Southside Boomers - Winter 2015

SOUTHSIDE

BOOMERS

WINTER 2015

A DAILY JOURNAL PUBLICATION

In Tune

Married later in life, couple makes beautiful music together INSIDE

Hospital’s adult volunteer program

Vinyl music experiencing a renaissance of sorts

Travel: Visit the mysterious holloways of Dorset, England

SOUTHSIDE

BOOMERS

WINTER 2015

ON THE COVER SOUTHSIDE

BOOMERS

WINTER 2015

A DAILY JOURNAL PUBLICATION

In Tune

Married later in life, couple makes beautiful music together INSIDE

Hospital’s adult volunteer program

Vinyl music experiencing a renaissance of sorts

Travel: Visit the mysterious holloways of Dorset, England

One More Time Retired educators find a second chance at love with each other.

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Back in Black Vinyl records are returning to popularity.

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Cover photo by Mark Freeland

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Helping Out

A Walk in the Woods

Volunteer program a hit at Johnson Memorial Hospital.

England’s Dorset area features some interesting holloways.

ALSO INSIDE Tanya Tucker making a comeback Carly Simon reveals object of famous song Sharon Randall column How to eat healthy this holiday season Southside Boomers is published by the DAILY JOURNAL

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southside boomers I winter 2015

ENTERTAINMENT

Tanya Tucker on the comeback trail

By ALLISON STEWART Chicago Tribune n the ’70s, Tanya Tucker was a teen sensation, famous for hits like “Delta Dawn.” In the mid-’80s, she was reborn as a countrypop star. Throughout, she was a tabloid bad girl with a reputation for raising hell, locked in an infamous on-again, off-again relationship with Glen Campbell.

Tucker and Campbell were the Blake and Miranda of their day, only more famous, and more screwed up: He was a 40-something country superstar, several times divorced, his career just beginning its downward swing. She was half his age, and in between hits. They drank and brawled, broke up and got back together. They performed for President Reagan together, had hits together, courted and feuded in full public view.

There were suicide attempts (her, according to Campbell), a freebasing OD (him), then the inevitable breakup.

“I regret a lot of things,” Tucker, 57, says in a phone interview. “I broke up with him and he came back and wanted to fix things up, but I was too cocky. I wanted him to try a little harder. One more time would’ve worked, you know?”

Before they could reconcile, Tucker says, one of Campbell’s band members set him up with the woman to whom he is still married.

“I think he was just on the rebound, in my opinion,” Tucker says. “She don’t like me, but I

I

Simon says part of ‘You’re So Vain’ is about Warren Beatty

Associated Press arly Simon says the second verse of her infamous song “You’re So Vain” is about Warren Beatty.

The 70-year-old singer tells People magazine that she’s “confirmed that the second verse is Warren.” She adds that Beatty “thinks the whole thing is about him!”

Simon released the memoir, “Boys in the Trees,” in November. The subjects behind “You’re So Vain,” released in 1972, have been a matter of speculation for years.

The singer said the No. 1 hit is about three men, including Beatty, though she isn’t naming the others.

Simon was married to James Taylor, and People says she has been linked to Mick Jagger, Tanya Tucker performs at The River Front Stage as part of the 2015 CMA Music Festival in Kris Kristofferson, Jack Nicholson and Cat June in Nashville./AP PHOTO Stevens. B

C

think of anything that would trigger his memory.

When I was done, he kissed the phone. So I got that, at least. … It may be all I ever get, but that was wonderful.”

While Campbell is a revered legacy artist, Tucker, one of the most successful female singers in country music history, is less celebrated. Many of her hits came during the genre’s low point in the ’80s, when glittery, rhinestone country ruled the charts. She has yet to be embraced by a cool

“My dad said, ‘Well, I don’t think anybody wants you right now.’

That put a fire under me.”

Tanya Tucker have nothing against her. I appreciate her taking care of him all these years, because I know he’s a handful.”

These days, Tucker is attempting to launch a comeback, while Campbell, 79, has Alzheimer’s.

According to Tucker, Campbell’s children are allowed limited access to him, and aren’t allowed to bring in phones or take photos. “They can’t just go see their dad, which I think is horrible.”

Tucker isn’t allowed to see him, either, she says, though Campbell’s oldest daughter once set up a FaceTime call between the former lovers.

“I was talking to him, going, ‘Remember me?

I’m Tanya, we used to love each other.’ Trying to

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kid like Jack White or Rick Rubin, and has lately struggled to find her place.

Tucker’s current tour is her first in years, and she hasn’t released a studio album since 2009. “I was off for about four years, just going through some times. I lost both my parents, and kind of lost my mojo.”

The Country Music Hall of Fame put up an exhibit dedicated to Tucker last year. “I sort of had to show up for that,” she says. “I guess the wheels started turning real fast, and all of a sudden I got new management, new band, new everything.”

Tucker had been managed by her father, Beau,

who died in 2006. When she was 9 years old, Tucker remembers, her father asked her if she would rather be a normal person or a country singer. The Tuckers were poor and living in Arizona; for Tanya, it wasn’t much of a choice.

“I probably didn’t know the particulars of what I was getting into, but I was all for it,” she says. “It seemed to make him happy when I would sing.

He said, ‘You’re gonna have to sing twice as good, with twice as much feeling as the person who sang (this song) originally, because you’re 9 years old, and they’re not going to believe you. … Put it in there like Hank Williams would.’ He was my teacher. I could use a little bit of that right now.”

Post-Campbell, when Tucker ran into trouble with substance abuse, her father helped her clean up (so did Betty Ford).

“He moved me back to Nashville (from Los Angeles), and I had to stay with him until I got myself straightened out,” Tucker says. “I didn’t have a record deal, and my dad said, ‘Well, I don’t think anybody wants you right now.’ That put a fire under me. I said, ‘Get me an appointment.

