Lifestyle
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SIMPLY LIVING FRANCE
PAGE 12
FRIENDS ARE WORTH THEIR WEIGHT IN GOLD
often say, “friends are worth their weight in gold” and it’s so true. True friends are the ones for whatever reason we might go for weeks, months or even years without seeing or contacting each other, but when we do, the conversation flows from the minute we begin. I have many ‘friends’, ex colleagues, former neighbours, uni-friends, relatives etc but I can literally count on my fingers the number of ‘true’ friends I have. The ones I know without a shadow of doubt I can call on, day or night, for help. They are the ones who would drop anything to help, who know without being told exactly is needed. Social media leads us all to believe we have lots of friends, some people number these ‘friends’ in the hundreds and for some it’s a race to see how many of these so-called friends they can acquire. It boosts their self-esteem and gives them an air of importance. But are they ‘real’ friends? I somehow very much doubt it. I have an old friend, who excitedly informed me he had nearly three hundred friends, yet when he was really down on his luck recently how many offered help? Only a few, and they were his true friends, a lesson he learned the hard way. We had been friends for over thirty years, seeing each other off and on as his mental health issues prevented more regular contact, he would ostracise himself from social situations, change addresses and then out of the blue he would call. He popped up just as COVID started to rear its head, he was frightened and very keen to reignite the friendship. He uses a bank near our house despite living a short journey away, I offered to bake him a cake which he could pick up in a socially distanced way (from the doorstep), we chatted at a safe distance and tried to alleviate his concerns and calm his fears. We encouraged him to get out walking, and once the restrictions reduced, we invited him into our garden for a socially distanced lunch in the sunshine. He would text to say he was coming to town,
I would bake a cake, he would pop in and all seemed well, then suddenly his mental health issues flared up. I received a nasty message and after I replied asking exactly what he meant, he cut off all contact. Sadly, I don’t have a current address for him, and he has blocked my number on his phone, but I am sure he knows he can reignite the contact when he needs to. It’s his choice now. Now don’t get me wrong FB can be amazing at linking old friends up once more, I am now in touch with someone I went to grammar school within London back in the early 60’s. My family moved to Hampshire when I was 11 and we lost touch (no social media in those days and very few families had a telephone) then suddenly out of the blue I received a friend request. The years melted away when we met for a coffee, we chattered away for a couple of hours, coffee going cold. In an even stranger twist of fate her sister lives about a hundred and fifty yards away from my house, how’s that for coincidence? We meet up each time she is in Winchester, she still lives in SE London but has a holiday home in Cornwall. Here we are enjoying that very first cup of coffee.
My true friends are few, one I have known since I was 17, I was there when she got engaged, got married, had children and now I hope to be able to see her in person really soon, she has terminal cancer. The pandemic has prevented me from vis-
