September/October 2012 Issue

setapartgirl

LESLIE LUDY’S

MAGAZINE

Captivating Selflessness

cultivating an outward-focused life p. 10

True Beauty

from a warrior-poet’s perspective p. 30

Tensile Strength Training letting your children make you strong p. 94

A SET-APART

Wedding Day

The Haiti Letters

more stories from the mission field p. 108

a glimpse inside two beautiful love stories p. 46

SEPT/OCT 2012

letter from leslie ludy BESTSELLING AUTHOR FOUNDER, setapartgirl

Whenever fall comes around, the world’s messages of “get what you want out of life” and “go for your dreams” seem to get even louder.

It is so easy to jump on the “it’s all about me” bandwagon; whether it’s chasing after a romantic relationship, pursuing the ideal career, chasing after new forms of pleasure and entertainment, or building the perfect wardrobe. Even in my own life as a wife, mother, and ministry leader, the bait is always there to seek comfort and security rather than a sacrificial, poured-out life for Jesus Christ that holds nothing back. It takes supernatural grace to rise above these temptations, die daily, and give everything to Him without reserve – we must give up temporal pursuits and live in light of eternity.

Earlier this year we heard about two abandoned babies from Haiti who were in need of a family. We were presented with the opportunity to adopt them. Just as I was starting to get used to life with four young children; just as my toddlers were about to be potty trained and out of diapers; just as family life was starting to become a bit more comfortable and predictable – God pointed out two more precious little lives in need of sacrificial love. Giving up personal comforts in order to serve, give, and showcase the love of Christ is the very essence of what He did for us on the Cross. Those of us who choose this life may not experience the temporary pleasures of worldly, self-focused living, but what infinitely greater rewards we receive when our lives are fully surrendered to Him! May this magazine issue inspire you once again to take up your cross and follow Him! (Oh, if you want more details about the two little ones we are soon to adopt, see page 108.)

Leslie

letter from the setapartgirl team Amy, Mandy, Lauren, & Tessa Change seems to always accompany the crisp fall weather, and it certainly has been a season of new beginnings for our team. The celebration of Nick and Tessa’s marriage last month brought us all great joy and delight in what our God has done in their lives, but with it has also come a beautiful God-scripted newness. While we know that our time together as a team will never be the same again, we look forward with great expectation to all that God will do in the coming weeks and months.

Though all change is an adjustment, whether it be starting a new job, heading back to school, settling in to a new routine after the summer, or even just adapting to the dropping temperatures, if our feet are firmly planted upon the Rock, He will sustain us and grow us through whatever is His perfect will for us. As the psalmist says, “God is our refuge and strength, A very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth should change And though the mountains slip into the heart of the sea; the LORD of hosts is with us; The God of Jacob is our stronghold” (Psalm 46:1-2,7 NASB). Our God is unchanging, a firm and steadfast foundation, a secure fortress in whom we can find refuge when the winds and waves of change and the unknown surround us on every side. His plans are good and His promises are sure. And when we choose to walk forward in the path He has put before us, no matter how narrow, how difficult, or how seemingly impossible, we will find all we need for life and godliness (see 2 Peter 1:3).

As we are navigating this season of change, each of us has a great anticipation for how our God will lead, sustain, grow, keep, and bless us through it. His ways truly are higher than our ways, and we rejoice in all He has done and all He has yet to do – for HIS glory! We pray that the truths found within this new issue will draw you afresh into the everlasting arms of our faithful Father, and lift your eyes to the unchanging realities of heaven.

amy, mandy, lauren, & tessa

inthisissue set apart femininity

Explore God’s Sacred Intent for Your Life

10 l The Beauty of Selflessness 20 l Stories of Significance: The setapartgirl Team Shares Their Favorite Quotes

set apart relationships

Honoring God in Love and Romance

30 l Imperishable Beauty: From a Warrior-Poet’s Perspective 36 l The Peril of Presumption: A Love Story without Impatience and Confusion

set apart walk

Cultivate Your Daily Romance with Christ

set apart style

Showcasing the Radiance of Christ

60 l Again, Please: Developing an Insatiable Hunger for God’s Word

68 l The Art of Sacred Living

set apart motherhood

Discover God’s Heart for Home and Family

94 l Tensile Strength Training 102 l Kiddo Spot

issue bonus

108 | Annie’s Letters from Haiti

Unless otherwise noted, all Scripture is taken from the New King James Version.

Copyright 2012 The Church at Ellerslie.

All rights reserved.

No material from this issue may be copied, reproduced, or distributed without express written permission from The Church at Ellerslie.

94

46

60 10 108

30

36 ineveryissue 9

setapartgirl playlist

35

Leslie’s Blog

46

Photo Spread

80

Sister of the Common Life

90

Q & A with Leslie

106

Staff Book Recommendations

setapartgirl quote “...only out of intimacy with our heavenly Lover can the beauty of a God-written human love story be experienced.�

-leslie ludy

about leslie

Leslie Ludy

FOUNDER, setapartgirl

Leslie Ludy is a bestselling author and speaker with a passion for reaching her generation with the hope of Christ. She and her husband Eric have been writing and speaking together for the past seventeen years. Widely known for their bestselling classic, When God Writes Your Love Story, Eric and Leslie have become foremost voices on some of the most poignant issues facing the Church today, such as relationships, purity, holiness, and living a fully consecrated life for Christ. Together, they are the authors of eighteen books that have been translated into over a dozen languages around the world. For more about Leslie’s books, click here. Leslie and Eric are the founders and directors of Ellerslie Leadership Training based in Windsor, Colorado - an intensive discipleship training program that prepares future leaders for wold-impacting Christian service, and draws men and women of all ages from around the world.

contributor

Grace McConnaughey

Designer/Photographer | Colorado

Grace has been a part of Ellerslie and setapartgirl for quite some time, faithfully serving in many different ways. Her passion for and delight in Jesus Christ shine through in every task Grace takes on, and she does everything “heartily as unto the Lord and not unto men.” God has gifted Grace with an eye for beauty, a unique style, and an amazing talent for photography and design.

Over the past few months, and especially since Annie’s departure to Haiti, Grace has come alongside of our team and offered up these gifts and talents to be used for the Lord’s glory in this Sep/ Oct issue.

stay connected with us through facebook & our mailing list Follow us on Facebook! And share setapartgirl with your friends!

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setapartgirl

PLAYLIST

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“setapartgirl playlist”

Leslie’s PICK: Still My Soul, Be Still by Keith and Kristyn

TEAM

PICKS:

Getty is such a beautiful meditation on resting in God’s peace and protection, no matter what trials come our way. Each time I listen to it, I am reminded to not be shaken, but remain steadfast in His Truth.

AMELIA: If Not for Christ, by FFH LAUREN: The Unveiling, by Michael Card AMY: How Deep, by Sovereign Grace MANDY: We Hunger and Thirst, by Sovereign Grace MADISON: How Deep the Father’s Love for Us, by Sarah Sadler ANNIE: Who, Chelsea Flack MARLENE: Overcome, by Ross Parsley & the Desperation Band TESSA: Come Thou Fount, by Chris Rice

Selflessness The Beauty of

Cultivating An Outward-Focused Life “Do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others.”

Phil. 2:4 NASB

by Leslie Ludy Sara is a college sophomore who stands out among other young womewn her age.

While other girls spend their weekends at parties or the mall, trying to snag a guy or buy up the latest trends, Sara uses her free time in an entirely different way. Whenever she is not in class or studying, she can be found volunteering at the local nursing home or taking care of needy children in the community. Instead of spending her summer vacation making extra money or going to the beach, Sara spends every

break going to the mission field – working in orphanages around the world and ministering to neglected children. She doesn’t do any of these things in order to make herself seem more spiritual. Rather, she is passionately in love with Jesus Christ, and she cannot help but pour her life out for those in need around her.

When I observe Sara, I notice a radiance, a glow, a loveliness that is unusual in modern young women. It is the beauty

of selflessness. Sara has chosen to deny self, to silence the voice of her own whims and wants, and sacrificially pour out her life for Jesus Christ.

In my book Authentic Beauty, I described a scene I once witnessed in a college hang-out on Friday night: Eric and I were sitting in an artsy little coffee shop, a popular student gathering place not far from a state university. The place was packed to capacity. A local musician was performing, and dozens of

She was sitting at a table near ours, a bright-eyed young woman who looked about twenty-one. To her left was a girl in a wheelchair, who was unable to lift her head, use her limbs, or even speak. The sandy-haired young woman was softly touching the disabled girl on the arm, smiling and talking casually to her about the local musician’s amazing guitar talents.

At first I thought she might be some kind of nurse or aid for the girl in the wheelchair, but soon I realized that she was simply another college student, out on a Friday night with one of her good friends.

She seemed to glow with an inner sparkle... college students were crowded around the little tables, drinking cappuccino, playing cards, chatting, studying, or hooking up.

I sipped my chai and gazed around at the scene. The room was full of flirtatious girls and guys who eyed each other from across the room and then ended up at the same table, engaged in lively, flirtatious conversation. The students were acting like every other college group I had ever been around – until suddenly I noticed her – a sandy-haired young women with a radiant smile on her face.

For the next hour, I stole glances at their table, intrigued by how they communicated back and forth, and especially by how sensitive and caring the sandy-haired young woman was toward her friend. She seemed to glow with an inner sparkle that exuded total peace and confidence. She was completely delighted to be spending the evening with the girl in the wheelchair, even though they made an unusual pair among the rest of the students. She appeared fully content to help her friend with her drink and chat with her about the music, oblivious to the flirting and hooking up going on all around her.

I found out later from Eric, who had chatted with her while he stood in line for a refill, that the two girls were roommates and that the girl in the wheelchair had been severely disabled since birth. The sandyhaired young woman spent much of her spare time helping her roommate with her day-to-day challenges, and the two had become close friends. Eric noticed that the sandy-haired young woman did not seem to want to talk about herself, but she glowed as she went on and on about her roommate’s amazing qualities – things that people often didn’t notice because of the disability. Her sincere and sacrificial love for her friend was obvious.

blissfully unaware of self – and totally caught up in her King’s priorities. It was truly a beautiful sight to behold.

As the night went on, this young woman fascinated me. She seemed to radiate with an unshakable confidence. She could have easily blended in with the dozens of other girls there, but instead, here she was, joyfully pouring herself out to serve her roommate. In fact, she seemed to be having more fun than any other girl in the whole place. As the musician wrapped up his final set, I glanced out the window and saw the sandy-haired young woman whizzing through the parking lot on the back of her friend’s wheelchair, the two of them laughing with childlike delight as they raced past the rows of cars. From all appearances, this young woman had just had the best night of her life.

And Galatians 5:16 commands us, “...Walk in the Spirit and you shall not fulfill the lusts of the flesh.”

Though I never officially met her, I w o u l d venture to guess that this young woman knows Jesus Christ in an intimate way.

Radiance, confidence, and stunning inner beauty sparkled from within her. She was

1 Peter 4:2 tells us that we should no longer live the rest of our time in the flesh “for the lusts of men, but for the will of God.” Romans 8:1 says, “There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit.”

1 Peter 2:11 exhorts, “Beloved, I beg you as sojourners and pilgrims, abstain from fleshly lusts which war against the soul.”

All throughout Scripture, we are told to yield to the voice of God’s Spirit, rather than the voice of our flesh. But to most of us, the term flesh is just an outdated, vague term that we do not really understand.

