Ruby Autumn 2015

Autumn 2015 the thinking women’s magazine

Naturally Beautiful Homes

A beautiful home starts with a Offering advice without expectation . .

Engaging the industries best architects Making dream homes a reality Creating lifestyles through. quality homes . years Inspirational designs for more than 25 That’s the Derbyshire Difference.

conversation...

Derbyshire 98 Pakington St, Geelong West 03 5221 8409 info@derbyshire.com.au www.derbyshire.com.au

THIS month, we ask some of the Ruby ladies:

What does family mean to you?

Abbey Sherwell Family to me = comfort zone, strong bonds, happiness and unconditional love.

It also means being apart, long distance phone calls, 2 parental homes, in-laws, new relationships, lots of old and new memories!

Judy Baulch Once my nine year old daughter created an acrostic poem about ‘family’ and for ‘L’ wrote, “Loves flows through my family.” She says family is your home and where you belong. I couldn’t put it better myself.

contents

06

34

Ruby Psychology

Ruby Spotlight

08

47

Ruby Tuesday

Ruby Food

14

50

Ruby Musings

Ruby Travel

17

56

Ruby Family

Ruby Competition

26

58

Ruby Business

Ruby Kids

32

66

Ruby Health

Ruby Book Club

RUBY is an Adcell Group publication.

We try to get out as many free copies as we can, but we know that they disappear faster than fairy bread at a 4th birthday party.

So if you can’t get your hands on a copy, why not subscribe for a guaranteed copy of your very own.

Anna-Marie Shew There’s room for everyone and their quirks in my family. We’re like a big, crazy Venn diagram and we drive each other nuts. But when you need them, they’re there. A family should lift your heart and nurture your soul, and tell you when your bum looks big in that.

Davina Montgomery Team Montgomery – those who appreciate my awesome dance moves, that I’m pushy for their own good, and are my reason for getting up in the morning … because they’re hungry, oh, and because the cat’s peed on the floor, again … Love ‘em like crazy!

‘Like’ us at MagazineRuby

Visit rubymagazine.com.au Today!

PUBLISHER Maureen Tayler ISSN: 1838-1456 MANAGER Caroline Tayler EDITOR Davina Montgomery davina@adcellgroup.com.au DESIGN Joanne Cook ADVERTISE IN RUBY MAGAZINE Abbey Sherwell M 0418 991 203 abbey@adcellgroup.com.au --Tanya Carroll M 0418 302 869 tanya@adcellgroup.com.au Adcell Group Geelong - Head Office T (03) 5221 4408 / F (03) 5221 3322 203 Malop Street, PO Box 491, Geelong, VIC 3220

rubymagazine.com.au 04 Ruby Autumn

ruby editor

We Will Be Heard It kept coming back to me that I hadn’t focused on violence against women and children in this issue when we have seen the announcement of a Royal Commission into Family Violence in Victoria, we’ve seen Rosie Batty named Australian of the Year, we’ve seen Chief Commission Ken Lay, another extraordinary leader in the battle against violence, announce his retirement. And we’ve heard about the horrifying stabbing death of 17 year-old Masa Vukotic in a Doncaster park.

Every time we hear or see or read or talk about these issues it hits, personally. Because, for 51 per cent of the population, we are all women – we’ve experienced violence, witnessed violence, survived violence or know a lot of women who have.

It’s always been there, but it was that thing that ‘we don’t talk about’. But that is changing.

We are the raped. We are the beaten. We are the sexually assaulted. We are paid less. We shoulder the burden of care.

We are the mothers. We are the sisters. We are the daughters.

We are the women of the house. We are the workers. We are the bosses. We are the domestic goddesses, the bitches, the saints and the whores. And we’ve had enough. We will no longer be silent and we will no longer be silenced.

For some of us, the horrors we’ve experienced have made us stronger, more resilient and more determined to fight for change. For some of us, those horrors have left indelible damage. And, for some of us, the legacy of those horrors has been too much to bear.

I say us, because this isn’t about women. Family violence, domestic violence, violence against women and children – whatever you call it, it isn’t a women’s issue. It never has been.

It’s always been a society issue, equally an issue for women, men and children, and we have no hope of making any difference to the status quo without treating it as such.

So no, you won’t find a story on family violence or violence against women or children in this issue of Ruby. There are so many stories to tell, and the Victorian Royal Commission into Family Violence will bring up many more. These stories will be told, here and elsewhere. But for now, I’ll try to keep a lid on my own anger, outrage and horror and let out some very deep, very personal thanks.

I want to say thank you to oh, so many people that I can’t possibly get them all in here, but here’s a start:

Thank you to Rosie Batty, and to the families of Jill Meagher and Masa Vukotic, and to everyone who has pushed through the pain, the grief, the horror and the outrage to make their voice heard, to tell their story in the hope they can prevent what happened to their family happening to someone else’s.

Thank you to Christine Nixon, to Simon Overland, to Tim Cartwright and most particularly to Ken Lay, all leaders at Victoria Police and all refusing to turn their back on domestic violence, but to lead the discussion with quiet strength, empathy, sense and compassion. Where you have led, others will have no choice but to follow.

Thank you to all the politicians who fought for this issue and delivered a Royal Commission into Family Violence. The truth will be heard.

Thank you to every journalist who has shared the stories of violence, of rape, of murder, of assault, that have led to this overwhelming and undeniable need for a Royal Commission and a response from governments at all levels.

Thank you to everyone who has, in ways large or small, kept the light shining on the issue of family violence and violence against women and children.

Thank you to everyone who has extended the hand of friendship, of care and of love to the raped, the beaten, the assaulted and the abused. It isn’t easy to step into these stories, to take on even a small part of the burden.

And lastly, thank you to all of good, kind, strong men who have wiped away the tears and wrapped their arms around the women and children in their lives and let them know how valued and cherished they are. The monsters are real, and we can’t fight them without you, all of you. We need you to help us drag them into the light for everyone to see.

Together we can win.

words davina montgomery

05 Ruby Autumn

ruby psychology

Got Away

The One That

06 Ruby Autumn

ruby psychology

I think we all have had the ‘one’ – the proverbial one that got away. Whether it was in recent times or eons ago, so many of us can secretly harbour the “what would it have been like if …” questions.

You can imagine my surprise when I came across a site devoted to a condition, which is now termed the ‘exaholic’ – Exaholics Anonymous.

This site is devoted to those who just can’t seem to get over their ex and need the support of a multitude of long suffering kindred spirits to cope. Silly me, I thought it was a natural response to feel really, really bad when love is lost. After all, ‘breaking up is hard to do’… Neill Sedaka told us that many years back, and we still find ourselves mouthing the words as we work through the shockwave that is the breakup. But, evidently, it can be now be pathologised. But, I’m darned if I can find the term ‘exaholic’ in my cache of psych books. Could it possibly be a conjured up condition?

Let’s take a step back. You thought the relationship was going along swimmingly and then the bolt from the blue – “Our dogs just don’t get along, I can’t see a future for us” or “You always nag me about taking the bins out, and I don’t think I can

minded online support group. Yep, that sounds like a plan, so put the tissue box away woman, help is at hand. Since this exaholic condition is likened to managing an addiction, we are encouraged to rollout and use a modified 12-step program – you need to be detoxed. Not to be confused with de-intoxicated, and I’m sure there has been a good deal of intoxication happening in the wake of the breakup.

The symptoms are readily identified: a craving to be in touch with the ex on any level; texting in the hope of a positive response - well any response would be appreciated; stalking on social media; and gleaning information from friends – any scrap of news is sought after, whether it be good or bad. No stone is left unturned as you interrogate your friends. Are you turning into someone you don’t even recognise? Oh, dear me, it seems of late that friends have a tendency to suggest, not so politely, that you get over it and pull yourself together – put on your big

‘He was probably a jerk anyway, but that’s not the point, you loved him. But it’s how you choose to manage the pain that counts.’ live with someone so demanding.” And then it was over. But, sadly, you saw a future and, in fact, you had expectations.

You had even honed those expectations before you met face-to-face and while you were still texting each other. He was perfect for you, and you had mapped out your life together. But whatever your scenario, it can be overwhelming when the axe from the ex falls so unexpectedly.

So, where does that leave you? Perhaps obsessing 24/7 about him, or just trying to accept the loss?

If it seems that you are obsessing then you are definitely in the exaholic category and in need of help from other obsessers, or is it obsessees? Anyway, no matter, what you need is an immediate overhaul to get you to a place of “neutrality” from a like-

girl pants and move on. Not what you have come to expect after their undying sympathy and devotion eighteen months ago when he dumped you! This is where Step 9 and 10 eventually come into play; you apologise and make amends for all those you have tortured throughout this ordeal. It’s evident that you are experiencing the addictive component of romantic love.

It seems the relationship is well and truly over, so how to move on and manage the compulsions that rule your life? This is where you put your faith in the eversupportive exaholic group, and you will need to adhere strictly to the 12-step program if there is to be any hope for you.

Well, as you’d expect, Step 1 is admitting you have a problem (no kidding!). The

subsequent steps suggest you have faith in this kindred network of unconditional support. Eventually, you will be able to admit you have many weird character flaws and will develop the power to heal and grow. Yes indeed, certainly sounds like a plan, however could all this selfindulgence with a bunch of enablers work to reinforce the cravings and addiction you struggle with? Well, it’s certainly a possibility from where I stand.

Aren’t we trying to extinguish those darn overdeveloped neural pathways in your over-stimulated brain, not reinforce them?

The catchcry at EA is ‘counting days’ because abstinence is a one-day at a time thing. You will log on religiously each day and be praised for your not-texting-the-ex effort. You will feel validated beyond belief (my words, not theirs) enough to maintain your behaviour change from being known as a miserable sod, to being someone who is admired for their fortitude. But, just remember, even if you don’t want to advertise it and share, the world is full of people just like you who are devastated when a relationship ends. And we all tend to misremember how amazing the relationship was – I think that’s called looking through rose-coloured glasses. He was probably a jerk anyway, but that’s not the point, you loved him. But it’s how you choose to manage the pain that counts.

However, and on a more serious note, a bad breakup can be a traumatic and a life-changing experience, no matter who you are, and particularly if there were other complicating factors. The grief and loss you feel will be very personal and individual. And yes, it will take time. No one can say how long. But if you feel your sense of loss is impacting on your daily life for an extended period, and good old EA is not your cup of tea, you may chose to take the time to speak with someone trained to help. What you are experiencing is a normal reaction.

By the way, you’ll know when you have made a full recovery when you think of your ex as someone you used to know.

words charmaine morse, psychologist, charmainemorse.com.au 07 Ruby Autumn

ruby tuesday

08 Ruby Autumn

ruby tuesday

Peeing on the Toilet Seat

and other Daily Disasters

There is a fine line between making the most of your time and leaving stuff to the last minute … and that line exists on the side where you haven’t ignored that pressing feeling while you just do that one more thing that the need to pee can be felt in your teeth.

Y

ou really know you’ve crossed the line when you finally make it to the (office, sorry girls) loo only to find that sense of immense relief turn to horror when you realise you didn’t stop to lift the lid. A very thorough (promise) clean of the area later and I was thankful that my pelvic floor had survived the joys of pregnancy and that I could still turn the tap off, so to speak.

This is all, sadly, de rigueur when you work, have kids, and are trying to manage all that while organising a trip away.

These are the days where there isn’t coffee enough in the world and there is no chance of an off-pedal moment to squeeze in a medicinal bevvy or two.

Although, given the bladder situation, perhaps it’s best that way.

I’m not someone who loves leaving things to the last minute. For instance, when we

in between running in and out of town because the kids had a growth spurt and, of course, dearly beloved and I needed stuff, and then there was the wedding we were heading to. My parents were travelling to the wedding separately, and that had meant almost daily phone calls from my Mum, who had nothing else to worry about so spent her days worrying about the flights I’d booked months ago, the accommodation that I’d booked and had paid for, the airport transfers that were booked, and those phone calls were followed by calls from my Dad asking me why Mum keeps calling him, wasn’t that the point of being divorced?

In the midst of all this, the school that we usually love and cherish decided to run a series of days and events that it absolutely isn’t mandatory for parents to attend. But when the resulting meltdown that comes

“there is a price to pay for this sort of mad addiction to doing stuff, and it can come with an uncomfortably damp should

feeling be

in

nothing

the but

nether empty

were building our house I was choosing cushions and kitchen door finishes while the plans were still being drawn up. I like to know what’s ahead and getting a start on it. The problem is, I’m also a yes person. As in, ‘Yes, I can do that. Of course, I’ll make it happen.’ And in my busy, hyperactive little mind I can - I can do it all. But there is a price to pay for this sort of mad addiction to doing stuff, and it can come with an uncomfortably damp feeling in the nether regions where there should be nothing but empty air and blessed relief.

On this particular day, I was just a few days from flying off with the family for our first proper holiday in years. It had meant a frantic few weeks of trying to finish the work for that month early, so I had some time to cover the work I wouldn’t be strapped to a laptop to do before I went,

regions air

and

where

there

blessed

relief.

when your kid is the only one in the class with no parent there takes longer to deal with than actually going in the first place, not to mention the guilt, and I already had that slightly tinkly feeling that warns that at any moment something is going to shatter, and it just might be me, well, I’d said yes, hadn’t I. In preparation of the interrupted day, I’d ripped out what I like to think were some pretty informative and thought-provoking articles – although buggered if I even know what they were about now – and made some really good progress through the five or so to-do lists I had written to cover work, kids, packing, wedding and holiday – raced to the school, smiled manically and was that over-excited Mum that other kids and parents watch out of the corner of their eye just in case she’s

about to blow. I hugged my little man, who is thankfully one of those people who skip through the world, oblivious to the chaos around them because somewhere there’s a magic place where Batman toys and Marvel movies are made, and I wonder what the next one will be? And, cursing my shoes that my youngest had assured me were the right ones for that day’s outfit (have I mentioned before that the more frantic my day is the more styled up I dress? I’m sure there is something pathological behind it, but I can’t turn to find it because my dress will crease and my shoes are already killing me) I clattered off to the car at what equates to Mach 3 in heels and zoomed back to the office.

And that’s when I realised I hadn’t stopped to pee, all day. I drink a lot of water, then there’s the morning coffee, and the cranberry juice … and that was all okay until I was within staggering distance of the loo and then that thing that was going to shatter turned out to be another kind of self-control.

So, there I was, post-horror moment, a picture of paper towel, disinfectant and shame, with a slightly annoyed-sounding voice in my head saying ‘Slow down’, ‘Stop’, ‘Take a break’. Oddly, it was my dearly beloved’s voice – but, then again, he is someone who considers 11am on a weekend early and a pathological sleeperinner (yep, that Lit degree is really paying off) of the type that we now think he was an overdue baby because he was holding on to his mother’s umbilical chord with both hands whilst mumbling in his tiny foetus brain, ‘Just another five minutes’.

And I think maybe the message is starting to sink in. Clearly, I’m not at my best when I’m trying to do everything at once. I need to take some time out for me.

Sure, sometimes making time for me means eating my leftover salad out of a ziplock bag in the car, sanz fork or dressing, having rescued it on my way out of the office on the way to school pick up, but the important thing is I’m making time for me …

words tuesday jones 09 Ruby Autumn

Fab fashion, local pa

The Australian fashion industry has been doing it tough in recent years. The rapid rise of low-cost imports, the high Aussie dollar hitting exports, the ongoing incursion of overseas fashion brands, and the decline of local textile, clothing and footwear industry have all taken their toll.

But one thing that has remained strong is our local fashion talent.

The Member for Geelong, Christine Couzens, has organised an event to highlight Aussie fashion and shine a light

10 Ruby Autumn

on up and coming local designers.

Ms Couzens said, “This event will show off locally designed and made fashion by Veducci. This is clothing that is affordable and made in our own Victorian patch.

Many women say that they would prefer to buy Australian made clothing to support local industry; however it is often difficult to find.

“We are pleased to have a great line up of special guests for this event, with a

fashion parade of the Veducci collection by owner/designer Kymlee, The Gordon School of Fashion students showing off their own designs, Michele O’Neil Secretary of the TCFUA, Catherine Andrews and Claire Yeatman from Minerva Community Services.”

Funds raised on the night are to be donated to Minerva Community Services, to assist the organisation in their support of women and children who have experienced family violence.

ruby fashion

ssion

Christine Couzens MP

Member for Geelong Invites you to

Support Aussie Made Fashion Date: 17th April 2015 Time: 6pm for 6.30pm start Venue: Berkeley Lodge 258 Pakington Street, Geelong West Entry: $40 per person.

Funds raised will be donated to Minerva Community Services www.minerva.org.au

Includes a Fun Fashion Parade The work undertaken by organisations such as Minerva Community Services is so important to our community,” Ms Couzens said. With the Royal Commission into Family Violence having commenced, she said, “this is an opportune time to highlight and support our valuable services such as Minerva and the work that they do for our local community.”

The event will be held on Friday 17th April 2015 at 6pm for 6.30pm start at Berkeley Lodge 258 Pakington Street Geelong West.

Tickets cost $40 per person, with finger food served throughout the evening and drinks at bar prices. Tickets are available from Christine Couzens Office on phone: 5221 3131.

Special Guests: Catherine Andrews, Michele O’Neil Secretary TCFUA, The Gordon Students, Kymlee Owner/Designer Veducci Fashion, Claire Yeatman Minerva Community Services Prepaid Tickets Only.

Tickets are available for purchase from Christine Couzens’ Office: 69a Pakington Street Geelong West.

Ph: 5221 3131 for further details.

Food provided, finger food served throughout the evening and drinks at bar prices.

11 Ruby Autumn

11.

ruby loves 6.

12.

5.

13.

Bags & Clutches 10.

7.

9.

Be inspired by this beautiful selection of bags and clutches - you’ll want to carry them everywhere you go!

4.

8.

1.

3.

2.

