How to deal with insecurity in relationships The Dark Side of Muscle Building Remarkabe women you should know!
Yvonne Jegede ties the knot!
Editorial Vol 2, Iss 4 ,2017
In This Edition How to cope with fibroids Treat stretch marks at home Identifying your Talents Successful and Remarkable women you should know. Mind games couples play Security & Self Appreciation in relationships.
Poem
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Harmony in the Valley In the valley, the bright morning sun, caresses the trees. The reflection of the sun shimmers and glitters, The dazzling rays pierce through the branches The light awakens all that breaths. The flowers blossom with delight. The birds squeak and squawk. The animals stretch and flex, It’s a new day for all that breaths.
The Dark Side of Mus- Another day of plenty for them cle Building Celebrity news Customer Acquisition tips for startups
that seek. For in the valley there is harmony of desires and wants SHINE Magazine
Editorial In the month of March, almost every lead discussion celebrates women for their laudable contribution in the development of the world. From the peasant woman to the corporate lady; for they have all played a major role in raising the leaders of today. I look back at the yesteryears and I remember women who followed their dreams to the very last. Some toiled to give their children ( especially the girls) the education they never had ,just to make sure the girl child would have a place better than the kitchen; partaking in discussions where opinions count. All of these make me appreciate the strength of a woman. “It is like the waves of the sea-so strong to overcome obstruction and so determined to reach the shore. Yet so tender to those that love its touch� In bravery and strength women go through pregnancy and child bearing, dealing with multiple emotions, but are still able to smile and comfort the ones they love. With determination and will power they stop at nothing to transform their dreams into reality. In selflessness, they put all other before them which often includes getting their loved ones to be the best they can be. To all the women, I say BRAVO!!! Happy Women’s Day
Publisher
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Watch!
How to Cope with Fibroids Fibroids are non cancerous muscular tumors that grow in the wall of the uterus (womb), commonly found in women aged of 3040s. Though the actual cause of fibroids is unknown to scientist, some patterns can be attributed to it such as family history, early menstruation and over weight etc. Some claims hold that women who do not have children or who lastly had children at a young age are vulnerable to fibroids.. Symptoms : The symptoms of fibroids differ from woman to woman. But if you experience any of these symptoms continuously, you should see your doctor. heavy and painful periods Backache Constipation Discomfort in the lower abdomen (especially if fibroids are large) Frequent urination Painful sex Swelling in the lower abdomen (especially if fibroids are large) Labor problems Pregnancy problems Fertility problems Repeated miscarriages By Karl ( MD. USA)
Source: www.medicalnewstoday.com
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Treatment: This dependents on the age of the woman, the complications at hand and the size of the fibroids, However, the most common form of treatment for fibroids are surgical. Home remedies: Sometimes, the women may be close to menopause and if the size of the fibroid is not a cause for alarm, she is often placed on a watchful wait during which the fibroid would often shrink away. During such moments the woman can try out this simple home remedy while watching carefully for any discomfort. Castor Oil: Applying castor oil on the abdomen may help shrink the fibroid faster and also aid in pain relief. This is because castor oil stimulates the lymphatic and circulatory systems, and increases lymphocytes (disease-fighting cells) to eliminate diseasecausing toxins from the body. Many holistic practitioners believe a buildup of these toxins play an important role in fibroid development. Castor oil also contains ricinoleic acid with antiinflammatory properties. Use Castor oil following these steps. 1. Saturate a piece of wool in castor oil. 2. Place it on your abdomen and cover it with a plastic wrap. 3. Place a heating pad or hot water bottle on it and cover that with an old towel. 4. Leave it on for about one hour, and then remove it. Repeat three or four times a week for at least one month . NOTE: This is not a replacement for medical treatment
Trending!
Coko Diamond “Discovering your talents is the key to a successful and passion filled life.” Cameroonian born, Colette Fonkika is a fashion designer resident in the Diaspora . She is a rare germ in the African fashion industry making headway with her creativity and style; famous for her “Double side cape” design,. Driven by the desire to be unique and different, this designer looked beyond her academic training, to find her special abilities which she has worked on to be where she is today. As a fashion designer also running her own runway show– FashNet (fashion and entertainment runway show. ) she is considered successful. She found what she was good at, then polished it and today she is great at it.
