THE BOSSY ISSUE I
WELCOME TO ADULTHOOD II SWAGHER SPRING 2021
INDIVIDUAL AND COUPLE CONSULTATIONS
SEXOLOGY AND SOCIOLOGY COURSES
THEGOODELEARNINGEXPERIENCE@GMAIL.COM INFO@NIKKIGSPOT.COM FB: @THEGOODELEARNINGEXPERIENCE, @NIKKIGSPOT, @UNCOVERINGYOUWITHNIKKIG CLUBHOUSE: @NICOLERGOODEMA IG: @NIKKI_GSPOT
SEXOLOGY TUTORIALS AND WORKSHOPS
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SWAGHER ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS Acknowledgments Contributors Kim Cross Kaitlan Darby Anika Ennett Francheska “Fancy” Felder Beverly Johnson Karlyn Leblanc, LMSW Patrice Rivers Tahyira Savanna Chelli Stanley Christina Woodard Marketing Francheska “Fancy” Felder | Editor-In-Chief Jarmel Roberson | VP of Marketing Shanice Ashbey | Marketing Treajour Abrams | Marketing Christina Woodard | Online Editor/Magazine Manager Kennedy Herndon | SwagHer Intern Kaleah Florence | SwagHer Intern Andrew Horton | Copy Editor Francheska “Fancy” Felder | Copy Editor Christina Woodard | Copy Editor Ricardo Santiago of ATHNTK | Layout Design Dwight Howard of ATHNTK | Layout Design
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Meet the Contributors Kim Cross Kim Cross is a veteran, wife, mother of two, and the owner and lead craftswoman at Zhi Bath & Body. IG: @zhibathandbody Kaitlan Darby Kaitlan Darby is a graduate of UL Lafayette. She has a B.A. in Mass Communication with a concentration in Public Relations and a minor in promotional management. She is a publicist, writer, and aspiring actress. She is the founder of Black Mamba Creative, which is her creative arts/ services outlet. Instagram: @blackmambacreative LinkedIn: Kaitlan Darby Website: https://www.blackmambacreative.com Kaitlan Darby
Kim Cross
Beverly Johnson Beverly K. Johnson is a certified Wellness Coach and CEO of Genesys Fitness. GenFit is a safe space where women can transform their mindset, body, and life in a caring and non-judgmental environment. Through candid conversations and fitness training, “forgotten” women are empowered to reclaim their identity and unveil the strength inside by working 1-on-1 with motivational life coach Bev. Website: http://beverlykjohnson.com Instagram: @bevkjohnson
Karlyn LeBlanc
Beverrly K. Johnson
Karlyn LeBlanc Karlyn LeBlanc is a master’s licensed social worker. LeBlanc is the founder of Black Girls Travel Therapy and Dinner with Divas. In addition, she’s a bestselling author and a motivational & professional development speaker. Allison Ashby Hailing from Manhattan, New York, AllisonJanel is a graduate of Saint John’s University, where she majored in Legal Studies with a minor in Court Administration. AllisonJanel is the Owner of AllyKatzAlley & Everyday Accessory Collection, and Founder & CEO of Everything Phenomenally You and AllyJ Media.Additionally, she’s an Influencer, Blogger, Community Volunteer, Legal Consultant, and Licensed Notary in NYS. You can find her on Instagram @chatwitallyJ
Patrice Rivers
Lawrencia Nelson
Patrice Rivers Patrice Rivers is a storyteller born with a vision to write and be creative. With nine books under her belt, she has taken being an author to the next level by creating the book series for children called “Come Learn With Patricia,” which talks about a little girl living with Sickle Cell Disease. An advocate and survivor herself, she is continuing to speak on SCD educating the community. Patrice is also the proud owner of That Riverz Gurl Brand that primarily focuses on her books, writing, and poetry. Learn more by visiting www.thatriverzgurlbrandllc.com or @ thatriverzgurlbrandllc. Tahyira Savanna Tahyira is a lifestyle journalist and writer. Her interest includes human stories and introspection. She interviews everyday people doing their part to make our world a happier place. Follow her on Twitter @TAsterisk and Instagram @iletthegoodtimesroll
Lawrencia Nelson
Tahyira Savanna
Chelli Stanley Chelli Stanley is a multi-racial woman of African, Japanese, and European descent. She is an independent investigative journalist who has traveled widely and volunteered with many initiatives, cultural empowerment, and human rights organizations.
Christina Woodard
Christina Woodard Christina Woodard was born and raised in Baton Rouge, Louisiana. She attended Dillard University in New Orleans, Louisiana, and received a Bachelor of Arts in Mass Communication. She is passionate about all things related to writing, investigation, family, and crime and hopes in the future to put those passions to good use by becoming an attorney. She is currently the Magazine Manager at SwagHer Magazine and Media. You can find her on Instagram @cstina.nicole.
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From The Editor Greetings All, It’s Fancy. I don’t know if it is safe to say we’ve survived a pandemic but hey we are still here. I am finding that while I kind of like the new normal, I’m growing antsy. So putting this issue together was a little difficult. Our original website died. We have a new team behind the scenes. Arnya and I filmed the first season of Theories & Thoughts Deep Dive, our streaming extension of Theories & Thoughts Podcast. So now we are executive producers and on tv. Really, my life is probably moving faster than it has been in a long time. I’m just thankful that I am not one of those who has or will have to reintegrate into a workspace. I am not sure how that would go but all of these have forced me to be a boss. I have to make more decisions and delegate a lot more, but I also have had to roll up my sleeves to pick up the slack and swallow my anxiety and fears when overseeing projects and my team. I now see the importance of seeing things to completion much sooner because you never know what may happen. From Fancy with Love
I Cover III Acknowledgements IV Meet the Contributors
V From the Editor IV Table of Contents
CONTENTS
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01 Business
14 Self-care
04 Spotlight
16 Bossy
06
19
Pressures of the Pandemic Birthed Entrepreneurs Author Anika recalls how many entrepreneurs were birthed during the pandemic.
Author Spotlight: RL Clark
Entertainment
The Best Black Sitcoms That Taught Us About Life Christina lists the best Black sitcoms with life lessons. See if your fav made the list!
09 Bossy
Bossy Woman Brenda Pratt Bossy woman feature, Brenda Pratt dishes on her baby Brenda’s Editorial Services.
11 Spotlight
Attya Guiles SwagHer spotlights CEO of the ATTYYA Limited Co, Attya Guiles.
Simple Self Care for the Five Senses Craftswoman Kim Cross shares simple self-care tips using the five senses.
Bossy Woman Brandi Davis
Entertainment
One Night in Miami is Film Designed to Spark Conversations Tahyira gives her take on the film.
20 MANdatory
MANdatory Awareness: Pastor Dantwan Broady Meet MANdatory Awareness feature Pastor Dantwan Broady
23 Mental Health
Mental Health of Black Officers at Stake The death of Clyde Kerr III sheds light on the mental health of Black officers.
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26 Cover Story She’s A Boss: Nicole Waters
30 Fashion
42 Travel
53 Business
32 Health
44 Meet
54 Meet
It’s the earrings for me! Spring style!
Missing Pieces Christina paints a picture of living with MRKH.
34 Meet
Nicole R. Goode The People’s Intellectual
39 Bossy
Rhonda Anita SwagHer chats with Award Winning and 2x International Best Selling Author and domestic violence overcomer Rhonda Anita.
Traveling is Therapy Karlyn compares traveling to therapy.
Life Coach Dr. Carlene Randolph
67 Fitness
Fix my F.U.P.A. Coach Bev shares tips to fix your F.U.P.A.
50 Spotlight
Latosha Donaby SwagHer spotlights medical professional and actress Latosha Donaby.
On Clubhouse Yet? Patrice explores the benefits of Clubhouse for business owners.
We Interrupt Your Programming Meet the SwagHer Correspondents Team
56 Finances
10 Steps to Develop a Money Mindset Level up!
57 News
Jussie Smollett and the MAGA Hat that Never Was Were we too quick to judge Jussie Smollett? New details.
58 Love
Closure is overrated
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“CHANGE YOUR MINDSET, CHANGE YOUR LIFE”
STRIPPED TO MY TRUTH: UNPACKING THE EMOTIONAL BAGGAGE Micaela “Cae” Thomas
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THE BOSSY ISSUE 1
Pressures of the Pandemic Birthed Entrepreneurs By Anika Ennett
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atching the world change so quickly, right before my eyes was daunting. It was heartbreaking to watch all of the loss, destruction, and racial divide. However, out of the ashes the world displayed their hidden talents. As I focus on the Black community, I watched those that had become unemployed during the pandemic, become entrepreneurs. Fear of the world became one of the most positive forces towards growth and independence. The lens of the world was clouded with unanswered questions, thriving on real fear and the instability of our nation as it related to employment, which caused people to think past going back to the normalcy that we were once accustomed to. Businesses, new ideas, and inventions were birthed out this pandemic. When you have a family to take care of, the economy shutting down cannot be the last stop. The resilience that so many people are exhibiting has become encouraging for those that have been paralyzed by fear. The quarantine of the country basically put the country
on a timeout. The timeout gave people time to delve into deep thought, spend quality time with their families and use the time to launch those dreams that were lying dormant. The family unit was able to be re-introduced because the demand that everyday living had, was putting a wedge between the importance of family connection.
Hair Care Products Sweet Treats People have learned to stretch themselves in the eye of uncertainty and that is a beautiful thing to see. Legacy is what comes to mind as I reflect on this pandemic because people rose to the occasion and refused to be locked out of the
The timeout gave people time to delve into deep thought, spend quality time with their families and use the time to launch those dreams that were lying dormant. I would like to highlight just a few of the areas where I have seen entrepreneurship explode: New Publications (magazines, talk shows on social media) Seamstresses Logo Creators Editing Companies Fashion Designers Organic Soap (creators)
room, where business meetings take place and owning their brands, businesses and no longer a slave to what they have to do, but flourishing into what they want to do. I applaud all of the people that stepped out on faith to tackle their dreams and are winning. It’s time to shine the light on the positivity and starve the negativity so that we can continue to press forward. Are you the next entrepreneur?!
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SPOTLIGHT
Author Spotlight: RL Clark By Christina Woodard
R
.L Clark is an children’s author from Inglewood, CA, who writes and illustrates her own books based on real-life experiences with her own children. Thus inspiring her to write and draw relatable stories in order to connect with other families. A passion for art and a love for her children equals unforgettable memories, laughs, adventure, and quirky comedy. R.L Clark has turned her unexpected hobby into a passion that she now desires to share with everyone! Her books include, most recently published “Anthony: A Day of Toys” and “Anthony: The Mischievous Cat Chase.” The first two books of a four-part book series can be found on Amazon.com and Dorrance Publishing Bookstore. Christina: What is your SwagHer? What makes R.L., R.L.?
follow the adventures of Anthony, who loves to have fun and learns about the people and world around him. Christina: What inspires or motivates you? R.L.: My children, I love them so much, and seeing them every day, and the chaos they
“I wish to inspire them to always do better and stay imaginative.”
R.L.:My SwagHer is my drive. It’s my ability to set a goal and follow through with it. What makes me, me is my passion and my own uniqueness to make my visions come to life and create inspires me to draw. The imaginations of tell a story. kids are amazing and help stimulate my own. Christina: Why did you choose to write children’s books? Why not YA fiction or romance? R.L.: I have kids, and I usually draw and write based on our daily lives plus, kids are amazing, and I wish to inspire them to always do better and stay imaginative. Christina: Tell our readers about your most recent books, “Anthony: A Day of Toys” and “Anthony: The Mischievous Cat Chase.” R.L.: “Anthony: A Day of Toys” is the first book in my four-part series, and “The Mischievous Cat” is the second one. The series will
Christina: What do you believe has been your greatest accomplishment in life? R.L.: Publishing my first children’s book. Christina: What is your writing style? R.L.: I draw first, and then based on the drawing, I create a story. The drawing symbolizes the bigger picture I write. When I write, the words I use are usually straightforward and casual. Christina: What does an ideal day look like for you?
R.L.: Wake up, eat a big breakfast with coffee, and then draw for the rest of the day. Christina: What can we expect next from you? R.L.: The next book in the series “Anthony and Amelia: The Big Shark Ride.” Christina: Do you have any upcoming projects or events you would like to share with our readers? R.L.: I’m starting a book donation program for children in foster care soon called Growing R Readers. Christina: Is there anything else you would like to share? R.L.: No, I think that’s it. Thank you for having me! Please follow me on Instagram and Facebook. I have a website coming soon. Connect with R.L. below: Book Link: https://www.amazon.com/ dp/1099928745/ref=cm_sw_em_r_mt_ awdb_yRO-CbFM36MMQ Instagram: @growingrreaders Facebook: R.L Clark
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The Best Black Sitcom That Taught Us Abou By Christina Woodard
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hat is a sitcom? By definition, a sitcom is a situation comedy. That’s it, just somebody writes about a particular situation going on, and the actors try to make light of the problem. Some of the sitcoms on my list are popular, one I know people have changed their opinion on. Still, no matter if you agree with me if these are some of the best Black sitcoms, we can all agree that they made us laugh, and the topics they brought up were critical to the Black community at that time, and some of their issues are still problematic today. This list is a combination of old and new sitcoms. I want to note that the list is in order by the date the first episode aired, and they are not listed from my favorite to least favorite. Let’s start with the oldies and go back to the 1970s. Good Times: February 8, 1974-January 30, 1980 What was going on in the 1970s? I believe the 70s was a time of change in America, especially for Black people. We were starting to be seen as equals, no more of that colored shit. We got to go to the same places white people went. Segregation ended in 1964 when President Johnson signed the Civil Rights Act. Now that I gave you all a little history
lesson, let’s talk about Good Times. Eric Monte and Mike Evans created Good Times, and it was the first-ever Black two-parent family sitcom to appear on TV. Florida and James lived in the hood, quite frankly with their three kids, JJ, Thelma, and Michael. Florida was the dutiful, ever hopeful housewife who just knew that one day they would get out of the hood. She was always talking about the future with her best friend and neighbor, Willona Woods. James was the disciplinarian and kind of mean, in my opinion. The poor man worked at least two jobs to support his family, so I guess he had the right to have an attitude. JJ was the funny man of the house, wasn’t particularly smart, but was a damn good painter, and his character is known for saying “Dyn-o-mite!”. JJ was always in something, pretty much stayed in trouble, and was never without a girlfriend. Which I found surprising because he wasn’t the brightest or best looking, but it was just something about JJ. Thelma was kind of hard for me to get a grip on. She was smart, pretty, and helpful around the house. She did what she was told and rarely caused problems, but she never took crap from anybody. She dated and even got married to a professional football player. The youngest, Michael, was my favorite sibling. He was young but proud to be Black. He was always fighting something and was never afraid to speak his mind. Good Times tackled problems in the 70s like gang violence, unemployment, discrimination, poverty, and child abuse. Now, I know y’all are probably like child abuse; what child
Good Times showed Black people that their problems were valid and anyone could experience them
abuse? That issue was brought up when Penny, aka little Janet Jackson, came on the show. She was abused by her biological mother and adopted by Florida’s best friend, Willona. All-in-all, Good Times showed Black people that their problems were valid and anyone could experience them and that living in the hood had its good and bad sides, and eventually, they could get out. The Cosby Show: September 20, 1984-April 30, 1992 Now, before y’all try to come for me for putting this show on my list. The Cosby Show paved the way for so many other Black actors and TV shows. There is no denying that The Cosby Show was one of the most influential and successful shows of its time. I know some people hate this show now because of what Bill Cosby did, but I won’t be talking about that in this article, not because it’s unimportant but because I am attempting to separate Bill Cosby from Dr. Huxtable. So, with that being said, let’s have a mini-history lesson. The 1980s signified the end of the Cold Wars, but not only that the 80s was when technology began to
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ms ut Life evolve slowly, but Tim Berners ( the creator of the World Wide Web) was on to something he just needed a little more time. The ‘80s was the era of some of our favorite older singers and actors like Tina Turner, Eddie Murphy, Whitney Houston, and Michael Jackson, who released his second solo album, Thriller. Alright, history lesson complete, let’s talk about the Huxtables.