1. Eclectica (www.eclectica.com.au) 2. Blue Living Pratten Clutch $30 3. Blue Living Journie Botanical Reflections Satchel $98 Wallet $80 4. Frank and Dolly's (www.frankanddollys.com) Lucee Leather Clutch $79 5. Gypsy & Co (www.gypsyandco.com.au) Tribal Indian cross body bag $125 6. Gypsy & Co (www.gypsyandco.com.au) Babushka Orange Leather Bag $295 (set of 3 ­variety of colours) 7. Urban Stalker (www.urbanstalker.com.au) Sparkle Clutch set 8. Urban Stalker (www.urbanstalker.com.au) Nobody Bag and make-up bag set 9. Urban Stalker (www.urbanstalker.com.au) Black Clutch 10. Pink Elm (www.facebook.com/pinkelm) $45 11,12,13. Pink Elm (www.facebook.com/pinkelm) $35

12 Ruby Autumn

ruby insight

Remembering the sacrifices made Anne Drysdale and Caroline Newcomb gave their names to two of our suburbs, but their stories are completely unknown to most of us. I stumbled across them by chance last year and have since spent time learning about how they came to migrate from Scotland and London in the 1840s, met in the house of Dr Alexander Thomson and then set up in partnership as women squatters running properties on the Barwon River and the Bellarine.

Dr Mary De Garis is another woman who has had a huge impact on Geelong, but is barely known today. During World War I she was Chief Medical Officer of a 200-bed tent hospital in Macedonia, then became Geelong’s first female medical practitioner. At that time, Geelong Hospital did not have a maternity ward and Dr De Garis lobbied throughout the 1920s for one to be built. After its opening in 1931, Geelong benefited from greatly reduced maternal and infant mortality.

Many of us feel that our stories are insignificant when compared to extraordinary historical figures but this is a symptom of the way history has been created over time, with stories of daily life too often neglected and lost. Each

of us have amazing stories in our own families and sharing them can help us honour those who are no longer with us and teach new generations about the remarkable people they barely remember, or never knew.

My Pop, Ernest King, fought in Fromelles during World War I and my Poppa, Max King, served in Papua New Guinea during World War II. Our family would not exist today if they had not both come home safely and lived many more decades in Geelong, building their families and supporting the Geelong community.

Post A Poppy (www.postapoppy. com.au) is a community website with the purpose of commemorating and

honouring the service and sacrifice of Australian servicemen and women in all wars and peacekeeping operations. By remembering them by posting a poppy or through stories, letters, images and video we can ensure their memory will never be lost.

We encourage everyone to post a poppy or share their stories and memories, which will help continue to educate our community about the impact that War has on so many soldiers, their families, their friends and the nation.

Post A Poppy has been established to mark the centenary of the landing on Gallipoli and we hope it is around for generations to come so the sacrifices will never be forgotten.

words beth king, bking@kingsfunerals.com.au

13 Ruby Autumn

ruby musings

Weddings … one is enough I got married once. It was such a terrible experience that I have vowed to stay married ’til death us do part because I never ever want to go through that again!

I

am what you might call ‘very’ married.

Coincidentally, so is my husband. Back in 1977, I had returned home from my big trip overseas and to the bosom of my loving family. While I’d been away, Mum and Day had upped and moved from Geelong and headed for the hills. So home was now up Upwey way.

One dark and stormy night there was a knock on the door. I hauled our booming Irish setter watchdog away and opened the door, where stood Mr Tennis Club Secretary from the tennis club I’d just joined. More significantly, next to him stood Mr Tennis Club Secretary’s best mate. Best mate looked at me, and I looked at him and we fell instantly in love. Yes, it does happen!

From then, there was an ensuing actionpacked, drama-filled, often blissful time of 18 months that, if included here, would take up all of Ruby’s precious pixels, so I’ll cut to the chase. Literally.

By then, Mum, Dad and I had moved from Upwey to Parkville and ‘best mate’ and I were officially boyfriend and girlfriend. One fateful day there was a big row – we never rowed – and he quietly said he’d had enough. There was a thunderstorm happening, both figuratively and meteorologically, and he strode

14 Ruby Autumn

purposefully out into it. I heard his car start and drive away … I couldn’t bear it. I ran out into the rain and chased his car out of the carpark, banging on it and shouting, “No! Stop!”

The rain was torrential and I was drenched within seconds, but more than that, I was scared that I was about to lose the best best mate anyone could wish for. I had one chance; he stopped the car but still fixed his gaze straight ahead. I shouted through his closed car window, through the pouring rain, that I was sorry, really sorry, oh and would he marry me. He turned and looked at me. I said it again. “Marry me. Please will you marry me?” He wound down his window and he half smiled, half laughed and nodded and said, “Okay”.

And so, amidst the thunder and lightning and pouring rain and pure relief, I half climbed in through that car window to him and we sealed it with the most passionate, romantic kiss that ever was.

So, you’d think with romance like that throbbing through our veins that our wedding would be something pretty amazing, right? Wrong! Our wedding was awful.

First of all, I desperately wanted to get married on May Day, like my Mum and Dad had, 30 years earlier. That gave us a

mere six weeks until the big day, so the hurried invitations went out and everybody thought I must be pregnant. And the first of May 1979 was a Tuesday. So it would have to be an evening wedding, because most of the guests would be coming from work. And the church that we chose (actually, I chose it) was St Carthage’s in Royal Parade Parkville. Put all that together and you get a perfect storm of a wedding taking place in one of the blackest spots and worst times for peak hour traffic.

“Hurry up lass, you’re going to be late!”

Dad was yelling at me, not to get the school bus like he’d done every weekday morning between 1964 and 1975, but to get me into the wedding car. Just as we were about to walk out the door on time at 5.50pm, the phone rang. It was Uncle Frank and Uncle Harry calling from Manchester, wanting to wish me well and have a bit of natter, as they were wont to do. Finally, Dad took the phone from me saying, “Eh lads, she’s already late!” and hung up. We left. The usual five-minute drive took over half an hour.

Getting into the church was problematic too. For a start it was a clearway, so all our guests copped parking fines, which were fluttering on the windscreens like bridal ribbons. Plus, the automatic sprinklers had

ruby musings Anna-Marie Hughes’ wedding

come on so I had to hitch up my pristine frock and jump across the muddy nature strip amidst all the peak hour traffic tooting horns at me. I was 45 minutes late for my wedding and everyone was either cross, bored or convinced I’d done a runner. My beloved’s reproachful look still haunts me.

At last, actually inside the church, there was much talking, some crying and a lot of stifled giggles coming from the pews.

Poor Mum was minding my four yearold nephew. Laurie had recently started kindergarten and discovered that saying the F-word got a great response out of pretty much everybody who heard him.

He could impress his friends and shock his family all at the same time – and he did. He’d had many talkings-to and was on strict “no F-word” instructions for this special day. He had been very good until poor Mum – Grandma – thought she’d pre-empt anything by saying, “Now Laurie, Anna-Marie is going to be here and you know you must be very quiet.” Immediately, he started crying indignantly; “But Grandma, I didn’t say f*ck”, he howled.

The groom’s side of the church was filled with some frighteningly respectable and nostril-flaring people. Mum was mortified at the impression they were getting of the

usually socially acceptable Hughes family.

She leaned forward to quickly reassure Laurie, saying, “Yes, I know you didn’t say it, love. But don’t say anything at all.”

Behind them, six year-old nephew, Eddie, concerned at the goings on, leaned forward said, “What’s wrong with Laurie?”

Laurie loudly replied, “Grandma said I said f*ck, but I didn’t say f*ck,” and Eddie went out in support of his cousin saying, “I didn’t hear him say it, Grandma.”

Dad and I looked at each other. Even back in the entrance, we could hear Laurie proclaiming, as only an innocent kid can - for all the world to hear - “But I wasn’t going to say f*ck until you said it, Grandma!” My poor Mum. The organ started playing and Dad and I finally stepped forward on that long, long walk down the aisle towards the restless guests, annoyed priest and my grumpy groom. As we did, my three year-old niece, who had been angelically sitting beside Grandma, suddenly broke ranks and leaping out into the aisle followed us on her knees while holding her ankles up from behind, calling out, “Look at me, AnnaMwee! Laurie’s vewy bad. He said f*ck!”

Finally we each said “I do” and we trooped

outside where the guests discovered their parking tickets under their windscreens. A few tore the pretty pink paper slips up into little pieces and threw them at us along with the confetti ...

The reception was held in an old bluestone pub where boozy old homeless men, on their way to the conveniently located refuge nearby, snuck in and availed themselves to the open bar. Ah well, it didn’t matter. There was something for everyone on that crazy night.

We still don’t know who was responsible but the juke box got switched on and the first song that played was the classic love song guaranteed to stir the soul – “Up There Cazaly”. It filled the room and everyone enjoyed the joke and sang along.

We laughed when it finished, but then we heard the words again, “… Well you work to earn a living …” It played over and over.

We did everything we could to find out how to turn off that thing but couldn’t. It was possessed by the spirit of Mike Brady that still endures today and, 36 years on, whenever we hear it, we turn to each other, point rudely and say through gritted teeth: “Never ever marrying you again”.

words anna-marie hughes

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15 Ruby Autumn

ruby spotlight

Get your pink on … on top of a bun, that is Not every woman loves the colour pink – although any pyjama department between here and the Andromeda galaxy might suggest otherwise.

Regardless of your regard for the blushing hue, this May, pink is in, in a very special way. The Pink Bun Campaign is back from 11 May to 3 June.

In over 600 Bakers Delight bakeries across the country, bakers will roll up their sleeves and join forces with their local communities to help raise $1.5 million for Breast Cancer Network Australia (BCNA) by selling delightfully decadent pinkiced buns. And every cent of every pink bun sold during the campaign is donated to BCNA – now, doesn’t that make you feel better about that naughty afternoon snack?

This year, BCNA and Bakers Delight are also celebrating 15 years of working together to support families affected by breast cancer, with the partnership approaching $15 million in funds and pro-bono services donated to BCNA. Every day in Australia, 42 women will be told that they have breast cancer and every day 7 women will lose the battle with the disease.

elisha@elphotography.com.au 0439 353 958

elphotography.com.au

More than 15,600 women and 145 men will be diagnosed with breast cancer in 2015.

And while early detection programs and improved treatments have made an enormous difference in the battle against breast cancer, the war is far from over. The number of women diagnosed with breast cancer has actually increased by around 40 per cent over the last 15 years.

So, join the fight against breast cancer this May in what has to be one of the most colourful and delicious fundraising campaigns.

16 Ruby Autumn

ruby family

We arE Family

As we celebrate families during National Families Week in May, which coincides with the United Nations International Day of Families on May 15, Judy Baulch explores what makes a ‘ family’ in 2015.

How do you define a family? Mum, dad and 2.3 kids? People who are related to each other by blood? People who choose to be a family when they’re not related? Grandparents caring for grandchildren? Foster families? Adoptive families? Same sex families? Blended and step families? You and your pet?

Families are complicated. They can be messy and toxic. They involve hard-to-define concepts like loyalty, responsibility, love and tolerance. They can be the cause of great emotional and physical damage. They can be the source of immeasurable joy and

fulfilment. They are the keepers of shared stories and history. They are something we take for granted until they’re gone. They are the reason you keep talking to people you wouldn’t associate with if you didn’t share the same DNA or last name; they are the

cause of the annual stress fest called Christmas lunch.

Family - the word and the concept – has become highly politicised in the last couple of decades. Some people are trying to ‘protect’ families; the breakdown of families cops the blame for a range of social woes; and the needs of ‘working families’ tend to get a pretty good airing. The political and public definition of family leans heavily on the nuclear model – mum, dad and kids, even though the original couple may no longer live together and may, in fact, now have children with someone else. In fact, statistically, couple families are now the most common family type in Australia according to 2012 ABS figures, with

17 Ruby Autumn

ruby family

families with children coming a close second.

(although this excludes relatives beyond first cousins).”

While agreement on what a family is remains elusive, its definition for statistical purposes is clear and reflects the increasing diversity of Australian families in the 21st century.

The Australian Bureau of Statistics defines ‘household families’ as, “Two or more persons, one of whom is at least 15 years of age, who are related by blood, marriage (registered or de facto), adoption, step or fostering; and who are usually resident in the same household. The basis of a family is formed by identifying the presence of a couple relationship, lone parent-child relationship or other blood relationship.

Some households will, therefore, contain more than one family. (ABS, 2005b, para. 21)”.

In America, where the Census Bureau defines family as "a group of two people or more (one of whom is the householder) related by birth, marriage, or adoption and residing together,” a sociology professor at Indiana University and his team have charted Americans' evolving definition of family “and their recognition of unmarried couples, gay and straight, as a family” in a booklength study called, Counted Out: Same-Sex Relations and Americans' Definitions of Family, and a separate 2010 survey. Between 2003 and 2010, Professor Brian Powell and his team conducted three surveys involving more than 2,300 people and discovered that Americans are “moving away from a traditional definition of family … towards a modern definition of family.

According to the Australian Institute of Family Studies, under this ‘household family’ definition, “families may comprise: couples with or without co-resident children of any age; single parents with co-resident children of any age; grandparents caring for grandchildren; and other families of related adults, such as brothers or sisters living together, where no couple or parent-child relationship exists

18 Ruby Autumn

“However,

according

That includes a much greater array of living arrangements. They're including a much broader group of people, broader combination of people as families."

However, according to the study, how you are defined as a family has a lot to do with children, apparently, which hardly seems fair on childless couples, by choice or circumstance, who consider themselves a happy family of two.

As Powell’s study points out, the legal definition of family affects tax and welfare benefits, as well as raising guardianship issues, as many Australian grandparents raising grandchildren are only too well aware of, as are the non-biological parents in same-sex relationships.

Jane and Fiona, a Geelong couple who have been together for ten years,

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ruby family

this, that & more

encompass two of the many family types, same-sex and step, and have raised Fiona’s children from a previous relationship since Jack and Lily were nine and seven years old. They live a busy life with the normal pressures of running a business and household and living with teenagers. They are both close to their parents and siblings and spend a lot of time hanging out with extended family.

“Family to me means the intimate people I share my life with, they’re my heart,” Fiona says. “I don’t have to share the same DNA with them, but most of them I do. I guess it’s changed over the years, though, as it does when you have children.

And family doesn’t have to be related. Jane took on two children at the age of 40 and has always thought of them as her own. She gets quite annoyed when people refer to them as only my kids. They call her Second Mum and that’s how they think of her.”

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Market Square Shopping Centre Geelong (via Moorabool Street entrance)

03 5224 1455 www.venusflytrap.com.au

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Most of Jane and Fiona’s gay and lesbian friends have children – children they have had together through donors and children from previous relationships. Some of those children consider themselves lucky to have two mothers and two fathers. “At Jack and Lily’s primary school, there were several families in the same situation as ours so we were able to support each other,” Fiona says. “As they went to high school they realised our situation was different, but we handled that by saying we’re really proud of who we are and of our family, but you have to be truthful and respectful.”

Handbags, jewellery & gorgeous things

“I don’t think it really was an issue,” Jane says, “because we were far enough on the sidelines for the kids to figure it out and sort it out themselves. They never felt the need to make big announcements about their parents, they just invited people over and here we were. It just wasn’t a big deal.

“I think it’s adults who try to put different perceptions on it sometimes,” she adds. “We’ve never thought of it as any other way. We’re no different than any other family out there doing their stuff. And if you have that attitude then it doesn’t become political, it doesn’t become an issue.”

Unfortunately, there doesn’t appear to be an Australian equivalent of Brian Powell’s study, and statistical definitions can only define so much. Families are made of people and are as messy, complicated, happy, busy, supportive or toxic as the people in them. While lobby groups and governments talk about family policies and moralities, families of all shapes and sizes just get on with living their life.

www.gypsyandco.com.au www.facebook.com/pages/GYPSYand CO

Clearly, family is one of those amorphous terms, like love, that flows outside its prescribed definitions. Let’s agree with the sixty per cent of Americans in Powell’s study who believe that if you consider yourself to be a family, then you are.

words judy baulch

to advertise your services or products in “this, that & more” vplease email abbey at abbey@adcellgroup.com.au 19 Ruby Autumn

ruby health

Where do you come from?

We have some pretty random eggs in our family, and find ourselves often asking ‘Where do you come from?’

Sure, everyone thinks people in their family are a bit odd, but in our family, we’re not the only ones who think it.

Part of that, I suspect, comes from our genetic variances. You see, infertility and fertility issues are rife amongst our lot, particularly and on my Dad’s side.

In just my nuclear family, my brother is adopted and I am a donor baby of the era before you got to pick a donor from a resume, but instead came from a random unknown delivered via turkey baster.

My parents weren’t able to have kids the usual way, and that in itself must have been unimaginably hard in the 1970s, when everyone who wasn’t a pot-smoking barefoot traveller was cast in the mould of ‘get married, have kids’ – although, to be fair, some of my friends are the result of the pot-smoking barefoot travellers popping out babies as well.

The adoption route was the one most childless couples were steered down at that time. My brother was the ‘love child’ of a young woman who was too scared to tell her parents she was pregnant. It was a common story. At the time there was a long list of couples seeking to adopt, but after a few years of going through the process Mum and Dad got the call, there was a baby boy for them.

He was the first grandchild on both sides of the family and was adored, particularly by Dad’s parents.

A few years later, and having been told that since they now had one child, there was next to no chance of them

being able to adopt a second, Mum and Dad looked at other options. This led to Melbourne’s pioneering fertility clinic and what was Australia’s first donor sperm program (and, incidentally, was the same clinic that produced the world’s first IVF pregnancy). The program, as my family GP once joked, paid male medical students pretty well to do what they were doing all the time for free anyway. Too much information?

And, across the extended family, there are plenty of other stories. We’ve got cousins who were adopted, cousins born via IVF, cousins who were abandoned by their dads and one cracker of a great-aunt who was taken in as an orphan and went on to become the family matriarch. Actually, we’re pretty sure she was actually our greatgrandmother, but no one was game to talk about it in front of her, as it was all very hush, hush. What we do know for sure is that our great-grandfather was booted from the house by his immensely strong wife, who then moved with the still young teen, and the baby, to the country where she raised them both as a single mother.

It’s all very Days of Our Lives.

For us, there were few secrets and how we came to be a family was just another part of life. For the people who said things like, ‘Gosh, he must be adopted’ about my very tall brother (the rest of us are Oompa Loompa short), only to be told, dead pan, because it’s funnier that way, ‘Actually, yes, he is’ it always came as a bit of a shock. Telling people I was a sperm donor baby had them making that red-faced goldfish mouth expression that people get when they’ve

words tuesday jones 20 Ruby Autumn

accidentally hit on an uncomfortable truth and they don’t know what to say next. It’s the same face people make when they’ve congratulated a woman on being pregnant, only to be told that she’s not.