Here is a vital truth we must recognize in order to live a successful Christian life: flesh is just another word for self – our selfish, put-my-own-wants-first side.

Many of us don’t even realize we have a selfish, fleshly side. We make decisions based on our own whims and desires. We do what makes us feel good. We follow our selfish wants.

It’s easy to live as a slave to our flesh without even realizing it, especialy if we go to church and spend time doing spiritual things.

Our culture, even our Christian culture, has a tendency to encourage us to listen to our fleshly side. Follow your heart! Pay attention to your emotional and physical needs! Don’t just meet everyone else’s needs – take time for YOU! What do you want out of life? How can you fulfill your destiny? All of these questions cause us to focus inward – on what we want, what we need, and who we are.

And yet the Bible makes it clear that if we yield to the flesh, we cannot yield to the Spirit of God. The flesh wars against all the things of God – and it must be silenced in order for us to deny self, take up our cross, and follow our King.

As Ian Thomas so eloquently said, “The Christian life can be explained only in terms of Jesus Christ, and if your life as a Christian can still be explained in terms of you – your personality, your willpower, your gift, your talent, your money, your courage, your scholarship, your dedication, your sacrifice, or your anything – then although you may have the Christian life, you are not yet living it.”

Contrary to what our culture insists, this life is not about us - it’s about Him. And only when we put to silence our selfish side can we radiate with divine heavenly beauty. So how do we learn to yield to the Spirit instead of fulfilling the lusts of the flesh? It starts with simple, everyday decisions.

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...this life is not about us - it’s about Him.

Often, it starts with your morning alarm clock. Do you yield to the beckoning whisper of Christ’s Spirit, asking you to get up and spend time with Him, or listen to your own selfish desire to stay in bed? Our entire day is filled with those kinds of decisions. We can either claim this life as our own, and do what our flesh desires, or we can deny self, take up our cross, and follow Him. The more we yield to His Spirit, the more we are able, by His supernatural grace, to live the set-apart life He has called us to live.

Daily life is filled with hundreds of choices to either give in to selfish whims or yield to Christ’s Spirit. But most of us are so used to obeying the commands of our carnal desires that our ears are deaf to the Spirit of God. Silencing our selfish side takes a lot of focus and a heavy dose of supernatural enabling grace. But Christ is more than interested in equipping us to put to death the desires of our flesh.

When you woke up this morning, did you think of your day as belonging to you, or Him? Did you live as if your time and decisions were your own, or His?

...in light

did for us

can any s

be t

Did you allow the distractions and allurements of this world to turn your head, to occupy your thoughts, or to dictate your choices? Or was He your sole pursuit? How did you spend your free time? Doing what you felt like doing? Or pouring out your life for Him? The choice between selfishness and selflessness affects just about every part of our femininity – from what we wear to how we interact with others. For example, the way we choose to dress and carry ourselves makes a very loud statement about our inner priorities. All too many of us have fallen prey to dressing selfishly and seductively. We want eyes to be on

us. We want guys to notice us. Our goal is not to bring glory to Jesus Christ, but to bring approval and attention to ourselves.

We selfishly lead guys to stumble rather than heroically protecting their inner purity.

The way we act socially also speaks volumes about our inner focus. We are typically so caught up in our own world that we don’t take time to think about what would be the most honoring to those around us. And as a result, we never showcase the captivating beauty of selflessness that God intended us to have.

Look at the example of Jesus – He always saw the needs around Him. He did not put His own needs or wants first.

t of what Christ

on the cross, how

sacrifice for Him

too extreme?

His entire life was one of poured-out servanthood and sacrificial love.

Because of His absolute selflessness, He willingly embraced the greatest suffering this world has ever known. Hebrews tells us that Christ endured the cross, despising the shame. It was not easy and comfortable for Jesus to give up His life.

It was not delightful and pleasant. Taking up His cross caused Him more pain and misery than anyone has ever known or imagined. It was so difficult that the night before it happened He wept exceedingly, sweat drops of blood, and cried out to His Father, “Is there any other way?”

What if Jesus had simply listened to His own selfish wants that night in the

Garden of Gethsemane? What if He had yielded to what His emotions and human desires were telling him? What if He had said, “Surely God does not want me to embrace something that makes me feel so miserable. Surely I should not see this as an opportunity from my Father! Death is a curse, it’s shameful; it’s painful. Why would I surrender to something that does not make me feel happy?”

In our self-focused culture, it is easy to see absolute selflessness as extreme and unnecessary. A lot of us take on the attitude that says, “I will just do the bare minimum so I can stay on God’s good side” – especially when it comes to dressing modestly, living in purity, and caring for the needs of others. But in light of what Christ did for us on the cross, how can any sacrifice for Him be too extreme?

Cultivating selflessness in these areas of our lives is just one small way of reflecting the beauty of our King and expressing our gratitude for what He has done for us.

1 Peter 2:21 reminds us, “For to this you were called, because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that you should follow His steps.”

Ask God to show you any area of your life in which you are inwardfocused rather than outward-focused.

Do you draw attention to yourself in social situations, or do you continually point others to Jesus Christ? Do you flirt with guys and dress seductively, even in subtle ways? Are you moody and sullen when someone irritates you? Repent of any self-

ishness He convicts you of, and then write down specific ways in which you can begin to turn outward, rather than inward, in those areas of your life. You might find it helpful to recruit a trusted accountability partner to help keep you on track as you develop selfless habits in these areas of your life. to help keep you on track as you develop selfless habits in these areas of your life.

Hannah Whitehall Smith wrote, “One of the most effective ways of conquering [selfishness] is to make a rule that, whenever we are tempted to dwell on self, we will at once begin to dwell upon the Lord instead.”

This is wonderful advice. Whenever you are tempted to turn inward, the best thing you can do is fill your mind and heart with thoughts of your

great King, letting all thoughts of self become swallowed up in Him. Most of us have selfish habits that need to be re-made by Christ’s Spirit. I would encourage you to spend some focused time in prayer and waiting on God, allowing Him to gently reveal those areas of your life that need His transforming touch. Allow His Spirit to open your eyes to any part of your daily existence in which you typically yield to your selfish whims and desires. You may find it helpful to write down anything that He brings to mind. Then, pray specifically for the grace to silence your selfish side in each of these areas, and begin putting it into practice in your everyday life. (For example, choosing to joyfully respond when your alarm clock goes off, instead of lazily pushing the snooze button or angrily hurling it across the room.)

It may take a few days, weeks, or months for those old habits to fully die. But if you allow Him to retrain your daily decisions and enable you to deny yourself, pick up your cross, and follow Him you will soon understand from firsthand experience what Paul meant when he said, “it is no longer I who lives, but Christ lives in me” (Gal. 2:20). * .

Allow His Spirit to open your eyes...

take it deeper

Authentic

order now

Beauty

For most of my young adult life, I had known Jesus Christ only as the One who had saved me from my sins. I had been looking to an earthly romance to fulfill the deepest desires of my heart. I had been searching for an earthly prince to rescue me, to carry me away to his castle, to love and cherish me forever – to fulfill my feminine desire for tender romance.

But until Jesus Christ becomes the Lover of our soul - the very center of our existence - we will always be looking in the wrong places to fulfill our feminine longing for tender romance. We will end up broken-hearted and disillusioned, time and time again. Christ alone can truly fulfill the desires of our heart. Authentic Beauty is a personal and practical book about becoming a set-apart young woman in today’s perverse generation.

by Amy Meyers and Tessa Thompson with the setapartgirl Team

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STORIES of Significance

All of us on the setapartgirl team share a mutual appreciation for and delight in soul-stirring quotes from great Christians of the past. Quotes adorn our walls, punctuate our speech, and often find their way into our emails and birthday cards to one another. And while we are always excited to discover a new quote and add to our ever-growing collections, each of us has a handful that have particularly impacted our lives in a meaningful way. We wanted to share with you a few of these quotes that God has used time and time again in our lives. May they encourage you and press you into Him as they always do us!

“We are not here to be overcome, but to rise unvanquished after every knockout blow, and laugh the laugh of faith, not fear.”

-Amy Carmichael

TESSA:

During my sophomore year of high school, I was walking through an increasingly difficult trial regarding my health. As I began to ponder the future, I grew very discouraged at how this particular problem would affect me in the days to come - marriage, family, ministry dreams, and daily life in general. One night, my mom’s friend gave me Proverbs 31:25: “Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come.” (ESV) There I was, crying about the “time to come,” but this valiant woman in Proverbs 31 was looking ahead and simply laughing! I was deeply inspired by this “laugh of faith” that fears neither the danger of the present moment nor the threat of tomorrow’s unknown. It is a laugh that flows out of an immovable, unwavering trust in the Almighty God and His infallible Word. From that time on, I cherished this godly example in Proverbs, and greatly desired to possess a faith that laughs.

It was years later that I came across this quote by Amy Carmichael in Gold Cord.

That same health problem had only gotten worse, and had caused many a “knockout blow.” But now I was being challenged once again to rise up, fix my feet upon the Rock, and laugh in the face of adversity, in absolute assurance of my God’s every ability to bring me through. Many days have surfaced in which there has been a temptation to wallow in a defeated despair, but these brave-hearted words of Amy Carmichael continue to press me toward a life of daily triumph in Christ Jesus – for that is what He purchased for us upon His blood-stained cross!

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LAUREN:

I came across this quote while reading Passion and Purity and have been challenged by it many times since. As a young woman desiring to live a life of entire separation to my King, I have learned that surrender is not a one-time event.

Entire separation necessitates a lifestyle of surrender, which means that I no longer pursue my will, but rather abandon my will and seek His. Instead of being motivated by my desires, I am motivated by a desire for His unhindered way in my life.

Psalm 84:11 says, “For the LORD God is a sun and shield; the LORD will give grace and glory; no good thing will He withhold from those who walk uprightly.” I remember reading that verse for the first time and being absolutely blown away by its simple truth. God does not keep good things from His children. Knowing this, I can trust that if He has not given something that I desire, then it is not His best for me.

And why would I want anything outside of what He chooses to give? Isaiah 55:89 says, “‘For My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways,’ says the Lord. ‘For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts.’” When I let go of my agenda and lay hold of His, I have lost nothing and gained everything – more of Him!

“...the deepest spiritual lessons are not learned by His letting us have our way in the end, but

by His making us wait, bearing with us in love and patience until we are able to honestly pray what He taught His disciples to pray: Thy will be done.”

-Elisabeth Elliot

“A pure heart is one to which all that is not of God is strange and jarring.”

-Tauler

MANDY: As the glorious beams of sunshine and the brilliant sparkles of diamonds, so is the radiant purity of the heart that has been redeemed by the precious blood of Jesus Christ! Tauler’s words, though simple and few, speak volumes of what the heart that has been purified and set apart for Christ is to be. Time and time again, these words have persuaded me to examine the guardedness of my own heart and they have pressed me to run to Jesus and allow Him to try and purify me afresh.

As I continue walking the narrow way, seeking to know Him and learn His ways, an ever-increasing defiance resides in my heart toward the filthy charm of the flesh and the world that stands in opposition to Him. By His grace, my surrendered heart has been softened to gladly receive His truth and stirred to jealously stand for His rightful rule in every area of my life. When I am faithful to dismiss thoughts that are contrary to Him, wholeheartedly embrace His truth, and draw near to His heart, I discover the greatest blessings and receive the wondrous riches of heaven that are only found in Christ!

