SheMagazine—March'12

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C:\My Backup -- 09-02-11 1217PM\111shemag\Jan12\READY\shep03olivia2.cdr Thursday, December 29, 2011 3:01:51 PM


packed house for halcyon live at the sand bar during gasparilla weekend in tampa, fl.

the 4th annual explore/expo at the moore building in miami’s design district.

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director’s chair

Stress. We all have it. Anyone who tells you that don’t have it is either full of crap or full of large doses of medication. Work, love, friendships, family, money, dirty laundry piling up in the basket…all things that bring stress into our lives. I won’t lie to you. I’m on a tight deadline. Earlier today, my girl accidentally repeated something our kid told me in confidence to the absolute wrong person. My 70something year-old best friend keeps forgetting to put in her teeth and eat something. Seemingly every bill I have is due today. And I don’t have a clean pair of my favorite boxer briefs to sleep in tonight. So there. I think I know a thing or two about stress. In some states, I might even qualify as an expert witness. Duly sworn in, I can tell you that every single person I know, have known, will know or potentially stalk on Facebook has stress in their lives. It’s something that doesn’t discriminate based on race, gender, sexuality, age, social or financial status. Like poop, it just happens, and as the saying goes, “Acceptance is the first stage.” The key, of course, is not only in accepting that it will happen, but also, and more importantly, how we deal with it when it does. As your expert witness, I can tell you from experience that chain smoking or allowing yourself to remain sleepless for several days won’t help. The same can be said for taking it out on your girlfriend, wife, main squeeze or what have you. These things only exacerbate the problem and can lead to headaches, a much swifter path to the a host of diseases, a complete lack of focus or ability to operate heavy machinery, and well, a loss of a willing sexual partner for an unknown length of penance time. Trust me, I know. So, you have to find a productive means of dealing with stress. At the end of the day, there are many things which, no matter how hard you try, you cannot fix. Regardless of how many quarters a month you give, you will never be able to provide clean water and food to all the needy children or end animal abuse or sickness, no matter what Sally Struthers or Sarah McLachlan say. You can help, but you can’t fix it. Thus, you have to be able to take a step back and separate what you can from what you cannot change. What you can’t change, care enough about yourself to say the magic word, “Whatever.” Don’t allow yourself to become overwhelmed with trying to change things that are other sentient adult’s self-created problems. That’s not your job. The more you jump in and fix their mistakes, the more you enable them to just keep screwing up. For the stuff you can change, I pose the following old joke: How do you eat an elephant? [Insert you saying, “I don’t know. How?”] One bite at a time. Translation, you can’t do it all simultaneously. Pick one thing, take a deep breath and handle it. When that’s done, rinse and repeat. The process won’t be easy, but it will be easier if you just do one thing at a time. Like I said, I get it. There are times when no amount of meditation, medication or incantation can make the stress go away. You have to just deal with it one bite at a time. And now that I am done with this, I need to go pay some bills, remind my BFF to put in her teeth and wash my boxer briefs. See you next month.

Tina Sordellini Managing Executive Editor

MANAGING EXECUTIVE EDITOR Tina Sordellini PUBLICITY SHE ESPAÑOL EXECUTIVE EDITOR Maria Espinal ASSOCIATE EDITORS Marissa Cohen • Shawn Nicholson Christina Radish • Denise Warner CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Marissa Cohen • Verónica Espinal Christina Radish • The Village Sage Nadine Smith • Tina Sordellini Denise Warner • Donna Woessner CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS Verónica Espinal • Yadira Claralt Karina Luna • Angie Sowers Juan Saco Mironoff • Boi-Photography SALES ASSOCIATES Maria Espinal • Diana Price Portia Weiss ads@shemag.com DISTRIBUTION Robin Rotellini • Randy Justice SUBSCRIPTIONS www.shemag.com EDITORIAL OFFICE 6511 Nova Drive, #173 • Davie, FL 33317 954.354.9751 office info@shemag.com • www.shemag.com

SHE: WOMEN OWNED, WOMEN OPERATED, WOMEN EMPOWERED! The ideas and opinions expressed in She Magazine do not necessarily reflect opinions of Shemag, L.L.C., She Magazine, or of editors or staff. Publication of the name or photograph of any person or organization should not be construed as any indication of the sexual orientation of that person or organization. All advertising subject to approval by She Magazine. She Magazine/Shemag, L.L.C. is not responsible for unauthorized use or copyright infringement as present in camera ready, client provided ads, nor is it liable for any loss or suit arising from submitted advertisement, copy, photography, or artwork. Reproduction of She Magazine, in whole or in part, is strictly prohibited without the express written consent of Shemag, L.L.C.

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march 2012 / VOLUME 14 / ISSUE 2

IN THIS ISSUE

28

24 features

she espaÑol

16 CHEW ON THIS

38 NOTICIAS

A visit to Gaspar’s Grotto in Tampa, FL

17 HEALTH

Entérate lo que sucede en nuestros paises con nuestra comunidad.

Teeth Whitening

39 SOY MUJER

18 THE L PROJECT 24 COVER STORY

¿Enamorada del Amor?

Jane Lynch

photos

28 NCLR 35TH ANNIVERSARY Interview with Kate Kendell, Esq.

30 INFERNO PR FOR WOMEN Pack your bags, Puerto Rico is calling!

42 PRIDEFEST FORT LAUDERDALE

departments 06 10 14 20

DIRECTOR’S CHAIR MULTIMEDIA IN THE NEWS EQUALITY TALK

Gay married couples are refusing to lie

32 34 36 42 46

SHE GIRL PETS OF THE MONTH JUST 4 FUN ARCHIVES SCOPES

42

04 SHE SCENE 12 OLIVIA CRUISE 40 AQUA FOUNDATION The Aqua Ally Awards

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30

>> READ OUR FREE DIGITAL EDITION AT WWW.SHEMAG.COM

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MULTIMEDIA

with tina sordellini

This past November, Idina Menzel recorded her forthcoming PBS special Idina Live: Barefoot at the Symphony. On March 6th, she releases the DVD and accompanying album to the special.The special, and the album, were captured in Toronto at Koerner Hall. Menzel performs with the 52-piece Kitchener-Waterloo Symphony, one of Canada’s premiere symphony orchestras.

The stars, the drama, the glamour and the glitter are back! Dancing with the Stars returns for Season 14 on March 19 with a sensational two-hour season premiere. This season’s cast includes Melissa Gilbert, sassy Sherri Shepherd, Katherine Jenkins, sexy Maria Menudos, empress of soul Gladys Knight and tennis legend Martina Navratilova. Oh, and there are a few guys, too. Airs Mondays and Tuesdays at 8pm on ABC.

The new sci-fi action thriller Hunger Games, is set in a future where the Capitol selects a boy and girl from the twelve districts to fight to the death on live television, Katniss Everdeen volunteers to take her younger sister’s place for the latest match. Stars Jennifer Lawrence, Josh Hutcherson, Liam Hemsworth, Eliz-

After the best Superbowl halftime show in years, get ready for MDNA, the upcoming twelfth studio album Madonna set to be released on March 26. This will be Madonna’s first album not associated with Warner Bros. Records since 1982. The first single from the album, “Give Me All Your Luvin’” (featuring Nicki Minaj and M.I.A.) was released on February 3. The new album contains 11 more tracks including the second single “Girl Gone Wild.”

Elle Macpherson hosts the latest clothesdesigning series, but this one is in search of the next big brand. On Fashion Star, premiering March 13 at 9pm on NBC, designer John Varvatos, Jessica Simpson and Nicole Richie will serve as mentors to the 14 contestants. NBC and Fashion Star are trying something a little different and risky by making it possible for viewers to purchase the winning designs each week.

Those looking for a little comedy to go with their fairy tale fantasy will be thrilled to find Julia Roberts and Lily Collins on the big screen in the story of Snow White retold, Mirror Mirror. Julia stars as the evil queen who steals control of a kingdom and Lily as the exiled princess who enlists the help of seven resourceful rebels to win back her birthright. In theaters March 30.

abeth Banks. In theaters on March 23.

not to be missed: Comedy flick opening on March 9, Friends With Kids. Two best friends decide to have a child together while keeping their relationship platonic, so they can avoid the toll kids can take on romantic relationships. Stars: Jennifer Westfeldt, Adam Scott, Chris O’Dowd and Maya Rudolph.

