so that we have the following months to put all of those thoughts in place. We have brought on a new events director to our staff, Liz Pitts, and she and the always fantastic Festival Steering Committee have already been hard at work putting plans in place. Also, we are continuing with our effort to move the Pride Center to a new location. A Building Committee, comprised of

QMmunity Holiday decor at the garden club The Alternative Garden Club has two fun holiday events coming up in December: On Wednesday, December 7 they will meet at the Sugar House Garden Center

board members and community members with broad skills related to this effort, have been performing all the needed strategy and planning and we are in the phase of selling the existing location. This effort will be long-range as the selling of the current location, buying new property, and ensuring the property is move-in ready, will be a lengthy effort. How do you see the recent national election affecting the Center? We are already seeing the impact clearly in two areas. First, our mental health group has seen an increase in activity. Obviously, we can’t talk about reasons for visits, but the increase is clear. Additionally, our Rainbow Law Clinic had an increase in attendance in their last session. We are recommending that transgender individuals complete legal actions like name changes and passports, along with recommending all LGBTQ+ individuals complete efforts like adoption proceedings due to the uncertainty. One outcome that will be hard to measure will be those individuals who come to the center because it is a safe place. One of the primary objectives of the Utah Pride Center is to provide a safe place and the current environment certainly reinforces the need. Coming into a friendly and welcoming environment can be a needed respite for those that have been through a difficult day. For so many years, the trans community felt invisible and ignored by the Center. How do you see that today and in the future? Obviously I see a change to some level or I wouldn’t be the chair of the board of directors. [Robbins is a transgender woman.] I have come onto this board and have been able to contribute from the start and have been treated in a very respectful man-

at 7:30 PM for a presentation by the talented designer Dean Anesi of Urban Garden Company on centerpieces and table decorating. Later in the month, they will gather at a private home in the Avenues for their annual Christmas Potluck.WHEN: Weds. Nov. 2, 7:30pm WHERE: Sugar House Garden Center, 1602 E. 2100 S

ner. In looking back, the recognition or lack of recognition appears to have some alignment with national visibility. As the transgender community was fighting for visibility on the national level, that shortfall would be reflected in the local community’s efforts. The transgender community has had an increasing exposure over the last few years, both from advocates and in the passing of affirmative laws and that has raised awareness across the entire community. I feel this has benefited my efforts as who a transgender person is has become less of a mystery for many. We still have a lot of education to go as we are a diverse group within ourselves, but in order to advance the entire cause, we need to understand the entire community and their identities. I often say, education leads to understanding; understanding leads to acceptance; and greater acceptance leads to social change. We are on a forward moving path but we need to continue learning the breadth of the entire transgender community. Anything you’d like to say to our readers that I didn’t ask? As someone who also identifies as sexually fluid and intersex, possibly the first chair to have those

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Salt Lake Men’s Choir’s annual Christmas Concert “Utah’s Other Choir” will once again perform their holiday concert the second weekend of December. Called “Yuletide

Echoes,” there are many new songs being rehearsed and some audience favorites returning as well. WHEN: Friday, Dec. 9 at 7:30 pm, Saturday Dec. 10 at 7:30 pm and Sunday, Dec. 11 at 4 pm. WHERE: First Baptist Church, 777 S 1300 E COST: $15 INFO: saltlakemenschoir.org

NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 15

december 2016 | issue 262 | gaysaltlake.com

identities, I do not view things through a single lens. As we have seen improvement in transgender visibility, we need to also push those efforts across other communities. The Bi+ community has historically been marginalized similar to the transgender community. We have other communities like the asexual and intersex communities that have little-to-no visibility. Across all the communities, there are intersectional identities — being a person of color, being undocumented, being underemployed or unemployed, and others that add to the discriminations and micro-aggressions that our community faces. When we look at advocacy and programs, we need to consider all of these while also main-

taining the same voice for our gay and lesbian communities. I encourage individuals of all parts of the greater LGBTQ+ community to apply to the various organizations to be on their board of directors. As a white transgender woman who has many privileges, I feel I have started to create a path for others, but there are many more voices that we want to come widen the path for all. I am grateful that I am trusted with a position where I can make a very positive impact on my community. I try to spend time reaching out and meeting those in our area and I feel it is a privilege to be able to contribute in this manner. Q More info at utahpridecenter.org

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Free* HIV Testing Options UPC launches awareness project The Utah Pride Center launched a new awareness campaign meant to show solidarity and unity for Utah’s LGBTQ community and its allies and address the problems those in the community face, especially in the wake of this year’s presidential election. The “We See You and We Love You,” campaign was created in response to the recent election, which has included verbal and physical harassment of members of the LGBTQ community.

It is also a response to the LDS Church’s announcement in how to treat those in samesex relationships and their children. On Black Friday, Nov. 25, volunteers will distribute 25,000 wristbands throughout the state of Utah to encourage wearers to signify they are a safe, affirming allies who support the LGBTQ community. Wristbands can be ordered at utahpridecenter.org for those wishing to help distribute. Q

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16 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | VIEWS

Quotes “Her really dramatic impersonation of me does make me think, ‘Oh my gosh, did I roll my eyes? Lift my eyebrows?’ My laugh, which has been noted since I was a little girl — ‘hearty’ is the way it’s often described — I see the exaggerated version of it and I do sometimes think, ‘Well, maybe I should just sort of back off from that.’ But then I forget and go on and just be what I’ve always been.” — Hillary Clinton to People, when asked about Kate McKinnon’s Saturday Night Live impression of her.

“It’s irrelevant because it was already settled. It’s law. It was settled in the Supreme Court. I mean it’s done… these cases have gone to the Supreme Court. They’ve been settled. And… I’m fine with that.” — President-elect Donald Trump when asked about same-sex marriage.

“I’m pro-life. The judges [I appoint] will be pro-life.” — President-elect Donald Trump about Roe v. Wade

“Obviously we did not win last night and a lot of people are disappointed. A lot of people are disappointed with what happened nationwide. We need to remember we ran a great campaign and a lot of people came out to support me and a lot of people came out to support democrats all across the country.” —Misty Snow on her U.S. Senate race against incumbent Mike Lee

views

gaysaltlake.com | issue 262 | december 2016

VIEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 17

december 2016 | issue 262 | gaysaltlake.com

who’s your daddy?

Not your dad’s gift guide BY CHRISTOPHER KATIS

One of

my biggest struggles in writing this column is trying to make people understand that LGBT parents are not just like other moms and dads. Yes, there are tremendous similarities. However, every day we face struggles and make decisions for our children that our straight peers do not. Our lives are also very different from our childless gay and lesbian friends and family. So it only makes sense to choose gifts tailored specifically to us and our kids. I had a difficult time explaining that to some of the PR people who pitched me ideas. One even called me “mean” because I admitted I think marshmallow is gross. Luckily, there are plenty of gift ideas that actually do make sense. Books are always a great idea. For parents, why not choose a title like Lesbian and Gay Parenting Handbook: Creating and Raising our Families by April Martin or All the Ways Home by Jo Schneiderman and Cindy Rizzo. You can always go for a lighter read like You’re Not From Around Here, Are You? by Louise Blum or Mommy Man by Jerry Mahoney. For the kids try one of my favorites, And Tango Makes Three by Justin Richardson and Peter Parnell or Mommy, Mama and Me (or its companion, Daddy, Papa and Me) by Leslea Newman and Carol Thompson. Cadyn Cathers, a psychological assistant at the Los Angeles Gender Center and

an affiliate faculty member at Antioch University Los Angeles, reminded me to include books for trans* kids and their parents. He suggests My Princess Boy by Cheryl Kilodavis, Red: A Crayon’s Story by Michael Hall or The Transgender Child: A Handbook for Parents and Professionals (also The Transgender Teen) by Stephanie Brill. Our own King’s English Bookstore carries many titles for LGBT parents and their families, and will be glad to order for you any books not already on their shelves. For some fun clothing options and LGBT parent-specific household times, check out Café Press. I love the Hatched by two chicks tee shirt and the I love my two dads hoodie. For the adults, try the My loving family will NOT ruin yours tee shirt. And if anyone is looking for a stocking stuffer for me, I’d really like the It’s Daddies. Plural. coffee mug! You can check out the cool ideas Café Press offers at cafepress.com/+gay-pride+gifts. If you’re like me, and would prefer to give gifts that also help the world out, why not make a donation to the Point Foundation, the nation’s largest provider of scholarships to LGBT youth. You can donate here: my.pointfoundation.org/ donate. Equally important, encourage gay students to apply (pointfoundation.org/ point-apply/apply-now/), applications are open until Jan. 30, 2017. Another great option is to make a dona-

CALL YOUR REAL ESTATE TEAM TODAY!

tion in the names of the LGBT parents you know to the Utah Pride Center (utahpridecenter.org/get-involved/ )or Equality Utah (equalityutah.org/donate), both working tirelessly to improve our lives. LGBT parents deserve a little fun, too. Pick up the tickets for the whole family to the 2017 Pride Festival. The website says they’ll be on sale soon. And why not go the extra mile and volunteer to hang out with their rug rats at the Kids’ Zone, so mom and mom can have some one-on-one time at the Festival? Let’s not forget that not all parents love human children. For the LGBT pet parents out there, the Human Rights Campaign has a fun selection of items for those cats and dogs with two dads. You can get a great gift and help out a wonderful cause at shop.hrc.org/home-office/pet-1.html. All of the LGBT parents on your holiday list will love any of these gifts. I know I would. Except for marshmallow; that stuff is just nasty! Q

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18 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | VIEWS

guest editorial

gaysaltlake.com | issue 262 | december 2016

Now that the election is over BY MIKEY ROX

It was

the election that would never end — until it did. Now that we’re free and clear of who’s our new president (which is still undecided as of press time, by the way), let’s get back to real life. Consider these eight things you need to do now that the voting booths have closed to stop the madness for at least another four years.

TAKE A MOTHERFUCKING NAP This election has been exhausting. Exhaaaausting. You’ve had heated debates with your family over it. You’ve lost friends because of their inability to align their political views with your own. You’ve. Blocked. People. On Facebook! I mean, I get it — all of this emotional turmoil has taken its toll on you. In fact, you’re probably eating your feelings right now as you read this article. So — I’m gonna do you a solid: Put away the ice cream, homeboy; don’t even think about that extra slice of pizza. Take your ass to bed right now. A long nap is in order to clear your head of what’s happened over the past 18 months, and you deserve it. (No matter what the Republicans say about your lazy ass.)

WAKE UP AND ASSESS THE SITUATION So we’re here. We have a new president — perhaps the one we wanted, perhaps the one we said would make us move to Canada if he were elected. Either way, it’s a fresh start for America, for better or worse. Take it in, think about it, contemplate what this presidency means to you personally. Then pour yourself a shot. You’re gonna need it.

