Volume I I ssue II
A.Y. 2014-2015
November — March
This by far is the most intriguing cover of our literary folio. It is really true that a picture paints a thousand words. A single artwork communicates so many story, it transcends to everyone, it suggest countless conflicts, and propose so many endings –or the lack thereof. There are three ways on how i interpret this artwork, the woman is about to jump and kill herself, she stands at the edge of the cliff to behold the beauty of the setting sun (or the nature in general), or it’s just simply a cliff-hanger.
gone too far. But it is the reality, most people are like me. Then I come up with to the realization that being afraid is a drawback, the experience of living life to the fullest is what we are missing. What is more terrifying: standing at the edge of the tallest building or just watching someone do it? I guess the second one is my choice. What really scares me the most is that I will not be able to do and experience new things. I mean, life is for living so make the most out of it.
For those people who are ‘so’ afraid to go out of the norms, you might be safe but if you continue to hide inside your box you will be ignorant of the world. Most people are startled at any moment of And that is the loneliest thing I can ever think of right confrontation. Their instinct is to fight or flight. These now (aside from having 5 for your final grade). people are what I call “bold-spirited” they can react in Go and stand at the edge, but don’t be fool an instant and they can make judgement based on how they feel at the moment sometimes not taking in enough to jump. to consideration what might happen next. Don’t get CLIFF-HANGER me wrong, being able to decide immediately is a gift Yeah, life is full of it. That moments when you say but not foreseeing the future is carelessness. For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction, famous you love him but never did get any answer, you’re words by physicist Isaac Newton. It’s a basic concept watching telenovela and it went immediately to of life and we must always remember that it its ok to be “abangan bukas” or “abangan sa lunes”, hearing a beautiful song on the radio and the DJ never brave as long as we have limitations. mentioned the title, a surprise quiz and its result, logging Jump but remember all consequences. in to my account to check your grades but seeing that it is not uploaded yet: these uncertainties of life that we EDGE always encounter. It is always funny how life throws I am afraid of being in high places, not really great suspense at us. because of the height, but it is the thought of falling Don’t be afraid of uncertainties, it’s life's free from the height. Falling and breaking your bones, thrill! Just cling to edge and feel the awesomeness of destroying your internal organs, smashed out brains and everything, and dying on the spot – ok I have the towering heigt.
JUMP
Krisstal P. Ocampo Editor-in-Chief
When you find yourself left in a state of suspense, say, a cliffhanger from a movie, questions and conspiracies fill your head. A strong influential factor would be your emotions and personal belief, the culture you were exposed to. We find ourselves hooked with the protagonist that everything that person does seem to be always justified. It’s the antagonist we usually blame for the misfortune casted upon the main character. But the truth is, in real life, there are no protagonists or antagonists. In real life, there is no difference between the two roles. Each person is an emergence of both. The dictates of society, religion, and law affect the majority (if not all) in heavy doses. Limitation is the wise man’s enemy. As a free individual residing on the Philippine soil (or in this planet’s soil to state generality to all nationalities), we have a choice to decide on where to plant ourselves in the ground. Some commit themselves to a side that they hardly know, basing on the decisions of the people they interact with, roughly having no personal say in the dilemma. The minority side exists because of the individuals who tested the waters, went beyond the boundaries. They may have discovered a portion of the earth’s unknown. And those who can’t understand are considered unfortunate. Wisdom comes from understanding both perspectives. What may be considered a taboo before is considered a norm now. In fact, Hungarian Physician Ignaz Semmelweis who proposed the idea that doctors in maternity clinics should wash their hands before and after handling patients, was criticized for just saying it. It was the 1840s and the germ theory did not exist yet at that time. The medical society did not take this idea lightly because they cannot seem to grasp the idea that they might be previously killing their own patients and ridiculed that they were carrying diseases around. He was bashed and faced so much harassment from the medical community. After decades of bitterness, he was committed to an asylum, where he eventually died. It was only years after his death that Louis Pasteur confirmed Semmelweis’ findings on his germ theory of diseases. Semmelweis is now remembered as a pioneer in antiseptic procedures. Too bad he wasn’t glorified when he was still breathing.
might be the door to victory. Allan Turing was the war hero, the genius who found flaw in the system and successfully decoded it. Without his contribution, the war might’ve not stopped when it did. But then homosexuality was literally illegal in the United Kingdom at that time. And Turing, being British and openly gay, was condemned to punishments under this law, affecting him psychologically in hefty degrees, causing depression and other negative effects to his health. Society was unkind to Turing. And his heroism was all but forgotten. But that’s all in the past. We live in a time where most of the world’s valor seemed to be already written all in history, making us skeptical if ever there was still left in the world for us to do and for history to recognize. But we forget that history becomes more complicated as time goes by, and our time now would be the history for the future to look back to and admire. Our decisions would shape the uncertain future. What we do now is critical for the formation of tomorrow.
Hindi nagkakamali si Jose Rizal noong sinabi niya na ang “kabataan ang pag-asa ng bayan.” Maraming nagsasabi na mas maayos pa ang sistema ng pamumuhay ‘noong araw’. But the argument is relative. Pero marami ding pagkakamali ang nakaraan na itinama natin ngayon. Liberalism, in a conservative’s eyes, is a bad thing. But I say this; the generation today is more than capable of bringing prosperity, glory, recognition, and victory to the country. We are not the denominator. We have our own merits, our own strength. It all comes down to realization. It’s all a matter of perspective.