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thousands of women on their way to the caribbean for a week-long vacation aboard an Olivia cruise, before departuring from tampa, fl. photos by boi photography / view more photos at www.shemag.com

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in the news The 4th Annual Miami Beach Women’s Conference celebrates women’s history month

Celebrate National Women’s History Month with Mayor Matti Herrera Bower at Miami Beach City Hall during the 4th Annual Miami Beach Women’s Conference to be held on Friday, March 16 at the Miami Beach City Hall, 1700 Convention Center Dr., 3rd Floor Commission Chambers, 8am-12pm. The annual March “Women’s History Month” Celebration is Free and Open to the Public. Produced by Women’s Exhibit, Inc., the conference will open with a continental breaskfast 8:30 – 9:30AM followed by 2 panels: A- “You’re Elected! Now What?” 9:30-10:30AM and B“Protection for Women” 11AM-12PM. Among this year’s panelist are Hon. Elaine Bloom, Senator Gwen Margolis, Commissioner Katy Sorenson, Hon. Katherine Fernandez Rundle and Beth Littrell, Esq. Directly after the Mayor’s Panel please join US Congresswoman Ileana Ros-Lehtinen; Honored Guest of the 4th Annual “Lunch in the Garden” Co-Hosted By Mayor Matti Herrera

Bower and Women’s Exhibit, Inc. showcasing the culinary talents of women, and a Silent Auction of great local deals at the newly renovated Miami Beach Botanical Garden adjacent to City Hall from 12:30-4 PM, $30 in advance or $35 at the door. Women’s Exhibit produced their first event January 28, 2008, hosting a panel of representatives of women’s community organizations throughout Miami-Dade County to commemorate Mayor Bower shattering of the glass ceiling; both as the city’s first woman mayor — but also as the first Hispanic Mayor of Miami Beach. Women’s Exhibit, Inc (WE) is a Florida notprofit corporation with a mission to exhibit women’s achievements of all ages and in all walks of life; by making available information, programs and facts about women’s accomplishments and educating today’s women into becoming a catalyst for the future. For more visit womensexhibit.com or 786.5529.6636.

“Legalize Gay” Documentary film set for national debut in May

CampusPride.org/LegalizeGay

“Legalize Gay: The Civil Rights Movement of a Generation,” a documentary film set to debut in May on LOGO, is currently making special, advanced screenings to LGBT and ally audiences across the country. Campus Pride and its student and young leaders are featured in the documentary, an incredibly inspiring film that captures the courage and conviction of a new generation of activists determined to close the deal on full equality for the LGBT community. “Campus Pride is already doing so much in the struggle for LGBT equality at universities and colleges across the country. I hope ‘Legalize Gay’ can help in that effort,” Hines said. “The young people in the film are so inspiring. Legalize Gay’ is not only thoughtprovoking and inspirational, but very entertaining,” said Campus Pride Executive Director Shane Windmeyer. Featured in the film is “Camp Pride,” an annual event sponsored by Campus Pride, aimed at giving a new generation of LGBT activists the skills and support they need to flourish at their universities and colleges. Visit them online for info on booking an advance screening,

lesbian Judge Won’t Perform Marriages for Straight Couples A gay Texas judge is refusing to conduct marriage ceremonies for straight couples, according to the New York Daily News. The judge, Tonya Parker, who is an African-American lesbian, said she will not officiate any straight couple marriages until gays and lesbians have the same rights in her state. Same-sex marriage is not legal in Texas. “I do not perform them because it is not an equal application of the law. Period,” she said, according to the Dallas Voice. According to Chapter 3 of the Texas Family Code, a county judge is among the judges and religious leaders allowed to perform marriages. They may conduct the ceremony. The term “may” is defined in the terminology section of the Texas Code of Judicial Conduct as a term that “denotes permissible discretion or, depending on the context, refers to action that is not covered by specific proscriptions.” At a monthly meeting for the Stonewall Democrats of Dallas, Parker spoke about her decision. “I use it as my opportunity to give them a lesson about marriage equality in the state because I feel like I have to tell them why I’m turning them away,” she told the Dallas Voice. “So, I usually will offer them something along the lines of, ‘I’m sorry. I don’t perform marriage ceremonies because we are in a state that does not have marriage equality, and until it does, I am not going to partially apply the law to one group of people that doesn’t apply to another group of people. “And it’s kind of oxymoronic for me to perform ceremonies that can’t be performed for me, so I’m not going to do it,” she told the Dallas Voice.

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with diana price

chew on this

GASPAR’S GROTTO

CUBAN FLAIR CUISINE

People call Ybor City, the “Gaybor District” because there are a multitude of gay business and gay friendly business owners all over the city. One of those businesses, Gaspar’s Grotto Restaurant and Bar, is owned by Gary and Shere Schiller. Built at the turn of the century, the normally raucous and rowdy Gaspar’s Grotto has evolved through many (mostly legal) uses, first as a furniture store, then an art gallery, carpet warehouse, pawnshop, and now a world-class bar. The extensive outdoor patio, which includes a stage, outdoor bar and numerous fountains, has its own history. Located at the corner of East. 7th Ave and Angel Oliva Senior St, this restaurant has everything from Cuban sandwiches to seafood. Live music plays on their outside patio and there is a full liquor and wine bar. There are also special events in the Sandbar and tons of old photos and pirate décor. Check out the Sunday Booze Cruise Brunch that has everything in the buffet from fresh seafood to steak and eggs and an unlimited amount of Mimosas. So next time you visit Tampa, Florida, make sure you go by and check out this amazing restaurant and bar, which hosts monthly LGBT events.

Executive Chef: The wildly great Darlene Herrick. Wine List: Short and sweet with incredible pricing. Signature Drink: The Gaspar’s Grog, built in a rocks glass with a sugar rim. muddled limes, coconut rum, and a splash of 7-Up. Most Popular Appetizers: Baked goat cheese, devil crab, guacamole Most Popular Dishes: Captain Ahab’s no-pea pea soup, Pirates’ seafood bowl, Cuban sandwiches. Most Popular Wine: Navarro Correas Malbec Most Popular Dessert: Creme Brulee What is Gaspar’s Grotto Best Known For? 
 Gaspar’s is well-known for the eclectic mix of customers. We cater to everyone and offer an atmosphere that is conducive to collegial conversation between groups of people and individuals who might not have these people in their inner circles. This makes for great fun and is the basis of the success of all the world’s great bar rooms. Happy Hour: Huge amount of specials ans best of all, the $2 shot and a beer. Entree Price Range: $12 to $20 Location & hours:
1805 E. 7th Ave. • Tampa, FL 33605 • Sun. - Sat.: 10:30AM 3AM • 813.248.5900 •gasparsgrotto.com

SHE - 16 - 03/12

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health

A Quick Q&A with Dr. Max Zaslavsky, DMD Is teeth whitening a cosmetic procedure fit for everyone?

Teeth whitening is definitely a cosmetic procedure that would be available to any patient who has natural front teeth. If your teeth are crowned, have fillings in them or are veneered, bleaching will not affect those teeth at all. Be aware that a tooth that may be dark due to a previous root canal will not bleach. Root canaled teeth can only be whitened by placing a restoration -like a full porcelain crown - over them. Is it possible to prevent stains or teeth discoloration?

Definitely. If you have to drink coffee, try drinking it from a straw or try to discontinue excessive use of certain beverages like colas. Does whitening toothpaste actually whiten teeth?

In my opinion, not really. I have never seen remarkable results because of toothpaste. I think the companies are marketing on abrasive compounds in toothpastes that can remove stains, but also wear away enamel at the same time. Bleaching, despite the urban legends, does not harm enamel, or any portion of your teeth. What’s the difference, if any, between bleaching and whitening? Do you have a professional preference?

There is no difference between bleaching and whitening. In our office we offer three different processes. We offer a 10-day bleaching kit with pre-filled trays. This is for touch ups on patients who are just a bit yellow. This is definitely not for the two-coffee cup a day person or the smoker. We offer a one-hour bleaching process. I highly recommend it if you are going to a wedding or bat mitzvah. It creates great results, but does not last very long. What I prefer is the bleaching tray process. We take custom molds of your mouth and fabricate trays that fit like a glove over your teeth. Then we provide you with 2-3 months worth of bleaching material that you can use daily. By capitalizing on a daily 3- minute bleaching exposure for a period of at least 1-2 months, you will have the best results in whitening your teeth. What are the risks that we should consider?

