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THE BEST YOU TRANSFORM • INSPIRE • MOTIVATE • ENRICH • EMPOWER • ENJOY AUGUST 2014 / PRICE £3.99
RAMAN RAHEJA Talks to us about bringing Kabaddi to the world stage
CHILDREN OF DIVORCE Janet Murray gives us some advice
PHARRELL WILLIAMS
THE MAN BEHIND THE SCENES HAS TAKEN CENTRE STAGE AND HE COULDN'T BE HAPPIER
INSPIRING QUOTES
IT'S TIME FOR FESTIVAL
WHAT DOES IT TAKE...
WE PICK OUR FAVOURITES AND TELL THE STORIES BEHIND THEM
EDINBURGH COMES ALIVE THIS AUGUST
TO BE A FASHION DESIGNER? WE TALK TO EMILY TONKIN
ALSO: WE DEBATE THE PROS AND CONS OF VIDEO GAMING
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AUGUST 2014
CONTENTS
REGULARS
5 EDITOR’S LETTER
Bernardo Moya welcomes you to the latest issue of The Best You
18 WE SUPPORT… Time to Change – fighting mental health stigma
29 BOOK REVIEWS We review some of our favourites – a small selection of what’s available
58 THE BEST YOU DIRECTORY Find the best coaches, trainers and practitioners here
16 TOP 10 INSPIRATIONAL QUOTES THE WORLD IS FULL OF GREAT QUOTES. WE LOOK AT SOME OF THE MOST INSPIRATIONAL AND THE STORIES BEHIND THEM
FEATURES
22 BECAUSE HE’S HAPPY
We profile Pharrell Williams – music mogul and all round happy guy
26 ROCKING THE KABADDI Raman Raheja is raising the profile of one of the world’s oldest sports
INNER YOU 10 PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT MATTERS
Oscar Del Ben tells us why personal growth is so important
12 REDUCING THE STIGMA
Kate Nightingale from Time to Change
tells us how to fight the prejudice against mental illness
ENJOY LIFE
16 TOP 10 INSPIRATIONAL QUOTES The world is full of great quotes. We look at some of the most inspirational and the stories behind them
22 BECAUSE HE’S HAPPY WE PROFILE PHARRELL WILLIAMS – MUSIC MOGUL AND ALL ROUND HAPPY GUY
19 IT’S THE GOOD NEWS
With so much of what we read in the papers being negative, The Best You is bringing you some good news
20 IT’S FESTIVAL TIME!
With the world’s most comprehensive arts festival happening in Edinburgh this month, we put together a guide on how to survive
THE BEST YOU No. 22 · August 2014 · Year 2 · EDITOR / PUBLISHER Bernardo Moya · DEPUTY EDITOR Zoë Henry · ASSOCIATE EDITOR Matthew Wingett · CONTRIBUTING EDITOR Gail Kingsbury · PROOFREADER Bryan Szabo · COPYWRITERS Aaron Wells and Peter Rogers GRAPHIC DESIGN Joanna Frackiewicz · NEW MEDIA Allan Banford TECHNICAL CONSULTANT Martin Carter · ADVERTISING advertising@thebestyou.co The Best You Corporation LTD 5 Percy St. · London, United Kingdom, W1T 1DG · Tel: +44 (0)845 230 2033 · www.thebestyoumagazine.co
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AUGUST 2014
CONTENTS
LIVE LOVE LEGACY
36 BASIC FIRST AID
Emma Hammett from First Aid for Life gives us guidance on what to do in an emergency
38 CHILDREN OF DIVORCE Janet Murray, our resident divorce expert, gives parents tips on how to make their separation easier on the kids
40 WHAT DOES IT TAKE… …to be a fashion designer? We chat with Emily Tonkin, Creative Director at 30:fifteen
FEEL & LOOK GOOD
44 F*** DIETS
40 WHAT DOES IT TAKE… …TO BE A FASHION DESIGNER? WE CHAT WITH EMILY TONKIN, CREATIVE DIRECTOR AT 30:15
Best-selling author Susan Hepburn says losing those extra pounds is all about eating mindfully
46 LIVE YOUR DREAMS It has always been Christine Meerman-Cooper’s dream to trek across Alaska. She did it and lived to tell us the tale
WEALTH & RICHES
50 THINGS ARE LOOKING UP
Michael Jacobsen gives some facts and figures that show the economy is on the mend
52 SNAKES AND LADDERS The earlier you can afford to get on the property ladder, the better. Vincent Wong from Wealth Dragons explains why it’s a wise investment
54 BE A MONEY MAGNET Dr. Rohan Weerasinghe gives us some advice about how to attract the right kind of wealth
56 THE ROCKY ROAD TO SUCCESS The Best You looks at some historical figures who didn’t have success handed to them on a silver platter
21 CENTURY LIVING ST
62 WHAT'S IN A GAME DR. NICOLA PALLITT AND JENNIFER CAVERHILL BATTLE IT OUT IN A DEBATE AS OLD AS TIME
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62 WHAT’S IN A GAME?