“Blessed are the undefiled in the way, who walk in the law of the LORD. Blessed are they that keep his testimonies, and that seek him with the whole heart” (Psalm 119:1-2 KJV).

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AMELIA:

Since the first time I read this poem, maybe 10 years ago, it has been my all-time favorite quote. I have it memorized, and framed on my desk. Every time I read it, it convicts and inspires me to run after Christ. Elisabeth Elliot has for a long time been one of my heroes, and her life has inspired me in so many ways. But this quote of hers especially touches my soul in a deeper way. First, it’s a reminder that Jesus is the only one who can truly satisfy our hearts! It also reminds me that even in the midst of loneliness and uncertainty, we can be satisfied and at peace when we put our trust in and fix our eyes and heart on Christ – no matter where we are and no matter what happens. There’s also surrender and dedication in this poem – a laying down of what she desires and dreams, and a willing submission to follow the Lord wherever He leads. This quote reflects the desires of my own heart, and I sometimes use it as a prayer. Even in the midst of trials, He is worthy of my trust and obedience, and He is faithful to keep me all the way through!

“Perhaps some future day Lord, Thy strong hand will lead me to a place where I must stand utterly alone.

Alone, O gracious Love but for Thee; I shall be satisfied if I can see – Jesus only. I do not know Thy plans for years to come. My spirit finds its perfect home sufficiency.

Lord, all my desire is before Thee now Lead on, no matter where, no matter what – I trust in Thee.”

-Elisabeth Elliot

“‘Father, I’m not soaring today. Help me.’

‘Daughter, soaring is not always flying high above the world. Sometimes one is soaring only two feet above the ground, just enough to keep you from getting tangled in the thorns and crashing against the rocks.’”

-Amy Carmichael

MARLENE:

For years this quote was stuck to one of the doorposts of my bathroom, written in pink on soft pink note paper; that is, if I remember correctly, for the paper is a faded brownish color now. No doubt the worn-out look creates an even more special feel to it. But what’s more – these words have made their way into my heart, leaving behind deep footprints. It’s not so much the quote verbatim, but the essence and the message thereof.

Surely I knew the soaring days – flying high like an eagle above all the storms! Ah, if every day could be like that! But it was on the “low” days that I felt my utter need for the Father’s hand to keep me up, and His feet to show me the way. On my way to the shower each day my eye would catch these words on the doorpost and I would whisper: “Father, I’m not soaring today. Help me.” Then He would remind me of His answer – and faithfully keep that promise to me throughout the day! At the end of the day I would be able to declare His faithfulness again: “For You, O LORD, have made me glad by what You have done, I will sing for joy at the works of Your hands” (Psalm 92:4 NASB).

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AMY:

Ever since I can remember, I have been the epitome of a planner, list-maker, and organizer. I just love having everything thought through, orderly, and in place, both in my mind and in my day. But this scheduling nature can sometimes interfere with the arrangements that God is desiring to make in my life. Through the twists and turns of life, the unknowns, the upsets, and the unanswered questions, I have been challenged to simply release all of my self-made plans and allow the One who knows best to lead and direct my life – whatever the outcome, whatever the cost.

One of my favorite verses in the Bible is Psalm 62:5: “My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him” (KJV). I find myself returning to and meditating on this glorious reminder often. I must look to Him in restful, but joyful anticipation of how He will work out a situation, how He will direct my steps, or how He will provide for my every need.

So when I say, “I give up my own plans,” I am not carelessly casting them aside, but rather entrusting them to a faithful God. And as I place every desire, hope, and purpose into His capable hands, I have found that my Jesus never fails to do exceeding abundantly above all I could ask or think. He knows exactly what He is doing, and it is my job to simply give myself unreservedly and trust Him to work all things for my good and His highest glory.

*

“Lord, I give up my own plans and purposes, all my own desires and hopes, and accept Thy will for my life. I give myself, my life, my all utterly to Thee to be Thine forever. Fill me and seal me with Thy Holy Spirit. Use me as Thou wilt, send me where Thou wilt, work out Thy whole will in my life at any cost, now and forever.”

-Betty Scott Stam

brand new from leslie ludy

TRUE PURITY

STUDY SERIES 8-week DVD study series

[ ] for small groups or individuals -

with study guide included!

Fairy tale love stories are more than possible, even in today’s perverse and warped generation. But don’t expect to find a fairy tale by imitating the haphazard, hold-nothing-back version of romance you see all around you. Only when you are willing to become one of the “few” in this generation who wil go to all lengths to serve and honor your King will you experinece His very best in romance and guy friendships. Leslie Ludy’s True Purity study is a powerful and practical message that points young women to God’s design for lily-white purity. This 8-week study includes a 2-disc DVD set and accompanying study guide.

This study is designed for small groups or individuals, and is appropriate for young women of all ages.

coming soon!

take it deeper

WRITTEN BY AN ANONYMOUS WARRIOR-POET-IN-THE-MAK

KING

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imperishable

Beauty

Matthew, you have to wait your turn,” I quipped as he voiced

his immediate want for a whole rectangle graham cracker. Matthew was one of the little boys in childcare last week at church.

He seemed concerned about little more than the attention he gained in a room of eleven other toddlers. If another child had our attention, he immediately piped up about his architectural feat with the Lincoln Logs. If he noticed that I was reading a book to another child, he quickly came over and slid into the spot nearest the book. And if someone else had a cool costume on, he had to find an even cooler one. It was easy to excuse Matthew’s behavior because he was only three years old. But can you imagine such behavior from an adult?

Unfortunately, a young lady in our culture is taught from a young age – by media, friends, and even family – that it is profitable to draw attention to oneself. In accordance with such training, she constructs her adornment, her words, and her behavior to ensure that she is noticed. Most of what she does and says is designed to grab the attention of others. The declaration of her life is “Me! Me! Look at Me!” A true warrior-poet does not regard such behavior. Just as he esteems and strives for the character of Christ to mark his life, he esteems a woman whose life is also undeniably marked by the same behavior.

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In his first letter, Peter notes the following:

“Do not let your adorning be external – the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear – but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious” (I Peter 3:3-4 ESV).

Our society has confined modesty to a person’s outer garments, but God defines it on much broader terms. In the kingdom of heaven, modesty is not limited to external things, and neither is beauty. Immodesty is anything in a young lady’s life that would attempt to draw the gaze of others away from Christ. But modesty, and likewise, true beauty, is the gentle and quiet spirit that points every man and woman around her to the One who is most beautiful.

You will not find the woman a warrior-poet esteems, much less whom God esteems, “with the attire of a harlot and subtle of heart” (Prov. 7:10 KJV). A woman who is “subtle of heart” is one of craft and of guile, and her behavior is specifically tailored to turn the gaze of those around her from Christ and toward herself.

A warrior-poet greatly esteems a gentle and quiet spirit, but Scripture tells a young

lady to adorn herself with such behavior for a far more grand reason – because God esteems it; for “in God’s sight [it] is very precious.”

So, what does a gentle and quiet spirit look like practically?

I have noticed this behavior in the young lady who guards her conversation. She does not only omit one or two topics or simply have this disposition around certain people, but she consistently lives this out in all things. She keeps the sacred things in her life sacred by avoiding discussion of especially personal things with people who should not know them. Her conversation is void of gossip and slander. She has no pent-up anger or irritation toward those who may have done her wrong, thus she has no malice or deceit in her heart.

I have seen the gentle and quiet spirit in the girl who uses social media only to the end of glorifying Jesus Christ. Her guard goes far beyond mere verbal exchanges, and just as in conversation, she does not post every frustration or victory in her life for all to see. In the same way, she does not entertain (or rather, “like”) things that bring applause to men or are contrary to Truth.

The gentle and quiet spirit is one who spends her mornings – her entire life, actually – not building some artificial allure or attempting to look the most beautiful, but in pursuit of her King. Her clothing is not what makes her beautiful – Christ is.

I am not advocating that any young lady stop taking care of herself. But I

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Her clothing is not what makes her beautiful –

Christ is.

am saying that a young lady’s greatest obsession ought to be Christ, and not her physical appearance. She ought to spend the better hours of her morning seeking Him, not physical beauty. The life spent seeking temporal beauty attains its end, but the life spent seeking the Lord attains imperishable beauty.

The calling to this behavior, however, goes much deeper than mere beauty. When Peter defines a gentle and quiet spirit as one of “imperishable beauty,” he is alluding to chapter one of his first epistle: “...you have been born again, not of perishable seed but of imperishable, through the living and abiding word of God” (1 Peter 1:23 ESV).

The “living and abiding Word of God” is Jesus Christ, and we have been born of His incorruptible seed, He having crucified the corruptible seed of Adam. So, it is not the gentle and quiet spirit that produces lasting beauty; rather, is an outflow of the transforming life of Jesus Christ. It is the mark of the life that has been radically altered by the Gospel – this is the life that is also graced with enduring beauty.

Undying beauty, however, is not attained by mere discipline or determination. The meek and quiet spirit is not bestowed upon those who are most committed to humility. And though we are called to discipline our time and actions, the Gospel does not transform the committed ones, but rather, the ones full of unwavering faith. If we read a bit further in the passage in first Peter, we find one defining quality, a prerequisite for the woman with a gentle and quiet spirit: hope in God (see 1 Peter 3:5 ESV).

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The life spent seeking

temporal beauty

attains its end, but the life spent seeking the Lord attains

imperishable beauty.

The young lady whose confidence is placed in the person of Jesus Christ is one of imperishable beauty. Her hope is not in the conditions around her, the success of her endeavors for Christ, the stability of her family, or even the fruition of a God-written love story. Rather, her hope is in God, the work of the cross, and the promises of the Bible.

So, the clothing of a woman of faith is not a gentle and quiet spirit or imperishable beauty. These are merely an outflow of the clothing of a Christian, which is Christ (see Rom. 13:14, Gal. 3:27, and Job 29:14). You see, Christ is the source of all these things.

A branch does not attain the attributes of the vine apart from the vine. Neither will you attain beauty apart from Christ. The branch only bears fruit because of the vine’s provisions, and the fruit is always in keeping with the vine’s nature. If your hope is in God, and your foundation is Christ, your clothing is Christ and all the attributes thereof. His righteousness will become yours; His beauty, yours; His life, yours; His Spirit, yours.

A young lady who is given to the purposes of Jesus Christ – whose hope is in God – is marked by a gentle and quiet spirit, and it is to her givenness that Peter credits “imperishable beauty.” So, let me ask you a question, one that I pose to myself often: Is there anything in your life that draws the attention of others away from Christ?

A woman of imperishable beauty speaks of Christ, dresses to draw attention only to Christ, and lives to bring Him glory. Such a life is hidden in Christ, and it is from His life that beauty is derived and displayed through the yielded vessel. Only He can build a man or woman of upright character.

Now, I’m only a warrior-poet-in-themaking, but I esteem someone who is willing to live her life unseen and unnoticed so that Jesus Christ may be seen and noticed through her; a lady whose conversation is characterized by a concern for others and love for the Lord; whose unfailing declaration is “Christ! Christ! Look to Him!” Such is the young lady who exemplifies the imperishable, enduring, immeasurable beauty of Christ.