For bleaching it would be dental hypersensitivity. It is a bleach compound so your teeth may become sensitive to cold. Your gums can get a chemical burn if the material gets on them. If the thought of biting into a scoop of ice cream makes you cringe now, then bleaching may not be for you. Normally, however, we include a toothpaste like Sensodyne to help with hypersensitivity issues. What is the after-treatment maintenance like?

For any of the bleaching processes listed, maintenance is key. I recommend touch-ups around every six months for the average patient. If you are a smoker or you drink a lot of tea, coffee, or soda, I would suggest increasing your bleaching maintenance to every 3-4 months. SHE - 17 - 03/12

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BY DENISE WARNER / PHOTOS KATIE LAMB

feature

UK lesbian artists band together to combat homophobic bullying Living in London, England has made me aware of a few things: tiny houses, little nuggets called cars, cozy pubs on every corner, cold winters, and an absolutely thriving lesbian community. The music scene, in particular, is quite a large pool of talent- no matter what your taste is. Over the weekend of October 21, 2011, the UK’s leading lesbian artists got together at Dean Street Studios in Soho to record a single, “It Does Get Better” to help raise awareness and money for charities such as Stonewall and Diversity Role Models that work to combat homophobic teenage bullying. These gifted, talented musicians came together for a very personal and important cause: a massive LGBT Anti Bullying campaign called “The L Project”. The buzz was electric, the unity was strong, and the sense of something special was in the air. I’ve been following the project since the beginning and this past February, it all came together. “It Does Get Better” was released on February 11th as a digital download. Within 30 hours of its release, “It Does Get Better” by The L Project shot to #1 on iTunes UK’s Rock Album (4 tracks) download chart, and #1 on Amazon UK’s Rock and Folk Song download

chart. By mid-February they broke the ‘Official UK Independent Singles Chart’ at #11. Their Facebook group has blown up in just two weeks from 3,000 to over 13,000 Likes, and the video on YouTube has well over 65,000 views. Having recorded the recently released single “It Does Get Better” with the help of its kind sponsors, The L Project is gathering growing support from both gay and straight communities across the UK and beyond. “The enthusiasm is amazing!” says Georgey Payne, creator of The L Project and singer-songwriter for UK lesbian band Greymatter. “We’re finding that most people know of or have been affected by this issue, and just want to join in and help in whatever way they can. We’ve come a long way since June 2011.” Payne herself was moved to action by the experiences of a young gay friend: “I noticed one night he was worried about going home after work. When I asked him what was wrong, he told me he was being bullied at school. I listened while he explained everything that had been happening, and I just remember feeling so sad at what he was going through. Being a songwriter, the best way I could think of to help raise money and awareness to prevent

this kind of thing happening to others was to write a song. I asked the most talented UK lesbian artists I know for their help [in recording the song] for charity. They all said yes without hesitation.” Set to a powerful and catchy melody, the lyrics express the challenges of growing up gay, but the central message is one of hope: it gets better. This message is at the core of Stonewall’s “It Gets Better Today” campaign, as well as the “It Gets Better” Project” (USA). The Diversity Role Models charity also helps spread this message through their excellent school workshops. Both Diversity Role Models and Stonewall will benefit directly from all iTunes and Amazon single sales. Everyone involved, including artists, supporters and promoters, have done this for free. Participating artists are: Horse, Georgey Payne & Emma Kavanagh (Greymatter), Sofia Antonia Milone (GeEkgiRL), Sandra MacBeth, Amber Taylor-Groves (HeadsHearts), Mel Sanson (Kenelis), Nina McCann, O’Hooley & Tidow, Lorna Thomas, Leanna Goring, Juey, Jess Gardham, Amy Sutton (Neon Choir), Nicky Mitchell, and Ella Chambers. For more on The L Project, visit them online at ww.thel-project.com

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SHE - 19 - 03/12

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BY NADINE SMITH

equality talk

“We will no longer participate in the government’s erasure of our relationship and our marriage...”

A movement is building across the country as more and more gay people get legally married in the U.S. or abroad. Whether on tax returns or customs forms, in the muddle of contradictory, nonsensical, and infuriating laws, married gay couples are refusing to identify as “single.” Quietly, from California to New York, from Alaska to Florida, couples are refusing to deny their spouses and are willing to enter legally murky territory to take a stand. A website called RefuseToLie.org has become a gathering place for gay couples to share their stories and for others to speak out in solidarity. While many couples post that they have chosen to file as married, the site also provides tax tips for those who wish to protest but don’t want to risk running afoul of the IRS. Research shows that gay people on average pay nearly $500,000 more over a lifetime due to discriminatory laws. A recent CNN Money study concluded that same-sex couples are paying as much as $6,000 more in annual federal income taxes than other married couples, even in states that recognize their unions. For example, married couples filing jointly who sell a home can exclude from taxation up to $500,000 of the income received. Gay couples are only allowed to exclude

$250,000, the same as single filers. Given these disparities, how many times has bigotry cost gay families a home in a safer neighborhood, a college education for their children, or the startup money for a business? But the Refuse to Lie movement is not spurred by gay couples looking for a bigger refund. In some cases, filing as married has been more costly, but the principle was worth it. Last year Kate Kendell of the National Center for Lesbian Rights and her wife paid roughly $5,000 more to declare herself married and the parent to her children. On RefuseToLie.org she writes: “Sandy and I do our very best to raise our kids to live with integrity, power in the world and openness to what is possible. The core values we try to instill in [our children] are compromised every time we deny who Sandy and I are to each other and every time we diminish what we mean to each other. We will no longer participate in the government’s erasure of our relationship and our marriage. For us, refusing to lie on our taxes is a straightforward, and pretty minor way to demonstrate that courage ourselves.” Discrimination at tax time is as hidden as it is widespread. For many straight people, the

inequity in tax law comes as shocking news. “I am a straight single man and I am outraged that my government does this. I will stand with you any way I can,” wrote Josh. The Refuse to Lie movement ideally isn’t restricted to filing taxes. Increasingly, gay couples are pushing back against customs agents who require them to fill out separate forms rather than recognize them as family. A Canadian couple made news last year when they encountered this on a visit to the U.S.,but such shabby treatment isn’t reserved for foreign travelers. Rudy Molinet, a Key West real estate broker, and his spouse Harry Hoehn were confronted by a customs agent as they returned from France at George Bush Intercontinental Airport in Houston. On his personal blog, Rudy writes: “When Harry and I approached the customs officer to enter, we walked up together as did every other married couple in line. I was ordered to “get back in line, only families can come up here together”. “This was my lunch counter moment. I calmly told the immigration officer that Harry was my husband and that I would not get back in line. He became confrontational. “We don’t recognize your marriage, you are not a family

SHE - 20 - 03/12

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unit under the law, and I order you to get back in line,” he barked. “I refused. I took a stand. I told the officer, “I am not a second-class citizen, I am an American citizen, and the only way I will go to the back of the bus is if you arrest me and put me there.” He was armed with a gun; I was armed with a greater weapon: the Constitution of the United States. He backed off, begrudgingly letting me go through immigration with my husband -- just like every other couple.” But the murky legal landscape may be tilting in favor of equal rights for gay married couples. In a memo on RefuseToLie.org, Patricia Cain, a professor at Santa Clara Law and a national expert in federal tax law and sexuality and the law, writes: “Tax advisers in the past have warned same-sex married couples not to file as married (either jointly or separately) because of the possible imposition of penalties for doing so. The recent litigation attacking DOMA has led some to question whether joint filing might be a reasonable position, despite President Obama’s pronouncement that agencies should continue to enforce DOMA. In other words, if the Attorney General of the United States has taken the position that DOMA is unconstitutional, why shouldn’t taxpayers be allowed to rely on that opinion and file as though DOMA were not in force?” My wife and I will once again file as married. We have a 9-month-old son, and we know that our actions will teach him more than our words ever could. How can we raise him to have integrity in his dealings with other people but fill out forms that deny our existence as a family?

* Tips for Gay Couples Considering Filing As Married If you are a gay couple, legally married in a state or country that performs such marriages, can you file your federal income tax return as married even if the federal government refuses to acknowledge your marriage?

