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Equality Utah PAC Endorses
ERIN MENDENHALL
CHRIS WHARTON
SOPHIA HAWES-TINGEY
DUSTIN GETTEL
MARK KINDRED
for Salt Lake City Council - District 5
for Salt Lake City Council - District 3
for Mayor of Midvale City
for Midvale City Council - District 5
for Mayor of South Salt Lake
ANDY BEERMAN
TAYLOR KNUTH
MARCIA WHITE
COREY THOMAS
AMY FOWLER
for Mayor of Park City
for Ogden City Council - Ward 3
for Ogden City Council At-Large A
for South Salt Lake City Council - District 2
for Salt Lake City Council - District 7
NINA MORSE
NICOLE BUTLER
MIRIAH R. ELLIOTT
ROBERT EBERHARD
TINESHA ZANDAMELA
for West Haven City Council District
for Perry City Council
for Ivins City Council
for Clinton City Council
for Provo City Council - District 5
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from the publisher
Giving thanks BY MICHAEL AARON
Thirty
years. That was the first time I marched on the National Mall in Washington, D.C. It was called the “National March on Washington for Lesbian and Gay Rights,” and because so many people attended (police estimated 750,000 but of course the press announced 200,000 before the march even started) it has since been known as “The Great March.” And there I was, October 11, 1987, about as poor as I’d ever been, but I figured out a way to make it happen. I’m thankful for that. I’m thankful I got to hear a young Jesse Jackson become the first presidential candidate to address a gay crowd, calling for finding common ground for humanity. I’m thankful I could hear the words of a personal hero, Cesar Chavez. I’m thankful there were about a dozen friends/activists from Utah joining me on that trip. I’m thankful that I could look around the streets of a large city and see same-sex couples holding hands, armin-arm, and kissing. I’m also thankful I was able to go to the 1993 March on Washington for Lesbian, Gay and Bi Equal Rights and Liberation where I heard RuPaul, Madonna, Eartha Kitt and Martina Navratilova address the crowd of a million beautiful people. I’m thankful I heard Rozalla sing “Everybody’s Free,” making the hair on my arms
stand at the thought that those words may some day ring true. I’m thankful that I grew up in a time when it was necessary to march for our rights. I’m thankful for the highs and lows along the way; the triumphs and the failures. I’m also thankful today, when I am on Utah’s Capitol Hill and hear Democrats and a Republican or two argue eloquently on our behalf. That was a long row to hoe and I’m thankful for having been one of the many hoes. (Take that as you will.) I’m thankful to see young people living their lives openly, honestly and without fear. I’m thankful we have the right to marry; that commercials on television show LGBT people living plain-old-ordinary lives; that songs on the radio speak to my brand of love. I’m thankful that we are finding allies in every religion on the planet. People who will stand up to those around them and say, no — you are wrong. Mostly, I’m thankful for the journey. I’m thankful to have been born at a time when such dramatic change could actually take place, when the work those before me started and I carried along for my turn actually bore fruit. I wouldn’t change the struggles we went through to get where we are today, because the taste of victory is all that more sweet. And for that, I’m thankful. Q
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news The top national and world news you should know from last month Stonewall flies the flag Using the Antiquities Act, President Obama designated a 7.7-acre area which includes the Stonewall Inn, an adjacent park in New York City and its environs as a national monument. A rainbow flag was permanently placed there, which will be maintained by the National Park Service, in a dedication ceremony on National Coming out Day, Oct. 11. Oct. 11 was also the 30th anniversary of the LGBT Rights March on Washington and the first time the AIDS Memorial Quilt was displayed on the National Mall in Washington, D.C.
Hurricane Harvey strikes gay icons Two gay icons, Harvey Fierstein and Nathan Lane, have become involved in the imbroglio over movie producer Harvey Weinstein’s violent and sexually charged behavior. Lane says Weinstein assaulted him by pushing him up against a wall in the theater where Lane was Master of Ceremonies for a birthday celebration for Hillary Clinton in 2000. Weinstein didn’t like a joke Lane had made. Fierstein says he has had messages on Twitter and other social media platforms mistakenly using his last name instead of the miscreant movie guy. Fierstein posted, “I’m a good
Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 273 | NOVEMBER 2017
gay! I mean, a good guy. We’re Mad At Harvey WEINSTEIN, Not Harvey FIERSTEIN!”
STD cases rise again Sexually transmitted disease diagnoses surged to a record high in the USA in 2016, with more than two million cases of Chlamydia, gonorrhea and syphilis.1.6 million of the reported STD involved Chlamydia, with gonorrhea increasing among men and women last year to 470,000 cases. Diagnoses among men increased 22%. Syphilis cases numbered 28,000, increasing nearly 18 percent from 2015 to 2016. Most cases of syphilis occur mainly among men who have sex with men. But women rates of syphilis increased by 36 percent. The survey didn’t address why Chlamydia is a proper noun.
Keep a straight face Two Stanford University professors have created a computer model to use facial recognition data to identify a person’s sexuality. Using data points taken from social media profile pics, the model predicts the sexuality of males 80 percent of the time and females 71 percent of the time. The professors say this is a new use of existing facial recognition technology and requires laboratory control to be effective. In real world use, they say, the percentage of successful identification by algorithm is much lower.
Senators move to recognize LGBT Month US Sen. Tammy Baldwin, D-Wis., along with Sen. Sherrod Brown, D-Ohio, introduced the first-ever Senate resolution recognizing June as “LGBTQ Pride Month.” June was chosen because of the coincidence of, “major milestones in the fight for equal
treatment of LGBT Americans” that occur in the month. Nineteen other U.S. Senators are co-sponsors.
Wonder Woman, Bi GLAAD has started a change. org petition asking Warner Brothers to make Wonder Woman bisexual in the upcoming sequel to the Summer 2017 hit movie. In the comic book, TV series and the movie, Wonder Woman’s alter ego, Diana Prince, has a romantic relationship with Steve Trevor, an American intelligence officer. The movie’s screen writer, Greg Rucka, agrees saying since she came from an Amazon Island, “she must be queer.” GLAAD’s Gianna Collier-Pitts thinks Warner Brothers should acknowledge Diana’s bisexuality. “Wonder Woman’s Diana Prince hails from Themyscira, land of the Amazons and inhabited exclusively by women. This alone should serve as reason enough to confirm her sexuality.” No response from Warner, though unofficially it’s thought they say they just don’t see it.
Lesbian leadership in Germany One of the key figures in Germany’s resurgent far-right party Alternative für Deutschland party is a lesbian mother-oftwo. Dr Alice Weidel lead the AfD to receive 13 percent of the vote, winning 94 of the 709 seats in the Bundestag, the first time a right-wing party will have seats since 1945. Called “dynamic” by German media, she is a former Goldman Sachs banker who speaks Chinese and has used her sexuality on the campaign trail to dispel misunderstanding about AfD. She has tweeted that marriage equality should wait for debate while, “Millions of Muslims illegally immigrate to Ger-
many.” Weidel told re-elected Chancellor, Angela Merkel, that AfD will put a stop to the “invasion of foreigners” after becoming the third largest party in parliament.
Survivor of Chechnya gay concentration camp speaks A gay Russian man has come forward about abuse he suffered at the hands of Chechen authorities. Maxim Lapunov said he and his partner were detained in Grozny, Chechnya’s capital, while he was there for work, according to the AP. At a news conference in Moscow, Lapunov recounted how he was kept in a detention facility for around two weeks and guards beat him with sticks and forced him and his partner to fight one another. “When I would fall, they would give me a break and then force me to stand up and continue for several more rounds,” Lapunov said. “Day after day, they were telling me how precisely they want to kill me.” Lapunov was released only after signing a statement declaring he was gay and promising never to speak of his experiences at the facility. If he did break his silence, authorities said he would be hunted down and killed.
Prince Harry calls for end to HIV testing stigma Prince Harry called on the public to embrace regular testing for HIV/AIDS, as he paid tribute to his late mother’s work in breaking down the stigma attached to the disease. “I believe [Princess Diana] would be telling everyone across society — not just those most at risk — that with effective treatment being free and available in the UK, that we must all embrace regular testing — both for our own sake and for those that we love.”
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CDC admits people with HIV who are undetectable don’t transmit HIV After hundreds of experts and HIV organizations have signed on to a pledge recognizing that people living with HIV whose treatment has brought their viral load to an undetectable level — which is nearly half of all HIV-positive people in the U.S. — do not transmit HIV to any other person, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention has come out with a definitive statement on the subject. In recognition of National Gay Men’s HIV/AIDS Awareness Day, the CDC memo stated, “On this day, we join together in taking actions to prevent HIV among gay and bisexual men and ensure that all gay and bisexual men living with HIV get the care they need to stay healthy.” Gay and bisexual men, the CDC noted, continue to be disproportionately affected by HIV, with, “more than 26,000 gay and bisexual men received an HIV diagnosis in 2015, representing two-thirds of all new diagnoses in the United States, and diagnoses increased among Hispanic/ Latino gay and bisexual men from 2010 to 2014.” Although these findings are certainly disappointing, the letter’s key paragraph is not. Noting that research has shown that antiretroviral therapy both keeps people living with HIV healthy and has a preventative effect, the CDC writes, “When [antiretroviral treatment] results in viral suppression, defined as less than 200 copies/ml or undetectable levels, it prevents sexual HIV transmission.” In other words, HIV suppressed to undetectable levels prevents transmission. “Across three different studies, including thousands
of couples and many thousand acts of sex without a condom or pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP),” the statement continues, “no HIV transmissions to an HIV-negative partner were observed when the HIV-positive person was virally suppressed. This means that people who take ART daily as prescribed and achieve and maintain an undetectable viral load have effectively no risk of sexually transmitting the virus to an HIV-negative partner.” “That is a remarkable statement,” Bruce Richman, executive director of the Prevention Access Campaign’s Undetectable=Untransmittable campaign said, “This is the moment we have been waiting for. The CDC agreed today there is ‘effectively no risk’ of sexually transmitting HIV when on treatment and undetectable. The overwhelming data clearly shows that taking our medication daily protects our health and our partners.“ Richman points out, “this isn’t advising people with HIV and their partners to abandon condoms or PrEP. Being undetectable is another powerful option in the HIV prevention toolbox to be used in combination with other prevention options or independently depending on the circumstances.” He says that awareness of U=U is not only improving people’s social, sexual, and reproductive lives, “it’s changing what it means to live with HIV and will propel us toward ending the epdemic.” “It’s time to make history and share this news,” Richman said as he called on other HIV, LGBT, and sexual and reproductive health organizations to join “the vibrant U=U Community Partner network.” Q
NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 11
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12 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS
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Midterm general election Nov. 7; mail ballots by Nov. 6 General elections will be held Nov. 7 across the state for municipal and special service district offices, including numerous city mayors, county and city council members, water, sewer and parks & rec officials. The following are races many QSaltLake readers are watching:
THIRD CONGRESSIONAL SEAT Also to be decided is the replacement of outgoing Rep. Jason Chaffetz, who resigned June 30 from his Third Congressional Seat, which includes Millcreek, Sandy, most of Utah County and southeast counties of Utah. Provo Mayor JOHN CURTIS is a moderate Republican who made headlines while Provo was considering passing nondiscrimination ordinances. He posted a personal and thoughtful appeal for compassion and unity on his blog for Provo residents. “Every citizen of Provo — whether we realize it or not — associates with someone who publicly or privately identifies as LGBT … They are our friends, our neighbors, our co-workers, our siblings, our children... Even still, for most of my life I’ve made casual judgments about the LGBT community without the benefit of thoughtful consideration. I regret my uninformed judgment.” He finished by writing, “There is so much good in Provo, but sometimes I worry that our kindness is reserved for people who look, act and believe like we do.” The Democrat in the race is K ATHRYN ALLEN, a family doctor. From her website: “The LGBTQIA+ community is a vital part of life in Utah. Marriage equality strengthens families. Discrimination against any group of individuals is un-American.
We should all have the agency to live our lives to the fullest and enjoy the blessings of liberty. Losing our LGBTQ youth to suicide highlights the need for support programs and education to stop this appalling trend. Recently the 7th Circuit Court of Appeals ruled that employment protections for the LGBTQIA+ community are covered by the Civil Rights Act. I support the Equality Act on the Federal level which would remove all doubt about it being illegal to discriminate against the LGBTQIA+ community in housing or employment. Our country has more work to do to insure that LGBTQ folks have equal protections under the law. On a personal level, losing one of my gay friends to AIDS on a bleak Christmas morning is one of the most painful experiences of my life. This experience and others has engendered in me a desire to stand up for the civil rights of the LGBTQIA+ community. Others in the race, including Libertarian JOE BUCHMAN, show no LGBT-specific issues on their websites.
MIDVALE MAYOR ROBERT M. HALE, FB.ME/HALE4MIDVALEMAYOR, EQUALITY UTAH SCORE: 64%
Hale is a former Midvale city councilman and has served on city boards and committees for over 30 years. He has worked for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for much of his career.
SOPHIA HAWES-TINGEY, SOPHIAHAWES. COM, FACEBOOK.COM/SOPHIAFORMIDVALEMAYOR, EQUALITY UTAH SCORE: 100%, EU ENDORSED Hawes-Tingey is a software engineer and US Navy Veteran who moved to Utah in 2010. She has been an LGBT advocate since then, as well as having worked in charge of welcoming for two Unitarian Universalist churches. Her objective is to make Utah a welcoming place, with fairness and opportunity for all, celebration of diversity, access to clean air and water, and excellent education. If elected, she would be the first openly-trans person to hold elected office in the state.
SL CITY COUNCIL DISTRICT 3 — AVENUES/ DOWNTOWN/FEDERAL HEIGHTS CHRISTOPHER WHARTON, VOTECHRISWHARTON.COM, FB.ME/CHRISWHARTONFORSLCCOUNCIL, EU SCORE: 100% EU ENDORSED An attorney whose firm focuses on LGBTQ and family law, Wharton has experience in public service, serving two terms on the Salt Lake City Human Rights Commission and the Utah Pride Center’s
board of directors. Among the lower Avenues resident’s key issues: affordable housing, preserving the character of historic neighborhoods and expanding the city’s environmental initiatives.
PHIL CARROLL, VOTEPHILCARROLL.COM, EU: 93% Carroll is the president of Community Housing Services, which has 200 low-income units in Salt Lake City. He was also chair of the Greater Avenues Community Council for 2 terms, the annual Memory Grove Clean Up for 20 years and the Avenues Street Fair.
LOGAN CITY COUNCIL PAUL ROGERS, FB.ME/VOTEPAULROGERS, EU SCORE: NA
Utah State University research scientist Paul Rogers has worked with both USU and community organizations having served several years on the Bicycle and Pedestrian Advisory Committee, one of those years as its chairman. If elected, Rogers said at this year’s Logan Pride festival that he will make Logan a welcoming community and will work for a better LGBT future.
Equality Utah-endorsed candidates in other races: ERIN MENDENHALL, Salt Lake City Council District 5, FB.ME/ ERINFORCOUNCIL DUSTIN GETTEL, Midvale City Council District 5, FB.ME/ DUSTINFORMIDVALE MARK KINDRED, South Salt Lake Mayor, FB.ME/ KINDREDFORMAYOR ANDY BEERMAN, Park City Mayor, FB.ME/PARKCITYANDY
TAYLOR KNUTH, Ogden City Council Ward 3, FB.ME/TAYLORFOROGDEN MARCIA WHITE, Ogden City Council At-Large A, FB.ME/MARCIAFOROGDEN COREY THOMAS, South Salt Lake City Council, Dist. 2, FB.ME/COREYFORCITYCOUNCIL AMY FOWLER, Salt Lake City Council District 7, FB.ME/VOTEAMYFOWLER NINA MORSE, West Haven City Council FB.ME/ELECTNINAMORSE
NICOLE BUTLER, Perry City Council FB.ME/ELECTNICOLEBUTLER
MIRIAH R. ELLIOTT, Ivins City Council FB.ME/MIRIAH.SORENSONELLIOTT
ROBERT EBERHARD, Clinton City Council, FB.ME/ROBERT4CLINTONCITYCOUNCIL TINESHA ZANDAMELA, Provo City Council District 5, FB.ME/ZANDAMELA4PROVO Q
NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 13
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How LGBT-inclusive are the 3 leading Utah gubernatorial candidates in 2020? According to utahpolicy.com publisher LaVarr Webb, there are three currently viable contenders to become the next governor of Utah. While the gubernatorial election isn’t until 2020, Webb has set eyes on House Speaker Greg Hughes, Lt. Gov. Spencer Cox and Salt Lake County Mayor Ben McAdams. Webb says they are “all working together harmoniously to combat lawlessness, addiction and mental illness, to find housing, money, and new resources for homeless people.” Webb touts only Cox in regard to Utah’s LGBT community, saying, “Cox, assigned by Gov. Gary Herbert as the state’s point person on homelessness, defied conservative Republican stereotypes by speaking sympathetically and eloquently about LGBT issues.” He goes on to say that Cox relates well with rural Utah. An example of each of Webb’s claims follows: In 2016, Rock Magen, a QSaltLake columnist, wrote: “I am reminded of the Orlando vigil here in SLC, and the words spoken by Lt. Governor Spencer Cox. Although this elected official does not define himself as part of our community, he speaks words which I believe should be echoed throughout SLC’s history; ‘You have treated me with the kindness, dignity and respect — the love — that I very often did not deserve,’ he said. ‘And it has made me love you.’” Cox, in the prior year, 2015, traveled to Delta, Utah twice to offer state support of the sheriff’s efforts in an unusual and saddening case of a young gay man, Rick Jones, who falsely reported
anti-gay hate crimes that he executed upon himself. “The original allegations were incredibly troubling, and not representative of the love and compassion the people of Utah exhibit daily,” Cox said in a statement. “I am proud of the overwhelmingly positive
Spencer Cox
response and support from Delta and every corner of our state. Today, our concern is that the young man and his family receive the love and help necessary to find the peace and healing they seek.” Salt Lake County Mayor Ben McAdams should also be recognized for his support of the LGBT community. In 2011, McAdams sponsored legislation that would protect against bias based on sexual orientation and gender identity in the workplace and housing. Although the bills never made it out of committee, McAdams said, “I am proud of my work at the Capitol as an ally for minority communities. I stand my ground while building common ground.” “Prior to my election to the Senate, I worked to preserve Salt Lake City’s nondiscrimination ordinances against threats of the legislature to overturn these important protections,” he continued.
In 2012, Equality Utah endorsed McAdams in the mayoral race he currently holds, and in a letter welcoming the 2014 Utah Pride Festival he said, “I’m proud of the progress Salt Lake County has made to advance civil rights and equality for
Ben McAdams
all families and individuals in our community. We’ve seen advances, but there is more work to do. Thank you for all you do to make the event meaningful and enjoyable to everyone in the LGBT community and beyond. He was also awarded with the Utah Pride Festival’s Pete Suazo
Political Action Award. House Speaker Greg Hughes, on the other hand, is less LGBT-friendly. He, along with 79 other Republicans, filed a 2014 brief with the U.S. Supreme Court asking them to hear Utah’s same-sex marriage case and to reverse Judge Robert Shelby’s decision that Amendment 3 was unconstitutional. However, Webb calls
Greg Hughes
Hughes “more demonstrative” than McAdams and Cox. “But he may also be more likely to get into trouble,” he continues. “He would need to assure Utahns that he would be a safe governor. It’s okay to send a firebrand to Congress, but Utahns seem to like a father figure for governor.” Q
14 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS
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Utah’s No Promo Homo law is now history Equality Utah Executive Director Troy Williams declared “Utah’s No Promo Homo law is now history,” in an email blast to the group’s supporters. Last year Equality Utah and three student plaintiffs filed a lawsuit against the State Board of Education to challenge Utah’s No Promo Homo law. For nearly 20 years, Utah law prohibited the use of educational material that includes “advocacy of homosexuality,” and educators couldn’t discuss homosexuality in the Equality Utah Executive state’s public schools. Director Troy Williams The law also required the teaching of “abstinence before marriage … and prohibits the advocacy of sexual activity outside of marriage.” “Today, we are pleased to announce that we have reached a final settlement with the State Board and the Attorney General’s office,” wrote Williams. In a nearly unanimous vote, the Utah Legislature repealed the state’s No Promo Homo law with SB 196 earlier this year. The Utah State Board of Education issued a letter, dated Sept. 18, to all Utah public and charter schools clarifying the intent of SB 196.
REAL ESTATE
‘No Promo Homo’ plaintiffs Katy Smith-Gish, Josh Greer and Kaiden Turkel with mom, Anna, at the Equality Utah Allies dinner, September 30. PHOTO COURTESY EQUALITY UTAH
“The Utah State Board of Education desires each student in Utah public schools to receive a high quality education free from all manner of discrimination, which can take the form of bullying, based on religion, race, ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, and gender identity. Further, we are aware that some local education agencies still maintain old policies that do not reflect the recent changes to [new Utah law language], and federal law. Such outdated policies based on older versions of [Utah and federal law] are invalid,” the letter directed, adding that noncompliance would result in “Corrective Action and Withdrawal or Reduction of Program Funds.” “This is a remarkable achievement,” Williams said. “In our country’s history, Utah is only one of two states that has ever repealed a ‘No Promo Homo’ law. The other state is California.” Williams announced the end of the lawsuit as Equality Utah filed motion asking Judge Benson to close the case. “We want to thank the Utah State
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Board of Education for their strong statement in support of all Utah students. We also want to thank Senator Adams and the Utah Legislature for taking decisive and fair action on this issue,” Williams continued. “We are grateful to our legal team at the nonprofit National Center for Lesbian Rights and the international law firm of Ropes and Grey. They tirelessly offered their services pro bono to advance this effort.” Equality Utah’s legal advisor, professor Clifford Rosky, was the person responsible for the research and analysis that laid the foundation for the lawsuit and the legislature’s repeal. Williams ended by thanking the plaintiffs, who until the group’s Allies Dinner last Saturday were unnamed. The plaintiffs were Katy Smith-Gish, Josh Greer and Kaiden Turkel. “By telling their stories, they risked being identified, targeted, and bullied,” Williams wrote. “They risked it all, to stand up for us, and they turned the tide.”