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Me Myself and I
Simple Tips for the Stretch Marks. When a woman is pregnant, the common fear is what becomes of the stretch marks after delivery. Same thing happens when people lose weight. Stretch marks typically appear as bands of parallel lines on your skin. These lines are a different color and texture than your normal skin, and they range from purple to bright pink to light gray. When you touch stretch marks with your fingers, you might feel a slight ridge or indentation on your skin. Sometimes, stretch marks feel itchy or sore. Stretch marks aren’t dangerous, and they often disappear over time. However, the waiting my be long. Here are a few home remedies for fast results.
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Home Remedies for Stretch Marks Though stretch marks are natural, they look and feel odd on the skin. In some severe situations, surgical treatment may be recommended. If you have the regular stretch mark, you can use what you have in your kitchen to fade them out. Sugar Sugar is used as a natural exfoliant for skin. It is one of the best home remedies to get rid of stretch marks. Take a tablespoon of sugar. Add some drops of almond oil and lemon juice in it. Stir it well and apply directly on the stretch marks. Rub it for 8-10 minutes and then, take a shower. Continue to use it for one month or so, until the stretch marks gets fade out. Egg Whites To get rid of stretch marks, egg whites are beneficial as they are rich in proteins and amino acid. Extract whites of two eggs. Whip it with the help of a fork. After washing the affected area with clean water, apply a thick layer of egg white with the help of a brush. Let it dry completely and wash it off with cold water. After this, apply some olive oil to moisturize the skin. For two weeks, continue the process daily for better results.
By Nancy. USA.
Cutesy of healthealthsite.com
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Man in D Mirror
Finding your Talents and living with passion Most Africans do not know what their talents are. In most African countries, children are raised with the professional dependency syndrome and this can be blamed on the poorly designed academic curriculum which trains the citizens to take up whatever is available in the job market. As such people join the work force and even retire without ever finding their passion. Do you remember the days when you were told that vocational education was meant for those C students who were not intelligent enough to process the “regular” education? These C students were often sent to learn a trade (vocational training) meanwhile the A students were groomed to desire the professions like doctors, lawyers, teachers among others.
On the other hand the C students in vocational training thought of what they were really good at and exploited every opportunity to improve on it. They discovered their talents and found their passion earlier in life and ended up as business owners; product developers, designers, inventors among others. Today, they are the ones with the fat pay checks, job satisfaction and fulfilled lives; employing the “A” students. Life they say is not a bed of roses but it is also not a farm of thorns. To those who find their passion, avoiding the thorns and braving the fall is not too difficult because all they think of is the harvest. Their minds are fixed on one thing-the results and not the process; which is something those without a passion find difficult to comprehend. Finding your passion is an essential part to a successful and fulfilled life. We are uniquely made and everyone has a talent with special abilities on that talent.
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In other words, only you can do the This is about finding your things you do the way you do. To those drive. In other words, what who know their talents, finding their is it that makes you look forpassion is much easier. To such people, ward to another day? What what may be boring and a turn off to is it that puts you back in others is their source of motivation. your mood after a tough day This is because the fulfillment they get at home or at work? in the service and the impact it creates. Identify your dreams: Go However it is unfortunate that many down memory lane to your people never get to figure out what childhood days. Now write their talents are and as such never find down the things you loved a passion in life. They just live by the doing most back then. Write day, hoping for something better but down the things your friends never doing enough to grab it. Most loved about you. Write down people get caught up in other people’s the things you had wanted to schedules. Others are workaholics and do so badly but didn’t ever even on an excellent pay check but can’t get the chance to. Think of find fulfillment. The thought of a Mon- what you wanted to study day morning is sickening to them and and ask yourself if what you when they start off each week, they ended up with actually recan’t wait for the weekend. Such attiflects those days. It’s never tude is evidence of dissatisfaction and too late to redirect your inward unrest. path. If you haven’t found your passion, the Identify what you do with following steps can help you discover ease. Think of the things you your talents and find your passion. do effortlessly … click to Identify your motivation: Take a piece read more of paper and write down the things that Kizito Njah (Singapore) motivate and inspire you. You need to know what your source of motivation is
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Climbing the Ladder
Young and Remarkable women You Should Know. In life we are either climbing or falling. It is either a success or a failure but that notwithstanding, the success often comes after the failure. When one listens to the stories of successful people today , there is a common trend– they all had multiple failures but they didn’t lose focus on their goal. They held on strong to their dreams.. These women below are some inspiring examples to identify with. They have made it against all odds . Today they are celebrated in Africa and beyond breaking myths and boundaries.
