The Pine Needle
Table of Contents
St. Christopher’s School ● Richmond, Virginia ● Volume CII ● Issue 3
The Pine Needle is the magazine of St. Christopher’s School. It is run, written, edited and designed by students in grades nine through twelve.
Cover photo by Oliver Hale ’21
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Waite Loss Community Supports Horniks Varsity Swim and Dive Remembering Quent Alcorn New Arts Building Senior-Faculty Game Winter One Acts Bridge Building Competition X-Term Changes X-Term Highlights
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Pole Vaulter Harrison Rice Varsity Wrestling Ian Hairabrant Skype with John Feinstein Cleaning as Punishment New Cameras Around Campus Squash Phenom Ninth-Grade Excursion Robotics Oak Needle
The Pine Needle Staff Editors-in-Chief Kinloch Nelson ’18
Henry Rodriguez ’18
William Rodriguez ’18
Faculty Advisor Mrs. Kathleen Thomas
Freshmen
Layout Editor
Juniors
Hugo Abbot Aubrey Bowles Harrison Coble Curtis Hale Ben Pawlik Willem Peters Collin Taylor Spencer Villanueva Henry Weatherford
Oliver Hale ’21
John Fitzgerald Hunter Gardner Tabb Gardner Bo O’Connor
Sophomores Oliver Sabo Julian Taylor
Seniors Andrew Clark Jack Franko Ian Garrabrant Aidan Messick Thurston Moore
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The Pine Needle
Mr. Waite Loses Weight By
Hugo Abbot
Freshman Staff Writer
When Mr. Jon Waite arrived at St. Christopher’s in 2016, he weighed more than 320 pounds, and he knew he had to make a change. During that year, Mr. Waite was invited to a morning basketball club with Middle School Head Warren Hunter. He enjoys the sport, but said he had to quit because his “knees and hips hurt so bad.” One of Mr. Waite’s main motivations for starting a program to lose weight was from his father, who passed away at age 55 from a heart attack. “Losing my dad was sort of that real thing that made me say, ‘Enough talking about it, let’s actually do something about it.’” As Mr. Waite approached that age, he was concerned about also suffering from bad health.
Mr. Waite tried losing weight first during that Christmas break. He started exercising, but said he couldn’t stick with it due to pain in his hips and knees. He then tried the NutriSystem program, which is known for helping people lose drastic amounts of weight in short periods of time. NutriSystem mainly focuses on cutting down portions and carefully limiting calories while allowing its users to enjoy delicious yet nutritionally balanced meals. He started on April 17, and by the beginning of July, had dropped 75 pounds. “Because I had lost so much weight, I was able to start exercising again,” said Mr. Waite. He coupled the new nutrition plan with an exercise program called P90X, a cardio and martial arts program used mostly for building muscle, but also for losing weight. As he shed pound
after pound, Mr. Waite found exercise became easier and easier. “If you are someone who needs to lose a decent amount of weight, I would say these programs would be good,” he said. Mr. Waite also mentioned that using these programs changed the way he ate. “I don’t eat as much food as I did, and I reduced the number of calories I eat.” Mr. Waite has even inspired some people to try and lose weight too. “They asked me how I did it and what I did, and they decided to try and lose weight as well.” One of the hardest parts this process was the first week of NutriSystem. “You are training your system into living with fewer calories,” Mr. Waite said. “The first two or three weeks, I didn’t see much of a change, but once you see the results, it becomes a lot easier to maintain.”
STC Community Rallies to Support Horniks By Spencer Villanueva and Collin Taylor Freshman Staff Writers
The St. Christopher’s community came together to support Middle School Spanish Teacher Kathleen Hornik and her family after they experienced a devastating fire at their home in Goochland. The community supported the Horniks by giving donations and supplying meals. The Hornik family was renovating their home for eight months when the fire broke out at midnight Dec. 23. The fire marshal of the Goochland Fire Department held an investigation on the cause, but results were inconclusive. The Hornik family believes that it might have been caused by eukula oil-soaked rags self igniting. If eukula oil is left out in the open, it can spontaneously combust. The Horniks found out about the incident after returning to the place they were staying from a Christmas party. Mrs. Hornik’s initial reaction
was shock and disbelief. “Christmas is supposed to be a time of joy and happiness, but this really devastated me and my family.” Most of the family’s possessions were lost, including clothes, toys, appliances and memorabilia. Only the chimney and the foundation were left. The house was only three weeks away from being completed when the fire broke out. Mrs. Hornik was grateful for the response of the St. Christopher’s community. “I am thankful for the St. Christopher’s community helping me and my family during this difficult time.” Fellow teachers, students and friends helped by giving their thoughts and prayers, and 275 of them donated to the family’s GoFundMe page to raise more than $42,000. Also, members of the St. Christopher’s community contributed to a “meal train,” set up by a fellow Middle School teacher, Mrs. Christie Wilson, which supplied
a steady stream of food in the weeks following the fire. The Hornik girls, Stella, Siena and Vivian, “felt like Christmas lasted for weeks” because of all of the support. Mrs. Hornik said, “It was really hard for us to receive this kind of help. I always thought of myself as someone who gives, so it was really hard to be able to receive help.” The Hornik family plans to start anew by rebuilding their house in the same location.
Swim & Dive Makes A Splash By Aubrey Bowles
Freshman Staff Writer
This year’s second place at Preps and third-place finish at States firmly establishes St. Christopher’s as a Virginia swim and dive powerhouse. Swimmers and supporters have witnessed a lot of great swimmers come through St. Christopher’s. The team has been a top competitor for the state championship for the past couple years. Much of that credit goes to Coach Stuart Ferguson, who just finished his fourth season at STC. Coach Ferguson, a seven-time All-American and a five-time South Eastern Conference Champion who came to StC after graduating from the University of Auburn, is building a strong program. “I really wanted to work at a high school and coach this level of athletes,” Coach Ferguson said. “They really want to swim.” He was pleased with the team’s performance at States, after competing against more than 30 teams this season and losing to only six. “We were really good at reacting to unpredictable situations at meets,” he said. “If one guy
couldn’t be on a relay, someone else filled in for him.” One thing that the team could have worked on was not getting too comfortable at St. Catherine’s Kenny Center. “We were not great at traveling,” said Mr. Ferguson. Last year’s team finished first in the state, so this year was nothing new. “We had some really great seniors last year, who were really great on relays,” said Coach Ferguson. This year’s team had eight freshmen, and all eight qualified for states. “Almost half the people on the team were freshmen,” said Coach Ferguson. “It is nice to have numbers coming up through the system.” One of those freshmen, Nick Washington ’21, was on the 200-yard freestyle relay, which also consisted of Hagan Aldridge ’19, Fuller Wise ’18 and Sean Hogan ’18, that placed fourth. The 400-yard freestyle relay of Miles West ’20, Hunter Sundlun ’20, Zach Akin ’18 and Sean Hogan ’19 was All-State, placing third. Gray Broadus ’20 placed third in the one-meter div-
ing. The two wins for St. Christopher’s came from junior sensation Hogan. Hogan reclaimed his titles in the 200-yard individual medley and the 100-yard backstroke. “I don’t really care about getting swimmer of the meet,” said Hogan. “I really like to go out and swim. It’s nice to race.” Hogan was also named swimmer of the meet for the second year in a row. “There are very few people who win swimmer of the meet two years in a row,” said Coach Ferguson. “He is very special.” A big part of the team’s success this year was the leadership and spirit. Hogan appreciated the spirit and cheering while Coach Ferguson credited senior captains Christian Carlow, Fuller Wise and Zach Akin. “Being a captain is hard,” said Coach Ferguson. “You are kind of the bridge between adult and student athletes.” The team expects great seasons will follow. “I think we are going to be great next year and the year after,” Hogan said. “We have a bunch of middle schoolers coming up in the ranks. It’s going to be great.”