The Cosby Show showcased Black people in a completely different light. They weren’t low or middle class. These Black people had MONEY! Cliff Huxtable was an OBGYN, and Clair Huxtable was a lawyer. Not only were they well-off, but they had careers that young Black people could see and aim to achieve. I am 90 percent sure that some of y’all decided to become a doctor or lawyer because of Cliff and Clair. Dr. Huxtable and Clair had five children: Sondra, Denise, Theo, Vanessa, and Rudy. The Cosby Show showcased issues like dyslexia, teen pregnancy, and other family issues. This show was so influential that if I continue, I would not be able to move on to the other shows. 2000s kids even knew about The Cosby Show because it was always on TV, up until the truth came out about Bill. I HATE that this show has been tainted because of what Bill did. I know I said previously that I would not talk about what he did, but it’s inevitable. If you speak on The Cosby Show, you have to speak on Bill. After the allegations of his sexual misconduct in 2014, networks stopped airing reruns of the show. When he was convicted of sexual assault in 2018, I have never seen the show again. I wish that they would not have taken it off-air because so many other great Black actors were on it.
The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air: September 10, 1990May 20, 1996 Here come the 90s! My favorite era of all time. I am a 90s baby, so I go hard behind it. I believe the 1990s was a time of inspiration, growth, and achievement for Black people. Let me tell y’all a few things that happened in the 90s. Nelson Mandela was released from prison, became the ANC leader, and eventually became President of South Africa; Tim Berners-Lee officially published a proposal for the World Wide Web, eBay was created, and Princess Diana and Prince Charles got divorced. Princess Diana, unfortunately, passes away, Bill Clinton is elected President of the U.S. a second time, Apple reveals the first iMac computer, J.K. Rowling publishes the first book in the Harry Potter series. Now, moving on to The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, if y’all don’t know what this show is, I don’t know how I feel about yall, lol. Did you have a bad childhood? The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air is where we got to know the acting icon, Will Smith. I don’t care what anyone says. Will Smith is one of the best actors of this generation. Andy and Susan Borowitz created The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. The show stars Will Smith as a fictional version of himself, a teenager born and raised in West Philadelphia
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THE BOSSY ISSUE 9 who is sent to move in with his rich uncle and aunt in Bel-Air after getting into a fight in the local playground in his neighborhood, exactly what the theme song says. His mother shipped poor Will off to boujee ass Bel-Air to live with his Aunt Val, Uncle Phil, and his spoiled, stuck up, entitled cousins Carlton, Hilary, and Ashley. It is seen throughout the series Will has to get used to this way of living. His cousins are used to having things their way, and when Will shows up, it is hectic. Even though The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air is one of the “lighter” shows on this list, it still managed to tackle some pretty big issues, like sexism, drugs, alcohol abuse, gun violence, racial profiling, prejudice, parental neglect, and more. The parental neglect episode may be the most famous episode of The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air when Will’s father abandoned him again, and he shouted “To hell with him,” cried and hugged Uncle Phil. That episode still makes me cry because it’s something that a lot of kids go through; a lot of children are fatherless. Even though the series ended before I was born, I can still tell you about how important it was, or I can tell you every detail of an episode because that’s how big of an impact this show had on the Black community.
the kids watch this. Blackish was created by Kenya Barris and follows the life of an upper-middle-
the prequel, Mixed-ish, or the spin-off, Grownish.
Unlike every other show on this list, Blackish is still going on and discussing new issues within the Black community and the world.
The Parkers: August 30, 1999May 10, 2004 Alright, y’all, I know some of y’all are saying what does The Parkers have to do with significant issues or discussions. I am going to stop y’all right now; let’s discuss. The Parkers is a spin-off from Moesha, and it tells the story of a mother and daughter tackling college together. In my opinion, The Parkers tackled issues like parenting adult children, self-love, and education. Nikki Parker ensured everyone at Santa Monica College that she was not too old to get her education. Now, the main thing that made me mad about The Parkers was how they made Nikki obsess over Dr. Oglevee. You don’t need a man to be successful or happy! Dr. Oglevee was cute, but he wasn’t that damn cute, and he did all that running just to marry Nikki at the end of the series. I was also mad that they made Kim so dumb! Like in Moesha, she wasn’t the smartest, but she wasn’t so dense. In The Parkers, she was plain stupid, but I think they did this to show people that you don’t need a college education to be successful. In the end, Kim flunked out of Santa Monica College but still ended up becoming a successful fashion designer and went into business with her best friend, Stevie. Even though The Parkers had the least “issues” than the other shows, it is still one of my favorite shows to this day. Go watch it! It’s on Netflix, lol. Blackish: September 24, 2014 This is the last one on the list. I’m pretty sure all
class Black family. Let me introduce the parents. Andre is an advertising executive at Stevens & Lido and was raised in the hood by a good old school Black woman; his father was in and out of his life. Rainbow is an anesthesiologist and is mixed with Black and white; this is an important detail to know; that’s why I am mentioning it. She was raised by a Black lawyer mom and a white stay-at-home dad and grew up in a slightly cultish commune. They have five children together and tackle many family, personal, and societal issues. Does that remind anyone of The Cosby Show? Dre constantly tackles this issue: Is his family getting the Black experience while living in the suburbs? In each episode, you can see that he continually looks for the answer to his question. Blackish has tackled issues like race, Black hair, adoption, police brutality, and more. Unlike every other show on this list, Blackish is still going on and discussing new issues within the Black community and the world. If Blackish doesn’t quite interest you, try watching
Many other shows could be included on this list, like 227, Family Matters, Moesha, My Wife and Kids, Martin, The Bernie Mac Show, and Sanford and Son. This list could go on and on, but I digress. These shows and Black actors have played a large part in the lives of Black children and teens. Whether these shows made you laugh, cry, or both, maybe you believed some of these shows held no value. Regardless, these shows did something for the Black community. Let me know what your favorite Black sitcom is.
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BOSSY Brenda: It was beautiful. I’ve been doing this service for many years now. I am my children’s first teacher, and I still check over their schoolwork, essays, term papers, etc., before they turned them in. To me, presentation is everything. Christina: Let’s say someone wants to edit their book themselves. What are some tips that you can give to self-editors? Brenda: Here are a few tips that I stand by: Do your homework; there are plenty of resources available. Print a paper copy out; a printed copy is easier to read than on a computer screen. Have another set of eyes read over your work. Read over your work yourself more than once if needed. Christina: What are four things that make a good book? Brenda: In my opinion, four things that make a good book stand out are: a great title, the font of the text in the book(readability), a page-turner; it keeps you engaged, and it takes you on a journey.
BOSSY WOMAN: BRENDA PRATT By Christina Woodard
Brenda Pratt is a single mother of four beautiful children and a grandmother to three beautiful granddaughters. She is a multifaceted administrative assistant with an extensive background in a variety of office administration duties. She has well, proven organizational skills and can multitask while maintaining a high level of professionalism and has a strong attention to detail. Brenda was the clerk at her church for over 15 plus years, working under the pastor’s leadership. In those years ministering at the church, she also worked with the youth at her church, coordinating youth Sabbath every month, building teamwork, and group building. She didn’t think much of her gift, but she knew that whatever she did, it had to be right, error-free, and organized. Individuals started to notice her passion and gave her the extra push that she needed to try her hand at editing books. She co-edited her first book in 2013, “My Sister’s Arms,” by Monique Elliott. From there on out, Pratt was the sole editor on several books. Brenda’s Editorial Services is her baby, and she is passionate about what she does. She loves editing and proofreading her client’s work and implementing her editorial services. Pratt loves put-
ting projects together, the challenges and all, and seeing the finished project come to life. She’s not trying to keep up with anybody else. The editing process is a journey, and, on this journey, Pratt is learning to become a better person while providing a service that she loves. Christina: What is your SwagHer? What makes Brenda, Brenda? Brenda: What makes Brenda, Brenda is my faith in God first; without Him, nothing would be possible, my “never giving up” attitude, my children, and my love for editing books Christina: Tell us about Brenda’s Editorial Services. When did you start your business, and what inspired you to do so? Brenda: Brenda’s Editorial Services provides proofreading, copy editing, content editing, formatting, typography, and I just added typesetting in November 2020 to authors. I started my business on March 18, 2014, after I co-edited my first project in 2013. Christina: How was your experience co-editing your first book, My Sister’s Arms?
Christina: Do you have any upcoming projects that you would like our audience to know about? Brenda: I have two clients whose projects came out last year, “The Sun Daughter’s Gift,” a magical realism novel, by Eva Finley at www.schulerbooks.com. “Pursuing the Favor of God!” by Dr. William J. Lee, finding favor with God and discovering your purpose in life at www.wjlministries.org. My third client’s highly anticipated book will be out, “Detoxifying our Bodies with Fresh Juices and Smoothies,” with colorful smoothies and juice pictures and recipes, nutritional information, a list of vitamins and minerals, and the importance of eating healthy, by Rah’Shaun Shaffer at rahsnaturalhealth@gmail.com. Connect with Brenda below: Email: brendapratt1010@gmail.com Instagram: @addictedtwou Facebook: Brenda Editorial Services LinkedIn: Brenda Pratt
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SwagHer Spotlight: Attyya Guiles
By Christina Woodard
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ttyya Guiles is the owner and CEO of the ATTYYA Limited Co., a new luxury cosmetics, skincare, and personal care products brand. She is also the owner of Logan La Belle Lashes, the first of several company’s brands. Attyya is excited about her luxury beauty brand’s growth as it expands its locations within metro Atlanta and Myrtle Beach, SC. Attyya is most excited about her newest venture in the restaurant and hospitality industry, ATTYYA’s Restaurants & Hospitality Group, the newest addition to her business organizations. She plans to begin franchising this year. Before her leadership roles in entrepreneurship, she worked for over 15 years as a public-school educator. She taught both middle and high school English and served in a number of leadership capacities. Attyya holds degrees from South Carolina State University, Duke University, and Nova Southeastern University. Attyya is presently in her final semester in the Doctor of Education program in Educational Leadership at Nova Southeastern University. She is ecstatic about launching the ATTYYA Foundation for Outreach and Education. Products from the ATTYYA brand have been seen in several magazines around the world. The company was most recently seen in The World of Interiors Magazine UK. Christina: What is your SwagHer? What makes Attyya, Attyya? Attyya: I would say that Attyya’s SwagHer is built around the determination, perseverance, and confidence that I possess and my ability to help
others develop those same qualities. Attyya is a woman with a warrior spirit who has committed her life to help others see the beauty within themselves. I have always been the person others come to for advice and guidance and a person who looks for positivity in any situation. I’ve spent many days encouraging others to look in the mirror and be proud of what they see. Society can be cruel when it comes to the perception of the body.
I have always been the person others come to for advice and guidance and a person who looks for positivity in any situation
Christina: Tell us about ATTYYA Limited Co. What products do you offer? Attyya: We offer a wide range of products and services. Presently, we carry over 90 products, to be exact. In March, we released an entirely new line of all-natural hair care products. The line is named Cheveux by ATTYYA. We currently offer cruelty-
14 SWAGHER SPRING 2021 free cosmetics, skincare, fragrances, soy candles, room deodorizers and will soon begin selling our hair products and Swiss watches. Products can be found on our website and on Walmart.com. We are expanding globally and locally, so we have a lot for our customers to look forward to. Christina: What are three things people should incorporate into their skincare routines? Attyya: A great skincare routine begins with great products and a great regimen for flawless skin. Of course, I am an advocate for our botanicals skincare products because they are plant-based, filled with antioxidants and natural ingredients like Vitamin E, Vitamin C, chamomile, oatmeal, and aloe. However, great skincare should consist of routine cleansing, toning, and moisturizing. It begins with an excellent gentle cleanser and exfoliator, an allnatural toner, and of course, a great moisturizer. Women and men should build time into their schedules daily to consistently care for their skin.
Christina: Do you have any upcoming projects or events you would like to share with our readers? Attyya: Yes. Our brand, Logan La Belle Lashes, is releasing its custom vending machines for eyelashes and products. Our first set of devices will
to share? Attyya: I would like to share that our brand continues to grow. We have been seen in several magazines such as The World of Interiors, and a few of our products will be seen in Vanity Fair and Glamour. As our brands continue to expand, we
We have been seen in several magazines such as The World of Interiors, and a few of our products will be seen in Vanity Fair and Glamour. be housed in my home state of SC in Myrtle Beach at the Coastal Grand Mall. As I stated earlier, we are releasing an all-natural line of hair products called Cheveux by ATTYYA. We are working on securing a retail store as well. We are always looking to increase brand visibility and awareness through targeted marketing efforts. There is a lot on the way. Christina: Is there anything else you would like
will be recruiting and hiring key personnel. We will post those positions on local job boards. Connect with Attyya below: Website: https://www.attyyalimitedco.com/ Instagram: @attyya_limitedco Facebook: Attyya Limited Co LinkedIn: Attyya Guiles
Author
J.M.
n o z o P J . M. P OZON OP ENS UP AB OUT HER WR I T I NG P R OCESS, WR I T I NG T I P S, AND MOR E.
