BE BOLD // ISSUE 1 by Jennifer Xia

JUNE 2018

BE BOLD Â

AN INTRODUCTION //

Hello friends, Welcome to this new project of mine. My name is Jennifer Xia. I am 17 going on 18 and I currently am an incoming senior in high school. I have wanted to pursue this platform for a while now and it’s time to take that courage. Writing and sharing stories has always been something I have turned to time and time again in all the different ways life has presented itself to me. I want this to be a place for people to come together in ways that speak beyond these pages and for people to find pieces of themselves and others in what these pages have to offer. I want to bring a voice to youth in showing that we have weight and value in what we say and what we are capable of. I can’t wait to start this journey. This is Be. jennifer xia founder & editor-in-chief

With love, Jenn

CONTENTS // June Tunes // 1 Summer // 2 Photos – Light // 3-4 What it Means to be Human // 5 What Makes you Feel Alive? // 6 Photos – The Garden in me // 7 Take That Leap of Faith // 8 4 Things my mom Taught me // 9 Photos – Mom // 10 Photos – Bloom // 11 Journal Snippets // 12 Meet Jessica Qiu // 13-15 Human Sunshine // 16 Photos – By the Water’s Side // 17-25 Quote // 26 Advice for Incoming Seniors From Graduates // 27-28 Photo – Smile // 29

Photo – Be Open to the Good // 30

JUNE TUNES big jet plane // angus and julia stone cough syrup // young the giant daydreamer // bipolar sunshine dreams // the cranberries drive // oh wonder electric love // borns goodie bag // still woozy heat wave // snail mail in the waiting // kina grannis just the same // bruno major lady sunshine // appleby no going back // yuno teardrops // neil frances 8teen - khalid

Summer brings color and vibrancy to cheeks and hearts alike.

During the summer, the sun is high in the sky and strikes the earth with a new courage that lets us know she is here to stay. The neighborhood opens its shutters and cleans out the layers of skin and dust from winter’s hold. And the streets come to life with the sounds of sneakers pounding the pavement and deep-rooted laughter, worn out soles and t-shirts full of holes that summer has aged. The walls of peoples’ homes are projected with the golden shards of sunrises and sunsets, pieces that no one is able to keep but somehow that makes them hold onto the light longer. It is comforting knowing that the sun is always there. Gardens are filled with the new promise of tomorrow, fresh buds unearthing despite the weight on their shoulders that they’ve always known. The air smells sweet, of freshly cut grass and warm smoke, as friends and family come together to rekindle new beginnings. The sky erupts with the color of hope and wonder and everyone is okay with feeling small for once. As the indigo night finds its way across the sky, the streetlights flicker on and the pavement starts to glow. The birds leave the limelight to the crickets and the shutters stay open, no longer desperate to close out the night. Calloused feet and sweat-stained cheeks find their way to fresh sheets, unafraid to face the next day knowing that the sun will be there. Summer is here to stay.

WHAT IT MEANS TO BE HUMAN .............................................. There is more pressure than ever to be perfect, to dress your house in a white picket fence and to brace life with no trace of a grimace. But there is a lot of pain in living that way. You live your life by comparison and you find yourself with a hunger that it is never satisfied. And you deserve better than that. The wonderful thing about you is that there are things that you bring to the world that only you are capable of saying, of showing, and of doing. And how that compares to someone else does not make you any less. We must celebrate each other’s success as our own triumph and not as our failure. It is so incredibly easy to pick yourself apart, to accept that you are the exception to all the giving you show the ones you love, to think that you are the only one that feels lost. But your struggle is part of the story and those are the moments that make all the difference. They fuel the embers that are your strength that burn even brighter in the dead of night. Life isn’t always easy but you aren’t alone in experiencing that and it’s okay to falter. Skin folds over in rolls when bodies bend over. Minds choke on the smell of fear. Hands misplace papers. Mouths forget how to speak. But your imperfections are beautiful. You make mistakes. You own them. You grow. The dark makes the world that much brighter. And you are wonderfully human.

