QSaltLake Magazine - March 2018 issue

e k a l t l sa

FREE

INE Y MAGAz L L A D N NS A UAL , TRA X E IS B , N AY, LESBIA UTAH’S G

MARCH 2018 VOL. 15 • ISSUE 277 QSALTLAKE.COM

Spring Preview

2 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE BEST

OF STATE 5 YEARS IN A ROW!

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 277 |

MARCH 2018

Come see the difference a little love can make!

• Allergy Testing • End-of-Life Care • Behavioral Medicine • Cat Friendly Vet

• Pain Management • Cancer Treatment • Internet Veterinary Medicine • Behavioral Counseling • Veterinary Diagnostics & Lab

• Wellness Care • Dental Care • Veterinary Surgery • Boarding • Grooming • K-9 Rehabilitation

801-294-5960 • UtahAnimalCare.com • 698 W 500 S, W. Bountiful, UT 84087 1977 W. North Temple, Salt Lake City, UT 84116 2016 & 2017 BEST OF STATE WINNER!

Where dogs come to play!

E arding E R o F One ight of b n e or ith this(1a) dper customer r a c w only, One rt location day mers at airpo ls ta custo nly New Valid o all for de C

Boarding • Daycare • Dog Wash • High Quality Webcams • Pet Shuttle Utah Dog Park Airport Utah Dog Park Woods Cross 801.683.3647

1977 W North Temple, SLC

596 W 1500 S, Woods Cross

UtahDogPark.com

FINAL BUS of the SEASON! Saturday Spectacular Buffet included Free drink coupon, $7 in free play, $5 lucky bucks, bingo, wheel roulette and a raucous group await!

Escape Spring Conference Weekend!

SPRING BUS

Saturday, March 31 Noon–9:30pm

FEATURING THE

Matrons of Mayhem

Tickets at BigGayFunBus.com

4 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE

Qsaltlake.com |

QSaltLake Magazine is seeking a salesperson who is passionate about our products and wants to see them thrive, knows and loves our community, and can tell advertisers why they want to be part of the fun. Print ad sales, online ma marketing, social media marketing and event marketing. Self-starters preferred. Some sales experience, especially advertising sales would be great. Email a cover letter and resume to editor@qsaltlake.com.

Please no calls. Get paid while doing something great for our community. Equal Opportunity.

ISSUE 277 |

MARCH 2018

QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 5

ISSUE 277 | Qsaltlake.com

Cinderella february 9–25 801·869·6900 | balletwest . org

20% off* with promo code:

QCINDERELLA

*plus applicable service charges; offer applies to all available unsold tickets in scales 1–5, and only for the performances listed above; this offer is subject to be changed or withdrawn at any time; does not apply to previously purchased tickets; other restrictions may apply.

principal artists beckanne sisk & chase o’connell | photo by beau pearson

MARCH 2018 |

staffbox

publisher/editor Michael Aaron

ASSISTANT editor Tony Hobday designer Christian Allred sales Craig Ogan, 801-997-9763 x1 sales@qsaltlake.com national advertising representatives: Rivendell Media, 212-2426863 sales@rivendellmedia.com Motivate Media, 858-272-9023 contributors Joshua Adamson Pickett, Diane AndersonMinshall, Chris Azzopardi, Paul Berge, Jeff Berry, Dave Brousseau, Paul Campbell, Tyson Daley, Mikki Enoch, Jack Fertig, Greg Fox, Charles Lynn Frost, Oriol Gutierrez Jr., Ryan Haymore, Tony Hobday, Joshua Jones, Christopher Katis, Rock Magen, Sam Mills, Mikey Rox, Gregg Shapiro, Petunia Pap Smear, Steven Petrow, Ed Sikov, Elaine Stehel, Ben ­Williams, D’Anne ­Witkowski distribution Bradley Jay

Crookston, Randy Bodily publisher

Q Media Group 222 S Main St, Ste 500 (by appt. only), Salt Lake City, Utah 84101 tel: 801-997-9763

CONTACT EMAILS: general: info@qsaltlake.com editorial: editor@qsaltlake.com ARTS: arts@qsaltlake.com sales: sales@qsaltlake.com

Check us out online at:

QSALTLAKE.COM FACEBOOK.COM/QSALTLAKE TWITTER @QSALTLAKE

QSaltLake Magazine is a trademark of Salt Lick Publishing, LLC., Q Media Group

Copyright © 2018, Salt Lick Publishing, LLC. All rights reserved. No material may be reprinted or reproduced without written permission from the publisher. 8–12,000 copies are distributed free of charge at over 300 locations across the state. Free copies are limited to one per person. For additional copies, call 801-9979763. It is a crime to dispose of current issues or otherwise interfere with the distribution of this magazine. Printed in the USA on recycled paper. Please recycle this copy when done.

MARCH 2018 |

ISSUE 277 | Qsaltlake.com

QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 7

from the publisher Men’s Health Seminar

I have a dream that we will all act

BY MICHAEL AARON

It is gut-

wrenching to watch video and read stories of families being ripped apart as one or more members is snatched from their homes or workplaces and sent away — in our name.

Yes, these are representatives of US doing this. We might as well be there holding the weeping family from giving their loved one a last hug.

This is even more unforgivable when it comes to DACA recipients — those given a promise by US that we will find a way for them to stay in the only home they’ve known.

Congress must pass the Dream Act. So much is at stake for undocumented young people.

In September, Donald Trump said he would cancel the Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals program unless Congress passes the Dream Act. President Obama created DACA, which has helped thousands of LGBTQ undocumented young people to work, study, and improve their lives in this country without the fear of deportation. Many of them come from Asian counties.

An estimated 267,000 undocumented immigrants are LGBTQ. Trump’s cancellation of DACA will subject 800,000 potential beneficiaries to again live in fear of deportation. For

LGBTQ people, the stakes are even higher unless Congress passes the Dream Act. Thousands of LGBTQ young people could be deported. Many of them to countries where they cannot live their full and authentic LGBTQ lives.

Many countries prohibit same-sex relations. In Indonesia, police shaved the heads of trans women and publicly caned a gay couple for having consensual sex. In most Asian and Oceania countries, transgender people cannot legally change their gender markers on their IDs, and LGBTQ people are not protected by anti-discrimination laws.

A broad coalition of civil rights groups, businesses, educational institutions and religious communities support the Dream Act. The National Queer Asian Pacific Islander Alliance has been pushing for a clean Dream Act with no enforcement provisions, mobilizing 10,0000 postcards, phone calls, and emails to senators and representatives.

Congress needs to hear from US now more than ever.

Send an email to Congress to support a clean Dream Act. Call House Speaker Paul Ryan and Senate Majority Leader McConnell at 202-225-3121 and demand that they support LGBTQ undocumented youth by passing a clean Dream Act. Q

LIFE IS FOR LIVING LEARN ABOUT ERECTILE DYSFUN CTION CAUSES AND TREATM EN TS Take the first step on dealing with erectile dysfunction. Join us for a free health seminar focusing on gay men’s health and wellness topics. James Hotaling, MD, will discuss the latest treatment options for erectile dysfunction. If ED is a concern for you, we encourage you to attend and learn more — no matter what your sexual orientation or gender identity. A question and answer session will follow the presentation.

2.26.2018 Monday | 6:30 PM | Check-in 6 PM School of Dentistry Auditorium 530 Wakara Way, Salt Lake City, UT 84108 RSVP BY MONDAY, 2.19.2018 877.433.2873 OR UOFUHEALTH.ORG/MEN

8 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

news The top national and world news you should know from last month LGBT acceptance down, homicides up Two studies show negative trends in approval of the queer and hate crimes against LGBT individuals. A new Harris Poll for GLAAD unveiled at the World Economic Forum in Davos, Switzerland revealed a drop in overall acceptance in the U.S. dropped from 53 to 49 percent. The study showed an 11 percent increase in the number of LGBT people who say they’ve experienced discrimination for their sexuality or gender identity. The National Coalition of Anti-Violence Programs recorded 52 LGBT hate-based homicides in 2017, up from 28 single-incident anti-LGBT killings in 2016.

All states reported increases in anti-LGBT crime, more than half of the homicides occurred in Florida, Georgia, New York, Louisiana, and Texas, according to the report.

Forty-five percent of the murders of men were related to violence related to hookups from ads placed on personal websites and apps.

Alabama (again) on marriage license The Alabama Senate passed a bill that would eliminate marriage licenses in the state.

People would instead go to a probate judge to merely get their marriages recorded

Qsaltlake.com |

by a state official. Instead of obtaining a marriage license, couples would show affidavits that they are of legal age, not already married and not related by blood or adoption.

Legislation author, Republican State Sen. Greg Albritton, said the state needed to get used to the fact that gay marriage is now legal and adjust accordingly. “It keeps the state from deciding who can and cannot get married,” he said and would make it easier for probate judges who feel morally conflicted. Eight counties in the state have not issued any marriage licenses since the 2015 U.S. Supreme Court ruling declaring same-sex marriage a constitutional right.

Mean tweets block gay man as US ambassador to Germany Senate Foreign Relations Committee has narrowly approved LGBT activist and political advisor to Senator John McCain and Mitt Romney’s presidential campaigns, Richard Grenell, as the Ambassador to Germany. A vote on the Senate floor is being held up as part of a “slow walking” process employed by Senate Democrats for all Political/Diplomatic posts. Under the notion that truth hurts, Sen. Christopher S. Murphy (D.-Conn.) objected to Grenell’s “mean Tweets”, among others, Grenell tweeted that ambassador to the Vatican Callista Gingrich “snaps on her hair,” and Hillary Clinton is “transforming into Madeline Albright.”

Judge ruling: not just a piece of cake A California judge denied an injunction sought by the state’s Department of Fair Housing in another wedding-cake case ruling artistic expression and religious freedom give a baker the

right to refuse service. Mireya and Eileen Rodriguez-Del Rio sued Tastries Bakery located in Bakersfield for the owner’s refusal to bake them a wedding cake. Superior Court Judge David Lampe said the bakery could continue to refuse to make wedding cakes for same-sex couples, as cakes were a form of “artistic expression” and “expressive conduct” and protected by the First Amendment.

Holy Toledo, bar goes to church One of Ohio’s oldest gay bars, Bretz Nightclub, in Toledo’s gayborhood of The Village-On-Adams closed and purchased by The Greater Toledo House of Prayer. The GTHP is affiliated with a group whose website states it, “oppose(s) and prohibit(s) living in, practicing, condoning, or supporting sex outside of marriage, adultery, homosexuality, bisexuality, bestiality, incest, gender identity different than the birth sex chromosomal level, pornography, or other sexual immorality.” A neighborhood association texted that, “The area will remain LGBT affirming, and stressed that it was “heartbroken” at the closing of Bretz.

Calif. modifies HIV transmission law The California legislature updated HIV-related laws to be more in-line with how to treat transmittable conditions.

The state reduced penalties for “intentional exposure” from a felony to a misdemeanor. The change also says an HIV-positive person cannot “expose” a sexual partner if they are virally suppressed, nor transmit the virus if their partner is on PrEP. Legislation supporters see this as a significant step toward treating HIV as a public

ISSUE 277 |

MARCH 2018

health issue, instead of a criminal one saying, “State law will no longer discourage Californians from getting tested for HIV. We are helping to reduce the stigma that keeps some from learning their HIV status and getting into treatment to improve their health, extend their lives, and prevent additional infections.”

‘Queer Eye’ drops ‘Straight Guy’ After Will & Grace’s revival success, Netflix has rebooted Queer Eye for the Straight Guy (re-titled simply Queer Eye).

There was worry the show would seem like nothing has changed since the last show.

But the reboot, starring Bobby Berk, Karamo Brown, Jonathan Van Ness, Antoni Porowski, and Tan France, has won over critics with the show’s “new-found sense of deep empathy. There’s more to the 2018 version than gay-straight dynamics (hence, no ‘for the Straight Guy’ in the title),” said James Poniewozik of the New York Times. One episode is about a gay man, who has always dressed to avoid ‘looking gay’ who wants to come out to his family and the Queer Eye guys help look and sound just right.

Colorado may defund Civil Rights Commission The Republican-controlled state legislators have stripped funding from the Colorado Civil Rights Commission. The commission ruled against Masterpiece Cakeshop for refusing to bake a wedding cake for a gay couple. The U.S. Supreme Court is reviewing the ruling.

The legislators say the commission expires in this session and will need to be renewed before funding is approved. Democrat leaders in the legislature and the state’s governor say the move is motivated by the majorities’ anger over the ruling.

MARCH 2018 |

ISSUE 277 | Qsaltlake.com

NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 9

Need a lawyer who understands our community?

Call Chris Wharton Law Olympians Gus Kenworthy and Adam Rippon share a kiss at the Pyeonchenge WinPHOTO: TWITTER ter Olympics opening ceremony

Olympic athletes join North Korea, snub VP U.S. Olympic figure skater Adam Rippon turned down a request from Vice President Mike Pence to talk after Rippon denounced the Veep’s role in leading the U.S. delegation to Pyeongchang.

Rippon said he believed Pence holds homophobic opinions, objected to Pence’s previous positions on conversion therapy and HIV funding and, for good measure, Pence’s support for the president. Rippon said he might speak to Pence if he felt there was a way to have “an open conversation.” U.S. Olympic skier, Gus Kenworthy, had much the same criticism but not as good of press agentry.

A Pence spokesperson responded to Rippon, saying, “The vice president is proud to lead the U.S. delegation to the Olympics and support

America’s incredible athletes.

Despite these misinformed claims, the vice president will be enthusiastically supporting all the U.S. athletes competing in Pyeongchang.”

Homoerotic Olympics The Pyeongchang Winter Olympics opening ceremonies saw some homoerotic action. U.S. Olympians Adam Rippon and Gus Kenworthy hugged and kissed on the parade. Kenworthy tweeted during the show, “We’re here.

We’re queer. Get used to it.” Show-stopping Tongan athlete Pita Taufatofua, who’s naked oiled, muscled torso lit up the most recent Summer Games opening, returned to the Winter Olympics as his country’s flag-bearer in the opening ceremonies. The cross-country skier repeated his stripped-and-oiled-flag routine. Q

• Divorce and Custody • Name and Gender Changes • Adoption and Surrogacy • Criminal Defense • Wills and Trusts Chris is a leading advocate for individuals and families in our community

Christopher Wharton

A  L

Voted “Best Lawyer” by QSaltLake Readers

Chris Wharton Law, LLC

165 S Main Street, Suite 200

Salt Lake City, Utah 84111 chriswhartonlaw.com

10 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 277 |

MARCH 2018

Surrogacy, hate crime bills appear dead Two LGBT-related bills, one bad/ one good, appear to be dead at the 2018 Utah Legislative Session.

S.B. 126 GESTATIONAL AGREEMENTS REVISIONS Senator Lyle Hillyard presented S.B. 126 to the committee on Feb. 7; the bill repeals legal protections for surrogacy participants. Hillyard says he’s rescinding the bill — he had sponsored in 2005 — because he promised lawmakers to keep the legislation within traditional marriages. “Gay marriage was not an issue when the law was passed,” Sen. Hillyard said.

Hillyard’s bill comes on the heels of a case currently before the Utah Supreme Court. The facts of the case stem from a Washington County judge denying a Southern Utah gay couple a surrogacy agreement in 2016. The couple is testing the requirement for ‘mothers’ to prove they are medically unable to bear a child.

The couple’s lawyers argue that this discriminates against couples where neither member is female, which “violates the due process and equal protection clauses of the U.S. Constitution, as well as the uniform operation of law clause in the Utah Constitution,” according to court papers.

Many surrogacy advocates attended the bill’s hearing in the Senate Health and Human Services Committee. All the speakers except Hillyard want the current legislation to remain, and many wanted to see it be amended to be more inclusive.

Abby Cox, who acted as a surrogate for her sister-in-law, told the committee, “Families have gone through more than we can imagine getting to the point of contemplating surrogacy. To not allow them that protection, to be able to have that going forward, I think would be a huge mistake.”

In a striking turn of events, Hillyard withdrew the bill on Friday, Feb. 9, which essentially means it is dead.

“Together, we were able to prevent Senator Hillyard’s harmful surrogacy bill from moving out of committee,” said Troy Williams, executive director of Equality Utah. “Hillyard was the author of Utah’s original surrogacy statute.

He confessed that he never imagined that it might one day be used to benefit same-sex couples. His bill would have repealed essential legal protections for

both straight and gay parents. Thankfully, saner heads prevailed.”

“The committee room was packed to overflowing for emotionally moving testimony. Several parents with bouncy babies and beautiful family photos shared the joy that surrogates provided their families,” Williams reflected. “They discussed the importance of gestation agreements to protect the rights of both intended parents, surrogates and their children. It took incredible courage to share personal hardships in a public forum, and they inspired us all.”

S.B. 86 VICTIM TARGETING PENALTY ENHANCEMENTS Bryan Schott, the managing editor at UtahPolicy.com, posted to the site Feb. 8: “Senate President Wayne Niederhauser says a bill to provide enhanced penalties for crimes that target people because of their sexual orientation or personal characteristics is dead for the 2018 session.

“It just doesn’t have enough support,” said Niederhauser when asked why SB86 has been sitting in the Senate Judiciary, Law Enforcement, and Criminal Justice Committee since the opening day of the 2018 session.