Dr. Vera Songwe
a Cameroonian by nationality is the World banks Country Director for Senegal, Cape Verde, Gambia, Guinea Bissau, and Mauritania. Still in her mid thirties, she has been the Advisor to the Managing Director who oversaw the World Bank Operations in the Africa, Europe and Central Asia and South Asia regions. She is a member of the World Bank team that recently raised a historic US$49.3 billion dollars in concessional financing for the low income countries of the World as part of the International Development Association (IDA) 16th replenishment. Source: https://www.brookings.edu/experts
Dr. Olamide Orekunrin
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a British-Nigerain
in her early thirties is the founder of Flying Doctors Nigeria, the lone air ambulance, West of Africa. Motivated by the death of her sister who couldn’t make it to hospital in time during a health crisis. Today, the Lagos-based company is in it’s third year and has flown over 500 patients and victims of medial emergencies like industrial workers to hospitals for urgent care. Flying doctors is a real time solution for medical emergencies in the face of the poor road network in most African countries. Source:
http://www.cnn.com.
Akosua Afriyie-Kumi
of Ghana is founder and CEO of AAKS a fashion label for special hand crafted bags. The young designer sort to follow her passion, driven by the desire to show the world the beauty of Africa through Ghana’s heritage. Each collection silhouette is unique and tells a different story through detail, colour and shape. The business which started off in 2014 has gained much grounds in the fashion industry at home and abroad. Akosua has been shortlisted as an emerging designer from Africa in Vogue Italia, featured by Elle Decoration South Africa, Forbes Woman Africa, Fashion Revolution and Guardian UK. Source: http://www.djembecommunications.com
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Dr. Zee Writes Back
How to Deal with Mind Games couples Play Mind games are supposed to be teasing and fun in relationships but sometimes couples over do it and this could cause friction . People play mind games in order to test others’ reaction to certain situations . Mind games can be very frustrating and even lead to breakup of great relationships. In order to know how to deal with mind games in a relationship, it is important to understand why people do it . Why People Play Mind Games Insecurity: Some people feel insecure when they are not in control and so play mind games in order to maintain control in the relationship especially when they feel like their opinion no longer counts. Such people will play mind games until they feel they are in charge. Self Resentment and Low Self Esteem: Some people think very poorly of themselves and so get into a relationship hoping the other person will help them feel better about themselves. Perhaps you exhibit confidence and success that they wish the possessed, and by playing mind games they try to put you at the same level as them, or feel like you. Manipulations: Some people are twisters and will stop at nothing to have things their way. . They manipulate you in anyway possible to get what they want. If the normal dialogue doesn’t bring it forth, a little mind game usually does
Common mind games:
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Your boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse invites you to a particular conversation on a particular subject matter and is feeling on top of the world as you babble with the responses. But when you initiate the same discussion, they get angry and rude and aggressive. Your boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse is out rightly upset with you but won’t tell you about it but rather tells you to figure it out yourself. This can be very frustrating especially when you are clueless of what the problem is about. Your Boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse subjects you to emotional blackmail by making you feel weird making certain demands because they claim it reminds them of their sad past. On your part you get needy but can’t talk about it because they will feel bad. A man tired of a relationship but claiming his girlfriend is not infertile because she won’t get pregnant yet no talks of marriage is on the table. The common reaction to this is that the woman tries to proof a point and gets pregnant.
How to Deal With Mind Games Though this may differ from situation to situation, the general rule to stand up tall. This is not by confrontation but by asking them to come forth directly in the language you understand. Ask them to call a spade a spade. Don’t do or say things you are not sure about. If your boyfriend/ girlfriend/spouse was mad at you but won’t speak out and you are sure you don’t know the cause of the problem, simply tell them to tell you how you can help make things better.
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Kitchen Talk
Plantain Porridge
Ingredients Green Plantains Fresh vegetables as desired Maggi and salt to taste. Meat/fish as desired Celery and parsley Chilly/hot pepper (optional).
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Steam vegetables with a pinch of salt Boil meat (goat/pork, lamb, beef,) in ground spices (celery and parsley) Wash and peel plantains. Cut plantains in tiny pieces Put cut plantain in the stock of boiled meat and continue to cook until soft. Now put your steamed vegetables. Add salt and magi to taste. Live to boil for additional 2 minutes so that stoc is marinated in the vegetables. Serve hot.
