Week 8 - The Student - 2009/2010

Tuesday November 10 2009 | Week 8

Politics over science?

Back to class on cannabis COMMENT

22

» P7

Student marriages Are we bucking the trend?

F E AT U R E S

» P9

S cott ish S t udent Ne wspaper of the Year 2009 S I N C E 1887

T H E U K ' S O LD E S T S T U D EN T N EW S PA P ER

Bans and boycotts to dominate AGM The BNP, Israel and tobacco sales face prohibition from campus

Storming St. Andrews

Edinburgh students protest at the G20 summit, page 3 »

Graduate unemployment: it's not getting any better Jordan Campbell GRADUATE UNEMPLOYMENT has increased by 44 percent in twelve months to its highest rate since 1996, as the effects of economic recession continue to take impact.

The finding comes after a study by the Higher Education Careers Services Unit (HECSU), a charity that supports the work of careers services across the country.

The report found that amongst 2008 graduates, eight percent were still unemployed in January six months later, up three percent from the same study the year earlier.

University of Edinburgh graduates fared slightly better, with 5.5 percent still unemployed, an increase of 1.5 percent from the previous year.

HECSU warn that for those graduating this year, the situation could be much worse as the UK economy shows no immediate signs of coming out of recession.

Recruitment to the construction industry has declined particularly steeply, having been badly affected by the recession. The number of graduate entries is down by six percent, and unemployment for civil engineering graduates has gone up by almost five percent.

The number of graduates entering the banking and financial sector has also fallen, with a decrease of nearly 20 percent for those entering accountancy and investment banking. IT-related work and private sector legal work have also suffered.

Cutting graduate recruitment is one step that many companies have taken to cope with the recession. The Association of Graduate Recruiters (AGR) state that the number of graduate vacancies has decreased by 24.9 percent between 2008 and 2009.

Moreover, the number of applications per vacancy has increased by nearly 18 percent.

Indeed, at careers fairs held at the University of Edinburgh in May and October of this year, both events re-

ported a drop of six percent in the number of companies exhibiting.

Charlie Websper, a third-year student at Edinburgh University attempting to secure work in the financial sector, spoke of the difficulties facing job-seekers at the moment. He said, “the preparation is demanding a lot of research into the companies I am applying for. I know the competition is going to be very high - the whole process can get very stressful."

It seems, however that the public sector is proving to be an exception with the HECSU report indicating significant increases in graduate entrants.

There has been a 55 percent increase in those going into social work, and a 14 percent increase in those going into secondary school teaching.

The future abundance of public sector jobs may be in doubt however, in light of potential public spending cuts after the next general election.

JULIA COBB

Josh King

Commenting on the report, Shelagh Green, director of the Careers Service at the University of Edinburgh told The Student: “Yes, the job market is tough, but there are opportunities out there, and Edinburgh students and graduates are eminently marketable.”

She added that: “Students should take advantage of the support available from the Careers Service to ensure they're well placed to enter and succeed in a competitive job market,” highlighting services on offer such as drop-in sessions for recent graduates struggling in the downturn.

A spokesperson for the CBI, the Confederation of British Industry, commented: “While graduate employment in the short term will be affected by the contraction of the jobs market, in the longer term a degree is still a great investment.” news@studentnewspaper.org

THE STUDENTS' Association’s Annual General Meeting is set to be especially controversial this year, with issues of censorship and prohibition dominating the eight motions on the table.

The motions range from banning the BNP from campus and banning the sale of tobacco in union buildings to reintroducing bibles to every room in Pollock Halls and amending the EUSA constitution to encourage wider participation.

A complete boycott of Israeli academia is also being proposed in the ‘boycott Israel’ motion.

EUSA President Thomas Graham told The Student that “the focus on banning or unbanning or boycotting things is a little disappointing,” expressing his desire to see more positive ideas that would take the association forward.

He did stress though that the motions were brought forward by the student body, and are for all students to decide on.

The Student also spoke with Stephen Allison, who brought forward the ‘Pollock Bibles’ motion.

“Four years ago the SRC voted to prevent the placing of Bibles in Pollock Halls,” he said.

“What shocks me about this decision is that they did it to apparently prompt religious diversity - how can you prompt religious diversity by censoring religious ideas?

“Our motion is about the freedom of people to distribute any book in Pollock.”

When questioned on the issue of free speech in relation to gagging the BNP, he responded by saying that, “censoring free speech...does not trust students enough.”

“If we are going to censor someone because they disagree with the collective morals of the majority then freedom of speech becomes meaningless and we might as well abolish Continued on page 2 »

Tuesday November 10 2009 studentnewspaper.org

news@studentnewspaper.org

2

What’s in this issue NEWS »p1-5

»

EUSA AGM promises to be controversial

HASH IN THE ATTIC p4

Fiona Cuddihy reports on Scotland's homegrown cannabis boom

PISSING CARNAGE p5

Student events brand in trouble following Philip Laing's public urination

COMMENT »p6-7 POLITICAL PLATFORMS p14 Dante Mazzari argues against the 'No Platforms' motion

FIVE STAR BEDLAM p12

Helen Harjak reckons Robin Hellier and co get it spot on in their production of Martin McDonagh's The Pillowman

CARNIE OR VEGGIE? p14

Joseph James Sherwen tastes both sides of Edinburgh

BAH BLOODY HUMBUG p16

Would Dickens be turning in his grave at the latest adaptation of his Christmas classic?

WHAT A NUTTER p19

David Nutt tells us what's playing on his iPod

ETCH A SKETCH 2009 p21

Alan Williamson checks out the DS's latest creation

SPORT »p23-24 DO WE STAND ANY CHANCE? p23

Michael Mawdsley looks at the home nations' credentials ahead of the autumn internationals

RAISE YOUR HAND IF YOU LIKE...PIZZA: Students vote at last year's AGM Continued from front page...

the whole concept.”

Graham rejected claims that the two motions were contradictory, saying that “the No Platform motion isn’t a question of free speech – this is misleading – it’s just a question of would you have the BNP or a fascist group in your living room - do we as a student association want to collectively let them in?

“These kinds of policies show how important it is to encourage people from all backgrounds to come along.”

The boycott Israel motion is likely to be controversial, after last year’s occupation of the George Square lecture theatre by pro-Palestinian activists divided opinion on campus. The occupation ended with the University acceding to several of the protesters’ demands for reviews into links with Israel.

The strongly-worded motion calls for ‘a comprehensive boycott of Israeli institutions at the national and inter-

The Student Newspaper | 60 Pleasance, Edinburgh, EH8 9TJ Email: editors@studentnewspaper.org

national levels’ and ‘to refrain from participation in any form of academic and cultural cooperation, collaboration with Israeli institutions.’

EUSA’s Vice President for Services, James Wallace, has also said that the motion to ban the sale of tobacco products in union buildings could cost EUSA £250,000 in revenue, £150,000 in direct cigarette sales and at least £100,000 in other purchases.

Speaking to The Student, he said: "This motion is the most controversial proposed at an AGM in a number of years. This debate is not about money.

The question that must be asked is should such intellectually informed adults be made to stop buying a legal product because some students don't agree with their choice? We as a student body should discourage smoking but not impose our values under the guise of helping those students who make an informed choice.

"It is shocking and fundamentally wrong to suggest that EUSA is ‘promoting and helping facilitate

premature death sickness, misery and disease’, that is like saying that all car companies cause death on roads and that Thomas Graham is killing innocent civilians in Iraq because he has voted Labour at the last election.”

Students will also have the opportunity to vote to improve energy efficiency in flats, change the rules to keep the KB bar license and reduce EUSA’s reliance on internal flights.

The Association hopes to achieve a quorate attendance of at least 300 students this year, something it has repeatedly failed to do in the past. Free taxis will be provided from Pollock Halls and as a further incentive, anybody who stays for the whole meeting will receive a stamped society card and a free drinks voucher.

The EUSA AGM will take place at George Square lecture theatre on Tuesday November 17 between 7pm and 9pm. news@studentnewspaper.org

UNESCO to award chair in international development Katie Cunningham

"Tasty!"

JULIA SANCHES

ARTS&FEATURES »p9-21

UNESCO HAS announced a decision to give the University of Edinburgh a chair in International Development following the university’s publication of initiatives designed to help the developing world and improve international understanding.

UNESCO, the United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organisation, aims to help promote international co-operation and cultural sharing amongst UN member states.

Edinburgh’s initiatives are attempts to further the goal of UNESCO in communication, health and education.

The first initiative is a Teaching Collaboration on food availability in poor regions, consisting of a two-day workshop, and future plans for further collaboration between thirteen

highly-ranked and international universities.

The university will also create a Global Health Academy looking at international health concerns, ranging from obesity to pandemic flu, including swine flu, and tropical diseases like malaria.

This would be first of several proposed Global Academies; plans exist to set up similar climate change and international development groups.

The third initiative is a new scholarship programme to fund Tanzanian students.

Named after Julius Nyerere, the first Tanzanian President and Edinburgh graduate, it aims to encourage international attendance.

By awarding the chair to the university, UNESCO reward Edinburgh’s highly valued research into international development, and hope to encourage future work.

The first Chair Holder is Paul van Gardingen, Professor of International Development at the university.

Having promoted scientific and cultural collaboration throughout his career, he is pleased at the recognition and opportunities granted to the university.

“The University of Edinburgh has been an International institution from its inception,” said Professor van Gardingen.

He also stated that the award shows the “impact our research can have in improving the lives of people in some of the world’s most impoverished places.”

The Chair gives the University of Edinburgh a greater international presence, and it is hoped, will be important in continuing to expand Britain’s place in the UN. news@studentnewspaper.org

Tuesday November 10 2009 studentnewspaper.org

news@studentnewspaper.org

News 3

Students unite to lobby G20 finance ministers

POLITE PROTESTERS: They said it, not us Julia Cobb EDINBURGH STUDENTS voiced their displeasure with the Group of Twenty finance ministers at a protest in St. Andrews on Saturday. Several University of Edinburgh student groups, including People and Planet and Amnesty International, joined a march of about 300 people from the beach to the town center.

The Group of Twenty, an organisa-

tion of the world’s richest countries, comprises 85 percent of the global gross national product and 80 percent of the world’s trade. Finance ministers met on Friday and Saturday to discuss how economic growth should be regulated and encouraged as the world emerges from the current global recession. The leaders were also set to discuss climate change, ahead of the major global summit occurring in Copenhagen in December. The meet-

ing in St. Andrews was hosted by British Treasury Chief Alistair Darling.

The march was organised by Put People First and attended by representatives from Oxfam, War on Want and SCIAF, among others. Put People First also hosted an alternative conference in St. Andrews, which featured speakers on peace, justice and the environment.

Student organisers hoped that their presence might remind the G20 leaders of what is really at stake in regards to climate change and the financial future of the globe.

“It’s really important that we have a presence with people from all over Scotland and the UK, especially since Copenhagen is coming up. We have to do as much as we can,” says third-year Edinburgh GeoScience student Stephi Walker.

“People are resigned to the way the world is - but the only way the world will stay this way is if you keep saying that this is the way things are,” Walker added, “we have to remind them that people care - it’s the democratic process!”

These feelings were echoed by Richard Atkinson, a first-year German and English Literature student who attended the rally with People and Planet: “I want G20 Finance to understand the link between finance and climate change; this is one of our last chances to sort it out.”

Some members of People and Planet’s University of Edinburgh chapter cycled from Edinburgh to St. Andrews for Saturday’s protests, in an effort to make their protest carbon neutral.

Daniel Abrahams, the co-convener

for People and Planet, says that cycling was particularly important where recent financial bailouts are considered.

“They’re talking about bailing out RBS even more, when we all know that RBS invests in oil production - our money is going toward creating climate chaos! G20 leaders aren’t doing a frac-

“

We cannot afford to go on as we are now, or our children will inherit a catastrophe that will make our generation look hell-bent on destruction!"

Ian Galloway, Society Council of the Church of Scotland

tion of what they should.”

Several speakers, including Ian Galloway of the Society Council of the Church of Scotland and David Moxham, the deputy general secretary of the Scottish TUC, helped rally the crowd gathered on the beach before the march.

“There are times to be comfortable. Now is not that time,” Galloway reminded the crowd, to cheers and applause. “Across the world people live in fear of what the future has in store. We cannot afford to go on as we are now, or our children will inherit a catastrophe that will make our generation look

hell-bent on destruction!”

Moxham gave a succinct summary of the aims of the various groups attending the protests: “We know the answers aren’t easy, but the starting point is easy. Put people first: crack down on banks, build a low carbon economy with green jobs and decent services. Don’t just say you’re going to do it. Say what you’ll spend and when you’ll do it.”

Protesters marched from the beach to the St. Andrews University student union, waving banners and holding placards, some of which read "G20: Don’t rob us of our future".

Altercations between police and protesters were minimal throughout the day, though some protesters took umbrage at policemen along the route of the march who were filming the rally with handheld video cameras. When confronted, police assured protesters that the footage would only be used for "crime prevention purposes" and that, were no crimes committed during the protest, the footage would be destroyed within 30 days.

Mark Laing, the police press officer for Fife, said police expected a peaceful day: “Everyone that’s here is in a nice happy mood. They’re a good-natured bunch, and you can’t help but agree with what they’re saying!”

Later in the afternoon, a smaller group of protesters, shouting slogans like "They say cut back, we say fight back" attempted to the reach the hotel where the G20 meeting was being held, but were corralled by police. news@studentnewspaper.org

'Big Switch' turns Pollock Halls green POLLOCK HALLS residents will soon have the opportunity to reduce their carbon footprint without even leaving their flat.

Transition Edinburgh University (TEU), a collaborative initiative between students and staff is organising ‘Big Switch’ at Pollock Halls, and hopes to expand its programmes into self-catered university housing in the new year.

TEU aims to tackle climate change and peak oil through "practical action research projects".

Big Switch, which kicked off last week with the launch of an inter-house energy saving competition aims, according to Sion Lanini, programme organiser for TEU, to “make action around big issues such as climate personable, rewarding and fun!”

According to Lanini, over 330 students at Pollock have filled out carbon footprint surveys, which included questions about travel and food consumption. TEU is hosting a fruit tree planting this Wednesday at Pollock and has invited students to get their hands dirty and help out.

“The main focus of the competition will be the small things that we can all do to lessen our impact, with lots of opportunities to have fun at the same time,” says Lanini.

The initiative uses a model of grass-roots action to raise awareness and, they hope, make a difference to the environment.

Lanini adds that TEU’s reasons

MASSIVE POLLOCKS: Transition Edinburgh launch bold moves in University accommodation for choosing Pollock Halls as a starting point are simple: “Guilt is often used as a strategy to persuade people to change their behaviour, but this often causes resentment, opens up a misperceived gap between people 'who care' and 'don't care' and disempowers people to come up with their own creative solutions. Action to raise awareness and tackle environmental problems

seems to be focusing more and more on community-led solutions, which is what we're attempting to do by focusing action on the actual campus of Pollock Halls. These communityled initiatives are really important because they provide many other social, health and economic benefits and attract a more diverse range of people than 'the usual suspects'.”

Besides TEU’s environmental

goals, organisers say they believe that student-staff collaboration is paramount. Sandra Kinneai, an accommodation manager and environmental sustainability liaison for the University says that initiatives like Big Switch are about “peer to peer learning”.

“This isn’t about ordering people around from the top down; it’s much more effective if students are teach-

MANIACYAK, WWW.FLICKR.COM

Julia Cobb

ing students.”

Besides, Kinneai adds, “Changing together is more effective and more fun.”

TEU is supported by both the University of Edinburgh’s branch of People and Planet and the University Energy and Sustainability Office. news@studentnewspaper.org

Tuesday November 10 2009 studentnewspaper.org

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news@studentnewspaper.org

News

Cannabis ten times more profitable than Scotland's famous raspberries AN ESTIMATED £100 million of Cannabis is grown in Scotland every year, according to investigations carried out by Strathclyde Police.

This figure means that cannabis is thought to be ten times more profitable than the humble Scottish raspberry, and by some estimates, more profitable than the entire Scottish vegetable crop.

Cannabis farms are usually disguised in the unlikely setting of Scottish suburbia. Edinburgh’s Cramond area, Alloway (once home to the poet Robert Burns) and Anniesland, in Glasgow, have seen multiple Cannabis raids.

Most of the properties are rented, and landlords have been told to be extra-vigilant of their tenants in future.

Forensic scientists, who have been analysing cannabis, state that the imported cannabis resin that was popular twenty years ago, has been pushed aside by the now dominant 'skunk' variety, which can be up to five times stronger than resin and can be grown in your own home.

According to the BBC Scotland programme, ‘Hash in the Attic’, to grow cannabis in Scotland you need a heating, cooling and irrigation system which can be constructed with everyday gardening and electrical equipment.

