HUMOR 19
OCTOBER 16, 2014
Panic without “Pretty Pretty Pretty Princesses” these shipments, but so are local communities around the Untied States. Six-year-old Cindy Jones his past Sunday Walmart (pictured right) from Lake Forest, workers were in a panic Minnesota was brought to tears by when all of the shipments of the this news. “All I wanted to be, for “Pretty Pretty Pretty Princess” the rest of my life, was a “Pretty Halloween costumes disappeared. Pretty Pretty Princess” and now Elijah Beck, Head of Sales at I have to be a stupid witch. Why Walmart, said, “Walmart is on a did this have to happen to me? red alert right now. Those princess Mommy!” said Jones through her costumes were going to carry us snot and tears. through this Halloween season. Target representative, Julie The loss of those costumes is Schneider, commented on the issue really going to put us behind on saying, “Target feels for the loss sales.” Their high quality satin and imported lace puts these princess costumes above the rest. The estimated sale of these costumes is 12.5 million for this Halloween alone. Not only is the Walmart community suffering from the loss of by Lauren Clapp Editor of Awesome
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Illustration by Killian Beck
of these Walmart shipments, but I would like to let the children of the community know that Target is carrying the “Pretty Pretty Pretty Princess” costumes in rose pink, lilac purple and teal blue.” (The characters and events portrayed in this article are fictitious. Any similarity to real persons living or dead is coincidental and not intended by the author.)
The Purge Cartoon by Joe Jennings Trick or treat your friends with these punny Halloween jokes! How do you fix a jack-o-lantern? With a pumpkin patch. What did the French fries dress up as for Halloween? Masked Potatoes. What do you call a ghost in a torn sheet? A holy terror. What is a witches favorite subject in school? Spelling. Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road? Because he didn’t have any guts. Why doesn’t Dracula have any friends? Because he is a pain in the neck.