Sophie Woman's Magazine - June 2016 Issue by Sophie Woman's Magazine

VOLUME 12 - ISSUE 4 / JUNE 2016

phie Woman’s Magazine

INSIDE: Girlfriends In God ~

You are who God says you are! | Page 10

Sophisticated Women ~ Wouldn’t you rather die trying than wind-up in regret? | Page 8 He Said, She Said ~ Would you do with less if you could get more? | Page 24

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Heart from the

hy do I plant flowers when I hate to water them so much? The reason is because I LOVE THEM. Now I know this is not a deep thought but it is funny how simple things can take your mind to some astonishing thoughts. When I was on the porch doing the dreaded watering to the beloved flowers, asking this question to, I don’t know, the birds….I was struck with this thought, does God ever look at me and ask why did I create her when she takes so much work? The answer: He loves me. Unconditionally! I wish I could learn to do that. My flesh reacts in ways other than loving someone unconditionally. Joan Rivers used to use the phrase “Can we talk”. Perhaps most of you reading this right now may be scratching your head and asking… “Joan who?” Please note that I am not encouraging you to look up some of her dialogue because a whole lot of it was stuff I would not recommend. However, right now I want to ask you….”Can we talk?” If you and I knew each other fairly well and we were sitting down together just chatting, would you be able to open up.... completely, honestly and let me see in your life? The sad thing is that most of us wear a mask so no one can see the real us. We are so afraid to be completely honest about things we stuff in deep. Why is that? Is it because we want to be accepted, cherished and loved and we are so afraid if we let the real “us” show, then no one would accept us? Recently I have heard people say they had “a past” or they “took the wrong road”. I don’t think we are to relish in our

From The Editor: Judy Smith

past and glamorize it but I do think sometimes we just need to be “real” and quit trying to pretend. After all, God knows all about us and we can’t keep it from Him. The Bible tells us in Romans Chapter 3: “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God”. I love what the International Standard Version says it....”since all have sinned and continue to fall short of God’s glory”. Did you get that? We all have and we all still do! So why do so many of us go around acting like we have it all together? Can you honestly tell me that you don’t have anything that gnaws at you or you don’t have a wayward child or grandchild that breaks your heart or you don’t struggle with anything in your life? Why can’t we quit pretending and be able to share our burdens without feeling condemned? Maybe because the only One that loves us unconditionally is Jesus Christ. Wouldn’t it be great though if we all realized everyone, including ourselves, had faults and fell short? Now that God has taught me things from my flowers, I guess I better make my way out the door, grab my watering can and show them how much I love them. Even with all the attention I have to give them, they still make me smile. I hope I make God smile! How much attention do you need? I cannot answer that for you but I can assure you with all my heart that God thinks you are so worth it!

www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 3

phie Woman’s Magazine

P.O. Box 1393 22 South Main Ave. Newton, NC 28658 (P) 828-466-0122 (F) 828-466-0124 Editor: Judy Smith Production & Design Manager: Scott Hansley Sales: Judy Smith 828-466-0122 judy@sophiewomansmagazine.com How to place an ad: Call our office at (828)466-0122 and leave a message. One of our sales representatives will return your call as soon as possible. You may also fax material to (828)466-0124. We reserve the right to refuse to run any ad we deem to be controversial or in bad taste.

A Special Thanks To All Of Our Distributors Please be sure to visit all of our participating advertisers and remember to support area local small businesses. For more information about advertising or to view Sophie Woman’s Magazine online, visit our website at www.sophiewomansmagazine.com.

************************************************ Disclaimer: Sophie Woman’s Magazine LLC is published monthly. The articles published in Sophie do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the publisher. All articles are intended for informational purposes only, and none should serve as a substitute for doctor’s advice and orders. Advertisers are solely responsible for the content and validity of information published within their ads and are not necessarily endorsed by the publisher. Deceptive or misleading advertising is not knowingly accepted by the publisher. Advertising is accepted with the understanding that all liability for copyright violations is the sole responsibility of the advertiser. All material submitted for publication is considered to be the sole property of the advertiser. Sophie Woman’s Magazine LLC’s publishers, staff, and other persons involved in the creation, production, or delivery of the magazine (in whatever format) or its content, do not assume any liability or responsibility for the accuracy, completeness, or usefulness of any information provided in the magazine, nor shall they be liable for any direct, indirect, incidental, special, consequential, or punitive damages arising out of the use of the magazine. *************************************************

pg 4 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | May 2016

Message from the Heart

Reaching Your Full Potential

Sophisticated Women

Girlfriends in God

The Front Porch

Blackberry Festival

In Whose Shade?

Recipe for Life

A Bible & A Bride

Dreaming of Childhood Fun

He Said, She Said

Of Sunflowers and Second Chances

Celebrate the Wondrous, Joyous June

My future Wore a Clerical Collar

Shutterbuggerz Submitted by Simply Ronda Photography

Submitted by Mayberry Photography

Submitted by Cricket Johnson at Lightshine Images

Submitted by Kathy Riddle Photography

www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 5

REACHING YOUR FULL POTENTIAL: Life Flows Out of IDENTITY by Kim Fletcher, Life Coach, Speaker, Author

“If you discover your purpose before clarifying your identity, your purpose will become your identity. One day, that purpose will fail to fulfill you because you are meant to be more than what you do.” Kim Fletcher Identity has been coming up a lot lately in my world. I have clients who long for it and I have personally been on a journey to greater understand my own unique IDENTITY.

The quote above is fresh and original. It flowed from my heart and out in the form of words as I encouraged my newest spiritual daughter this week.

Herein lays a pitfall to avoid in your own life. Our culture places value (and often judgment) on what we do or don’t do. We think highly of those who hold degrees and jobs such as attorney or physician while we look down on a person who is homeless. We have PURPOSE and ROLES on a pedestal while we actually understand very little about true identity.

A few years back, I had the honor of co-authoring a book with my business coaching client and good friend, Harold Elmore. He and I talked before the manuscript was crafted about how we both long to live our lives from a place of IDENTITY, allowing purpose to flow out of our unique being rather than having our purpose substitute for an incomplete or undiscovered identity. You will find numerous books on bookstore shelves on goal setting and living with purpose, yet you can hardly find anything written on the importance of our deepest and truest inner identity. When we wrote The Tension Point, part of our mission was to open people’s eyes to the magic that occurs when you BEGIN by first knowing WHO YOU ARE and WHOSE YOU ARE. pg 6 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | June 2016

We were created by a magnificent and Holy Creator for an equally magnificent destiny. Despite this extraordinary fact, many people live their days as if their existence does not matter. Many live to increase their possessions and get that next promotion. Many feel that they lack significance because they can’t afford the newest trinkets and toys. I came to realize that expensive cars and the big house were actually hindering my identity. The more I discover about who I am and what I exist to accomplish, the less I want things and the more I want greater freedom from things so I can invest that freedom in helping others discover their own unique life path. The purpose-focused life always needs to do more, accomplish more and own more to find significance. I know I have significance because I have been marked with inner beauty and value that reflects my Creator. The more I know my Creator and myself, the less I need and the more I want to invest all that God has placed inside of me into others.