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Leslie’s Blog!

& Marriage mamahood Moments from my life.

MAMAHOOD: Commanding My Soul to Rejoice It’s been many years since I’ve battled with any kind of ongoing anxiety or depression.

As I’ve written about in the magazine and in my books, God in His mercy set me free from those pitfalls as I aligned my life with the Truth of His kingdom. And yet, whenever I’m walking through an especially challenging trial (which happens frequently due to our ministry position), there is the temptation to starting feeling a little…melancholy. My children need my energy, strength, and creativity. My husband needs my attentiveness and support.

But whenever I’m going through circumstances that are intense and uncertain, there is this bait to lose my emotional “umph” and not really give my best to my family, because I’m distracted...

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THE

of

PER

Presu

RIL

umption

by Tessa Thompson

honor & purity

R

ecently, one of my friends shared with me about the delicate place her heart was in regarding relationships with the opposite sex. Several times in the past, a young man had shown interest, led her to believe he wanted something more than a friendship, and then suddenly “dropped of the face of the earth.” These guys had either given a false impression of their intentions, or had simply changed their minds, and decided to make a quick and easy exit.

Each case only served to breed hurt, confusion, and disappointment in my friend’s heart, and she is now at the place where she has a tender nervousness at the thought of being misled and let down all over again. How can she keep herself from being deceived, especially by a guy who appears to love the Lord and bear the marks of a “real man?” How can she be sure he will heroically honor, protect, and cherish her heart, rather than confuse or disregard it?

While I was pondering my friend’s dilemma, I thought of the story God had scripted in my life over the past year with Nick, the man who recently became my husband. Unlike the obscure and perplexing relationships my friend had experienced, the growing friendship between me and Nick had not taken an indistinct turn down a road that suddenly led to nowhere. Any time I was around him or had a conversation with him, I did not leave in a flurry of perplexity, frustration, and questioning as to what his feelings were toward me. I never had

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reason to run home to my roommate and vent about some awful “emotional drama” Nick’s “undecipherable” actions were causing in my heart.

Rather, in the character of a true warriorpoet, Nick had been careful to act and speak with the honor and purity of nothing more than a brother in Christ. Knowing his responsibility as a man to protect my heart, he did not take lightly his interactions with me. He was friendly and yet not flirtatious; encouraging, but not endearing; caring and sincere, yet not with an undue affection that would give ground for questioning.

Knowing his responsibility as a man to protect my heart, he did not take lightly his interactions with me.

Though his feelings were only growing stronger over the course of several months, he did not impatiently begin throwing out hints in order to determine whether or not the interest was mutual. In fact, I had no idea of his feelings until he wrote me a letter expressing his heart. And because he had waited to write that letter until being

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absolutely sure of how the Lord was leading him, as well as receiving the blessing from proper spiritual authorities, he was able to state his intentions with confidence and clarity. He was not “sort-of-thinkingthat-maybe-we-might-have-something.”

He was not writing to inform me that he was “considering” the idea of something more than a friendship, but needed time to pray about it. And he did not write to suggest that we “try it out” and see if we clicked or not. In every stage – from the very beginning of the friendship to the day he initiated a relationship – the words he spoke (and the words he chose not to speak) served to guard my heart and mind against undue presumptions about something that “might be happening.”

A true warrior-poet is mindful of his responsibility to protect the feminine heart; and he takes that responsibility seriously by conducting his friendships and interactions with the opposite sex with caution and discretion. Instead of allowing selfishness, impatience, or plain indifference to steer, he allows the Spirit of Christ to direct his words and actions. And such a man is truly worth waiting for!

However, there is a flip side, sisters.

While true-warrior poets must be careful to not speak or act in such a way that would cause us to be confused or deceived about their intentions, we too have a great responsibility when it comes to friendships and interactions with the opposite sex.

he in

at ev

nitiated

very stage

Instead of allowing selfishness, impatience, or plain indifference to steer, he allows the Spirit of Christ to direct his word and actions.

leave them inHis hands

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We seem to have a natural tendency to read into things a bit too much. We carefully observe body language and facial expressions (Did you see that look he gave me? He doesn’t give that look to other girls!); we scrutinize every little comment made (What do you think he meant when he said that...?); we notice irregularities in others’ behavior (She always acts different around him!). Such inclinations have resulted in many a torn friendship, and far too many broken hearts, all because we simply assumed something and ran with it.

When I began to notice that my feelings toward Nick went beyond friendship, there were times when I wondered whether or not any of those feelings were reciprocated on Nick’s end. Given the circumstances, it appeared that God could indeed script a beautiful story out of the simple friendship that had formed, and at times I pondered such a possibility, questioning whether it was something He might bring about in the future.

As I noticed that my feelings were not leaving, I knew I needed to bring them before the Lord and leave them in His hands, where they belonged. I had no right to give in to any girlish propensity to begin assuming that God was doing something beyond what I could see. And God was faithful to make that abundantly clear to me one particular night when I was praying about my heart toward Nick.

It was as though a light bulb went off in my head: I have absolutely no idea if Nick has

ever considered me as anything more than a sister in Christ. God could have already made it clear to him that he was called to singleness. God could be stirring his heart

I had no right to give in to any girlish propensity to begin assuming that God was doing something beyond what I could see. for someone completely different.

In other words, the only conjecture I could make about Nick was that I was not allowed to make any further conjectures!

Even if a love story between him and me would have been something Christhonoring and pleasing to Him – it was not my place to expect or plan on any such thing to happen, and thus there was no room for assumptions.

As women, it is often easy for us to say we are letting God write our love stories, when in reality we are constantly contemplating, journaling, and chatting with our girlfriends about something we

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presume to be happening. And when we let these assumptions grow, they begin to manifest themselves in our thoughts, words, and actions toward that particular guy. Not only does this show a lack of trust and resting in the Lord, but it also leaves little room for God to raise up real warriorpoets who will courageously take on their roles as leaders and initiators, unafraid of rejection and willing to take a risk.

The fact is, God is much better at the business of scripting romances than we are, and our second-rate speculations, whether they be the result of unwarriorpoet behavior, or our own hasty and unwarranted expectations, only serve to steal from the beauty of such stories or set us up for heartbreak that could have been avoided. Yes, it may be true that sometimes our assumptions are correct; however, it is so much more fulfilling to simply sit back and let God surprise us, not to mention the joy of knowing the story was completely scripted by God and free of any human manipulation. I have said in a previous article that God does not need our help, but He does need our obedience. I would like to add to that, and say that God does not need our help, but He does need our trust. For when we truly stand back and leave the pen in His hands, purity overtakes presumption, masculinity overrides manipulation, femininity trumps facade – and the stage is set for a real warrior-poet to gallantly win the heart of a set-apart young woman.

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trust

. . . God does not need our help, but He does need our trust.

A SET-APARTWedding

Day

This summer, we were privileged to have two set-apart weddings take place at Ellerslie: Ben and Elsje Zornes and Nick and Tessa Thompson. (If you would like to read about their amazing God-written love stories in our previous issues, click here!) Both weddings were beautiful, Christ-focused, and radiantly pure (first kiss saved for the wedding day!). Hope you enjoy these glimpses of both of these memorable celebrations!

Somewhere With Seagulls photography

Ben & Elsje Zornes First of JULY 2012

Perfect love is a kind of self-dereliction, a wandering out of ourselves; it is a kind of voluntary death, wherein the lover dies to himself, and all his own interests, nor thinking of them, nor caring for them any more, and minding nothing but how he may please and gratify the party whom he loves.

- Henry Scougal

God always gives His best to those who leave the choice with Him. - Jim Elliot

Give my kindest love to my dear wife, and tell her that the uncommon union which has so long subsisted between us has been of such a nature as I trust is spiritual and therefore will continue forever.

- Jonathan Edwards

Somewhere With Seagulls photography

“Oh, to be married to the one you do love, and love most tenderly and devotedly...that is bliss beyond the power of words to express or imagination to conceive.�

-Hudson Taylor

Nick & Tessa Thompson Twenty-Third of August 2012

^

^ take it deeper

THE FIRST

90 DAYS OF MARRIAGE

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In this book you’ll learn how to avoid the typical mistakes many couples make in those first ninety days. And you’ll learn how to develop all the necessary habits for a happy, satisfying relationship - everything you need for an extraordinary marriage.

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Our Spiritual Act of Worship The word discipline has almost become taboo in today’s modern Christian world.

It conjures up images of dour legalism and miserable lists of rules and regulation.

Yet godly discipline is nothing of the sort. It is an act of worship; a crucifying of our own selfish, fleshly agenda, that we might surrender to Christ’s pure and perfect agenda. Discipline does not bring misery and restriction into our lives. Rather, it brings glorious freedom. When our flesh is under subjection to the Spirit of God, we are free to live as He calls us to live. We are able to give our time, our energy, and our lives fully to the things of His kingdom. Discipline is an amazing gift; an invaluable tool to usher us to the presence of the King of all kings.

We cannot give our hearts to God and keep our daily habits under our own control.

When we shy away from godly discipline, we quickly allow selfish patterns of laziness to rule our daily decisions; and we will find that our Christian life is made up of “good intentions” rather than a life lived in the presence of our King. Personally, I do not want to look back at my life and see countless mornings of pressing the snooze button when I could have been in the throne room of the Most High God. What heartbreaking regret.

Scripture puts a high value on waking up early, even before dawn, and giving the first-fruits of our day to God in prayer, worship, and seeking His face...

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Again,

Please!

by Amy Meyers

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For the last seven years

I have proudly borne the title of “nanny” to many precious children. And one of my very favorite things to do with little ones is read to them. Reading is a beloved pastime of mine and I have found that there is something so special about cuddling with a sweet kiddo and exploring a story together.

One little guy I watched full-time was by far the most enthusiastic reading partner I have ever known. His name was Mason.

When I started working for Mason’s family, he was not quite two years old, but had already developed a tremendous love for books. He would bring me a book and say, “Read this one?” as he plopped down in my lap, assuming the answer would be “yes.” It almost always was. I would finish the requested book and very often he would say, “Again, please!” So, we would revisit the epic escape of the multitude of spotted puppies or the lesson in sharing taught by the shimmering multi-colored fish for a second time. And more often than not, Mason would look up at me and say, “Again, please!” Usually after the fourth run through the same tale, I would beg him to choose another book, but if allowed, he probably would have been perfectly content for me to reread the same story more than ten times.

Five or six months into my time with this family, rather than saying, “Again, please!” when I had finished a story, Mason began asking to read the story to me after I read it to him. And to my amazement, this two-year-old started “reading,” the

entire book to me, repeating nearly every word verbatim while turning the pages at the appropriate time. It was incredible.

Because he had insisted on hearing the same handful of books over and over again, he had retained the information and was able to repeat it – and was even starting to recognize words! More than that, Mason would also remember the stories and talk about them later, making a connection between the characters and something he saw while we were taking a walk or while reading a different book. His mind was being opened more and more to the intricacies and fullness of the tale with every read.

In school, I was quite the bookish, nerdy type, but very much the opposite of Mason, never saying “Again, please!” after any of my classes. Instead, I remember being rather bored when my teachers went over a concept that I felt as though I had already grasped. I was looking for a challenge, not a repeat. But as the years progressed and my school work increased both in volume and difficulty, I began to see the value of going over and over something until it was concreted in my mind. Then I was able to build upon a strong foundation, rather than a meager understanding. Likewise, in my spiritual life, I have come to realize the absolute necessity of repetition for my growth and increased understanding of biblical Truth.