Sen. Daniel Thatcher, R-West Valley City, says his bill allows for enhancement of a criminal penalty for those already convicted of a crime if it can be proven that the perpetrator targeted the victim because of a laundry list of factors, including gender, ethnicity, disability, the

victim’s ancestry or sexual orientation.

The bill was a long shot coming into the 2018 session. Thatcher pushed the same bill last year with no success as he was unable to get it out of the Senate Rules Committee. This year it went one step further, being assigned to a standing committee. However, UtahPolicy.com is told that the bill will not be put on an agenda for a hearing this year, meaning it’s as good as dead.

Thatcher was able to rally support for the bill from many cities and counties who expressed support for his legislation.

Additionally, nearly every faith-based community in Utah signed on to back the bill, except for the LDS Church.

Thatcher acknowledges the prognosis for his bill is bleak, but he says he’ll keep pushing.

“It’s one thing to have your colleagues tell you they would give you their vote.

It’s another to actually get the 16 votes you need to pass it out of the Senate,” he said. “I’ll keep pushing to get those votes.

It’s a longshot, but we still have about a month left in the session.” Q

Ogden Pride, OUTreach Utah announce merger Ogden Pride Inc. and OUTreach Utah announced their merger at a launch party Feb. 16.

Ogden Pride expands its mission and vision with the merger, with new programs and partnerships announced at the Launch Party.

Programs previously administered by OUTreach Utah will now find a home under the Ogden Pride Inc. umbrella of services, events, and celebrations of LGBT people in Northern Utah.

Since its beginning in 2005, OUTreach Utah focuses on helping youth. Its social support groups offer a safe place for youth to develop friendships, increase their self-efficacy and provide them with

knowledge and skills needed to become self-sufficient, healthy LGBT and allied adults. Outreach also offers ally and advocate training to groups that work with and support youth.

Ogden Pride Inc. formed in 2014 with its prime focus on organizing an annual event to celebrate LGBT and other queer people living in Northern Utah. Since then, the Ogden Pride Festival has been held on the first Saturday of August and has grown in attendance and offerings each year. This year’s Ogden Pride Festival will be held at the Ogden Amphitheater on Saturday, Aug. 4. Q For further information, please contact Ogden Pride President Tim Sharp at 385-205-9986 or tim.sharp@ ogdenpride.org.

MARCH 2018 |

NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 11

ISSUE 277 | Qsaltlake.com

Senate committee gives Prop 8 lawyer nod for Utah district judge In February the Senate Judiciary Committee approved four more of President Trump’s federal court nominees, including Prop 8 proponent Howard Nielson Jr., from Provo, who was an attorney that helped secure the 2008 California same-sex marriage ban. At the time Nielson had questioned whether the judge in the case should recuse himself because he was a gay man, and would have an interest in the outcome.

Nielson’s Senate confirmation hearing to the U.S. District Court for the District of Utah received both criticism and praise.

Vanita Gupta, president of The Leadership Conference on Civil and Human Rights, pointed out in a letter opposing his nomination to the federal judiciary, that Nielson apparently still holds the same conspiratorial views as he did during his Prop 8 days.

“In 2015, Mr. Nielson wrote an amicus brief in the landmark Supreme Court case Obergefell v. Hodges in which he argued against marriage equality,” Gupta wrote. “In his brief, Mr. Nielson made the insulting insinuation that same-sex couples were not capable of being capable parents, writing that ‘through the institution of marriage, societies seek to increase the likelihood that children will be born and raised in stable and enduring family units by both the mothers and the fathers who brought them into this world.’ He also wrote that “it is plainly reasonable for a State to maintain a unique institution to address the unique societal risks and benefits that arise from the unique procreative potential of sexual relationships between men

and women.’ Fortunately, the Supreme Court rejected his arguments.”

Several other Democrats on the committee protested Nielson’s nomination, including California Sen. Dianne Feinstein who raised issues over Nielson’s role when he worked at the Justice Department before entering private practice. He was deputy assistant general at the Office of Legal Counsel for the Justice Department and participated in the review of two torture memos in 2004 and 2006.

According to the Washington Times, during his confirmation hearing, he refused to answer one of her questions about his position on the memo due to attorney-client privilege.

The Times also reported that Utah Sen. Mike Lee said Feinstein’s assertions about Nielson’s involvement with drafting the memos is “manifestly contrary to fact” and that he worked to rescind one of them.

“I don’t know how you get from there to somehow suggest that he supports this,” Lee said.

Additionally, Sen. Orrin Hatch defended Nielson’s position in the Proposition 8 case, saying he was “zealously” arguing the case for his clients.

“He doesn’t have a bias in his heart. He was part of a legal team that defends the constitutionality of Prop. 8.” said Mr. Hatch. “He should not be condemned for having worked at that level.”

Nielson was confirmed by the Senate Judiciary Committee on a vote of 11-10. Now the full Senate will vote to approve or reject Nielson, perhaps as soon as April. Q

Family, Criminal and LGBT Law A down-to-earth law firm that aims for solutions, not fights.

We help you develop the most cost-effective strategy to meet your goals for your case. Our mission is to give a voice to underrepresented people and to empower our clients through a wide variety of legal services.

Our tool box includes cooperative negotiation and aggressive advocacy, depending on what the situation calls for.

Danielle Hawkes, Esq. The Salt Lake Lawyers

801-590-7555 office 801-243-5669 cell 10 E. Exchange Place, Suite 622 Salt Lake City, UT 84111 danielle@thesaltlakelawyers.com www.thesaltlakelawyers.com ESPAÑOL, PORTUGUÉS

Exam, Bite-wing X-rays and Cleaning.

Good for the entire family.

Not valid with any other offers.

Dr Josef Benzon, DDS Located in Bountiful and Salt Lake City

Salt Lake 2150 S. Main St 104 801-883-9177

Bountiful 425 S. Medical Dr 211 801-397-5220

www.alpenglowdentists.com

To schedule an appointment, please call 801.878.1700 Evening and Saturday Appointments Available Most Insurances Accepted

12 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 277 |

MARCH 2018

Famous LDS ‘gay-straight’ couple Josh and Lolly Weed apologize to the LGBT community as they announce divorce Five years ago Mormon family therapist and blogger Josh Weed, living in Seattle, came out to the world as gay.

But unlike most coming out stories, Josh’s was different, because while he readily admitted that he’s exclusively attracted to men, he’d also been married to a woman for 10 years, and he intended to stay that way.

The short version of his long blog post: Weed knew he was gay from a young age but opted for what he saw as a more righteous path and decided to abstain from romance or sex with men. And, yes, his wife Lolly, whom he’d grown up with, knew all along. He came out to her when he was 16.

“In a moment of honest reflection, I realized that Josh was everything that I wanted in a husband. (All except for the huge fact that he was gay.)” Lolly Weed wrote. “He was dedicated to God above all else and he loved his Savior deeply. He was kind, funny, sincere, honest and so much fun. I connected with him in ways that I did not connect with anyone else. But he was gay. And I did not know if I could handle that in a marriage.”

“I ended up confessing my feelings to him on a random day on a whim. He admitted that he felt the same feelings for me. That I was everything he wanted in a wife,” Lolly continued. “I had never been more excited or confused. We decided to try it out and to start dating. It was truly an amazing experience for both of us, falling in love with our

best friend.”

After this very public coming out went viral and was covered by all of the media, Josh was widely held up by conservatives, homophobes, and Mormons as the perfect example of a gay man. Sure, he was “same-sex attracted” (after all, God doesn’t make mistakes), but he had overcome his burden to happily marry a woman. He even enjoyed the sex, according to one post, though he admitted “enjoyed” might be too strong a word.

The couple did, though, produce a few children.

After 15 years of marriage, however, Josh and Lolly announced in a new blog post that they are getting divorced for three essential reasons: 1) In the past five years they’ve met a lot of gay people and realized that they aren’t (all) deviants and monsters, 2) Josh started to love himself in a way he hadn’t before, and 3) his mom died.

“Seeing the woman who bore me there in that wooden box — feeling and knowing the reality of death and the shortness of life rendered me somehow incapable of telling myself the half-lies required for me to believe that sex with a woman was okay for me,” Josh wrote, “and that allowed me to ignore the ways sex with a woman was hurtful, was dishonoring on an intrinsic level, to the core of who I am.”

He also apologized that his story had been used by the Mormon church and other religious groups to bully and shame other gay people: “We’re sorry for some of the

things we said in our original coming out post in 2012,” he wrote. “There are several ideas in that post that, though well-meaning, we now realize stemmed from internalized homophobia. We’re sorry, so incredibly sorry, for the ways our post has been used to bully others.”

“We’re sorry to any gay Mormon who even had a moment’s pause as they tried to make the breathtakingly difficult decision that I am now making — to love myself fully for exactly what God made me — because of our post,” he wrote. “We’re sorry for any degree that our existence and the publicity of our supposedly successful marriage made you feel ‘less than’ as you made your own terribly difficult choices. And we’re sorry if our story made it easier for people in your life to reject you and your difficult path as being wrong.

If this is you, we want you to know: you were right. You did the correct, brave thing. You are ahead of me in the sense that you have progressed through things I have yet to progress through. You listened to your gut and to God and did a brave, brave thing. Now I’m following your example.”

“We’re sorry to any gay Mormon who received criticism, backlash, or hatred as a result of our story,” the post continued. “It wasn’t long after our post that we began to get messages from the LGBTQIA community, letting us know that their loved ones were using our blog post to pressure them to get married to a person of the opposite

gender — sometimes even disowning them, saying things like, ‘if these two can do it, so can you.’ Our hearts broke as we learned of the ways our story was used a battering ram by fearful, uninformed parents and loved ones, desperate to get their children to act in the ways they thought were best. One person wrote — and I’ll never get the horror of this out of my head for the rest of my life — saying that he went to see his family for Thanksgiving during his second year of college, where he was an out gay man who openly had a boyfriend. When he got home, his father pulled up our story on the computer and then physically assaulted him, beating him as he had often done during his childhood, saying ‘if this guy could avoid being a faggot, so could you!’”

Josh does say he will not leave the Mormon church.

While he now acknowledges that a platonic love, no matter how wonderful, just isn’t a proxy for romance, he’s still committed to his faith. Q

MARCH 2018 |

ISSUE 277 | Qsaltlake.com

NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 13

‘Traditional marriage’ supporter resigns seat from Utah House A married “traditional marriage” supporting Republican politician who voted for stricter laws against prostitution has resigned amid allegations he twice met an escort for sex.

Rep. Jon E Stanard, R-St. George, a father of three, campaigned for “conservative family Former Utah Rep. values” Jon E. Stanard and “traditional marriage” but is now reported to have paid a woman known professionally as Brie Taylor for sex during two business trips to Salt Lake City last year.

The conservative lawmaker was elected to the Utah House of Representatives in 2012 and has three children with his wife LeeAnne.

Last year 43-year-old Stanard voted in favor of stricter laws on prostitution, including increasing the penalty for soliciting sex to $2,500.

On his website, which has been taken down, he stated: “I am a strong advocate for conservative family values.

I am pro-life, as well as for traditional marriage.”

But text messages appeared to show that he met Taylor, 39, in Salt Lake City twice last year, after seeing her advertisement online.

The number the texts were sent from matched Stanard’s public profile on the Utah House website, which has now been removed.

Taylor claimed he paid her $250 for each of the one-hour sessions in June and August during which she says she performed oral sex on him and they had intercourse.

Republican Speaker of the House Greg Hughes released a statement announcing Mr Stanard’s resignation citing “personal and family concerns”.

Stanard’s attorney Walter Bugden said, “Given the current climate in this country with misconduct allegations and the way things are happening in the media right now, there isn’t any explanation that my client could give that would overcome the shadow of these allegations.

The House is now investigating claims Stanard used a state-issued mobile phone and hotel room paid for with taxpayer money.

House chief of staff Greg Hartley told the Associated Press that Stanard was reimbursed for hotel stays in Salt Lake City in June and August 2017 when he was attending legislative meetings at the state Capitol, four hours from his home.

“It looks like they were legislative days,” Hughes said, adding he did not yet know if the House would ask Stanard to return the hotel reimbursements.

“If there has been an abuse of public funds or if public funds were used in a way that’s inappropriate, we would,” he said. “I don’t have solid answers for those things.

I would need to have a way that I would know conclusively that that is the case.”

Stanard also supported a bill declaring pornography as a public health crisis. Q

Our 30th year of making customers happy!

GREEN

14 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 277 |

MARCH 2018

Salt Lake Two-Spirit dance couple to speak at HRC youth conference A Salt Lake City couple who were allowed to dance in a powwow “Sweetheart Special” couples dance, but were disqualified for not being a male-female couple, have been invited to speak at the Human Rights Campaign’s Time to Thrive conference to be held in Orlando, Florida.

Adrian “AD” Matthias Stevens, who is San Carlos Apache, Northern Ute, and Shoshone Bannock, was raised in Fort Duchesne, Utah on the Uintah and Ouray Indian Reservation. His fiance, Sean Snyder, is Navajo and Southern Ute, from Iowa City, Iowa. They currently live in Salt Lake City and refer to themselves as a Two-Spirit couple, having been together for five years.

Their story spread across the nation when a video of them dancing in the competition went viral. People Magazine featured them in December in a story titled, Same-Sex Native American Couple Hopes to Break Barriers Through Dance.

“There are quite a few Two-Spirit couples, but there’s a generational gap, and there’s a variation about how they present themselves and want to be represented,” Stevens told People. “For us, being that younger generation and the next generation, we have a duty — and with a high suicide rate among Native American youth — a lot of those suicides are related to them being members of the LGBT community.”

The annual HRC conference is in cooperation with the National Education Association and the American Counseling Association “to promote safety, inclusion, and well-being for LGBT youth... everywhere.”

“We are making progress on the road to legal equality, yet young LGBT people in America still face dramatically heightened rates of discrimination in school, at home and within their community,” conference organizers wrote in a statement. “The impact of family rejection, bullying and the messages they hear about being LGBT weigh heavily on our youth. By engaging a broad audience of youth-serving professionals, including K-12 educators, mental health providers, pediatricians, religious leaders, recreational athletic coaches and youth development staff (Boys and Girls Club, YMCAs, scout leaders, etc.), we

can create spaces in which LGBT youth are affirmed, supported and have the ability to thrive.”

At the conference, research by HRC and the University of Connecticut will be presented, which shows that only 26 percent of LGBT youth always feel safe in their classrooms.

Only 27 percent feel comfortable talking to their school counselor about questions related to their LGBT identity, according to the study. Merely 10 percent of the youth responded that they hear their family express pride in their LGBT identity.

Stevens and Snyder competed in February in the Seminole Tribal Fair and powwow in Hollywood, Florida.

Bountiful Community Church to host LGBTQ series Bountiful Community Church will host a kick-off talk, Feb. 18, at 11 a.m., on LGBT issues. George and Alyson Deussen will speak during the Sunday worship service about their personal experience of faith and family and how this has led them to become strong advocates for the LGBT community. The BCC’s goal of this initiative is to expand outreach, building a stronger community and interfaith partnerships through this emerging LGBT ministry.

Alyson and George moved to Bountiful in 2008 and have been very active members of the local community. Their involvement with the LGBT community began in 2012 when their son Stockton came out at the age of 13. By Stockton’s side, they have both been strong advocates and allies of the LGBT community, involved with Mormons Building Bridges, Mama Dragons, I’ll Walk With You, Equality Utah and Affirmation. When Stockton died by suicide in 2016, their deep sense of loss reinforced an already

whole-hearted commitment to love without holding back.

The kick-off will include a light lunch and discussion session, led by the Deussens, following the talk.

Then, beginning Feb. 21 and continuing on Wednesdays through March 21, BCC will host a Soup Supper at 6:30 p.m. followed by a viewing and discussion of the docu-drama mini-series When We Rise.

This film series chronicles the personal and political struggles, setbacks, and triumphs of a diverse group of LGBT individuals who helped pioneer the gay civil rights movement in the U.S. from it’s infancy in the 20th century to the successes of today. The cast plays the following activists: Guy Pearce as Cleve Jones; Mary-Louise Parker as Roma Guy, Rachel Griffiths as Parker’s partner, Diane; Michael K. Williams as Ken Jones; and Ivory Aquino as Cecilia Chung.

BCC is located at 150 N. 400 East, Bountiful. For more information call 801295-9439, or visit uccbccchurch.org.

MARCH 2018 |

NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 15

ISSUE 277 | Qsaltlake.com

Author to present dramatic readings based on oral histories of Southern gay, black men A performance by E. Patrick Johnson, Ph.D., entitled, “Pouring Tea: Black Gay Men of the South Tell Their Tales” will take place Feb. 27, 2018, at 7 p.m., at the Westminster College Vieve Gore Concert Hall as part of the 2017–18 Bastian Foundation Diversity Lecture series.

Johnson is the author of two award-winning books, “Appropriating Blackness: Performance and the Politics of Authenticity,” and ”Sweet Tea: Black Gay Men of the South—An Oral History.”

During the event, Johnson will perform a dramatic reading based on oral histories

collected from Black gay men who were born, raised and continue to live in the South.