CONCEDE, AND BE KIND TO ONE ANOTHER Listen, if your candidate didn’t win, don’t call ‘rigged’ — you’ll look like an idiot to every intelligent person you know. Instead, accept the Electoral College’s decision on who should be the leader of the free world and absolve yourself of all responsibility. Your outcry won’t change a thing, and no-

body likes a sore loser. Which is especially important if you’re trying to get laid in the aftermath.

TRY TO REPAIR THE BROKEN RELATIONSHIPS You’ve unfriended people for being insane on social media during this election season, and you’ve likely been unfriended by others because you went a little too far in your own political posts. Now that it’s over, however, it’s time to make amends. Reach out to your great aunt and tell her that you still love her even though she’s a proper idiot for supporting Trump. Say you’re sorry to your estranged grandma even though she voted to take your rights away. At the end of the day, what’s done is done, and all you need to concern yourself with right now is that they’re both gonna die waaaay before you do.

BUY A COLORING BOOK AND FUCKING RELAX Adult coloring — yeah, you finally get to use your Crayola 64 to its full potential — has “therapeutic potential to reduce anxiety, create focus, or bring [about] more mindfulness,” according to Marygrace Berberian, certified art therapist and Clinical Assistant Professor and Program Coordinator for the Graduate Art Therapy at NYU. As such, I recommend The Gay Erotic Coloring Book on Etsy to calm your nerves — mostly for its proportionate illustrations of good dick.

TAKE A BREAK FROM SOCIAL MEDIA Social media is precisely the reason you’re on a regimen of three Xanax a day. Now that pure evil has taken office (which is lucky, because this assumption works for both candidates), shut that shit down. Take a week off. Nobody will miss your halfeaten burrito pics or how you’re totally protesting the destruction of native land as a result of the Dakota Access Pipeline, despite that you’re definitely not gonna get off your ass to do anything worthwhile to prevent it.

START TO REMEMBER HOW YOU DON’T MATTER Sure, your vote “matters,” but do you? Not to any politician in office. It’s best to remember that when the revolution is upon us.

START THINKING LONG TERM For the past year and a half we’ve all been thinking short term — who will be our next president? Now that it’s decided, you need to refocus on the long term, like how we’re going to afford gas and food and mortgages in the future, and what you’re going to do when America does itself in. Because that’s coming, ya know. Stay woke, friends, or we won’t make it. Just ask Greece. Q Mikey Rox is an award-winning journalist and LGBT lifestyle expert whose work has been published in more than 100 outlets across the world. Connect with Mikey on Twitter @mikeyrox.

VIEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 19

december 2016 | issue 262 | gaysaltlake.com

guest editorial

SAGE is ready to make Salt Lake truly LGBT senior-friendly I recently BY RICHARD STARLEY

returned from the SAGE USA national conference in St. Petersburg, Fla. where I met with representatives of other local SAGE affiliates (SAGE — Services & Advocacy for GLBT Seniors). In that city’s Metro LGBTQ Wellness Center, St. Petersburg’s mayor Rick Kriseman noted that his city had just received a perfect 100 score by the Human Rights Campaign Foundation’s Municipal Equality Index. Part of this score were two additional points for providing services for LGBTQ seniors. Arriving home, I read in QSaltLake two articles that spoke of our city’s relationship with our gay community, including gay seniors. The HRC MEI score for Salt Lake City was 69, with no additional points for serving LGBTQ seniors (these points can be under municipal services). Their metric says: “city provides services to seniors by directly providing, funding other organizations to provide, or provide meaningful support (in-kind, use of facilities, etc.) for organizations supporting seniors.” Neither Salt Lake City nor Salt Lake County does this. An adjoining article from SeniorAdvice. com (a national senior housing locator) detailed its recent retirement score for US cities. The headline read “Report: LGBT Seniors Are Welcome Here.” Their SeniorScore rating for SLC was 71 percent. It also touted Salt Lake as one of America’s “top cities for gay-friendly retirement,” ranked at number 11. I found no data at SeniorAdvice supporting this claim for gay seniors. In fact, their own data concluded that, although Salt Lake City’s property taxes are lower than the national average, our overall cost of living is high compared to national averages; that the area has a very high property crime rate and a high violent crime rate. It finally concludes that Salt Lake’s rating of 71 percent is below the national average of 72 percent. I’m not sure how they conclude that Salt Lake City is a welcoming place for gay seniors. There was no data to support that. In fact, it doesn’t seem like a good place for anyone to retire. We all love our beautiful city and state. For those of us who grew up gay here, we

also know where we fall short. Gay rights in Utah have been hard-fought over many years, and still there is a long way to go. Services for LGBTQ seniors are just now becoming a long-overdue issue. Even with a gay friendly city administration, Salt Lake isn’t there yet. LGTBQ seniors are a forgotten minority in an ever-expanding wave of seniors in need of services. But SAGE Utah is willing to help make Salt Lake a gay senior-friendly city. During her campaign, Jackie Biskupski included her pledge to work toward an age-friendly city using standards developed by the World Health Organization. However once elected, this work was relegated to Salt Lake County as a human services issue. Concurrently, Ben McAdams referred 12896 S Pony Express Rd LotusStore to senior issues as an initiative and created a Plan for Greater Salt Lake which looks Suite 200 in Draper at four growth areas, including aging. No (just north of IKEA) LGBTQ seniors were invited. 801.333.3777 As the only organization focused on www.ilovelotus.com the needs of Utah’s LGBTQ seniors, SAGE Utah is ready and eager to work with local and state governments to improve the quality of life for LGBTQ seniors. We know that Salt Lake City can be above average — we A down-to-earth law firm that aims for solutions, not fights. live here. We have We help you develop the most cost-effective strategy to much to offer. We meet your goals for your case. Our mission is to give a voice can truly make our to underrepresented people and to empower our clients city welcoming to all through a wide variety of legal services. seniors. Following Our tool box includes St. Petersburg’s cooperative negotiation and example, we invite aggressive advocacy, depending mayors Biskupski on what the situation calls for. and McAdams and others to join with us in serving LGBTQ Danielle Hawkes, Esq. seniors. Q

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gaysaltlake.com | issue 262 | december 2016

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BY D’ANNE WITKOWSKI

Log Cabin Republicans have refused to endorse Donald J. Trump for President. On the one hand, Good for them. I mean, LCR isn’t a group with especially high standards (they endorsed Romney, after all), so their refusal to endorse Trump is really saying something. But then again, don’t expect me to be impressed that you finally decided on Oct. 22 that Trump was a no-go for the Republican homos. Look, Republicans are not inherently bad people. But the Republican party has been taken over by a right-wing fringe that not only has no place for LGBT people, but that actively fights against LGBT rights at every turn. So it has been hard over the years to watch LCR lick the boots of just about every candidate the GOP threw at them. It’s like watching an abusive relationship and you know that the person being abused has really complicated reasons for not leaving, but that doesn’t make it any easier to witness. Even in their official statement announcing their lack of endorsement they can’t help but make excuses for Trump. “Mr. Trump is perhaps the most proLGBT presidential nominee in the history of the Republican Party,” LCR states. “His unprecedented overtures to the ‘LGBTQ community’— a first for any major-party candidate in our nation’s history — are worthy of praise, and should serve as a clarion call to the GOP that the days of needing to toe an anti-LGBT line are now a thing of the past.” Okay. First of all, Hillary Clinton was way out front on all the LGBT stuff. It seems like LCR is claiming that Trump deserves credit for acknowledging that the LGBTQ community exists and is worthy of more than derision. It’s literally the least he can do. But it is more than Republican presidential nominees have done in the past. So woo woo progress, I guess. But a “clarion call to the GOP” that anti-gay is a thing of the past? Has LCR read the 2016 GOP platform? Because the GOP platform goes out of its way to shit on LGBT people.

“Our laws and our government’s regulations should recognize marriage as the union of one man and one woman and actively promote married family life as the basis of a stable and prosperous society,” the platform reads. “For that reason … we do not accept the Supreme Court’s redefinition of marriage and we urge its reversal, whether through judicial reconsideration or a constitutional amendment returning control over marriage to the states.” Aww, isn’t that cute? Because the torn patchwork of marriage rights and laws was working out so well for everybody. Like when my wife and I got married in California and came home to Michigan as legal strangers again. Those were the times. The platform also endorses the so-called First Amendment Defense Act, which makes it legal to discriminate so long as you’re doing it because the Bible told you so. And LCR does not like that Trump likes this at all. The LCR statement continues, “Rhetoric alone regarding LGBT issues does not equate to doctrine. As Mr. Trump spoke positively about the LGBT community in the United States, he concurrently surrounded himself with senior advisors with a record of opposing LGBT equality, and committed himself to supporting legislation such as the so-called ‘First Amendment Defense Act’ that Log Cabin Republicans opposes.” Ah, if only Trump didn’t have those gosh-darn anti-LGBT advisers he’d probably be the grand marshall in the NYC Pride parade. To be honest, I feel a little bad calling Log Cabin Republicans “creeps,” because that’s not fair. It’s victim blaming, really. Trump is a creep, 100 percent. But that’s been obvious from the very beginning of this campaign. And that LCR seems to just now be figuring that out is further evidence that they need to demand better and believe that they deserve better. Q D’Anne Witkowski is a poet, writer and comedian living in Michigan with her wife and son. She has been writing about LGBT politics for over a decade. Follow her on Twitter @MamaDWitkowski.

VIEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 21

december 2016 | issue 262 | gaysaltlake.com

mr. manners

’Tis the season It seems

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that each year Christmas comes earlier. To be completely honest, this year it felt that Halloween never really stood a chance. Once we passed the midway mark of October, Christmas arrived with TV commercials and billboards of holiday cheer. Christmas shopping began to spread like the plague before November 1. Christmas is important, but is it necessary to hurdle over two other holidays to move the holiday forward? Regardless, Christmas is a time of giving but rather than focusing on the amount of gifts, how about this year we focus on the quality of the gifts. Rather than fussing over the newest piece of technology and wondering how it will fit into your already expanding arsenal of gizmos and gadgets, let’s build the memories that will last a lifetime. Let’s establish new traditions. Hailing from a long line of Southern gentleman, my family lives across the East Coast. Each year, rather than spending the money on presents which then have to be packed into suitcases and checked with airlines (which I still never trust with anything of significant value), we all attended a college football game together. It’s not just any football game, it’s the Virginia Tech vs. Duke football game. This tradition gives us the chance to alternate traveling back to our alma maters and cheer on our favorite teams. Not to mention, because this is

a gift, we get really great seats. It tends to even out in the end. The cost of the trip offsets the other gifts we would have exchanged. Maybe college football isn’t your thing. That shouldn’t stop you. Perhaps you and your significant other could plan your annual vacation and pay for it using the Christmas fund. My partner and I do just that. Each year, rather than exchanging gifts, we pool our funds and use them toward a week away to somewhere tropical. We use this opportunity to explore the world, and enjoy the opportunity to get away during the coldest parts of a Utah winter. Each tradition is different and they do not necessarily involve you planning a trip. Perhaps during the holiday season you can plan on volunteering. There are multiple opportunities and charities around Utah in need of volunteers. Some examples in our community include the Utah Aids Foundation and the Road Home, youth homeless shelter. So, pick something that is important to you and start a new tradition this year. On a final note, make sure that as we prepare for a new year, that you also take the time to focus on each holiday rather than leaping forward to Christmas. Much like Nordstrom, I agree that the best time to deck the halls is the day after Thanksgiving? Why? I just like the idea of celebrating the holidays one at a time. And we can all agree, that no one — holidays included — likes being neglected. Q

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gaysaltlake.com | issue 262 | december 2016

qhealth

Home for the Holidays BY PETER STOKER

The holiday

season can be a very stressful time for anyone, with all the financial obligations, arranging family time, and endless parties can be exhausting. Being part of the LGBTQ+ community may present even more things to make the season more stressful. Perhaps your family hasn’t accepted your ‘lifestyle’ or you bringing home a partner for the first time might be earth shattering. Maybe this is even the time you decide to come out to your loved ones, which can bring increased anxiety and stress! I have a few suggestions on how to have a happy and healthy holiday season.