There’s a great deal of the unknown that hides behind the depths of the earth, only to be discovered by those who seek enlightenment, those that have the ability and the willingness to open their minds, those willing to learn. The other side, whose exposure is curtained from our eyes, is only within reach. The goal is to expand our knowledge, to open our eyes to the intangible secrets and hidden meaning scattered all around us but left untold. The gain: A wider perspective, a greater understanding of During World War II, the Germans had this code the world we live in, sympathy for both the innocent and system called the Enigma Code. It was branded by the guilty. Germans and the rest of the world as unbreakable. The Germans used this system to transfer classified messages Go ahead, turn the pages and be and intelligence among themselves. But the Allies knew enlightened. that deciphering the Enigma Code would be critical, and
Taryn Antonella D. Gonzaga Literary and Leisure Editor
sa Isang taon na ang nakakalipas mula nang siya ay pumanaw. Isang taon na rin akong sinisisi sa kanyang pagkamatay. Isang taong bangungot sa aking buhay. Minahal ko siya pero nagmahal ako ng iba. Oo, nagkamali ako. Kung mabibigyan lamang ako ng pagkakataong itama ang lahat ng ito, gagawin ko. Kung nabubuhay lang sana siya. “Ikaw! Ikaw ang dahilan kung bakit namatay ang anak namin! Ikaw!” galit na galit na sabi ng ina ni Victor. “Kung hindi ba naman kasi nagpabulag ang aming anak sa’yo, edi sana buhay pa siya ngayon!” Kahit isang taon na ang nakakalipas, sariwa pa rin sa aking alaala ang lahat. Napaupo na lamang ako sa sulok ng aming kwarto, humahagulgol ng iyak. ‘Di ko na alam ang gagawin ko. Ilang beses ko nang tinangkang tapusin ang aking buhay ngunit hindi talaga umaayon ang tadhana. Nawala halos lahat ng kaibigan ko nang malaman ang ginawa ko kay Victor. Lalo ako’ng nawalan ng pag-asang mabuhay. Pero sabi nila habang may buhay, may pag-asa. Nagpakalayo-layo ako. Pumunta ako sa lugar na walang nakakakilala sa’kin, sa lugar na ang tingin sa’kin ay isang normal na tao. Walang manghuhusga. Sinubukan kong mamuhay ng normal kagaya ng dati, buhay kung saan malaya akong gawin ang gustong kong gawin. Isang bagay na lang siguro ang hindi ko na magagawa muli—ang umibig. Nilibot ko ang nayon. Malayong-malayo sa kinagisnan kong Maynila. Pero ayos na rin ito. Alam ko na dito ko matatagpuan ang kalayaang matagal na ipinagkait sa akin. Habang nililibot ko ang nayon, may isang lalaki ang lumapit sa akin. Parang may kamukha siya. Hindi ko lang alam kung sino. Tinanong ako kung bago raw ako sa lugar. Natahimik ng sandali at tumanggo na lang ako sa kanya. Tinanong nya ako kung maaari nya akong ilibot sa nayon dahil maliligaw lamang ako kung ako lang mag-isa. Muli, natahimik ako sandali at tumanggo sa kanya. Kinuwentuhan niya ako ng maraming bagay tungkol
kanilang baryo. Nung una, hindi ko na lamang siya pinapansin pero hindi ko maiwasan na maibaling ang atensyon ko sa kanya. Napapatawa niya ako sa mga simpleng biro niya. Ngayon ko na lang ulit naramdaman ang ganitong kaligayahan matapos ang mahabang panahon. Inihatid niya ako sa bahay matapos iyon. Natawa na lang ako ng malaman na magkapit-bahay pala kami. Halos araw-araw naging ganoon ang sistema ng aking buhay. Ililibot nya ako sa mga lugar na hindi ko pa napupuntahan. Minsan, nagtataka ako dahil parang napakalaki ng nayon. Ganoon pa rin siya sa akin. Nakakapagkwento na ako sa kanya tungkol sa aking buhay. Magaan siyang kausap kagaya ni Victor. Hindi nagtagal, nahuhulog na pala ako sa kanya. Pero alam kong hindi pwede. Sinubukan kong iwasan siya. Tumanggi ako sa mga imbitasyon nya. Hindi ko na siya kinakausap. Para bang nagbago bigla ang lahat. Pero hindi siya sumuko. Isang gabi, habang naglalakad ako pauwi may isang lalaking humarang sa aking daraan. Alam kong siya na naman iyon. Nagulat na lamang ako ng hawakan niya ng mahigpit ang aking braso. Nasasaktan ako. Nang humarap ako sa kanya, isang seryosong mukha ang bumungad sa akin. Hindi ko alam ang iniisip niya. Sinubukan kong magpumiglas sa pagkakahawak nya pero sadyang malakas siya. Biglang tumulo ang luha sa kanyang mga mata. Hindi ko alam kung bakit. Lalo niya akong ginulat sa mga sumunod na nangyari. Niyakap niya ako. Niyakap niya ako ng mahigpit. Hindi ko alam ang aking gagawin. Nagsalita sya. Sinabi nya na nasasaktan sya sa aking ginagawa. Hindi ko maintindihan. Inamin niya na may pagtingin siya sa akin. Nanlaki ang aking mga mata ng marinig ko yon. Bumitaw ako sa pagkakayakap niya at sinabi niya ng harapan sa akin na gusto niya ako. Hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit
biglang tumulo ang aking mga luha. Parang bang tinatraydor ako ng sariling kong katawan. Napaluhod ako at patuloy na umiyak. Naging masaya kami. Sa katunayan, ang nalalapit na ang aming kasal. Akala ko hindi na ako makakahanap ng taong mamahalin ako ng totoo. Pumunta kami sa kanilang probinsya upang ipaalam sa ilan nyang kamag-anak ang nalalapit naming pagiisang dibdib. Sabi niya, ipapakilala nya raw ako sa kanyang kuya. Matagal na raw nya ako gustong makita. Sa isang kubo, ‘di kalayuan sa aming pansamatalang tinitirahan, nakatira ang kanyang kuya. Mag-isa lamang siya roon. Hinawakan niyang mahigpit ang aking kamay at ngumiti sa akin. Kumatok siya sa pinto at laking gulat ko ng pagbuksan kami. Ngumiti sa akin ang lalaki. “VICTOR?!” Bigla akong bumalik sa aking kamalayan. Isang taon na ang nakakalipas mula nang siyang pumanaw. Isang taon na rin akong sinisisi sa kanyang pagkamatay. Isang taong bangungot sa aking buhay. Minahal ko siya pero nagmahal ako ng iba. Oo, nagkamali ako. Kung mabibigyan lamang ako ng pagkakataong itama ang lahat ng ito, gagawin ko. Kung nabubuhay lang sana siya.
I Still Believe Marie Bianca C. De Vera
How many times I’ve got rejected? How many times I’ve got disconnected? How many times I’ve got betrayed? How many times I’ve got hunted?
This world brings me down But no. I won’t get defeated.
No, I’m not a loser. No one could hinder me
For I’m a great conqueror I’ll fight until the end Win or lose, I’ll compete Yes, I still believe
Life Goes On Aura Claire M. Paulino I don’t know what’s down this road Cruising life through an unclear boat All I know is that I’m on my own It can go right or wrong but life will go on
I don’t know what I really want I’m still trying hard to figure it out I must look through every little things ‘Cause you’ll never know what’ll spring I don’t have to escape from it and run I have to face it because life will never be gone
I’m just trying to find my place in this world Before everything crumbles and then fold Every roadblock that I’ll chance upon I’ll have to push it and life will certainly go on
Dear Jay-ar,
Maraming beses kong pinag-isipan kung ano ang gagawin ko kung sakaling dumating ang araw na magkita tayo. The first thing that came up in my mind ay sampalin ka, awayin,at sabihan ng masasakit na salita. Hindi kita titigilan hanggang hindi ka nagmamakaawa at sabihin ang mga salitang matagal ko ng hinihintay. Pero naisip ko kung gagawin ko yun lalo lang bibigat ang ang pakiramdam ko, ‘tsaka hindi bagay sakin ang kontrabida ang peg. Second na naisip ko ay mag-drama. Iiyak ako ng bonggang-bongga. Ipaparamdam ko sa iyo ang kalungkutan na binigay mo sa akin, hanggang maawa ka sakin at mag decide ka na ibalik na lang natin sa dati ang relasyon natin. Pero, again, naisip ko na hindi pwede yun. Past is past hindi na pwedeng balikan, isa pa pangit ako umiyak baka siguro imbes na maawa ka matawa ka lang. Patatlo, at pinaka desperada sa lahat, magmamakaawa ako sayo. Kung kelangan lumuhod gagawin ko! Pero bago pa man mabuo ang plano na yan sa utak ko, I already trashed it. And besides im not that desperate. Marami pa ko naisip, hindi na lang worthy para isulat pa. Pero nung magkita tayo, alam mo, ni isa sa mga inisip ko na scenario hindi ko kinaya gawin. When I stared into your eyes, they are gloomy. Its way beyond sadness, is that guilt? Akala ko ako lang ang nasaktan sa pag-alis mo ng walang paalam nuon. I feel bad for both of us, pareho pa rin tayong haunted dahil sa past natin. And that I want to change. I love you, I always have and I always do. Pero syempre hindi na katulad ng dati, naniniwala kasi ako na ang pag-ibig gaya ng mga tao ay nag-babago, it takes another form. My love for you is different, but It is still love. Patawadin mo ako, pinapatawad na rin kita sa naging choice mo nuon. I want to thank you, dahil kung hindi dahil sa mga nangyari nuon, you and I would not be the person we are right now. Palayain na natin ang isat-isa, sa lungkot, galit at pag-ibig. Alam ko mahirap pero kakayanin natin, tayo pa.