ON HER WR I T I NG P R OCESS “ I L OVE DEADL I NES. MAYB E I T ’ S MY COMP ET I T I VE NAT UR E, B UT I F EEL L I K E I WOR K B EST UNDER P R ESSUR E, R ACI NG AGAI NST A CL OCK .
HER T OP T I P F OR ASP I R I NG WR I T ER S YOU HAVE T O WR I T E T HE B OOK T HAT WANT S T O B E WR I T T EN. AND, NOT T HE B OOK YOU HAVE T O F OR CE YOUR SEL F T O WR I T E .” HER F AVOR I T E SUMMER OUT WI T T I NG T HE DEVI L , WAS MY F AVOR I T E OF T HI S P AST SUMMER .
ON HER F AVOR I T E WR I T ER S J AMES B AL DWI N, OSCAR WI L DR OB ER T GR EENE, MAL COM GL ADWEL L , NEVI L L E GODDAR D,
J OVAHNA MAR I E, B ET T ER K NOWN B Y HER P EN NAME AS AUT HOR J . M. P OZON I S A F OUR - T I ME P UB L I SHED, AWAR D WI NNI NG P OET , ACT R ESS AND SCR EEN WR I T ER ; WHO HAS T AK EN T HE L I T ER AR Y WOR L D B Y ST OR M. SHE F I R ST GAR NER ED ACCL AI M WI T H HER F I ER Y R OMANCE NOVEL “ SET T I NG F I R E T O T HE DAR K NESS.” AND T HEN AGAI N, WI T H HER GR I T T Y AND SOUL F UL , P OET R Y B OOK “ WHI SK EY F OR T HE WOUNDED. ” WHI CH R ECEI VED F I VE ST AR S AND WAS R EGAR DED B Y T HE “ UR B AN R EADER ” AS A SP I R I T UAL CAT HAR SI S I N WR I T T EN WOR DS. ST R I K I NG AGAI N, AUT HOR J . M P OZON R EL EASED T WO MOR E P OET R Y B OOK S I N 2020. HER HI GHL Y ACCL AI MED B OOK “ ST AR DUST , ” WHI CH HAS B EEN DEEMED AS A HYMN T O SP I R I T UAL I T Y AND WOMEN EMP OWER MENT . AND WAS DUB B ED B Y T HE “ UL T IMAT E R EVI EWER AS T HE MOST P R OL I F I C R EAD OF 2020” . OF COUR SE, T HER E WAS AL SO HER ST EAMY, HOT , ER OT I C P OET R Y B OOK , “ P ASSI ON F R UI T ” ; T HAT HAD EVER YONE T AL K I NG. B OT H B OOK S CAN B E F OUND ON AMAZON AND B AR NES & NOB L E. J OVAHNA I S A R I SI NG ST AR , SHE HAS B EEN SEEN ON F OX, NB C AND CB S. F EAT UR ED I N MUL T I P L E MAGAZI NES, MEDI A AND NEWSP AP ER OUT L ET S. F R OM T HE COVER S OF B L ACK WOMEN R I SI NG MAGAZI NE, WR I T ER ’ S L I F E MAGAZI NE, DET R OI T ENT R EP R ENEUR , T O MEDI UM T O T HE L A T R I B UNE, R I T ZS HER AL D AND MOST R ECENT L Y T HE NEW YOR K T I MES.
THE BOSSY ISSUE 15
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16 SWAGHER SPRING 2021
Simple Self-Care for the Five Senses By Kim Cross
THE BOSSY ISSUE 17
P
vhysical health…check. Mental Health… check check. Self Care…where do I start. Just as going to the doctor for your annual physical and keeping a therapist on standby are critical to preventing any physical conditions and mental turmoil, it’s just as critical to look inward. Taking stock of what or how we are feeling about ourselves is always tough to do. As a woman, you are everyone’s everything — mom, bus driver, teaching assistant, chef, doctor, therapist, friend, business owner, wife, and a host of other titles that may befall being you. As men, you’re looked to for your ability to provide, guide, grocery and Sam’s club runner, teacher’s aid, dog walker, video game partner, homework coach, along with many many other titles. With all of us, no matter what we have to do or who we have to take care of, we MUST remember to love on ourselves. Yes, we’ve gotten deeply into the swing of being everything for everyone. I am guilty of the same. My determination to help everyone in the confines of my household keep their sanity often leave me with not much left in my own bucket of sanity. Changes had to be made. But where was the time? Forget time. Where was the energy? I decided to take baby steps and start with the easy things I love to do. So first came tea. I love a great cup of tea…Maharaja Chai Oolong, Citrus Lavender, and Mango Black from Teavana are my go-to treats. Easy Day tea from Mountain Rose Herbs is magnificent for calming my mind. Initially, I waited until the kiddos were in bed for the night when the silence was golden. I gradually found myself adding a cup (or two) throughout the day. What was amazing is how easily I could lose myself in my cup and how much I enjoyed it. Then came COVID and the list above came with the extra stress of staying sanitary and healthy. After months of wrecking my brain on how to get just 3 minutes of peace, I remembered my tea. How relaxed I was with a 6oz cup of wonderful. From there I set out to find (or remind myself of ) activities and things that invoked that same feeling but with little time and low to no cost. I figure there are plenty more get-it-in-whereyou-can-fit-it-in kind of folks out there who can relate. I’m so excited to be able to share how I love on each of my senses since different parts of me react differently to care and concern. For example, my feet won’t really appreciate getting rubbed on if I’ve not handled this headache that won’t go away unless I get more sleep. So here goes! I hope you can read these with an open mind. Think on each one and see if there are similar activities you can try to show yourself that you are wonderful, amazing, and well-deserving of some just for you. Sa.Da.Tay
Satisfy Your Tastebuds $ As everyone does from time to time, I get in the dump about things. So much so that I can physically feel when an episode is coming. If you can feel it or are in it, go buy that one thing to eat that makes you happy. For me, it’s Moose Trax ice cream or a Chai Tea Latte with no water, extra cool whip. The key? Focus on the flavor and why it makes you say, “MMMmm!” Touch Yourself Though the lyrics of the song are powerful, I don’t mean like diVinyls’ song, I’m referring to things we do daily. Wash your face or soak your feet. Yes, we normally wash our faces everyday anyway, but this time be purposeful in focusing on how the cleanser glides over your face and how the exfoliator (on exfoliation day) is sloughing off the old to make way for the new. Same thing for your feet…be mindful of how it feels. Close Your Eyes and Listen There are several ways to do this for free that you’d think would cost a fair amount. I’ll start with the no cost options first. In Spring, take your first cup of coffee or tea out on the porch or deck and just listen. If you meditate, skip the drink and meditate outside if you can—with nature. The birds and squirrels are usually making a ton of racket that is SO very relaxing. I also enjoy a sleep story from the Calm app each night. In all candor, I can’t say if the stories are good or bad…I’ve never made it through a whole story in the 361 days since I started listening. There’s a ton of helpful things to listen to there, so I paid for the full version even though the free version is more than enough. What’s That Smell? $
(1 drop) My family as a whole all enjoy Lavender and Cedarwood to ease us to sleep (4 drops and 2 drops, respectively) Did You See That?
“It’s beyond amazing to think about what’s beyond the beauty we see in the stars.”
Like listening, there are free and low-cost ways to relax and let your eyes wander. In mild weather, sit outside on a clear night and stargaze. I’m always in such awe when I do this. It’s beyond amazing to think about what’s beyond the beauty we see in the stars. And I swear, the longer I look the more stars that show up. My prayer is that you find guidance or help in the ways to take care of yourself above. Others I use less often include coloring in an adult coloring book, listening to Classical Music for Studying on my favorite music streaming service, and taking a bath on the day I change the sheets on my bed. It’s so easy to get so tangled in the weeds of living
“With all of us, no matter what we have to do or who we have to take care of, we MUST remember to love on ourselves.” Because I so enjoy essential oils and have an almost weird love of fragrance, I found it necessary to use aromatherapy around the house. Invest in an ultrasonic diffuser and pure essential oils. Aura Cacia has a great kit called Discover Relaxation to get you started; be sure to read the learning guide included if you’re unfamiliar with using essential oil. Diffusing essential oil was so beneficial that everyone’s room now has one. My boys diffuse oils to help them sleep and focus, my husband’s office diffuser keeps him mentally clear when he’s at work, and I diffuse blends dependent on what I need. Here’s an essential oil blend I use to feel inspired: Grapefruit Oil (3 drops) Bergamot Oil (2 drops), Lavender Oil (1 drop), Ylang Ylang Oil
life that we lose sight of those simple things that still make us happy. Feel free to share your routines with me or get diffuser blends for a variety of needs. You can reach me below! Website: www.zhibathandbody.com Email: info@zhibathandbody.com Instagram, Twitter, & Pinterest: @ zhibathandbody Facebook: @zhibandb
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BOSSY brand sell cosmetic products, but the staple is that we also donate products to disadvantage teens and women. The brand was designed with versatility in mind to provide affordable and richly pigmented products to the everyday woman, beauty beginner, and expert makeup artists. Christina: What is your SwagHer? What makes Brandi, Brandi? Brandi: Brandi is a strong-willed individual with a pure and giving heart. She wakes up every morning thinking about who needs help and how she can help. Christina: Why did you start The Candy Lady Cosmetics? Brandi: While working as a nurse, and later as a family nurse practitioner, for over 19 years, I noticed that myself and some of my nursing colleagues would just show up for work not as groomed as women from other disciplines. Like many nurses, I worked several jobs and just couldn’t find the time to enhance my “everyday
To me, looking good and feeling good go hand-in-hand
BOSSY WOMAN: BRANDI DAVIS By Christina Woodard
B
randi Davis is the founder of The Candy Lady Cosmetics. The Candy Lady Cosmetics is far bigger than a company filled with fun names, colorful palettes, and candy-themed merchandise. Inspiration from the brand comes from roots deep in New Orleans culture and tradition. The Candy Lady was one of the first
entrepreneurs children saw in neighborhoods. From frozen cups, chips, and of course candy, she was an everyday working individual who serviced the community with products that kept them coming back for more. So too, the brand was created to provide striking looks and bold colors that complement every face it touches. Not only does the
look” the way I would have liked. To me, looking good and feeling good go hand-in-hand, and it creates a burst of confidence like no other. As a lipgloss lover, I decided that it would only be right to create convenient and affordable cosmetics products suited for everyday women, from beauty beginners to pro-MUA. Christina: What is your favorite thing about makeup? Brandi: Make-up makes everyone an artist! I love the freedom and individuality makeup can bring. It allows the artist to showcase their expressions, emotions, and talents with just a few highlights and a perfectly pigmented palette. Christina: Define beauty in your own words. Brandi: Beauty is YOU. I believe that everyone possesses beauty.
THE BOSSY ISSUE 19
Christina: Who or what inspires you? Brandi: There are numerous people I can name in the beauty industry that inspire me, such as; Cashmere Nicole, Supa Cent, the founders of Mented Cosmetics, and more, but there is always that one person whose inspiration triumphs all and for me, this person is my husband. There was a time where he had it all and lost that and more, but despite all the obstacles in his path, including racial discrimination from corporate America, he showed no self-pity. He persevered through every obstacle, no matter the cost. From accepting odd jobs to pursuing several business opportunities, my husband never stopped pushing me to do more and become an entrepreneur. Knowing his story and seeing the resilient and strong individual that was produced has given me a sense that I can do anything, including to grow this brand.
do this? Brandi: I was considered a disadvantaged teen. I was a teenage mother who hid my pregnancy until the day after I graduated from high school. I then transitioned to college, a teenage single mom who didn’t have extra money to buy anything outside of the necessities that myself and my daughter
natural beauty can build confidence. Christina: Do you have any upcoming events or projects you would like our readers to know about? Brandi: We have some new products coming in the summer and fall of 2021, so everyone, stay tuned!
I want to give products to the teen that may be getting ready for prom or a school dance, the parolee who may have a job interview, or the batter women who just want a chance to enhance their beauty.