I now live in a tiny house and drive an imperfect car. The financial freedom found in that place allowed me to turn down a new client this past week who might have paid me for coaching. Instead, I heard God whisper that she needed a mother’s heart more than she needed a coach. I was able to offer that place in my heart and my life out of the overflow of knowing who I am and what I have to offer.

My house is shrinking and my family is growing. My possessions are dwindling and my heart is exploding with significance and joy. I now live to freely pour my heart full of life experiences, wisdom, joy and hope into those God brings my way.

I encourage you today to take a deep look at your life. Are you hiding behind the things you own while wishing your life had more purpose? Do you feel fulfilled or empty at the end of most days? Do you tend to draw other people near or do you tend to keep people at arm’s length? Do you love who you are actively becoming? As you begin to define yourself by your God-given importance, you will find that you bring others closer as material possession and titles lose their hold on your heart. One of our key tension points is learning to press past the temporary significance of external accomplishments and begin living out of the overflow of Living Water that can only flow from within your heart. Enjoy and embrace the journey! Kim Fletcher learned a few years ago that a “FLETCHER” is an arrow maker. This is fitting as she launches clients toward their true IDENTITY. As a coach and leader of global impact, Kim seeks less to make a difference as she shares principles of true and lasting transformation to individuals and groups internationally. Contact her directly to purchase a signed copy of The Tension Point by emailing her at: kimfletchercoach@aol.com.

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SAre Bold! Women... ophisticated

By Nicole Greer, PPCC Founder and Principle Coach at Vibrant Coaching

eing bold is easy. Bold is defined by Merriam Webster as a willingness to take risks. The character trait of boldness does not develop. It is in you at birth.

Think about the insatiable curiosity of babies. They stretch, wiggle, grasp, and desire to taste anything in their path. Think about how quickly toddlers demand what they want. They light up with delight, squeal, and wave their arms frantically to signal what they desire. Think about the enthusiasm of a preschooler who explores one activity after another in their classroom unashamed to declare their territory, their role, and their intentions. When you were young, you had this unbridled energy. You jumped in and explored the world around you. But as you grew older, perhaps experiences with people, places and things started to shape your world view. What you once thought was yours to scale may have scared you or even scarred you. Life’s challenges can supress your bold nature creating a cautious, conforming, and… dare I say it… cowardly life. Don’t you wish someone had told you that you were bold from the beginning? Life would have been so different. If only you had known that bold was inside you and that your only responsibility was to control how you used it. Instead of letting life affect you, you could have stood in the perspective that you have an effect on your life, the lives around you, and even the lives of people you may never meet. Being bold is still a possibility for you. Like at the beginning of your life, it can even be easy if you read, realize, and respond to three things. #1 You only have one life to live. Your dreams will lie dormant if you are not willing to take one next right step toward them. It is better to have to say “Oops!” than to say, “What if?” Wouldn’t you rather die trying than wind-up in regret?

pg 8 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | June 2016

#2 You have a unique form of genius. You have skills, talents, gifts, experiences, personality, and character that collectively can influence change in our world. You can not convince me differently. Your life matters and there’s a dark place that needs your genius. Those ideas, that light bulb above your head, must illuminate the world around you. The boldest actions for a sophisticated woman is to love herself, be herself and shine amongst those who never believed she could. You will turn out ordinary if you are not careful. Isn’t true humility owning your place in the world and taking full responsibility for that which is yours to do? #3 Your life can be vibrant if you pursue the things that bring you to life. Erada Svetlana, a bold sophisticated editorial photographer, states “If it’s both terrifying and amazing then you should definitely pursue it.” I agree. Helen Keller believed this too. She declared, ‘Life is a daring adventure or nothing at all.” Perhaps, Eleanor Roosevelt said it best, “Well behavied women rarely make history.” It doesn’t matter who said it best, what really matters is that you go boldly. You know the idiom “Get a life!” This is something you say to someone who is living a small, dull,boring life. If that is you, I want to encourage you to do just that. Be bold. Get a life. A life you love.

Here’s to a bold woman. May you know one. May you be one. May you lead one.

At its deepest level, working with a coach frees you to identify your birthright gifts, discern your deepest passions, and fulfill your highest purpose. A coach can pry you off dead center. As Principal Coach for Vibrant Coaching and Workshop Leader for The Lydia Group, LLC, a collaboration of individuals focused on work, life and spiritual growth, Nicole is on a mission to impact, energize, and influence people to lead a Vibrant Life by engaging the possibilities. As a life and business coach and workshop leader, Nicole views her role as a conduit to release all that you want to achieve. www.thevibrantcoach.com/www.thelydiagroup.com

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You Are Who God Says You Are by Sharon Jaynes

Today’s Truth

See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! (1 John 3:1 NIV)

Friend to Friend

I became a Christian when I was a teenager. But even after I made a commitment to follow Christ, feelings of inferiority, insecurity, and inadequacy clung to me like a spider’s sticky web. The dirge of “I’m not good enough” was a song I couldn’t get out of my head. The lies of the enemy created limitations in my life. They were the barbed wire that fenced me in and kept God’s best at bay.

The problem was, I had no idea who I was, what I had, or where I was as a child of God. Oh, I understood that I was going to go to heaven when I left this earth, but what I was supposed to do until I got there had me stumped. I felt that I was always disappointing God, and I was certainly a disappointment to myself.I tried the best I could to be the best I could be, but always fell short.

Eventually I joined the ranks of thousands of Christians before me who settled in the land of in-between: saved from my Egypt—the penalty of sin in the hereafter, but worlds away from my Promised Land— experiencing the abundant life in the here and now. I settled into a stagnant faith, a safe faith, the stuck faith with other defeated believers who falsely saw themselves through a filter of past sins and failures, rather than through the lens of their new identity as a child of God. After high school I went to college where I met and married an awesome Christian man. About four years later, I became a mom. Life was good, except for this termite-like gnawing in my gut that I just didn’t quite measure up to all the other church moms with their smiling faces. (I wonder if you’ve ever felt that way too.) I walked around with the fear that one day I would be found out—that one day folks would figure out that I wasn’t all I was cracked up to be. I lived under an undefined self-imposed standard of approval.