At a family wedding recently, my eight year-old son had the shock of his young life when my mum, who suffers from terrible verbal diarrhea, proceeded to tell him about his uncle being adopted over breakfast. To be honest, it’s such a normal part of my life that I hadn’t even thought about going through it all with the kids. My mistake!

Later that day, at my brother’s wedding, my son happily told guests that his uncle was my step-brother, because we’ve got a few step and half siblings too, but we just call them brother and sister because that’s how they feel to us. So I had to stop and have another conversation with the poor kid, who I’m sure was totally confused now – that no, his uncle was my very real, very full brother.

I’m not sure he completely got it, but one day very soon I’ll sit down and have the family talk with them, which will have to loosely include the sex talk because you just can’t explain it in any way that makes sense without that talk.

And one day, probably not that soon because there are only so many hours in the day, I’ll sign on to that voluntary registry and see if there are any medical history nasties on that medical student’s side … because every time I have to go in for a medical whatever they ask the question, ‘Do you have a family history of …?’

Family history? Do I ever!

ruby design

sparkly Artworks Jewellers and the Wood family are a bit of a Geelong Institution, they’ve been sparkling up Geelong since 1989. I sat down with Linda Wood to talk all things jewellery. I met Linda at the store and, my goodness what a beautiful old building, Linda explains to me that it once was a State Bank. I automatically warmed to Linda, she was one of those people who you knew was just a genuinely nice person. She welcomed me into the store and we tucked ourselves away in one of the consulting rooms. As we spoke, the sound of a busy workshop hummed in the background.

MAKE YOUR

A

rtworks Jewellers create custom design pieces for their customers, a service that is few and far between. They will make your piece to order and will guide you through the design process to help you create something that you’ll love and that’s also within your budget. Linda tells me that this last part is key and it’s important to them to be honest with their customers in regards to style and price. “Our job is to make something that our customers want, that is within their budget too.” Linda says that is equally as important that they stay up to date with current trends and fashions so they can pass this information onto their customers. “What was in fifteen years ago might not be what’s in fashion now, but a solitaire [she reassures me] will always be in fashion”.

COME TRUE

 

The team behind Artworks Jewellers is pretty impressive to say the least. Brett Wood who began Artworks Jewellers in 1989 has over forty-two years experience as a jeweller, gemologist, valuer and is Dear .................................. an expert in diamond technology. Linda Wood takes care of “behind It’s time to give a little TLC to your beauti the scenes business matters” ably assisted by Michelle. Their eldest Dear .................................. son George works full time at the store and is in his third year of his ..................................................................................

It’s time to give a little TLC to your beautiful apprenticeship. Their youngest son, who is still at university takes care of all of the IT and the technical side of things. Then there’s Please call .............................. Today to book .....................................................................................................

Free clean, check and polish to make sure everything Lynda Scott, gemmologist, diamond technologist and registered valuer, who has over 35 years experience in the industry. She has (03)in5223 Please call .............................. Today to book your 2800  been at Artworks for 15 years taking care of the valuing, and also has Free clean, check and polish  to make sure everything is looking great! the amazing job of sourcing all the gems. Talk about the best gig on  (03) 5223 2800  earth! Mardi or Aunty Mardi as she is affectionately referred to by the  Wood family has been with Artworks Jewellers for twenty four years,  in fact Mardi underwent her apprenticeship with Artworks whilst Sue and Martine work front of house and are always up for a chat. Jake, 135 Pakington Street, Geelong West the newest member to join the team recently moved from Queensland www.artworksjewellers.com.au www.facebook.com/artworksjewellers with his wife and two month old baby to work with Artworks Jewellers.

135 Pakington Street, Geelong West Phone 5223 2800 135 Pakington Street, “It’s great to have someone young and another guy on the team, as www.artworksjewellers.com.au before it was very female oriented, it’s a bit more balanced now.” Linda www.facebook.com/artworksjewellers Geelong West giggles and tells me that Jake has a motto, when they ask “Jake, what are you doing?” He replies “making women happy!”



 with

 

Next time you’re strolling along Pakington St, are after a beautiful piece of custom made jewellery or just want to spoil yourself or someone you love, pop in and say hello to the team.

52 232 800

www.artworksjewellers.com.au

words montana agustin 21 Ruby Autumn

ruby spotlight

Infidelity: an insider’s perspective Are you a late night television watcher? If you are, you may have seen some eyebrow raising ads from a dating agency with a difference – this one is purely for attached people looking to cheat.

V

ictoria Milan is a social network for men and women seeking a secret affair. Formed by a married media executive, Sigurd Vedal in 2010, today the service has more than 5 million members spread across more than 33 countries, making it hard to argue with the demand.

We all know there’s nothing new about cheating, but one thing the Victoria Milan service does is openly share insights into why its members are looking for a little ‘some’in some’in’ on the side. Including this pearler of a survey, conducted amongst the service’s single women members: “Infidelity: Top 10 Reasons Why Single Women Like to Go after Married Men” According to the survey, 30 per cent of the Aussie women registered on the extramarital dating site are actually single women looking for married men. When asked why, the women’s responses formed along the lines of: “married men provide excitement, better sex and have more

22 Ruby Autumn

experience than single men.”

•

‘No strings attached’ (6%)

But it’s not all one-way traffic. Of the Aussie women registered on the site, just over 40 per cent are married and a further 25 per cent are in a stable relationship.

•

‘The thrill of sin’ (5%)

But when it comes to single ladies seeking married men, here’s the top ten reasons why they rate the taken blokes over the singles: •

‘More excitement’ (17%)

•

‘Better sex’ (14%)

•

‘More experience and self-confidence’ (12%)

•

‘No demands or expectations’ (11%)

•

‘The challenge of taking someone else’s men’ (10%)

•

‘No families involved’ (9%)

•

‘True appreciation of attention and efforts’ (8%)

•

‘Luxury and eroticism’ (8%)

Founder and CEO of Victoria Milan, Sigurd Vedal, released some comments announcing the survey’s findings, saying the results ‘show that people always want what they can’t – or aren’t supposed to – have.’

“Our female members tell us that extramarital affairs are not about the challenge of sleeping with a married man, the freedom of no-strings-attached or expensive gifts and dinners.

“This is purely about having a great time with someone looking for the same thing: excitement, sex and a level of experience to make it great. It just so happens that married men are more likely to have these qualities than single men,” Mr Vedal said.

Wonder if the men’s wives would agree … * Survey information source: http://www.victoriamilan.com

ruby fashion

PASS THE MAGNIFYING GLASS, PLEASE HELP – I need longer arms … or perhaps it’s time for (GASP) multifocals!

I’ve noticed gradually over the last few months that the labels on packages are becoming a lot harder to read. Why on earth do the food companies have to use such bloody small font sizes? Damn them!

I find myself holding the packet or whatever it may be close up but then need to move it further and further away until my arm is completely outstretched to try and make out the miniscule 1pt type on the label. I thought there was a law that type sizes couldn’t be printed below 5pt? If not, there should be.

So, off to Eyewear on Pako I trot to have my eyes tested. Secretly, I’m hoping that my eyes are just a tad tired (like the rest of me) or perhaps hayfever has hit early this year (in March - doubtful) and that’s the cause of my problem. Wishful thinking?

Surely it’s not a sign of … dare I say it (GASP AGAIN) old age!

Nooooooooo!

I remember teasing Mum when she used to struggle to read the fine print.

“What’s the matter Mum aren’t your arms long enough?” Talk about the karma bus heading right back at me!

After my eye exam, Peter, my quietly spoken, polite optometrist, comfortingly reassured me that it’s quite normal for – how did he put it “ladies of my maturity” (meaning forty-cough-six) to start having trouble with focussing on the small print and that what I was experiencing was standard.

Needless to say, I’ve decided to wait a while before I go down the multifocals path. I’m sure won’t be that far away, but I just need to get my head around it first. In the meantime, I’ve found a cute little magnifying glass to get me by in times of need (obviously, whilst hiding in the privacy of my own pantry so I don’t look like a twit!).

One good thing to come out of it was at least my eyes, although gradually getting older like the rest of my body, are still healthy – and that’s good peace of mind.

Oh, and I’ve also worked out how to make the text size bigger on my phone. Winner!

Find us on facebook Find us on facebook @eyewearonpako @eyewearonpako

words tanya carroll 23 Ruby Autumn

Present

Show me the Shopping!

Geelong’s first wholesale direct to public outlet expands operations

G

iftware, homewares and décor for true wholesale prices? Yes! It’s Geelong’s best-kept homewares secret and it’s a retail therapist’s dream come true. Innovative Geelong company, Past Last and Present, opened its doors just over 12 months ago in a quirky little warehouse in Breakwater.

Due to popularity, the emporium recently moved to a much bigger warehouse over the road into space more than four times the original size. The all-new Past Last and Present locale is 51 Leather Street, Breakwater, boasts easy parking and an entire warehouse full of stock onsite and ready to tantalise, inspire and load into your car.

To celebrate the grand opening of the new premises, Past Last and Present will reveal its exciting new Retro Collection of furniture amongst a host of other items. This new Retro range features stunning 60’s inspired couches, chairs and foot stools – think of a slick black couch called Elvis, another which is red with white piping and orange buttons and another which is black with white piping and pops of colourful buttons - all with authentic birch wood retro feet sloping out to the side. Other items include a fantastic array of clocks – big and small, a multitude of frames to suit all purposes and colour schemes, an abundance of rustic and shabby chic, children’s feature pieces and furniture, as well as general décor items.

The hundreds of items available ensure there really is something for everyone, it’s a virtual treasure trove of samples, surprises

and seconds of all forms and sizes with prices ranging from $1 to $400.

Store Manager, Sue di Sciascio, says more and more people are discovering this great Geelong shopping outlet.

“It’s exciting to be able to offer Geelong shoppers quality at way below retail prices – some items are more than 60% off standard retail and I’m continually thrilled by the smiles on customer’s faces once they come and see for themselves – literally, they can’t believe there could be such a difference in price for the exact same quality!”

“I’ve even got one regular who comes over every month from Tasmania in his van to load up!”

Sue says the new premise will not only facilitate further expansion – and more great new products, it will also enable better display of items and ensure visiting is an enjoyable, relaxing experience.

“It was getting very congested in our former location, so it will be wonderful to be able to display our many ranges in a more aesthetic and spacious setting.”

According to Sue, Past Last and Present is gaining a solid flock of Facebook followers who enjoy being prompted about new releases and specials.

“Some items are extremely limited so when new items arrive, those who already know us often rush in to avoid disappointment.

Past Last and Present is open Monday – Friday from 10am – 3pm.

25 Ruby Autumn

ruby business

Never stop learning

Business resolutions for 2015 The new year, both calendar and financial, is always a great opportunity for business owners to take a step back and think about what they can do to improve on previous years. As my business undertakes its planning as a team for the coming 12 months I thought I’ d share with you some insights.

S

ometimes, the answers are glaringly obvious, but in other instances, you may have to think a little outside the box. Even if you are entirely satisfied with your business’s performance, it is no excuse to rest on your laurels. Circumstances beyond your control can impact your business’s viability, so you need to remain vigilant.

Furthermore, there is always room for improvements in every business, so you should never feel that you have nothing left to work on.

Here are our top five business resolutions for business owners in 2015: Rethink your social media marketing With all the hype surrounding social media marketing, it is not uncommon for businesses to fall into the trap of

making social media content for its own sake. This can be a costly mistake, and may even damage your brand in some circumstances. Concentrate on making sure that your social media marketing is informative, creative, and, most importantly, reaching the right audience.

Share your vision If you have a vision for your business you should share it with your employees.

Allowing your staff to participate in the realisation of planned goals will give them a sense of accomplishment and promote job satisfaction. Employees who are satisfied in their roles are generally more productive and are also more likely to remain in their positions for a longer period.

Even the self-employed can always benefit from a little extra training. By attending seminars, short courses, or even just reading relevant books you can make a huge difference to your business.

Think about the area of your business that you are the least confident in, for example, marketing or IT, and make the decision to improve your knowledge.

Get organised A great way to start improving your organisation is by writing to-do lists. You should begin by listing long-term goals, and then slowly breaking them down into smaller tasks. If you do this, tasks will seem far more manageable, and you will be able to create a realistic timeline for completion.

Build your dream team At the end of the day, the success of any business will be determined by its people. Of course, it is important to hire the right people at the right time.

However, the thing that will ultimately allow your people to take your business to new levels of success is the ability to work together effectively. If your staff members have good communication channels and productive working relationships with one another, it can make a significant positive impact on your business’s productivity. In 2015, put a little bit of extra time and energy into promoting team collaboration in your business.

DISCLAIMER: This article is for guidance only, and professional advice should be obtained before acting on any information contained herein. Neither the writer, publishers nor the distributors can accept any responsibility for loss occasioned to any person as a result of action taken or refrained from in consequence of the contents of this article. Liability limited by a scheme approved under Professional Standards Legislation.

words renée jovic, owner & managing accountant, jovic accounting pty ltd

Specialised Services

Renée Jovic

• Property Investment • Accounting • Taxation • Business Solutions

80 Pakington Street, Geelong West E: admin@jovicaccounting.com.au P: 03 5222 6962

“Providing Solutions to Businesses, Individuals and Property Investors.

With a Personal Approach”

Web: www.jovicaccounting.com.au and www.bantacs.com.au

26 Ruby Autumn

ruby real estate

Time to Move?

Moving home is an opportunity to clear out the old stuff.

You think you are going to just do it this time, get rid of the old cot, the encyclopaedias that nobody knows how to use anymore, just a big de-clutter so you can move into your new home and start all over again.

There’s a bigger picture at stake though, so many variables to think about. Where are you going to move to? I mean do the

kids really need an education? Umm, yes.

So you need to be close to educational facilities, public transport routes. What about you, what do you need?

Think carefully about what you want in your next house; number of bedrooms, bathrooms, living areas. Take into consideration the ages of your family members, activities you may need to

access, the space for you to take some time out from the hustle and bustle of Life.

Whether thinking about renting or purchasing, think about your budget when making the next move. Ensure you can afford the house that ticks all your boxes and remember that it’s you and your family that make the house your home.

words gina tobolov, westendrealestate.com.au

27 Ruby Autumn

ruby arts

Barry Feldman

international photography salon

From 28 March, Geelong Gallery will present the 18th VIGEX international photography salon 2015, a popular exhibition featuring 71 works by 55 photographers from 10 countries (including works by five photographers from the Geelong region).

VIGEX (an abbreviation of Victoria Geelong Exhibition) is a biennial competition, which receives thousands of entries from around the world.

Established in 1980, VIGEX is one of only two international photographic competitions in Australia accredited by the Federation Internationale de l’Art Photographique (FIAP), Australian Photographic Society (APS) and the Photographic Society of America (PSA). VIGEX is the only international salon in Australia that invites and judges print photography entries (as opposed to digital photography entries).

Barry Feldman

Gerry van der Meer

In 2015, 1,820 prints were judged in the following categories: Monochrome Open, Colour Open, Nature, Photojournalism, People, and Creative.

A panel of nine leading photographers in their fields judged this year’s entries. In total, 154 photographers from 19 countries entered the VIGEX competition.

Graeme Buckland Barry Feldman

28 March to 3 May 2015 Geelong Gallery Free entry—Open daily 10am to 5pm Closed on Good Friday

28 Ruby Autumn

Graeme Buckland

Margaret Metcalfe

ruby spotlight This flipbook was created in the hope it will inspire women to learn to love themselves after having a baby and embrace all the physical changes.

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he 365 Day Project is the brain child of local mum and perinatal emotional health advocate, Maddison Gore. Bringing together 450 women from Geelong, Melbourne, Ballarat and Surf Coast who bravely got their gear off in an effort to reduce stigmas related to body image and mental illness, the beautiful images have been launched in a flipbook. Maddison is aiming to raise over $15,000 for the Perinatal Emotional Health Program at Barwon Health through sales of the book.

The calendar flipbook features 365 photos of women in their underwear, with and without their children, celebrating their bodies post baby. The book was created with 20 photographers, 50 hair and make up artists and numerous other Victorian businesses that have all come together for this heart-warming cause.

The Perinatal Emotional Health Program at Barwon Health is a free home based service for women and their families

experiencing emotional difficulty during pregnancy and after the birth of a baby.

“Throughout pregnancy our bodies go through tremendous physical and emotional changes. This flipbook was created in the hope it will inspire women to learn to love themselves after having a baby and embrace all the physical changes, as well as make it OK to not be OK,” Maddison said.

“Every woman at some stage has felt inadequate, has sat on her floor upset because she can’t find something to wear or doesn’t like the way she looks, or hasn’t wanted to be intimate with her partner because she doesn’t feel sexy or beautiful. This flipbook is dedicated to all of the women who have ever felt they are alone, felt they are not good enough, ashamed of their body, upset by the way they look, struggled with their mental or have had a bad day.”

The 365 Day flipbook can be purchased at http://365dayproject. bigcartel.com or at www.365dayproject.org.au.

Images by VS Photography & Design

29 Ruby Autumn

ruby living

Marsala anyone?

So, the colour of the year goes to “Marsala” pantone 18 -1438.

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his colour has been described as complex and full bodied – rather like a good red wine - which funnily enough is the origin of where the name comes from – a region in Italy that produces a fortified wine of the same name. (I’m sure my Nanna used to keep a bottle in the cupboard).

In the words of Leatrice Eisemen, the colour Marsala “enriches the mind, body & soul, exuding confidence and stability”.

Eiseman is executive director at The Pantone Colour Institute, the worlds leading experts on colour, so it’s her job to know about these things.

The announcement has been met with mixed reviews in the media – with many favoring last years colour of “Radiant Orchid”.

Whilst ‘Marsala’ is vastly different to its predecessor, I have to admit to feeling a little more favorable towards it when it comes

to home decorating – “radiant orchid” just doesn’t cut it for me as a decor colour.

Marsala is an unusual shade, not quite red, brown or purple, rather seeming to be a blend of all three.

So how will Marsala make it into our homes?

If Eisemen’s predictions are right it will be through fabrics and textures, along with paint colours.

She’s suggesting dining rooms and kitchen, where it should stimulate our appetites, be combined with metallics and then used for accessories such as plush towels in bathrooms.

Colour is a very subjective and personal thing.

