BETHENNY UNFILTERED

Bethenny U N F I L T E R E D

IN A WORLD WHERE SO MUCH OF WHAT WE SEE ON SOCIAL MEDIA IS CURATED, YOU CAN ALWAYS COUNT ON BETHENNY FRANKEL TO BE THE REAL DEAL AND TELL IT LIKE IT IS. HERE’S HOW SHE’S LIGHTING THINGS UP THIS SUMMER—AND BEYOND!

BY SYDNEY SADICK

PHOTOGRAPHY BY HANNAH TURNER-HARTS

Photography Assistant: Mark Grochowski

Bethenny’s Fashion: Domenica Embellished Ball Gown Dress, Alice + Olivia Jewelry, her own

People often say that one can’t have it all, but it seems like you’ve achieved that throughout your career. Would you agree with that?

Not all at once. I think that the more that you say no to things that aren’t giving you return on an investment emotionally, spiritually, financially, or in a humanitarian sense, then you take on too much and you’re doing things where more becomes more and you can’t find a balance. The road to balance is really being strict about what you say yes and no to.

And a lot of people also say that it doesn’t matter where you come from but what you do with your life.

I grew up in a hustler racetrack environment, so I have definitely hustled, but I have a stable relationship with my daughter. I’m a good mother, and there’s a lot of structure and discipline. I have a wonderful, wonderful daughter. She’s an incredible person, so I’m proud of that.

When you look back, was it The Apprentice or The Real Housewives of New York that gave you your big break?

Martha Stewart’s The Apprentice didn’t move the needle. It was next to nothing. It wasn’t a successful show, and Housewives was. I did do some press because as a natural-foods chef, that’s all I wanted to be. But Housewives really tipped the scale.

And now people get to listen to you wherever they go on your podcast, Just B with Bethenny Frankel. How has that evolved?

The podcast is successful, and I had so many people who didn’t want to get into the podcast space with me, and they said, “You can’t make a lot of money doing it anyway. They don’t pay well.” I ended up creating situations by just being passionate about it and liking it. Just like Housewives, I ended up being paid literally nothing in the beginning to now having a multimillion-dollar business in the podcast space.

Of all the people you’ve interviewed, who has surprised you the most?

It surprised me that Kelly Ripa was the most popular episode; I don’t want to say surprising because she’s fascinating and I love her, but I was thinking, wow! Paul, my fiancé, said it was his favorite because it was like “game copies game”—we’re the same age, we’re born close to each other, and we both have come up in our own way being scrappy and probably underestimated. I always remind Kelly that she’s the most successful guest.

Speaking of Paul, you met on a dating app. How did you hit the jackpot with him?

I took it seriously. It was hard for me, though, because it felt like it wasn’t fair to people who knew who I was and I didn’t know who they were, so I was embarrassed [on the apps]. I felt self-conscious and I didn’t like it, so I would go on and off them. I met him pretty early in the process. I came from a different generation, so I felt bizarre and strange. It took me a long time to do it. I just thought it was crazy.

How was the first IRL meeting?

I was at a women’s conference in Boston, and I figured the people on dating apps were all just playing around and meeting different people and I said to him, “A women’s conference is a great place to meet women.” He said to me, “I’m a one-woman kind of guy.” I said, “Oh.” And he said, “But when you’re in New York, I’d like to take you for a drink.” And I said, “Great.” I don’t remember what he asked for, but I told him I was free on Monday from 2 to 4 p.m., which he found to be a winning time slot. [Laughs] So he said, “I’ll take it.” And he took it, and he was just very, very handsome. He’s conservative, appropriate, and funny. But only for an audience of one. He’s not interested in everybody knowing that he can be inappropriate and reverent. He’s great. I did hit the jackpot. Maybe it’s good karma!

It’s a great story!

I think most guys are good, you just have to know how to find them. It’s like fruit. You go to the store and you got to find the good pieces.

What would you tell single millennials right now?