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Biskupski presents Keys to the City to Kendall, Bastian Salt Lake City Mayor Jackie Biskupski chose National Coming Out Day to honor longtime LGBT activist Kate Kendall and philanthropist Bruce Bastian with a Key to the City In honoring Kendall and Bastian, the Mayor noted their long-time advocacy on behalf LGBT in Utah and nationally. Kendall is executive director of the San Francisco-based National Center for Lesbian Rights. Bastian has taken a lead role in supporting the Human Rights Campaign and the campaign against Prop 8 in California. After graduating from BYU, Bastian co-founded WordPerfect, an early gold standard in word processing software. After selling the company, Bastian devoted himself to philanthropy and activism, supporting local and national LGBT equality efforts. His philanthropy, through the Bruce Bastian Foundation is PHOTO BY CAT PALMER
broadly based in arts, social welfare as well as LGBT organizations. Utah remains his home. Long time friend and associate, Senator James Dabakis, said in introduction, “Bruce has not only been a leader for Salt Lake City and the LGBTQ community over the last generation, I doubt there is a single person in our entire state who has not benefited from his vision and generosity.”Dabakis says, “I shudder to think what our community would be like without his influence and smile.” The mayor noted, “For decades, Bruce created a safe space for LGBTQ people at home, and through his generosity helped make Utah an epicenter of the LGBTQ movement.” Bastian accepted, saying, “I think most people in life just want to be who they are, they just want to be happy. I don’t think people can be
happy if they aren’t authentic and that’s what I want to help support.” Two Utah LGBT luminaries, Jane Marquardt and Carol Gnade, introduced Kate Kendall with reminisces about her activity as a student at Weber State University and counsel for the Utah ACLU. After the ACLU stint, where Gnade is a former been director, Kendall become the ED of the NCLR. Long time leader and activist, Marquardt observed Kendall is surrounded by fans and admirers, “Because
in addition to her eloquence, brilliance and strategic thinking about issues of civil rights, she has a magnetic ability to make people feel appreciated, to make them feel needed, to make them feel loved.” “Kate has been a driving force behind the strategy which has transformed the legal landscape for LGBTQ people across the country,” said Mayor Biskupski. “Kate has never forgotten where she is from, using her considerable talent and knowledge to ensure LGBTQ Utahns are thoroughly protected.” “This day and this event go down in my very blessed life as the most spectacular thing I have ever been a part of,” said Kendall. “To be in a room with some of my closest friends and family—including my great friend the mayor—and to receive my first ever Key to the City was a stunner in every way.” The Key to the City is presented by the Mayor to those using “their voices, talents, or resources to improve the local community in significant ways.” This is only the third time Mayor Biskupski has offered the award, previously honoring local artist Jann Haworth and restaurateur Tom Guinney. Q
Utah Pride Center elects 2018 board executive committee members At its monthly board meeting, the Utah Pride Center Board of Directors elected its executive committee members for the 2018 fiscal year. Retaining the position of board chair is Sue Robbins. Robbins is a Lead Test Engineer at L3 Technologies. She moved to Utah in 2004. She has been on the Board since 2015. Rob Moolman is now the vice chair. He is an Education Consultant at the Human
Rights and Equal Opportunities Commission and has lived in South Africa and Australia.. Tim Johns remains as secretary. He is Vice President of Development for Planned Parenthood Association of Utah, and completed his masters degree from New York University in nonprofit management. Jason Suker ramains as treasurer. He is a data analyst at SelectHealth with an MS in Information Systems.
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Q mmunity Halloween party will warp minds and support the Utah Pride Center A “techno-retro, space-disco warehouse dance party” will be held in support of the Utah Pride Center at the Infinity Event Center on Saturday, Oct. 28 starting at 9 p.m. “Mind Warp” features DJ Lishus and DJ Robot Dream with entertainment by Voodoo Productions, drag performances, VIP lounge with table service and gogo dancers. Costumes are required. Tickets are $25 general admission, $50 VIP and $100 major donor. A $300 All Night Package: includes 2 VIP tickets to the event, 2 admissions to the private after party hosted next door to the venue from 1:30–5 a.m., a bottle of champagne and a room at the newly renovated Hotel RL just one block away from the venue Tickets are available at bit.ly/UPCMindWarp
Alt. Garden Club planning British Invasion and other events On Wednesday, Nov. 1 at 7:30 p.m., the Alternative Garden Club will be giving a presentation on the Chelsea Flower Show. The club will be discussing the possibility of a trip to England to see the show in 2018. The garden design event is equivalent to Paris Fashion Week. The show, founded in 1862, attracts more than 150,000 visitors each year, including members of the Royal Family. The AGC also has two events coming up on Saturday,
Nov. 11, in the Parish Hall of St. Paul’s Episcopal Church at 261 S. 300 East: 9 a.m. - Utah Associated Garden Clubs Fall Meeting. RSVP required as breakfast will be provided. 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. - “Sowing the Seeds of Leadership.” Robin Pokorski hosts a workshop on leadership skills, growing a volunteer organization, and dealing with difficult people. Cost is $10 for garden club members, and $20 for nonmembers and includes lunch. The annual AGC Holiday Pot Luck will be held the evening of Saturday, Dec. 2 at a location TBD.
Transgender Day of Remembrance Transgender Day of Remembrance will be Monday, Nov. 20 starting at 5:30 p.m. at the First Unitarian Church of Salt Lake City, 569 S. 1300 East. Light refreshments will be provided. Potluck following service. Please bring a dish, dessert, etc.
Urban Flea Market moves indoors for the Winter The Urban Flea Market, Downtown Salt Lake City’s biggest flea market, moves indoors for the winter season. Sunday, Nov. 20 starting at 10 a.m. at The Gateway, The Urban Flea Market will transform large indoor retail spaces into an indoor winter flea market featuring 70+ vendors offering the best eclectic and
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Utah Stonewall Historical Society presents 1977 We will be covering a pivotal year in Utah’s early Gay Community building. Bars were crowded ... Disco was blaring and everyone was dancing before the coming storm. November 1 at the Salt Lake City Library Marmalade Branch, 5th North and 3rd West, from 7 to 8:30 p.m. Hosted by Ben Williams. unique vintage and antique finds. Local crafters will provide cool handcrafted and upcycled vintage items. There will be music, local food trucks Poutine Your Mouth and Three Brothers Tacos will be grilling favorites throughout the day, along with coffee, cold beverages and snacks at our market commissary. Admission is $2. Free parking is available in the Gateway ‘North’ Parking garage and surrounding streets. Vendor information and additional market dates and details are on the website at www.fleamarketslc.com.
Support group for families of transitioning adults As our society moves toward greater acceptance of the broad spectrum of gender identity, people are finding it easier to come out and be true to their core selves. Creating safe spaces for families and friends to process a person’s transition can be an integral part of a successful and healthy transition and strengthen relationships. Jack Haden, LCSW and Jania Sommers, LCSW are putting together a support
group called Supportive Transitions. This three-week course beginning Monday, October 16, will help people learn how to advocate for their family member or friend, and connect with others who can empathize with the complex emotions that arise with such a change. For more information, an article by Haden is on our website at bit.ly/transsupportslc and you can contact them at jackhaden85@gmail.com or janiasommers. LCSW@gmail.com
Rocky Horror at the Tower Might be the first time Gay or Transgender person was shown in a positive light on the big screen was the Rocky Horror Picture show. The 1975 cult classic returns to the Tower Theatre for this annual October event. Barry Bostwick and Susan Sarandon star as newlyweds Brad and Janet, lost in a rainstorm and seeking shelter in the castle of Dr. Frank-N-Furter (Tim Curry), a mad scientist from the planet Transsexual Transylvania. The SLSF benefit tickets are $15 each. Buy Tix and check times for all screenings between October 20 and 31 at: buff.ly/2xF0Qvo Q
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Gay Utahn killed and boyfriend hurt during Las Vegas massacre
On Sunday, boyfriends Cameron Robinson and Bobby Eardley drove from their St. George home to a music festival in Las Vegas. It was a drive Robinson knew very well, as he commuted to his job as management analyst for the City of Las Vegas every working day since they became a couple in 2014. Sunday night, Eardley would watch his boyfriend die before his eyes from a gunshot wound to the neck, shot by a man 400 yards away on the 32nd floor of the Mandalay Bay hotel. Eardley would also be rushed to the hospital as he was bleeding from shrapnel in his lower back. In all, at least 59 people were killed and over 500 injured by the shooter. Eardley is now back home now with his three children from an earlier marriage. He didn’t feel up to talking with QSaltLake about his ordeal. He just wants to come to terms with his new life without the love of his life. Eardley’s mother, Joyce, told the New York Daily News that Robinson “loved life” and was like a second father to her three young grandchildren. “He loved people and to serve people — he was a character, he had us all laughing. We could be in the dumps and then he’d have us all in laughter,” she told the News. “A great loss of a great man.” Robinson’s sister, Meghan Ervin, wrote on Facebook that she was able to go to Vegas and take care of her brother’s remains through the Eardley family. “Today to go say goodbye to you! I was never supposed to say goodbye to you, little brother … you were supposed to take over the world,” she wrote. Robinson was raised in Henderson, Nevada, graduating from Basic High School. He received an MBA in 2015 after graduating from Nevada State College in business administration and management. For the past four years, he has worked for the City of Las Vegas most recently as a management analyst. He also worked as a floral designer for the past nine years. Robinson and Eardley were both run-
ners, participating in several marathons in Southern Utah and surrounding states. Elizabeth Eldredge remembered Robinson on Facebook. “You’ll never know just how much you cheered me up by meeting me at the bottom of that last long hill in the Grand Teton [Half Marathon] and bringing us all home to the finish ... together. You rocked that run! You’ll stay in my heart forever,” she wrote. “And to Bobby — I’m sending you love and light in this tragic and life-changing time. I hope you recover, as I know the emotional scars will last long beyond the physical. Hugs and hope as we all struggle to make sense of this devastating, and untimely, loss.” Bobby Eardley has worked at Ken Garff St. George since 1999 and is now a parts manager. He enjoys fishing and hunting, according to his Facebook profile. The family has set up a GoFundMe to
help pay for Robinson’s funeral expenses and Eardley’s hospital expenses.
OTHER UTAHNS Other victims from Utah: Heather Alvarado, 35, was a married mother of three from Cedar City, Utah. “It is with heavy hearts that we acknowledge the passing of Heather Warino Alvarado, wife of Cedar City firefighter Albert Alvarado,” Sgt. Jerry Womack, a spokesman for the police department in Cedar City, Utah, said in a statement to the Salt Lake Tribune. Neysa Tonks grew up in the Salt Lake City area and attended Brighton High School before moving to Las Vegas, according to her Facebook page. Tonks was an employee of Technologent, a provider of enterprise-class technology solutions for Fortune 1000 companies, according to a GoFundMe account established by the company on behalf of Tonk’s family. Q
Man arrested for the murder of Matt Holt pleads guilty The man arrested for the murder of Matt Holt accepted a plea deal in court Wednesday. Jeffery Shepherd’s attorney entered the plea, which reduced an aggravated murder charge to murder, taking the death penalty of the table. He faces 15 years to life for the crime. Jeffrey SHepherd Shepherd, 35, was arrested May 15 in his home in Tooele for
the Easter Sunday murder of Holt in the area of 3200 South and 9th West. Shepard was originally charged with suspicion of first degree murder, first degree aggravated robbery, and second degree felony tampering with evidence counts. A probable cause statement said that he waived his Miranda rights and confessed that he demanded cash from Holt at gunpoint and shot him after he received the money. He disposed of the shell casing and gun as well as his clothing and washed the blood from his car. The plea deal means the public will not learn the details of the murder, but also spares friends and family of a trial.
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views
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quotes “They didn’t think anyone would watch a lesbian during the day. [Keeping my sexuality quiet] was really not just implied it was verbal … I remember there was something that happened to my finger and I was in a relationship and I was going to say ‘we’ and they wouldn’t let me say ‘we.’” – Ellen DeGeneres to Ryan Seacrest on the one little word she was forbidden from saying on TV.
“We snuck in. We were in your living room every week and, ‘Isn’t that one so funny?’ and ‘I like him.’ Old women that had never met a gay man in their life were like, ‘I hope Will finds a nice boy.’ It permeated American culture slowly but surely, and all the more reason that we have to come back and remind people that that’s why we got where we got — that’s why we got to a place where gay marriage was passed, that marriage equality was passed as a right in 50 states.” — Eric McCormack, speaking about the cultural impact of Will & Grace
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who’s your daddy
The most fabulous of all BY CHRIS KATIS
We have
a joke in my family that my brother Dan is our mom’s favorite. Notice she’s making Greek spare ribs for dinner for the first time in six months? Ask her if Dan’s in town. See fireworks in a park near her house? Ask when he arrived. Now, I have to say my siblings — including Dan — think this is hysterical, but I’m not so sure our mom is all that amused. She vehemently denies she has a favorite. And so do I. I tell my sons all the time that I dislike both of them equally. I’m kidding, I’m kidding! Interestingly enough, the boys find that much funnier than my mom does. Since I don’t have a favorite child, I suppose I could tell you how GR Kitchen is my new favorite place for quick Greek food. The ingredients are fresh, the cuisine tasty and the prices reasonable. And I guess I could say that Bloods Lake is my favorite hiking place because it’s one of the few areas in Big Cottonwood Canyon that allows dogs. (The lake is actually in Summit County, thus not in the watershed.) The hike isn’t too strenuous, there are a lot of dogs for Skeelo to play with, and the scenery is magnificent. But I’d rather tell you why my family is fabulous. Take Gus for example: at 14-years old, he is the polar opposite of me at that age. He’s a total jock. He lives for hockey and aspires to play in the NHL, but will play in the minor leagues if need be. He’s even thinking that hockey may be his ticket to a college education. He also loves paintball, and wears the welts from other players guns like a badge of honor! In fairness, he regales us with stories of his own blistering hits on the competition. But very much like me, he has absolutely no tolerance for discrimination against anyone for any reason. He has no qualms calling out people — even adults — if they make a racist comment. And I’m extremely proud of his reaction to hearing that a kid he knew in Kindergarten is transitioning genders. Using the correct pronoun, he exhibited compassion and acceptance
beyond his years by simply stating, “I hope she’ll be happy.” And then there’s Niko. I love the fact that he marches to the beat of his own drum. Niko doesn’t care what people think, which I greatly admire. He’ll be the first to tell you there is no such thing as a “boy” color or a “girl” color. Just last night when they were discussing their dream cars, Niko admitted that he longs for a pink Hummer with black racing stripes. He also possesses an unwavering dedication to the school’s choir — never misses a practice, and looks forward to each and every performance. This in and of itself is a miracle. One of my favorite photos of Niko is when he was in Pre-K, dressed as a fairy for his then school’s musical rendition of “A Midsummer Night’s Dream,” his arms folded, refusing to sing a solitary note or dance one step, glaring at his Good for the entire family. parents in silent Not valid with any other offers. protest. Nowadays, he’s worried that the audience may be too small for his mighty talents! Frankly, there are many restaurants, book stores, hikes, museums, and destinations beyond GR Kitchen and Bloods Lake in and around Salt Lake that I Located in Bountiful think are amazing. and Salt Lake City But if I’m being truthful, part of Salt Lake Bountiful their appeal for me 2150 S. Main St 104 425 S. Medical Dr 211 — really the biggest 801-883-9177 801-397-5220 part — is that I get to enjoy them with www.alpenglowdentists.com my family. By far, they’re the most To schedule an appointment, please call 801.878.1700 fabulous of all. Q Evening and Saturday Appointments Available
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lambda lore
1976: The Gay Student Union Emerges The 1970s BY BEN WILLIAMS
were the origin of a gay social revolution in Utah. Activists, teeming with idealism and social consciousness, thought they could make a better world. By 1976 the gay landscape of Utah had changed dramatically from 1969, with 24 gay-identified organizations, businesses and publications; whereas at the beginning of the decade there had only been one, the Utah Gay Liberation Front. Important organizations formed in 1976 were the Gay Service Coalition, the Imperial Court of the Wasatch Empire, Women Aware and the University of Utah’s Gay Student Union. At the beginning of 1976, the growing community was still serviced by two religious organizations — the Metropolitan Community Church of Salt Lake City and its splinter church, the Grace Christian Church. The gay media — essential to building community — was basically a California-based The Advocate, whose editor was a former Utah LDS missionary named Robert I. McQueen and Utah’s Salt Lick published by the Gay Community Service Center. As the year began, the board of Trustees of the GCSC, however, changed the name to the Gayzette, with Babs DeLay as its editor. The Gayzette ended when the community center closed, but by the end of the year the Open Door was published by the Gay Service Coalition. Interestingly, the Salt Lake Tribune recognized the societal changes taking place, when on Jan.8, 1976, they opined, “Two women who had applied for a marriage license in Salt Lake County probably should have been issued one, according to Utah law. Utah statute does not specifically prohibit marriage between members of the same sex, a spokesman in the Salt Lake County Attorney office said.” The women were referred to the county attorney when they attempted to obtain a license but didn’t go. One can only speculate what would have happened if they had. There were six gay bars at the beginning of the year: Radio City Lounge, the Sun Tavern, Sweetwater Tavern, the Rusty Bell, Sisters and the Sunset Room. They were
soon joined by a new gay bar called The Name of the Game Jr. which had changed from a straight bar to a gay bar because the owners said, “Gays get down a lot more and are less trashy than some of the straight street people we get in here.” The bar even offered free drinks on Mondays and Tuesdays from 8–10 p.m., for “ladies” and “men in drag” — a first for any gay bar. One of the more important organizations founded in 1976 was the Gay Student Union, the forerunner of the University of Utah’s current Queer Student Union. Responding to a Daily Utah Chronicle’s article, “Homosexuals Discuss Gayness and Society,” Paul Larson wrote a letter to the editor to promote his new organization. In part it said, “Of interest to Chronicle readers are some of the activities of the Campus Christian Center, 232 University Street. We are offering an ongoing Gay Consciousness Raising Group and a two-part presentation on Gay History and Literature, Sunday evenings.” Larson formed he Gay Consciousness Raising Group to show gay people that “they were not alone in their homosexuality” and to help people “adjust and learn to cope with living in a heterosexual society.” The group was also designed as “an alternative to the gay bars and the parks,” and, “as a setting where members of the gay community and any heterosexual who wishes to attend can relate to each other as complete people instead of simply as sex objects.” Additionally, Larson’s course on “Group Dynamics” at the University of Utah was probably the first real gay lecture ever presented in Salt Lake City. In Sept. 1976, the first workshop for the gay community was held by the GCRG at St. Mark’s Cathedral. Twenty people attended with Hal Carter and Paul Larson facilitating. At the beginning of the University’s fall quarter an average of 40 to 50 people were attending the group each week. By October, the meeting, which had started out with six people, grew to an extent that the original group had to split. One of these groups left the Campus Christian Center
to meet in the Student Union Building and called themselves the “Gay Awareness-Conscious Raising Encounter Group,” formed to talk openly about “their hang ups, of pressures put on by society, and family and religion, and to express their hopes, dreams and long term goals.” The student leaders of the Gay Awareness-Conscious Raising Encounter Group then pushed to have their group listed as a campus club. On Nov.3 1976, the club was formally placed on the University register by the Committee on Student Affairs as “The Gay Student Union.” Its first formal meeting had 46 people attending the session. The Gay Student Union’s stated purpose was to “promote and maintain activities and ideas supportive to gay rights and gay people through combating gay oppression and promoting gay dignity, unity and liberation.” The format of the club was still a “rap group” designed for “getting people together, sharing feelings, and ideas.” The Gay Student Union sponsored the Gay Awareness-Conscious Raising Encounter Group and met every Monday at 7:30 p.m., in Orson Spencer Hall. Membership in the Gay Student Union was open to anyone who supported the goals of the Gay Student Union and was not limited to students, although its officers had to be enrolled on campus. In one bylaws meeting, the Gay Student Union considered admitting any Brigham Young University student, faculty, or staff member with a valid identification card to any activity in lieu of an official membership card due to the ongoing persecution of gays enrolled at BYU. These “peer” discussion meetings of the Gay Student Union consisted of a “getting acquainted section” and then breakout sessions where issues relevant to the gay community were read and discussed. These sections were divided into four groups with one person in each room designated as a facilitator to keep the discussion topic focused. If one of the discussion groups did not meet the needs of those attending then that person could change sections. The Chronicle featured three stories in the fall of 1976 on the new gay club. On Nov. 1o, 1976, an article entitled “Gay Group Discusses Social Bars,” stated “Salt Lake City is unique in that it is one of the places in the United States where people are concerned about the oppression of homosexuality.” Q
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guest editorial
Let it go and be with us
VIEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 21
No f**king Cornucopias
BY FORMER UTAH STATE SEN. STEVE URQUHART
Last month,
you can be truly happy. There are so many great ones to pick the Mormon Church gathered from! You’ve been taught to the Saints to declare that God follow feelings to find truth. is against gay marriage. Consider boldly doing that. On the one hand, I’m Seek people who love you— bummed. Thursday, my wife really love you, not a lip-serand I were arguing. I said, “I viced love while you are being think the Church is okay with pushed away and told you gay marriage now. Seriously. are lesser. The reservoirs of Pro gay marlove in Utah and riage. I heard it the world are “I know lots of from a guy.” immense! Find my LGBTQ peeps She’s all like, them! “Uh-uh.” The rest of us are hurt by the I’m like, “Uhneed you to find unnecessary — and huh.” love. We need intentional — She’s like, you. We love “Uh-uh!” hammering. I mourn you! I’m like .... When with you. But, I Anyway. Sara and I ask you to consider Turns out, heard about they’re still the apostolic something: stop against it. Who Scotch blessing/ worrying about it, and beat down, knew?! I’m out 10 we decided to take a better path” bucks on a bet. throw a party. (But, I’m gonna pay Sara We had 200 of our bestest, in loose change — mostly beautifulest, gayest, lesbianest, pennies — so kinda totally transgenderest, drag queenworth it). est peeps and allies over to On the other hand, whatour great and spacious 20th ever. floor condo overlooking the I know lots of my LGBTQ Temple and the Conference peeps are hurt by the unCenter for an epic party and necessary — and intentional some warm fellowship! I wish — hammering. I mourn with anyone and everyone who is you. But, I ask you to consider hurting could have felt the something: stop worrying love and happiness. Life is about it, and take a better good! It really is. path. That works. It really God bless my queer peeps! does. You are so beautiful and I don’t deny your pain. I wonderful! And God bless know it is real. I bear testimo— really bless — people who ny that it is real. So, so, so real. don’t yet know how beautiful And really destructive. and wonderful all of God’s Consider letting it go, by children are. Some of us do. taking a path in life where Come be with us. Q
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Jeff Mateer Most
D’ANNE WITKOWSKI
Americans don’t spend a lot of time thinking about this country’s court system. If you’re lucky, you don’t have a lot of direct contact with the courts. The most privileged among us don’t even really have to think about it. The judicial system is like a sewer system: if it’s working okay then it’s largely outof-sight out-of-mind. But when it gets clogged up with garbage everybody is sorry they didn’t take better care of it and check on it sooner. And clogging our courts up with garbage is just what Donald Trump is doing. He’s outsourced the judge-picking to far right groups who have been giving him names of extremists that he is dutifully nominating. They are unfit for the bench, but when you’re the president, they let you do it. One of these nominees is Jeff Mateer who has been nominated for a lifetime seat on the U.S. District Court for the Eastern District of Texas. And he is a nightmare. In a video put together by the People for the American Way, Mateer calls homosexuality “the elephant in the room” and bemoaned “the agenda that this small group is seeking and imposing on the rest of us.” According to this man, who Trump wants to make a judge forever, LGBTQ people are not protected by the Constitution. “I’ve read the 14th Amendment thousands of times,” he says in a recording. “I don’t see anything about right to same sex marriage, I don’t see anything saying right to homosexuality, I don’t see anything about right to privacy.” No doubt he thinks it perfectly all right to tell a lesbian couple, “We’re not going to rent to you” or refusing to make a cake for a gay couple’s wedding citing religious freedom. He also believes in so-called “reparative therapy,” which has been thoroughly debunked by medical experts but is still embraced by those who believe that you can just “pray the gay away.” The worst is what he has to say about transgender kids and their audacity to fight for the right to use the restroom at school.