Childhood echoes of “you’re so ugly” and “what’s wrong with you” and “you can’t do anything right” left me feeling congenitally flawed. I sat in Bible study groups like someone in a hospital waiting room: hoping for the best but expecting the worst. My greatest fear was that I’d be no closer to being free of the insecurity than I was before the study began.

When I was in my mid-thirties, I sat under the teaching of an older woman in my church, Mary Marshal Young. She opened my eyes to the truths in Scripture about who I was, what I had, and where I was (my position) as a child of God. I had read those verses scattered throughout Scripture before, but when she encouraged me to cluster them together into one list, God began a new work in my heart. You are a saint. You are chosen. You are dearly loved. You are holy.

These truths were right there on the pages of my Bible in black and white and a few in red.

pg 10 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | June 2016

You are reconciled through Christ’s life. You are justified by Christ’s blood. You are free from condemnation through Christ’s death. You have the mind of Christ. You can do all things through Christ. I knew the verses were the infallible Word of God, but I felt rather squeamish hearing them, reading them, believing them. They didn’t feel right. They didn’t sound right. They made me downright uncomfortable. And all the while I was studying about my true identity, the devil taunted me with accusations. Who do you think you are? A saint? Are you kidding? This stuff might be true for some people, but it certainly is not true about you. One day God asked me an important question—one that He is asking you right now. Who are you going to believe?

I was at a crossroads, one you might be standing at this very moment. Was I going to believe God and begin seeing myself as God saw me, or was I going to continue believing the lies of the enemy and the echoes of my past? Was I going to remain stuck in a stagnant faith because I was too insecure to take a step toward the abundant life that Jesus had promised, or was I going to march confidently around the walls of my inadequacies until they came tumbling down?

Finally, I was sick and tired of being sick and tired. “God, I’m going to believe I am who You say I am,” I prayed. “I don’t feel it. I can barely think it. But I’m going to believe Your Word is true for me and about me.” And that’s what I’m challenging you to do today. Let go of your insecurities and take hold of your true identity. Will you join me? If so, click over to my Facebook page and say, “I’m taking hold!”

Let’s Pray

Heavenly Father, thank You for choosing me to be your child. Today, I am choosing to believe that I am who You say that I am—a holy, dearly loved, child of Yours who is equipped by You, empowered by the Holy Spirit, and enveloped in Jesus Christ. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Now It’s Your Turn

Have you noticed that it is easier to believe what God says about Himself than what God says about you? Jesus said, “I am the light of the world” (John 8:12). We read those words and shout, “Amen! Hallelujah! Woo-hoo!” But He also said, “YOU are the light of the world (Matt. 5:14). Hmmm. Not a lot of shouting going on with that one. So which is it? Both! Are you going to believe what Jesus said is true about you? Write down these three truths on an index card and make them yours today. I am the salt of the earth. Matthew 5:13 I am the light of the world. Matthew 5:14 I am completely forgiven. Ephesians 1:7

More from the Girlfriends Today’s devotion was taken from my new book, Take Hold of the Faith you Long For: Let Go, Move Forward, Live Bold. A mediocre, mundane faith is not your destiny! In Take Hold of the Faith You Long For, I reveal the most common reasons we get stuck in our Christian faith. I show you how to break free of all that holds you back, move forward with all that God promises, and live the adventurous faith of bold believing. It’s time to leave behind feelings of inferiority, insecurity, and inadequacy that hold you hostage and take hold of the mountain-moving faith God intends. Let’s uncover untapped sources of confidence and courage, and see how to move from simply knowing the truth to actually living it out boldly in a life marked by true freedom and expectancy. It’s time to get UNSTUCK!

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5/16/16 1:10:03 PM www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 11

Front The

Porch

There are some special things that happen along the way in life. One of them is finding out how other family members have developed the love of porches. I am especially delighted that my daughter has bought a house and the big deal about this house was the front porch. Do you possibly think that could have anything to do with maturity? Without a doubt, I know she would tell me no but I suspect it does. This particular house sits back off the road and has a beautiful large front lawn. They face a fairly heavy traveled road but sits far enough away to enjoy it and still have that peaceful setting. So what is it about a porch that draws people to them? There could be a multitude of reasons but I think one of the things that makes them appealing to is the “slowness” that is perceived. In our hustle bustle world, just the thought of going to sit on the porch for a few minutes can bring you a level of relaxation. That is most definitely true for me and I know it is showing signs of truth for my daughter. There is no better place to watch children play, or climb trees or play hide and seek. You can bet the porch will be home base. The best time ever is when family has gathered, sipping sodas, telling stories from the past, present or maybe even dreams of the future. It is like Heaven when you get to catch a breeze, to really take in what I call a “God-Breeze”. I especially love it when my husband comes home from work and finds me on the porch. He grabs a glass of tea and for just a few moments all the cares of the world are gone. A porch has a way of creating memories on its own. I remember when my precious cousin who is deceased now, fell off the porch, cut his finger and it was crooked the rest of his life. It was my starting point of learning to ride a bike. For another cousin of mine and me, it was where we waited for that BIG OLD BUS that would take us to our first day of school.

pg 12 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | June 2016

by Judy Smith

Don’t waste this moment. What kind of memories do you have? Maybe it is where that wretched, unworthy hooligan asked for your daughter’s hand in marriage. You gave in and said yes. You didn’t lose a daughter, you gained a son. So now I have to confess and tell you my very favorite thing. It is where I can steal away and NOT see any of the things that need to be done on the inside. Plus, an added benefit is that sitting on the porch lowers your blood pressure. I don’t really have any statistics from any doctors to back that but I know it works for me. When I do not have to think about cleaning up the kitchen, I am sure mine drops a good 10 points. So whether it is five minutes or fifty minutes, it is so worth it. So, sweet daughter, get ready because I KNOW you want us to join you on yours! Maybe we will tell lots of jokes so here is a porch joke to get you started. An eager, but less than bright, young entrepreneur decides to go into the painting business. So he wanders into the rich part of town, paint brush in hand, and knocks at the door of a large house. "Good day, sir. I was wondering if you had any painting you need done." The owner of the house, a rich man by any standard, looks speculatively at the painter. He perceives a vibrant entrepreneurial spirit, which reminds him of his own ambition in his younger days. "Hmmm. Yes, I think my porch needs a coat or two of paint." The eager young painter rushes off around the side of the house... Several hours later, he returns to the front door, his clothes dripping paint, and knocks again. "Sir, I've finished! But I have to tell you, that wasn't a porch, it was a Ferrari."

Shutterbuggerz Submitted by Jessica Fortenberry Photography

Submitted by Felicia Goodnight

Submitted by Jaime Maynor

Submitted by Charismatic Captures

www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 13

July 8 & 9, 2016 Main Street Downtown Lenoir

Friday July 8th PRE – HEAT PARTY 6 -‐ 10 p.m. 6 p.m. 7 p.m. 7 p.m. 8:30 p.m.