I’m not going to give relationship advice, but I can give advice on meeting someone great. I know that girls say to other girls, “How does she always meet these great guys?” That I know. I know I’m good at meeting good people, attracting good people. My advice is to go for quality versus quantity. Don’t do a volume business. Otherwise, you get nauseated by all the garbage, and then you might miss something good because you’re just over it. Do a lot of research. Know where to look. You have to know how to read a dating app and look for the right things. It’s like going into business and going into a store. You need to know what you’re shopping for and be specific about that. Don’t compromise. You end up down a rabbit hole. You know how on TikTok you end up in some other world that you didn’t know you were in and you’re now looking at buttons or crafts? You need to be in the store that you’re supposed to be in.

What are your top tips for launching your own business?

You have to be honest with yourself about whether you’re an entrepreneur or not. Not everybody is good, and you have to be honest. Everybody thinks it looks so easy and so many people are successful, but it’s gnarly and there’s a lot to deal with. Things will go wrong. If you don’t have the right kind of financial cushion, you could drown. You have to write prenups. You have to know before you get married to somebody that if the ship goes sideways, what’s going to happen. You have to have the fiercest drive, passion, and determination that you could

ever imagine because most people won’t work as hard as you will. When you don’t have kids and when you don’t have all these obligations, that’s when you’ve got to put the pedal to the metal. Later, life is more complicated and it’s hard to find balance and it’s hard to do it all. The truth is, if you want to get something done, ask the busy woman to do it.

What would you identify as your biggest strength?

residence because that’s what we were doing. That was the real reason. I thought it would be just a cute summer place, and it ended up being something that I fell madly in love with. I love the Hamptons year-round. It’s my happy place. I live for it. I have a beautiful house there, but you know what, I have bigger houses elsewhere. It’s just so charming, and you don’t have to be in the scene when you’re

Tell us about your new book, Business Is Personal.

The title says it all. There’s so much gray. If you’re giving up time with your family and putting your all into something that you believe in and putting your money, time, and passion into something you believe in, then it’s entirely personal. You should take it personally. It’s your business. There’s just so many stories, so many anecdotes, and actual

Frankel with fiancé Paul Bernon Fun in the sun with daughter Bryn resources, with how lean we are, has literally never been done in philanthropy. That is pretty remarkable. And the storm is still going on.

You’re always so confident posting on social media in your PJs with no makeup, which so many celebrities don’t do. What do you attribute to your confidence?

It’s not that I’m confident. It’s that I’m a human being. I’m just not painfully superficial and

“YOU HAVE TO HAVE THE FIERCEST DRIVE, PASSION, AND DETERMINATION THAT YOU COULD EVER IMAGINE BECAUSE MOST PEOPLE WON’T WORK AS HARD AS YOU WILL.”

I get things done. Nobody can keep up with me. I’m unstoppable.

And what about your weakness?

It’s probably the same, actually. I’ve never said that before, but that’s probably the same weakness.

You’ve been coming to the Hamptons for years. What initially drew you to the East End?

Frankly, my terrible divorce and me needing a place to take my daughter. To be honest, it was just to not be living in the same there at all. There’s something for everyone. There’s pool culture, music, and bohemian Coachella vibes in Montauk. There’s the whole Lilly Pulitzer and polo vibe in Southampton. In Bridgehampton, there’s the bridge. In Sag Harbor, there’s this cute, charming town. Dinners in Westhampton. There’s just so many places to go. I adore it. I think it’s amazing.

How do you typically spend the Fourth of July?

If it’s nice out, we’re always on a boat. We find a way to see fireworks in a non-stuck-intraffic sort of way. We just drive somewhere and park in a parking lot and watch the fireworks. prescriptive advice for getting what you want. For how to do it. For how so many people can do it and how anybody can do it no matter what your education is, no matter what your business plan is, no matter what your financial situation.

You’ve raised millions for efforts in Ukraine through your BStrong charity. What’s been most rewarding?

The massive nature of it and that it’s literally unprecedented. We can say that. It’s something of this magnitude, with these insecure. If I put up a picture of a hospital that we donated to Ukraine, nobody would give a s*it. I post a picture of myself in a bathing suit with some fake life, some fake bag, some fake vacation, and some fancy car, that ranks. We’re all broke now. It’s like we’re all showing our fake lives so we can one-up other people with a humble brag. Someone’s got to cut through it. Someone’s gotta say, “This is what I look like.” People just believe this myth that everyone’s portraying. I don’t like the filterbased culture. But it’s okay. I’ll be looking like s*it while everyone else looks good. T