General Answer: Because the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) defines marriage for federal tax purposes as excluding same-sex couples, only opposite-sex couples can file as married. Should you file jointly?

That is up to you and your personal tax adviser.

Can you do so without penalty?

Yes, if by filing jointly you do not reduce your tax liability. How can you affirm your marital status, object to DOMA, file a joint return, and not be subject to penalties? Here are the safest possibilities:

1. File two single returns (including the attachment affirming the marriage) and then file an amended return, filing jointly. The amended return is a 1040X. This is what the plaintiffs in the GLAD case did. Once the IRS rejects the amended return, or if six months passes and they do nothing, the taxpayers who file an amended return have the right to file suit in federal district court claiming the refund. The basis of the claim for refund is that you are legally married in the state of your marriage, that the federal government should recognize that marriage, and that DOMA is unconstitutional. This option would avoid penalties because your original return would be filed according to the statute. 2. File a joint return with the Form 8275 disclosing your position. Couples should consult with their tax return professionals before doing this because if the IRS refuses to accept the return you will have to respond to their inquiries. 3. You might consider filing a separate return as single and then filing a protective claim using I.R.S. Form 843. (File separate returns in accordance with the law, then attach the form to an amended joint return). If you know that you will benefit from filing jointly and you want to file jointly for every year possible (in the event DOMA is eventually struck down by the US Supreme Court) then you might want to consider this option. Why? Because there is a three year statute of limitations for amended tax returns. If DOMA is struck down in 2014, for example, and assuming the decision striking it down is retroactive, you would only have the three year period to file amended tax returns as a married couple filing jointly. If the statute of limitations means that you can only amend for years 2013, 2012, and 2011, now might be the time to think about filing a protective claim for 2010 and 2009 because those years are still open. Again, consult your tax professional for advice about this. *Source: refusetolie.org

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From Two and A Half Men to The L Word, it seems there isn’t a TV show that Jane Lynch hasn’t been on in the last decade. Lynch proves –as one of the hardest working actresses in Hollywood–that being an out lesbian doesn’t interfere with talent. This year Jane Lynch gets honored by the NCLR and for a very good reason—she isn’t just about rockin’ a track suit on Glee. Anyone who’s been following your career knows that you’ve been working pretty much non-stop since Christopher Guest’s Best in Show, with roles in 40-Year Old Virgin, numerous guest appearances in Two and a Half Men as Charlie’s ball busting therapist, Role Models with Paul Rudd, Julie/Julia, a stint on The L Word, and then along came Glee. Is there a sense of relief (or peace) that comes with getting a steady, solid lead role in a successful sitcom?

I actually do feel like I can breathe. However, I wish I knew that “every little thing is gonna be alright” feeling back when I was full of anxiety, fearing I’d never get work and every job I did get could be my last. On the plus side, that kind of

drive can make one resilient and resourceful. I like that part of me! In your autobiography, Happy Accidents, you note that you went through a desperately insecure period in your youth. What draws someone filled with insecurities to choose a career spent in front of cameras entertaining millions of people?

It’s the great mystery, isn’t it? And that I’d choose improvisation, the creative equivalent of jumping off a cliff, to be the world I live in! When I connected the dots that my insecurities and fears are actually the very tools I would need to create characters, the fear diminished and the work became more profound for me. You’ve always been an out actress in Hollywood- what are your thoughts on actors who don’t come out for fear of being stereotyped, or harming their chances of getting work? Is there still a homophobic attitude behind the scenes in the movie industry?

Whether or not anyone comes out is none of anyone’s business. I can only speak for myself. It was empowering for me to walk through life without any secrets. I experience no homophobia in Hollywood. I’m also not looking for it! I

know it exists elsewhere, and it’s making gay kids scared to death. I hope my life can inspire hope and be an example for those kids. I can’t think of too many TV shows you haven’t been on, but can you tell us what your initial reaction was when you read the script for Glee or met with Ryan Murphy and learned about this new TV series that would involve a whole lot of singing and dancing? Did you have any reservations?

I had no reservations taking Glee. First of all, Ryan Murphy is a genius. I’m the luckiest girl alive that he set his sights on me. Secondly, I can’t remember ever having reservations on whether or not to take work! After The L Word finished, there seemed to be such a lack of lesbians on TV. Do you feel like Glee is helping us get back on track, and making it okay again to see lesbian characters in our living rooms?

I think more gay characters on TV are inevitable and if Glee has anything to do with this, we will all be very happy. With such stellar credits in movies and television and now a bestselling author, you’re still a force in the fight

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for equality and LGBT rights. Is it hard to balance a career with being an activist?

I love being a part of and a face of this movement. I’m glad we help so many kids. Of course I can’t dance at everyone’s party, so I have picked and chose [certain] events and organizations. You are being honored by the NCLR this May in San Francisco, which also marks the NCLR’s 35th anniversary. What was your reaction upon hearing the news?

I love Kate Kendell. I love the selflessness and generosity of NCLR. NCLR stepped up and successfully represented my wife in her custody battle. I should be honoring them. As we celebrate Women’s History Month this March, who are your female role models and are there certain women who have made a difference in your personal life and career?

I’m inspired by many women. Most from afar: Jennifer Saunders, Byron Katie, Dr. Christiane Northrup, Dr. Nicki Monte. [I’m inspired by] women from different walks and worlds but who all stand lovingly, firm and passionately in their lives. With the amazing success of Glee, what would you like people to know about Sue Sylvester besides the fact that she can rock a track suit?

Sue Sylvester is a warrior who loses herself to the dark side most days. But when she is fighting for good, you will know no better advocate. It is such a huge honor to host the Emmy Awards this year. What was that like for you? Do you get star struck at all anymore?

I try not to be star struck with anyone. I try to get over it immediately. It feels bad in my body! It’s boring, useless and tedious for the person I’m star struck with. I remember, in 2008, I met you briefly in L.A. at an after party for the premiere of Itty Bitty Titty Committee, and I felt incredibly short. I’m kidding! I was in awe, seriously. What do you hope most people come away feeling after they’ve worked with Jane Lynch?

That we were there for each other. Period. Wife, mother, actress, advocate. What’s the best thing about your life at this very moment?

WHEN I CONNECTED THE DOTS THAT MY INSECURITIES AND FEARS ARE ACTUALLY THE VERY TOOLS I WOULD NEED TO CREATE CHARACTERS, THE FEAR DIMINISHED AND THE WORK BECAME MORE PROFOUND FOR ME.”

The best things right now in my life are our new house and our puppy Francis.

cover story

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BY DENISE WARNER / PHOTOS byTrishTunneyPhotography

feature

“...I CANNOT THINK OF ANYTHING I WOULD RATHER BE DOING. I LOVE MY LIFE. THAT IS WHAT KEEPS ME GOING.”

You've probably seen her name a million times before. You’re probably seen it on a NCLR booth at a pride event, or seen it splashed across a tent or an ad. Chances are you’ve attended a fundraiser or made a donation to NCLR. What does it even stand for? It stands for you, for the rights you and I deserve. This year, the National Center for Lesbian Rights is celebrating its 35th Anniversary, and it's time we all got onboard and learned more about this organization’s history and achievements. At their upcoming gala, NCLR will honor our cover girl, Jane Lynch with the Vanguard Award and six students from Minnesota’s Anoka-Hennepin School District with the Courage Award: Damian, Dylon, Ebonie, Kyle, Lane, and Jane Doe. We recently spoke to NCLR’s Executive Director, Kate Kendell, as they get ready to celebrate at the San Francisco’s City View at Metreon. This year marks the 35th Anniversary of the NCLR, where you serve as the Executive Director. Looking back at your career, you were the first staff attorney for the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) of Utah, then moved onto The National Center for Lesbian Rights in 1994, before accepting your position as Executive Director in 1996. You certainly haven't backed away from fighting the tough fights! What drew you into law in the first place?

I wanted to be a lawyer since I was a teenager. I’m not entirely sure why. No one in my immediate family was a lawyer; in fact I was one of the first in many generations to go to college, but I grew up seeing lawyers do great things. One day some Time/Life book about the law came to

the house and I ate it up. In high school we read To Kill a Mockingbird. Between that book and high school debate, the die was cast. With so many different spotlights in the media—marriage equality rights, anti-bullying laws, LGBT family laws—how do you decide where to put the most efforts?