Bon appétit
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Women’s Corner
Dealing with Insecurity in Relationships A secure women is a box of appreciation. She doesn’t spend time looking at her imperfections. Rather she appreciates who she is, what she is worth etc. An insecure woman on the other hand is a full of baggage. She spends time grumbling over her imperfections; seeking notice, trying to belong, She nags, she complaints all the time, she is aggressive, controlling etc People treat you the way you treat yourself. If you feel less worthy and unattractive, everyone around you starts noticing every problem area on your body, and most often those body parts had always been there and wasn’t any problem until you began feeling “un attractive”. . Insecurity starts in the mind, when your inner dialogue is full of unpleasant conversations For example, the thought in your mind is repeatedly reminding you of an imperfection on your body, a past experience, a character weakness etc
How to deal with Insecurity
Recreate your inner dialogue: This is about spending time on what is available than what you wish was available. Learn to appreciate the things you have and stop worrying about the things you don’t have. For example, appreciate your current relationship and stop worrying your boyfriend/spouse was like A or B.
Irene, Cameroon
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Write down the things you love about yourself. Everyone has some thing good about themselves. Thus write them down and at the start f each day, read them out to yourself, over and over until it makes you smile Say something good about yourself every day: A good way of dealing with insecurity is by engaging in lots of self appreciation. Complement yourself on your dressing, your good manners, your smile, your kindness, your bravery etc. Just anything that makes you feel good about yourself. Be committed to self appreciation and you would boost your confidence and security.
Avoid the company of those you feel insecure around: Some people have a way of looking down on others and making them feel low and less confident. Such people are bad company so stay away from them. Any company that makes you try to impress others just to “belong” is un healthy and unproductive. Avoid them because they will break you and bring out only your weaknesses. Consider everyone around as blind and deaf to your errors. Consider your insecurities as your little secret. Don’t go telling people thinking you are seeking support or sympathy. When you tell others your insecurities, you give them the chance to think they are better than you and this only makes matters worse. Bare in mind that everyone has something they feel insecure about especially those you think are very secure and confident. The only difference is that they keep theirs as a secret while you tell yours to them.
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Ms. P’s Diary Letter to self As I age, I realize that life is indeed very beautiful and God is always good. I look at my trials and painful moments and I see that in everyone of them there was a lesson and a message. What amazes me more is the fact that the length of time I stayed in the misery of every painful experience, could have been avoided if I could bring my mind to visualize the opposite. If I had this understanding back then, I would have chosen to look at the imaginary beautiful picture rather than staring continuously at the painful one I wasted time on. Now I am training my mind to focus on the bright side of every challenge. Though I haven't fully trained my mind to that, I am happy with the results I get for my little effort. Another beautiful side to life is the potentials I see in me. As the days go by, I am discovering my talents and it is making me live with passion. It makes me want to burst out with message of breakthrough for people like me. Life is amazing...
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D’s Month
Women’s Day Celebration The month of March is all about celebrating women and appreciating the role they play in the political, and socioeconomic development. As we celebrate women, let us dig into archives to know more about the women’s day celebrations. International Women's Day (IWD), originally called International Working Women's Day, is celebrated on March 8 every year. The celebrations vary from region to region and from country to country. In some African countries like Cameroon, it is a public holiday celebrated with solidarity march pass of women in different field of life. In other countries, it is celebrated by recognition and awards are offered to women who have played a significant role in the development of the country. In some regions, the day has lost its political flavor and has become simply an occasion for people to express their love for women in a way similar to a mixture of Mother’s Day and Valentine’s Day. A memorable Women's Day celebration with global recognition was the 1975 Icelandic women’s strike which paved the way for the first female president in the world, Vigdis Finnbogadottir. However, irrespective of the region, the day is often celebrated by a political and human rights theme chosen by the United Nations. The theme is meant to run strong political and social awareness of the struggles of women worldwide. This year’s campaign theme is #BeBoldForChange Curtesy of www.internationalwomensday.com
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Guy’s Chat The dark Side of Muscle Building Having a lot of muscle mass is a defining trait of being strong and masculine. Though it is a noble pursuit, there are some risk and hazards involved which people often sideline. Aside from common risks such as disk in the lower back during dead lifts or straining the rotator cuff while bench pressing. men ignore the mental hazards such as Dysmorphia. This is a body image disorder wherein the man is suffering from severe body dissatisfaction. He sees himself as smaller and weaker than he actually is and is preoccupied with his muscles, and thus become consumed with weight training. Men who have low self esteem are advised to work on their self esteem before engaging in muscle building because they are likely to suffer from Dysmorphia. How to Identify someone with Muscle Dysmorphia People who have muscle dysmorphia display a number of similar behaviors. Here is a list of typical behaviors of someone who is experiencing muscle dysmorphia. Extreme exercise, especially resistance and weight training Many hours lifting weights Constant mirror-checking Avoiding social situations where they may appear muscularly small Compare their muscular build to others Extreme attention to diet
Extreme attention to diet Lifting while being injured Anxiety when missing a workout Neglecting family, friends, and job in order to exercise. Use of anabolic steroids to enhance muscle mass.