STAY POSITIVE Worrying about your family’s judgments and comments is a valid concern. Studies have shown that most people do eventually accept and embrace their LGBTQ+ loved ones, so give your family members time to work out their feelings and opinions, as long as they treat you with the respect you deserve. I know it’s hard to just be patient because when did we have to be patient for them to accept the binary cis-gendered relatives for conforming to societies expectations? Try your hardest to find the optimistic viewpoint in a negative situation.

BE AWARE OF ANXIETY Be mindful and notice when your tension levels are rising, and allow yourself to process them. Feelings never hurt anybody- the actions resulting from those feelings are the real kicker, and quite often those actions happen because feelings are so bottled up that the pressure forces an explosion. Often, simply noticing and naming the anxiety can calm it. As simple as it sounds, three deep, mindful breaths can bring instant relief, slowing the heart rate, reducing hypertension and anxiety levels. Slowdown in order to be more mindful of your environment and you will find it becomes easier to think clearly and find the optimistic viewpoint.

HAVE A PLAN

BE PREPARED

Don’t go into a holiday gathering unprepared, if this is your first holiday “out,” be ready to answer some (possibly misinformed, ignorant, or rude) questions. The best way to combat ignorance is with information, so feel free to give family members some resources where they can learn more on their own. If you’re bringing your partner home for the first time, discuss how you plan to discuss your relationship and show affection while you’re visiting your family and friends. Having a plan beforehand helps keep your emotions in check and allows you freedom to enjoy the holiday.

No one has to do it alone; if you feel like you need help, contact local LGBTQ+ groups or organizations to find out if they have any materials or tips for handling the holidays. PFLAG is an excellent resource for information on discussions with family members. If you have a family member who you’ve already come out to, connect with them during the holidays so you can be sure you’ll have someone there to support and affirm you.

GUIDE THE CONVERSATION One way to ensure a positive experience is to focus your conversations on common interests or topics with your family members. This can help avoid those awkward questions and comments, and also reassure family members that you’re not suddenly a different person because you’re LGBTQ+. Like previously stated you might be presented with some downright silly comments; simply acknowledge the silliness of the comments and shrug them off. If you’re planning to come out to your family during the holidays, remember that coming out is a process, you may have to have several conversations, and you should prepare what you’d like to say beforehand.

HAVE AN EXIT STRATEGY Even though it’s never pleasant to plan for the worst, it’s always helpful to know you have the option to leave if things get too uncomfortable. Get in touch with some LGBTQ+ affirming friends before you visit to make sure you have somewhere to go if you need some time away. If you don’t feel like you can handle a holiday at home, don’t force yourself; plan a celebration with some close friends instead. If you have to spend an extended amount of time with family, work some down time into the schedule. Removing yourself from the situation can be vital, and it can be done gracefully. Almost anyone will respect if you kindly say; “I just need some alone time.” There are lots of reasons to be alone, get creative. A short walk, a hot shower, a nap, an AA meeting, or even extended time behind the locked door of a bathroom can do amazing things to renew self-confidence, perspective and energy.

december 2016 | issue 262 | gaysaltlake.com

DON’T SELF-MEDICATE This doesn’t only refer to intoxicating substances. Most people eat and drink more and exercise less than they normally would at this time of year. If you’re prone to depression already, (and even if you’re not) a hangover and love handles won’t help. Plus, alcohol is a depressant and may seem to help for a while, but usually worsens depression and stress symptoms later on. It also reduces inhibitions, making hurt feelings, disagreements and fights much more likely. If you’re in a situation that you feel you may not be able to handle well, by all means, get out! But if staying will do less damage to yourself and others than leaving, remembering the finite nature of the visit may help.

TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF You know what you need to do to be healthy. Eat well, exercise, hydrate, rest, play and give yourself permission to be human. Remember, you’re not alone.

HOLIDAY SHOPPING GUIDE | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 23

“Forced fun” with co-workers, family and extended circles of families and friends happens to everybody. Many people, straight, gay and otherwise feel that they aren’t part of the celebration because they don’t feel particularly festive. The pressure to have fun, be nice and ignore grudges and difficulties can result in the completely opposite effect. What causes me the most stress, no matter what the situation, is usually worrying about something I have little or no control over. Recognizing that is crucial. People are going to think what they think, and my thoughts or actions will probably not change that in the short amount of time I have to spend with them during the holiday season. Whether they approve of me or not is none of my business – my business is to be happy, honest, kind, and healthy. I do it by knowing myself and taking care of myself, even under the pressure of midnight mass. Q

The Market is located upstairs near the Desert Edge Pub & The Spaghetti Factory on the following days: FriDay NovEMbEr 11th, 18th

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24 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | HOLIDAY SHOPPING GUIDE

gaysaltlake.com | issue 262 | december 2016

Sudanese immigrant Dominic Raimondo set up a foundation to help the children of the Loudo Village of South Sudan build a better future through providing a school and mean for them to obtain a formalized education. He is selling artwork from Sudan as well as made locally.

Our annual gift guide, once again, brings you local offerings to fill your stockings and space under the tree. Remember that by buying local, your money stays here and makes our community a better place. We start at the Trolley Square Gift Market, which happens Friday and Saturday, Nov. 18 and 19, Dec. 9 and 10, and Dec. 16 and 17. Info at kayartwork.com

Salt Lake pottery artist James Robertson has thrown pitchers and plates and platters that any lover of this area would love to have. Reach him at 801-318-7682 or see him at the Trolley Square Gift Market.

For something truly timeless and special, Park City’s Traci Pelton repurposes watches from the late 1800s and early 1900s into wearable works of art. From pendants to earrings to necklaces, each is an original. Some are Bulova, Waltham, Elgin and other big names of the day. You can meet her at the Trolley Square Gift Market or view her offerings online at imelesspiecesbytraci.com/

Come see the reversable, practical and beautiful apron for your kitchen adventures. Keep one side for you and one for your partner, or always have a clean side to turn to when it is time to serve.

december 2016 | issue 262 | gaysaltlake.com

HOLIDAY SHOPPING GUIDE | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 25

Who doesn’t have a unicorn enthusiast on their shopping list? Or sockmonkeys. Hand made with love. Gertrude Green can hook you up at the Trolley Square Gift Market or at 801-671-5753 or rggreenscreations@gmail. com

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26 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | HOLIDAY SHOPPING GUIDE

gaysaltlake.com | issue 262 | december 2016

Gifts

Lube

Gay photographer and artist Randy Laub spends the summers in Europe and brings home the most beautiful works of art for your walls. He is at the Trolley Square Gift Market and has a gallery at 3474 S 2300 E. He is on Facebook as Photoissino

Underwear

Books

Housewares

Donate to the utah Humane Society and get a great, useful gift. Buy your UHS 2017 calendar at utahhumane.org/calendar or drop on by their shelter at 4242 S 300 W

Adult Toys

OPEN DAILY 10am–9pm on Harvey Milk Boulevard 878 E 900 South 801-538-0606

But if pets don’t make you hot, then how about the second annual Utah Firefighter Calendar? Proceeds go to the Utah Chapter of the American Cancer Society. Did you know that 68% of firefighters fall victim to cancer? Neither did we. Get your calendars5 Saturday, Dec. 3, 9:30pm at The Green Pig Meet & Greet to get it signed by the firefighters, or Dec. 21, 6:30pm: Leatherheads Sports Bar in Draper. Also online at utfirefightercalendar.org

december 2016 | issue 262 | gaysaltlake.com

HOLIDAY SHOPPING GUIDE | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 27

A pinch of magic for your holiday season

THE NUTCRACKER DECEMBER 2–26

TICKETS ON SALE NOW! BALLETWEST.ORG

28 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | HOLIDAY SHOPPING GUIDE

Best Book Gifts BY TERRI SCHLICHENMEYER

The gift list was easy this year. For once, you knew what to get everybody. Every. Single. Giftee. Easy-peasy… except, oops, that one person who vexes you each year. What to get? Well, books are always good gifts, and they’re super-easy to wrap, too. How about one of these great selections for that One Person…

LGBT INTEREST In “Saving Delaney” by Andrea and Keston Ott-Dahl, your giftee will read the story of one little girl, her life before birth, her lesbian moms and her wealthy parents, and what happened when she entered the world with Down syndrome. Wrap it up with tissues and “Journey to Same-Sex Parenthood” by Eric Rosswood, a book filled with tips and tales of gay and lesbian folks who finally became parents. If there’s an art lover on your gift list, they’ll love unwrapping “One Man Show: The Life and Art of Bernard Perlin” by Michael Schreiber. Part gay history, part art, this book showcases the life of a man who painted portraits of gay clubs and street life, and whose works were collected by mid-century high-society collectors, some of which still hangs in museums today. For the mom or dad who’s just learned that their child is gender-questioning, “The Gender Creative Child” by Diane Ehrensaft, PhD might be a loving gift. It’s a book that will guide them through many early questions and thoughts they may have now, and later. Wrap it up with “When Your Child is Gay” by Wesley C. Davidson and Jonathal L. Tobkes, MD, for the answers to even more questions. What does it mean to be a man or a woman? In “The Fate of Gender” by Frank Browning, your giftee will learn what

science says about gender, brains, chromosomes, social pressures, and how other countries see gender and the spectrum. Wrap it up with “Queer Identities and Politics in Germany: A History 1880-1945” by Clayton J. Whisnant, a fascinating history book that looks at German LGBT organizations, people, publications, and the culture, especially during World War II.

