QSaltLake Magazine - Issue 319 - January 2021

JANUARY 2021 VOL. 18 • ISSUE 319 QSALTLAKE.COM

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LGBTQ people helping to maintain community in the face of a pandemic YEAR IN REVIEW • RAINBOW FLAG IN SCHOOL • FEDERAL COURT STRIKES CONVERSION THERAPY BAN

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We're back. And we're bringing friends.

Park City Institute presents

Spring | Summer 2021 Complexions Dance April 17

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news The top national and world news since last issue you should know

BY CRAIG OGAN

New president’s promise The incoming presidential administration ran on a platform with many LGBT planks. The Associated Press published this compendium of promises: • Lift near-total ban on military service for transgender people.

• Bar federal contractors from anti-LGBT job discrimination.

• Create high-level LGBTrights positions at the State Department, the National Security Council, and other federal agencies.

• Change policies containing religious exemptions allowing LGBT discrimination by social service agencies, health care providers, adoption and foster care agencies and others.

• Reinstate guidance directing public schools to allow transgender students to access bathrooms, locker rooms, and sports teams in accordance with their gender identity.

• Put federal resources behind efforts to help curtail violence against transgender people, particularly transgender women of color.

• Support legislative efforts to ban so-called conversion therapy for LGBT minors.

• Add questions to collect comprehensive data about LGBT through the census and other federal surveys.

• Make LGBT rights a priority for U.S. foreign policy.

Straight-washing Chopin A radio show, “Chopin’s Men,” that aired on Swiss public

Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 319 | JANUARY, 2021

broadcaster SRF’s arts channel revealed Frédéric Chopin’s homosexual attractions have been deliberately overlooked by biographers and archivists. Though he didn’t live in Poland for most of his life, he is claimed by that country as its greatest composer. Music journalist Moritz Weber says a lot of his personal history has been deliberately straight-washed by Poland, a notoriously anti-gay place. The journalist analyzed 22 letters Chopin wrote to a school and found homoerotic language.

Chopin also said reports of his romances with various female artists and musicians are meant as a cover-up. Weber reported some letters that said the composer-pianist enjoyed ‘cottaging’ – looking for sex partners in public toilets.

Laverne Cox’s transphobic dust-up Laverne Cox said she and a friend were accosted in Los Angeles’ Griffith Park in a transphobic encounter that turned violent. She and a companion passed a man who “very aggressively” asked for the time. After her friend gave him the time, the man asked, “Guy or girl?’” Cox’s friend answered with an obscenity and Cox reports, “The guy is hitting my friend.” Cox did not call the police, but did take to Instagram and texted her therapist to help “process the incident.” Cox said “I’ve been harassed and bullied my whole life. Living in fear is not a good thing.”

‘Prom’ not Corden’s best The latest Ryan Murphy Netflix production, The Prom got pretty good reviews for its adaptation of the Broadway musical. Meryl Streep and Nicole Kidman are getting raves, but co-star James Corden has not. He is cast as a gay man and goes too over-thetop, according to critics. In the ongoing debate about straight actors playing gay roles, it’s

not a good look. The show is about a group of stereotypically portrayed self-obsessed theater stars showing up at a small conservative Indiana town to support a high school girl who wants to take her girlfriend to the prom. One critic of Corden wrote, “It’s one of the worst film performances of the 21st century.” Another called the performance “gross and offensive, the worst gayface in a long, long time. It’s horrifically bad.” It started on Netflix on December 11. Check it out.

Trouble at lesbian bars It appears lesbian bars are going out of business at a rapid clip.

In the 1980s there were 200 bars in the USA that catered to lesbians. According to the “Lesbian Bar Project,” while there are more than 63,000 bars across America today, only 15 of them are of the lesbian type. Alabama has as many as California: one each. Texas has two. New York has three.

13 years of ‘Drag Race’ Really, has it been 13 years?

VH1 has unveiled the new queens of RuPaul’s Drag Race for season 13, which premiers on January 1, 2021. The cast includes Denali, Elliott With 2 Ts, Joey Jay, Kahmora Hall, Kandy Muse, LaLa Ri, Olivia Lux, Rosé, Symone, Tamisha Iman, Tina Burner, Utica Queen, and Gottmik, the first out trans man to compete on the reality competition. Contestants vie for the title of America’s Next Drag Superstar and $100,000. RuPaul referenced the COVID-19 pandemic in a statement, “Competing safely and fiercely, our 13 queens proved that it takes more than a global pandemic to keep a good queen down.”

Maybe Ambassador Pete Chief of staff, nope. HUD Secretary, nope. UN Ambassador, nope. Out former presidential candidate Pete Buttigieg has been

practically guaranteed a place in the next presidential administration but has had a hard time being slotted. He’s been considered for many Cabinet-level positions but hasn’t made the final cut as the administration prioritizes women and people of color for high-level positions. News reports that the one-time Army guy and mayor of South Bend, Indiana, is being considered for ambassador to China

Polish LGBT Free Zones French European Affairs Minister Clément Beaune announced he’ll visit Poland’s “LGBT free” zones in support of activists.

One-third of Polish Cities have declared themselves “LGBTfree” zones. The Polish government supports towns that have lost EU funding because of this discriminatory policy. Beaune had previously called LGBT-ideology free zones, “an absolute scandal.” Beaune has not previously mentioned his sexual orientation in media interviews.

But he said in the interview: “I’m gay, and I’m happy with that.”

Gabbard’s daddy’s issues Rep. Tulsi Gabbard was one of the gang of 30 running for the 2020 Democratic presidential nomination. She skyrocketed to fame when Hillary Clinton called her a “Russian asset.”

Her father led a 2004 effort in Hawaii against allowing civil unions and she helped, decrying “homosexual extremists.” So, it’s not unusual that as a member of Congress she would offer legislation that would amend Title IX of the Education Amendments of 1972 to require that, “sex shall be determined on the basis of biological sex as determined at birth by a physician,” as it relates to high school sports.

What is unusual is she is leaving Congress at the end of this term and the legislation has been referred to a committee in the House of Representatives which is controlled by Democrats. The legislation is going nowhere. Q

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Court strikes down bans on conversion therapy as violations of free speech

BY CHRIS JOHNSON

A federal appeals court issued a major blow against bans on conversion therapy for youth by ruling they violate the First Amendment, setting up a split within the judiciary that could lead the U.S. Supreme Court to adjudicate the issue on a nationwide basis.

In a 2–1 decision written by U.S. Circuit Judge Britt Grant, a three-judge panel on the U.S. Eleventh Circuit Court of Appeals in Atlanta determined municipal bans on conversion therapy for youth in the cities of Boca Raton and Palm Beach in Florida contravene the freedom of speech under the First Amendment.

“We understand and appreciate that the therapy is highly controversial,” Grant writes. “But the First Amendment has no carveout for controversial speech. We hold that the challenged ordinances violate the First Amendment because they are content-based regulations of speech that cannot survive strict scrutiny.”

Joining Grant in the opinion was U.S. Circuit Judge Barbara Lagoa, both of whom are Trump-appointed judges. Logoa was on the short-list of President Trump’s potential choices to replace the late U.S. Associate Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg on the Supreme Court before he ended up choosing Amy Coney Barrett.

Grant takes pain to show bans on conversion therapy should be subject to strict scrutiny because they are content-based restrictions, and neither the local government’s insistence their professional regulations nor claims the speech is actually conduct can lower that bar.

“The First Amendment does not protect the right to speak about banned speech; it protects speech itself, no matter how disagreeable that speech might be to the government,” Grant writes. “And what good would it do for a therapist whose client sought SOCE therapy to tell the client that she thought the therapy could be helpful, but could not offer it? It only matters that some words about sexuality and gender are allowed, and others are not.”

The practice of therapy aimed at changing an individual’s sexual orientation or transgender status is considered ineffectual at best and harmful at worst. Major medical and psychological institutions, including the American Psychological Association, the World Health Organization, the American Medical Association and the American

Academy of Pediatrics, widely reject conversion therapy.

Dissenting to the opinion was U.S. Circuit Judge Beverly Martin, an Obama appointee who concluded the majority’s opinion on freedom of speech is off the mark.

“The majority is correct to say this case implicates sensitive considerations about when and how government bodies may regulate speech,” Martin writes. “Instances in which a speech restriction is narrowly tailored to serve a compelling interest are deservedly rare. But they do exist. I believe the localities’ narrow regulation of a harmful medical practice affecting vulnerable minors falls within the narrow band of permissibility.”

Because of the 11th Circuit decision, any state or municipality within the jurisdiction — which constitutes Alabama, Georgia and Florida — would be unable to enact bans on conversion therapy. Moreover, existing bans on conversion therapy in Florida — which exist in around two dozen municipalities, including Miami, Tampa and Wilton Manors — are unconstitutional.

Kevin Jennings, CEO of the LGBT legal group Lambda Legal, condemned the decision in a statement as “a marked departure from precedent and an incredibly dangerous decision for our youth.”

“So-called ‘conversion therapy’ is nothing less than child abuse,” Jennings said. “It poses documented and proven critical health risks, including depression, shame, decreased self-esteem, social withdrawal, substance abuse, self-harm and suicide. Youth are often subjected to these practices at the insistence of parents who don’t know or don’t believe that the efforts are harmful and doomed to fail: when these efforts predictably fail to produce the expected result, many LGBTQ children are kicked out of their homes.”

Jennings also pointed out the ruling came from Trump-appointed judges, accusing the Trump administration of having packed the judiciary at a time when progressives are calling for the expansion of the court under the Biden administration, which has been criticized by the other side as an attempt at court packing.

“We fear that today’s decision may be the tip of the iceberg in terms of the harm that may come from a federal judiciary that has been packed for the last four years with dangerous ideologues,” Jennings said. “The damage done by this misguided opinion is in-

calculable and puts young people in danger.”

Robert Otto and Julie Hamilton, who have engaged in conversion therapy with minors in Florida despite warnings against the practice, had challenged the municipal ordinances in the litigation and were represented by the Liberty Counsel, an anti-LGBTQ legal group.

Mat Staver, chair of the Liberty Counsel, hailed the decision and predicted similar rulings would follow.

“This is a huge victory for counselors and their clients to choose the counsel of their choice free of political censorship from government ideologues,” Staver said. “This case is the beginning of the end of similar unconstitutional counseling bans around the country.”

Utah is in the 10th Circuit as is Colorado, both of which ban conversion therapy.

The Eleventh Circuit decision creates a split among circuit courts on the constitutionality of bans on conversion therapy. The U.S. Third Circuit Court of Appeals and the U.S. Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals have previously upheld these bans as constitutional.

The spilt among the circuits on the issue may prompt the Supreme Court to take up the issue to resolve the constitutional issue on a nationwide basis — provided the municipalities submit a petition for review.

Shannon Minter, legal director of the National Center for Lesbian Rights, discouraged via email to the Washington Blade any attempt to call for resolution of the issue before Supreme Court, which now has a 6-3 conservative majority as a result of Trump-appointed picks.

“I do not think this issue is ripe for Supreme Court review,” Minter said. “Today’s ruling is an outlier by two Trump-appointed judges. As the dissent points out, the decision is not well grounded in precedent and ignores what the dissent rightly describes as a “mountain of rigorous evidence” that conversion therapy puts minors at risk of serious harms.”

Minter urged the municipalities to take another course of action, saying “because the majority opinion here is so off track, seeking en banc review would be more appropriate than seeking Supreme Court review.”

Equality Utah, in a statement, said, “We are grateful that Utah’s law is based on a broad mountain of scientific evidence and has bipartisan support, including Gov. Herbert, Gov.-elect Cox and the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.” Q Story courtesy of the Washington Blade with local edits by Michael Aaron.