♼ Lots, Tala P.S Let us stop holding on to memories, I guess it would be best that way...
“If you see this, you can’t escape. Because there is no him. Oh no! What kind of friend am I? I haven’t visited my escape. I’ve told you so many times, stay away from him but friend. I have decided to go to him. you didn’t believe me. Now, you’ll regret everything. Stay away I saw Dominic in an all-white hospital dress. Staring at from him before it’s too late!” Gosh! It was an awful nightmare. What was that? No escape? What the heck was he trying to say? He was really out of his mind, literally; that person in my dream—or should I say nightmare, because it’s more like that. So yeah, that person was a friend of mine. His name was Dominic. Two years ago, he was sent to a mental hospital because his parents believed that something was wrong with his behavior. Sad to say, he killed Suzy, a close friend of ours. I didn’t know if that was true because as far as I can remember, we were having a good time at Suzy’s place due to her success in passing the bar examination. So we thought that it was a great time to celebrate. There were six of us, Suzy, Hanna, Dominic, Toby, Bryan, and me. I was drunk that time so I decided to go home. Toby drove me home that’s why I had no idea what really happened.
him made me nervous. What if he attacked me? What am I going to do? No. No. There was no way that Dominic would do that. He’s kind. I knew that though the reports said that he killed Suzy. But, I know for a fact that he didn’t. It’s just that there is no proof.
I closed the door and sat in front of Dominic. He was staring at me. It seemed like he didn’t remember me. Or he didn’t he know me anymore; How would I know? I started to ask him.
“How are you doing Dominic? Do you remember me?”
A smile formed in his pale face.
“Yes. Of course Natalie. I’m good here. Though they want me to take medicines that I don’t deserve. I’m not crazy. They used to tell me that I have to take those pills to make me feel better. But I’m good. I know myself more than anyone The next day, the condominium personnel saw Suzy’s else. You believe me right?”
lifeless body with blood all over her chest. According to reports, Dominic was the last one who went home from Suzy’s place so he was accused of murder. But then the moment that he was about to be imprisoned, his parents told the police officers that Dominic had a psychological disorder. He was then immediately sent to a mental hospital. But until now, I still don’t understand why I keep on having nightmares about him telling me the same line over and over again. Who is that “he” he’s referring to that I need to steer clear from? His lines are haunting me every time I sleep. It’s been two years but I still don’t understand why he is telling me that.
“Uhm. Yeah? Of course.” Uh oh. What should I do? If I didn’t agree with him, he might attack me, but the way he spoke to me, it seemed like normal. By any chance, was he just framed-up? Maybe he wasn’t the one who killed Suzy. But who? Who would do that to her? I didn’t know someone who got mad that much at Suzy to kill her. Suzy is a very nice friend that was why I didn’t know who really killed her. But one thing is for sure, it was not Dominic.
didn’t waste any time and immediately left us, but Toby never left my side. He was always there for me. He was like a best friend to me. He used to pick me up from work and we ate dinner together. We missed the other four. Before, we liked having good times together. We usually stay up late and just enjoying our youth but I just can’t believe that in just two years, everything changed. Suzy died, Dominic got into a ‘mental hospital’, Hanna and Bryan flew to Macau and now it’s just me and Toby.
“Calm down! I believe you. It’s just that, you’re the last one who went home from Suzy’s place. Maybe that is why they…”
“Hey Doms. Do you still remember Suzy?”
“Of course. That night was a nightmare for me. She Then only four of us were left. Everything has changed. was really happy after I left her. I’m clueless about everything That incident changed our relationship with each other except they accused me. I didn’t kill anybody. I didn’t kill Suzy. I Toby. Hanna and Bryan got an opportunity in Macau and they wouldn’t do that to her!”
“Yes I was the last one who went out. But after Toby sent you home, I saw that he returned. I don’t know if he saw me, but when I went out of the elevator, I saw him taking the stairs. I’m not hallucinating that time. He was holding Suzy’s photo but you know he’s a friend. So I thought, he left I didn’t know but after everyone was gone, I suddenly something in Suzy’s place that’s why he went back.”
feel something strange about Toby, he used to have this photo album in his bag. But I haven’t seen it. One time, he dropped it when he was buying our lunch and I saw my picture from the album. So I picked it up and when I was about to open it and return the picture, he screamed at me. I was extremely shocked with what he did. I can’t help but to confront him.
“What’s wrong with you? I just want to have a look then you started to shout at me! Toby, it’s just a photo album!” “I’m sorry. It’s just something important and you don’t have to meddle with this thing.” Something important that I didn’t have to interfere? Who did he think I was; a spy or something? He was totally out of his mind. He’s like Dominic! Oh Dominic. I haven’t visited
Suzy’s photo? Has it something to do with the photo album I wanted to look at? What’s with the album? Oh no. Everything was beginning to be clearer. I think it was Toby. I remember there was a piece of paper in front of the album marked “Targets”. Targets—I thought that those were just his aims in life but maybe those were the people he wanted to get rid of. I remember seeing my picture as part of that album. What if Dominic in my nightmare was right? I needed to stay away from Toby. He was a murderer. He killed Suzy and what if I’ll be the next? I immediately ran from Dominic’s room and when I was about to get my car key, someone grabbed my arm and it was Toby.
“You’ve found out everything huh?”
My life was once a fairytale— filled with love, joy, and happiness. I was once happy. My life was once a dream that I thought will no longer be real. But I was wrong because I met my knight in shining armor that protected me from anything that can harm me. He took care of me. This young and bright man is my refuge and he is my one and only love. My life was once happy. It really was… until the day came that shattered my heart into pieces. *************** Few months before our Christmas vacation in Amsterdam, I often saw him experiencing severe headaches. I always asked him what was wrong, but he usually answered that it was just nothing. Maybe he had some trouble in work, that’s what I thought. I trusted his words so much that I didn’t even bother bringing him in the hospital just to make sure. That was until the day I received a phone call from his executive assistant telling me that Martin collapsed in the middle of their meeting. She told me the address of the hospital and I listed i t on a piece of paper and afterwards hanged up. I don’t know what really happened, but I had a feeling that it had something to do with Martin’s severe headaches. “We run some tests with the patient and we found out that he has a brain tumor. Why you only bring him now? The tumor is spreading and it has grown bigger,” the doctor said. After I heard what the doctor said, I felt so guilty. If only I had encouraged him to go for a check-up, then it wouldn’t be happening right saw him lying on the hospital bed. He was peacefully sleeping. If you’re to stare at him, you won’t even think that he was suffering from a malignant disease. I couldn’t help but burst into tears. What am I going to do now? He is my only source of strength and now he is weak. don’t want to lose him. I love him so much.
now. I going I
We had almost planned everything about our lives. Things when we’re getting married, where we’re going to live, and how kids we would have. We’re almost there. We were supposed to our own family. We were supposed to celebrate Christmas together. We planned everything but we never something like this. not part of our plan. The doctor said his tumor has grown bigger has no cure. If Martin will undergo an operation to remove tumor, there is no assurance that he will wake up. He brain dead. Hearing these words crushed my heart. I We’ve shared our love for three years and I didn’t Though, I don’t want it to end, but I guess end his grief and sorrow. A loud screech from awakened me from deep slumber. When I took a monitor, it turned into a flat line. I don’t want to afford to lose him. Please, help me. Help Martin! immediately and we were forced to vacate the turned into hours. We were all patiently waiting When the doctor opened the door, I suddenly reality. But I guess, I shouldn’t have returned. Maybe better than my reality. “We’ve done our best. We are sorry, but operation. We are really sorry.”