Johnson is a professor and chair of African American Studies and the Carlos Montezuma Professor of Performance Studies at Northwestern University. A scholar and artist, Johnson performs nationally and internationally and has published widely in the areas of race, gender, sexuality, and performance. Q The event is free and open to the public. For more information, call 801-832-2551.

Salt Lake Arts Council seeks nominations for 2018 Mayor’s Artists Awards The Salt Lake Arts Council is currently seeking nominations for the Mayor’s Artists Awards for 2018. The award is presented by the Mayor’s Office and the Salt Lake City Arts Council and honors the contributions made by individuals and organizations to the cultural life of the Salt Lake City community.

Nominees must be residents of Salt Lake City, work in the city, or demonstrate their contribution to the arts in Salt Lake City. Cash awards of $500 will be presented to each of the winning nominees at the 42nd annual Utah Arts Festival in June.

“The arts are a critical element of our City and help boost our economy,” said Mayor Jackie Biskupski. “Artists add to our creative energy and help us to better relate to each other and the world around us. Salt Lake City has an abundance of talented art-

ists, and we are pleased to recognize their contributions to our community.”

The awards have been handed out since 1992. Past winners include Geri Cordova, Visual Artist award, 2017; Plan-B Theatre Company, service to the arts award, 2015; Pat Bagley, Literary Arts award, 2012; Charles Lynn Frost, Performing Arts award, 2011; and, Fran Pruyn, Performing Arts award, 1993.

Nominations must be received by Friday, March 2, by 5 p.m. More information, a list of previous winners and an online application can be found at saltlakearts. org/2018-mayors-artists-awards/.

Application materials include a one-paragraph statement, a resume or statement about the organization, one or two letters of recommendation and may consist of one or two additional documents. Q

GAY WRITES

A DiverseCity Series writing group A program of Salt Lake Community College’s Community Writing Ctr. The group meets the 2nd and 4th Monday of each month, 6:30-8 pm, Salt Lake City Library Square, 210 E. 400 South, Ste. 8, Salt Lake.

16 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

Qsaltlake.com |

Utah Royals drafts out soccer goalkeeper EJ Proctor Utah Royals Football Club selected Duke University goalkeeper EJ (Emma Jane) Proctor in the fourth round of the National Women’s Soccer League draft.

The Royals is a women’s professional soccer club established by franchise owner Real Salt Lake in December, 2017. This is the team’s first professional season.

Proctor, who chooses not

to label her sexuality and is part of the LGBT community, had a stellar season last year, leading Duke to the national semifinals. She held a shutout all the way into penalty kicks.

According to RSL Soapbox, Proctor is a “standout goalkeeper [who] finished her 2017 senior year with 18 shutouts. Her goals against average was .379, ranking sixth in the nation. Career-wise at

Duke, Proctor owns the alltime record with 35 shutouts, a best goals-against average (0.65), and a single-season record for clean sheets (14).

She was selected for the 2017 All-ACC First Team as well as 2017 United Soccer Coaches Scholar Second Team All-American.”

“I knew I would be relieved to go anywhere, but when I got picked by Utah, I got re-

Know who WANTS your business and will treat you with the

ISSUE 277 |

MARCH 2018

ally excited to be on the first team for their first season — it’s incredible,” Proctor said in a statement. “You always think as a little kid that playing pro is never going to happen, but here it is, and I am so excited.

I can’t wait to see what it’s like.”

Proctor said she received her Duke team’s unanimous support after she told them during a whitewater-rafting trip before the 2015 season, that she was dating a woman, a relationship that started a couple months earlier.

“I was able to come out to a team and a school where it’s not a problem,” Proctor told OutSports. “I felt so lucky to be in that environment, and then, we have this incredible season. Everything that I could have wanted in my life, I had that.”

In 2016, Proctor said she was upset that North Carolina’s governor and legislature stole the chance for her to win a national title in her home state because the NCAA moved its championships out of the state because of HB2, the state’s discriminatory law targeting members of the LGBT community.

“I’m happy that the NCAA is making a stand,” Proctor said at the time. “I knew there was talk, but I was anxious to see if they would follow through.”

“Athletics are the way to make those statements, especially in a place like North Carolina where you have Duke and UNC,” Proctor said.

“We live and breathe basketball here. If you make a stand through something that so many people love and respect, that’s the most that anyone can do.” Q Utah Royals FC is at rsl.com/utahroyalsfc.

MARCH 2018 |

NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 17

ISSUE 277 | Qsaltlake.com

New research on the impacts and implications of ‘no promo homo’ laws GLSEN recently released a research brief on the dangerous effects of “no promo homo” laws in United States public schools. As of January 2018, there are seven states with similar laws: Alabama, Arizona, Louisiana, Mississippi, Oklahoma, South Carolina, and Texas. Utah also had a “no promo homo” law until mid-2017 when it was repealed. However, Utah is included in the brief because the law was in effect during the time the data discussed were collected. The data acquired shows these laws affect almost 10 million public students (including nearly 600 thousand Utah students, before its repeal).

Among these laws, some simply stipulate a restriction of any representation of homosexuality, and some actively stipulate a restriction on positive representations, meaning that one could teach about homosexuality but only in a negative manner.

While these laws do not necessarily preclude educators from portraying transgender people and issues in school, educators who are prohibited from presenting homosexuality in a positive light may believe these prohibitions apply to transgender people and issues as well. Thus, “no promo homo” laws may also stigmatize transgender individuals and restrict transgender MillcreekGardens2018.pdf 1 2/12/2018 2:26:01 PM youth from learning about themselves and their communities in school.

The great brief includes several specific

areas of harm to LGBTQ students, including less access to relevant health resources in schools, students are less likely to report attending schools with supportive anti-bullying policies, and they are less likely to feel supported by the educators in their schools.

The GLSEN brief, in part, concludes with: “The findings from this brief underscore the barriers to developing safe and more affirming educational environments for LGBTQ students who attend school in states that have enacted “no promo homo” laws. However, it is also worth noting that even in these states, where it is conceivable that students would not receive any affirming instruction about LGBTQ people or topics, some students report at least some LGBTQ inclusion in their curriculum and some teachers who found ways to include LGBTQ topics.

Perhaps some teachers simply better understand the specific reach of these laws (e.g., in some cases only applying to sex education), while others are interpreting it more broadly than required. Regardless, it is clear that some educators are finding ways to teach inclusively and support LGBTQ students even in the face of these laws, and future work should explore these strategies in more depth and share them with teachers in similar circumstances.” Q

TAX TIME FEEL SAFE AND CONFIDENT Gay owned and operated.

Filing individual, business, estate and trust returns

accounting services

801-455-6683 – david@digitsas.com

Find an LGBT-friendly dentist or lawyer or funeral home or tax accountant or...

QPages.com

18 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | VIEWS

views

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 277 |

MARCH 2018

quotes “I support gay marriage. I believe they have a right to be as miserable as the rest of us.”

— Author Kinky Friedman

“At some point in our lifetime, gay marriage won’t be an issue, and everyone who stood against this civil right will look as outdated as George Wallace standing on the school steps keeping James Hood from entering the University of Alabama because he was black.”

— George Clooney

“My gay friend just admitted his love for me and he thinks I hate him.

I’m about to show up at his house with flowers, pizza, and video games.”

— Anonymous

“New Rule: Gay marriage won’t lead to dog marriage. It is not a slippery slope to rampant inter-species coupling.

When women got the right to vote, it didn’t lead to hamsters voting. No court has extended the equal protection clause to salmon. And for the record, all marriages are ‘same-sex’ marriages. You get married, and every night, it’s the same sex.”

— Bill Maher

“People against same-sex marriage say it will tear the social fabric of society.

Do you really think gay people would do anything to harm fabric?”

— Tim Gunn

MARCH 2018 |

VIEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 19

ISSUE 277 | Qsaltlake.com

who’s your daddy Of parking spots and kids

BY CHRISTOPHER KATIS

Kelly and

I fight about precisely two topics: parking spots and the kids. That doesn’t diminish the fact that we still argue — rather heatedly too. We curse, we yell, we make ridiculous statements. Just the other night, he demanded to know what it’s like to be perfect, more than Jesus.

But it’s taken us nearly 30 years to get to this point — he would just remain silent and roll his eyes, while I shouted and waved my hands wildly. What can I say?

I’m Greek; we’re a passionate people.

The fact of the matter is that fighting can be healthy for a relationship. According to an article in the Good Men Project, fighting can strengthen relationships by increasing trust, allow for feelings and ideas to be expressed, and reinforce that you are separate individuals. That’s all quite healthy.

I also think it’s important to define what your trigger points are. Not so you can avoid the topic, but so you can understand the underlying reasons it sets you off. Once you know the reasoning, you can discuss the matter calmly, and work through it. And that brings us to kids.

I think the topic of children needs to be discussed thoroughly and often by gay couples because unlike our straight peers, we seldom become parents accidentally.

We also have the burden of a path to parenthood stacked against us. My friend, Dr. Jen O’Ryan of Double Tall Consulting reminded me that the LGBTQ community faces unique challenges when it comes to becoming parents. “Much of our law is based on a heteronormative perspective, which can leave LGBTQ couples stuck in unexpected loopholes. These costly, painful loopholes tend to hit during difficult times,” she advises.

That stress can lead to a lot of arguments, which is why it’s so important to understand where both of you stand on parenting — from the broad view to the minutia. It’s not enough to agree on a theoretical parenting style long before you become dads and leave it at that.

Because in reality, your parenting style has to conform to your child and evolve as s/he grows.

It’s that evolution where Kelly and I struggle — our parenting styles can be very different, which I think is entirely healthy so long as there is some level of synchronicity between the methods. We find ourselves at a point in our experiences as parents where those styles haven’t kept pace with the evolution of our kids.

For example, behavior correction is a lot more challenging now that Gus is a handful of years away from manhood.

So the other day Kelly and I took the dog on a hike and had a long talk about the kids, the stress they can cause us, our reactions to different trigger points, and most importantly the influence our family dynamic has

on us as a couple. Together we worked through some of the challenges we face and came up with some good solutions.

It’s worth it too. I just learned on Jeopardy that parents tend to live longer than childless people. I can only assume that longevity is a vain attempt to stick around long enough to be a burden to the little buggers.

What I see as progress doesn’t mean everything is solved or that we don’t have a lot of work still to do. But it’s the right start. Nor does it mean Kelly and I will stop arguing. It’s an expected aspect of being in a relationship. Plus, the man cannot identify a great parking spot if neon signs were lighting it! Q You can contact Jen O’Ryan on her website, mykidcameout. com

20 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | VIEWS

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 277 |

MARCH 2018

lambda lore

A church was among Utah’s first LGBT organizations

It should

BY BEN WILLIAMS

not be surprising that one of the earliest gay-oriented organizations in Utah was a church. The Metropolitan Community Church, a Protestant Christian Fellowship with outreach to gays and lesbians, was founded by Rev. Troy Perry in Los Angeles in 1968. Perry felt that “God was not against me because I was a homosexual.”

In 1972 a fellowship of that church was established in Bountiful and later in Salt Lake City. Founded by Pastor Robert Buckley, the SLC fellowship of the MCC held its meetings at the First Unitarian Church on 1300 East. The church had a rough start as some of the early misconceptions within the “homosexual community” were that “some people think that there are orgies going on at Metropolitan.”

However, as most gay people were unwelcome in mainstream churches, the church began to grow when other churches turned away its gay members.

At the time it was believed that in some churches they “may welcome a gay person with loving arms, try to help him become straight but then tell him he will go to hell if he retains his lifestyle.”

In January 1973, Salt Lake City’s MCC was officially chartered as a church within the MCC Fellowship. Perry came to Salt Lake City to officiate at the charter presentation. At that time Rev. Richard Groh, a former minister of the Evangelical Free Church, was called as its first pastor and held its meetings at 740 S. 700 East, a building that now houses the first mosque in Salt Lake City.

By April 1973, the MCC of Salt Lake City moved to 870 W. 400 South, the site of the former Grace Methodist Church.

The MCC shared the building with the Westside Community Mental Health Center and Union of the Poor. The congregation was made up of about 50 members, mostly under age 35. Sub for Santa and public speaking engagements had

begun to involve the church in the new gay community. That location much later became home to the Tongan Methodist Church and is now a vacant lot.

Lee Christensen, a temporary leader of the church, told a reporter about the organization of the “Metropolitan.” He said the church was led by “an ordained minister” who “leads the congregation along with five laymen.” “Services are Protestant, with a sermon, prayers, communion, and hymns. Doctrine doesn’t exist in the MCC. But it will have to come.

August 1973 “due to this fractious spirit within the church.”

Christensen was appointed worship coordinator along with a 30-year-old lesbian named Laverl Kay Harris, as his assistant.

A gay man became the new pastor, so Harris and most of the women withdrew from the MCC and founded the Grace Christian Church. Harris became pastor of the splinter church which continued until 1976 when its 35 members began to dwindle.

Of this mass exodus from MCC, Chris-

Rev. Troy Perry, founder of the Metropolitan Community Church, leading a march in 1968

Some people will leave if not developed; others will leave if it is.” The worship coordinator also told the reporter, “I like it left open so that we can draw from a large religious background.”

The infant MCC became embroiled in controversy possibly over this lack of doctrine. As it was the main disagreement between its gay men and women members was over the leadership of the church. Pastor Groh, who led the church at the time of this dispute, resigned in

tensen noted, “Women have virtually disappeared from the congregation. I’m not down on women’s lib per se. I’m for equal rights, but it can go too far. Some of the women in the congregation felt there was a lack of love in the congregation.

Several felt they had it and so they took it with them.”

The University of Utah’s Daily Utah Chronicle featured an article written by Jean Johnson about the MCC on Oct. 30, 1973. The piece was called “Gay Church

MARCH 2018 |

ISSUE 277 | Qsaltlake.com

Welcomes Community Unwanted.” Christensen was the main person interviewed for the article. He told Johnson, “I don’t feel that a particular sexual orientation is a sin. Metropolitan Community Church is for everyone, especially for those who feel they have been discriminated against because of their homosexual orientation.”

Christensen added, “Most of our congregation is fairly well-educated. Many of them do not especially want their employers to know they attended church here. Once they accept their homosexuality, there is no need to run around shouting to the world about it; I’m not sure that our purpose is to help our congregation accept their homosexuality. Our purpose is to make our lives as good as humanly possible. If someone needs help; if someone wants to become straight; I’m all for it. We’re not out for converts to the church. Some of our members are politically active in Gay Liberation groups, but our duty at Metropolitan is to cater to religious needs.”

The Chronicle’s article received both positive and negative response. Clarence Widerberg wrote: “Recently The Utah Daily Chronicle published an excellent article by Jean Johnson concerning the ‘Gay Church.’ In my opinion, the article reflected the heightened social awareness which reporting is capable of and which is necessary for developing a sensitive community. It is interesting to note that Ms. Johnson’s article was rejected by The Salt Lake Tribune because ‘it was offensive to the subscriber.’ Whatever

the jargon for censorship is, it seems to me that Watergate, the Mid East, and advertisements are equally offensive.

Apparently, the Tribune is not willing to recognize the social significance of a gay church, or even willing to recognize it as news.”

Wayne Bateman, on the other hand, took great offense at the article. “If homosexuals of Salt Lake City want to organize a religion, it certainly is their prerogative to do so, but I am appalled that the Daily Utah Chronicle found that to be the most important news Tuesday that related to the University or its students.”

The paper, however, responded to Bateman writing, “We were certainly shocked to find this letter from Mr. Bateman, who as one of the founding members of the Cro-Magnon Journal has always stood against repression of the press. We are sorry if Mr. Bateman is offended by real life, but we feel that the article in question was not only of great interest to the majority of our readers but that it filled a need for information about gays that most members of the university community need and want to understand.

While the MCC and Grace Community Church tried to give a spiritual outlet to men and women in Salt Lake City’s early gay community, the Mormon Church began to mobilize against what they perceived as a wave of wickedness and sin sweeping over the state. On March 8, 1972, the Mormon Church pressured the Idaho State Legislature to repeal its 1971 criminal code revision that decriminalized homosexuality Q.

VIEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 21

First Wednesdays at the Marmalade Branch Salt Lake City Public Library 280 W 500 N Info at bit.ly/UGHS_Lecture Read ‘This Day in Gay Utah History’ at benwilliamsblogger.blogspot.com

“The best advertising I do” —JAY HALLSTROM

pages Get in the 2018 directory of Utah’s LGBT-friendly businesses today by calling 801-997-9763 or emailing sales@qsaltlake.com

22 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | VIEWS

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 277 |

MARCH 2018

creep of the month David Kupelian

BY D’ANNE ­WITKOWSKI

It seems

Travel Out Seattle connects moms with LGBT- and ally-owned attractions, cruises, hotels, tours, events, entertainment, and restaurants in Seattle and throughout the region.

Our mission is to provide families with inclusive, safe, and unique experiences to ensure that every trip is memo a memorable one!

Your Northwest Adventure Begins Here.

like every second there’s a new story about sexual harassment or abuse. The most recent being Larry Nassar, the USA Gymnastics and Michigan State doctor who sexually assaulted over 150 girls and women over two decades. He got a sentence of up to 175 years in prison.

But, by the time this column is published, I’m sure it’ll be eclipsed by another story of sexual abuse and scandal. And we all know who we can blame: the gays.