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ISSUE 319 | JANUARY, 2021

Moutsos targets LGBTQ, BLM flags in Rose Park school You might remember the name Eric Moutsos as being the Salt Lake City Police Department motorcycle officer who resigned from his position rather than participate in the Utah Pride Parade in 2015.

Today, he is an ardent Trump supporter and runs protests against masks, quarantine measures, and the recently distributed Coronavirus vaccine.

He also is against anything to do with the Black Lives Matters movement and having rainbow flags in Utah schools.

“These flags are flying at Rose Park Elementary School in SLC, Utah,” Moutsos wrote on his Facebook wall alongside photos of a rainbow flag and a Black

Lives Matters flag. “I called the Principal, Nicole OBrien, and spoke to her for about 10 minutes just now. Yes it’s true.

I had a decent conversation about the consequences of the flags. I tried to show her where this road leads. I explained to her as a former Salt Lake City Police officer, flying these flags for little kids is very divisive and dangerous for those who disagree with the messages politically or religiously. And the kids do not need this in school of all places.”

OBrien, he says, replied that “we represent all people,” and “This is a safe space.”

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Moutsos asked OBrien if he could bring “a straight pride flag, or a Christian flag with a cross, or a [sic] All Lives Matter flag.”

“What about a Blue Lives Matter flag?

Would a police officers [sic] child feel safe walking under a flag which organization chants ‘F the police’ ?? How inclusive is this really? Don’t All Lives Matter?

Or just certain lives?” he continued.

Moutsos said that the principal sounded like a nice person and encouraged his ultra-conservative followers to contact her directly. He said he would continue

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to push for the removal of the flags until he found that they were removed.

Commenters said that the flags were temporarily removed, but were put back up after the principal and the school board backed them being displayed.

Abigail Riley, daughter of principal OBrien, posted a photo of the flags and an explanation of her mother’s motivations.

“My mom, who is the principal at Rose Park Elementary, recently put up a Black Lives Matter flag and updated her pride flag to recognize trans and bipoc inclusivity,” she wrote on her Instagram wall.

“Her words: ‘It’s all about the tiny humans that walk through the door. They need to feel included and loved.’”

“This decision has received pushback from people who I’d rather not give voice to,”

Riley continued. “Her voicemail and email are subject to constant notifications; some in complete support and some fervently against these flags.”

Riley said that the Salt Lake School District supports the display of the flags and that other educators and former students are excited that the flags are represented at the school.

“I could go on for a while about my mother. She is truly passionate about anti-racist work and her students and is constantly working to make the school a safe space for all,” Riley said. “But she wishes to be decentered from this conversation, as she is only a vessel and not the originator of these ideas.”

She asked people to consider what the “simple gesture of a flag where someone sees themselves represented might do to foster a feeling of safety and inclusivity.” Q

‘Shame’ and ‘Disgusting’ chants target Utah’s ‘Lady MAGA’ at DC rally Salt Lake’s own Ryan Woods, whose Trump-supporting drag personae known as ‘Lady MAGA’, was the target of “shame” and “disgusting” chants while speaking at the supposed Million Maga March in Washington, D.C. on Dec. 13.

Video on social media shows MAGA supporters and many in the Fuentes’ “groyper” movement, chanting “Shame! Shame!

Shame!” and a man with a megaphone yelling “That’s disgusting” during the performer’s speech.

“I am a proud patriot, constitutionalist, and a free American standing up for my country,” Lady MAGA tweeted in response to the coverage. “These

people (especially ‘Tiny Tim [Nick Fuentes]) are just sad.’”

Woods claims that the response to his Lady MAGA character has been very positive overall at Trump rallies.

Other social media posts point out that Lady MAGA called a Rose Park Elementary School principal to complain she displays the rainbow and Black Lives Matter flags.

“You need to make phone calls when you see this kind of ridiculousness,” Woods said on a Twitter video.

He introduced himself as a “concerned citizen of Salt Lake City.”

“I’m gay, but I don’t think that a rainbow flag is an appropriate flag to fly outside of an American elementary school” Woods said before calling the flag “leftist, political radicalism.” Q

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Provo school board passes transgender nondiscrimination policy The Provo City School District Board of Education voted unanimously to direct the superintendent to “develop policies and procedures to address gender inclusivity” within the school system which “afford the rights of all persons [to] a respectful school and work environment.”

“Discrimination because of gender identity, or because of transgender status, including sexual orientation, is discrimination based on sex and violates Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964, as well as Title IX of the Education Amendments of 1972,” the policy states.

Provo High School teacher and club director for the school’s Gay-Straight Alliance was first to address the school board at their Dec. 8 meeting.

“I wanted to come to be a voice for the LGBTQ students in our district. These students have shared their intense struggles with me, and I take my role as their advocate extremely seriously. For many of you, these students may be vague and nondescript, but for me they are not just an LGBTQ student in our district — they are an individual.

They have their own sense of humor, their own interests

and dreams for their future.”

“LGBTQ students epitomize the students without a voice. These students don’t feel safe to speak for themselves because many of them are at risk for ostracization, humiliation, and often selfharm, potentially leading to suicide,” she continued. “The gender inclusion policy discussed is a huge, massive step in the right direction for our district. It will take a step in a longer and much-needed discussion in our district about how to support the social and emotional well-being of our diverse and at-risk students.”

“It is imperative for our LGBTQ students to feel safe at school; safe to express themselves; safe to use the bathroom where they feel the most comfortable; safe from not having their deadname plastered on the board when there’s a new seating chart in class; and safe from, most of all, bullying and humiliation,” she continued. “This policy has the potential to save lives.”

Kimberly House, a parent of a transgender child and chair of the school district’s LGBTQ Equity and Diversity Committee, presented the board a letter from over 180 people saying that the educa-

tion of teachers is key.

“When I asked for my child to be able to use preferred names in school, I was told no,” she said. “As I pushed forward, my child was the first to be able to use their preferred name in school.”

“I’ve had to hospitalize my child twice. They are at high risk and we are losing them,” she said.

School board member Jennifer Partridge was glad that the board was considering what she called an important policy.

“All of our students need to feel seen and known, and everyone needs to be treated with respect and dignity,” she said.

The board went on to pass the policy unanimously.

Planet Transgender journalist Kelli Busey reached out to the school superintendent and other district leaders to find what the next steps are, and have found that they are not sure when spelling out procedures will happen.

Salt Lake City School District has put similar policies into place and it is suggested that the district can look to those as a guideline.

The policy approved, in full:

GENDER-INCLUSIVE SCHOOLS The Board of Education values diversity amongst its students and employees. As such, the board recognizes a need to adopt a gender-inclusive policy that will address the rights of all individuals,

regardless of sex, sexual orientation, and gender identity, to equal treatment under the law with regard to learning and/or work environments.

The board directs the superintendent to develop policies and procedures to address gender inclusivity within Provo City schools and afford the rights of all persons [to] a respectful school and work environment.

Discrimination because of gender identity, or because of transgender status, including sexual orientation, is discrimination based on sex and violates Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964, as well as Title IX of the Education Amendments of 1972.

This policy is developed in conjunction with existing policies that address the prohibition of harassment, discrimination, hazing, and bullying. It is expected, regardless of gender, gender identity, gender expression, or sex, that the district create and maintain safe, civil, and inclusive learning communities. Therefore, employees of the district will be required to monitor and maintain safe learning environments and ensure all students are treated fairly and are respected as individuals within the overall learning community.

Employee awareness training will be included within the procedure implementation to ensure school environments are gender-inclusive and safe for all students. Q

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FIRST OPEN LGBTQ MISS USA CONTESTANT

PERSON

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DECADE

MISS UTAH USA 2020

Mark Lawrence Founder, Restore Our Humanity

DECADE IN REVIEW • QUEER GUIDE TO SUNDANCE • THANKFUL FOR HIS T WO DADS

2a2L IN REVIEW

To say the year 2020 was ­extraordinary is a massive understatement. Here is our wrap-up of news we covered through the year affecting Utah’s LGBTQ community.

JANUARY, 2020 Mark Lawrence is QSaltLake’s ‘Person of the Decade’

S A ME-SE X W EDDINGS • Q UEER L OUNGE AT SUNDA NCE • U TA H HIGH SCHOOL S T UDEN T BUL L IED

PE T E BU T T IGIEG COMES T O SL C • BIL L S AT U TA H L EGISL AT URE • GENDERB A NDS’ PURPL E SOIRÉE

in eastern Utah, “Greatest Sex on Earth” mimicking a phrase on Utah license plates, and “This is the Place” featuring a graphic of a bed, people began collecting them and talking about them.

The campaign’s website, HIVandMe.com, was also temporarily pulled but is live today.

Utah Harm Reduction Coalition recreated the campaign with similar artwork in December and sold them as “crates” of six designs to help promote and fund their efforts.

Utah’s Division of Occupational and Professional Licensing and Gov. Gary Herbert adopted new rules to prohibit any state-licensed therapist from practicing conversion therapy with minors. This means they will not be allowed to encourage a child to change their sexual orientation or gender identity in any way or give the child hope they can change themselves.

A legislative bill by Rep. Craig Hall was hijacked in 2019 by conversion therapy proponents and watered down so far as to make it dangerous. Hall asked the body to kill the bill.

Utah’s Miss USA contestant is the first out bisexual to compete

Mark Lawrence had a dream: “I wanted to bring gay marriage to Utah.” No one, including those who ultimately became the plaintiffs in the case, though it was possible.

And no one thought he was the man to get it done. Yet because of his hard work, a federal judge in 2013 overturned all of Utah’s marriage laws, including a constitutional amendment, that restricted marriage to only between a man and a woman.

The first LGBTQ contestant in the 68 years of the Miss USA pageant was Miss Utah USA’s Rachel Slawson. The 25-year-old, who competed as Miss Park City, won the title on her fifth try on Jan. 19.

While she didn’t place in the competition, aired in November at Elvis Presley’s Graceland in Memphis, Tn., she said she was proud to be a contestant who “was a reflection of people like me.”

Slawson was open about her bisexuality and her diagnosis of bipolar disorder.

Condoms offend the governor, so he pulls out

Chris Wharton elected Salt Lake City Council Chair

Saying he didn’t want Utah taxpayer money paying for condom packages that twist Utah landmarks and sayings into sexual innuendos, Gov. Gary Herbert pulled over 100,000 condoms, a website, and a billboard campaign aimed at HIV prevention in the state.

The campaign started out a hit. Many places ran out of the first stash before the governor had them pulled only an hour before the media announce them.

With such twists on the Utah vernacular as “Uintah Sex?” referencing the county

A day after Erin Mendenhall was sworn in on the steps of the Salt Lake City-County Building, the Salt Lake City Council elected Councilman Chris Wharton, who represents District 3, Capitol Hill, Avenues, and Federal Heights, as its chair. The openly gay attorney leads the council through January 2021.

Utah bans conversion therapy Utah became the 19th state in the nation to protect minors from the practice of so-called “Conversion Therapy” on January 22.

FEBRUARY, 2020 BYU honor code change brings confusion to LGBTQ students LDS Church-owned Brigham Young University quietly dropped prohibitions of all forms of physical intimacy that give expression to homosexual feelings” from its 70+ page “honor code.”

Students held kiss-ins on campus to celebrate the change, but attempts by LGBTQ and ally students to get more definitive answers from BYU officials about whether students can date, hold hands and kiss in public were less than fruitful.

“Even though we have removed the more prescriptive language, the principles of the Honor Code remain the same,” BYU’s official Twitter account read shortly after the kiss-ins.

