TCI Parent Magazine Christmas Edition

WINTER 2016

FREE

A Christmas Specia l

Avoiding Premature

birth

Dealing with

Holiday Stress Christmas

on a budget

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FERTILITY & PREGNANCY 16 Avoiding Premature Birth

While important growth and development occurs throughout pregnancy, the final months and weeks are especially relevant.

18 The Great Escape

From waking up in the morning, getting their kids ready for school, making breakfasts and lunches, going to work, coming home, making dinner and repeating the whole thing over and over, day after day, it seems moms never truly have a break.

LITTLE ONES 20 Teaching kindness and compassion

Sometimes, children can be mean. Yes, they can be very mean. This is not cute, this is not a sign of maturity, and this is not acceptable.

Content 22 How to get your kids off sugar this Christmas

That’s 10 pounds per month, or over a quarter of a pound of sugar PER DAY. We wonder why our children are overweight and being diagnosed with Type II diabetes.

25 Handling your child’s diagnosis

So what do you do when your child is diagnosed with a serious disability?

Of course, the top priority is taking care of your son or daughter and ensuring they receive proper medical care from pediatricians and other developmental specialists.

TWEENS & TEENS 36-37 Mother to daughterHealthy self-image

Starting in early childhood, our selfimage is influenced by interactions with parents and caregivers.

Cover Photo

Mr. & Mrs. Reuben & Tiersa Hall Daughters Brooklyn & Lyric & son Kade Hall.

Read cover story on “My journey to motherhood” pg 12-13

Daughters imitate and identify with their mothers in powerful ways.

39 How much internet time is too much time?

There are so many vastly contrasting views on this subject that it’s hard to know where to begin sometimes - so let’s start with what the experts recommend.

44 Dealing with holiday stress

Christmas is a great time for families and friends to come together and celebrate. It brings much joy, love and laughter.

HEALTH & WELLNESS 46-47 Sticking to your New Year resolution

Gyms become packed with new members, who come out in full force, to engage in the latest trends of exercise classes and diets with one goal in common - to get rid of those unwanted pounds.

editor’s note What Parents are Talking About PUBLISHER

Creative Designs EDITOR

Patrina Pierre A DVE R T I S I NG S A LE S

Nidra Ganness tciparentsmag@gmail.com DE S I G N & PRO DU C T I ON

Creative Designs WR I T ER S & CONT R I B UTO R S

Chenice Peniston-Williams, Hope Stafford-Regis, Heather Bernard, Rebecca Payne, Kimberly Wallace, Robin Bardegett, Yolande Robinson, Thea Lowe-Gangasingh, Maxcia Rigby CO N T RI B U T I NG PHOTO GR AP HERS

Attimi Photography and Eva Lakhani Turks & Caicos Parents Magazine is associate with Bermuda Parent Magazine but is published by Creative Designs every three months. Reader correspondence, photo submissions and editorial submissions are welcome. We reserve the right to edit, reject or comment editorially on all material contributed. No portion of this magazine may be reproduced without express written consent of the publisher. The opinions expressed by contributors or writers do not necessarily reflect the opinions of this magazine. Distribution of this product does not constitute an endorsement of the products or services herein.

CO NTAC T US

tciparentsmag@gmail.com Tel: 954-708-5299 www.tciparents.com facebook.com/TCIParents

A Christmas Special This is my favourite time of the year.

A time to slow down and be grateful for all the things in our lives, and to reflect on the birth of our Saviour Jesus Christ. Not forgetting the gift giving. I have always heard it is better the give than to receive, but none the less we all don’t mind being on the receiving end.

So remember this Christmas it’s not the size of the gift that matters. In fact, the best gifts may not necessarily be a physical one at all. As I age, the more I realize that spending quality time together as a family and with the ones we love, is a gift in itself.

This edition features buying Christmas gifts on a budget pg 23 and tips on Dealing with the Holiday Stress pg 44. There is also a great recipe for the traditional Christmas Cookies pg 42-43 that we so all loved as kids growing up.

The rest of the issue is all about family fun and out little ones. We offer tons of other great information.

Follow us on Facebook, visit our website at www.tciparents.com or send us am email at tciparentmag@ gmail.com. Don’t forget please share a copy with a friend.

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year from Turks & Caicos Parent Magazine

Patrina Pierre Editor notes

Alani Brice

Derek D. Hepburn

Eliza & Archie Hinks

Givelle Gordon

Allison Delgado

Deverleah Malcolm

Isabella Francis

Shanell Hall & Rodney Adam

Aleyah Ewing

Bailey & Pa

Deyzariah Pratt

Sieriah Wi

Rishith & Tejas

Deandrea, Denesha & Deasia

ayton Forbes

Delano Pratt Jr.

Celine

illiams

Jasmine Ajith

Treyvon Lorenz & TAnne Handfield

Caylen & CezannĂŠ Castillo

Del J & Dawson

TCI Parents

Want to see your child featured here?

Email a photo with your child’s first and last name to tciparentmag@gmail.com Malcolm

Davarri & Tyeisha Capron

Russell Gardiner Jr.

Jewel Autumn Grace Riggs

JaiiDon Saintange

Enarih Dickenson

Holly Miles

Rashane

Dukenya Dorisca

Ihsan Parel

Jake

Nylah Parker

A’Marii and A’miya

Ffion Cerys Prew

La’Mieka Bassett & Jan

Oliver, Alice & Samuel Fre

A Williams

Tyrell Ingham

e

nellie Stubbs

ench

Tanazh Gray

Jaylen Wynn

Lola-Reign Cook

Nadhlenny Mota

Justine R. Zamora

Kaeden Robinson

Leilani Amachee

Nathaniel A. Rigby

Kattalena Penn www.tciparents.com

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Sarai Russell

L’Shel Forbes

Preshanna Penn

Dauntez Cox 10

Adrien

Judah Rigby

Tranique & Michael III

Rajon Gardiner

Kadyn Hamilton

Robert K Forbes

Surai

Kaylani Handfeld

Melinda Jean-Louis

Shamya Forbes

Kailani Gremmer

fertility & pregnancy PHOTO BY ATTIMI PHOTOGRAPHY

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fertility

Courtesy Tiersa Hall

proposed and we got married in love, still holding on, praying and believing that God would come through and give us kids together when he was ready.

Sure enough, life has a way of reminding you about all the things you stress about. When I was struggling with my infertility, it seemed as if one by one all around me close friends and family around me were all expecting. All that did was allow me at first to feel depressed and even further stressed. There were many sad days but through it all I smiled through it and believed that God loved me and wouldn’t ignore the need I had to become a mom.

I celebrated as friends of mine one after the other got pregnant and had babies. Deep inside I was afraid and wanted to cry but I remained hopeful and my heart kept telling me that I would be a mom when God saw fit. All according to his plan.

Within four short months of being married my life was changed and my testimony was created. I was only one-month shy of starting a round of newly suggested drugs that the doctor told me I would need in order to get pregnant...I didn’t need them... the assistance of drugs and even Because greater than any then the chances of me responding medical assessment, any horrific pregnant would be slim. As if news, any pain I could feel was a that news couldn’t be anymore God who could change any and devastating, I had pains in my side everything! We were blessed with that led to me discovering that I a beautiful angelic calm-spirited also had a blocked tube due to and happy son who we call King a previous surgery leaving scar Kade! He is truly a gift from God tissue. I spent many years of my and my promise to God was that life even wondering if I could even when this boy was born that I have a child. would give this testimony.

My boyfriend at the time (now As if God’s greatness in my husband) new my condition granting a child wasn’t enough, and stood by me despite the 6 months after my son was possibilities. I knew he wanted kids born I found out I was pregnant from the moment we first started again. I wasn’t even ready for dating because that was one of that kind of news simply because his first three questions “how many I was on birth control and we had kids do you want to have? “. He made the decision to at least wait another year before we started

My journey to

motherhood

A

little over 10 years ago during a routine visit with my gynaecologist, I discussed with my doctor that I was experiencing some pain and discomfort in my pelvic area.