Community Remembers Quent Alcorn By
Kinloch Nelson
Co-Editor-in-Chief
After losing his brother Quent ’12, Christian Alcorn ’13 was struggling. Through the grieving process, he threw himself into the things he loved doing, which helped him cope. During his senior year at Williams College, however, as he started transitioning into his professional career, he became older than his brother was when he died. His friends sat him down and encouraged him to seek help. He started meeting regularly with a chaplain. “Asking for help is an amazing moment of strength,” said Christian. “You put some things aside in order to help yourself.” Telling this story was part of Christian and his father Pete Alcorn’s visit to St. Christopher’s Feb. 16 to discuss mental health and the power of asking for help. Since Quent, a student at the University of Virginia, took his life in 2015, the Alcorn family has mourned, but through the process created a way to remember and honor their brother and son. In August 2018, nine of Quent’s friends and family members will climb Mount Rainier in Washington as a fundraiser in Quent’s name for the JED Foundation, a national organization
The Alcorn family at Mount Rainier
dedicated to youth mental health. Both Alcorns thanked seniors Will Forrest and Ralph Levy, founders of the new StC club, Mental Illness Needs Discussion (MIND). “Talking about depression, anxiety and mental illness is the light that cuts through the darkness,” said Mr. Alcorn. He also focused on the strength of the St. Christopher’s community. “You’ve spent more than half your life with the people next to you. You have an incredible support group,” the Alcorns’ father said. “That support group is there for you if you ever need it, but you need to ask.” Christian also talked about his love for St. Christopher’s and its community. “You all make me proud to be a part of this community and this family,” he said. Marshall Hollerith ’13, who wrestled and played football with Quent, took a very early flight from Atlanta that Friday morning to make the chapel presentation. “That space is very special. It’s what every alumni misses most,” he said. “To see different generations of the St. Christopher’s community come together around such an important topic is a really amazing
thing.” Hollerith praised Quent for his selflessness, willingness to challenge himself and love for the community. “He was always putting others before himself. He loved everyone,” said Hollerith. “Quent really embodied all of the attributes of a St. Christopher’s man.” MIND also held a fundraiser for the JED Foundation. Forrest and Levy set up a bracket competition for the 2018 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament and got almost 120 entries, raising more than $600 for the organization. “Lots of people have just been donating, especially teachers,” said Levy. “It’s really great to see the community come together for something like this.” Quent Alcorn ’12 was a 14-year St. Christopher’s student, an All-State wrestler and a Student Council representative who achieved high honors all four years. At UVA, Quent was president of the Theta Chi fraternity and helped coach wrestling at Albemarle High School and St. Christopher’s.
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Senior/Faculty Basketball Game
The Arts Get an Upgrade By
William Rodriguez
Co-Editor-in-Chief
No longer will the musically, theatrically and artistically inclined be confined to the second floor of the Luck Leadership Center and the 2010 Cafe or another spot off campus. Hoping to support a new generation of student creativity on campus, the school administration plans to begin construction this summer on a new recital hall and arts building to branch off from the Middle School. According to St. Christopher’s Development Director Delores Smith, an expansion of the arts program was identified as a priority in 2000. The number of students participating in the fine and performing arts has grown dramatically, as has the need for a facility to support the arts program and to showcase speakers who address our community. The new building will replace the brick classroom wing at the west end of the Middle School building, Wilton Hall. The existing but deteriorating Middle School Auditorium will be renovated to include three classrooms.
The 30,000 square foot facility will stretch from the junior parking lot on Fergusson Road back to the outdoor basketball court. The arts facility will support St. Christophers’ artistic mission by preserving the classic brick-andcolumn exterior of Chamberlayne Hall and Wilton Hall while including the very best modern equipment inside to help students realize the full extent of their creativity. The STC arts center will contain a plethora of new facilities for Upper and Middle School student artists of every medium, including a visual arts studio, art gallery, English/creative writing classroom, individual music practice rooms, band and jazz band practice rooms, state-of-the-art LED lighting and a superb sound system and more. Lobbies on two levels will support receptions following events. The centerpiece will be a 450-seat concert hall and auditorium. With tiered seating, boxes and a section for wheelchairs, the auditorium room will be an ideal place for recitals and performances by the Beaux Ties, Saints Singers, Middle School Choir, Glee Club
and individual student musicians. “We will dig down 20 feet to accommodate the size of the auditorium,” said Mrs. Smith. “It is designed to be intimate enough for the Middle School to have chapel there, yet spacious enough for large events.” The building serves as a shining paragon of the school’s 2nd Century Vision. Students will learn skills such as organization and collaboration within the building’s concert hall, art galleries and music practice rooms. It will also further the school’s more international goals of increasing exposure to foreign cultures’ art and music. “We think the arts center will help foster creativity, a critical part of leadership in a dynamic world,” said Mrs. Smith. Jazz Band Director John Winn said, “We’ve been in the 2010 Café, the Middle School Chapel and the Luck Hall Playhouse. It’ll be great to have a real performance arts center.”
Youthful energy comes up short against experience
By
Harrison Coble
Freshman Staff Writer
tant thing,” Mr. Moore said. “It’s just Faculty members Shawn Moore and the extra pass, the smart penetration or Jon Waite played a vital role to continthe help defense. All of these things are ue the faculty’s streak of dominance. natural and become instinct.” This year’s Senior-Faculty BasketOne of the unsung heroes for the ball Game ended with a fairly close faculty team was Upper School Math score of 40 to 49 with the faculty just Teacher Jon Waite. Foster said that squeezing by the seniors. Senior ClifMr. Waite was a lot more dominant ford Foster said, “The teachers played this year because of his recent workout hard and as a unit which is why they regimen. Foster said, “He lost a lot of won.” weight over the summer and he’s pretty Mr. Shawn Moore, arguably one of jacked now so he was able to establish the most dominant faculty members, a presence inside the paint.” attributed the win to the teachers’ Senior Will Bird, who formerly communication played varsity basket“Obviously, we are the older ball, helped to keep and chemistry. Mr. Moore, who guys, but the basketball IQ is the senior serves as St. the most important thing.” team in Christopher’s the game. director of He played community and inclusion and associwell and consistently ate admissions director, also thought knocked down deep threes. that playing against the varsity basketBird also attributed the facball team in the summer during their ulty’s win to Mr. Waite. practices helped him create a bond with The faculty’s top game coaches Hamill Jones and Stephen plan was to move the ball Lewis. “Obviously, we are older guys, around and get good looks but the basketball IQ is the most impor- and the best shots. They
were able to do this because there weren’t many players on the faculty team, so there wasn’t much subbing, allowing them to get into a rhythm. The seniors tended to throw up more threes which is understandable because of the limited minutes that the majority of the players were getting. They weren’t able to settle in, consistently convert their shot attempts and get in a groove. The class of 2019 will be coming out next year to try to dethrone the faculty team, but the teachers will be looking to protect their crown.