Utah’s surrogate law tweaked to allow gay male couples access Unconstitutional discriminatory language in a state law that could bar married gay male couples from using a surrogate to have a child was almost unanimously passed through both houses of the Utah legislature.

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MATRONS OF MAYHEM

Bring Drag Bingo and Fun to Salt Lake City to Raise Money for Charities PHOTO BY BRAD MONTGOMERY

CO V ID-19 A ND T HE L GB T Q COMMUNI T Y • U TA H PRIDE 2020 A BOU T L O V E A ND SUS TA IN A BIL I T Y

Rep. Patrice Arent’s HB234 was a fairly simple “housekeeping” bill that updated state law governing surrogacy contracts to comply with a recent unanimous opinion by the Utah Supreme Court.

The justices ruled in 2019 that one portion of the law was unconstitutional under the 14th Amendment’s equal protection and due process clauses because it allowed gestational agreements only if one of the parents is a woman, excluding same-sex male couples.

Sen. Lyle Hillyard was the lone dissenter on Utah’s Capitol Hill. The bill was signed on Mar. 24 by Utah Gov. Gary Herbert.

Utah man charged with hate crimes in attacks on gay man, black man A homeless man, Chad Brandon Phyfer, 46, was charged Feb. 27 with two counts of assault after prosecutors say he separately attacked two passersby with pepper spray near a public library in Salt Lake City, using a racial slur against an African American man and a homophobic slur against a gay man.

MARCH, 2020 Bill to study treatments for trans youth dies in the Utah House A bill that started as a Utah Eagle Forum attempt to ban gender corrective surgeries and hormone treatments for transgender youth failed by a wide margin in the Utah House. The bill was watered down to a study on the issue.

“This legislation started as a discriminatory ban on transgender healthcare and has now been defeated. We are grateful to Rep. Daw for compassionately hearing the stories of transgender youth. We look forward to continued dialogue with lawmakers on the healthcare needs of the transgender community,” Equality Utah said in a statement.

S TAY C ONNE C T E D D UR ING Q U A R A N T INE • P R ID E S A C R O S S T HE C OUN T R Y C A NC E L E D , MO V E D

Utah Gov. Gary Herbert declares a state of emergency in Utah over the Coronavirus on March 6.

SL man charged with rape, sexual assault on a woman to ‘fix the gay’ Salt Lake City police arrested a man after a woman accused him of raping and sexually assaulting her after saying he would “fix the gay.” The woman told police she is a lesbian, said she was visiting 34-year-old Adam Quinn Atwood and his wife in their Glendale home, and that the pair was intoxicated when she arrived. She claims Atwood assaulted her before she was able to escape in her car.

Atwood faces 11 felonies and was being held on a $750,000 bail, though Judge Kristine Johnson allowed him to be released from jail without bail and with no restrictions on contacting the alleged victim.

A 5.7 magnitude earthquake in Magna shakes much of the Wasatch Front on March 18.

Aftershocks lasted weeks.

APRIL, 2020 Logan Pride’s Crista Sorenson dies after suffering a stroke Crista Sorenson, known to most in Logan, Utah’s LGBT community as the driving force behind Logan Pride and the Logan Pride Center died Wednesday, April 1, a week after a massive stroke at the age of 44.

Sorenson was one of three original directors of the Logan Pride Foundation, which hosts the Logan Pride Festival and just this year opened the Logan Pride Center directly across the street from the Logan Tabernacle.

UTAH PRIDE • OGDEN PRIDE • PROVO PRIDE • LOGAN PRIDE • SO UTAH PRIDE • MOAB PRIDE

Utah Pride postponed, Utah Arts Festival canceled, UAF closed The Coronavirus pandemic caused the cancellation of many events across the state and the closure of many service industry businesses. The Utah Pride Center announced that the Utah Pride Festival and Parade, scheduled for June, would be postponed. The Utah Arts Festival canceled the 2020 event.

The Utah AIDS Foundation closed its doors and moved to online case management.

All events scheduled at the Utah Pride Center were also canceled, with some services moving to online meetings.

MAY, 2020 Utah Pride Center lays off much of its staff as donations slow As the Utah Pride Center’s largest fundraiser was postponed and, it turned out, did not happen in its normal way, leaders did what they call a “restructuring,” resulting in many layoffs of staff and a reduction of services.

Executive director Rob Moolman and the Center’s board of directors made this decision “out of an abundance of caution for the finances and long-term future of the Center,” he said.

Ten people were involved in this round of layoffs, leaving 15 people on staff.

Young nonbinary Salt Laker went missing on April 23. Still not located.

Eztli Atl Cortez Trujillo, 22, went missing on April 23. Trujillo’s vehicle was found crashed and abandoned on Ogden Canyon Road a mile west of the North Ogden Divide trailhead. Search parties in various areas revealed no clues and Trujillo remains missing at this time. More at https://linktr.ee/FindEz.

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LOVE, SIMON STAR

JUNE, 2020 Utah Pride Center announces second ‘restructuring’ After its first restructuring in May, the Utah Pride Center announced on June 10 a second round and a new vision for what their structure will look like moving forward in light of the global pandemic.

“We know that our world and our Center is not, and can never be, the same place that it was just a few months ago. Community spaces, like our Utah Pride Center, are all confronting this contemporary reality in different ways. One of the impacts of COVID-19 has been the need to carefully and deliberately consider the structure of the organization,” leaders wrote in a statement.

The announcement was not without controversy. Social media posts pointed to the staff reductions as retaliation against those who have raised concerns about how the Center is managed.

Thousands gather in Salt Lake for Black Lives Matter, LGBTQ rights rally All of June were Black Lives Matter protests after the death of George Floyd at the hands of Minneapolis police. On June 14, a week after the Utah Pride Parade should have happened, thousands of protesters assembled at Liberty Park and marched to Washington Square in support of LGBTQ and Black Lives Matter causes.

U.S. Supreme Court rules LGBTQ people are covered by the Civil Rights Act of 1964 The U.S. Supreme Court handed a major victory in the battle for LGBTQ rights as ruled gay and transgender Americans are

TRANS PRIDE • UTAH’S OUT PRINCIPAL OF THE YEAR • UTAH PRIDE CENTER • BOB THE DRAG QUEEN

protected from employment discrimination under federal law. While Utah had its own employment nondiscrimination act that covered sexual and gender minorities, the ruling granted the same protections across the country. “[The ruling] offers sweeping but fundamentally important protections to LGBTQ Americans. No longer can someone be fired or evicted from their home just because they’re LGBTQ,” said Clifford Rosky, a professor of Law at the University of Utah.

Rosky said the ruling was the “most important and significant victory in the history of the LGBT movement.”

Utah-raised trans man competes in The Rock’s ‘Titan Games’ Fourteen years after The Deseret Morning News declared a 6’2” 170-pound Mountain View High School athlete “Ms. Basketball,” that athlete stood on a platform, ready to compete before 3.8 million viewers in the Titan Games, hosted by Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson. This time as Mitch Harrison — the first transgender man to compete on the show.

The News reported how “little girls were telling her they wanted to be like her some day.” Now, according to Harrison, the stories from media across the world may now be writing how trans people want to be like him some day.

While Harrison didn’t take home the title, he did get the admiration and pride from Johnson, who said, “Here’s a snapshot of what the world could and should be one day — embracing, supporting, and loving all people.”

PHOTO: CLIFFORD PRINCE KING

DAMN THESE HEELS QUEER FILM FESTIVAL • VOTER GUIDE • PRIDE CENTER RESTRUCTURES AGAIN

PHOTO: NBC UNIVERSAL

BLACK LIVES MATTER TO BE CENTER STAGE JUNE 27 AT GLOBAL PRIDE 2020

KEIYNAN LONSDALE TALKS ‘RAINBOW BOY’ AND EMBRACING HIS BLACK QUEER IDENTITY

UTAH PRIDE 2.O ANNOUNCED • ANTI-TRANS YEARBOOK MESSAGE • LDS LEADER APOLOGIZES TO LGBTQ

JULY, 2020 Damn These Heels Film Festival went online The Utah Film Center’s Damn These Heels Film Festival moved to a streaming format because of the Coronavirus. Attendees were able to view the entire festival safely from their own homes. The festival presented 23 feature films, four shorts programs, and even a drive-in theater experience.

Openly gay Utah County commissioner ousted at convention A Republican county commissioner in one of the most conservative counties in the county was voted out of office in a primary after coming out as gay. Nathan Ivie says a backlash during the campaign has him questioning whether his party has a place for him.

While he believes his sexuality played a role in his loss, his vote in favor of a contentious property tax increase became a key issue in the race. He lost by over 20 points.

Former LDS Church official issues apology to LGBTQ people Mormon mental health professional Dr. Allen E. Bergin issued an apology in July for his part in perpetuating anti-LGBTQ teachings in his roles with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. He also called upon other church members, fellow psychologists, and political leaders to “apologize and compensate [LGBTQ people] who have been afflicted by our treatment of them when they should have been embraced and loved.”

“To the general public, I say — Stop.

Listen. Learn. Love. To myself, my posterity, my colleagues, my fellow church members, and my political leaders, I say — apologize

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PROJECT RAINBOW brings LGBTQ Pride statewide

AWARDS COVID EDITION

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A TRIBUTE TO

UTAH PRIDE OFFICIAL GUIDE TO

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SHOTS FIRED AT SLC LGBTQ BAR • ELECTION ENDORSEMENTS • UTAH’S SUICIDE PREVENTION PLAN

and compensate those of God’s children who have been afflicted by our treatment of them when they should have been embraced and loved. Give them their rightful place in society and in the church so they may be nurtured and progress in their spiritual, social, and professional lives.”

AUGUST, 2020 Ogden waiter receives tip with ‘Get Out of America, Fag!’ written on it An Ogden man got an extraordinary tip during his shift at an Ogden restaurant. But not extraordinary in a good way. On the five-dollar bill was scrawled, “Get out of America, Fag!” “I got this tip today while serving an older couple and their middle-aged son. They were all wearing Trump 2020 hats,” Ashton Bindrup posted on his Facebook wall alongside two photos of the bill. “I can’t imagine hating someone enough to go out of my way to write a slur on the tip I’m going to give them.”

Heber City limits types of banners on city poles because of LGBTQ flags The Heber City Council voted unanimously to limit what banners can adorn poles on city streets after community members complained about Pride banners being flown a second year. New rules allow for banners celebrating state and federal holidays, but others require city manager approval and can only be requested by Heber City, Wasatch County, and Heber Valley Chamber of Commerce. Events must be “nonprofit and nonpolitical.”

Dozens of cars took place in a “Heber Main Street Rainbow car cruise of ally vehicles to show support for our town’s LGBTQ population” on Sunday, Aug. 23.

JOE REDBURN AND A CALL TO ARMS BY

PINK PISTOLS

VOTING GUIDE • ANTI-TRANSGENDER VIOLENCE • ANTI-LGBTQ NEIGHBORHOOD LETTER GOES VIRAL

Sen. Lee pushes to waive LGBTQ anti-discrimination laws for faithbased adoptions, foster care The Joint Economic Committee chaired by Utah Sen. Mike Lee issued a report saying his bill exempting faith-based organizations from LGBTQ anti-discrimination laws could help boost foster and adoption services.

Some churches, he says, stopped offering adoption or foster services in states where sexual orientation and gender identity laws would require them to place children with same-sex couples, which conflict with their religious beliefs.

SEPTEMBER, 2020 Encircle staffer arrested on child porn charges Tyler Domgaard, a staffer at Encircle, an LGBTQ+ youth and family resource and recipient of Genderbands’ 2020 volunteer of the year award, reportedly admitted to a special agent that he downloaded and reposted child pornography on his Twitter account, which authorities were tipped off to by the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children.