FICTION For the independent traveler on your list, “Paris for One & Other Stories” by Jojo Moyes might be a great bon voyage gift. It’s a collection of short stories about change, opportunity, independence, and life in general. Pair it with “The Jungle Around Us: Stories” by Anne Raeff. It’s a collection of tales with the jungle, its mystery, darkness, and richness, as both metaphor and connecting force here. The reader on your gift list who prefers books set in other time periods will love “Cruel Beautiful World” by Caroline Leavitt. It’s a 1960s-era story of a woman who chooses a man over the sister who basically raised her, and the dynamics of family. Put it together with “Jazz Moon” by Joe Okonkwo, a book set in Harlem, 1925, where Paris is where it’s at, baby. The person who loves a little mid-century drama will enjoy “The Jealous Kind” by James Lee Burke. It’s a bit of a Romeoand-Juliet novel set in the 1950s in Texas, at a time when the line between the “haves” and the “have-nots” was drawn in the sand with danger, and money talked a lot. Definitely wrap it up with another great dramamystery, “Manitou Canyon” by William Kent Krueger. Cork O’Connor is back and sleuthing. Fans, rejoice. Historical novel lovers will devour “News of the World” by Paulette Jiles, a book set in Texas in the years following the Civil War. When a down-and-out former Captain of the military is hired to deliver an orphan girl to

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her distant relatives, he partakes an adventure – not just through rough terrain, but through rocky childcaring, too. Wrap it up with “The German Girl” by Armando Lucas Correa, a multigenerational novel about home, based on a true story. Dog lovers will howl over “Jonathan Unleashed” by Meg Rosoff. It’s the story of a man who’s at the end of his leash, and his brother’s dogs, who begin to show him that dogs are smarter than they seem. Wrap it up with another perfect book for your dog lover: “Lily and the Octopus” by Steven Rowley, the story of a man, his aging, best friend, and love. And won’t the pet lover on your list love getting “A Guinea Pig Oliver Twist” in that package, too? Yes, it’s Dickens as you’ve never seen him before… If there’s someone on your list who’s looking for meaning in her life, “Fill the Sky” by Katherine A. Sherbrooke might make a great gift. It’s the tale of two friends, one who is dying of cancer, and their a spiritual journey together. Wrap it up with something nonfiction: “Sharing My Shoes” by Tammy Gaffney, a book about forgiveness, trust, and reconciling with God in the best ways possible. For the person who loves a good romp, both in story and bedroom, look for “Love Slaves of Helen Hadley Hall” by James Magruder. It’s a tale of a ghost, a group of undergraduates, and the drama that ensues.

GENERAL NONFICTION For the true crime buff, “Trials of the Century” by Mark J. Phillips & Aryn Z. Phillips is a great go-to gift. What made Sam Sheppard’s case, the Lindbergh baby, and Charles Manson leap onto the headlines? This book looks at those famous cases, and more…Wrap it up with “I Will Find You” by Joanna Connors, a story of a reporter who finally reveals a crime she had to hide, and the man who committed it.

The new homeowner will love opening “Detroit Hustle: A Memoir of Love, Life & Home” by Amy Haimerl. It’s the story of a couple who bought a fixerupper in one of the country’s most economically-hard-hit areas, and how four walls can become a place to call home. Wrap it up with “Detroit Resurrected” by Nathan Bomey, a book about that city, its bankruptcy, and its path toward getting back on track. Is there someone on your gift list who loves nothing more than to be scared? The one who longs for a different holiday? If so, “The Monster Book” by Nick Redfern is what you want to wrap up. Using quick chapters and scattered photos, this book informs, entertains and (good for your giftee) scares! Definitely wrap it up with “Real Visitors, Voices from Beyond, and Parallel Dimensions” by Brad Steiger and Sherry Hansen Steiger. Ooooooh, then shiver! For the woman who’s just about had enough this year – of everything – you’ll want to wrap up “The Bitch is Back,” a collection of essays edited by Cathi Hanauer. This no-nonsense sequel to “The Bitch in the House” is just as empowering and strong as its predecessor, and it’s perfect for the strong woman on your list. Also look for “Face Value” by Autumn WhitefieldMadrano, an insightful, intriguing look at how our looks shape the way we live, work, play, and mate. The science fan on your gift list will love “Death on Earth” by Jules Howard. It’s a straightforward book on life, life expectancy, and the deaths of creatures of all kinds, including parasites and more. Bonus: it’s not just about dead things. Add to it “The Point Is” by Lee Eisenberg, a book on who we are, why we’re here, and how we can make the most of life until we die.

MEMOIR / BIOGRAPHY For any daughter with a father, “Bandit: A Daughter’s Memoir”

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by Molly Brodak will be a great gift this year. It’s the story of Brodak’s relationship with her dad, a man she thought she knew. But did she? Find out here… then wrap it up with “A Woman on the Edge of Time” by Jeremy Gavron, a story of a man who gets at the root of his mother’s suicide. The person on your list who loves reading memoirs will love “The Clancys of Queens” by Tara Clancy. It’s about the wild, needa-spreadsheet childhood that the author endured, the family that split her time three ways, and the people who shaped her to be who she is. Wrap it up with “Trying to Float” by Nicolaia Rips, who writes about growing up in a hotel in New York City. Eloise, anyone? How do you drive someone happy this holiday? You wrap up “Preston Tucker and His Battle to Build the Car of Tomorrow” by Steve Lehto, foreword by Jay Leno. This biography of Tucker, the creator of an ahead-of-itstime vehicle is a car-crazy reader’s dream. The lover of Christmas will also love “Tree of Treasures: A Life in Ornaments” by Bonnie Mackay. It’s a memoir written through the trimmings of a tree; where the author got them, why she loves them, and how they make her remember.

POLITICS Undoubtedly, there’s a political animal on your gift list who didn’t get enough politics this year. Fear not! “Man of the World: The Further Endeavors of Bill Clinton” by Joe Conason will let you check off another name. This book takes a look at Clinton’s work in his post-presidential years. If your giftee is still wondering what happened this political year, you can’t go wrong when you wrap up “The Year of Voting Dangerously” by Maureen Dowd. It’s a book filled with essays by the woman who’s covered elections for the past nine presidents.

FOOD WRITING The gourmand on your list will love “Super Sushi Ramen Express” by Michael Booth, an examination of Japanese food as seen through a family (including two small children) who travels the length of that country in search of adventure and, by the way, good food. Pair it up with this unique book for foodies: “The Farm on the Roof” by Anastasia Cole Plakias, a book about a food farm that, over two rooftops in two areas of New York, grows enough food to feed several families.

MUSIC / MOVIES / TV There’s someone on your gift list who loves music of all kinds, and “They Call Me Supermensch” by Shep Gordon will be a welcome gift. Gordon was a manager for a number of Big Name music acts, as well as an innovator in the entertainment industry. Who can resist a book like that? Nobody, especially when you wrap it up with another mensch-y book, “Seinfeldia” by Jennifer Keishin Armstrong. It’s a book about “nothing,” which surely became a great big something. For the midnight-movie fan who can’t get enough of toast or Janet, “The Rocky Horror Picture Show FAQ” by Dave Thompson is exactly what you want to give. This book is absolutely jammed with facts, stories, fun-to-know details, everything you ever wanted to know about Frank-NFurter and more.

HISTORY For the Cold War buff on your list, or for the person who loves a bit of a thriller, “The Tunnels” by Greg Mitchell is a great book to wrap. It’s a narrative of escapes from behind the Berlin Wall, and the surprising way the U.S. reacted. Pair it up with “Forty Autumns” by Nina Willner, a story of the author’s family, separated by a great big German wall. See Terri’s full list at gaysaltlake.com

HOLIDAY SHOPPING GUIDE | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 29

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30 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | A&E

The Gay Agenda BY TONY HOBDAY

ANNUAL EVENTS In a new venue this year, Kurt Bestor will only be better at what he does best. It’s best if you check it out or best be ready for some curt words best heard from Kris Kringle hyped up on Krab Cakes in Best Buy, or best yet, behind the Zion Curtain! Oh, and it’s best to curtsy Kurt at the finale … that’s what his best half says

THURSDAY — A KURT BESTOR CHRISTMAS

Eccles Theater, Delta Performance Center, 131 S. Main St, times vary, through Saturday. Tickets $32.50-72.50, artsaltlake.org.

DANCE The Salt Lake Ballet Theater presents The Night Before Christmas, a not-so-fable fable. Hear me out. So, a stunning, charismatic girl, Toni Hobday, passes out after a Christmas party and has a dream in which a Christmas Fairy, Stevie Ball, takes her to Santa’s workshop. There she meets the Snow Queen, Gene Nate, and her ice maidens, David, Darryl and his other brother Darryl. They take her to the Kingdom of Weiners where she meets Chelle and her Nutcracker Wife, Donna. Gorgeous Toni then visits the Palace of the Christmas Fairy, called Reed Weeds owned by Michaela Green. Toni is surprised when her stupor takes her to Mother Goose, Denise McCracken. As Toni’s wits slowly start to come about, Santa arrives with gifts abound but so does the Horrible Hateful Donald and his seven Grinches: Pence, Melania, Ivanka, Tiffany, Barron, Eric and Putin. They are there to kidnap America … can it be saved? Spoiler Alert: America foiles her captors and Miss V becomes the first female president of the United States.

FRIDAY — THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS

Jeanne Wagner Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. 300 South, 7pm, 1pm & 7pm Saturday. Tickets $16-18, artsaltlake.org

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SPECIAL ENGAGEMENTS

MOVIES

This year’s Salt Lake Men’s Choir holiday concert, Yuletide Echoes, includes “some of the old favorites (Christmas carols, not the choir members!) and some new, original pieces and arrangements.” I wonder why they’ve called it Yuletide Echoes — is it because of what emulates from the foggy depths of Michael Aaron’s hot tub on a snowy winter’s night? The Utah Symphony backs the cast of Cirque Musica as “they put on an unforgettable show of grace, skill and incredible feats of strength” like ... catwalking in 9-inch stiletto heels, calculus and log rolling blindfolded in a corset. In lieu of “Another One Bites The Dust,” like Hil and Reno (not the city, but should have been), a cover band of Queen hits the Park City City stage in spandex, headbands and bushy mustaches ... sounds like 5am at the Silver Mountain Sports Club. Anyhoo, the night is sure to rock you!

If you didn’t get the chance to see this hit last year at the Sundance Film Festival, now is the time to do it without vacillation. A critically acclaimed family-based drama set in a small fishing village in Massachusetts and starring two of my favorite film stars, Casey Affleck and Michelle Williams, this film bends your senses, criticizes the disavowed and hopefully gives believe wholly in the resolve of the human heart.

FRIDAY — SALT LAKE MEN’S CHOIR YULETIDE ECHOES

First Baptist Church, 777 S. 1300 East, times vary, through Sunday. Tickets 15, brownpapertickets.com or at Club Try-Angles, 251 W. Harvey Milk Blvd., and The Library Store, 210 E. 400 South

FRIDAY — CIRQUE MUSICA HOLIDAY SPECTACULAR

Abravanel Hall, 123 W. South Temple, 7:30pm, 11am & 7:30pm Saturday. Tickets $37-87, artsaltlake.org

FRIDAY — MANCHESTER BY THE SEA

Broadway Centre Cinemas, 111 E. 300 South, times vary. Tickets $6.75-9.25, saltlakefilmsociety.org

THEATRE The first show listed below is not only selfexploratory but also self-explanatory, so hey guys, let’s go to Uranus that we know so well. Oh, and hey guys, let’s not judge the second show … if it works, woohoo!!