Christina: Your company donates products to disadvantage teens and women. Why do you all
needed. I would have loved to have had some cosmetics products to wear to both on and off-campus events. I believe everyone deserves a chance to enhance their natural beauty, whether they can afford it or not. I want to give products to the teen that may be getting ready for prom or a school dance, the parolee who may have a job interview, or the batter women who just want a chance to enhance their beauty. I believe that when enhancing your
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THE BOSSY ISSUE 21
ONE NIGHT IN MIAMI
I
magination. A word that has been rolling around in my head for the past couple of months. The movie was promoted to the masses as if it were a historical event. In reality, it is a stage play converted to the screen curated by the beautiful, talented visionary that is Regina King. The Black female director took ownership of this project under the creative wings of the playwright Kemp Powers. It was Powers who imagined a conversation at the Hampton House hotel in Miami, Florida, between boxer Cassius Clay, singer Sam Cooke, civil rights activist Malcolm X, and football player turned actor Jim Brown. The night imagined is February 24th, 1964. The conversation chronicles each male’s role as it relates to current events. It explores a pivotal point in the civil rights movement and creates an intersection between work and woke. The film stars Aldis Hodge as Brown, Leslie Odom Jr. as Cooke, Eli Goree as Clay, and Kingsley Ben-Adir as X. Within each character, we discover a different expression of the Black American soul, which directly correlates to the collective everyday experiences of the Black American. When we start to discuss disenfranchisement in Black communities, we discuss education, health, access to wealth, and housing. The film explores through open-minded conversations from inside the Black mind. In contrast, we normally hear opinions from folks who do not understand the struggle because they do not reflect the struggle. By any means necessary, his famous line is a passion point that Kingsley brings to almost every line in the script. He even walks in and out of rooms passionately. For a long time, the threat of Black empowerment created groups like the KKK, and he flawlessly carries that weight as if we, the viewers, are transported back to 64′. No fear? X also is very aware of his paranoia and increasing anxiety. It’s as if during the night in Miami, he’s holding onto a secret. The film’s end scenes take us back to reality with a scene showing his home being set on fire while he, his wife, and his children sleep inside. The best comedic relief I’ve seen in ages. Eli Goree from C.W.’s The 100 brings laughability, calmness, and bravado to intense scenes through his portrayal of Cassius Clay, honoring his preNation of Islam first and last name, which he changed to Muhammed Ali. I found this to be
very remarkable. Before he fully commits to the Nation of Islam, the intersection Cassius is facing is sort of a cheerleader for his friend Malcolm. We get to see this real-life transformation of someone who was not religious consider committing their life for a bigger cause. Goree is the character who reminds us that even though we are Black, some White people like us too, and we can agree on that. Malcolm humbly tries to explain to Clay that the use of the camera is one of our greatest tools in the fight for equity for Black Americans. He was onto something there. BLM is the civil rights movement on camera. So when Americans pretend not to see, the history has already been recorded, but I digress. Hodge’s character Jim Brown is the everyday Black American male. He chooses money over ideology because wealth empowerment is the Black American’s only true path to freedom and ownership in America. His counter-argument to X’s outbursts of them not doing it the “right way” is usually about having more money, financially, than X. “You don’t got a job, brother.” Hodge brings realness and strength to his character while honing an air of sensibility, like in the scene where Malcolm breaks down due to anxiety, and he comes to soothe him. “Brother, what is going on?” Mental health is on full display as it is a prominent stigma against Black males in society. Why don’t more men cry publicly? Odom Jr as Sam Cooke is a match made in both singing and acting heavens. I truly believe this role was chosen for him, not just because he has the talent, but he also has, well, the wokeness. Odom Jr’s career stands out on its own, from his Nationwide commercials to
One Night In Miami Is A Film Designed To Spark Hard Conversations, For White People By Tahyira Savanna
holding down the cast of Hamilton. He has the acting skills range, and he’s able to suck you into whatever it is he’s performing. He is the opening scene of the film and the closing scene. Performing classic Cooke hits throughout the film, he explains how the record producer figured out the music industry secrets and used it to his Black advantage. “I bet them white people don’t know a Black man wrote that song, though.” His story reminds us of the Black music legends who got screwed out of royalties because they did not understand the business. His arguments with Kingsley are the script’s anchor, as the two have enough passion to go at it forever. But which way is the right way to fight injustice if they’re all Black? I guess that’s the whole point of the film. The four men challenged each other to be more than just their gifts. We, too, are being challenged to change the way we work as it corresponds to our freedoms as Black people. Are we still on plantations, or will we fight for what is due?
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MANDATORY AWARENESS he served diligently in from November 2014 until December 2017. In January of 2017, Dantwan was installed as the Pastor of The Temple Church and Ministries, located at 1844 N. Durham Street in Baltimore, Maryland. He preached his first sermon to a congregation of two individuals. Remembering Matthew 18:20, “Where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them,” he was not discouraged and began to make his vision a reality. Through preaching, teaching, and outreaching, Dantwan began being about his father’s business. Pastor Broady has established himself as a power player in the Broadway East community by hosting ceasefire events and providing legal information. Most recently offering his building as a hub to provide Wi-Fi to the neighborhood, allowing underprivileged children the opportunity to remain competitive with their peers. Fast forward to the year 2021, under the leadership of Pastor Broady, the Temple Church and Ministries now owns almost the entire 1800 block of Durham Street. The church continues to reach out to the community by providing clothing, food, and cell phones to individuals in need. They are planning to assist seniors in an effort to raise morale and will be sponsoring various programs to help with resume building, mentoring, and job placement. In just four short years, the congregation has grown rapidly, and even amid a pandemic, you may have difficulty finding a seat in either service at 9:30 am or 11:30 am. Pastor Broady is the epitome of what is possible when God is in your corner. The Pastor’s anointing is unquestionable and recognized throughout the state of Maryland and with anyone who comes in contact with him. In addition, his social media presence is undeniable, and his number of followers continues to grow in droves.
Pastor Dantwan Broady BY CHRISTINA WOODARD
D
antwan Broady is a native Baltimorean and a graduate of Lake Clifton Senior High School. He holds a Bachelor’s degree from the University of Baltimore. He is the father of three young men and understands the influence, power, and potential African American men can have on Baltimore if they know their value and walk within their purpose. He is also aware of the struggles and uses obstacles as opportunities to build wealth
and increase knowledge within the Broadway East community where he was raised. Pastor Broady preached his initial sermon in November of 2011. As a Southern Baptist Church member, he studied and applied God’s word within all aspects of his life. It wasn’t long before his talents and desire to spread the gospel brought him to be assigned the title of Executive Minister, a position
Christina: What is your Swagger? What makes Dantwan, Dantwan? Dantwan: My Swagger is originality. I’m a classic man. In a world where many people focus on imitation, I stay true to myself. I set the precedence. Instead of following the latest trends, I create the trends. My ambition, vision, and charisma define who I am, and it keeps people intrigued and wanting more. Christina: Did you grow up in church? Is that what piqued your interest in becoming a pastor? Dantwan: Yes, my grandmother is one of the most influential people in my life, and in her house, church was not an option. I cannot say that church piqued my interest in becoming a pastor because I never aspired to become a pastor. Becoming a pastor was more of a calling that I was compelled to answer because when God speaks, you listen. Christina: What is your favorite scripture and why?
THE BOSSY ISSUE 23 Dantwan: Psalm 1 v 1-3 “Blessed is the one who does not walk in step with the wicked or stand in the way that sinners take or sit in the company of mockers, but whose delight is in the law of the Lord, and who meditates on his law day and night. That person is like a tree planted by the streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither whatever they do prospers.” I love this scripture because it illustrates that you will always win as long as you remain connected with God. Christina: How long have you been preaching at The Temple Church and Ministries? Dantwan: I just celebrated my 4th Pastoral anniversary on January 10, 2021. Christina: What are three things you would tell somebody who wants to have a relationship with God? Dantwan: The three things I would tell somebody who wants to have a relationship with God is that he is always available, he is always around, and he is always able. Christina: Do you remember how you felt when you gave your first sermon? Tell us a little about that experience. Dantwan: I absolutely remember my initial sermon. I preached it in November of 2011, and I was
extremely nervous. It is such a humbling experience to preach the word of God. There were so many insecurities, so many feelings of inadequacy that I overcame that day literally as I was preaching. The Lord was present, and his approval allowed me to complete my assignment for that day. Christina: Tell us about the ceasefire events that you host. Dantwan: Regardless of whether you have visited Baltimore, Maryland or not, they are known for being one of the most dangerous cities. The neighborhood I Pastor in is called the Broadway East community and is also where I was born and raised. I believe that if you are not a part of the solution, you are a part of the problem. I have partnered with various political leaders and law enforcement within the city to emphasize peace. Whenever a situation arises, I am front and center, and I offer my church as a place where people can meet, which serves as a neutral location. I encourage dialogue and peaceful resolutions while incorporating scripture to provide hope for people who believe they are in hopeless situations. Christina: Do you have any upcoming events or projects that you would like our readers to know about? Dantwan: There is always something happening
at the Temple Church and Ministries. Outreach is a primary focus, and my vision for that expands far beyond the resources readily available at my church, and various organizations always bless us. I would like your readers to follow us on Facebook, Instagram and review our website at www. thetemplechurchandministries.org for up-to-date information on what is happening in and around The Temple. Christina: Is there anything else you would like to share? Dantwan: There is no place like the Temple. If you have not joined us in person or followed us, you are truly missing out. We are very down-to-earth, and unlike any other church you have attended. I am approachable and genuinely want to see everyone succeed. I am fully vested in my congregation and would love to be your Pastor or even connect with you. Please visit us at 1844 N. Durham Street, Baltimore, Maryland 21213. You can contact me anytime at templechurchministry@gmail.com. Website: www.thetemplechurchandministries.org Instagram: @templechurchministries Facebook: The Temple Church and Ministries
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THE BOSSY ISSUE 25
Mental Health of Black Officers at Stake By Kaitlan Darby
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and violence. This is what led Kerr to commit suicide in his uniform, in his police cruiser in front of his employment building.
Kerr spoke extensively about seeing the justice system’s corruption and how it affected him as an officer and a Black man. He also spoke about lack of mental health in policing, police brutality, division in society, children exposed to trauma at an early age, and murder
Kerr was a veteran that served in Afghanistan and Iraq, an officer since 2015, a New Orleans native, and a father of two. Kerr recalled having to have a difficult discussion with his children about dealing with a police
Black Lafayette, Louisiana police officer took his own life on February 1 of this year. Deputy Clyde Kerr III died of a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head shortly after posting videos online condemning police brutality and racism. Kerr said that he was fed up and tired of serving a system that “doesn’t give a damn.”
officer after his son saw the widely circulated video of George Floyd’s murder. The death
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weighed heavily on Kerr’s mind. In one of the videos posted prior to Kerr’s death, he also mentioned the murders of Breonna Taylor, Botham Jean, and Trayford Pellerin, who were killed at the hands of the Lafayette Police Department. Kerr spoke of his intention to commit suicide as his ways of protesting and that he needed to do something that was bold and dramatic. This was his way of making a statement against police brutality and everything else that comes from the wicked policing system. It was obvious from Kerr’s videos that he had concerns about the direction police working was going. Kerr continues to explain how if anyone thinks that what’s going on in the justice system is right, something is wrong. “I understand we have a tough job, but we signed up for this. We need help. Because when you deal with the bottom rung of society, that does not give us an excuse to just do whatever you want, and that’s what we’re doing, and we’re not being held accountable.”
One of Kerr’s closest friends, Michael Robison, said that Kerr loved being an officer; he just didn’t always love what went on behind the scenes. Robinson did say that Kerr had some wonderful ideas about gaining back the public’s trust. In one of the last videos Kerr posted, you see him in his cruiser, sitting outside of one of the schools that he was a resource officer for. You see him waving to the children, unbeknownst to them, it would be the last time they waved goodbye to Officer Kerr, the last time they saw his contagious smile, the last time they’d fist-bump him. Kerr’s statements on mental health may have struck a chord with many officers, who often have the option of mental health resources; however, there was a stigma on getting those services. Much like the stigma around mental health outside of policing, those who seek help are looked at as “weak.” Currently, LPD requires any officer who gets in a critical incident to go to counseling. Outside of that, officers
can get counseling anonymously, the department will pay the bill, but a name will not be attached to it. This leaves those on the outside looking in to wander: Is there any way we can fix such a broken system? Why is mental health still so stigmatized, and how do we keep policing from negatively affecting the lives of POC (specifically Black people)? It’s clear that more needs to be done. The justice system isn’t just ruining lives on the outside; it’s destroying the lives of its own people. Clyde Kerr III was a father, a star-officer, and a Black man who wanted to see the justice system be better, but instead, he’s another Black life lost at the hands of the justice system. If you or someone you know is having thoughts of suicide, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255). There is also a crisis text line. For crisis support in Spanish, call 1-888-628-9454.
Dr. Candace Elaine, PsyD. "Talking is exciting, planning is excellent, however action is exceptional."
Dr. Candace Elaine is a Clinical Psychologist and Personal Development Coach for the Forgotten Woman. Her target focus is assisting women and couples on their Mental Health journey while establishing healthy relationship skills. Dr. C implements integrative methods as well as real, raw, and relatable techniques. Dr. C meets you mentally where you are. She is a non-traditional therapist with a unique persona. My clients learn that accountability, planning, and purpose are some of the main elements for transformation while incorporating the mind, body, and soul
Anxiety, Stress Management, Depression, The Stuck Syndrome, Trauma, Relationship Healing, Mental Health Check-ups
Email: candace@waltersgroupforwomen.com | website: waltersgroupforwomen.com | 1-855-354-7759 | Offering in office & Teletherapy | Text COPE to 474747
THE BOSSY ISSUE 27
28 SWAGHER SPRING 2021
SHE’S
A
BOSS
THE BOSSY ISSUE 29
She’s A Boss: Nicole Walters By Francheska “Fancy” Felder
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SA’s She’s the Boss is a wholesome family show starring Nicole Walters, her hubbin Josh, and daughters Ally and Krissy, who she affectionately nicknamed the Tinies along with their manny Eddie. The family was tapped for their own show because of how dynamic their family is. Nicole, Ghanian-American, and Josh, a Jewish lawyer, adopted the girls and their other sister Daya after meeting their birthmother
in front of 10,000 viewers. Since then, Nicole has started her company, Inherit Learning Company, helping business owners and entrepreneurs go from idea to global impact. When asked to describe her swagher, Nicole responds, “I definitely think that a lot of it comes from the strengths I have in in different areas. I don’t pretend to know everything about all the things, but what I do know I carry that with a lot of confidence and a lot of swag. So I understand business and I know the answers for business, and I know how to support people and their businesses. So that’s something that you will see me have a little pep in my step about because I know what I am doing.” On several episodes, Nicole has admitted to thinking with her business brain, which made me wonder if she ever turns her business brain off. “I mean, I try to because business brain definitely doesn’t belong in parenting, but it pops up where it shouldn’t and it gets me into trouble all the time.You’ll see that on the show a lot,” she says with a laugh. It is often these moments that Nicole is referring to when asked what did she like least or most about having her family on tv.
panhandling on Baltimore’s streets. We see the family deal with real-life, lesson learning events, but long before Nicole was on television, she had a viral moment when she quit her job at Fortune 500 Company on Periscope
The Ghanian-American says,” I think the hardest part about is going back and watching moments and saying to yourself, how could I have done that differently? How could that moment have been improaved.” She continued, “You know, and it’s rare; we all make parenting mistakes or errors of growth, but being able to
watch them on replay or repeat, with millions of people, is a different energy.” We had to know a little more about Nicole and Eddie, the family’s manny, because their relationship seems so genuine and funny. “I always joke, don’t bring home guys that you meet at the mall. Right? Because that’s what happened with Eddie. I bumped into him at a store probably three and half years ago now so it’s been some time, like long before the show happened that Eddie’s been in our lives,” Nicole jokes. “He’s like our fourth child!”
30 SWAGHER SPRING 2021 Nicole is amiable and quick thinking. This can be seen on the show, and I picked it up during our time together. No question knocked her on her feet. All are good traits for a leader because she seemed very down-to-earth, like a down-toearth boss. So I was curious to know what other characteristics would Nicole attribute to good leadership.
self-care is to me. It’s really recharging so that I can be my best for everyone else.