By Henry Rodriguez and Kinloch Nelson
Co-Editors-In-Chief
WINTER ONE ACTS In
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The Pine Needle
Wes Featherstone ’19, Noah Nicholson ’19, Ryan Fortner ’18 and Clifford Foster ’18
A Triumph of Bridge Building Student spirit uplifts competition By
Tabb Gardner
Junior Staff Writer
It was a cloudy Saturday in February, and about a dozen St. Christopher’s “engineers” arrived at the Science Museum of Virginia for the annual bridge building competition. Junior Physics I classes had been working on an important popsicle stick bridge project, and this weight-holding showdown was a final requirement for the activity. Students arrived at the museum with sullen attitudes just wanting to pass the requirement. Unbeknownst to them, they would discover an newfound vigorous school spirit in this much avoided school required event. A little past noon, St. Christopher’s students congregated in the crowded event hall of the museum and took their seats as high schoolers’ bridges were being tested. Most of all the students in the group were just waiting to go home, with no passion for their bridges. This soon changed when STC juniors Wes Featherstone and Blake Douglas decided to make as much fun
out of the academic weekend activity as possible. Both students observed that the crowd was rather quiet for such a high stakes event and began cheering loudly for every bridge being tested. After a few more bridges, almost every St. Christopher’s student was adding cheers and enthusiastically bringing positive energy. The Saints’ bridges were among the last to be tested (and broken) so all juniors were waiting with much anticipation to see their bridges hold as much weight as possible. The first St. Christopher’s bridge showed its might, and it successfully held a thick 12 pounds. Friends and fellow classmates went ballistic and helped demonstrate St. Christopher’s enthusiasm for the sciences. The announcer, noticing our youthful group of passionate engineers, exclaimed that we were “the coolest
engineers he had ever seen.” As more and more Saints’ bridges went up, our approbations became louder. Featherstone’s bridge held a whopping 167 pounds and he shot up with excitement. “Dear God I was hype,” Featherstone said. In the end, St. Christopher’s bridges were nowhere close to winning the competition overall, but this didn’t matter as students transformed a boring school-required event into an enjoyable afternoon of enthusiasm for their peers.
Competition organizers test a bridge.
X-Term Snowed Out? By
Oliver Sabo
Sophomore Staff Writer
While the new changes to X-Term have sparked a lot of questions and criticism, X-Term Director Elsa Woodaman can’t wait for the change. The program will move from the week before spring break to the end of the 2019 school year. The biggest impact will be for seniors who will not be able to participate because their school year will be over. However, “it will allow more students to participate, especially as it applies to travel,” Mrs. Woodaman says. Many students on the track, wrestling and basketball teams, and some spring teams that begin early, have not been able to travel due to athletic commitments. The new date will allow more flexibility for those students and others to leave Richmond.
There is also more flexibility because there will not be snow days in June. Almost every year snow days result in canceled meetings and wasted money that could be used to enhance the X-Term experience. Better weather will also open up the door for more outdoor activities during the week. Mrs. Woodaman added that the move “gives us a week that we definitely need, especially for teaching APs.” This will be helpful for teachers to fit in more lessons and preparation for AP exams, which take place six to eight weeks after the current X-Term. “It will help academically as well.” Mrs. Woodaman said that she was not involved much in the decision for the change in dates. “It was something that has been discussed for years and
years,” she said. “It kind of coincides with Mr. Lecky arriving, but that was being discussed before he came on board.” Mrs. Woodaman said that it is unfortunate that the rising seniors don’t get to participate, but she understands that logistically it probably makes more sense. “I’m sure it’s going to be great because we are going to have more opportunities. ... I’m curious to see how it turns out. I think that it is obvious that we will be able to do more stuff.” As far as seniors missing out, some juniors are opposed to the new change. “I’m a little bit disappointed,” said Alex Johnson ’19. “I kind of wanted another X-Term, but I’m not too mad about it.”
By John Fitzgerald
Junior Contributor
We arrived promptly at 5:15 a.m. in the athletic circle, some of us excited and some hoping to catch a little sleep on the plane, to board the bus to the airport. We were all very excited to travel to India, but this was mixed with fear of the unknown and what was to come over the next 10 days. Our group had gotten to know each other better through the previous XTerm meetings leading up to our trip, but still had not formed many new,
meaningful friendships. Luckily, with a 15-hour plane ride and 10-day trip that would all change. When we finally landed in Delhi and first stepped off the plane, I was not prepared for what was to come. I thought that just reading and learning about the history of India and the sites we would see would be enough. That was clearly not the case. We were surrounded by a place that was totally different than what we, or at least I, had ever experienced. Luckily for us, our guide Rakesh would take us through
this wonderful country step-by-step, allowing us to take in the amazing, yet distinct sights and experiences India had to offer. We immediately witnessed many of the stereotypes that I had heard people mention when I told them I was traveling to India, like the common “Don’t get rabies from all the wild dogs,” or “You’re not going to be seeing anything in that country with all of that traffic.” And while yes, we did see plenty of wild dogs — they are similar to squirrels in the United States — and were
constantly fighting the oppressive traffic (made worse by the “optional” traffic laws), the culture and sights went far beyond these light jabs and narrowminded perspectives. After some light touring on the day of our flight, the India X-Term group went back to our hotel to finally get some sleep. We had a long 10 days ahead, filled with exploring and learning. We saw so much during our trip, temples and mosques, forts, an abandoned city, the place of Gandhi’s assassination and — of course — the Taj Mahal, one of the seven wonders of the modern world. While it might be a touristy spot and traveling cliché, the Taj Mahal was breathtaking when it first came into view. It was an immense, dazzling structure that holds the bodies of Shah Jahan, a Mughal emperor, and his favorite wife, Mumtaz Mahal. The whole structure was so elegant and massive — definitely a trip highlight. Another highlight was our elephant ride up the side of the mountain to the Amber Fort, a magnificent and unique trek and opportunity for me. The view off the mountain into the city of Jaipur with the sun right at the tips of the surrounding mountains, all experienced while rocking back and forth on top of an elephant, is something I won’t soon forget. India was described by trip leader Emmett Carlson as a land of “color, contrast and chaos,” and I think everyone on the trip would agree with this characterization. Between the chaos of the driving and the overwhelming city crowds, the brilliant color of the Holi Festival and the many contrasts of a culture we had never experienced before, this trip was a phenomenal experience. That’s true, not only because I got to visit a place that before I had only known in photographs and videos, but also because of the many good friends I made with all of our group’s members.