Let me show them what I can do.’ By the end of the meeting, I had a record deal.”

Tucker’s post-rehab career upswing began in 1986 and lasted more than 10 years. Then came the usual: an autobiography, a covers album, a reality show. Navigating the modern day music industry was difficult enough when her father was SEE TANYA, PAGE 23

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southside boomers I winter 2015

A second chance at happiness Finding love again enriches already full lives STORY BY AMY MAY PHOTOS BY MARK FREELAND

T

he love story of Norman Knight and Rebecca Courtney-Knight began on Sept. 23, 2003.

Their story is not the whirlwind romance typical of the young — the leap-before-you-look love affair that so often ends in regret. As a baby boomer couple, they stepped a little more carefully. They had years of experience to guide them. They knew they each had a lot to offer a potential mate and a lot more to lose, as well.

Rebecca, who goes by Becky, had been divorced for about five years. She had raised her daughters, Amanda and Rachel, to adulthood. She was happy with her work as an administrator for Clark-Pleasant Community Schools and had achieved her dream of having a home in the country, building a house with cathedral ceilings, wooden decks and lots of windows on 10 wooded acres west of Trafalgar.

Becky, 63, was happy on her own.

“The first thing I told (Norman) when we met is ‘I don’t want to date; I don’t want a relationship,’” she said. “I guess I felt divorce was a failure, so that was a reason why I didn’t plan another relationship.”

Norman, 64, lost his beloved wife of 25 years, Lesley, to breast cancer the previous year. They had no children. He sold their Southport home and pursued his long-held desire to live in the city, buying a condo in the Lockerbie neighborhood in Indianapolis. He was an English teacher at Clark-Pleasant Middle School, but had spent much of his youth touring with a band before settling down with his first wife.

Although he wasn’t thinking of remarriage, he did miss the companionship of a woman.

“I just wanted to go out to eat with somebody,” he said. “I realized what I was really saying was ‘I want a companion.’”

COVER STORY

COVER STORY

Above: Awards Norman Knight and Rebecca Courtney-Knight have won for participating in various running events. The couple enjoy running together. Opposite page: Norman and Rebecca in their living room with their dog, Sydney. The couple live 10 miles west of Trafalgar.

southside boomers I winter 2015 Sandy Wooten, principal at Clark-Pleasant Middle, knew both of them and had long been a proponent of a match between the two. They resisted her efforts at fixing them up until Norman tried to give Wooten his tickets to the Indiana Repertory Theatre. Wooten called Becky and talked her into going to the theater with Norman to see “Arcadia,” a play by Tom Stoppard.

They met downtown at Bazbeaux pizza restaurant on Massachusetts Avenue, a favorite spot for them both. After dinner, Becky suggested they walk to the theater instead of driving both cars and finding new parking spaces. Norman loved the idea.

“That was one of the things right from the beginning, we both enjoy physical activity,” he said. “It’s funny how you notice the little things: She likes to walk, knows the musicians I like.”

They continued to date and enjoy each other’s company, running the Indianapolis mini-marathon together and using Norman’s season tickets to the IRT. As they got to know each other, they found more to like.

Once, Norman wanted to come see Becky at her house. She said OK, but warned him she

was not planning to clean up or change clothes and that the house was a mess. The fact that he didn’t mind was very appealing to her.

“We met Sept. 23, 2003. Three years later, Sept. 23 fell on a Saturday, so we chose that day to marry,” Norman said.

He was 55 and she was 54. They married in Nashville United Methodist Church and later took their honeymoon in Arizona, where they hiked the Grand Canyon, going all the way down and back up in one day.

They chose the country life, sold the Lockerbie condo and moved into the house in the woods, which they named “Song of the Trees” because of their love of music and the outdoors.

They are both retired from Clark-Pleasant and enjoy gardening, hiking, running and participating in the music ministry at their church, where they sing in the choir and play handbells, guitar and piano. Becky also likes to spend time with her daughters and grandchildren. Norman and his friend Dan Vincent formed a band, called the Retro Brothers, and play local gigs. Norman and Becky enjoy traveling and are looking forward to a trip to the Galapagos Islands.

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southside boomers I winter 2015

COVER STORY

Norman and Becky’s home is situated on 10 wooded acres. Opposite page: The gravel lane leading to the house.

Norman also enjoys cooking. They do not eat red meat, and he looks for interesting fish recipes to try. They still have season tickets to the IRT. He keeps the ticket stubs from their first play together in a frame.

Becky is in the midst of reorganizing boxes in their finished basement and can’t find a wedding photo, but a picture of the two of them after running their first marathon is prominently and proudly displayed, perhaps offering a more accurate portrayal of their shared life and values than the posed wedding shot.

Marriage, Act II The baby boomer age group of 55 to 64 has the highest incidence of remarriage, according to the Pew Research Center. Among boomers who can remarry due to divorce or widowhood, 67 percent of them do.

“Remarriage generally becomes more common with age — not surprising, given that it takes some time to enter into one marriage, exit that marriage and then enter into a subsequent one,” said Pew’s “The Demographics of Remarriage.”

Some things are easier in a second marriage because you are a more mature person, the Knights said.

But there are complications, too. Couples have to navigate how to deal with two sets of household furnishings and two established financial profiles, as well as adult children, grandchildren, ex-spouses and new in-laws.

The Knights discussed some of the concerns they had and how they dealt with them and offered tips to other couples considering remarriage.

Tips for boomer newlyweds In addition to the emotional considerations, there are some practical issues boomer newlyweds must consider: • A new name?

Women have options now regarding their post-marriage name.

Some change it to their husband’s, some keep their maiden name and some choose both, sometimes adding a hyphen.

Becky said the process can be complicated for a divorced boomer woman. After her divorce, she kept her ex-husband’s name, Lane, so it would be the same as her daughters’. When she married Norman, her daughters were adults, so she decided to go back to her maiden name, Courtney, and hyphenate it with Knight.