d i d
l i k e many build This is and it t h e might be didn’t want to lose him. want it to end. someone wants to Martin’s room had glance at his lose him. I can’t Doctors arrived room. Minutes outside the room. returned back to my expectation was far
Martin
didn’t
survive
the
*************** December 23. This is the day in which we were supposed to leave for Amsterdam. We were supposed to celebrate Christmas together. But it won’t happen anymore. I hugged myself. He’s gone. Martin was gone. I will never see him again. My life was once a fairytale. It really was. I thought we will live happily ever after. F**k! There’s no such thing as happy ever after ‘cause if there is, what happened to us? Everyone deserves to be
One and the other Taryn Antonella D. Gonzaga The manic depression state in their eyes is concealed. Blue and brown, once full of hope, but the despair never revealed. What makes easier for one makes it more difficult for the other, But nonetheless they claim it better than having one more to bother. It occupies their minds with insatiable greed. It has become from what rooted from grave need. Their hands never touched, but they were desperate to connect. Though his wrists were broken and crooked was her neck. Some say they’re the fallen, some say they’re blessed. Condemned or not, both were plagued with unrest. The masks they wear failed to hide the darkening bruise On their lips were fake smiles, but their words were evident of abuse. One claims to be happy, the other wanted to be. One’s eyes were blinded, the other no longer wants to see. They were a wrecked mess, and none bothered to speak or try. And how could they with the gags covering their lips that lie? One stands before the other, in trial for numerous accounts. They only hear one voice, one that matters, one that resounds. It speaks of beauty, of love, of warmth, of peace. One wanted to believe, the other knew that it wanted to seize. One took the mask off, yet the other’s had remained.
They accused the exposed, and praised the one who refrained. “This is wrong, this is unacceptable, this is a sin.” “Think of God, think of your future, think of your kin.” One spoke with words in accord to what it had perceived. Despite reason, despite logic, only oppression had it received. And yet the other remained in captivity, within its own shadow of gray. And the manic depression state had rotten and festered in wildfire fray.
S
nap. The shutters closed to capture the moment which he deemed as perfect. Lilac eyes looked almost transparent as she stared blank-faced at the lens of his camera. It was a stunning picture; she was flawless in every way. When he lowered it to elbow level and risked another glance at her, he realized that she wasn't trying to look at his camera or pose for the perfect picture. She was staring at him, eyes intently fixed on his gaze that she hardly even blinked. She knew... She knew that he knew her little secret. And she wasn't very happy about that. She was far, too far for her to reach him, but not far enough to see what he wanted to show her. He fished out a photograph from his coat pocket and held it to the air, facing her direction. Her stoic facade morphed into something... different: A look on her pretty Slavic features that he had never seen before, despite all the documentaries and photographs of her face in his room. Fear became evident on her porcelain skin. He waved the photo for two seconds before slipping it back in his pocket again. The police were investigating the scene a few meters away and a large crowd gathered around with spectators and the media. There was not a way she could silence him and get away with it under the presence of all these witnesses. Not so very distant--in fact, he was close enough to find the noises unbearable--had he heard Arthur's screams and miserable wailing. All sense of professionalism from the detective was drained to the last drop, as beyond many people's shoulders, he saw Arthur drop on his knees on the cold pavement, pulling at his hair as he stared at the victim's corpse bathing in its own pool of blood. It was Arthur's job to crack this case, arrest this assassin the whole of London knew by a media-given name. He could tell that his determination level increased drastically to the extent that he would resort to extreme measures just to get his hands on the killer, even if it meant violating his code of ethics.
wouldn't Arthur's him, in had no a s every had been frivolo us v e r y friendship guilt as his l i p s with the another evidence admire. s a w a n d consecutive her... work. the last. saw a look
And it was her doing. She killed Arthur's lover. It take her too long to kill adopted brother too, which was this version of the story. But he plans except to lurk in the shadows, subtle as he could be, following her move. Arthur's lover, her most recent victim, a good friend to him. The lover was in nature, but he found its company entertaining while it lasted. Even if the was very valuable, he almost felt no deranged blue eyes only watched, his pressed shut as his hands struggled buttons of the camera, capturing golden moment, to be used either as or as things he could look at and The spectacle was horrifying, but he things far worse. He stalked a criminal outsmarted her. He was there a few days ago to witness a few accounts of That day wasn't very different from Only this time, he knew the victim. He of shock and betrayal as he
connected eyes with the dying person, who can no longer speak as her knife impaled its throat. He evacuated the place immediately as he sensed that she was beginning to take note of his presence. The street was dark, and shadows were taken advantage of. But come morning, reports were sent. A crowd gathered, she was there again. It was the day to finally set her mind at ease, to give confirmation to every little assumption she had in mind. As they were too busy about the corpse, he flashed her the photographs. Her pale face was covered in blood on the paper, almost unrecognizable looking at her now. And it was enough to get her to bite. He had no plans after that. He was caught unknowing of what to do as one night he found himself at gunpoint, his life being threatened by the fugitive who had blood of other men on her hands. He had nothing to do with her. Her business was hers and now that he intervened, he became an unofficial target. Maybe the murder of his good friend would be enough reason of an excuse to get himself hunting her. And this was exactly what he wanted--except of course, the possibility of dying part. But if only had he done his job and exposed her, his life and freedom wouldn't be threatened like this. See, he was a journalist. He had been reporting about this case since the first spark of the prospect of fire. But he was too distracted admiring a pale-faced beauty standing amongst the crowd. And every day, every murder, he saw her. Staring, standing still as a statue, as if she had known who the next to die was, and when and where it would take place. He grew suspicious. And eventually, suspicion motivated and strongly urged him to take action. He followed her, knew her name, found out about her schedule. How he managed to achieve such a thing was not important enough to be mentioned. But none of these discoveries were reported to the police or have been exposed to the media. "You speak highly of me," she said, taking out newspaper clippings out of a brown folder and scattering them across the table between them. "I appreciate your admiration... Even if... it's creepy." She pointed her gun momentarily on the printed photographs pinned on his wall before pointing it back to him again. "What do you want from me?" "Everything," he replied. It was true. When he had written about this case, he was often questioned why the tone of his voice on the words seemed more impressed rather than horrified. It seemed to them that he favored her side than those of her victims'. Maybe he did. Maybe the idea of this woman intrigued him to the point of obsession. As he said on his opinion about the matter, she was "the mystery that haunts the hearts of many, spreading fear. But her vices radiate a kind of amplified intensity that reveals human nature for what it is. It is my virtue to admire the naked truth, no matter how deceived we are of the moral standards people before us had set." His eyes were shrouded by her beauty and malign grace. "I can't let you be a mystery to me forever." She looked at him with curious eyes, weighing her options until finally ending with a decision to spare his life. She lowered the gun. "Why not turn me in?" "Because that's no fun," he replied with certainty in his voice. Once he took an interest upon something, all else mean nothing to him. "I want you for myself... It's not a question of why. I just do." And what did he want to do with her exactly? He didn't know. All he knew was that he had to have her... Her stilettos tapped noisily on his tiled floor as she headed for his direction, getting closer and closer. "I don't have to kill you," she muttered, batting her eyelashes. When she was close enough, her icy lilac eyes stared into him unwaveringly as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders. "But you must cooperate with me. Can you do that?" "Yes." Anything.