WHAT MAKES YOU FEEL ALIVE? The pavement moves beneath me like a cool glass of water, my throat guzzling it down smooth and fast. I’ve got rollerblades strapped to my feet and I see the world differently than simply a 2-inch higher vantage point. My shadow joins me by my side but today I am in control and it will meet the sun today. I turn my body towards the main road because the sidewalks are cracked and don’t have enough room. And in this moment, I am unapologetic of the space I occupy. I turn the corner and my heart leaps as I start to skate to the top of the hill, lactic acid building up in my muscles, pain trying to convince me that the climb isn’t worth it. The shadow beneath me beckons me to rest. It knows how familiar its bite is, cold but somehow comforting. But the sun flashes on my shoulders, cascading its way between my fingertips and to my feet, illuminating the ground with a speckled smile. Above all else, people and nature have proven to me that life can be beautiful. So I keep climbing. And them I am off. And the wind ripples at my clothes, hair and eyes wild, but the hurricane doesn’t tear through my chest and I am untouchable. I break into a smile as wide as my hands spread outward, trying to touch the sky, trying so desperately to hold onto this feeling as I near the bottom. As I eventually settle to the ground in the shade, pavement cool to the touch with the calm of the morning sea, I remember the pain. And it feels foreign to think I would have given up before I reached myself. So I take with me the struggle, the triumph, and the strength to hold on. I make my way back, a smile stained onto my lips, taking the long way home.

take that leap of faith

4 THINGS MY MOM TAUGHT ME Do not sacrifice your personal interests to please others. My mom is headstrong, steadfast in her beliefs, both in herself and the things she knows she can do and wants to do. She knows that sometimes, this makes life harder for her because she doesn’t live her life according to the opinion of others. My mom has endured many hardships in life by speaking up, but she does not waver. She is loud in her honesty and is willing to fight for herself. This is apparent in even the smallest circumstances, such as remaining persistence at the cash register to get the deal she asked for or negotiating a higher pay for the work she contributes. I am not as strong as her, nowhere near. I avoid conflict as much as I can and my heart races at the hint of anyone’s anger or annoyance. But if she has taught me anything, it is that you cannot please others so willingly at the expense of your own happiness. Not everyone is going to like you. And that’ is okay. It is not your fault. Each person you meet is going to hold a different impression of you in their head and that to an extent, is out of your control. And that is okay. The best you can do is be the best person you can be and that means being yourself. Make the most out of what you have. As my older sister left the house and is off pursuing her independence and accomplishing amazing things in medical school and with me soon in college, the house grows seemingly larger as the rooms quietly empty. My mom started making our home beautiful, clearing the shelves of the dust and clutter, and filling our neglected backyard to the brim with gushing green herbs and flowers. This year, it seemed that each day I came home to a new member of the zoo. One day, she told me to walk upstairs with a glimmer in her eye and there behold was a bunny. Now we have a dog, a cat, a bunny, hermit crabs, and too many fish to name. She sat me down one day and told me how important

it was to cherish every single moment, every victory, every person. She told me how she gravitates towards getting so many pets because they give her company and motivate her to keep pushing. This made me want to cry. Find what keeps you going, what makes you feel loved and valued, and surround yourself with those things and people. Make your circumstances beautiful in the ways you can control. Work hard and prepare yourself for success. At age sixteen, my mom was already at college. In her earlier schooling, she walked the long distance to school each day, determined to focus on her academics and exceed her limits. In college when she became too sick to go to class for a whole semester, she studied hard and was still second in her class. She struggled with organic chemistry and guess what she majored in. That’s right. She knows how to prepare and do well and doesn’t take no for an answer. My mom strives in adversity. And so can you. So can I. We are capable of great things if we let ourselves struggle to achieve it. You deserve someone who makes you feel secure in yourself and in each other. My mom and dad have always shared their story of love at first sight, though sometimes my mom likes to deny it. But my dad is insistent that it is the only way. That the first time he laid eyes on my mom, he simply knew. More importantly, my mom told me that your partner needs to make you better and is there faithfully in your times in need. Someone who will always listen and trust you, even when you sound crazy. It is the people that stay by our sides when we are at our worst, our most down moments, our unsteady selves, that deserve us. My mom and dad have endured long distance for years on and off, have held strong in their trust, and I am happy to say that they are reunited right here at home again. I am very grateful for the people I have in my life that make me feel just that, that stay true to me despite any insecurities I may have. Even if you tell someone this every day, tell the person you love him or her again. Tell them to buckle their seat belt. Tell them to eat a good breakfast. Tell them when you see something that reminds you of them. Brush their hair to the side. Make them feel special. And let others give back to you, to allow yourself to receive a love that is never taken for granted. These are 4 lessons from my mom to you.