Trends do come and go – and often colour trends change very quickly – so they can date an interior. My advice is to use caution in your decorating with colour – introduce it in small amounts and on accessories that are easily changed.

Marsala will be a great colour for the cooler months – as its warm and earthy, invoking a sense of nurture.

I’m thinking we will see it across a range of fabrics, but mostly in velvets and possibly even shiny sateens, which are perfect for cosy cushions and throws. Adding colour and texture through the use of fabrics will really add an extra dimension to your decorating, without too much expense.

Teamed with metallics of gold and copper, Marsala has the ability to ooze glamour and sophistication.

If that’s not your decorating style, I suggest partnering it with some fun colours of teals, blue greens or even orange tones. Mix it up a bit – you could be pleasantly surprised with what colour combinations do actually work.

Happy decorating.

words cal stewart 31 Ruby Autumn

Life beyond the nuclear family Marital breakup occurs in about 50% of relationships, so it is pretty normal. You are not a failure, and you are not now a troubled or a broken family!

Whilst breakup is painful, there is life beyond the nuclear family, and it can be exciting, positive and enriching for all involved. We just have to get over the huge hurdle of letting go of the dreams and the future which we thought was ours.

Your children’s safety is the highest priority and if either parent is a danger to a child, this needs to be dealt with through the police or child protection services.

Marital breakup can cause pain, anger, hurt, mistrust and grief. It is a realization of broken dreams and broken promises. And we have to try to get through this grief and minimize the damage to our children and our relationship with their other parent. Realistically, you will know this person for the rest of your lives as you are both the parents of your children.

Firstly it is important to trust your children to be a lot smarter than you think, and they have to make their own decisions about their future relationship with the “other� parent; your opinion will not necessarily help them, as your hurt is yours, they too may be hurt but

www.kardiniahealth.com.au 32 Ruby Autumn

ruby health their hurt is different to yours. It is very difficult to be objective and unbiased at a time when you are reeling with hurt and loss.

Secondly whilst the grief and the pain are very real, it is important to try to move through that, look for the positives and establish a routine for your children where they can see their other parent in a non conflictual and peaceful way. Of course it hurts when your children say they want to be with their other parent, but put your own feelings aside, and isn’t it good they have two parents who they like to be with?

Finally, this type of loss is enormous, so look for support, seek counseling for yourself and your children, share childcare with your friends, family and neighbours, and nurture yourself through this difficult time. It’s ok not to be supermum or superdad all the time. The best lesson we can teach our own children is about acknowledging our own emotions and how to deal with them in a mature and calm way.

There is not one correct way to deal with a marital breakup, it will be different for everyone; but the aim is to reach a point as quickly as possible where your children can continue to see and enjoy both their parents, where they can feel safe all the time, where they can

“There is not one correct way to deal with a marital breakup, it will be different for everyone; but the aim is to reach a point as quickly as possible where your children can continue to see and enjoy both their parents,”

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And when parents re partner, this is a wonderful opportunity to have other adults in the mix, with all their personal foibles to add to the varied tapestry of your child’s world. As any sole parent will testify, it can be great when the kids are off with the other parent and you are free to enjoy some adult time and re discover your own life.

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No two adults are the same and no two adults parent the same. It is ok and the kids will cope with learning this is how it works at dad’s or mum’s place. Equally if parents are together, it is ok to do things differently. It is wonderful for children to learn through their own experiences, that there are many different opinions and attitudes and ways of doing things. This will help to create more adaptive and flexible adults.

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know that both their parents love them and want the best for them. It is wonderful when both parents can attend special events with their children and when both parents can discuss parenting and make decisions together about their children’s future. Like it or not, you are both the parents of your wonderful children.

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Be honest with yourself and your children and do your best to move through the loss and get to the point where you can enjoy “life beyond the nuclear family”.

words by dr lou sanderson 33 Ruby Autumn

ruby spotlight

The Science

of HAPPINESS W

e all strive for happiness in our everyday lives; through the little things we do each day to the big milestones we strive towards. What if now there was a guide to get help you get there, a handbook if you will? That’s what the Wholebeing Institute, positive psychology and the science of happiness is all about.

I sat down with Megan McDonough, the CEO of the Wholebeing Institute, to discover what exactly science of happiness was, how Megan found herself as the CEO of the Wholebeing Institute and general happinessrelated things. It was pretty great to talk to someone for an hour just about happiness; maybe if we all spent an hour a day chatting about happiness we might all be that little bit happier.

So, what does someone in the industry of Positive Psychology Education find herself doing all day, besides the obvious of being happy? Megan’s typical day can vary greatly, some days she’s doing back-to-back interviews with people who are curious to find out as much as they can about the Wholebeing Institute and what exactly a Certificate in Positive Psychology means, and other days she’s reaching out to individuals, community groups and organisations to see how positive psychology can help them. It’s for the latter reason that Megan found herself at Geelong Grammar, she was here to launch the first location in Australia to offer the course, which means that Geelong Grammar is now also recognised as a world leader in Positive Psychology Education. Megan said was was thrilled to be here and passing on the message of wellbeing and happiness to Australians.

Bur really, it doesn’t matter what she is

doing on a daily basis, Megan says that everyday is rewarding “I won’t kid you, sometimes I have to pinch myself and I think really, is this a job?” For Megan this is key in not only her own life, but also in the message she is spreading.

“No matter what work you do, whether it’s raising a child, helping your elderly parents, being a CEO, a manager, a writer or a reporter, whatever it is that you choose to do, that you find the meaning and purpose in the work, as it will continue to fulfil and engage you.”

Megan began her career in traditional healthcare with a degree in Nuclear Medicine, a type of diagnostic imaging, and she found herself constantly seeking out what was psychically wrong with a patient, rather than what was working well. Her entire career had been filled with diagnosing patients with cancer, liver problems, heart conditions and always looking at “what wasn’t working.”

It was around this time that Megan began to take Yoga classes, a practice she would eventually end up teaching.

She found that Yoga encouraged her to look at things with a more balanced and holistic view and she discovered the power of the mind body connection.

“It made me think, how do we bring the stuff that’s working into our everyday life.” It was with this that Megan started her own online learning business in 2000, it was soon after this that she met Dr. Tal Ben-Shahar, the creator academically and scholarly of the Certificate in Positive Psychology.

“We had such a transformative experience together running that first program in the United States that we decided to start to the Wholebeing Institute.” Megan believes that it was their difference in approach to words montana agustin

34 Ruby Autumn

reach the same goal that made the partnership work so well.

The Certificate in Positive Psychology is gaining popularity fast. Each program has sold out to 175 students, with a bigger waiting list every year. The word of mouth is getting so loud that it has now reached Australia, and, so far, we are the only other country where the course is offered.

We’re all pursuing happiness in some form or other, but I wondered, what kind of people are taking a course in the happiness? “It would make life a lot easier if there were a niche market, but it’s such an open program that it creates a diversity in the audience,” Megan said. From managing directors to mothers and everyday people who are facing a challenge, like that of the loss of a spouse or child. The course structure itself is based around the rigours of science and good research, meaning that it’s easily applicable and also relevant to every walk of life and in every situation.

I’ll admit, I had no idea what positive psychology was, and I certainly didn’t know you could take a course in happiness prior to my interview with Megan, but everything she said seemed to make sense and it seemed so simple too. Positive Psychology and the science of happiness isn’t about chasing happiness, it’s about using your enthusiasm, curiosity, love of learning and positivity to enliven and enrich your life. It’s about balance, being in the moment and practicing mindfulness for a better and more balanced life.

It seems so simple, yet so hard all at once…

Want to know more? You can find it at http://wholebeinginstitute.com

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35 Ruby Autumn

ruby health

Two Women’s Stories of The Vag Gadge In April, Dr Ian Holten and Dr Rafael Acosta’s Australian Skin Face Body clinic in Geelong will start providing MonaLisa Touch fractional laser therapy for women experiencing vaginal discomfort or issues.

Vulvo-vaginal atrophy is the medical term for what are typically the vaginal symptoms of menopause (as experienced by four in ten menopausal or post-menopausal women) with symptoms including a thinning and loss of elasticity of the vaginal walls and significant loss of the vagina’s natural lubrication.

In fact, there are a whole host of reasons why our lady parts can cease functioning normally. There are issues relating to childbirth, menopause, cancer treatments and other illness and disorders. And while there are surgical options available to alleviate some, if not all of these issues, the MonaLisa Touch therapy uses non-surgical, minimally invasive CO2 laser treatment and specialists are some seeing spectacular results and some very happy women.

The therapy, that we introduced in the last issue of Ruby, uses the same laser technology that is used to treat acne, scarring and to revitalise ageing skin.

But this magic wand, that I have had described to me as ‘the Vag Gadge’ doesn’t bring vitality back to faces, it brings it back to … well … you get it, right?

36 Ruby Autumn

Rae’s ‘Designer Vagina’ In December 2013, Rae knew something was up. She was experiencing some rectal bleeding. Rae has Von Willebrand disease, a genetic disorder that affects her blood’s ability to clot. She is, she says, a bleeder anyway, but this felt different and she went to have it checked out.

Her doctor found a small polyp, and both Rae and her doctor were shocked when the routine test results came back with a diagnosis of early stage HPV (human papillomavirus) – what Rae had was cancer.

The good news was that they had caught it early. Rae underwent a six-week course of radical treatment, including two 5-day courses of chemotherapy and thirty radiation sessions. The treatment knocked the cancer on the head and Rae was back to work after three months. It was a good outcome.

Starting to get her life back to normal, Rae and her husband were ready to get back on the proverbial horse only to find it wasn’t working. The radiation had burnt the structures inside Rae’s vagina, causing collapse and the fusion of ligaments. She was left with a 2cm wide vaginal cavity.

What made it worse was that Rae was never told that this might be a side effect of the radiation treatment. And

while she was philosophical about it, figuring that if the treatment that saved her life meant she lost her sex life, that was something she could deal with, at just 46 years-old, she wasn’t ready to just give up. A visit to Dr Fariba BehniaWillison, gave Rae new hope.

“Fariba nearly cried when she saw the damage the radiation had done to me, but she said she could fix it,” Rae recalled.

As it turned out, while the treatment had been used to help breast cancer patients experiencing vulvo-vaginal atrophy, Rae’s case was the first time this therapy had been used to treat symptoms resulting from her form of cancer. Having expected she would need surgery, Rae said she couldn’t believe how easy and non-invasive the laser therapy was, “less than having a pap-smear” is her description.

“My husband and daughter would say, ‘Oh, you’re going back for you designer vagina,” Rae laughed.

And after three treatments, spaced over eight weeks, Rae was back to normal, putting an even bigger smile on her husband’s face. It was initially thought Rae would need an initial course of five treatments, but after the third, it was business as usual. However, because the radiation damage was so severe, Rae returns for regular three-monthly treatments.

ruby health “You know that feeling when you buy a really great face cream and your skin looks and feels amazing? That’s what I feel MonaLisa has done for me. I feel great!” Rae said. “It’s something I would have had to have done at some point as I got older anyway. I was starting to get a bit of bladder weakening, you know, the usual stuff you get over time when you’ve had kids, but that’s all back to normal now too.”

The only downside for Rae is that having undergone expensive cancer treatment,

Kristy’s ‘Life Changer’ At just 27 years old, Kristy has had a seriously tough few years. Kristy has endometriosis, a condition in which the tissue that normally lines the uterus grows outside of it causing severe pelvic pain and, often, infertility. In 2011, her condition worsened. She was in severe pain and it was found that part of her bowel had adhered to her cervix.

A ten-centimetre piece of Kristy’s lower bowel was removed and, following the bowel resection, she was fitted with a

there are a whole host of reasons why our lady parts can cease functioning normally. There are issues relating to childbirth, menopause, cancer treatments and other illness and disorders

the regular MonaLisa treatments is an expense she would rather not have. But the results are too good for her to stop.

And perhaps, since Viagra is funded as an erectile dysfunction treatment, perhaps proven female sexual disorder therapies could too. But it’s going to take a lot more women calling for it for that to happen.

“If woman could have this treatment funded like they are just having a pap smear, imagine how many happy couples there would be out there? It can give woman their confidence back and even some of their mojo."

colostomy bag. But a later surgery to reverse the colostomy bag left Kristy with an open wound and very severe pelvic pain. Over the next six months, she couldn’t work and had to move home to live with her parents, who she says have been amazing.

Her condition meant that any abdominal changes, like having periods, resulted in more pain. A Mirena intra-uterine device and the pill stopped her menstruating, but then she started to go into menopause. She tried Botox injections into her pelvis for the pain, but they only worked for a short time.

She returned to a colorectal surgeon and was referred to Fariba, who suggested they try the MonaLisa Touch laser therapy.

“It was all quite experimental [with Kristy’s condition] and I was so afraid that it wouldn’t work,” Kristy said. “But it did. It’s amazing! I can work again. I can have sex with my boyfriend.”

Before Kristy became ill she was a theatre nurse, but the pain caused by the endometriosis meant she couldn’t stand for long periods. Her condition took away some big parts of her life.

But during that time she met a special guy who has been there for her and the couple now have a normal, healthy relationship, and Kristy’s back at work in a skin cancer clinic. Kristy said she started to notice improvements around ten days after her first laser treatment.

“I found I had more energy when you’re in pain you get so tired and I used to sleep a lot of the time. I could stand for longer periods and I started going to the gym again. It really was life changing.”

So far, Kristy has had four laser treatments, and will be returning every three months to see how things go. And she shares her story openly because she knows she’s not the only woman to have had severe complications with endometriosis.

“My mum had it too, and while it is more widely recognised now, there is still a lot to learn.”

words davina montgomery

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We also offer treatments for: facial pigmentation, fine lines & wrinkles, acne, rosacea, scarring and specialised skin conditions.

37 Ruby Autumn

ruby insight

The gender diversity divide: Do men see the problem?

While we here at Ruby try to be wary of sweeping gender statements* we are big supporters of gender equity, which is why a new survey by Hays Recruitment on the gender diversity divide caught our attention.

R

eleased in time for International Women’s Day on March 8, the global survey of almost 6,000 people, found that while just under half of the women surveyed thought that equally capable male and female workers were not paid or rewarded equally, less than 20 per cent of men surveyed agreed. Other key findings of the survey include 21 per cent of men compared to 48 per cent of women did not believe that the same career opportunities are available to all, regardless of gender, while just 9 per cent of respondents believed gender quotas can have a big impact; saying instead that flexible working and cultural change are key. Only one in five male respondents believed the same career opportunities are not open to equally capable colleagues of both genders, while one in two female respondents agreed with the statement.

The theme of International Women’s Day 2015 was ‘Make It Happen’, sending out the call for greater gender equality. But how do we get there?

More flexible workplace practices topped the list measures that would make a sustained

38 Ruby Autumn

difference in bridging the gender diversity divide, according to the survey’s respondents, alongside changes to workplace practices through education across the business, and followed by highlighting female role models, changes to organisational policy, changes to government policy and better board backing for diversity issues. Just 9 per cent said implementing quotas would have a big impact, showing the debate has moved on from the idea of formal quotas to cultural and practical changes within workplaces.

“Our survey shows there is a major disparity between the views of men and women when it comes to equal pay and equal opportunities,” says Alistair Cox, CEO of Hays.

“We found that more women than men think the sexes aren’t paid or rewarded equally, while more than double the number of women to men say the same career options are not open to both genders.

“This suggests that most people in executive and senior management roles – the majority of which are men – still fail to see any inequality when it comes to pay and career opportunities between the sexes. This makes

it difficult to see how we will see any significant advancement in this area while the majority of people in senior roles do not recognise it as an issue.

“Given all the research espousing the benefits of a gender-diverse workforce, it is a paradox therefore that we still see such a gap in representation and a disproportionately low number of women in leadership positions, supported and encouraged to reach their career goals, and paid equally. Many organisations now have specific programmes in place to address this issue, yet it has to be asked how successful these might be given that the majority of our survey respondents felt as though no imbalance existed in terms of pay or opportunities. Maybe this lack of recognition of the issue is the real obstacle to change.”

For more information on the survey, visit www. social.hays.com/diversity (* “Boys are stupid, throw rocks at them,” wouldn’t qualify as a sweeping gender statement, would it?)

ruby health

B

eing overweight or obese is not just a factor for an individual at an aesthetic level; it has serious health consequences, such as an increase in the risk of cancer, diabetes and heart disease. The real tragedy is that these complications are preventable.

“It is clear that weight loss is a topic that is on many people’s minds and there are many potential solutions that people can use to lose weight. However, achieving one’s weight loss goals can be extremely difficult. For success, a weight loss program needs to be approached from a number of different angles,” said Sam Webb, owner of The Firm Slimming & Health Clinic – Geelong.

It’s not just about looking good …

Statistics from the Australian Institute of Health and Welfare show that Australia is facing a major health crisis in the not too distant future, not from some exotic virus, but from the complications of a society were three out of five people are classified as being overweight or obese.

“We utilise electro-therapy treatment along with infrared treatment, customized eating plans and ongoing monitoring of our clients’ progress to ensure our clients remain motivated on their weight loss journey. We are committed to helping women and men lose weight in an effective, fast and healthy way,” she said.

The team at The Firm Slimming & Health Clinic are experienced with techniques that have helped people lose weight, tone muscles and reduce the appearance of cellulite for over twenty years. Electrotherapy plays a crucial part in the weight loss program; it helps firm and tone muscles to reshape the body. It is a non-invasive treatment that is excellent for centimetre loss and muscle toning. It is a safe and painless alternative to surgery or drugs, achieving rapid results with no recovery time needed.

book your free trial now

Treatment takes place in private, individual cubicles. During treatment, pads are strategically placed on a person’s body and the machine’s advanced computerised program sends pulses to the muscles to contract and relax, simulating natural muscle movements during exercise. This allows targeting of specific body areas clients may want to see toned and firmed. Clients describe it as a workout without sweat. The most popular full body workout treatment takes only 30 minutes three times a week, for a minimum of a four-week course of treatments.

There is no magic pill, potion or lotion that will result in weight-loss, instead it involves commitment and a lifestyle change, but the rewards are an improved quality of life, with a slimmer, more toned body. If you have more than five kilograms to lose consider getting help from a weight-loss specialist.

If you need to lose weight, struggle to commit to going to gym or dislike the gym environment, or have areas on your body that you feel need toning and firming, then consider joining a weight loss program like the one offered at The Firm Slimming & Health Clinic.