She asked me a few questions and thereafter based on my responses and further tests and an ultrasound, I was diagnosed with a condition called PCOS. I was given two drugs Chlomid and Metformin to see how that would regulate my condition and the responses were unfavourable.

I was told that my condition was so affected that I wouldn’t be able to have children without 12

to try again. But low and behold, we got the great news that we would not be having one but two babies to join our family. Our Twin Girls Brooklyn and Lyric were born 1 month after their brother’s birthday. To me it felt as if the miracle pregnancy of my son restored my body and my ability to have children. A lot of the pains I experienced prior to being pregnant with him I no longer have.

Many women have been or are going through fertility issues.

Some have been successful and yet they don’t share their story leaving many of us going through the same thing feeling hopeless and alone.

I am proud of the challenge and the burden I bore because it allowed me to appreciate and love my children in a way many people won’t understand. With every picture I take of them, every hug and kiss I give them, I’m reminded of God’s goodness, kindness and his mercy.

He knew my heart and my greatest desires and he gave them to me and I will forever be indebted and loyal to him.

I wanted to share my story because many of us look into the lives of others and we have no idea the pain they went or go through. They think that because they don’t share their problems or challenges with the world, that they don’t exist.

Some like myself, choose not to complain or fall to pieces in public. I speak with God and cried with close family and friends briefly, but I also choose to walk positive and remain hopeful and thankful for life and the little things we sometimes take for granted.

To persons going through fertility issues I would like to say that you are not alone. There are many women who have fought the good fight and beyond that THEY HAVE WON! It wasn’t until after sharing my testimony on social media that I learned of so many other women who have struggled with infertility and since had many children.

Don’t give up on your heart’s desire but don’t overstress it either.

It wasn’t until I took a break from stressing over being pregnant that it happened all on its own.

You must believe in God’s power, accept his power and more importantly be content in your current situation. You must trust that whatever the decision he makes it’s for your own good. That was the most challenging part but

I accepted the possible fate that God’s will was for me not to have children. Even though my heart told me otherwise and I’m glad that the latter won.

I am a huge fan of women and I admire our strength, resilience and our ability to carry the pressures of those we love. I feel we need to encourage each other more especially through the challenges that life sends us. I believe that my story will help some women cope with their situations and more importantly it will bring more people in to see the power, the goodness, the brightness and the limitless beaming light that is our Father God. If one persons is inspired by what I have shared, I consider my goal achieved.

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pregnancy

Courtesy Bermuda Hospitals Board

Avoiding Premature Doctors sometimes need to deliver a baby early because of concerns for the health of the mother or the baby. If a pregnant woman is healthy and the pregnancy is progressing well, it is best to let the baby come naturally, in its own time. Although most babies born just a few weeks early do well and have no health issues, others may need extra care as the result of jaundice or breathing problems.

E

very expectant parent anticipates a safe delivery and a healthy newborn. While the vast majority of births do go well, there are times when a pregnancy does not turn out as planned. In Bermuda, about one in twelve pregnancies, or around 8%, will result in a premature birth, which is defined as a baby born at least three weeks before its due date.

While important growth and development occurs throughout pregnancy, the final months and weeks are especially relevant. The earlier a baby is born, the more severe his or her health problems are likely to be. Although babies born very preterm are a small percentage 16

of all births, these infants account for a large proportion of heath concerns. Some premature babies require special care and spend weeks or months in the Special Care Baby Unit. Most of these babies will do well, although some babies born quite early may face breathing and respiratory difficulties, visual problems, hearing loss or feeding and digestive problems.

Even if a woman does everything “right� during pregnancy, she can still have a premature baby. There are some known risk factors for premature birth, such as having a previous preterm birth. Additionally, although

Birth

most black women give birth at term, on average, black women in the USA are about 50% more likely to have a premature baby compared to white women in the USA. The reasons for this difference remain unknown.

Other known risk factors for prematurity are:

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Carrying more than one baby (twins, triplets, or more)

2 3

Problems with the uterus or cervix Chronic health problems in the mother, such as high blood pressure, diabetes and clotting disorders

4 5

Certain infections during pregnancy

Cigarette smoking, alcohol use, or illicit drug use during pregnancy

Doctors sometimes need to deliver a baby early because of concerns for the health of the mother or the baby. If a pregnant woman is healthy and the pregnancy is progressing well, it is best to let the baby come naturally, in its own time.

Although most babies born just a few weeks early do well and have no health issues, others may need extra care as the result of jaundice or breathing problems.

There are things women can do to improve their health, lower their risk of having a premature baby and help their baby be healthy. It is very important for women to quit smoking and avoid alcohol or drugs during their pregnancy. Expectant mothers should also visit a healthcare provider for regular medical checkups before and

during their pregnancy.

If you suffer from high blood pressure or diabetes, make sure you discuss this with your physician and ask how best to control this throughout your pregnancy. Also make sure you are eating a healthy diet and taking the prenatal vitamins your physician recommends.

It is important to take 400 micrograms of folic acid daily before and during early pregnancy.

Although preterm labor often begins unexpectedly, you should consult with your physician if you are experiencing symptoms your doctor may be able to help you and your baby.

Warning signs include contractions, where the abdomen tightens like a fist every ten minutes or more often.

Any unusual vaginal discharge

or bleeding should be reported to your physician immediately.

Let your doctor know, as well, if you are feeling pelvic pressure, like the baby is pushing down or if you are experiencing a low, dull backache. Cramping that feels like a menstrual period is another warning sign, as are abdominal cramps, with or without diarrhea. If you are showing signs of a premature delivery, your physician may prescribe medications to try to stop labour. In addition, you may be given steroids to help cells in your baby’s lung to mature, which in turn will prevent breathing problems.

You may also want to discuss breastfeeding with your healthcare provider. Breast milk is the best food for babies, whether they are born early or at term. Attending breastfeeding support meetings during your pregnancy will prepare you for getting off to a good start and avoiding difficulties.

Birth is a complex and wonderful process.

Fortunately, the outcome for most women is a full term, healthy baby.

Taking good care of yourself, avoiding cigarettes, alcohol and drugs and having regular check-ups with a healthcare provider before and during your pregnancy gives you and your baby the best chance for a positive outcome. www.tciparents.com

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pregnancy

By Mikaela Ian Pearman

The Great Escape

Spa Treatments offer big benefits for Moms and Moms-to-be

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others are probably the busiest people on Earth. From waking up in the morning, getting their kids ready for school, making breakfasts and lunches, going to work, coming home, making dinner and repeating the whole thing over and over, day after day, it seems moms never truly have a break. But from time to time, we desperately need one.

With all the stress of our daily lives and routines, scheduling some ‘me’ time is vital. Whether it’s spent going out for a run, walking the dog, reading a book or some other enjoyable activity, personal time is a necessary part of keeping moms happy and healthy.

One great way to de-stress completely is to visit the spa.

And I know what you are going to say: You don’t have time for the spa, or it’s too expensive right now.

But that hour in a therapy room can make a world of difference and drastically change your mood.

Pregnancy is a beautiful, natural condition. Our bodies evolve during nine life-changing months that are full of excitement and planning, but with the positive changes often come challenges.

These can include mood swings, nausea, back pain, heartburn, swollen ankles, breast pain, etc.

Pregnant women no longer have to suffer without relief. Prenatal massage a gentle, noninvasive approach to massage – can ease the discomfort, help prepare you for the labor, give you the emotional support of a caring practitioner and also bring back a sense of body-mind integration, all of which will result in deep relaxation and acceptance of your evolving physical form.