“You would think that would be one of your options,” she said.

It was more complicated than just filling out some forms, however, since she had officially changed her name to Lane when she married the first time and did not change it back to Courtney during the divorce. It required several more forms and additional legwork to first drop Lane and go back to Courtney and then submit the forms to add Knight to her official name. She didn’t remember being frustrated doing her first name change and took it in stride the second time.

“I think I looked at it as a government hassle more than anything. In your 50s, you’re used to that,” she said. “If I had kept the maiden name, then it would not have been an issue.”

• Yours, mine and ours Money can be a stressor in a marriage, so it should be discussed before marrying, they said.

“That’s one of the things you learn when you’re older: how you manage money. We seem to have the same beliefs about what to spend on, what to give,” Becky said.

The Knights have a prenuptial agreement and keep separate accounts with their own retirement investment income coming in, but over time, the lines between their accounts have gotten blurry, Norman said.

The advantage of staying somewhat separated is that each person feels free to spend his or her money as desired, within reason.

• A place for our stuff A second marriage also means each person likely has a fully furnished home.

“You wind up with two of everything. You wouldn’t believe how many pots and pans we have,” Norman said.

Their house is large, so they had room to store extra stuff and have gradually been giving things away. The only disagreement while paring down the furnishings was over art. Norman likes modern and Becky likes traditional, but they compromised and found spots for both artistic schools.

“At my age, I don’t need to be fighting about stuff,” Norman said.

is you must realize that this person comes with a past. The people

“From the very beginning, we didn’t make our pasts something

Where have you been all my life?

and experiences from our pasts are what make us who we are right

that we couldn’t discuss. This is another difference, it seems to me,

Norman said it’s important to acknowledge and accept your spouse-to-be’s past.

“One important part of developing a relationship at an older age

now. It is best to accept this from the person with whom you are

between getting married at a young age when you don’t have much

involved. As a matter of fact, it will cause problems if you can’t or

of a backstory, and getting together later in life.”

won’t,” he said.

And the past doesn’t always remain in the past. Becky said her

southside boomers I winter 2015

COVER STORY

friends ask her if it bothers her that many of Lesley’s things, including her collection of Longaberger baskets, are now in their home. Becky said she’s never been very interested in home décor or craft objects, but she realized the baskets are beautiful and enjoys them – something she never would have experienced if not for Norman’s first wife.

Norman writes a weekly column for the Daily Journal and mentions Lesley occasionally. One column even discussed the Beatles and how they were always part of his life, from meeting Lesley, to helping him through her death and to meeting Becky and discovering their mutual love for the band.

And Becky’s ex-husband is a peripheral part of their lives as the father of her daughters.

Date within your peer group People decide to pair with someone for a variety of reasons, but the Knights say compatibility and shared interests are the best reasons.

“One of the things we realized early on is that we work well together,” Becky said. “A lot of people, you can’t do that with.”

Many middle-age men want someone significantly younger, but Norman said that never appealed to him. He and Becky both remember Vietnam and the music from

the 1960s and are now enjoying retirement together. That generational commonality is important, he said.

“I want to be with somebody who has a joint history.

We both remember the Beatles,” Becky added.

They admit they don’t have everything in common.

Their first marriages were quite different. Norman’s was happy, so he looked at a second marriage more positively than Becky did.

“When you have a good experience, you want to share that with somebody,” he said.

They also do not agree politically. “My goal in life is to get him to at least listen to the other side,” Becky said.

The key to dealing with politics, they agree, is to not take it too seriously.

Know what you want out of life Becky advises that newly single boomers give themselves some time before pursuing another relationship. She recommends a book, “The Five Love Languages” by Gary Chapman, that helped her understand what she needs out of a relationship and what she has to offer a partner.

Boomer women, she said, have seen a lot of changes in the world since their early 20s. There are opportunities for today’s women that weren’t open to boomer women in their youth. Many of them married young and started families.

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southside boomers I winter 2015

COVER STORY

The property features, from left, a décor fence hides utilities, some cut wood waits to be burned in the fireplace and a garden shed that holds long-handled tools for gardening.

“The era has changed. In college, I didn’t know who I was. I didn’t know what drove me,” she said. “It’s hard to pick somebody for the right reasons when you’re that young.”

So, she said, take some time to think about what you want and also what you don’t want. For Becky, she knew she did not want to be with a man who spent all his free time watching sports. Norman, she said, enjoys theater and music.

“He loves to learn new things. He’s always reading,” she said.

Religious faith and church attendance are also important to her. But most important, she said, is taking the time to soul search and self-discover before you consider a new partner.

“There’s comfort in knowing you can be on your own. You don’t need this person. You choose to be with this person because they add dimension to your life.”

Norman added that you should respect the grieving process. “You need to give yourself time to grieve, whether it’s the loss of a spouse or the loss of the marriage.”

Family matters

His advice is to accept and enjoy the new family members you gain in a second marriage.

“You have to know your spouse’s kids are part of their life,” he said.

Becky added that it goes for new in-laws too. She was happy to find

Becky’s daughters were pleased with her marriage to Norman.

“I remember Rachel, my younger one, saying, ‘You’re happier with Norman,’” Becky said. “It is easier that he doesn’t have kids, so we don’t have to do that splitting of time.”

Norman believes Becky’s daughters think of him as part of the family, and he loves being a grandpa to Amanda’s kids. He admits he was a little baffled by how much Becky and Rachel, who is not married, talk on the phone. Much of the dynamics of mother-daughter relationships is foreign to him.

acceptance among Norman’s family.

“His family was very welcoming. He was middle-age single through no fault of his own, so they were happy for him to find someone,” she said.