It costs around £3,000 to make

FLICKR: WET WATER & DEMONE

Fiona Cuddihy

LET ME HASHK YOU THIS: Which one are you more likely to find in your local Scotmid? a business out of it and this hive of industry usually goes unnoticed by neighbours.

However, due to the sometimes botched DIY wiring, fires can break out, which has caused thousands of pounds worth of damage to properties and alerted police to the whereabouts of cannabis cultivators.

Detective Superintendent Alan Buchanan of Strathclyde Police has warned that the rise in profit in cannabis production is linked to organised crime. He states that behind the ‘hippy veneer’ of weed smoking, there is murder, prostitution and corruption fuelling the industry.

Featured in ‘Hash in the Attic’, a

former weed grower Kaya RussellWhittaker, described how in the beginning it had felt like an “adventure”, learning about growing the crops.

She made £170,000 in one year but said that she quickly got wrapped up into a world of “cynical dealers” who would do anything

to make a profit, and was relieved when she was caught by the police and could start a new life. news@studentnewspaper.org

Early UCAS applications Mandelson: Universities should at record high be consumer-orientated

UCAS HAVE released figures showing a twelve percent rise in early applications to university this year.

Over 71,000 applications have already been received by UCAS, up from 64,000 this time last year.

The figures largely reflect applications for places on vocational science courses such as medicine and veterinary medicine, and for Oxford and Cambridge, which are subject to an earlier deadline.

Applications to institutions in Scotland saw a lower rise than those in England and Wales, though there was still an increase of 5.5 percent.

UCAS’ acting chief executive Virginia Isaac said it was too early to tell whether the significant increase in applicants would be sustained throughout the process.

"It does indicate, however, that in certain areas, once again, prospective students will be facing strong competition for places," she said.

Paul Marshall, the executive director of the 1994 Group of research-intensive universities, said the rise was proof that universities' efforts to encourage participation in higher education were working well.

"1994 Group universities want to help meet this healthy demand but we must all recognise the financial pressures universities are under to

maintain the quality of student experience," he said.

"Any further expansion must be fully funded so that universities can continue to develop the very best graduates and offer a world class academic experience in a research rich environment."

“

Far more potential students than usual have been left without a place" David Willetts, Shadow Universities and Skills Secretary

The shadow universities and skills secretary, David Willetts, believes that "ministers are sleepwalking into another university entrance crisis.

"This year, far more potential students than usual have been left without a place and we can now see the problems are set to be even worse next year.

"It was obvious from the demographics and the state of the economy that more people would aspire to go to university.

"Ministers failed to tackle the issue in 2009 and are now repeating their mistakes for 2010." news@studentnewspaper.org

MR BURNS: Just what is Peter Mandelson plotting?

Guy Rughani LORD MANDELSON of the Department for Business, Innovation and Skills has announced new measures to overhaul higher education in the UK, making universities more ‘business like.’

Mandelson wants students and

parents to be consumers, with universities responding far more to feedback and developing courses more relevant to the employment environment.

He also suggested that businesses should get involved with course design, saying that: “Universities are not islands, they are not ivory towers, they have to respond to the world around them.”

WORLD ECONOMIC FORUM, WWW.FLICKR.COM

Josh King

Teaching quality and graduate employment rates will need to be much more widely publicised. Similarly, information about contact time, group sizes and dropout rates will appear on a new food label-style rating system, designed to make choosing the best course much easier.

Speaking on BBC Radio 4’s Today programme, the business secretary said: “It's very important that universities must give much fuller information about the type and quality of teaching and how much direct contact with teachers they will have…and what outcomes there have been."

It is likely that over the next few years universities who provide ‘contextual data’ about student ethnicity, parental background and school type will receive significant government backing, as they comply with government plans to increase social mobility.

As well as being more receptive to businesses and students, universities will be expected to offer more webbased degrees, allowing greater studying flexibility.

Mandelson’s statement comes just before the announcement of a tuition fee review which will report its findings after the next general election, a move which has been criticised by the National Union of Students. news@studentnewspaper.org

Tuesday November 10 2009 studentnewspaper.org

news@studentnewspaper.org

News 5

Anna MacSwan

A STUDENT from Sheffield Hallam University faces the possibility of a jail sentence for urinating on a war memorial whilst on a bar crawl organised by Carnage UK. Provoking national outrage, the incident has brought the company and its controversial events under renewed criticism.

Philip Laing, a first-year sports technology student, appeared at a court hearing this week after having been caught on camera relieving himself on a wreath of poppies at a First World War Memorial in Sheffield’s city centre.

Laing’s actions have been criticised as highly disrespectful by many, with Facebook groups entitled ‘Jail Philip Laing’ and ‘Philip Laing – drunken moron’ attracting thousands of members.

Issuing an apology through Sheffield Hallam University, Laing said: "I have no recollection of the events in the photograph, although I recognise that this does not excuse my actions.”

District Judge Anthony Browne said that all sentencing options for his offence remained open, including a jail term. He also suggested that Carnage UK bore responsibility, saying that “Carnage is the name of the organisation who promote this type of activity and some might say that somebody should be standing alongside you this morning."

Carnage UK, run by Varsity Leisure Group Ltd., currently hosts events in around 45 towns and cities across the UK. Students typically pay in the region of £10 for entry into various bars and clubs with cheap drinks promotions.

“

Carnage is the name of the organisation who promote this type of activity and some might say that they should be standing here alongside you this morning" District Judge Anthony Browne

The National Union of Students have launched a campaign to prevent the organisation from holding events in the future, with Vicepresident Richard Budden saying “There is an acute and real danger to students who get caught up with these nights, not to mention the danger to members of the local population, and the harm done to town and gown community relationships.

"An increasing number of campuses want to see the end of these events and are doing all they can to

The Library Bar Christmas

stop them by prohibiting ticket sales and banning all publicity.

"They take students on pub crawls that degrade the participants, put students' welfare at risk and lead to antisocial behaviour. They make their money and then disappear, leaving student unions, police, and sometimes even the hospitals to pick up the pieces."

Student unions in Bath, Lincoln, Swansea and York, where Carnage nights are scheduled to take place, have made moves to disrupt the event, threatening to withdraw endorsement from participating venues.

There have long been reservations surrounding such ‘binge tours’.

In 2008, members of the Coalition Against Raising the Drinking Age in Scotland called for the Scottish Government to take action to prevent organisers such as Carnage from running events.

According to a poll by The Observer, at least 17 student unions already prohibit Carnage from advertising in their venues, EUSA included.

Carnage UK denies claims that it encourages irresponsible drinking, with a spokesperson saying: “Varsity Leisure Group does not promote the commission of criminal offences. It is highly defamatory to suggest that it does.” news@studentnewspaper.org

2009

The year is nearly at an end and Christmas is around the

corner.

What

better

way

to

celebrate

than

organise a Christmas meal with your friends and/or work

colleges

in

the

Library

Bar

at

Teviot

Row

House, Edinburgh. An exciting party atmosphere is awaiting you throughout December, festive food with all

the

trimmings,

Christmas

crackers,

tunes

and

decorations, all for a great price!

Our bar is well stocked up for Christmas with a wide range of wines, beers and soft drinks - not forgetting our Library Cocktails!

Feel free to take a look at our

wine menu and pre order for your meal…

Throughout November and December check out our fantastic drink and beverage selection in the Library

catered

for

Roast parsnip soup with rosemary and crème fraiche Poached salmon and prawn terrine served on a bed of rocket salad, light lemon and dill cream

Roasted pepper, aubergine and goat cheese parfait

Mains

All served with Chef selection of Seasonal Vegetables & Roast Potatoes -

Roast Lothian turkey with all the trimmings Roast honey and balsamic glazed ham Chestnut roast

served with a brandy Sauce

Mango and coconut creme brulee cheese cake served with fresh cream

Space will be limited to smaller groups in the Library and sub rooms. be

Starters

Traditional Christmas pudding

You can book a table for between Monday to Saturday, 12:30 pm and 7:00 pm Sundays, 12:30 pm - 5:30 pm 25th November to 18th December 2009

maybe

on booking please choose one from each course

Dessert

Visit our reception or send an enquiry to teviot.reception@eusa.ed.ac.uk for a booking form.

bookings

Christmas Four Course Menu

topped with yellow courgettes, artichoke hearts and asparagus spears

Bar at fantastic festive prices.

Large

Will any of these people later wee in the street?

in

Teviot’s

many

function

rooms. All bookings will require a £50 refundable deposit and we will also ask you for your groups menu options on booking so we can ensure you get the very best quality and service.

Book for over fifteen people and the organiser eats for free....!

Double chocolate mousse Coffee

and mini mince pies £15.00 per head

ALBANPICS

'Binge tours' face backlash as student may be jailed over war memorial incident

Tuesday November 10 2009 studentnewspaper.org

6

comment@studentnewspaper.org

Comment

Comment

No platform, no questions Dante Mazzari warns the 'no platform' motion could silence student societies indefinitely

W

ith this month’s coming EUSA Annual General Meeting (AGM) finally expected to make quorum, and a number of high profile motions on the table, the future EUSA constitution is very likely to be a major source of controversy. However, the proposed ‘No Platform’ motion, known informally – and somewhat misleadingly – as ‘Ban the BNP’, is in danger of going to the AGM with almost no discussion beforehand. To my knowledge, no sitting President of the Edinburgh University Politics Society has ever publicly taken a stand on a specific EUSA issue; however, the potential damage this motion could cause to any society which regularly hosts speaking events mandates that I make sure this discussion begins and that I take a firm stand against the motion.

For those who have not read the ‘No Platform’ motion, I suggest that you do so and judge it on its own merits. The premise seems innocuous enough (cloaked, of course, as opposition to the BNP) but the devil, as always, is in the details. In effect, there are two debates here: first, the debate over whether or not extreme groups, such as the BNP, should be allowed to express their views on campus; and second, what the full ramifications of this motion will be and whether they will serve only their intended purpose. On the first point, it will suffice for me to say that I personally strongly believe that freedom of speech should be inalienable

and absolute. I am proud to be President of a society which has, at its core, a fundamental belief that fulfilment of democracy and the betterment of humanity is best served through unencumbered free discussion. I do not believe the students of Edinburgh University need to be censored by anyone, much less their own union. Beyond that, it is a philosophical point which is best left to the conscience of the individual.

In the interests of space I will only highlight those aspects of this document which I consider to be the most dangerous (a fully annotated copy of the document will also be made available at our website).

The teeth of the motion is summed up by resolves (1.) and (3.) which authorise EUSA to disenfranchise societies which host speakers whom the Students’ Representative Council (SRC) ‘identif[ies]…as holding racist or fascist views.’ Resolution (2b.) furthermore authorises the SRC to blacklist individuals or groups who, in its judgement, have violated the motion and Resolves (4a.) and (4b.) mandate that any time an individual or group so identified by the SRC speaks anywhere in the city of Edinburgh, EUSA is required to both organise a protest (presumably at its own expense) and to ‘co-ordinate with the police’. Note both that this is an unwarranted extension of EUSA’s jurisdiction beyond the university campus (which is of dubious legality) and that EUSA is not required to notify the

accused individual or group before alerting police to any alleged threat they may or may not pose.

This is clearly an enormous concentration of coercive power in the hands of the SRC. It is less clear under what criteria this power may be exercised. No criteria are ever explicitly given; in fact, Notes (2.) makes reference to ‘groups and individuals who incite hatred on the previously stated grounds’ despite no such grounds appearing anywhere in the document. If I had to guess, these ‘grounds’ probably implicitly refer to EUSA’s ubiquitous commitment to equality ‘regardless of race, nationality, creed, disability, gender, age, sexual orientation or HIV status’. The phrase emerges several times in the document, and while perhaps applicable to membership criteria, when it comes to speakers, is as slippery and opaque as the phrase ‘fascist or racist’. This overall ambiguity leaves the SRC an enormous amount of potential discretion, which is worrying when coupled with the new powers they are afforded under this motion.

Consider the following scenarios: (a.) a religious-affiliated society hosts a theologian whose views are not in keeping with EUSA’s; (b.) a campaigning group sponsors a boycott or protest against a particular ideology or creed which they oppose. In both of these scenarios, the societies in question could theoretically be disbarred forever by the SRC. For that matter, a particular po-

litical party could theoretically submit to the SRC a motion to the effect that all opposing parties are ‘fascist’ and have them forever disenfranchised. The motion does not lay out any requisites, so all this would require would be a simple majority in the SRC. Bear in mind, of course, that the SRC has no chamber of appeals, no oversight

“

A particular political party could theoretically submit to the SRC a motion to the effect that all opposing parties are 'fascist' and have them forever disenfranchised." board, no mechanism for neutral enquiry.

Rather, all decisions are taken by simple majority after which they are considered final and forevermore. Moreover, the language of Resolves (1.), (2.), and (4.) can be interpreted to hold societies collectively responsible for their individual members, even such that their ‘implied’ views may be taken into account, as in article (5.).

Bible bashing

Stuart Ritchie says no to a Bible in every Pollock room

I

n the beginning, there was a Bible in every bedroom in Pollock, a gift from the Gideons. But in 2005, those nasty old secularists in the SRC had the highly sensible idea of barring such sectarian literature from being placed in halls. Somewhat predictably, this caused considerable wailing and gnashing of teeth in the Christian Union (CU), who tried, and failed, to repeal this decision at a EUSA AGM in 2006. That should have been the end of the matter, but history, I am afraid, is repeating itself.

The latest in the seemingly eternal game of religious whack-a-mole comes next Tuesday evening, as the CU table its latest motion, begging for permission to put their holy book back into your bedroom. What does their motion (available on the EUSA website) say? Apparently, many students ‘…have taken comfort in a Bible passage in times of distress…’ so it is exceptionally important for them to have access to a Bible at all times.

Greater hubris hath no society than this. Even leaving aside the fact that this is the 21st Century, and every single version of the Bible is available in full for free on the internet (I should be God’s PR man), the notion of a Bible in every room is groan-inducingly archaic. Edinburgh students have access to several excellent

advice facilities such as Nightline or the University’s own counselling service, and I cannot imagine why anyone would not choose them over an ancient text which has arguably lost any real pertinence.

“

Here, secularism is the only way to protect diversity. Privilege no-one - then everyone’s rights are protected."

Indeed, if the CU is so concerned about the well-being and comfort of their fellow students, one would think they would be frantically advertising the University’s counselling services, since they offer all-encompassing and inclusive support, regardless of beliefs.

After all, we would want people to be at their most composed and rational before they start thinking of big concepts such as whether God exists, would we not?

In their motion, the CU throws a

sop to the notion of diversity by saying ‘any group or society representing any particular point of view who wish to provide literature to be placed in every room in Pollock should be allowed to do so...’. While the image of rooms stuffed with precarious piles of books from Mein Kampf to The Da Vinci Code is highly amusing, the CU’s argument is plainly disingenuous. It knows very well that it is one of the biggest groups on campus, and no other society can possibly come close to affording books for every room. So we end up with the opposite of diversity: one group monopolising unfairly.

Here, secularism is the only way to protect diversity. Privilege no-one, then everyone’s rights are protected.

You may of course be thinking ‘what’s the big deal? A Bible in a drawer is hardly going to cause anyone any serious anguish, and Pollock students need to get their roach papers from somewhere.’ This misses the greater point, however. We live in a society which is highly tolerant of all religions; one group should not be allowed to invade peoples’ private space.

The CU would dearly love to be a law unto themselves, but they must not be given special dispensation to trample over the rights of everyone else.

So at Tuesday’s AGM, consider the

ways, and be wise. The only way to respect diversity, tolerance, and freedom of choice is to vote against the CU’s griping, wornout motion. This is one time when we should definitely not turn the other cheek.

The incredible folly of this motion is summed up in Believes (7.) which states that ‘Those organisations who provide a platform to these speakers could be seen to be endorsing those views.’ For the Politics Society, this means that our statement of political neutrality, at the core of our constitution, can be suddenly rendered meaningless by a simple EUSA motion. In that case, presumably, each member of the committee could be associated with the views of all of our speakers, meaning in the eyes of EUSA we support every major political party at once, and think that Britain should be both in and out of the EU and, for example, believe that Abdelbaset al-Megrahi, like Schrödinger’s cat, is simultaneously guilty and innocent of the Lockerbie bombing.

This is clearly a confused, ill-conceived and potentially dangerous document.

The duty of the students and societies of Edinburgh University should not be merely to vote down this appalling motion, but to vote against it by such a margin that it makes resoundingly clear we will no longer tolerate such unprofessional, destructive, and self-aggrandising drivel, especially when there are more constructive and useful motions on the table.