Prenatal massage is intended to relax muscles, improve lymphatic flow and blood circulation, and improve the future mother’s comfort by applying mild pressure and avoiding sensitive pressure points. Trained prenatal or pregnancy massage therapists should be aware of pressure 18

points on ankles and wrists and cautious in applying techniques to the lower back area as well.

Massage is not performed in the first trimester at all, so consultation with a therapist is a must prior to any treatments during pregnancy. Treatment for mothers-to-be is very beneficial, since prenatal massages relieve unpleasant symptoms like swelling, bloating, aches, pains and – of course – stress. Expectant mothers definitely need pampering to get away from stress.

Smith also recommends more traditional spa treatments for pregnant women.

Manicures, pedicures and deep-cleansing facials create a very relaxing, memorable experience for any mother-to-be. For moms, the spa can be a world apart from the real world, with its noise, hassles and endless to-do lists. Walking into a spa, shedding your clothes and cares, breathing in some exotic fragrances, and having nothing on your to-do list but relax and be pampered can be a great way to spend a few hours outside the home.

little ones ALAYAH MELODY PIERRE www.tciparents.com 19

little ones

BY Yolande Robinson

Teaching kindness

and compassion Children are generally very good receivers of kindness and compassion.

They tend to get it from their parents and caregivers all the time.

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e have so much going on in our world today that we have to wonder whether we are forgetting the importance of the basic principles such as kindness and compassion.

Sometimes, children can be mean. Yes, they can be very mean. This is not cute, this is not a sign of maturity, and this is not acceptable. I want to be blunt about this, because when we don’t encourage kindness and compassion in children, we have to remember that we are creating teens and adults that will lack kindness and compassion as well.

The key to raising a child who demonstrates kindness 20

and compassion is to begin by training our minds to notice kindness and compassion.

Yes, the minds of us as parents. When we notice it, we can praise it. This encourages more of the same behavior.

Kindness and compassion can seem like abstract values to children, so when we point out clear instances of kindness and compassion they gain a better understanding of what these virtues look like in reality.

Let’s use a basic example of praising behaviors to understand why we want to recognize and praise kindness and compassion.

Imagine you have a baby that is about to start walking for the first time. When they take these first few steps, we fill them with

praise, hugs, kisses, and smiles.

The baby starts to realize they are doing something that gets a pretty awesome reaction and is followed by all sorts of goodness. This encourages them to continue to build on this behavior. We continue to give them this attention until walking becomes a normal behavior and they see and feel the benefits.

So how does this relate to kindness and compassion?

If when a child is kind and compassionate towards others they are praised, they are more likely to continue the behavior‌ even when praise is no longer always there.

Children are generally very good receivers of kindness and compassion. They tend to get it

from their parents and caregivers all the time. When we help them become givers of kindness and compassion we escalate their feelings of happiness, improve their well-being, reduce instances of bullying in our schools and communities, and enrich relationships. These basic virtues are extremely powerful, not only to the receivers, but to the givers.

So how can we notice kindness and compassion? Help children become conscious of what they are doing. For example, if your child is picking up the toys, rather than just saying “thank you”, say “thank you for picking up the toys.”

If big sister, runs to comfort little brother when he takes a tumble highlight the fact that she ran to him to comfort him.

When actions contribute to the welfare of others, point it out. “You said thanks for having me over so that your friend knows that you appreciate them inviting you.”

You can also simply add a descriptive tag to an action in progress such as, ‘that was kind,’ ‘that was helpful, ‘that was thoughtful.’ When we do this, we are yet again moving from the abstract to the concrete. We are teaching our children what these qualities look, feel and sounds like.

By noticing compassion and kindness we are making our children more conscious. This consciousness helps to stimulate the development of higher centers of the brain that help our children to grow in a number of domains.

As parents, we need to model acts of kindness for our children to see. When we model it, and encourage and notice it within our children, we will see the behaviors increase. Remember, that we tend to get more of what we focus on.

Focus on the bad behavior, the behavior spikes.

Focus on the good behavior… you may find that you get more good behavior than you expect!

Seasons Greetings To our families in Turks & Caicos from Florida Prep

Florida Preparatory Academy • Tel: 321 723 3211 • *admissions@flprep.com • www.flprep.com

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little ones

Courtesy By Nichi Hirsch Kuechle

How to get your kids

D

OFF SUGAR THIS CHRISTMAS

id you know the average person consumes about 130 pounds of sugar per year?

That’s 10 pounds per month, or over a quarter of a pound of sugar PER DAY. We wonder why our children are overweight and being diagnosed with Type II diabetes.

Don’t those numbers bother you? Doesn’t it make you crazy to know we are watching our children die a slow death? My goal here is to not be overly dramatic, but to drive home that the problem doesn’t begin with them. The problem is not with our children, mama’s, it begins with us.

Yes, us. We buy the groceries; we say yes to the lollipop from the teller at the bank, we have the ultimate say over whether that second serving of dessert makes its way onto their plates. We set the stage for the health of our children. If our children are addicted to sugar, than it’s likely that we are too.

Let’s talk about the first step we need to take as parents.

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: Change Mindset When it comes to getting our kids off of sugar, the first thing we have to do is change our mindset. Often, sugary snacks and treats are the fastest go-to for bribery, getting our children to be quiet or distracting them while we get something done. It’s the first thing the grandparents want to splurge on: a trip to the ice cream store, stopping for a cookie at the coffee shop, the local bakery for a donut or simply the variety store for a little goodie.

We have it that sugary foods has a pay off and the pay-off is that our children will do what we need them to do (for a while anyway). The problem is that it’s the beginning of a vicious cycle that leads right into the trap of them eating 1/4 pound of sugar per day.

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: Be a Model How do we see it possible to un-addict our children from sugar when they know we grab fast food drive for lunch or put two teaspoons of sugar into our morning coffee? They see us eat whatever we want whenever we want to (because we’re adults, right?) and we still expect them to follow a code of ethics around foods.

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Living in a way we want our children to live is crucial. We need to exercise, be active throughout our day, and carry a water bottle. We need to make healthy choices when it comes to food. We can’t expect our kids to be vegetable eaters when we gag while eating overly cooked broccoli. Create a love for healthy eating together.

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: Give Them Responsibility Our communities are raising some pretty smart kids. Giving them some independence and responsibility around their food choices is important. If they see us changing our mindset and being more of a model, they can take on some responsibility around what they eat.

This can be by: • Choosing the items for the trail mix at the co-op • Being in charge of choosing all the veggies for the weekly salad • With set guidelines in place, maybe they get to take turns creating the breakfast, cold lunch, dinner or snack menu for the week • Baking homemade items together using coconut sugar, honey or maple syrup instead of brown or white sugar and noticing how much better they feel after they eat that cookie or bar Having healthy children means being healthy parents.

Christmas gifts on a

By Lynniece Nisbett-Garnett

I’ll be quite frank, if you are just starting to think about Christmas gifts and you have more than a couple to buy, you will probably spend more than you want to. The pressure ramps up if you are buying for kids that want the latest gadgets to boost their “cool” status. So what’s a parent on a budget supposed to do, especially in pricey Turks & Caicos?

Budget

Shift the focus

Encourage family and friends to join you in giving back to others this year. Acts of kindness are deeply treasured and they offer wonderful bonding opportunities! Washing a friend’s car or cutting a relative’s yard for the month are just a couple of ideas. You can also volunteer with a charity or church to prepare and serve Christmas dinner to a residential home or those less fortunate.

Create a theme for the holidays if you still want to celebrate. My family focuses on Jesus’ birth and we have a spiritual emphasis. Our decorations often include their pictures and crafts from church. Baking is another fun theme that I’ve explored with my girlfriends. Cellophane, twine and a handwritten note on parchment paper added a special touch to the cakes. Presentation is everything!