“It just shows you how Satan’s plan is working and the destruction that’s going on,” Mateer says. Mara Keisling, the executive director of the National Center for Transgender Equality, isn’t having it. “How dare he?” Keisling asks. “How dare anyone talk about children this way? This nomination is another slap in the face to hundreds of thousands of families across the country and their children who are transgender. How can they explain to their children that a public official, let alone a judge, speaks about them this way? This nominee simply cannot be confirmed.” In a letter signed by 278 parents of transgender children from 36 states, Mateer is encouraged to apologize and invited to withdraw his nomination. “Hundreds of thousands of children and adolescents throughout this country are transgender, like our kids” the letter reads. “Like all children—like your children, Mr. Mateer—they deserve to grow up knowing that they are loved and supported. Your statements about children like ours are the opposite of love—they are cruel. We urge you to apologize sincerely and without reservation to us and our families and all the others like us, and to clearly articulate how wrong and damaging your words are to children like ours—or to withdraw your nomination.” Of course, that’s like imploring the fox to be nice to the chickens now that he has the key to the coop. The radical right doesn’t exactly have a history of showing mercy to LGBTQ people. Elections have consequences. And when Trump is finally gone his legacy will live on in conservative anti-LGBTQ judges across the country and in the Supreme Court that will shape the legal landscape for generations to come. Some of the battles we thought we won will have to be fought again. The most effective weapon against this? Vote. Q D’Anne Witkowski is a poet, writer and comedian living with her wife and son. She has been writing about LGBT politics for over a decade. Follow her @MamaDWitkowski.
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guest editorial
We can’t let Sessions drive trans people back to sex work BY DIANA FELIZ OLIVA
Just three
years ago, I was unemployed. Even though I had an Ivy League education from Columbia University, I spent two whole years searching for a job. The problem wasn’t that I wasn’t qualified — it was the immense discrimination I faced for my gender identity. From 2012 to 2015, I had to resort to survival sex work. My experience is all too common in the transgender community. In 2015, the U.S. Transgender Survey reported that the unemployment rate among transgender people was three times higher than that of the total U.S. population and that nearly one-third of the transgender population was living in poverty — more than twice the rate in the U.S. The discrimination faced by transgender people creates compounding issues. From finding a job to being the target of hate crimes, our marginalization directly impacts our ability to survive. This discrimination manifests itself in more ways than unemployment and regular, hostile treatment — it translates to an increased risk of HIV, homelessness, substance abuse, and suicide. So when Attorney General Jeff Sessions stood poised to gut lifesaving employment protections for transgender individuals, I felt a heightened urgency to share my story. Though my days of unemployment are behind me, my work as the Transgender Health Program Manager at St. John’s Well Child and Family Center in Los Angeles feels more
urgent than ever. I can tell you: There is hope — but it demands that you join the fight. Until 2014, there was little communal effort or opportunity to improve the lives of transgender people. That year, St. John’s made history by becoming the first and only community health center in south Los Angeles to offer an economic and professional development program called Trans* Empower Program, which has grown from serving just five transgender job seekers to over 700 today. St. John’s is one of the few trans-specific health centers in the United States that is committed to supporting the basic human right to health, employment, education, and housing for all individuals regardless of gender identity and expression, providing low or no cost health care to individuals in need. St. John’s program has evolved rapidly to address transgender individuals’ multifaceted needs. In just three years, St. John’s has expanded program hours and our service, including workshops on résumé building, interview preparation, professional attire, job placement, job fairs, and legal name changes. Prior to the Obama administration, many transgender people faced discrimination in employment settings. Our programs were a direct response to counteract that rampant discrimination. We must accept nothing less than a complete elimination of this pervasive inhumanity; we must work continuously and strenuously together for justice. Q Diana Feliz Oliva is the transgender health program manager at St. John’s Well Child and Family Center.
Family, Criminal and LGBT Law A down-to-earth law firm that aims for solutions, not fights. We help you develop the most cost-effective strategy to meet your goals for your case. Our mission is to give a voice to underrepresented people and to empower our clients through a wide variety of legal services. Our tool box includes cooperative negotiation and aggressive advocacy, depending on what the situation calls for.
Danielle Hawkes, Esq. The Salt Lake Lawyers
801-590-7555 office 801-243-5669 cell 10 E. Exchange Place, Suite 622 Salt Lake City, UT 84111 danielle@thesaltlakelawyers.com www.thesaltlakelawyers.com ESPAÑOL, PORTUGUÉS
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Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 273 | NOVEMBER 2017
Military trans couple to keynote UPC’s annual Genderevolution Conference
The Utah
Pride Center’s annual Genderevolution Conference faces a dark and threatening storm this year. Though many stepping stones have been placed in recent years, the transgender and nonbinary communities of Utah and the United States are once again egregiously under attack. Earlier this year, President Trump reinstated a ban on transgender Americans serving in the U.S. military, the one that former-president Obama overturned with proper haste. Additionally, while several state’s laws progressed with implementing gender-free public restrooms and more affordable and accessible gender-reassignment procedures, a seemingly firestorm of backlash over recent months has been discouraging at the least. For instance, Ally Steinfeld, a transgender teen who was stabbed, mutilated and burned, was dating a woman allegedly involved in the gruesome crime. The Kansas City Star reported that “Briana Calderas, 24, began dating Steinfeld about a week before her death,” according to Amber Steinfeld, the slain girl’s mother. One charged assailant, Andrew Vrba, 18, admitted that he tried to poison Steinfeld. When she didn’t drink the liquid, he stabbed her multiple times, gouging out her eyes and stabbing her genitals, according to court documents. The Star reported that for the past three years, LGBT advocacy groups have tallied the killings of more than 20 transgender people in the United States. Yet state or federal hate crime laws are rarely used to prosecute the slayings. Now many LGBT-rights groups are questioning the effectiveness of the laws, saying they sometimes focus too tightly on individual acts without addressing underlying bias or wider violence. Steinfeld’s death thrust the volatile issue back into the spotlight.
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Additionally, earlier this year the ACLU of Washington announced it’s representing Cheryl Enstad, the mother of a transgender son and social worker employed by PeaceHealth St. Joseph Medical Center. The Center refused to pay for Enstad’s son’s transition-related services, which the ACLU argues violates the nondiscrimination provision of the Affordable Care Act. More individualized, NBC News reported in October that seven students at a New Jersey high school were suspended following the assault of a 14-year-old transgender student. Kylie Perez was attacked by another student in a hallway at East Side High School in Newark. School officials said the student who beat Perez, and those who recorded it, were suspended pending disciplinary hearings. In September, a South Glens Falls, New York bus driver asked students to sit on separate sides of the bus based on their gender, then kicked two transgender students off when they sat on the side aligned with their gender identity. It was at that point that 15-year-old Lilly Wolfe, a close friend of the transgender students, stood up and told the bus driver that he was discriminating against students based on their sexuality and gender identity, according to the Times Union. “I’m not moving the bus until I get what I want,” the driver is heard saying on a student’s recorded video.
GENDEREVOLUTION The UPC Genderevolution Conference will be held November 11, and presents keynote speakers Logan and Laila Ireland, a married trans couple who Ellen DeGeneres recently had on her talk show. QSaltLake asked Laila what
the term genderevolution means to her and her husband, and their focus for the conference: What does Genderevolution mean to you, and what do you hope transitioning youth and adults will take from this experiece? Genderevolution to us means being proud, standing up and speaking out to advocate and celebrate living authentically and freely. This year’s theme, “Rise Up,” embodies just that. Through our advocacy work surrounding the military and its policies and the government’s current state on issues regarding the LGBTQ+ community, we have become more motivated than ever to really encourage people around us to be just as motivated and driven to rise up and speak out for equality. This type of attitude and mindset transcends the mission for equality, it impacts our lives everyday in everything we do, the people we meet, and the places we go. This is why, being able to share our experiences and our stories are vitally important to the survival and success of our future. Because through our advocacy work, we have learned as individuals and as a couple, it is — if we have any power as a people, it is the power of being able to tell our own stories. We have learned that working hard and working together is the absolute key to success in this movement going forward. We have learned as individuals and as a couple that if we have any power as a people, it is the power of being able to tell our own stories. We have learned that working hard and working together is the absolute key to success in this movement going forward. Some of our focus and talking points in our key-
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note will include: honoring LGBTQ+ Advocacy History, what being a transgender military couple means, navigating living an authentic life November 11, 8:30–5:30 through adversiSalt Lake Community College South Campus ty in the military, empowering Registration is $25, however, no one and motivating will be turned away. Scholarship link at: the youth in getting together genderevolution.org/register/scholarships/ to carve our safe Daycare is available and free. spaces in places
Genderevolution Conference
where they feel The purpose of the Genderevolution is to: aren’t accessible, • Foster community building among trans family life, and the work we are folk and allies alike, to help create a currently doing strong and safe space to push gender moving forboundaries in the Salt Lake City area. ward.” The day-long • Educate employees, cisgender/non-trans conference, folk, trans folk, health and mental care Nov. 11, will providers, and allies about the myths and include breakout sessions, realities of gender. including voice • Celebrate trans identities in an inclusive, recognition, selfhealthy and positive way. health advocacy, “Make-up 101,” For questions or inquiries, email “Building Comgenderevolution@utahpridecenter.org passion,” “Identity through Fashion,” safe schools and many more. Q Visit utahpridecenter.org for additional information.
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Unlikely Advocate
themselves with people who do better. That’s where Transparent continues to excel: It humanizes trans experience through personal narrative. So, if you’ve never met someone who is transgender, well, you’ve met Maura, you’ve met Davina. Yeah, I think that’s right. We have to be really mindful that the character, Maura, is trans, but the actor who plays Maura, Jeffrey Tambor, is not. So, the important thing is to make sure the direction is specific when we’re talking about the trans experience. You really look at Davina. You really look at other people on the show. [Trans comedian] Ian Harvie was on for a season. Really look at the people who are actually trans, because we come from a whole other experience. Not a better experience or a deeper experience, but a specific experience, and Jeffrey will be the first to tell you that. So, I think it’s important that we’re mindful.
Actress Alexandra Billings talks Trumpera ‘Transparent’, her many real-life connections to Davina and surviving the ’80s BY CHRIS AZZOPARDI
“I’m shocked
that I’m sitting here talking to you, to be honest,” Alexandra Billings reveals, blown away by the fact that she survived the ’80s when many of her AIDS-stricken friends did not. Around that time, the actress was living and working in Chicago as Shante, her stage name while performing at a local club called The Baton. In the ’90s, she would memorably star in a number of theater productions, including campy fare such as Vampire Lesbians of Sodom and Cannibal Cheerleaders on Crack, before shifting to dramatic roles such as Mama Rose in Gypsy. Now we marvel at her as Davina Rejennae in Amazon’s Emmy-winning series Transparent. The role is esteemed not only for her genuine, real-life-influenced portrayal of the trans, HIV-positive character, a guide to her friend Maura (Jeffrey Tambor), but in the significant way Billings and Davina have become torchbearers for the trans community. Take, for instance, the episode “Groin Anomaly” from the show’s recently released fourth season, where Billings’ pre-op body is seen au naturel, the first time a trans performer has gone full frontal on TV. With rich insight and heartfelt gratitude, Billings, 55, spoke about Transparent and how the show has afforded her a fortuitous, life-changing platform to be a voice for the trans community.
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Given the resistance to the trans community from political powers, is there a new sense of urgency and importance with Transparent? I think that there has always been a sense of urgency and need in the trans community — that’s been true for generations. The portal that the Trump administration has opened up is actually a great gift because it’s afforded us a much louder voice. I think it’s doing the opposite of probably what their intention is, but thank god that that’s true. I always find the angriest, loudest voices in the room usually tend to come from a place of misdirection. That’s not to say that advocacy needs to be quiet and kind — it doesn’t — but as long as it’s in service of the movement and not in service to self, then the loud voices should take up more space. And so, these voices that are coming out of the administration are angry and misguided and misinformed. Misguided, misdirection – those are all very politically correct ways of addressing their ignorance. I appreciate that outlook. What do you say to these misguided people? It’s less about what you say and more about what you do. I think the great thing you can do for those people is to have more trans friends and bring them over to their houses for dinner, for lunch, or bring them places that are queer-friendly and are self-created safe spaces for trans people. I think that would help. Usually humans behave better when they surround
How does this season reflect what it means to be trans in Trump’s America? [Transparent creator] Jill [Soloway] has spoken about that. It’s a great question. What Jill says, and I think it’s really smart, is that she doesn’t want to get really specific at this time because this political pendulum swings so rapidly, and if we get time specific and event specific, by the time it airs it may not be true and she wants it to be inclusive. So, I think that’s smart. When I interviewed Judith Light in 2015 regarding Transparent, she told me, “My service and my work have all come together in one place, so it makes me feel fantastic.” As a fellow actress and LGBT activist, can you relate to that? I think she hit the nail on the head. Transparent is, for me, an open door, and what it’s done is given me a megaphone, so now, what I believe to be true is heard globally. It has great reverberation, and with that comes a great, honorable way of being in service in a way that I never dreamt would be possible. It has afforded me a real clarity and a real need to be clear in what I believe to be true, and ignited something in me as well. It’s all come to fruition. Can you tell me about the time in your life when you didn’t see that in your future? I transitioned in 1980 when it was illegal and unheard of, so I spent many years — as most trans people do — in a deep, deep shame. Also, for me, [there was]
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resentment, which caused a deep-rooted anger that has taken me a very long time, and continues on a daily basis, to look at. Remember, too, this was in the ’80s when the plague had hit, so my friends began contracting HIV and dying, so I was dealing with an enormous amount of loss while I was transitioning too. Just really looking back on it, I’m shocked that I’m sitting here talking to you, to be honest. It’s just too good to be true. Is this a better time to be trans than it was in 1980? I don’t know that it’s a better time — I think that it’s a different time. I think as human beings, as the human race, we expand and move forward. We always have people trying to put on the brakes, but it’s never really stopped us. It’s why we have phones that you can hold in your hand and just talk into, and it starts to work. I mean, that’s extraordinary. Now, I don’t know if that’s better, but it certainly is different. So, I don’t know if it’s better to be trans now; it certainly is at least honored in a way that wasn’t true when I was transitioning. Transparent exemplifies the very importance of casting people who do relate to the experiences of its characters. Oh my god, it’s extraordinary. I’ve never ever been around this many of my tribe before on any set ever. Have you ever felt the need to speak up about a storyline that didn’t feel particularly right or representative of the community, or do the writers always get it right? They always get it right. I know that sounds like I’m blowing smoke up someone’s ass, but Our Lady Jay is a writer and she’s trans and she’s in the room, so we have a trans writer in the room who
speaks from her own experience too. I’ve never looked at a script and said, “I’m not gonna say that,” or, “I’m not gonna do that.” It’s not that kind of show. Have you experienced that previously? Oh god, yes. I was on a show and I don’t remember what it was now. But it was a big monologue and I did it, and the director came up to me and said, “That was great, Alex. Just great. Now, could you do it again? But this time if you could do it a little bit more drag queen-y.” What are some trans tropes played by non-trans actors that you would like to see abandoned? I’d like to see any kind of label or container thrown away, or any part of the gender binary spectrum, and I mean calling people “he,” “she,” “they,” “it,” “their.” Pronouns that people prefer to use — use those pronouns. Also, the trans experience comes in all different shapes and sizes and races and beliefs, and by beliefs, I mean spiritual beliefs. And we need to start addressing that what we are is not learned behavior. It’s not fashion and it’s not commentary. It is biological, it is genetic, and it reverberates throughout history — let’s start talking about that. As an actress, what in particular did you enjoy about digging into Davina’s backstory this season? There’s a really beautiful scene that [trans Transparent actress] Trace Lysette has with young Davina, who is identifying as male at the time, and they’re in a dressing room backstage at a pageant and it could’ve come directly from a memory chip of mine. I mean, that’s how freakish it was. The way it was written and Trace’s beautiful portrayal is really just extraordinary, and it’s a view into our world
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that not a lot of cis people get to see. That really brought me back to a state of grace and gratefulness. Is your own personal story a source of inspiration for Davina? Oh, 100 percent. Actually, speaking of Trace, she is the one who has said to me before the season started, “Hey, we should go in and talk to the writers about our lives and our journeys and our characters,” and I was like, “Really? We should? OK.” So we did. And I just wrote down facts of my life and they took all of it and put it in the show. It speaks volumes to the kind of people that we’re working with. I mean, what other show says to you, “Hey, tell us about your life and give us the gift of you and we’re gonna use that in order to represent human beings on the planet”? Beyoncé is being lauded for having Laverne Cox model her new Ivy Park fashion line. Oh, yes, I did hear about that! What does something like Beyoncé taking the trans community under her wings mean for the T community? Well, back in the day you had people like Liza Minnelli and Barbra Streisand, so a lot of gay and queer icons have been doing this for generations, so the fact that Beyoncé is doing it is fantastic, but she’s hardly the first. The difference is that this generation — this younger generation — has been the mother of invention, so the only real difference in being queer nowadays is that you can post it all over the freakin’ world, whereas in my day you had to write letters, for god’s sake. So it’s a larger megaphone, that’s what’s going on. You know, the great thing about Beyoncé is she’s a woman of color, so that’s huge. And she’s a mega super-
star, who also comes from a marginalized background, so that’s what’s worth noting. There’s been a lot of debate about non-trans actors playing trans roles. All actors should tell all kinds of stories. I think in order to authenticate a story you need to have someone who is rooted in the historical experience of the storytelling, otherwise it can fly into fabrication. If you’re going to have an African-American story, you need to have African-American people in it; if you’re going to have a trans story, you need to have trans people in it. Felicity Huffman ended up with the role you were originally supposed to play in 2005’s Transamerica because the studio wanted a more commercial lead. Do you think a major studio would be open to casting a trans woman in a lead trans role now? That’s a good question. I really don’t know. You’d probably have to ask the Hollywood people. I know that I have been in conversations with a director, and we’re supposed to be filming a movie next summer that is trans-centric and has me in the lead role, but all kinds of things can happen till then. I just had a movie come out called Valley of Bones in which I played a non-trans role, and I’m filming Goliath too. I really am just sort of shocked and eternally grateful, and certainly the tide is turning. But when we have conversations about, “Do you think it’s possible that at least one time in movie history a trans person can play a lead role?” then we’ve got a long way to go. Q As editor of Q Syndicate, Chris Azzopardi has interviewed a multitude of superstars, including Meryl Streep, Mariah Carey and Beyoncé. Reach him via his website at chris-azzopardi.com and on Twitter (@ chrisazzopardi).