B
questionable for an ordinary fellow, was exactly the kind of ingredient he needed to revive him. And even such vicious creatures as them were capable of love. Negativity was compatible. It's ironic to think that he ventured so far from his childish dreams, and that was to become a hero that promotes peace to the society. Maybe he wasn't meant to be the hero. He couldn't stop her, he didn't even try to lift a finger to save her victims from dying. Maybe, out of selfishness, he could be her hero. She was just as wicked, just as wretched, just as corrupted. Even the most evil of humans deserved love because it was love that was stolen from them in the first place. He only intended to give it to her and acquire it back from her. He received the feeling of happiness, the comfort of her warmth, the sweetness of her love, and in exchange, coldness of conscience. And the little he had left was being challenged. "Please," she whispered. "I need to die." And then she whispered his name, soft and pleading. "What difference will it make? Pull the trigger." He'd kill for her smiles. He loved the way her eyes twinkle when she laughed, the way her cheeks would puff red. The scent of her perfume was addicting. There was nothing more soothing than feeling the rhythm of her heartbeat. Her words, although sometimes harsh, had always relieved him from uncertainty. There was no way he could lose her and still live. The both of them were merged whole. He wanted her by his side forever. With this in mind, he had come up with a decision. Swallowing a lump in his throat, he closed his eyes shut and pointed the gun blindly in front of him. "Because I love you," he muttered. "For our forever." He mustered the courage to look at the girl in the eye for the last time. She would panic, if she wasn't too weak to move. "I'm sorry." Then he pulled the trigger‌ and she applauded him for it.
ut this "yes" was merely but a word that was meant to settle an agreement, not knowing that such a thing could lead him to the darkest places, breeding the shadiest of things. His name, just as hers, was left unknown to the public. That may or may not be strictly the truth, since his name appeared almost every day on the morning papers. Eventually anything spotless exposed to an unhealthy environment would adapt for the sake of survival. Which was exactly the case right then. For survival. What happened to you? Aren't you supposed to be the hero? What are you doing? These were the things he often asked himself every time his hand would touch the metal of his handgun. She was the one who gave it to him. Her words were "whatever you do with it is up to you." Liar. She was demanding him to pull the trigger. But now he questioned himself again. The gun was locked and loaded, pointing to a girl with platinum blond hair and lilac eyes. His blue ones could hardly even look at them without tearing up. She was beautiful, and beneath the layers of skin and clothes, he knew she was scared at the same time. She was healthy with life, but her life was his to take. "Is there no other way to do this...?" He asked, his hands trembling worse and worse the longer he hesitated to kill her. "You know I'd rather be dead than arrested," she reasoned, straightening her platinum locks as if that detail mattered right then. "Do it," she urged, her lilacs staring daggers at him. Despite his recent actions, such a thing as this was impossible to ask of him. "No," he refused, lowering the gun. "I can't." "But you love me," she whispered, stepping closer to where he was. "If you love me you'd do this for me." And there she was again, trying to convince her with her sweet words and even sweeter touches. Her He smiled, weakly, but he arms wrapped around him affectionately, pulling him to a kiss. And like a maybe the most heart-warming of all, foolish man, he gave in, hugging her tighter. too. She felt human to him. Despite the talks going around about the demoness that promoted death in London city, to him, she was an angel “A job well done,� she said. sent from heaven that shall satisfy his every human need, every little desire that rooted from years of deprivation and loneliness. When he touched her skin, he felt warmth. He felt every pulse, every immediate reaction to stimuli. It was a reminder that even someone like her was just as fragile as those of the people she killed. It only takes atrocity to make one so inhuman to actually feel alive. And life was worth so much more than the hollow darkness of being an empty vassal, even if humanity was on the line. At least, that was what he believed in. The dullness of his life had lead him to yearn for spice and excitement, bored of the ordinary. Even her beauty was nonpareil. And her actions and introduction to his world was a clashing wave of robust, yet dark, allure; her distinctiveness, even though infamous and
smiled. she
And did
The icy cold water feels like a samurai sword, “Is… is… he ok?” every tiny blade cuts through my flesh, my veins and my soul. I can feel the pressure rising to my head, if I can “I am sorry to say ma’am, but he is dead upon never have you back in my life, I would rather be dead. arrival at the hospital” I dropped my cellphone. My Please go back, please help me, save me. knees are like jelly, I cannot seem to feel anything. I “Hey, when are you two getting married?” my ever blabber-mouth best friend (Patricia) posted the most annoying question of the day. I darted my deadly vicious look at her. She just shrugged her shoulder and smiled at me. “Actually, that was a good question Patricia,” he smiled at Pat. “I’ve been thinking about this lately and I can’t seem to find the best timing, I guess it’s now” he stood up then knelt down in front of me. In front of my friends, and every stranger in this restaurant. He opened a velvet tiffany box, I gasped, is this even real?
went numb. Every sound is so distant. Have I just lost the love of my life? My life? This must be a mistake, this cannot be true. We are just preparing for our wedding. Life is so unfair. Why Jake? Why the hell did You get Jake from me? Why? Four weeks, two days, sixteen hours. Long, slow, painful time frame. I wake up, I cry, I drink, I grieve, I sleep, I have nightmares. And the cycle goes on and on. My soul is tired. I want Jake back, alive and well. I love him so much I cannot live another day without him. God, how I missed him. I must make my move or I will be alone forever. I stood up, grabbed my Jack Daniels and went to the top floor swimming pool of my condo. This is where we used to swim and have fun, and this will be my tool to be with him. I took the longest swig and finished my liquor. Perfect timing, no other person is around, not even the life guard.
“Maggie, will you spend your forever with me? Marry me please.” For the first time in ages, I was out of words. My vision blurred out, am I crying? Maybe. All I can remember is that I said yes and before I knew it the crowd is cheering and my friends are taking photos and videos on their phone. He stood up and helped me up I stood at the edge of the pool with my back on as well. He kissed me, let me tell you, it is the sweetest the water. “Wait for me Jake, will you?” I whispered and kiss ever. It is like a dream come true. That is when it all took a plunge. sink-in. I jumped up and down. The icy cold water feels like a samurai sword, “Guys! We’re getting married!” every tiny blade cuts through my flesh, my veins and my soul. I can feel the pressure rising to my head, if I can Krrrng…krrrng… krrrng… never have you back in my life, I would rather be dead. Please come back, please help me, save me. I am almost I stared at my cellphone, it is four in the morning out of breathe, when a hand pulled me to the surface, I for Pete’s sake. Who the hell could be ringing me at this struggled at first but then I let myself be dragged. I hour? It’s an unknown number, great. coughed heavily and gasped for air. “Hello?” “Hi good morning, is this Mrs. Rivera?” it is strange but I love how that sounded.
“Jesus, are you trying to kill yourself?” the man shouted. I just nodded. “Your too young to die” he stared at my eyes.
“Yes, soon to be Mrs. Rivera, may I know who is “Well, I guess its not yet my time” I looked away calling?” and tears flow on my cheeks, I just stared at the water. He grabbed a towel nearby and wiped my tears and “This is Police Inspector Arnel De Guzman, we wrapped it around me. Then I felt the man lifting me up. found Mr. Jake Rivera along Alabang Zapote Road, he I surrendered and hold onto him. got involved in car accident” panic stricken me. Whoever he is.