See, if only we hadn’t let gays start getting married maybe we could’ve prevented much of this wave of sexual harassment, abuse, and assault.

Or so says WorldNetDaily’s vice president David Kupelian.

Kupelian writes that abortion, out-ofwedlock births, casual sex, STDs, and porn “testify to the wholesale abandonment of the Judeo-Christian morality of previous generations. Not to mention the glorification of homosexuality (indeed, its elevation to the status of specially protected class), the redefinition of marriage and the creation of dozens of bizarre new genders that never before existed in all of human history.”

“All of human history” is a little too broad to tackle here, so I’ll just say that I doubt Kupelian has researched gender identity going back that far. I’d also like to speak to the homo Deep State: glory, glory homo-lujah.

“The predictable result of all this wild ‘sexual freedom’?” asks Kupelian. “Confusion, immorality, insecurity, pain, guilt, addiction, mental illness, infidelity, divorce, family breakdown, depression, self-destructive behavior, and suicide.”

In other words, the radical left dared say that sex is normal and we should maybe not criminalize relationships between consenting adults and ended up ruining the world and making Jesus very sad.

Much better, inevitably, to repress and deny all things sexual in the name of “Judeo-Christian morality.”

One of the problems with Kupelian’s argument — and there are many — is that he

claims that “the left” makes no distinction between sex of any kind.

“Leftists have been dreaming, scheming, preaching, protesting, demanding, litigating, and legislating total sexual freedom — complete sexual anarchy, no rules whatsoever — for decades,” he says.

It is not true. But it’s hard for Kupelian, who appears to want iron-fisted sexual repression in the name of his god, to distinguish between two adult dudes kissing on the lips and the molestation of a child. I think he’s the one with the morality problem.

In his column, Kupelian makes the favorite claim of the anti-gay right that “older males” initiate and convert “younger males into homosexuality.” He also claims that “pedophiles see their cause as the next great civil rights movement.”

First of all, you can’t “convert” someone into being gay. That’s not how it works. If anything, the outpouring of women coming forward to speak out against the men who sexually assaulted them only serves to strengthen the argument that sexual orientation isn’t something that changes depending on one’s mood. Otherwise, straight women wouldn’t continue to have sex with straight men in this sexist trash culture.

And unless thousands of pedophiles march on Washington, Kupelian can stuff his “next great civil rights movement” nonsense.

It’s important to note that when Kupelian thinks “pedophiles” he thinks “gays.”

But the majority of pedophiles are men who abuse girls. See, for example, Roy Moore, a pedophile who most Republicans, including Donald Trump, supported because even a pedophile was better than a Democrat.

Sexual abuse and assault thrive in darkness. It is not because gays can get married that Larry Nassar sexually assaulted so many young women. It was because, in large part, of the shame and secrecy that surrounds sex, coupled with the power and influence of an abusive man. The same is true for Harvey Weinstein or Trump.

Kupelian would like to go back to a time when we didn’t talk about this stuff. And wouldn’t you know it — “don’t talk about it” is strikingly similar to what abusers tell their victims. Q D’Anne Witkowski is a poet, writer, and comedian living with her wife and son. She has been writing about LGBT politics for over a decade. She’s on Twitter @MamaDWitkowski.

MARCH 2018 |

VIEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 23

ISSUE 277 | Qsaltlake.com

the yodeler

When will we give ourselves good advice?

She told

BY RYAN HAYMORE

me she ate rock salt at work so that she would start vomiting and sent home.

The moment my friend said this I asked, “why didn’t you just go to the bathroom and pretend to have vomited and just tell them you did? Why eat rock salt and make yourself vomit?” She stared back at me as if I’d discovered something no human would or could ever have.

This friend is the type that could be walking in the desert, fall into a puddle of water, then complain that her shoes and clothes got wet while angrily walking away into the barren heat. She is also the friend that is most likely to get hit by lightning or an asteroid and make contact with an alien race while walking to the store. She’s just wired that way.

I, however, am wired differently. I do things that make no sense to anyone else and give advice that directly contradicts my actions. Then again, aren’t we all that way?

I can give the best relationship advice and am never able to land a third date with anyone. I’ve helped many a friend decide to take the next step, propose, set up a great date, say the perfect thing, etc.

However, when it comes to <em>my</em> dating game, I’m abysmal at giving myself good, working advice. What good advice I give, I retract and replace with negative feedback.

It makes me wonder on the phrase “practice what you preach.” I wonder if not following your own advice is along those lines. However, what if you honestly do your best with relationships but find yourself never successfully having a relationship? What if you give excellent family advice and have a horrid relationship with your family? What if you give the best advice on navigating faith yet find yourself mostly an atheist?

I wonder if we give the best advice on something with which we are unfortunate or never truly succeed in ourselves? Being one of these people, I want to know the central question: is it that I know the insand-outs of that which I give good advice because I’ve tried and been unsuccessful

until now, or am I truly not following my own advice that I easily give to others?

The answer may be neither, either, or a mixture of both, depending on the situation. We advise what we are familiar with; just because some advice didn’t work for me doesn’t mean it won’t work for a friend. Perhaps that’s the key to this puzzle. Perhaps we give advice that we have tried and not succeeded because we saw that it is good advice but didn’t match with our specific circumstances.

Edison took 1000 times to get the lightbulb to work. Maybe if he gave me advice, I would have been successful the 500th time? Maybe that’s how this works? Maybe not. Any advice on how it does? Don’t worry advice-givers, your life may be shit, but so is mine; don’t worry about it. That’s my advice! Q

Everything from Angels to Zen

12896 S Pony Express Rd Suite 200 in Draper (just north of IKEA) 801.333.3777 www.ilovelotus.com

LotusStore

24 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

ANNUAL EVENTS It’s no QSaltLake Fabby Awards event, but the Utah AIDS Foundation’s 28th annual Red Carpet Gala returns (LOL! We love you UAF!). Guests will enjoy live entertainment brought to you by The RCGSE, superb dining by Cosmopolitan Catering and an incredible silent auction. All the while watching the 90th Annual Academy Awards. It is the chance to dust off the tux, slip into your fanciest dress, and join them for a magical evening.

Logan Pride Foundation invites all to their first annual Gayla, held at the beautiful Vineyards at Mount Naomi Farms. The theme is “Over the Rainbow” and will be a night filled with food, music, art, socialization, and fun. Proceeds will go toward Logan Pride’s 2nd Annual LGBTQ+ Youth Prom and other Logan Pride events. The evening is an 18+ formal but with your style and flair!

Those 21 and over can BYOB (Bring Your Own Barbie!).

Tony’s Gay 4 Agenda

BY TONY HOBDAY

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 277 |

MARCH 2018

The UGLCC will “step-up” your business through training, education, and projection that will upswing your profits. This month’s topic is “Social Media Tips and Tricks”, presented by Juliet Dillon-Clark. Enjoy a delicious lunch, along with expert education, and another chance to network with fellow chamber members.

4 29

SUNDAY — FIRST SUNDAY BINGO BRUNCH W/ MATRONS OF MAYHEM

Off Trax Cafe, 259 W. Harvey Milk Blvd., 1 p.m. Bingo cards $5 each

THURSDAY — UGLCC STEP-UP LUNCH ‘N LEARN

SUNDAY — UAF RED CARPET GALA

Sandy Area Chamber of Commerce, 35 E, 9270 South, Sandy, 11:30 a.m.-1 p.m. Tickets $18 Chamber Members/$23 Non-Chamber Members, utahgaylesbianchamber.growthzoneapp.com

The Union Event Center, 235 N. 500 West, 5 p.m. Tickets vary, call UAF at 801-487-2323

SPECIAL ENGAGEMENTS

17

SATURDAY — LOGAN PRIDE FOUNDATION GAYLA: OVER THE RAINBOW

Mt. Naomi Farms, 1285 E. 4500 North, Hyde Park, 6–10 p.m. Tickets $30–45, bit.ly/GaylaRainbow

CONCERTS This March check out great concerts that will have G. Love lasso your giant d***, smothered in special sauce and leaving you in the heights of ecstasy, wailing, “Oh My, Dorothy!”

6 9 20 21

TUESDAY — SHOVELS & ROPE

The State Room, 638 S. State St., 7 p.m. doors open/8 p.m. showtime, ticketfly.com

FRIDAY — THEY MIGHT BE GIANTS

The Depot, 400 W. South Temple, 8 p.m. Tickets $23/adv$25/day of, smithstix.com

TUESDAY — G. LOVE & SPECIAL SAUCE

The State Room, 638 S. State St., 7 p.m. doors open/8 p.m. showtime, through Wednesday, ticketfly.com

WEDNESDAY — OMD

The Complex, 536 W. 100 South, 8 p.m. Tickets $30/adv$35/day of, smithstix.com

DANCE

Please gurl! It’s a tribute to Queen — need more really be said?

Next, the NOH8 campaign returns for an open photo shoot. Pose for an official NOH8 photo by photographer Adam Bouska. Pictures are first-come, first-served. Arrive camera-ready with a plain white shirt to match the NOH8 photos signature style. Funds raised will be used to raise awareness for marriage and human equality, anti-discrimination, and anti-bullying.

Join Mountain West Hard Cider and Red Rock Brewing after the St. Patrick’s Day parade, for live music, food, games, cider, beer, and whiskey. Their Tullamore Dew Party trolley will pick you up at the end of the parade, and drop you off at their gates.

Dress green. Live music by The Dunmore Lasses and John Flanders Trio.

2 3 17

FRIDAY — GARY MULLEN & THE WORKS: “ONE NIGHT OF QUEEN”

Park City Live, 427 Main St., Park City, 7 p.m. doors open/8 p.m. showtime. Tickets $32.50–45, parkcitylive.com. 21+

SATURDAY — NOH8 OPEN PHOTO SHOOT

St. Paul’s Episcopal Church, 261 S. 900 East, 2–4 p.m. Single photos $40, couple/groups$25 per person. Cash, credit card

SATURDAY — 4TH WEST FEST

Mountain West Hard Cider, 425 N. 400 West, 11 a.m. Free, except food and beverages

THEATRE

& AE

Exuberant. Virtuosic. Flawless. Known for their remarkable athleticism and stunning ensemble work, New York-based Parsons Dance delivers positive life-enriching experiences to audiences worldwide. They fuse gestures and movements that comprise contemporary dance with the discipline and precision of a classical company.

SATURDAY — PARSONS DANCE

Val A. Browning Center for the Performing Arts, 1901 University Cir., Ogden, 7:30 p.m. Tickets $7.50-35, sa1.seatadvisor.com

MONTHLY EVENTS

Jesse and Gene are rolling out the red carpet for us to begin celebrating the Academy Awards with Brunch and Bingo. Go flirt with the Matrons while enjoying a fantastic brunch prepared by Jesse, then win fabulous prizes playing bingo with the “Gurls”.

Off Trax opens at 11 a.m. Then saunter over to Club Try-Angles for a cocktail and “Beer Church.”

Westminster College presents a production of the multi-Tony award-winning musical Spring Awakening. A groundbreaking fusion of morality, sexuality and rock ‘n’ roll set in late-19th century Germany. As teenagers are discovering the inner and outer tumult of sexuality in a world where grown-ups hold all of the cards. A musical celebration of youth and rebellion that navigates teen self-discovery in a bildungsroman of anxiety. Mature themes such as sexual abuse, abortion, and suicide; not suitable for children.

1

THURSDAY — SPRING AWAKENING

Courage Theatre, Westminster College, 1700 S. 1300 East, 7:30 p.m., through March 10. Tickets $10, app.arts-people.com

UPCOMING EVENTS

APRIL 11–MAY 6, Hamilton, artsaltlake.org JUNE 16, Kesha and Macklemore, smithstix.com AUG. 9, Jack White, ticketfly.com

MARCH 2018 |

A&E | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 25

ISSUE 277 | Qsaltlake.com

Spring Arts Guide UTAH MUSEUM OF FINE ARTS presents:

Go West! Art of the American Frontier

Now through March 11, umfa.utah.edu/go-west Utah Museum of Fine Arts, UofU

Special art exhibition examines the development and disruption of the American West through more than 80 original artworks

by Euro-American and Plains Indian artists.

These celebrated artworks exemplify how newcomers mythologized their vision of the region and Native peoples sought to preserve their vanishing way of life.

explores where love lies.

PARK CITY INSTITUTE presents:

Trinity Irish Dance Company March 10, tickets.parkcity.institute Eccles Center Theater, Park City

Fusing the vibrancy of traditional Irish dance with contemporary American innovation, Trinity Irish Dance Company performs the dazzling choreography of founder Mark Howard. Dance Magazine calls it “irresistible.” It’s everything you’d expect—but like nothing you can imagine. Dancers propelled by powerful percussive movements and awe-inspiring grace, fly through the air. The New York Times says the result is “impossibly complex.” The time-honored tradition of precision training, meets feet that seem to move at the speed of light.

SALT LAKE ACTING COMPANY presents:

Now through March 11, tickets.saltlakeactingcompany.org Salt Lake Acting Company

Chaos reigns in this comedy about the most dysfunctional family in America. A dishonorably discharged vet returns home to a mother liberated from an oppressive marriage, a sister on “mones” in the process of transitioning, and a father asleep in a clown costume. And nobody is doing the dishes anymore.

PARK CITY INSTITUTE presents:

Mavis Staples

March 3, tickets.parkcity.institute Eccles Center Theater, Park City

Mavis Staples’ performances—from her earliest days singing with her family at Holy Trinity Baptist Church in 1948, to founding the Staple Singers in 1953, to filling stadium shows for decades — run deep with struggle, hope and compassion. Her latest release, If All I Was Was Black, is her third collaboration with songwriter, producer and Wilco frontman Jeff Tweedy. The album’s 10 songs about America today, make it clear that the present is filled with ghosts of the past. Staples

March 21–April 7, grandtheatrecompany.com Grand Theatre, SLCC

Arthur Miller’s dark 1956 drama set on the Brooklyn waterfront tells a story of tragedy, love, and betrayal in an Italian-American immigrant community. A longshoreman by trade, Eddie Carbone is confident of his place in the working-class neighborhood he calls home. That life changes when he agrees to harbor his immigrant cousins. A love affair exposes a dark family secret and suspicion, jealousy and betrayal soon follow in this passionate drama.

EGYPTIAN THEATRE COMPANY AND ZIEGFELD THEATRE present:

Footloose

PYGMALION THEATRE COMPANY presents:

March 22–April 1, egyptiantheatrecompany.com Egyptian Theatre

March 11, artsaltlake.org Leona Wagner Black Box Theatre Rose Wagner Performing Arts Center

A teenage boy moves to a small, backward town in America where dancing is prohibited (cuz it’s sexual deviance!). He encourages his classmates to call for a rock ‘n’ roll prom — to win over a girl, duh!

When PYGs Fly

HIR

GRAND THEATRE COMPANY presents:

A View from the Bridge

Local playwrights will provide a favorite scene from their body of work and explain why it’s their favorite, and the scenes will be read or performed for your pleasure. Several playwrights will be on hand to talk about their experiences as women playwrights and their creative process.

REPERTORY DANCE THEATRE presents:

Dabke

March 16–18, artsaltlake.org Leona Wagner Black Box Theatre Rose Wagner Performing Arts Center

RDT presents this masterful evening-length work by Zvi Gotheiner. Blending Arab pop music and Middle Eastern folk dance, Gotheiner uses the power of dance to highlight tribal and national identities as well as dissolve those definitions.

PIONEER THEATRE COMPANY presents:

In the Heights — Concert Version March 16–17, pioneertheatre.org Pioneer Theatre, UofU

A Tony Award-winner, the story explores three days in the lives of a group New York City Dominican-Americans who live in the barrio called Washington Heights. The show has been heralded “a collective joy,” “exciting choreography” and “an uncalculated charmer.” And PTC is doing concert-style: sung-through, on stage, scripts in hand.

KINGSBURY HALL AND UOFU DEPARTMENT OF THEATRE present:

Manual Cinema: ADA/AVA March 29, kingsburyhall.utah.edu Kingsbury Hall, UofU

Using vintage overhead projectors, multiple screens, puppets, actors, live feed cameras, multi-channel sound design, and a live music ensemble, Manual Cinema creates an immersive visual story right in front of the audience. Favorites at the 2016 Edinburgh Fringe Festival, this incredibly innovative performance collective will perform ADA/AVA, a story about Ada who has been separated from her twin, Ava. When a traveling carnival arrives in town, a visit to the mirror maze opens up a fantastic and supernatural world where Ava can travel between the realms of life and death.

SALT LAKE ACTING COMPANY presents:

Fun Home

April 4–May 13, saltlakeactingcompany.org Salt Lake Acting Company

In three stages of a woman’s life, the show tells a universal detective story about a child’s search to discover what is going on with her parents as they hold up the perfect family facade. Heart-gripping songs about sexual awakening, repressed emotions,

26 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | SPRING ARTS GUIDE

Spring Arts Guide buried secrets, yearning, resentment, love.

Home. Based on a graphic novel, and directed by the superior Jason Bowcutt.

PLAN-B THEATRE COMPANY AND FLYING ­BOBCAT THEATRICAL LABORATORY present:

Jump

April 5–15, artsaltlake.org Studio Theatre

Rose Wagner Performing Arts Center How will you die? Will you see it coming?