“We have comprehensive safety policies and procedures in place at our houses, and we perform background checks on all personnel (employees or volunteers) who interact with our guests,” Encircle leaders wrote in a statement. “We are conducting a thorough review of these policies and procedures and are committed to making improvements where appropriate.”

Utah Suicide project releases plan The Utah Suicide Prevention Coalition released a new plan that provides a first-of-its-kind road map to reducing suicide rates among the state’s

Holiday Gift Guide

W OR L D A IDS D AY • L GB T Q E L E C T ION R E SULT S • T HE S A F E T Y L E SSONS OF P OR N

vulnerable LGBTQ+ community.

The most significant area for improvement, the report reveals, is a need for better education among health care providers about LGBTQ+ individuals, their particular health needs, and the barriers they face in accessing care, said Ray Bailey, co-chair of the Utah Suicide Prevention Coalition’s LGBTQ+ Work Group.

OCTOBER, 2020 Utah Pride 2.0 Road Rally held on National Coming Out Day Due to the pandemic, the Utah Pride Center had to get creative this year to keep the center’s life-saving programs and services available to the LGBTQ+ community. Keeping social distancing and state guidelines in mind, the Center worked with Salt Lake City and the Utah Department of Health to organize PRIDE 2.0.

Rather than decorated floats and tens of thousands of people packed into seven downtown blocks, everyone in the community — LGBTQ+ and allies — was invited to decorate their vehicles and bikes and join in the Road Rally on a long stretch of Main Street.

Sandy neighborhood receives anti-rainbow flag letter An anonymous letter was sent around a Sandy community by “neighbors and ward members” saying that rainbow flags planted on front lawns in the neighborhood were “concerning to many of us.”

However, those in the neighborhood say that the letter was likely delivered by one disgruntled person, and doesn’t represent the people in the community at all. Q More can be fouind on qsaltlake.com

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views

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quotes “Have yourself a merry little Christmas Let your heart be light Next year all our troubles will be out of sight Have yourself a merry little Christmas Make the yuletide gay Next year all our troubles will be miles away Once again as in olden days Happy golden days of yore Faithful friends who are dear to us Will be near to us once more Someday soon we all will be together If the fates allow Until then we’ll have to muddle through somehow So have yourself a merry little Christmas now.”

—Hugh Martin and Ralph Blane

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from the editor

Mary Malouf laughed in the present

BY MICHAEL AARON

Utah has

lost a beautiful, wild, and kind person.

Salt Lake Magazine executive editor Mary Brown Malouf was swept to sea by a “sneaker wave” yesterday on the California coast.

Two years ago, Mary lost the love of her life, Glen Warchol. They lived across the street from me in a beautiful old brick house painted inside with wild colors that made sense with who they were and how they lived and loved.

Big, fun, vibrant personalities.

When she first moved in, a beaming Glen caught me on the street and told me I was going to love Mary. He was right, and I can’t imagine a person who couldn’t love her.

When Glen died, you could see that a part of Mary did as well. While her ever-present smile was still there, it was different. Her eyes a bit distant. She moved from the house this year to help herself attempt to start her new chapter.

Her final days were spent visiting her son in Humboldt Bay on the rocky coast of

northern California. Her last posts were of mezcal, the ocean, trees, animals, and family.

Her family wrote on her Facebook wall something that resonated with me: “There was never a time there wasn’t Mary Malouf.

Until now. Today, Mary died when a rogue wave swept her out to sea off the coast of Northern California. Only she — perhaps the world’s foremost lover of Bronte, BBC mysteries, and, of course, Moby Dick — would appreciate such poetic drama. “‘I know not all that may be coming, but be it what it will, I’ll go to it laughing.’ — Mary Brown Malouf. Oops. Herman Melville.”

In her final letter from the editor in the magazine, Mary told us to remember the good times in the midst of the notso-good and pledge to support one another.

“That’s what humans do: Make do in the hard times, keep hope for the future, and — don’t forget this part! — laugh in the present.

Cheers to a big life lived.

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was a little kid, my favorite afterschool activity was to plop down in front of the television and watch the recently syndicated reruns of my favorite program, Lost in Space! The show’s premise was pretty simple: with Earth dangerously overpopulated, America decides to colonize a distant planet, far outside our solar system.

To jumpstart the colony, the government sends the Robinson family (a nod to The Swiss Family Robinson) as an advance party. Professor Robinson, his wife, and three kids were joined by a robot and the spaceship’s pilot (the very hunky) Major West. But the conniving Dr. Smith accidentally stows away in a failed sabotage attempt, which sends the ship drastically off course.

Dirt-cheap special effects (like the Bloop, a chimp with hairy Mr. Spock-inspired prosthetic ears) and memorable catchphrases — the effete Dr. Smith’s, “Oh! The pain!” and the robot’s, “Danger!

Danger Will Robinson!” — made this program the height of 1960s camp.

What’s wild is that this brightly colored velour clad adventure was set in the not-so-distant future: 1997. Yes, a year that came and went almost 25 years ago.

When the boys were younger, we watched the series on Netflix. They were the perfect ages to find the mixture of adventure and suspense exciting. They even got a kick out of the kitschy special effects — “That’s just a monkey with pointy ears!”

I found myself explaining a lot about how the female characters were portrayed.

I wasn’t comfortable with how the women asked for permission and needed reassurance so frequently from the men. In fact, it seemed like the only characters the women outranked were the kids … and the seemingly very gay Dr. Smith.

I admit that when I was first watching the series all those years ago, I accepted the roles everyone had been assigned —

including the sniveling doctor —without question. I also let myself believe that just maybe the future the show imagined would be my real life as a grown-up.

Thankfully, that didn’t come to fruition.

Yes, Earth’s population is taking a dangerous toll on our natural resources. Yes, women and minorities are still treated unequally too frequently. However, we can’t deny that society has advanced in leaps and bounds.

In just a few weeks, the first female vice president of the United States will be inaugurated. She’s also a woman of color and the first-generation daughter of immigrants. Regardless of whether you think she’s the right person for the job, it’s a great advancement for our society.

LGBTQ+ people have won important hard-fought rights not available in the Robinsons’ future, and we’ve gained acceptance by large swaths of people.

Portrayals of us are more realistic — some are heroes, some are villains, some are partiers, some are parents. Nevertheless, more work still needs to be done.

Maybe the best part of sharing this childhood favorite with the boys stemmed from the fact that it was so cheesy. Even as young as they were, they could identify it all as being fake. The spaceship was obviously just a prop, the scenery clearly painted sets, and even the bad guys were laughable — famously the Robinsons once battle vegetable people.

If all that was false, so was the show’s portrayal of women and a villain widely assumed to be a gay man.

Lost in Space wasn’t the only show from my childhood I shared with my boys. There was also the very trippy H.R. Hufnstuff and the more subdued Land of the Lost with its weird monkey-boy, ChaKa. But the adventures of the intrepid colonists were always our favorite. Maybe because it hinted at a real future better than what television could dream up. Q

JANUARY, 2021 |

ISSUE 319 | Qsaltlake.com

creep of the month

VIEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 19

Franklin Graham ‘The

BY D’ANNE WITKOWSKI

momentous election of pro-equality champions Joe Biden and Kamala Harris puts us on a path to move equality forward by advancing policies to improve the lives of millions of LGBTQ people,” said Human Rights Campaign President Alphonso David.

Sounds good to me, let’s party!

Unfortunately, somebody accidentally invited Franklin Graham to the soirée and he is pissed!

Responding on Facebook to a Christian Post story titled, “LGBT group urges Biden to strip accreditation of Christian schools with biblical beliefs,” Graham wrote, “This article reports how LGBTQ activists within the Democratic Party are pushing their godless, secular agenda with a potential Biden Administration. If you don’t conform to their ideology, agree with their sinful beliefs, teach what they say is right, they want to close you down.”

If by “close you down” he means “preventing religious schools from discriminating against LGBTQ people,” then yes! We are on the same page. Spoiler alert: that is not what Graham means.

More specifically, HRC’s blueprint wants the government to prevent religious schools from claiming religious exemptions to nondiscrimination policies and science curriculum. This is a radical concept for Franklin who calls it “extremely dangerous.”

“If they are allowed free reign, they will go after the accreditation of Christian colleges, then Christian ministries and churches next, to strip them of tax-exempt status and try to force them to operate under policies that go against biblical teaching,” Graham wrote. “This is not only an attack on free speech and expression, but also an attack on our religious liberty.”

In other words, Graham literally believes he has the God-given right to discriminate against LGBTQ people and to claim that science is witchcraft. No one is infringing on religious liberties by mandating that you not only acknowledge that LGBTQ students are human, but that you also track things like bullying against them. I mean, I know the Bible is basically just Jesus whining about how he never gets good press coverage and that Democrats stole his resurrection, but…. Wait, I’m sorry. That’s Trump’s Twitter feed.

Apparently nobody has told Graham that yet, however, as he wrote in his Nov. 28 Twitter rant, “The presidential election isn’t finalized yet, but this shows why who we vote for is so important. We’ve had four years of an administration under President Donald J. Trump that staunchly defends religious freedom, freedom of speech, and the church.”

Sure, you could point out that technically the election isn’t finalized. I mean, Biden hasn’t been inaugurated yet for one thing. But make no mistake that Franklin isn’t being technical here. He is holding out hope that Presidential Lord and Savior Donald J. Trump will rise from the electoral dead and smite the Godless homo Democrats.

With apparently no irony at all, Graham finished with, “We can see that the one who holds the office of President of the United States has tremendous ramifications on our day-to-day lives and for the future of this nation.”

To which I say, respectfully, “Noooooooooo shiiiiiiiiiiiiiit.” Q D’Anne Witkowski is a poet, writer and comedian living with her wife and son. Follow her on Twitter @MamaDWitkowski.

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20 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | PEOPLE OF THE YEAR

PEOPLE OF THE YEAR

Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 319 | JANUARY, 2021

Our Person (or People) of the Year each year are those who made the greatest impact on Utah’s LGBTQ community, for better or worse, this year.

This year, the global pandemic put an end to a myriad of events, group meetings, social events, choir rehearsals and so much more. The “community” in LGBTQ community looked nothing like it has in the past decades.

These people worked to develop and produce ways to maintain a sense of community in this state. They are, therefore, our People of the Year.

Deb Hall

Utah Pride Center Director of Adult Programming

LGBTQ people helping to maintain community in the face of a pandemic

SAGE Utah provides services and resources for the LGBTQ senior community, including community education, provider education, social needs, and advocacy. Its history since it started in the state has been one of fits and starts. Until Deb Hall came along. By all accounts, she has grasped the organization by the reins and it is now a highlight in many people’s lives.

This year threw a wrench in the entire plan for the group. At the beginning of the year, the group was on point for 20 monthly programs, two to three standalone events, and plans to expand to other areas in the state.

“Our strategic plan was strong, our teams in place and we were riding high on the heels of an enormously successful first year,” Hall wrote in a presentation for the Center’s board.

Once the Center was forced to shut its doors because of the pandemic, Hall and her team shifted gears to move all programming online.

“There were a few glitches because not all seniors have access to a computer, and not all seniors understood the technology behind online programs; and not all seniors had access to the internet. We got to work to change that reality,” she wrote.

They offered computers and internet services to seniors who needed them and qualified for a low-income plan. They helped senior from Logan to Utah County and as far west as Tooele.

Indeed, one person of the several who nominated her as a person of the year wrote, “She hooked up the senior population with laptops so that they could be able to participate in the LGBT program Utah Pride Center has to offer online. She took the time to help me with passwords and set up my account. She is a wonderful woman and a great asset to our community.”