Nag-aaral ako sa St. Therese University sa kursong Nursing. Ika-apat na taon ko na at kaunti nalang gagraduate na rin ako. Panibagong semester, panibagong professors at panibagong mga kablockmates. Akala ko itong huling taon ko ay katulad lang ng mga naunang tatlong taon ko sa pag-aaral. Mas may pressure nga lang kasi after this year, magtetake na ako ng licensure examination para maging isang registered nurse. Oo nga pala, nakalimutan kong magpakilala. Ako nga pala si Francine Mendoza. Kasalukuyan akong nasa library para gawin ang thesis namin. Kailangan ko itong magawa dahil ito ay isa sa mga pre-requisite ng university. Kung hindi ka makakapasa dito, hindi ka rin makakagraduate. Kaya kailangan ko munang pagtuunan ng pansin ito. Dito sa university namin, kailangan masipag ka lalo na sa paggawa ng thesis dahil hindi by group o by pair ang paggawa, kundi individual. Kaya kung hindi mo pagsisikapan, wala ka talagang matatapos.
After months of doing my thesis, I already finished it (Yes. O diba? Kung maka-english ako wagas. Kelangan eh. English only lang daw pagdating ng defense sa harap ng panel)! On the way na ako papuntang school at super ready na ako para sa defense mamaya. Teka nga at ialalabas ko ang checklist ko. Hard copy ng Thesis Document Soft copy (Flash Drive) Extra corporate attire Isang tabong English Ayan ready na talaga ako. Kakasya na siguro ang isang tabong English na baon ko mamaya. Hahahaha! Biro lang, mukhang ang kailangan ko kasi ay isang baldeng English. Oh sige na, papasok na ako. At kung minamalas ka nga naman, ang bagal ng jeep na sinasakyan ko. Maaga pa naman ako umalis sa bahay para makapag-rehearse ako sa harap ng mga kablockamtes ko kung tama ba yung mga sasabihin ko sa harap ng panel. Eh kaso mukang di na ata mangyayari yun dahil sa sobrang bagal ng jeep. Eh mas mabilis pa ata kung tumakbo na lang ako kaso, mahahaggardo verzosa naman ako. Ayaw ko namang humarap sa panel na lapot na lapot yung makeup ko at sabog-sabog yung buhok. Baka mapagkamalan pa akong naka-drugs kung nagkataon. At dahil diyan, naalala ko na may isang sakayan ng mabibilis na jeep dito kaya napagisip-isip ko na bumaba nalang at sumakay sa panibagong jeep para makaabot ako sa defense namin. “Oh yung mga St. Therese University! Aalis na aalis na!” Sigaw ng barker ng jeep. Agad naman akong sumakay at di ko na inalintala kung ano ang mangyayari basta ang importante ay hindi ako ma-late sa defense namin. Grabe, sobrang bilis ng jeep na’to. Mukang aabot ako sa defense namin. Kaso parang biyaheng langit itong sinasakyan ko. Maingat kong hinawakan ang dala kong case na naglalaman ng thesis documents ko nang biglang makarinig ako ng isang malakas na busina...Parang umiikot ang paningin ko, nakita ko ang ibang pasahero na duguan ang mukha at katawan. Ano bang nangyayari? Bigla kong naalala ang thesis ko. Agad ko itong hinanap ngunit parang naparalisa ang buong katawan ko at hindi ako makagalaw. Sa puntong ito, nawalan na ako ng malay. ************************************************************************************ Maliwanag na ilaw ang tila nagpagising sa akin. Tumingin ako sa paligid. Halos nakaputi ang lahat ng mga taong nakakasalubong ko. May mga ilang taong nadadaanan akong umiiyak, yung iba naman balisa. Meron din namang nakatulala na tila may malalim na iniisip. Pati tuloy ako napaisip kung nasan ako, hanggang sa nakita ko sa information center ang mga salitang “St. Luke’s Medical Hospital.” Ha? Nasa isang ospital ako pero bakit? “Oy Francine! Congrats satin! Sa wakas nakamit na natin ang tagumpay!” sigaw ng isang pamilyar na babae na nasa Information Center. Tagumpay? Anong tagumpay? Naaalala ko na bigla yung babae! Siya si Yanna, kablockmate ko dati. Wow, nakaputing damit siya as in all white. Sobrang white na blouse and pencil skirt with matching white stockings at white shoes. Meron din siyang white na cap. Ah oo! Nasa ospital ako, agad akong napatingin sa suot ko, pareho kami ng damit ni Yanna at dahil doon, isang matamis na ngiti ang gumuhit sa aking mukha.
Awesome sceneries. Beautiful smiles. Incredible stories. These are the moments I always witness. I enjoy my job. No, it’s not a job. It’s my hobby. I’m always with him. We capture different moments of a person’s life. It was a beautiful Saturday morning. Here we are again. We’re hired to cover a wedding. Not just an ordinary wedding. It’s the much-awaited wedding of my brother and soon-to-be sister-in-law. Since that’s my brother, it’s pro bono. I went upstairs and wake him up. As we go to the venue, both of us kept silent. No one wants to start the conversation. I’m used to it. I’ve never heard him talk but his presence makes me happy. When we arrived, the view stunned me. I never thought my brother could give his bride that kind of wedding. Just to clarify, I don’t underestimate his capability. This is just all out of my expectation. I regret giving my brother this pro bono coverage. The soft salty scent from the ocean filled the air. Everyone stared at the bride as she walks down the aisle with a glamorous white gown designed by a well-known designer. As the bride draws near, the groom started to cry. Uncontainable joy, speechless faces were captured. We did our 101% best to give the couple the best gift ever we could give them. How I wish to have that kind of wedding with a perfect man. After that memorable wedding, everyone congratulated the newlyweds. They approached me and thanked me for the coverage. I smirked at my brother and told him that I shouldn’t give it pro bono because I know that he can afford it. He tapped me and said, “Thank you. Don’t worry. I’ll be the one who’ll hire a professional photographer for your wedding. Anyway, have you met the man of your dreams?” “I still don’t have any plans for that matter.” I bitterly said “You should. Time passes by so fast that you could not feel it. Don’t get left behind.” I left them and went to the balcony thinking about what my brother said. Silence ruled my night. Suddenly, a tall guy with spiky black hair and dark blue eyes wearing a formal suit approached me. “Hey. Is it okay for you if I stay here?” “Oh, sure. It’s not my place anyway.” “Thanks.” He broke the silence. He’s too loud for man but I enjoyed his company. We talked about different things. We shared different experiences. I’ve never been this happy. His smiles used to be my smile. I feel like I’m in the different side of the world with him. Time passes by and we didn’t even notice it. “Thanks for that wonderful night just talking with you.” He then smiled. “I enjoy spending this night with you anyway. Thanks.” “If you don’t mind, I’ll escort you to your room.” “No. It’s okay. I can go there by myself.” “I insist.” And he grabs my hand. My heart beats so fast that I can’t stop it. I don’t know why. Am I falling in love? It’s very impossible. I just met him. When we get into my room, I thanked him. I open my door and as I go inside, he suddenly pulled me and kissed me. I was shocked and he smiled at me, again. “Good night.” Then he left. I went inside feeling the butterflies in my stomach. I can’t explain what I feel right now. All of a sudden, I saw him. He’s staring at me with a blank face. But then again, he never talked. We are sharing the same bed. It’s too awkward for me. He used to be my reason why I can’t settle down but now I think it’s time for me to let him go. Tomorrow, I’m going to tell him. The next morning, I look at the other side of my bed. He’s not around. I wake up and ask the personnel if they saw him. My tears suddenly fell down. No. Not this fast. Give me some time to tell you how much you mean to me. How much I love you. I can’t still live without you. A guy suddenly opens his arms to comfort me. I can’t see him clearly but I know this man. Yes, I know him.