12 My friend had a dream about meeting the perfect girl and woke up sad that she wasn’t real and that he would never We afraid talked to literally forher. hours andhim we that he find her. He was look for I told honestly could have gone on longer. would when the time was right and that she would be even -August 2015 better than the girl he6,met in the dream because she would be real. -July 29, 2016

I still feel warmth to you. -May 7, 2015

It all leaves you when you’re having fun. -May 29, 2015

The sun was jealous of the light we shared. -April 4, 2015

JOURNAL SNIPPETS I think there is no place more honest than within the pages of a I think you can tell a lot about a person by what and who they think about right before he or she sleeps. Your mind cannot help but go to places even if you tell yourself you’re over it. -June 22, 2016

journal, a place where hearts openly spill, vulnerable and true in all the beauty and ugly alike. I have never had the success of keeping up with a journal daily, excuses of exhaustion or having nothing to say. But I scribble small thoughts and ideas when I can, whether in the notes app on my phone or in the black moleskin journal my lovely friend got for my birthday. When you can’t seem to tell anyone else, have a conversation with yourself. Do not judge how you feel. Let it all out. Journaling has a way of releasing all the tension, the worries, the struggles, the hopes, the dreams, all the thoughts that have been coalescing over time and placing it right in front of you. It can be hard to confront what you are feeling or what you want. But there is a weight lifted when you are finally able to face what you may have been neglecting within yourself. I poured through my past journals, cringing over my dramatic middle school, stressing about a single grade or that crush, but it was a time capsule Ioffell today. I rose again. who I was in those moments. I took snippets of quotes that I liked -December 3, 2016 from my journals that I wanted to share. The takeaway is not to suppress emotions or thoughts but to openly digest what’s in your life. Only then can you allow yourself to move forward.

In that moment, I wanted to capture it and show people just how nice he is. But he tells me about this Japanese concept where you have the person you show in public and the person you show to people you trust. I feel lucky to be able to see that side. -August 6, 2016 I just need to start. -July 28, 2016

With people and days like this, I know everything will be okay. -November 23, 2016

I want to grow WITH them, not apart. I hope that’s possible. -August 10, 2016

You must learn to be with it to conquer it. -‐December 10, 2016

I don’t quite remember what I did on this day. Hopefully I’m not forgetting something wonderful. -July 2, 2015

MEET JESSICA QIU

Meet Jessica Qiu, an Ohio born only child

who moved to Texas when she was 9 years old. If you’re lucky enough to stumble upon her walking in passing, odds are you will find her with ear buds in, quietly humming a song as her naturally wavy jetblack hair bounces with the beat. She has one dachshund named Rico who she describes as “a wonderful lazy ball of fluff.” Her “daily doses of doge” never fail to brighten everyone’s day with a good serving of wholesomeness. And this is exactly what Jessica does every day for anyone she encounters, offering her compassionate heart and vibrant energy to strangers and friends alike. She is constantly looking out for others and giving, motivated only by genuine appreciation for the loved ones in her life. Jessica is also very driven, in academics and leadership, always striving to better herself in any way she can. She was the Co-President of Orchestra at both Jasper High School and in the upcoming year at Plano West Senior High School and as a member of Music Above All, an organization that is dedicated to raising money to expand access to musical education throughout the DFW, she demonstrates her involvement in the community and her school in what she loves best: music. Jessica first discovered her love for music at her best friend’s house when she encountered the piano for the first time. “I was absolutely fascinated with the keys and I went home and begged my parents to let me take lessons,” said Jessica. The next day, she went over to her best friend’s house and labeled all the

keys with a sharpie and post-its, already entranced by the magic of music. “I then found out that there was a children’s choir in nearby Columbus and that was around the time that my parents began complaining about my incessant singing,” Jessica said. And Jessica has been singing ever since. Aside from her kindness and ambition, her singing is what she’s known for. She’s got a powerful voice full of emotion and story, but is just as capable of expressing gentle fragility with her soft falsetto. Music plays an integral part of her life and has brought new people into her life that have taught her how to live life to the fullest, from her orchestra family to her wonderful teachers. “It means everything to me because it is such a large part of me. It has made me a more understanding and open minded person,” Jessica said. As mentioned previously, she will be the CoPresident of the Plano West Senior High School Orchestra in the upcoming school year, which she will no doubt lead well as she remains one of the most organized people, a planner at heart. “Being an orchestra president has given me a newfound confidence in my ability to accomplish long term goals. It’s also helped calm my anxiety a little bit by channeling all of my never-ending organizing energy!” Jessica said. As a viola player, Jessica endures the jokes against her instrument but strives to motivate people to involve themselves in music. “It’s a form of catharsis when you can just pick up a viola or sit down at a piano or belt something out from the top of your lungs and channel all the stress or sadness into your art. It leaves you feeling at peace knowing that you’ve given a bit of yourself to the world and that you’ve accomplished something. It’s also just a wonderful way to meet like-minded people and a productive way to spend your free time,” said Jessica If you are one of the lucky ones that she shares her music with, whether in a quiet practice room or at a performance in front of a crowd, you will become quickly enraptured by her honesty and beauty. Although Jessica enjoys a range of music from Classical to Pop, she’s recently been listening to Broadway cast recordings recently. “It’s quite a torrid and emotional love affair as I obviously don’t live close enough to New York to go to shows at the drop of a hate, but I feel there’s something magic about musical theater that is often left unsaid in popular music,” said Jessica. Aside from Broadway music, her favorite artists include Sara Bareilles, Kina Grannis, and dodie