Becky maintains a relationship with her stepfather, and now Norman is part of that group. She chose her church, which Norman also now attends, because it was equidistant from her late mother’s home in Jackson County. Church events also mean time to spend with her stepfather. Her parents, Becky said, were an excellent example of how to have a happy second marriage.

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southside boomers I winter 2015

COMMENTARY

T

9

SHARON RANDALL It’s a sorry business to hold on to blame

hings happen for a reason. Sometimes it’s your fault. Other times, it’s mine.

OK, usually, it’s mine. But often, the real reason is no reason at all.

As a child, whenever I broke something — a dish, a rule, or maybe my brother’s leg — I would instantly yell, “Accident! Accident! I’m sorry!”

It was my only hope to assert my innocence and avoid bodily harm or maybe death.

It never worked. In my mother’s world, nothing was accidental. She blamed me, my brothers, our stepfather, her mother or God and all His angels.

But she never blamed herself. At least not outwardly.

Inwardly, she always had a knock-down, dragout fight going on, so guilt must have thrown a few punches. I’ll never know for sure. Mothers

and daughters spend a lifetime trying to figure each other out. In the end, we just roll our eyes and say, oh, well, I love you.

If she ever suffered guilt, my mother, God bless her, never seemed to find the grace to say the

your way. If you’re late picking me up and leave me stranded in the rain? I’ll say it’s not your fault, I should’ve taken a cab and an umbrella. If you confess you’re having an affair with your best friend’s husband? I’ll insist I’ve done something just as bad

I’ve got no one to blame for it but myself.

It’s nobody’s fault but my own. magic words, “I am sorry.”

She felt them, I’m certain, but just didn’t say them. So I learned to say them for her.

I’ve been sorry all my life. It may sound a bit unhinged, but there it is. I’ve got no one to blame for it but myself. It’s nobody’s fault but my own.

If you step on my toe? I’ll say I’m sorry I got in

(not like that, of course, but sin, after all, is sin) and resist the urge to ask if I’m your best friend.

No matter how sorry you say you are, I will be sorrier.

When we own up to our misdeeds (not to mention those of everyone else on the planet) several things happen.

First, it ends the senseless argument of who’s to blame.

Two, it takes some of the sting out of the one who’s been stung. Not all of it, maybe, but some.

Finally, best of all, it opens the door to grace.

Forgiveness blooms in the heart of the one who’s wronged, but it’s planted by the one who says, “I’m sorry.”

My children taught me a lot about forgiveness.

No matter what mistakes I made, whatever needless pain I caused, if I said that I was sorry and asked them to forgive me, they did. I’m still learning things from them, and from their children.

One thing they’re teaching me is this: Everything

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southside boomers I winter 2015

MUSIC

WH A C OM

D UN O D UN

S E AR O G T S A RO E

“You’re looking at a period of 10 years in which sales haven’t fallen off. On the other hand, downloads have gone down a little because of the ability to stream music.”

Danny Lindsey

Vinyl records still have a place on the turntable and in collectors’ hearts

E

STORY BY GREG SEITER PHOTOS BY DON MEYER

very once in a while a trend comes along that has so much impact, it never truly fades away, even after seemingly being replaced by something that is believed to be superior in quality.

As far as music listening is concerned, vinyl records fit into that category. In fact, whether it is baby boomers longing to relive their teenage years or younger generations searching for new ways to listen to and enjoy music, vinyl record popularity is once again on the rise.

“I know over the last four or five years, vinyl and to a certain extent, cassettes have been the only mediums increasing in sales,” said Danny Lindsey, owner of Vinyl Rescue Project on State Road 135 in Greenwood. “They really started to grow in popularity in 2005 or 2006, so now you’re looking at a period of 10 years in which sales haven’t fallen off. On the other hand, downloads have gone down a little because of the ability to stream music.”

According to the 2014 Nielsen Music U.S. Report, vinyl record sales increased 52 percent from 2013 to 2014, and 2013’s sales were 33 percent higher than in 2012. Lindsey believes even the number of new music albums being released on vinyl is on the rise.

“When I first opened this store, there were maybe 25 to 30 new releases each week, but now virtually everything that comes out new also comes out on vinyl.”

From compact cassettes and 8-track loop cartridges to digital compact discs, digital downloads and audio streaming, the means by

which music enthusiasts choose to enjoy their tunes has changed dramatically in the last 50 years. So with technology eliminating the need for physical storage devices beyond a computer, iPhone or other yet-to-be-invented mobile device, why are so many reverting to a trend that started to fade in the 1980s?

For some, the revival has to do with an appreciation for imperfect, undoctored audio.

“I know when CDs first came out, they were

Danny Lindsey checks out a vinyl record album at his Vinyl Rescue Project store in Greenwood. Lindsey has seen a rise in the popularity of the music format in the past decade. Opposite page: Two turntables at Lindsey’s store.

southside boomers I winter 2015

MUSIC supposed to sound better, but to me, they were too crisp. Something was lacking. It’s hard to explain,” Lindsey said. “Even with the older stuff, such as blues from the ’50s and ’60s, the background noise is part of the experience. I just think vinyl has a warmer sound.”

Johnson County resident Mark Dippel, a vinyl enthusiast with approximately 800 records in his collection, agrees. “With vinyl, there’s more separation of sound and more definition,” he said.

Dippel, a music writer, is also a big believer in the positives associated with physical media.

“I have no interest in converting to the whole download thing. I just can’t get behind the digital craze at all,” he said. “I like to flip through albums, read what’s on them and even unwrap the shrink wrap. I’m even more of a fan of CDs than I am of digital music because at least with them, you have something to unwrap and hold on to.”

Bargersville area resident Andy Combs feels the same way about his collection of 400 to 500 vinyl records. “I like the hands-on experience you have with an album, and I have an appreciation for the cover art, too,” he said. “In fact, I have probably

20 record sleeves hanging on my walls at home.”