BlackBEERy Garden on the Square in Lenoir featuring local Caldwell County breweries. Blackberry Princess Pageant Preliminaries Front Porch Pickin’ Competition Blackberry Recipe Contests Glow Run 5K and Fun Run

Saturday July 9th Festival 10 a.m. 10:00 a.m. 10:30 – 3:00 11:15 a.m.

NC Blackberry Princess Pageant Finals Blackberry Festival Blood Drive Youth & Adult Eating Contests Noon Presentation of Colors Ceremony 12:15 Colossal Cobbler Parade Brigade 12:30 World’s Largest Patchwork of Blackberry Cobbler FREE cobbler while supplies last! 1:00 – 4:00 pm Live Music On The Square Plus – Vendors, Food, Children’s Activities, Blackberries and MORE

It’s a BERRY good time! www.NCBlackberryFestival.com Main St. Lenoir, NC 28645

Caldwell County was founded 175 years ago in 1841. On July 9 there will be 175 days remaining in 2016 How better to Kick Off the last 175 days of this 175th Year - “BLACKBERRY COBBLER FOR ALL”

pg 14 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | June 2016

15TH ANNUAL

JUL

, 20

Youngsters and the young at heart might say they attend the festival to see the crowning of the Little Miss. Blackberry Princess. And don’t forget the traditional children’s inflatables and the ever popular train. This year we are adding children’s book vendors and more food and beverage choices. Cool frozen blackberry drinks, ice cream and even a vendor with a desert that was featured on The Food Network will be in attendance. Some of the locals would say you should attend the NC Blackberry Festival so you don’t miss the “Blackberry Eating Contest.” You have to stand back and watch quick, because the competition is stiff. To be fair, each blackberry box contains the exact number of berries and as they say…”The fastest mouth wins!”

re you curious about what makes the largest festival in Caldwell County an event you don’t want to miss? Some would say it’s the “World’s Largest Patchwork of Blackberry Cobbler.” Right here in Caldwell County we create a work of art for which no other community can boast. The assembling of over 225 cobblers from local cooks is quite a feat. Bakers work together and bring their homemade blackberry cobblers to town bright and early on the morning of the festival. Then, around the noon hour, after the Presentation of Colors and a speech by Mayor Joe Gibbons, the cobblers are paraded into the square via the “Colossal Cobbler Parade Brigade!” Crowds gather and you will not want to miss the FREE cobbler distributed while supplies last! Needless to say, it goes pretty quick. You can even pick up the simple recipe at the information booth on the square in Lenoir. Lots and lots of big beautiful juicy ripe blackberries are for sale in the “Berry Market” on South Main Street. The NC Blackberry and Raspberry Growers Association are on hand and will be selling their fruit. And don’t miss the local Farmers Markets selling locally grown veggies, fruits and flowers.

Scores of festival attendees come to hear the variety of live bands and musical entertainment throughout the day. Some will have seen us on Facebook and Twitter and want to check out our social media tent with free charging stations. No matter the reason, you’ll be glad you attended the 15th Annual NC Blackberry Festival in Lenoir. It’s a BERRY good time! For more information call the Caldwell Chamber of Commerce at 828-726-0616 or visit www.NCBlackberryFestival.com.

Many attend the festival to see the over 150 vendors displaying their crafts and creativity. Jewelry, candles, pottery, yarn and fabric creations, paintings, wood crafters and much more will be interspersed with local downtown businesses and area agencies. Commercial vendors will be sharing information and several have drawings for free giveaways. Before you leave the festival you’ll have the opportunity to give the gift of life at the blood drive. That’s right; two buses from the American Red Cross will be prepared to collect donations. The temperature always seems to rise the second Saturday in July…why some say we are the “hottest little festival around.”

www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 15

Whose

by Mary Felkins

Shade?

The Lord watches over you - the Lord is your shade at your right hand. Psalm 121:5a

Being raised in Texas, I’m no wuss when it comes to heat. It’s just that sometimes, well, too much is too much. ~At the beach you might find me beneath an expansive umbrella, feeling (and maybe even looking) like a slightly charred marshmallow in a one-piece. ~When pulling weeds, I might skip-walk to the front porch, down a bottle of water, and maybe even call it a day. ~At the park, I’ll search for the nearest oak tree - bench or no bench. ~When shopping downtown Union Square, I’ll divert my steps toward businesses with awnings, perhaps step inside one to feel the brush of cool AC on my skin. ~And when in Israel, I’ll go down to Egypt… Hold up a minute. I’ve never even been to Israel. Or Egypt, for that matter. Have I? “Woe to the obstinate children,” declares the Lord, “to those who… go down to Egypt without consulting me; who look for help to Pharaoh’s protection, to Egypt’s shade for refuge. Isaiah 30:1-2 The Israelites were in need, troubled, oppressed, yet, despite God’s ready and adequate provision, they sought relief in someone and in some place far removed from God. They’d chosen to go down to Egypt, a pagan country. It sure appeared to offer more, to be the answer, to fulfill a need, but was, in fact, utterly useless. Worse, running down to Egypt for shade added the hefty burden of shame and disgrace to Israel’s original pile of complaints. Pharaoh’s protection will be to your shame, Egypt’s shade will bring you disgrace. Isaiah 30:3 (Pssst. That shame thing? It’s no easy burden to shake off) Basically, they’d chosen idolatry, a mis-guided trust in anything or anyone aside from the one true God. They’d become unwilling to listen to instruction.

pg 16 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | June 2016

Now, I’ve never considered myself an idolater. You won’t find a totem pole in any corner of my house. And isn’t idolatry the practice of those people anyway? The ones who don’t attend church? Or who repeatedly avoid eye contact with the homeless guy? Who disregard God and fill their heads with carnal knowledge for hours in front of the 60-inch, flat screen T.V.? Mere lovers of self-indulgence, utterly dependent on diet sodas to make it through the day? Yeah. Those people, the Egypt’s shade-seekers. But, lemme see here. Where have I run for cover when the heat of daily life is turned up? In whose shade have I sought refuge? You (God, not Egypt) have been… a shelter from the storm and a shade from the heat. Isaiah 25:4a In my attempt to navigate through life and figure stuff out apart from God’s counsel, maybe I’ve inadvertently headed south and landed in foreign country. Egypt’s shade. Yet the Lord. Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; therefore He will rise up to show you compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for him! …How gracious He will be when you cry for help! As soon as He hears, He will answer you. Isaiah 30:18-19 But why does God long to be gracious to a wandering, shade-seeker like me? Why does He rise up and show me compassion? (vs. 18) Because I am His bride. And just as my own husband won’t tolerate finding me within the shade of another man, neither does my fiercely jealous God. Like an apple tree among the trees of the forest is my beloved among the young men. I delight to sit in his shade. Song of Songs 2:3a Should I find myself loading up the back of a camel, headed for shade - refuge, counsel, pleasure - in all the wrong places, God’s grace and compassion will rescue me. He may even grow me a vine like He did for Jonah: Then the Lord God provided a vine and made it grow up over Jonah to give shade for his head to ease his discomfort, and Jonah was very happy about the vine. Jonah 4:6 Looks like a fierce sun is rising overhead. Better seek shelter…in God’s shade. Mary Albers Felkins is a former Registered and Licensed Dietitian turned writer. Her first novel, a contemporary Christian romance, is currently under contract with Prism Book Group (www.prismbookgroup.com). She considers scripture the most alluring romance ever written. Married to Bruce Felkins, together they have four (adolescent to young adult-sized) arrows in their quiver. She can be bribed to take a break from writing if chocolate is involved in the negotiation process. For stories that stir the soul, Mary cordially invites you to her website, www.maryfelkins.com

