7 minute read

Why I Love Living Life

Let Your Request Be Made Known

Almost everyone has heard of the Love List. This was made popular more than twenty years ago when people were encouraged to write down the characteristics and traits of their desired love partner. Many participated and were able to boast that the partners they had drawn to themselves precisely matched what was written in their Love Lists. Rather than have you write a new or revised Love List, I do have a question for you. What do you really, really, really, really want from love? I ask because many people believe that what they seek is beyond themselves and is out there somewhere in another person. Sometimes what we really, really want, we already have. So, for this exercise, we will create an abbreviated Love List that will hold only your top fifteen requested attributes in another person.

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In the chart below, identify five each of your favorite characteristics from three categories. They are:

• Physical Characteristics • Personal or Internal Characteristics • Accessories or External Possessions (car, house, shoes, pet, etc.)

After placing them in the chart, identify whether or not they are preferences, conveniences, traditions, or requirements for you and put the corresponding letter next to each characteristic: P, C, T, R.

• Preferences are characteristics you’d prefer that a partner has, but if they don’t happen to have them, you can still be happy. Hairstyles can be examples of preferences. You may prefer short hair, but they have long hair. With all things considered, this may end up being less important than originally thought.

• Conveniences are characteristics that might make life easier with them, but, again, they are not dealbreakers. For instance, you might be hoping for someone who is bilingual, but this new person only

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knows one of the many languages you speak.

• Traditions are characteristics and traits that your partners have had in your relationship history that you do actually prefer. Once examined, you may absolutely insist that they be present, or you may be able to look past them and accept a new trait/characteristic. Skin tone is an example. You may have many in your history with similar skin tones, but a new person may have a very different look. The question is whether or not you are flexible in this arena with all things considered.

• Requirements are absolutely, positively must-have traits and characteristics. There is no flexibility with requirements. They are true dealbreakers. The person could be that millionaire who brings all the excitement to your life that we spoke about earlier, but they also smoke. You cannot stand smoke. Your requirement is that they be a non-smoker. You cannot be involved with this person because your requirements stand—no matter what.

Physical Characteristics Personal/ Internal Characteristics

Accessories/External Possessions P Brown Eyes R Sense of Humor T Gainfully Employed

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Notice where the majority of your requirements are. Are they in the physical characteristics or the personal/internal ones? Sometimes this is determined by age and what the answer to that earlier question of what you really, really, really want is. For those who are already involved, hopefully your requirements are being met in the relationship. If not, there may be a few red lights to address. For those who are open to new relationships starting, be sure that your preferences, conveniences and traditions are not being mistaken for requirements. Many a good person has been looked over and passed up because of things that were either temporary or rather insignificant in the long run. Feel free to make any adjustments to your labels upon further exploration.

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Relationships Respond to Affirmations

As I mentioned in the previous section, many believe they will be changed once love has manifested into their lives. This may be true, but let’s look at some specifics and then combine all of this gathered information into one comprehensive affirmation.

1. What will you have that you don’t have right now once love comes to you/once the love you have improves?

2. How will you feel once love comes to you/once the love you have shifts to a new and improved level?

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3. What will you do differently on a daily basis once love comes into your life/once this shift happens?

Hopefully these questions are engaging your imagination, and you are beginning to see yourself in this space where so much of what you want awaits. Reciting affirmations helps bring what you believe is yours into your life. The following affirmations are designed to increase the love flowing into your life on different levels. The General Love affirmations increase the number of random people who treat you well and offer kindness to you for short spurts of time. This activity counts as love.

General Love Affirmations:

IT IS MY INTENTION TO ENJOY AND WELCOME POSITIVE LOVE FROM WHATEVER DISTANCE, FROM WHATEVER SOURCE, FOR HOWEVER LONG IT LASTS, INTO MY LIFE ON A DAILY BASIS, NOW.

IT IS MY INTENTION TO BE A SOURCE OF LOVE, KINDNESS, AND CARING FOR THOSE IN MY LIFE AND THOSE WHO I MEET TO INCREASE THE FLOW OF LOVE ALL AROUND MY LIFE TODAY AND EVERY DAY, STARTING NOW.

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The True Love affirmation is designed to magnetize your true authentic love, but it must be designed based on your answers to the abbreviated relationship resume and related questions completed on the previous pages. Complete it by filling in the blanks below. Feel free to rewrite your affirmation based on your unique situation.

True Love Affirmation:

IT IS MY INTENTION TO WELCOME TRUE, AUTHENTIC LOVE INTO MY LIFE AND DAILY ROUTINE IN THE FORM OF # _______ NUMBER OF PERSON(S) WHO IS/ARE AVAILABLE, ____________________, COMPATIBLE, __________________, AND ___________________ (use the list from the earlier Love List exercise), WHO I ENJOY AND WHO ENJOY(S) ME AND

WITH WHOM I CAN EASILY GET INTO MY LOVE ZONE, WHO HELP(S) ME FEEL _______________, ________________ AND __________________ WHEN I AM AT ________________ (enter one of your favorite places to be),

ENGAGED IN (enter one of your favorite activities) THAT I AM READY AND ABLE TO ADD TO MY LIFE AND ENJOY ON A DAILY BASIS, STARTING NOW.

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Chart Your Progress

As you continue to speak your affirmations and prepare for a more loving experience, it helps to chart your progress. Even a two-degree shift will change your ultimate destination, so write down the little things that you notice when more and more love starts flowing into your life. I recommend a journal to capture your daily insights and personal revelations. If you’d like a deeper dive into creating and magnetizing love into your life, consider my love coaching program for singles or couples. The work of clearing old habits and experiences is certainly worth it to open the doors of your life to allow you to fall wildly in love. The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step. You have made the first step here. Expect results. Begin to track them here:

I know I am experiencing changes in the amount of love flowing into and through me because of… (please complete this sentence with your own description of your progress)

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The Joy of Falling Wildly In Love

Though many people dream of falling wildly in love with someone they get to have and hold, from this day forward, it is my most humble opinion that the best person to fall wildly in love with is yourself. This definitely was not the most popular practice in years past, but times are changing and more people are beginning to understand how important selfcare and self-love actually are. In order to offer someone else good, wholesome, effective love, you have to be able to administer it to yourself. Choosing to be in love with the life you have been given is the most important decision you can make.

It is an honor and a joy to treat yourself well, and I hope you take every opportunity to be loving and kind to others modeled after the ways you are loving and kind to yourself. Our ideas of what love is and what it should be doing in our lives come from so many places that is would do us all good to practice manufacturing love and distributing it ourselves. The world can be a better place and falling wildly in love is the pathway to reach it.

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