What if you’re given a second chance? Jump explores the impact of survival on those we love. Wow! That’s deep, dude.

Qsaltlake.com |

science-infused rock music videos. See why the Smithsonian honored this innovative band with an American Ingenuity Award.

They’ll play some music, break down some of their favorite experiments, and prove that it is possible and fun to set science to music.

BROADWAY AT THE ECCLES presents:

Hamilton

April 11–May 6, artsaltlake.org Delta Performance Hall

George S. and Dolores Doré Eccles Theater Here comes the smash hit story of America’s Founding Father Alexander Hamilton, an immigrant from the West Indies who became George Washington’s right-hand man during the Revolutionary War, and was the new nation’s first Treasury Secretary. Featuring a score that blends hip-hop, jazz, blues, rap, R&B and Broadway, Hamilton is the story of America then, as told by America now.

WASATCH THEATRE COMPANY presents:

What We’re Up Against April 27–May 13, artsaltlake.org Studio Theatre

KINGSBURY HALL presents:

The Singing Bois: A Queerstory of the Boy Band April 6, kingsburyhall.utah.edu Kingsbury Hall, UofU

Part boy band, part Rat Pack, The Singing Bois blend musical precision and sexy swagger, performing original tunes and unique covers from vintage pop genres. A Queerstory of the Boy Band is a fun and playful exploration of gender, race, and sexuality that traces the evolution of the hits of your favorite boy bands, through barbershop, doo-wop, Motown, and more. Packed with tight harmonies and dynamic dance moves, this show tells queer, butch, and transgender stories through song.

PARK CITY INSTITUTE presents:

OK Go

April 7, tickets.parkcity.institute Eccles Center Theater, Park City

Rock band. Physics buffs. Performance artists. You know their videos: The Rube Goldberg contraption set to rock music. OK Go inspire creativity and curiosity with their

Rose Wagner Performing Arts Center WTC presents a black comedy that takes a serious look at the mistreatment of women in male-dominated work environments. This is an effort to insert the regional theatre conversation into the #MeToo and #TimesUp movements. Eliza works at an architecture firm, and she is tired of being slighted, ignored, and patronized because of her sex.

When she takes matters into her own creative hands, her colleagues and supervisors respond in humorously uncomfortable but all-too-familiar ways.

KINGSBURY HALL presents:

Compagnia TPO — Farfalle April 27–28, kingsburyhall.utah.edu Kingsbury Hall, UofU

Two dancers move, play, and paint in the air, telling the story of the slow metamorphosis of the butterfly. TPO’s “theater of the senses” weaves dance, storytelling, and visual experience into a magical hands-on performance like nothing you’ve seen before. The audience is invited to enter the performance and interact with the beautiful, immersive world created on stage.

UTAH MUSEUM OF CONTEMPORARY ART

presents:

Out Loud: an artistic platform for youth voices in the LGBTQIA+ community

Opening Reception May 4, utahmoca.org/out-loud Utah Museum of Contemporary Art

Through explorations in contemporary art and the creation of a museum exhibition

ISSUE 277 |

MARCH 2018

featuring their own artwork, students build their capacity for self-expression and cultivate a sense of agency as important contributors to our society. The program promotes a safer space for interactions with peers, mentors and the greater community, helping students build positive social connections and share their experiences with others.

PIONEER THEATRE COMPANY presents:

Mamma Mia!

May 11–26, pioneertheatre.org Pioneer Theatre, UofU

On the eve of her wedding, a daughter’s quest to discover the identity of her father brings three men from her mother’s past back to the island they last visited 20 years earlier. And it’s all done to the fabulous music of ABBA. GRAND THEATRE COMPANY presents:

Spamalot

May 17–June 9, grandtheatrecompany.com Grand Theatre, SLCC

This musical comedy ‘lovingly ripped off from’ the 1975 film Monty Python and the Holy Grail follows the legendary tale of King Arthur and his knights of the round table on their quest for the Holy Grail. Rude Frenchmen, cancan dancers, the Lady of the Lake and her Laker Girls, killer rabbits, catapulting cows, and the somewhat odd Knights who say ‘ni’ are just part of the adventures and dangers awaiting King Arthur and his knights of the very, very round table in their quest for the Holy Grail.

BALLET WEST presents:

National Geographic Festival May 18–26, balletwest.org Delta Performance Hall

George S. and Dolores Doré Eccles Theater Join Ballet West and four of America’s most esteemed ballet companies over two weekends as they celebrate another season of new works. This festival will focus on the work of women choreographers and women artistic directors from around the world.

Experience this unique event with two different programs, which will feature world premieres by Africa Guzman and Natalie Weir.

EGYPTIAN THEATRE COMPANY presents:

The Full Monty

May 24–June 2, egyptiantheatrecompany.com

Egyptian Theatre Based on the cult hit movie, six men set out to make some quick cash showing off their “real man” bodies by becoming a team of male strippers. (They may not be Magic Mikes, but still sexy!) Q

MARCH 2018 |

SPRING ARTS GUIDE | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 27

ISSUE 277 | Qsaltlake.com

The ‘Straight’ and narrow: groundbreaking LGBT drama to be staged in Salt Lake

BY BLAIR HOWELL

If a straight

person doesn’t have to come out, why does a gay person?

That’s one of the intriguing questions posed in Straight, a regional premiere drama that Utah Repertory Theater Company stages on March 9–25 at the Sorenson Unity Center.

The “potency of sexual labels” is another topic according to Out Magazine, which called Straight a “must-see.” The reviewer said at the hit off-Broadway premiere that “It’s not very often that I leave a theater emotionally raw. Straight is a charged and powerful play.”

Straight is funny, sad, sexy and surprising — and considers the morally complex issue of a generation that prides itself on the pretense of acceptance.

“Straight was an eye-opener to me when it comes to sexuality,” says JC Carter, the director of Utah Rep’s production.

“I admit that I fell into the trap that the lead character Ben describes in the play: that if a guy does something with another guy, he goes over to gay, with everything attached. But that’s not necessarily true.

I was forced to re-think my opinions on sexuality, and if the play can make me do that, I hope it might make others do that, too.”

Utah Rep’s staging of Straight initially caused controversy when rejected for production at Salt Lake City’s Sorenson Unity Center, which prompted a national debate on theater censorship and public offerings at state-owned theaters.

“When a celebrity publicly comes out, many consider it interesting,” Carter says.

“When it’s someone close to you, the response is often ‘Are you sure?’ One of the beautiful messages of this play is that it’s okay not to be sure. As the play points out, we often classify those who come out as ‘brave,’ indicating they’re doing something that’s terrifying. I think maybe being able to understand the nuances of our own sexuality.”

Authored by Scott Elmegreen and Drew Fornarola, the New York Times reviewed the comedy-drama as “Smart,

bracing and brimming with clever wisecracks and thought-provoking observations on sexual identity.”

“Something like Straight would normally never be done in Utah,” says Carter.

“Or it would take years for a theater company would be ‘brave enough’ to produce it. I know the Hale Centre Theatre in Sandy would never touch it. But this isn’t a story that should wait until we’re ‘ready.’”

The acclaimed actors in the three-person Straight are John Valdez as Ben, Andrea Peterson as Emily and Dallon D. Thorup as Chris.

Valdez’s recent credits include Adrian in the Amazon TV series Amarog and fight choreographer for Cobb & Co. Theater’s The Three Musketeers. He has been studying acting in school, on stage and film with the intent of becoming a full-time professional actor. Using a mix of Stanislavski’s system and Strasberg’s method, Valdez brings a grounded realism to each of his characters to portray an accurate and honest human experience. He is a certified stunt professional through the United Stuntmen’s Association and is a second-degree black belt in kung fu.

Peterson recently played the lead role in Utah Rep’s production of The Other Place. She has also worked with Salt Lake

Acting Company on the world premiere of Winter and performed at the Great Salt Lake Fringe Festival in the world premiere of Exposure, another Utah Rep staging. When not wearing the many hats of stage and film, she is producing videos and podcasts for Salt Lake Magazine and teaching film for stage actors at the University of Utah. She recently wrote, directed and edited two short films, Past a Moment and Sisters, and has been nominated for awards for Robyn Cage’s music video “Theatre Noir.”

Straight marks Thorup’s seventh Utah Rep production. Past credits include Footloose (Ren), Sweeney Todd (Beadle Bamford), Utah Rep’s staging of Amadeus (Venticelli), Damn Yankees (Joe Hardy), Seussical (The Cat), The Addams Family Musical (Fester Addams), and Romeo and Juliet (Benvolio).

Carter, a Utah Rep board member, previously directed the well-reviewed Grace, Amadeus, and Doubt: A Parable for the company. He has also directed Steve Martin’s Picasso at the Lapin Agile and Sam Shepard’s True West. Q Tickets can be purchased at utahrep.org/tickets.

PHOTO: BLAKE YELAVICH

28 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | SPRING ARTS GUIDE

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 277 |

MARCH 2018

Spring Arts Guide Ballet West’s Adam Sklute shares favorite works this spring

BY TONY HOBDAY

In celebration

of his 10th anniversary as artistic director of Ballet West, Adam Sklute shares with Utah audiences some of his favorite works this April. “It’s a triple deal, and it’s something novel,” Sklute tells QSaltLake Magazine.

The Shakespeare Suite highlights Jirí Kylián’s highly athletic and profoundly emotional “Return to a Strange Land”, which deals with love and loss, set to the evocative piano music of Leoš Janácek.

Next, modern dance pioneer Merce Cunningham created in 1958 his unique “Summerspace” in collaboration with composer Morton Feldman and artist Robert Rauschenberg. Ballet West becomes one of a very few companies in the world to produce this fascinating exploration Ballet West Artistic Director into movement, Adam Sklute music, and art.

Sklute calls the third program, The Shakespeare Suite, “the anchor of the show, which I just adore and why I brought it in for my 10th anniversary with Ballet West.”

“It’s by the British choreographer David Bintley, and it’s a series of vignettes based on different Shakespeare plays, and is slick and contemporary, and set to the music of jazz composer Duke Ellington,” Skulte says. He adds that it is

Allison Debona and Rex Tilton in the Ballet West production of The Shakespeare Suite

a Utah premiere, with a live jazz band in accompaniment.

Several of Shakespeare’s notable plays highlighted in elegance, hilarity, and theatricality include Romeo & Juliet, The Taming of the Shrew, and Macbeth.

“Like in The Taming of the Shrew, she appears in a dirty, torn up wedding gown and Converse high top sneakers, and it gets hilarious,” Sklute describes. “In Macbeth, Macbeth wears a kilt and has red punked-out hair that looks like a crown, and Lady Macbeth is in a ’80s power suit.”

“Each of these short vignettes is genius, and part of the fun is that each one kind of distills the Shakespeare story in a hip way of looking at them — like Othello in dreadlocks and Richard III in an evening gown,” he continues.

Overall, the program is “quite short” but creates a full program “that moves from being stunningly beautiful to being hilariously funny and again it’s set to jazz music, not typical for a ballet,” says Sklute. “It’s like watching short-atten-

PHOTO: BEAU PEARSON

tion-span theatre!” (Laughs.)

The Shakespeare Suite runs April 11–21, dates and times vary at Capitol Theatre, 50 W. 200 South. Tickets $29–87, artsaltlake.org.

Ballet West promises a dramatic and breathtaking season for its 55th anniversary next year. The season opens with Jewels, George Balanchine’s only plotless full-length ballet inspired by his relationship with jeweler Claude Arpels.

A major Utah premiere will highlight the spring of 2019, with the staging of John Cranko’s internationally renowned telling of Alexander Pushkin’s Onegin in April.

“For many years I have dreamed of bringing Onegin to Utah,” said Sklute. “I consider this one of the great ballets of the 20th century.”

Swan Lake and The Nutcracker return, as well as some other incredible performances. Q More information at BalletWest.org

MARCH 2018 |

A&E | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 29

ISSUE 277 | Qsaltlake.com

mr. manners

Theatrical manners

For as

BY ROCK MAGEN

long as I can remember, I have always owned a suit.

I don’t know if this is attributed to my Southern roots, or can be traced back to a mother who believed all culture stemmed from attending a stage show — regardless, my life full of etiquette for the arts is a blessing. As we prepare for spring, it’s time again to give everyone a refresher so you are not the odd man out.

Unless posted, there is not a formal dress code for attending the theater.

But, we know that just because something isn’t in writing doesn’t mean it is unknown. Some people like to dress up and make a night of it, and some people go in jeans. My rule of thumb is that you should dress similar to the performers on

stage. If the ensemble is wearing tuxedos, then start with a suit and work up from there. If the performance is less formal, at least wear a blazer. One thing to keep in mind is that, like movie theaters, live theater can be highly air-conditioned in the summer, so the blazer is a must.

Now that we have dressed the part, we need to talk about how to act in public.

As you may recall a particular wave of rude theatergoers that has hindered the experience for others. Before you find yourself being the next offender, I recommend you also incorporate a few etiquette tips to keep in mind for your next theater outing.

Stand in Line — Stay in Your Seat If there is a line outside of the theater, stand at the end of it and wait your turn to enter. Chances are, the show won’t start until everyone in the line is in the theater, so there’s no need to cut.

Don’t Get Up During A Performance There are three ample opportunities to blow your nose, use the bathroom, or send text messages before, midway through, and after a show. It’s rude to interrupt another person’s theater experience by getting up during a performance to use the bathroom or make a phone call.

You’re Not the Only Person Attending the Show Be courteous to others. There are other people around you, so please try not to take up more than one seat. Your coat and shopping bags did not pay for the seat next to you, so refrain from making yourself at home. Please be gracious to the people around you.

While this list is not exhaustive, I hope this has cleared a few things before we start this next theater season. Just follow the rules for this upcoming arts cycle, and I guarantee you will not be the victim of Patti LuPone’s next audience attack. No one wants to be that guy. Trust me. Q

30 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FOOD & DRINK

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 277 |

MARCH 2018

‘Angels in America’ lands in Utah County After making their mark in the local community as a theater for audiences interested in works outside of the area’s typical family-friendly fare, An Other Theater Company will be presenting Tony Kushner’s groundbreaking Angels in America beginning February 9.

Despite, or perhaps because of, its unique connection to the LDS religion, Angels in America, described in its subtitle as a “Gay Fantasia on National Themes” has rarely if ever, been previously produced in Utah County.

Set in the midst of the AIDS epidemic, the play follows a cross-section of characters in New York City — a gay man dying of AIDS, his Jewish boyfriend, a black former drag queen, an infamous lawyer, and most notably to a local audience: a closeted, married Mormon man struggling with both his relationships to his Valium-addicted wife and his strict Mormon mother. Their paths begin to cross as a heavenly voice calls down to him, telling him to “prepare the way.”

Directing the production is Kacey Spadafora, who acts as one of the company’s artistic directors along with Taylor Jack Nelson. “During the rehearsal process, I’ve been struck by how relevant many of these themes that were being dramatized initially in 1993 are to us, here, today,” says Spadafora. “Not only does it examine a wide variety of people with a wide variety of opinions and outlooks, but it does so always from a place of compassion and understanding.”

PUZZLE SOLUTIONS

The company will be presenting Millennium Approaches, part one of the twopart play, as a full production, running Fridays and Saturdays, Feb. 9 through March 3, at 7 p.m. Tickets $10, www. anothertheatercompany.com. A staged reading of part two, Perestroika, will be presented on March 11–12.

Since opening within the Provo Towne Centre in September of 2017 after previously producing plays in found spaces or the Great Salt Lake Fringe Festival, An Other Theater Company has set out to produce

art rarely seen in the area. They seek to provide a voice to many overlooked in the mainstream local theatre scene, including stipulations in its season selection process to highlight works by and about women as well as the LGBT community.

1 3 8 7 5 6 4 2 9

6 8 2 3 7 1 5 9 4

3 4 1 5 6 9 2 7 8

9 7 5 4 2 8 6 3 1

7 5 6 2 8 4 9 3 1

8 2 3 4 9 5 6 1 7

4 6 1 8 7 3 5 9 2

9 7 5 1 6 2 8 4 3

4 9 7 1 8 2 3 5 6 1 8 2 9 3 7 4 5 6

2 5 6 9 4 3 1 8 7 3 4 9 6 5 1 7 2 8

6 3 4 5 1 8 2 7 9 4 8 1 5 6 3 8 9 4 7 1 2

5 9 7 3 2 6 1 8 4 6 3 5 7 2 9 6 1 5 8 4 3

2 1 8 7 4 9 3 6 5 9 2 7 8 1 4 2 3 7 9 6 5

5 3 1 2 7 9 6 4 8

7 2 8 3 6 4 1 9 5

4 9 6 5 1 8 3 7 2

8 3 2 1 5 6 9 4 7 8 5 6 2 3 1 6 7 5 8 9 4

7 9 1 2 4 8 6 5 3 1 9 2 4 8 7 1 9 2 5 3 6

6 4 5 3 7 9 8 1 2 7 4 3 9 5 6 8 4 3 1 2 7

8 7 4 5 2 1 9 6 3 5 6 3 7 9 2 1 8 4

1 6 9 3 8 4 7 5 2 1 8 9 4 6 3 7 2 5

5 2 3 9 6 7 4 1 8 4 2 7 5 8 1 3 9 6

7 9 8 2 5 6 3 4 1 9 1 4 6 3 5 2 7 8

3 4 2 7 1 9 6 8 5 2 7 6 8 1 4 5 3 9

6 1 5 4 3 8 2 7 9 3 5 8 9 2 7 4 6 1

MARCH 2018 |

FOOD & DRINK | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 31

ISSUE 277 | Qsaltlake.com

DINING GUIDE Fabby Award Winner

275 S 1300 E SLC

801-582-5700 1320 E 200 S SLC 801-233-1999

Most Fabby in Park City

Brew Pub

2016 BEST PIZZA

Fabby Awards

801-582-5700

FABBY SLC

801-466-5100

3321 So. 200 E SLC

TOP OF MAIN STREET FABBY SUMMER PATIO

801-495-4095

10627 S Redwood Rd. South Jordan

801-627-1920

7186 S Union Park Ave 4300 Harrison Blvd Midvale Ogden

Serving Lunch and Dinner Daily, Weekend Brunch $2 Mid-Day Mimosas, Bloody Marys and Nooners 147 W. Broadway , SLC

LUNCH, DINNER, COCKTAILS 18 W MARKET ST / 801.519.9595

250 MAIN STREET, PARK CITY 2100 SOUTH HIGHLAND DRIVE SLC

University: 258 South 1300 East Cottonwood: 3698 East Ft. Union Blvd.