15 clark. Jessica will often listen to Sara Bareilles’ “Winter Song” at 2 am in the morning. “It has this quiet determination to it and coupled with its gentle melody, I think it makes for a beautiful and haunting song,” Jessica said. For Jessica, Kina Grannis is an artist that can transform a pop song that’s been overplayed into an acoustic masterpiece of gold. But dodie has a special place in Jessica’s heart. “dodie, oh, where do I even begin? dodie’s music is what I’m thinking in my head but don’t have the patience or the talent to put to paper and sheet music, “ Jessica said. A recent favorite of Jessica is dodie’s duet with Tom Rosenthal of “Years Years Bears.” Although Jessica is only a senior in High School, she speaks boldly and exemplifies what true kindness means. I have often described her as morning sunlight and warm apple pie, though one thing she hates is the sound of biting into an apple, so do beware. And her friends feel just the same about her as anyone that meets her. “I would say she is one of the most endlessly and genuinely selfless and kind people I know. She is also one of the most hardworking people I’ve ever met and she always steps up when someone needs something done. She’s a leader in the best way and is always there for her friends,” said one of her close friends Yenna. Lauren, another close friend of Jessica, describes her as “someone surprising and with a lot of hidden charms- she’s willing to do as much as she can to help others out but she can also stand on her own.” If you ever have the chance to stumble upon her magic, listen closely because she has something incredibly special to share. This is HerStory.

“It leaves you feeling at peace knowing that you’ve given a bit of yourself to the world and that you’ve accomplished something.”

“It means everything to me because it is such a large part of me. It has made me a more understanding and open minded person.”

HUMAN SUNSHINE

“When they ask you why you love the rain, the ocean, the river, tell them it is because unlike the people who should have loved you better, the water was never afraid to touch you; even when you were at your most damaged and broken.” -Nikita Gill

ADVICE FOR INCOMING SENIORS FROM GRADUATES College essays. Resumés. Grades. GPA. Extracurriculars. Interviews. Socializing. Growing up. Independence. Love. Passions. All of these things are aspects of senior year that can quickly become overwhelming when everyone else seems to have it figured out. Many times throughout the year, I wondered how on earth I was going to get through a week: tests galore and so many things on my mind to match. But what you can always count on, even when it doesn’t seem possible, is that you will always find a way to make it through. But to make it easier, here is some advice from some of my lovely senior friends that I look up to in many ways. I met my friend Charu in my 9th grade French class and we connected over us both being in orchestra. Little did I know that we would grow so close in her final year in high school and that she would always be a highlight at the end of my day in Calculus. Charu is both sensitive but outspoken and truly makes the effort in making sure you know that how you feel is valid. This girl has one of my favorite smiles because it’s as wide as her heart and is only there when she means it. Here’s what she had to say: “Understand what you want from a college when making your decisions and think about how the college will help aid in your path towards your major/career,” Charu said. I think it can be easy to fall into the trap of applying for colleges just for the sake of the name or for pleasing your parents, but in the end, this is your future that you ultimately are investing in, so do the work to find what you truly want. “Visit the colleges you’re thinking about applying to if time permits because the feel of a college really makes a difference,” Charu said. I’ve had the opportunity to visit a few campuses and it really does provide a more personal insight into what the campus is like. Of course, don’t let this be the ultimate deciding factor, because one day doesn’t determine the entirety of what a college can offer. But, take a campus tour. Sit through a class. Talk to a professor. You want to best inform yourself before thinking about applying. “Make your essays personal but not overly sappy. And try to incorporate how your life experiences impacted your choice of major,” Charu said. Essays are a big part of the application and it’s good to start early to avoid the pitfalls of procrastination and overwhelming stress.