Nicole replies, The best and most important trait of a leader is knowing how to be a humble follower. Right?”. “Many people think that to lead, you act a certain way to be a CEO, which means you’re in charge and you’re bossing people around, but a great leader knows how to listen. They know when to step back. They know what they don’t do well and how to let people shine in those areas. A leader listens for solutions given to them by their team to apply what’s really going to work. As funny as it is, the show is called She’s the Boss, but what you will learn pretty quickly is that I am not the boss of anything. No one takes me seriously. I am just trying to keep it together the whole time while they are running the show, she explains, laughing.
know what we can do what we say we are able to do. If you are able to do those things, then you are actually able to start, and it does seem lke something you can actually accomplish. So, if you are afraid to gaet out there, make the dream a little right size, not small, but make it right size and then pursue it.”
This is true; I noticed that Nicole is often led to her outcomes by the both indirect and sometimes direct outcomes. So what advice would Nicole give to other women who are afraid to put themselves out there? “You don’t have to start big. A lot of time, we are comparing ourselves to someone whose already done it in a big way.” She continues, “We don’t realize that the ideal way to get started is to actually start small with what’s manageable and where we
As we often want to know our guest, we asked Nicole what does self-care mean to her. “For me, it’s not just something required for myself. It’s actually business care, and it’s family care. It’s not just about me because if I can take this time to reenergize and recharge myself, I actually be better at all the jobs that I have to fill. There is no way that you can be an effective mom, or wife, or friend, or business owner if you aren’t taking the time out to make sure you are in a good place. I love to take quarterly self-care sabbaticals, where I just take three days, and I don’t- and sometimes I go places, you know travel if I want to be fancy. But because of the pandemic, it’s been going down the street and staying at a local hotel. It’s saying, “I’m nobody’s anything. Y’all goin’ bring me food; I’m not answering any questions. Mom is closed.” You know? And doing that, I found that I returned even better for the next stage. So that is what
So what does Nicole think of the whole work-life balance idea? She doesn’t believe in it. “I am a big believer in that the whole thing is bogus. There is no such thing as work-life balance, and it kills me that people are selling journals and solutions, processes, and apps- all this stuff to magically get you in balance when really all we need to embrace imbalance as part of the journey. So embracing imbalance means you say, “Look, I’m going to put my time and my efforts in the places that matter most and make sure that I am there completely.” Rather than you saying, “I’m going to be perfectly in balance, everyone is going to be happy, and I’ll do all the things.” Further explaining, she says, “It’s just not realistic. As soon as I embraced imbalance as part of the experience I found myself being really able to say “you know what, I am actually
not as bad at this whole thing as I thought I was.”” Nicole is currently in the process of writing her first book. You can catch more of Nicole on her podcast, The Nicole Walter’s Podcast and on USA’s She’s the Boss, which airs every Thursday night.
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Curated by Francheska Fancy Felder and Kennedy Herndo
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Missing Pieces
BY CHRISTINA WOODARD
W
hen I was 17 years old, I went to the doctor because I had never gotten a period. All of my friends had gotten theirs years ago; my family thought I was just a late bloomer, like all of the women in my family. They all had messed up periods, and all bloomed late. They thought I was the same. They just didn’t know how wrong they were. When my mom finally decided to take me to the doctor, it was because I was complaining about cramps. I was having cramps, but no period. I will never forget how confused I was when I went there. I didn’t understand half of the shit that the nurse practitioner was telling me. “You could have this or that. I’m sure it’s something that can be easily fixed”. Well, guess what it wasn’t something that could be “easily fixed.”
1Mayer-Rokitansky-Küster-Hauser (MRKH) syndrome is a disorder that occurs in females and mainly affects the reproductive system. This condition causes the vagina and uterus to be underdeveloped or absent, although external genitalia are normal. This condition affects roughly 1 in every 5,000 girls at birth, so I guess that makes it pretty rare. Women with this condition can have a combination of a missing or partial uterus or a missing or partial vaginal opening. The syndrome is named after the doctors who discovered it and guess who has it. Yep, me.
Personally, I have no uterus, and my vaginal opening was basically non-existent. Thankfully, the vaginal opening part can be fixed through surgery or dilation therapy. I wasn’t even thinking about getting it fixed at the time because I
THE BOSSY ISSUE 35 didn’t plan on having sex anytime soon. A year later, at 18, I was like, um, OK, I’m not trying to be a virgin for life, lol. When the words, vaginal agenesis (another name for MRKH), came out of the doctor’s mouth. I was like, what the fuck is that, sir? After he explained, I was just stuck, and the first words that came to my mind were: I am defective. I am literally missing pieces. Am I even a woman? Am I unlovable because of this? Why me? I cried a lot that day. After my initial depression of finding this out, I tried to push it in the back of my mind. Then, I tried just saying fuck it and telling all of my friends and family about it because then if I told them first no one could use this to hurt me, I outed myself. Once, I got to college, knowing about this and never having anyone to relate to or talk to about it really affected me. I tried not to let other people know about it. I was happy and laughing on the outside, but I would cry myself to sleep when I would be alone. I was slowly beginning to hate myself. I started telling my-
self that I was being overdramatic; it’s not like I had something that could kill me. I was being ungrateful, they have people in the world with so much worse things happening to them, and I was sitting here crying because I couldn’t have a baby. So what?! Faking being OK, didn’t help at all. I would have random moments where I would burst out in tears, and then this would start happening around people, so I would have to literally escape to run to my room to have my moment. If this is something that I still struggle with daily, why am I sharing? The answer is simple. I can not be my best self if I continue to act like I am OK. Maybe me sharing my struggles will help someone else with MRKH or infertility issues. A lesson that I am continually learning is that MRKH does not define me. Yes, it is and will always be a part of me, but it does not make me, me. At the age of 17 is when I stopped loving myself. At the age of 23, I am beginning to love me for all of me, MRKH included.
Mayer-Rokitansky-Küster-Hauser syndrome: MedlinePlus Genetics. (2020, August 18). Retrieved February 25, 2021, from https:// medlineplus.gov/genetics/condition/mayer-rokitansky-kuster-hauser-syndrome/#:~:text=Mayer%2DRokitansky%2DK%C3%BCster%2DHauser%20(MRKH)%20 syndrome%20is,although%20external%20 genitalia%20are%20normal. Photo: https://www.floravi.com/en/blog/MRKH_ syndrome/
36 SWAGHER SPRING 2021
Nicole R. Goode: The People’s Intellectual
By Christina Woodard
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icole R. Goode, M.A., affectionately known as “Nikki G,” is the owner and founder of Nicole R. Goode, M.A.’s School of Sexology, Nikki G’s Spot, and UnCovering You with Nikki G(PODCAST), all divisions of N.R. Goode Enterprises, LLC. Nicole is a professionally-trained and academically credentialed sociologist, sexologist, and master teacher. She is also the published author of the book, Woman Up: This Is Not About Him…It’s About You! Goode is a fervent advocate for women’s rights and empowerment, the understanding of men, masculinity, power and gender dynamics. She is also very passionate about the subjects of bridging and healing relationships, building family and community, establishing and enhancing holistic connections (mindbody-heart-spirit-soul), manifesting intimate cultivation of self, and the sociology and spirituality of human existence and experiences. Nicole is an expert on Black sexuality in America and divine feminine, as it pertains to expression, eroticism, sensuality, and the spirituality of sex. She is a resonating voice for masculine and feminine principles. Goode offers a unique combination of sociological and psychological approaches fused with a historical, scientific, cultural, and spiritual understanding. She graduated Distinguished/ Summa Cum Laude from DePaul University, earning a Master of Arts in Sociology, with specialized studies in the following areas: sexuality, gender, male masculinity and power, group dynamics, race and ethnicity, social inequality, and stratification. Goode is a member of the esteemed Alpha Kappa Delta International Sociology Honor Society, renowned for its excellence in the study of social problems and social awareness. Alpha Kappa Delta promotes intellectual activities that lead to an improvement in the human condition. Nicole leads a life dedicated to the elevation and empowerment of humanity as she provides knowledge, wisdom, understanding, and guidance. Her services are a safe space, a truth space, a learning space. Christina: What is your SwagHer? What makes Nicole, Nicole? Nicole: I am that I am, and within all I am are many paradoxes. I embrace that and boldly stand in it. When I say this, I mean that I could list all of my life victories and challenges that I have overcome thus far--my gifts, talents, attributes, accomplishments,
academic degrees, loves, passions, and pleasures. It still would not adequately explain the entirety of me. It would simply be touching a beautiful surface. The amazement is in the vastness and depth of me, there is no end. I am a dichotomy in one body--a “social butterfly” that requires space and solitude. I am exuberant and reserved. Highly intelligent and studious. The life of the party, quite entertaining. Intuitive, yet analytical and logical. Fun and serious. Adventurous [and spontaneous], yet very methodical and calculating. I love to dance (a lot) and listen to various music genres, but I absolutely enjoy stillness and complete silence. I am a deep thinker and a doer. A humanitarian at heart that is independent in every sphere of my being. I am unconventional and iconoclastic, yet I honor ancient traditions and spiritual systems. I am kind and most fierce, full of joy and peace, but a blazing warrior. I am gentle yet firm, commanding and flowing. Connected, yet detached. Whole and many parts. Close, but free. Mysterious and welcoming. Open, yet safeguarded. Wild and cultivated. Light and darkness. Creator and creation. All in complete balance. Can you imagine what it is like being me? I AM a whole universe within myself and my own muse. It really is awesome being me because I am in total agreement with myself ! I love and like myself ! I am one of my greatest explorations. I am not wrestling with aspects
I AM a whole universe within myself and my own muse.
of who I AM because they are opposites. That’s been key for me: embracing my dynamics…no holds barred. I am a walking enigma [to many], but this is only because my very existence is ahead and beyond limitations pertaining to thinking and being in this world. I AM the paradigm shift, a new zeitgeist, and consciousness. I mind-boggle,
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and this is the way it was intended to be. I AM that I AM —Nikki G with all of my intricacies. I am a juggernaut, an empowering guide...a liberating soul. Christina: Why become a sexologist? What inspired you to pursue a career in that field? Nicole: I have a Master of Arts in Sociology from DePaul University (Chicago, IL) specializing in Sexuality, Gender, Men/ Masculinity and Power, Group Dynamics, Race and Ethnicity, Social Inequality, and Stratification. I am a Sociologist-Sexologist. I make it a point to emphasize sociology not merely because that is the advanced degree I earned, but it is the main perspective from which I teach. Sexologists vary in pedagogical emphasis. My sociological treatment of sexology, along with psychological, scientific, spiritual, historical, and cultural context, allows for a thorough and holistic approach to the study of human sexuality, specifically Black sexuality in America. Just as unique as I AM in my specializations and approach, so is the experience of African descendants in the Americas. I chose this [career] path because of my love and commitment to education, total empowerment, and the uplifting of African descendants and women. Mastery in sexuality leads to the whole mastery of self. Mastery of self makes way for liberation and freedom. A liberated (knowledgeable and wise) people are capable of ruling thyself entirely in every aspect of their existence--complete sovereignty. So when I say, “I chose this path,” in reality, I am saying that I yielded my life to my SOUL PURPOSE, and I WILL see it to the end. Christina: Tell us a little about your podcast, UnCovering You with Nikki G. Nicole: My podcast is the taboo provocateur. I discuss the gray areas that people avoid talking about--at least publicly-but many people dwell in; they just don’t want anyone else to know about them. However, what I do on my podcast is provide a non-judgmental space for those who want to learn and understand more about human sexuality in all of its various expressions. I also make it a point to ensure that my guests and audience members know who they are and what they [can] do. I want them to understand that what they may feel is not necessarily abnormal, although it may not be accepted as a social norm. Essentially, UnCovering You with Nikki G relishes the “gray area.”
THE BOSSY ISSUE 39 Christina: For the people who don’t know or understand what a sexologist is or what they do, can you explain? Nicole: Again…I am a SociologistSexologist. I want to be very clear about that. A sociologist teaches the science of society, societal systems, social structures, and organizations within a particular society. A sociologist identifies social institutions, social relationships, collective and individual human behaviors. A sexologist teaches the science of human sexuality--sexual interests, sexual behaviors, sexual functions, and relationships. Sexology tends to utilize several other academic fields in the analysis, synthesis, and presentation of information. I am a teacher of both sociology and sexology, and my teachings are scientifically-based. Christina: What type of services do you offer to your clients through Nicole R. Goode, M.A.’s School of Sexology, and Nikki G’s Spot? Nicole: Nikki G’s Spot is your “one-stopshop” for sex education, empowerment, and wellness, providing the information and tools necessary to enhance relationships and sexual experiences. Nikki G’s Spot offers: Sexology Tutorials and Workshops Consultations Nicole R. Goode, M.A.’s School of Sexology, provides university-level instruction without the exorbitant college tuition prices. Students can expect to learn about human sexuality in conjunction with spirituality from a sociological perspective. Nicole R. Goode, M.A.’s School of Sexology Offers: Sexology Courses and Seminars Consultations and Coaching Christina: What does your ideal day look like? Nicole: My ideal day looks like the reality of my day--productive, peaceful, and full of laughs. Christina: Do people ever comment that what you do is weird or taboo? How do you respond to people like that? Nicole: People do not comment to me that what I do is weird or taboo, but I have been referred to as “controversial” a few times…usually by women. I used to reply, “Controversial to who and in regards to what?” None of those individuals ever had a response. I digress. What I do know is this: many people project themselves unto
others at the level of their thinking and being, which for some, is quite limited, sometimes fragmented, broken, and insecure. I do not concern myself with other people’s misunderstandings that they hold so firmly to regardless of facts, evidence, and truth. I refuse to contend with other individuals’ adamant cognitive dissonance. We all must reconcile ourselves unto ourselves and let the best us win. Christina: Define EMPOWERMENT in your own words. Nicole: FREE TO FULLY BE and LIVE THAT FULLNESS BOLDLY and UNAPOLOGETICALLY. Christina: Do you have any upcoming events or projects you would like our readers to know about? Nicole: My online tutorials and quick sessions are always fun, educational, entertaining, and interactive. Currently, I have exclusive virtual private Sexology Q&A events. To gain access, one must follow and engage on my social media platforms. Private virtual invites are extended to those individuals who are (consistently) active participants on my social media platforms. UnCovering You with Nikki G (Podcast) started season two. Definitely tune-in! https://nikkigspot.com/uncovering-youwith-nikki-gI have a Special Offer on my book right now... Woman Up: This Is Not About Him, It’s About You Use Code: 50Off Purchase Your Copy Here: http://nikkigspot.com/the-goddessboutique-at-nikki-gs-spot.html Nicole R. Goode, M.A.’s School of Sexology has partial tuition scholarships available. Please visit our website to apply. This is a highly selective and limited opportunity. We also started the S.A. Hayes Scholarship recently in March 2021, which covers full tuition and coaching sessions at Nicole R. Goode, M.A.’s School of Sexology. The S.A. Hayes Scholarship is specifically for single mothers and/or female domestic violence survivors with an income of less than $50,000 per year. To donate to our S.A. Hayes Scholarship Fund, please visit: https://www.paypal. com/paypalme/NRGoode (N.R. Goode
Enterprises, LLC) Note: S.A. Hayes Scholarship Christina: Is there anything else you would like to share? Nicole: Most definitely check out my consultation services. Consultation sessions with me are similar to counseling services. Specifically, my consultations are action/ resolution-oriented, client-centered, and focused on personal growth, ‘self-uncovering,’ self-agency, and self-efficacy. I serve more as a facilitator, teacher, and guide. Now, you may be thinking that there has to be a problem or a pressing issue in order for an individual or couple to seek consultations. Not necessarily and definitely not always. That is the thing about consultation services with me. Just as life is a journey, so is our need throughout various stages of our lives to seek--we seek guidance, clarity, confirmation, more knowledge, in-depth analysis, a different perspective, a call-to-action, a revelation, a realization, an affirmation, wisdom, understanding, and support. If you want answers to life’s perplexities and vicissitudes, I’ve got them! My clients have affectionately nicknamed me “The Oracle.” Connect with Nicole R. Goode, M.A. below: Website: https://linktr.ee/ NicoleRGoodeMA Website: www.NikkiGSpot.com Instagram: @nikki_gspot Facebook: @NikkiGSpot / @ TheGoodeLearningExperience (School of Sexology) / @UnCoveringYouWithNikkiG (PODCAST) Twitter: @NikkiGSexology Clubhouse: @NicoleRGoodeMA
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BETTER LIFE. BETTER BUSINESS. BETTER RESULTS.