How to cope with Dysmorphia Re-consider the way you evaluate your own looks. If you hold beliefs that your appearance dictates your value as a person, remind yourself of the many qualities that you value in others. And you will notice that their appearance has very little or nothing to do with it.
Make a list of your rituals and behaviors surrounding your appearance. Without vivid clarity about what it is that you do in response to intrusive thoughts about the way you look, it will be very difficult to intervene. Before making any behavioral changes, which can often be a painful process, write out the daily behaviors traceable to the disorder and the frequency with which you do them. Only list behaviors that occur so often.
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Famous
If you see a Nigerian in this attire, you know the dowry has been delivered and well received. 2017 has been all good for this Nollywood superstar . Ms gorgeous, Yvonne Jegede got married to Olakunle Fawole. on February 2nd When your wedding falls before Valentine’s day it’s a good way to celebrate love. We hope this ends with happily ever after ...
Curtsey of http://www.bellaniaja.com
Yvonne Jegede
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L’ambiance
Lady Ponce, the Bitkusi Queen.
She is the person you want to listen to when in club mood. She is known for her unique traditional Cameroonian beats passing on messages of love, peace and prosperity. With her waist that can turn 360 degrees she can leave anyone mesmerized.
Curtsey www.kamervibe.com
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Opportunities Jobs and Grants Social Enterprise World Forum, 2017 Location: New Zealand , When: 27-29 September . Registration Deadline: April 17. International Youth Leadership Conference, 2017 When: March18-23rd Location: Dubai 6th International Youth Conference on Energy 2017. Location: Budabest, Hungary Deadline– 5th May 2017 IWMF Howard G. Buffet Fund for Women Journalist. Eligibility: Women around the world. Deadline: March 7, 2017.Yale Young African Scholars 2017 UN Volunteers, 2017 Position: Grant Proposal Writer. Location: Zambia Eco Bank Fintech Challenge, 2017 Eligibility: African Tech innovators and entrepreneurs. Deadline:
April 14, 2017
Possible Interview Questions & Answers
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Preparing for an interview is a good way of impressing your employers and communicating your confidence and mastery in your field of experience. Below are common questions and guide on how to answer. 1. What would your former colleagues say negative about you? Almost every interview has this question in different forms. This question is indirectly asking you for your weaknesses as far as your professional life is concern. Never use a weakness on personal quality. In order to stand out, respond by making your weaknesses sound like a strength needed in your job. For example, They may say I’m pushy but that is because I am so goal oriented and would stop at nothing to get the desired results and create an impact”. 2. Why should we hire you? In addition to summarizing your experiences, also say what makes you unique from all other interviewees who might have been interviewed: For example, "With five years' experience working in the marketing industry... and my proven record of..., I'm confident I would be a great addition to your team. In addition to this, I am very flexible and goal oriented and I could make a big difference in your company.." 3. Why do you want to work here? By asking you this question, the interviewer wants to know if you truly have their company at heart. To stand out, link up your goals and values to the company’s mission statement and how it is a perfect fit for you. But also say how you can use it to contribute to their growth. For example, " I love helping people and in line with your mission statement... I saw that this company shares my values and I can use my prior experience and inner abilities to help the company attain it’s goals." George Texas, USA
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The Consultant Customer Acquisition Tips for Startups. For every startup, acquiring customers is the key to the growth and sustenance of the business. In order to increase your pull of customers, it is important to develop a customer acquisition plan. Below are the points to consider. Define your ideal customer. Break down your target audience by their unique characteristics. Understand their likes, what they do, where they are and what time is best to reach them. This will lead to doing the right thing at the right time. Determine your goals: Goals, strategies and priorities would keep you focused with the right kind of energy needed by your customers. For example, a goal could be to increase the number of actual buyers of your product, and the priority could be to increase the number of website visitors. In order to get this, you need to strategize on how to increase the number of daily visitors and how to make these visitors become paying customers. Some strategies could include paid advertising, allowing free use of content on your website, using social media for engagement among others.
3. Define your measurement: Every plan must have a measurement and evaluation guide. This will enable you know what strategies are yielding and which ones need to be reviewed. Set modalities for measurement. This could be weekly, monthly, quarterly etc depending on the size of the startup
Laaaaaugh
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To All Women : Bravo!!! ...Happy Women’s Day