Kamote Boy Chronicles Krisstal P. Ocampo Isa… dalawa… tatlo… apat… lima… limang taon na… Kada taon ibat-ibang mukha ang kanyang nakikita, ibat-ibang klase ng ugali ang kanyang pinakisamahan, ibat-ibang edad… Bukod siyang naiiba, para sa kanya, pare-parehong subjects, pare-parehong professor, pare -pareho ang pinag-aaralan – ngunit hindi niya ito maintindihan. Hanggang sa isang araw, habang naglalakad siya pauwi ng bahay, nadapa siya face down sa harapan ng talipapa sa may landayan. Pagbangon niya, duon niya nakita ang isang tumpok ng kamote, at duon niya din na realize: “shit!! tila ako’y nangangamote…”
Scene 2: Peer pressure (kaibigan yan mahirap tanggihan) “Tol, may bagong bukas na comp-shop sa may gilid forty pesos lang 3 hours, tara laro tayo!” pang-aaya ng ‘kaibigan’ ni Richard. “Tol, may klase ako sa stat, mapapagalitan na ako ni mam kapag umabsent ulit ako” tugon niya sa kanyang ‘kaibigan’.
“Ang hina mo naman pre, minsan ka lang naming ayain tatanggihan mo pa kami, tsaka minsan lang naman tayo mag laro (minsan: definition- mga 2 or 3 times a week, minimum of 2 hours). Scene 1: Pahirapang gumising (alas siete kasi ang klase, oh yeah Ipagpapalit mo ang tropa sa stat? Grabe ka tol!” beybe…) “Sige na nga!” at lumabas na sila ng campus (mas matimbang “Anak ng… Richard!!! Richard!!! Richard!!! Ala sais na ang DOtA kaysa sa math, anu nga ba naman matututunan mo sa stat? Variance, mean, median at mode? Panis yan sa computer games; nakahilata ka pa dyan?” sigaw ng nanay niya. violence, theft, puyat at bad habit, others: please specify _____) Mahimbing pa ring natutulog si Richard… walang talab ang nanay-alarm-clock niya. Makalipas ang trenta minutos umakyat na ang ++++Ang hindi niya alam, nag check ng attendance ang prof niya, turned out lampas sampu na absences niya, yes, you guessed it right nanay niya sa kanyang kwarto at hinampas siya ng hanger. – dropped na siya. 3 units times 320pesos na naman ang “Hoy Richard!!! Bumagon ka na… wag mong sabihin na nasayang kay nanay at tatay++++ hindi ka na naman papasok!!! Aba sayang lang yang pinang tuScene 3: Masarap matulog sa classroom (bakit ganoon?) tuition namin ng tatay mo kung ganoon!” napakamot na lang siya sa kanyang hita (kung saan nag Prof: Class write this down and memorize it, next meeting landing ang weapon ni recitation tayo. We the sovereign Filipino imploring the aid of Al…. nanay). ++++Hindi man lang niya natapos isulat ang nag-iisang paragraph ng “Nay, nag-text sakin si Alex, preamble, alam niyo na siguro ang future niya sa subject na wala daw si sir hindi na naman daw PhilGov++++ papasok diba sinabi ko sa inyo Scene 4: Pag-pasa ng requirements (super burden) kagabi?” napailing na lang ang kanyang nanay. “Hoy Richard, nakapag-pasa ka na ba ng business plan mo kay Richard ha! Wag istorya dyan”, nanay
++++At hindi alam (so
“Siguraduhin mo yan kang gagawa ng mga tumingin siya sa kanyang sabay irap at talukbong.
Sir?” tanong ni Alex sa kaibigan. “Kailangan ba talaga yun?” tanung niya sa kaibigan.
“Malamang requirement nga diba!” sarcastic na sagot ni Alex. “Copy ka na lang kasi sa net, ganun lang din naman ginawa ng “Kung ayaw niyo karamihan eh” at tumango lang si Richard, tumingala sa langit at maniwala, wag…” umub-ob sa desk. mangiyak-ngiyak niiyang ++++Ang ending hindi siya nagpasa, hindi nga siya gumawa in the sinabi (pero sa totoo lang, first place. Eh finals pa man din nila yun. Uulitin na naman niya ang yun ang huli niyang bala kay Marketing sa ika-apat na pagkakataon++++ nanay, reverse galit epek, nga Isa na namang edisyon ng Boy Kamote Chronicles ang naman, end of discussion nagdaan at hindi pa rin natin masasagot ang katanungan kung kalian agad). siya makaka-graduate (malamang hindi pa muna). isang subject na naman ang Isang paalala mula sa manunulat: Bagamat fiction lang si Boy niya naatendan, ang hindi niya may quiz sila ng araw na iyon, Kamote, siya ay projection ng kahit sinong estudyante. Maari siyang alam niyo na) bagsak na naman maging babae o lalake, kahit anong edad, at kahit anong course, kaya’t mag-ingat at huwag siyang tularan (sigeka, ikaw rin!). ang lolo mo+++
Aura Claire M. Paulino
MONSTER Aura Claire M. Paulino Have they caught up to you, the monsters in my closet? Have they scared you with a ‘boo’, the shadows that trapped you like a corset? Have they ever pounced on you, the monsters under the bed? Have they scratched and snatched you, the nasty ghouls in your head?
They won’t let you sleep, growling clearly beside your head Wanting something from you to keep, a black body and eyes of red They won’t leave you in peace, trying to suffocate you until you drown Slowly cutting you piece by piece, but it’s not enough ‘til they bury you under the ground
You awoke with a thunder-like beat, beads of sweat and you catch your breath You looked under the bed and inside the closet, you laughed because it was all inside your head.
Para sa’yo, ano ang cliffhanger? Karaniwan na sa mga pelikula at telenovela ang salitang ito. Ito ay yung mga nakakabitin moments. Pero isa itong istratehiya kung saan tunay mong aabangan ang ikalawang yugto. Pero hindi ba natin napapansin na ang cliffhanger na ito ay makikita rin sa lipunang ating ginagalawan? Pangako dito. Pangako doon. Maayos na kalsada, bagong pampublikong paaralan, libreng scholarship, madaming oportunidad na trabaho sa mga mamamayan. Ilan lamang ito sa mga platapormang inihahain nila. Magandang kinabukasan ang matatamo ng mga mamamayan kung sila’y bibigyan ng pagkakataon. Todo kampanya lalo na sa mahihirap. Nagbabalatkayo sa pamamagitan ng paggawa ng mga gawaing mahihirap lamang ang gumagawa. Umaasang makukuha ang tiwalang kanilang inaasam. Ang ilan nama’y gumagawa ng mga proyekto kung saan nalalapit na ang susunod na halalan. Ilang buwan matapos ang pagpapasikat, eleksyon na. Binabalikan ang mga taong nagkasaksi daw ng kanilang mga nagawa. Matapos ang matagumpay na pagkapanalo, ilan lamang sa mga plataporma ang kanilang isinakatuparan. Ang ilan, parang nauntog sa isang malaking bato at nakalimutan na ang kanilang mga ipinangako. Kinalimutan na ang mga taong nasa likod ng kanilang pagkapanalo. Ganito ang lipunang ating ginagalawan. May mga reklamo tayo laban sa kanila. Pero hindi ba natin naiisip na tayo ang dahilan kung bakit sila nandyan? Tayo ang pumili sa kanila upang tayo’y pagsilbihan. Nabulag tayo sa mga pangakong kanilang binitawan. Umasa tayo na mababago ang sistema kung sila’y ating bibigyan ng pagkakataon. Maganda man ang kanilang pamamalakad o taliwas sa ating kagustuhan, nararapat pa’rin natin silang sundin at bigyan ng respeto. Magpasakop sa kanilang pamamahala. Sa susunod na eleksyon, maging matalino sa pagboto ng mga lider na magsisilbi sa bayan dahil kung hindi, pauli-ulit lang ang mangyayari. Patuloy pa rin tayong mabibitin. Nanaisin ba natin na ang kalalakihang lipunan ng ating mga magiging anak ay ganito? Ang sinumang gustong manguna ay marapat munang maglingkod.