Your chances of success improve if you find a program that is simple to follow, motivates you on your weight-loss journey, and fits in with your lifestyle needs.

Samantha Webb T: 03 5221 9310 M: 0419 775 584

Email: sam@thefirmslimming.com.au Address: Shop C, 87 Little Malop Street, Geelong, VIC, 3220

www.thefirmslimming.com.au

words samantha webb, the firm slimming & health clinic 39 Ruby Autumn

ruby spotlight

A Woman v

POLITICAL

Women in politics: the fact that it’s even an issue says everything you need to know about how far we’ve come, and how far we’ve got to go. Whatever political persuasion you lean towards, even if you fall into the pool of the completely apathetic, and whatever your views on politics and politicians, it is undeniable that representative politics is a demanding job. When you’re a single mum, as two of our local state and federal representatives are, the time, focus and emotional demands of the job ratchet up a few notches.

While we tend to talk a lot and read a lot about politics in the office (moan, swear, complain and wonder why they don’t do it the way we’d do it, ‘coz then it’d be done right) we also talk a lot about what it must be like for women in politics today. Julia Gillard, Peta Credlin, need we say more?

Lisa Neville was first elected to the seat of Bellarine in 2002, taking

the marginal seat from retiring Liberal member, Garry Spry, and has held the seat through four elections. Last December, having picked up a 7.3 per cent swing to take the seat 5545 per cent after preferences, she was named the Victorian Minister for Environment, Climate Change and Water in the Andrews Government.

She was previously the Shadow Minister for Environment and Climate Change and Shadow Minister for the Arts, and in the last Labor Government was the Minister for Mental Health, the Minister for Aged Care, and Minister for Children, Minister for Senior Victorians and Minister for Community Services. She has one son, Sam, with former husband and now Federal Member for Corio, Richard Marles; with the couple having separated when Sam was young. I talked to Lisa about how she has managed the juggle.

“I got into politics when my son was just going into Prep, so basically I’ve been in politics right through his whole schooling. There was the balancing of childcare, and then I was a Minister the last time we were in government, while he was still in primary school and into high school. Last year he did his VCE, so all the stress of balancing work and family, and then VCE and elections, words author’s name

40 Ruby Autumn

I’ve lived through all of those.

“You don’t think about it, you just cope with it. I’m a list writer, so I write a lot of lists and have them everywhere. My son is very disorganized, and that adds a slight level of stress, so I try writing lists for him, but that doesn’t seem to work as well. I think it’s one of those things that thousands and thousands of women live with every day. There are good days with it and there are bad days with it,” she says.

And yes, many of us know and battle with the bad juggle days, and while it’s the big stuff that you think would be the problem, anyone who has tried to do the shopping after work and after school with an angry, hormonal child knows that it’s the little things that either drive you crazy trying to do or just don’t get done.

“Proper exercise has probably only just happened this year, now that my son has turned 18. I now get up very early and walk down where I live, because if you don’t start the day with it, by the time you get home it’s just too late. I absolutely hate shopping and I must admit that I do have a cleaner – that’s my little treat to myself. But the washing and the shopping … you just try to maximise every minute of the day to get it all done.”

When she’s not sitting in Parliament in Spring Street, attending any number of ministerial meetings and committee

ruby spotlight

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meetings or simply talking to constituents in her local Bellarine office in Newcomb, Lisa said she does make time to enjoy some of the best of the area she represents.

“I’ve discovered Jack Rabbit and that’s become a bit of a favourite; it’s an amazing place with just the most amazing view. I spend a bit of time at The Dunes in Ocean Grove as well.

“We’re extraordinarily lucky with the range of choices we have around the Bellarine. The Grand Hotel at Portarlington has become a bit of a local that I’ve enjoyed recently and I’ve never had a bad meal at the Queenscliff Hotel either. We just have great food, great wine and we’re spoilt for choice.”

Lisa joined the Labor party in 1987, while she was living in Queensland. It was the last days of the Joh BjelkePetersen era and Lisa’s political passion was forged amongst a fever of anti-Joh sentiment.

“It was a very, very conservative, very dictatorial leadership in Queensland at the time,” she recalls. A brief stint in student politics saw Lisa become the president of the National Union of Students, and she continued as an active member of Labor’s right wing Labor Unity faction. She began working in the public sector, moving to Geelong, and working in local Neighbourhood Houses, for the Victorian Council of Social Services – of which she became the Vice-President - and joined the Board of Barwon Health. Most of this background information came up as part of my research for this article, and it occurred to me that across all the years I’ve interviewed Lisa, I had never heard her refer to the many positions

iss u e s

is

so

making

sure

affect

our

our th e and

i m p o rt a n t , th a t

“I just felt like I wanted to take it to the next step. I was interested in all those community issues and I wanted to be able to do something at another level about those issues,” and representative politics was that level.

It wasn’t an easy path for women into politics at the time, and hasn’t become much easier in the intervening years.

“Often you find that it’s women who end up running in marginal seats, which Bellarine was at that. Women rarely get the safe seats, but you will often see them getting the marginal seats, which is why the numbers of women in politics tends to go up and down.

“It was a competitive preselection I went through,” and the wry laugh gave away more about just how competitive it was than the words themselves.

“But I won the local vote and went on to win the seat. I’ve been through four elections now and I’ve certainly never taken it for granted. It’s a marginal seat, so you work very hard in your local community.”

As a girl, Lisa said politics wasn’t on her agenda, and remembers wanting to be a marine biologist at one point.

“But from the time I was about 13, community issues were things that I talked about, debated, argued with my parents about. And I while was very engaged around a lot of issues I would never, ever, have thought about or articulated wanting to be a member of parliament… I couldn’t imagine how I

th a t

chance

making

she’s held. She always talks about the organisations, ‘my time in the student union’, or ‘working in community services’, and keeps the focus on the issues. But her ambition and drive was clear to anyone paying attention.

we

are

c o m m u n it y .

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would get there.”

When I asked Lisa if she believes we need more women in politics her answer was an instant and emphatic, “absolutely”.

“I’ve been lucky. When I was elected in 2002 we had a mass number of women of different ages elected, and I think it does make a difference about what your policy priorities are and how you respond to issues.

Having that voice at the table is so important, not just for representing women, but making sure that we are fully representing the issues that affect our community. I think the more diversity we have in our parliament that represents more broadly the community, the better chance we have of focusing on the right issues and making better decisions.

“There is no simple guide to how you become a member of parliament, but past and present women MPs being able to provide that support and become mentors is really important. I had the support of Emily’s List, which has played a really important role here in Australia in supporting women into parliament through early support and early money. Often, having money to run a campaign is really critical and that’s where the idea of Emily’s List came from, to provide that early intervention, early support and money to assist women.

“I think we need to be telling the stories about the difference you can make and how you can contribute, to give people a sense that there is good that can come out of putting your hand up and running for public office – and we need good people to do that to get good outcomes.”

words davina montgomery 41 Ruby Autumn

ruby spotlight wellbeing, post breast cancer surgery. Julie has established an organisation called Perfect Again. Rejecting the imported prosthesis available to her when she had a mastectomy because of its heaviness and shape, she designed an Australian alternative. Through determination and research she has developed a unique process of mapping and construction.

Using modern technology Julie is able to make a mirror image of the existing breast and the post-surgery chest landscape, so that the breast form is unique. These breast forms are light and stick to the chest wall, allowing breast cancer survivors comfort and flexibility to get on with their lives. Julie spends hours with each client and gives them full support and sensitivity during the process. Julie works with intelligence and a great sense of humour, her fantastic energy is inspiring to her community.

Our Inspiring Local Women

Jo Brown

It was a night of screaming laughter, of bringing together some extraordinary local women (and a few seriously top blokes) and celebrating some of our community’s quiet achievers when the City of Greater Geelong’s Advisory Group to Council, the Women in Community Life Advisory Committee, hosted an International Women’s Day celebration at the Yacht Club.

As well as bringing the fierce, fabulous and self-confessed non-fuck-giver, Catherine Deveny back to Geelong to talk about the need for gender equality in a way only she can, the night also celebrated the inaugural Women in Community Life Award.

Sponsored and judged by Women’s Health and Wellbeing Barwon South West, the Award invited nominations of women from across our region that have committed their time, their energy and their passion to improving their community and providing support and opportunities for other women. While there could be only one Award winner, with Monica Hayes chosen as the inaugural award winner, the shortlisted nominees were all extraordinary, all inspiring, and their stories deserve to be told.

Monica Hayes Monica moved to the Bellarine Peninsula with a background in local politics and psychology. Monica was confident she could balance her parental responsibilities and also make a contribution to her community. She has since had many voluntary roles in the primary school, Bellarine Community Health, the Portarlington Community Association, quickly being promoted to leadership positions. Monica is a founding member of WILD, which advocates for gender equity in local government. She is the current

and founding president of the positive ageing group, Staying Put in Portarlington, and convener of Portarlington’s Locomote seatscape article. Monica is passionate about promoting wider recognition of women and is truly valued within her community.

Rosemary Nugent Rosemary is passionate about justice and life-long learning for her community and is rewarded by seeing others develop their skills and confidence. She initiated the idea for a neighbourhood house in Geelong West and, after a determined five years of lobbying, was successful in the formation of a steering committee. Although the Geelong West Neighbourhood House has over 1000 members it still has no funding for staff and no premises. Rosemary voluntarily works from home up to 60 hours every week to ensure an exciting and interesting array of programs are delivered from various locations, as well as continually working to attract funding for the centre.

Her perseverance over ten years shows resilience and determination and inspires many women. Others have described her as ‘modest’, ‘amazing’, ‘omnipresent’ and ‘incredible’, she is highly respected in her community.

Julie Brand Julie is changing the lives of women.

She is giving them hope and a sense of

Jo is an inaugural member of the Geelong West Neighbourhood House, as well as working on establishing this organisation, she has taken on roles such as Vice President and Community Development and Program Coordinator. With no premises and no paid staff, this neighbourhood house has been so successful because of volunteers like Jo, ensuring it has heart and soul and energy. She is passionate about connecting and strengthening her community, particularly in promoting courses that are appealing and accessible to women. Jo also voluntarily coordinates West FEST, a free community arts festival, which she does with enthusiasm and efficiency. Jo’s vibrancy, kindness and engaging nature inspires and motivates others. She is inclusive at all times and has a strong sense of social justice. Jo is extremely valued as a compassionate and caring community volunteer.

Liz Murphy Liz’s early career roles at Bethany and Barwon CASA had a focus on supporting women who were dealing with or escaping domestic violence. She not only helped them work through their pain but encouraged them to gain strength through collective action by participating in events such as Reclaim the Night. Liz has mentored many former clients and students to become strong independent women, seeking their own place in community development and support of women. Liz now works for Vic Health and has been successful in facilitating the incorporation of preventing violence against women into the planning process for several municipalities.

Liz is highly valued in her community for not only her passion for safe communities for women, but empowering women to be

www.facebook.com/womenincommunitylife or www.womenshealthbsw.org.au 42 Ruby Autumn

ruby spotlight

this, that & more

equal and fruitful contributors to its development.

Step up to Smooth

Anna Negro Anna is the Principal of Sacred Heart College and has devoted her entire working life to providing quality education for girls in Geelong. For more than 25 years, Anna has worked tirelessly to ensure that girls, regardless of socio-economic circumstance or academic history, have the opportunity to achieve and be heard.

She has instigated and championed an exemplar social justice program, which encourages every student to be involved in projects that change lives. The Alumni now follow her example and are actively involved in social justice projects, particularly for women, long after they have left the school. She is a role model, for both students and staff, of the benefits of hard work, goal setting, dedication and compassion. Anna’s mantra is: Educate girls and the world will be a better place. Anna’s work is greatly valued by her community.

THE ELEVARE SHOWER FOOT REST IS THE EASY, NON-SLIP WAY TO SHAVE, EXFOLIATE OR MOISTURISE YOUR LEGS IN THE SHOWER

WINNER OF TWO AUSTRALIAN DESIGN AWARDS

Glenys Cashmore Glenys has managed a demanding career as a district nurse and coordinator with a vast array of volunteering commitments.

She has volunteered as a tester for Rotary’s annual screening for bowel cancer. For fifteen years she has assisted clients at the McKellar Centre to attend Communion, as well as helping with the breakfast program at Christ Church and coordinating the Spring Fair. Glenys Belongs to both Belmont Ladies and Waurn Ponds Probus clubs, where she has served time as President.

Her leadership roles have also included being president of the Matthew Flinders Alumni, The East Belmont Health Centre and the Geelong Hospital Nurses League. Glenys inspires women in her community to reach their goals, through her outstanding leadership and compassionate listening skills. Glenys is much respected in the Geelong community.

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Veema Mooniapah Veema is a passionate advocate for women in the Geelong community, particularly those from diverse backgrounds. She has been involved in establishing the women’s only swimming program, which operates in Corio, allowing women and children who would otherwise not participate to have the opportunity to socialise and develop water skills in a safe environment. Veema is generous with her time and often commits her weekends to her work. She inspires and motivates many women to get involved with their wider community. The city of Greater Geelong is one of the first councils to have a Multicultural Action Plan and Veema was the driving force behind this and the Multicultural Action Plan Committee. Veema is greatly appreciated in the Geelong community.

Denise Alaalatoa Denise is looked upon in her community as a mentor and leader for women of all ages. She has been the driving force behind the Portarlington Netball Club for many years, encouraging hundreds of young women to get involved and become active both on the courts and in leadership roles. She has successfully secured grants for the club, as well as opportunities for the young players to experience national level games in Melbourne. She has been a key instigator in bringing programs into local clubs that assist the young people to become responsible human beings both on and off the field. She is also a leading figure within the tennis club, reigniting junior tennis by creating a partnership with the local school. Denise annually brings together a team of local women to prepare and sell mussels for the local Mussel festival, which contributes thousands of dollars to local community groups.

Denise gives countless hours to her community, for which she is greatly appreciated.

eclectica fashion • home • indulgence Open 10am-5pm weekdays • 10am-4pm Sat 148 Pakington Street, Geelong West Phone: 5222 1115

eclectica.com.au to advertise your services or products in “this, that & more” vplease email abbey at abbey@adcellgroup.com.au 43 Ruby Autumn

ruby spotlight

Clever design for a hairy problem What does it take to get your great idea from the vision in your head to a real product on a store shelf? Judy Baulch talks to a Geelong woman who has made her idea a reality.

T

he seeds of a great idea can be sown during the most mundane moments. Shaving her legs in the shower one day while grumpy about the inconvenience of living in a Queensland rental without a bath to prop her leg on, the then 23 year-old Leanne Brown had a light bulb moment: there had to be an easier way to conduct this most common of activities and she had just thought of it.

Despite the scoffing of her flatmate, she wrote the idea on a paper napkin and although the piece of paper got lost, the dream remained. More than a decade later, Leanne’s product, Elevare, the shower foot rest, last year won a gold medal at the Sydney Design Awards, a silver medal at the Melbourne Design Awards and was a finalist in the Victorian Premier’s Awards. It’s selling like hotcakes at the Shaver Shop and all over the world online, with happy customers as far away as Alaska.

“I didn’t know when I thought of it that it would turn out to be Elevare. I didn’t know what it was going to look like, I didn’t know anything except it was going to be something,” the now 39 year-old business owner says, as she watches her two small children play in the backyard of her Geelong home. She’s just home from her full-time job in the insurance company she coowns and up for another early start and big day tomorrow, but her passion for the product she has created is obvious.

It’s not surprising really. Millions of women around the world shave their legs and the associated inconveniences are fodder for a hundred hair removal product advertisements. We’ve all propped a foot on a one litre shampoo bottle and hurt our toes in the process, or put one leg up against the shower wall like a contortionist, gotten a rash from shaving over the goosebumps that appear when your put your leg out of the warm water onto

44 Ruby Autumn

ruby spotlight

the cold edge of the bath, or balanced precariously on one foot while rinsing the other off in the basin. Who hasn’t thought there has to be a better way?

Leanne is the only one who has actually turned the thought into reality. There was nothing on the market all those years ago when she first had her idea and the finished product is unique - a kind of heart shape on the end of a stick, ergonomically designed to stay upright while you rest your foot on it. It’s unobtrusive, light weight and portable.

It’s not a seat, it’s not a stool or a shelf, or something that doubles as shampoo storage. It is, as Leanne says, “about you and your leg.” You can use it for shaving, exfoliating, moisturising, fake tanning. It’s brilliant really, up there with all the other household inventions that have made life’s daily tasks a little easier, but it has been a long, and not always smooth, journey from concept to reality.

An initial patent search after Leanne moved back to Geelong cost the 26 yearold all her savings, but it was worth it to know her idea was unique.

“But then I didn’t know what to do next,” she says. “I had no idea. So, one afternoon, I rang all these places, like rubber manufacturers and designers.

I really didn’t know who I was calling, I didn’t even know what an industrial designer was back then, I was just Googling things and then ringing people and they all fobbed me off. Then I called this number and this guy answered and he said to me, ‘Just tell me what you want to do, and I’ll tell you if I can help you.’”

The guy was Paul Charlwood of Melbourne’s renowned Charlwood Design and that conversation triggered an ongoing working relationship that

eventually led to the award winning design. Leanne went to see Paul, bearing her prototype, a “monstrosity of a thing” she had put together that she says now didn’t look anything like the vision in her mind. Six or seven stages of drawings later, Leanne was out of money and the process stopped for three years while she regrouped.

This time, the concept drawings matched the vision in her head. “I turned up for the viewing of the drawings and I said ‘that’s it!’ and everyone cheered,” she remembers. “I had a few tears. For me to see that, that someone had taken my vision and made it look like it looked in my head was a special moment. Then when I got the prototype it was even more surreal.”

In a way, that was only the beginning of a another steep learning curve, in which Leanne learnt about the importance of packaging that suits retailers’ shelf spaces, about how to set up a website that works and how to approach retailers. Sorting out patents, she says, has been “amazingly crazy.”

There was also the question of where and how to manufacture the product.

Leanne’s preference was to have it produced locally, but the cost was prohibitive. Elevare is proudly designed in Australia and manufactured in China, although Leanne still harbours a dream of bringing production back to Geelong.