The group’s senior newsletter changed from monthly to weekly and included resources on how to shop online, what stores had senior hours, up-to-date information on Covid-19, how to

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connect with food banks, and how to connect with organizations that could help with pet needs.

Virtual programming includes a trivia night, a men’s sack lunch club, a social group, a group that explores countries all over the planet through online virtual travel, a supper club where people virtually share their favorite dinners along with great dinner conversation.

They established a fund with Lyft to pick people up to go to doctor appointments, grocery stores, or other appointments because they were at risk and unable to travel by public transportation.

and taken down.

This year, when it became obvioius that the Utah Pride Festival was going to look completely different than years past, it was Johnson and his team who were tasked to make it happen.

Johnson went to work on developing a plan to make Pride 2.0 — Pride Road Rally happen. Again creating a plan, organizing tents and stages and fencing and tables and much more.

flags and traveled the state to different pride and trans events to place them in the yeards of those who ordered them, raising money for regional organizations.

Rivas also has a retail line of t-shirts and accessories that are otherwise difficult to find in the state.

Harrison Spendlove

Harrison Spendlove Photography

Dallas Rivas Project Rainbow

John Johnson

Utah Pride Center Director of Operations & Administration John Johnson has been the director of operations of so many Utah Prides people stopped counting. In charge of the tents, the fencing, the infrastructure no one notices, and the plan to get it all set up

If something needs to happen, Dallas Rivas is there. This year, as hundreds of Trump-flag-emblazoned trucks traveled up and down the state’s freeways and downtown streets, Rivas and his rainbow-wrapped truck gave many in the community a much -eeded dose of pride, visibility, and love.

As part of Project Rainbow, Rivas and the group’s other volunteers assembled thousands of rainbow flags and trans

Another person who is present when things need to happen, Harrison Spendlove has been on several boards of local LGBTQ organizations, most recently including the Utah LGBTQ+ Chamber of Commerce.

Spendlove was in charge of the group’s Gayla and Economic Summit, both of which were held online and had an impressive list of speakers and participants.

Spendlove also traveled the state for a photographic project he created called It’s Who We Are. From Moab to St. George to Logan and Salt Lake City, he invited people to express themselves and get a photo taken that can be used by their local Pride organizations.

22 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | PEOPLE OF THE YEAR

Ben Morgan & Cody Scott 8-B¡tch

Bonnie O’Brien & Kate Rusk

Bonnie O’Brien is synonymous with the Utah Pride Parade. She has run the show for many, many years of growth and challenges. When it was obvious that the parade wasn’t going to happen this year because crowds of many thousands of people lining a downtown street was risky at best, she and Kate Rusk set out finding another great use of their time.

After, of course, doing their own miniPride Parade on the day the larger one would have happened.

O’Brien’s day job is being a teacher at East High School. Or, as she calls it, a “school mom.” She went door-to-door and met with her students to ensure they had computers and wifi set up so they could excel in their studies.

But she and Rusk were nominated this year because they spent the beginning of the quarantine gathering and repairing bicycles for Rose Park area kids and adults. They purchased used bikes found in classifieds, took donated bikes, and set up everyone in the neighborhood with both bikes and safety gear. Adults were provided with bikes so they could avoid using public transportation to get to work.

“Though we didn’t have a Pride Festival in June, the queer spirit was in full, brilliant color, while they spent the effort they would have on the parade, helping the community in a deeply meaningful way,” wrote their nominator.

Ben Morgan, aka Ivory LaRue, and Cody Scott, aka Rose Nylon, have created a phenomenon in 8-B¡tch — a digital drag show streamed on twitch and then uploaded to YouTube.

“I literally cannot gush enough,” wrote their nominator. “They have taken something like, oh I don’t know, global trauma!? and turned it into such a wonderful opportunity for our community.”

When the lockdown happened, drag performances were put on hiatus. Some who paid their bills with tips were left to struggle. Also, drag is a staple of the LGBTQ community across the globe.

The pair put their heads together and created a digital space for the community to come together and enjoy drag in all its intricacies, socialize in a responsible way and provide a way for performers to be tipped electronically.

Gene Gieber

Co-owner, Club Try-Angles As an owner of Club Try-Angles, Gene’s first and foremost concerns are for the

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 319 | JANUARY, 2021

LGBTQ community. When the bar was forced to close at the beginning of the pandemic, Gene worked to make sure his staff was taken care of.

When they were able to re-open, he went overboard to ensure the safety of the community and his staff, setting rules above and beyond what was required by the Department of Health.

When he was approached by the producers of 8-B¡tch, hoping to help the drag community raise some funds and entertain an audience, he agreed to show the performances on the large screen, with socially distanced tables for their audience. Some of the queens were at the bar during the presentation and were able to receive tips in person.

This writer found out the hard way — don’t go out the in door!

Micheal Repp & Riley Richter Sun-Trapp

The Sun-Trapp is the largest LGBTQ bar in the state, and Micheal Repp and Riley Richter make sure to keep the community safe. After a man drew a gun in an argument with a door person this year, Repp installed a metal detector at the door to ensure the safety of patrons and staff. With the coronavirus, the bar has installed plastic barriers and uses the same electrostatic spraying solution and sprayer used by airlines for the safety of their passengers.

Repp has also been at the forefront of efforts by a number of Salt Lake bars trying to survive and suing the state of Utah for forcing them to close down at 10 p.m. while allowing other businesses to remain open.

JANUARY, 2021 |

PEOPLE OF THE YEAR | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 23

ISSUE 319 | Qsaltlake.com

Nicholas Rupp Salt Lake County Department of Health

As Communications & PR Manager at the Salt Lake County Department of Health, Nicholas Rupp is on our television screens a lot these days with stern warnings for those who do not see and understand the importance of safety during this pandemic. He even, in the early days of the Coronavirus, took Gov. Gary Herbert to task for hosting a soirée at the Governor’s Mansion where most of the attendees were not wearing masks, including the governor himself.

As the face of the County Health Department, Rupp is excelling and keeping all county residents safe with his succinct, easy-to-understand, and unflinching, honest communications.

801-308-2050

www.jonjepsen.com

Miles Broadhead What Have You Been Cooking

Miles Broadhead has been a restaurant manager and bar manager for much of his adult life. When the pandemic hit and The Punchbowl was forced to close down, he knew that people still needed the social aspects of food and drink. He created a Facebook group that has over 2,400 people called What Have You Been Cooking, where people show just that — their culinary creations. Since it can be considered a faux pas to show your meals on your wall, this is a place that welcomes it wholeheartedly.

“I just wanted to use the love of cooking and sharing with each other as a hug I can’t give,” he said. Q

open daily 7am to 8pm order online at coffeegardenslc.com 801-355-3425 • 878 e harvey milk blvd

THANK YOU READERS FOR VOTING

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24 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | QUEER GUIDE TO SUNDANCE

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 319 | JANUARY, 2021

Queer Guide to Sundance 2021 The Sundance Institute announced the slate of films for the 2021 Sundance Film Festival, which will largely be run through virtual screenings from January 28 through February 3.

Here is QSaltLake‘s annual guide to LGBTQ-inclusive narrative films, documentaries, and shorts that Sundance will feature with queer storylines and/or talent.

U.S. DRAMATIC COMPETITION

Together Together

DIRECTOR & SCREENWRITER: NIKOLE BECKWITH PRODUCERS: ANTHONY BRANDONISIO, DANIELA TAPLIN LUNDBERG, TIM HEADINGTON

When young loner Anna is hired as the surrogate for Matt, a single man in his 40s, the two strangers come to realize this unexpected relationship will quickly challenge their perceptions of connection, boundaries, and the particulars of love.

CAST: ED HELMS, PATTI HARRISON, TIG NOTARO, JULIO TORRES, ANNA KONKLE

U.S. DOCUMENTARY COMPETITION

At the Ready

DIRECTOR: MAISIE CROW PRODUCERS: HILLARY PIERCE, MAISIE CROW, ABBIE PERRAULT

Home to one of the region’s largest law enforcement education programs, students at Horizon High School in El Paso train to become police officers and Border Patrol agents as they discover the realities of their dream jobs may be at odds with the truths and people they hold most dear.

WORLD CINEMA DOCUMENTARY COMPETITION

Passing

DIRECTOR AND SCREENWRITER: REBECCA HALL PRODUCERS: FOREST WHITAKER, NINA YANG BONGIOVI, MARGOT HAND, REBECCA HALL

Two African-American women who can “pass” as white choose to live on opposite sides of the color line in 1929 New York in an exploration of racial and gender identity, performance, obsession, and repression.

Based on the novella by Nella Larsen.

CAST: TESSA THOMPSON, RUTH NEGGA, ANDRÉ HOLLAND, ALEXANDER SKARSGÅRD, BILL CAMP

Ailey

DIRECTOR: JAMILA WIGNOT, PRODUCER: LAUREN DEFILIPPO

Alvin Ailey was a visionary artist who found salvation through dance. Told in his own words and through the creation of a dance inspired by his life, this immersive portrait follows a man who, when confronted by a world that refused to embrace him, determined to build one that would.

Flee

DENMARK-FRANCE-SWEDEN-NORWAY DIRECTOR: JONAS POHER RASMUSSEN PRODUCERS: MONICA HELLSTRÖM, SIGNE BYRGE SØRENSEN

Amin arrived as an unaccompanied minor in Denmark from Afghanistan. Today, he is a successful academic and is getting married to his long-time boyfriend. A secret he has been hiding for 20 years threatens to ruin the life he has built.

DAY ONE

JANUARY, 2021 |

QUEER GUIDE TO SUNDANCE | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 25

ISSUE 319 | Qsaltlake.com

SPOTLIGHT

INDIE SERIES PROGRAM

The World to Come

4 Feet High

Somewhere along the mid-nineteenth century American East Coast frontier, two neighboring couples battle hardship and isolation, witnessed by a splendid yet testing landscape, challenging them both physically and psychologically.

Juana, a 17-year-old wheelchair user, aims to explore her sexuality but is ashamed of her body. Trying to find her place in a new high school, she will go through failure, friendship, fear, and politics until she builds her own pride.

CAST: KATHERINE WATERSTON, VANESSA KIRBY, CASEY AFFLECK, CHRISTOPHER ABBOTT NORTH AMERICAN PREMIERE

CAST: MARISOL AGOSTINA IRIGOYEN, FLORENCIA LICERA, MARCIO RAMSES, NATALIA DI CIENZO, FRANCISCA SPINOTTI

NEXT

SHORTS

Ma Belle / My Beauty

This is the Way We Rise

The Most Beautiful Boy in the World DIRECTORS: KRISTINA LINDSTRÖM, KRISTIAN PETRI PRODUCER: STINA GARDELL

Swedish actor/musician Björn Andresen’s life was forever changed at the age of 15, when he played Tadzio, the object of Dirk Bogarde’s obsession in Death in Venice – a role which led Italian maestro Luchino Visconti to dub him “the world’s most beautiful boy.”