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BEST RESTAURANT FOR BREAKFAST
Park Cafe
Located on the south side of Liberty Park, The Park Cafe offers great views of shirtless joggers in the summer months. But even better is the breakfast menu at this quaint and buzzing bistro. The blueberry pancakes, biscuits and gravy, and the corned beef hash are all the rave. RUNNERS UP: PENNY ANN’S, MARKET STREET
BEST VEGETARIAN/VEGAN RESTAURANT
Zest
Our annual readers’ choice awards are here. Thousands of votes were cast for the most fabulous local Utah restaurants, bars, services, people and events. 120 categories in all. Let us begin:
MOST FABULOUS RESTAURANTS BEST INEXPENSIVE RESTAURANT
The Other Place
Big plates of well prepared food, a warm and inviting staff, ample parking and good prices make The Other Place a Fabby. It’s a fixture on Broadway and almost Fifth East. On most Thursday
nights you can find high strung tenors, baritones and basses slathering their vocal chords after SL Men’s Choir Riot and Rehearsal. Breakfast, lunch and dinner, seven days a week. RUNNERS UP: BUD’S, TAQUERIA 27
BEST AFTER-HOURS RESTAURANT
Off Trax
“When you’ve had two beers or mixed drinks per hour on a weekend night, who wants to
do more than walk 10 feet for bit of food, after the bar? That’s one reason, Off Trax is a Fabby. Right next door to Try-Angles on Central Harvey Milk Boulevard serving Breakfast, Burgers, Salads and more with cheery service and atmosphere. After hours, lunch and dinner and a Sunday brunch. RUNNERS UP: DEE’S, PIE HOLE
An open-aired, stylish Vegan restaurant and handcrafted cocktail bar has all the elements of a Fabby winner. Gluten free, organic greens, avocado toast and chocolate smoothie with a splash of bourbon, anyone’s heart would be a-flutter. RUNNERS UP: VERTICAL DINER, SAGES
BEST CONTEMPORARY RESTAURANT
Copper Onion
The Copper Onion offers locally sourced American fare at a decent price, as well as a comfortable and inviting atmosphere located in the heart of downtown SLC. RUNNERS UP: AVENUES PROPER, CURRENT
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BEST PARK CITY RESTAURANT
RUNNERS UP: PIG & A JELLY JAR, NO FRILLS DINER
High West Distillery
BEST ASIAN RESTAURANT
RUNNERS UP: FLETCHER’S, RIVER HORSE ON MAIN
This Japanese staple of the city continually rates one of the highest by QSaltLake readers. They apparently love the location, the great service, of course the fabulous rolls, but most importantly the decor. Duh!
While appropriately garnered with the prestigious Fabby for Most Fabulous Park City Restaurant, High West thankfully has two additional locations in SLC — one being at the airport. We should all air travel more often.
Roosters
Takashi
RUNNERS UP: ASIAN STAR, SAPA
BEST OGDEN RESTAURANT
BEST MEXICAN RESTAURANT
No surprise Roosters is a Fabby. After all, its original location is in a 119 year old building with exposed brick, cool lighting and with good food, beer and wine. The clientele is diverse as you would expect on Ogden’s Historic 25th Street, just a Ride UTA Frontrunner trip to the foot of 25th Street. Use your GPS to drive to the Layton location, near the Davis County Convention Center.
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Red Iguana
Who is going to stand in line for a Mexican Restaurant? Hundreds of people--tourists, locals, foodies; all ages, sexes, genders, orientations and political stripes-every day wait for lunch or dinner at the two Red Iguana locations (which just happen to anchor the reviving NoTe neighborhood, RUNNERS UP: CHILE TEPIN, EL CHIHUAHUA
Next to Club Try-Angles, Half Block from TRAX
Home of the Happy Hangover Coffee, burgers, sandwiches, soups, salads, appetizers, breakfast Pool table, big-screen tv HOURS: Mon–Thur 8am–6pm Friday 7am–3pm Open at 1am Friday and Saturday Nights after bar hours Sunday Brunch 11am–2pm 259 W 900 S 801-364-4307 OFFTRAXSLC.COM
Absolutely Fabulous!
LUNCH DINNER COCKTAILS
18 WEST MARKET ST 801-519-9595
VOTED BEST SUSHI BY QSALTLAKE READERS IN THE 2008–2016 FABBY AWARDS
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chicken, some well prepared type of potato, and fresh vegetables. Original restaurant is in SLC on 700 East. There’s a Log Cabin on Riverdale Road in Ogden and on Provo’s University Avenue. Now in Reno too. Beer and wine in SLC and Ogden, our guess is Provo is Dry and Reno is wet. RUNNERS UP: KITTY PAPPAS, TIMBERMINE
BEST WINE SELECTION
By The Glass
Lucky 13 once again wins for best burgers
BEST GREEK/MEDITERRANEAN RESTAURANT
Mazza
Anchoring two Gayborhoods, East Harvey Milk District at 9th and 9th and the charming 15th and 15th neighborhood Each restaurant has a distinct design style--traditional wood paneled and table cloth at 912 E 900 South and a Mediterranean Cafe Style at 1515 S 1500 East. Both have the same ambitious and scrumptious menu. RUNNERS UP: THE OTHER PLACE, CAFE MED
BEST ITALIAN RESTAURANT
Canella’s
Mama Mia, the meatballs!! Cannellas Southern Italian cuisine is scrumptious and a patio so the homos can gawk at passersby. That’s what Fabbys are for ... to boast the elite, fabulous and the free entertainment. RUNNERS UP: PER NOI TRATTORIA, STANZA
BEST STEAKHOUSE
Ruby River
Where’s the beef (or big plate or bbq chicken)? Find it at Ruby River. It’s a simple and time tested menu--beef, seafood or
By The Glass Wine Bar serves over 75 bottles of wine by the glass. Wow! Though probably not to just one person, right? If that were the case, Michael Aaron would be on a stool at least four days a week. However, BTG has to be, and remains, stellar to keep winning over Michael’s House for the Most Fabulous Wine Selection. RUNNERS UP: MARKET STREET, MICHAEL AARON’S HOUSE
BEST BEER SELECTION
Beer Bar
Buddied up to Bar X, the iconic named Beer Bar obviously takes home this Fabby award. That’s just too much beer and shenanigans on one block. See you all there! RUNNERS UP: BAYOU, BEER HIVE
BEST BURGER JOINT
Lucky 13
Big juicy burgers, savory salads, a brunch menu, beer all make for a fabulous night at the Bees ballgame for the cheapskate. Chilling on the patio, listening
CELEBRATE THE HOLIDAYS WITH MAZZA. DINE IN OR LET US CATER FOR YOU. Serving in two Gayborhoods: East Harvey Milk District, 912 East Harvey Milk Blvd – 801-521-4572 1515 South 15th East – 801-484-9259 MAZZACAFE.COM
*Beer and wine only at 15TH & 15TH en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_multinational_festivals_and_holidays
to the roar of the crowds, all the while snickering because you’ve got the best seat in house. Damn your lucky! RUNNERS UP: PROPER BURGER, CROWN BURGER
BEST SANDWICHES
Even Stevens
Even Stevens not only takes the Fabby for its scrumptious sandwiches, such as the Sprang Chicken and the Do Gouda, but also for all the gouda they do giving back to the communities of SLC. When the first shop opened in 2014 it donated 30,000 sandwiches to nonprofits, and it continues to do so. Fabulous! RUNNERS UP: BUDS, OFF TRAX
BEST PIZZA
The Pie Pizzeria
Well, The Pie takes home yet another Fabby award for its outstanding pizzas swimming in cheese. It’s comfort food at its finest and a crowd pleaser to college students and the young at heart. RUNNERS UP: PIE HOLE, ESTE
BEST BAKERY/PASTRIES
Gourmandise
if you appreciate pastries, you’ll definitely appreciate Gourmandise, whose very name means “indulging in good eating.” The mouth-watering sweet and savory creations are as much fun to look at as they are to eat. Don’t drool on the glass. RUNNERS UP: LES MADELEINES, TUILE BAKERY
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UTAH’S BEST BURGER Winner
2013 Fabby Awards
“Best Burger Joint”
Winner
2014 Fabby Awards
“Best Burger Joint”
Winner
2015 Fabby Awards
“Best Burger Joint”
Winner
2016 Fabby Awards
“Best Burger Joint”
Winner
2017 Fabby Awards
“Best Burger Joint”
LUCKY13SLC.COM
135 W. 1300 S. | 801.487.4418
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RUNNERS UP: PAT’S BBQ, SUGARHOUSE BBQ
BEST SEAFOOD
Current
Current Fish & Oyster shells out the most fabulous seafood dishes according to our readers. It must be because of the Seafood Tower plate: 18 oysters, 8 shrimp, 12 mussels and a 12-oz Maine lobster tail. Where’s my mallet? RUNNERS UP: MARKET STREET, OYSTER BAR
Coffee Garden has been a staple in our community for decades.
BEST LOCAL COFFEEHOUSE
The Coffee Garden
It’s national coming out day everyday at the Coffee Garden. With a cup of CG coffee in you, you can face anything. Two locations: 9th and 9th you can dress like a student and glower at the Republicans getting QSaltLake magazines, Downtown, 245 S Main ,you get to stand next to the Masters of the Universe from Goldman
Sachs or the ever exciting Dan Rascone from KUTV. RUNNERS UP: SUGARHOUSE COFFEE, PUBLIK
BEST BARBECUE
R&R Barbecue
R&R Barbecue is a funky counter-serve shack dishing BBQ meats by the plate or pound — duh! always by the pound! — plus burgers, sides & beers. Appears that QSaltLake readers find it finger-to-lip-licking good. No surprise there.
BEST SALADS
Cafe Zupas
Offering house-made “zupa” salads like the Mangoberry and the Kale & Quinoa in part deservedly gives Cafe Zupas the Most Fabulous Salad award. But don’t forget to check out the seasonal signature salad, which currently is the Autumn Harvest Protein Bowl — it’s a mouthful that’ll make your tongue tingle. RUNNERS UP: ZEST RESTAURANT, MARKET STREET
BEST SOUPS
Soup Kitchen
The Soup Kitchen is a comfort palace of Sugar House and other locations. A truck diner setting without the waitress, the kitchen buzzes with excitement and a variety of steaming soups that will warm your heart and take you back to your childhood home. RUNNERS UP: CAFE ZUPAS, ZEST
BEST BRUNCH
Ruth’s Diner
Located in Emigration Canyon, Ruth’s Diner has been drawing in the masses for years. It typically requires wait time for a table, particularly for brunch, but it’s well worth the wait. It’s likely been a constant Fabby winner/nominee because of the fabulous patio and tasty mimosas, just sayin! RUNNERS UP: AVENUES PROPER, MARKET STREET
BEST BREW PUB
Squatters
Squatters returns as a Fabby award winner for its unique selection of local brews. A staple for the arts community, particularly following an afternoon or evening of live theater the restaurant is a-buzz with excitement and good times. RUNNERS UP: RED ROCK BREWING, WASATCH
BEST NEW RESTAURANT
Lake Effect
Craft drinks and Spanishinspired fare are served in Lake Effect’s intimate setting with live music. This new addition “brings a “big-city fell” to the SL nightlife. The most fabulous is that weekdays are themed, including Tasting Tuesdays and Wine Wednesdays. RUNNERS UP: LAZIZ, PURGATORY
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Club Try-Angles takes top spots in many categories this year, according to QSaltLake readers
BEST FOOD TRUCK
BEST IRISH PUB
BEST LOUNGE
This inaugural Fabby category goes to Waffle Love — self explanatory street fare that Q readers are all syrupy over. You’ll just need to check the schedule on their website to find out when and where the trucks will be to get your waffle fix.
Live music, trivia night, karaoke, $1 mimosas brunch and kilts, as traditionally worn make Piper Down a true Fabby award winner. Plus, it’s the most fabulous place to find lesbians, woohoo!
We here at QSaltLake congratulate Red Door on this award but we believe it all has to do with the signature martinis because after only one, things getting super blurry.
Waffle Love
Piper Down
The Red Door
RUNNERS UP: MACCOOL’S, MURPHY’S
RUNNERS UP: LAKE EFFECT, BOURBON HOUSE
RUNNERS UP: CUP BOP, FRESHIE’S LOBSTER
BEST NIGHTCLUB
BEST BAR FOR THE BUCK
MOST FABULOUS BARS
Salt Lake nightlife is better with Jam. Getting hot and sticky while bumping and grinding with half-dressed dudes is a staple of this Marmalade hotspot.
Not sure if this is a well-deserved award for Try-Angles — have you ever seen the drag shows? While impressive, the gals will literally tackle you for a dollar bill. Just saying it with love.
BEST ALL-GAY ALL-DAY EVERY DAY BAR
Club Try-Angles
All-gay, all-day, every day certainly describes Club TryAngles ... sometimes too gay, ha! Though not opening until 6pm on Saturdays is cruel and unusual. From pool to darts to drag shows, fundraising events and summer BBQs, Try-Angles always makes you feel at home and be your true gay self. RUNNERS UP: SUN TRAPP, JAM
BEST BAR TO FIND LESBIANS
Piper Down
It’s only obvious, right? It’s on State Street. Okay, that’s a stretch but kudos to Piper Down for being an open-minded, welcoming addition to SLC’s LGBT community. RUNNERS UP: AREA 51, BOURBON HOUSE
Club Jam
RUNNERS UP: CLUB TRY-ANGLES, CLUB X
BEST DIVE BAR
Twilite
Twilite Lounge garners this coveted Fabby award for its nofrills and retro vibes. Seriously, it still has arcade games. RUNNERS UP: CHEERS TO YOU, DUFFY’S
BEST SPORTS BAR
Bout Time
Located at the Gateway, ‘Bout Time is named the Most Fabulous Sports Bar. Since this is typically a close-race category, we’d like to congratulate runners-up The Huddle and Fiddler’s Elbow. All other sports bars should take a knee. What!?!! RUNNERS UP: THE HUDDLE, FIDDLER’S ELBOW
Club Try-Angles
RUNNERS UP: X-WIVES PLACE, CHEERS TO YOU
BEST COLLEGE BAR
Big Ed’s (RIP)
RUNNERS UP: THE WINE BAR, OYSTER BAR
BEST BEER BAR
Beer Bar
This win is a no-brainer, it’s all in the name. RUNNERS UP: BEERHIVE, BAYOU
BEST COCKTAILS
Under Current
Under Current is a new upscale, casual neighborhood bar headlining an original .and exciting addition to the downtown cocktail scene. Q readers say it’s so. Congrats to Under Current on its first Fabby Award. RUNNERS UP: PURGATORY, WATER WITCH
BEST BAR FOR AN AFTERNOON CROWD
Sun Trapp
Q readers have honored Big Ed’s, rightly so, as the Most Fabulous Bar College Bar. Sadly, this staple for UofU students closed its doors last September after nearly 40 years of making students wish they had studied harder. We’ll miss you, Big Ed’s.
A gay bar is known for it’s huge ... deck. In the summer, it’s a great place to hang out with friends and drink beer in the sun. The rest of the time, it’s inside for pool and darts.
BEST BAR FOR WINE
Club Try-Angles
RUNNERS UP: GREEN PIG, GRACIE’S
By The Glass
A wine bar, yes you can get other things to drink, but a sommelier selected wine list makes for good sipping. Nice chairs and upholstered booths facilitates making out after a couple postBallet glasses of wine.
RUNNERS UP: BAR X,CLUB TRY-ANGLES
BEST BAR THAT GIVES BACK TO THE COMMUNITY Try-Angles is certainly community driven: hosting fundraisers typically monthly and seasonally is a forte. Q readers say thank you for giving back so humbly and for the new paper towel dispensers. Mwah! RUNNERS UP: SUN TRAPP, SQUATTERS
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BEST THEATER COMPANY
BEST LOCAL VISUAL ARTIST
This is a turn of events for this category and it’s well-deserved. Congratulations to the Divas on winning this coveted award. May the Diva force be with you for years to come.
Cat’s art forms consistently expresses themes of feminine empowerment, confidence, hope and beauty. She has won several awards and her work has been highlighted in dozens of publications.
Viva La Diva Show
RUNNERS UP: SALT LAKE ACTING CO, PLAN-B THEATRE CO, PIONEER THEATRE CO
BEST ART GALLERY/ART MUSEUM
Utah Museum of Fine Arts The Viva La Diva show has taken Salt Lake by storm.
BEST FRIDAY NIGHT
Club Try-Angles
What more can we say? If you’ve never been to Angles or haven’t been in a while, check it out on your next free Friday. It’s highly likely you’ll make new friends and or lovers. RUNNERS UP: SUN TRAPP, CLUB JAM
BEST SATURDAY NIGHT
Viva La Diva Show
Who doesn’t love spending a Saturday night with the best divas in the world. Cher, Madonna, Katy, Dolly, Bette and so many more. Sure, these are impersonators but Q readers say they’re the bombshells, so it must be true. RUNNERS UP: SUN TRAPP, CLUB TRY-ANGLES
BEST MONTHLY BAR EVENT
Underwear Night at Club Try-Angles
Yikes! Another win for TryAngles. Will no doubt the infamous Underwear Night secures another Fabby award. Seriously you had her at “underwear!” RUNNERS UP: BLACKBOOTS AT CLUB TRY-ANGLES CHOW DOWN AT SUN TRAPP
BEST BAR FOR KARAOKE
Tavernacle
If you like to sing, or like to listen to others sing, or like to drink to make others’ singing tolerable, head to Tavernacle on Sunday or Tuesday night.
PHOTO: STEVE CONLIN
RUNNERS UP: PIPER DOWN, LONESTAR SALOON
BEST PARK CITY BAR
No Name Saloon
It may have no name, but it does have a lot of faces. It’s a hodge podge of backgrounds, styles and interests but what makes it fabulous is no names are needed because when you’re there you’re all one! RUNNERS UP: WASATCH BREW PUB, EATING ESTABLISHMENT
BEST OGDEN BAR
Funk N Dive
Ogden’s only 5-star dive bar was originally built as a Prohibition speakeasy by Ogden’s own Mayor Ora Bundy in the basement of the Ogden Courthouse. Fabulous! RUNNERS UP: ALLEGED, ROOSTERS
MOST FABULOUS ARTS BEST DANCE COMPANY
Ballet West
Nationally renowned talent and staging for well-proportioned, nearly nude female and male dancers. They do daring and traditional ballet and are very famous for cracking nuts. Always Fabby. RUNNERS UP: REPERTORY DANCE THEATRE, RIRIE WOODBURY
A whole new look this year at the UofU. Presentation and a great new gallery for Women and other under-served communities’ art. A gift store for uniqueness and a fabulous local artist Holiday Sale. Most un-Utah-like they are open Sundays. Take a tour a with a very knowledgeable docent.
RUNNERS UP: THE LEONARDO, UTAH MUSEUM OF CONTEMPORARY ART
BEST LOCAL MUSICIAN/BAND
(TIE) Bronwen Beecher and Michelle Moonshine
This may be the first time the Fabby award is honored in a tie decision in this category. Beecher’s violin playing, powerful lyrics and soulful voice have captivated audiences across the West for years. She is also a popular local performer, appearing regularly at the Utah Pride Festival and several locations across the state. Michelle is reminiscent of a young Emmy Lou Harris with a delicate timbre. Q readers love her. GINGER & THE GENTS TIE: PIXIE & THE PARTYGRASS BOYS, HOT HOUSE WEST
BEST MUSIC VENUE
The State Room
Headlining huge Utah fan-based artists and selling out most shows makes The State room the obvious choice for a Fabby award. RUNNERS UP: URBAN LOUNGE, RED BUTTE GARDEN
Cat Palmer
RUNNERS UP: GERI CORDOVA, ROSIE MITCHELL, TRENT CALL
BEST ACTOR
Jason CoZmo
The brainchild behind the ultra popular Viva La Diva Show, CoZmo appears to be climbing the ranks to taking of Utah’s theatre world. Bam! RUNNERS UP: ALEXIS BAIGUE, ROBERT SCOTT SMITH
BEST PARK CITY ARTS
Egyptian Theatre
Since at least 1898 Park City has turned to the Egyptian for live theater, lectures and concerts. It has endured fire, snowfall, extended vacancy and financial shortfall to arrive as our Fabby, again this year. RUNNERS UP: PARK CITY INSTITUTE, KIMBALL ARTS GALLERY
BEST OGDEN ARTS
Good Company Theatre Summer productions at the Ogden Amphitheater on Historic 25th and in their winter home at 2402 Wall Ave. Good Company Theatre develops and promotes high-quality, eclectic theatrical productions and events. Founded in 2012, it’s a Fabby addition to Utah’s theatre scene. RUNNERS UP: BELLA MUSE GALLERY, ECCLES COMMUNITY ART CENTER
BEST LOCAL THEATRE PRODUCTION OF 2016–2017
Viva La Diva Show
Now what more can be said? SLC is quickly becoming the new Las Vegas of cabaret shows. It’s all about the frocks, wigs and brassieres. RUNNERS UP: SATURDAY’S VOYEUR, THE WILL ROGERS FOLLIES
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BEST MUSIC EVENT OF 2016–2017
Givestock
Two meals were donated for every ticket bought to this huge music and arts festival at Fort Buenaventura Park in Ogden. Presented by Even Stevens and sponsored by Friar Tuck’s Barbershop and Salt Lake Barber Company. Don’t miss it next year.
