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Volume 1, Number 6
July
inside
2009
11 Featured Singles
05 Contributors
12 Serving One 06 Editor’s letter
Veal Limone
Remembering Michael Jackson
07 The Column Balancing act
08 STOP Looking for love at the meat market
13 Lipstick Corner The dark side of love
14 On the town with MSM
15 Horoscopes 4
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Janelle Powers, writer, janelle.powers@ singlesmag.net Janelle was born and raised right here in Boston. She attended Hofstra University in New York where she studied both journalism and theatre. She’s had several small acting roles in both film and television, as well as some roles on the stage. She is currently working as histology technician and lives in Brighton with her fiancé.
Bobby Carr, writer, bobby.carr@singlesmag.net Bobby is always looking to utilize his creative attributes, which have led him in many different directions such as starring in the independent horror film Prichard and Silas and now following his true passion to be a writer. Bobby states “My only unfulfilled aspiration is finding true love, because I believe you are not truly happy unless you can share that happiness with someone else which is why I am ecstatic about writing for a singles magazine.”
Mehdy Ogine-Noel, photographer, realtouch@ymail.com Mehdy earned his graphic design degree from the Katherine Gibbs school in 2003. He owns RealtoucH, a photography company. Mehdy has done photography for weddings, corporate events, and websites. Visit him on www.realtouchpg.com
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{Editor’s letter} I remember Michael Jackson, the king of pop Dear Readers, I had already written my editor’s note when I heard of Michael Jackson’s death. My notes were about the different changes that MSM would be going through in the next few months. Also, I wanted to share with readers my short term and long term goals for MSM. I wanted to let readers know that soon MSM will have its own office. Less than one week before I was to send the magazine to the printer, news of Michael’s death was all over the media. At which time, I decided that it was more important to write about a man who touched the lives of so many. I will write about the upcoming changes of MSM in the next issue. I remember when I was a young girl growing up in Haiti, Michael Jackson’s videos were always on TV. Though I spoke no English then, I understood Michael’s message in his videos Black And White and We are the world. His music touched my life so much that when I found out about his death, I was in tears. Although the last few years of Michael’s life weren’t the best, he is still an icon. I dedicated this edition of MSM to his memory.
Marie Stuart Noel Publisher and Editor-in-Chief 617-527-0381 Publisher@singlemag.net
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The Column The balancing act As we get older there are certain aspects of our lives that become increasingly difficult to sustain. Some relationships weaken and others become stronger and we soon realize that a balancing act must be performed between significant others, friends and family. We also discover that we have a responsibility to stay focused in our professional lives. But what happens when one aspect of our life overpowers the rest and begins to affect our overall performance? Do we continue to juggle in hopes that our audience stays entertained with our slacking effort, or do we drop everything and focus on the one thing that’s stealing the show? Three weeks into the cusp of my of educational completion, I began to experience the stresses of balancing school, work and a social life and realized that instead of focusing on the positive future, I was obsessing over the stressful present. Being single and stressed out, I had officially gone from ring leader to sad clown. Coming to this realization I decided I needed to make a few minor changes to balance out my life and avoid an emotional breakdown. Later that week, as I set out on yet another first date, I found myself distant and distracted. I was obsessing over personal pressures instead of focusing on the person right in front of me. My balancing act was failing and in the long run affecting my overall performance when it came to dating. Had I become so obsessed with bettering myself, that I had worsened my chances at finding love? As I was attempting to balance dating and daily stressors, my good friend Annie was stressing over a sudden change in lifestyle. It had been six months since Annie and Salina had met and three months since she had gotten used to dating a girl. Fortunately enough she had much to celebrate since her birthday, anniversary and Pride all happen to fall on the same day. Unfortunately, three different celebratory occasions meant choosing between her friends, her family and her lover. As her closest friends prepared a surprise party and some fabulous events for the following day, her other half was about to unintentionally steal the show. Annie faced the pressures of entertaining her lover and showing appreciation towards her friends, and eventually began to wish she was a disappearing act rather than the main attraction. She chose to stay in the next day and skip the fabulous events, however while she celebrated her commitment to one, she felt guilt for breaking it with others. One aspect of her life was stealing the show, causing an inability to balance relationships with the ones she loved and the one she was in love with. On the same day that Annie stayed in, I stayed true to my words. On a third date, while casually hanging out, my date informed me that he was not. We drank draft beer and engaged in slightly uncomfortable conversation, and as I attempted to avoid obsessing over the negative, I realized my date had an obsession of his own. Being in the closet meant being indirectly unavailable. I quickly came to conclusion that two people obsessing over the wrongs in their lives, were never going to make things right. On my way home, I came to the realization that as we attempt to balance everything in lives, one side may out way the other. With that said, it’s important to keep in mind that a perfect balance between friends, family, lovers, and personal issues is not always a necessity. As long we don’t allow the weight of one throw us over, we can continue on unharmed. 7