They all seem so important! One thing we don’t do is try to decide which is most important. We care equally about all these issues. If a key case can move forward or if we can achieve a good policy change, we go for it. I would never ask you to name just one, but what have been some of the special highlights or accomplishments of the NCLR over the past 35 years?

There are some cases that really stand out: the Mary Ward case, the Sharon Smith case, the Michael Kanteras case, and the California marriage case. Our lawsuit now against the Anoka-Hennepin School District will be unforgettable. What's your best advice for someone who wants to help the NCLR in ways other than just writing out a donation check?

I would not want to discount how important financial support is. If we did not have donors—many of them in Florida-who supported our work, we could not do what we do. But folks can also be ambassadors, know about us, and spread the word. Be your own mini-gay activist by writing and talking to friends and family about why LGBT rights are important. Already, 2012 has proved to be a roller coaster. How difficult is it to keep your emotions in check when just about every bit of news has the possibility of being so deeply personal, as a woman, a lesbian, a mother, and a lawyer?

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at rallies and fundraisers. What do you feel is the key to a great speech? What motivates our community the most?

I know how the story ends. Despite any setbacks, we are moving, always, in the right direction. Things are better now than even five years ago. Five years from now this country will be more inclusive and supportive. We are trending in only one direction—and it’s good.

I am very happy and comfortable in front of a mike. For me the key is to talk about what you know and what you love—if you bring passion to your speaking, you will always do great.

Your family must be so proud of what you do. How involved are they in your work?

Now that we celebrate Women's History Month in March, who were your heroes or female role models growing up?

I could not do this work without the unfailing support of my spouse Sandy. For 18 years she has put up with me, no easy feat, I’m telling you! My oldest child is Emily, 30, from my previous relationship. She is now a very good friend and source of support. Sandy and I have two kids: Julian is 15 and Ariana is 10. They are both activists in their own way. Julian is a really loving and fun young man with a very deep sense of justice; Ariana is a fierce kid who wants everyone to be happy. They are so much fun. My favorite time is when I am with my family.

My mom who I miss every day, my 7th grade current events teacher Mrs. Miller, and my high school debate coach Mr. Hadley. If it hadn’t been for all of them, I could have gotten into some serious trouble. What kind of goals does the NCLR have planned in the future?

To keep doing what we are doing—but more and better. We want to always amplify our profile and to really make clear the connection between LGBT issues and all the issues that stigmatize people. Our struggles are linked and we have to appreciate that fact.

This May, the NCLR is honoring seven heroes, including Jane Lynch, for their awareness and activism. Tell us how you choose and what you look for in an NCLR Hero.

We always love to honor a community leader or icon and Jane Lynch is already a legend. She is so talented and so hilarious and sharp; it is a joy to watch her. She also is one of the most generous and lovely people on the planet. Seriously, she is one of a kind fabulous. Our six client honorees are the kids in our lawsuit against the Anoka-Hennepin School District. They define courage. That defines a hero to me, uncommon courage and telling the truth. There are so many uphill battles in your profession. It's nothing short of exhausting. Have there ever been moments where you wished you would have picked a different career? What keeps you so positive and headstrong?

Honestly, I feel so honored every day to do this work. I get back whatever I give ten-fold. I cannot believe my good fortune to be doing what I am. Other than being a kickass rocker (which would be impossible since I have no musical talent), I cannot think of anything I would rather be doing. I love my life. That is what keeps me going. If you could pick your next media platform and interview, what would you pick? Is there any publication, print, blog, radio, etc. you haven't been on yet that you think would be ideal?

NLCR hosts different events in Florida. One of the biggest events is coming up in Orlando, Girls in Wonderland. Can you give us an idea of how much has been raised over the years and how those funds have helped our community?

I would die to be on Rachel Maddow. But if it ever happens, I would faint, so it would not be such a good interview. I would also cut off my pinky to do Jon Stewart. I love him. You have always been so hands-on with the NCLR. You’re a part of the day-today goings-on, whether in the office, on the road, in the media, in court, or financially, like a one-woman show! How do you take care of yourself physically and mentally with such a demanding role?

Oh gosh, this is no one-woman show. I have an incredible staff of very talented people who do so much of the work that garners us the victories or the press. My staff is beyond awesome. NCLR also has a terrific Board who support our staff and me. I have a ton of help. I love to cook, ride my bike (no motor), and hang with my family. You've been known to really speak out

We have been coming to Florida every year since 1995. I love it there and we have a great group of supporters. Between our own events and events like Girls in Wonderland, we have raised over $250K over the last 10 years or so. This support allows us to take cases—we have had a key case in Florida almost every year, to educate the community through our partnership with family law attorneys, and to fight for policy changes and the passage of non-discrimination laws in various jurisdictions. What's the best way for our readers to jump right in and get involved with the NCLR?

Go to our website www.nclrights.org, make a donation if you can, follow us on Facebook and Twitter, send us your thoughts about what we are doing, and stand up for yourself and the issues you care about!

NCLR 35th ANNIVERSARY CELEBRATION Saturday, May 5, 2012 8pm to midnight City View at Metreon San Francisco, California purchase tickets at nclrights.org

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by y. herrera

feature

Inferno Puerto Rico

WOMEN purgatory to paradise • may 24 - 28

Want to dance among hot women on the sandy beaches of a tropical island? That dream is merely a phone call or mouse click away, thanks to Inferno Puerto Rico. Produced by Worldwide Travel Partners, Inferno Puerto Rico is a celebration of life, where the young and sexy can come together. This event offers various events during the Memorial Day weekend. Inferno Puerto Rico includes cultural tours of Old San Juan and El Yunque (Puerto Rico’s natural rain forest), award recognition for various supporters of the LGBT community in Puerto Rico, and club and shopping events. First time visitors can experience all that Puerto Rican culture has to offer. Worldwide Travel Partners offers all their guests complete travel packages, including airfare, hotel accommodations, and event passes. Last year’s event received the support of Puerto Rico’s government and supporters of the LGBT community. The Department of Tourism reached out to Worldwide Travel Partners in an effort to bring more tourists to the already popular area of Condado in the city of San Juan. The National Gay and Lesbian Task Force (NGLTF) offered political support to the small but growing LGBT community of Puerto Rico. As the word spread, major local celebrities began to support this historic event. The icing on the cake came when celebrity DJ/Producer Tracy Young and European hit Lisa M joined the line-up of Inferno Puerto Rico. Thanks to an amazing lineup, the support of Puerto Rico, and the hard work of Worldwide Travel Partners, Inferno Puerto Rico’s popularity came as no surprise. 2012’s Inferno Puerto Rico promises a better lineup, more events (including a hot body contest and a fashion show), and a larger international audience. International DJ/Producer Theresa, known for her energetic tribal beats, joins the Inferno Puerto Rico cast of world re-

nowned DJs, including Hector Fonseca, Angel X, Eddie Martinez and Lisa M. (Yup! She’s back again!). Inferno Puerto Rico will also revisit El Yunque, the historic city of Old San Juan, and swing by the Bacardi Rum Factory. The beaches of Puerto Rico will be filled with some of the hottest women from around the world, so don’t miss out on this fantastic event. With the help of the NGLTF, other major events around the world have offered promotional support. Winter Party Festival (Miami) and Circuit Festival (Spain) have lent their support to make Inferno Puerto Rico truly international.