Be Honest

Have a conversation with your kids if your budget is restricted and let them know that Christmas in Bermuda will be different. Share the fact that there are many grown-ups who are working less or don’t have a job so that they understand that the money challenge is a community issue. Toddlers typically don’t have high expectations so talking to them may not be necessary. Children who believe in Santa Clause may need a variation however, and fairytales are perfect for that! Older kids may surprise you with their cost cutting suggestions so don’t be afraid to talk to them.

Keep it Simple

Take a moment to trim the list of people that you are shopping for. In our home we buy one gift for each person. If you have a large or extended family, see if others will agree to buying presents just for the children, setting a present price limit or doing a gift exchange.

Set a Budget

Setting a budget is essential to keeping the holidays merry and sticking to the financial plan is just as important. Once you figure out your total spending limit, take your shortened list and determine how much money you will spend on each person. To avoid the temptation of overspending, I’ve learned to leave my debit card in the car and only Christmas shop with my allotted cash. If you lack self-control, give the card to someone that you trust and have them check your receipt when you take back your card.

Plan Ahead

If you are intent on getting pricey gifts consider spreading your Christmas shopping over several months. One year, I started buying presents in January and was finished by September. I was able to take advantage of countless sales and skip the crowded stores. A better option for some is to set up a short-term CD and take out the spending money just in time for the holidays next year.

It’s Okay

It’s perfectly normal for a parent to want to fulfill the wishes of their child. Most youngsters’ want to have what their friends want and we want to see excitement on our child’s face and hear their joy from receiving that perfect gift. You are not worth less because you give them less your child will be okay.

The most important thing that you can give your child is to value family and friendships. And that is perfectly okay, it’s actually great! www.tciparents.com

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little ones

T

Contributed By: Josh F. McKenzie,

Children and Community

he art of parenting has many wonderful and exciting hats. As parents, we are teachers, chefs, safety nets, nurses, nurturers and play partners. One hat I have come to enjoy as a parent is what I call the “social helper”. In my professional work I am often speaking to clients and co-workers about social cognition and the Theory of Mind. This is the developmental stage where infants begin to slowly separate physical objects from thoughts (pretending a block is a car during play).

As this advances we see them gain the ability to predict the thoughts and intentions of others which is a crucial skill that many children develop at different times. This also gives them the ability to enjoy social interaction and build community.

In the first year of life a child develops social cognition through dedicated observation. I can tell you I have spent so much time just watching my little girl stare at faces studying their dimensions and purpose.

Furthermore, studies show that infants are more attracted to individuals who are social and have helped others gain something. Gaining something can refer to a friend offering you a biscuit and a coffee or making you laugh. We know scientifically that infants begin internalizing this at around 8 months and begin to desire social interaction, particularly when they can see they enjoyment it brings others. This is the early stages of your child building social relationships, community and developing empathy.

We also know that at around 9 months old infants begin to use their parents and others as tools to problem solve. Many studies have shown that infants will take a mother or father’s hand and move it towards an object they may want or to have manipulated that way. This strengthens the bond that an infant may have with social relationships which eventually generalizes to other individuals in his or her life.

So what does this all mean to the average parent?

It means that our children seek out social relationships at a young age. They seek out community of others who make them smile, help them explore and of course meet their basic needs. And even though all children pass through a stranger-danger developmental stage, giving them the ability to learn how to trust 24

Behavioural Consultant BA,ABA,VRA

others such as our friends, family or other infants is very important to their development as social beings.

The old adage that it takes a village to raise a family could not be more true and important. My wife and I have had many experiences where our daughter has cried when a friend she has already met has visited our home.

Therefore, we make sure to spend the time letting her adjust and explore this new person slowly. This is called the transitional stage. It is a length of time when a child is cognitively trying to understand if this new person does something positive similar to her parents.

As social helpers, a good strategy to ease the transition can be holding your child at a distance while letting her watch you laugh and smile with the new person.

Additionally, letting your child watch a new person pass you a toy that you play with can help. Over a short time, often under 10 minutes, your child begins to see the value of this relationship through your enjoyment and ultimately, they will slowly let this person into their social circle.

Be patient as regressions are not uncommon particularly if there are gaps in an individual’s visit to your home. You may have to repeat this trust process a few times but as children get older this understanding of safe social relationships through observing parents begins to solidify within their social cognition.

Ultimately, this can be one of the greatest, most rewarding skills your child builds. After all, none of us would be who we are if it wasn’t for the relationships of love and support that have influenced us.

Handling your child’s diagnosis 6 things parents should do for themselves

B

efore their children are even born, parents are already dreaming about the future…first smiles, first words, first steps and down the line, proud graduations and joyful weddings.

But for parents of special needs children, those dreams may never come true. For these parents, their child’s life will probably not be as they envisioned.

So what do you do when your child is diagnosed with a serious disability? Of course, the top priority is taking care of your son or daughter and ensuring they receive proper medical care from pediatricians and other developmental specialists.

Securing appropriate services and early intervention programs are key to starting them on the right path to a good life.

But, how do you handle these unforeseen and unexpected changes in your life?

It’s overwhelming to consider all the ways you and your child’s life will change, but that’s okay.

Like everything else in life, you can get through it, by following a few important steps.

BY Deanna Picon of Special Needs Parents Magazine

to have them every now and then.

This does not make you a bad person or bad parent it just means you’re human.

2.Take Your Time

Trying to adjust to a new life that you didn’t plan for or anticipate is difficult. You didn’t sign up for this any more than your child did.

It’s important to take as long as you need to process everything, whether it is days, months or years.

There’s no set timetable for healing and acceptance.

3. Separate the diagnosis from the child

Feel and Heal:

Raising a child with a disability does alter your life. However, it shouldn’t change the love you have for your son or daughter and the strong bond that naturally develops over time.

If you only look at the behaviors and challenges, you are allowing your child’s diagnosis to be the focus of your relationship. The positive alternative is accepting your child for who s/he is, understanding that they cannot be blamed for their condition and viewing the disability as just another aspect of your lives together.

Accepting your child has a disability is not easy. Parents experience a roller coaster of emotions such as denial, anger and hopelessness. You may feel sad, guilty or lonely at times.

Keep in mind that these feelings and thoughts are perfectly normal and are to be expected, given your new situation. It’s fine

Avoid Isolation Always remember, you are not alone, even though it can feel like you’re the only one in the world dealing with a child’s disability. It’s not your fault.

You didn’t do anything wrong.

There’s nothing to be ashamed about.

You have friends and family

1. Give Yourself Permission to

4.

who care about you. The support of others around can help you make it through the hard days, aid you in making good decisions, and provide the physical and emotional breaks we all need now and then.

5.Ask For Help If You Need It There will be times when all the challenges and stress get on top of you, and you just need an extra pair of hands to help you through.

There’s no shame in asking for and accepting help from family and friends. Contrary to popular belief, it’s not a sign of weakness.

It’s actually a sign of strength and courage to share your needs with others.

6. Don’t Place Yourself On The Backburner

With most of your attention and time focused on your child, it’s easy to forget about your own needs. But it’s important to take care of yourself. After all, if you don’t, who will?

Try to get at least six hours of sleep a night, eat properly and exercise. You don’t have to join an expensive diet plan or pay for a gym membership. A 30 minute walk, three times a week, is not only excellent for your heart; regular fresh air and exercise also benefits your mental health.

You may want to explore meditation or other relaxation techniques. There is plenty of free information on healthy eating on the Internet.

You Can Do This! www.tciparents.com

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little ones

BY Sherraine Fleming

Bringing Reading to life

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aking story time a time for interaction and conversation can be great fun! Share lasting moments with your child as you explore the various characters and adventures told in story books.

Reading is the perfect way to increase your child’s vocabulary, spark their imagination and encourage strong literacy skills.

Whether you have a baby, toddler or a preschooler, increasing their exposure to new words during story time is a great way to interact.