Bianca Marie V. Baylon
’
STAKES AND DIFFERENCES Taryn Antonella D. Gonzaga
Genuine eyes, they arouse, False promises, forgotten vows. Poisoned words, persuasive mouth. Establishing trust only few would doubt. Cowardice, it envelops them. Pluck the weed, uproot the stem. Shackled and bound, hands to feet. Yet it still manifests ill-fated deceit. Theories, reasonable solution, Unrecorded, power’s stagnant dilution. Change, change, they revolted. Yet offended of the change they called insulted. Blame the seat, blame the power, Yet as vindicated as the people that cower. Accusations, denials, never so meek. Yet the true fugitive is in the whole that the whole seek.
“Isang lalaki ang natagpuang patay sa talahiban ng isang bakanteng lote. Hinala ng mga pulisya ay ninakawan ito ng hindi pa nakikilalang suspek bago ito hinampas ng napakalakas dahil basag ang bahaging blah blah blah…” Pinatay ko na ang TV. Ayoko nang makinig pa ng balita. Ayokong paniwalaan na wala na si Anthony, ang aking matalik na kaibigan. Gusto kong umiyak, sumigaw, at tumawa. Iyakan ang pagkawala ng aking kaibigan. Sigawan ang taong gumawa nito sa kanya. Tumawa dahil gusto kong paniwalaan na isang biro lang ang nangyayaring bangungot. Nag-iiyakan silang lahat sa burol ni Anthony. Ang mama ni Anthony, ang ate niya, mga kamag-anak, mga kaklase, mga guro, at mga kaibigan. Ang daming nagmamahal sa kanya, pero may kulang. Wala ang papa niya. Hindi makauwi dito dahil TNT lamang siya sa Japan. Nakakalungkot. Nakaupo lang ako sa sulok hawak-hawak ang kape at biskwit na hindi ko pa sinisimulang kainin. Tulala. Yun lang ang aking ginawa. Biglang may tumawag ng pangalan ko. Si Jodi. Lumapit siya sakin na lumuluha. Nilapag ko ang aking hawak na pagkain sa lamesa at niyakap siya. Hikbi siya ng hikbi. Nagsasalita siya pero hindi ko maintindihan ang sinasabi niya. Hinimas-himas ko ang kanyang likod at pinaupo siya sa aking katabing upuan. Hinayaan ko lang siyang umiyak. Nasa elementary pa lang ay magkakaibigan na kami. Malimit kaming magkasama kasi kami lagi ang Top 3 sa klase noon at hanggang ngayon. Sayang nga at hindi na umabot si Anthony sa high school graduation namin sa isang linggo. Napabuntong-hininga ako. Bakit kasi nangyari pa ‘to sa kanya? Araw ng graduation… namin.
Katabi ko si Jodi sa seating arrangement. Third honor kasi siya at ako naman ang salutatorian ng batch
“Marco, narinig kong nag-uusap sila Principal Pulco at Sir Abba nung isang araw na ikaw na lang daw ang gagawing Valedictorian kasi wala na nga daw si... si Anthony,” sabi ni Jodi, namamaga pa ang mga mata. “Pero mas mataas ang grade niya kumpara sakin.” “I don’t know. I’m not sure, pero kung nasaan man si Anthony ngayon sigurado akong matutuwa siya kapag napunta sayo ang award na dapat ay sa kanya.” Nginitian ko lamang siya. Ngumiti din siya at hinawakan ang kamay ko. Napansin niya ang wrist watch na suot ko. Nagtaka siya. “Binigay na sakin yan ni Anthony bilang graduation gift.” “Talaga? Pero parang nung last time ko siyang nakita parang suot pa niya yan, at sabi rin niya sakin padala raw yan ni Tito para sa kanya kaya bakit…?” “Ako lang daw kasi ang hihiwalay sating tatlo. Nakwento niya kasi sakin na parehas daw kayo ng college university na papasukan, pero ang hindi niya alam pumayag na rin sila mama at papa na makasama ko kayo. Ibabalik ko nga sana ito sa kanya pero parang wala nang saysay kung gagawin ko pa.” “Ganun ba? Siguro nga, it’s for the best. Atlis hindi ‘yan nakuha ng magnanakaw nung araw na yun.” “Yeah, buti nga.” Nginitian ko ulit siya at humarap na sa stage. Hindi nagkamali si Jodi. Ako nga ang hinirang na Valedictorian. Nang nasa bahay na kami ng mga magulang ko ay bigla akong iniharap ni papa sa kanya at sinuntok. Wala raw akong pakinabang. Kung hindi pa raw namatay si Anthony, hindi raw ako ang magiging Valedictorian. Gugulin ko raw ang sarili ko sa pag-aaral ngayong bakasyon. Pumasok ako sa kwarto at ni-lock ang pintuan. Sunud-sunod na bumabagsak ang mga luha ko. Hindi na sila nakuntento. Tinanggal ko ang mga nakasabit na medalya sakin, binuksan ang cabinet ko, at inihagis sa isang sulok ang mga ‘to. Bago ko isara yung aparador, tinignan ko ang bag ni Anthony na matagal nang nakatago sa loob. Sabi nga niya sakin noon, makakamit ko raw ang lahat ng gusto ko kung magpapakalakas lang ako ng loob at wag raw akong maging duwag. Tapos, tumawa siya. Tama nga siya. Lakas lang ng loob ang kailangan at untiunti mong makakamit ang lahat ng gugustuhin mo.
Life is full of surprises. You never know where and when, but truly there are endless surprises anywhere and everywhere. We don’t know what would happen next. I myself do love surprises. The feelings of gladness, astonishment, anxiety, pleasure, and a lot more leave everyone in awe. But sometimes surprises are not that good as we thought they are. Surprises can sometimes lead to disappointment because our own expectations that are intended for someone or something else came like a bombshell, leading to any such negative reactions. To cut it short, it turned out the other way around. Worst feeling ever? Instead of surprising someone, you got surprised instead.
of every story. If we encounter some problems, sooner or later it will pass. Just ask yourself this question: Is living a problem-free life called living? As every Filipino used to say, “Ang problema daanan mo lang at huwag mong tatambayan.” Vey hilarious yet really uplifting in so many ways.
Our life is such a big story book. Filled with different emotions in every page. Sounds cliché, but it’s true. We are everything in our story of our lives. If we are going to turn our life into movies, we are the main characters and also the writers of our stories. We would be the one to decide if we are going to do this or that. The succeeding chapters of our life will depend on But instead of nagging about our us. difficulties, why don’t we take a closer look in Life is like a roller coaster. It has its every situation of our life? Isn’t it amazing that ups, downs, twists, and turns. Honestly for once in our life we got surprised? Most of the speaking, it makes my head spin. The truth of time, these glitches drift us away to the the matter is life is very unpredictable. No one surprises of life. We wake up each day with our knows what would happen next. It is just a head down as we follow our tiring routine matter of believing. Believe that there are instead of waking up excited believing that each surprises that you will eventually discover. Each surprise you’ll discover will strengthen your day was full of surprises waiting for us to spirit and each surprise will make it easier for discover. Whether in a good way or not, we you to find the next one. should learn to always look on the brighter side
Bianca Marie B. Baylon Managing Editor