“This is the vision if it gets really big we can have a factory in Geelong and then we can employ production staff and admin staff and an art department, because people will want different colours and designs, and then you can have another department that mentors people with their own big ideas, to guide them where they need to go and who

they need to see.

“I think people assume that, if you have an idea, of course it will be a success, but it’s not necessarily so. A thought becomes an idea, an idea becomes a vision and the vision becomes a reality, but that’s just one component and then you have this whole other world and financially it can be very hard and scary when your dream becomes reality. Then it’s not what you know but who you know, and everyone I’ve dealt with has been amazing.”

That includes her husband, Nick. “I would never have done it had Nick not encouraged me to do it. When I was worried about the financial side he said, ‘Lea, worst case scenario if it doesn’t work is we’ll just live in a caravan!’”

It hasn’t come to that, but they have put off renovating their home and juggling full-time work, two children and Elevare is not always easy. But Leanne, who has always been a hard worker, has held on to her faith in her idea.

“Nick and I decided to do it because we wanted something different. Yes, we could have done our renovation and lived our nine-to-five jobs but if Elevare does work we see it as an investment that can change our ordinary life.

“The thing about having a design or a product,” she adds seriously, “is that you have to believe in it, because if you don’t, then no one is holding a piece of a paper that says go spend your money and make it and we’ll sell it. It is a punt.

You literally do it because you love it and whatever happens after that happens.

It’s not even about the money, it’s just one day I had an idea and I’ve done it in between two kids and with a husband who said ‘Just do it’. Everyone needs a dream…”

words judy baulch 45 Ruby Autumn

Dear Ruby Ladies, We love putting Ruby together. It makes us feel like we have a special little non-argumentative girl child that holds all our hopes, our beliefs, and yes, a few of our foibles as well. She is the very best version of ourselves and when you tell us that you love her too, well, we melt a little.

We also know she’s a popular little minx, never where she should be and running off with, let’s face it, anyone who’ll have her. So, we sat her down, gave her a good talking to about why she needs to be certain places, so that the fabulous women who like her can find her.

From now on, our Ruby bloke, Ronnie, will be out around town dropping off more copies of Ruby and filling up Ruby baskets (for distribution points, see the list below). We won’t be posting out as many copies but if you’re business is missing out, just get in touch with the gorgeous Abbey: abbey@adcellgroup.com.au Someone snaffling your office copy, or keep finding empty Ruby baskets (told you she’s a minx!)? Don't worry, we've got a new low subscription fee of $14.50 per year. I know, she’s cheap too – but in a good way!

Here are 30 + places you can pick up a copy of Ruby Magazine in and around Geelong.

More locations are coming soon so keep an eye on our Facebook page for updates.

East Geelong: Buxton Real Estate Pink Elm Routleys Café Bellarine Shopping Centre Kings Funerals Newcomb Central Medical Centre Highton: Darriwill Farm Café South Geelong: Byars Packaging Bellarine Peninsula: Oakdene Restaurant, Vineyard & Cafe Terindah Estate Leura Park Jack Rabbit Flying Brick Cider Co

CBD: Geelong Performing Arts Centre Market Square Shopping Centre Speakys Surf Skate and Snow Venus Flytrap Australian Skin Face & Body The Firm Slimming Clinic Myer St Medical Clinic Geelong City Medical Clinic Royal Geelong Yacht Club Baveras Belmont/Grovedale/Waurn Ponds: Blu Living The Cottage Medical Clinic

Soft Coffee Lounge (Spotlight centre) Waurn Ponds Shopping Centre Kardinia Health Geelong West/Newtown: Artworks Jewellers West End Real Estate ts14+ Eclectica Jovic Accounting Brax Windows and Blinds If you would like to stock Ruby Magazines in your business, please contact abbey@ adcellgroup.com.au

Ruby

FOOD

Cooking in season means that you can enjoy the freshest and the best of what our local producers have to offer without having to pay top price for b grade cold-stored foods from the supermarket.

Dwayne Bourke

Darius Sarkis

Executive Chef, Flying Brick Cider House

Head Chef, Baveras Brasserie Originally trained in French cuisine, Darius enjoys the lighter side of Asian cuisine and tries to combine a blend of both in his cooking.

Dwayne is a highly acclaimed culinary personality whose impressive career has included ‘hatted’ restaurants such as Sunnybrae, Pettavel, The Mansion at Werribee, The Argo and the ever popular Denny’s Kitchen in Geelong.

After commencing his career at Mietta’s in Queenscliff, Darius has also worked at Harry’s, Finnigans Place, and Riviera on Yarra before starting with Baveras Brasserie in early 2012.

Under Dwayne’s direction, the Flying Brick Cider House is renowned for serving up a contemporary menu designed to inspire, share and indulge.

With 19 years’ experience now under his belt, passion continues to drive Darius to evolve in the craft of cooking as he inspires his team and customers at Baveras Brasserie.

Local produce and community group partnerships are both key features of the Flying Brick Menu.

Autumn Go NUTS in Autumn with…. o

Walnuts,

o

Almonds,

o

Pistachio,

o

Pecans,

o

Macadamias

o

Chestnuts.

Nuts are available all year round, but Autumn is when the new season's crops are harvested.

Ruby top picks o

Beetroot

o

Apples

You can buy now in the shell and store them in a cool dark place for up to 9 months.

o

Broccoli

o

Bananas

o

Cauliflower

o

Figs

o

Spinach

o

Melons

o

Sweet Potato

o

Pears

o

Zucchini

o

Strawberries

o

Silverbeet

o

Mushrooms

o

Rhubarb

If you’re a fan of toasty warm nuts, you really can’t beat the amazing aromas produced when oven-roasting or lightly pan toasting your favourite mix for nice afternoon or evening snack.

Veg:

Fruit:

47 Ruby Autumn

ruby food

Twice Cooked Pumpkin Souffle, Drysdale goat curd, tomatoes & basil

Serves 8

50 gm Drysdale Goat curd

Ingredients

Pink salt to taste

For the souffle

For the garnish

500gm roast pumpkin

4 large roma tomatoes

500ml Milk

16 cherry tomatoes

75gm Butter

½ bunch basil

75gm Flour

80gm Drysdale goat curd

3 Egg Yolks

40gm toasted pumpkin seeds

6 Egg Whites

Pink salt to season.

100gm Parmesan

Vegetable oil

Method For the souffle 1. Pre heat oven to 170°C. 2. Heat milk gently.

3. In a pan melt butter, add flour and make a blond roux.

4. Cook out for 5 minutes, gradually adding the warm milk.

5. Check seasoning, cover with greaseproof paper and allow to cool naturally.

6. Once base has cooled slightly add egg yolks, pumpkin & parmesan.

7. In mixer whisk egg whites with a pinch of salt to medium peak, then fold into base carefully.

8. Add goat curd. Season.

9. Ladle into sprayed moulds. Bake in a bain marie for 20 minutes until well risen.

10. Allow to cool.

11. Once cool enough to handle, turn out onto tray lined with baking paper.

To Assemble 1. Slice Roma tomatoes into 8-10 slices each. Season.

2. Pick basil leaves & fry in small amount of oil.

3. Halve cherry tomatoes & add to sliced Romas.

4. Lay sliced Romas on plate, surround with cherry tomatoes.

5. Top tomatoes with snall pieces of goat cheese.

6. Scatter pumpkin seeds over the top.

7. Lay fried basil on top.

8. Gently heat soufflé in oven approx. 3-4 Mins.

9. Place soufflé on top of tomatoes & serve.

words dwayne bourke, flying brick cider house

48 Ruby Autumn

Cayenne spiced sweet fried chicken

Cayenne spiced sweet fried chicken with a peanut and sesame red cabbage salad PEANUT AND SESAME RED CABBAGE SALAD Ingredients 1 red chilli with some seeds, chopped 1/3 cup vegetable oil 1/4 cup fresh lime juice 2 tablespoons reduced salt soy sauce 2 teaspoons brown sugar 1 teaspoon fish sauce 1 teaspoon peeled ginger, cut into thin strips Salt to taste 1/2 small head of red cabbage, thinly sliced 2 small carrots, peeled, shredded 6 spring onions, whites and pale greens only, thinly sliced 1 cup baby spinach, thinly sliced 1/3 bunch chopped fresh coriander, washed and roughly chopped 100g chopped dry-roasted peanuts 1/2 teaspoons toasted sesame seeds METHOD Whisk the vegetable oil, lime juice, soy sauce, brown sugar and fish sauce in a bowl and then add your chilli and ginger. Put bowl to the side for half an hour to allow the flavours to infuse a little.

In another bowl mix the cabbage, carrots, scallions, spinach and coriander, give the dressing a god mix and the pour over the salad and mix well. Top with peanuts and sesame seeds.

Ingredients 2 medium sized chickens, each cut into 10 pieces (breasts halved) 1 tablespoon freshly ground black pepper 2 tablespoons plus 4 tsp salt 4 large eggs 2 cups buttermilk or whole milk 2 tablespoons tabasco 4 cups plain flour Vegetable oil (for frying) and 1 cup for dressing 6 tablespoons cayenne pepper 2 tablespoons dark brown sugar 1 teaspoon chili powder 1 teaspoon garlic powder 1 teaspoon paprika 2 Limes METHOD Toss chicken with black pepper and 2 tablespoon salt in a large bowl. Cover and chill at least 3 hours.

Whisk the eggs, buttermilk (or milk if you can’t get buttermilk) and tabasco sauce in a large bowl. In another bowl whisk flour and remaining 4 teaspoons salt and set aside.

In a large pot (or if you have a deep fryer you can use that) heat oil over medium-high heat until thermometer registers 180°. Pat the chicken dry and working with 1 piece at a time, coat in the flour mixture. Shake off any excess flour and then dip in buttermilk mixture, letting the excess drip back into bowl. Coat the chicken again in flour mixture and place on a baking sheet.

Working in 4 batches and returning oil to 180° between batches, fry the chicken, turning occasionally, until skin is deep golden brown and crisp and cooked through, 15-18 minutes. Transfer the cooked chicken onto a clean wire rack to allow any excess oil to drip off.

Whisk cayenne pepper, brown sugar, chili powder, garlic powder and paprika in a medium bowl and then add 1 cup of oil and mix thoroughly. Brush the fried chicken with the spicy oil and serve with a couple of limes cut in half.

words darius sarkis, baveras

New Menu!

Cunningham Pier, Geelong (03) 5222 6377 | baveras.com.au reservations@baveras.com.au

@BaverasBrasserie Baveras Check the website for trading hours

#Bav er a s 49 Ruby Autumn

ruby travel

CITY OF DREAMS

A

short block away from Hollywood Boulevard is Trip Advisor’s highest rating (93%) accommodation, the Magic Castle Hotel. Darren Ross and his energetic team simply provide the best small touches and service you will ever experience in this remarkable boutique establishment that is the favourite of Australians visiting Hollywood.

won many awards for his vision of how you should be treated as a hotel guest.

He tours the world as a consultant, including coming to Australia - a land he loves - and it’s those special touches like Vegemite at the breakfast bar that sets him and his hotel apart. And, when you’re on the other side of the world, it does bring a smile to your face.

imagine. Avail yourself of the all-day bus tour because it is enlightening and covers a lot territory, including Venice Beach, Santa Monica, Los Angeles City, the Hollywood sign, Beverly Hills, Rodeo Drive, who lives where, and great tour guides that know what’s going on and it’s around $85 for the whole day – money well spent.

As you arrive a happy staff member with a glass of bubbly to put you in the right mood after the journey meets you and, before you know it, you’re on first name basis with the staff that whisk you off to your spacious rooms. It used to be an apartment complex, so the majority have a separate bedroom, living room, dining and kitchen area – lots of space.

Right next door is the most exclusive club in Los Angeles, The Magic Castle, and unless you’re a member or know one, you can’t get in, unless, of course, you’re staying at the Magic Castle Hotel.

This remarkable club is the home of America’s finest magicians and after a sumptuous meal you can be entertained all night long.

All the great studios are close by and for this article we’re going to the oldest and one of the largest of Hollywood’s great dream factories – Paramount, who are celebrating their 101st anniversary this year. This is the home of Titanic, Forrest Gump, Indiana Jones, Crocodile Dundee, The Godfather, Star Trek, Mission Impossible, Grease, Top Gun, Saturday Night Fever, The Hunt for Red October, Flashdance and Interstellar to name just a few. If you have a curiosity about how movies and TV series are made, the 5-hour V.I.P. Tour is highly recommended, with expert guides that will take you deep into the back lot for a close up and personal look at the picture making business and the studios where these immortal films were made.

What the Magic Castle Hotel is particularly good at is delighting you at every turn with a service you weren’t expecting, like free snacks and drinks 24/7, free laundry service, free internet, free all-you-can-eat continental breakfast, free DVD library and free morning newspaper, to mention but a few. CEO, Darren Ross, is proud to be known as the ‘Service Freak’ and has 50 Ruby Autumn

This is simply a treat not to be missed while you’re staying next door. The Magic Castle Hotel comes with my highest recommendation Now that you’re here in Hollywood…

Just down the street is the famous Hollywood Boulevard with the Chinese Theatre, the stars in the pavement and the craziest street scenes you can

Everything from props, jewellery and scenery from those famous movies are there to see, even Dr Phil was being taped as we went next door to check out a sound stage. The Bronson Gate from which Dennis Buchinsky became Charles Bronson (The Magnificent Seven) was in fact named after the adjoining Bronson Street. As V.I.P. guests, we were allowed into the vaults where all the master reels of film are kept and I got to see and touch such classics as The Godfather and Breakfast at Tiffany’s.

Paramount’s Chief Archivist, Andrea Kalas said, “It’s crucial that we preserve our films and there’s 3,500 movies in our heritage. The ‘A’ group, with titles like The Godfather and Sunset Boulevard that we worked on recently, are restored at the most appropriate resolution for that film that’s available, up to 8k (20-20 vision).” Next year it will be Saturday Night Fever. Paramount Studios is a delightful way to enter the world of show business and the V.I.P. Tour is highly recommended.

GRAND CANYON

been snowing during the week prior to my visit and that was an added surprise.

Of the natural wonders of the world, the Grand Canyon ranks first for many of those who have experienced it firsthand.

Nothing can prepare you for the vista, as the Canyon is 446 kms long, up to 29 kms wide and 1,800 metres deep.

The Grand Canyon National Park’s two prime destinations are the West Rim and the South Rim, and Papillon does both.

You will be picked up from your Las Vegas hotel and driven to the airport. All taxes, fuel surcharges and park entrance fees are included.

Getting there can take a lot of time by car or bus, so the idea of a 45 minute helicopter ride from Boulder airport (a 25 minute shuttle ride from Las Vegas), is attractive. But what will get your heart racing is the thought of being able to descend the 1,800 metres to the Canyon floor and land comfortably by the Colorado River. Papillon Helicopters do just that and have been in commercial operation since 1965 and safely transport more than 600,000 passengers a year.

Recent evidence suggests that the Colorado River established its course through the canyon at least 17 million years ago and, since that time, the Colorado River continued to erode and form the canyon as it is today. It had

During your flight you’ll see Lake Mead, the magnificent Hoover Dam, a fair stretch of the Grand Canyon and Skywalk, as well as landing by the Colorado River for a good look around, a picnic lunch and champagne.

Compared to car or bus that take all day and just take you to the rim, the Papillon helicopter ride over the Grand Canyon and then down to the floor and back in comfort, only takes four hours. A simply breathtaking way to tick this one off your bucket list The Papillon Grand Canyon ‘Grand Celebration’ Tour operates at dawn and susnet daiy and costs around $350.

words jon mamonski *Jon was a guest of Paramount Studios and the Magic Castle Hotel 51 Ruby Autumn

ruby wine

To Oak or Not To Oak The sun is shining, warm winds are gently blowing and it’s the time when we finally catch up with all those people we’ve been meaning to see all year. The entertaining season is upon us, and when it comes to serving up a white wine, we want it to be the right white.

I am no wine snob. I know what I like in a wine, and what I like in a wine is for it not to taste like something reminiscent of a feline waste product and for it to be in my hand. But I like to think I’m getting more discerning with age, and having moved on from those early leaps into the wine world (ah, the $4 Chardy), I now like to know a little more about what that wine in my hand is… apart from being a topped up glass, of course.

One of the questions that has had me quizzically peering at bottle labels for some years now, is what is the deal with oaked and unoaked wines? I turned to someone I knew would know the answer, the witty and wine-wise Steven Paul from Oakdene Wines.

Oakdene produce four wines considered aromatic in style. Across two five-acre vineyards, all fruit is harvested at the same time, which was happening the day after I spoke to Steve. A proportion of the fruit is allocated for fruit driven, aromatic wines and the balance for textured, savoury wines.

The Ly Ly Pinot Gris and Jessica Sauvignon are destined for oak barrels, while the Sauvignon Blanc and Pinot Grigio will be fermented in tanks.

What does the oak do? These whites are matured mostly on old oak barrels, so without those obvious strong oak

characters that you get in more robust styles like Chardonnay and reds. What you do get is a more textured wine, with softer acidity, rounder mouth feel (what I would call smooth, because I’m still learning my wine-speak) and a less fruitdriven style than Sauv Blancs and Pinot Grigios. These are more complex - some might say more interesting - wines, with a longer palate (i.e. the flavour stays in your mouth longer, as opposed to the instant hit of fruit and acidity you get in nonoaked whites).

Tank fermentation takes place in stainless steel, temperature controlled tanks.

Wines fermented in these tanks are not exposed to oxygen and the aim, so Steve explained, is to preserve the fruit to as close as possible to what you find in the vineyard. Ageing the wine on yeast provides fullness to the wine, and, three months after fermentation, it is bottled.

Full of fruit and with plenty of punch, these wines are on the market around four weeks are bottling.

Barrel fermentation sees the juice run into the French Oak Barriques (225-litre, or 58-gallon old-school barrels.) The warm environment, along with a small amount of oxidation during the ageing process, adds richness and texture to the wine and the contact with the spent yeast also works to soften the acidity.

OakdeneVineyards

52 Ruby Autumn

@Oakdenewines

From the original harvest, the oaked and unoaked wines are picked at the exactly the same time, have the same alcohol content from the fruit and the same aromatic profile. The barrel ferment and ageing process, however, is longer and needs far more time and attention from the winemakers. For styles like Sauvignon or Pinot Gris, they will spend around eight to ten months in the barrel. The result is a pale, textured, complex wine that is fast becoming the new ‘right white’.