OFFICIAL EVENTS Thursday, May 24:

• Purgatory Black Friday (Kick-off Party) Friday, May 25:

• Inferno Adventures (exclusive tours: El Yunque Rainforest Tour or the Old San Juan & Rum Distillery Tour) • Judgement Day (Dance Party) Saturday, May 26:

• Paradise Pool Party (at Conrad Hotel) • Disco Inferno (Signature Event) Sunday, May 27: • Genesis Beach (Condado region)

• Exodus White Party (Closing Party) www.InfernoPRWomen.com

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SHE GIRL

DREAM GIRL: I already have her. DREAM JOB: Astrological physicist MY OCCUPATION: Bartender at Score MY PETS: Two Italian Greyhounds and one Min Pin. MY MOTHER THINKS I: am special. She is a very proud mom. TURN-ONS: Confidence, assertiveness, humor, and spontaneity. TURN-OFFS: Needy, careless, passive-aggressive women. SENSITIVE BODY PARTS: Neck and waist. MY BEST QUALITY: My temperament and patience. SECRET FETISH: No comment. I HAVE A WEAKNESS FOR: cream and bad television. I LIKE TO WEAR: Nothing I FIRST KISSED A GIRL AT THE AGE OF: 16. IF YOU COULD HAVE ONE SUPER POWER, WHAT WOULD IT BE AND WHY?: really just want to fly. YOUR HOUSE IS ON FIRE, BESIDES A LOVED ONE, WHAT IS THE INANIMATE OBJECT YOU’D GRAB?: Dogs and my iPhone. WHAT BREAKFAST CEREAL BEST DESCRIBES YOU?: I’m cuckoo

for cocoa puffs. IF YOU COULD CHANGE YOUR NAME, WHAT WOULD YOU PICK?: Jo. THE LAST BOOK I READ WAS: The Speed Queen...again. THE LAST THING I OUT ON MY IPOD WAS: Lykki Li’s Wounded

Rhymes. IF MY LIFE WERE MADE INTO A MOVIE, MY PART WILL BE PLAYED BY: Noomi Rapace. MY GREATEST ACCOMPLISHMENT: Independently and making a

Gabrie, Miami Beach

life for myself. MY MOST MEMORABLE DATE: A gorgeous evening by the ocean. CELEBRITY’S BUTT I WOULD MOST LIKE TO SQUEEZE: Mila

Kunis. THE CARTOON CHARACTER I AM MOST LIKE: Daffy Duck. THE STRANGEST PLACE I’VE EVER BEEN NAKED: On stage at

the Vlada Lounge. THE WEIRDEST THING I EVER ATE WAS: My family is Southern.

We eat a lot of strange things. MY FAVORITE FLOWER: Tiger Lily. I JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS. THE FIRST THING I AM GOING TO BUY IS: A house for my mommy. MY FAVORITE TV SHOW: How The Universe Works. FRENCH FRIES, FRENCH VANILLA, FRENCH TOAST OR FRENCH MANICURE?: French fries all the way. IF I COULD HAVE ONE WISH GRANTED, I WOULD WISH:

Safety and happiness for my family. THE LAST MOVIE I WENT TO A THEATER TO SEE WAS: The Tree

of Life MY COMING OUT WAS: Interesting, yet easy. IF YOU WERE TO BECOME AN ACTIVIST IN THE LGBT COM-

“All that glitters is not gold.”

AND WHY: I would support the anti-bullying campaign because I believe everyone should live their lives in a safe and supported environment, free from fear. I THINK OUR COMMUNITY NEEDS: : Less drama and animosity to work together for equality.

photos by angie sowers

MUNITY, WHICH ORGANIZATION WOULD YOU CHOOSE

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Send your pet photos for consideration to info@shemag.com.

pets of the month

DUKE / 3 1/2 YRS OLD Breed: Golden Retriever Turn ons: Tennis Balls, Frisbees, Dog Beach, Car Rides W/ The Win-

1. Reduction of skin ailments and allergies. Organic pet food can give your pet the best chance to combat skin infections and allergies. It is free of artificial colors and flavor enhancers, chemical additives, and toxic pesticides that could be the source of your pet’s allergies. Organic pet food contains quality protein and grain sources of exceptional nutritional value. This supports your pet’s immune system, which in turn can help build resistance to skin infections. 2. More energy and a healthy weight. Many owners say their pets eat less organic pet food than non-organic brands because it is more nutritious,. Organic food doesn’t contain bulk-fillers, so your pet consumes only what it needs to maintain healthy energy levels and life functions. Pets feel more satiated eating smaller amounts of tasty, nutrient-dense foods. An organic diet can also help your pet lose weight and exercise more. 3. Fewer digestive disorders. Easily digestible oats, barley or other natural whole grains, and human-grade turkey, lamb, or chicken make a tremendous difference to your pet’s digestive system. Rather than consuming corn or other bulk fillers and chemical additives, your pet will ingest only what it needs for healthy metabolic functioning. Pets eat and eliminate less when they are on an organic diet.

dows Down, Bath Time and Squirrels. Turn offs: Closed Car Windows, Commands and Dog Food. I am Special Because: I am living proof that dogs can really be a hu-

man’s best friend! I think my Vet is: The Devil (until she gives me a treat) My Mom doesn’t know I: Have a rock fetish In My Next Life, I want to Be: A Major League Eater!

5

Great Reasons To

GO ORGANIC For Your Pet

4. Better overall health and stronger immunity. Organic pet

KIWI / 13 YRS OLD Breed: Tortishell Calico Turn ons: Quiet time, cream cheese Turn offs: My brother, well..boys in general I am Special Because: I know when my Mom is happy and sad. I think my Vet is: Kinda cute, but lacks a sense of fashion. My Mom doesn’t know I: Secretly beat the crap out of her ex-girl-

friend’s Chihuahua. In My Next Life, I want to Be: Cast as the lead in Legally Blonde 3.

food provides better quality sources of nutritional substances than the premium brands. It is more digestible for pets. Because organic pet food is more digestible, pets are likely to absorb more of the nutrients they require to maintain a healthy immune system. Boosting your pet’s immunity may help prevent costly infections and illnesses that require veterinarian care. 5. Quality of Life and Longevity. What you feed your pet will have a direct impact on how they look, feel, and act. By feeding your pet organic food, you can help ensure your pet lives a long, happy, and healthy life. A luxurious, shiny coat, more energy, a healthy weight, and a strong immune system can maximize your pet’s life expectancy and quality of life.

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with material girl

just 4 fun

Broadway

Anyone?

I have been waiting for years to get a chance to see Evita on Broadway and my time to sing along (in my head) to every tune is almost here. The musical stars Award-winning Argentinean actress, Elena Roger, making her Broadway debut as Eva Perón, world-renowned music artist, Ricky Martin, as Che and Tony Awardwinner, Michael Cerveris as Juan Perón. Evita begins previews on March 12 and Opening Night is set for April 5, 2012. So plan a weekend in NYC and head to Broadway. Tickets range from $67-$142, and are on sale now. Purchase online at Ticketmaster.com, by phone at 1-800-745-3000, or at the Marquis Theatre Box Office. WWW.EVITAONBROADWAY.COM

MOVES TO LAS VEGAS For the last 22 years, Girl Bar’s Dinah Shore weekend has taken place in Palm Springs, CA. But this year, it’s time for a change as the unforgettable weekend moves to Las Vegas! Girl Bar and Fuse Events have joined forces for this year’s Dinah Shore Weekend, taking place during the weekend of April 27-29! They’ve put together an unforgettable weekend of lesbian events in Las Vegas for Girl Bar Dinah Shore Weekend Las Vegas 2012. Since last year, Girl Bar and Fuse Events have been working exclusively with Caesars Entertainment to create the ultimate women’s weekend experience featuring all the best that Caesars Entertainment properties have to offer. Official events and hotels for Dinah Shore Weekend include Planet Hollywood and Flamingo hotels. “Our sophisticated ladies wanted bigger, better and more in a city that never sleeps. [We’re offering a] 24/7 package of perks, food, beverages and entertainment where there are no last calls and our exclusive GO Pool at the Flamingo is au naturel. The LGBT market makes up such an important part of Caesars worldwide customer base,” said Richard Brower, Director of LGBT Marketing at Caesars Entertainment Corporation. “Having this legendary weekend move to Vegas was an opportunity we could not afford to miss.” For information on host hotels, packages, weekend passes and single tickets visit them online at WWW.DINAHSHOREWEEKEND.COM

BORN:

January 31, 1974 in Fredericton, New Brunswick WHAT:

Actress BEST KNOWN FOR:

Playing the bitterly angry flight attendant trying to quit smoking in the NicoDerm Patch TV commercial and as Cassidy Holland on Being Erica RECENTLY SPOTTED:

Starring as super-sexy succubus, Bo Jones, on Lost Girl FIND HER:

www.annasilk.com

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noticias LA CIUDAD DE BUENOS AIRES INSCRIBIRÁ A HIJOS DE MATRIMONIOS IGUALITARIOS Tras denuncias de 100% Diversidad y Derechos y Lesmadres, el nuevo subsecretario de justicia de la Ciudad de Buenos Aires, Javier Bujan, instruyó al Registro Civil a inscribir a los hijos e hijas de matrimonios integrados por dos mujeres con el primer apellido de cualquiera de las conyugues, agregando seguidamente el otro sin hacer distinciones discriminatorias. Así la Ciudad de Buenos Aires se pone en sintonía con el resto de las provincias que se adecuan a la ley de matrimonio igualitario. La Resolución 038/12 instruye al Registro Civil a que en lo sucesivo “admita y proceda a la inscripción de niños/as, cuyos progenitores resulten ser del mismo sexo respetando los términos de la ley 26.618, evitando adicionar constancia lesivas o discriminatorias. 131Las organizaciones destacan que esta iniciativa resulta un gran avance y presentarán en las próximos días, una solicitud para que se adecuen las partidas de nacimiento que fueron confeccionadas desde la sanción de la ley de matrimonio igualitario pero anteriores a esta Resolución.