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www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 17

Recipes for ife

by Emily Wickham

Food for the Body Apple Crumble (From the kitchen of Joy Tilton and inspired by Robin’s recipe at http:// bit.ly.1T8ZvSG 5-6 apples, peeled and sliced 1 c. white sugar 2-½ Tbsp. cornstarch 1 Tbsp. butter 1 c. water ½ tsp. cinnamon ¼ tsp. nutmeg ¼ tsp. cardamom

¼ tsp. ground cloves ¾ c. butter 1 c. packed brown sugar 1 ¾ c. all-purpose flour ½ tsp. baking soda 1 tsp. salt 1 ½ c. rolled oats ¼ c. chopped pecans ¼ c. chopped walnuts

Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

Mix apple slices, white sugar, 1 Tbsp. butter, water, and spices in saucepan. Cook until the apples become soft. Add the cornstarch, stirring and cooking apple mixture until thickened. Set aside.

Cream butter and sugar. Mix in flour, baking soda, and salt, stirring well. Add the oats and nuts. Press ¾ of the mixture into the bottom of a 13x9½x2 inch greased pan. Spread with apple filling.

On top, sprinkle the remaining crumb mixture (as well as additional chopped pecans if desired). Bake for 25-30 minutes or until dessert is lightly browned. Cut into bars while warm and remove from pan.

A Prayer for God’s Blessing Loving Father in heaven, You listen and care, showing Your love time and time again. You’re my faithful Father who meets all my needs. I confess my immaturities in the faith and thank You for being such a good, good Father. Please deepen my awareness and appreciation of Your daily provision on my behalf. In Jesus’ precious name, Amen.

Food for the Soul After a pleasant meal together, the apple crumble appeared. A delightful combination of oats, sugar, apples, and spices, it was slightly warm and ready to be topped with vanilla ice cream. What more could we desire as dinner guests? Even though I eat dessert sparingly, I couldn’t allow this

pg 18 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | June 2016

confection to pass me by. The flavor and texture equaled pure yum as I spooned its richness into my mouth. Our hosts, a dear couple from church, welcomed my husband and me, two of our children, and my dad into their home. Their hospitality ministered to us in more ways than filling our bellies—it nurtured our unbreakable bond in Christ. In a culture starved for genuine connection, we tasted some of its sweetness together. Family. God the Father joins His children together as His family. What a beautiful blessing. Everyone who believes in Jesus’ name receives the right to become God’s child. As a result, all who believe in Christ become brothers and sisters … family. “But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, even to those who believe in His name.” John 1:12, Nasb The Father’s family originated in love and demonstrates His love. Every member of Christ’s body belongs to God’s family as one who is identified and known by Him. “See how great a love the Father has bestowed upon us, that we should be called children of God; and such we are…” 1 John 3:1 Our Father sees us equally. We are His. “The Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name.” Ephesians 3:14, 15 And when we have needs? Our Father provides. Ever watchful and prepared to supply, He takes pleasure in hearing our requests. He loves when we need Him. He is there. “Your Father knows what you need, before you ask Him.” Matthew 6:8 “Every good thing bestowed and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation, or shifting shadow.” James 1:17 A heavenly Father and His family—we gain amazing blessings in Christ! While we celebrate our earthly dads this month, let’s remember our Father in heaven. He’s the One who inspires godly fathers to love well, sacrifice much, provide properly, and so on. He’s the One who created families and unites their hearts in love. He’s the Giver, and we’re the receivers. Dear one, do you belong to His family? He welcomes all who trust Christ as Savior. As a believer, do you cherish your place in His family? He knows and values you, blessing you with brothers and sisters in Christ. Let’s treasure our Everlasting Father who loves us so well. Love to you in Christ, and until next time, that’s a Recipe for Life… Emily Wickham gently reaches women’s hearts as she teaches God’s Word. Through various writing endeavors, she encourages readers into close relationship with God. Additionally she hosts and speaks at the Connecting with Christ Conference. Visit www.proclaiminghimtowomen.com to read Emily’s blog. Connect with her via social media: www.facebook.com/emilywickham.author www.twitter.com/emilywickhamPH Emily, grateful to God for His blessings, enjoys life with her loving husband and children in western NC.

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A Bible

a Bride by Debbie Roberson

t was as if He reached down that evening and gently sprinkled Susan with an extra helping of beauty. You see, He knew that she would be leaving us for Heaven soon, and so on this special night God arranged for our Susan to be captured in time at her very loveliest. The blonde highlights in her light brown hair were like sunlight filtering through trees in the morning. Susan’s friend Keri curled the shoulder length tresses and meticulously pinned them up into a stunning bridal updo. A delicate headband of small white flowers was then nestled gently among the curls. Susan rarely wore much makeup, but this was a special day. Keri expertly applied just the right amount of eyeliner and smoky eye shadow. The flawless makeup was finished off with just a kiss of pink blush and lipstick. The end result was the timeless face of a princess. With hair and makeup done, we loaded my car with the wedding gown, crinoline, shoes and jewelry. Armed with hair spray, touchup lipstick and blush, we left for the studio which was only a few miles from our home. Susan’s future mother-in-law Beth, my Mother, and Susan’s maid of honor met us there. We all crowded into the small dressing room to help her get ready for her bridal portrait. Her joy was contagious and suddenly we were all laughing and giggling. Susan stood in front of the full length mirror, wearing just her strapless bra and crinoline slip. Beth put her hands on her hips and beamed as she went on and on about Susan’s tiny waist. I could tell how much she loved my daughter, and it made me glad. Time stood still for a moment as I watched my little girl transform into a vision of exquisite beauty. The tank style, white satin A-line designer gown set off her tan. The chiffon skirt and chapel-length train were embellished with lace and tiny pearls and the skirt fell like a cloud over the crisp crinoline slip. A row of tiny, white satin covered buttons ran down the back of the dress. With trembling hands, I fastened a simple strand of pearls around Susan’s slender neck. Her dainty pearl teardrop earrings accented the necklace. She was ready … and it was a moment of pure perfection. We all walked out of the dressing room and into the studio. Marvin was Susan’s photographer, but also our good friend. He smiled a big