According to Combs, vinyl records may even

aren’t any scratches and then carefully lay the needle down.”

create a stronger sense of pride in ownership than

Dippel and Combs frequently visit Vinyl

other mediums do because of the care they

Rescue Project, sometimes in search of a specific

require. “You can’t just throw them around,” he

item for their collections but mostly just to

said. “You have to carefully take them out of their

browse.

sleeve, gently dust them off and make sure there

Lindsey invested his own collection, approxi-

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mately 8,000 records he obtained over nearly 50 years, into the store when he opened it a little more than two years ago. Now, aside from a massive offering of LPs and 45s, Vinyl Rescue Project also sells a limited supply of mostly used CDs and a variety of turntables and audio accessories, including record cloths and sleeves.

“I worked for the post office for several years and also spent time working for General Motors,” he said. “Some family members thought I had lost my mind when I opened this shop, but I feel like this is what I should have been doing all along.”

From rock to jazz to country, music aficionados of all ages are, in many cases, thumbing their collective noses at modern technology while rediscovering and reinvesting in the natural sounds associated with vinyl records, and Lindsey believes the trend will continue to gain momentum.

“My own personal belief is that vinyl will never be what it once was, but I do think it will eventually represent 10 to 15 percent of the market,” he said. “I think in the near future, when people want a hard copy, they’ll want vinyl. That’s one of the reasons why I don’t stock a lot of CDs. I just can’t sell them.” B

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southside boomers I winter 2015

VOLUNTEERING

May I help you?

STORY BY JENN WILLHITE PHOTOS BY DON MEYER

Volunteers find good reasons to be in the hospital

W

hen Tom Gilmore retired from his career as an engineering manager at Inland Container Corp. six years ago, he needed something to do. The 73-year-old discovered that volunteering at Johnson Memorial Hospital was exactly what he was looking for.

“It is personally very rewarding to be able to contribute to an environment where you are needed. And the self-satisfaction is out-of-sight,” he said.

Gilmore averages eight hours a week at the information desk and said his is the first face people see when they come in. The Franklin resident understands the stress many people are under when they arrive and said it is essential to always have a welcoming attitude.

“When you come to a hospital, there are only a couple reasons to come,” he said. “Either you are going to be a patient or you are coming to see a patient. People who come in are sometimes studying the floor, and you can tell they’re down. So I try to be very cheerful, greet everybody and let

them know there are friendly people here who can help them.”

Gilmore is just one of more than 100 volunteers who work a combined average of 1,400 hours a month, said Gina

The demographic of those who volunteer is as diverse as the volunteer positions available. Typically, volunteers range from 60 to 75 years old, but there are many high school and college students who also offer their time and talents, Huff

“It is personally very rewarding to be able to contribute to an environment where you are needed. And the self-satisfaction is out-of-sight.”

Tom Gilmore Johnson Memorial Hospital volunteer Huff, volunteer coordinator for the hospital. She describes the volunteers as an integral support system for the hospital, especially on the front lines for customer service, who are highly valued and appreciated.

“They streamline it in such a way that it makes it easier for the people who are in clinical positions to do their jobs,” she said. “So, in that sense, we take some of the burden off the clinical staff.”

said. Volunteer positions generally range from working on the information desk, registration/reception areas and gift shop to the emergency room and surgery waiting areas. The time commitment is generally four hours per week for six months, she said.

During the interview process, potential volunteers are screened, including reference and background checks, and then placed in jobs that fit their experience and interests.

VOLUNTEERING

southside boomers I winter 2015

13

Once they’re accepted, volunteers undergo a full day’s orientation and training to familiarize them with patient confidentiality and safety protocols, Huff said.

“Because they are working for the hospital, they have similar orientation to an employee,” she said.

“The government regulation requires quite a bit of orientation and paperwork.”

For the majority of volunteers, personal experience inspires them to donate their time. “Many will come, especially if they’ve been recently widowed or cared for a loved one in the last stages of illness,” Huff said. “They know what it is like to be caring for someone who is very ill, so they appreciate and want to give back to the doctors, nurses and community who have helped them.”

Such is the case with Bill Frosch. The Franklin resident began volunteering in the surgery waiting area 10 years ago after his wife died.

“One day I didn’t have anything to do,” he said.

“I was riding my bicycle by the hospital, and I thought, ‘I need to do some volunteer work.’”

Coincidentally, when he was placed in the surleft: Tom Gilmore mans the information desk at Johnson Memorial Hospital. Above right: Ed McCarty transports Anne Toole gery department, he found he was taking over for Above through the hospital. Opposite page: Pam Sherrill volunteers in the gift shop. The Franklin hospital’s volunteer program consists of more a woman who had helped take care of his wife than 100 volunteers who work a combined average of 1,400 hours a month.

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southside boomers I winter 2015

before she died. The 73-year-old describes the experience as a “passing of the baton” and said it was a way to give back.

Frosch, who drives the shuttle bus and takes care of the aviary in the surgery waiting area, said volunteering is something that makes you feel good about yourself. Not only are you helping those who need it, but you are also appreciated for the assistance you offer. He describes himself as one who has always needed something to do and said prior to volunteering he didn’t feel like he was doing anything for anyone.

“I didn’t feel like I had accomplished anything for the day,” he said. “I had to do something to keep busy. As a volunteer, I feel good about myself, and that’s what I like.”

Huff said many retirees who volunteer are in the same situation as Frosch. “Initially when people retire, the thought of working is repugnant,” she said. “They’re saying they just want to play golf for the rest of their life and don’t want to answer to anyone. But after a year of that, people get tired and want to go somewhere to make a difference.”