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The Pine Needle
X-Term group travels to New York to remember lives lost By
Tabb Gardner
Junior Staff Writer
The skyscrapers towered in the distant horizon as our cohort’s train crested a hill. I was beyond excited to finally go to the Big Apple for the first time. Our group was headed to New York City to study the many impacts 9/11 had on the city and the country as a whole. The cohort was lead by the all-star faculty team of Mrs. Karen Wray, Mr. Clarke Miller and Dr. Christian Cousins, who masterfully organized the trip. The six-hour train ride from Richmond to New York City passed without issue, and we arrived around 6 p.m. on Monday. That night many of us were lucky enough to go to a couple local NBA games. Some of us went to see Nets vs. Bulls and others went to see Knicks vs. Warriors. The following day presented a trip to One World Trade Center and the National September 11 Memorial and Museum. The experience gave me and many others a much better perspective on the event.
Following the memorable time in the museum, students were lucky enough to go off on their own in groups to explore the city after planning with the cohort leaders. This allowed my friends and I to get our own unique experience in the city visiting local attractions and museums. For example, that afternoon we visited the Metropolitan Museum of Art, Central Park and Times Square. The next morning our group was lucky enough to get a tour of the New York Stock Exchange thanks to Alex Johnson ’19’s brother. The amount of technology that has recently taken over the once chaotic space was fascinating to see. It was as quiet as a hushed library in a place I would expect to be riotous. Around lunch we returned to the museum to have a classroom discussion with a teacher at the museum, who facilitated activity and discussion. The rest of the day I used my free time to visit the Museum of Natural History and just walk around the big city. The next day we returned by train
and once again it was more travel with no troubles. Overall, the trip went perfectly, and I had previously never been in a city so large so I was amazed to be in such a different environment. The visits to the museum were probably the most memorable for me, and I loved the opportunity to explore the city for the first time. I’m very glad I got the chance to study one of the most impactful events in American history while simultaneously exploring New York City at my own leisure.
By
Aidan Messick
Senior Staff Writer
Imagine: a week outside the classroom exploring the world of health and pharmaceuticals. This is exactly what a group of Upper Schoolers did for X-Term this spring. With the guidance of Upper School Science Teachers Dr. Dan Fisher and Dr. Austin Sutten, students from St. Christopher’s and St. Catherine’s got to learn about different medical careers. Highlights from the week included visits to Medical College of Virginia’s emergency department and operating rooms and the nonprofit Medicines for All, as well as listening to multiple speakers and volunteering at the Goochland
Free Clinic. Although the initial description given in the fall suggested a focus on pharmaceutical drugs, the cohort evolved to cover more health-related topics when it merged with the Health and Medicine X-Term group. “Once we decided to merge groups with Dr. Sutten’s Health and Medicine X-Term was when we decided to do something that had aspects of both,” Dr. Fisher said. “We were trying to find common themes between drug discovery and health and medicine.” By the end of X-Term it was clear that this goal had been accomplished as the breadth of activities met both groups’ pre-merge interests.
Many of these interests revolved around wanting to learn about the pharmaceutical industry. Some were curious about a public perception of it being corrupt. “I joined because I had always wondered how the pharmaceutical industry worked,” said Ryan Fortner ’18. Most participants said that they had a better understanding than when they started. As a part of this X-Term myself, I can say that I found this experience to be eye-opening. An impressive array of speakers included the following: Dr. John Goodenough, inventor of the lithium ion battery; Virginia Commonwealth University’s Director of Pharmaceutical Engineering Tom Roper and Pulmonologist Michael Polsky. Through their talks I found a greater appreciation for the work of scientists, biomedical engineers and doctors. Every job is critical and it takes everyone, from the research chemists to the marketing team, to get a new drug to the market.
By
Hunter Gardner
Junior Staff Writer
During X-Term this year, I traveled to Scotland and Ireland, witnessing “The Beast from the East” superstorm and touring both countries while having one of the best weeks of my life. The goal of the trip was to be immersed in the diverse cultures of Edinburgh, Scotland and Galway, Ireland. Our hotel in Edinburgh was located in the Grassmarket, an area filled with vendors and occupies the middle of the city underneath the grand Edinburgh Castle. I immediately noticed how different the architecture and layout of the
city was compared to Richmond. Most of the buildings show different styles from many different time periods and appear stacked, row by row, on top of each other due to centuries of building. We walked the Royal Mile, seeing a majority of the cities greatest sights along the way, before ending up at Edinburgh Castle. The titanic fort straddles a massive rocky crag in the center of the city. Unlike Richmond, there are no skyscrapers to block the view so we were able to see every part of the city from its center. The following day in Edinburgh we climbed Arthur’s Seat, a massive hill
in the center of the city offering views like no other. We continued to explore the historic city with visits to Holyroodhouse Palace and the Sir Walter Scott Monument. The following day we took a bus trip to Loch Lomond and the highlands of Scotland, seeing many castles and the gorgeous countryside. The next morning we hopped on a short flight to Ireland, landing in Shannon Airport, and took a leisurely trip across the country to Galway. Once again we had a hotel in the center of the city and the freedom to explore it in small groups.
Live music filled the streets day and night, offering tasteful tunes for our exploration of the city. Galway was much less busy and hectic than Edinburgh and offered a traditional view of Ireland. The next day we took a bus to the the Cliffs of Moher, stopping in the small town of Doolin for lunch in a pub and to purchase authentic Irish sweaters. We got incredibly lucky with the weather at the cliffs because Irish winters are usually overcast and spitting rain. When we arrived, it was partly cloudy and there was a light snow offering an amazing view. The next morning in Galway we were greeted with an incredibly rare Irish snowstorm deemed “The Beast from the East” that gripped the entire country, causing many cancellations — including our plans to hike around Connemara National Park. That day our group continued to explore the city, often mocking the newspapers freaking out over the measly two to three inches of snow. The next day we were supposed to bus to Dublin for a day to explore the city prior to the return to America, but due to the gridlock imposed by the storm, we stayed in Galway for another day. During the extra day we had a snowball fight in the town square against locals and European travelers. We finished off the last day with a trip to an escape room. The travel plans went fine the next day, and we were soon back in America. It was a shame to miss out on Connemara and Dublin, but I couldn’t be happier with how it all played out. I had never been out of the country or really even that far from home before, so it was a completely new experience for me. I made new friends and memories that can’t be replicated, while going to some of the most amazing cities in the world.