pg 20 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | June 2016

smile when he saw her float into the room, and he began to snap pictures one after another. I was overcome as I watched her posing with playful self-confidence. Her joy completely filled the room. No one would have believed that just the year before, she had undergone two major surgeries and been delivered from a frightening brush with death. God had spared her life and she was getting married in two months. It seemed to me as if all the Earth was singing songs of praise and thanksgiving for what God had done for my Susan. Marvin finished all of the poses that he had planned to shoot, and almost as an afterthought, he asked us if we could think of another pose to finish up the session. We didn’t know at the time that his question would be the seed of a precious gift from the Holy Spirit. Beth said, “You know, I wish you could take a picture of Susan with a Bible.” With excitement, my Mother quickly said, “I have my Daddy’s Bible in the car!” Daddy Robert was my maternal grandfather and Susan’s greatgrandfather. He was affectionately known by his grandchildren and great-grandchildren as Daddy Robert. He was tall and lanky. He wore glasses and he was bald on top of his head. He was fun loving and he loved to talk. I never saw him angry or grumpy. He loved to laugh and he loved to love. Mother stepped back into the studio with Daddy Robert’s worn black Bible in her hands. Just the sight of it made me remember his laugh, and I could almost taste the banana sandwiches he used to make for me when I was a little girl. Daddy Robert had a stroke in his later years and was bed-ridden for some time before his death. Susan was just a little girl at that time, and she spent many days at Daddy Robert and Mama Ruth’s house with my Mother when I was working. Susan loved to snuggle up next to him in his hospital bed and watch his favorite show - The Price is Right. She heard Daddy Robert say the blessing before meals. She also heard him say with loving appreciation after every meal – “This is the best I ever had”. Daddy Robert planted seeds of God’s love in Susan’s little heart. He

passed away when she was only six years old. She never forgot him. I was so thankful that God gave Beth the idea of the Bible – and I was also thankful that He arranged for Mother to have Daddy Robert’s Bible in her car. I knew in my heart that this particular shot would be a treasure. Susan sat on a stool behind a tall table draped in white fabric. The back drop was totally white as well. Marvin took Daddy Robert’s Bible and seemingly without any thought or plan - with one hand - he flopped it open it and sat it on the table in front of Susan. She propped her elbows on the table in front of the Bible. With her hands folded against her chin, head bowed and eyes cast down as if in prayer, Marvin took the final picture. Just as I thought, that particular pose would become one of our favorites, and it was stunning in it’s 16 x 20 frame. My sister Sharon said, “I wonder what scripture the Bible was opened to?” With magnifying glass in hand, she examined the portrait closely. She was able to discern that it was opened to Isaiah chapter 49. She quickly got my Mother’s Bible, opened it to Isaiah 49, and began to read. She smiled as she read verse 18 and discovered that God had arranged for Daddy Robert’s Bible to be opened to scripture about a bride. What a precious treasure she had discovered!

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I have thought about Isaiah 49:18 many times since Susan went to Heaven. The words are a sweet message from God for me – a message about Susan’s life and the impact it had for God’s Kingdom. She adored children and would have been a wonderful mother. It was not in His plan for her to have children here on earth, but in Heaven Jesus will lift up her eyes and she will look around and see all the children of God who have been drawn closer to Him because of her. That thought gives me great comfort. In my mind’s eye, I imagine that Daddy Robert was right behind Jesus waiting excitedly to greet Susan when she got to Heaven. I’m sure that he welcomed her with a big bear hug and a huge Daddy Robert smile as he said,

“Susan, this will surely be the best you ever had!”

Debbie Roberson is a wife and the mother of a grown married son. She is also the mother of a beautiful daughter who now lives in Heaven. She is a lover of Jesus with a desire to encourage and inspire others through the words that He puts in her heart.

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Dreaming

of Childhood Fun! by Susan Guest, ASID

any years ago as a child, I would spend hours outside playing with siblings, cousins, or friends. We would be out of the house from morning until the fireflies appeared at night. Our activities included collecting fossils and arrowheads, swimming in the man-made lake nearby, tormenting the mean bull in the field behind the house, water skiing or fishing, and playing a game of horse with the basketball. We would spend hours digging in the Mississippi red clay- creating forts and tunnels or in the forest making life-size floor plans by placing sticks on the ground. My cousins had a two story tree house where we would spend summer days playing or shelling beans-working for a reward of a new toy. Some of us ran behind the Deet bug spray truck every week-this explains why we are so weird now! There were no computers or video games and we were used to the heat of the summer days and creating our own fun. For many of us, those childhood memories are so vivid, carefree, and fun. As adults, designers and architects aim to recreate these experiences in our work and relaxation. One of my favorite TV shows is “Treehouse Masters”. This program features tree houses of all styles and designs built all over the country. Some have resembled a bee hive or birds nest, another mimicked a boat. Any crazy idea that the owner has is incorporated in the design-any fond memory or lifelong dream. Another trend that brings back childhood fun is the tiny house. Many of us had a play house or fort made from cardboard appliance boxes as kids. Tiny homes are a big trend right now all over the country as people try to simplify their lives, decrease their living expenses, leave less of a carbon footprint, and have more time for fun. They are like adult play houses. With less time spent on cleaning and maintenance, tiny house owners can spend their time and energy on things that make them happy. At market this past April, I found glimpses of this desire for more fun in products, fabrics and accessories. In one showroom, indoor swings hung from the ceiling and made me wish for a glass of lemonade and a tomato sandwich. Digital and fractal designs were all over market-and reminded me of crossword puzzles and Sudokus. Real and faux fur was everywhere-on pillows and ottomans with animal styled feet and on bear shaped rugs of all sizes. The rugs made you want to lay on them and take a mid-day nap!

pg 22 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | June 2016

Global designs and colors shown this market brought back memories of sitting in the back yard under a tree with a really great book. Tales of far-away places that I might or might not get to actually visit were in these books. Some places were real and others were totally imaginary. Moroccan tile motifs were everywhere at market. Bright hues of pink, yellow, orange, red, bright blue, and teal were shown on rugs, sofas, and accessories in every showroom. These colors and designs would brighten your house and take you to a different land every time you walk in the door! The tropical invasion was another look that brought back childhood memories of reading books from all over the world. Huge banana and palm leaves were evident in fabrics and plant arrangements. Lush tropical florals were shown in fabrics and rugs all over High Point. One trend seminar I attended by product designer, Stacy Garcia, attributed the tropical trend to the fascination with 1940s Cuba. Everyone is either traveling there or knows someone who is. Because our world can be so distressing, many of us want to go to our backyard, climb into a tree house, and drink an orange soda with a moon pie or Twinkie. There are so many things in our lives that we cannot control. To a certain extent, we can control our home or personal environment. We can hang that indoor swing in our sunroom or have a rope ladder leading to the loft. We can surround ourselves with things that remind us of far-away places even if we can’t travel there. We also can add touches of design in our lives that remind us of happy times from our childhood. Mason jar chandeliers bring back fond memories of catching fireflies. Bean bag chairs remind many of us of high school. The fuzzy faux fur rug brings back spend the night parties and sleeping bags on tall shag carpet. The sky is the limit in what how we can bring fun and fond memories to life today. Go ahead-live a little!