270 South Rio Grande St. In the Historic Rio Grande Train Station www.riograndecafeslc.com

Next to Club Try-Angles, Half Block from TRAX Coffee, burgers, sandwiches, soups, salads, appetizers, breakfast Pool table, big-screen tv HOURS: Mon–Thur 8am–6pm / Fri 7am–3pm Friday & Saturday 1am–2:30am Sunday Brunch 11am–2pm 259 W 900 S / 801-364-4307 OFFTRAXSLC.COM

ADVERTISE 801-997-9763

227 25th St 801.605.8400

401 E. 900 S. 385.202.7366

1968 E. Murray-Holladay Rd 385-695-5148

32 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | A&E

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 277 |

MARCH 2018

KIDS at

drag

BY CHAD ANDERSON

“Guys,

tonight, we are gonna play drag queen bingo.”

“What’s a drag queen?” one son asked.

“What’s bingo?” the other asked.

I sat down on the floor to explain that bingo was a game where someone called out numbers, and you and to watch your card to get patterns of numbers and the first one to get it won prizes. With a visual demonstration, they quickly understood.

Explaining drag queens was a little trickier.

“You know how some of Dad’s friends are transgender?” The boys nodded, remembering what that meant. “And you know how last Christmas, your uncle dressed as a girl for Halloween, but he isn’t transgender, and he’s not a girl, right?”

“Right, of course.”

“Well, drag queens are kind of like that. They aren’t transgender. They are men who like to dress up like women, sometimes in pretty silly costumes so that they can perform. They are more like, well, like clowns. They usually wear big, big wigs, and lots of makeup, and silly dresses. Some of them have a giant bra on with, like, decorations on it. And they are really silly and funny.”

The boys asked a few questions, but they swiftly understood the concept.

My 9-year-old, J, remembered a recent rerun of Pokemon he’d seen where the character Jigglypuff sings and puts everyone to sleep, then draws marker all over their faces. “What if Jigglypuff put everyone in this house to sleep and then turned them into silly drag queens before they woke up?” We all shared a laugh.

A few hours later, we walked up to the church cultural hall where the bingo

event is held. Several dozen people packed in at round tables.

There were hugs and greetings exchanged around the room, people purchasing snacks and cards, and coats hung on the backs of chairs. As the event began, the announcer, over a microphone, welcomed four drag queens out on the floor. One had a floral dress, a bright wig, and a thick mustache.

The most extravagant was Petunia Pap Smear, who happened to be a friend of mine, wearing a large brassiere with fluorescent tassels spilling out of each breast, a giant cartoon-like wig that looked like flames, and huge plastic spectacles. My sons watched the queens with amusement, fascination, and confusion, as they paraded around explaining charitable donations, party fouls, and complex rules.

Over the following hour, the kids learned how to monitor their bingo cards, to find the right numbers under each letter and how to check the board for marked off numbers, and how to listen for the rules for each round, regarding bingo, blackout, center square, etc. Petunia came up behind me at one point and asked quietly if the kids might enjoy getting a party foul, and I shook my head no, at least not yet. So as the night went on, other tables were fouled, for inane reasons such as sending a text message or having their elbows on the table. Tables with party fouls move to the center of the room, where they put on a large and frilly hat, then grab a butterfly net, dance around to music and collect money from the other tables. All of the money collected goes to a local charity of some kind. The entire set-up was elaborate and adorable.

About 20 minutes into the event, A, my

younger son, age 6, grew a bit bored and wanted to be entertained. I pulled out a notebook full of scrap paper and a pen — items I packed in just for this eventuality.

I gave him a few drawing assignments, and he passed his bingo card to someone else as he drew pictures titled “the War of the Gorillas”, “the Healthy Vegetable Patch”, and “Spaceships Invade Earth!”

A is a prolific artist, one who focuses on delightful details, taking the assignment and embellishing it with elements all his own. In “the Healthy Vegetable Patch” for example, he drew a plot of dirt with growing vegetables, then drew an entire family of spiders who lived above the patch. As he showed me the drawing, he told me each of the spiders’ names. The spider family included two children, one who “always gets into trouble” and one who is “very boring.” I’m consistently delighted by his art.

Growing bored again, A wanted more assignments. I looked around, then smiled, giving him the assignment to draw “Drag Queen Bingo.” Sticking his tongue out slightly, he looked around the room, examined the different drag queens, and then sketched them in adorable detail. He drew four figures in two rows, each with arms and legs spread out, as if performing, singing, and dancing perhaps, or just posing. With

MARCH 2018 |

A&E | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 33

ISSUE 277 | Qsaltlake.com

four different hairstyles and appearances, and each with long eyelashes, he detailed the four queens. One had shaggy hair and a thick mustache; her toes turned inward. One had on a skirt over pants, with enormous lashes and a stacked wig on her head. One had long flowing hair, a round stomach, and a large bra with tassels hanging from the tips. The last was impossibly skinny with a tiny head and long braids. While they weren’t direct reflections of the queens present, they were close enough, and as we passed the drawing around the table, we all laughed in delight.

During the next bingo break, I walked the drawing up to Petunia, who held the microphone, and told her about it. She laughed, and soon she held the picture up for the assembled crowd, laughing about it and telling others that it was perhaps just

a bit too accurate.

“Can the young man who drew this picture please stand up?”

A stood up on his chair and took a small bow as instructed.

“Such realism!” Petunia said. “How accurate! Whatever inspired you to draw such a thing?”

In his husky voice, A shouted back across the crowd, heard by all. “My dad made me do it!”

As the crowd erupted in laughter, I felt my cheeks turn pink with happy embarrassment. During the final break, my sons and I stood up and got a picture with the queens, and during the drive home, they laughed about how much fun they’d had.

For a brief moment, I thought back to my youth.

Even a decade earlier, if I had heard of something like “drag queen bingo” I would have tsked, seeing it as something

frivolous, sinful, and certainly not a family activity. That night, I’d sat with my sons in a room full of people in love with life and having an incredible time. We were happy, laughing, and entertained. And I celebrated the

Gay Mormon Dad

A MEMOIR CH AD ANDER SON

new moments that I got to share with my sons, even as men in jeweled bras and wigs ran around. Q Chad Anderson blogs at SnapshotsOfChad. com. His new book, “Gay Mormon Dad” is available at Amazon in Kindle and paperback formats at bit.ly/GayMormonDad.

Available Now on Kindle or in Paperback at Amazon.com

Chad Anderson grew up gay in a large Mormon family. After years of trying to conform to religious standards, which promised a cure for homosexuality, he married and had children before finally coming out of the closet. Gay Mormon Dad is his story of finally learning to love himself in a complicated world. Chad currently resides with his two sons in Salt Lake City, where he works as a social worker and a writer.

Order now at bit.ly/GayMormonDad

For Everyone’s Wedding Flower Needs

34 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | LOVE

6

Qsaltlake.com |

reasons why Colorado Springs is the most romantic place you’ve never thought of

BY MIKEY ROX

A lot of

people vacay in big cities or by the beach.

Not me. I’ve lived near both all my life, so when I plan a getaway, I want to pack it with come-as-you-are, in-the-wild adventure. Real Davy Crockett-like. You know — if he was gay.

Recently, my boyfriend and I traveled to Colorado Springs for what we hoped would be a fast few days of getting active, reconnecting with one another, and making new memories. We did all that and more.

From hiking frozen waterfalls and practicing yoga fireside to dangling 1,200 feet above the Arkansas River on a zip line, this trip was one of the most romantic we’ve ever taken. Here are six Mavis Ads.pdf 2 2/13/2018 3:08:03 PM unforgettable reasons why.

1

There are nine waterfalls to which you can hike (and get all grabby on the way up)

We arrived in Colorado Springs well before check-in at the Wyndham’s New Orleans-inspired Mining Exchange Grand Hotel and Spa (certainly the nicest joint in the area, notwithstanding the pricier Broadmoor resort). We made the most of our time by driving the rental car straight to the base of Helen Hunt Falls (named in honor of the 19th-century writer and Native American activist — not the Academy Award-winning actress we assumed; we’ll take one for the team on this one), located in North Cheyenne Cañon Park.

Despite milder temps than on the East Coast — we narrowly escaped the “bomb cyclone” to get to Colorado — much of

ISSUE 277 |

MARCH 2018

the falls was frozen, though not solid enough that we couldn’t fill our bottles with the ice-cold spring water beneath the cracked surface. Tastiest we’ve ever drunk.

Then we were off. The hike, though steep, was only .1 miles of escalating, winding trail, which took about 20 minutes to climb. We stopped at a few points to catch our breath and snap photos while admiring nature’s handiwork. It was the first time either one of us had ventured into a legitimate mountain range, so we were keen to soak up the surroundings.

At the top, pure magnificence! Normally falls that flow freely (as it probably does again now), Helen Hunt was solid and stark white. Ice. Frozen in time. A real sight to see.

If you want even more of a workout, there are other falls in the area to hike, including Silver Cascade Falls, about two-thirds of a mile above Helen Hunt Falls, and Seven Falls, a series of cascading drop-offs, one more photographic than the other.

C

M

Y

M

MY

Y

MY

K

ALL EVENTS AT THE ECCLES CENTER FOR THE PERFORMING ARTS 1750 KEARNS BLVD / PARK CITY, UT

TICKETS FROM $29 BOX OFFICE 435-655-3114 PARKCITYINSTITUTE.ORG

MARCH 2018 |

2

Ristorante Del Lago at the Broadmoor is the perfect place to get cozy over a carafe of wine

Despite that the Broadmoor resort wasn’t on our initial itinerary, we decided to pop in on our way back from Helen Hunt Falls (GPS will take you directly through the expansive property) because of all the recommendations from friends who had spent time in the area. Glad we did. It was an ideal spot to relax after the hike (it’s a meticulously kept five-star resort with attentive, friendly staff; everybody said hello to us!), particularly Ristorante Del Lago — just across the lake bridge on the backside of the main entrance where we plopped on an inviting couch, ordered a carafe of wine, and cuddled up in front of the fireplace until warm and toasty.

3

LOVE | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 35

ISSUE 277 | Qsaltlake.com

Mineral-water soaks and fireside yoga will eliminate your collective aches and pains

Just down the road in Manitou Springs (a 10-minute drive from downtown Colorado Springs) is SunWater Spa, which features heated cedar tubs with bubbling, body-healing mineral water — an excellent place to strip down to your swimwear (yes, you have to wear something) and relax in the bath. We detoxed in the infrared sauna, took a load off in the indoor therapy pools, then joined our yogi Georgiy for a fireside class where we focused on our breathing and overall consciousness while occasionally holding outstretched hands.

4

You’ll be in awe of the scenery up to Pikes Peak while taking photos you’ll cherish forever

Our scenic drive up to Pikes Peak — the highest in the area at 14,115 feet (and actively climbing) was the activity we most looked forward to because neither of us had ever been that high in the sky.

We didn’t know quite what to expect from the 19-mile paved spiral to the top, though we were hopeful for a few magnificent lookouts and wandering wildlife.

It didn’t disappoint.

There were plenty of pull-offs with jaw-dropping vistas of snowcapped mountains; large Instagram-ready lakes frozen six-inches thick; never-before-seen-by-us animals, like bighorn sheep clinging to near vertical rises; and, of course, the reward of satisfying chicken soup and fresh, hot doughnuts inside the visitor’s center to commemorate our voyage and this exploratory milestone in our relationship.

5

A Jeep tour of Royal Gorge will make daredevils out of you

About an hour southwest of Colorado Springs lies Cañon City, where we hopped in one of Colorado Jeep Tours’ all-terrain vehicles for a half-day tour of the Royal Gorge region (our tour guide Steve could teach a master class on the area’s history and geology). He took us through rocky peaks and valleys, sometimes teetering on the edge, and culminating in crossing America’s highest suspension bridge.

Instead of driving across the bridge, however, we ramped up the oh-crap! factor

by flinging ourselves across the canyon on a 1,200-foot high zip line. Although we survived the harrowing-slash-exhilarating experience, it did give our hearts a workout on the don’t-look-down journey.

To acknowledge our survival, we spent the rest of the afternoon giving thanks for our wills to live (and each other) over a VIP wine and cheese tasting at the award-winning Winery at Holy Cross Abbey, set against the spectacular backdrop of the Wet Mountains.

6

Sunrise in Garden of the Gods will take your breath away

Before our early afternoon flight home, we made one last stop at can’t-miss Garden of the Gods, a registered National Natural Landmark, to watch the sunrise.

Entering the park before daylight was out of our comfort zone (what kind of animals are lurking in the dark? Just bunnies and bats as it turned out), but that’s what this trip was all about — trying new things together, and clinging to one another for reassurance and safety. And as the sky filled with the fiery pink-orange glow of another day dawning, our romantic getaway was whole with the reveal of 300-foot towering sandstone rock formations in a park with a rich past that dates back to a time when dinosaurs roamed the earth.

Perfect place to leave our footprints in Colorado Springs — side by side. Q Mikey Rox is an award-winning journalist and LGBT lifestyle expert whose work has been published in more than 100 outlets across the world. He lives with his dog Jaxon.

Connect with Mikey on Twitter @mikeyrox.

36 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | COMICS

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 277 |

MARCH 2018

MARCH 2018 |

ISSUE 277 | Qsaltlake.com

COMICS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 37

38 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | MARKETPLACE

A DV E R T I S I N G

YOUR AD HERE

GET INTO OUR NEW SERVICE GUIDE SECTION FOR AS LOW AS $50/MO

marketplace C AT E R I N G

Qsaltlake.com |

DJ SERVICE S

ISSUE 277 |

MARCH 2018

HAIR SALON

IERE UTAH’S PRAERM Y PORT-A-P T hair

WEDDINGS & CATERING We tailor everything to fit your event from a beautiful venue to delectable food

801-997-9763

CALL: 801-610-4110 OR VISIT: UTAHCATERING.COM

BARBER

COOLING

WEDDINGS, MUSIC FOR, PA RTIES SOUND & TE TS EN EV CORPORA

ROGERLCOX@GMAIL.COM

801·609·IDEA ( 4

Robert Moody

at Image Studios Draper 177 W 12300 S 3 3 2 )

DJ SERVICE S

801-688-3118

INSURANCE

I make insurance simple • Home • Auto • Life • Business

Air Conditioning, Heating & Plumbing Experts Since 1969

Al Boltis

Life Home Auto Insurance Agent 801-233-3189

ComfortSystemsUtah.com 2035 S Milestone Dr #A

801-907-6700 BEAUT Y

COUNSELORS

Al.boltis@fbfs.com

D J PA U LY E V E N T S . C O M 8 01 554 8647 F I N A N C I A L A DV I S O R

A place of mutual respect & an individualized approach

Lynn and Richard Huber

Embracing the health & resilience of our community

801-449-1882 VenturaBeauty.com B E D & B R E A K FA S T

DK

COUNSELORS

Ryan Taylor

Owner / Financial Adviser Direct 801-453-2224 RyanDTaylor@ FinancialGuide.com

FUNERAL SERVICE S

GREAT SERVICE AND QUALITY WITHOUT THE GREAT COST

ream atchers BED & BREAKFAST

• FUNERAL • CREMATION • VETERAN SERVICES

at LAKE POWELL

ADVANCED awareness COUNSELING BIG WATER, UTAH

stay@dreamkatcherslakepowell.com

Custom

6330 S 3000 E STE 600, SALT LAKE CITY LGBTFINANCIAL.ORG

ERIC & JAROD invite you to their

435-675-5828

KITCHEN DESIGN

408-375-3311

Red Rock F I N A N C I A L AUTO PURCHASE LOANS PERSONAL LOANS VACATION/HOLIDAY LOANS RECREATIONAL LOANS CONSOLIDATION LOANS MURRAY: 4842 S State St

Proudly gender affirming and supporting

advancedawarenesscounseling.com 9140 S State St Ste 202

LENDERS

801-255-8101

redrockfinancialloans.com

385-528-1804

saltlakefuneralhome.com

AVOID HIGH INTEREST AND PAYDAY LOANS. WE REPORT YOUR MONTHLY PAYMENT TO CREDIT BUREAU TO IMPROVE YOUR CREDIT RATING.