ORGANIZACIONES APOYAN PROYECTO CONTRA DISCRIMINACIÓN EN BOGOTÁ La directora de la Fundación Familiares y Amigos Unidos por la Diversidad Sexual (Fundauds), Gloria Ruiz debió afrontar que su hijo fuera discriminado por su orientación sexual, aseguró además que esta situación se presenta en muchas ocasiones por la desinformación que manejan los mismos profesores. La Defensoría del Pueblo señala que además existe en los colegios la discriminación para los campesinos y la población desplazada que llega a la ciudad, así lo dijo Pilar Rueda, Defensora Delegada para los derechos de la niñez, quien aseguró que la implementación de estos programas es una obligación del Gobierno.

Las organizaciones sociales, recibieron con beneplácito y gran expectativa el anuncio del Distrito, donde la Secretaria de Educación busca erradicar en las escuelas públicas todo tipo de discriminación.

LA MAYORÍA DE LA POBLACIÓN DE COSTA RICA APOYA A LA DIVERSIDAD SEXUAL El diario latinoamericano La Nación ha encargado un estudio a la compañía Unimer para conocer el apoyo de la ciudadanía de Costa Rica a los derechos de la población de lesbianas, gays, transexuales y bisexuales del país. El diario ha dado a conocer ahora los resultados del estudio, el cual ha contado con la participación de 1.200 personas que fueron entrevistadas entre los días 4 y 10 de enero de este año 2012. Los resultados del estudio han dado a conocer que la mayoría de la población de Costa Rica, un 53%, está a favor de que la clase política lleve a cabo el reconocimiento de los derechos de la diversidad sexual. En un porcentaje menor, pero aún elevado, se encuentra el 41% de los ciudadanos que se oponen a leyes que igualen los derechos de la diversidad sexual, mientras que un 4% de la

ciudadanía no tiene una opinión al respecto. El apoyo ciudadano al reconocimiento de los derechos de la comunidad LGTB en Costa Rica cuenta con un mayor apoyo entre la población comprendida entre los 18 y los 39 años, sector en el que la igualdad de la diversidad sexual cuenta con 60%.

GOLPIZA Y MUERTE A PAREJA GAY EN LEON, NICARAGUA Frente a su casa fue asesinado de varios garrotazos el joven Eddy Napoleón Ramírez Novoa, de 27 años. Los presuntos implicados en el crimen son los hermanos Milton Rafael (36), alias “Payo”; José Ramón (32) y Oscar García López (25). De igual manera Julio César Largaespada, quien era pareja de la víctima, resultó golpeado y fue trasladado al hospital local. Según Largaespada, los hermanos García López empezaron a ofender a la víctima diciéndole que era un “cochón” y posteriormente iniciaron una riña. Los hermanos se armaron de palos y empezaron a golpear a Ramírez en la cabeza, hasta desprenderle uno de los ojos. Horas más tarde falleció en el Hospital de León. “Desde hace un año veníamos denunciando ante las autoridades de la Policía de León esta situación, a tal punto que fue llevado el caso a los Tribunales de Justicia, sin embargo la fiscal Flor de María Rostrán nunca atendió el caso, hasta que se dio la tragedia”, dijo Largaespada. “Recuerdo que cuando estaban golpeando a Eddy hice más de cinco llamadas a la delegación policial del reparto Rubén Darío y el oficial que me atendió me dijo que no quería tener problema, hasta que me mataron a Eddy”, expresó el sobreviviente. Miguel Carmona, jefe de Auxilio Judicial de la Policía de León, informó que tras el suceso lograron capturar a José Ramón y a Oscar García López, presuntos autores del homicidio. Luego de practicarle la autopsia a Rodríguez el médico forense Xavier Lara, del Instituto de Medicina Legal, dijo que la víctima tenía varias fracturas en el rostro y en el cráneo. Nicaragua fue uno de los países de Latinoamérica que mantenía la homosexualidad como delito y castigaba la sodomía bajo penas de 1 a 3 años de cárcel. En la actualidad, la nueva redacción del código penal nicaragüense, que entró en vigor en marzo de 2008, ya no considera ilegal la homosexualidad en este país. La tolerancia y discriminación, es otro punto.

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por veronica espinal

soy mujer

¿Enamorada del

AMOR?

Aunque nunca me he regido por ellos, en ocasiones son lo primero que busco cuando tomo una revista o un periódico. Hace días leí mi horóscopo, el mismo que su traducción decía: “‘No todo lo que brilla es oro’ puede ser una idea inteligente que tener en mente si es que conoces a una persona con prospecto amoroso. Podrías estar enamorada del amor y eso no te deja ver a los demás por lo que realmente son”. Estas palabras, que en cualquier otro momento no significarían nada, se quedaron grabadas en mi mente por varios días. Pensaba en todas y en ninguna. Aunque no era necesario, buscaba leer entre líneas el mensaje “escondido” que parecía estar más claro que el agua. Estas palabras, en este momento, parecían encajar con esa parte romántica y emocional que vivo intensamente. Esas palabras impresas en un papel periódico me llegaron fuerte y me costó unos 4-5 días mandarlas al diablo y ponerlas de lado. Dentro de mi claridad, me invadieron de mucha confusión. Que yo recuerde, nunca antes había sentido tanta ansiedad ni tanta incoherencia de pensamiento. Sí…que c*rajo, lo confieso, lo acepto y lo afronto: me enamoré otra vez. Sí, me enamoré otra vez de una linda mujer. Es una situación un tanto incomoda y de la que no daré detalles, pero la decidimos vivir y no me arrepiento. Claro que el amor es lindo, el amor y toda la ristra de emociones que este trae consigo, buenas y malas. Las preguntas no tardaron en llegar. ¿Cómo es posible que esté

enamorada del amor y no de su mirada? ¿Cómo es posible que esté enamorada del amor y no de su sonrisa? ¿Enamorada del amor? ¡Por Dios! ¿Y qué del calor y la seguridad de su abrazo? ¿Y que de la paz de su sueño, ese mismo que cuando estamos juntas cuido? ¿Y qué de la corriente que llega a cada nervio de mi cuerpo cuando siento su mano en mi espalda y en ocasiones en una nalga? Yo me enamoré de su amor, de sus contrastes, de su pasión, de sus roces, de su sexo, de su fuerza y su debilidad. Entonces, ¿bajo que clasificación debo empaquetar las noches de estrellas compartidas, las puestas y salidas de sol, las cursilerías, la ternura, los besos y calenturas? Me parece que si estuviese “enamorada del amor” me afectarían igual las acciones de amor de otras personas, ¿o no? Pero claro que estoy enamorada del amor, pero del que Ella lleva dentro y del que me hace sentir a diario y que se refleja, ya sea en una lágrima, en una sonrisa, en unos mimos o en una canción. Hoy, pongo mis confusiones de lado y decido seguir en la complicidad de vivir el presente sin tenerle miedo al mañana que es solamente incierto. En el amor no se puede ser cobarde y no puedo permitirme dejar de sentir por temor a fracasar. Sólo tengo el día de hoy para querer, entregarme y recibirla en mi ser. Para mi, cuando se trata de vivir el amor de pareja todo riesgo es valido. Así es que amiga, si te encuentras ante el lumbral del amor, con sus inseguridades o sin ellas, sigue adelante y atrévete a vivir tu presente. No te arrepientas de lo que hiciste, sino más bien de lo que dejaste por hacer.