GAY WRITES
Everything from Angels to Zen
RUNNERS UP: LOVELOUD, WOMENS REDROCK MUSIC FESTIVAL, CRUCIAL FEST, TWILIGHT CONCERT SERIES
MOST FABULOUS SHOPPING BEST LOCAL SHOP FOR CLOTHING
iconoCLAD
For a wide, great selection of apparel, Q readers highly recommend iconoCLAD. RUNNERS UP: SPARK, HIP & HUMBLE
BEST CONSIGNMENT/GENTLY USED CLOTHING
iconoCLAD
For gently used clothes that still make you look like a runway model, iconCLAD is the place. RUNNERS UP: PIB’S EXCHANGE
BEST PLACE TO CLOTHES SHOP ON A BUDGET
iconoCLAD
If your clothes budget is waning so much that you can only afford one sock, then iconoCLAD will be your savior. RUNNERS UP: DECADES
BEST PLACE TO CLOTHES SHOP TO BREAK THE BUDGET
Bastille
Budget be damned! Since 1997 Bastille has been presenting their interpretation of current, relevant and inspiring fashion, not skewed by price, geography, politics or marketing. They see fashion as an ever-changing art and hope to continue to evolve with the fashion that surrounds us. RUNNERS UP: SPARK, APT. 202
BEST JEWELER
Ari Diamonds
Girls and gay boys’ gayest best friends are all about diamonds ... and pearls! Here’s to Ari Diamonds in Layton for making them tooth worthy. RUNNERS UP: PIXEL & TORCH, 9TH & 9TH JEWELERS
12896 S Pony Express Rd Suite 200 in Draper (just north of IKEA) 801.333.3777 www.ilovelotus.com
LotusStore
A DiverseCity Series writing group A program of Salt Lake Community College’s Community Writing Ctr. The group meets the 2nd and 4th Monday of each month, 6:30-8 pm, Salt Lake City Library Square, 210 E. 400 South, Ste. 8, Salt Lake.
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BEST ANTIQUES
TIE: Now & Again and Capital City Antiques
Michael Sanders’ Now & Again doesn’t claim to traffick in antiques, but brings you very nice mid-century modern stuff and an occasional flirting, leer from the owner. Capital City Antique mall on West Temple give you a selection of antiques from very old to “new” classic looks. RUNNERS UP: CHIC & UNIQUE, RETRO ROSE
BEST FLORIST
TIE: LUX Floral & Design, Native Flowers Spark, better known by some in the community as Cocker’s, has been around for decades
BEST UNDERWEAR
BEST PLACE TO BUY DRAG ATTIRE
There’s always something up lifting about wearing sexy underwear from Spark. All the name brands you know and love or at least, “as seen on Grindr”. There’s more to Spark than the famous underwear collection, shirts, pants, jackets, other apparel with a Tra Tra La La sensibility. At Trolley, facing Seventh East.
Vintage, modern, gothic, trendy, glittery, weird or wild, this Sugar House used clothing store has a fabulous drag outfit waiting for you. And the fun part is, you can ask one of the clerk’s to help you try it on ... we think.
Spark/Cockers
RUNNER UP: MISCHIEVOUS
BEST SHOES
Spark
Many thanks to Spark for making our feet sweet and sexy. Shoes make the man and woman, but cross-dressing makes it even better. RUNNERS UP: ICONOCLAD
Pib’s Exchange
RUNNERS UP: DECADES
BEST PLACE TO BUY HALLOWEEN OR OTHER COSTUMES
Pib’s Exchange
Whether you’re into spandex, capes, warts, warlocks, golden lassos or anything sheer, Pib’s has the costume for you. RUNNERS UP: MASK, ZURCHERS
BEST FURNITURE
TIE: Now & Again and SF Design
What’s old is new and what new is very nice. Now & Again featuring lovingly used, midcentury modern furniture and accoutrement at a new location in Sugar House. San Francisco Design just a bit south of Sugar House on Highland Drive servers as a place for youngsters to learn about and aspire to good taste in furniture and oldsters to just buy it. RUNNERS UP: THE OLD FLAMINGO
BEST LOCAL BOOK STORE
King’s English Bookshop
And the Fabby for Most Fabulous Book Store goes to ... wait for it ... drum roll please ... oh. Its King’s English again! Well no surprise here. The quaint, wall-to-wall book-sleeved shop continues to be fabulous. It’s friendly, helpful staff and awesome monthly events for both children and adults make it Q reader’s favorite year after year. Kudos! RUNNERS UP: GOLDEN BRAID BOOKS, KEN SANDERS, WELLER BOOK WORKS
Floral design is 10% perspiration and 90% the personality of the designer. Lux gives you big, elegant, spectaculars as befitting one of the big personalities in floral and “LGBT Performance Art”. Native Flowers creates intimate reflections, sometime understated, sometimes not. A tie in the most “competitive heading,” both are Fabby. RUNNERS UP: TWIGS, THE ART FLORAL AND ESPECIALLY FOR YOU
BEST GIFT STORE
Cahoots
Cahoots has been at the game for 30 years mostly on East Harvey Milk Blvd and they never go stale. They keep up the trends and stay topical. Especially thrilling is the “sommelier” of lube and condoms. He seems to have used and has an opinion, usually right on, about the products he recommends. RUNNERS UP: CABIN FEVER, HIP & HUMBLE
BEST ADULT TOY STORE
Mischievous
Looking for a plaything that has a heartbeat and that’s fun and kinky? Well, this adult boutique can’t help you there, but it can help you get all the lube, massage oil, fetish wear, and kinky toys and games that you will ever need. RUNNERS UP: CAHOOTS, BLUE BOUTIQUE
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Kylee Howell of Friar Tucks Barbershop has taken Salt Lake by storm
MOST FABULOUS SERVICES BEST BARBERSHOP
Friar Tuck’s
It’s no surprise that Kylee Howell leads Friar Tuck to a Fabby, ‘cause Kylee is very fabby. The shop gives back to the community through service and fundraisie for VOA and other LGBT non-profits. If Fabby needs a punctuation mark, search Youtube with the words, Kylee and Dove. You’ll find a real exclamation point. RUNNERS UP: JED’S, STEFAHN’S
BEST CATERER
Lux
Kelly and John Lake founded Le Croissant Catering in their kitchen and turned it into the most LGBT supporting and fanciest caterers in SLC. They transitioned to LUX in 2017 to emphasize they are the complete package for events--planning, design, flowers as well as food. Kelly will even sing at a funeral if asked. RUNNERS UP: DONE TO YOUR TASTE, SWEET BRIGADIER
BEST HAIR STYLIST
Matthew Landis
Have you seen Matthew Landis put maramalade in Michael Aaron’s hair? It’s perfectly toasted! This is why Matthew and Landis Salons continue the Fabby reign. RUNNERS UP: SHANE CREEKMORE — UNITY SALON, JARED BRIGGS — LUNATIC FRINGE
BEST NURSERY/GARDEN CENTER
Cactus & Tropicals
What a great spot for unique plants and indoor and outdoor decor and gifts. C&T has been around since 1975 and have nurseries on Canyon Rim in SLC and in Draper. RUNNERS UP: GLOVER NURSERY, MILLCREEK GARDENS
BEST LANDSCAPE DESIGNER
Mark Morris — Moda Landscape
The Morris bushes are a friend of the LGBT community of Utah. There’s no other rose by his name. RUNNERS UP: DEAN ANESI — URBAN GARDEN CO, MOTT’S LANDSCAPING
BEST TATTOOS
Matt Miskol — Yellow Rose
Matt Miskol’s body art scores a Fabby award by Q readers. To view his artistry on the canvas of epidermis visit matthewmiskol. tumblr.com RUNNERS UP: CORY HARRIS — IRONCLAD ELECTRIC TATTOOING, TORI LOKE — ZEN TATTOO
BEST COUNSELOR
Nancy Hoole Taylor — Ascent Counseling
The purpose of therapy is to increase a client’s ability to rise above the constricting and self-limiting ways in which he/ she views him/herself and the world. Nancy Hoole Taylor is the Most Fabulous in helping those who struggle with depression, anxiety, sexual orientation, gender identity, trauma, addictions, and spirituality. HOLLIE HANCOCK — IRON MOUNTAIN COUNSELING, JON SCHEFFRES — GPS
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BEST ATTORNEY
Chris Wharton
Having won the coveted Fabby last year obviously hasn’t tainted his fabulousness when it comes to fighting for equal treatment of LGBT families under the law. RUNNERS UP: DANI HAWKES, TARA REILLY
BEST CHIROPRACTOR
The Joint The award-winning docs at Animal Care Center love your pets almost as much as you do.
BEST PET GROOMER
The Dog Show
Nestled in the 15th and 15th Gayborhood, the award winning crew of dog loving groomers make take all kinds of dogs and makes them purty. RUNNERS UP: PAW BY PAW, PAWHILL PET SPA
BEST VETERINARIAN
Animal Care Center
Because the doctors and staff at Animal Care Center love your pets almost as much as you do, our community entrusts them with their fur babies. RUNNERS UP: UNIVERSITY VET CLINIC, AVENUES PET CLINIC
BEST KENNEL/PET BOARDING
Utah Dog Park
One of the great community supporters gets a Fabby for a nice facilities and great staff.
Two locations (Woods Cross and N Temple) offer daycare and overnight kenneling with a dog wash and they offer a pet shuttle. A Two time winner “Best of State”, they are affiliated with the five time Best of State winner, Animal Care Center. RUNNERS UP: CAMP BOW WOW
BEST REAL ESTATE AGENT
TIE: Steven Germann and Dawn Houghton
Steven and Dawn tie up this category in escrow — Fabulous! RUNNERS UP: EMILY HAYES, MARY OLSEN, LESLIE FINK FOX
BEST PLACE TO GET PIERCED
KOI
Pierce my fin says Ellen but save my Dory, KOI?
BEST FINANCIAL ADVISOR
Ryan Taylor — LGBT Financial
When not learning new languages or whitewater kayaking, Ryan Taylor is fabulous at helping the LGBT community with insurance and financial services, special needs estate strategies, and more.
BEST MASSAGE
Kura Door
An elegant Japanese spa in the Avenues featuring eight different massage styles including four hand and hot stones is a shoo-in for a Fabby. TIE: BASALT, RON’S RUB MASSAGE ENVY
Spines in Sugar House’s LGBT community are much better now that The Joint opened near Barnes & Noble. Like they say: they’ve got everyone’s back. RUNNERS UP: DR. NUGGET (NGUYET NGUYEN), COREY SONDRUP
BEST PHOTOGRAPHER
Sasha Polack Taylor
Sasha has a fabulous eye for incredible photography that truly tells a beautiful story, just as beautiful as she is. RUNNERS UP: CAT PALMER, DAVID DANIELS
BEST BANK/CREDIT UNION/ FINANCIAL INSTITUTION
America First
America Fist has got your money, so rest easy!
RUNNERS UP: MOUNTAIN AMERICA CREDIT UNION, UNIVERSITY FEDERAL CREDIT UNION
RUNNERS UP: IRIS, ENSO
PET GROOMING ON 15TH & 15TH 801-466-6100
1508 SOUTH 1500 EAST HOURS: TUES – SAT
8:00AM–5:30PM
• Keep your pets happy with a special Spring or Summer cut to keep them cool as the hot weather approaches. • Ask about our Furminator® Treatments to keep your special friend comfortable and happy. • Convenient east side location from Olympus Cove to The Avenues as well as downtown Salt Lake • Experienced groomers to follow your directions for a great look, we don’t do cookie cutter cuts or styles. • 27 years at our location in the 15th & 15th neighborhood. • Ask about extended summer hours
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BEST TRAVEL AGENT/AGENCY
BEST CHURCH
Bob Guymon will tell you where to go and how to get there. In a good way. Group travel, Broadway tours and more.
Accepting LGBT members for who they are, the Unitarian Universalists have been strong supporters of equality for many years. With locations around the state, there’s a spiritual community for everyone.
Bob Guymon — Thomas Travel
RUNNERS UP: THE TRAVEL CONCIERGE
First Unitarian
RUNNERS UP: FIRST BAPTIST CHURCH, ST. LUKE’S EPISCOPAL
WHITE
SERV YOU ING F 62 YR OR S.
BLACK
STRAIGHT
29
GAY
RELIGIOUS
ATHEIST
INITIAL VISIT
INCLUDING CONSULTATION, EXAM & ADJUSTMENT
Independent and Group Travel Specialists Contact: Bob Guymon or Monica Mashall
• Cruises • River Cruises • World-Wide Tours • Tropical Vacations • Escorted Broadway Theater & Arts • Disney, Mexico, Hawaii, Caribbean
801-266-2775 1-800-255-3230 535 E 4500 S #D200, SLC www.thomastravel.com stefanie@thomastravel.com
*Offer valid for first visit only. Initial visit includes consultation, exam and adjustment. Please present offer at the time of redemption. © 2017 The Joint Corp.
www.thejoint.com
YOU
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BEST MORTGAGE BROKER
BEST INSURANCE AGENT
Christine Cardamon
Christine Cardamon with Graystone Mortgage has been helping us with mortgage and, sometimes, insurance service for along time. Listen for a delightful, smoky voice and laugh at the Utah G&L Chamber of Commerce meetings and you’ll find Christine on the other end. RUNNERS UP: JENNIFER BERARD, AARON BUTLER, JULIE BRIZEE
BEST PEST CONTROL
Agent Pest Control
Passionate, informed and engaging, Agent Pest Control takes home a Fabby. Congrats!
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RUNNERS UP: BEELINE, NATURE’S WAY PEST SOLUTIONS
Jon Jepsen — SentryWest
Jepsen is one of those guys who gives back to the community, which is probably why he is chosen each year as best insurance agent by Q readers.
RUNNER-UP: TIM SHANTO — AMERICAN FAMILY INSURANCE
BEST WEDDING PLANNER
Angela Cordova/ Diverse Diva
Bright, bubbly, fun and creative that’s Angela Cordova aka Diverse Diva. She will put together a Fabby wedding to be remembered as the best party most people will go to in their whole life. RUNNERS UP: LUX CATERING & EVENTS, MICHELLE LEO
BEST WEDDING DJ
DJ Pauly
DJ Pauly to Q: “We work with clients to provide an atmosphere that’s fun, elegant and comfortable for everyone, regardless of sexual orientation. We don’t tell cheesy jokes or make people wear silly hats and do the YMCA. Our motto is One Day, One Party, One Dream-Come-True.” Deserving of a Fabby! RUNNERS UP: ROB FERRE, KEVAN FLOYD
Rev. Christopher Scuderi performing his 1000th wedding.
BEST WEDDING OFFICIANT
Rev. Christopher Scuderi, Universal Heart Ministry
The Rev C S has performed a record 1000 marriage and commitment ceremonies. Not just weddings, Christopher does services covering every major life event or rite of passage. RUNNERS UP: DAVID PACE, MICHAEL AARON
BEST RADIO STATION
KRCL 801-308-2050
www.jonjepsen.com
KRCL pioneered and remains one of the great voices for the LGBT community in Utah. It’s really community, public radio with very liberal community access guidelines and playing music, selected by the program host, you’ll hear no where else except on FM 90.9. Give them some money RUNNERS UP: X96, KUER
BEST TELEVISION NEWS
Fox 13
“If it bleeds, it leads” on FOX 13? Nah, but “If it’s gay, it plays” on the newscast. Very friendly, very objective and very accessible on-air personalities. Now a top rated news operation that even straight people can enjoy. RUNNERS UP: KUTV 2, KTVX 4
MOST FABULOUS ORGANIZATIONS BEST SOCIAL GROUP
blackBOOTS
blackBOOTS has taken control of the local leather/fetish community and shown it who’s boss. With monthly meetups, sponsored gear nights, fetish gear swap meets, and educational events, blackBOOTS has something to offer everyone from the vaguely curious to the trussed, gagged, and blindfolded. RUNNERS UP: MATRONS OF MAYHEM, SALT LAKE MEN’S CHOIR
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BEST SPORTS GROUP
Pride Softball Salt Lake’s all-inclusive softball league, Pride League hits a home run this year, garnering a Fabby award. The league is more than 20 years old, and many of the players are doubled that in age. Haha! Congrats and many happy returns. RUNNERS UP: Q KICKBALL LEAGUE
BEST POLITICAL GROUP
Equality Utah
Talk about upping their game and on a roll, Equality Utah has become a powerhouse in Utah politics. Taken seriously in government counsels and putting on Utah’s biggest annual political event, the Allies Dinner, EU has built a great structure on the fine foundation laid by brave LGBT leaders and donors 16 years ago RUNNERS UP: UTAH STONEWALL DEMOCRATS, UTAH WOMEN UNITE
BEST HEALTH/HIV GROUP
Utah AIDS Foundation Over 35 years of offering testing, advocacy, prevention, support and education around HIV and Aids issues. It’s been a place of comfort for thousands and a training ground for many health and social justice warriors. Some of us got our first condom from UAF and many our first STI test. Fabby well deserved. RUNNERS UP: MR. FRIENDLY, PPAU
BEST GROUP FOR YOUTH
VOA Youth Resource Center Fabulousness = Volunteers, and the Volunteers of America Youth Resource Center is the epicenter. Homeless individuals may go to the Center for a shower, to do laundry or food and shelter RUNNERS UP: UPC, ENCIRCLE
BEST GROUP TO DONATE MONEY TO
Utah Pride Center
Fabulousness = Donating, and the Utah Pride Center is the epicenter. UPC’s many outreach
and educational programs, and uplifting social events make it a Fabby award-winner once again. RUNNERS UP: UAF, PPAU
MOST FABULOUS PEOPLE BEST BARTENDER AT A GAY BAR
TIE: David “Hammy” Hamilton/Try-Angles, Riley Reichter/ SunTrapp The Most Fabulous Bartender winds up in a tie this year, and it’s possibly because giving a Fabby posthumously is sometimes unfortunately necessary. The brighter note is that “Hammy” last month did not fall victim to homicide by one of “Those Bitches” at Angles. Phew! Riley, on the other hand, was working on the day of Hammy’s supposed demise, bringing joy to SunTrapp patrons, and there’s no better cocktail maker then Riley. Bam! RUNNERS UP: DAVID WILLEITNER/ ANGLES, MICHAEL GRUNDY/SUN TRAPP
BEST DJ AT A GAY BAR
DJ Flame Fatale/ Austin Vance — JAM Club Jam needs its own primetime television dance show. It’s huge popularity is thanks in part to DJ Flame Fatale who has snuffed the competition for the coveted Fabby award. Woohoo! RUNNERS UP: DJ NAOMI — SUNTRAPP, DJ BOY TOY/JESSE — ANGLES
BEST LEADER OF AN LGBT GROUP
Jason CoZmo/ Viva La Diva
Jason CoZmo is a cosmic celebrity and his Viva La Diva show is sweeping the Fabby awards this year, so if you haven’t seen the show, best make it happen or face the wrath of Dolly’s brassiere!
RUNNERS UP: MICHAEL SANDERS/ BLACKBOOTS, BRAD CASE/UGLCC, CAROL GNADE/UPC
BEST ANNUAL LGBT EVENT
Utah Pride
Utah pride grows exponentially each year and because of the awesome support of Utah’s citizens, gay and straight, this event should end up in the history books as a progressive and an encouraging movement. RUNNERS UP: UGLCC MEMBERSHIP PARTY, DAMN THESE HEELS, HRC GALA
BEST MONTHLY/QUARTERLY LGBT EVENT
UGLCC weekly events
The Utah Gay, Lesbian Chamber of Commerce’s events secure a Fabby this year. It’s nothing like the White House Adult Daycare Center. Just saying! RUNNERS UP: BLACKBOOTS, BIG GAY FUN BUS
BEST POLITICIAN FOR THE LGBT COMMUNITY
Jim Dabakis
“Jim Dabakis” is a brand name for LGBT political action. If something is going on he’s there to support (or oppose if necessary), comment, found, finance and make a speech. It seems being Utah State Senator from the Second District and political type is his full time job, but he’s and entrepreneur and been involved in the visual arts business for a long time. RUNNERS UP: JACKIE BISKUPSKI, DEREK KITCHEN
BEST RADIO PERSONALITY
Radio From Hell: Bill Allred, Gina Barberi, Kerry Jackson One of this trio has been Raising Hell on radio since he was on a “one lunger” in Ogden in 1986. Now the longest running show on Utah air, except for Tradio in Richfield. RUNNERS UP: DOUG FABRIZIO DAVE & DEB IN THE MORNING: DAVE GUNDERSON, DEB TURPIN
BEST TELEVISION NEWS ANCHOR/ PERSONALITY — FEMALE
Shauna Lake — KUTV 2 Q readers name Shauna Lake the Most Fabulous female news anchor/personality. Most likely though it’s because she rocks in the front of the camera.
RUNNERS UP: HOPE WOODSIDE — FOX 13, MARY NICKELS — KUTV 2
BEST TELEVISION NEWS ANCHOR/ PERSONALITY — MALE
Big Budah — Fox 13
Male news anchor/personality goes to Big Budah. Well duh! He’s adorable, engaging and oodles of fun. Plus, the LGBT community is envious of his kick-back job.
RUNNERS UP: DAN RASCON — KUTV 2, CHASE THOMASON — KUTV 2
BEST TELEVISION NEWS REPORTER
Ben Winslow — Fox 13 Ben Winslow is a multi-platform journalist, experimenting with new technologies and ways of sharing news across multiple platforms — hence at least his 2nd Fabby for Most Fabulous Blogger/Tweeter —.and his profile on fox13now.com credits QSaltLake in part for his popularity, and that’s fabulous! RUNNERS UP: ROD DECKER — KUTV 2, D.J. BOLERJACK — KUTV 2
BEST NEWS BLOGGER/TWEETER
Ben Winslow — Fox 13 Furthermore, Winslow is known for “live-tweeting” news events. He has covered some of Utah’s biggest stories over a nearly 20-year career in news working in newspaper, radio, digital and television. Also he’s soft on the eyes, right?
RUNNERS UP: SHAUNA BROCK, MELINDA MESERVY
BEST QSALTLAKE COLUMNIST
Ben Williams
LGBT historian Ben Williams keeps our many, many years of hard work, progression and fallbacks alive and well. That is necessary as welll as fabulous! RUNNERS UP: PETUNIA PAP SMEAR, ROCK MAGEN, CHARLES FROST
42 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT
CONCERTS Ani DiFranco is kicking ass and taking names in support of her new album: “Binary on Righteous Babe Records.” The iconic singer/songwriter/activist/poet/DIY trendsetter returns to territory that brought her to the world’s attention more than 25 years ago. She has been recognized among the feminist pantheon for her entrepreneurship, social activism, and outspoken political lyrics. Generational music icons, Morrissey and Katy Perry, also take to Utah stages this month. If you’re over 40 and relate to “the low of high school,” or under 60 and appreciate super divas, then you’ll enjoy their unique concert presence.