While I thoroughly enjoy reading something different in the Bible every day, I also find myself echoing Mason’s sentiments and eagerly saying, “Again, please!” as

I hungrily go back to certain passages over and over. Sometimes, I will read the entirety of the same book every morning for an entire week or month, so the words are fresh in my mind throughout the day.

Other times, I will read one specific Psalm or portion of Scripture that the Lord has hallmarked for that season of my life again and again.

I hungrily go back to certain passages over and over.

As I read Rainbow Fish for the fiftieth time, I must admit that I was lacking somewhat in the enthusiasm department. But Mason always seemed just as excited to read the story as he did the first time he heard it.

The thought of reading the exact same words day after day did not cause me to sit up straight and listen with attentive anticipation, but as I saw with Mason, there are greater riches and deeper understanding to be discovered by those who will continue to explore. There is much to be gleaned from even one pass through

Lay up these w

a text of Scripture, but I have found that once the words are familiar to me, I am able to see beyond them and allow the Lord to open my eyes to the meaning, the message, and the meat of His precious Truth. Here is what our God Himself has to say about repetition of His Word:

“Therefore you shall lay up these words of mine in your heart and in your soul, and bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall teach them to your children, speaking of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up. And you shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.”

Deuteronomy 11:18-20 God desires for us to constantly be thinking of, talking about, and looking at His words – for doing so is the only way to truly “lay up” His Truth in our hearts and souls.

In my third semester of Ellerslie Training, my class was asked to memorize the book of Ruth. We were given worksheets, a study schedule, and a whole lot of enthusiasm from the staff for our endeavor.

Granted, the book of Ruth is not very long; but when we were facing its memorization coupled with a pile of other homework and

in your heart and bind them your hand, be as between your

shall teach to your ren, speaking when you sit in

when you walk when you lie

and when

rise up.

write them upon the house and

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words of Mine and in your soul, as a sign on and they shall frontlets eyes. You

them childof them your house, by the way, down you

you shall doorposts of your on your gates.

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many intern duties, it seemed like quite a challenge. But repetition was the key to success. I remember reciting Ruth while I cooked dinner, as I drove to the store with my roommate, and on walks through my neighborhood. We organized study groups, shared memorization techniques, and filled the campus with the constant sounds of those beautiful verses. Ruth was everywhere. And at the end of our assigned time of studying the book, while we knew the words in their proper order, we all had gained so much more than the ability to recite four chapters without mistake. The act of memorizing this amazing story of redemption gave each of us an increased understanding of our own Kinsman Redeemer, Jesus Christ.

If all we gained by washing ourselves in the water of the Word each day was a detailed knowledge of a good collection of stories, there would really be no point in reading it. But because Jesus Christ Himself is what we glean, digging deep into the Bible regularly is an absolute necessity to the Christian life. His Word must become our meat and drink, that we might grow and learn how to walk more in step with Him each day.

“Thy word have I hid in mine heart, that I might not sin against thee.�

Psalm 119:11 KJV

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OUR GOD IS WORTHY AND WILL NOT FAIL TO REVEAL MORE AND MORE OF HIMSELF AS WE DIVE INTO HIS PRECIOUS WORD!

Mason really knew the stories that he had heard so many times, and frequently talked about the characters, events, and funny moments of those tales throughout the day. They were always on his mind because they had been so often before his eyes. In the same way, when we truly have hidden away the treasures of Scripture that the Lord deposits in us through His Word, they will be at the forefront of our minds and on the tips of our tongues. But more than mere stories, with His Word in our hearts we have solid rock under our feet and are equipped with all the ammunition we need to counter the attacks of the enemy. God desires for His children to walk in victory and triumph over sin, and He has given us the tools with which to do so. But we must be diligent to pour over His Word, soak in the riches to be found, and meditate upon it throughout the day. And it never fails that in moments of confusion, worry, or temptation, those precious promises and beautiful truths that I have tucked away in my heart come to the surface of my mind, bringing comfort, peace, and the souldeep joy of Jesus.

Such is the blessed reality for those who will approach God’s Word with the delight of a child, eager to read their favorite book for the hundredth time. Might our attitude be “Again, please!” every time we troll the depths of Scripture. Our God is worthy and will not fail to reveal more and more of Himself as we dive into His precious Word!

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ot long after I surrendered my life to Christ, I received a hope chest. It wasn’t anything fancy; just a small wooden bench that was meant to store special things for my wedding, future home, etc. But for all its simplicity, that hope chest turned out to be one of the best gifts I ever received. Right around the time that I began to experience true intimacy with Christ, life took on a brand new sparkle and freshness. For the first time, I began to notice and cherish sacred things.

While I had been living for selfish pleasure and falling prey to pop culture attractions, the word “sacred” hadn’t really been part of my vocabulary. Centering my life around popularity, pleasure, and the approval of the opposite sex had reduced everything in my existence to something worldly, sensual, and base.

But now that Christ had become the center of my life, He began to train me in the art of sacred living. I began to place a high value on special and meaningful things.

Art Sacred Living The

of

by Leslie Ludy

My hope chest became a storehouse of sacred treasures. In it, I kept journals that chronicled my intimate journey with Christ, poems and songs that had flowed out of my times of private worship, letters to my future husband, promises I felt God had given me, and special notes or sentimental gifts from my family members. Frequently, I would look through my chest, cherishing all the things that had become sacred in my life – my intimate fellowship with Him, my commitment to my future husband, and my relationship with my parents and

siblings. Once I began to value and cherish sacred things, life was full of beauty and richness like never before.

It was right around that same time that Eric came into my life. Observing his relationship with Christ illustrated to me at a whole new level what it meant to bring the sacred into my daily walk with my King.

Eric didn’t treat his relationship with God carelessly or take it lightly; rather he cherished his private times of communion

with his Lord above everything else in his life. He viewed his relationship with Christ as the most hallowed honor a person could ever have. This attitude of tender reverence inspired and amazed me. Most young Christians I’d encountered were the opposite – they treated Christ as a casual buddy. Prayer, worship, and intimate fellowship with Him weren’t typically valued as a high and sacred privilege by the Christians I’d observed. Rather, spending time with Christ was looked at as more of a duty or obligation.

But Eric’s walk with Christ was different. He kept most of the details of his intimate journey with Christ as something sacred and private, not to be shared with others. But even so, I was able to gather enough through observation to see that what Eric had with Christ was alive and vibrant, filled with hallowed, significant moments that dramatically shaped his life. He awoke every morning with a listening ear, fully expecting God to guide him, direct him, speak to him, and place divine appointments in his path. He stole away to be alone with God several times each day. He kept a journal of every intimate detail of what God was doing in his life, and his journal was one of his most prized possessions. Certain days of the year held extra meaning and expectation for him because they marked the anniversary of when he had taken a major step forward in his spiritual life. And inevitably, God would do something significant on the

very same date, as if to underscore the value of holding such reminders as important. His fellowship with his King was sacred and precious, and it was truly a sight to behold.

I began to apply some of the principles that I’d learned in watching Eric’s walk with God. Soon, my relationship with Christ became even deeper and more meaningful – filled with sacred, significant moments that propelled me forward in my

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intimacy with Him. As I learned to cherish and remember the meaningful things God had done in my life and the important truths He was teaching me, I was able to look back and see evidence of His hand in my life in incredible ways, and it served to greatly strengthen my faith.

When God began to script my love story with Eric, cherishing the sacred moments was what added the beauty and “fairy tale sparkle” to our romance. We treated every conversation as significant. We didn’t spend time together haphazardly, just hanging out watching movies or talking about shallow, trivial things. In fact, because Eric was away for much of our relationship, we weren’t able to spend a huge amount of time together. So each time we had the opportunity to enjoy each other’s company, we didn’t take it for granted. We talked about meaningful, purposeful things – shared stories of God’s faithfulness in our life, talked about His plans for our future together, prayed for the least around the world, studied His Word together, and read inspiring Christian biographies. After spending time together, we would each go home and journal what we felt had been special or significant about the conversation. Eric even gave names to many of our special conversations, like “The Night of the Shooting Star” (because we’d been out for a walk and seen a shooting star while talking) or “The Talk on the Grassy Knoll” (because we’d been sitting on a picturesque grass-covered hill during one important conversation). It probably would have sounded ridiculous to anyone

on the outside, but these little touches made our entire love story magical, rather than mundane.

my relationship with Christ became even deeper and more meaningful – filled with sacred, significant moments that propelled me forward in my Intimacy with Him. I still have journals filled with reminders of those sacred moments we shared together. I have meaningful letters we wrote to each other during the formation of our love story. I have poems and songs that Eric shared with me at strategic times in our romance. I still keep them in my hope chest. These sacred things are among

simplicity

Guarding Beauty and Simplicity

our most priceless treasures, and I don’t regret for one moment our emphasis on making our romance beautiful, no matter how corny or strange it might have seemed to anyone else.

Even to this day, Eric and I put a high priority on protecting the sacred things in life. And we’ve found this practice to be absolutely essential to making everyday life sparkle and glisten with heavenly beauty. People might make fun of us for our dogged determination to keep life sacred and meaningful. But very few people experience the romance of life the way we do, and we wouldn’t trade it for anything.

Protecting the sacred things is absolutely essential to making everyday life sparkle with heavenly beauty.

Guarding the sacred isn’t just something to apply to our love story or our walk with God. Rather, it can shape and influence every aspect of our daily existence. A young woman who has an eye for protecting the sacred naturally knows how to create beauty in her everyday life. A sacred lifestyle is the natural byproduct of a woman who is carefully protecting her inner life. Creating beauty in our outward environment is meant to be the outflow of the joy, beauty, and radiance we’ve cultivated in our inner life.

I’ll never forget reading the story of Betsy ten Boom, when she and her sister Corrie were first put into prison for hiding Jews in their home during the Nazi invasion. The prison was filthy, dark, rancid, and overcrowded with despairing, sick, miserable women. Corrie and Betsy were separated into different cells, and Corrie spent many days wondering how Betsy – who loved beauty, flowers, and sunshine – was fairing in such a destitute, ugly place.

Betsy had always had a gift for making things beautiful; for creating beauty all around her, no matter where she was, even on a meager income. But how could a dank prison cell be made into a haven? One day, Corrie got the chance to walk by Betsy’s cell and took a quick glimpse inside. To her amazement, she saw that somehow the bleak chamber had been transformed

into a sacred sanctuary. “Unbelievably, against all logic, the cell was charming,” Corrie wrote. “The straw pallets were rolled instead of piled in a heap, standing like little pillars among the walls, each with a lady’s hat atop it. A headscarf had somehow been hung on the wall. The contents of several food packages were arranged on a small shelf. Even the coats hanging on their hooks were part of the welcome of that room, each sleeve draped over the shoulder of the coat next to it like a row of dancing children.”

The sacred and beautiful environment Betsy had miraculously created was simply a reflection of the beauty and sacredness in her inner life. Even a dismal prison cell could not crush Betsy’s radiance and joy – because her inward beauty came from Jesus Christ. And that heavenly beauty could not help but spill over into her environment, no matter where she was.

The painter Thomas Kinkade wrote a little book coffee table book called

Simpler Times. It is one of the very best expressions of sacred living that Eric and I have ever read.