This is your chance to show colleges your true voice, something they can’t learn from a resumé or a number. Avoid generic or general statements that they’ve all heard before. What is something that only you can say? And write that. “Don’t let seniorities hit you like crazy – try to keep on top of things even if it feels like a waste of time because your grades still matter. Having a good relation with teachers also helps because they can really help you get through things. Recommendation letters are also important. When asking for rec letters, try to get at least one from a teacher that’s related to your major path. But you don’t want it to be someone you just met, and you also want this teacher to have liked you as a student,” Charu said. Developing good relations with teachers is important not just for the letter, but in furthering how you approach learning as well. Ask questions. Participate. It’s not an easy thing to do. I personally have a fear of sounding dumb towards teachers but they are ultimately there to see you succeed. Also, word of advice. Don’t wait last minute to ask them for a rec letter because it adds stress on them and on you. I put off asking rec letters when applying for summer things but you’ll put yourself and the teacher in the best position by asking early. Do not be afraid! “Do A LOT of research on scholarships your school of choice will offer and if you’re interested in them and do what you need to do in order to meet those requirements. Don’t make the mistake of realizing your scores aren’t high enough or you forgot to apply for those scholarships,” Charu said. You don’t want to miss out on opportunities because of being unprepared so research, research, research! This is your future and you are worth the effort. Charu closes it off with this advice: “Lastly, senior year kinda goes by really fast. So even through all the work and college apps, make time for your friends, family, and most importantly yourself. Don’t drown yourself with too much work. And if you’re stressed, find someone to talk to. Go enjoy your last year of high school.” Charu is such a humble person but she has amazing insight and an even greater heart. I have no doubt that she’ll accomplish great things at college and that she’ll always be close by in my heart.

“Understand what you want.”

28 I met Lydia through a hilarious first meeting of her making a weird sound that I instantly laughed at. Lydia is loud and energetic and someone you instantly feel comfortable with. There is a reason everyone calls her “Mama Lyd” because she is just that: a loving, caring, human that is always seeking to look after others. Even through everything she goes through, she is always there to offer a hug or something to make you laugh. It’s been an honor getting to known her and understand her for more than just the outside. Here’s what she had to say: “For college appliations, try and definitely start planning for which teachers you want rec letters from. DO NOT harass them by any means but usually a good time to ask for them is either when you take your senior pictures (there will be opportunities in the summer) or a week before school that’s because that’s when they’re there, but email beforehand too!” As you can see, taking the initiative to ask for letters in advance is extremely important so plan out who can best talk about you as a student and as a person in general. “In terms of the most important lesson I’ve learned as a senior, it’s okay to prioritize yourself a little more. The first semester is going to be hard for EVERYONE but I think an important thing is to look after yourself and understand yourself and your limits,” Lydia said. This is extremely important advice. When you’re in a very competitive school district, it becomes almost normal to place everything above your wellbeing. All nighters. Coffee. Skipping lunch. But success is all about whether you are enjoying life while still being challenged. That single grade is not worth beating yourself down. Make sure to place yourself as a priority first and you’ll be best able to pursue what you want. Lydia deserves this advice. She’s a wonderful example of how you should treat others and I hope she knows that it’s how she should treat herself. I can’t wait to see what she accomplishes.

“An important thing is to look after yourself and understand yourself and your limits.” The last graduate advice is from Gene. I met Gene when I mistook him for an orchestra kid, but it’s a mistake I’m grateful for. Gene is someone I felt easy to be myself around and he was also easy to have a laugh with. But he’s incredibly intelligent and talented

in what he does and offers great insight into life. Here’s what he had to say: “Realize that things that happen in high school have little importance in and of themselves, but rather teach you important skills like enduring boredom and time management. Focus on the process rather than the results,” Gene said. It’s very easy for things in high school to feel like the end of the world. Every thing has so much weight and importance but things get better and we learn. Although focusing on academics is important, you still want to enjoy your time in high school. Step out of the routine sometimes. Let yourself have fun. Go downstairs and talk to your parents. Take care of yourself and know that you’re doing your best and that’s really all you can ask of yourself. I’m very grateful to have met Gene because he taught me the importance of having a family in friends and the impact of reaching out. He will no doubt continue to do great things and I hope he can find that in his own way. These are just a few pieces of advice from some lovely role models of mine. I am very grateful to have had these people to look up to for advice and guidance and their willingness to share it. As we ultimately become the people that others younger than us look up to, we should strive to be our best selves and pass on that torch to others. Their success is our success. It’s going to be a great year.

“Focus on the process rather than the results.”

BE OPEN TO THE GOOD -e.e.