Dr. Carlene Randolph WOMEN IGNITE NOW | CHILLIN WITH COACH CAI
W.I.N. provides women who are start ups or in business less than 6 years in urban communities to build systematically successful businesses that thrive and support their communities. @COACHCAI1 INFO@WOMENIGNITENOW.COM HTTPS://CAISM.ME/
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BOSSY ing and entertaining her guests. She is the creator and accomplished facilitator of several successful events such as the Living Behind the Mask Masquerade Gala, which honors overcomers of domestic violence, and Tea Party Socials, which brings women together to have those deep conversations with hopes of creating social change. All of these events are fundraisers designed to benefit ROS and raise consciousness, bring the community together in support of other survivors, and leave her guests with a sense of awareness and an experience that will last a lifetime. Thompson is the mother of two sons and the author of “The ReBirth,” “Don’t Spill the Tea,” and co-author “Women Win Against All Odds.” Christina: What is your SwagHer? What makes Rhonda, Rhonda? Rhonda: I have always had the persona as being over the top or extra. I like to think that I am a lover of life, people, God, and everything I do; I do it in the spirit of excellence, not because I am so amazing but because God is. I live my life as best as I can to please and represent him. My faith is the foundation of who I am. I am also an artist of expression in many ways, meaning I may express myself differently at times through the spoken word or by way of my attire or events I host.
BOSSY WOMAN: RHONDA ANITA By Christina Woodard
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honda Anita, formerly known as Rhonda A. Thompson “A Voice for the Voiceless” Award Winning and 2x International Best Selling Author, is an overcomer of domestic violence, child sexual assault, three suicide attempts, to name a few. She became an astonishing award-winning empowerment speaker, certified healing life coach and author, who informs, motivates, and empowers women of all walks of life to live purposefully. She is also a champion for victims and struggling survivors of domestic violence, sex trafficking, and sexual abuse. She is dedicated to helping others see their options and their potential to find freedom ultimately. With focus and determination, going from survivor to overcomer, this Milwaukee, Wisconsin native earned her Bachelor’s Degree in Business Management and, subsequently, became the CEO and Founder of Rose of Sharon Transitional Living for Women, Inc. Also an ordained minister; Rhonda uses her “voice,” her experience, and her education to enlighten others to help release them from the pain of abuse and hurt. She is the epitome of “my
sister’s keeper.” Thompson is making sure that her empowerment brand is dedicated to helping all women transform, renew, recover and restore every aspect of their lives. She takes pleasure in empowering others to know their God-given birthright and to walk in their ordained freedom. Thompson’s mission is “Healing the human spirit by equipping women to create their reality of wholeness through self-awareness, confidence, and forgiveness.” Real Estate Mogul, “Real Estate’s Leading Lady,” has been featured in ABC, NBC, CBC, FOXNews, Rolling Out Magazine, Sheen Magazine, Atlanta Live TV, Darlene Mc Coy syndicated radio show, and many more. Thompson’s service work to others has resulted in her receiving multiple awards in August 2019; Anita was awarded the legendary Congressman John Lewis Ambassador Award. In June 2018, she was granted the Dove awards at the 90th year Sigma and Zeta’s Founder’s Day, to name a few. Thompson’s passion for event planning has been an extraordinary masterpiece and an opportunity to foster domestic violence awareness while enlighten-
Christina: You are the author of “The Rebirth” and “Don’t Spill the Tea.” Tell our readers a little bit about your books. Rhonda: “Don’t Spill the Tea’’ was my first book, a very bold and scary declaration of overcoming many tragic events. The reader gets a glimpse into the life of a woman who was completely broken yet was redeemed. The book is also a self-help guide for understanding domestic violence and how to get out. The book goes into how I changed my life to become the woman of God that I am today and many of my wins. Although “Don’t Spill the Tea’’ was terrific, “The Rebirth” is really my pride and joy. This book became an international bestseller in June 2020. I redefined the word “Rebirth” as Releasing Every Burden Into a Revelation that Transcends Hurt. It is a 28 Day Healing devotional that helps the reader to reprogram thinking. For 28 days, you are challenged to face your scars and pull the scab off; with this new mind shift, the wound can heal properly. The book dives deep into areas such as selflove, forgiveness, grief, health, and wellness, among many other topics. Christina: Where can your books be purchased? Rhonda: Both may be purchased on Amazon, but to obtain a signed copy, visit www.RhondaAnita. com Christina: What do you offer for women at your nonprofit, Rose of Sharon Transitional Living for Women, Inc? Rhonda: ROS is a 501c3 domestic violence
42 SWAGHER SPRING 2021 organization that helps women and children fleeing an abusive relationship. We help families recover by providing supportive services through their transition. Our services can range from transportation, hotel stays, food, clothing, etc. We also help women that are getting out of sex trafficking. Christina: You are a true survivor. You have overcome domestic violence, child abuse, suicide attempts, and more. How did you get through all of that? Please tell us a little bit about one of those times and what you did to overcome it. Rhonda: Thank you, during this time, I was broken, didn’t know my value or self-worth. I was, however, fortunate that I never had to flee an abuser. I just left. The problem was I kept dating men with the same abusive qualities. My mother and father were the first ever to abuse me; so, my entire foundation had to be repaired. My faith was the saving grace. I joined my local church and gravitated to strong women of faith who later became my midwife. They helped me with prayer, love, and support. Learning to love Rhonda, I grew to have a distaste for the types of relationships and found value in who I was that I no longer wanted to die. Christina: Not only are you a business owner and author, but you are also a real estate agent. How did
you get into real estate? Rhonda: Many years ago, my best-friend Cleopatra was studying Carlton Sheets’s real estate program. She was so excited that she called me one day, and we had a three-hour conversation about what she learned. My spirit caught on fire. I was so excited I immediately started putting things into action. I was working in property management at the time. My credit was great, and I started buying properties. Back then, you could pretty much do this with 100% financing. During the process of becoming a landlord and investor, I thought it would benefit me even more to get my license. By the time the market crashed in 2007, I owed 11 properties with only a G.E.D. I later went on to college. I relocated to Atlanta that year and didn’t practice real estate as I did again until COVID happened. At that time, I went back into full-time real estate sales and have been an intricate part of helping many families obtain the joy of homeownership for the first time. Real Estate’s Leading Lady, “Allow me to facilitate your dream.” Christina: Define empower-
ment in your own words. Rhonda: As a certified life coach focusing on healing, my definition of empowerment is showing others that they already have the power to get it done through self-awareness. Connect with Rhonda below: Booking Email: Realestatesleadinglady@gmail. com Website: www.RhondaAnita.com Instagram: RhondaAnita_ Facebook: Rhonda Anita Twitter: RhondaTheAuthor
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Traveling Is Therapy By Karlyn Leblanc, LMSW
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osing my niece to a tragic school shooting led to years of severe depression. I decided to take my life back. Black Girls Travel Therapy was born. Black Girls Travel Therapy is an organization for black women 21 and over. We assist you by guiding you along a path to heal the mind, body, and soul by traveling, fine dining, support for your black business, and networking opportunities. In return, creating a sisterhood that allows us to give back to communities in need in the process. Traveling had always been my saving grace, and I wanted it to be that for others. I started with small trips with friends. On each trip, I would assess, observe, and analyze each person behind the scenes. At the end of the trip, I would send a case study to each of them of my findings. Many of my friends suffered from depression, anxiety, grief, bipolar, stress, and anger issues. However, while we were on vacation, no one exhibited any symptoms of their diagnosis. I repeated this protocol on every trip for years, and the results were the same. No one experiences unhappiness on our vacations. After the research was complete and in my favor, I launched my business, Black Girl Travel Therapy, to the world. Traveling is therapy. It is healing to the body, mind, and soul. It gets the endorphins and
dopamine in the brain, pumping happy juices which make us feel good. The thought of a vacation triggers these positive emotions. Women start picturing themselves in paradise. They start talking about the upcoming trips and preparing, which keeps the happy momentum going. And with Black Girls Travel Therapy, there is no stress with the planning; it’s a stress-free routine. We do all the leg work associated with travel. And when our guests arrive, they’ll have me, the travel therapist, a masseuse, a chef depending on the venue, butlers, and now personal trainers. My belief is that all women should be loved and adored, pampered, and catered to. I also implemented excursions and unadulterated fun activities. Women need a break from everyday stresses, and they also need to learn how to live a happy life in their environment. Black Girl Travel Therapy retreats give them the tools to return home and have balanced mental well-being. Our newly added virtual training plan has been in effect for one year. Our members who were diagnosed
LaKisha Mosley The LM Experience Event Planning & Management EntrepreneurshipTime Management & Balance Mompreneurship Panelist | Presenter | Speaker The LM Experience @thelmexperience LaKisha Mosley www.lakishamosley.com @lakishammosley Convo with Kisha www.convowithkisha.com @convowithkisha
with depression, bi-polar, grief, anxiety, and anger management issues have seen a drastic decrease in their symptoms. This research is showing daily exercise and personal communication with a real person minimizes mental health episodes. Exercise is known to activate the serotonin in our brain, promoting happiness and a sense of well-being. Hence, this is why we are adding personal trainers on our trips and offering virtual trainers to our members. Your mental health is essential. Learn to love yourself and take the necessary steps toward total happiness. Stimulate your mind, body, and soul by traveling and healing one mile at a time.
46 SWAGHER SPRING 2021
Q&A
DR. CARLENE RANDOLPH By Christina Woodard
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hristina: What is your SwagHer? What makes Carlene, Carlene? Carlene: Wow! There’s so much to be said in response to that question. Culmination of life events...starting at 24 years of age, I had a traumatic break up leaving me and my two young daughters living homeless in a car with our belongings---till now living my best life at 50. Those highs and lows, the tears and the happiness, gave me a depth and breadth of love, joy and peace creating me today. I am at the core a humbled spirit with lots of love and light. v Christina: Tell our readers about your business, Caism, LLC, and Women Ignite Now, LLC and now When Black Girls Find Joy, Inc. Carlene: Caism started out of 20 years of coaching women seeking a transformation in every aspect of their lives. Assisting them
in moving from chaos to simplistic living through personal and executive coaching services. We will be closing the doors of Caism next year because of plans for other projects. Women Ignite Now (also known as WIN) was created to inspire, educate and empower female entrepreneurs to build businesses that thrive beyond six years and build successful philanthropic activities for the communities they serve. We help them create a business playbook for a ten year period. In January 2021, we opened the doors of When Black Girls Find Joy, Inc. a nonprofit in the DMV. It has always been my goal to help 2,000,000 women globally to achieve their goals, reclaim their lives and improve their leadership skills. We create curated discussions, virtual/public events and so many other benefits through an application process
for membership. Christina: You are a life coach, author, chaplain, business strategist, and more. How did
Women Ignite Now (also known as WIN) was created to inspire, educate and empower female entrepreneurs
you get into all of these different things? How do you manage it all?
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Carlene: I believe we all are multi-purposed and if we are aligned with our calling then we are able to fulfill our mission. I make sure that I do not pick up projects that will not allow me to be great. Those projects and roles that do not align with my skills I say no to immediately. My virtual assistant and a host of others on my team keep me on top of the important things. Christina: Tell us about your radio show, Dropping the Knowledge with Cai Randolph. How did you get started with that? Carlene: Believe it or not the show started out on Blog Talk Radio as a bet between my youngest daughter and I. Back in those days, she was my cohost and we talked about everything and anything from the bedroom to the boardroom. By now means was the show a hit but we had loyal listeners and remained on that platform for about a year. I saw an opportunity to move the show to a radio station out of Atlanta and as God would have it the mountains moved and I travelled between Baltimore and Atlanta to make it happen. We kept the name of the show and of course, my co host got married leaving me to work out a new and improved radio show program. The audience increased in both Atlanta and Kentucky and so did my desire to do other projects. To date I have had a number of other internet based radio shows and TV show pilots. Looking forward to a new opportunity in the Fall of 2021.
years after graduating from Howard University, working for Johns Hopkins Hospital, and Georgetown University Hospital. I woke up one day thinking I could do more in healthcare besides bedside care. I wanted to be amongst those who could affect change in laws and regulations so I sought out positions in the federal government in policy and regulatory affairs. During that time my father was terminally ill and I was not happy with his health insurance coverage...thinking back I learned so much more about public health in underserved communities. I went to nursing school because my dad would not allow me to go beyond four years in college (that he was financially responsible for). I really wanted to be an anesthesiologist. It was that very reason that led to me to pursue an alternate route in healthcare not continuing in the nursing field. To answer the question of entrepreneur-
often we are the breadwinner; we are often the most educated person in the room; we are dope yet we bear the brunt of economic crisis (while holding frontline jobs and running small businesses). My ministry is to empower women of the Black Diaspora to become allies in our own communities and help one another “thrive beyond life’s pain.” Christina: Have you always wanted to be an entrepreneur? What did you want to be when you were younger? Carlene: We were taught in Sunday school that God was the Master Entrepreneur and he expected no less of us. I have always wanted to be a business owner. I designed and sold clothing in high school, then art. Later, I became interested in real estate investments and well 13 businesses later I still see a masterpiece in my gifts and talents. I never stop thinking about being a founder. It’s in my DNA.