Tony’s 4 Gay Agenda 18
SATURDAY — ANI DIFRANCO
Delta Performance Hall, Eccles Theater, 131 S. Main St, 8pm. Tickets $25-55, artsaltlake.org
BY TONY HOBDAY
SATURDAY — MORRISSEY Kingsbury Hall, 1395 E. Presidents Cir., UofU, 8pm. Tickets $55-85, kingtix.com
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SATURDAY — KATY PERRY: WITNESS THE TOUR 2017
Vivint Smart Home Arena, 301 S. West Temple, 7:30pm. Tickets $47.50-147.50, smithstix.com
DANCE RDT spotlights work by its most prolific alumni choreographer, William “Bill” Evans, a magnetic dance-maker known for his versatility and style. The performance features an eclectic range of music from Vivaldi to the 3hattrio, plus a tribute to the “King of Swing,” Mr. Benny Goodman. East Indian, tap and electronic rhythms will make this entertaining and nostalgic evening of dance unforgettable … and possibly, mind-swirling. One of Ballet West’s most popular ballets has been updated. Artistic director Adam Sklute brings a brand new version of Carmina Burana, created by resident choreographer Nicolo Fonte as a co-production with Cincinnati Ballet. Carmina Burana will surge with transformative power and drama when an immense chorus joins the dancers on-stage singing Carl Orff’s unforgettable score.
3 16
FRIDAY — CARMINA BURANA
Janet Quinney Lawson Capitol Theatre, 50 W 200 South, 7:30pm, through Nov. 11. Tickets $29–87, artsaltlake.org
THURSDAY — TOP BILL
Jeanne Wagner Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. 300 South, 7:30pm, through Saturday. Tickets $30, artsaltlake.org
SPECIAL ENGAGEMENTS “White Rabbit, Red Rabbit” is sealed inside an envelope. The new person reading it each night has never seen it. In fact, they’ve only been told what is absolutely necessary. Slyly humorous and audaciously pointed, this “theater entertainment meets social experiment” is unlike anything, and will make you question everything. Comedy legend and Karen Walker’s other guilty pleasure,
Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 273 | NOVEMBER 2017
John Cleese, will share stories of his life, as well as, Karen’s strange proclivities, and you may finally find out the airspeed of an unladen swallow -- again, more about Karen! Before John silly walks on to the stage, excitement will build as the audience reacquaints with “Monty Python and the Holy Grail” on the big screen.
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SATURDAY — WHITE RABBIT, RED Rabbit Kingsbury Hall, 1395 E. Presidents Cir., UofU, 7:30pm weekends through Dec. 2. Tickets $20, kingtix.com SUNDAY — JOHN CLEESE LIVE! Delta Performance Hall, Eccles Theater, 131 S. Main St, 7pm. Tickets $35-275, artsaltlake.org
THEATRE Pygmalion is under a spell! Leandra, Skye and Fioon are witches ... good witches, but witches nevertheless. They have been hired by to perform in a new play called “MacBeth,” that’s written in tandem with a playwright known to the witches as “The Brad,” aka Shakespeare. Not completely savvy to a theatre setting these weird sisters grapple with how they fit into the fabric of the play, how they contribute to Macbeth’s story, and if they should somehow alter the final act. Plan-B is under siege! The actors of the Norwegian National Theatre find themselves in an uneasy truce with Nazi cultural authorities during the German occupation of Norway. When they are forced to perform a Nazi propaganda piece, conscience comes face to face with The Final Solution. “The Ice Front” questions what it means to be an artist, to be a patriot, to be human. Utah Repertory Theater Company, after recently winning a 1st Amendment rights issue, presents “The Bridges of Madison County.” A beautiful Italian woman who married an American soldier to flee war-ravaged Italy looks forward to a rare four days alone on her Iowa farm when her family heads to the 1965 State Fair. When ruggedly handsome photographer, Robert Kincaid, pulls into her driveway seeking directions, what happens in those four days may very well alter the course of Francesca’s life.
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FRIDAY — THE WEYWARD SISTERS
Black Box Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. 300 South, times vary, through Nov. 18. Tickets $20, artsaltlake.org
THURSDAY — THE ICE FRONT
Studio Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. 300 South, times vary, through Nov. 19. Tickets $20, artsaltlake.org
SATURDAY — THE BRIDGES OF MADISON COUNTY
St. Regents Black Box, Eccles Theater, 131 S. Main St, times vary, through Dec. 10. Tickets TBA, artsaltlake.org
UPCOMING EVENTS Dec. 14, Lady Gaga, smithstix.com Feb. 8, Walk the Moon, smithstix.com April 11-17, 2018, Hamilton, artsaltlake.org
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11 tunes to keep you calm, collected and engaged in our current political climate BY CHRIS AZZOPARDI
The resistance
is in full swing, with late-night talk show hosts railing against Donald Trump’s to-tal incompetence as president and oppressed communities uniting to rally for equality. But they’re not the only ones giving freedom, fairness and unconditional-love-for-all a voice as this current administration continues to roll back to medieval times — powerful anthems and hopeful paeans to keep the momentum going no matter how world-weary we may get are coming from all sides, many sides. So, next time you find yourself falling down the dark, divisive abyss of state-of-the-world despair, crank up one of these pick-meups — from Pink’s new rally cry “What About Us” to Miguel’s powerful Black Lives Matter anthem — and pull yourself up and out. We need you.
PINK, ‘WHAT ABOUT US’ Just days after Heather Heyer was killed for standing up against hate-spewing white suprema-cists in Charlottesville, Virginia, Pink’s call-to-action video for the first single from her upcoming album, Beautiful Trauma, was chillingly art imitating life, the rich choreography mirroring the emotional fervor resulting from minority persecution. No stranger to political smackdowns — Pink’s “Dear Mr. President” slammed George W. Bush — pop’s fearless rebellion doesn’t shy from cutting remarks about our new non-leading leader (“You sold us down the river too far”). Feeling duped, she scolds, “Enough is enough,” before taking the impassioned track’s melanchol-ic and Trump-confronting lyrics to the frontlines of freedom: “It’s the start of us waking up… are you ready? I’ll be ready.” The answer is: Yes, Pink, we’re ready.
TORI AMOS, ‘BANG’ “Bang,” from Amos’ new album and most political to date, Native Invader, confronts political hot topics head on — no fake news here. But somehow, while ripping into the White House’s white politics and acknowledging Trump’s failed ban on immigrants (“that’s who we all are”), the equal-rights advocate and outspoken
feminist takes a break from the broken world to find stillness and beauty in a shooting star, an offering of much-needed healing. Her sage advice is to “out-create,” but finding that star can’t hurt.
KESHA, ‘WOMAN’ You don’t have to be a woman to enjoy the hell out of Kesha’s raw, lit ode to all the (single) la-dies of the world. “I’m a motherfucking woman, baby, that’s right,” she defiantly roars, wielding themes of self-love, individuality and getting your own weed while sticking it to the patriarchy over a saucy brass track sure to put pig-headed men in their place. Take heed all you nasty wom-en… and nasty men who love those women to pieces.
TYLER GLENN, ‘DEVIL’ AND ‘JOHN, GIVE ‘EM HELL’ During “Devil,” a bit of hard-earned joy from Tyler Glenn’s Excommunication album, the Ne-on Trees frontman casts a side grin at the religious right when he says, “I think the devil made me,” before acknowledging that abandoning the Mormon Church permitted him to fully accept himself as a gay man. Much like “John, Give ’Em Hell,” written for John Dehlin, a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints who was excommunicated from the church in 2015, it’s hopeful and nurturing.
LANA DEL REY, ‘CHANGE’ Never the optimist, the brooding singer-songwriter felt her latest album, Lust for Life, was not complete without one last song… and it’s hopeful? Indeed, it is; that song is the brighter-days rumination “Change,” wherein Del Rey is all of us, except with a pretty piano melody that you’ll want to loop until a real leader can actually fulfill his promise of making America great.
BEYONCÉ, ‘FREEDOM’ Is there anything more Beyoncé than Beyoncé serving womanly willpower while refusing to bend to her oppressors? “Freedom,” an explosive Lemonade touchstone, is the thunder during the storm, marching on like a modern-day civ-
il-rights anthem and featuring a fiery rap from Kendrick Lamar. Freedom fighters, get in formation.
CUPCAKKE, ‘LGBT’ You can count on Chicago-based rapper cupcakKe’s ally anthem “LGBT” to keep you feeling fierce. Her rainbow-flag-waving celebration of all things queer comes at you fast and hard with a bangin’ bassline and the perfect sentiment for anyone who dares mess with the spitfire’s underdogs: “Fuck out my way when you see me, I’m rollin’ with the LGBT.”
MILEY CYRUS, ‘INSPIRED’ When you’re not coming at Trump’s America like a wrecking ball, take a deep breath and let Adult AF Miley inspirit your queerness by sheer example. While seeking answers to questions that seem unanswerable and finding refuge in happy memories with her father, Cyrus also re-minds us all that just merely being ourselves can turn the tide: “Pull the handle on the door that opens up to change, I know that sounds so strange, ’cause you’ve always felt so small, but know you aren’t at all.”
MIGUEL, ‘HOW MANY’ You know that prayer-hand emoji “do-gooders” post to their socials as if that’s the answer to hurricane relief and equality? R&B singer Miguel denounces said futile sentiments on “How Many,” a powerful protest song instilling sense and ownership into those blind to this country’s troubling race problem.
ANDRA DAY, ‘RISE UP’ Andra Day has the right idea: “We’ll rise up in spite of the ache.” During the global women’s march in January and a Muslim-travel-ban march shortly thereafter and every Black Lives Matter march, we have; and with this soaring soul ballad offering mountain-moving fortitude, we will continue to rise and resist. Q Chris Azzopardi is the editor of Q Syndicate. Reach him via his website at www.chris-azzopardi.com and on Twitter (@ chrisazzopardi).
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Don’t Be Stupid, You Know Shania Loves You Country-pop icon on being ‘inspired by the spirit’ of the LGBTQ community, equality (it’s a ‘no-brainer’) and her unifying hit songs BY CHRIS AZZOPARDI
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Contrary
to popular belief, some things do impress Shania Twain. The country-pop icon and paragon of leopard print has great admiration for her LGBTQ fans, who she says have become guiding lights in her own life. Twain’s inspiring story is one of survival, from her childhood hardships while growing up in the small town of Timmins, Ontario, where she raised her three younger siblings after her parents died in a car accident in 1987, to her 2009 divorce from Robert “Mutt” Lange, producer of Twain’s 1997 crossover behemoth Come on Over. The best-selling country album of all time was a game-changer with an impressive track record — 40 million copies sold globally, 50 weeks atop the Billboard country charts over three years, 11 singles released — that Twain still champions in the female-artist arena. Fifteen years after dropping her last juggernaut, 2002’s Up!, Twain, 52, is again demonstrating slay status to her legions of loyal, boot-stompin’ queer fans. Even a neurological voice disorder called dysphonia couldn’t keep the genre subverter, who once thought she’d never sing again, from recording her long-overdue fifth LP, Now. Released in September, Twain wrote every song, and her shiny résumé got even shinier when the album instantly seized the No. 1 spot on the Billboard albums and country charts. Country-pop’s comeback queen was an open book during our recent conversation, speaking passionately and candidly about her LGBTQ activism at the onset of her country career in 1993, having to “agree to disagree” with those who aren’t pro-gay, and bringing drag queens and Bud-guzzlin’ bros together with “Man! I Feel Like a Woman!” But, also, you don’t get Shania Twain on the phone without reminiscing on 1998’s VH1 Divas, when Twain shared the stage with an epic mix of icons — Aretha Franklin, Mariah Carey, Celine Dion and Gloria Estefan — for one of the most legendary, gay-loved nights in diva (and hair) history.
Do you have enough leopard print gloves to go around for all the gays to partake in celebrating your comeback? (Laughs) I should make them, right? What do you think would be the preferred fabric? Silk or…? Velour. Yeah, like, velvet. We need a million of those by tomorrow. But first, Shania, after all these years, how do you explain your connection to the LGBTQ community? I can’t really explain my connection in any sort of theoretical way to anyone. But I would say my intentions are to inspire and connect with people, to be relatable then and now. I think that it is what resonates — we relate to one another, we relate to struggle, and then surviving struggle and celebrating who we are and what we are and appreciating that as a community of people regardless of what it is. Just celebrating together to the anthemic nature of some of those songs, and on this new album there are several like that as well. Is there something specific you hope to convey to LGBTQ audiences with this album? Surviving against the odds. A song like “I’m Alright” – just that statement there and telling yourself, “I’m alright. I’ve made it through. I’ve survived.” And with a fist-in-the-air attitude, with conviction. What was your introduction to the gay community? I work with a lot of gay people and they’re just a part of my almost daily family world. So, they’re just part of my friends and my community. I guess more when I started to become successful, I was really surrounded by more creative people, and there are so many creative people in this industry who are gay, both men and women. It just becomes the norm. During some of your rough patches, did you get any sage advice from your gay friends? Oh, I get good advice from gay friends all the time! (Laughs) I think more than anything I’m inspired by the spirit of where the gay community is right now and that conviction to be who you are. I love standing up for that. It’s just so important to be transparent and open about
who you are and to not hide behind fear. Have you clung to that sentiment as a way to push past your own personal pain? Completely! I mean, my whole transition into where I am now in this moment has been facing fears and taking that leap of faith myself, and that would be my advice to anyone out there. A gay person who has been living behind their fears and then makes that courageous decision to start living as who they really are and stop pretending and embrace it — it takes a lot of courage. For me, I’ve just learned that there’s no time to waste. You need to take that leap and be who you are, and we’re in a society now that is making it easier. We still have a long way to go, but there are a lot more outlets. But the gay community – and minority communities in general — are always fighting. I have a song on the album called “Swingin’ with My Eyes Closed” and it’s a fun party song, but the true depth of the song is about even when you can’t see what is in front of you, you still have to move forward. You can’t move backwards; you gotta keep moving forward and fighting for that freedom to exercise independence and courage. There couldn’t be a better time for a song like that. In 2013, you tweeted about the Supreme Court overturning the Defense of Marriage Act, saying, “Congrats to everyone celebrating equality today in the U.S. #loveislove.” Why is it important for you to take a stand on gay rights and other LGBTQ issues? I just feel very saddened by any kind of oppression in our society in today’s day and age. I mean, it’s so negative. Equality should be a no-brainer, automatic, all the way around. We need to have mutual respect all the way around. Supremacy of any sort is just poison. I just feel like we’re not above each other in any way and mutual respect and an admiration for an individual’s abilities, talents, heart, commitment — I mean, what does that have to do with any minority status that we might be labeled with today, whatever that may be? Cer-
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tainly, I know that gays feel that.
Who most lived up to the diva title during the show? I think Mariah had the biggest hair, so probably her. (Laughs)
How does it feel knowing that your songs “Forever and For Always” and “From this Moment On” have probably been the first dance at a number of same-sex marriages? Awww! That’s lovely. It’s so lovely. But love is beautiful, and music is very much a part of our lives and monumental moments of our lives. Because country music has long been deemed conservative in its views, could we speak as openly as we are now about LGBTQ issues at the beginning of your career? I mean, I did. You know what this is really about? This is about pro-equality, this is about pro-mutual respect. And if you’re really for those things in life, then why would there be any boundaries? Why would you side where there are? Why would you draw a line there? In the country community, I think it comes down to the fear of potentially alienating conservative fans. I think everybody has the right to their opinion, and that I would never argue with. That is a huge part of freedom of speech and mutual respect, having the right to your own opinion. If you’re not pro-gay, then you’re not pro-gay, and we just have to agree to disagree. I would never get into a fist fight with somebody who didn’t agree. I just think that would be counterproductive. So, I think we all have to respect each other’s opinions on these issues. But, listen, with a song like “Man! I Feel Like a Woman!” — and this is, what, 20 years ago? — I’m over that come a long time ago. A lot of straight men sing “Man! I Feel Like a Woman!” just for the sheer entertainment of it. So, I think songs like that have been great, maybe, contributors to bringing us together, if not for anything than just for the common denominator of music and owning that for whatever it means to them, and that breaks down barriers. How do you reflect on your gender-bending style, when you donned menswear, in that video? I like to have a sense of humor about everything, especially things that can have a lot of tension. A song like
“Man! I Feel Like a Woman!” just smacks it dead for me. The audience issue is not something I worry about. I’m respectful to my audience and I appreciate them for relating to my music regardless of their point of view on whatever it is, whether it’s politics or social issues. I’m not here to judge. Tell me about the first time you encountered a Shania drag queen. I went to an imposter show in Las Vegas and it was incredible. You brought up the country world and maybe how that might be more conservative, but it’s funny, three of the artists that were in the show were myself, Reba McEntire and Dolly Parton. I thought that was so wonderful. It’s like, “OK, we’re country artists, and we’re in there!” Any artist that is, on a visual level, very expressive would make a great imposter night subject! What is the one thing a queen cannot go without if they truly want to feel like Shania Twain? Probably something leopard print, and I would say a top hat. The boots, for sure! For gay men everywhere, 1998 was one of the best years as it was the inaugural VH1 Divas, the best and most iconic. It doesn’t get any better than you, Mariah Carey, Gloria Estefan, Celine Dion, Aretha Franklin and guest performer Carole King. Of them, who are you still in touch with? Mariah Carey. Celine Dion. We still cross paths — it’s great. I always like to catch Mariah when she is live, and Celine too. It was such a wonderful group of ladies, really terrific.
You were second, I think. I was! I said, “OK, I gotta look at Mariah’s hair. I want to try for it to be as big as hers,” because she has this naturally big, amazing hair. So I’m like, “Come on, let’s go for it. I know Mariah’s gonna have bigger hair than me, so I’m gonna go for it and have fun with it.” She has that hair that I want, that naturally big hair with this gorgeous wave and those ringlets. When you all performed “Natural Woman” as your encore, I wasn’t sure who was stealing the spotlight: Mariah’s hair or Aretha. (Laughs) I know! Nobody can kill Aretha’s spotlight. If you did another Divas, what other diva would you want to sing alongside? Rihanna, for sure. She’s just so awesome. I love her voice; I never get tired of it. Never, never. And we hear it so much on the radio, right? She’s every second song on the radio and I just never get tired of it. Even with “Love on the Brain” — I mean, it just doesn’t get better than that. So, she’d definitely be on my list. I’m hoping for you and Taylor to team up — our two country-gone-pop queens. Taylor would be a good one. She’d be a must on Divas, for sure. She’s awesome. She’s such a great creative person and a super songwriter and really uses her brain, so it’s lovely to watch her. Lastly, how many costume changes can gay audiences look forward to when you hit the road? (Laughs) How many would a gay audience find ideal, do you think? At least 15. (Laughs) Whoa. OK, that is a friggin’ high demand. I’d have to change every two songs! As long as you bring out the iconic ensembles, no harm, no foul. Gotta have a little flashback moment here and there, yeah! Q As editor of Q Syndicate, Chris Azzopardi has interviewed a multitude of superstars, including Meryl Streep, Mariah Carey and Beyoncé. Reach him via his website at www. chris-azzopardi.com and on Twitter (@chrisazzopardi).
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food & drink Beaujolais Nouveau Day — Nov 16, 2017
Beaujolais
Nouveau Day is marked in France on the third Thursday in November with fireworks, music and festivals. Under French law, the wine is released at 12:01 a.m., just weeks after the wine’s grapes have been harvested. Parties are held throughout the country and further afield to celebrate the first wine of the season. There are about 120 Beaujolais Nouveau related festivals held in the Beaujolais region. The most famous —Les Sarmentelles—is held in the town of Beaujeu, the capital of the Beaujolais region. Kicking off in the early evening the day before Beaujolais Nouveau, the five-day festival features wine tasting, live music and dancing. During the afternoon on Beaujolais Nouveau Day, a heated tent offers wine and a range of local foods for visitors to sample. There is also a tasting contest featuring all of the twelve kinds of Beaujolais, in which the winner nets
his or her weight in Beaujolais-Villages. In the evening, a torch lit parade honours the farmers that made the wine. Fireworks at midnight mark the release of the new wine, which is then drank until dawn. Beaujolais Nouveau is meant to be drunk young. Most vintages should be consumed by the following May after its release. However, in excellent vintages (such as 2000) the wine can live much longer and can be enjoyed until the next harvest rolls around. The wine goes well with either haute cuisine or Friday night’s pizza. Beaujolais Nouveau – that much-ballyhooed cherry-red colored vintage that’s best served chilled — is clearly not for wine snobs. This fresh and fruity red is the result of a quick fermentation process that ends up with a tasty, clean wine that is enjoyed by palates the world over. Perhaps the most well-known producer of Beaujolais Nouveau is Georges Duboeuf, who is credited as one of the mar-
keting geniuses behind the wine. Selling this young red was viewed by some vintners as a means to clear large quantities of wine at decent profits, which would create a much-needed cash flow shortly after harvest. In 2010, 35 million bottles of the wine were put on the market. Some 7.5 million were sold in French supermarkets and 15.5 million were exported mainly to Japan, Germany and the United States. Beaujolais Nouveau owes its easy drinkability to a winemaking process called carbonic maceration, also known as whole-berry fermentation. This technique preserves the fresh, fruity quality of the grapes without extracting bitter tannins from the grape skins. Q
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48 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | COMICS
Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 273 | NOVEMBER 2017
NOVEMBER 2017 | ISSUE 273 | Qsaltlake.com
COMICS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 49
50 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | MARKETPLACE
marketplace
Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 273 | NOVEMBER 2017
DJ SERVICE S
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NOVEMBER 2017 | ISSUE 273 | Qsaltlake.com
INSURANCE
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MARKETPLACE | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 51
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52 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | PETS
Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 273 | NOVEMBER 2017
Each Sudoku puzzle has a unique solution which can be reached logically without guessing. Enter digits 1 through 9 into the blank spaces. Every row must contain one of each digit, as must each column and each 3x3 square. Qdoku
Q doku Medium
8 9 6 7
1
3 9
4
9
8
4 7 9
9 8 4 5 6
9 4 2 3
4 9 8
6
2 3
3 1 9 7 6 8
9 1
1 9 2 4
2 8
8 9 3
7 9 1 6
6
3 5 4 1 5
4
1 6 7 4 1 8
6 3 2 4
5
8
2
6 9 8 8 1 3 2
4 1 7
2 9 8 7
8 6 4 1
4 5 9 6 9 7 5 8 6
4 9 8 4
1 6 9 6
2 4
2 4 3 9
2 8
7
7
3 9 6
8 6 4
5 8
for napping buddies.