Dante Mazzari is the President of the University of Edinburgh Politics society

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Tuesday November 10 2009 studentnewspaper.org

Comment 7

Dopey decision

Jack Serle protests against the sacrifice of science for a political agenda

T

he Advisory Council on the Misuse of Drugs (ACMD) was formed in 1971 by the act of parliament that instituted the ABC class system for illegal drugs, and the sentencing guidelines to go with them.

The ACMD provides the Home Office with considered advice compiled and presented by experts in pertinent fields after the analyses of all relevant data and debates. It was chaired by Professor David Nutt, holder of the Edmond J Safra chair in Neuropsychopharmacology at Imperial College London; a well respected scientist and presumably a highly intelligent man.

Ignoring the advice of such a body would be either well justified or just ignorant. Step up, Home Secretary Alan Johnson. He is the second Home Secretary of this Government to go against the advice of the ACMD. The first was Jacqui Smith – these two are the only two to reject the Council’s recommendations. Professor Nutt has been forced to resign, why exactly is not certain but it is becoming clear that Professor Nutt lost his unpaid position for holding opinions contrary to government policy.

The row stems from Professor Nutt’s recent lecture to the King's College, London, Centre for Crime and Justice Studies. He stated cannabis to be no more harmful to public health than alcohol and cigarettes. He said this to

highlight the need for all harmful substances, not just illegal substances, to be accounted for in investigations for comparisons sake. Note public health – this is not to pre-empt research into the link between cannabis and psychological and neurological disorders.

It is a reference to the fact that alcohol and tobacco kill and hospitalise people in great numbers every year. It points to the data showing that many people have been hospitalized or killed through second hand smoke or someone else’s actions whilst intoxicated with alcohol. This is to the detriment of public health.

“

Policy in this country has been wrong since the concept of banning substances first appeared" Illegal drugs impact enormously on public health, costing lives and money each year. Professor Nutt’s point acknowledges the simple fact that drug policy in this country has been wrong since the concept of banning substances first appeared. Somehow we have reached a stage where we are

at war on drugs; in South America and Afghanistan this is no hyperbolic turn of phrase. Rather than fighting drugs, we should be fighting the reasons people turn to them in the first place.

Professor Nutt’s outspoken display, contradicting policy and undermining the government, was described by the Home Secretary as a bid to lobby for a policy change; that he was using the lecture and his position as chair of the ACMD to sway public opinion away from the government’s agenda. Yet Professor Nutt in no way broke the government’s own rules for independent advisors pursuing academic study and publication.

He was speaking as the holder of the Edmond J Safra Chair at Imperial, not chairman of the ACMD – a distinction the government’s guidelines draw as permissible. In fact, the Professor is obliged to educate the public on his research fully to meet his moral duties as an expert scientist.

This is clearly a politically motivated action. It flies in the face of scientific opinion and research and underscores the hypocrisy of the divide between

legal and illegal intoxicants.

For the Home Secretary to ignore the advice of a specific body requires justification. It was a political decision and if the ACMD is just a pliable committee to okay whatever the government wants, with a scientific seal of approval, then Alan Johnson has a lot to answer for. It spits on the principle that the scientific agenda in this country is set and driven by peer-reviewed investigation and rigorous debate. It is not in the public interest for legislation to be based on scientific enquiry only when the science fits the

public opinion not public interest. He has added to the distortion of scientific principles by sidelining informed debate in a bid to have a rubber stamp to bash all over government policy.

Clearly a decision was been made for all the wrong reasons. Cannabis’ reclassification is immaterial. How long you get in prison for selling or smoking the stuff is another argument. The decision to publicly abrade the image of scientific research and, thereby, government decision-making by firing David Nutt is shocking.

bill.

Essentially, by Alan Johnson ignoring Professor Nutt’s advice then firing him on spurious grounds, it has once again been shown that we are governed by

Sisters are doing it to themselves Kamila Kocialkowska argues that when it comes to politics women are their own worst enemies

A

re women taken seriously in politics yet? Not if Silvio Berlusconi has anything to do with it, perhaps, but you’d assume that in the vastly more politically correct culture of the British Isles, we’d have gained some irrevocable equality by now. However, there have been a surprising amount of complaints of sexism in our political spheres this year. Back in June Caroline Flint famously resigned as Europe Minister with the crippling remark that Gordon Brown and Co. treat women in the government as mere ‘window dressing’. This accusation of closeted misogyny was helped when Harriet Harman faced uncensored ridicule for what Rod Liddle described as ‘reductive, bone-headed, conservative feminism’. He proceeded to sum up her considerable achievements in The Spectator, in an article which opened with the carefully considered question, ‘So, Harriet Harman… would you?’

The latest enraged feminist is Tanya Gold, who published a Guardian column with a fairly furious rant about the way ‘our political culture trivializes women’.

Her article details many examples of the ways society ‘encourages the physical objectification of female politicians’. Her evidence to support these claims consists of a list of recent headline-grabbing articles about the sartorial decisions of female politicians.

She has a point; there has been an on-going and in-depth debate over Sarah Brown and Samantha Cameron’s outfit choices, (high street or designer?) Also fair

amounts of press attention related to Liz Truss’s gold jacket, Theresa May’s leopard print shoes, and Ann Widdecombe’s hair, seem to provide Gold with irrefutable facts that we refuse to take women in politics seriously. She concludes that ‘in politics, the condition of femininity itself remains a story and a distraction’. While men are judged on their political actions and policies, women cannot escape wardrobe scrutiny; presumably evidence that, in terms of gender equality, society has not really progressed since the fifties.

Though she admits ‘there is no one enemy in this’, the subtle implication lurking behind the article is that there is; men and their misogynistic ways and demeaning attitudes. There is a fairly major flaw in this argument; the only people who actually care about Samantha Cameron’s shoes, are women. The only people who ever read, write, think or care about whether her dress is from Marks & Spencer, are women. Obsession with how our female politicians look, then, is not sexist. It is symptomatic of our craving of celebrity culture, and is a primarily female phenomena.

When Samantha donned her Zara heels for the Conservative Party Conference, she presumably anticipated that they would rack up some fashion column inches. But I’m sure she was far less concerned

about the ogling male gaze which may objectify her, than the vindictive female gaze which would digest her every style decision and post internet blogs about its relative failings.

Admittedly, if you read the Daily Mail, or a paper of similar quality, femiMail nist stances on women in positions of power may not b e

as ubiquitous as one would hope. But since when does this automatically negate all the serious political analysis which still exists in abundance? Gold’s rant seems bizarrely misplaced in our particular political climate. All-female shortlists, anyone? The greatest influx of women into parliament in British history? Realisti-

“

The only people who actually care about Samantha Cameron’s shoes, are women. The only people who ever read, write, think or care about whether her dress is from Marks & Spencer, are women" cally, it's only fair to say that women now are taken far more seriously in politics than we ever were before and things can only get better, if only we could stop bitching.

It is true, sadly, that we are cripplingly obsessed with the appearance of women in politics, and this is somewhat demeaning.

But its roots, far from being devised by bigoted men, are in the culture of trashy magazines with their unprecedented popularity for close-up paparazzi shots of cellulite-dimpled thighs, microscopic scrutiny of fashion decisions, and general magnification of bodily imperfections.

This, coupled with the recent rise in internet blogs, has given way to pioneering levels of debate over celebrities' appearances.

This, I’m sorry to say, is almost entirely the doing of women. Men aren’t inclined to follow fashion blogs. How can we honestly call ourselves feminists and viciously criticise men for objectifying us when women do it on a larger, more vindictive scale every week in Heat? I’m surprised there is no word in the English language for this type of all-female misogyny, as it strikes me that the way women treat other women is often much worse than the way men do.

There is an astounding amount of joy to be gleaned from photos of famous women looking bad. Wrong outfit choices, smeared make-up, unwashed hair; these things are written about at length with voyeuristic glee and lapped up by huge numbers. Naturally, being in the public eye, means that this is transferred onto women in politics, and so a culture is created where a disproportionate weight is attached to looking pretty. So when Gold complains that we 'encourage the objectification of female politicians', she’s right, except the ‘we’ here is us, women.

Ironically, men are, by and large, the innocent bystanders in this vicious circle.

Tuesday November 10 2009 studentnewspaper.org

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Editorial

Another General Meeting...

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Matric card at the ready ahead of next week's AGM, The Student goes through the motions...

1. ANNUAL GENERAL MONOTONY? The Student notes: 1. That on first glance this year’s EUSA AGM motions are just the usual old combination of banal rubber stamps, environmental initiatives and something about Israel. Closer inspection reveals that...this is mostly the case.

2. But that there are a couple of controversies in store.

The Student believes: 1. That buying every student who endures hours of mindless debate a pint is a cynical but probably necessary move.

2. That putting on taxis to George Square for lazy first years is a cynical and completely unnecessary move.

3. That EUSA should have read the Low Carbon Travel motion more carefully.

The Student resolves: 1. To endure hours of mindless debate.

2. To enjoy a pint on Thomas Graham.

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2. SMOKE SCREEN

Ron Hubbard in there as well.

2. And not forget to add a sticker stating that the university or EUSA “does not endorse the views contained within such books”.

The Student resolves: 1. To get a Bible out the library if it decides it wants one.

2. In the event of the Chaplaincy being closed and if we find ourselves bereft of a Bible, we will go to our best friend Google who usually sorts out all our problems.

4. LOW CARBON THOMAS The Student notes: 1. That EUSA discourages longdistance flights “taken on behalf of the Association”.

2. That Thomas Graham is flying to China to represent EUSA at a conference.

The Student believes: 1. That this is unfortunate timing.

The Student resolves: 1. Not to take any long-distance flights on behalf of The Student. Because we get offers from Fly Emirates all the time.

5. PLATFORM EUSA The Student notes: 1. That it’s pretty unlikely that Nick Griffin would come and talk in a EUSA venue anyway.

The Student believes: 1. That someone must have got pretty angry when watching Question Time the other week.

The Student resolves: 1. Not to invite Nick Griffin to Pleasance whether this gets passed or not.

2. The office is messy enough as it is without people pelting eggs and flour.

6. ENERGY EFFICIENCY The Student notes: 1. That Edinburgh is fucking freezing during winter.

The Student believes: 1. That everyone wants to be warmer in their fucking freezing Marchmont flat.

2. That everyone wants to give less money to Scottish Gas. The Student resolves: 1. To have a doze during this vote because it's obviously going to pass.

The Student notes: 1. That banning fag sales in EUSA buildings would be a welcome and progressive move.

2. That revenue from tobacco goes straight to Darling anyway.

The Student believes: 1. That EUSA probably relies on the £100,000 generated from the impulse purchases of a stuffed pitta or a Bakin’ Boys flapjack when all you really wanted was 20 B&H. The Student resolves: 1. Not to aid EUSA in “facilitating premature death, sickness and disease” by buying our cigarettes from independent retailers because that supports the local economy and that.

3. THOU SHALT HAVE A BIBLE IN GRANT HOUSE. OR SHALT THOU? The Student notes: 1. That we had an AGM debate about this four years ago.

2. Why on earth are we discussing this again?!

The Student believes: 1. That if it is “in the interests of promoting religious diversity” to put Bibles in Pollock, then perhaps we should stick the entire works of L.

We all want good teachers and good teaching.

That’s why EUSA are running the Teaching Awards: to reward those who show real commitment to their teaching at the University of Edinburgh.

Awards include University Overall High Performer Best Teacher a wards for each College Best Course Best Department Best Feedback Innovative Teaching Teaching Employable Skills Best Postgraduate Tutor E-Learning Award Internationalisation Award Nominate now at: www.eusa.ed.ac.uk/teachingawards

/teachingawards

studentnewspaper.org Tuesday November 10 2009

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A degree of affection

Christine Johnston talks to student couples who are considering joint bank accounts alongside their joint degrees university town, had the largest number of student couples who go on to marry.

The idea sat uncomfortably with the 16 year old me as he waxed lyrical about the close-knit community. Indeed, figures support this theory for university in general, the BBC claiming in April that one in five graduates go on to marry someone they met while studying.

However, many students currently in university already believe they know who they want to marry, and do not wait until they graduate to make it a reality.

In general, Britain has seen a marriage 'slump'. A 2006 report from the Office for National Statistics showed that the number of couples tying the knot had hit its biggest low since 1895, with another 2.7 percent decline in 2007. The BBC published figures from the ONS showed that the average age for men to marry for the first time stands at 31 and 29 for women. While showing an evident decline, it simultaneously proves how much engaged and married students are bucking the trend.

How difficult does this make balancing the whole affair while studying for a degree? Moreover, what effect has the recession had on love-struck couples trying to forge a new life with even fewer resources?

Unsurprisingly the majority of unions are between Christian students.

Again this shows a commitment against the norm. The BBC reported that less than half of marriages in 2007 had been religious ceremonies. Marriage is not generally on the agenda for students already embracing a new life at university. For some, it is something to be considered later in life, and for many not at all. For those who do, it might seem like a natural step, and allows them to become closer without compromising their faith and ideals. However, whether this is the first time moving out or if they have lived with other students before, ultimately they are moving to a 'home'.

The permanence of such a decision makes it all the more daunting and, perhaps consequently, brave. Committing to live with anyone is in some respects a responsibility. However, "till death do us part" is not ordinarily applicable.

Andrew is a fourth-year Engineering student at Strathclyde and is preparing to get married this year, before his exams. This is indicative of the kinds of pressures newlyweds face - their life quickly becomes a balancing act. Andrew seems very aware of the difficulties: “We spent the last few years planning, saving and working out how we could make it work. It has been very challenging to plan a wedding and cope with university, but we have used our spare time wisely.” Remaining on top of things is clearly crucial, but does not

MENNA JENKINS

t a different university's open day, A one lecturer’s claim to fame stayed with me. He boasted that they, a small

spoil determination or excitement: "With summer jobs, savings and student loans, we can survive financially, at least until we graduate and start working full-time.” They were adamant to get married before living together and have no qualms about the following years, merely anticipation.

Getting engaged after four years also proves Andrew’s point that “it wasn’t a snap decision”, and they “were both sure that we wanted to spent the rest of our lives together.” Financial difficulties and time restraints are inevitable, but a year’s engagement gave them the opportunity to address these and has enabled them to enjoy looking forward.

Closer to home, Katie is a thirdyear Psychology undergraduate at Edinburgh, who became engaged last year. Although she plans to marry after graduation, engagement has required her to have a clearer perception of her future than the majority of undergraduates. Katie cites her background as influential: "My parents married very young, while they were

students… I think the fact that they are still very much in love and happily married is an inspiration to me." At the same time, she is aware it is unusual - "I think we're very off trend!’"- and acknowledges, "It's a very personal thing."

Like Andrew, Katie is well aware of the obstacles, but preparing to avoid them. Hoping to be in work by the time she does marry, she mentions that her dad can pay for the wedding, but acknowledges that financial factors may prevent people marrying in general. As Katie is in a long-distance relationship, time as a couple is scarce, but engagement gives them something solid. Her fiancé Chris, a final-year Criminology student, comments that it felt "natural". He too is well pre-

pared: "It has made me more studious, as I have a goal in life that now involves someone else." Overall this has resulted in a "more 'mature' university experience", but a positive one nevertheless. Katie’s strong family values are a key factor in her decision: "Children are a hugely important part of marriage to me." It is also perhaps indicative of the values that engaged students might share.

Like Katie, Luke is an engaged third-year undergraduate at Edinburgh. Moreover, he too is in a long-distance relationship and feels that "deciding to move from simply being in a relationship to being engaged has a lot to do with wanting something tangible to hold on to when we're seriously missing each other." A long-distance relationship is in itself a large commitment, and perhaps proves that they have already coped with some of the difficulties intrinsic to marriage.

Similar to Andrew and Katie, Luke stresses it wasn’t a sudden or difficult decision: "Engagement is not some

massive looming commitment. It's simply the next natural step."

An alien concept to many students, it is difficult to understand that it is a 'choice' to many, when to others it may seem like a sacrifice. Then there is the added pressure to 'stick it out'. A graduate from Stirling University is a testament to surviving these obstacles.

Both he and his wife were students there when they wed in 2003. As they didn't receive financial support from her parents, they actually were allowed more benefits as a married couple - without which completing their studies would have been near impossible. He notes however, “I knew of no one else who got married while at university,” highlighting the potential isolation couples could feel.

Confidence in the decision, and perhaps having the support of others, is crucial.

He also presents a measured view, acknowledging that the perception of marriage by many students as “to an extent… a religious institution… a 'statesanctioned' relationship” was one that he himself had shared. Overall he finds the appeal lies in “marriage as a purely social institution, and also as a basis for a ceremony” but finds fault with it “on a political, bureaucratic level”. Evidently it is complex even for students who have married, especially those who are not religious, for whom it may present more problems than solutions. However their marriage has spanned six years, indicating that although the institution itself may not have been important to them, the union helped sustain them at an otherwise difficult time. However, a financial premise for marriage shatters the perception that student marriage stems from broadly religious motives.