For so long Black women have been named shamelessly by society (i.e., the angry black woman, thots, and the list goes on).
Christina: You have a new book out, “Total B: An Unapologetic Embrace of Boss-like Femininity.” Tell us about it. What is it about? Where can our readers go to purchase it? Carlene: The book is actually a couple of years old now. It is a self improvement book filled with pearls for the women who seek to live authentically and begin a process of healing to live in joy on the other side. Christina: In your bio, it says you have a bachelor’s in Nursing. Were you ever a full-time nurse? How was that experience? Why did you leave the nursing field to pursue entrepreneurship? Carlene: Yes, I was in the nursing field for 3
ship, well it was never either or for me. I have always had a passion for business ownership even while I was an employee. I believe you cannot be a good leader without being a good follower. My experience as an employee helped me have a greater respect for the role of the visionary leader. I can only hope I translated it well in my businesses. Christina: You have a doctorate in philosophy. Why did you choose to get a doctorate in that field? Carlene: It’s actually a doctorate of philosophy in theology. Folks are always surprised by that and yet by knowing God and defending my faith I feel more equipped to lead the movement of When Blacks Girl Finding Joy. I believe so deeply that when Black Women make the choice to declare joy in their lives it is radical and yet filled with a deep knowing of God and the life He wants for us. My ministry is in this movement. For so long Black women have been named shamelessly by society (i.e., the angry black woman, thots, and the list goes on). What I know is that
Christina: Do you have any upcoming events or projects you would like to share? Carlene: We are having our, JOY OVERFLOW Virtual Summit, May 22nd, 2021 from 9:00 AM through 8:00 PM. Queens get ready to unlock the code for a joy overload. We have speakers with messages from all aspects of life (from the bedroom to the boardroom and everything in between). This virtual experience is like no other. We can’t wait to share it with you. We will also unlock the membership community (by application only) at the close of the event. Connect with Carlene below: Website: https://www.whenblackgirlsfindjoy.com and https://www.womenignitenow. com Instagram: @coachcai1; @whenblackgirlsfindjoy Facebook: @chillinwithcoachcai; @whenblackgirlsfindjoy LinkedIn: Dr. Cai Randolph
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FITNESS
FIX MY F.U.P.A! By Beverly Johnson
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ight now, there are two schools of thought happening right now. Are you group 1: “Yes, I need help with my FUPA! Tell me what to do!” OR Are you group 2: “What the world is that?! Do I have it? Wait… didn’t Beyoncé say she had one?!” Regardless of the group, we all need help with working our abdominals. A FUPA is known by many names, but its official name is Fat Upper Pelvic (Pubic) Area. FUPA is an acronym for Fat Upper Pelvic (or Pubic) Area, and it is slang for fat in the lower abdomen area. In many cases, we can disguise in the right shapewear and outfit.
Here are some of my favorite moves to help build your core.
bringing the left knee forward to the right knee for your second rep. Do 20 reps, alternating sides.
What causes it? As you age, belly fat tends to accumulate — hence the term “middle-age spread.” You naturally lose muscle mass as you age, and excess calories are more easily stored as fat, particularly in the belly. Hormonal changes also make belly fat develop. Women in childbearing years tend to gain fat in their hips, thighs, and buttocks to supply a reserve of energy during pregnancy and breastfeeding. As their levels of estrogen drop during menopause, fat migrates more to the belly. Men always tend to develop belly fat, but there is no known physiological reason why. Once hormone levels of testosterone start to reduce in men after age 40, belly fat gain expedites. You can develop lower belly fat at any age, though. The food you eat daily plays a serious role. The Journal of Clinical Investigation in 2009 published a study showing that consuming a significant amount — about 25 percent of calories over just ten weeks — of fructose-sweetened drinks, including soda and fruit punches, increases visceral fat development. Other sugary foods can be to blame as well. Reduce your intake of candy, soda, and processed baked goods to help lose your belly. The more you stress, the fatter you may become. Stress, from bills, family, or work, causes you to produce more cortisol, a hormone that encourages your body to store excess calories as belly fat. Mindless eating and cravings for high-calorie, high-fat foods also accompany stress for a lot of people. (Excerpts from Livestrong)
Mountain climbers with a twist Your core muscles consist of your abs, obliques, lower back, glutes, and pelvic floor. These muscles help you maintain a good posture during exercise, as well as avoid injury. When doing mountain climbers, you will need to switch on those muscles to keep your hips from moving up and down or side to side. Focus on your obliques, which will make your waist look more defined; try doing twisting mountain climbers: Bring knees to opposite arms instead, without shifting hips. Start in a traditional plank — shoulders over hands and weight on your toes. With your core engaged, twist to bring your right knee forward under to your left elbow. Return to your basic plank to complete a rep. Switch legs,
Courtesy of Popsugar Fitness Reverse Crunch As a core-training exercise, crunches help improve your balance by strengthening your abdominal muscles. Strong core muscles improve your posture, which helps you function efficiently in everyday life and sporting events. A healthy posture also helps prevent lower back pain and muscle injury. The starting position: lie down on the floor in a traditional crunch position, your feet bent at your knees and hands under your head, or extend them at your sides. Press your lower back into the floor and lift your feet off the ground. Keep your knees together, bent at 90-degree angles.
THE BOSSY ISSUE 51 Using your core, pull your knees to your chest. Return to the starting position without touching the floor with your feet.
Courtesy of PopSugar Fitness Plank jacks Plank jacks may help strengthen the muscles
of the core. Plank and plank variation exercises activate all the core muscles, including the rectus abdominis, transverse abdominis, and obliques. They also activate the muscles in the hips and back. Begin in the plank position, with your shoulders over your wrists, body in one straight line, and your feet together. Strengthening the core muscles may also help reduce the risk for lower back pain. A strong core is important for proper spinal alignment. That, in turn, reduces your risk for back injuries. Begin in the plank position, with your shoulders over your wrists, your body in one straight line, and your feet together. Like the motion of jumping jacks, jump your legs wide apart and then back together to complete a rep. Jump as quickly as you want, but keep your pelvis steady and do not let your booty rise toward the ceiling. These are three great moves to incorporate into your regimen. Need help getting started with working on your FUPA? Let’s talk!
of authority.” At GenFit, we believe self-care takes priority over caring for others because it is in caring for ourselves that we make the best caregivers. We believe that by helping women rediscover who they are after suffering a loss, she will be empowered to become her ideal self – physically, mentally, and emotionally.
GenFit is a community of women who recognize the need to reclaim their lives and are emotionally ready to do the work with Beverly K. Johnson, motivational life coach, fitness trainer, and “girlfriend
THEGOODELEARNINGEXPERIENCE@GMAIL.COM INFO@NIKKIGSPOT.COM FB: @THEGOODELEARNINGEXPERIENCE, @NIKKIGSPOT, @UNCOVERINGYOUWITHNIKKIG CLUBHOUSE: @NICOLERGOODEMA IG: @NIKKI_GSPOT
SEXOLOGY TUTORIALS AND WORKSHOPS
SEXOLOGY AND SOCIOLOGY COURSES
INDIVIDUAL AND COUPLE CONSULTATIONS
WELCOME TO ADULTHOOD
52 SWAGHER SPRING 2021
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LaTosha Donaby, Making Strides by Allison Ashby
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aTosha Donaby is recognized in and out of the medical field for her gentle and caring spirit and her love for helping others. Whether it’s speaking a word of encouragement or simply offering a polite gesture, she believes in treating others how she wishes to be treated. Her motto is to always keep a positive outlook and wean out negativity. She has a clinical background and is equipped with expertise in helping individuals become self-sufficient. LaTosha supports the well-being of all people by continually securing provisions to foster better mental and physical health. Throughout her professional life, LaTosha maintains certifications in Nursing, CPR, and Phlebotomy while working towards an Associates Degree in Occupational Therapy. Her goal is to ensure that her patients leave her services with a more positive outlook on life. Rarely do her patients leave an appointment without a smile on their faces, nor do they fail to compliment her on the services she provides to them. LaTosha grew up in the city of St Louis, Missouri, being one of seven siblings. Although she grew up in what would have been considered the city’s heart, she was not the typical city girl. She didn’t hang out much, and because she had five older brothers, she was a bit sheltered from many things in life. This resulted in her being very shy, growing up. At a very young age, she felt that she was different than other children. “I was always treated different, but in a good way. I was often called by the name ‘Hollywood,” she states. Though LaTosha doesn’t recall much about her childhood, she does remember her passion and love for modeling and acting. She can readily recall reading through magazines or watching television and finding it hard to focus without imagining her face in the picture frame instead of the face of who
was featured. To describe Donaby as ambitious is an understatement. She began modeling at the age of 15. She attended John Robert Powers Modeling and Acting Agency in St. Louis, Missouri. She had Improvisation Training with Ben Carson On-Camera Acting with Robert Vito, the John Robert Powers’ workshop Acting and Modeling for the Camera, and additional voice-over and improvisation training. The Lou’ native competed in the Ms. Junior Teen USA Pageant. Her modeling resume also includes commercial and print, working as the Midwest Institute’s promotional model and a model for a DiGiorno Pizza ad. She participated in the theatrical stage play, The Skin of my Teeth at the Clayton Community Theater, the Lupus Fashion Show, and in I Am Exquisite Red Carpet in St. Louis. She appeared in the movie Mom and Dad, starring Nicolas Cage and Selma Blair. She acted in the stageplay A New Husband For Christmas, written
I’ve always been told that I have a way with people.
by playwright Kyria Williams. The young actress feels there is a direct
correlation between many of her hardships and triumphs in life to never meeting her biological father. The search for her father finally came to an end in 2018 after discovering his obituary via the internet. After searching for him for the majority of her life, it was unfortunate that the two never met. He had been deceased for two years prior to her internet discovery. “This, I would have to say, was my defining moment. It pushed me to fight even harder for my dreams and for what I believe in.” She was raised in the church, attending on the weekends sometimes with her late godmother, Doris Logan. She testifies, “I’ve always been a believer and a person with strong faith. My belief in God has brought me through situations that only He could have worked. I fought hard to become the woman I am today, and with God’s grace, I’m still standing-- stronger than I’ve ever stood before!” This new year has brought Donaby some great news. She has signed with a publishing company and has a book coming out this summer. Be sure to follow her social media accounts to get updates. AllisonJanel: How would you describe your SwagHer? What makes LaTosha, LaTosha? LaTosha: My personality, I would have to say that I am a people’s person. I’ve always been told that I have a way with people. I guess it’s the God in me, which allows my personality to shine, which has always drawn people and opportunities to me. AllisonJanel: What sparked your interest in acting? LaTosha: Acting has always been a dream of mine since I was a little kid. I remember watching my favorite television shows, telling myself that’s going
54 SWAGHER SPRING 2021 to be me one day. AllisonJanel: What happened in your life that made you want to explore working in the medical field? LaTosha: I’ve always had a passion for helping others. It’s a blessing to me to be able to help others that are in need. AllisonJanel: If you could describe yourself in one sentence, what would it be? LaTosha: I am a very positive, outgoing, Godfearing, strong-minded woman of faith who believes anything is possible with God. AllisonJanel: What concepts have you been working on to make your brand bigger and better? LaTosha: I would have to say a prayer. I’ve worked on getting my prayer life and my relationship with God stronger over these past few years so that way, I’m able to hear Him more clearly. I’m allowing Him to direct my path. AllisonJanel: Who do you look up to? LaTosha: I look up to God because He is where all my help comes from. Alongside Him, I would have to say, my mom. She’s a strong woman. AllisonJanel: How do you balance your time between family and acting? LaTosha: My family comes first, then my career. I spend a lot of my time talking to God before I do anything, which is how I usually get my day started. I find that by consulting with Him first, I’m able to find the balance I need to juggle in between everything.
I spend a lot of my time talking to God before I do anything
AllisonJanel: How is your relationship with your mother? LaTosha: I’m very close to my mom. Part of the reason I do what I do is because of her. I want to continue to make her proud. She’s a very strong woman.
THE BOSSY ISSUE 55 AllisonJanel: What’s the secret to your success? LaTosha: Prayer and keeping God first. AllisonJanel: Can you tell our readers something about you that you haven’t covered already? LaTosha: I’m usually very shy, an introvert. So this is taking me outside of my comfort zone. You have to be willing to do something that you have never done to reach your full potential to reach your destiny. Afraid and all, this is me letting the world know that you haven’t seen the last of me. This is just the beginning.
be someone that you are not. Be yourself. Last but not least, to pray for clarity and confirmation from God. AllisonJanel: Where do you see yourself in 5
an extra quickly turned into being offered a role. I remember shortly after walking into the building. I was told as I entered that I was wanted in front of the camera. It all happened so fast. It was a blessing to have been a part of it.
I see this moment as my defining moment marking the beginning of supernatural breakthroughs and miracles.