Steve says that while the lighter, fruitier, unoaked Sauvignon Blanc and Pinot Grigio styles have held the buyers’ attention in recent years, the shift is already happening, with the fuller, more layered oaked whites fighting back in the popularity stakes.

With the ‘to oak or not to oak’ question answered, we can all quaff with, if not more style in our selves (although my late night rendition of “Jolene” has a distinctive style of its own), at least a better understanding of the style of wine we are pouring. Go ahead and show off a little! *Ruby and Oakdene support and recommend responsible consumption of alcohol. Blaming falling on the floor on a wobbly stool is not a good example of responsible consumption. And for the love of the sanity of every one of your contacts, don’t post/ tweet/text while p***ed, it’s never that funny in the morning!

ruby wine << 2013 OAKDENE ‘JESSICA’ SAUVIGNON

<< 2014 OAKDENE ‘LY LY’ PINOT GRIS

Full and complex with green fruits, vanilla and a mineral edge, leading to a creamy and rich mid palate, lively acidity and a long lingering after taste.

Pure, crisp and vibrant with tropical fruits, vanilla and a mineral edge, this lively white has a savoury, dry finish, and a long lingering after taste. Pale salmon with a green tinge in the glass, the ‘Ly Ly’ is the perfect choice for those looking for a little more complexity and depth in their whites.

This delightful white is a pale straw colour in the glass with a green tinge.

Featuring a lifted bouquet of passion fruit and citrus notes, with mineral overtones rounded out with barrel ferment characters, ths is one to savour.

Conclusion Enjoy now, or cellar for the next 3 to 6 years, to gain mid palate weight and complexity.

Featuring a lifted bouquet of spiced apple, guava and tropical fruits, with mineral overtones rounded out with barrel ferment characters.

Enjoy now, or cellar for the next 2 to 4 years, to gain mid palate weight and complexity.

<< 2014 OAKDENE PINOT GRIGIO

<< 2014 OAKDENE SAUVIGNON BLANC

Pale straw with a hint of bronze, this Pinot Grigio is light, dry, fruit-driven white that is reminiscent of blue skies and sunshine.

Pale straw with a green tinge, this crisp and crunchy white is lively and light.

With an intense nose of nashi pear, apple blossom and citrus, the palate offers generous fruit weight, and mid palate richness, supported by firm acidity and a mineral backbone, and a long dry finish.

Harvested early to retain natural acidity, producing a dry, fruit driven wine, best consumed over the next few years.

An intense nose of tropical fruits, grass and green capsicum leads to a fruit driven and lively palate of gooseberries, tropical melon, passion fruit and citrus characters. This is balanced by a firm acid backbone and a lingering finish.

Best consumed young while expressing the fresh fruit driven characters of the variety.

oakdene.com.au

VINEYARDS, RESTAURANT, CAFÉ AND CELLAR DOOR

cellar door – restaurant – café – accommodation Cellar Door Open: Daily 10am – 4pm Restaurant Open: Lunch Sat & Sun, Dinner Wed to Sat Mr Grubb Café: Open Lunch Daily, Dinner Fri & Sat, Breakfast Sat & Sun 255 Grubb Road, Wallington, Victoria 3222 | P 5256 3886 | E info@oakdene.com.au | www.oakdene.com.au

53 Ruby Autumn

Te r i n d a h E s t a t e - T h e B e l l a r i n e ' s M o s t B e a u t i f u l B o u t i q u e Ve n u e Award Winning Food & Wine The Shed & Cellar Door Cafe Panoramic Bay View Private Beach Access Weddings, Private Functions, Corporate Events Wine Tastings & Vineyard Tours Online Wine Store & Gift Vouchers

90 McAdams Lane, Bellarine 3223

hello@terindahestate.com

03 5251 5536

Driving down rustic old McAdams Lane, just off the Portarlington Road, you gain a sense that something spectacular is drawing near. Then suddenly, you catch a glimpse of the breathtaking panoramic views ahead, but to fully appreciate and capture the spectacular vistas across Corio Bay, the You Yangs and Melbourne’s city skyline, you must turn right into the driveway of the Bellarine’s ‘most beautiful’ boutique venue, Terindah Estate.

The term ‘terindah’, Indonesian for most beautiful - is fitting for this Geelong award-winning winery. Established by owners Peter and Cate Slattery in 2000, Terindah Estate’s 100-acre property is a must-see destination for anyone interested in visiting a vineyard with award-winning wines, delicious food and stunning architectural event spaces.

Clearly, the location and the picturesque setting pleases the eye, but there is much more at Terindah to tantalise the senses. As well as grapes, the property is home to over 100 fig, quince and citrus trees and rotating crops of wheat and barley. Their menu represents a love of food and ethical farming, with Terindah dishing up a noteworthy philosophy.

The kitchen team led by experienced Chefs Lyndon Betts & William Moyle, are motivated by sourcing nature-based seasonal produce from the region’s local farmers and neighbouring producers, as well as embracing fair-trade, organic and biodynamic practices to produce unique and distinctive flavours. All food is made-to-order and guests with food intolerances can be confident there will be vegan, dairy-free, vegetarian and gluten-free menu options available.

The Shed @ Terindah transformed from the property’s original 1950’s hayshed, is a modern-day cafe with floor-toceiling glass wall doors and captures a postcard view of the vineyard, framed by an ocean background while you dine.

A tantalising lunch menu is offered in The Shed, while the Cellar Door Café presents a lighter style menu to be enjoyed with a glass of wine. Guests can also opt for morning or afternoon tea with a selection of delectable house-baked

cakes and slices on display to enjoy with tea or coffee. In 2014, Gourmet Traveller Wine named Terindah’s Cellar Door as having the ‘Best Food in Geelong’.

The synergistic relationship between their menus and the estate-made wines is resulting in recent accolades; Winemaker Chris Sargeant is amongst one of Australia’s finest winemakers and produces an exceptional range of estate-grown wines, ensuring the unique characteristics of each vintage and varietal style are harnessed to produce exceptional wines. Guests can choose from an extensive list including sparkling, pinot gris, sauvignon blanc, chardonnay, rose, pinot noir, zinfandel, shiraz and shiraz viognier, which are all on offer at the cellar door for complimentary tasting.

Terindah Estate’s 2012 Shiraz received the highest shiraz honour at the 2013 National Wine Show - the Shiraz Trophy, alongside a gold medal and a score of 97 points by James Halliday, who also rated the winery 4.5 stars in the 2015 Australian Wine Companion.

It is no wonder Tourism Victoria rated Terindah Estate as one of Victoria’s top five regional restaurant’s to visit. Terindah offers a unique food and wine venue unlike any other; watch the mussel farmers in the local waters, stroll through the vineyard and wander down to the private beach. Admire the stunning architectural events spaces and spectacular views while dining on skilfully crafted boutique food and wine.

If you are on the lookout for a cellar door wine tasting experience, leisurely lunch, weekend breakfast or sophisticated wedding or events venue, visit the Bellarine’s most beautiful estate and experience all that Terindah has to offer.

Cellar Door Cafe: Open 10.00am—4.00pm daily The Shed: Open Wed-Sun for lunch from noon & weekend breakfast from 8am.

w w w. t e r i n d a h e s t a t e . c o m

55 Ruby Autumn

ruby competition

cutest comp THE OF THE YEAR 56 Ruby Autumn

First dreamed up as a way to make the daughter of the creator of the adorable Ballerina & Me dolls smile, these cuties could have the little girl in your life literally dancing with joy.

Designed by local mumtrepreneur, Rini Lombard, the dolls have straps on their feet and hands so, once attached, they follow the movements of a dancing child and that’s enough to make any little ballerina smile.

The fabulous Rini, who featured in our spring edition, has kindly provided five of her ballerina dolls for some very lucky Ruby winners. We have three 43cm (17²) dolls, Lily, Ava Rose and Sunday, to give away, as well as 2 very special main prizes, the child-size 90cm (3¹7²) Summer and Ruby! Awwww.

To enter, simply email: abbey@adcellgroup.com.au or head to our Facebook page, like and tell us which beautiful doll you would like win Summer, Ruby, Ava Rose, Sunday or Lily?

Competition closes Sunday May 31st at 11.59pm.

Winners announced on Monday the 1st of June via Facebook and/or email.

Want to know more, or think you just found your next present for a special little girl you know?

Visit www.ballerinaandmedoll.com.au for more information.

57 Ruby Autumn

7

ruby kids

things everyone needs to know about children, whether you have them or not.

Laura writes the hilariously honest parenting blog, Poo, Spew and Superglue on Aussie Blogs, http://wildchild.aussieblogs.com.au. She is raising two small hell raisers, with the third, and final, and scariest, having just arrived to really make things interesting. She lives in Jan Juc and will be a regular commentator on the beauty of parenting (snort) in Ruby magazine.

58 Ruby Autumn

ruby kids

I’ve only got two children and neither has made their fifth birthday yet. But, it turns out that while their behaviour may be bizarre, frustrating and hilarious, often all before 6am, it is absolutely normal. And so it made me think what these little tyrants might look like from outer space. Or to my self-absorbed, recently single, corporate baby brother.

They do not sleep when required.

Everything is a weapon.

The thing about sleep is that it affects every single part of your life. And when you are not getting any, it feels like hell. You are cranky, short-tempered, frustrated, tired and miserable. You know when you’ve had a big night and you feel a bit scratchy the next day? Well, it’s like that. All the time, except without the fun party night and embarrassing photos to go with it. And instead of heading off to work to hide in an office or behind a desk, or just have a sleep in or a lie on the couch, you remain at the coalface, deep in the trenches, fending off thrown food, responding to ridiculous demands and having to complete mundane tasks like putting a complex Lego Police Headquarters together with Peppa-freaking-Pig in the background. Sorry, still raw. So, aliens/ helpful uncles, if you see a parent lying face down on the floor of the playroom letting their children draw a treasure map on their brand new jeans, don’t judge, just pass them a pillow.

I have boys, so perhaps this feature is more pertinent to the House of Penis that I live in. Everything that is mobile can be used as a weapon. Seriously, pretend you are Brick from Anchorman and just start naming random objects around you right now. Yes, yes and yes, they are all weapons. The cushions from the couch?

Weapon and also trampoline. Plastic spoon from the yoghurt? Yes. Yoghurt?

Yes. Bowl the yoghurt is in? Yes. Not to mention the sporting equipment, Lego, and the latest beautiful wooden toys; all effective weapons. So, when you buy gifts, look carefully at it and ask yourself, not whether this could be used as a weapon, but just how much damage it might do.

Children can survive without eating anything other than biscuits for a long, long time.

To all the parents of small terrorists out there; tonight, after you cook dinner, put it in the blender, throw in some cold water, splatter it all over the table and on the floor and then throw half of it in the bin. Because at least this way you have saved yourself the angst of attempting to feed it to whichever child is on a hunger strike. And it’s not just the cooking, it’s the shopping. Okay, let’s rephrase that, shopping with more than one small child in a busy supermarket should be an Olympic Sport. Seriously, if one hasn’t escaped the trolley, or stolen food, or hidden under the shelves, or climbed the shelves, they are hollering at the top of their lungs for whatever garbage food I have said no to.

Then you get it in the car, out of the car, in the fridge, off the floor, out from behind the couch and then you cook it. So, when they push it away without even a sniff, dear alien/uncle, that is why I have turned around and am yelling into the freezer; because unlike my children, the food doesn’t have feelings.

When small children who are not toilet trained don’t have a nappy on, they shit.

You would think as parents we would know this. And yet the amount of times a kid without a nappy on has left some chocolate nuggets on my carpet, in the bath, on the deck is beyond belief – and the kid doesn’t always live here.

Sometimes they shit their pants because they are too busy doing something else.

Sometimes they leave one floating in the pool. And you know what the worst part is, they cannot clean it up. So the red-faced parent is left to almost vomit on themselves as they clean shit out of the carpet/ the undies/ the shopping trolley/ the bath/ the public pool. Hell, the last camping trip even had one smeared all across the jumping pillow. Yep, aliens/child-free uncle: small children actually are that gross.

They cry.

All. The. Time. Sometimes it is for good reason. But mostly it is for the exact opposite of the reason they were crying five minutes ago. And man, are they loud.

They cry to get in the bath, then cry to get their hair washed and then cry again to get out of the bath. They cry because they are hungry, and because the sandwich is made incorrectly, and because it is on the wrong plate, or in the wrong shape on the right plate, or because it has fallen apart when they picked it up. And now, because they threw it on the floor and the dog ate it.

They cry because they are tired, and then they cry because they have to go to bed.

If you see them crying, I know they are annoying you, but at least you can leave the room, or house, or country. Me, I’m still trying to figure out how to sneak into the bathroom without either of them noticing.

They are freaking hilarious.

This is perhaps the most annoying and misunderstood feature of the creature we call small children. In reality, only your own kid is funny. Oh, and that kid who did a commercial for a health care company many years ago; and the one in the toilet cubicle next to yours offering a running commentary on everyone’s wee. But in your own simple world of cleaning up, entertaining, organising and parenting, the one innocent comment that makes you giggle with delight is bliss. They can crack you up, and when they do, they are absolutely delighted. It might be when they are pretending to sleep in their bed during the day telling you they are trying to get some patience, or ripping out some excellent air guitar to The Boss when they thought no one was watching, or just farting on their brother with a nude bum.

It makes you laugh so hard you wet your pants, again. And you don’t actually have to understand the story, or think it’s funny, but just nod with us when it is the only story we have to tell at the latest family catch up.

They love.

You might see this from above, you might hear it talked about, you might even read some ridiculous soppy post about it on Facebook, but only cos it’s the kid’s birthday. But it’s true. They love. It is fierce and furious and feels like it will last forever.

It comes in cuddles and sloppy full kisses on the mouth. It comes in the sheer delight on their faces when they see you. It comes in beautiful artwork from day care with some cheesy pun. It comes in a midnight cuddle in bed. And when they are old enough and realise how much it makes your heart melt, it even comes out of their little mouths. It is harder to see, but you sure know when you’ve got it.

words laura gordon 59 Ruby Autumn

ruby kids

The Bea n Bible

Preg nan cy in yo u r m id t wenti es , an d th e ab u n dan c e o f advi c e yo u ’ll r ec eive

Madelin is a media professional and mother-in-waiting and a welcome new addition to the Ruby Ladies.

Her tell it like it is pregnancy blog, The Bean Bible, can be found at http://thebeanbible.com

C

hris and I met in a hurry – my first night in a job in England, and he was in town on training with the Army. It was three months of rushed madness before he decided to leave eight years of everything he knew, complete a stint in Afghanistan and plan the move to Australia with me. I’m sure everyone thought we were crazy, but we knew it was right and almost four years later it’s never been better.

We always wanted kids at some point, admittedly probably I more than him (I didn’t want to be ‘old’ when I started a family, did I?), but we came to think we might end up needing some help in that department. We spoke about tests, even the possibility that we might need to use IVF, but all very loosely, very ‘for our future selves to think about’. Around my 25th birthday, and our three-year anniversary, I started to get huge aching boobs, and because I’d been traveling a bit (and OK, because I have a terrible memory for these things), I couldn’t remember the last time I may have had a period. I distinctly remember laughing with the girls at work as I went to the doctors to do a just-in-case test when he turned and said to me “Yes, you’re very pregnant”.

What does that even mean!? Very pregnant? Poor Chris was doing a oneday labour job for a new company, and couldn’t even leave to come and see me – and I couldn’t keep it inside my head for the next 8 hours, so the poor love had to work a whole day knowing his world had just changed, and have no one to speak to. I on the other hand absent-mindedly walked to my mum’s house, feeling like a naughty 15 year-old teenager about to break some terrible news. Did anyone else ever feel like this telling their parents?

Fast-forward eight months and we’re on the verge of a huge new chapter – we’ve just brought a house, and our baby will be here in around six weeks time. The advice is rife – “eat hot wings and you’ll go in labour” and “you’ll be right love, people have been popping them our behind trees for years” are just two pearlers I’ve been on the receiving end of in the last few months. Besides some terrible back pain, and the general pregnancy woes and exhaustion, we’ve been lucky – we have a super strong family unit on my side, providing everything from advice to more clothes than a newborn could possibly wear, and are in constant contact with his family with updates and who are coming over

words madelin baldwin from the bean bible 60 Ruby Autumn

for the birth. His Mum is a nurse and will stay with us (and she’s also lovely and English and will completely not be overbearing, which I LOVE).

Without the family support, and having a couple of friends going through the same life stages, I could see this being completely isolating at times, to be honest. The amount of times we go for drinks, or to functions, and I’m suddenly on the other side of the table: sober, driving and not finding the jokes threehours in as funny as they do. Was I that funny? You bet! I’ve stopped being invited to things on weekends because people assume since I can’t drink, well, I can’t possibly have fun anymore can I? Haven’t they seem me perform Mariah Carey’s greatest hits? I don’t need a wine in me for that …

I wouldn’t change it though – the twicenightly trips to the toilet, the aching back and the constant exhaustion are, as everyone will remind you, “just getting you ready for the baby”. Here’s my question to you though readers – How on EARTH do people contemplate going back for their second, third and fourth?

Oh that’s right, “you forget all of that pain as soon as the babies here”!

ruby money

Money vid for spendy kids Just like adults, some kids seem to have a natural willingness to save, while others will spend everything they have – in advance, if possible.

It’s obvious that education is one way of narrowing the gap between the financially savvy and the spendy types, and the earlier that education can begin, the more effective it’s likely to be.

But, all too often, broaching the money subject makes us sound like our grandmothers talking about rainy days and going without, with a smattering of ‘when I was young’ … yawn.

Financial comparison site, RateCity, has come up with a way for parents to avoid the lecture, that still brings home the savings message, with a cute video about a little turtle called Tinka who has to go without her favourite treat, chocolate fish, to save up for a scooter. There’s also a series of videos for parents, with some creative ideas for getting kids interested in saving and spending wisely.

“Young children have the ability to soak up a lot of information. Parents and teachers have a great opportunity to leave a lasting impression on young minds when it comes to creating good money habits,” said Marketing Director for RateCity, Ali Cassim, in a statement released to announce the launch of the videos.

Ms Cassim says despite recent developments, Australian schools are still behind the eight ball when it comes to teaching young children about money.