Clearly, the trend of student marriage is much more complex and diverse than can always be accounted for.

In saying this, students who do get engaged or married have a tendency to share value systems, where family, commitment and stability are paramount.

Although not attributed to religious reasons, it is perhaps akin to a Christian perspective. Those who get married later in life do so for other reasons, immediate stability not being essential. Marriage has in some senses remained traditional, and evolved in others, encapsulating a wide variety of people and motivations.

However difficult it may be, it is a choice, and having the freedom to choose is the essential factor. Andrew acknowledges how 'young' it may sound to others, but he claims: “It might be the most challenging time of your life but that doesn’t mean it’s not worth it!”

Evidently it is a scary decision at a time when little else is certain. There is no right or wrong, only the assurance that diverse qualities and varied life choices make up the student body, which, surely, could never be considered as negative.

Tuesday November 10 2009 studentnewspaper.org

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features@studentnewspaper.org

Features

Words are the models,

Sara D'Arcy visits the Independent and Radical Book Fair and chats with Ann Rossiter about the increasing importance of dialogue in political activism word. Local Edinburgh publishers and independent bookshop, Word Power Books, launched its 13th Independent and Radical Book Fair last weekend, which saw authors come together with the public to talk about and inspire political activism. The power of the word is having a comeback.

If you take a quick glance back to revolutionary movements of the past, they all begin at the grass-roots, with the opinions of the community. Big ideas like socialism, feminism and the Civil Rights movement all started with like-minded people, disgruntled by the status quo, meeting in coffee shops.

Just like I am today with the feminist writer Ann Rossiter, who is taking part in the Independent and Radical Book Fair. Rossiter is in Edinburgh to talk about her latest book, Ireland's Hidden Diaspora: The 'Abortion Trail' and the making of a London-Irish Underground, 1980-2000, and inspire political activism around an issue that is threatened

by Parliament and neglected in the community.

Political activism has been under

“

Words do not save lives, but the effect they have on people can inspire and motivate action, which is why she got involved in this year's Independent and Radical Book Fair."

interrogation at the University of Edinburgh recently. Questions are being asked about the effectiveness of local activism such as last year's occupation of George Square lecture theatre, fight for a boycott of University ties with Israeli institutions, and the 'clowning' around at the Careers Fair. But without this activism, be it spoken, written or direct action, where would we be?

I ask Rossiter whether she believes that the power of the word is still effective in challenging the issues within society. She pauses for thought. Then answers: "I think the way in which it acts on people has that power." She is right - words do not save lives but the effect they have on people can inspire and motivate action, which is why she

got involved in this very book fair. Rossiter believes that alternative book fairs are "hugely important, so much now is corporate. Even the academic world is corporate. Students are no longer students. They're clients. And that level of control can be very serious, especially when it comes to the media. You can say that the internet is kind of without

“

The only way to overcome this violation of human rights is to have "a detailed examination of this silence" on the issue of reproductive rights."

boundaries, but these events are much more tangible than speaking to someone over Twitter or Facebook. They may be old fashioned, but I think that there is a real place for them. People come together." It is this coming together that makes all the difference to Rossiter. It takes political activism back to its roots in discussion and it is this dialogue that is so fundamental to Rossiter.

So why did she choose to discuss the issue of abortion in her book? "It is essential to women's ability to function in the world. It must be an absolute right that they can control their fertility."

Women's rights have always been intertwined with the right to control one's own fertility. For instance, women only gained a stable position in the workplace once the 1967 Abortion Act and the 1975 Sexual Discrimination Acts were introduced. Rossiter exclaims that "the 1967 Act made a huge difference" to women's lives, and described the 'buzz' among the people who attended her event at the Independent and Radical Book Fair. Yet behind the backdrop of this energy, inspiration and discussion there is a threat. "One never knows what kind of threat there will be to it," explains a disheartened Rossiter, "there has been so much opposition. Matters of abortion are expected to be devolved to Northern Ireland by the end of the year.

This would put an end to any thought about extending the act to Northern Ireland." She states that this has been

WEIGHTY WORDS: The impact radical literature can have on individual thought what the Pro-Choice movement has been struggling for in the past eighteen months, "to try and extend it before this terrible day comes."

But what can we, in other parts of the UK, do about it?

"We need to broaden out the debate," is Rossiter's answer. "There has not been enough publicising" and many people are not aware that abortion in Northern Ireland is still illegal and that Northern Irish women are denied control over their fertility that other women in the UK can access.

"Women's fertility," Rossiter states, "and the control thereof, is very personal, but it is also a major political issue. It affects people's lives, and how the state deals with you." The only way to overcome this violation of human rights is to have "a detailed examination of this silence" on the issue of reproductive rights. "I am one of millions of Irish women, we need to talk about it. It is the secrecy that is feeding in to all of

these unfounded fears." She suggests that "women are the unofficial police" of reproductive freedoms and the only way to resolve this issue is by project-

“

We need to broaden out the abortion debate."

ing the debate "into the discourse of society. We must try to take these ideas out there. I am interested in political activism that is the only way that we

will change society."

I ask Rossiter what inspires her to write her books. It's an easy answer: "From all the activism. The next book I am writing is about the lives of ordinary women who have been involved in community activism, things around the national question, and activism around the Birmingham Six. Women who look ordinary, you would walk past them on the street, yet they are really quite heroic.

Let's do what shouldn't have to be done; recover history. Look for prototypes from the past. Look at women who have had lives that are less than ordinary."

It seems that political activism is just as important now, as it was at any other point in history, and the practices have not changed that much either. Rossiter wants to kick-start the revolution using the word: "Let's tease out the strands and see what the problem is. Have a discussion." So let's start talking about it, and re-energise the power of the word.

DAN SMEETH

adicalism is going back to the R drawing board. And by drawing board, I mean back to the power of the

Got a story to tell? features@studentnewspaper.org

Tuesday November 10 2009 studentnewspaper.org

Features 11

words are the tools...

Does the common book shop need to turn over a new leaf? Jonny Brick checks out Edinburgh's commercial credentials as a UNESCO City of Literature he results of a survey published in T The Times on October 27 are both sad and inevitable. “Sightings of small bookstores have become increasingly rare. A survey of more than 700 town centres found that... nearly 13 percent of independent bookshops — or 731 — shut” this year, prompting the editorial line “it’s not just the economy, stupid”. With big retailers such as Borders in trouble − indeed, a few hundred retail bookstores shut in the survey’s gestation period − the dissolution of the British bookstore is, if not nigh, then close to it. If you have clicked on the ‘buy’ button on any website, with their digital

“

Second-hand stores offer books stacked upon books in a sort of leaning tower of Peace or Satre." printing and free delivery, you have unwittingly helped this demise.

But hold your flagellation; this is the future, with unlimited warehouse space for physical copies as an inventory that can be topped up via printon-demand, as well as boost pre-release sales that has seen J.K.Rowling and Dan Brown reach the doorsteps of eager fans’ homes without days of queuing outside a Waterstones or Blackwells. It makes more economic sense for sites like Amazon or play. com to sell the books cheaper than the aforementioned stores, which have to meet ghastly overheads and put on deals and three-for-two offers to sell more in the Christmas rush.

Alan Jamieson runs the Edinburgh University’s Creative Writing MSc, and is a published poet.

“Publishing is currently undergoing a huge transformation, perhaps as great as the coming of print itself.

The electronic age is upon us: Kindles may be the way ahead for text, just as music is now exchanged by mp3 files. But the appetite for new (and old) writing is not diminished by that; if anything, judging by the growth in the exchange of poetry and short fiction via social network sites, it is increasing. The problem,” he notes, “is how to make money out of these exchanges. Visionary publishers such as Salt are using new technology intelligently to build reader networks, but the bookshops are seriously under threat.”

So as an alternative to reading text on a screen or a badly-edited manuscript hastily printed from a

digital database, the future, as ever, is the past. In this fine city, a UNESCO literary city of course, one can’t move for the second-hand bookstores.

If you look hard enough mildewed paperbacks, prudently-priced first editions and hardbound sets can be discovered; books stacked upon books in a sort of leaning tower of Peace or Sartre. The decline of such shops in the British high street is at odds with three factors. Firstly, the popularity of the charity shop where

Britons donate unloved paperbacks so new readers can share the thrill of plot and character whilst helping the needy. Nicholson Street does this best, and in the West End I picked up a Da Vinci Code for the price of a pint.

Regardless of Brown’s pathetic prose, this is to be commended as a bargain.

Secondly, book-sharing websites such as readitswapit.co.uk (“We have 294,722 books” boasted the site on October 27, with the Twilight series being inexcusably popular). The car

boot sale-esque, second-hand trading on these websites offer thrills for a reasonable wallet spill. Third, the book festival has had a great decade with Cheltenham and Edinburgh, among others, hosting huge conven-

“

Unless Amazon starts opening retail stores, it won't be long until we're a one-chain bookstore nation." tions where both popular and niche authors talk, sign, Q&A and mingle with the masses. Anthony Horowitz is reading his new book at the Filmhouse this Thursday, November 12.

Poets make a living on such readings and workshops. The appetite for the printed word, though less monetarily profitable, is still sharp for many and helps propel civilisation in the age of the lolcat.

Beth Anderson, an Edinburgh English literature graduate and current part of Glasgow University’s Creative Writing programme, affirms Edinburgh's appeal as literary city: “Edinburgh is the obvious choice for studying English Literature: Scott, Stevenson, Rankin and even Rowling are names that come to mind. What better place to study literature than Scotland's beautiful capital? There must be something about the city alone that inspired such genius..”

“It is important to bear in mind that creative writing has a number of functions beyond commerce,” hastens Alan Jamieson. “It is highly useful in education and therapy, in so-called personal development, never mind as a commodity to be bought and sold.”

Students based at the David Hume Tower may well have bought many books from ‘Book Guy’, whose weekly stall in the DHT basement draws regular punters from all disciplines. Sally Roberston, a second-year German student, said of the DHT bookseller: "You know that whatever is on the stall is likely to be donated from fellow students, so you're more likely to get titles which are relevant to your course. at a much cheaper price than Blackwells. It's also a nice way to spend time browsing for interesting finds between lectures."

Dylan Moran, the Edinburgh-

based comedian and star of the comedy series Black Books, set in a second-hand bookstore, cites his inspiration as a 'miserable' Irish owner who was microcosmic of all such sellers. Though surliness is, to be sure, the default setting for the archetypal book-shop owner, those at Southside Books and on West Port - the latter of whom held a well-received festival of their own in August - are affable and charming.

Such friendliness is also to be found in chain bookstores, but stock checks and ‘have you got the new book by whatshername?’ tend to grind the people in uniforms down, PhD or no PhD. A former employee at one such store, who also studied English Literature at Edinburgh, denied that the closure of stores was caused by an attenuation in people's interest in reading. Again the Amazon problem reared its head: “I lost shifts because the shop had to streamline its staffing and many part-time staff were made redundant.

I think it's incredibly sad,” she adds, “that people don't value books enough to take the time to walk to their local bookshop, browse the shelves and pay for it at a price which reflects the effort that has gone into producing it.”

Alex Brick, European Chief Exec of a leading global insolvency firm as well as being a keen bibliophile, outlines the economics of bookselling today: “Publishers set a minimum price and, when you add on the cost of rent, rates, staff and other ancillary overheads, the price of each sale is significant. In the case of Borders, they simply were unable to compete with the online retailers such as Amazon. The new owners are attempting to renegotiate the rents with landlords but it appears the demise of all but the very small, low-rented book-shop, is now taking hold. Unless Amazon starts opening retail stores, it will not be too far down the road that we will be a one chain bookstore nation.”

Despite this gloom from those who care about profit margins, Alan Jamieson’s optimism echoes the feelings of many who turn pages in bath, on beach or in private contemplation elsewhere: “The book is an extremely successful piece of technology in itself. Its future existence in some form is most likely a safe bet.”

Tuesday November 10 2009 culture.thestudent@gmail.com

12 Review

CULTURE The Big Picture

BRIAN HEWITT: ENDOSYMBIONT 2009 "OUR SMUDGE count is high with all the noses pressed up against the glass eagle-eyeing Endosymbiont every night", reads Inspace’s facebook status. Brian Hewitt’s work, simultaneously on show at New Media Scotland’s new forum and Talbot Rice gallery, is garnering an unprecedented amount of curiosity from the student populace. But what does it all mean?

What Endosymiont is doing is more revolutionary than it might at first appear.

As a struggling layman, this is how I would attempt to describe it: the scrolling data depicts genetic coding for different bacterial forms.

Hewitt has created a programme that randomly simulates mutations in this data, which are represented by white blocks. Over time, the programme will amass so many mutations that it will create entirely new (albeit entirely virtual) forms of life.

The science is complicated but the underlying concept is mercifully simple: it is a celebration of life as data, and of the massive effect that tiny miscalculations in this data can have on life as we know it.

‘Endosymiont’ is a part of Talbot Rice’s ‘An Entangled Bank’ exhibition, closing 12 December; and Inspace’s ‘Are We Human’ exhibition.

Brian Hewitt Endosymbiont 2009, programming-based projections and LCD displays. courtesy of the artist and Talbot Rice Gallery COMEDY AT PLEASANCE: DANNY WARD AND CHRISTIAN REILLY

THE PILLOWMAN

Comedy ticket give-away!

4 & 5 NOVEMBER

3 NOVEMBER

BEDLAM THEATRE

PLEASANCE CABARET BAR



 STRANGE OBJECTS, strange behaviour and strange music were the order of the evening at this week’s Pleasance Comedy Club, where an unusually small crowd were treated to an unconventional and enjoyable performance by Danny Ward and Christian Reilly.

After enthusiastically bounding onto the stage and shaking hands with the front row, opener Danny Ward set the tone for his bizarre set by promptly scrubbing himself with hand sanitiser and staring down the riff-raff with whom he had just been in contact.

The man from Plymouth embarked upon a set marked by his own attempt at audience participation – “what do you do?” he would ask, “Economics”, would be the response of the hapless audience member, only to be greeted with: “So you’re a mechanic are you?” .

For all its unoriginality, Ward’s over-played lack of interest in his punters went down well. As the night progressed numerous members of the intimate crowd had their names placed in Ward’s little black book as he jumped spontaneously from jolly conversationalist to stern disciplinarian.

While a little light on truly enthusiastic laughter, Ward’s neurotic style of comedy was warmly received by the regulars at the Cabaret Bar who no doubt sympathised greatly with the contents of Ward’s finale; a treatise on the perils of the random goods aisle at Lidl.

The kooky atmosphere created by Ward was perpetuated by the arrival of headliner Christian Reilly who, for the first time this year, brought musical comedy to the Pleasance.

Strumming his way through a bru-

Luke Healey

tally honest series of musical impersonations ( James Brown’s last words?

“I feel bad”), Reilly brought his music into discussions of love in all its forms, from the mundane to the filthy.

Musically talented and with an excellent sense of self, Reilly held court while singing but was let down by the slightly dull stand-up between the musical interludes.

“

Ward's neurotic style of comedy was warmly received by the regulars who no doubt sympathised greatly with the contents of his finale; a treatise on the perils of the random goods aisle at Lidl" Throughout a set which often pushed the boundaries of good taste, in a way that only a filthy song can, Reilly employed his guitar, voice and face to bend the audience to his will.

What had been a quiet audience at the night’s beginning raucously demanded the latter when given a choice

by Reilly between a “safe” or “edgy” song to close the evening. And given the often clean-cut nature of student audiences, to provoke such demands is no mean feat.

Charlie Shute

PHILIP LARKIN’S ‘This Be the Verse’ illustrates the head of The Pillowman’s programme. If you find the poem disconcerting, beware of more disturbances to come as this both real and unreal, heartbreaking and comical play will soon reveal a few gruesome stories which leave the only option of chuckling with unease at the absurdity of life.

Katurian Katurian, a writer living in a totalitarian state, finds himself arrested and accused for strange murders because of the stories he has written.

He is questioned by two policemen, Tupolski and Ariel, a classic good cop/bad cop pairing who have some surprises in store for their detainee. When his brother Michal becomes involved, Kuturian seems to sink further into the inescapable, violent nightmare.

Martin McDonagh’s darkly amusing play is here given an outstanding adaptation. The emphasis in the plot is on story-telling and artistic creation, something Katurian as a writer brings up in the beginning of his interrogation, which appear as motifs from time-to-time.

The stories keep on unravelling with new twists and frightening revelations and Katurian comes to understand the full extent of his responsibilities.

The spectacular lighting and inventive sound design create an enthrallingly tragic and eerie atmosphere. The sombre plot is combined with whimsical but clever puppetry, bringing forth a mystical dreamworld.