PREMIERES

DIRECTOR: MONA FASTVOLD, SCREENWRITERS: RON HANSEN, JIM SHEPARD PRODUCERS: CASEY AFFLECK, WHITAKER LADER, PAMELA KOFFLER, DAVID HINOJOSA, MARGARETHE BAILLOU

ARGENTINA-FRANCE DIRECTORS: MARÍA BELÉN PONCIO, ROSARIO PERAZOLO MASJOAN EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: EZEQUIEL LENARDÓN, MARIE BLONDIAUX

My Name Is Pauli Murray

DIRECTORS: BETSY WEST, JULIE COHEN PRODUCER: TALLEAH BRIDGES MCMAHON

Overlooked by history, Pauli Murray was a legal trailblazer whose ideas influenced RBG’s fight for gender equality and Thurgood Marshall’s landmark civil rights arguments. Featuring never-before-seen footage and audio recordings, a portrait of Murray’s impact as a non-binary Black luminary: lawyer, activist, poet, and priest who transformed our world.(DOCUMENTARY)

MIDNIGHT

U.S.-FRANCE DIRECTOR AND SCREENWRITER: MARION HILL PRODUCERS: BEN MATHENY, KELSEY SCULT, MARION HILL

A surprise reunion in southern France reignites passions and jealousies between two women who were formerly polyamorous lovers.

An exploration into the creative process, following native Hawaiian slam poet Jamaica Heolimeleikalani Osorio, as her art is reinvigorated by her calling to protect sacred sites atop Maunakea, Hawaii.

CAST: IDELLA JOHNSON, HANNAH PEPPER, ­LUCIEN GUIGNARD, SIVAN NOAM SHIMON

Unliveable

Knocking

SWEDEN DIRECTOR: FRIDA KEMPFF, SCREENWRITER: EMMA BROSTRÖM PRODUCER: ERIK ANDERSSON

When Molly moves into her new apartment after a tragic accident, a strange noise from upstairs begins to unnerve her. As its intensity grows, she confronts her neighbors – but no one seems to hear what she is hearing.

CAST: CECILIA MILOCCO

We’re All Going to the World’s Fair

DIRECTOR & SCREENWRITER: JANE SCHOENBRUN PRODUCERS: SARAH WINSHALL, CARLOS ZOZAYA

A teenage girl becomes immersed in an online role-playing game.

CAST: ANNA COBB, MICHAEL J. ROGERS

In Brazil, where a trans person is murdered every three days, Marilene searches for her daughter, Roberta, a trans woman who is missing. Running out of time, she discovers one hope for the future.

The full 2021 Sundance Film Festival catalog is HERE.

26 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | RELATIONSHIPS

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 319 | JANUARY, 2021

positive thoughts

Finding love in the time of Coronavirus

Our first

BY CHARLES SANCHEZ

date was on a Tuesday night. I wasn’t sure it was a date at first, but I was hopeful. To be dating during a(nother) pandemic is a little nutzo, but my Romeo is completely COVID-worthy, if you know what I mean. We didn’t actually meet during the novel coronavirus pandemic. I met Romey – sometimes I call him Romey – about seven or eight months ago.

He works for a major national retailer and contacted me via Instagram with an idea to do an HIV awareness event at the store’s SOHO location featuring my web series, Merce. We got together for a long coffee and kicked around ideas. I found him criminally handsome – tall, with brown hair and blue-hazel eyes. I like big fellas, and he fit the bill. He’s smart, very funny, an artist, in his fabulous 50s (like me), and he’s living with HIV. We live in the same area of Queens, New York City, and that Tuesday night at 8:30 p.m., I huffed and puffed up the four flights of stairs to his apartment. I dressed cute but didn’t overdo it. He opened the door wearing relaxie clothes: shorts, a T-shirt, and a huge devilish smile.

Once I de-masked, Romey showed me around his quaint one-bedroom apartment. Every wall in every room is filled with his paintings, political and passionate, each containing an amiable image juxtaposed with a protest phrase like “End AIDS” or “Black Lives Matter.” Even his bathroom had art! I was charmed.

As a classical radio station played, we dug into eggplant with garlic sauce and chicken with broccoli (I was touched that he also got me an eggroll), and sat in his living room with our plates balanced on our laps, party-style. I offered to pay for half of the food, and he dismissed the idea. As we noshed, we talked about art, his life, my life. I’m sober, and he doesn’t really drink, so that’s great. The fact that we both are living with HIV made certain conversations (“Are you on PrEP?” “Do you know what U equals U means?”) unPHOTO: RICK GUIDOTTI

necessary. I gushed about his art. He complimented my comedy and encouraged my creative work. We talked for more than two hours.

When I got up to leave, we hugged. The hug lingered. He slowly started to rub my back, then nuzzled my neck. Gradually, my mouth found his.

He took my hand and led me to his bedroom. I told him that I wasn’t going to have sex. It was our first date, and while I’m certainly no prude, I need to protect my tender heart. Like the old song says, “My heart has been well schooled, for I have been fooled in the past.” He responded by saying, “Let’s just get more comfortable.” We laid down, continued our smack fest, and although our shirts were opened and hands went under pants, we didn’t have sex. We were both excited, and at one point he said, “Isn’t this great? We’ll have November and December and January…”

I thought, “Wait a minute. Are we dating already?” We kissed more and more, and the armor around my heart began to melt away. In 30-plus years of dating, I don’t know if I’ve ever been kissed like that. I felt we were releasing ourselves into each other. It was beautiful and overwhelming.

When we noticed the time, it was almost 2:30 a.m. I realized that I hadn’t taken my HIV medication and needed to go home. The subways stop running at 1, so I called a Lyft. Romeo stuffed a 20-dollar bill in my pants pocket, saying, “You shouldn’t have to pay for the ride home.” I tried to hand it back to him, and he insisted. He walked me down the stairs, and we hugged as the driver pulled up.

“Call me when you get home,” Romey said.

And I did.

The next day, I woke thinking the night before had been a dream. Dabbing balm on my kiss-worn lips, I texted Romeo, and he assured me that the night had been real and certainly dreamy. Then he asked when he could see me again. We made a date for that night. I warned him that I still wasn’t going to have sex yet, but he encouraged me to

bring my meds so I could stay the night.

“Cuddling will be wonderful,” he said.

Hours later, I leapt back up the stairs to his apartment two at a time. He greeted me this second night with a little box: a sweet gift of cologne samples he got from work. I trepidly kissed him hello, and he asked if something was wrong. I said that I was just a bit reserved since this was all brand new. He wrapped his big arms around me, saying, “There’s no need to be scared. I’m right here.”

We nibbled on mediocre tacos as we talked more about our lives. We giggled about ex-boyfriends and crazy guys we’d hooked up with, adventurous sex we’d had. Romeo told me how nice it was to be with someone close to his age. He had dated a lot of younger guys, “dented cans,” he calls them.

We then got ready for bed, and he gifted me a fresh toothbrush. He placed it in his medicine cabinet, saying, “And it begins.” He then insisted I moisturize my face before sleep, and he tenderly stippled my face with luxurious lotion.

We went to his bed and kissed, and it was everything the night before had been and more. At one point, he could sense that I was trying to emotionally protect myself and whispered, “Come on, Charles.

Come home to me. I love it when you come home to me.” When he said that, the knees of my heart buckled.

My mind swirled, “Oh, my God. Is this my boyfriend? Could we be happy together? This is unbelievable!” Everything about being with him felt like the future.

The next morning, he made coffee for me, sweetened with Splenda that he’d swiped from his work for the occasion, and he cooked us scrambled eggs and toast with melted butter. We talked about plans for the weekend (sex was certainly going to be on the agenda), and it was all romantic and comfy and delicious. I floated home like a cartoon balloon in a holiday parade.

Around 4 that afternoon, I sent him a little goofy text. Then at 10:30 or so, I texted to ask how his day was. No response.

Huh. Friday, I texted a sweet, “Good morning, beautiful” gif. No response. I sent another text a half hour later asking if everything was OK, and no response. I started to feel a knot in my stomach.

JANUARY, 2021 |

ISSUE 319 | Qsaltlake.com

On Saturday morning, I called Romeo and left a message. I thought that there might be a possibility that his phone had conked out, but deep down, I knew the truth.

I never heard from Romeo again. Two incredible nights, romantic gestures, incredible kissing, cooking breakfast for me, paying for my cab, talking about the future, then poltergeist. What was it? Was it me? Did he decide that I was another “dented can?”

I thought I was past this kind of craziness from men, that I was too savvy after 30-plus years of dating to be romantically conned again.

Ah, but remember the song that says, “My heart should be well schooled, for I’ve been fooled in the past?” The next line is, “Still I fall in love too easily. I fall in love too fast.”

DAMMIT. Thank the Universe that I didn’t have sex with him. If I’d have done that, the ghosting would have been much more devastating. From the emotion that I felt in his kisses, I may not have ever recovered from the emotions that sex with Romeo would have evoked.

What makes this sting more sharply is that before meeting Romeo, I’d resigned myself to being alone and felt fine about it. Finding true love had come to seem like a fairy tale notion for jaded ol’ me. Not everybody has to find the mythical “One,” and just because gay marriage is legal (for now) doesn’t make it a requirement.

I was cool with being single, having my bevy of beautiful friends, my family, and the occasional kinky trick when the itch needed scratching.

This experience with Romey shook that notion up and spun it around, making me long for and dream about romantic love again. DAMMIT.

I suppose I was extra vulnerable. We’re all going through this pandemic, collectively trying to stay safe and socially distant. I’m touch starved, man starved, and affection starved. The anniversary of my HIV diagnosis is right around now (Nov. 4), and I’m always extra sensitive in the weeks surrounding that day. Add to that the stress of the political climate, rampant racism, violence, fear, so much that’s unknown. When I think about it with all that in mind, what defense did I have?

Friends who I’ve shared the experience with have said well-meaning, encouraging things to me, like, “What an asshole!” “He’s crazy!” “Men are such fucktards!” and “Gay men are so damaged, they don’t even know how to be a grownup.” All that may be true, but if Romeo is a damaged-crazy-ass‑hole-fucktard, then who was I kissing? Thinking about him that way invalidates my experience. I don’t know why Romey chose to ghost me. I thought he was feeling what I felt. I had a fantastic whirlwind of a time with an incredibly attractive, smart, funny, artistic, super sexy, great guy. Moreover, he made me feel handsome, sexy, smart and all of it.

It still sucks, though, and it’s going to be a bit before I again deem someone COVID-worthy. Heartache is another kind of virus, and I can’t imagine there’ll be a vaccine for that anytime soon. Q Charles Sanchez is a Mexican-American gay writer and actor living with HIV in New York City. A contributing editor for TheBody, he is also the creator, lead writer, and star of the award-winning musical comedy web series “Merce,” about a fabulous HIV-positive guy living in New York who isn’t sad, sick, or dying. This column is a project of TheBody, Plus, Positively Aware, POZ, QSaltLake Magazine, and Q Syndicate. Visit their websites for the latest updates on HIV/AIDS.

RELATIONSHIPS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 27

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28 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | COMICS

Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 319 | JANUARY, 2021

PUZZLES | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 29

JANUARY, 2021 | ISSUE 319 | Qsaltlake.com

Gay Best Friend

Each Sudoku puzzle has a unique solution which can be reached logically without guessing. Enter digits 1 through 9 into the blank spaces. Every row must contain one of each digit, as must each column and each 3x3 square. Qdoku

Q doku Level: Medium

7 4 6

2 4

1

1 7 5 8 3 2

3 4

1

5 9 2 2

5 6

7

1

7 8 1 3 4

4

3

7 2 8 9

2 8 6

4 3

4

1

7

3

9 5 5 2 6 8 1 6 3 4 1 4 7 8 5 6 5 7 7 4 8 4 3 1 6

9 1 8 6

7

9

3

4 7 9 3 4 9 4

7 5 1 4 2

2

4 9

6

8 6 8 2 1 7 5 1

2 3 9

8

3 6 9 5 7

1 5 6 5 7 2 7

2 5

4 2 6

41 Psyche parts, to Frasier 42 To some extent ACROSS 1 Hairy market pessi- 43 Our Town playwright 44 Valhalla VIP mist?

5 Susan Feniger prepa- 45 Guthrie with a guitar 46 Greg Kinnear played ration the GBF in this 1997 9 Swedish import to movie Tinsel Town 52 Resell REM concert 14 “She” to Bonheur tickets, e.g.