By
Bo O’Connor
Junior Contributor
Even before I went to South Africa, my grandparents told me how going to South Africa was the greatest trip of their lives and made sure to say 50 times how I should take many photos as I could to bring back to them. With all of this hype, we were expecting great things and weren’t disappointed. Our first step, the plane ride, did not start out well. As you can imagine, a 24-hour flight in a cramped plane is not the best way to spend a day; nonetheless we arrived in Cape Town eager to take on our adventures. First we rode a cable car up to Table Mountain, which has an extraordinary
view of the entire city below. After that we got a first-hand lesson on the effects of apartheid, still visible to this day even though it ended over 25 years ago. The next day we woke up ready to visit Robben Island, the notorious prison that held Nelson Mandela and many other political prisoners during the apartheid era. We were able to see many whales and penguins swimming in the open ocean on our boat rides to and from the island. The next day we boarded a plane and set off for our next destination, Port Elizabeth. Once we arrived at the city, we were driven to a local school where the marching band made us feel like rock stars with music and fanfare
upon our arrival. There we were able to laugh and connect about similar things while also discussing the differences between our cultures. After our time with the students, we were driven to where we stayed during our time in Port Elizabeth. Our hostel was run by “mamas,” local South African women who help out their community by bringing in tourists, cooking food, and being positive role models in the neighborhood. Our final day in Port Elizabeth and South Africa was a day most of us will never forget. We went on two safaris that day. The first was in an elephant park where everyone lit up with joy at the amount of elephants we saw
that day. None of us had ever seen a wild one before, and it was an amazing experience. Later that day we went on another safari, and that place blew us away with the amount of animals in that park. We saw everything from giraffes to hippos and even rhinos. I think we can all say that it was one of the best days of our lives. If you ever get the chance to go to this beautiful country please do it, because it is a one-of-a-kind experience.
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The Pine Needle
By Willem Peters
Students watch a movie.
By
Henry Weatherford
Collin Taylor ’21 as POTUS of the U.S. and Presidential Bodyguards 1 and 2 in “A New Hope”
Freshman Staff Writer
The world is abuzz with the sounds of electricity, phones, tablets and laptops, but inside the St. Christopher’s library, it is silent save for the turning of pages. The boys in the Sci-Fi Camp X-Term, headed by Upper School Science Teacher Alina Cichocki and Upper School Assistant Librarian Ginny Stone, are reading books they bought from Barnes and Noble and finishing science fiction projects. After lunch, the boys watch a documentary about alien invasions, time travel and space exploration in popular science fiction films and shows such as Independence Day, Doctor Who and Ray Bradbury’s Mars is Heaven. Two days before, the boys had gone to see Black Panther at a movie theater, and a week before watched Star Wars: The Last Jedi.
The boys were split into two teams to either write a short story or create a movie. The movie was about a boy bitten by a radioactive ozobot and conscripted by the “POTUS of the United States” (POTUS of the U.S. for short) to beat an evil doctor who has invented a cloning machine and created an army. The short story was about a man falsely convicted of heresy being imprisoned before escaping and vowing to destroy the life of the man who wronged him. “We got to relax and watch movies the whole week. This was the first time I had time to read a choice book without getting graded.” said Edward Pasco ‘21. But it was not all fun and games for the Sci-Fi camp members. We learned about teamwork and cooperation, as well as the history of literature.
Freshman Staff Writer
Working at the Richmond SPCA was a collection of cleaning, helping out the pets and more cleaning. We wiped down dog kennels, some containing feces and vomit, cleared out litter boxes and flushed out transportation vans. These less desirable jobs were balanced out with more fun tasks such as filling the dogs’ chew toys with peanut butter, playing with the animals and creating houses where cats can climb and hide. This was all part of our ninth-grade X-Term, supervised by Language Department Head Sue Varner. Our first day there we took a tour through the places we would be focusing on during our time there. These places varied from the cat lounges, dog kennels, agility course and birthday party room, which we would later find out to be our cafeteria. Although the tour helped us gather our bearings, it only revealed a small portion of what we had in store when we started to get to work. When we arrived for our first day of volunteering, we brought our donations of throw blankets, peanut butter, disinfecting wipes and various brands of dog and cat food with us. The rest of the day was about meeting the dogs, learning how to handle them when going on walks and starting to clean the cages and kennels. From the start, most of us chose whether we preferred walking and helping the dogs or playing and socializing with the cats. The favorite pets of the group were also chosen quickly. “Finn was my favorite. ... He was a bundle of energy and just a lovable dog for the whole group.” said Hugo Abbot ’21. As the week progressed, the difficulty of our tasks also increased the longer we volunteered. This meant tougher and less appealing cleaning jobs, detailed sorting of various papers and documents and the struggle of eating very similar lunches every day. Although the jobs got harder, we got better at doing them, which allowed us to finish faster and gave us time to hang out with the pets. The SPCA X-term was a lot of fun for the whole group, and we got more than half of our volunteer hours completed in one week. It was productive and enjoyable at the same time, and if you ask a participant, it’s almost guaranteed he will recommend it.
By Ian Garrabrant
Senior Staff Writer
A fiberglass pole in hand, he swallows hard. Harrison Rice ’18 is sick. He doesn’t think he has to throw up again, but a faint taste of vomit lingers as the noise of the meet around him drowns out his thoughts, and he starts to run down the track. He reaches the moment and plants his pole, catapulting him up into the air and over the bar
until he falls back down onto the mat. Now it’s a race back to the trash can as the nausea returns. Can’t imagine ever being that determined? For pole vaulter Harrison Rice, that was his reality on Feb. 3 at the 111th New York Road Runners Millrose Games in New York City, where he finished second with an impressive 16 feet and 3/4 of an inch.
Rice’s success at the Millrose Games is just a recent example of his perseverance and determination in pursuing pole vaulting, not just as a way to fulfill his athletic requirement but as a key part of his future. Rice recently committed to Virginia Tech and had a lot to say about his St. Christopher’s journey as a pole vaulter. Rice began pole vaulting his fresh-
man year. “I was going to be on the basketball team, but I knew I wasn’t very good so I just went to track,” Rice said. When Coach Key Randolph ’84 asked him if he wanted to try pole vaulting, he said yes. From that inauspicious beginning, Rice went on to jump 8 feet 6 inches at his first meet. “I remember being pretty nervous, but it wasn’t a big deal,” Rice says of his first event. “I knew I was bad.” It wasn’t until the outdoor state meet of the same year that Coach Randolph, who teaches English in the Upper School, would notice his talent. “When he vaulted 13 feet in the outdoor state meet as a freshman, I went ‘huh, I think this guy could be pretty good,’” Coach Randolph said. After that, he began pushing Rice to train more, both in and out of school. Rice is appreciative of the coaches’ continued support, saying, “They definitely see my potential, and they’re willing to help me. It’s nice too because there’s not any real competition in the Prep League, and they place me in meets where [there] are actually good jumpers.” Rice believes this commitment outside of the school and its normal competition has been integral, not only to his own success, but to the success of every amazing pole vaulter. Coach Randolph agrees. “He’s a good student of the event,” Coach Randolph said. “He’s worked extraordinarily hard outside of school, working year round on vault-specific activities. He’s spent time studying his own technique and the technique of other good pole vaulters.” Coach Randolph’s words are supported by Rice setting the St. Christopher’s school record of 15 feet 9 inches as a junior. Even others in the St. Christopher’s community have noticed Rice’s diligence. “The other day I walked by his
house on the way to my car, and Mr. Randolph exited his house and waved at me,” said Henry Rodriguez ’18, who lives next door to Rice. “They were talking about pole vaulting or something. It just shook me.” Rice continues to maintain this level of commitment, even after signing with Virginia Tech. “I don’t like to put a number in my head for height just because if you don’t reach it it’s frus-
trating, but I’d really like to break the Prep League record which is 16 feet 9 inches and outdoors I’d like to jump in the 17s,” Rice said. “ I’d also like to get to World Youths in Finland this summer and compete there.” Mr. Randolph is also optimistic about Rice’s future with pole vaulting, saying, “Pun intended, he still has a lot of upside.”