7
9 1 6 8 8
Give thanks
4
7 6 3
Adopt a cat for just $10.* And adopt a second feline friend for free! November 1 – 22 All pets are spayed or neutered, vaccinated, microchipped and ready to go home today. Best Friends Pet Adoption Center 2005 South 1100 East, Salt Lake City Open Monday-Saturday, 11 am to 7 pm • Sunday, 11 am to 4 pm bestfriendsutah.org *Promotion applies to cats four months and older.
Together, we can Save Them All. ®
q scopes NOVEMBER BY SAM KELLEY-MILLS ARIES March 20–April 19 Trouble is lurking around every corner, but you are often the source of your own plight. Lower standards but don’t compromise. Allow for some breathing room and get a grip. Take time to phone a friend or enjoy a social gathering. The salt of the Earth comes not from the external, but from within. TAURUS Apr 20–May 20 Make intentions clear when dealing family or a partner. Some things are bothersome but keeping them inside is not a solution. At the same time, try to find compassion, not enjoyment, when others apologize for doing wrong. It is always better to receive than to give, at least in this case. GEMINI May 21–June 20 The true method for getting over something is b simply moving on. You have a knack for letting things roll off, despite what others might think. Make sure to focus on the positive aspects and get hands-on when coming
up with creative solutions to the plight of others. You are always happy to help. CANCER June 21–July 22 No one likes a sore loser, but it is hard to conceal when it’s time to heal. The competition has been rough lately, and making you anxious. Some people like it rough and need to be put in their place. Demonstrate desires by being sweet and sensitive on the outside and in. Kill with kindness. LEO July 23–August 22 A slippery situation may lead to blushing. Nothing can overcome hurt feelings, but memories can fade quickly by not making a big deal. Move on and have an adventure with a good friend. Climb mountains, watch movies, and play the games that bring joy. Do the unexpected and get kind of messy. VIRGO August 23–Sep. 22 The difference between happiness and anger is attitude. Be happy first and satisfaction will follow. This is especially true in the bedroom, where things have been a little stale. Keep things fresh by making a change, and others are bound to react in kind. Now is the time
for a romance.
count.
LIBRA Sept 23–October 22 Fear leads to avoidance in business or a personal matter. The separation between the two has become blurred. Find clarity by starting fresh. Don’t forget to include all the people who mean the most in our everyday task, and take the time to ensure they are part of the new you. Shine Libra!
CAPRICORN Dec 21–Jan 19 Define yourself for you and you alone. The solo route can be rewarding, especially if you haven’t done it for a while. It will be interesting to see how others accept your new found identity. Those who know you well have seen this before. You’re always on a quest to better yourself so keep it up.
SCORPIO Oct. 23–Nov. 21 There is little reason to worry. Remind those causing problems that they are human too, capable of messing up too. Keeping humble will impress a friend or colleague, leading to some very nice times. Enjoy getting down and dirty with someone who has a tendency to play around, but be safe.
AQUARIUS Jan. 20–Feb. 18 Inspiration is sometimes hard to find, so get the creative juices flowing with romantic roleplaying. Have a group activity. The more, the merrier. Only then will a construct of ideas develop into a plausible solution. The world can make thing complicated, but maybe it’s you this time.
SAGITTARIUS Nov. 22–December 20. It isn’t wrong to show gratitude, but the limits of generosity will be tested at this time. A wait-and-see approach to mutual giving is a good idea. Remember, it may feel nice to provide services. But ultimately, and empty box wrapped is still an empty box so be sure your offerings
PISCES Feb 19–Mar 19 Keep with working traditions. There are social gathering coming, starting the drama that is best avoided. Tell family and friends ahead of time about a goal of keeping the peace. Find the harmony within each moment. Spreading the love is never a bad idea. In fact, it could be your true calling. Q
SEPT. 2017 | ISSUE 273 | Qsaltlake.com
Pet of the Month
Off-Leash Dog Parks
NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 53
magazine qsaltlake.com
MEMORY GROVE OFF LEASH ➋ AREA AT FREEDOM TRAIL COTTONWOOD PARK ➏ ➑ 1580 W 300 N
PIONEER PARK ➏
375 N CANYON RD
➎ LINDSEY GARDENS DOG PARK 9TH AVE AND M STREET
380 S 300 W
JORDAN DOG PARK ➏ 1060 S 900 W
➌ HERMAN FRANKS PARK 750 E 1300 S
PARLEY’S NATURE PRESERVE ➊ (TANNER PARK) 2740 S 2700 E
MILLRACE OFF-LEASH DOG PARK ➐ 1200 W 5400 S
WEST JORDAN OFF-LEASH ➍ DOG PARK
TYPICAL DOG PARK RULES • Current license and rabies tag • Human companions clean up waste • Damage to landscape prohibited • Aggressive dogs prohibited • No chasing or harassing wildlife • Swimming in authorized areas only • Dogs under 4 months prohibited • Dogs off leash in posted areas only
5982 W NEW BINGHAM HWY
ROY CITY DOG PARK 5700 S 3260 W, ROY
OGDEN CITY DOG PARK 2450 SOUTH A ST, OGDEN
SOUTH OGDEN DOG PARK
4150 SOUTH PALMER DR, OGDEN
JC SNOW DOG PARK
Apricot 6.5 months old Domestic short hair - black Spayed female Hello friends! I’m a young gal who would prefer a calm home environment. Don’t I have the most silky black fur? Once I’m settled in a home, I love to play with feather wand toys. I will seek out affection from my person once I am comfortable with them. I would love to live with another cat who could show me how to come out of my shell. Adoption fee is $10 through November, or 2 for 1 adoption fees for adult cats. For more information, go to Best Friends Animal Society–Utah, 2005 S 1100 East, or call 801-574-2454 or go to bestfriendsutah.org
900 S 400 E, ST GEORGE
SPONSORED BY:
➍ SANDY DOG PARK 9980 S 300 E
54 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | QMMUNITY
HEALTH & HIV
Northern Utah HIV/ AIDS Project Walk-Ins Tues Noon–5pm 536 24th St, Ste 2B, Ogden 801-393-4153 Peer Support for Mental Illness — PSMI Fridays, 6pm at Utah Pride Ctr, 255 E 400 S Planned Parenthood 654 S 900 E 800-230-PLAN Salt Lake County Health Dept HIV/STD Clinic 660 S 200 E, 4th Floor Walk-ins M–F 10a–4p Appts 385-468-4242 Utah AIDS Foundation utahaids.org * mail@utahaids.org 1408 S 1100 E 801-487-2323 HOMELESS SVCS
Volunteers of America Homeless Youth Resource Ctr, ages 15–21 880 S 400 W 801-364-0744 Transition Homes: Young Men’s 801-433-1713 Young Women’s 801-359-5545
POLITICAL
Equality Utah equalityutah.org * info@equalityutah.org 175 W 200 S, Ste 1004 801-355-3479 Utah Libertarian Party 6885 S State St #200 888-957-8824 Utah Log Cabin Republicans bit.ly/logcabinutah 801-657-9611 Utah Stonewall Democrats utahstonewalldemocrats.org RELIGIOUS
First Baptist Church firstbaptist-slc.org * office@firstbaptistslc.org 11a Sundays 777 S 1300 E 801-582-4921 Sacred Light of Christ slcchurch.org 823 S 600 E 801-595-0052 11a Sundays Wasatch Metropolitan Community Church wasatchmcc.org 801-889-8764 Sundays, 11a at UPC SOCIAL
1 to 5 Club (bisexual) fb.me/ 1to5ClubUtah
JUST DO IT
Alternative Garden Club bit.ly/altgarden * altgardenclub@gmail.com
Utah Bears utahbears.com fb.me/ utahbears info@utahbears.com Weds 6pm Raw Bean Coffee, 611 W Temple
blackBOARD Men’s Kink/Sex/BDSM education, 1st, 3rd Mondays blackbootsslc.org
Utah Male Naturists umen.org info@umen.org
blackBOOTS Kink/BDSM Men’s leather/kink/ fetish/BDSM meets 4th Saturdays blackbootsslc.org
Utah Pride Center utahpridecenter.org thecenter@ utahpridecenter.org 255 E 400 S 801-539-8800
Gay Writes writing group, DiverseCity 6:30 pm Mondays Community Writing Ctr, 210 E 400 S Ste 8
SPORTS
Pride Community Softball League prideleague.com pcsl@prideleague.com
Get Outside Utah bit.ly/GetOutsideUtah Men Who Move menwhomove.org
Q Kickball League qkickball.com Sundays, 10:30, 11:30, Sunnyside Park
OUTreach Utah outreachutah.org Ogden, 3350 Harrison, 2nd, 4th Weds, 4-6pm Logan, 596 E 900 N — Fri, 4:30-7:30pm
QUAC — Queer Utah Aquatic Club quacquac.org questions@ quacquac.org
qVinum Wine Tasting qvinum.com
Salt Lake Goodtime Bowling League bit.ly/slgoodtime
Rainbow Classic Car Don R. Austin 801-485-9225
Stonewall Shooting Sports of Utah fb.me/stonewall. sportsofutah
Sage Utah fb.me/sageutah sageutah@ utahpridecenter.org 801-557-9203
Venture Out Utah fb.me/groups/ Venture.OUT.Utah
Temple Squares Square Dance Club templesquares.org Weekly dances every other Thurs 7p at UPC 801-449-1293
YOUTH/COLLEGE
Gay-Straight Alliance Network gsanetwork.org
PUZZLE SOLUTIONS
9 4 2 6 1 8 7 3 5
8 5 1 7 3 2 6 9 4
6 7 3 9 5 4 1 8 2
2 1 7 3 6 9 5 4 8
3 9 5 8 4 7 2 1 6
8 2 6 4 7 1 3 5 9 4 6 8 1 2 5 9 7 3
5 2 9 4 7 3 8 6 1 7 2 3 9 5 4 7 1 6 8 3 2
7 3 6 2 8 1 4 5 9 6 8 1 3 7 2 8 4 5 6 9 1
1 8 4 5 9 6 3 2 7 9 5 4 1 6 8 3 9 2 5 4 7
5 7 2 4 3 8 6 9 1
9 4 3 1 7 6 2 8 5
6 1 8 5 9 2 7 4 3
3 4 2 5 9 1 7 8 6 3 1 5 4 2 9 8 3 1 7 6 5
5 9 1 7 6 8 2 3 4 8 6 9 5 1 7 6 4 9 3 8 2
6 7 8 2 4 3 1 9 5 2 4 7 8 3 6 5 7 2 1 4 9
6 4 3 1 5 7 2 9 8 4 5 3 6 1 2 8 7 9
7 9 8 4 2 6 5 3 1 9 8 7 4 3 5 6 2 1
2 5 1 3 9 8 6 7 4 1 2 6 8 7 9 5 4 3
3 6 4 9 1 5 8 2 7 2 3 9 1 8 6 4 5 7
9 7 5 2 8 3 4 1 6 7 1 5 3 2 4 9 6 8
1 8 2 7 6 4 9 5 3 8 6 4 9 5 7 3 1 2
Utah’s Inclusive Aquatic Club since 1995 BEGINNERS WELCOME EVERYONE’S INVITED
4 1 3 2 5 9 7 6 8
UMEN.ORG
7 9 5 6 8 3 2 1 4
NAKED
6 3 7 1 2 4 9 8 5
BUSINESS
LGBTQ-Affirmative Psycho-therapists Guild of Utah lgbtqtherapists.com * jim@lgbtqtherapists.com Utah Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce utahgaychamber.com * info@utahgaychamber.com Vest Pocket Business Coalition vestpocket.org 801-596-8977
YWCA of Salt Lake ywca.org/saltlakecity 322 E 300 S 801-537-8600
LEGAL
Rainbow Law Free Clinic 2nd Thurs 6–7:30pm Utah Pride Center. 255 East and 400 South in Salt Lake City.
2 4 9 5 3 8 1 7 6
ALCOHOL & DRUG
Alcoholics Anonymous 801-484-7871 utahaa.org Gay and Lesbianspecific meetings: Sundays 3p Acceptance Group, UPC, 255 E 400 S Mondays 7p Gay Men’s Stag (Big Book Study), UPC, 255 E 400 S 8p G/Q Women’s Mtg, Disability Law Center (rear), 205 N 400 W Tuesday 8:15p Live & Let Live, UPC, 255 E 400 S Wednesday 7p Sober Today, 375 Harrison Blvd, Ogden Friday 8p Stonewall Group, UPC, 255 E 400 S Crystal Meth Anon crystalmeth.org Thursday 1:30p Unity In Sobriety, UPC, 255 E 400 S
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-7233
5 8 1 9 6 7 4 2 3
Qmmunity Groups
Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 273 | NOVEMBER 2017
Salt Lake Community College Equality Involvement Club 8 facebook.com/slcc. equality University of Utah LGBT Resource Center 8 lgbt.utah.edu 200 S Central Campus Dr Rm 409 801-587-7973 Univ. of Utah Queer Student Union utahqsu@gmail.com USGA at BYU byuusga.wordpress.com fb.co/UsgaAtByu Utah State Univ. Access & Diversity Ctr usu.edu/ accesscenter/lgbtqa Utah Valley Univ Spectrum discord.me/ spectrumatuvu facebook.com/ groups/uvuspectrum Weber State Univ Faculty/Staff GayStraight Alliance organizations.weber. edu/fsgsa fsgsa@weber.edu Weber State University LGBT Resource Center weber.edu/ lgbtresourcecenter 3885 W Campus Dr, Student Services Ctr, Suite 154 Dept. 2125 801-626-7271
A&E | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 55
NOVEMBER 2017 | ISSUE 273 | Qsaltlake.com
mr. manners
We have so much to be thankful for BY ROCK MAGEN
I love
the fall. The colors, the clothes, the food — everything is an absolute favorite. As we leave September and head into October and November, I am always extremely excited for the upcoming festivities — especially Thanksgiving. But this holiday goes beyond the delicious food and upcoming sales; at its core, it’s a time of reflection and service. In the past month, we have had a lot of unfortunate events taking place in our country. From floods to shootings, it seems that each day the news is bringing us word of a new disaster. Some people find it hard to be thankful because of the suffering and difficulties they have experienced. In those moments of heartache, I tend to reflect on the words of Tennessee Williams from “The Glass Menagerie” — “…Life’s not easy, it calls for Spartan endurance.” Beyond the events in the media, our local Utah LGBT community also is in need during this time of year. Everyday members of the LGBT community suffer from circumstances which prevent them from having access to housing, food or other basic needs. So, what can we do about it? A common way to show
your thanks is to serve those in need during the season. Service comes in many forms. It can range from a monetary contribution to volunteering within the community. No act of service goes unnoticed. As part of my Thanksgiving traditions I like to show my gratitude for what I have by giving back to those who are in need. I am fortunate enough to have an employer who sponsors a Pride group, and during the holidays we coordinate events which allow for any employee to participate and give back. We volunteer in the community and even build food baskets to make sure that those in need do not go without. Perhaps your employer has a similar resource, but if not, Utah is filled with LGBT resources who need our help in delivering on their missions. So, what does the Thanksgiving holiday mean to you? Is it time for family and special dinners? Anticipation of Black Friday shopping and football games? Whatever the reason, make sure that it is something you are proud of. If done right, Thanksgiving is an opportunity to regain time with loved ones and remember who we are and what we stand for. Take time this year to make some new traditions and give back if you can. Who knows, you may fall in love with the season all over again. Q
Politics Makes Strange Bedfellow ACROSS
50 Angelina Jolie’s ___ Interrupted 51 Greek philosophical type 53 Brit. word ref 55 Coral isle 56 What 20-Across said about 38-Across 61 Kind of hall 62 Shakespeare’s foot 63 Promised to be wife and wife, e.g. 66 Sheltered, at sea 67 Caesar’s “See!” 68 Remove a slip, perhaps 69 Kristy McNichol sitcom Empty ___ 70 Enjoy E. Lynn Harris 71 Like pinker meat
1 Scout promises to be “morally straight” 6 Samoan investigator Margaret 10 Frat hazing sounds 14 Solid gold measure 15 Trucker’s shaft 16 Sex Dr. 17 Oily rock 18 Simba’s Broadway love 19 Start to climax 20 Russian strange bedfellow 23 Colette’s Mrs. DOWN 25 Mamma ___! 1 Brief endorsements 26 Not straight up 2 Postcoital sigh 27 Outed, for example, 3 Walked with the ball, with “on” to Sue Wicks 29 Boas for drag queens, 4 Michael of Six Feet e.g. Under 33 Curve shape 5 Put a head on cap34 Didn’t go straight puccino 36 It may slip over one’s 6 Song from Flashdance head 7 Doctors make you 38 American strange strip for it bedfellow 8 “___ want is a room 41 Rap sheet item somewhere...” 42 Contents of a good 9 What you may call head your life partner 45 It bit Cleopatra 10 Rocket guy Wernher 48 Behind with the von ___ bucks
11 Em, e.g. 12 Top floors 13 Stands out 21 Feeling of contempt 22 Old ___ (Book of Practical Cats name) 23 Where you might see R.E.M. 24 Brother of Curly and Shemp 28 Go down 30 Corydon author Gide 31 “Poppycock!” 32 A Room with a View author 35 Opera tenor Caruso 37 On-line ‘zine 39 Airport in Israel 40 Intense competition at Barneys 43 Sung syllable 44 Like a cunning linguist 45 Disney lyricist Howard 46 Remington ___ 47 Groups of manhunters 49 Moved up and down 52 Atlas blow-up 54 Louganis, for one 57 Opera house level 58 Defensive spray 59 Hit with hand motions 60 Nickelodeon explorer 64 Tongue ending 65 Augsburg article
56 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | HEALTH
positive thoughts
Why are we still not educating kids about HIV? BY DESIREÉ GUERRERO
In 1977,
the year I was born, there wasn’t a name for it yet. Many were still calling it the new “gay cancer” or more officially, GRID (gay-related immune deficiency). Then in 1981, gay community leaders, federal bureaucrats and members of the CDC (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention) met in Washington and proposed to change the name of this viral illness, due to evidence that showed the virus was not gay specific. Of course, what I’m referring to is what we now know as human immunodeficiency virus, or HIV. But back in the 1980s, there was an incredible lack of fact-based information about the virus. In fact, the average person knew pretty much nothing about HIV, other than that a lot of gay men were dying from complications of it (or that’s what the media was telling us anyway.) Over the next decade, I would learn about HIV and AIDS in bits and pieces put forth by popular culture — overhearing television news stories as I played in the living room at my grandparents’ house, or from brief glimpses at my grandma’s tabloids on the kitchen table. “Hollywood Heartthrob Rock Hudson Dies of AIDS,” read one headline, a story which was also in heavy rotation on the evening news. Then there were celebrities who began to advocate for those living with the virus, such as Elizabeth Taylor and Princess Diana. Though many celebs have joined the fight since then, the compassion and support these women publicly displayed was — at a time when stigma and misinformation prevailed — an act of bravery. I remember a media frenzy ensuing over the fact that Diana had shook the hand of a young man in the advanced stages of HIV. And what about at school? Was there any discussion of HIV or AIDS there? In a word: no. But that was the ’80s. Statistically, kids weren’t acquiring HIV, and stigma and fear around the virus were at all-time highs. No one wanted to talk about it publicly for fear someone might think you
“had it.” Perhaps the conversation would expand in the next decade — and fortunately, it did. In 1991, when beloved pro basketball player Magic Johnson went public with his status, the world was stunned. Johnson was the first prominent non-gay figure (and personal hero to many young people) to come forward as HIV-positive, which sparked a new public desire for facts and real information around the condition. Exactly how did one acquire HIV? What treatments were available? How could transmission be prevented? In my high school sex education class, I do remember the health teacher (who was also the surf team coach), awkwardly demonstrating on a banana how to put on a condom — but I don’t remember any mention of HIV or AIDS, which by this time was a full-fledged epidemic. The focus in sex ed was more about how not to get pregnant (which I already was at the time, but that’s another story). One of the first major resources for young people to get information about HIV and AIDS was, oddly enough, MTV. In addition to educational specials about safe sex, the “Music Television” cable channel famously cast Pedro Zamora — an out, HIV-positive activist and educator — in The Real World. Through this new lens of reality TV, we got to know (and love) Zamora intimately, and the charismatic young man quickly became a fan favorite. Together, we collectively mourned his passing at only 22 years old. In his all-toobrief time on this earth, Zamora was able to make a bigger impact on my generation around this issue than anyone had ever done before, simply by bravely and unapologetically living his truth. He was one of us, or what we hoped to be — an intelligent young person with a bright future — and now he was dead. The tragedy of AIDS had finally hit home with our generation. As we moved through the ’90s, the conversation around HIV and AIDS did gain momentum. More people were talking
Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 273 | NOVEMBER 2017
about it, and in less hushed voices. “Supermodel of the World” and drag sensation RuPaul kicked off MAC Cosmetics’ Viva Glam AIDS fundraising campaign. Olympic diver Greg Louganis went public about being poz in an interview with Barbara Walters. It seemed that, as a society, we were progressing toward a future of less stigma and more information about HIV. It was also the Madonna Sex book era. Sexual orientations were being explored in films like Threesome, and gender norms were being questioned. People were talking about bisexuality. Rock musical Rent came out, which touched on all these themes, including HIV. As a generation (especially queer kids), we felt certain we were on the proper path to sexual enlightenment, equality and health. But somehow, as we moved into the new millennium and beyond, we seemed to have veered off our path to this utopian future and gotten lost in the desert. The conversation around HIV seemed to all but disappear from popular culture. There were no more poz reality stars on TV, no more celebrities coming forward with their status, and still no solid HIV educational programs being implemented in schools. Today, we are living in a time where we have once again been shaken by political upheaval — though this time advocates seem better prepared for the fight. We are campaigning again, getting the word out there about things like PrEP (pre-exposure prophylaxis) and U=U (undetectable equals untransmittable). Poz people are courageously coming forward again. We are actively and aggressively fighting stigma. But we still have much to do and plenty of challenges ahead — one of which is reigniting the topic of HIV among the younger generation. In 2015, youths 13–24 years of age accounted for 22 percent of all new HIV diagnoses in the United States (81 percent occurred among gay and bisexual males), according to the CDC. Of the estimated 60,900 youths living with HIV in the United States, 51 percent were unaware of their status — the highest rate of undiagnosed HIV in any age group. With statistics like these can we afford to continue putting HIV youth education on the back burner? Q Desiree Guerrero is the associate editor of Plus magazine. This column is a project of Plus, Positively Aware, POZ, TheBody.com and Q Syndicate, and QSaltLake.