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the aqua ally awards recognized patricia ireland (former president, national organi-

zation for women) and howard simon (executive director, aclu) in coral gables, fl. photos by karina luna / view more photos at www.shemag.com

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feature

PRIDEFEST CELEBRATES ITS 35TH ANNIVERSARY

Celebrating Pridefest Fort Lauderdale at War Memorial in March 2002!

BACK AT THE HOLIDAY PARK/WAR MEMORIAL AUDITORIUM • FORT LAUDERDALE MARCH 10 & 11 Pride South Florida is proud to announce that the 35th anniversary of Pridefest returns to the very popular Holiday Park/War Memorial Auditorium on Saturday and Sunday, March 10 and 11 from 12 pm to 7 pm. Pridefest is a celebration and tribute to the diverse culture of the LGBT community. As usual, there will be non-stop entertainment both days with an outdoor stage highlighted by national recording artist and three-time Grammy nominee Taylor Dayne. Some of the other entertainment includes The Voice finalist Beverley McClellan, actor and LGBT activist Jonathan D. Lovitz, Michele Balan of Last Comic Standing, Simon Says, Signal 2, KP Productions, Sunshine Cathedral Chorus, The Vanya E’Dan Dance Company, The South Florida Gay Men’s Chorus, Eryn Woods, Yovanni, The Jazz Ensemble, Ray Guell, Alexis Salgado, Church of the Holy Spirit, Julissa Veloz, Tony Cruz and many more. In addition to the over 250 vendors, delicious food and games, the dance floor will feature some of South Florida’s hottest DJs. Official Pridefest events will be held at several nightclubs and venues in town starting Thursday, March 8 at 8pm with Dinner at Beefcakes next to the Boardwalk; Saturday, March 10 at 7pm will feature a meet and greet at The Depot with Beverly McClellan and a meet and greet with entertainers at Bill’s Filling Station on March 11 at 7pm. Admission to Pride is $10 per day or $15 for the 2-day pass that must be purchased in advance at PrideSouthFlorida.org. So get your rainbow boas and get ready for a weekend celebration with pride! Pride South Florida is a 501(C)3 non-profit organization run by unpaid volunteers. PSF aims to produce a highly professional Pride Festival that is not only economically valuable to our community to promote itself as the #1 Gay and Lesbian destination in the USA, but also benefits South Florida LGBT community organizations. 100% of the proceeds from Pridefest are distributed through a grant program each spring. For more information on Pridefest events, volunteering and other activities go to PrideSouthFlorida.org or call the Pride Line at 954-561-2020.

Performing live Taylor Dayne, Michelle Balan & Beverly McClellan among others. Visit She Magazine booth both days! SHE - 42 - 03/12

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she classifieds accommodations

events

Key West’s Distinctive Resort

Pearl’s is an all-welcome historic inn offering guesthouse ambiance and resort amenities. With Key West’s One Human Family atmosphere, Pearl’s offers full breakfast, 2 clothingoptional (but bottoms up) pools, 2 hot tubs, gym, and poolside bar and grill. 800-749-6696. www.pearlskeywest.com.

THE HIGHLANDS INN — PA LESBIAN PARADISE!

Legal gay weddings. We have more brides from FL than any other state! 19 charming rooms, 100 private acres in New Hampshire’s vacation destination, the White Mountains. Pink Choice Award since 2007. www.highlandsinn-nh.com 1-877 LES-B-INN (537-2466)Hotels. 1-877-LES-B-INN • highlandsinn-nh.com.

community groups/organizations

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she searches IT’S TIME FOR YOU TO BE IN SHE!

She Girls: Send us a color photo with contact information. Email us at: info@shemag.com.

Advertising in She: A Lot More Affordable Than You Think. Call Today 954-354-9751 SHE -

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she classifieds legal

services

miscellaneous WHAT'S ON YOUR E-READER?

Beautiful, Sensual, & Romantic Novels & Erotic Novellas from American Author K'Anne Meinel. Lesbian Stories & Thrillers available on Smashwords.com .

photographers

wanted... SELL SOMETHING YOU LOVE Sales representatives (FT or PT) iwanted. Unlimited earning potential and some of the highest commissions in the industry! Sales experience, professionalism and a love for She a MUST! Send resumes to info@shemag.com. SHE -

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with the village sage

scopes AQUARIUS JAN 21 - FEB 19

leo July 23 - aug 22

Your mental powers are laser-beamed on your career and finances. New ideas are easy to come by, but not so easy to implement right now. Don’t get reckless with your cash. Take inventory of your possessions, have realistic budget talks projections of cash-flow. Exercise patience when others question your vision. Explain and discuss, rather than just defend. Remember, it’s better to fix the leaks before you set sail.

You’re in the mood for some romantic-comedy adventures. The Universe is giving you permission to mix business with pleasure, as long as you can pay-asyou-play. Do all you can to increase your cash flow, if not your net worth. Expect the unexpected, doublecheck everything, and bring your sense of humor and a book with you wherever you go.

pisces feb 20 - mar 20 It’s a good time to re-invent yourself as the new and improved version of you. Whether the changes are professional or personal, the shift in how you view yourself is long overdue. That’s the best use of retrograde periods. Circumstances push you to re-evaluate your life. Find a way to balance your intellectual thoughts with your emotional reactions, and you will be able to make a plan that will work.

virgo aug 23 - sept 23

aries mar 21 - apr 20

libra sept 24 - oct 23

Your energy level is being ruled by your tasks. If you’re planning a play date, your energy surges to high. If you have to work, your energy is low. Plan alone time to recharge your batteries and to rethink your strategies. Be realistic about your past history and the cause and effect of your successes and failures. Concentrate on the positive, ignore the negative, and do your best not to be impulsive with word or deed.

You’ll have to make an effort not to over-react to all of the snafus in your everyday life, or you’ll be see-sawing your emotions all month. Keep your balance and be open to new and different solutions. Think before you speak, look before you leap, and be ready, willing, and able to release any negatives. Be the diplomat who uses charm to coerce everyone to compromise, and cooperate, and work together, and better.

taurus apr 21 - may 21

scorpio oct 24 - nov 22

You’ll have a fun and social time. However, you’re still on the same planet, so you’ll also have to put some time and energy in recognizing past mistakes and trying not to repeat them. Share your hopes and dreams as you network yourself, but be open to suggestions from those who could help you achieve goals. Actively seek to expand your sphere of influence, do your best to make friends, and influence people.

Your creative juices are flowing, social invitations are arriving daily, and yet your work load seems to be growing in leaps and bounds. Not to worry. You can do it all if you prioritize. You’ve got permission to enjoy your life and spend time with your friends and family. Just don’t go totally crazy. Pace yourself for optimum enjoyment. Remember, tomorrow is another day, and you are still expected to show up.

gemini may 22 - june 21

sagittarius nov 23 - dec 21

You may not fully understand where all the frustration is coming from. If it doesn’t help you, move out of your present situation. Commit to the task for the task’s sake. Allow as much time as it takes to successfully complete it before moving on to the next one. Your own focus and determination will determine the outcome of any of your efforts, as well as your willingness to embrace compromise and change.

You’re torn between wanting to pursue career opportunities and wanting to spend time doing some do-ityourself improvements. Be careful not to make major decisions or changes without focusing. Be content to lay the groundwork and plant the seeds for your future success. Spend some quality time with friends and family, and don’t be afraid to put them to work hoeing, sowing and enjoying the fruits of their labor.

cancer June 22 - july 22

capricorn dec 22 - jan 20

Remember that the only thing you can really control in life is your own reaction. Imitate a little cancer-crab scurrying along, intent only on getting from here to there safely. Social networking will provide umbrella coverage, so promote yourself and win support for goal. There will always be nay-sayers to any plan, and every plan could stand some tweaking. Don’t be defensive about accepting advice

It should come as no surprise that your focus is on your career and your finances. What is surprising is your willingness to make adjustments to your plan. Sudden, impulsive changes are not recommended. Visiting local ethnic markets, restaurants, or museums can satisfy your wanderlust. The important thing is to enhance your experience by being open to the completely new and different.

Relationship issues, combined with financial ones, create a volatile mix. Work together for the common good. Pay special attention to your health. It’s important to work off your nervous energy in productive ways, like running the treadmill, rather than pacing the floor. Impulsive fiscal decisions will have longterm ramifications. Be realistic about projections about future cash flow expectations.

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