THURSDAY — MEN ARE FROM MARS, WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS

Jeanne Wagner Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. 300 South, times vary, through Saturday. Tickets $50, artsaltlake.org

TUESDAY — HEDWIG & THE ANGRY INCH

Eccles Theater, Delta Performance Center, 131 S. Main St, times vary, through Dec. 24. Tickets $30-70, artsaltlake.org

WEDNESDAY — QUEEN NATION

Egyptian Theatre, 328 Main St, Park City, 8pm, through Thursday. Tickets $29-45, egyptiantheatrecompany.com

UPCOMING EVENTS JAN. 17-22, 2017 Kinky Boots, artsaltlake.org JAN. 19-29, 2017 Sundance Film Festival, sundance.org FEB. 2-5 Mamma Mia!, artsaltlake. org JUNE 20–25 Dirty Dancing, artsaltlake.org AUG. 1-20,The Book of Mormon, artsaltlake.org

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Salt Lake’s Elytra is a gender-bending band BY MIKKI ENOCH

Salt Lake

City is home to the band Elytra (eee-LIETruh). I recently got to speak with Scotty-Ray Phillips, the group’s lead singer and song writer. They were excited to discuss Elytra, their music and their history. This project has come to life as Phillips

Scotty-Ray Phillips has expanded their skills on the stage while growing as a person who wants to reach out and not only entertain but inform their audiences as well. How did the group come together? About two years ago I met the drummer of Elytra (Lindsay Heath) after she approached me to compliment my music with a previous project called The Femme Medea. We became Facebook friends and over time she started messaging me about creating a sort of “super group” that she had envisioned including her favorite musicians from various local bands. The idea remained a seedling of a subject for almost an

entire year before the stars aligned and I got together with Lindsay and Chris Murphy (synth/keys) to jam and feel out the potential of working with them. There’s a lot of intricate detail and history of how it all fell into place, but Elytra started off under the name Medusa’s Cross with a different guitarist, bassist and cellist before we had some shifting around and found the perfect chemistry with Secily Saunders (guitarist) and Janet Chotia (bass). I will admit, after working with mostly guys initially, I felt very passionately about the energy of working with more sensitive/feminine artists. So when our original guitarist and bassist quit the band around the same time, I asked Lindsay if she knew any bad-ass femme musicians, and she conjured up a beautiful crew of powerful women, and the most kindhearted guy ever. Chris has totally become the brother of the group. What is the inspiration for the current EP? The writing took place over the course of about nine months, mostly in my 25th year of life. Finishing up the writing for the EP when I turned 26 (I seem to remember things based on seasons). After a major battle with depression, my mental health was in a fragile state and my aunt had just passed away from cancer. The first couple songs we finished (“Crash” and “The Maze”) were written just before checking in to a doctor and making the effort to get healthier. So the remaining three songs were all written during a time that I was seeing a therapist and working through some deeply rooted emotional trauma. There’s a present theme of family, mental health and

definitely identity that carries over from song to song. By the end of the EP, if the listener is fully tuned in, they will have a bit of glimpse into who I am and what the last year of my life taught me. Every lyric has been impeccably complemented by music that is equally as emotive. I wrote these songs for my LGBTQ family and community, and feel that the overlying tone of hopefulness is the best gift I know how to give during a time as politically skewed and bizarre as we are living in now. The EP offers realism through the eyes of a mentally ill, gender nonconforming individual who happens to identify as a witch. How do gender and sexuality relate to your music and performance? Most of the band members fall into the “Q” spectrum and there is a strong feminine energy on stage. Being that the singer and lyricist is queer/femme but male bodied, the story line of the

music and the aesthetics of the performance are very ambiguous and androgynous, but with a focus on the feminine side of the yin-yang. You’ll hear through the writing style that ambiguity adds an element of mystery for listeners who are just hearing and not seeing “I’m not a little boy or a little girl, just a little person in your little world” is an example of lyrics from the song “Afraid of Me,” which was written about my difficulty relating to my father growing up. I also use descriptive words like “wanderer” & “tired eyes” in the song “Embers and Stardust” to keep the description of an experience between two people completely gender neutral. It’s important for me when writing to paint a picture that is very emotional and human, and less about genitalia. Q Take a listen to their music at elytra. bandcamp.com/releases. The music has an energy all its own that should be experienced to decide how it fits into each individual’s world.

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Q&A

Love Is Love Is Love MICHAEL BUBLÉ ON LEAVING AN LGBT-AFFIRMING LEGACY, MAN CRUSHES AND MALE ADMIRERS BY CHRIS AZZOPARDI

“You know

what I’ll be Googling tonight: Bublé, gay, queer, all that stuff,” says Michael Bublé one recent afternoon, after being informed that said search terms render colorful results. All you lovers, though, needn’t search beyond the dreamy crooner’s recently released album, Nobody But Me, and its 10 feel-good tunes, including several new originals and reimagined classics gleaned from the Great American Songbook. Love, naturally, is featured prominently on Bublé’s ninth studio album, as well as in our recent chat, during which the affable ally spoke about the “joy” the LGBT community has brought him and the importance of standing up for queer issues. And no, not solely because he’s a staunch LGBT-rights advocate — when his kids grow up and read this interview, he says it’s important to him that they feel “proud.” In 2010, you performed on a stage you deemed “phallic” because it resembled a penis. Then, a gay man threw you his keys, and you were not shy about bending over and picking them up. (Laughs) I remember! That was a guy named Paul O’Grady, and he’s very famous in the UK. He does an act where he dresses up as a woman, who is also very famous, almost like Dame Edna. He’s a sweetie pie. I was so happy that he did that that night because it just gave me so much. How would you describe the affection for you from the gay community? The truth is, I don’t think I could’ve given them as much joy as they’ve given me. I’m in a business where, as you can imagine, I’m surrounded by the gay community. I mean, that’s just my life. I’m an artist, and so I’m surrounded by other artists. And everyone from my hair stylist who lives with me on the road to [my stylist] Jeff Kim, who puts me in my suits every day — I mean, god, the question isn’t who’s gay? The question is, who isn’t? (Laughs) And by the way, the ones that seem the most macho, they’re probably gay. Now would be a good time to talk about how your wife, Luisana Lopilato, thought you were gay when she first met you. (Laughs)

Yes, she walked in this room with a man, and the man was so good lookin’ that he made Brad Pitt look dumpy, so I assumed they were together. I naturally assumed that this was her boyfriend or her husband, so I refused to hit on her. And listen, it didn’t help that she didn’t speak English either at the time. Not a word. But the more I drank that night, the more brazen I got about trying to find out what the situation was between them. Finally, after two hours — and I don’t know how many shots and glasses of whiskey — I finally said, (effects a drunk slur) “You guys are such a beautiful couple,” and he said, “We’re not together.” He said, “She came because she likes you.” And at the same time, she was on the phone texting her mom saying, “Oh my god, Michael Bublé is all over my friend. He’s so gay.” She knows you’re straight now, right? (Laughs) I assume so. I mean, after the kids. Also, I assume she thinks I’m not gay when every night I say, “Mmmmm?!” and she says, “No, I have a headache.” You recently donated items that were auctioned off to benefit the Stonewall National Monument. To be honest, I’m doing more because of [my publicist] Liz Rosenberg. There’s something I have in the works. There’s the Harvey Milk High School that she was talking about here in New York, and I want to help there, too. Listen, I love being able to spout words, but sometimes you gotta put your money where your mouth is. [Liz] said, “Should I call your manager to find out if he thinks it’s OK?” So she called my manager and my manager said, “Why are you asking me? Of course!” How long before there was a pic of you suggestively eating corn on the cob did you become aware of your gay following? (Laughs) I think it was hours. Just hours? Hours! You know, that day I took my godson, my best friend and his wife to Disneyland, and I was looking after him because he’s a little guy. He’s four years old and he had this corn, and butter was everywhere. So, I was trying to help him with napkins, and then I grab mine and it was dripping … and my first thought was… oh

god, you know what I mean. It was just the worst timing ever. The truth is, I had fun with it. There are so many terrible things you could do to land in the press or go viral with, and if that’s the worst thing, then you know what, I just gotta laugh at myself. But seriously: When did you know you had a gay following? Listen, I’m not Madonna. I don’t look out and see thousands of gay couples out at the shows, but even at the start, man, when I played the Blue Note (a jazz club in Greenwich Village, New York City). I’ll tell you the honest truth: I played the Blue Note 16 years ago, and the other night I had a show there, and I’m still close with one of the first fans I ever had in America. Forget about the world. In America. And his name is Johnny Blue Note, and he’s about 6-foot-5, a New Yorker with a huge personality, and he’s beautiful. I got sentimental the other night. I did a big radio show to open up the record, and I looked into this little, intimate club, and there was Johnny Blue Note. And I got sentimental. I talked about [him] during the show. So, I think from the very start there was Johnny. That was my first ever gig, and one of my greatest fans and harshest critics was Johnny. He was my foray into my relationship with the gay community and me as an entertainer. Even before my music director was Alan Chang, there was Bryant Olender and Bryant is this really smart, funny, talented, slutty, very gay musical director. You say you’re no Madonna, but still, you’ve performed with several gay icons: Barbra Streisand, Mariah Carey, Kylie Minogue… Kylie Minogue, yes. I sang with her, and actually, I was supposed to see her in Vancouver. She was going to come over and have tea with me, but I had to fly to Europe. She had been there and was going to come over, because I happened to sing with her on a Rod Stewart special and we really got on and liked each other, so I was just gonna hang out with her literally weeks ago. And Elton John is somebody I’ve gotten