MARCH 2018 |

MARKETPLACE | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 39

ISSUE 277 | Qsaltlake.com

M A S S AG E

䄀氀漀栀愀

T R AV E L

䈀伀䐀夀圀伀刀䬀匀

801-308-2050

吀爀漀礀 䠀甀渀琀攀爀Ⰰ 䰀䴀吀

www.jonjepsen.com

㠀 ㄀⸀㐀㔀㔀⸀㈀㐀㤀㜀 M O R T G AG E S

VIDEO SERVICE S

Christine Cardamon 801-661-9662

ccardamon@gmail.com / NMLS# 1370848/3013

www.graystonemortgage.com/ccardamon fb.me/christinecardamonmortgageloanofficer

R E A L E S TAT E

Mary Olsen REALTOR

Specializing in LGBT WEDDINGS and special event VIDEOGRAPHY stonewallweddings.net VO I C E L E S S O N S

®

801-661-3175

Mary@MoreProfessionals.com

www.MovingWithMaryUtah.com facebook.com/MovingwithMary

TA R O T

吀䄀刀伀吀 䘀漀爀攀挀愀猀琀椀渀最Ⰰ 愀渀猀眀攀爀猀 愀渀搀 猀漀氀甀琀椀漀渀猀 琀漀 礀漀甀爀 氀椀昀攀ᤠ猀 焀甀攀猀琀椀漀渀猀

䜀䄀䔀䄀 唀一䤀嘀䔀刀匀 吀䄀刀伀吀 ␀㈀ ⼀㘀 䴀䤀一匀 簀 ␀㄀ ⼀㌀ 䴀䤀一匀⸀

㌀㠀㔀ⴀ㐀㐀㔀ⴀ 㜀㘀㔀

UTAH VOCAL STUDIO

Pride Counseling • Support Groups • Holistic Approach • Build Intimacy & Trust • Explore Spiritual Options • Strengthen Relationships • Transgender Issues

Jerry Buie MSW, LCSW

801.595.0666 Office 801.557.9203 Cell 1174 E Graystone Way, Suite 20-E JerryBuie@mac.com WWW.PRIDECOUNSELING.TV

SINGING LESSONS ROGER COX 801.609.4332 UtahVocalStudio.com BEGINNERS TO ADVANCED

Support the Salt Lake Men’s Choir when you shop on Amazon using

WEDDING SERVICE S

TYING THE KNOT? Know who WANTS your business and will treat you with the DIGNITY and RESPECT you deserve

It’s easy! You shop. Amazon gives.

1. Bookmark bit.ly/saltlakemenschoir 2. Use that link to shop on the same Amazon you always use 3. Enjoy your purchase (and that warm feeling knowing that a percentage of your sale supports the choir) Easy, peasy! Thanks!

SaltLakeMensChoir.org

40 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | QMMUNITY

Qmmunity Groups ALCOHOL & DRUG

Alcoholics Anonymous

Tues. 7pm, 6876 S Highland Dr Wed. noon, 2319 Foothill Dr, #120 Weds. 6:30 pm, Univ

801-484-7871

Neuropsych Institute,

 utahaa.org

501 Chipeta Way #566

LGBT meetings: Sun. 3p Acceptance Group, UPC, 255 E 400 S Mon. 7p Gay Men’s Stag (Big Book Study), UPC, 255 E 400 S 8p G/Q Women’s Mtg, Disability Law Center (rear), 205 N 400 W Tues. 8:15p Live & Let Live, UPC, 255 E 400 S Wed. 7p Sober Today, 375 Harrison Blvd, Ogden Fri. 8p Stonewall Group, UPC, 255 E 400 S Crystal Meth Anon  crystalmeth.org

Sun. 1:30pm Clean, Sober & Proud LGBTQIA+Straight USARA, 180 E 2100 S Thurs. 1p Unity In Sobriety, 175 S 700 E LifeRing Secular Recovery 385-258-3788  liferingutah.org

Sun. 10am Univ. Neuropsychiatric Institute, 501 Chipeta Way #1566 Mon. 5pm, First Unitarian Church, 569 S 1300 E

Thurs. 7pm, USARA, 180 E 2100 S, #100 Fri. 7pm, 2212 S West Temple #29

Qsaltlake.com |

HEALTH & HIV

Peer Support for Mental Illness — PSMI

6:30 pm Mondays

Thurs 7pm, Utah Pride

* info@equalityutah.org

Community Writing

Ctr (when reopened)

175 W 200 S, Ste 1004

Planned Parenthood 654 S 900 E 800-230-PLAN Salt Lake County Health Dept HIV/STD Clinic 660 S 200 E, 4th Floor Walk-ins M–F 10a–4p Appts 385-468-4242

Church, 777 S 1300 E

Utah AIDS Foundation  utahaids.org

LGBTQ-Affirmative

* mail@utahaids.org

Psycho-therapists Guild

1408 S 1100 E

of Utah  lgbtqtherapists.com * jim@lgbtqtherapists.com

Utah Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce  utahgaychamber.com * info@utahgaychamber.com

Vest Pocket Business Coalition

801-487-2323 Weber-Morgan Health Mon., Weds 1-4:30p 477 23rd St, Ogden Appt 801-399-7250 HOMELESS SVCS

Volunteers of America Homeless Youth Resource Ctr, ages 15–21 880 S 400 W

 vestpocket.org

801-364-0744

801-596-8977

Transition Homes:

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-7233 YWCA of Salt Lake

Gay Writes writing group, DiverseCity

 equalityutah.org

Sat. 11am, First Baptist

BUSINESS

POLITICAL

Equality Utah

Young Men’s 801-433-1713 Young Women’s 801-359-5545 LEGAL

Rainbow Law Free Clinic

 ywca.org/saltlakecity

2nd Thurs 6:30–7:30pm

322 E 300 S

UofU Law School, 383

801-537-8600

S University St

801-355-3479 Utah Libertarian Party 6885 S State St #200 888-957-8824 Utah Log Cabin Republicans  bit.ly/logcabinutah

801-657-9611 Utah Stonewall Democrats  utahstonewalldemocrats.org

RELIGIOUS

First Baptist Church

 menwhomove.org

OUTreach Utah Ogden  outreachutah.org

OWLS of Utah (Older, Wiser, Lesbian. Sisters)  bit.ly/owlsutah

Queer Friends  queerfriends.org

qVinum Wine Tasting  qvinum.com

* office@firstbaptist-

 fb.me /QVinum/

slc.org 11a Sundays 777 S 1300 E 801-582-4921 Sacred Light of Christ  slcchurch.org

823 S 600 E 801-595-0052 11a Sundays Wasatch Metropolitan Community Church  wasatchmcc.org

801-889-8764 Sundays, 11a at Mestizo Coffee, 631 W N Temple SOCIAL

1 to 5 Club (bisexual)  fb.me/ 1to5ClubUtah

The Bonnie and Clyde’s Social Group Alternative Garden Club  bit.ly/altgarden *

altgardenclub@gmail.com blackBOARD Men’s Kink/Sex/BDSM education, 1st, 3rd Mons.  blackbootsslc.org

blackBOOTS Kink/BDSM

umen.org

 bit.ly/GetOutsideUtah

Men Who Move

 firstbaptist-slc.org

 bit.ly/BonnieClydeSG

OUT U.S. OLYMPIC MEN’S SLOPESTYLE SILVER MEDALIST GUS KENWORTHY

Ctr, 210 E 400 S Ste 8 Get Outside Utah

Sage Utah, Seniors  fb.me/sageutah  sageutah@

utahpridecenter.org 801-557-9203 Temple Squares Square Dance Club  templesquares.org

801-449-1293 Utah Bears  utahbears.com  fb.me/utahbears  info@utahbears.com

Weds 6pm Raw Bean Coffee, 611 W Temple Utah Male Naturists  umen.org  info@umen.org

Utah Pride Center  utahpridecenter.org  info@

utahpridecenter.org New location soon 801-539-8800 SPORTS

Pride Community Softball League

Men’s leather/kink/

 fb.me/utahpride.

fetish/BDSM 4th Sats.

softballleague

 blackbootsslc.org

 pcsl@prideleague.com

ISSUE 277 |

MARCH 2018

Q Kickball League  fb.me/qsaltlake. kickball Sundays, 10:30, 11:30, Sunnyside Park QUAC — Queer Utah Aquatic Club  quacquac.org  questions@ quacquac.org Salt Lake Goodtime Bowling League  bit.ly/slgoodtime Stonewall Shooting Sports of Utah  fb.me/stonewall. sportsofutah Venture Out Utah  facebook.com/groups/ Venture.OUT.Utah YOUTH/COLLEGE

Encircle LGBTQ Family and Youth Resource Center  encircletogether.org fb.me/encircletogether 91 W 200 S, Provo, Gay-Straight Alliance Network  gsanetwork.org Salt Lake Community College LGBTQ+ 8 slcc.edu/lgbtq/ University of Utah LGBT Resource Center 8 lgbt.utah.edu 200 S Central Campus Dr Rm 409 801-587-7973 USGA at BYU  fb.me/UsgaAtByu Utah State Univ. Access & Diversity Ctr  usu.edu/ accesscenter/lgbtqa Utah Valley Univ Spectrum  facebook.com/ groups/uvuspectrum Weber State University LGBT Resource Center  weber.edu/ lgbtresourcecenter 801-626-7271

MARCH 2018 |

A&E | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 41

ISSUE 277 | Qsaltlake.com

book review

Transgender History: The Roots of Today’s Revolution (Revised Edition)

by Susan Stryker, c.2008, 2017, Seal Press, $17.99, 303 pages It had to start somewhere.

Someone had to make the first step, to pave the way, to stick a fork into the ground and say, “Here, now.” Someone had to be the first so that others could follow, and in the newly updated book Transgender History by Susan Stryker, you’ll see where we go next.

Opening a history book with a chapter on terms and words might seem odd but, says Stryker, “remarkable changes” over the last decade demand it. Thus begins this book, with new language for what is an old lifestyle.

Indeed, America’s first recorded “intersex” individual was Thomas(ine) Hall, who lived in the 1620s, “sometimes as a man and sometimes as a woman.” Seventy years later, however, the colony of Massachusetts made “cross-dressing” illegal, and it spread: By the 1850s, many U.S. cities had ordinances against dressing in clothing customarily worn by the opposite sex.

And yet, it was hard to stop people who wanted to dress as or fully transition to another gender. Throughout the 1800s, records show that women dressed as men for battle, cross-dressers braved the frontier, men ran away from their families to be true to their feminine selves, and Native American cultures embraced transgender people. After the invention of anesthesia and surgeries were safer, “individuals began approaching doctors

to request a surgical alteration of parts of their bodies,” says Stryker.

For a time, then, the movement was relatively quiet — by necessity, as the Nazis proved when they torched Dr. Magnus Hirschfeld’s Institute for Sexual Science in Berlin — until American Christine Jorgensen “burst onto the scene” in late 1952 when she traveled to Copenhagen for trans surgery. Her ensuing fame didn’t signal full acceptance for trans people, but it was a start: Riots in 1959 led to activism in the 1960s, and post-Stonewall groups consolidated to lend support and work through “difficult decades” of the ‘70s, ‘80s, and the AIDS crisis. Today, says Stryker, though we live in interesting times of Trump and turmoil, the news is heartening. Millennials and “post-Baby Boomers” have expressed more acceptance of “transgender as part of the ‘anti-heteronormative’ mix.”

Though Transgender History is a revised edition of a book first published a decade ago, it has a fresh feel thanks to that which author Susan Stryker has added.

The first chapter, somewhat of a dictionary, schools readers on new ways of talking about LGBTQ issues and individuals, while the last chapter of trans history brings readers up to the present, including topics of politics, potties, and celebrity.

What makes it unusual is that, though it’s not always chronological, it’s breezy and casually readable. There’s no stuffiness here, and no air of the scholarly: Stryker makes this history accessible for people who want a story and not a textbook.

And so, this book is a pleasant surprise. It’s easy to read, not overly wordy, and there are a just-right number of illustrations here for a reader’s enjoyment. For anyone who wants a basic, yet lively, overview of trans life in America, Transgender History is a great start. Q

Don’t Cuss, Call Gus

49 Sex toys, for some 51 The S of WASP ACROSS 52 Mauna ___ 1 The Death of Friends 53 What thespians do author Michael with each other 5 The A in GLARP 55 Kenworthy is often (abbr.) called this for being 9 Fairy story figure vocal about LGBTQ 14 How far up it goes issues (abbr.)

61 Feature of Langston 15 Syngman of Korea Hughes’ work 16 Dykes on Bikes mem63 Sitarist Shankar ber, e.g.

64 Nuts 17 Hairspray handle 65 Whoopi in “The 18 Bamako’s country Color Purple” 19 With a wide-open 66 Ghostbusters role mouth 67 Chimp that was out 20 Gus Kenworthy in space displayed this in a 68 Sailor’s rear Head & Shoulders 69 Emulated Rufus commercial Wainwright 23 The Simpsons barkeep 70 Hungers 24 Hard top?

25 Kind of key, for Jerry DOWN 1 Not even once, to Herman Dickinson 27 Town in da Vinci’s 2 Alan of And the Band land Played On 30 The Music Man com3 Part of Caesar’s boast poser Willson 33 Tammy Faye’s old club 4 Ahead, in da Vinci’s land 34 Wood that doesn’t 5 Powder rooms? need moth balls 6 Peggy of WOW Cafe 36 Tonto’s erection 7 Word with gratifica37 Pretty in Pink setting tion or abuse 39 Almodovar’s mister 8 Hairspray coproducer 41 Practice hitting a with Craig Zadan shirtless man 9 Cop show about 42 One of Caesar’s catching some queens? stones 10 Sham locks 44 Dead duck 11 First openly gay man 46 Fruit sugar ending to qualify for the 47 Female impersonator’s pencil application Winter Olympics

12 Car that used to be yours 13 Like love, for some 21 Fruit of Peter Pears?

22 k.d. lang’s “The ___ That I Breathe” 26 Sapphic poetry 27 Big name in computers 28 Be unfaithful to your lover 29 One of Kenworthy’s event 30 Bruce Wayne kept his Dick in one 31 Style Tracy Turnblad’s hair 32 Toast opener 35 De Rossi’s wife 38 Kunis of Black Swan 40 Dealing with an invitation 43 “___ Going on Seventeen” 45 P’s for Socrates 48 Drama in the land of Samurai 50 YouTube personality Tyler 53 Curve and others 54 Guitarist Atkins 56 “Do What U Want” Lady 57 Shakespeare could have bathed in it 58 Skye on screens 59 Supply-and-demand subj.

60 Diana, who was once a Supreme being?

62 To me, to Hirschfeld

42 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | PETS

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 277 |

MARCH 2018

Pet Month of the

Dwight

Neutered male, 7 years old Domestic shorthair — White with brown Hello! My name is Dwight and I am a loving, adventurous kitty looking for my forever home. I have done well with other cats and should do well with them in a home with a proper introduction. I have lived with a dog before, but it was a little scary! I might do well with a dog who understands kitties. I would be a great best friend so come meet me to see if I would be a good fit for your family!

into love

Adopt a cat for $10.

MARCH 1 – 31

Best Friends Pet Adoption Center 2005 South 1100 East, Salt Lake City, Utah Monday – Saturday, 11 am – 7 pm Sunday, 11 am – 4 pm

For more information, go to Best Friends Animal Society–Utah, 2005 S 1100 East, or call 801-574-2454 or go to bestfriendsutah.org

bestfriendsutah.org

q scopes MARCH

to be involved in the creative process and share what you see with others.

BY SAM KELLEY-MILLS

CANCER June 21–July 22 Feeling that things could be going better right now? Likely this feeling comes from boredom rather than failure. There is always a higher conquest and a goal to accomplish, but only because you want more than you have. Look for some new adventures but don’t lose sight of how good things are right now either.

ARIES March 20–April 19 A failure in communication with a friend can cause some problems.

Remember that we are all human, and the failings of others are mistakes, not assaults. More likely than not, a friend’s carefree attitude is simply their way of dealing with their problems. Take a moment to do the same and just chill out for a bit.

TAURUS Apr 20–May 20 Continuous nagging from someone is getting on your nerves. While it may not be so bad, the constant pressure is getting you down.

Take some time to just get away and find a sense of normal again. Rest in a place where the mind can reset. Your personal matters and career can wait. Work on yourself now GEMINI May 21–June 20 The beauty of nature will be an excellent inspirational source this month. With weather that is ever-changing and a hot-and-cold dynamic occurring, much of your duality is represented by the world itself. This could be a good time

LEO July 23–August 22 There’s nothing completely wrong in switching up the orders of operations. The more tasks that pile up, the more boredom tends to set in. Keep things interesting by having dessert first, play before work, and taking different positions than normal. It’s a good time to break the norms and alter perceptions for the better.