As parents, reading to your little one before bedtime, at the park or maybe during a cuddle time promotes a special bond. Book reading is highly contextualized, motivating and can help children to bridge the context of the story with their own lives.

Grow literacy skills by reading with your child, not to your child.

Most times we read to children as they sit and listen, although this is great, conversing and sharing thoughts throughout story will help bring the story to life. Have an ongoing dialogue: ask questions, wait, listen, and respond.

Probe and encourage your child to contribute thoughts and ideas. Showing interest in your child’s ideas will promote further dialogue and motivate use of their imagination as they share their thoughts. Reading to your child helps to strengthen comprehension as you discuss the book together, it can also help your preschooler gain alphabet knowledge, recognize print and build phonological awareness.

Ensuring your book is age appropriate will help determine if your child will be engaged and 26

interested in the story. Choosing a book that is too difficult or too simple may limit their involvement and interaction.

Make story time interactive and fun by expanding the topic by using props such as hand puppets or toys and respond to any comment your child makes. Alter your voice to mimic the characters in the story, show excitement and use different facial expressions while reading.

If your child is a discoverer, between the ages of birth to 8 months, talk to them as if they can talk to you. Use words like “Look, the baby is laughing!” and comment to any response from your child.

With a child who is a First Word User 8 months to 24 months, talk about the here and now and relate their messages to their lives. Ask who, what, and where questions to expand their messages. If your child is an ‘Early and Later Sentence User’ between the ages of 2 and 5 years expand their language and discuss the past, present and future.

Discuss with your child new ideas about the characters and use ‘think-

out-loud’ comments such as, “I wonder how the little boy feels?”

Create an interesting dialogue together by discussing the story and problem solving. When introducing new vocabulary, share relative examples and pair the new word(s) with real experiences.

This example of pairing will give your child the knowledge and correct context of the word, if they choose to use it while communicating or describing.

Your basic communication between an adult and a child should go back and forth at least five times, although it may vary based on the language stage of the child and familiarity of the book. Model turn taking with your child by talking then allowing your child to respond next, encourage discussion whenever possible.

Making story time a time for conversation and interaction is fun and can be very rewarding! Just imagine your child’s excitement and the learning experience gained while interacting during story time.

www.tciparents.com

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pregnancy little ones

can be combined with memory activities. Logic and skill should be applied to innovative lesson plans that prepare our students for the twenty-first century.

Mathematics can be gameorientated and dynamic; students can ‘do’ Social Studies in class rather than simply memorize timelines. Science should be experiential from kindergarten onward and involve all of the senses. Overall, all of the subjects can crossover nicely with the arts and languages.

From my studies I was learning that the arts could be used as a successful and enjoyable teaching tool for students in reading specifically and many other school subjects across various levels. So for that class period we used rhythm and feet motions to guide this student The more that a student is exposed towards a better understanding to and surrounded by the arts in a of literacy. He wasn’t bad or given week the more skilled they unable to concentrate. He was will be at executing creative thought a kinesthetic learner and sadly patterns towards academic and the neatly arranged desks and overall success. Children who quiet classroom were not able to become aware of the way that they support his learning needs. learn and are supported through school in this means develop a A Unique Education higher rate of self-perception than their student counterparts. By Perhaps there are many students fusing the arts with learning, the like him who are labeled as classroom becomes a place where ‘bad,’ ‘overly energetic’ or the whole child is developed. Art- problem students. These children, infused classrooms change our like all children have a unique perception of the traditional, sterile potential that can be supported desks, blackboards and worksheets through creative learning. and propel us towards a learning There is a positive relationship centre of unending learning between children’s involvement possibilities. in the arts and their ability to liberate themselves towards The Case for Creative being successful citizens in the Learning classroom and the community.

By providing our children with The solution to this problem lies the opportunity to experience in allowing for more creative and learning with all of their senses we critical thinking experiences in the are in fact allowing many types classroom. Colours and rhythm of learners a better chance at succeeding.

Art-Infused Learning

Preparing the next generation

The global world as we know it no longer desires employees who are simply able to recite information and follow orders. Gone are the days where the majority of jobs available were repetitive, singletasks that individuals had to perform to keep the assembly lines going.

Nowadays employers are searching for individuals who can synthesize information, apply it to the specific challenge and devise creative solutions to revolutionize the world as we know it. Students who are graduating from school this year will not be able to succeed in today’s world by merely displaying their knack for route knowledge.

The leaders of the twenty-first century must be the ones who are skilled at using strategy, application, critical analysis and creative thought patterns. These skill levels go beyond having the ability to take a test or recite a piece of literature.

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My early experience with Creative Education

Top trending toys this

Christmas

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ith Christmas right around the corner, toys are on every single child’s wish list. Dolls, cars, trucks and Lego are sure to make your child happy on Christmas morning.

But what if you had insight into the best toys of the year. What if we told you exactly what your child wants and where to get it.

We’ve done some of the work for you. We break down the hottest toy trends of 2016 and tell you where they are available.

www.tciparents.com

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pregnancy little ones

Courtesy The Mighty

Parenting a special needs child

When parents learn that their child has a disability or a chronic illness, they begin a journey that takes them into a life that is often filled with strong emotion, difficult choices, interactions with many different professionals and specialists, and an ongoing need for information and services.

Initially, parents may feel isolated and alone, and not know where to begin their search for information, assistance, understanding, and support. If you are a parent of a child with special needs child, you undoubtedly have bigger challenges to overcome than you ever thought possible. There may be days where you feel all alone in your struggle.

1

.

Parenting a special needs child does not make you a superhero.

Not even close. I lose my patience and raise my voice occasionally. My house is not always clean and sometimes they have cereal for dinner.

2

. Insecurities Sometimes I don’t know what to do. I’ve tried to read all the right books and surround myself with people, who can advise me about my child’s disabilities, but I’m the one who makes the ultimate decisions, and sometimes I do not know what the right decisions are.

3

. Experts on their own child’s I could never claim to be an expert on autism, or any other disorder, but I do know my child’s really well. When a teacher or doctor who has spent a short amount of time with my child wants to give me advice instead of collaborate, it is insulting.

4

. No different than other parents We all like to talk about our child’s. However, we probably talk about different things. Parents of special needs child’s tend to flock together and talk about our child’s disabilities and therapies and their school situations. We use a lot of acronyms like IEP, ESY, and ADHD.

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5

. Loneliness We are missing out on a lot of things that you take for granted.

6

. Exhausting Yeah, I know; all parents are tired. It’s not just the physical rest that we sometimes give up. There is so much stress. A disability often taxes a family emotionally. Typically developing child’s growing up. They learn to do things for themselves. They eventually leave home. Many of our child’s won’t.

7

. The Future We know where all the exits are, carry a bag of emergency supplies, and have a plan B in place at all times. There are these things called meltdowns.

They may look like temper tantrums to you, but they are not comparable at all. Meltdowns are not usually triggered by anger but come from anxiety or sensory issues. Meltdowns can ruin a gathering. Hoping for the best and preparing for the worst applies to the long term as well. Parents of special needs child’s

have to have very flexible plans for their children’s futures as adults.

8

. Expensive They require therapies, doctors, medications, and schools that typically developing children do not. One of the things we hear a lot is, “You get help with all of that right?” Just who is supposed to be helping us? Who? We mortgage our homes, take out loans, and work extra jobs. We use our savings and our retirement accounts. Parents of special needs child’s are often deep in debt.

9

. You hurt when your child hurt Sometimes our child has to do really hard things, academically, physically, or mentally. And we watch while they struggle. Sometimes our child’s’ pain, anxieties, and fears are incapacitating and there is nothing we can do to relieve them.

Sometimes while I watch I become physically ill myself.

10

. Encouragement, not pity We are proud of our child’s. We celebrate smaller milestones than you will for your child’s, but they are just as precious to us. We do not often feel sorry for ourselves. We are not ashamed. An encouraging

word means so much to us.