NOVEMBER 2017 | ISSUE 273 | Qsaltlake.com
book review
Mask of Shadows BY LINSEY MILLER 2017, SOURCEBOOKS, $17.99, 352 PP
Your someday-dream job is not for wimps. That’s truth: it’ll be real work, and you’re prepared. You know it’ll take training, which will take time. You’ll have to learn to think differently, and that’s okay. You might get discouraged, and you’ll handle it. But — as in the new novel Mask of Shadows by Linsey Miller — are you ready to die for it? At first, Sallot Leon thought the scrap of paper might be money. Erland nobles had been doing that — making money — ever since the war, when Nacea was obliterated. But no, this bit of paper was worth more than money: it was an open call for a replacement member of the Queen’s Left Hand, an elite group of assassin-guards. Come by invitation or by skill, the poster said. Sal had the skill, for sure. Since Sal was eight years old, they worked as a street fighter and could climb anything. There was nothing they couldn’t steal, no lock they couldn’t pick. Those were skills the Queen needed, just as much as Sal needed to be Opal for the Left Hand and so, to get into the audition, they committed their first murder. That, as it turned out, was the easy part: after passing the first interview, Sal was accepted and given a mask to wear at all times, the last mask awarded. Twenty-Three people were in the competition, for which the rules were
simple: kill your competitors without being seen or getting caught, but don’t hurt anyone not competing. Nine competitors were killed the first night. As other Opal Wanna-Be’s fell almost hourly, Sal had to rely on past experience and new skills to stay alive. Corestrength training helped them dodge spears and arrows from other competitors. Tutoring eliminated illiteracy. Medical training kept Sal from death by poisoning. But there was no way to avoid falling in love with someone forbidden, nor the aftermath that was sure to come… Though it starts out a little on the clunky side and it may take a minute to get your bearings, “Mask of Shadows” quickly becomes a pretty good novel. And a unique one, too: it’s rare to find a gender-fluid character in a main position, but that’s where author Linsey Miller places hers — and yet, though unusual, fluidity isn’t the driving force behind this story. We don’t know, in fact, that Sal doesn’t gender-identify until later in the novel. That’s uncommon, too. As for character development, there’s where Miller shines. Sal starts out a bit feral, a street-wise petty thief, uncivilized but with hungry focus. There’s a lot of selfishness in that early Sal, but as they mature into a trained assassin, egotism is replaced by allegiance and a much finer character. Add in a cast that could, one-by-one, die at any minute and, well, you’ll be hooked. For fans of The Hunger Games-type fiction, that’s gonna be too appealing to pass up. It’s gonna be too delicious to deny yourself. “Mask of Shadows,” for readers age 15 and up, is gonna be a dream book. Q
BOOKS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 57
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58 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | SPORTS
Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 273 | NOVEMBER 2017
the outfield
‘Jocks’, yesterday and today
Eric
BY DAN WOOG
“Gumby” Anderson was a high school cross-country coach. Near the end of school, one of his runners was beaten by three classmates — one of them a football player. Calling the runner a “faggot,” they fractured his jaw and damaged his eardrum. It was not the first incident involving a member of the Huntington Beach High School cross-country team. It had been happening ever since Anderson came out as gay. The coach’s announcement — earth-shaking at the time — occurred in 1993. The vicious beating took place three years later. The incident framed the first story in the book Jocks: True Stories of America’s Gay Male Athletes. It was published in 1998. I wrote that book. Nearly 20 years ago, it was as groundbreaking as Anderson’s announcement had been. It was the first book-length compilation of the experiences of gay male athletes — the first time, really, that there was a public acknowledgment that such people existed. Gay athletes had been around forever, of course. Ancient Greek men, I noted in the introduction, had used sports as an opportunity to meet boys. (The root word for “gymnasium” — “gymnos” — has nothing to do with athletics. It means “nude.”) Football players Dave Kopay and Jerry Smith, baseball outfielder Glenn Burke, and diving champion Greg Louganis had all come out of the closet already — though not always of their own volition. Only two male athletes, however, had done so during their active careers: figure skating star Rudy Galindo and soccer player Justin Fashanu. The 1990s were still a fearful time to be a gay athlete. Yet something else was stirring. Across America — in rural towns, faceless suburbs and large cities — teenagers and 20-something gay males were shooting hoops, kicking soccer balls, handling
hockey sticks, running, swimming and biking. They were working hard, and working out. Every day they sweated, trained, competed — and showered — in the most macho of all environments: high school and college sports. They were nowhere near as visible as their classmates who were gay actors, musicians or even student government leaders. They heard slurs from teammates and coaches. They listened quietly as their teammates rated (and often denigrated) girls; detailed their sexual conquests, and passed along the still-accepted sports culture that exalted “manliness” (heterosexuality) and despised “femininity” (homosexuality). But those gay athletes were there. They were finding themselves, finding their places on their teams, finding their places in society. And finding each other. That was the landscape I set out to explore, two decades ago. “Jocks” was filled with stories of the boys and young men who — unnoticed, but in ever-increasing numbers — were changing both the sports landscape, and the way all Americans looked at the image of “gay men.” Many of the stories involved sports like track, tennis and swimming. It was a lot easier then to come out as an “individual” athlete than a “team” player. Something about training on one’s own — and not having to worry about the detrimental effect on closely bonded teammates — seemed to draw gay athletes to solo sports. Some of the tales were tough ones. The stress of hiding one’s sexuality led to drug and alcohol abuse, or thoughts of suicide (as had been true for years with gay non-athletes too). An interviewee described the anguish of being the boyfriend of a Division I basketball player: After games, the athlete went to parties and showed off his “masculinity” by picking up girls, while the boyfriend sat home alone. An Ivy League runner talked about track as a metaphor for not being out: His
life was going around in circles. But many of the stories were positive. When a football coach’s son — who played for him — came out, the man’s world changed. He realized the impact he could have on every player. By being more open about all kinds of differences, he became a better coach. A wrestler mentored younger boys, helping them gain both physical and emotional strength. And two straight athletes spoke up when gay kids in their school were bullied. People respect us for no reason other than we were born a certain way — with the gift of athletics, they said. Well, they added, we’ve all got to respect everyone else too, no matter how they were born. Four years after Jocks, I wrote a sequel: Jocks 2: Coming Out to Play. By then the stories were far more positive, and wide-ranging. The ripples of young athletes coming out had already begun to spread. In 2017, it’s difficult to imagine a time when “gay male athlete” seemed almost an oxymoron. It’s almost as if that was a different century entirely. Q Dan Woog is a journalist, educator, soccer coach and gay activist. His latest book is “We Kick Balls: True Stories from the Youth Soccer Wars.” He can be reached care of this publication or at OutField@qsyndicate.com.
A&E | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 59
NOVEMBER 2017 | ISSUE 273 | Qsaltlake.com
the yodeler
Battle of the Lippy Parallel
There’s
BY RYAN HAYMORE
an unspoken battle that wages on hushed lips. At times, a kiss can seem like an inevitability of the situation. During those picturesque moments the situation’s pinnacle is met with a rush of the heart, a flush of blood to the face, and an angst-filled urgency in the extremities. That moment seems to behest your bodies to indulge in that intimate moment where lips fall against each other in a screaming union of flesh and carnal lust; yes, that’s how this southerner describes a kiss. However, most kisses are just glorified pecks on the cheek. A bad kiss is an inescapable plague in the mortal probation of dating and courtship. A bad kiss mostly feels like you are baptizing your lips in the other’s mouth, having Hannibal Lecter attempt to nibble your face off, or having slugs race across your face. However, the lurking beast I’m talking about is a more covert bad kiss between two good kissers. I coin this a Battle of the Lippy Parallel. The 49th Parallel is the border between North and South Korea. This is where I begin to lace together my southern language of analogy. Let’s say you and the person you’re with are preparing to take the nose dive into each other’s faces and play the Game of Mouths. At this point, your lips approach each other and your puckered pair meets the other. You start the process of arranging noses, lips and
chins. This process, which is a little less than a country line dance of the face, precedes but doesn’t yet indicate a good or a bad kiss. The moment after arranging faces is where the Battle of the Lippy Parallel can occur. Let’s say you’re both good kissers; that is the normal catalyst for the battle. You would naturally think two good kissers can make a magical kiss without much trouble. Well, that is normally the case, but what happens when you both aim for the same lip? The battle breaks out in clear and present saliva! This is the lurking demon in the world of kiss and tell, aka The Battle of the Lippy Parallel. The lip which you prefer to kiss on is the genesis of your physical game. That lip is where you launch sensuality into the spatial, sexual realm. Thus, the lip you kiss is of utmost importance. But what do you do when you realize you both are aiming for the same lip? What happens then is a battle of lip-laced search and seizure proportion. Your mouths are targeting the same space; your chins are nudging each other out of the way; and your hands are whirling all over the place like a frenzied octopus because nothing knows where to go. The pole position is the lip you both want. Eventually, one will get the one they want; let’s face it, there aren’t that many lips to choose from — and, as a gay man, I’m not discussing any other lips. Regardless, this is the battle
which makes a good kiss a bad kiss between two good kissers. The kiss is either an intimate moment or a bloodbath of deranged tonsil hockey. The kiss doesn’t have to be spent entirely in this war pitting face against face for space on one lip. Two options arise: one of you concedes and takes the lip less traveled, or you end the kiss in a saliva-soaked disappointment drenching both your chins. Either scenario ends the kiss rather poorly with someone dissatisfied, or both of you parting ways looking like Pavlov’s dog outside a whistle convention. My solution: If you find yourself in a battle over the lip, then declare a cease fire. Implement a French-style
peace treaty (pun very intended). Bring in the tongue. Be careful though; you don’t want to seem overzealous. You’re only initiating the tongue to overwhelm the system. If you overwhelm the situation with tongue, then you won’t have the room, jaw width, or multi-tasking capacity to focus on any particular lip at all. Believe me, it doesn’t matter whom you’re kissing, nine out of 10 times they’ll reciprocate with tongue or at least enjoy that you did. Thus, a Battle of the Lippy Parallel is quelled and you get to end the kiss with a more positive outlook. After all, it’s our ability to see the world as positive which separates us from the animals. Q
60 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FRIVOLIST
7
Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 273 | NOVEMBER 2017
the frivolist
stylish ways to support disaster relief right now
BY MIKEY ROX
While
the current administration is resting on its racist laurels instead of providing a decent humanitarian response to hurricane-ravaged areas, including the U.S. Virgin Islands and Puerto Rico, there is something _we_ can do to help — and look good doing it. Check out these products to support your fellow Americans — a portion of the proceeds from everything on this list will aid relief in Texas, Florida and beyond — then send a message to ol’ “45” that the world would be better off without him.
1 (code)word ball caps
Local hospitals typically receive the funds raised from (code)word ball caps, emblazoned with a specific area code corresponding to the hospitals that serve those areas, but for a limited time “The Hat That Gives Back” is offering Texas- and Florida-specific designs that individually will supply 21 meals to men, women and children in hurricane-stricken areas. Available in gray and camo, Harvey hats feature “TEX” on the front and “Lonestar” on the back while the Florida version features “FLA” above the bill and “Sunshine” behind. $35, codewordhats. com
2 Waxhead Apparel
Stock up on reef-safe sunscreen and eco-friendly sun shirts (they’re made using the fibers derived from recycled plastic water bottles, but still super comfy!) and Florida-based Waxhead Sun De-
fense will donate 50 percent of October’s online sales to Hurricane Irma victims. $17-$40, gowaxhead.com
A Perfect World 3 InFoundation Texas tote
Inspired by the Texas State bird and flower — mockingbird and blue bonnet, respectively — this limited-edition tote created by founder Manuela Testolini, Mama Earth, J’aime and artist Marley Van Peebles will dedicate 100 percent of its proceeds to provide care packages for hurricane victims. This is the first of a limited series of totes that will raise funds for causes worldwide. $25, iapw.org
ounces and ultra-packable for on-thego adventure. All proceeds will support Harvey victims through a donation to the American Red Cross Foundation. $79, kammok.com
6 Boatsetter rentals
Spend the day living a lifestyle of the rich and famous by renting small fishing boats to luxury yachts from Boatsetter (think of it like the Airbnb of watercrafts) that include captains so you can booze and cruise worry-free. Fifteen percent of your rental will benefit Hurricane Irma victims. boatsetter.com
Page 7 Catherine hope bracelets
4
House of Dad T-shirts
House of Dad will send $5 from every limited edition “Puerto Rico Strong” T-shirt to support hurricane-relief efforts via United for Puerto Rico, plus $2 from any other shirt it offers, including the LGBT-inspired “Proud” line, which will make nice stocking stuffers for your parade-marching family members. $24, houseofdad.com
Choose silver or gold tone designs and stones — like moonstone and white, pink quartz, and aquamarine — in these madeto-order bracelets that represent the best parts of our humanity, from compassion and mercy to tranquility and serenity. One-hundred percent of profits will benefit the Red Cross. $22, catherinepage. myshoptify.com Q
5
Kammock hammock
Mikey Rox is an award-winning journalist and LGBT lifestyle expert whose work has been published in more than 100 outlets across the world. He lives with his dog Jaxon. Connect with Mikey on Twitter @mikeyrox
Your backyard will benefit from a bit of backcountry flair when you install Kammock’s limited edition Wallaby-style Texas flag hammock, weighing just 10
NOVEMBER 2017 | ISSUE 273 | Qsaltlake.com
My point of view BY KED KIRKHAM
I have
long held the idea that one difference between the conservative talking heads and liberal talking heads is that the former want other folks to change their ways, while the latter want to change their own ways, if or when necessary. Now that you know my slant, my point is in response to all the airtime over what professional athletes should and shouldn’t do, vis a vis the national anthem and presenting of the colors. I was a Boy Scout. I was a good Boy Scout, mostly. In Boy Scouts there is a long history of quasi militaristic indoctrination, in the guise, of course of wholesome and patriotic character building. I get that! I believe in it and support it. Scouting does a boy good. As my thinking has evolved, I say scouting would do all
gay writes
young people good, and that we ought to make room for all. What? You are doubting my slant on this? The reason my scouting history comes up is that this was where my education of flag etiquette and proper response to the singing of the national anthem took place. I am sure that there were other lessons, but the formulation was in scouting. You can look it up so easily now, do so. That is not meant to imply I won’t vary my practice from my indoctrination. In that education and training I do not recall ever having learned other stanzas to the national anthem. What I learned and have sung all my life is what we hear at the sports events and community picnics. When I first read reports of the quiet, personal protest of the Star-Spangled Banner I looked the words up, having theretofore no concept that it could be offensive in any way.
And there it was. Now I see. Can you recite the remainder of the song right now? Written as a poem by Francis Scott Key, after the battle for Fort McHenry in the War of 1812, Key took it to a music publisher, who adapted it to the rhythms of another song “To Anacreon in Heaven”, a popular tune Key had already used. More than a century after its first publication, the song was adopted as the American national anthem, first by an executive order from President Woodrow Wilson in 1916 and then by a Congressional resolution in 1931. Maybe as a national anthem, it should remain the one stanza we can all recite. The flag is a symbol of the republic for which it stands. Desecration of the flag, while volatile and offensive is recognized as speech, a protected behavior in the United States. When I make a pledge to defend the flag, I place my hand
A&E | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 61
over my heart. That is what a solemn pledge is. The national anthem is not a pledge, I do not place my hand over my heart except in a pledge. What would you do if I said I did not like the way you expressed your religious tenets, or if I said you are not religious enough, or your religious expressions should not be made in public? If I inserted patriotism in place of religion, would that be better? What if I suggested love, instead of patriotism? I own my patriotism. And my religiosity. And my love. And I will stand up, next to you, to defend them still today, because in fact I love this land, and what its symbols stand for. Rather than seeing these protests as being against the flag, or the national anthem, I see citizens using them — powerfully, symbolically — in protest against the generations-long history of racism and other abuses. Q
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62 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FINAL WORD
Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 273 | NOVEMBER 2017
the perils of petunia pap smear
Tales of the City BY PETUNIA PAP SMEAR
The road
to the City by the Bay is fraught with danger and excitement. (Or, I left my @&#% in San Francisco.) Ever since I was introduced to the magical Tales of the City books by Armistead Maupin, I have been totally enthralled with anything to do with “The Emerald City” capital of all things queer. I often imagine myself as Mrs. Madrigal, the consummate ethereal, mystical, and perfect hostess and friend. Only two weeks ago, Mr. Pap Smear and I were fortunately able to take a vacation to San Francisco. Here was my big chance to explore the “The Golden City” and relive the adventures of Miss MaryAnn Singleton. We decided that having a car in the city could be more of a liability than advantage. For example I could park my car at Fisherman’s Wharf for just $45 a day. What a bargain! So we decided to get a hotel across the bay in El Cerrito, near a BART station and commute into the city like the locals. On Saturday morning we prepared to leave our hotel. Of course I absolutely adore touristy things, and could easily classify myself as an “accidental” tourist. The weather man had predicted an 80-degree temperature, with some breezy wind gusts. I chose my most stiffly-styled beehive wig, and added an extra two cans of Aqua Net for increased structural integrity and, just for insurance, I wrapped
7pm, October 20, Nov. 17 First Baptist Church, 777 S 1300 E fb.me/matronsofmayhem
it up in a festive sequined traveling scarf. I donned one of my most comfortable, yet cool, traveling frocks. You know, one complete with a very busy print just in case some food spillage might occur. Then, of course, I chose to wear sensible shoes. (I have found that as I advance in years, high heels can be absolutely dangerous. The Utah Bears can attest to this as they have witnessed my falling off the stage at Third Friday Bingo on more than one occasion, always landing directly at the feet of the Bears’ table. And always not one of the furry bastards would lift a paw to help me up off the floor.) We got to the BART station on a Saturday morning, thank goodness it was not too busy. It was a huge adventure for a little queen from an Idaho farm town, human population 350 and 5,000 sheep. Once we figured out how to purchase the tickets from a vending machine, no need to interact with a person, and to go through the automatic turnstile, the train thundered into the station and off we went. I tried to occupy my mind by staring at a very cute boy “man spreading” his well muscled thighs, through Spandex cycle shorts, as the train entered the tunnel under the bay, beneath the hundreds of feet of dark, cold, deadly water that could, at any moment, come crashing into the tunnel. I could not help but envision Shelly Winters swimming for her life, attempting to escape from the capsized USS Poseidon. We got to Fisherman’s Wharf, and first things first, we had to have some lunch at the Ferry Building. The roll that encased my sandwich was way too big, so I channeled my bread-tearing abilities from my days as an Aaronic priesthood princess blessing the sacrament and prepared some bite-size pieces for the seagulls on the pier — an Alfred Hitchcock flock soon swarmed me! Beware what appeared to be liquid airborne divinity. We boarded a double-decker bus tour of the city. We of course sat upstairs to
get the best view. We traversed all over the city, seeing many wonderful sights and got sunburned and wind-whipped in the process. Then it was nearing dusk and a huge fog bank was beginning to roll in as the tour bus drove us across the Golden Gate Bridge. Silly me, I did not take a jacket. Senseless me, I did not notice that all of the other passengers had either gotten off the bus or moved into the enclosed warmth of the downstairs. Just then the trade winds blew in off the coast, pushing the moist and frigid fog, plummeting the temperature. The bus increased to highway speed to cross the bridge. The wind velocity was probably somewhere around 50 m.p.h. Being the only people on the top of the bus we were totally exposed to the elements. The near hurricane-force wind grabbed at my jowls which flapped like a drooling Saint Bernard. I suddenly had to pee! It was a textbook example of clenching — very touch and go — until we returned to Fisherman’s Wharf. I had never been more grateful for a restroom and a cup of steaming clam chowder in my life. This story leaves us with several important questions: 1. Should water have flooded the BART tunnel, do you think my breasticles could have performed as flotation devices? 2. Are the blinking lights on my breasticles sufficient to perform as beacons in case of a rescue situation? 3. If I tore french bread into little pieces and sprinkled them on the floor in front of the Bears’ table, do you think they would help me, or would they pull a Seagull move and shit on me? 4. Could Botox have prevented my jowls from flapping in the wind? 5. Is this why we practice Kegel exercises? These and other eternal questions shall be answered in future chapters of the Perils of Petunia Pap Smear. Q
NOVEMBER 2017 | ISSUE 273 | Qsaltlake.com
NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 63
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