In it, he writes about the simple, meaningful life that he and his wife have chosen for their family; deliberately saying “no” to the materialism, rush, and frenzy of society and making time for precious memories instead. Here is how he describes his lifestyle: Most of us are so accustomed to over-stimulation that peace feels strange to us; it makes us nervous. Simplicity can be an acquired taste, especially in a society that revels in complexity.

But what an improvement when we finally begin to feel at home with a simpler way of life. What a surge of

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energy when we realize that saying no is really a way of saying yes to all we really care about.

Even if you don’t have a spouse and family to focus on, there are plenty of sacred dimensions to life that are worth cherishing and protecting. Your intimate, daily romance with Jesus Christ. Your study of His Word and going deeper in the Christian life. Your commitment to your future husband. Your relationships with family members and close friends. Your ability to do special things for people in your

the special gifts that God has given i n o r d e r t o m o r e effectively s e r v e H i s k i n g d o m . These are all sacred things that are worthy of your focus and protection. But like Thomas Kinkade said, when we become sucked into the frenzy of modern culture, sacred things are quickly crowded out of our life.

Many of us have unhealthy addictions in our life; habits that cause us to overlook the truly important priorities of life in exchange for the “urgent” demands of the moment. For some girls, spending time on Facebook is harmless, but for many of us it can become all-consuming, to the point where we fritter away hours each day on Facebook but only spend a few minutes a day in prayer. Texting with friends might be just fine for some girls, but for many of us it can become a massive distraction – focusing all our time and energy on our own little world, and becoming blind to the needs of those around us. Only you and God know what distractions are in your life that might be robbing you of the beauty and simplicity He desires you to have in your relationship with Him.

Making it Practical

life, and to create and preserve precious memories that will last a lifetime. Your w i l l i n g n e s s a n d a v a il a b i l ity to serve those in need. Your ability to cultivate

I encourage you to spend some time prayerfully evaluating the things in your life that cultivate your own sacred times of intimacy with Christ (i.e. uninterrupted quiet, worship music, a walk outside alone, etc.). Write down a list of things that could

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help you cultivate true intimacy with Christ. Then, write down anything in your life that distracts you from cultivating intimacy with Christ (i.e. television, extended time on Facebook, phone calls and texting, reminders of work projects, interruptions from roommates or family members, etc.). Then, prayerfully consider the practical steps you can take in order to remove those distractions. Sometimes, simply putting healthy boundaries around the “urgent” things in life can give you the ability to truly have time for what is most important on God’s priority list.

Creating Memories

One of the main things that helps to keep my romance with Christ so alive and vibrant is taking the time to create memorials of my journey with Him – a skill I learned from Eric back when he first came into my life. For me, keeping a journal has become an amazing way to remember and document the incredible things God is doing in my life. I write down scriptures that touch my heart, specific answers to prayer, and promises that I feel He’s given me. Chronicling the significant moments in my walk with God creates a memorial of His faithfulness to me, and greatly strengthens my faith and

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trust in Him as I grow and face new challenges. I still have the journals I kept during my blossoming romance with Eric. What an invaluable treasure to look back at them and be reminded of the special conversations we had, the beautiful promises God whispered to my heart, and the amazing ways in which He scripted our love story.

Another way I create memorials in my relationship with God is to write songs about specific things He’s teaching me, or significant experiences I have in my walk with Him. Sometimes the songs are good enough to share with others, but even if they are not, it doesn’t matter - they help to commemorate something precious and meaningful in my spiritual life. Singing them, even years later, reminds me once again of the faithfulness of my God. Eric and I love to write songs together about the amazing truths we discover in God’s Word, something we did a lot of during the early days of our friendship. We still have them in a special notebook and we love to go back and sing them – they remind us of the fire and passion that filled our spirits when we learned an important spiritual truth for the very first time.

Christ cautions us in Revelation 2:4 against “[forsaking our] first love.” One of the best ways to keep our love story with our Heavenly Prince fresh and alive is to remember and cherish His

fingerprints upon our life story. Amy Carmichael often wrote poems about significant things her Lord taught her. Keith Green wrote songs to commemorate God’s work in His life. Rees Howells offered God “thank offerings” for spiritual victories by giving something of significance to someone in need.

Chronicling the significant moments in my walk with God creates a memorial of His faithfulness.

Consider some ways that you can begin to cherish the significant moments in your walk with Christ. Even if they are only small things that no one else would appreciate, remember that this is something special between you and the Lover of your soul. Begin asking yourself how you can create memorials whenever He does something important in your life. A friend of mine often makes an artistic collage to memorialize God’s work in her life. Another friend takes beautiful black and white photos and frames them – sometimes with an important Scripture verse scripted over the picture. Whether you choose to journal, write a poem or song, paint a masterpiece, or do something else that is unique to you, taking the time to commemorate the “God-moments” of life will add sparkle, romance, and beauty to your spiritual journey – and keep your First Love fresh and alive.

Those who excel at the art of sacred living know how to savor the romance of life, the beautiful joy and simplicity of knowing Him, and walking in His presence. It doesn’t happen by adopting a self-focused, pleasure-seeking attitude, but by learning how to cherish and value the opportunities that God gives us in each day. Daily life is bursting with opportunities to enjoy His amazing creation; opportunities to cultivate relationships with family and friends; opportunities to build God’s kingdom; opportunities to create, to sing, to dance, to worship, to serve, to laugh, and to learn. Are we letting those sacred moments pass us by? If so, it’s time to return to the peaceful, still waters and green pastures of daily intimacy with our King. No other lifestyle compares to one lived in His presence! *

Those who excel at the art of sacred living know how to savor the romance of life, the beautiful joy and simplicity of knowing Him, and walking in His presence...

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Daily life is bursting with opportunities to enjoy His amazing creation; opportunities to cultivate relationships with family and friends; opportunities to build God’s kingdom; opportunities to create, to sing, to dance, to worship, to serve, to laugh, and to learn.

Meet Clarita

SISTER OF THE

common life Q: When did you come to Christ and choose to live fully set-apart for Him? I grew up as the oldest child of missionary parents, and we lived deep in the heart of the jungles of Belize, Central America, for four years. My family and home was one of deep love and passion for Jesus Christ, and I really don’t ever remember a time that I did not love Jesus. As a child, I would hold “Bible studies” for the Indian children that crowded around our front porch, and tell them the stories my mother so tenderly read to me. At the age of six, I first heard the call of God to receive Him as Savior, and from then on I was very conscious of honoring Jesus, being obedient to my parents, and having an open ear to His gentle voice. But at the age of 14, I bowed to Jesus as Lord, not only as Savior, and surrendered my life to Him. This is when I feel that I owned my faith for myself; it was not something I did because of my family or my church or anyone else – this was between the God of heaven and a simple teenage girl.

There was a period of time, very regretfully, that although I did not walk away from God fully, I did not walk with Him closely, and I had to come back in repentance. Since then, the surrender has continued in deeper and fuller ways, as God reveals areas of my heart and life that are not in alignment with Him. There are times when surrender is hard and painful; but it is hard and painful only to the flesh. To the spirit, surrender is accompanied by great hope, trust, and joy! I am still learning this, day by day. To be set-apart for God is a daily choice to move deeper into the heart of God.

There is nothing better than knowing that all is well between my heart and my God...

Q: What have been some of the greatest challenges and joys in living as a set-apart woman?

I would say the great challenges have been the misunderstandings of people I would expect to understand. It seems understandable that non-Christians would raise eyebrows and give criticism to one who chooses to live a life of abandon to Jesus Christ; it is much harder when the criticism comes from those within the body of Christ. One of my constant prayers is that I would hear the voice of Jesus in the middle of all the other voices, and that I would learn to trust what He is saying, to live with a heart wide open, and to never harbor bitterness or anger toward anyone.

Sometimes this has made for lonely times when I have not had many friends who also share the desire for God so deeply. And then other times, God brings relational blessings like gushing waterfalls – rich, deep, and so encouraging.

I smile as I write this, because the joys are so rich and full! I think the greatest joy is the deep, settled peace in my heart of hearts, that I am abiding in my sweet Jesus, and He is in me. It is the Mystery of mysteries, it is heaven come down, it is the King of Eternity residing within. This reality, even on days of misunderstanding, tired children, and obedience training, brings a rest to my

soul if I return back and dwell on who He is and what He has given. There is nothing better than knowing that all is well between my heart and my God, and the peace that results from such knowledge is a heart-joy that one can only try to explain.

Q: What advice would you give to young women who are in a relationship that is headed toward marriage?

If you are fully assured of the blessing of Jesus upon your relationship, then I would say enjoy it to the fullest! The time of love blossoming and of a growing relationship is such a beautiful picture of Christ and His church, and to be given the opportunity to mirror His purity and love is such a privilege! And secondly, I would say, prepare not just for the wedding, but for the marriage. Yes, the wedding day is so exciting and a much-anticipated day. It is so thrilling to plan the details and think of wonderful, beautiful ideas! I absolutely loved that time of my life! But I think it is important to remember to put even more thought

into the marriage. The wedding day is just that: one day. Marriage is for a lifetime, and the most preparation should go into that which is most lasting.

Search the Scriptures, take time to quiet your heart before the Lord and to hear Him speaking, and learn from other women whose marriages you admire and are a reflection of Christ.

Q: As you are raising three young children, what is the vision God has given you for set-apart motherhood?

First, being set-apart is primarily an outflow of something much greater: a relationship with Jesus Christ. Secondly, setapart mothering is not just about me; it is also about my relationship with my husband.

The strength of our family depends largely upon the strength of our marriage.

The greatest challenge is to keep my heart right before my Lord; to live with a heart of rest and peace moment by moment. And to be honest, some days that is very difficult! It’s easy to get lost in the piles of laundry, or get frustrated by endless amounts of dirt trekked across the floor or spills at the dinner table, and feel too busy to read yet another story or take the time to discipline in a way that shows Christ and is not reactionary on my part. Mothering is a character builder for me on a daily basis, and some days I fail miserably! But as Proverbs says, “...a righteous man falls seven times, and

rises again� (see Prov. 24:16 NASB). And I want to be one who continues to rise. When I fall on my face in failure, I will first rise to my knees in repentance and ask for fresh grace, then begin again. I never want to be too proud to ask the forgiveness of my children, and I want them to realize from their first memory, my daily dependence upon Jesus Christ.

One aspect of our vision is to be an outward-focused family. I do not ever want my children to think that the world revolves around our little household, and caters to our every whim and desire. I want my children to grow with an awareness of other people, both in the community where we live and the world as a greater sphere.

Mothering is a character builder for me on a daily basis...

In the event of natural disasters, I show my kiddos pictures of the devastation and we pray for those people. We talk about children in other countries who are their ages but do not have mommies or daddies or food to eat. We support a child in South America and talk about her and pray for her.

It is so precious to hear Zoe (age 5) and Olivia (age 3) laying in their beds at night, talking about how they will go help the poor children, and how Zoe tells Olivia, “And we will do whatever it is that God tells us to do!� It is so humbling as a parent to hear that, because I am such an imperfect representation

of Jesus Christ to them, and I know they will potentially love or reject Him based on the reality of my relationship with Christ.

Q: What are some practical ways you have cultivated a set-apart atmosphere in your home?