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. Clichés “Everything happens for a reason” and “God only gives special child’s to special people” are two of those. Neither of these things is true! If everything happens for a reason then children are abused for reasons. Cancer has a purpose.

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. Sometimes, once in a while, there are a few of us parents not many, mind you, but a few of us who feel guilty.

Did I do something to cause my child disability? What if we had started the early intervention sooner? What if we had tried harder and done more therapies?

Sometimes we think about these kinds of things… but mostly we don’t.

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. Rewarding The small things are often huge in our worlds.

The things we learn from our child’s and their struggles could never be taught using any other method. I had heard it before I had my own special child’s: “He has taught me more than I could have possibly taught him.” I used to wonder what that could really mean, imagined that I might know; but I did not.

I’m not sure anyone could understand without walking in the shoes we walk in. Its life lessons we learn.

By Maxcia L. Rigby

“Hey Mother of an Autistic Child”

Hey mother of an autistic child, I see what you are going through.

You say no one understands, But trust me, I do.

I have experienced the stares, And the long puzzled looks.

I have cried both sad and happy tears, So much, that I can write a book!

I see the challenges, The great successes and the pain.

I understand the confusion, The heartaches and strain.

Hey, mother of an autistic child, The world is on my shoulder too.

I go to bed late and wake up early, I worry a lot, it’s true.

Still, mother of autistic child, You are not alone in this fight.

As you grow and develop, God will make all things right!

Fight on, push forward, Journey on until the end.

For with much perseverance, Comes success my friend I know by now you are wondering, How I can declare all this in truth.

Because mother of an autistic child, I am you!! *God will make all things perfect in his time*

www.tciparents.com

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pregnancy little ones

5

BY Dana Obleman

Tips for a fun and stress-free bedtime

1. Give a five-minute

warning Nobody likes to be pulled away from what they’re doing without any kind of warning. For children this is especially true. They thrive on structure and routine to give them a sense of security and awareness of their own boundaries.

If you give them a warning letting them know that in five minutes, they’ve got to put away their toys or turn off the TV or computer and go brush their teeth, you’ll get a lot less resistance when those five minutes are up.

2. Create a regular

bedtime routine Children thrive on a bedtime routine that lets them know what’s coming so they never feel caught off guard. A warm bath, a couple of stories, maybe a glass of warm milk all these activities help the body and brain transition more easily from day to night and create a sense of calm expectation that allows sleep to come more easily.

A good time frame for a bedtime routine is 20-30 minutes in length.

3. A timer is your friend

When you’re busy having fun, five minutes can seem like an eye blink. No wonder kids get upset when you tell them playtime is over!

A timer is a great way to help your kids feel like they have more control over the situation and 32

Emilio Butler

defuse the power struggle. After all, it’s not YOU who are saying it’s time to put the toys away it’s the timer.

Of course, in order for the timer to be effective it has to be the law which means you have to obey it as much as the kids do.

4. Set a story limit and stick to it “Just one more, Mommy!”

How many times have you caved in to that request? The problem with caving is that your children will expect you to do it every time. And on the nights when you don’t give in, they won’t understand why you’re not playing according to the established pattern and this can make them feel confused and upset.

That’s why it’s good to choose a specific number of books (our family limit is two) and then always read THAT number and no more. It creates a sense of expectation and security that will help your children fall asleep more easily.

5. Follow through with

consequences If your kids have never followed a bedtime routine, you may experience some resistance when you try to introduce one. If your kids complain, act out, or ignore you, the best thing to do to remain calm and consistent and let them know exactly what the consequences will be if they refuse to do what you ask. Then you absolutely have to follow through on those consequences.

For example, if you have to ask your kids three times to stop playing their video game and go brush their teeth and they just ignore you, there should be some sort of meaningful consequence for that. Maybe it means you won’t read them a story because there isn’t time for one.

Of course you will all be sad to miss out on story time that night, but you can be sure they will listen to you the next time you tell them to brush their teeth!

www.tciparents.com

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tweens teens Teens &&Tweens

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tweens & teens

Courtesy Total Health Magazine

Mother / Daughter Healthy Self-Image

Because daughters unconsciously identify with their mothers’, all mothers have the power and responsibility to shape their daughters’ positive self-image. This is achieved by teaching daughters that a female’s value is not based only on outer appearances, but on her inner essence, by talking to daughters in sensitive ways throughout life, and by authentic self love and acceptance. In doing so, mothers can go a long way to ensure their daughter’s future mental, emotional, and physical health.

B

eautiful, intelligent, kind, friendly… what characteristics do you consider when describing your daughter? Would her descriptions match yours? Would you use similar words to describe yourself? Or would you use less flattering words such as ugly, overweight, or plain? The term ‘self-image’ is described as the personal view that we have of ourselves. Self-image is formed from the combination of our views of ourselves, how we think others see us, and how others actually see us. According to the Mayo Clinic, mothers are probably the most important influence on their daughter’s self-image.

Starting in early childhood, our self-image is influenced by interactions with parents and caregivers. Daughters imitate and identify with their mothers in powerful ways. Mothers’ of daughters’ are like mirrors reflecting back to them an image of themselves. Add to this our experiences with others such as teachers, friends, and family. Our relationships reinforce what we think and feel about ourselves.

The image we see in the mirror may be a real or distorted view of who we really are. This results in positive or negative self-image.

With a positive self-image, we recognize and own our positive 36

attributes and potential, and are also aware and accepting of our limitations. Having a negative self-image means we focus on our weaknesses and limitations and have a distorted view of our failures and imperfections.

This is an on-going process throughout life. We are constantly evaluating ourselves across many areas such as appearance (how do I look?), performance (how am I doing?), and relationships (how important am I?). The development of positive self-image is important because it affects how we feel about ourselves and how we interact with others. A positive self-image boosts our social, emotional, physical and spiritual wellbeing. While having a negative self-image decreases life satisfaction across these areas.

A mothers’ tone and body language about her own self-image can affect her daughter in the long term. Even when mothers provide positive feedback about their daughters’, making negative comments about themselves negatively impacts their daughters’ self-image. Similarly, mothers’ negative comments about other women can also impact her daughter’s view of herself. When mothers accept how they look, and have a healthy attitude about weight, wrinkles, and aging, this

helps to counter the peer and media pressure her daughter faces. Similarly, when mothers don’t feel they measure up to society’s beauty standards, they pass on those feelings of inadequacy to their daughters.

Even the slightest comments that a mother makes about herself, such as, “Does this outfit make me look fat?” or “Oh wow, look at the awful wrinkles around my eyes” will influence her daughter.

The good news is that self-image is fluid and can be changed. We can foster the development of a healthy selfimage in our daughters and ourselves. The process begins with accepting and loving our self and being accepted and loved by others.

Because daughters unconsciously identify with their mothers’, all mothers have the power and responsibility to shape their daughters’ positive self-image. This is achieved by teaching daughters that a female’s value is not based only on outer appearances, but on her inner essence, by talking to daughters in sensitive ways throughout life, and by authentic self love and acceptance. In doing so, mothers can go a long way to ensure their daughter’s future mental, emotional, and physical health.

www.tciparents.com

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pregnancy tweens & teens

Contributed By Northshore Medical & Aesthetics Center

Emotional impact of Acne

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ore than 85% of all people experience acne at some point in their lives, according to the American Dermatology Association. Acne is the most common skin disorder and affects 40-50 million people and more than 40 percent of adolescents having acne or acne scarring that requires treatment by a dermatologist.

Acne scars not only require the attention of physicians, but are also proven to have psychological and social implications. According to an independent study, 71 percent of those surveyed feel that their scars from acne negatively affect their selfconfidence.