Everything, from the exuber-

ant costumes and make-up of the chorus to the props and puppets, is impressive and shows the stage managers’ creativity and innovation.

The performances of Robin Hellier, as nervously blabbering Katurian, and Chris Cotter, as sinisterly calm Tupolski, stand out as particularly affecting although the

“

Performances by Robin Hellier, as the nervously blabbering Katurian, and Chris Cotter as the sinisterly calm Tupolski, stand out as particularly affecting" entire cast does a very good job.

The members of the chorus reenact Katurian’s stories with skill, filling the stage with harmonious voices and movements. The surrealism of those scenes is excellently handled, maintaining the ability to return to the cruel reality from which these tales sprung.

The only shame here is that this fascinating rendition runs for a very limited time. Hopefully they will get another chance to give a few more performances, as this is a show well worth seeing.

Helen Harjak

Fancy getting your hands on a pair of free tickets for The Laughter Show with Patrick Monahan & Guests for Sat 14 Nov at Edinburghs' Queen's Hall?

Simply answer the following question and email it to the culture team at culture.thestudent@gmail.com by Thursday 12 November.

Complete the name of one of Patrick Monahan's 2009 Edinburgh Festival shows: Stories & Fables for Kids who like ...

Good luck!

And if you don't win this time, The Queen's Hall are doing a special deal for The Student readers with tickets for the show being reduced by half price to £10. Just take your matric card to the box office to receive your discount.

Tuesday November 10 2009 studentnewspaper.org

culture.thestudent@gmail.com

Review 13 STAR RATING Sublime genius

THE HOUSE OF BERNADA ALBA

Doodles

 Obscure ramblings

Illegible scribbles

Unprintable filth

RUN ENDED

Artist in focus: Tom Gauld

KING'S THEATRE



Luke Healey goes from the sublime to the ridiculous with the world-renowned illustrator and ECA graduate You said of the main character in your new book The Gigantic Robot that “I was trying to make an image which was a cross between something out of a computer game and a Hogarth engraving.” This is an eclectic duo of sources. What would you identify are the main starting-points and inspirations for your work?

I get inspired by all sorts of things but one persistent thing which inspires me is to take some grand, great idea (moon landings, war, prehistoric man etc.) and look at it in quite a banal way. I’ve done this quite a few times and it usually amuses me. I imagine (perhaps wrongly) that most people are a bit like me and that life is mainly made up of quiet moments and ordinary conversations rather than heroics and great speeches. Juxtaposing epic and minute things seems interesting to me. The Gigantic Robot features the image you mention but undercuts the epic qualities of the image with a story which never really goes anywhere.

One of my favourite examples of this has to be your mini-comic ‘Invasion’, which seems to make quite a poignant observation about how our relationships work better when we’re content with everyday minutiae. Your work has a consistently humane, common-sense logic to it.

I think that’s probably true. The characters in my stories often get into trouble when they try to be too grand, or do what they think somebody else thinks they ought to do.

Do you draw energy from the illustration scene that surrounds you? Who are your favourite contemporaries?

I share a studio with lots of other illustrators and designers and I like being around them and being able to encourage and learn from each other. I look at the work of lots of other illustrators, artists, writers, cartoonists and film makers for inspiration, sometimes more technically: how they draw something or design a page, and sometimes just for more general inspiration from their stories or ideas. I’m inspired by the illustrations and cartoons of (off the top of my head) Benoit Jacques, Seth, Chris Ware, Jochen Gerner and Jamie Hewlett.

I think there’s some truth in that. I grew up in the countryside near Aberdeen where it can be even bleaker so that probably plays into it too. The architecture in Edinburgh was definitely an interest while I was there.

Among many other things, you’ve been commissioned by Boots, worked regularly for The Guardian and illustrated Ted Hughes. Any all-time favourite commissions?

Tom Gauld, Guardian Letters Page , courtesy of the artist And (long-term collaborative partner) Simone Lia...?

Yes, I like Simone’s work a lot, Fluffy (her Graphic Novel) is fantastic, I can’t wait to see how her next thing turns out.

Looking through your sketchbooks (recently published on the Cultural Review blog) it emerges that a lot of your drawings seem to result from doodles of machines…

I do like to make drawings of machines and robots and the like, and they definitely have a retro feel which I suppose is partly because I like the look of old machines and partly because (particularly in the case of the robots) I think the reader will feel a bit more sympathy for something a bit clumsy or out-of-date.

You somehow manage to make us feel for machines without anthropomorphising them. Do you think it’s the clumsiness that makes them so endearing?

Yes, I think that’s part of it. I like to leave my characters rather blank and I hope that makes the reader sympathize more. I think the more ‘room’ you can leave for the reader to project themselves into the story, to think ‘how would I feel here’, the better.

Do you feel most comfortable creating your own narratives or illustrating those of others?

I’m definitely more interested in creating my own narratives. Even if it's just a one-off image, I like the idea of suggesting a story; what happened before the point depicted, what will happen after.

But having said that it can be much harder doing it all yourself, starting from scratch with only one’s own ideas. There’s something nice about doing an illustration as you are given a lot of restrictions: it must relate to the text, be a specific size and be finished by a deadline, and I find this quite liberating in a way. I can get a bit bogged down with all the possibilities when I’m creating my own whole thing.

Do you recognise any visible effects of your Edinburgh art-school education in your work?

My time at college in Edinburgh had a huge effect on my work. The head of the Illustration Department Jonathan Gibbs was a great tutor and really helped me find what I wanted to do with my work.

He also had a copy of an Edward Gorey book (I forget which) in his office, I’d never seen one before and Gorey became a big influence on my work. I really enjoyed my time at Edinburgh and found the atmosphere and being around lots of enthusiastic, creative people really pushed me to make more, better, work.

I think the atmosphere of Edinburgh in general - the macabre history, the ghost tours, the old stone, the gloomy weather - also shows through.

RUNNING TIME UNTIL 22 NOV DEAN GALLERY

 ONE OF the first things you hear when you walk into the Dean Gallery is the attendant’s loud tartan trousers; the first thing you see is his finger pointing upwards…the dome in the entrance has been turned into a giant projective video screen. Looking up, his trousers quieten down and you begin to notice the ambient music which fills the hall. Every synchronous note punctuating the visual syntax overhead, a hybrid grammar which renders video art as perhaps the most fluid and dynamic of all mediums.

Running Time is ‘timely, if not overdue’ according to Beagles and Ramsey, two of the artists whose video work is on display in the gallery’s upper screening rooms. I am inclined to disagree: it is, quite

Beagles and Ramsey Glitter Desert 2 2007, photograph courtesy of the artists simply, outstanding. The show operates on the premise that video art, particularly of Scottish stock, has never really had a fair showing until now.

To redress the balance the curators have plundered the archives to bring a truly wondrous collection of video art produced in Scotland over the past five decades to the big screen – two to be precise – and the three smaller

ones at the Dean Gallery. Each week a specific thematic will be addressed: Portraits in Action, Places in Time, Drama and Suspense, Sound and Vision and finally Form In Motion.

Walking into the first screen you are halted by a man running full pelt yet seemingly going nowhere. 'Running Time', produced by Jason Dee, tampers with continuity and sound editing in

Boots was a favourite commission but mainly because they paid very well! The weekly illustration I do for The Guardian is one of my favourite things to do.

I like the fact that it’s a little weekly challenge to do something quickly (I get less than 24 hours to do it) on what can sometimes be quite an obscure subject (the cartoon is on the letters page and the editors choose one of the letters as my subject for the week). It’s also nice that I don’t have to do preliminary sketches and have them approved, I just make a cartoon and they publish it.

Less than 24 hours! How on earth do you manage that?!

It’s a small image so it only takes 2-3 hours to make the finished art, it’s coming up with the concept which takes time, but even that I can usually do in a couple of hours of proper focused thinking-time.

Can you let us in on what you’re working on next?

I’m working on a longer story - I'd hesitate to say Graphic Novel as that sounds rather grand and very long, but I suppose that’s what it will be. I’ve been working on this idea for a while and really struggling with the longer format, though hopefully things are coming together a bit more now. I don’t want to say too much about it as I’m still at the beginning really.

Finally, a cheesy one to wrap things up: what would you say to Edinburgh-based youngsters aspiring to become illustrators?

Just get a notebook and start drawing (and writing) in it... a metaphorical homage to Buster Keaton’s entire oeuvre, underscoring the visuals with a cheeky score that is ever so slightly mismatched to the action.

Physicality and corporeality are a common visual thread stitching together a body of works whose source material is, implicitly, the Scottish nation itself. 'Limbo Land' turns a highland beach into a lunar surface; 'Gagging' and 'Dead Red' toy with the erotogenicity of the mouth, either gagged or covered in disturbing blood red lipstick.

Running Time showcases the best, brightest and most damnably intriguing video art produced by Scottish artists over the last 50 years.

Video may not have the killed the radio star just yet, but if you want to get some sense of just what The Buggles were on about, make sure you don’t miss out. Run along now…

Gordon Mclean

THE RAINBEATEN ganglands of Glasgow couldn’t be further from the original sun-bleached setting of Federico Garcia Lorca’s tragedy The House of Bernarda Alba but that’s just the scenario adopted

by Rona Munro in her gritty new take on the 1930’s masterpiece.

The late Tony Alba, infamous Glaswegian club owner, has left everything to his step-daughter Angus; a plain, schooled but impractical, woman who is detested by her four high-maintenance and high-tempered half sisters. Tony’s widow, the ferocious matriarch Bernie Alba, is left to secure a future for herself and her daughters amid constant police pressure, probing journalists and competing families.

Confined to their flat above the club, the women’s claustrophobia intensifies as sibling rivalries reach fever pitch. When the youngest sister Adie gets entangled in a love affair with Angus’ intended husband and business partner, Peter Romanov, tragedy is bound to follow.

Lorca never lived to see his work performed, murdered as he was for

“

Munro's provoking new adaptation realises the play's former potency" his homosexuality and left-wing sympathies two months after its completion in 1936. The original is fairly inaccessible to a twentyfirst century audience, as the social faux-pas of the thirties seem harmless, but Munro’s provocative new adaption realises the play’s potency.

Bernie Alba, a challenging role for the most adroit actress, is beautifully realised in Siobhan Redmond’s portrayal of a volatile woman torn between maternal instinct and the necessity to prosper. Una Maclean’s outstanding performance as Bernie’s senile and attention-starved mother Mary, imprisoned in her room for her condition, is similarly worthy of note in spite of her short stage time.

Visually, too, the show wants for nothing. The set’s narrow perspective through the dormer window of a topfloor flat intensifies the claustrophobic tension and exposes the limitations of the character's world. Lorca’s original setting is hinted at everywhere; in Spanish fans, pictures, figurines and the club’s name, pink and neon above the window; “El Paso”.

There is a problem, though: the Glaswegian accents. In places they are a little too authentic, veering towards gibberish on a few occasions. The greatest offender is Bernie’s oldest comrade Penny, who talks with such speed and gusto that at times she simply cannot be understood. It’s a great loss, as she is frequently the comic figure in an otherwise formidable piece.

It seems that all this 'hard-hitting' theatre is particularly in vogue these days, but rarely is it executed without reverting to mere histrionics. The House of Bernarda Alba achieves tension within the calmest of scenes that shatters with such startling force that ultimately even the formidable Bernie must endure a loss of her own making.

Debbie Hicks

Tuesday November 10 2009 studentnewspaper.org

Got a story to tell? lifestyle.studentnewspaper@googlemail.com

14 Lifestyle

I

t’s that time of the year again when people pessimistically utter "It’s that time of the year" again.

That time of year when we inevitably feel deflated, a feeling that manifests itself both emotionally and physically. The inevitable late nights and early starts, combined with a dip in finances and a nasty turn in weather, mean we become more susceptible to symptoms of SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) and stress.

While some would say that this stress stems from the pressure of deadlines and approaching exams, academic issues are not the only cause. Harry Wallop of The Daily Telegraph claims that by being ‘wired’ 24/7, we are contributing to our stress levels. Constant phone calls, texts, emails, Facebook messages and tweets mean we have to be alert to problems on many levels. Interestingly though, deciding to take a day off and turning off your phone or internet is actually likely to increase, rather than decrease, stress amongst our age group.

And let’s face it: we have the rest of our working lives to stress out. Stress triggers high levels of adrenaline and cortisol which use up significant amounts of vitamin C, magnesium and zinc. These vitamins are intrinsic to helping you produce collagen which keeps skin clear, as well as fight infections and maintain blood pressure. A lack of magnesium also causes headaches and a general groggy feeling; this becomes a nightmare when that all-important essay deadline is fast approaching.

Thankfully, small changes can make a big difference. A small increase in exercise helps as endorphins lift your mood and you get the blood pumping around your body. By simply increasing your intake of healthy fats (found in nuts and oily fish) you can also help replace lost vitamins and reduce your likelihood of headaches.

Antioxidants, found in green tea or blueberries, can also help counteract the oxidation of the blood which is caused by stress.

But limit caffeine, sugar and alcohol. Your Starbucks and Green and Blacks (though admittedly very tasty) can actually take up more nutrients to digest, and the slump after the glucose high can leave you feeling worse off than before. Psychologically, planning your day can help, as structure has been shown to help combat stress.

Finally, making sure you take time off is crucial, even if it is half an hour a day to read a (nonacademic) book, listen to some music or chill out with friends. If it is planned, you can avoid feeling guilty about not working.

For more tips or to talk to someone about stress, phone someone at Nightline or talk to family and friends. The Student Counselling Service also organises stress workshops for those keen to learn long-term strategies to combat student stress.

Ultimately, it’s important to remember one thing: you are not alone.

Emma Segal

Binge Britain no more?

Caitlin McDonald looks at the effects of the new alcohol licensing laws W e’ve all been there on a boozy night out – one too many Jagerbombs and we’re suddenly subjecting random members of the public to impromptu Spice Girls singalongs and nicking traffic cones for hats.

However, imagine if pictures of you caught with your pants down (quite literally) became front-page news.

That’s exactly what happened to 20-year-old Sarah Lyons from Cardiff: photos of her dancing in the street, sporting an LBD and a fetching pair of knickers round her ankles, were splashed across the papers.

Lyons soon became a national figurehead of our binge-drinking culture - never mind that the David Hasselhoff undercrackers weren’t hers, or that she claims she wasn’t even drinking that night.

Student Philip Laing found himself in a similar position after photos of him weeing on a war memorial were held up as yet another example of today’s flawed youth running wasted and wild.

He’d been on a £10-a-ticket pub crawl with Sheffield Uni freshers, organised by notorious student night promoters Carnage UK, and soon after the incident landed himself in court. You would think the government would do something about it, wouldn’t you? Well, they have – apparently.

On the 1st of September this year, the Licensing (Scotland) Act 2005 came into effect, banning drink promotions and happy hours in an attempt to improve the nation’s health, one pint at a time.

Remember the good old days of £1 vodka-and-mixer nights (well, actually you probably don’t)? The new laws mean that bars and pubs are now required to run such promotions for

at least 72 hours, and as a result most venues are choosing to pursue the profits and drop the deals.

One such establishment is the perennially popular Assembly Bar on Lothian Street: because of the new laws, they’ve abandoned their 2-for-1 deals on cocktails, and instead drastically changed their marketing strategy to focus on beers and wines.

Manager Wes Hall is disappointed with the new laws and is not convinced by the promised health benefits: “Cocktails have been hit hard. It’s a bit of a shame, because with our 2-for-1 deal people could experiment with cocktails and have a few nice drinks with friends before they went out, but now they’re being held back.

"Personally, I think that if people really want to binge drink, they’re going to find a way to do it anyway.”

As ever, though, innovative pubs and clubs are coming up with sneaky ways around the new rules – take student favourite Why Not? on George Street, for example.

Prior to the amendments, punters were given a free pitcher of cocktails as they entered to get their night off to a good start and, presumably, a messy end.

When the law changed in September and bars were no longer allowed to dole out free booze, as customers queued for the club they were given two options: either pay a fiver for your entry fee on the door, or get in for free but buy a compulsory pitcher of your choice – for a fiver.

Hmm, you don’t need to be a maths student - or even sober - to work out which one’s the better deal.

When we phoned them up, staff member Jim Meenan was keen to point out that although they don’t offer any drinks promotions at all any

more, he “would be surprised to find out that anywhere else was doing any deals.”

He said he’d seen the health benefits already, as patrons aren’t throwing up on the dance floor early on in the night and are lasting longer – and the club is now making more money than ever, riding high on the profit of full-price spirits.

So there you have it: the government’s valiantly trying to look after our livers, but students are valiantly continuing to find ways to destroy them.

Still, if you want to get really pissed, get down to Cardiff – and don’t forget your comedy pants.