I think a lot of the choices we have made for a set-apart atmosphere have come from looking forward into the future and envisioning what we want our children and our home to be like. This often means that today is more challenging and requires a lot more effort in parenting because of something we desire for our family in the future.

There are certain things that are off-limits in our home, some of the “normal childish behavior,� such as screaming, whining, and disobedience. And then there are the more subtle things, such as bad attitudes, selfishness, and being grumpy, that are just as off-limits. Attitudes are a lot more challenging to deal with and train, because they are of the heart and not just outward behavior, but they are what make a home either a wonderful place to be or a place that no one wants to be. We are so far from

perfect, and we have so much to learn and grow in, but we are also following hard after Jesus and He alone is the standard by which we live, and by which we raise our children.

Before disciplining, rather than using psychology and guilt trips, we ask the child about their behavior and say, “Did ______ bring glory to Jesus?”

That is the first question, and even a tiny two-year-old knows the answer. In disciplining we so desire to show the character of God to our children, rather than a reactionary explosion.

Jesus...is the standard by which we live, and by which we raise our children.

On the flip side, we want to readily praise our children for good behavior, and tell them, “Sweetie, it brings glory to Jesus when you are kind to your sister!”

And it’s so heart warming to hear them come tell us, “Mommy, I was sharing and wasn’t mean! I was bringing glory to Jesus!”

We have made the choice to not have a television in our home, and are very selective about movies and media input. Rather than having the steady stream of media and then trying to explain what is right and wrong, we want to have a steady stream of “right” so that “wrong” which goes against God and Scripture will be clearly identified by our children. This is what has been right for our family.

And even apart from media influence, I do not want to raise a family that is dependent upon electronics for entertainment. Electronics have a place, definitely, but I want children who have imaginations like Anne Shirley, who enjoy being creative for fun, who develop talents, abilities, and hobbies in their free time, and who are stimulated by books and authors with great minds.

I laugh when I see my two little girls charging across the backyard, pretending to be “nice pirates” as they sail across the “ocean.” I love their imaginative play that can entertain them for hours, pretending to be mommies and asking their

dollies if they were being obedient, and I laugh when I hear the conversations they think Mary and Joseph had in the stable at Christmastime. Sometimes I require the kids to play by themselves, and other times I do things with them.

It is more work to pull out an art project than a movie; it takes more time to work on phonics, bake cookies, or play a game of memory than to rely on media entertainment; but it is also helping them to become thinkers and to communicate, teaching them skills, and to love and be loved.

Q: How has God challenged you to continue to live a poured-out life even while you are raising a family?

To be honest, that is a challenge in this busy time of life. I have three children, five and under, and sometimes in a given day it feels like all I can do is care for the three littles. Being on call 24 hours a day, staying up at night with an infant, maintaining household cleanliness and order, making sure no one is going hungry, providing nourishing meals for my husband upon his return from work, being the laundress, the chef, the baker, the secretary, the K-4 teacher, the peacemaker, the art teacher, the gardener, the mother, the wife – is all a full-time job in and of itself. Some days that is all I do, and I know that a life poured out for my family is worship to God.

...a life poured out for my family is worship to God I do feel that my first priority is my family, and to care for them is my first responsibility. But even that, I think, is a training ground for my kids, and I want to constantly be teaching and showing them how to be poured out for others. Sometimes this means explaining to them something I am doing, whether it is teaching a Bible study for young girls, or talking about current events and praying together for people in other countries. And other times it is involving them with us, and teaching them to have eyes to see the needs around them, both locally and internationally. Our church visits local nursing homes once a month to sing for the elderly people, and we take our little children and go along. We know a lot of young families, and sometimes we do

something as simple as cook a meal for a new mother. Or the kiddos and I will bake together and take a plate of warm cinnamon rolls or fresh bread to a neighbor.

I do think though, that pouring out is first of all a heart attitude before a physical doing, and that comes by spending time with the Lord through prayer, and receiving His heart for the destitute and those who are needy. I pray often for the Lord to expand my heart and to help me care for those things that He cares for, to break my heart for what breaks His. And this will be my prayer my whole life long.*

A FEW OF CLARI TA’S FAVORITE THING S

my dear husband, soft velvety cheeks of little children, hot coffee with whip ped cream, a child ’s laughter, a sweet antique find after perusing a ju nk shop, creating an atmosphere of beauty, songs that draw me in worship to God, a handwritten letter, little arms around my neck, m y three sisters, m isty mornings

Q&A

with Leslie

Q&A

Q: A:

Ever since I have made the decision to live set-apart for Christ, I’ve lost most of my friends. How do I deal with the loneliness and rejection I feel as a result of my decision to live differently?

A set-apart young woman has the courage to be different. Leonard Ravenhill wrote, “He (or she) who fears God fears no man” (Why Revival Tarries, p.

34).

While other young women strive to be noticed and accepted by the world, the set-apart young woman cares for no opinion but God’s. Most of us spend an incredible amount of time and effort trying to explain away the holy calling upon our lives, rather than unapologetically embracing it and allowing God to accomplish this profound miracle in and through us.

It is critical that we lay down our craving for the world’s approval. When we become the holy temple of the living God, we will not be understood or accepted by the sinful, carnal world around us. In fact, if we are applauded and approved by secular society, then in all likelihood we are not truly allowing the Spirit of God to fully own and operate us. Jesus said, “If the world hates you, you know that it hated Me before it hated you. If you were of the world, the world would love its own. Yet because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you” (John 15:18-19).

And it makes me sad to say this, but the scorn we receive might not come only from unbelievers. If we embrace the sacred decorum of set-apart femininity, it is probable that many of our fellow brothers and sisters in Christ will look at us with a sketchy eye. That’s because modern Christianity, by in large, is far more concerned about impressing the world than being consumed with Christ alone. The popularity of seeker-sensitive mega-churches – where Bibles are left at home in exchange for fancy Starbucks drinks and where kids play Xbox during Sunday School – is just one example of how the modern Church has watered down the Christ-life to nothing more than joining a social club.

Q&A Don’t be discouraged or derailed by the scorn of the world or the disregard of mediocre Christians. Rather, if you find yourself the target of criticism for Christ’s sake, rejoice in the realization that you are on the right track.

Remember that “all who desire to live godly in Christ Jesus will be persecuted” (2 Tim. 3:12 NASB). Every set-apart woman who has made a dent in world history walked this path.

Take some time to prayerfully write down your commitment to live setapart from this world, and to live for the applause of heaven rather than the approval of pop culture. You might want to frame your commitment and place it somewhere where you can see it every day and be reminded of the sacred call upon your life.

WW Study the example of Mary of Bethany (see John 12:3-7), who poured out her most priceless possession upon the feet of Jesus, despite the scorn and disapproval of those around her. Settle it once and for all that this is the path you have chosen; to forsake everything, take up your cross and follow Him – no matter what the cost. And know that He will enable you to fulfill His purposes for your life.

To take this message deeper, I encourage you to read my article entitled Normal Christianity, available here (on page 6) and to listen to Eric’s message, The Costly Gospel, here.

Settle it once and for all that

this is the path you have chosen

take it deeper

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Tensile Strength Train

letting your children make you s

by Leslie Ludy

ning

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“Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one’s youth.”

Psalm 127:4

hen our first child, Hudson, was W born, Eric and I felt like we had been run

so worn-down from the new adventure of parenting that we could hardly function.

over by a bus. Seriously. Hudson was an extremely high-maintenance baby – and Though we very much loved our little boy, he hardly ever slept. While other parents we wondered what God had been thinking seemed to peacefully stroll through the when He sent such a high-needs baby mall or the park with their serene child our way. The Bible says that children will asleep in the stroller, Hudson was wired for sound, wide awake, fidgeting, fussing, and wanting attention almost twenty-four hours a day. Other moms would brag about how their newborns slept peacefully for eight hours each night from the day they came home from the hospital.

But Hudson had acid reflux, which would cause him to wake up screaming every thirty or tensile strength training. forty minutes all night long. After about four months of this, I was at wit’s end. We had not gotten more than bring strength into their parents’ lives (see a couple hours of broken sleep each night Psalm 127:4-5). But having a child only since our new little blessing from heaven seemed to fill our lives with exhaustion. had arrived. We were trying to fulfill book Parenthood certainly was not making us deadlines and run our ministry, but we were strong. Or was it?

God began to awaken us to a hidden opportunity being presented to us through our baby:

Several months into our new life of fatigue and sleeplessness, God began to awaken us to a hidden opportunity being presented to us through our baby: tensile strength training.

The strength of rope is measured by the term “tensile strength.� Great weights are tied to the rope and then dropped to test the resiliency of the rope under stress. The greater the ability for the rope to endure weight and combative force, the stronger the tensile rating.

Our souls are measured the very same way. If we have never focused on building our tensile strength, then even the smallest weights and stresses will cause us to snap. But if we are willing to build our tensile strength and train like an Olympian, our soul will be able to endure weights even as gargantuan as imprisonment and torture. The heroic Christians throughout history that gave up their lives in such astounding ways were the ones who trained their inner physique to handle the greatest pressures and stresses life could throw their way.

Hudson Taylor, for example, was known as a man who could endure the most extreme crisis with unshakable calm and unwavering confidence in the faithfulness of His God. Throughout his Christian life, he faced incredible hardship, fatigue, and stress beyond what a normal human can handle. Most others would have crumbled physically and emotionally under the weights that he carried. But by God’s grace, Hudson Taylor allowed each challenge, each trial, and each hardship to build his inner tensile strength.

And thus, every difficulty that came into his life only made him stronger and not weaker.

Eric and I realized that the difficulty and inconvenience of raising a high-strung baby could either strengthen us or weaken us. It all depended on how we responded to the opportunity God was putting in front of us. Thus far,

we had only focused on the hardship, the lack of sleep, and the frustration of having a child that never seemed to settle down.

But now, we began to thank God for the opportunity to be made strong through the new challenges of parenting. We began to stop complaining and start rejoicing every time we had to wake up in the middle of the night (which was a lot!).

realm we should have been weak, we actually became stronger. We were able to calmly handle things that used to crush us.

Our bodies became disciplined – instead of our desire for rest controlling us, now we were able to immediately respond to the call of God, even from a dead sleep, instead of yielding to the selfish cravings of our flesh to roll over in bed and pull the covers over our head. We began to catch As we embraced the training opportunity a glimpse of what Paul meant when he God had given us, it was amazing to see said, “…I discipline my body and make what happened. Though in the natural it my slave, so that, after I have preached to others, I myself will not be Unlike almost any other disqualified” (1 Cor 9:27 NASB).

challenge, babies and young children can provide one of the very best training grounds for spiritual and physical discipline.

Since those early days with Hudson, we have discovered time and time again that children truly do present the most amazing opportunities to build tensile strength. Children are not convenient to one’s flesh. Newborn

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When Harper came home from Korea, she was on the opposite time zone from us, so she slept all day and was wide-awake all night. Right as she fell asleep, Hudson was waking up for the day. This went on for many weeks and it felt like many years!

So once again we had a tensile strength opportunity to embrace. And through it, God made us stronger and prepared us for the powerful all-night prayer sessions He was calling us to.

babies are not considerThe most extreme ate of their parents’ desire for rest, sleep, quiet con- challenges we have faced in versation, or a predictable our parenting have been the schedule. And there is no very tools God has used to “break,” no reprieve, from the responsibilities of being equip us for the epic life-ora parent – it is always there, day after day, night after death battles we have had night. Unlike almost any to fight in our ministry. other challenge, babies and young children can provide one of the very best training grounds for spiritual and physical discipline. If we are willing to rise up and accept the challenge, they can make us strong and fit for the battles we are called to fight in this Christian life.