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to know. I love him very much. Obviously, we don’t have to talk about how talented he is — we know how talented he is. He’s also really warm and effusive with me, and I just saw him in Vegas. I went backstage and gave him a big hug. He was so happy, and he really enjoyed being there. It’s funny, man, because I gotta guess that there are people out there who are gay in this business but won’t tell anyone. Have you met these closeted stars? Yeah, I meet them and I get the impression. And listen, I’m not gonna be the guy who outs the person, but it always made me wonder: “Why?” I understand if they are

afraid, or they don’t want to tell their parents, but the fact that it could be a question within this business of hurting your business is just mind-blowing to me. Do any of them confide in you? No. I mean, I have the worst gay-dar ever. I really do have the worst gay-dar. I could be hanging with somebody and my friends will be like, “Michael, he was hitting on you hard,” and I’m like, “What are you talking about — he’s just a really nice guy!” Sometimes I don’t pick up the shit people are puttin’ down. If a gay couple asked you to sing any of the songs off this new album at their wedding, which would you sing and why? Aww. I think maybe “The Very Thought of You.” And to be honest with you, man: I don’t care if it’s a gay or a straight or a black or a poor wedding — love is love. And I think that would be a really beautiful, romantic first dance. In the past, you’ve man-crushed on Blake Shelton and One Direction’s Niall Horan. Who are you currently man-crushing on? That’s a good question. God, you wanna hear who I’m man-crushing on? There’s a couple of them. My No. 1 man crush is probably John Oliver [host of HBO’s Last Week Tonight with John Oliver]. The other is [The Daily Show host] Trevor Noah. Goddamn — what a stunning South-African man. You know what I love, man? I love that they’re self-deprecating and funny, and I know they’re empathetic because their point of view tells me that. Obviously, they’re liberal, progressive, self-confident; they have a great sense of humor. I just love that. [American astrophysicist] Neil deGrasse Tyson too. And god, the late [AngloAmerican author and essayist] Christopher Hitchens. If you can man crush on a dead guy, I am man-crushin’ on a dead guy. [Linguist and philosopher] Noam Chomsky, I love. I’m trying to think of people I spend most of my evenings with, because this is who I spend most of my evenings with. Oh, Lawrence Krauss, the greatest astrophysicist. Honestly, their intelligence and skill at orating just… I mean, I’m wet. Is it true that your Uncle Frank and Uncle Mike, who have been together for over 40 years, taught you acceptance and openmindedness? With or without them, the truth is, my father and my mother were so progressive, and I’m so lucky that my father just made it very simple. He just said,

“It’s nature. A man can love a man and a woman can love a woman, and this doesn’t just happen with human beings — it’s science. It happens in nature. It happens with almost every animal.” Having two boys of my own who I love more than I’ll ever love myself, I can’t tell you how crushing it would be if they couldn’t feel that they could tell their father that they were gay — or different in any way. To me, [because of them], it just became a much bigger issue. If one of your sons were to come out to you, how might you respond? With nothing but love. And I’m not saying that to you because it’s you or the magazine. It’s because I love them, man. I love them so much that I just want them to be happy. My goal in life is to make them beautiful, happy human beings, and if that’s who they are — because I’m killed, just devastated, when I hear people saying they “choose.” “Choose”? What are you fucking talking about? You don’t choose. It isn’t a choice. It is genetic. And I understand some people have an issue with the whole marriage thing and the sanctity of this word “marriage.” I mean, I don’t get it, but I can choose to listen to their point and hear it. I don’t agree with it. I always joke, everyone jokes: Why can’t gay people be just as miserable as straight people who are married? But listen to me, we are in a world — a dangerous world — right now, and if you’re not standing up against intolerance, then you’re for it. God, I sounded like George W. fucking Bush right there, holy shit. “If you’re not with us, you’re against us!” As an ally with a massive platform, it’s important for you to say that for this movement to move forward. I agree. And you know what, I think people are so afraid of losing fans. Are you afraid of that? No, no. I’m not. Because you know what, years from now, when my kids grow up and they read this, they’re going to be proud of their father because their father was on the right side of the line. There are a lot of people, and time does this, who are going to be severely embarrassed for their bias and intolerance. And they’re going to have to live with that; that’s going to be their legacy. I refuse to have that as part of my legacy. Q Chris Azzopardi is the editor of Q Syndicate. He can proudly say Mariah Carey once called him a “daaahhhling.” chris-azzopardi.com and @chrisazzopardi on Twitter.

34 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | A&E

gaysaltlake.com | issue 262 | december 2016

hear me out

Frank Ocean, Lady Gaga, Bon Iver BY CHRIS AZZOPARDI

Frank Ocean, Blond The genius of Frank Ocean’s intimate second release is its scant emphasis on sexuality. Despite the attention given to Ocean’s queerness after his groundbreaking coming out in 2012, when the gifted Grammy winner posted a heartfelt letter to Tumblr revealing his bent sexuality and affection for a special fella, Blond positions gayness as inconsequential to overall worth. Take, for instance, a casual mention of “the gay bar you took me to.” Understated lyrics related to his sexual fluidity evoke a brazen label defiance that new generations of queer rebels wear like a badge of honor. For that reason alone, the album is important and influential, as self-exploratory revelations draw upon nuanced recollections neatly tucked into serene R&B mid-tempos that enrapture you with their inviting sweetness. Beyond his euphoric soundscapes is Ocean’s stream of consciousness, imparting cinematic and transient anecdotes that range from the loss of childhood virtue (“remember how it was: climb trees, Michael Jackson, it all ends here...”) to the complicated circumstances that adulthood summons. “Solo” sits atop a bed of organ accompaniment, throwing you into a divine state of hypnosis with the chorus’ “inhale, inhale, there’s heaven,” a reprise that couldn’t sound better unless you were hearing it in a hazy dream. “White Ferrari” is another respite. Here, Ocean falls into a quiet daydream, just a lover, their existential talk and an atmospheric blend of guitar and synths. The reverie, a classic among classics, concludes with indie virtuoso James Blake assuring, “We’re so OK here; we’re doin’ fine.” On “Pink + White,” Beyoncé adorns the otherworldly outro with a gentle wind of whispery undertones, suppressing her presence to let Ocean have his moment. As Ocean reflects on scenes from his life throughout one of 2016’s greatest and most moving sets — his feelings and playbacks about sex, social media and those

unforgettable car rides; the boyfriends, the girlfriends — it’s our own we’re seeing in the rearview mirror. Grade: A

Lady Gaga, Joanne Is less always more? On her return to form, Lady Gaga hangs up the meat dress after reaching the epitome of self-parody a couple of years ago, when the icon sold Artpop like it was 2014’s Lemonade. You know how that turned out. Shortly thereafter, she reeled it in, which meant losing the beef frock to sing the Super Bowl’s National Anthem and actually wearing a pantsuit. It became clear that Gaga’s impending post-Fame Monster era would be without excess. (Just ask Tony Bennett, who crooned the Great American Songbook with her.) Named after her late aunt, Joanne is, sure enough, a songwriter’s album. Though the set’s songwriting — particularly “Hey Girl,” a squandered sisterhood collaboration with Florence Welch — doesn’t achieve the same strange intrigue as even her most inane pop scrawls (see: “Swine”), you don’t have to look farther than punchy lead singles “Perfect Illusion,” “A-YO” and the belted heartbreaker “Million Reasons” to know Gaga’s back on (a very meatless) track. But who knew she’d recover with this no-frills, Southern-tinged vocal showcase? Obviously, it doesn’t hurt that “Grigio Girls” — with its spirited drunkaround-a-campfire vibe — sounds like a grrl-power anthem for a future Coyote Ugly remake. Even better is “Angel Down,” a poignant Black Lives Matter tribute written in honor of Trayvon Martin. “Where are our leaders?” she painfully pleads, enraged. Flaws and all, Joanne is certainly Gaga like we’ve never heard her before — meaning, it’s Mother Monster at her most human. Grade: B+

Bon Iver, 22, A Million Bon Iver’s latest is a rumination on the uncertainty of life and time and moments and other stuff and things. Beautifully cryptic things. One: a river that knows no bounds, that doesn’t “heed a line… or stay behind,” a beautiful allegory for perseverance. Another: some unidentified man whose guitar Vernon carries, galvanizing him to “go in.” Vernon’s fragmented imagery seems to suggest a man at a crossroads. Him? Perhaps. On 22, A Million, he takes the road less traveled, casting his Grammy-winning style of Wisconsin-born folk — heard on his 2006 debut, For Emma, Forever Ago and, later, on its self-titled follow-up — into a bold, futuristic discord that progressively deconstructs as it enacts a meticulous structural subversion. The result is hypnotic, as the album opens like something out of an alternate dimension on the sax-kissed “22 (Over S∞∞n)” and then, on “715 — CR∑∑KS,” he works his sinewy bellow into static distortion that wreaks havoc on the most neo of neo-folk. The turning point of this challenging narrative is “21 M◊◊N WATER,” when the clamor is distilled into a soothing cascade of New Age-y synths. The transition into the next track, “8 (Circle)” (imagine an ’80s Bonnie Raitt ballad in the year 2040), is perfection. It almost couldn’t get better, except it does. The album’s coda, “00000 Million,” elicits tears for reasons initially unclear, and then it hits you; it’s because of this hopeful assertion: “The days have no numbers.” Because, too, the moment is meditative, tender and, performed on a creaky piano, rendered beautifully. And because, frankly, Bon Iver’s best, most lifeaffirming work is right in front of you. Grade: A Chris Azzopardi is the editor of Q Syndicate. Reach him via his website at www.chris-azzopardi.com and on Twitter (@ chrisazzopardi).

december 2016 | issue 262 | gaysaltlake.com

A&E | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 35

DECEMBER 16TH | 8PM-12AM

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36 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | A&E

gaysaltlake.com | issue 262 | december 2016

food & drink

Cuuking in de Keeshen with Constancia BY RICKY WILLIAMSON

Constancia

de Campos de los Santos del Extra Extra Non-Virgin Olive Oil, is the hostess of one of the newest live cooking shows on Facebook: Cuuking in de Keeshen with Constancia. Living in Utah, she is very Latina and does not apologize for the Latin flare and expletives that sprinkle the show. Hence, her show is rated PG-13, and on a good day, R! In her first interview, we had the opportunity to get the story behind this delicious Latina known as CONSTANCIA! Who was your cooking inspiration? Aye ju know what? My Mother! When I was junger chee juse thoo cook for everyjuan! Whenever anybody came over they were eeeting and leeeving with food. Chee had eight seesters and they basically raised us. Chit, there were so many of us. My tias (that’s aunts for all ju gringas) had so many different husbands I had a CHITLOAD of cousins! So ju know whenever we got thugether it was a huge Mexican Riot ahh ha hay!! That’s right BEESHES!! Arroz, carne, tortillas, cerveza, lots of hot chit, and lots of pinche gas!!! Ahhh ha hay!! But that’s where I got all my inspiratchion! I loved those beeshes! What do you like best about the show? I love my Beeshes! Those are de peoples dat wash my tcho! I call dem my BEESHES! If I don’t call ju a Beesh, jur not my friend! Ha. I have viewers from de U.S.A. to Brazil and even Australia!! Can ju beleeve that chit? What do you hope to do with the show? I would like to solve world peace by juan day cuuking for dat new Gringo President!! I would give heem such a foodgasm!!! HA, when I’m thru he wood be screaming my name and blowing down that pinche wall with his own GAS! Ahhhhh ha hay!! To catch her show go to fb.me/CuukingConstancia. All the previous episodes are in the Videos link. Go like and follow Constancia. You won’t regret it.

Constancia’s Mexican Cocoa 1 tablet of Abuelita mexican chocolate 4 cups of milk 1 can evaporated milk ¾ can sweetened condensed milk ½ cup semi sweet chocolate chips ½ stick of salted butter 1/3 teaspoon of cumin powder ½ teaspoon chili powder ½ tablespoon cinnamon 1/3 cup water 1 tablespoon cornstarch So this is a very, very, rish Mexican cocoa. Do NOT add any chugar unless ju wanna be a diabetic! If ju want eet less sweet, add some water. OK Beeshes now less make some cocoa. First get a large enough sauce pan to hold 5–6 cups of liquid. Add the milk and evaporated milk and make sure the burner is not thuu hot.