VIRGO August 23–Sep. 22 The need to flex the muscle of authority could be a turn off to others. Don’t be so impressed by your accomplishments that it undermines the efforts to gain respect. A friend or lover is finding an obsession rather weary, but don’t let this get you down. Find satisfaction through casual fun and lay off the

LIBRA Sept 23–October 22 Follow through on tasks that have fallen behind. The saying, “better late than never” can be applied in many ways, whether it be business or the bedroom. Communication has fallen by the wayside, and there is a lot of confusion surrounding your recent actions. Rest assured others will listen, so explain.

CAPRICORN Dec 21–Jan 19 A fellowship of friends and lovers is going to lead to nice times. Enjoy what you can and do your best to stay safe. There could be drama, but that is to be expected. No one is trying to bring you down, despite some suggestions. Allow good feelings to be channeled into the work you are doing. It never hurts to feel inspired.

SCORPIO Oct. 23–Nov. 21 It’s getting warmer, and so is your temperature, Scorpio! It may seem like a prime time to get out there and look for adventure. Stay out of danger by keeping close to those you know, and don’t travel far from home. The ability to control emotional responses may be compromised, especially regarding personal interactions.

AQUARIUS Jan. 20–Feb. 18 Whatever is troubling you is likely to affect others if not kept in check. The worst thing you can do is spread negativity, which has a tendency to bounce back. The best course of action is to take a submissive role and allow others to show what it really means to be happy.

Realize that sometimes the best action is no action.

SAGITTARIUS Nov. 22–December 20.

No is going to desert you at this time, despite a few moments of despair.

Stay focused on working on yourself and become your own pleaser. Fate has a way of bringing tragedy in threes, and you’ve already received two in a row. While this may not be quite obvious to some of you, rest assured some letdown is possible.

PISCES Feb 19–Mar 19 During what is turning out to be a lull period, spend time gaining focus. Get involved with projects and meet with people you’ve been putting off for a while. Someone may challenge your opinions in a seemingly offensive manner but don’t take it too hard. It has more to do with a competitive need than discrediting your ideas. Q

need to prove yourself.

MARCH 2018 |

HEALTH | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 43

ISSUE 277 | Qsaltlake.com

positive thoughts

Men’s Health Seminar

LI FE I S FOR LI VI N G

Women continue to face HIV-related stigma in healthcare

L EARN ABOU T EREC T I L E DYSF U N C T I ON C AU SES AND T REATMEN T S

BY DESIRÉE GUERRERO

We know HIV doesn’t discriminate — so why are women still being left out of the conversation about HIV? Recently single again after being in a decade-long monogamous relationship and finding myself thrust into a whole new world of dating apps and identities (polyamorous, pansexual, etc.), I realized it was time to start getting regular STI screenings again, including for HIV. It was about eight months into my singledom, by which time I’d had three new partners (yes, I was enjoying my exploration of polyamory). Though I had been using condoms, an STI screening was still the responsible thing to do, so I scheduled a full panel, including an HIV test, with my ob-gyn.

When I went in I was surprised to be greeted with a flurry of concerned questions from my doc: “Why do you want an HIV test? Do you think you have been exposed? Are you having any symptoms?”

“No,” I explained, a little shaken. “I am just single again after many years and have been sexually active with more than one partner. I felt it was the proper thing to do at this point.”

“Have you been using condoms?” she asked.

“Yes,” I replied.

“Well, then we shouldn’t have much too worry about,” she said, and then suddenly asked, “Do you know if any of your partners are bisexual or have sex with men?”

“Not that I know of, though my ex had been with men before.”

“Oh,” she said, feigning an uncomfortable smile. “Well, let’s just do the panel.”

Fortunately all was well, but several things left me uneasy about the visit. First, why did I have to specifically ask for an HIV test as part of my STI screening panel? Shouldn’t this be an automatic inclusion?

This day and age, should anyone have to justify the need for an HIV test?

Second, my doctor’s bedside manner on the topic left much to be desired. Not only did her alarm, alarm me, but her questioning seemed a bit invasive and irrelevant. She seemed to think it was strange of me to want an HIV test until she heard my ex had had sex with men — which wasn’t why I was getting the test done at all.

I had known for years my ex had a sexual history with men, though like many MSM, he identified as straight and I was the only person who knew this about him. Unfortunately, because of sexist and homophobic attitudes that still exist, this is the case for many MSM — and it’s rare that they would disclose this to their female partners, as in my case. So with many women not knowing whether their male partners are MSM, why should that make a distinction between my perceived HIV risk? (Also, I was tested for HIV with my ex, and we were monogamous for the last 10 years, which she didn’t ask about.)

Though it’s true that bi and gay men, and trans women, are the most at-risk groups of acquiring HIV, we know it certainly doesn’t discriminate.

Women and girls today not only need to know the facts about HIV and how to protect themselves or get care. Q

2.26.2018 Monday | 6:30 PM | Check-in 6 PM School of Dentistry Auditorium 530 Wakara Way, Salt Lake City, UT 84108 RSVP BY MONDAY, 2.19.2018 877.433.2873 OR UOFUHEALTH.ORG/MEN

Each Sudoku puzzle has a unique solution which can be reached logically without guessing. Enter digits 1 through 9 into the blank spaces. Every row must contain one of each digit, as must each column and each 3x3 square. Qdoku

Q doku Level: Easy

7 5 1

8

5 8 6

7

8 5 4 7 8 6 4 1 6 2

3 4

4 8 9 2 8

6 9 1

3

1

3

7 6

1 4 7 5 5 2 4 8 2 1 7 6 7 2 9 5 1 7 6 3 8 8 3 7 1 9 7 4 2 8 3 2 6 4 9 5 7 6 3 9

4 3 2 3 1 7 8 6 5 6 8 4 9 2 3

8

5 3 7 4 9

4 9 2 6 8 1

8 1 3 2 1 2 7 5 9

8 7

4

3 9 1 8 5 3 9 2 7 9 6 1 3 8 5 1 4 2 9 7 5 1 3 1 5 6 8

1

44 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FRIVOLIST

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 277 |

MARCH 2018

the frivolist

9

‘new’ date-night ideas to spend QT with your OG If you’ve been with your partner a while, it can be hard to come up with exciting date ideas.

Maybe you’re stuck in a dinner-and-amovie rut — if you’re making time to “date” at all — or perhaps you’re so active that you’ve already done everything. Or so you think. Relight the fire in your hearts by spending quality time with that ol’ gayngsta you call boo with these full-offun, new-to-you date nights.

fore-visited places in familiar territory.

Choose from four options — Serious, Steady, Flirting, and Digital Only — that range in price from about $33 down to $8 per month. DATEBOX (getdatebox.com) is a monthly subscription that renews automatically, but you can cancel at any time with no penalty.

Fun with Science You’ll get a hands-on education during a visit to a science center. Places like THE LEONARDO (theleonardo.org) or CLARK PLANETARIUM (slco.org/clark-planetarium) offer plenty of interactive activities to do with your partner, like kissing underneath the stars in a planetarium, making paper airplanes, petting stingrays and studying the human body. Consider the last one a refresher course.

Make-and-Take Activities

Hatchet Throwing Group Pedacycle Traditionally a pedacycle refers to any motorized bike, like a moped, but more and more places, like SALT LAKE PARTY BIKE (slcpartybike.com), are introducing pedacycles built to hold upwards of 15 riders who hop on board to jointly mobilize the vehicle with only their burning leg power. This isn’t just a trip around the block, either. Most of these rides have a purpose, like a food or booze tour of an area to get you good and snockered. Great as a just-you-two date if you like meeting other couples, or get your whole squad together for this tipsy cardio workout.

Datebox Once a month you’ll receive a box in the mail (based on your likes and dislikes determined through a preliminary personality test) that contains the makings of a memorable date designed to rekindle the romance. Could be a date night in with curated activities and snacks or you might venture out to explore never-be-

Stressed out? Hurtle your aggression across a room with an ax! Joints like SOCIAL AXE THROWING (socialaxethrowing.com) in Salt Lake, and popping up in more locations across the country, arm you with a sharpened weapon to aim toward a target that awards points for where the hatchet lands on the board.

Love it enough and you could make it a weekly event by joining a league. Beats boring ol’ bowling.

Huge fan of make-and-take activities over here, and I’m always looking for the next best to-dos. Recently my boyfriend and I participated in Plant Nite (succulentplantparties.com) — an offshoot of the very popular sip-and-stroke Paint Nites (thepaintmixer.com) — where we designed our own succulent terrariums. We’ve also rolled up our sleeves to make candles, blow glass and create DIY projects in the free workshops offered

by Home Depot (homedepot.com/workshops).

VR Experience Virtual reality for public consumption has been around for a few decades, but it’s become quite sophisticated in the past few years, so much so that facilities dedicated to the experience, like VIRTUALITIES (virtualities.co) in Gateway, are now opening. There are more than 20 games from which to choose at many locations that allow you to explore mountain ranges, venture into space, and become a soldier in fully immersive scenarios that give players an hour in a variety of games for about $25 per person.

Fitness Challenges My guy and I participate in the Rugged Maniac race every summer — it’s a great workout with a lot of teamwork and even more laughs — and we sign up for other fitness challenges when we’re feeling

MARCH 2018 |

A&E | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 45

ISSUE 277 | Qsaltlake.com

competitive, like the UTAH UNDIE RUN (utahundierun. com) a pantless party. That’s reason enough for us.

Period Dress for a Road Trip in a Classic Car Get dressed like you’re going to a sock hop, rent a ’57 Chevy from DRIVESHARE (driveshare.com), and roll into an unexplored town like you just drove through a hole in the space-time continuum. You’ll turn a few heads for sure.

Campy Camping Upscale camping becomes even more accessible thanks to companies like CONESTOGA RANCH (conestogaranch.com) at Bear Lake,

which helps wanderlusters find the beyond-cool accommodations they never knew they wanted. There’s also the hippy-owned MYSTIC HOT SPRINGS (mystichotsprings.com) in Monroe, Utah where you can stay in a true pioneer cabin or a converted hippie school bus and soak in the hot springs. If you prefer a little more luxury and filth in your vacay, check into Club Getaway’s CAMP JOHN WATERS (clubgetaway.com/campjohnwaters2018) (there’s currently a waitlist), offering a weekend in the woods of Kent, Conn. with everyone’s favorite pencil-’stached homo-con and featuring activities like Hairspray karaoke, burlesque lessons, a JW film marathon and a one-man show from Mr. Counter Culture himself.

Mikey Rox is an award-winning journalist and LGBT lifestyle expert whose work has been published in more than 100 outlets across the world. He lives with his dog Jaxon. Connect with Mikey on Twitter @ mikeyrox

What Life Does To Your Body,

We undo!

29

INITIAL VISIT

INCLUDING CONSULTATION, EXAM & ADJUSTMENT

Sugar House

Winner

1126 E 2100 S – 801.467.8683

2013 – 2017

Mon – Fri: 9 – 7 Sat & Sun: 9 – 5

“Best Chiropractic Clinic”

Fabby Awards

Open 7 Days a Week – No Appointments Needed

www.thejoint.com

*Offer valid for first visit only. Initial visit includes consultation, exam and adjustment.

Please present offer at the time of redemption. © 2017 The Joint Corp.

saltlakecitychiropractor-thejoint.com

46 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FINAL WORD

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 277 |

MARCH 2018

the perils of petunia pap smear

The tale of a bridezilla wedding reception

BY PETUNIA PAP SMEAR

The road

to a wedding reception is fraught with danger and excitement.

In last month’s issue, we left our wedding saga just as the average wedding gets fun. The wedding breakfast, the reception, the gifts, the refreshments.

Leading up to the wedding day, our pre-existing anniversary had been December 28. The past 24 years, we have disliked this date as an anniversary because it always gets lost amongst the holidays. We said that if we ever got married, we would choose a date in the summer that would be a better day to celebrate. Well, events being what they were, we exchanged December 28 for December 23. Not an improvement.

We had not had time to invite any of our family members to come to the marriage ceremony. So after we left the courthouse, we had only 90 minutes before Mr. Pap Smear needed to go to work.

Feeling the need to somehow celebrate, on the drive back to Kaysville we stopped at Lorena’s Mexican Restaurant in Bountiful for a plate of enchiladas, which was our wedding breakfast, as it were. We got home, and my new husband went to work, leaving me alone on our wedding night.

Gene Geiber and Jesse Dowhaniuk, owners of Club Try-Angles and Off Trax Café, also were married amongst the throng at the courthouse. Gene decided to throw a wedding reception at Club Try-Angles for all the newlyweds, so he

7pm, February 16 First Baptist Church, 777 S 1300 E fb.me/matronsofmayhem

prodded Dennis McCracken to round up wedding cakes. Dennis reported that he purchased the last two sheet cakes he could find in town, which both happened to be birthday cakes. They scraped off the ‘Happy Birthday’ wishes and added a wedding greeting. I received a phone call informing me of the reception at Try-Angles and decided that, even though my new husband was absent, (he works a swing shift and doesn’t get home until 2 a.m.), I would attend.

When I arrived, there were about three other newlywed couples and a bunch of boys prancing about in their underwear. (I think it might have been underwear night at the bar.) Being without my husband, David Willeitner decided to assign a “temporary surrogate husband” for me. He snatched a passing cute twink boy (name omitted to protect the innocent) wearing nothing but his underwear to be my husband-of the-moment. That way, I at least would have someone to feed cake to when it came time for the ritual.

It was a lovely little party. Until the cake was cut, and it quickly turned into a food fight. I hid in the corner, while I quietly ate my cake. Then I went home.

The next day was Christmas Eve. We drove a short distance to Ogden Canyon where the grandkids and extended family were celebrating Christmas. As we approached the house, the three grandchildren came out onto the front porch and to throw rice at us. The 8-year-old grandson didn’t understand the concept of tossing wedding rice, as he flung it as if it was a weapon of last resort, defending the homestead. It hit like buckshot. Bless his heart!

On Jan. 11, 2014, QSaltLake, along with Le Croissant Catering, X96, and UtahGayWeddings.com, threw a big wedding reception at the Rail Events Center to raise money for the legal bills the marriage court case had accumulated. It was indeed the fabulous party I had always dreamed of having. The wedding cake was a structure to be awed.

The entertainment was phenomenal.

I wore a silver princess gown, with lighted fiber optic breasticles, flaming beehive wig,

and glowing angel earrings. I remember it darkly lit in the banquet hall. So as I approached the buffet table with my bright lights, I illuminated the banquet table for many revelers. In fact, a few people asked me to hang around and pass by the table occasionally so they could see the food to reload their plates. So, being the service-oriented queen that I am, I paraded up and down the buffet table lighting the way for all.

In the weeks following, Gov. Herbert refused to let the State of Utah recognize our weddings. So, each month at Drag Queen Bingo, I chose a temporary surrogate husband and took a photo to see if the governor would approve of this one. I had 13 temporary husbands before Mr. Pap Smear and I became official.

This story leaves us with several important questions: 1. Are cheese enchiladas a typical wedding fare in Mexico?

2. If you spend your wedding night alone, should you binge-watch the Home Alone movies or The Bridges of Madison County?

3. Is feeding wedding cake to your new spouse supposed to be done with violent force?

4. Does the fact that I hid in the corner to eat my cake say that I’m a coward, hungry, or worried about smearing my make-up?

5. Was it my urge to serve that urged me to illuminate the buffet table, or was it that “Buffet” should have been my middle name and I’ve never met a buffet I could ignore?

6. Are my lighted breasticles where the song, “This Little Light of Mine” comes from?

7. Does the fact that I accumulated 13 temporary surrogate husbands mean I’m a closet polygamist, or that I can’t pass by a cute boy without making advances?

8. Is that why Joseph Smith instituted polygamy?

These and other eternal questions will be answered in future chapters of The Perils of Petunia Pap Smear. Q

MARCH 2018 |

ISSUE 277 | Qsaltlake.com

NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 47

9

SEXY SPECIALS FOR SPRING LOSE THE BELLY FAT

Before

After

Before

After

Utah’s most experienced CoolSculpting® clinic Free Laser Hair Removal Membership or 30 units of FREE Xeomin with any package purchase Expires March 31, 2018

IPL

K YBELL A ®

Before

Before

Get Rid of Double Chin

After

199

$

(Limit 1 per person)

After

*Minimum 2 vials/treatment

$ Reg. $300

Expires March 31, 2018

375/Vial* Expires March 31, 2018

Reg. $595/vial

BOTOX

9.50/UNIT* 8.50/UNIT* $ 7.50/UNIT* $ $

After

Before

*25 Unit Min.

Expires March 31, 2018

ULTHER APY NON-SURGICAL LIFTING CHOOSE ANY AREA: NECK, JAWLINE, BROW, CHEEKS, EYELIDS

with purchase of 1 syringe of filler. with purchase of 2 syringes of filler or Kybella

LASER HAIR REMOVAL 1 Area

2 Areas

3 Areas

29/MO 49/MO 69/MO

$

$

$

$49 Enrollment fee waived

30% OFF 20% OFF

SKIN CARE

Expires March 31, 2018

JUVÉDERM®

Expires March 31, 2018

Molly Mears, MD 801-294-9999

VOLUMA

Before

After

After

Before

$

529

Reg. $595 /syringe

/syringe

Expires March 31, 2018

1560 S. Renaissance Towne Dr, Ste 102, Bountiful enlightenlaser.com | facebook.com/EnlightenUtah/

629* Per Syringe

$

Reg. $695/syringe Expires March 31, 2018