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The Pine Needle
Saints Wrestling Back on Top By Julian Taylor
Sophomore Staff Writer
Early in the season, beginning in late November, the varsity wrestling team dealt with a number issues that were difficult to overcome. When the season began, the team didn’t have a complete roster. Many members were finishing up fall sports, and others had not met their weight requirements for the upcoming season. In addition, the team suffered from a lack of bonding early on. “It was challenging to form a sense of cohesion or culture within the team at the beginning of the season,” said head coach Ross Gitomer, who is in his fourth season at the helm of the program. From the get-go, the team had to use its limited squad to the best of its abilities for the time being. But the team persevered and picked up big wins against the top two teams in the Virginia Wrestling Association poll, Christiansburg High School and Battlefield High School. One major component to overcoming these struggles was the time that the teammates spent together. Wrestling is different from most sports in the amount of travel required. This year’s group traveled to Ohio, Georgia and a few other states scattered throughout the East Coast to participate in elite tournaments. “Spending time on the bus helped us bond because when you’re on a bus for several hours you have to talk to each other and form bonds,” said team captain Jens Ames ’18, a four- year varsity wrestler who will play football next
year at Washington and Lee University. Although the season was filled with intense matches and tough competition, the team had fun while earning the #1 spot in the state of Virginia. Ames recalled one of his funniest memories of the season down in Atlanta for the Prep Slam tournament. “We had a team meeting the night before the tournament,” he said. “The coaches were all trying to get us pumped up and Assistant Coach [Ian] Squires interrupted Coach Gitomer in the middle of this serious meeting and started reciting Martin Luther King’s ‘I Have A Dream’ speech which was really funny and took some of the pressure off.” Another senior, Gray Hart, had a fantastic last season of his high school wrestling career. Hart, who will continue wrestling next year at the University of Virginia, finished his career with a 177-44 record, two individual VISAA Championships and back-to-back AllAmerican distinctions at the National Prep Tournament. “It was important for me to lead by example for the younger freshmen,” said Hart. “I would have to win matches by several points in order for
us to gain bonus points.” Junior Jackson Turley also stepped into the national spotlight with wins at the prestigious Escape the Rock and National High School Coaches Association tournaments. “To put it simply, he has freak ability,” said Gitomer of Turley. “He is getting a lot better very quickly is because he is respecting his training more now than he ever has.” This was a year of many record breaking moments for the team, and according to Hart, “the best season that the St. Christopher’s varsity wrestling team has ever had.” The team did not let early struggles affect the season outcome or prevent them from prevailing at the VISAA state tournament, which they had lost to archrival Benedictine for the past four years. The Saints dominated the tournament and had individual champions in seven out of the 14 weight classes. Along with their #1 VAWA ranking, which ranks both private and public schools, the win reestablished St. Chris as the premier wrestling program in the state. Jack Franko’18 contributed to this article.
Ian Hairabrant By
Oliver Sabo
Sophomore Staff Writer
Ian Garrabrant ’18 donated his hair to charity because he figured there was probably somebody who needed it more than he did. Garrabrant’s grandfather had pancreatic cancer and complained about hair loss from his treatments, so Garrabrant knew from that earlier experience that someone was almost certainly in need. After three and a half years of growing it out, Garrabrant had his 13-inch blonde ponytail cut to donate to Wigs for Kids, a nonprofit that provides hair to cancer patients. He chose it over Locks of Love because of its recent public controversy regarding unaccounted for hair donations. Garrabrant said that the process was simple. There are some requirements on the Wigs for Kids website pertaining to length and condition of the hair. He said, “If you are going to donate your hair, it
seems like a good charity to do it with.” He describes the process as easy. In late December, he went to Rituals Salon and Spa in Chesterfield, and they cut it all right off. They then gave him the choice of how the remaining hair was to be styled. He enjoyed having his long hair, which went down to his chest, in the winter because it kept his neck warm. “Besides that, the hardest part was maintaining it. My morning routine is a whole lot faster now. I have no idea how most of our female teachers get into school on time. It befuddles me.” Garrabrant says that he took forever to get out of his house. He described the long hair as a “tedious project.” Garrabrant always kept his hair in a ponytail. He avoided the man bun because he didn’t fit the manbun lifestyle. “I wasn’t a bartender, I didn’t live in LA.” He plans to enjoy some short hair for the foreseeable future, but when he does grows it out he wants to donate it again.
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The Pine Needle
Author John Feinstein Skypes with Students By Jack Franko
Senior Staff Writer
With the NCAA tournament approaching, college basketball was a hot topic of discussion with Middle School boys. Many had high hopes for top-seeded University of Virginia. Others saw Michigan State University and Purdue University as underrated teams from the Big 10. Forty-five of these middle schoolers were lucky enough to get expert insight from sports writer and young adult novelist John Feinstein during a video conference early this February. Feinstein, known for working with and having personal relationships with coaches such as Mike Krzyzewski, Dick Vitale and Tom Izzo, gave lots of insight to the boys whom he saw as the frontrunners this year. But Feinstein wasn’t just focused on the blue bloods of college hoops.
The author known for his novels about fictional scandals at some of our country’s most famous sporting events, like the Masters Tournament and the Army-Navy game, has recently shifted his focus to smaller stories. He spent the past season with basketball teams at several smaller schools in the Patriot League, including Alex Petrie ’17 and his teammates at Lafayette College. Feinstein said that he prefers games at smaller colleges because oftentimes they’re more intense, have a better atmosphere and players aren’t as jaded as they might be at larger colleges and in the pros. The video conference was mostly a question-and-answer session, and the boys kept the questions coming. Many of the questions were about Feinstein’s newest book, “Backfield Boys,” which is about the football team at a fictional
boarding school in Virginia. The school described is a sports-focused school similar to real-life schools like IMG Academy that place emphasis on getting athletic college scholarships for students. But seeing these types of schools pop up across the country hasn’t left a positive impression on Feinstein. “I think that they put too much pressure on students to go pro, and the cost of tuition makes college scholarships pointless,” he said. Middle School Librarian Lisa Brennan, who organizes events like this regularly, was impressed with both Feinstein and the enthusiasm the boys showed at the event. “Feinstein was a natural at making an immediate connection with our audience,” Mrs. Brennan said. “On a scale of one to 10, it was an 11.”