“Schools in the UK and the US have introduced financial education subjects as a compulsory and formal part of their curriculum, but this is still not the case in Australia,” she said.

In fact, as a nation, we haven’t been great at instilling basic numeracy in kids before they start school. Recent ABS data show that 17 per cent of Australian kids start school without being able to recognise number and count to 20.

“Thanks to the internet, families can take matters into their own hands and teach kids about money at home. Our video series is all about arming them with the tools they need to do that,” Ms Cassim said, and the younger the better.

“We have put our thinking caps on for parents and have come up with some great ways to get kids involved,” she said.

“Money doesn’t have to be a daunting topic, we want kids to enjoy the process of learning to earn, save and invest.”

Parents can find the RateCity kids saving cartoon and vidoes for parents at www. ratecity.com.au/savings-accounts/news/ financially-savvy-kids Disclaimer To the extent that any RateCity Pty Limited data, ratings or commentary constitutes general advice, this advice has been prepared by RateCity Pty Limited ABN 12 122 743 542 AFSL 316710 and does not take into account your individual investment objectives, financial circumstances or needs.

Information provided on and available from this site does not constitute financial, taxation or other professional advice and should not be relied upon as such. RateCity Pty Limited recommends that, before you make any financial decision, you seek professional advice from a suitably qualified adviser.

Product Disclosure Statement relating to the product should also be obtained and considered before any decision about whether to acquire the product.

Please refer to RateCity’s FSCG for more information.

61 Ruby Autumn

ruby Q&A

When Child Care Doesn’t Cut It We all know there are gaps in the standard child care centre model. If you work at night, or have to travel for your work, work on differing shifts or have a number of children, it can feel like you’re out of options. This is why two local women decided to start a nanny agency, Geelong Nannies, and yes, just like Mary Poppins, their nannies sing songs and play games, all sorts…

• How did Geelong Nannies come about and who is behind it?

Melanie Holland, mother of three young children, and Juliet Martin, professional nanny, created Geelong Nannies in 2011 when they knew from personal experience that there was a strong demand for a nanny agency in the Geelong region.

Having been involved in using other Melbourne agencies, they knew they wanted to be different to cater to families needs and provide a high quality service with a personal, understanding touch.

• What kind of families use Geelong Nannies services?

All sorts of families use our service for various different reasons. Families with busy working parents, those who have no family support, those who don’t/can’t use day care and even those who need a full night’s sleep with an overnight nanny for their newborn. We have regular, casual and one-off clients.

attention and are comfortable in their own home environment, keeping to their routines. The nanny helps with duties around the home, so the parents come home to a tidy, organized place with happy entertained children who are fed, bathed and in their pj’s.

• Are nannies available nights / mornings / weekends? Will they cover overnight shifts?

Nannies help with anything a family needs to fill the gap, including days, evenings, overnights, short shifts or very long days and even short term live-in roles when parents go away.

• Is it expensive?

• How does a nanny service differ from child care centres?

Having a nanny on a regular basis can cost more than day care as there is no rebate for in-home care unless families meet very strict criteria. It may work out to be more affordable having a nanny for multiple children, as she can have up to 4 children on the same pay rate. Their rate is standard and our booking fees are reasonable and includes full insurance cover.

Having a nanny is extremely different to child-care as the children have individual

• Do the nannies sing songs, play games .. All sorts? Will they, in short,

• • • • •

be Mary Poppins (or Nanny McPhee)?

Absolutely, they sing, dance, play endless games and take children on fun outings. They are responsible for child development, educational play, providing age-appropriate activities, entertainment and general health and well-being. They can help with homework, drive the children to and from school/kinder/activities.

• What if I need housekeeping?

Nannies can prepare and serve meals, and tidy the kitchen, including dishes. They can help around the house with washing, light cleaning, running errands and shopping.

They can bath the children, get them ready for bed and put them to bed if required.

The children are always the first priority and our nannies will only undertake house duties when your child is sleeping or happily playing within eyesight.

• What do Geelong Nannies’ clients say about the nanny service?

Our clients are forever grateful to us for having someone to solve their child minding requirements. They love that they can call, email or text us to book a nanny, sometimes at short notice.

Reliable Trustworthy Responsible Professional Simple

We believe in helping local families with their babysitting & nanny requirements by providing a high quality personal service.

www.geelongnannies.com.au 62 Ruby Autumn

Ruby

Kids Reads The True Meaning of Smekday Daisy Malone and the Blue Glowing Stone

Love and other Perishable Items

James O’Loghlin

Laura Buzo

You may know James O’Loghlin from ABC radio or The New Inventors, but the criminal lawyer, comedian and media presenter also writes children’s fiction … probably to try to fill in his days! His first foray into kids books was last year’s The Adventures of Sir Roderick the Not-Very-Brave, which was an inventive and hilariously silly story wrapped around some very human, very believable motivations.

Now, James has introduced Daisy Malone, a 12 year-old girl who knows someone needs to save the world and figures it may as well be her. Her father is scared of everything, her mother has disappeared, and she and her dog Ben (a highly intelligent, talking dog - his words!) have just found a mysterious blue glowing stone in the attic. But what is it, and why does everyone want it?

This witty and smart coming-of-age romance was shortlisted for the Prime Minister’s Literary Award. From the moment 15-year-old Amelia gets an after-school job at the local supermarket she is sunk, gone, lost, head-over-heels in love with Chris. Chris is the funny, charming, man-aboutWoolies; but he’s also 21 and in his final year at uni.

The six-year age gap may as well be a hundred. Chris and Amelia talk about everything from Second Wave Feminism to Great Expectations and Alien, but will he ever look at her in the way she wants him to? A story that’s real and warm and just a little bit heartbreaking.

The ASTOUNDING BROCCOLI BOY

Adam Rex

Frank Cottrell Boyce

If you have kids in your life, chances are you have already seen or are going soon to see the movie Home.

The movie is adorable, and will have Sheldon from Big Bang Theory’s voice in your head for weeks to come.

But before the movie, there was the book, and that book is The True Meaning of Smekday. It’s also super-cute and very funny, but has a darker, more true-to-life edge that kids will love. Mum’s can be weird, we all know that, and for Gratuity Tucci (Tip, to her friends), she’s kind of used to her mum being different. But then her mum starts acting really weird, then disappears and Tip just wants to keep it together that is, until the Boov invade.

Determined to stay away from the Boov and find her mum, Tip packs her cat, Pig, in the car and heads to where the humans are going, to Florida. But she isn’t the only one on the run, and a Boov with the adopted Earth name of J.Lo, is just the advantage that Tip needs..

My 8 year-old saw this and immediately said, ‘Cool! Can I read it Mum?’ And that probably says everything you need to know. With one of the best book titles of the year, this is the story of Rory Rooney, a kid who likes to be prepared for all eventualities.

His favourite book is Don’t Be Scared, Be Prepared, and he has memorized every page of it. He could even survive a hippo attack. He knows that just because something is unlikely doesn’t mean it won’t ever happen . . . But Rory isn’t prepared when he suddenly and inexplicably turns green.

Stuck in an isolation ward in a hospital far from home with two other remarkably green children, Rory’s as confused by his new condition as the medics seem to be. But what if it’s not in their genes, or a virus, or something they ate?

What if turning green actually means you’ve turned into a superhero? Rory can’t wait to make it past hospital security and discover exactly what his superpower might be . . .

63 Ruby Autumn

ruby kids

The after school

witching hour

3

:35pm is the new ‘witching hour’ in our house. Give me a screaming newborn at 6pm any day over a hungry school child – at least babies can’t open fridge doors, or turn your kitchen of neatly stacked shelves into something resembling a cyclone in 0 to 5 seconds.

This is another of those things that nobody ever told me about when I had a child. How come it’s taken me an entire 12 months to figure out that a child needs to be fed immediately, immediately (emphasis on that word) after they walk out of their classroom? What do they do with the beautifully packed lunch that I make them each day? I have little compartments for protein snacks to keep them fuller for longer, fruit for energy bursts, water bottle for hydration and carbohydrates for sustained energy. Why are they hungry?

piled high and strategically placed right beside the front door, so they can’t miss it. If you happen to walk past my house on your way home from school you’ll hear nothing but quiet munching, chirping birds and the occasional ‘Don’t even think about going near that drawer/ fridge/ cupboard unless that plate is empty!’ bellowed out by mwah.

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Quick

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Nutritious

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Include healthy fats to get the kids through till dinner time

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Able to be eaten on your way to after school activities

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Prepared in advance

I’m also watching you other mothers like a hawk – you can call me stalker. I need to figure out how the rest of you are getting around this 3:35pm torment. I watched a mum last week turn up at the school gate with little goodies tucked in her handbag. As her children ran to her with open arms she handed them each a snack and they smiled sweetly and said ‘thank you’. I watched her in awe then sighed as my two terrors threw their bags at my feet, tempers-a-brewing, stating

Most days I make up a big plate full of grab and go goodies that include:

“Nobody can remember who said cereal had to be for breakfast and meat was for dinner, so mix it up. Granola and yoghurt is a perfectly acceptable meal at 7pm and, likewise, there is nothing w r o n g w i t h v e g e t a b l e s o u p f o r b r e a k fa s t .”

Rant and rage aside, I’m getting smarter.

I’ve now locked out 2:45 – 3pm in my diary with a nice bright red heading ‘make afternoon tea’. That space is sacred, non-negotiable, a don’t-evenask-for-an-appointment-at-that-time‘cause-it-ain’t-gonna-happen kind of space. I lay out afternoon tea on a platter

loudly ‘I’m hungry!’ I’m stealing her idea.

I’ve also come up with a little formula to keep me on track. I’ve tried various snack ideas and have found that some work and some definitely don’t. To avoid witching hour stretching out for longer than necessary, the after school snack needs to be: words nicole beardsley, the happy parent project

64 Ruby Autumn

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Boiled eggs

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Corn chips with hummus

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Fruit

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Mountain bread, spread with avocado and rolled up

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Popcorn popped in coconut oil and lightly salted

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Nuts and Organic dried fruit

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Smoothies made from almond milk, frozen banana, frozen avocado, honey and berries.

On any day of the week you’ll also find the humble jar of pesto lurking in the back of my fridge. He’s my friend – my very healthy, always ready, reliable friend.

And I suggest you make him yours too.

He’s always there when you’ve run out of anything else (nobody will touch him, I swear). On his own, he’s not much to rave about, but when you pair him with some cheese and mix him with some pasta, or grill him between sheets of pastry, or even slather him on a flat bread, he becomes your witching hour savior. Trust me.

WITCHING HOUR SAVIORS

Basic pesto recipe • 1 cup basil leaves (you can also add in baby spinach or kale leaves to boost the green content) • ½ cup sunflower seeds (or pine nuts) • ½ cup olive oil • 2 cloves garlic • ¼ cup Parmesan cheese • Salt to taste Blend all together and store in a jar in the fridge. It will last several weeks.

Green Pizza Spread 2 flat breads (we use spelt) or tortillas with 2-3 tablespoons of pesto. Sprinkle with grated cheese and cook for 10 minutes at 180 degrees or until golden. Slice into 8 pieces and serve hot or cold. If you want you can add other pizza toppings such as onion, tomato, mushroom, ham and pineapple.

Pesto Pizza Boil up some pasta and mix 2-3 tablespoons of pesto through it. Serve hot or cold.

Pesto Pastry Twists Take 1 sheet of ready rolled puff pastry. Spread 2-3 Tb of pesto over it. Sprinkle with grated cheese. Place another sheet on top. Cut the pastry into 3 cm strips. Take each strip and twist it then place on a baking tray lined with greaseproof paper. Bake at 180 degrees for 10 minutes or until golden.

Serve hot or cold.

Nicole's Upcoming Workshops Activate Your Dream Biz & Family Life A one day workshop for Mums that want to take their passion and turn it into a profitable business. In this full day workshop you'll learn how to juggle managing a home with running a business whilst still staying healthy, calm and in control. ​ Nicole will get you organised and show you how to prioritise your day and Lara from IndieLime will teach you how to brand your business to get noticed and start making a profit. A MUST for any Mum in small business.

Date: Sunday July 19th Time: 8am - 4:30pm Venue: Ocean Grove

For further information and tickets please visit www.thehappyparentproject.com​

www.thehappyparentproject.com https://www.facebook.com/thehappyparentproject 65 Ruby Autumn

ruby book club

AUTUMN READS

Anatolia Somer Sivrioglu & David Dale

A feast in every sense, this gorgeous exploration of the cultural cooking of Turkey, including a collection of re-imagined recipes of traditional Turkish cuisine is one to savour. With its beautiful cloth-bound hard cover this is one cookbook that is just too pretty to live on a shelf. With recipes ranging from those inspired by the grand banquets of the Ottoman empire to the spicy snacks of Istanbul’s street stalls, Anatolia is a delicious treat for the eyes, taste buds and imagination.

5:2 Lifestyle

The Unbakery

Delphine De Montalier & Charlotte Debeugny

It’s the diet we can all do, because it’s not a diet. The 5:2 revolution has swept the world, with its proven weight loss and cellular health benefits, and the key is finding meals and snacks that come under 500 calories for those two fast days each week. Sound familiar? Then 5:2 Lifestyle may just be the answer for you, with 100 recipes, 4 weeks of sample menus and packed with tips on how to integrate the 5:2 diet into your lifestyle.

Before I Go

Megan May

Colleen Oakley

This gem of a book from Auckland chef and owner of the award-winning Little Bird Organics and The Unbakery cafes, Megan May, is a treasure trove of raw plant-based food so yummy you won’t miss that it’s not cooked. From Mexican Tacos with Chimichurri and Salsa to a heavenly Blueberry Cheesecake, there are inspirational recipes packed with fresh fruit and vegetables. All recipes are free from gluten, dairy and cane sugar; all are achievable, unfussy and seriously delicious.

Daisy is dying. At just 27, there are so many things she still has to do, but with a very short timeline to work with, she focuses on finding her wonderful husband a new wife, because she knows he won’t cope alone. As she searches with singular determination for the right woman, she begins to realise that her plan to ensure Jack’s happiness is much more complicated than she expected. Lovely, funny, heartbreaking and heartwarming, this is one of those books that makes you laugh and makes you cry.

Vale, Terry Pratchett British writer, Sir Terry Pratchett passed away on 12 March, at home, surrounded by his family, with his cat curled up on his bed. The best-selling Discworld author was a wordsmith in the truest sense of the term. He had a way of taking words and expressions we thought we knew and understood, turning them on their head and making them waggle their bums and flash their knickers at us. He wrote about things that are really here – the very good, the very bad, but mostly the very ordinary - in a place went through imagination and came out the other side. Diagnosed with a rare form of early-onset Alzheimer’s, Sir Terry spoke openly about the disease that would take his life all too quickly, donated generously to research into the disease in the hope that in the future their might be a cure, and became a powerful advocate for end of life choice.

ruby book club

Mothers & Others

The Secrets of Midwives

Unforgettable

The First Bad Man

Various

Sally Hepworth

Simon Scott

Miranda July

And speaking of mothers… this is a very different meditation on motherhood.

Mothers & Others is a collection of fiction and non-fiction thought-pieces from Australian women writers on motherhood, with contributions from Debora-lee Furness, Rosie Batty, Melina Marchetta, Liane Moriarty, Miriam Sved, Geraldine Brooks, Alice Pung, Brook Davis and many more. Their stories tackle everything from the decision not to have children to the so-called battle between working and stay-at-home mums. From infertility and IVF, to step-parenting and adoption, to miscarriage and breastfeeding, child meltdowns and marriage breakdowns, the stories explore and celebrate the full gamut of the motherhood experience, and give a much needed voice to those who won’t ever be called ‘Mum’.

And even in the world of fictional escapism, the publishing world is awash with family-focused tales this autumn season. I read this one over two days and relished its calmness, its gentle intrigue – it felt like stepping back to greet women from my past – with a few tears and a few chuckles along the way. Neva Bradley, a third-generation midwife, is determined to keep the details surrounding her own pregnancy - including the identity of the baby’s father - hidden from her family and co-workers for as long as possible. Her mother, Grace, finds it impossible to let this secret rest, even while her own life begins to crumble around her. And for Floss, Neva’s grandmother and a retired midwife, Neva’s situation thrusts her back 60 years in time to a secret that eerily mirrors her granddaughter’s-a secret which, if revealed, will have life-changing consequences for them all.

From feasts for the tummy to a feast for the heart, Unforgettable is a love letter from a son to his mother, interspersed with the Twitter updates he posted from his mother’s bedside in ICU that captured the attention and emotions of followers around the world. Squeezing the magnitude of his final days with her into 140-character updates, Simon’s evocative and moving meditations spread virally. Over the course of a few days, Simon chronicled his mother’s death and reminisced about her life, revealing her humour and strength, and celebrating familial love. His mother was a glamorous woman of the Mad Men-era; she worked in nightclubs, modelled, dated mobsters and movie stars, and was a brave single parent to young Scott Simon.

This incredibly rich and moving tribute is a heartwarming reminder that Yes, some kids really do cherish their mums for their whole life. You’ll love it, I did.

“A book that must be read, a book that must be purchased - in duplicate one for you, one for a friend.

Don’t think you can loan this book - you’ll never get it back” - A. M. HOMES. Cheryl Glickman believes in romances that span centuries and a soul that migrates between babies.

She works at a women’s self-defence non-profit and lives alone. When her bosses ask if their twenty year-old daughter, Clee, can move into her house for a while, Cheryl’s eccentrically ordered world explodes. And yet it is Clee - the selfish, cruel blonde bombshell - who bullies Cheryl into reality and, unexpectedly, leads her to the love of a lifetime. Tender, gripping, slyly hilarious, infused with raging sexual fantasies and fierce maternal love, this is one book you just have to read. It’s not easy going – but it’s amazing.

67 Ruby Autumn

Servicing Geelong since

G en e r a l Public Welcom e!

Whethe r you are af ter just one item or wish to buy in b u lk .

The vari et y of p roducts Byars ha s to of fe r is amazing .

1985

store • wrap carry • bake • serve & much more Byars Flexible Packaging have a huge range of food containers.

From takeaway food containers in various sizes to eco-friendly paper plates and platters, cake boxes, lollies bags and wrapping.

They have an amazing variety of bits and pieces making Byars your one stop shop for all your disposable packaging needs.

www.byars.com.au