The unfavourable influence acne scars have on a person’s self-esteem and selfconfidence is a concerning social issue that cannot be ignored. Acne scars are without a doubt a skin condition that can have long lasting physical, emotional and psychological effect on individuals.

We encourage all who are negatively impacted by acne scars to recognize Acne Awareness Month by educating themselves on tips for making a positive change in how they feel about their situation, as well as seeking treatment.

To help teens build positive self-esteem and address the emotional impact associated with acne scarring, below are some tips : Acknowledge your potential and value who you are In order to inspire self-confidence and create a healthier self-image, you need to first respect and value yourself and acknowledge your full potential and capability. Taking appropriate action to respect yourself, while understanding your worth, leads to happiness and an overall better attitude. Because the mind is a powerful tool and our thoughts undeniably affect our 38

words and actions, fighting the emotional scars of acne can be difficult, but can start by simply changing the way you think about it.

Seek treatment and know your options The burden of acne scars is significant and can sometimes seem impossible to overcome, but know that you have options. Consult with a dermatologist and get educated on available treatments, while also seeking an overall healthier lifestyle. Living a healthy life, combined with the right treatments, are steps in the right direction for achieving the face of confidence you’ve always wanted.

Consider therapy Psychotherapy can make a critical impact in helping a patient cope with, and feel positive about, a difficult situation. Alleviating psychological distress through talking with a qualified physician may assist with how you view the negative aspects of your acne scars.

How much internet time

By Katherine Burchill

is too much time?

I

n a world where most adults now use the internet as their main source of world news, their first mode of communication with peers, family and even work colleagues, and (with the rise of Netflix and Youtube Channels quickly overtaking other forms of media) their first choice for household entertainment realistically, when it comes to time spent online, how much is too much? And where do we draw the line for our kids?

There are so many vastly contrasting views on this subject that it’s hard to know where to begin sometimes - so let’s start with what the experts recommend.

The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommends that kids under age 2 have no screen time at all, and that kids older than 2 can watch no more than 1 to 2 hours a day of quality programming.

This can be a hard pill to swallow, as a parent myself I know I’m guilty of popping my 18 month old in front of a cartoon when I’m struggling to get dinner cooked and on the table, or it’s 98 degrees outside and my nearly 4 year old is bored and hot, so I sit him in front of a cool fan with a movie on.

We all do it! What I think is most important to take away from the AAP’s recommendations is the words “quality programming”.

Rather than beating ourselves up over quantity, I think it’s really important to focus on the quality of what we are allowing our children to absorb.

Here are some tips and tricks for not just cutting down quantity,

but building up quality when it comes to ‘screen time’: Watch programs with your kids, choose things that reflect your values, try to create a discussion about it. If something you feel is inappropriate happens in a show (discrimination, drinking/smoking, fighting) turn the program off and use it as an opportunity to let your kids know how you feel, and to ask them questions: “Do you think it was OK when those men got in that fight? What else could they have done? What would you have done?” Teach your kids to question and learn from what they see on TV and online so that when you’re not around, they make the right call.

Equal and Fair - Make a list of the things your kid does each day: Chores, Reading, Outdoor Play, Playing Online, Socializing with Friends/Family and Homework then dedicates the same allotment of time for each, making them equal. It’s not a special treat, it’s just a part of their lives and you recognize that it’s important to them, so that they learn to recognize things like homework and playing outdoors are important to

you.

Rules across the Board - If you explain the things that are not OK in your eyes: bullying, violence or blood, sexual content or bad words, then those things are unacceptable in all aspects of life - “We don’t play violent fighting games outside and we don’t play violent fighting games online”. “We don’t use curse words with our family members, so we don’t use curse words when we chat online”.

Children can often disassociate themselves from their online actions. Teach them to recognize right from wrong in areas of life, including what happens online.

Be Respectful but also Realistic, children will always stretch the limits of the rules. Some privacy is only fair, but if you worry that your child is spending too much time online, or that the time is spent inappropriately; make the screens in your house more visible.

Place computers in the main family room, make sure TV’s and Gaming Consoles are kept out of your child’s bedroom, or that screens are placed so you can see them easily as you enter the room. www.tciparents.com

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tweens & teens

BY Gwyneth Rawlins

Finding the fun in Fitness and Nutrition

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s parents we all want our children to be healthy.

Keeping them fit and well-nourished aids their physical and mental development and improves their quality of life, thus making growing up a happy experience. But how do we encourage them to exercise and eat the right things without constant supervision and direction? The answer is simple – make it fun!

A universal truth of life is children like to play. If we can find ways to position healthy choices as attractive and enjoyable rather than preaching 40

about the benefits of being healthy, then we will be more successful in getting them to make healthy choices for themselves throughout their lives.

One way of making healthy eating more fun is to teach your children about where fruit and vegetables come from.

When deciding on family meals, involve your children in the process. Let them come up with ideas about which ingredients they want to use and then help them to search online for simple and nutritious recipes that include those items.

Another way of making healthy eating fun is to take an artistic approach to meal planning and preparation. For preschoolers, try using cookie cutters to create snacks and sandwiches in interesting shapes so they become more enticing.

Challenge your primary school age children to include as many different colours and textures of fruit and vegetables as possible on their plate as if they were painting a bright and colourful picture. You can quickly show them how a salad full of different ingredients can be much more interesting to eat than

artificially coloured sweet treats, which may be better marketed, but often lack taste and nutrition when you peel back their tantalising packaging.

be more appealing. Or, if they show more interest in skill-based games and activities, then tennis or golf might be more suitable.

With teenagers, the trick to promoting healthy eating is to link its effects to physical performance or appearance. Explain how food equates to fuel when it comes to sports and how foods can change our skin, weight and shape.

To get tween excited about exercise, try to come up with ways of moving their bodies that reflect the movements of a superhero, for example: Batman, Jumping Jacks, or Cat Woman stretches.

When it comes to getting your children to embrace regular exercise, try to demonstrate that there is very little difference between playtime and sports.

Oftentimes for school children, timetabled sport lessons become something they dread and an unflattering uniform might make them feel self-conscious.

So when the choice of exercise is removed, the fun factor is lost and exercise becomes synonymous with pain, misery and perhaps even peer rivalry. As parents, we need to work hard to keep the element of fun included. I’m sure we all have fond memories of running around a playground, climbing and sliding and discovering new skills, new heights and new friends. It’s important to harness the natural enthusiasm and channel it into other physical activities, as children get older.

There are many organisations in TCI that offer summer camps. This can be a great way to involve your children in a particular sport and hone their athletic skills during a more concentrated period than is possible during the school term.

Exercise should not be pitched as something children have to do.

The trick is getting them to want to exercise on a regular basis.

Therefore we need to observe what our children enjoy doing physically and provide opportunities that tie in with those activities. If they like going to the playground, then field games such as baseball, cricket, soccer, or hockey could be right for them. If they are into music, perhaps more artistic and expressive pursuits like dance, martial arts or gymnastics would

You could look into swimming or sailing lessons for your children so that instead of just splashing around at the beach, they can use their time in the water to get some exercise. Organised team games are a great way to develop social skills while improving fitness.

Remember, your support is important to children of any age. Take an active interest in sporting achievements and support prize-giving and presentations as often as you can. Having a personal cheering squad can only motivate your child more.

www.tciparents.com

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recipes

Christmas Cookies Ingredients Cookies 1 1/2 cups powdered sugar 1 cup butter or margarine, softened 1 teaspoon vanilla 1/2 teaspoon almond extract 1 egg 2 1/2 cups Gold Medal™ all-purpose flour 1 teaspoon baking soda 1 teaspoon cream of tartar Betty Crocker Decor Selects candy sprinkles, nonpareils or colored sugars, if desired Frosting 2 cups powdered sugar 1/2 teaspoon vanilla 2 tablespoons milk or half-and-half

Directions 1. In large bowl, mix 1 1/2 cups powdered sugar, the butter, 1 teaspoon vanilla, almond extract and egg until well blended.