Maybe medium hi. Then once the milk eez starting to get warm add the Abuelita Tablet. Now, you want thu mix dis cuz otherwise eet could scorch de milk. Keep mixing slowly until the tablet meltses. Now add the sweetened condensed milk, the butter, and the chocolate chips. Keep mixing until the chips melt thuu. Add the cumin, chilli, and cinnomon. Mix. Now ju want dis thu be kinda theeck cuz ju know we like eet like dat. Ahhh ha ha ha. Anyway, make the water/cornstarch mixture and add to the cocoa and keep mixing until it gets all nice and theeck. Everything will be really mixeded well and the cocoa should be brown. Pour inthu a nice big mug and eet with some Pan Dulce from jur locol Mexican Market. Enjoy Beeshes! Muuuuuaaaahhh!!

A&E | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 37

december 2016 | issue 262 | gaysaltlake.com

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38 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | A&E

gaysaltlake.com | issue 262 | december 2016

gay writes

The road to discovery BY CHUCK TABARACCI

The end

of September arrived and it was time for my annual trek to Montana. Every year since moving to Utah, I’ve made it my goal to drive up and visit my family. For many years, this has been a routine 8-hour drive on I-15, visit for a couple days, then drive back the same route. That is, it was routine until a few years ago. I thought about the previous trips I have taken, always via interstate highways, with their chainstore restaurants, fast food establishments, and standard indigestion-inducing fuel plazas, and wondered how much in my life I have missed out by not taking the proverbial “road less traveled.” I decided that I needed to break out of that routine and check out more of the state in which I was raised. I named it my Discover Montana Tour. I’ve been asked if these trips are on my bucket list, and I inform those who ask the question that I don’t have such a list. A bucket is a container, and a container has limits. These trips are more of a “What’s down that road?” adventure. The first year of this tour took me on Highway 89, which also happens to run through Utah. I went through some beautiful country and some amazing valleys between mountain ranges, but my big discovery that year was the small, nearly ghost town of Ringling, Montana. Per the historical marker along the side of the highway, it was named after John Ringling of the Ringling Brothers Circus. He had purchased a large ranch in the area and later this became the winter quarters of the Ringling Brothers/Barnum & Bailey Circus. I had to use my imagination to see what this town must have been in its day, as most of what remains are abandoned buildings and foundations of what stood there long ago. Last year, the second year of my tour, I went a little farther east to see what might lay on that highway. Several nice small towns that are slowly restoring their main areas to draw more tourists, but my discovery that trip was the Bleu Horses. This is an art installation of a herd numbering 39 realistic looking metal sculptures standing on a lonely ridge, with the mountains in

the distance. There is no sign or real parking area, but it was an amazing sight to see on this lonely, lightly traveled ribbon of asphalt. This year I decided to make it a longer trip, stretching the drive over two days. I planned to drive on the east side of the mountains that the throngs of tourists to Yellowstone and Grand Teton National Parks rarely visit. The highway took me over the Beartooth Mountain, one of the most beautiful drives in North America. This is not just my opinion but in the writings of many travel authors. The route snakes along the side of the mountain on the Wyoming side until it reaches nearly eleven-thousand feet above sea level, then snakes its way down on the Montana side. It was fall, and in Montana the mountains are covered in a lush green of pine and fir, broken occasionally by the rich veins of gold formed by the Aspen trees changing colors for the season. As I reached the top, the road became increasingly narrower with more curves, and my memory flashed back to the summer of 1968. That year my dad hitched up a travel trailer to the back of our 1965 Mercury for a trip to Yellowstone. Now this car was huge, with what we figured was a six-body trunk, and my dad had heard about the Beartooth Highway and wanted to take it into the parks. Little did he know how this highway was designed and built, and I do remember my sisters and me sensing his concentration so we were unusually wellbehaved. As I drove my RAV-4, I wondered to myself, “How in the hell did he manage this with that car and trailer?” After finishing that beautiful drive, I ended up at a resort outside the town of Red Lodge, Montana. It was off-season, so I managed to get a good rate. They had a wonderful-looking restaurant on the property and, due to the time of year, it was nearly empty but the food was amazing. The wonderful thing about these small locally-owned places is that the chef

could create a dish not on the menu for my vegan diet. After my dinner, while enjoying a beer, a nice couple came in and sat at a table next to me. We began to chat and they informed me of this year’s discovery. Near the town of Red Lodge lies a 10,000 acre working ranch that was purchased by the Gray Goose vodka heirs, and they named it Tippet Ridge. They bought it due to the beautiful location, and brought in world-famous sculptors to build works of art that, due to their immense sizes, had to be built on-site and scattered throughout the property. Unfortunately, they had just closed for the season but the woman shared photos on her phone of this wonderful place. Even though I was unable to physically visit this sight on that trip, I still consider it a discovery because I hadn’t known of it before, but it is on my list for next year. I have kept this quest for discovery in all other areas of my life, especially my long runs on Sunday mornings, varying my routes to see what is out there. I find that exploring new areas along the Ogden bench and trails gives me a fresh perspective, as well as landscaping ideas. This has helped in my life to keep things fresh and interesting. I am grateful for making the decision to see what’s out there and support local establishments and the people they employ, no matter where they are. I recommend that those of you who read this will occasionally get off the highway and see what else is out there in this big world. I have found myself to be much more relaxed and less stressed when I finally reach my destination, and try to apply this approach to every aspect of my life. It’s a philosophy I hope that more people will adopt, and share their experiences with those around them as I have. Q Gay Writes is a DiverseCity Series writing group, a program of SLCC’s Community Writing Center. The group meets the 2nd and 4th Monday of each month, 6:30-8 pm, 210 E. 400 South, Ste. 8, Salt Lake.

A&E | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 39

december 2016 | issue 262 | gaysaltlake.com

DINING GUIDE Most Fabby in Park City

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40 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | COMICS

gaysaltlake.com | issue 262 | december 2016

anagram AN ANAGRAM IS A WORD OR PHRASE THAT CAN BE MADE USING THE LETTERS FROM ANOTHER WORD OR PHRASE. REARRANGE THE LETTERS BELOW TO ANSWER: HINT: WHAT BEN WILLIAMS CALLS DONALD TRUMP

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PINK MEDALLION BINGO CASINO ALCOHOL PUZZLE ANSWERS ON PAGE 54

december 2016 | issue 262 | gaysaltlake.com

COMICS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 41

42 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | QMMUNITY

Qmmunity Groups ALCOHOL & DRUG

Alcoholics Anonymous 801-484-7871  utahaa.org Gay and Lesbianspecific meetings: Sunday 3p Acceptance Group, UPC, 255 E 400 S Monday 8p Gay Men’s Stag (Big Book Study), UPC, 255 E 400 S 8p G/Q Women’s Meeting, Disability Law Center (rear door), 205 N 400 W Tuesday 8p Live and Let Live, Disability Law Center (rear door), 205 N 400 W Wednesday 7p Sober Today, 375 Harrison Blvd, Ogden Friday 8p Stonewall Group, UPC Crystal Meth Anon  crystalmeth.org

gaysaltlake.com | issue 262 | december 2016

BUSINESS

LGBTQ-Affirmative Psycho-therapists Guild of Utah  lgbtqtherapists.com * jim@lgbtqtherapists.com Utah Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce  utahgaychamber.com * info@utahgaychamber.com Vest Pocket Business Coalition  vestpocket.org 801-596-8977 DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-7233 YWCA of Salt Lake  ywca.org/saltlakecity 322 E 300 S 801-537-8600

Salt Lake Valley Health Dept HIV/STD Clinic 610 S 200 E 801-534-4666 Utah AIDS Foundation  utahaids.org * mail@utahaids.org 1408 S 1100 E 801-487-2323 HOMELESS SVCS

Volunteers of America Homeless Youth Resource Center, ages 15–21 655 S State St 801-364-0744 Young Men’s Transition Home 801-433-1713 Young Women’s Transition Home 801-359-5545 POLITICAL

HEALTH & HIV

Equality Utah  equalityutah.org * info@equalityutah.org 175 W 200 S, Ste 1004 801-355-3479 Utah Libertarian Party 6885 S State St #200 888-957-8824 Utah Log Cabin Republicans  bit.ly/logcabinutah

Northern Utah HIV/ AIDS Project Walk-Ins Tues Noon–5pm 536 24th St, Ste 2B, Ogden 801-393-4153 Planned Parenthood 654 S 900 E 800-230-PLAN

Each Sudoku puzzle has a unique solution which can be reached logically without guessing. Enter digits 1 through 9 into the blank spaces. Every row must contain one of each digit, as must each column and each 3x3 square. Qdoku

Q doku Level: Hard

6 7 3 4 5 3 8 1 7 5 6 2 7 4 1 4 2 8 1 6 6 1 9 2 5 3 1 6 5

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4 6

9 8

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6 8 1 7 4 2 1 5 3 5 2 7 9 6

9 8

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1 5

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801-657-9611 Utah Stonewall Democrats  utahstonewalldemocrats.org RELIGIOUS

Deeksha Utah  deekshautah. wordpress.com First Baptist Church  firstbaptist-slc.org * office@firstbaptistslc.org 777 S 1300 E 801-582-4921 11a Sundays Sacred Light of Christ  slcchurch.org 823 S 600 E 801-595-0052 11a Sundays Wasatch Metropolitan Community Church  wasatchmcc.org 801-889-8764 Sundays, 11a at UPC SOCIAL

1 to 5 Club (bisexual)  bit.ly/1to5club Alternative Garden Club  bit.ly/altgarden * altgardenclub@gmail. com blackBOOTS Kink/BDSM * blackbootsSLC@ aol.com Get Outside Utah  bit.ly/GetOutsideUtah Men Who Move  menwhomove.org OUTreach Resource Centers  outreachresourcecenters.org Ogden — 705 23rd St — Weds, 3-7:30pm Logan — 596 E 900 N — Fri, 4:30-7:30pm Brigham City — 435 E 700 S — First Tuesdays, 4-7pm

Clearfield — 782 E 700 S — Thurs, 5:307:30pm 801-686-4528 qVinum Wine Tasting  qvinum.com Rainbow Classic Car Don R. Austin 801-485-9225 Sage Utah  facebook.com/sageutah  sageutah@ utahpridecenter.org 801-539-8800 Temple Squares Square Dance Club  templesquares.org Weekly dances Thursdays 7p at UPC 801-449-1293 Utah Bears  utahbears.com  info@utahbears.com Weds 6pm Raw Bean Coffee, 611 W Temple Utah Male Naturists  umen.org  info@umen.org Utah Pride Center  utahpridecenter.org  thecenter@ utahpridecenter.org 255 E 400 S 801-539-8800 SPORTS