Meat vs veg: The smackdown

Joseph James Sherwen tastes an epic battle between two favourite foods reetings sports fans and welcome menu, a decent selection of beers and the chickpeas, lentils and peas are delivers the old one-two, a melt-inG to ‘which lifestyle choice would friendly staff to enhance your veggie perfectly flavoured, but the moneythe-mouth rib-eye steak and jalapeno win in a bare-knuckle cage match’. experience. shot is a cracking saag paneer: a sauce followed by a formidable burger.

This week’s grudge match has been brewing ever since kids started hurling unwanted vegetables and was practically boiling over when guests at dinner parties began to demand meat-free options.

That’s right, it’s the showdown between vegetarian and carnivore restaurants and this student is willing to use his food journalism training to settle the ancient dispute.

Each competitor will assault my mouth with their best few dishes and I will subsequently tell you which lifestyle choice is best.

Now, let’s take a look at the combattants...

Hailing from the home of vegetarians and weighing in at £9 per main, it’s India’s own Ann Purna!

This critically acclaimed Gujarati restaurant in St. Patrick Square has been winning praise for quite some time, yet there is nothing pretentious about this clean and straightforward eatery.

It has a small but well-structured

It’s a strong contender and is going to take a lot to beat it.

Fortunately, standing up for those who enjoy a mean slab of animal on their plates, we have a formidable opponent indeed.

Originating from the land of supersized meat portions, the big bad US of A, and weighing in at £8 per main it’s the Buffalo Grill!

Bringing cuisine from the Midwest to Chapel Street, it's got a mouth-watering selection of classic meat dishes to kick your appetite in the particulars.

It’s also the only affordable eatery where I’ve been asked how I want my burger cooked, a welcome indicator that it’s good quality meat that they’re putting on my plate.

Ann Purna is the first to step up to the plate with a flurry of traditional curry dishes in small pots accompanied by the classic poppadoms, rice and unleavened breads and an array of colourful sauces should you wish to use spice to blow your face off.

It’s a powerful opening combo as

spinach dish with paneer cheese (essentially a buff tofu).

I cannot stop eating and the referee has to drag me away from the cheeky lemon and pistachio dessert pot.

I’ve taken a firm beating but it’s the Buffalo’s turn. It

The meat has been handled handsomely, if swamped with sauce, but it’s tasty and my God does it hit the spot!

However there was an underhand corn on the cob, violating the rules and making this contest void. Shameful, yes, but at least it wasn’t disrupted by vegan extremists.

The verdict? If it weren’t for Buffalo Grill’s sneaky corn, the outcome would still be equal. Both restaurants serve some cracking dishes with style.

Basically, it comes down to which team you root for.

SHAN BERTELLI

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Tuesday November 10 2009 film@studentnewspaper.org

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16 Review

FILM

5 Films... ...The Best Guilty Pleasures

Bring it on (2000) ‘We cheer and we lead, we act like we’re on speed ‘cause we’re cheerleaders, we are cheerleaders!’. Does the sheer genius of the rhyme scheme and the assertion that cheerleaders could be, well, leaders of anything other than pom-poms force you to cringe a wee bit? Well, it should.

Especially if you remember the gaggles of pre-pubescent girls nearly a decade ago packed on school buses chiming along to such fluffy nonsense… and you were one of them. Catchy tunes, brightly coloured cheerleaders, and a plot where nothing mentally taxing happens makes this film one of our top guilty pleasures.

Caddy Shack (1980) This hysterical golfing comedy - (yes, of course there is such a thing!) - is set against the back drop of the ever so hoity-toity Bushwood country club. It sets the caddies against the establishment in an hour or so of ridiculous slapstick humour, and a surrealist neverending ramble to kill a gopher. The plot is so cringe-worthingly appalling that it somehow manages to become good.

This hole-in-one is en route to the guiltiest of guilty pleasures, but if you question me about it, I will vehemently deny it.

Honest.

Death Becomes Her (1992) The last word in dark, camp comedy, Meryl Streep and Goldie Hawn play lifelong rival fifty-somethings who both buy a secret potion to arrest the aging process. However, they find out they have also become immortal when they try to kill each other over a love feud, resulting in Goldie Hawn walking around with a huge shotgun wound in her stomach for most of the film. Bruce Willis is almost unrecognisable, but effective, as the geeky plastic surgeon the two are warring over. A desereved Oscar winner.

Ten Things I Hate About You (1999) Being a seemingly fairly typical American teen comedy, we try to avoid this,but end up re-watching it again and again.

Loosely based on Shakespeare's The Taming of the Shrew, the film follows the loves and losses of sisters Bianca and Kat Stratford (Julia Stiles). The film kickstarted the careers of Stiles and Heath Ledger, who are able to rise above their stereotyped characters, and display none of the stitledness that affect many fanous actors on their first outing.

BRIGHT STAR DIRECTED BY JANE CAMPION 

right Star is all at once the most B subtle and heart-wrenchingly tragic of love stories. Directed by

Jane Campion (The Piano, Portrait of a Lady), this re-telling of the soulful first love of 19th century romantic poet John Keats (Ben Whishaw) and Fanny Brawne is quite stunning.

It is a quiet tale, the real intensity of the story being revealed through the sensual glances and anguished yearning of the two main characters.

Abbie Cornish gives a hauntingly beautiful performance as Brawne, the great love of Keats who acts as both his poetic inspiration and captor. Throughout the film, her character develops from a young woman who cares only for sewing and flirtation into a troubled and tarnished victim, affected to the core by the poetry of the man she loves.

Campion’s screenplay is unusual - it seems to mirror the affair narrated, the main action taking place within the first half hour and the second half slow and melancholic, yet becoming more poignant and affecting in the process.

The audience is given time to contemplate the emotions of the characters as they watch, in the same way that one may contemplate a poem written by Keats himself and, without realising it, become

THE MEN WHO STARE AT GOATS DIRECTED BY GRANT HESLOV  he Men Who Stare at Goats is a T thankful addition to a genre that has been obssessed with mak-

ing political statements about the causes and consequences of war, rather than seeking to satirise it.

‘More of this is true than you would you believe’ is the epigraph that introduces Grant Heslov’s reworking of the non-fiction bestseller by Jon Ronson, swiftly followed by General Hopgood (Stephen Lang) running head first into a wall. This laughable realism within the opening sets the tone for the meandering road trip of “Jedi” warrior Lyn Cassidy (George Clooney) and his companion, small town journalist Bob Wilton (Ewan McGregor).

The film delves into the bizarre paranormal experiments of the US Army, led by Bill Django ( Jeff Bridges), the hippy commanding

WHY, WHAT A BIG...OEUVRE YOU HAVE, MR KEATS: Fanny Brawne was living up to her name absorbed and caught up in its web.

Keats’ poetry is used throughout, underlying the strife of the characters as well as bringing them together. It is in an attempt to understand Mr Keats through his poetry that Fanny’s love develops, yet it is his penniless living that holds the two apart.

The film is as subtle and unflinching as the love itself, based on Keats' articulate and emotional love letters to Brawne.Campion cerofficer, mocking Bridges' journey of self-discovery through the typical sixties peace and love sequences.

While the film is punctuated by the laugh out loud actions of both Clooney and Bridges, it fails to drive the movie forward. The film is sidelined by the slushy narration of McGregor’s wide-eyed small town boy, whose aim is merely to get a story. However, lack of experience sees him follow Clooney’s character round like an annoying child, whose quick-fix journey of self-discovery does nothing. It is the contrast of the serious, sentimentalised message and the desire to highlight the absurd which leave the film directionless and the audience lost.

While the big name actors such as Clooney, Bridges, McGregor and Kevin Spacey do shine, their presence leaves the film full of glimmers of what might have been.

It would have benefited more from not stressing the serious subject matter, and instead exposing its shortcomings.

Alexandrea Pike

The Muppet Christmas Carol (1992) As brilliant now as it was when we were six, and perhaps the only Christmas film watchable all year round. Many have tried to bring Charles Dickens' classic to the screen, but none of them have quite succeeded in the same way the Muppets have done. Warm and fuzzy without being sacchrine or overly-sentimental, Kermit and Miss Piggy as are predictably brilliant as the Cratchets, as is Michael Caine as Scrooge.

Kim Maclaughlan & Dan Nicholson-Heap

WTF?: The goat was wondering why Hitler was eying him up

tainly does justice to the historical romance, showing the euphoria of a passionate love laced with agony without turning it into a circus of clichés, and evoking a more emotional response in the process.

It is unashamedly romantic and the lover of action movies would perhaps find Bright Star slow and directionless. The film does not lead up to any obvious climax, with the pace steadily slowing to a halt rather than an

adrenalin fuelled ending.

A cynic could complain that it ends without resolve, abruptly even. However criticisms such as these are irrelevant. This is an intimate portrait of two literary lovers, not a formulaic blockbuster.

And for the story it is, it works beautifully.

Summer Crombie

ERR ...NO: Scrooge wasn't all that keen on gay-ghost BDSM

A CHRISTMAS CAROL DIRECTED BY ROBERT ZEMECKI 

nother year, another contrived A and premature lashing of cinematic Christmas cheer, this time

in the form of Robert Zemecki’s animated adaptation of Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol. If we are to be subjected to yet another retelling of Scrooge’s visit from the Ghost of Christmas Past, audiences should be assured that it has been approached in an original way. At least Jim Henson’s Muppets back in 1992 managed to bring some razzle-dazzle to the tale, and for the little fluffy fellows, managed to have a strangely humanising effect too.

It is a shame that the same cannot be said about this trite serving of yuletide nonsense. Zemecki has managed to capture the well-loved tale in motion picture animation, which is available in both 2D and

3D, and is hell bent on packing in every single didactic Christmas motif one could possibly think of.

Digital imagery is created from real life action performer, just as in the Christmas Fairytale The Polar Express, and Zemecki’s Beowulf. Jim Carrey plays Scrooge as an old man, a happy young apprentice, a wee seven year old boy, and many of the ghosts too. The performance offered

by Carrey is workable enough, with enough variation in tone and voice.

In spite of, rather than because of, this digital bravado, one is left with the feeling that the tale of the humanisation of Scrooge is not enough as it stands to provide children and adults alike with satisfactory entertainment. Instead of the film revelling in potential moments of poignancy, an audience will all of a sudden be whooshed through the chimneys, hoping that the visually stunning views will distract us from a distinct lack of compassion in the tale. But hey, maybe the kids will like it.

Bob Bootstrap

Tuesday November 10 2009 studentnewspaper.org

music@studentnewspaper.org

18 Review

Music Wale Attention Deficit INterscope



H

e’d been doing the rounds for a while by then, but when Washington D.C.’s golden boy rapper Wale dropped his Seinfeld-themed Mixtape About Nothing in 2008, it could have been seen as a true masterstroke. Despite his radio-friendly flow and swagger, the quirkiness and obvious talent underpinning the set of tracks immediately endeared him to the cooler-than-thou Pitchfork indie set. It’s a similar tightrope that Wale walks throughout Attention Def icit, his debut album proper.

The record opens with a stellar beat from TV On The Radio’s David Sitek, but still has room for a charting single featuring Lady Gaga on the mildly irritating sing-song hook. This strain between two opposing directions keeps the album interesting and, more importantly perhaps, so compulsively listenable.

It’s reminiscent of Kanye West’s debut The College Droupout due to the manner in which it strives so convincingly and successfully for

Weezer

both populism and genuine credibility.

The aforementioned diva-aided single might simply seem to consent to radio on first hearing, but the bombast and detail of the beat, not to mention Wale’s enthralling flow and rhymes, prevent it from being any such thing. Similarly, 'World Tour' and 'Pretty Girls' both possess strident piano and fanfare-laden beats with enough clout to keep them as grounded as possible in the realm of the extremely danceable. When Wale dials down the intensity and indulges his more left-field tendencies it works too: 'Prescription' coasts by on a jazzy flute sample while Wale and southern hip-hop iconoclast Bun B voice a diatribe against their fake peers over a snaking guitar backdrop on the Mark Ronson-produced 'Mirrors'. Elsewhere, Wale expands his lyrical palette beyond cutting battle rhymes and focuses on darker fare like suicide ('Contemplate'), drug addiction and even eating disorders ('90210'). While Wale’s less fun side can become a little cloying, this album is certainly worth checking out as one of the most fulfilling commercial hip-hop albums in recent memory.

Raditude Geffen



Michael Russam

julian casablancas Phrazes for the Young rough trade



early four N years since his band’s last release, Strokes frontman Julian Casablancas returns to the limelight with this

solo project.

And what a return it is! Phrazes is haunting and dirgelike, swooping and delirious, a fascinating departure from the regimented angular format of Is This It? or the machinated extravagance of First Impressions. ‘Out of the Blue’ opens the gambit with a driving guitar looming out of an oscillating, eerie web of cacophony and building to a triumphant chorus: "So I may be going to hell in a purple basket," sings Casablancas, "But I’ll be in another world while you’re pissin’ on my casket."

Lead single ‘11th Dimension’

Singles Jason Derulo What You Say Warner bros

 Whenever I hear the Auto-Tune on a track, my mind is stuck on those brilliant Auto-Tune the News sequences that hit YouTube this year. Consequently, modern r’n’b sounds stale. DeRulo’s just turned twenty. The influence of Lil Wayne is found in the macho middle eight rap which spoils the song even if it ticks the boxes of the target demographic. The lyrics are something about the roof falling in and wanting another chance, themes dealt with often enough in pop and r’n’b. He’s got a decent voice and could be the credible, non-GBH-ing Chris Brown that American youth need as a respectable role model. The best thing the tune does is divert you to the song it samples; Imogen Heap's ‘Hide and Seek’ has sublime a cappella.

DeRulo does use the sample well and the beat isn’t too rudimentary. Promising.

fuses an electronic and vaguely Latin beat with a brashly clamouring wall of pan-synths. ‘4 Chords of the Apocalypse’ is heartfelt gospel, testament to sensational vocal range, lyrically mature and bittersweet. ‘Ludlow Street’ laments the prevalence of yuppie culture accompanied by banjos and a waltz-step that conjures Shane MacGowan’s toothless sneer. ‘Glass’ is heroically intricate with an arena-rock solo section emulating Bach’s arpeggios while ‘Tourist’ swaggers with JohnBonham-abandon, twinkling with harpsichords and snarling with sitars.

Unfettered by the Strokes’ formula, Casablancas’ is utterly confident in a myriad of styles, liberally borrowing everything from 80s pop to modern electronica, preaching on a podium miles from his monotonous debut.

A refreshingly original, bitingly personal and skillfully written album.

In its final seconds, Julian hits that note and the trumpets blare and you wonder what took him so long.

Weezer have gone through many different phases. Slowly but surely, lead singer Rivers Cuomo has taken his band from feeling safe ‘In The Garage’ to craving a life in ‘Beverly Hills’. Certainly, latest effort Raditude is the most extroverted we’ve heard the band.

While Raditude is surrounded by its usual dosages of alt rock, there are a few variations such as Easterninfluenced ‘Love Is The Answer’ and hip-hop themed ‘Can’t Stop Partying’ featuring rapper Lil Wayne. Truth is, while the latter song has some of the cheesiest lyrics of all time, it (like every song on the album) has smears of Rivers Cuomo all over it, as the pop hooks dart from ear to ear. Certainly, the cheese doesn’t stop from beginning to end as you can guess from other song titles such as ‘The Girl Got Hot’ and ‘I’m Your Daddy’. Despite the poor quality lyrics you can’t help but warm to the album. The formula that Weezer use is a winner; they have a knack of making everything simple and catchy.

Overall, the album is great collaboration of alternative rock with a pop tendency. The high quality is consistent throughout and there isn’t a song to dislike, although it's probably best to keep an open mind for the songs mentioned above until they've had a chance to win you over. The highlight is ‘Put Me Back Together’, not necessarily a case of lyrical genius, but the song makes sense and the music matches its theme as it builds up to an exciting final two minutes. Fans of the first two albums may find this a difficult listen, but Weezer are definitely rid of their ‘awkward’ phase, and over the last few years they have returned to releasing quality music once again.

Will Lyon

Mike Strizic

Britney Spears

Jamie Cullum

3

I'm All Over It

Jive

t’s safe to say I1994that since their debut album,

Decca





Why does a woman 28 next month need a second greatest hits collection? Child support, perhaps. Ms Spears hit number one in America last month with the collection’s token new song, written with Max Martin who wrote ‘...Baby One More Time’. Some gorgeous modality changes (verse is major, chorus is minor, the whole is boppable) and the throbbing synths aid the staccato one-note chorus and clone-snogging harmonies which were wasted on 'Womanizer.' The namecheck of Peter, Paul and Mary could signal a new direction for Britney as the new Dolly Parton; there’s a great string quartet or a hoe-down version to be made. What does ‘three’ mean, though? There’s a sexual moan at the end of the chorus which may hint at it but this is grown-up pop that, had it been her first single, would be just as well-received as '...Baby'. For what it’s worth, it’s better than Lady Gaga.