AllisonJanel: What can our readers expect from you in the near future? LaTosha: Lead speaking roles in movies, more print modeling. I’ll be working towards finishing my book. I want to be able to give back to nonprofit organizations geared towards helping the less fortunate. AllisonJanel: What advice would you give to a young woman wanting to pursue her dreams of acting? LaTosha: I would tell them to follow their hurt and to pursue their dreams. Never allow anyone to stand in the way and believe in yourself even when no one else does. Don’t allow society to make you
years? LaTosha: I see myself with a strategy for prosperous and successful living. I see this moment as my defining moment marking the beginning of supernatural breakthroughs and miracles. I’m living as a debt-free print model gracing the cover of magazines, taking on leadership roles with “author” on my list of accomplishments. AllisonJanel: How did you cope with grieving and healing from the death of a father that you didn’t have the opportunity to meet? LaTosha: I looked to God for strength and healing. He put it in my spirit to start writing, which has helped me get through it—so allowing myself to write about it. In return has aided in my healing process. AllisonJanel: How did the opportunity of staring in A New Husband For Christmas come about? LaTosha: I met the writer Kyria a few years back. I was promoting my business at the time, and she mentioned she was a writer, then mentioned that I should audition for a role which was for a stage play she had written. I told her I would but never got around to doing it. A few years passed, then a friend of mine tagged me in a post on social media for the movie, A New Husband For Christmas, which was also written by Kyria. Wow was all I could say. Look at God. He allowed me to cross paths with the same person from the stage play years ago. I’d once again missed the actual auditions, so I agreed to work as an extra. What started as me working as
AllisonJanel: Where do you see yourself taking your acting career? LaTosha: I see myself doing Christian based movies working alongside some of the best in the industry. AllisonJanel: What has been your greatest accomplishment in your life LaTosha: I would have to say becoming a mother and role model to my kids and everyone who’s ever looked up to me no matter the field or profession. AllisonJanel: Do you have any upcoming events or projects that you care to share? LaTosha: While Covid may have put a damper on a lot of things, I am working on auditioning for a few lead roles while working on getting my book finished and published in the near future. AllisonJanel: Is there anything additional that you would like our readers to know? LaTosha: Blessings and stay safe! Connect with LaTosha below: Instagram: @cherokee_mariee Facebook: Cherokee Mariee
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ARE YOU ON CLUBHOUSE YET? by Patrice Rivers
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ocial media is always booming with new apps and technologies for users and people worldwide and internationally to tap into the next best thing. Besides Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, Snapchat, Tik Tok, it’s now Clubhouse that has taken an immediate liftoff, bringing in millions of iPhone users. Did you say iPhone Users? Yes, I sure did! When Clubhouse was first launched last year during the pandemic, the founders weren’t sure about how it would hold up, but ladies and gents, we have a winner! Clubhouse has officially launched, and people have been rolling in on the audio and invite-only app on iOS. It is mentioned that Clubhouse is invite-only. Of course, the app name has the hint “club” itself and is only for people who get an invitation. Besides being another social media tech-savvy social community, it has grown to be a great business tool and “meeting space” for millions of business owners, entrepreneurs, authors, and even creatives. The Hallway of Knowledge If you tap into the app almost every day, you should be familiar with the hallways and make you or break you in business. The more people you follow and the more clubs you follow, your hallway will become busy and filled with excellent knowledge. Since the pandemic wiped millions of businesses and the economy
at grief, many people tap into their creativity and create new businesses. It’s a great way to discover talents you never thought you had before. With Clubhouse, everyone wants to promote their brand, offer their services, advice, proper knowledge, or look for good conversation. After all, after the pandemic shut down many social events, some people may just be looking for a great discussion. But if you are serious about making new connections and offering your services, then Clubhouse is the place to be! Here are some tips when entering some of these rooms. You never know if your next client is in there who needs your services or even your encouraging words. Be careful when entering the rooms! Go at your own risk! I say this because there is a lot of CH space that is not on there for business. They open up these inappropriate rooms, and once you accidentally enter the room (that happens), you are on your own to whatever the topic is. Look at the titles of these rooms while you are in the hallway. A lot of them do have a catchy name for business tips and hack tips. Once you found that right space, enter it and soak up all the gems the moderators are giving and the speakers on stage. Join clubs and follow people that have similar interests as you. Everyone has different interests
when it comes to joining clubs and conversations, and with CH being the next best thing of discussions, it allows people to enter the rooms based on the people they follow and the clubs they join. If you are a writer and poet, then following poetry clubs and writing groups would be ideal. If you are a media correspondent, you want to follow other journalists, bloggers, and publicists and join clubs related to media. Join clubs and meet new people! Promote your business every day! One great thing about CH is that you have unlimited opportunities to go on stage and talk about your business and what solutions you can offer other business owners and authors. That is the best thing about this app, and it’s worth the conversations and staying visible in front of your brand. There you go, ladies and gents and of course all the iPhone users, the good of CH. If you are on it, continue to promote your brand until everyone knows what you do, continue making great connections, and lastly, go up on stage and speak about your business and how your business adds value to others. You never know who is out in the audience listening to you talk and is inspired by your words or motivated to start their own business or write their book because of your presence of being on stage.
58 SWAGHER SPRING 2021
Meet The Correspondents
Natalie Louis The Queen’s Corner highlights women in business doing remarkable things. Hostess Natalie Louis has created a space where people can get to know the women behind the brand/movement. Natalie is an author, speaker, and breakthrough coach. @natalie.louis Watch Live on Facebook: @swaghermagazine
Beverly Johnson Are you ready to live a healthier lifestyle, but you aren’t sure where to start? Coach Beverly, The Fitness Deva can guide you! Every weekend, Coach Bev discusses various health and fitness topics and answers questions. Beverly K. Johnson is the CEO of Genesys Fitness and a life and wellness coach. @bevkjohnson Watch live on Facebook every Sunday: @ swaghermagazine
Delayna Jasper Sit Down w/ Delayna Downs is hosted by Delayna Downs-Jasper, a corporate flight attendant, who tends to interview professionals with a belief in giving back through mentorship or other good deeds. @d.e.l.a.y.n.a.j.a.s.p.e.r Delayna’s segments are usually via Facebook: @swaghermagazine
Chrisnatha Derosier The Masterpiece Lounge w/ Chrisnatha Derosier is an hour of inspiration being poured into you by Certified Life-coach Chrisnatha. Chrisnatha guides us through self-work with thought-provoking questions, routines and tips to help viewers become the best version of themselves. Watch live every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday at 11 AM CST on Facebook: @swaghermagazine @chrisnatha
Jessica Canty Jessica Canty hosts SwagHer What’s Going On (WGO) segment live on Instagram, interviewing special guests and sharing career advancement tips. Jessica Canty is the founder of Proverbs 15:22 Personal Growth Coaching LLC, a company focused on coaching melanin millennial moms who want high achieving careers. @jessicacanty
Terra Fontentot Terra Fontenot-Beard hosts SwagHer What’s Going On (WGO) segment live on Facebook, interviewing unique guests and sharing accounting and operations tips for small businesses. Terra is the founder and CEO of Fontenot & Associates Solutions LLC, which provides accounting, operational, and outsourcing solutions to businesses. @terra_font96 Watch on Facebook: @swaghermagazine
Claricia Lange Sweet-N-Reel is a live conversational segment hosted by Claricia NewberryLange, aka Mrs. Louisiana Universal 2019. Whether it’s Claricia’s frequent co-host Tyra or a guest co-host, Claricia takes the sweet side of a chosen subject while the guest gives their real take on things. @mrslouisianauniversal2019. Watch live every Thursday at 7 PM CST on Facebook: @swaghermagazine
Brittany Passion In the More Than a Pretty Face collaboration with The Passion Xperience and its CEO Brittany Passion, Brittany sits down with celebs, influencers, and creatives to discuss their gifts, lives and stories all in a motivational and unapologetic way. Brittany is an actress, model, radio personality and talent scout. @brittany_passion @ thepassionxperience
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GET FOCUSED
Focused Credit Solutions Kash Lanier, Owner fb: Focused Credit Solutions IG:@focusedcredit Twitter: focusedcredit Www.focusedcredit.com customersupport@focusedcredit.com
THE BOSSY ISSUE 61
Jussie Smollett and the MAGA Hat That Never Was By Chelli Stanley
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t’s been two years since Jussie Smollett reported that he was attacked by two men who called him a F—-t N—-r, and then told him, “This is MAGA country, N—-r.” The Chicago police immediately became outspoken, giving constant updates to the public, holding press conferences, and going on TV shows, culminating in publicly building what they considered to be an airtight case against Jussie. They indicted him and charged him with 16 felonies for lying to them. You see, Jussie never reported a red hat. He never said anything about a MAGA hat. One of the witnesses, a Sheraton hotel guard who saw the two attackers running from the scene immediately after the attack, also did not report a red hat. In fact, both Jussie and the guard gave the Chicago police (CPD) the exact same description of the man they saw: a White man, 6ft tall, wearing a black face mask. (p39 & 237). Neither Jussie nor the guard saw the second man’s face. The second man purposefully hid his face from the Sheraton guard, which is noted in CPD’s February 1st, 2019 report. (p237) During the interview on ABC, Jussie clearly stated there were no red hats, saying, “I never said that. I didn’t need to add anything like that. They called me a F—-t. They called me a N—-r. I don’t need some MAGA hat as the cherry on top of some racist sundae.” He also told this to CPD directly. On January 30, 2019, the day after the attack, he told Detective Murray, (who, incidentally, has been formally accused of using homophobic slurs against a Black man) that he “never said anything about a MAGA hat.” (p260) But, by that time, the story had already taken on a life of its own, and most people believed that the attackers were wearing MAGA hats. If only CPD had listened to Jussie, then CPD would not have revealed their own misconduct so intricately, so astonishingly, so stunningly, for all the world to see. Because, no one reported a red hat. However, many people throughout the world will remember seeing a photo, which was used as proof that Jussie lied, that there was no hate crime, and that he and the Nigerian-American Osundairo brothers were involved in a preposterous hoax. The detective who says he found the video of these brothers buying a red hat is none other than Detective Richard Hagen, who was sued by Laquan McDonald’s family for covering up a Chicago
police officer murdering the child, after Laquan was two Nigerian brothers buying a red hat. shot 16 times. The City of Chicago paid $5 million Yes, if CPD had only listened to Jussie, who told to settle the lawsuit. them that he never said anything about a MAGA Detective Hagen reports that to find this red hat hat, and if only CPD had read their own initial povideo, he engaged in investigative work that is a lice reports which said nothing about the attackers little difficult to believe. wearing a red hat, then CPD could have avoided a Detective Hagen and his colleague Detective stunning spectacle. Parages report that they searched beauty stores to Because, not only did CPD fabricate evidence, see which ones sold red hats and discovered that they incompetently fabricated the wrong evidence only one did. (p320) They went to this store, and on the world’s stage. Detective Hagen writes that “at the suggestion of They did this, of course, after they hid all the vidDetective Parages, Detective Hagen checked the eo evidence and witnesses that clearly showed there video at around 10 am.” (p347) was at least one White masked man at the attack, What luck for Detectives Hagen and Parages! and after they lied repeatedly to the public, telling With just that much work, they were able to us that they found no videos or witnesses at all. “observe two subjects enter the store and purchase But, CPD never really did listen to Jussie in this several items, which included gloves, face masks, case, after he reluctantly reported the hate crime. and a red hat.” (p347-348) They didn’t listen to Jussie about what the attackers Detective Hagen‘s report focuses intently on the looked like, they didn’t listen to him about what red hat. He writes that various camera angles show the attackers were wearing, and they definitely the brothers with the red hat, including walking didn’t listen to him when he told them about a hate “around the isle with a red baseball cap in hand” crime. and walking “to the counter placing several items Instead, CPD took the story and put their own on counter, including a red hat.” (p348-349) spin on it so that it literally became CPD’s story Detective Hagen says he found the red hat video that the world heard. But, in the end, a simple red on February 16, 2019, when the Osundairo brothMAGA hat will be their undoing. In the end, that ers were at a hotel under CPD’s “24-hour surveilvery MAGA hat will clear Jussie’s name. lance and security” (p355), supposedly to protect In the end, a MAGA hat will reveal to the world the brothers from the media. The brothers were put that CPD brazenly lied to us all, wasted all of our under this “24-hour surveillance and security” after time, and purposefully confused probably a billion being subjected to police misconduct during their people, who have remained confused for two interviews. years. In the end, the MAGA hat that never was The Osundairo brothers were under “24-hour will be the thing that puts CPD under the gaze of surveillance and security” until CPD took them to the world, but this time, everyone will be looking testify at the grand jury on February 20, 2019, the directly at them. very same day the video of them buying a red hat **If you want to read the police reports and check was leaked to the media and broadcast widely, caus- page numbers, see this document: https://www. ing quite a stir. The next day, Jussie was indicted by scribd.com/document/411963195/Jussie-Smollett CPD, who declared that he was nothing but a liar. While CPD may have, in the short term, seemed like A community where Black they built an airtight case Women can talk their stuff! against Jussie, what they actually did was greatly overplay their hand. Because no one reported a red hat. No one reported a MAGA hat. CA ND ACE @B L ACKG IRL S R IG HT. C OM Yet CPD focused their inA safe space for women of color to have open, raw conversations. It is my mission to let women of color know vestigation on finding stores our feelings are true, valid and honorable. that sold red hats, and then Instagram:@blackgirlsright Twitter:@blackgirlsright very easily found a video of
BLACK GIRLS RIGHT
Candice Rodriguez
62 SWAGHER SPRING 2021
Closure is Overrated! 3 Tips to Jump Start the Healing Process
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et me start by saying that it is normal to want closure, because in some situations people are left feeling incomplete. What I have learned is that the real issue is not “closure”, but getting the last word or the opportunity to plead your case! Stop focusing on what you could have said or done differently. Focusing on what could have happened, leaves you stuck in the endless cycle of the woulda, coulda, shoulda’s. Stop rehearsing the pain because it only provokes your anger and it doesn’t allow the healing process to begin. The mind has a way of putting all of the characters in place, repeatedly when we have been hurt. I don’t know about you, but there have been some times when I wanted an individual to pay for hurting me or not affording me the opportunity to say my peace, then and only then, was it over! Ask yourself, did rehearsing the pain help? Stop trying to fill in the blanks with the possible ways that your situation could have ended, it will drive you crazy! Process the emotions. As a society, we have learned to stuff down every negative emotion that comes our way because we may be looked at as being weak for actually not being okay. How many times has someone asked you if you were okay and you were not? But with your great manners, you said “I’m okay”. When you need to cry, then cry and when you need to vent, then vent. I must say, do not say it to everyone that will listen. Have a good friend that you can confide in and let that person be your sounding board. Find a positive outlet, something that you enjoy doing to assist with positive distractions. Don’t give no one that amount of power in your life! Take your power back! I don’t care who that person is or what you’ve gone through, stop giving away your power. Often, you will hear people say that they need closure, but they are looking for something that may never happen. Waiting for closure puts your life on hold. Many of us are analytical and things must fit together, for it to make sense to us. Unfortunately, there are times where things just won’t make sense, or fall in to place the way that we think they should. Don’t stop living because a person that has hurt you, failed to apologize or acknowledge the pain that they caused. People that can’t own up to the part they played in the destruction of a relationship or pain that they have caused, are living their best life! Get un-stuck! Live your best life! Give yourself permission to heal without closure and let go of the pain.
by Anika Ennett
THE BOSSY ISSUE 63
64 SWAGHER SPRING 2021