Eric and I have discovered that the most extreme challenges we have faced in our parenting have been the very tools God has used to equip us for the epic life-or-death battles we have had to fight in our ministry.

all the strength I needed to speak Truth boldly, even though my body felt weak.

When we first launched Ellerslie, one of the most intensive ministry tasks we have ever undertaken, our four children were all under the age of four, three of them in diapers. Not the most convenient situation! We actually had a veteran pastoral couple (who’d never had children) tell us that because of the extra responsibility of having so many young children, there was no way we would be able to handle all the pressures and weights that came along with a discipleship ministry.

Yet the opposite was true! Our children actually trained us to stay spiritually sharp, to buffet our flesh, to say “no” to laziness and weakness, and to do hard things without complaining or arguing.

Without our children as a training ground, I am not sure we would have been properly equipped for the intensity, responsibility, and discipline of the ministry we were called to. Because of what God had taught us through our kids, we were truly

When Kip came home from the hospital as a newborn, he struggled with sleeping through the night and acid reflux, much the same way that Hudson had. At the same time, I was in my first trimester of pregnancy with Avy and dealing with extreme nausea and fatigue. It was yet another season of being supernaturally made strong through our weakness; learning how to rejoice the moment we heard his cry, no matter what our bodies were telling us. This training prepared Our children actually me for my setapartgirl event many months later, when I needed to give trained us to stay an entire weekend conference to spiritually sharp, to several hundred girls just one week before my due date, and was feeling buffet our flesh, to say like I was about to pop! But I knew “no” to laziness and that just as God had sustained me in the early days with Kip, he would weakness, and to do sustain me in my last few days of the hard things without pregnancy. I knew from experience that I could rely on Him to give me complaining or arguing.

ready for the battle. We have discovered that children really are like arrows in the hand of a mighty man! Though they seem to usher only weakness into a parent’s life, in God’s pattern they bring the most amazing strength.

If your children are bringing difficulties and inconveniences into your life (and what kids don’t at some level?), then I would

encourage you to embrace this amazing opportunity God has given you. Allow Him to use each challenge in your parenting to produce greater tensile strength in your life. You will be amazed at how, in weakness, He can make you stronger than you ever thought possible – temper tantrums, morning sickness, sleepless nights, little-kid messes and all! *

Because of what God had taught us through our kids, we were truly ready for the battle.

kiddo spot

Harper, age 5

cute stuff

the ludy kids are “saying and doing”

We found some toads and a salamander trapped in one of our window wells. Daddy helped the kids “rescue” the creatures. First he lowered Hudson into the well, but when he caught a glimpse of the salamander, he thought it might be a snake and wisely called off the mission. Once we determined it was not a snake, brave little Harper who loves all slimy and squishy things wanted to go down. She does not shy away from odd-looking creatures, but boldly grabs them with her cute little mitts – without even a flinch or a squeal. I can see her being a park ranger or something along those lines!

She heroically saved several toads and one large salamander, and then the entire Ludy family ceremoniously took them to the lake behind our house and let them go.

Kipling, age 3

The other night at the dinner table, Dubber was talking nonstop, without taking a breath, and switching subjects almost as fast as he could think. In the space of five seconds, he said the following, “This spaghetti is so good, Daddy! Why was I adopted? That fly is going to get killed with a flyswatter. Why did Jesus die on the cross?” We didn’t even have time to answer his deep and probing questions before he switched gears to something completely different!

Avy, age 3

Avy was playing with Duplo blocks (large legos) and building a tower on the dining room floor. I walked by and was about to make an encouraging comment about her construction, but she put her hand up before I could say anything and told me matter-of-factly, “Mommy, you can say ‘wow’ in just a minute.” I went into the kitchen and about three minutes later she called out, “Okay Mommy, you can come say ‘wow’ now!”

Hudson, age 7

While walking through a nearby park the other night, we happened upon a Colorado Eagles’ hockey booth – where kids could try their hand at shooting a hockey puck. If they made it into the hole after four tries, they won a t-shirt. Hudson wanted to try, and since he’d never even held a hockey stick we didn’t have a lot of confidence he would make it. However, he nailed it on the first try! Even more amazing, he was using a left-handed stick – which he insisted he wanted to try. The guy at the booth said no one had made it in the hole all day long – so Hudson was beaming with pride at his accomplishment! He now wants to go out for ice hockey since he’s discovered this new talent!

setapartgirl Want to be involved? (we’d love for you to)

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OUR TEAM

RECOMMENDS

GOOD READS.

Amy Recommends:

THE ORIGINAL ELSIE DINSMORE SERIES

by Martha Finley

While we do not normally recommend fiction, these classic books are one of the few series that are full of solid Truth and beautifully given lives. I fell in love with these books and little Elsie as a young girl, but in revisiting them as an adult, the life of the grown-up Elsie from the later books in the series has been such a wonderful challenge to my soul, and a lovely example of a life set apart. She is a true lady marked by grace, elegance, and poise; but she is also a woman of the Word, a guardian of Truth, and an unashamed lover of Christ. No matter her companions or circumstances, Elsie does not act or speak to impress the world, rather she lives in complete surrender and obedience to her Beloved, seeking to gain the applause of One. Every page of these beautiful volumes presses me to live with the same radical abandon and unfaltering obedience to my King.

Marlene Recommends: LET ME BE A WOMAN

by Elisabeth Elliot

This book holds the words of a mother to her only daughter who is engaged to be married. With heart-to-heart encouragement, sincere advice, and wise counsel, she cheers her daughter on to a life of commitment to this one man. With God’s Word and His principles leading the way, she lays a strong foundation and erects some of the greatest pillars of a solid marriage. As I was reading this book, I began to realize that these same principles also apply to a life of commitment to God. Although I am not a wife-to-be, I belong to Someone. I am God’s woman. And suddenly these “words of a mother to her daughter” became the words of a mother-in-the-faith, cheering on her daughter-in-the-faith toward a life of commitment to her soul’s Husband. Thank you, “mother” Elisabeth!

(Please note: this book may not be appropriate for younger girls)

Annie Wesche, Creative Director Correspondence from Haiti

The

Haiti Letters

with love

THE HAITI LETTERS number three | Sept . 10, 2012

My dear friends, I’m writing to you once more with joy, from the beautiful shores of Haiti.

This letter is special to me, because I get to present the first two babies for whom God brought me to live in Haiti for this season.

One evening in mid May, Eric and Leslie shared with our ministry staff about twin babies in Haiti they were pursuing to adopt. These infants had been discarded, abandoned in Haiti’s trash ditches and were now struggling in their fight for life. After a few days of prayer, it was decided that I would move to make my home in Haiti with two little babies until their adoption is completed and they can come home to Colorado.

I have witnessed Eric and Leslie’s lives up close for the past seven years.

I’ve worked alongside them, been led to greater depths of Christian Truth under their discipleship, been forever impacted by their constancy and integrity of testimony, gleaned from their godly example as parents, and had what I hold as one of the greatest privileges and joys in my life – the role of nanny to their first four kiddos. So, at the mention of two more Ludypie-cuties, it was a natural response of my heart to come be “Annie the nanny” once more. So, without further adieu, here’s a sneak peek at two of the cutest, squishiest, and sweetest cuddle-bug babies in the world!

THE HAITI LETTERS number three | Sept . 10, 2012 INTRODUCING

rees william ludy This little fighter had a rough first few months of life. Scabies, sores on his feet, more scabies, skin infections, ongoing pain, itching, respiratory issues, and more scabies. But our Lord Jesus who has glorious plans for this baby boy is turning his beginnings into a story of triumph. God is training this little man-in-the-making to have great tensile strength and an uncomplaining spirit. And Rees is now on his way to competing with his daddy for being the happiest man on planet earth!

Rees is a cuddle bug, snuggle bear. He has great big hands and feet which make me think this little guy will one day be a tower of a man. A strong man with a prayer-warrior, rescuing heart. Even though he’s just 8 months old, he’s showing a sweet gentleness in using those big, baby fat hands to hold the hands of other crying babies or grab your face to pull you in for a big kiss on the cheek!

He’s given us hints of his aspirations to be a preacher one day like his daddy. He sits up tall, stretches his arms wide, waves his big, squishy hands in the air and with a loud, intentional voice, preaches his own sermon with more conviction than many a pulpit-filler!

Today Sept. 2012

given photography

Today Sept. 2012

given photography

THE HAITI LETTERS number three | Sept . 10, 2012 INTRODUCING

lily elyse ludy This little lady who once had hopeless eyes, a bloated belly, and frail arms and legs (with skin so loose it wrinkled and drooped), is now the squishiest bundle of laughter and lively hope you’ll meet! Her body was once so weak that her own laugh would nearly knock her over. But those first giggles of victory multiplied, bringing health to her little spirit, and they are the testimony of God’s mighty power to heal, save, and restore!

Lily is a powerhouse of life and joy! As soon as a bit of chub began to fill up her little legs she was flying across our small apartment in her baby walker. She claps and dances, does the military crawl (the only real way to move on cool, tile floors), plays peek-a-boo, and thanks Jesus before eating her creamy peas or delicious pureed mangos. She kicks her way through ocean waves and with wide eyed courage goes down under the water. But one of the most beautiful things about Lily is that she laughs with delight at the joy of others. If I’m tickling little Rees boy, you’ll hear a merry laugh bubble out of Lily’s heart as she watches it all. This little princess will certainly be a joy-bringer to many and I see God fashioning her into a dauntless woman of faith, charging into life with a courageous joy in Jesus.

THE HAITI LETTERS number three | Sept . 10, 2012 When Eric and Leslie were first told of these little ones, the babies were failing to thrive and near death. Lily had never smiled and was on a feeding tube. Rees was sickly, fighting infections ever since he had been rescued. But arming themselves with the weaponry of prayer and faith, Eric and Leslie stood upon the Word of the Lord, and closed their ears to the enemy’s boasts. And from the very first day until now we are all beholding daily miracles in these children’s lives – testimonies that God’s word holds true, His love never fails, and He is the High Commanding Rescuer!

The more I fall in love with these babies, the more I look forward to the day when they will go home for good into the arms of their Mommy and Daddy and four Ludy brothers and sisters. It is the sweetest privilege to love God’s babies here in Haiti. But as I have been shown more and more in my walk with Christ, the place of greatest joy is the place of obediently walking daily in the center of His will, giving everything you have to those you are called to as giving unto Jesus Himself.

Thank you for your steadfast prayers and shared joy in the faithfulness of God here in Haiti. His wonders and mercies and majesty never cease!

His and yours, with great joy,

Annie

I will bless the Lord at all times:

His praise shall continually be in my mouth. My soul shall make her boast in the Lord.

Psalm 34:1

A garden enclosed is my sister, my spouse, a spring shut up, a fountain sealed . . .

Song of Solomon 4:12

inthenextissue

Normal Christianity what it really means to put Jesus first Virtuous Femininity a warrior-poet speaks up Glorious Freedom letting go of fear, doubt, and self-pity

Soli Deo Gloria