Students Serve Time in the Library By
Tabb Gardner
Junior Staff Writer
Every day, students in the library toil away on papers, assignments and reports under a low tone of ambient chatter. Starting this fall, frequent library users witnessed a newly established form of punishment where students dust and organize to serve their time. The new way of serving Time Outs, Hours and Breakfast Clubs for Head of Discipline Greg Tune emerged when Librarian Marsha Hawkins requested aid with cleaning. Previously, both she and fellow Librarian Virginia Stone had to clean the bookshelves a few times each week. With a devious smile on his face, Mr. Tune happily made library labor an option for serving time. Sentenced students must turn in their phone before entering the library to make sure they
can work undistracted. The youthful “volunteers” spend anywhere from 15 minutes to entire class periods dusting and wiping down every nook and cranny of the entire space. Will Bird ’18 was forced to clean the library for an entire class period every day for a week, a punishment for his fabled “Powerade incident,” when he soiled part of the library floor with a spilled sports drink. When frequent student janitors spend so much time tidying, the library can get but only so clean. After Scotch Nelson ’18 had spent more than an hour and a half doing his sentenced cleanings, Mrs. Hawkins knew the library was as orderly as it could be. The labor didn’t end there. Nelson was ordered to take a stroll on his creative side and piece together some engaging signs for various locations
around the athenaeum. In the end, Nelson (involuntarily) took time out of his day to improve the school’s cherished reference center. Voluntary or not, the arduous labor is improving the valuable space that many students use on a daily basis. Mrs. Hawkins’s main goal is to have “a library that is clean and welcoming for everyone,” and this new form of discipline gives the students a sense of stewardship in the space. Both librarians have been pleasantly surprised with how helpful the additional aid has been. They say the new form of serving time has proven to be beneficial to both the students and the librarians all while making the space a much better place.
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By
Curtis Hale
Freshman Staff Writer
Following the shooting that killed 17 people at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Florida, there is a question as to what St. Christopher’s should do to improve security on campus. Mr. Lecky said, “I think students and faculty will continue to see an enhanced presence of Richmond police officers” meaning that their time on campus will “only increase.” One of the most appealing aspects about St. Christopher’s campus is its openness, but it provides challenges for security. Mr. Lecky wants to maintain an open campus, but he said the issue of so many open, exterior doors will most likely be addressed in the months and years ahead. “We now have a capability with these ID cards, that with some adjustments they could be used for access purposes by students and that might be a change that we make in the coming months,” Mr. Lecky said.
After spring break, Mr. Lecky met with a sergeant of the Richmond Police Department, who observed and reviewed St. Christopher’s lockdown procedures. The sergeant’s feedback was positive. “In fact he has said to me repeatedly he thinks our procedures are among the best he knows of any public or private school in the area,” Mr. Lecky said. In addition, the school has put cameras to monitor activity in the Gottwald Science Center, Chamberlayne Hall and Kemper Athletic Center. Many students have opinions on this matter. Ian Garrabrant ’18 believes that we should create an anti-shooting environment internally because most shooters either go to the school or have recently graduated from the school. Robert Mish ’21 said that he believes security should be increased around campus. “I think that it would definitely be beneficial to maybe have an armed security guard, especially in the case of a school shooting.”
Bundy Squashes Opponents
Quinn Bundy ’18 leads Saints to fifth at nationals
By
Aubrey Bowles
Freshman Staff Writer
St. Christopher’s might have just witnessed one of the best squash players to ever come up through the program. Quinn Bundy ’18 started playing squash when he was just 8 years old. “My dad played, so I went with him to his matches to watch,” said Bundy. He has been playing squash all around Richmond and is very well known. “I like to compete. I like to win,” said Bundy. Squash has become a big part of his life. “It has always been my main sport. I enjoy it a lot,” Bundy said. He is a big reason why the squash team did so well this year. Bundy has been coached by Patrick Chifunda since he began playing. “Patrick was a pro in squash. He knew what
he was doing,” said Bundy. Chifunda is also the coach of a St. Christopher’s team, which did not disappoint this year. The team had a record of five wins and four losses, one of the best records they have had in a long time. “We had one of our best seasons,” said Bundy. “I really enjoyed working with a great group of guys.” The squash team performed very well for most tournaments, but their best performance was at Nationals. Bundy beat all of his opponents, going undefeated. The team went 3-1, placing fifth, their best performance ever at the tournament. Squash is becoming a popular sport at St. Christopher’s, mostly because of the team’s success. “Squash is starting to grow at St. Chris,” Bundy said. “A
lot of people are beginning to do contract squash.” The team had 12 players on the roster, with nine of them returning. “We have a lot of young talent on this team,” Bundy said. “We will be really good in the years to come.” Bundy was the only captain of the squash team, and a lot of his teammates looked up to him. “He was the best player on the team,” said teammate Clifford Foster ’18. “He knows what his opponent’s weaknesses are, and he plays with intelligence. Quinn has potential in college.” He wants to continue his success at the college level saying, “I would love to play squash in college. I am currently looking at the University of Virginia and Sewanee, and I would really like to play.”
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The Pine Needle
“A Raisin in the Sun” Brings Students Together By
Collin Taylor
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Photos by Aaran Sutton, Jerold Solomon, Jasmine Eileen Coles, Katrinah Carol Lewis and Bru Ajueyitsi
Robotics Takes on Relic Recovery
Freshman Staff Writer
When the freshman boys and girls of St. Christopher’s and St. Catherine’s found out that they were to sit through a three-hour play without food, the overall reaction was negative. Still most students exited the theatre with a new understanding of what life as an African American is like. All students had read the play, “A Raisin in the Sun,” prior to the grade-wide excursion in late February at the the Sara Belle and Neil November Theatre in downtown Richmond. We read the play beforehand as part of our study in Art Department Chair Rusty Willson’s class, Creativity Through the Arts, a requirement for all ninth-graders. Many of us read it without fully understanding the issues it addressed. “A Raisin in the Sun,” set in the South Side of Chicago in the ’50s, revolves around the Youngers, who receive a $10,000 life insurance payment following the death of their grandfather. The play explores themes of poverty and race as each family member dreams about how the money will be spent. While watching the play put on by Virginia Repertory Theatre, students and even some teachers were hit with harsh reality. For
example, when the family moves forward with buying a house in a white neighborhood, the neighborhood tries to buy the house back, the Rev. Whitney Edwards said, “It was like a knife to the chest.” According to many attendees, the play made its audience ask themselves complex, uncomfortable questions. These questions are a reality for many of their black peers, myself included. When the actors addressed white people touching black people’s hair many of the white people were confused, while a lot of the black students related. After the play, the director offered students the chance to ask the actors questions. Cameron Ofogh ’21 asked, “Why are there so many racist films?” The actors responded, “Hollywood only makes what people watch.” The character development and threedimensional personalities were based on past experiences involving race. Most of these experiences are common among the black community. When the white students were able to at least see the negative events that many black people may experience on a daily basis, they were able to put themselves in their shoes.