15 One-time Atlanta 53 Piece of gay rodeo arena gear 16 Mild oath 54 Bear overhead 17 Trump portrayer 55 Harbor site Baldwin 56 Colleges, to Ruby 18 Neeson of Kinsey Rose 19 Get around 20 Wilson Cruz played 57 Richard of A Summer Place the GBF in this ‘90s 58 Actor Robert and TV series family 23 Gay demographer 59 Depilatory brand Gates 60 “Chim-Chim-Cher24 Reclined ee” residue 25 “The Trolley Song” noise DOWN 28 Small suckers 1 Supporter of Julia 29 Christopher, to Morgan?

Madonna 2 Cousin of Jethro and 32 War hero Murphy Jethrine 33 Our Sons actor Grant 3 Stein fillers 34 Lots of bucks 4 Accept the authority 35 Nico Santos played of the GBF in this 2018 5 Their cuspid neighmovie bors are bi 38 Martinac’s Out of 6 Wild Nights with ___ ___ 7 Like a rim job 39 Working hard 8 Broadway illumination 40 Gay city PUZZLE SOLUTIONS ON PAGE 38

9 Soccer position 10 Singing chipmunk 11 It’s over your head 12 Dessert cheese 13 Queer 21 Not forthcoming 22 Country house, to Nureyev 25 Here are the pricks 26 Glaringly sensational 27 Affleck’s Chasing Amy crush 28 Completely clear 29 Fag hag on a date, perhaps 30 Zellweger of Chicago 31 Figure skating star Brian 33 Strategy in Billy Bean’s sport 34 Talks with Socrates 36 One to ten, e.g.

37 Knocked over, as a drink 42 Becomes a gay parent 43 Most sardonic 44 Duly noted a hottie 45 Degree of easiness 46 The Boys in the Band problem 47 Barneys event 48 Tops 49 Proof word 50 Poet ___ Wu 51 Director Gus Van ___ 52 Kneeler before a queen

30 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | SEX

sex and salt lake city

Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 319 | JANUARY, 2021

A kinder, gentler year

BY DR. LAURIE BENNETT-COOK

After a

couple of years of dating, followed by living together, my partner and I were married in 2004. We attempted the first few years to celebrate our union by doing traditional anniversary gifts. The first year was “paper,” the second was “cotton,” the third “leather,” and so on. To be honest, we kinda gave up the traditions after a while. But that first year’s gift stuck.

Together we purchased a leather-bound journal with the intention of taking turns writing love notes to each other in it.

We began with the book placed on one of our bedside tables, and every now and then, one of us would pick it up and add a sweet love note to the other or a recounting of some cool adventure we’d shared.

It was an incredibly romantic gesture that we both treasured. Over time, as the rose would seem to lose its bloom in the relationship, it was nice to pick up and read previous entries and remember why we chose to commit to this partnership; which, of course, would lead to the writing of another kindness to the other.

It’s been 16 years since we started our shared journal writing. Like most relationships, we’ve had many ups and downs since we began. Some of the pages have been used as expressions of hurt, anger, disappointment. Some have shared loss of hopes and aspirations. Some haven’t necessarily been written in a gentle manner but rather a scathing rebuke to the other. But invariably, every single time, the messages return to sweet, loving, adoration, and kindness to the other — or more importantly, to ourselves.

We’re now on our fifth journal.

This morning I picked up the most current journal. It’s hardbound with the scene of a windmill on the cover — a purchase we made in Amsterdam at the beginning of 2020. The very book itself is a reflection of how much our life has changed over the past year.

Like most, I entered 2020 with some big hopes. Personally, I had goals to travel more and spend more time with family.

Career goals included more public speaking engagements at universities and conferences. By mid-March, I expected some things would be delayed. That thinking proved to be naive.

When March and the first days of quarantine hit, my partner and I were naively a bit giddy about the endless days we were going to spend in bed together and all the home projects we were going to complete.

Of course, as with most, as more and more people have fallen ill, lost jobs, and all sense of security, it’s been a real challenge to keep our moods up.

Giddiness is very far away — let alone feeling any kind of sexy.

So now we face the hopes of a new year ahead — fresh goals and aspirations. In spite of that, many people are rightfully speculative. The truth is, the year may be a new one, but we’re still faced with a raging pandemic, racial inequality, record unemployment, food and housing insecurities, political divisiveness, and on and on and on.

For the new year, I’d like to suggest we all make a resolution to just be kinder — whatever that looks like. Kinder and gentler to ourselves as well as others.

Maybe we don’t do the projects we had hoped for. Maybe we eat comfort food and gain weight rather than exercise during these down days. Maybe it has been weeks since getting fully dressed.

Maybe being social even through Zoom

calls, texting, or a phone call feels like too much. Maybe there’s just a lot more binge TV time that feels justified. Whatever the coping mechanisms, be kind to yourself and recognize that this time we’re in is just flat out tough.

It may be some time before we’re able to gather in groups or feel comfortable meeting new potential partners. Yes, we have a new administration, and yes, there’s now a vaccine making its way through our population, but we still have

a collective recovery that will be experienced for some time, and there is still much work to do.

So in the meantime, I again encourage you to be kind to yourself. Pick up a notebook or journal and begin the process of writing love notes to yourself. My personal journals with my partner now find their way to all different areas of the house. We still each take a turn and write heartfelt messages to the other. But just as importantly, if not more so, they serve a purpose to write heartfelt words to ourselves. Q Dr. Laurie Bennett-Cook is a Clinical Sexologist with a private practice in Salt Lake City. Due to COVID, all sessions are virtual and on a sliding scale. She can be reached at DrLaurieBennettCook@gmail.com

JANUARY, 2021 | ISSUE 319 | Qsaltlake.com

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32 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | QMMUNITY

SPORTS

QUAC — Queer Utah Aquatic Club  quacquac.org  questions@ quacquac.org Salt Lake Goodtime Bowling League  bit.ly/slgoodtime Stonewall Sports SLC  fb.me/SLCStonewall  stonewallsaltlakecity. leagueapps.com 385-243-1828 Utah Gay Football League  UtahGayFootballLeague.com  fb.me/UtahGayFootballLeague Venture Out Utah  facebook.com/groups/ Venture.OUT.Utah SUPPORT

Alcoholics Anonymous 801-484-7871  utahaa.org LGBT meetings: Sun. 3p Acceptance Group, UPC,1380 S Main Tues. 8:15p Live & Let Live, Mt Tabor Lutheran, 175 S 700 E Wed. 7p Sober Today, 375 Harrison Blvd, Ogden Fri. 8p Stonewall Group, Mt Tabor Lutheran, 175 S 700 E

 utahpridecenter. org/programs/youthfamily-programs/

Puzzle Solutions

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umen.org

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OUT U.S. OLYMPIC MEN’S SLOPESTYLE SILVER MEDALIST GUS KENWORTHY

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RELIGIOUS

First Baptist Church  firstbaptist-slc.org * office@firstbaptistslc.org 11a Sundays 777 S 1300 E 801-582-4921 Sacred Light of Christ  slcchurch.org 823 S 600 E 801-595-0052 11a Sundays

utahpridecenter.org

Alternative Garden Club  bit.ly/altgarden * altgardenclub@gmail.com blackBOARD Men’s Kink/Sex/BDSM education, 1st, 3rd Mons.  blackbootsslc.org blackBOOTS Kink/BDSM Men’s leather/kink/ fetish/BDSM 4th Sats.  blackbootsslc.org Gay Writes writing group, DiverseCity 6:30 pm 2nd, 4th Mondays, Community Writing Ctr, 210 E 400 S Men Who Move  menwhomove.org OWLS of Utah (Older, Wiser, Lesbian. Sisters)  bit.ly/owlsutah qVinum Wine Tasting  qvinum.com Sage Utah, Seniors  fb.me/sageutah  sageutah@ utahpridecenter.org 801-557-9203 Temple Squares Square Dance Club  templesquares.org 801-449-1293 Utah Bears  utahbears.com  fb.me/utahbears  info@utahbears.com

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POLITICAL

Equality Utah  equalityutah.org * info@equalityutah.org 175 W 200 S, Ste 1004 801-355-3479 Utah Libertarian Party 6885 S State St #200 888-957-8824 Utah Log Cabin Republicans  bit.ly/logcabinutah 801-657-9611 Utah Stonewall Democrats  utahstonewalldemocrats.org  fb.me/ utahstonewalldems

 1to5club@

YOUTH/COLLEGE

Encircle LGBTQ Family and Youth Resource Ctr  encircletogether.org fb.me/encircletogether 91 W 200 S, Provo, 331 S 600 E, SLC Families Like Ours (ages 2-10)  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/youth-familyprograms/ Gay-Straight Alliance Network  gsanetwork.org Salt Lake Community College LGBTQ+ 8 slcc.edu/lgbtq/ University of Utah LGBT Resource Center 8 lgbt.utah.edu 200 S Central Campus Dr Rm 409 801-587-7973 USGA at BYU  usgabyu.com  fb.me/UsgaAtByu Utah State Univ. Access & Diversity Ctr  inclusion.usu.edu/ lgbtqa Utah Valley Univ Spectrum  facebook.com/ groups/uvuspectrum Weber State University LGBT Resource Center  weber.edu/ lgbtresourcecenter 801-626-7271 Youth Activity Night ages 10-14, 14-20  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/youth-familyprograms/

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HEALTH & HIV

Peer Support for Mental Illness — PSMI Thurs 7pm, Utah Pride Ctr Planned Parenthood 654 S 900 E 800-230-PLAN Salt Lake County Health Dept HIV/STD Clinic 660 S 200 E, 4th Floor Walk-ins M–F 10a–4p Appts 385-468-4242 Utah AIDS Foundation  utahaids.org * mail@utahaids.org 1408 S 1100 E 801-487-2323

Rainbow Law Free Clinic 2nd Thurs 6:30–7:30pm UofU Law School, 383 S University St

1 to 5 Club (bisexual)  fb.me/1to5ClubUtah

Youth Survivors of Suicide Attempt  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/youth-familyprograms/  youthsosa@ utahpridecenter.org

Crystal Meth Anon  crystalmeth.org Sun. 1:30pm Clean, Sober & Proud LGBTQIA+Straight USARA, 180 E 2100 S LifeRing Secular Recovery 801-608-8146  liferingutah.org Sun. 10am Univ. Neuropsychiatric Institute, 501 Chipeta Way #1566 Thurs. 7pm, USARA, 180 E 2100 S, #100 Sat. 11am, First Baptist Church, 777 S 1300 E Men’s Support Group  utahpridecenter. org/programs/lgbtqadults/  joshuabravo@ utahpridecenter.org Survivors of Suicide Attempt  bit.ly/upc_sosa  sosa@ utahpridecenter.org Trans Adult Support  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/lgbtq-adults/  lanegardinier@ utahpridecenter.org TransAction  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/transaction/ Sundays 2–3:30pm Women’s Support Group  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/lgbtq-adults/  mariananibley@ utahpridecenter.org Youth Support Group ages 10-14, 14-20

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DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-7233 YWCA of Salt Lake  ywca.org/saltlakecity 322 E 300 S 801-537-8600

LEGAL

SOCIAL

Weds 6pm Raw Bean Coffee, 611 W Temple Utah Male Naturists  umen.org  info@umen.org Utah Pride Center  utahpridecenter.org  info@utahpridecenter.org 1380 S Main St 801-539-8800 Venture OUT Utah  bit.ly/GetOutsideUtah

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LGBTQ-Affirmative Psycho-therapists Guild of Utah  lgbtqtherapists.com * jim@lgbtqtherapists.com Utah Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce  utahgaychamber.com * info@utahgaychamber.com LGBT & Allied Lawyers of Utah  lgbtutahlawyers.com * lgbtutahlawyers@gmail.com Utah Independent Business Coalition  utahindependentbusiness.org 801-879-4928

HOMELESS SVCS

VOA Homeless Youth Resource Ctr, ages 15–21 880 S 400 W 801-364-0744 Transition Homes: Young Men’s 801-433-1713 Young Women’s 801-359-5545

Wasatch Metropolitan Community Church  wasatchmcc.org 801-889-8764 Sundays except the 2nd Sunday, 11:15a at Crone’s Hollow, 3834 S. Main

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BUSINESS

Weber-Morgan Health Mon., Weds 1-4:30p 477 23rd St, Ogden Appt 801-399-7250

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Qmmunity Groups

Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 319 | JANUARY, 2021

BOOK REVIEW | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 33

JANUARY, 2021 | ISSUE 319 | Qsaltlake.com

the bookworm sez REVIEW BY TERRI SCHLICHENMEYER

The Big Tow: An Unlikely Romance

BY ANN MCMAN, C.2020, BYWATER BOOKS, $17.95, 340 PAGES

Two wheels hooked.