Not only do volunteers get much-needed social interaction, but there are health benefits as well, she said. Making a difference is crucial for anyone, SEE VOLUNTEERS, PAGE 23

VOLUNTEERING

Shuttle driver Bill Frosch offers rides to and from vehicles.

southside boomers I winter 2015

HEALTH

10 healthy holiday nutrition What Matters Most to You tips to tame temptation is What Matters Most to Us. Mayo Clinic News Network

H

olidays are usually enjoyable.

However, unhealthy habits can be attached to the parties and gatherings. Here are 10 tips from Allie Wergin, registered dietitian nutritionist at Mayo Clinic Health System, to help you have a healthier holiday:

Don’t skip meals Skipping a meal with the goal of saving calories prior to a holiday event can often backfire and lead to overeating due to ravenous feelings of hunger. Having a filling snack, such as fruit, string cheese, yogurt or a small handful of nuts, can help to curb your appetite and prevent overeating.

Contribute a healthy dish Ensure at least one nutritious choice is available at potlucks by contributing a healthy dish.

Think color Make a plate look festive by including fruits and veggies. Aim to cover half the plate.

Choose drinks wisely Stick to calorie-free drinks, such as water, tea or seltzer, instead of high-calorie festive drinks.

Alcoholic beverages contribute empty calories and can cause you to make poor judgments with food. If you do choose to drink alcohol,

do so in moderation, and alternate each alcoholic drink with a glass of water.

Choose your splurges Scan the buffet or dinner table and choose a couple holiday favorites to splurge on instead of foods that you can have any other day of the year.

Visit the people, not the food Move socializing away from the buffet or appetizer table to prevent mindless eating.

Say no to food pushers You can do this politely, we’re confident.

Savor seasonal treats Having treats once a year will not make or break your weight. Make sure you take time to really taste and enjoy that special treat when you have it.

Eat until you are satisfied, not stuffed No one likes that icky, stuffed feeling after a meal. Eat slowly, and check your fullness levels while you’re eating. Remember — there are always leftovers!

Don’t feel guilty If you did overindulge, don’t beat yourself up. Just make sure your next meal is healthy, and be sure to incorporate exercise into your routine. B

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COLLECTIBLES

Turning your baseball card collection into cash

By STEVE ROSEN The Kansas City Star

I

’ve always vowed to never sell my baseball card collection unless I was absolutely broke and down to my last can of beans.

And every year my resolve to hold onto my childhood hobby gets weaker and weaker.

The thousands of cards I collected for fun as a kid mostly collect dust these days.

A few times I’ve asked my three millennial kids if they had any interest in inheriting my collection sooner rather than later. I’ve even considered adding a line to the will to force the issue, with a provision for three-way trades to divvy up players and teams. But do I want them to inherit the responsibility of selling the collection? Not really.

Besides, never have I heard them say, “Dad, I’ve always wanted your 1962 Pumpsie Green and Choo Choo Coleman cards,” or “It’s such an honor to be the guardian of your 1964 Mickey Mantle and Roger Maris cards.”

Which brings me back to edging toward simply selling my cards, pocketing the cash for my rainy day fund and moving on.

That, in fact, is what a friend recently decided to do.

After researching the market, he attended a baseball card show and arranged a sale to a dealer. He got a satisfactory price, there were no games involved, and the whole process was over in a couple hours.

Here’s the kicker: He used the money to pay college tuition bills for one of his kids. Not a bad way to put his hobby to use.

If you’re like me and haven’t sold any cards since your playground days, you may need to bone up on your options. Do you want to try your luck on eBay, any of the auction houses that advertise online, mega card shows that come to town, retail card shops or private transactions?

Are you looking to sell by teams or by favorite player? Have you considered dealing with an auction house that will sell

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southside boomers I winter 2015

COLLECTIBLES your stacks on consignment?

Given all these options, the selling process can be daunting. And failing to do some research can shave more than just pennies per card off your profit.

Though prices peaked in the 1990s, the hottest part of the market these days appears to cards from the 1950s, and 1960s, said Michael Steele, a former sports card auction

Before selling your cards, get at least a general value on your collection. Websites such as Beckett Media, at www. beckett.com, provide reliable information on pricing and rarity and also offer a grading service for a fee that could further determine whether a card has real value based on condition and other factors.

What if you get a low-ball offer? Don’t be in a rush, said

“High-end and even mid-grade rookie cards of Hall of Famers from that era (1950s and 1960s) such as Hank Aaron, Roberto Clemente and Ernie Banks are on fire.”

Michael Steele, former sports card auction house owner house owner who has more than 30 years’ experience in buying and selling cards.

“High-end and even mid-grade rookie cards of Hall of Famers from that era such as Hank Aaron, Roberto Clemente and Ernie Banks are on fire,” Steele said. “And Mickey Mantle cards are insane, price-wise, right now.”

As evidence, a 1956 Mantle card in excellent condition and printed by the Topps card company sold for $3,500 in August 2014. That same card fetched $5,500 this past August, Steele said.

Steele, and shop around. Don’t take your cards to a single dealer if at all possible.

Even if you don’t have a 1956 Mantle or a 1954 Aaron, don’t resort to tossing your collection in the trash. You just might have enough gems to cover a semester or two of your kids’ college education. How many childhood hobbies can produce those results? B Steve Rosen is assistant business editor at The Kansas City Star. To reach him, call 816-234-4879 or send email to srosen@kcstar.com.

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southside boomers I winter 2015

TRAVEL

SERENITY NOW The mysterious holloways of Dorset, England STORY BY JERRY HARMER ASSOCIATED PRESS PHOTOS

D

orset is one of England’s often overlooked gems: rolling countryside, ancient thatched-roof villages, the birthplace of 19th century novelist Thomas Hardy and a sea that breaks on a World Heritage Site coastline.

But if you ask me, the county’s most startling treasure is its least-known: holloways.