Susan Guest, ASID is an award-winning interior designer in Hickory and owner of Guest Interiors, LLC. She is one of the designers featured in “Spectacular Homes of the Carolinas”, found in high-end bookstores around the country. President of ASID Carolinas. For more information, visit www.guestinteriors.com.

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He Said, She Said

Less is More by David and Amy Washco

n this world of bigger, better, gotta have it now, it’s easy to get lost in your possessions. Big houses, big yards and big toys are often associated with the American dream and a perception of success. These luxuries in life are enjoyable, but can result in increased stress, large debt and loss of physical and mental downtime due to sheer maintenance. What would happen if you chose another path? Could you really opt out of the “stuff” game and decide that less is more? She Said: We worked so hard to make this house a home: hardwood floors, tile, landscaping, a pool for weekend enjoyment. Could we really give this up and downsize into a three bedroom apartment? With my company moving its headquarters in two years, the choices were complicated: 1. Sell our house and buy a house in the new city now which would require reverse commuting two hours a day for two years 2. Stay where we are and risk not being able to sell our house in two years due to a crowded seller’s market or 3. Sell now and rent for two years. My flexible and openminded family agreed we should rent for two years. Little did we know what that would cost us and what we would gain. Transitional housing was almost nonexistent. To rent a house close to the square footage we had was twice the cost of a mortgage and no pets were allowed. Three cats, two dogs, fish and hermit crabs were quickly narrowing our options. Rental homes we could afford that did allow pets were out of the school district or didn’t feel safe. After doing the math and taking the emotion out of the equation, we decided the three bedroom apartment in a nice safe complex with amenities was the way to go. There were hard decisions ahead of us. All of which had to be made in thirty days because we got an offer on our house and had to move. What to keep, what to sell and what to put in storage were the three buckets we lived in. With a chance to reinvent ourselves and start fresh, I had no problem filling those buckets. It was freeing and therapeutic to be faced with the reality that everything couldn’t and wouldn’t fit in our new world. He Said: I admit it. I almost fell into the trap once again that I mentor others to avoid. Your possessions and material items do not reflect your value. “Sell our house!” What will others think? Will

pg 24 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | June 2016

our friends think we hit hard times? Are we going backwards after living here for 12 years? So many memories and trials here, now what? I would like to say I avoided this trap on my own efforts. However, I was awakened to this potential downfall by my wife’s insight and having just returned from my sixth mission trip serving in Guatemala. You would have thought I would have learned from my first five trips that “less is more.” Ok, I did learn that, however, timing is everything. Returning from Guatemala earlier last month, I was reminded of one of the life lessons I learned: “the villagers live for survival, we tend to live for accumulation.” Yet, as they live for survival they are some of the happiest people I have come across on this planet. Somehow on the path to adulthood we get sucked into the belief that you find happiness from acquiring the things you desire. And the more you acquire the more enjoyment in life you will discover. The truth is, we have gained much more than we have given up in our recent downsizing. The decrease in time spent on house maintenance, cleaning and yard work has translated into more time with my wife and daughters, quiet time for appreciation of my blessings, and to serve my friends and community. Was it a worthwhile decision? Oh Yes. Did it come easy? No. However, the freedom we are experiencing is refreshing and rewarding. Are you trying to squeeze more than 24 hours in a day? It might not be the number of hours that’s the problem. Maybe it’s time to consider if you could gain more with less.

David and Amy Washco are survivors of divorce and serve as relationship advocates. With a sales and marketing background, they are married and live in Hickory, NC. David and Amy are parents to 18 year old Savannah and 10 year old Riley.

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Of Sunflowers and Second Chances

Article submitted by Gina Stearns

ver years of gardening, I have tried to grow sunflowers. I love their golden faces and perky petals. But for all of my efforts nothing ever sprouted. Nothing. So you can imagine my delight when one serendipitous sunflower appeared behind my garage. I was so elated; I couldn’t wait to announce it to my family. Though unseen from my patio, I proclaimed that it was out there, nevertheless, and it was mine. Days later, while watering my flowers, I had noticed another sunflower situated smackdab in front of my patio. As I peered at it, I was thrilled that I was doubly blessed now to have two sunflowers. But the closer I got, the more puzzled I became. What was this? The leaves looked limp and its poor petals withered. It was barely standing at attention, but more like I did after a day of pulling weeds. Then a sick feeling grew in my stomach. I realized that this flower was the very one behind the garage. As I looked towards the roots and newly furrowed soil, I immediately yelled, “Micah and Naomi!” MICAH!! NAOMI!! They emerged, curious and worried. “Did you do this?” I pointed to the pitiful plant. They slowly nodded not knowing how my anger would manifest itself. “How could you rip out my only sunflower? Do you know how long I have wanted sunflowers of my own? My voice cracked as I started to cry. By now they too were trembling in silent tears, full of regret and remorse. “Sorry , Mom. Yeah, we are so sorry.” As I shifted my attention from my selfish hurt feelings to their doleful faces, my disappointment dissipated. “Why would you do such a thing?” I gently inquired, holding the limp shriveled plant to punctuate the pathetic ends their erroneous efforts brought. Slowly and bravely Micah answered. “We did it for you,” his voice rose with hope. “Naomi and I wanted to plant it so you could see from the patio.” Suddenly my heart filled with compassion. They had such good intentions, but such sad results. It reminded me of Proverbs 14:12,”There is a way that appears to be right, but in the end it leads to death.” Though the lesson was for them, it also resonated within me. It reminded me of how I had initially raised my older daughters. As a new