The jazz Frodo is back and all over middle-class media to promote his new record The Pursuit. The full-on pop direction Cullum has been hinting at all decade has materialised with Wells’ shower of commercialism. Here, on the LP’s lead single, it’s one part jazz to nine parts modern pop. Jazzy runs mix with some glorious pop chord progressions, including one of the finest choruses of the year.

Crooning something about a girl being "like a melody like I try to forget but I can’t" he strikes the heart of the great pop subject: love as insatiable creature. Cullum himself has a melody; he’s marrying model Sophie Dahl next year.

Cullum is in danger of becoming Robbie Williams for the oinophiles, providing decent modal jazz-influenced ditties for the digital age. [ Jonny Brick]

Don't go anywhere without your iPod? music@studentnewspaper.org

Tuesday November 10 2009 studentnewspaper.org

Review 19

Live

IDLEWILD Wednesday 4th November HMV PICTURE HOUSE

 ince Edinburgh’s favourite sons S played the opening gig at the Picture House last September in triumphant

fashion, Idlewild have evidently had a very busy 14 months. In that time they have completed a UK tour, played a series of five gigs in Glasgow consecutively running through each of their studio albums, pursued various solo projects and of course recorded brand new album Post Electric Blues, which this current tour is designed to showcase.

So busy were they in fact that lead singer Roddy Woomble apparently hasn’t found the time to have a shave. As the band take to the stage, Woomble is seen sporting a beard somewhere between Che Guevara and Stig of the Dump.

With the crowd on the brink of hysteria Stig and co. launch into ‘Younger Than America’, the rousing opener from their new album, only for it to fall spectacularly flat, as guitarist Allan Stewart’s amp fails to work, leaving the rest of the band to struggle through amid the frantic unplugging of cables and switching of guitars. Woomble apologises for the FORTIFIED SESSIONS Friday 30th October GLASGOW SCHOOL OF ART



lectric Eliminators’ brainchild E Fortified Sessions has reached a whopping three years of age. As their

dedicated promoter Gordon will be the first to admit, the educative process of bringing innovative sounds to the kids is not the most lucrative task, but EE have stuck with the game through thick and thin - and what results.

Casting the mind back for a second to an early show featuring DJ Distance

and Gravious at the Bongo Club in 2006, the contrast between that lonely dancefloor and tonight’s asylum is staggering.

Back to the present in any case - this is the first time Scotland has seen Joker and Silkie as a dual entity. Joker’s production has enough character to sink a ship - synth stabs and intoxicating melodies prevail - so Silkie’s subtler, dubbier style brings something special to the table, making for a hypnotic set. Although it is the phat Joker hits ‘3KLane’ and ‘Digidesign’ which get the wildest crowd response, knowingly inserted alongside the obligatory wob-

Wednesday 11th November, Teviot

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In association with:

blin’ hype tunes towards their finale, the set is an idiosyncratic and thoroughly arousing whole. The legendary El-B’s rightful title as dubstep pioneer is often ignorantly attributed to the scene’s later prodigies Skream and Benga, but this guy was among those to rear the sound from the darker end of the garage scene. Naturally, he plays a helluva lot of darkside garage, but it seems that those who came expecting hardcore wobble are perplexed and the dancefloor initially fractures in bafflement.

Fortunately, the more open-minded punters throw themselves into this

false start, but the band seem rocked and subsequent songs feel somewhat shaky.

Only once they fall back on old favourites ‘Paint Nothing’ and ‘Captain’, met with riotous appreciation from the crowd, do Idlewild begin to settle themselves and give the sort of mesmerising performance that they are so capable of.

The rest of the set list is a real showcase of the band’s undoubted ability, utilising the full range of their diverse back catalogue.

Crowd pleasers such ‘American English’ and ‘El Capitain’ have everyone singing along, whereas lesser known gems ‘Future Works’ and the exquisite ‘Quiet Crown’ offer something to the hardcore fans. The relaxed atmosphere is typified when, in typical fashion, Roddy attempts some banter with the crowd, only to receive some good-natured grief about his new facial hair style.

By the time ‘Too Long Awake’ perfectly caps off an extended encore no one is thinking about the technical hitches that threatened to de-rail the performance. In this gig Idlewild have proven themselves to be a professional but simultaneously exciting band, one that the people of Edinburgh should cherish as their own.

Buster Stonham sonic territory which until now has received relatively little attention, perhaps due to the Scottish homegrown sound’s wonkier identity. Ultimately though, even the wobble fans are gratified by the more obvious dubstep overtones of tunes like ‘Think You’re Greezy’. What is in hindsight a pretty brave move promotionally goes down a storm, and all that is left is to wish a happy birthday to Fortified Sessions.

Rosie McLean

My iPod Playlist,

by Dr David Nutt Here, the Music Editors make a frankly forlorn attempt at satirical humour by pretending that the Government's newly ex-drugs-advisor was given the sack because he was some sort of idiot stoner who loved to smoke that sweet dank all day. In fact, his only crime was to make a principled stand for evidence-based policy-making at a time when the vogue is for policy-based evidencemaking. We're sorry.

1. 'Hits from the Bong' by Cypress Hill. D-Nutt says: "This is a classic stoner song! I especially love how you hear the sound of bubbling at the very beginning - best sound in the world. I bet it was a real bong they were smoking in the recording studio too! Those guys were way too cool."

2. 'No Woman No Cry' by Bob. "Bob Marley is my hero. That's why I just call him Bob, to show how connected to him I feel. I listen to this song when I just want to relax with some close friends. I'll take some time cooking up a great meal for us, then we'll drink some wine and fire up my killer new £800 vaporiser. Certified good times - every time."

3. The entire Pink Floyd back catalogue. "Non-Pink-Floyd music's great and everything, but sometimes you just have to listen to every song Pink Floyd ever recorded to get into that special place - with the help of Mary Jane, of course. Dub versions of Pink Floyd albums are also very effective, and are sure to impress your friends."

4. 'Rainy Day Women #12 and 35'

by Bob. "Great tune, and not only because the chorus is 'Everybody must get stoned' - which is awesome! The line 'They’ll stone ya and then they’ll say good luck' reminds me of the totally unfair way I was treated by the Man. This song was there to help me put things back together. (Like Bob Marley, I just call Bob Dylan, Bob.)" 5. 'Smoke Two Joints' by Sublime.

"This is a song with an important message: don't worry about stuff, just get high. Sometimes when I was working for the Man and people were getting on my back about reports and deadlines and stuff, I'd play them this song. Then I'd produce two joints from my jacket pocket and go 'da-nah!'. Then we'd all get super high. I loved my job and I want it back."

Tuesday November 10 2009 studentnewspaper.org

Addicted to the box? Email: tv@studentnewspaper.org

20 Review

TV Everybody's got the Spooks

Harrison Kelly gives us the brief on the new series of the MI5 drama

E

leven months is a long time to stay bundled in the boot of a car, but not for Sir Harry Pierce, MI5’s chief counter-terrorism officer, who this week escaped back onto our screens in BBC One’s Spooks.

The first episode of series eight saw Harry (Peter Firth) at the centre of a mission to return him to Thames House after being kidnapped in an operation against the Russians last year.

The cushion-chewing season finale of last year was picked up with the same pace that makes Spooks one of the best dramas on television. What makes it so unique are the storylines; they are relevant and real. Written by Edinburgh Traverse Theatre’s own Zinnie Harris and Ben Richardson the plots incorporate contemporary fears and mirror the headlines so closely and with such authenticity one does wonder if Harris and Richardson are covert agents themselves.

This series sees the return of Ruth Evershed played by Nicola Walker, which will be good news to those who miss her restrained middle-aged love affair with Harry.

Ruth was forced to leave the grid and fake her own death a few years ago after being accused of fraternising with terrorists.

The abnormally high turnover of officers at MI5 adds to the realism of the show - unlike James Bond, the leading characters are not eternal and do actually die. This helps to keep the show fresh and annoy my girlfriend, who points at nearly every BBC drama saying: “I am sure she used to be in Spooks,

SPOOKS DRINKING GAME Drink when: • A "spook" meets up with someone from the CIA with a highly dubious American accent • An exchange of information is made in an extremely slick and ultimately impractical way • Roz, Lucas and Harry spend a good few minutes setting up and explaining the plot - and you still haven't got a clue what's going on • Malcolm makes MI5's job a whole lot easier through some unexplained function of his computer • After a long hard day, Harry gets his whisky out (down your drink if he plays classical music at the same time) • You can guess at which exact moment the screen freezes and zips up before the end credits

MI HIGH-FIVE:Jesus, guys. I know you're ice-cold spies, but it wouldn't hurt to smile once in a while she got shot by the Iranians.”

Despite the drop-kick, gunwielding, high adrenaline force of the programme, it refuses to have a particular target audience. Young or old, male or female everyone gets the Spooks. I know my mum with her dressing gown and cocoa is as much of a fan as me, with my dressing gown and cocoa.

The tough-talking and moody

27TH NOVEMBER Celebrate Thanksgiving at Teviot with all the Traditional Trimmings.

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stances at the end of scenes are cool, the guns are cool and Malcolm is the don. Everybody needs a Malcolm at the end of the phone.

I do wonder however if the show has a "CSI effect" on its viewers.

What is a "CSI effect" you say?

Well, keep reading. According to Wikipedia, the "CSI effect" "is a reference to the phenomenon of popular television shows such as the

CSI franchise raising crime victims' and jury members', even criminals', real-world expectations of forensic science." Perhaps by watching Spooks we are getting unrealistic views of what MI5 actually does.

We all want to be MI5 agents after watching the show, but in reality it could turn out to be a hell of a lot of waiting around in blacked-out cars.

Notice on Spooks they only have to

wait ten seconds - funny that.

On the other hand we, the viewing public, have been subject to the high-octane James Bond from MI6 for many years and now comes along Spooks with its realistic storylines, human emotion and lower budget challenging our ideas of the intelligence service altogether. Perhaps that is the real "CSI effect".

Predictions for this series include Malcolm returning from retirement, a younger male agent that upsets Lucas but excites Jo and a whole lot of talking whilst holding your ear. Long live Spooks - now where is that application form...?

Michael Jackson: the live séance

Paddy Douglas watches Derek Acorah work his magic on the "King of Pop"

L

ate, on Friday evening on Sky1, Michael Jackon returned from the spirit world. He did so to tell the world that what tabloid journalists have been writing about him all these years is completely untrue, and that he loves his fans very, very much. To the skeptic this may sound highly unlikely, so thank the Lord the King of Pop's energy was channelled through Derek Acorah, the UK's best known and most hilarious psychic, whose single earring and thick Scouse accent ensures a comforting and trustworthy presence.

To help us along this foray into another dimension we had the wonderfully asinine company of June Sarpong, who was presumably paid thousands for the simple role of responding to every one of Acorah's statements with a barely credible "really?" or "wow!" The other half of the presenting team was Michael's supposed best friend David Gest, Liza Minelli's former husband, who made his name through his terrifying use of plastic surgery and reality TV shows to further his career.

The bizarre events started before the séance had even begun: Gest used his first few words to mount an exceedingly creepy come-on to Sarpong: "I just have to tell you, you have the most beautiful lips and the prettiest white teeth I have ever seen in my

life." When words like that come from the mouth of a fifty-five year old man sporting red hair and a hoody covered in glittery skulls, you know it's going to be a weird hour of television.

Unfortunately, it wasn't nearly as entertaining as the concept suggested.

When embodied by Jackson's spirit Acorah spouted the kind of vague nonsense he's famous for, and the die-hard fans, who had been gathered round the table in full Jackson get-up, gave overwrought reactions that seemed just a little too serious to laugh at openly.

My first instinct was to guffaw at the stupidity of these idiots, but soon that feeling turned to a sort of sympathy.

These people have been set up by a con-

man and a multi-million corporation to look like utter buffoons on national television. Should we really be mocking them?

This, it seems, is the ultimate reality TV show: we have the exploitation of the borderline mentally ill, an obsession with fame, a central concept that's a little too barmy for it's own good, and David Gest, the definition of a D-list celebrity. The show is a sad indictment of the creative merits of Sky1, and just goes to show how greedy and tasteless TV execs can be when given the chance.

MJ: Michael Jackson was a big fan of Winston Churchill. Fact

Want to write for us? Attach a badger to some ball lightning and send it to: tech@studentnewspaper.org

Tuesday November 10 2009 studentnewspaper.org

Review 21

TECHNOLOGY

Gentlemen, Scribble your Nauts

Alan Williamson scrutinises the fruit of a drunken liaison between a DS and a dictionary SCRIBBLENAUTS Nintendo DS £24.99 WARNER BROS

 yperbole is a remarkable thing, H especially in the world of computer games. We’re all so anxious

that our expensive black box is better than another’s expensive white box, proclaiming new titles as the second coming of Christ. Or in the case of Scribblenauts, the game where you can create anything, it’s the second creation of Christ. Watch him fight a dragon, give him a pirate hat, tie him to a helicopter or feed him a hotdog: the possibilities are endless. Few games have been so hyped, subject to gushing praise and spurious claims that they will revolutionise entertainment.

This is a game in which, if you believe the propaganda on the back of the box, you can write anything and solve everything. Although that should really be 'tap anything' since the handwriting recognition is terrible, causing you to jumble upper and lower case letters like a confused teenager’s internet screen name. There are an alleged 20,000 objects from which to choose, from aardvark to zebu and everything in between. This makes for an astonishing ten minutes

DOODLEBUG: The possibilities are endless, but the fun definitely has a limit in the main menu, dishing out free pickles and riding around on Pegasus.

Everything you can imagine is there - or at least a rough approximation of it. However, there comes a time when you want to stop stretching Mario’s nose and get on with the damn game!

At this point, there are plenty of ob-

stacles in the way of enjoying yourself.

It is clear that the controls are broken in a game when getting through the (agonisingly long and largely irrelevant) tutorial requires a Herculean effort. The stylus controls everything from movement to object interactions and fails miserably at

the task. Instead of giving objects to people, you’ll hurl them like missiles.

Instead of picking up a rock, you’ll jump off a cliff. Instead of finishing the challenges, you’ll turn the DS off and go read a book. It doesn’t help that the characters, including the protagonist Maxwell, flap around the environ-

ments like they’re held together at the joints by drawing pins. They are twodimensional in both senses, lacking in character and common sense.

Let’s not forget that this is a computer game, and consequently there must be several hundred arbitrary challenges to complete.

In Scribblenauts these take the form of puzzles, which you complete for ‘ollars’. Ollars buy new puzzles and random tat in the obligatory in-game shop. Forgive my lack of enthusiasm, but it’s hardly the most imaginative of setups. Your imagination may be limitless, but solutions to the puzzles are finite and most of my ideas were fruitless. Objects just don’t behave the way you would expect (unless builders actually dig by swinging pneumatic drills like shovels) and any attempt to think logically is swiftly thwarted.

What is the point of Scribblenauts: to slog through generic situations and see just how many nouns you know, or to instigate a fight between God and Cthulhu? It is a fantastically fun sandbox, but a tragically flawed game.

You sense that the developers created this amazing framework full of innovation, humour and sheer vastness of content, then hastily slapped on a collection of half-baked game mechanics at the last minute. If that’s the limit of their collective imagination, what hope is there for the rest of us?

Deus ex machina

Gordon McLean investigates human attitudes toward AI

ast week I had dinner with a close L friend. Whenever we meet the conversation inevitably makes its way

into cyberspace: he invented a popular programming language. Previously we had both agreed that computers were merely glorified watches and that artificial intelligence was just a compensatory fantasy of lonely school children with naught but C64s to keep them company.

No longer.

Over the last year he has seen countless examples of technology which is ‘almost there’. With quantum computing’s difficult labour almost over, he is certain that the marriage of software and hardware necessary to give birth to AI is perilously close, something we both steadfastly agree should never be tampered with. As a Humanist, he fears The Terminator; as a Christian, I fear having to endure another sequel to The Matrix.

Artificial Intelligence famously came into the collective global conscious in 1968 with Kubrick’s 2001: A Space Odyssey. Set in the then future, its famous jump-cut sequence from Apes to HAL 9000 explicates an idea long held by those in AI - namely that sentient machines are merely the next step in the evolutionary process. HAL 9000 is the brain and central nervous system of a ship on a space odyssey to find the origins of man. However, en route it has a psychotic breakdown and goes on a killing spree leaving Captain Dave no choice but to ‘murder’ him by

ripping out his mainframe circuitry.