Holloways are paths sunk deep below ground level by centuries, perhaps millennia, of passing feet, cartwheels and livestock. Dorset conceals many within its bucolic folds. Long since abandoned as thoroughfares, and overgrown with brambles and bushes, they are often unknown to all but the very local. When I asked the tourist office in the market town of Bridport how to find one, no one there knew what I was talking about.

But I kept looking and asking. Finally, one recent sunny Saturday afternoon, after getting directions from a bearded countryman who pointed up a lane with a stick, my family and I strode northwest out of the village of Symondsbury.

For some way our path was just an ordinary country lane but then the greenery thickened, the path twisted and everything changed.

Parallel walls of soft brown rock suddenly climbed above us forming a narrow gorge 20 feet high in places. It was as if a giant finger had gouged the earth then left it to settle back as it may.

Trees clung to the sides at astonishing angles as if frozen in the act of falling, their roots exposed like giant snakes, their branches intertwined high

southside boomers I winter 2015

TRAVEL

above to form a roof that filtered the sunlight.

We stood stupefied in a green underworld. It was like being in a mythical landscape, utterly detached from reality. It was awe-inspiring and incredibly serene. I was sure the spell would break but nothing moved and no one else came. The only sounds were birdsong and the occasional whoop of delight from my 6-year-old son.

But there was also an ambivalence. As we explored we noticed faces and giant eyes expertly carved into the rock. For all its tranquility in daylight it is probably an unnerving walk at dusk or later. It was then I remembered the name my guide had used for the path: Hell Lane. I kept that information to myself.

Later I looked for the holloway on a satellite map. All that’s there is a line of greenery like any other, among a patch-work of fields; an astonishing slice of England hiding in plain sight. B

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Opposite page: A sunken path, overgrown with greenery, between the villages of Symondsbury and North Chideock, in Dorset, England. The paths are called holloways, and they are abandoned thoroughfares that have sunk deep below the ground after centuries of use. Above left and above: Carvings found in the rocks along the paths.

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southside boomers I winter 2015

COOKING

Simple homemade hot chocolate beats the winter chill

By ROBERT A. CRONKLETON The Kansas City Star (TNS)

G

rowing up, my mother always encouraged her children to cook. So when I found a recipe for hot chocolate on the side of the Hershey’s Cocoa can, it was easy to convince her to let me give it a try.

What I discovered was that hot chocolate doesn’t have to come from an envelope.

This recipe has been a favorite of mine to make on days when winter weather has convinced me to stay home and off the roads. It’s the perfect way to kill time and have a nice hot drink to warm you on those chilly days.

Although you can top it with whipped cream, I prefer marshmallows.

FAVORITE HOT COCOA Makes 4 to 6 servings 1/2 cup sugar 1/4 cup unsweetened cocoa powder Dash of salt 1/3 cup hot water 4 cups milk 3/4 teaspoon vanilla extract Whipped cream or marshmallows (optional) Mix sugar, cocoa powder, salt and water in a sauce pan.

Stir constantly over medium heat until mixture comes to a boil (about 2 minutes.) Stir in milk and heat. Bring the hot chocolate to the desired temperature but do not boil. Remove from heat and add the vanilla extract. Divide into mugs and top with whipped cream or marshmallows.

PERFECTLY CHOCOLATE HOT COCOA Makes 1 serving 2 tablespoons sugar 2 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder Dash salt 1 cup milk 1/4 teaspoon vanilla extract Whipped cream or marshmallows (optional) Mix sugar, cocoa powder and salt into large mug. In separate microwave-safe container, heat on high for 1 to 1 ½ minutes or until very hot. Carefully and gradually add milk to dry mixture. Stir well. Add vanilla extract. Top with whipped cream or marshmallows.

Source: hersheyskitchens.com

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southside boomers I winter 2015

BOOKS

GIFTS

for the

By Jeremy Mikula Chicago Tribune

Gifting a book to a book lover for the holidays is kind of like giving your dad a tie for Father’s Day. Here are some nonbook gifts to wrap for the book lover in your life this holiday season.

BOOK LOVER

From a distance, this depiction of the moment Alice falls down the rabbit hole looks like pointillism. But take a closer look to see that instead of dots creating a larger image, it is the text from Lewis Carroll’s 150-year-old novel, “Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland.” ($24, www.lithographs.com).

For those who float between the digital and print worlds, these handmade tablet covers utilize a similar technique to how hardback books are made. Choose based on device’s screen size. ($37.72 and up, klevercase)

Handmade, solid wood blocks pay tribute to some of history’s greatest authors.

Seen here is the Edgar Allan Poe block. ($9 each). From Literature Lodge

This solid beechwood (and cleverly named) cutting board from Fred & Friends is shaped like a book and features a cutting area of 9.5 by 6.09 inches. ($16, www.fredandfriends.com)

This bracelet contains cut-out portions of Harper Lee’s novel, “To Kill a Mockingbird. Available in three finishes on etsy.com. ($37.95-$39.95)

Magnetic finger puppets of famous authors from The Unemployed Philosophers Guild. Choose from Shakespeare, Twain, Austen, Orwell, Plath, Whitman, Dickinson and more. ($6.95 each, four for $23.80) Typing “books” into the search bar at Redbubble garners a plethora of bookish results. If you’ve got an eclectic collection of books, this “Bookworm” iPhone case fits the bill. Available for iPhones 4 through 6s Plus. ($24.16)

Kurt Vonnegut’s satirical novel “Slaughterhouse-Five” features the phrase “so it goes” more than 100 times. This Out of Print necklace honors that line. ($30)

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DO IT YOURSELF

Build a centerpiece for your holiday table for $10

By JAMIE KNODEL The Dallas Morning News (TNS)

F

from pinwheels to photos to create custom arrangements.

Forgoing a traditional vessel for flowers, Cowsert instead used a portion of a downed tree branch.

She added a few nails into the wood to help keep the flowers in place.