Aidan Messick
Senior Staff Writer
For those students who wish to seek intellectual challenges outside of the classroom, the St. Christopher’s Robotics Team has long been called a home. Meeting Tuesday nights after school, the group works to build a working and competent robot to compete in the annual First Technology Challenge (FTC). Despite the common perception that robotics is for math and science people only, our team is made of people with a variety of interests. From Ampersand actors to varsity football players, Robotics is a unique melting pot where the common denominator is simply the desire to create. When I joined as a sophomore, I knew nothing about robots or the engineering design process. Thankfully the team has a great mentor in Science Department Chair Billy McGuire, who taught me most of what I know about robotics. Mr. McGuire is always willing to lend a helping hand and share his extensive experience, yet also pushes students to find solutions themselves.
This style of teaching has changed how I think as both a student and a person. Since starting robotics, the past three years have been as much a character journey as an academic journey. While I have learned much about motors, structural design and circuits, I have also learned broader skills as well, such as how to work on a team and how to lead one. This past year the team worked to compete in the Relic Recovery FTC challenge. The robot went through many iterations, as things such as the arms, color sensors and autonomous programming were tested and improved. The final product ended up finishing higher in match play than all previous St. Christopher’s robots, coming within just two wins of taking the regional tournament. As the end of high school approaches, the time also comes to pass the torch from this year’s senior team members to the juniors and underclassmen. I find myself slightly sentimental as I am about to leave the team that I have grown close to during the past four years.
At the same time, I am proud and thankful to have been a part of such a great team and group of people. I am confident that next year’s team will be great, and I encourage anyone who is interested in taking that next step to join, as I guarantee that building a robot from the ground up is one of the most rewarding things you can do in Upper School.
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36
The Pine Needle
The Oak Needle
Overly Affectionate Couple in Library Fined for Multiple Infractions
St. Christopher’s Finest News Source
Easter Egg Hunt Disaster By Tabb Gardner
Junior Staff Writer
Students rushed out of the chapel like their lives depended on it, for they had just received word that a whopping $25 prize was hidden somewhere on campus within a golden Easter egg. The festive Easter egg hunt was enacted by the Student Council with good intentions, but they had no idea how far the student body would go for a chance at the big money. Students dispersed all over campus within the blink of an eye and shoved any faculty member out of their way with violent results. Most St. Christopher’s scholars couldn’t even comprehend the limitless possibility of the prize. A $25 prize could buy an entire week of Chick-Fil-A or Sugar Shack if budgeted properly, so the undying hunger of high schoolers would stop at nothing to claim such a bounty. Michael Chapman ’18 said he would
finally be able to purchase some gas for his car, which has currently been sitting vacant and without fuel in the Senior Lot since late September. Chapman was last seen climbing Headmaster Mason Lecky’s house for “a better vantage point” to try and find the golden egg. Bushes were being rummaged through, and no place was off limits to such a desperate crowd. Senior Will Bird was seen diving into one of the large dumpsters behind the Luck Leadership Center and has yet to be seen since. It wasn’t five minutes before the much sought after golden egg was found by Thurston McCain Moore ’18, whose wealthy and influential family had funded the egg hunt in the first place. “I do declare,” Moore declared, “this sum shall finance my family farm quite nicely.”
Levar Stoney Quits Job as Mayor, Becomes Professional Chapel Speaker
SEAA Members Jailed After Alleged “Human Recycling”
Pollen on Senior Porch Now Scoopable
Teachers Concerned Over Student Obsession with “Fork Knife”
Mountain Biking Forfeits 28th-Place Trophy After Scandal By William Rodriguez
Co-Editor-in-Chief
Morning chapel was thrown into disarray this Monday when several official-looking men in suits burst through the center doors, pushed aside disciplinarian Greg Tune, and ripped the mountain biking team’s 28th place ribbon from the hands of team captain Jack Anderson ’18 just as he was presenting it to Mr. Lecky. What was sure to be excited cheers died on the lips of the assembled crowd of teachers and students as one of the men whispered something into Mr. Lecky’s ear, then walked out the door with the award in tow. Mr. Lecky awk-
wardly considered this new situation for a few seconds, then told the student body that the mountain biking team’s 28th place ranking had been declared invalid by agents from the National Interscholastic Cycling Association, or NICA. “We just wanted to get a ribbon this time!” said Anderson, as NICA officials hauled him away in handcuffs. According to the formal NICA report, the mountain biking team had bribed a low-ranking cycling official to move them from their original ranking of 35th place to 28th. Thirtieth place and
below had been the threshold for a team to win a cheap polyester ribbon from Walmart. Most of the general public has been relieved by the news. One unnamed junior said he was glad to see that “these dangerous criminals were no longer corrupting honest cycling competitions.” Still, others held conflicting opinions on the matter. Oliver Hale ’21 maintained that regardless of legality, he’d actually been excited by the biking team’s progress over the course of the season. “They seemed to be on a real upward trend,” he said.
Licata Serves Breakfast Club
New Arts Center to Feature Giant, Golden Statue of Mason Bates
Mr. Britton Wrestles Raccoon By Tabb Gardner
Junior Staff Writer
Math teacher Jeb Britton faced an enormous challenge this spring when he discovered a North American Raccoon (Procyon lotor) making a nest in his utility shed. In the middle of yard work, Mr. Britton was desperate to retrieve his 300 horsepower John Deere turbo lawn cutter, so the raccoon had to be evicted as soon as possible. Mr. Britton, a talented strategist, spent two weeks using his free time to map out and plan a mathematically precise attack. The determined teacher filled his home office with papers and maps stacked to the roof. Mr. Britton described the process as “lengthy but
necessary.” As D-Day approached, he prepared his weapons, a plastic twohanded rake and a military grade stun grenade. The man was ready for war. The day of the assault had arrived, and Mr. Britton stood outside the door of his raccoon occupied storage shed. He began the attack opening the door, and Mr. Britton threw his one and only stun grenade.He then rushed to cover before making his charge to shield his eyes from the blinding grenade. Due to a mathematics error with the calculated lob of the grenade, the explosive missed the door completely. Mr. Britton stood in horror as the grenade bounced directly in front of his eyes. With a loud pop and a bright flash with the power of nine thousand suns,
Mr. Britton was rendered nonfunctional as he crumpled to the ground, trying to grasp where and when he was. About four hours later, Mr. Britton mustered up the strength, and hobbled, rake in hand, into the dark depths of his usurped utility shed. The wild beast charged the math teacher with gusto and leapt forth in attack. Mr. Britton’s reaction time was just fast enough to just evade the brute taking only a small scratch to the face. As for the invader, he continued to fly out the door and made landing on Mr. Britton’s beautiful yard. Mr. Britton smiled victoriously as his enemy scampered away in defeat, never to be seen again.
X-Term Highlights p.13-24
Wrestling Back on Top p.27
Robotics p.34
New Arts Building p.5