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STOP looking for love at the Meat market By Marie Stuart Noel
R
ecently, I was at a local bar with an associate and she informed me that her only reason for being at this bar was to get her self a boyfriend. She told me how she hated being single and looks forward to going to bars on a weekly basis, hoping to find a great guy. I wished her luck but I really was thinking “In this meat market, she will not find Mr. Right.” Mr. Right-now was definitely at the bar giving her the “sexy eyes” but he looked nothing like a boyfriend material. When looking for Mr. or Mrs. Right, why do single men and women think going to a meat market will help them in their search? I am telling you right now to STOP looking for love at the meat market. Before going any further, I suppose that I must define the term “meat market.” According to the Urban Dictionary, a meat market is “a place where guys go to meet the ladies, and ladies show up to tease the guys. Pairing is done solely on the basis of physical attraction. the selection of quality meat in the butcher shop is a similar process.” 8
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Meat markets are not confined to just bars or nightclubs, it’s usually the types of people that make the meat market, not necessarily the venue. In my opinion, meat markets are ideal for one night stands so if someone is looking to be in a serious relationship, they should look elsewhere. Most of the men and women who frequent these places are fake and arrogant, which are not good qualities in a mate. What makes a social establishment a meat market? I think for a place to be considered a meat market, it must have the reputation of catering to a certain crowd whose sole purpose is to see and be seen. The bouncers, managers and bartenders of these establishment contribute to its superficiality to increase revenue. It seems to me that the known meat market venues in Boston have stayed in business longer than other venues. The staff at a night club contributes to the meat market by allowing only attractive women into their establishment and having the other women that are deemed unattractive, wait in line. The staff also makes sure the ratio of women to men inside the venue is at least 3-1 to encourage more men to want to come. I urged my associate to abandon her search for Mr. Right at these sorts of establishments and look into a different avenue to score her prince charming. I doubt she’s taken my advice, but I hope she keeps in mind once she gets to a certain age, the meat market will be over for her. 9
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By Marie Stuart Noel I have been to all the venues below and have found most of the patrons to be very artificial. As I stated in the previous pages in the “STOP looking for love at the meat market” article, it’s mostly the people that frequent an establishment who turn it into a meat market. I am in no way discouraging people from frequenting these bars and nightclubs, I am simply stating the obvious. These establishments are in no particular number because this list is made solely based on my opinion.
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To be featured as a single in Massachusetts’ Singles Magazine, please fill out the form on the MSM’s single page on www.singlesmag.net. Or you may email singles@singlesmag.net and Call 617-527-0381, Monday-Friday. Posting your profile on MSM is free.
Sandram@singlesmag.net
Zodiac Sign: Aries Lives in: Quincy, MA Works in: Boston, MA MSM: What do you do for work? Sandra: I work in non-profit.
MSM: What are your hobbies? Sandra: Whenever possible, I enjoy taking naps in the middle of the day. I don’t watch much TV at home but I love going to the movies with friends or someone special.
MSM: What is your favorite hang out place? Sandra: I don’t go out much during the week because I work, and I don’t go out on the weekends because I try to relax.
MSM: How long have you been single and what do you look for in a mate? Sandra: I've been single for sometime because I don’t really meet people that I’m compatible with. I like someone who is a bit of an extrovert as I’m an introvert. A guy who is smart and family orientated. I disliked guys who are out to use women for time, money and/ sex. 11
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Most people eat chicken and beef only. When you are single and have little time to cook dinner, the only time you get to eat something that isn’t chicken or beef is on special occasion. The Italian dish is quick, yet is top restaurant quality that can be served over vegetable, pasta, potatoes and rice.
Veal Limone 1 5pc. thinly sliced veal 2 ½ cup seasoned flour (salt & pepper mixed with flour) 3 4 tablespoons olive oil 4 1 tablespoon capers 5 ½ fresh lemon 6 ¼ cup white wine 7 ¼ cup chicken stock 8 Touch of butter
Heat oil in medium sautee pan get pan nice and hot Dredge veal through seasond flour shake off excess Place veal in pan lightly brown (sear) first side Pull pan away from flame add wine return to flame Add capers and stock finish with a squeeze of the lemon halve and butter If needed remove veal and continue to reduce sauce for desired consistency.