pg 26 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | June 2016

Christian, I was so eager to please God that I thought the more rules, the better chance for righteousness to grow in them. The problem was that I became so legalistic, that I had choked the Life that God had placed in them. For me, it was more about their behavior, what could be seen by others. Just like Micah and Naomi’s efforts of moving my sunflower into dirt for better viewing, so too I was working on their outward appearance. I hadn’t realized that like the vibrant plant hidden behind the garage, the hearts of my kids couldn’t be seen as well. I have since learned that I should seek to sow seeds of love, speak life and truth into their hearts, and refresh them with winsome encouragement and a consistent, loving example. The Gospel of Grace gives genuine freedom and joy, so different from what I, in my ignorance, had instilled. Often I had looked outwardly perfect from stapling fake fruit of love peace and joy. Yet ironically, I was denying the Holy Spirit full access to my heart and mind. All I produced was frustration, bitterness, and exhaustion because my harvest was neither authentic nor sustaining. Only by the Spirit does true growth occur; I am learning to cooperate with Him. Another sweet message of my sunflower narrative is the joy of second chances. Micah and Naomi can attest to that, and so can I. A year later in the exact spot that they tried to replant it -- a new, more beautiful sunflower appeared. I sat there and wept at God’s grace to them and to me. Ultimately, I cannot explain the method by which our second sunflower made its resplendent arrival. But I do know that God was the one that caused it to grow right there where my kids wanted to see the first one. Neither came from my own efforts. It is a comfort to know that ours is a God of a hope and peace that comes from surrendering to Him. I had to admit I was wrong, even if my motives were right. Nevertheless, His goodness and compassion produced what I ultimately desired. Matthew 6:33 “But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” I can attest to that with my own life, a life full – of sunflowers and second chances.

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www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 27

Celebrate the

Wondrous, Joyous June by Jan McCanless

June is truly the month of celebrations; we have weddings, graduations, church picnics, not to mention Father’s Day, it’s just a wonderful time of year to celebrate anything. In our family, we also celebrate numerous June birthdays. This month, I’ll be traveling to Atlanta, Georgia to join in celebrating my own high school graduation, and, it is with some trepidation that I go. I have not been to one of my own reunions, and I thought this year , I’d go. Our graduation did not go smoothly, however, when over half my class, myself included, got food poisoning 3 days before the big event. We had gone to a senior class luncheon , gotten a hold of some bad beef, you know how teenagers eat, so, we ATE !! As we marched into the civic auditorium in Atlanta, our vice principal was there with spoon and paregoric to dose all of us. No way we would have made it through the ceremony otherwise. One of the sweetest June weddings I ever attended was for the daughter of a neighbor. Her groom was especially nervous, and you could see his knees shaking through the movement of the fabric in his trousers. Well, sir, came the time in the service when he had to repeat his vows to sweet little Vicky, and instead of taking her for his lawful wedded wife, he took her for his lawful bedded wife. Poor guy was so upset, he began to cry, then, he ended up sobbing, but, somehow,they made it through, and, I’m happy to say, they continue in their wedded bliss to this day, 40 years later. God must have known what He was doing when He created June, it’s such a happy month. So many lives change drastically during the month. A new beginning, new experiences, it’s hard to fathom them all. Where we live now, sometimes we can hear the roaring of the crowd at the football games, played from the high school stadium down the road, and graduation night always brings the usual assortment of shouting, horn blowing and laughter. I used to teach at that high school, and how well I remember the joy of the three family graduations I attended. One son and daughter marched into the stadium on a warm, clear night, the other son was relegated to the auditorium as rain pelted the grounds, and just about ruined everything that had already been set up for the outdoor ceremony. Wonderful memories, of a glorious time. I’m thinking now of all the grads this month, all the brides and grooms, and the years yet to come. I wish them well, and God speed. Most of all . I wish them God’s blessings in their life’s adventures. Hold tight and remember kids, that time and euphoria will never come again. As for you dads out there, may you have a happy, happy day.

pg 28 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | June 2016

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www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 29

My Future Wore A Clerical Collar by Mrs. Ashlee S. Mize

May, 26th 2014. That was the day that everything changed for me. Had I known what would follow perhaps I would have been a bit overwhelmed. But, as most things go my future was presented to me in a 3” x 3” thumbnail picture of a man in robes, a green stole around his neck, and he was preaching away at a pulpit. He was cute. It seemed that eHarmony hadn’t been such a waste after all. I deleted the other thumbnail pictures and sent the man in robes a “smile” across the vast chasm we call the “internet.” A few days went by of constantly checking to see if he had “smiled” back, but he didn’t seem very interested. As a woman, it’s much more difficult for me to put myself out there and it seemed that this guy wasn’t all that anxious to meet me and that dented my self esteem quite a bit. Then a simple “smile” came from the man in robes on June 21st. Again, I didn’t know that this was going to be my future right here just a click away. Rev. Gaven Mize was a pastor in Louisville, Kentucky, but for some reason his profile had been changed to “living in Hickory, North Carolina.” I needed to find out what that was about. We started talking on Facebook and I found out that he had just accepted a call to Augustana Lutheran Church in Hickory. I didn’t know where that was until I realized it was the old church on the hill with the chimes that rang over the old Krispy Kreme. He was currently living in Hickory and wanted to take me out to eat to get to know me. That was just fine with me.

Gaven called and we set up the date at the Station in downtown Hickory. He told me that he didn’t have what he called, “in between clothes” which meant we could either dress down or he would put on a nice shirt and tie. I chose the latter.

The day of the date arrived and I was standing outside of the Station waiting when he walked around the corner. He was wearing grey slacks, white shirt, plaid bow tie and a heavy wool coat on the first day of July in the North Carolina heat. So, of course I suggested that we eat outside on the patio. We were too nervous to eat the cauliflower fritters we had ordered and Gaven was sweating underneath the sun and pressure like he was taking a test. But, despite the nerves and all of it, we fell in love that day. Gaven and I had our first kiss by the Wells Fargo building. Some might not think it very romantic, but for us it was heaven on earth. We knew we were going to last. We knew forever awaited us. I knew he would ask me to marry him soon. He did. I I said, “Yes.” But, I didn’t know at that time that I wasn’t just saying, “Yes” to Gaven, I said “Yes” to the Church on the hill. On October 17th, 2015 I stood in my wedding dress as the front doors of Augustana Lutheran opened. Through the light I could see the man who I was about to take as my own; the good Reverend; my Gaven. At the altar of God we swapped our vows and plighted our troths. We were family. It was me and Gaven against the world. As the months have gone by I have realized that I didn’t just marry Gaven. On that day I didn’t just increase my family by one. I increased it by an entire church. Through their love and support, not just for Gaven, but for me, I knew I was home. I knew my future had come. And as we ride to church together every Sunday morning I think, “That thumbnail wasn’t too overwhelming after all.” In fact, the members of Augustana are my brothers and sisters, and I’m married to the preacher man. Our future can only become brighter.

pg 30 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | June 2016

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