From there, she broke up a budget grocery store bouquet and placed the flowers on top, filling in with dried moss. She added a single hydrangea in the center for drama. Eucalyptus was also scattered around the base of the log, and Cowsert draped pieces from a deconstructed grapevine wreath atop the arrangement for additional texture.

This look, she says, can be easily replicated to make a major impression. “I had in mind doing not one amazing showstopper, but one that can be re-created on multiple tables,” she says.

or the holiday host, there’s no shortage of things to spend on: the meal, drinks, decor, gifts. Dressing a table doesn’t have to blow the budget, too.

Showcasing items from your home — and backyard — allows for a creative, budget-friendly centerpiece. Embellishing grocery store bouquets with a few simple touches elevates them from standard to spectacular.

We challenged Dallas stylemakers Ashley Brown and Monica Cowsert to use items they already had — along with a $10 budget — to design something that would give guests something to talk about besides the bird of honor.

As a blogger who writes about ways to incorporate antiques and family pieces into the everyday, Ashley Brown is always looking for Pattern play ways to showcase heirlooms.

Not afraid of pattern or color?

Brown put a dainty Royal Then add even more of it to your Doulton figurine in a place of tabletop. honor on her table. The 100-yearCowsert is crazy for old collectible of a woman carrying Schumacher’s Chiang Mai Dragon flowers watches over guests atop a pattern. She took a wallpaper scrap stack of cake pedestals. To give her from her powder bath project and even more prominence, Brown set made a color copy and had it lamithe item, which once belonged to nated. From there, a centerpiece her great-grandmother, on a bed of was a just a few pieces of invisible floral moss inside a hurricane glass. tape away.

The glass serving pieces were also A finished centerpiece by designer Ashley Brown. She was challenged to make a centerShe taped the copy into a cylinder dressed with moss and a selection piece for $10 or less./THE DALLAS MORNING NEWS PHOTO shape that would conceal a vase filled of citrus fruits in a variety of sizes with fresh flowers and greenery. and colors. Brown also made sure rine on the corner of the books. base for a wired and domed bird cage.

Cowsert cut apart a wreath and used to layer space under the pedestal with The biggest expense for this centerShe filled the metal accessory with those grapevine pieces throughout the texture. piece? The lights. The rest of the items, shredded basket and gift-wrap filler. A arrangement, encircling the base to bulk Pepperberries were snipped into small Brown already owned. strand of battery-powered fairy lights up the centerpiece. bundles and tucked among the fruit and illuminates the paper globe Brown used Go out on a limb “One thing I like to do is make somemoss to add more dimension. as the focal point.

When you’re in the wedding and thing that can be used in another way,” One key to a successful centerpiece is For more interest, glittered pine events business, you see a lot of centerCowsert says. “When you untape the vase, getting the height right. A simple solucones, fresh greenery and berries were pieces, says Monica Cowsert. you can use the copy as a place mat.” tion is using books, and if they’re nestled around the cage.

Cowsert, who owns the Bird’s Nest in You can also use a potted plant rather antique and in the right color scheme, Playing off the bird atop the cage, Melissa, says she has been inspired by than a bouquet to fill the vase, and you even better.

Brown perched a small silver bird figuBrown used a stack of books as the creative brides who have used everything can plant it once the party’s over. B

southside boomers I winter 2015

23

Volunteers FROM PAGE 14 and it has been proven that those who volunteer live longer and are healthier, she said.

To those who are considering volunteering, Frosch said don’t stress. If you are unsure about what job you want to do, someone is going to help you find the best fit, he said. “Not every job is busy from the time you walk in,” he said. “And if you don’t keep busy the whole time, it isn’t a big deal.”

For information about volunteering, visit www.johnsonmemorial.org or call Gina Huff at 317-346-3760. B

Randall

Gina Huff, volunteer coordinator for Johnson Memorial Hospital.

time casting blame for things that are no one’s fault, while we long to forgive and be forgiven.

FROM PAGE 9 is not my fault. Some things, yes, but not all.

Recently, I lost my cell phone. I spent all day searching for it, ripping apart my purse, my car, my house, my hair. No sign of it anywhere. Soon the beating began. How could I be so careless, so feeble-minded, so dumb? Finally, I called my husband at work.

“I lost my phone,” I said, “and I feel like such an idiot.”

“I’ll call it,” he said. Then he laughed. “Oh, wait. I’ve got it.

Guess I, uh, picked it up by mistake this morning.”

For a moment, I had visions of smothering him in his sleep.

But he was sorry, sort of. So I forgave him. It wasn’t his fault.

And for once, it wasn’t mine.

I told you all that to say this: Life is short. We waste precious

If you need to say you’re sorry, say it quick. If you need to forgive, do it now. Don’t beat yourself up, or anyone, for things that can’t be helped.

Let go of old hurts. Don’t let them keep hurting you.

The ancient poet Rumi said, “The wound is the place where the Light enters you.”

Keep the scar, welcome the Light, but lose the pain.

If you need someone to blame? Blame me.

I promise I’ll be sorry.

B

Sharon Randall can be reached at P.O. Box 777394, Henderson NV 89077, or on her website: www.sharonrandall.com

Tanya FROM PAGE 3 alive; after his death, it seemed impossible.

“I left everything to him,” Tucker says. “I did the creative part and he did the management. I didn’t have to worry about my money, I didn’t have to worry about anything. My dad had me covered. Now I’m finding out a lot more about the business than I ever knew. It’s just a learning process.”

Tucker is working on an album of new material, and the tour has exceeded expectations. Yet she occupies a strange cultural space: Despite four decades of hitmaking, she may be best known as Campbell’s grieving ex in exile.

“It was a love that will never be again,” says Tucker. “That was it for me.

I’ve never been married or anything, I guess because I always did love him, and that’s never gonna change.” B

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