In one of the greatest sequences in movie history, we hear a computer begging for its life, declaring itself to be afraid before finally descending into poetic rambling during its death throes. Kubrick’s artistic prescience was prophetic: AI programmers working at the forefront of distributed programming have noted how chillingly human their programs output becomes when they are slowly ‘executed’, mimicking HAL's and our own behaviour unnervingly.

The Terminator franchise developed this theme further. Here intelligent machines were the custodians of Hell, a species which at some undefined point turned on its creator with the same contemptuous gesture enacted by Homo sapiens on Homo heidelbergensis or Lucifer on God Almighty. This is where my friend and I differ: he is an evolutionary cognitivist who fears this scenario; I am a psychoanalytic realist who merely sees this as the nightmares of our collective unconscious projected safely onto the big screen. Our difference on this point belies the main criticism of AI held by many philosophers: identifying an arbitrary axiomatic system to describe what we know thus far about the observable facets of sentient life does not garner us with a divine creativity to then afford ourselves techno-progeny in mock humility.

Perhaps this is why no machine has yet passed Turing’s famous test of

recognisably ‘human’ behaviour.

If The Terminator gives us psychoanalytic hell, The Matrix offers us theological salvation. Here we are offered a saviour in the form of Neo, a human who must ultimately sacrifice himself to the machines in order to break the existential rubric generated by their parasitic sub-programs. Neo is The Terminator’s counterpoint, and the fundamental reason why I believe AI is never going to happen. In the two seconds before his cyber-crucifixion, we see and hear every kilojoule of energy in the universe pass through his dying body, illustrating the fundamental contradiction of cognitive-based AI and the atheistic position itself: we’re not smart enough to solve certain problems, but we’re smart enough to build machines that can, only we could never therefore understand the solution anyway. AI ultimately seeks to wrench the padlock open on Pandora’s box with blunt butter knives.

In 1968 Martin Caidin released a novel of the ages. In The God Machine he told the story of Steve Rand, a cybertechnician desperately trying to stop a secret government computer destroying mankind. In doing so he stumbled upon a truth known to artists since Aristotle’s observation that pulling God from the machine is never really a satisfying way to end our human story.

WORLD CLASS STUDY/ LONDON POSTGRADUATE INFORMATION SESSION IN EDINBURGH Representatives from the four leading research universities in London will be holding a presentation followed by an exhibition offering information, advice and guidance to prospective postgraduate students and applicants in Edinburgh.

Postgraduate Study in London Thursday 19 November 2009 Presentation 18.30 – 19.30 Exhibition open 19.30 – 21.00 Venue: The Biosphere, Our Dynamic Earth, Holyrood Road, EH8 8AS Book a place at www.lse.ac.uk/studentrecruitment

www.imperial.ac.uk

www.lse.ac.uk

www.kcl.ac.uk

www.ucl.ac.uk

Puzzles

Goliath says:

Fee fi fo fum, I smell the blood of an Englishman."

Nikolai Valuev talks tough prior to Sunday's big fight. He lost.

Puzzles

The Student Crossword #9

Solutions

Sudoku #9

ACROSS

Sudoku is a logic-based number-placement puzzle. The objective is to fill the 9×9 grid so that each column, each row, and each of the nine 3×3 boxes (also called blocks or regions) contains the digits from 1 to 9 only once.

The object of Hitori is to eliminate numbers by shading in the squares such that remaining cells do not contain numbers that appear more than once in either a given row or column. Filled-in cells cannot be horizontally or vertically adjacent, although they can be diagonally adjacent. The remaining un-filled cells must form a single component (i.e there must be no isolated numbers

DOWN

26. Cope (4,2) 28. Mel Gibson's heart?! (5) 32. ..., humbug (3)

ANDY PANDA

17. Commerce (5) 19. Organ of hearing (3) 20. Swiss city (6) 21. Join together (6) 23. Profound (4) 24. Lift forcefully (7) 25. Weirder (6)

SUDOKU

Hitori #9

CROSSWORD

HITORI

1. Lazy, unenthusiastic (13) 8. Division of a book (7) 10. Reception room (7) 12. Subsided (6) 13. Frozen dessert (3,5) 15. Numerical fact (9) 18. Medium of exchange (5) 21. Leash (5) 22. Exciting experience (9) 27. Set free (8) 29. One or the other of two (6) 30. Blunder (7) 31. Garden vegetable (7) 33. State in SE Australia (3,5,5)

2. State of USA (7) 3. Equipment (3) 4. Hangs around in Bristo Square (6) 5. Got up (5) 6. Saline component of the hydrosphere (6) 7. One of the seven dwarves (6) 9. First-born (6) 11. High fidelity (2-2) 14. Perch (5) 16. Small child (3)

“

SCOTT MAHONY

Got your eye on the ball? Email sport@studentnewspaper.org

Tuesday Novermber 10 2009 studentnewspaper.org

Sport 23

Ireland and Wales set to blossom

Michael Mawdsley discusses the prospect of the home nations in the autumn internationals t is the time of year again when Ihemispheres the Southern and Northern scrum-down in a intense

three week period of all-out rugby, offering the home nations the final chance to test their prospective sides ahead of the Six Nations in February and March. How honest a reflection this is of the future teams is debatable, but, regardless, the opportunity for fast-flowing inter-continental rugby is a prospect that will have any rugby fan dribbling at the mouth.

England go into the tests with arguably their most experimental squad under Martin Johnson, without half of their first-choice team, due predominantly to injury. Indeed, in a managerial career filled with pitfalls and bad luck, this is the first time Johnson has an England squad that perhaps will retain a modicum of stability and a vague element of himself, after his own admission during the week that last year's squad was 'like a group of 30 men thrown together.' The return of Lewis Moody, Steve Thompson and the unforgettable Johnny Wilkinson gives a 'spirit of 2003' to a new-look squad and a huge boost in both morale and experience, whilst young and upcoming stars such as Courtney Lawes provide a fresh impetus. The inclusion of Wilkinson gives the important buzz, and it is perhaps the biggest fear factor to any opposing side seeing him in the tunnel beside them. Whatever can be said of his injury-strewn career, he is still the player who won England the world cup, the icon of modern English rugby, cemented in the top ten fly-halves in the world as both a playmaker and a footballer. Apart from Wilkinson’s return the potential of the team is only enhanced by the Leicester back-row of Moody, Crane and Croft, ably supported off the bench by James Haskell. Where Moody provides experience, first-cap Crane and Croft provide fresh power and menace both in open play and in the contact area, invariably breaching the gain-line at all times - a must in modern rugby. An experimental front-row appears obvious, with inexperienced David Wilson propping down beside Tim Payne of Wasps, a contrast to the mountain of Sheridan.

The backs are awash with pace with Shane Geraghty, Northampton Saints ten, sure to shine after being granted his first start, offering another creative option besides Wilkinson. Arguably this new England team could enjoy a successful autumn. Argentina should be easily enough dismissed, but after the defeat to Australia at the weekend, it remains to be seen as to whether England can compete with the best.

Scotland are yet to be seen as an effective force on the international stage.

A squad picked, in the words of Andy Robinson, on a 'basis of current form', it it seems to promise the fresh kickstart a failing Scotland team needed.

Up for debate however is the inclusion of one recognized fly-half within the squad, Phil Godman, and the reliance upon Chris Paterson as a replacement.

While Phil Godman is the best fly-half in Scotland, history has proved he is unreliable and lacklustre at points, in contrast to Dan Parks, who has played his heart out for Glasgow this season, following the controversies of the past six months. The failure to

include Parks in the squad appears to be an error, a chance wasted for a form player. The reliance on Paterson, who when playing at ten fails to provide a marginality of impact, is also unwise.

Arguably Paterson should not start in the autumn internationals, being a one-trick-kicking-past-his-peak-pony.

Scotland’s squad has the potential to have a solid autumn, but the failings in the centre and the lack of options at fly-half might condemn them.

Wales and Ireland are the best two Northern Hemisphere sides in the world at the moment. The success of last years Six Nations as a competition was down to the fast-flowing rugby of Brian O’Driscoll and Ryan Jones. The truth is, if any of the Home Nations are going to compete with the pace and power of South Africa, New Zealand and Australia, it is Ireland, as Six Nation Grand Slam champions, who have the serious potential. Having had 14 members in the Lions Squad, Ireland, under the stewardship of the genius Brian O’Driscoll, play a rapid and attractive form of rugby, due to the

play-making abilities of Ronan O’Gara combined with one of the best packs ever to play international rugby.

However, their squad for the autumn tests is quite experimental. The inclusion of nine new uncapped players is a testament to Declan Kidney's desire to build, and in Chris Henry, the Ulster number eight, there is potential from some serious bruising in the forwards.

In the backs, Ian Humphreys, younger brother of legendary Ulster ten David, also looks set to shine in an Ireland side entirely capable of greater successes.

Wales are in much the same position.

With their best back-row internationally for a long time, including Ryan Jones and Martyn Williams, they have the power to nullify any attacking options, rendering Dan Carter and co. ineffectual. Complete with the best secondrow in the world, Alun Wyn-Jones, the Welsh pack is something to be feared rather than bullied. In the backs, Shane Williams is a pint-sized points machine, and with the right men on the inside, they will tear sides asunder.

HERO OF 2003: Johnny Wilkinson's return to the England squad will give Martin Johnson's players a psychological lift

Edinburgh earn valuable home win Jonny Davis reports from Peffermill as Edinburgh ease to a comfortable win against Watsonians Men's Hockey University of Edinburgh Watsonians

3 0

EDINBURGH MEN’S first team made yet further head way in the National 1 hockey league table last weekend with a confident 3-0 victory over Watsonians. Promotion last season has left Edinburgh eager to establish themselves as a force to be reckoned with in Scotland's top league, and make the cut for the close of the season. As a comfortably beaten Watsonian side would testify, the home side look well on their way to doing just that.

The game began rather tentatively for both sides. The annual club day event at Edinburgh had brought families and students in their masses down to Peffermill. As the headline event of the day, the excitement was

tangible as the first team players took to the pitch, and so too the nerves.

Possession changed hands more frequently than one would expect at such a high level. Passes were misfired, balls were miscontrolled, leaving both sides in mutual frustration. With twenty minutes on the clock, the score remained at 0-0 thanks more than anything to simultaneous errors.

It took a fortunately clumsy Watsonian attack to spark a wide-eyed Edinburgh into life. With a timely intervention by defender Duncan Birse, a counter attack surged forward, putting Andy Campbell into space in the opposition’s half. Some intelligent dribbling led to Edinburgh’s first short corner of the game. To Edinburgh’s, and the crowd’s despair, the short corner broke down at the injection leaving Watsonians relieved to still be level.

The attack appeared to have vitalized the Edinburgh side and suddenly,

passes found their targets, and errors became a rarity.

Edinburgh went on to dominate possession and the best chances of the first half. The university side created their second and third short corners of the game only to force two good saves by the opposition keeper. Watsonians however, were sure to remind Edinburgh that domination is worthless if not converted. In a shock counter attack the away side produced a heartin-mouth moment as a ball was played across an empty goal mouth. Taking heed of this warning the Edinburgh side resumed their domination and seconds before half time striker Paul Heron put away a reverse shot to take the sides in 1-0 at half time.

Edinburgh looked to continue their form into the second half. Yet they suffered an early setback as star of the first half; Fulton was sin binned for an overly physical challenge. Sensing the

opportunity to draw level, Watsonians committed more men forward to make their extra numbers count. Forced back into their own 25, Edinburgh desperately switched back and forth across the back until defender Stephen Morrison threw an audacious 50 meter aerial to pick out forward Patrick Thompson on the top of the ‘D’. Having turned a defender inside-out, Thompson slotted the ball past a shell-shocked opposition keeper, thus signalling the end of the Watsonians fightback.

With the visiting team now short on confidence, Edinburgh chances came thick and fast but it wasn’t until they were restored to full strength that they made it count. After some devastating dribbling by Stuart Ingles, it was Andy Campbell that delivered the coup de grâce in the form of a delicate flick over a flailing goalkeeper and his second of the game. Edinburgh now sit seventh in the ten team league.

Injury Time TAKES A WRY LOOK AT THE WORLD OF SPORT

Is sport above the law?

SPORT HAS always been one part of life that has seemed to escape the grasp of the law. This has been evident throughout the ages, with even Roman law establishing the difference between those that kill with a javelin when practicing the sport, and those that kill with a javelin outwith a designated throwing field. Yet, as eras go by, sport and the law are finding themselves increasingly intertwined.

Obviously, the excuse that you were simply practicing the javelin when it unfortunately found its way into the person on the other side of the field was never going to last in the modern world, despite what the lex Aquilia may say.

Football has also found the law to be a menace, with European Community intervention becoming necessary to bring the sport into accordance with EC Treaty Article 39, concerning the free movement of workers. Beforehand, all clubs had quotas on how many foreign nationals could play for the club at any one time, a rule which gave Leeds United a lifeline in the European Cup after their opponents Stuttgart won the match but the result became invalid after it was found that the German side had fielded too many foreigners.

European intervention eventually led to the Bosman ruling and to quotas being lifted across Europe.

This in itself meant that clubs could now buy all the best players from around Europe, bringing with it the rise in popularity of the new Premiership. This influx of excitement, at the prospect of some of the world's best players playing on home turf, led to investment into the sport, making it more commercially viable.

However, the latest chapter in the law-sport saga has now materialised with the result of the Kevin Keegan and Alan Curbishley cases. Curbishley won his case last week against West Ham United for constructive dismissal, after West Ham United were believed to have committed a fundamental breach of Curbishley’s employment contract.

West Ham’s chairman reportedly sold two key players, Anton Ferdinand and George McCartney, to Premier League outfit Sunderland, without the consent of Curbishley, who was the West Ham manager at the time. This was despite the fact that Curbishley has a clause in his contract stating that he would be the one who had the final say of who was brought into, and sold out of, the football club.

Keegan also faced similar problems with Newcastle and received £2million in damages from the northern side.

So, the law is increasingly part of sport nowadays. It has provided us with the opportunity to watch the best players in the world, while also allowing us to watch the demise of some of the biggest clubs in Britain. Whether its intrusive nature is healthy is debatable, some may claim, but however you look at it, it has still put Marlon King behind bars.

Ed Senior

Sport studentnewspaper.org Tuesday November 10 2009

Home Nations set to shine?

23

Michael Mawdsley takes a look at the Autumn interntationals P

Edinburgh fencers dominate opening fixtures Anthony D'Auria reports on a promising start to the season for the fencing team types of fencing. These are categorised by the separate weapons and rules required for each one. The three types are: Foil, Sabre and Epee. In a university match each team will field three fencers from each weapon for a total of nine fencers (although a single fencer can double up and fence two or three separate weapons). The team matches are thus broken up into three sections that go to 45 points each spread over three fencers (for a total of 135 points).

In Wednesday’s match against Durham the Foil team fenced first.

Over the past few years foil has been

Edinburgh’s weakest weapon (and perhaps Durham’s strongest) as the team has only one full-time foilist (the other two fencers train mostly at epee and sabre). The match got off to a slow start for Edinburgh with the both teams staying fairly even until the fifth bout where Edinburgh took the lead at 25-22 and maintained a convincing margin for the rest of the match as they took the foil 45-30. Next, the epee team performed well as it maintained a significant lead throughout the entire match, finishing it at 45-28. Up last, Edinburgh’s Sabreurs, recently the strongest team,

finished well with a 45-27 point victory for a total of 135-85. Edinburgh’s men's team have been having a solid season so far. Four matches into the year, the team is undefeated and it looks as though it will maintain its position as the number one team in Scotland and finish first in the Northern Premier League. This should give the team a good chance of winning the BUCS this year. Last year Edinburgh tied for third after losing to Cambridge. If the impressive season so far is anything to go by, the fencing team has every reason for optimism.Edinburgh's fencing team compete against

SWORDS AT THE READY: Edinburgh Epee fencer Jamie Firth in action against St. Andrews

four other teams in the Premier North Division and currently sit atop the table on 12 points. Those teams occupying the spots below in the division are the universities of Durham, St. Andrews, Northumbria and Birmingham. Following their first round of fixtures in the Premier Division, Edinburgh have dominated proceedings taking maximum points from their matches. Meanwhile, Durham, St Andrews and Northumbria are locked on three points each and will have everything to play for in their next fixtures to try and clinch second place in the league.

VSEVOLOD KONDRATIEV-POPOV

AFTER A fairly close season last year the University of Edinburgh’s men’s fencing team has now found itself to be perhaps a few steps ahead of the competition.

Last Wednesday the team fenced the first of its two matches against Durham University with excellent results. Edinburgh’s team won by a hefty margin, with a final score of 135-85. For the benefit of those not intimately acquainted with the sport of fencing it would perhaps be apt to include a brief explanation of how it is scored at university level.

First of all, there are three different