That was your vehicle: two wheels on the ground, the other two in the air, safely attached to a bar hooked on both ends to a big truck. Oh, how you hate shredded tires, check-engine lights, busted radiators, dead batteries, and the guy with the rig, but in the new book The Big Tow by Ann McMan, a wired starter isn’t the only thing that’s hot.

Vera “Nick” Nicholson had put in her time.

After six years at Turner, Witherspoon, Anders and Tyler, Attorneys at Law, Nick thought she might’ve achieved partner, but no. Instead, because she was the firm’s only “brown” employee and because senior partners figured “floor-scraping assignments” would be “second nature” to her, that’s what she got – like, for instance, the latest case, a stolen car. Nick didn’t know jack about stolen cars. She had no contacts there in North Carolina to ask for help. And that’s how she ended up at National Recovery Bureau, a back-lot repo business run by a chain-smoking, no-nonsense older woman with zero patience, and a guy named Fast Eddie.

For $500, they helped Nick find the car.

When Fast Eddie enticed her with 10 G’s in cash for “profit sharing,” that was a big surprise. So was the offer of a part-time job from NRB. And

so was the co-worker NRB assigned to Nick, a gorgeous blonde named Frankie. She had a killer body and enough imagination to figure out how to complete the toughest cases.

Meanwhile, Nick used her imagination to think about Frankie’s killer body.

Despite the danger and the hassle, working for NRB did have its benefits: the money was great and the company was even better, and Nick cautiously allowed herself to fall in love. She and Frankie were becoming more than just partners at work; they were a couple that happened to work together, and they did a good job.

But there was something off about Fast Eddie...

Despite that it leans a bit toward wordiness and could have used maybe one less caper, The Big Tow is a true delight – but not for the reasons you might think.

Author Ann McMan’s two main characters are certainly likable: Nick is one of those people you want in your corner, and Frankie seems like someone you’d have drinks with. The real appeal of this book, though, lies in the world surrounding these two. The dispatcher at NRB and Nick’s gay roommate are spit-out-your-coffee funny, and you must read this book to learn who Carol Jenkins is. There are doting mothers, wise fathers, a goth girl at a funeral home, and a Yoda-type butcher who speaks in hints.

Though he’s really basically a caricature, even Fast Eddie is someone you’ll look for as you’re reading this book.

This is the kind of story that, if it happened to you, you’d get plenty of mileage out of it at your next party.

It’s got romance, action, humor, and theft — how can you go wrong? Start The Big Tow and you’ll be hooked. Q

q scopes JANUARY

BY SAM KELLEY-MILLS

ARIES March 20–April 19

The temptation to reinvent everything is tempting. But take some time and introduce change gradually. There is nothing wrong with the status quo. Big changes need to be eased in slowly. Don’t forget to breathe and let things glide for a while. The fun is about to begin to hold on.

TAURUS Apr 20–May 20

Get in touch with a friend with whom you have lost touch. There is a strange sense that time has stood still but escaped your grasp.

It’s okay to be afraid of reaching out.

The fastest way to make a connection is to find a common love. Take a position that you love and enjoy the passion.

GEMINI May 21–June 20

It’s a good time for parties and getting into the spirit of things.

Even if things can’t be as big or exciting as you’d like, there are still plenty of opportunities for pleasure. Plan things carefully and put safety first. If someone can’t play by the rules, then they aren’t

going to be worth the risks.

CANCER June 21–July 22

Gain perspective on business and finances. This is a great time to budget for a trip or big purchase that hasn’t been feasible for a while.

Even if things aren’t going to work out, plan as though they will. It never hurts to create a goal and put forward the measure to make it happen.

LIBRA Sept 23–October 22

Not everyone is feeling as optimistic as you are. It might be a good time to cut a few tight connections and get a sense of freedom for a bit. That’s not to say you have to burn a bridge, but rather create some new paths to explore. You may find the examples you set to fix the problems.

SCORPIO Oct. 23–Nov. 21

LEO July 23–August 22

Even when it seems like a bad idea, there is always a good fight to be had. Engage in a debate that stimulates you and enjoy the process of discovery. Even when you are wrong, you are a winner. The truth comes from expanding your mind as well as other aspects of yourself. Enjoy!

VIRGO August 23–Sep. 2

Nov. 22–December 20.

This could be the worst time for someone to bother you.

Don’t be harsh and take some time to be alone. Discover yourself. There is a longing that needs to be satisfied. Take matters into your own hands and get the work done. You may find that others are much more likable afterward.

It might take some time to warm up and get back to business. The real stress comes not from your lack of progress but the lack of desire. Take it slow when dealing with a friend or someone you love and express a need for patience. You may find that they share your need for calm too.

SAGITTARIUS

It might not be the quickest route to happiness, but you can always learn to let go of obligations. There is a need to feel a sense of calm but the need to please is always on your mind.

For just a few minutes, allow others to realize just how much they need you by letting go. They’ll be back

CAPRICORN Dec 21–Jan 19

Even if it takes a while, there is a good reward waiting at the end of a long process. There is a lot of great journeys to take, and some of those aren’t in the literal sense. Watch some great videos and learn to use your imagination. Even if the world is a linear place for you, the mind is not.

AQUARIUS Jan. 20–Feb. 18

The past has a funny way of asserting itself during this time period. Recall the lessons and remember what made the good times worth it. In the end, learning from what you’ve been through is the best gift you can give yourself. Even if you’ve changed, the same old rules still apply.

PISCES Feb 19–Mar 19

It doesn’t really matter how hard you try, there is something that is not working out.

That’s okay as long as you are willing to make some changes. Ask yourself the hard questions and get into the swing of things. There is a chance you have to break something in order to put it back together. Q

34 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FINAL WORD

Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 319 | JANUARY, 2021

the perils of petunia pap smear

The tale of a new year’s kiss

BY PETUNIA PAP SMEAR

The road

to a New Year’s kiss is fraught with dan-

ger and excitement.

A few years ago, in preparation for the upcoming New Year’s Eve party at Club Try-Angles, I needed to put together a smashing new outfit. So, I was trying on all my ball gowns, trying to choose the perfect one, able to elicit a coveted kiss from some gorgeous hunk at the stroke of the new year. To my horror, I discovered that due to the change in the weather (that’s my story, and I’m sticking to it), my entire wardrobe had shrunken so much so that everything was fitting so snuggly that I resembled a snake shedding its skin.

After much trial and error and grunting and sweating and running mascara and swear words, I finally came to the very last ball gown in my collection. It also was excessively small and needed some structural enhancement to enable it to “contain” my holiday-enhanced voluptuousness. Armed with a hot glue gun, glitter grenades, and a Be-Dazzler, I can completely cover even the most modest of gowns with rhinestones and sequins faster than I can consume an 18-inch pizza (two minutes).

Thusly, I was able to insert a properly bedazzled maternity panel into the garment that would enable me to squeeze into it.

It became apparent that I needed to fashion a new pair of breasticles more suitable for formal occasions than any of my already existing 16 pairs. I entered “The Petunia Room” and sat down on the floor amid piles of rhinestones, glitter discarded batteries. I gazed at the “boobie shelf” where I store my assortment of breasticles and began singing my work song: “There’s thirty-two blinking boobs on the shelf, thirty-two boobs on the shelf, take one down and the batteries out, and there’s thirty-one blinking boobs on the shelf.”

In the wink of a beaded eyelash, I was able to fashion a stunning pair of technologically superior breasticles, complete with lighted spinning disco-balls. The rest of this story can best be told by quoting from scripture:

THE BOOK OF PAP SMEAR:

A

CHAP. II.

ND so it came to pass, that New Year’s Eve did arrive, and Club Try-Angles did send out a decree that all the world should party. And all went to party, everyone in his own car.

2 And Petunia, being great with disco breasticles, also went up from Chateau Pap Smear in Queertanic to the bar which is called Club Try-Angles.

3 And there were at the same bar hunky daddies abiding on the dance floor, keeping watch over the twinks by night. And lo, Gene Geiber came upon them, and the glory of Petunia’s disco breasticles shown round about them, And the twinks did back away, for they were sore afraid.

4 And Gene said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy. For unto you is delivered this night, a queen which is Petunia Pap Smear.

5 And so it was, that while she was there, the midnight hour was nearly upon them, and she should be delivered unto the twinky boys.

6 And this shall be a sign unto you; you shall find the queen wrapped in sequins and sitting upon a mangy stool.

7 And suddenly there was a multitude of the dancing boys praising her and counting down, five, four, three, two, one HAPPY NEW YEAR! 8 And it came to pass, as the twinks were throwing glitter and confetti, the cutest of all the boys was indeed mesmerized

This story leaves us with several important questions: 1. Was my ability to remodel a ball gown made possible by my internship with a circus tent manufacturer?

2. With my disco ball breasticles, should I offer to stand in for the ball drop in Times Square next year?

3. Is disco ball hypnosis the only way I can

by the sparkling disco breasticles and he delivered unto the queen a peck on the cheek.

9 And there came wise men, in from the patio saying, where is she that is queen of the Pap Smears. For we have seen the glow of her breasticles in the West and are come to wish her good tidings.

10 And when they saw her, they rejoiced with exceedingly great joy and presented her with gifts of glitter, rhinestones, and batteries.

11 And it came to pass that Petunia did grow weary, as it was much past her bedtime, and she did excuse herself from the festivities and did exit the bar alone.

12 And she did have a great fear of being pulled over by the centurions while wearing a sequined ball gown with disco breasticles; thus she did begin to change clothes in the parking lot, for there was no room in the loo.

13 And lo, she was unable to reach the zipper and was thus trapped inside the ball gown. Mightily she did struggle but to no avail.

14 A bar patron happened to be leaving and when he saw the struggling queen, passed by on the other side. So too, a lesbian when she came to the place and saw her, passed by as well.

15 But a drunken stranger, as he staggered towards the bar, saw her, and she called out to him, and he did stop and unzip her dress and then staggered on.

16 And thus, the blessed miracle of the ball gown Pass Over head did occur. get a cute boy to kiss me?

4. Is this the origin of Pass Over?

5. To properly observe Pass Over must you paint glitter over your door and prepare a buffet?

These and other eternal questions will be answered in future chapters of The Perils of Petunia Pap Smear.Q