Lambda Hiking Club  gayhike.org Pride Community Softball League  prideleague.com  pcsl@prideleague.com Q Kickball League  qkickball.com Sundays, 10:30, 11:30, Sunnyside Park QUAC — Queer Utah Aquatic Club  quacquac.org  questions@ quacquac.org

Men who enjoy being naked in social, nonsexual settings. We have nude lunches, retreats, campouts, house parties, sporting events, wine tastings, game parties, etc.

umen.org

Salt Lake Goodtime Bowling League  bit.ly/slgoodtime Stonewall Shooting Sports of Utah  fb.me/stonewall. sportsofutah YOUTH/COLLEGE

Gay-Straight Alliance Network  gsanetwork.org Salt Lake Community College Equality Involvement Club 8 facebook.com/slcc. equality University of Utah LGBT Resource Center 8 lgbt.utah.edu 200 S Central Campus Dr Rm 409 801-587-7973 Univ. of Utah Queer Student Union utahqsu@gmail.com USGA at BYU  byuusga.wordpress.com  fb.co/UsgaAtByu Utah State Univ. Access & Diversity Ctr  usu.edu/ accesscenter/lgbtqa Utah Valley Univ Spectrum  discord.me/ spectrumatuvu  facebook.com/ groups/uvuspectrum Weber State Univ Faculty/Staff GayStraight Alliance  organizations. weber.edu/fsgsa  fsgsa@weber.edu Weber State University LGBT Resource Center  weber.edu/ lgbtresourcecenter 3885 W Campus Dr, Student Services Ctr, Suite 154 Dept. 2125 801-626-7271

Embracing the health & resilience of our community

BOOKS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 43

december 2016 | issue 262 | gaysaltlake.com

the bookworm sez Marylin Forever BY BOZE HADLEIGH C.2016, TAYLOR TRADE $14.95 154 PAGES

People

will talk. And that can be a bad thing: gossip is often mean, and its shelf-life is sometimes longer than we’d like. On the other hand, a bit of scandalous chatter can be great: as in the new book “Marilyn Forever” by Boze Hadleigh, if people are talking about you, they’ll remember you. Through the years, plenty of people have had plenty to say about Marilyn Monroe, both during her career and after her death. Much of the snark was just that: Anne Baxter said she “got fed up” with studio bosses fussing over Monroe and ignoring “those of us who could actually act!” Elizabeth Taylor had nothing good to say about Monroe, and was reportedly scandalized by rumors of Monroe’s affair with another woman. And yet, some saw deep into Monroe’s soul, and they loved her for it. Shirley MacLaine remembers Monroe as being an intelligent woman, despite the personae Monroe cultivated; Jerry Orbach remembers Monroe’s “heart,” and shares a story of what she did for soldiers in Korea. Likewise, Shari Lewis tells of Monroe’s brave stand, in pre-Civil Rights America, on behalf of Ella Fitzgerald. Michael Jackson said that just thinking about Monroe “makes you want to cry.” Just before Monroe died, she was said to be excited about being a new homeowner. She was in perhaps the best shape she’d been in for years, and

was ready for a resurgence of her career. Her death made no sense: did she make a mistake with champagne and drugs? Or was it something more sinister? No one knows, but at least one Hollywood star muses about roles Monroe might have had in her later years, had she still been alive. Will we ever forget her? Will we ever stop talking about Marilyn Monroe? No, says Hugh Hefner, and “… fortunately there’s certainly a lot left to dream about her.” Everyone knows that names hurt just as much as sticks and stones, despite what you once claimed on the playground. But how affected was Marilyn Monroe by the things others said about her? In “Marilyn Forever,” you’ll see. Through this collection of quotes and thoughts on Monroe, author Boze Hadleigh offers a portrait of the star through the eyes of people who knew her and worked with her. As readers might expect, there’s quite a good bit of nastiness here; the claws come out and “meow” fairly drips from those sentences. Monroe, it’s said, was naturally quite hurt by such comments. But Hadleigh doesn’t let those things drive this book. There’s love here, and it’s striking: stories of a make-up artist who, years later, couldn’t bear to discuss his friendship with Monroe. Tears are admitted by “He-Man” types, and more than one star spoke with sympathy about a woman they greatly admired. That gives this book a good balance and further insight to an actress who’s been gone for (can you believe it?) more than five decades. If you’re a fan, time flies and “Marilyn Forever” is a book you won’t stop talking about. Q

CoverGirl Boy ACROSS 1 Olivier of Marathon Man 9 Pose for a Mapplethorpe photo, e.g. 16 Variety store 17 Prop for “I have a headache, honey...” 18 Start of a comment on representing CoverGirl as a gay male, per James Charles 20 Canadian oil company 21 State, to Renee Vivien 22 Word on either bride’s towel 25 Musical based on a John Waters’ film 30 A Chorus Line song 31 Muslim faith 34 Troy Perry and others 35 Dastardly deeds 37 Dakar’s nation 40 More of the comment 42 Removes (oneself) 43 Cause of shrinkage for skinny-dippers 45 Guilty or not guilty, to Perry Mason 46 Drags along 47 Early man’s opening 48 AIDS awareness symbol

52 Pt. of DOS 53 Shakespeare’s “anon” updated 54 Casablanca role for Ingrid 57 End of the comment 65 Kane, for Orson Welles 66 Pious ejaculation 67 Advocate 68 Filling a crack DOWN 1 Non-Judy garland 2 Six in., e.g. 3 AP rival 4 Pink shades 5 Sea eagles 6 Crabs residue 7 Stephen King’s killer canine 8 Meat source Down Under 9 Evita portrayer on stage 10 Dorian Gray creator Wilde 11 Dice markings 12 Curry of The Rocky Horror Picture Show 13 Psychic Geller 14 ___ Tin Tin 15 E. John’s tongue 19 Line of clothing 22 The, to Socrates 23 Lend dignity to 24 Passed up 25 Diced meat 26 Pink Triangle ___

27 Luxury hotel of San Francisco 28 Internet images 29 Big initials in fashion 31 “It’s showtime!” 32 Direction for Rick Rodgers 33 Mauresmo’s do-overs 36 Dangerous emission for Tin Man 37 James VI, e.g. 38 Gallic “she” 39 Moves the head 41 Subj. for John Nash 42 Mo. after March 44 Honey holder 46 Collette of The Hours 49 Mazda competitor 50 Makes holes 51 It was good for Stein in Paris 52 “Sorry to say ...” 54 Queer spelling of an Alaskan dome 55 Gay tune 56 Leave in the text 57 Rudy Galindo’s milieu 58 They come between la’s do’s 59 Gas additive 60 Science course, for short 61 Break for Heather’s mommies 62 Aye, in Versailles 63 Come out on top 64 Will to Grace, or Grace to Will

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46 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | PETS

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q scopes DECEMBER

BY SAM KELLEY-MILLS

ARIES March 20–April 19 The longer wait times experienced in everyday life seem to be a trend you can’t escape right now. No one is actually out to get you, but it is starting to feel as though they are. Learn how to be patient and savor the time it takes to get a task done. While rewards aren’t always a good motivator, a nice surprise is always welcome TAURUS Apr 20–May 20 There comes a breaking point with someone you thought was a good friend. As it turns out, there are a lot of questions and not enough answers to go around. Learn to enjoy the mysteries of life and worry less about explanations. If the answers matter, they are easy to find. If not, then relinquish control and enjoy yourself. GEMINI May 21–June 20 Time is never on your side these days, and it appears that pressure is building in all the wrong ways. Try to stay ahead of the game and make sure to set the tone in your personal relation-

ships. The harder things become, the less easy they are to take. The best way to deal with a relationship matter is to identify what both of you want. CANCER June 21–July 22 You may start to wonder if feeling your way through everything is really the best way to live life. While it is great to experience a deep sense of place and time, there is also a lot in front of you that is being overlooked. Take a moment to see things at face value and try adopting a simple scope. There’s nothing wrong with easing up. LEO July 23–August 22 Look for inspiration in a likely place: a book! While it may seem like old-fashioned advice, there is much to learn by putting away the computer and gadgets and getting back to basics. Whether it is an old fashioned novel or a graphic display of the human body, nothing cures the blues than information that stimulates. Enjoy. VIRGO August 23–Sep. 22 The past has a way of influencing a present decision, but it’s okay as long as you recreate rather than based a current action on past assumptions. The only way to gain a grasp a difficult personal matter is to realize that the

rules have changed. If you don’t follow the new book, then mistakes are bound to happen. Tread carefully. LIBRA Sept 23–October 22 The ultimatums that others are giving you all the time are growing tiresome. Stop letting people tell you what to do, but realize they may simply be a reflection of their perception of you. A partner or lover is wanting more than you are willing to give at the moment, but it’s only because an enigmatic figure has you greatly intrigued.. SCORPIO Oct. 23–Nov. 21 Play fast and loose with a friend who shares a similar interest in a core aspect of your life. There doesn’t seem to be a lot of new connections being made with people these days, but it’s better to focus on quality rather and quantity. Hold tight and make good memories, because they will help you get past an upcoming trial period.. SAGITTARIUS Nov. 22–December 20. Align with a person who gives you strength and comfort. There is a lot of gossip going around, but much of it can be taken as a compliment. A reputation for being tough and controlling stems from your authoritative style. Show off a softer side and those who

admire you will come flocking to help when you need them the most CAPRICORN Dec 21–Jan 19 No one is really caring so much about your shortcomings, but you see them so clearly that it’s creating a sense of paranoia. Shake off the feeling and engulf in a bath of pleasure and new experiences. While it make take some time to shake a creepy feeling, focusing on what makes you happy is bound to take off the edge. AQUARIUS Jan. 20–Feb. 18 A recent change or development in your career is a great source of satisfaction. Enjoy the glow but don’t lose focus on the tasks at hand. There is a great burden lurking in the shadows, and it is growing at every moment. Don’t forget to maintain a healthy life/work balance or things could go spiraling out of control fast. PISCES Feb 19–Mar 19 The current state of the world has become surprising troubling, and the more you try figuring things out, the less likely a big picture is to come together. Get your priorities straight and put the focus on a friend or family member who needs your help. While the world is indeed need of saving, you can’t do everything on your own. Q

december 2016 | issue 262 | PETS

Pet of the Month

Off-Leash Dog Parks

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Chamomile Domestic Short Hair Female, 2-years-old Chamomile is a lovely girl who took excellent care of her five kittens. With her plushy fur and green-gold eyes, she’s adorable. She’ll be delighted to sleep at the end of your bed. She is very smart and active. She does like sitting in the sun where she can watch outside. She likes to be near her favorite people – say on the arm of the couch instead of in a lap. She is very clear when she’s had enough attention. She would love to have access to a good strong scratching post! For more information, go to Best Friends Animal Society — Utah, 2005 S 1100 East, or call 801-574-2454 or go to bestfriendsutah.org