Chef Eric Thompson of Trattioria 89 Centrale located in Milford, MA has put together the recipe for the Veal Limone and it is to die for. Enjoy! 12
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Written by a woman, for women
The Dark side of love
questions then you may want to reevaluate the person
By Janelle Powers with whom you share your heart with. Sometimes it Don’t be fooled by their charm charisma, and their is hard to see through the fog of love and may need good looks. What you see on the outside, may not an outsider’s opinion on the situation. I can’t stress always be what is on the inside. Love is one of the enough the fact that it is really better to be alone than few things in this world that can bring both extreme in a toxic relationship that may one day blow up in pleasure and exquisite pain. It’s amazing, fun and your face. It is human nature to not want to be alone, gives you life and strength but it can also be dark, to have someone to build a life with and grow old dangerous, scary, and full of traps. How do you with. The wrong kind of people prey on these facts avoid the dark side of love? There is no real formula and use it to their advantage. for it. In fact it can be quite difficult to spot, but the For all women, I can’t stress enough the importance proof of its existence is in the news. Neil Entwistle, of taking at least a basic self defense class. You may Scott Peterson, and Drew Peterson all belong on the be in trouble one day with no one or no weapons other side of love. These men loved their wives and around and you’ll need to rely on yourself for they all appeared to be doting caring husbands and survival. Always talk, get to know the mate or fathers but underneath that shiny veneer, they were potential lover, their background, their views and cold, calculating, and twisted. Here area few red their past. This is a critical clue into the person’s flags that may help spot these kinds of lovers. Are mind that may help you determine how far you want they overly jealous, secretive about where they go to go with any potential mate. And please always and what they are doing? Do they always want to remember if he hit you once he WILL do it again. know what you’re doing or who you’re with?. Do There are no excuses or apologies in this arena. You they want to isolate you from your friends and don’t want to be tied to this kind of person family? Are they overly controlling, do they want to permanently. Love is a dangerous game in which tell you how to dress and whom to be friends with? If anyone can end up on the wrong side of it. you have answered yes to more than two of these 13
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Earrings
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CANCER June 22-July 22 There's a huge difference between sensing and knowing something is wrong with a budding relationship. While it's tempting to follow your gut reaction, get all the facts first before jumping to the worst possible conclusion. LEO July 23-August 22 Temper, temper! Being passionate about a certain topic close to your heart is one thing, but flying off your handle is quite another. Keep your anger in check or you could end up turning off a potential suitor. VIRGO August 23-September 22 Remember that phrase about not throwing rocks when you live in a lovely glass condo? Don't be too critical of others when you're not exactly perfect yourself. Give your love interest a chance to make mistakes. LIBRA September 23-October 22 As much as you like to be in control of every aspect of your life, don't get too upset if your love life doesn't go according to plan. Love is a fickle thing. And even though you did everything by the book, that doesn't mean someone else is playing fair. SCORPIO October 23 - November 21 Indulge your passion for art. Go to the art museum or take in a few local art galleries at lunch. Carry a blank book at all times and sketch as you people watch. Doodle as though you were the next Picasso. SAGITTARIUS November 22-December 21 Is that second cup of coffee doing nothing to jump start your day? Perhaps you need something more than caffeine to rev up your energy level. Plug in your headphones and listen to some up-tempo techno. Ask that hottie for music suggestions!
CAPRICORN December 22-January 19 Bounce ideas off of family and friends. Your creativity will appeal to a number of impressionable people. Take advantage of this and let your talent shine. Soon you could be well on your way to working on a variety of exciting projects.
AQUARIUS January 20-February 18 A new influx of cash may tempt you to go on one heck of a shopping spree. A sexy new outfit could do wonders for your self-esteem, but sooner or later the bill will leaving you with buyer's remorse. Save the money for another time PISCES February 19-March 20 Spin your dormant ideas into gold. You have the ear of important people so don't waste this opportunity to prove yourself. Do your best and prepare to impress those with the power to make your dreams come true. ARIES March 21-April 19 Dreams hold secrets to how we really feel about someone special. Pay attention to plot lines, symbols and your mood during the dream. Write it down ASAP and analyze with help from a dream dictionary. TAURUS April 20-May 20 Friends have a way of giving great advice, so listen up. You're about to hear some wise words from a close pal who understands more about romance than that annoying Cupid joker.
GEMINI May 21-June 21 Constant misunderstandings can ruin any budding romance. When chatting with your current flame, make sure all lines of communication are crystal clear. Leave no room for interpretation on the big deal issues.
*horoscopes.astrology.com 15
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