2. Stir in flour, baking soda and cream of tartar.

3. Cover and refrigerate at least 3 hours.

4. Heat oven to 375°F. Divide dough in half. On lightly floured, cloth covered surface, roll each half of dough 3/16 inch thick. Cut into assorted shapes with cookie cutters, or cut around patterns traced from storybook illustrations. If cookies are to be hung as decorations, make a hole in each 1/4 inch from top with end of plastic straw. Place on ungreased cookie sheet.

5. Bake 7 to 8 minutes or until light brown. Remove from cookie sheet to cooling rack. Cool completely, about 30 minutes.

6. In medium bowl, beat all frosting ingredients until smooth and spreadable. Tint with food color if desired. Frost and decorate cookies as desired with frosting and colored sugars.

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www.tciparents.com

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family living

BYBy Yolande Robinson B.Ed., M.Ed.

Dealing with

Holiday Stress

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hristmas is around the corner and our children are bursting with excitement in anticipation of their holidays and what they might find under the tree on Christmas morning.

Christmas is a great time for families and friends to come together and celebrate. It brings much joy, love and laughter.

Amidst all the happy emotions, we sometimes find a little bit of stress and anxiety sneaking in because there is so much going on. So how can we be proactive about dealing with the stress and anxiety that might find it’s way into our household?

Put thought into your travel bags.

For older children, let them pack their travel bags and look to make sure they have chosen a few items that will keep them busy. For younger children and toddlers, you will want to make sure that you choose items that will engage them. You may even want to throw in a few fun new items that they have never seen, so that the novelty of these items keeps them busy. Bags with lots of hidden pockets can provide added pleasure during unexpected flight delays. If you are packing electronics, don’t forget to pack kid friendly earphones and to check whether the airline you are traveling with has a viewer’s app Having a schedule during the that you will want to download on holiday season may seem like an their devices while still in a Wi-Fi absurd idea to some, but remember environment. that most children thrive on routine.

Take some time at the beginning of the season to discuss any travel or activity plans with them, and the activities that they like to do when they are home from school. Your The holidays provide an awesome schedule may be as simple as opportunity to catch up with family outlining when outside play time, and friends near and far. During inside play time, meals and tablet the holiday time, children often see time occurs. Schedules can reduce family and friends that they may not anxiety and stress for both children have seen in some time. Although and parents. Do not forget to this may be quite exciting for you, schedule in nap time for little ones remember that if your 5 year old and establish a reasonable holiday has not seen a family member in bedtime for your older children three years, chances are they may as well. Sleep deprivation mixed not remember them. It’s tempting with holiday treats and excitement to push your child to give ‘Uncle is a combination that I know Joe’ a great big hug, or ‘Aunt many parents would prefer not to Monica’ a big kiss on the cheek, experience! but be mindful that some children

Have a schedule

Observe your child and adjust accordingly.

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may not find this comfortable. If they do not feel comfortable and are forced, it may send the wrong message to them as it relates to comfort and giving physical affection. Perhaps encourage conversation or high fives if your child shows hints that he or she is not comfortable with physical affection.

Focus on giving and gratitude It’s natural for children to be excited about the gifts that they will receive. As parents, we have to set the tone and ensure that our children understand that Christmas should involve just as much or more giving and gratitude than receiving. Go out of your way to name your blessings with them. Model gratitude and giving.

Make this a family affair and be intentional about the way that you do this.

Take care of yourself parents!

It’s a busy time parents. We know that we have both good stress and bad stress. Although Christmas often falls in the ‘good stress’ category, it still can feel a little bit overwhelming. So make sure you take care of yourself. Plan wisely, eat properly, get enough sleep and enjoy sharing the holiday season with your children, as once you blink…it will be over.

Have a happy and safe holiday season!

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aspire family living

BY Sandra Inacio-Hopper

Sticking to Your Resolutions

Long After the New Year

Staying motivated is tough when you are a busy and active parent. It’s great to have long-term goals, but celebrating little milestones along the way is at times just what you need to keep the motivation going.

E

ach year, during the first few weeks of January, people across the world vow to make “this year” the one they get in shape.

Gyms become packed with new members, who come out in full force, to engage in the latest trends of exercise classes and diets with one goal in common - to get rid of those unwanted pounds.

By February, most start losing interest. Springtime is here, and as the New Year suddenly feels “Old”, many feel discouraged, and return to a sedentary lifestyle. If you can relate to this and whatever your reasons or excuses may be, here are some ways to regain focus and keep your motivation going: Set resolutions that are realistic and based on your personal goals. Evaluate whether or not you have the skills to reach that specific goal, and skip the pressure of the “one size fits all”. Choosing a program that doesn’t suit you or getting caught up in the competition factor of certain programs can be intimidating and confusing. Over training and burnout is one of the main reasons people quit. A wise way to stay motivated is by “keeping it real” to what suits your fitness level and lifestyle.

Get support! Reach out to your family, friends or a small group who shares the same goal and can encourage you when your motivation 46

weakens. Unless you hold yourself accountable, it is easy to drift away or forget your resolutions all together. Make it a family affair if you will, or a healthy competition your family can enjoy.

Have your WRITTEN words visible around frequent places, not telling you WHAT to do, but WHY you are doing it. Every bit of motivation counts and you need it now more then back in January.

Take it a step at a time! To help you stay motivated throughout the year, pick a fun fitness-related event every quarter (three months) - this provides you with a specific training goal and something different and exciting to look forward to.

Spring clean your fridge!

Where do you begin? With all the fresh, brightly colored produce from our local farmers.

Stocking your kitchen with healthy clean foods, and not buying what

you shouldn’t be eating is in itself an accomplished goal that will provide you with the motivation you need to eat healthy. Keeping fresh fruits and vegetables at sight, is an easy way to quickly blend your favorite smoothie, or make that fresh salad for a healthy snack or lunch. Keep these three points in mind- Simple, Clean, Local.

Peak Season Taste!

In-season fruit and vegetables are picked and sold during their peak of flavor. Produce in season is typically darker in color, firmer and richer in flavor, especially in comparison to their out-of-season counterparts, which tend to lack in taste, leading us to stop eating it all together. Choose organic if possible and remember that the interactions between the senses of taste and smell enhance our perceptions of the foods we eat,

as we tend to stick to what tastes good Give the winter soups and stews a rest, and try new and refreshing spring recipes! Build a new recipe repertoire and enjoy! Between

March and April you can find in season Beets, Carrots, Lettuces, Spinach, English cucumber, Bok Choy, Tomatoes, Kale and Collard Greens, Swiss Chard, Papaws, Cabbage, basil, Cilantro and Chives, all grown locally. Engage your family as you prepare meals!

Kids love colorful foods and it’s a great way to show them that eating healthy can be fun when using Nature’s real color pallet.

The bottom line - It’s in the simple things! Missed your class today? Take your kids for a bike or Razor ride while you jog, or go walk on the beach, stretch and enjoy the sunset. Celebrate your “successes” and small victories as you learn from your “failures” without blame.

Staying motivated is tough when you are a busy and active parent. It’s great to have longterm goals, but celebrating little milestones along the way is at times just what you need to keep the motivation going.

Click the refresh button and focus on one goal EACH day.

Days will turn into weeks and weeks will turn into months. You can do it before you know it your January resolution will be what being fit is all about after all - a lifetime resolution. www.tciparents.com

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Wrap your newborn in comfort and protection so all he feels is

love.

Š2014 P&G

Wrap your baby in the blanket-like softness of Pampers Swaddlers.

The wetness indicator lets you know when it might be time for a change. And for our best gentle clean, try Pampers Sensitive Wipes.

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2 FORMULAS FOR EVERY SKIN TYPE NORMAL/DRY COMBINATION/OILY

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