Dr. Nicola Pallitt and Jennifer Caverhill battle it out in a debate as old as time – do video games cause violence?
64 FEEL-GOOD GADGETS We look at some of the newest gadgets that have been designed to improve the quality of your life
THE BEST YOU
ARE YOU LIVING?
W
illiam Wallace said, "Every man dies, not every man really lives." So my question to you this month is are you living? Or are you letting time pass by? We are all very different, in so many ways. Some people focus on working and saving their money for a rainy day. Others focus on people and trying to make a difference in the world. And some people prefer to focus on learning from the way others have lived their lives by reading novels and autobiographies, or even watching movies and television series. Reading books and Watching movies and TV series can be great, but keep in mind that you are here on earth to live your own life too – not just to learn from other people’s stories. If you spend your whole life on your couch in front of a screen, what would the movie of
your life look like? How would your biography read? That said, it is your life, and there is no right or wrong way to live it. As long as you are reaching your full potential and learning along the way. Are you collecting enough memories? Are you spending enough time with your family, friends and loved ones so that you could adequately complete chapters or episodes of your own life? What is your life looking like? Is it a comedy, a romance, or an action film? Whether you are living your life to the fullest or find your self stuck in a bit of a rut, we could all use some inspiration from time to time. Whether it is to inspire you to keep doing what you are doing, or start a new chapter. In this month’s issue we have chosen 12 of our favourite inspirational quotes from wise people of the decades and centuries, and because quotes
EDITORIAL
can be better appreciated with a bit of context, we’ve given you a bit of a back-story to each quote. And if that’s not enough inspiration, we have a great story in this month’s issue from a woman named Christine Meerman Cooper, who followed her dream of trekking across Alaska with a pack of Malamutes. If you’re heading up to Edinburgh for the festival this month, be sure to check
our survival guide. Now there’s an event where you can make some great memories for the memoir. And our cover star Pharrell Williams has been an inspiration to so many, literally spreading happiness across the world. So me inspired. Make time count. Make sure you live.
Every man dies, not every man really lives.
BERNARDO MOYA,
Editor-in-Chief Follow me: @Bernardo_Moya
WE WANT YOUR STORIES The Best You is all about inspiring people. If you have a tale to tell that you think will help someone become the best they can be, please tell us.
video slider gallery
3600 gallery Hotspot
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THE BEST YOU CONTRIBUTORS
EMILY TONKIN
CHRISTINE MEERMANCOOPER
is a 33-year-old adventurist and Alaskan Malamute enthusiast. She lives with her husband, their two cats, and two Alaskan Malamutes. She now works part-time for a full-service marketing agency, and has a part-time legal audio typist and volunteer position for a fundraising group called Malamute Matters.
MICHAEL JACOBSEN
is a Fashion Designer and a Creative Director for the new women’s activewear brand 30Fifteen, which she launched in 2012. She is the heart and soul of the brand. As a part-time yoga teacher, she encourages women to find what it is they love to do, and do more of it.
@Ejtonk
is a qualified nurse, first aid trainer, and mother. She recently received a National Award as the ‘Most Inspirational Trainer’. Emma trained and worked at St Thomas’ Hospital in the 1980s and has since worked in both clinical and managerial capacities in many hospitals.
@firstaidforlife
JENNIFER CAVERHILL
JANET MURRAY
is a Master NLP practitioner and inspirational personal development coach. She is passionate about working with individuals to help them fulfil their personal and professional potential. The author of Essential Divorce Wisdom, Janet combines her intuitive and practical wisdom with a corporate background.
is a year 3 teacher at an all-girls school in Surrey, England. She finds the current levels of violence in the world disturbing, and, though she believes that people should be responsible for their own behaviour, she is quite sure that the violence in movies, television shows and video games isn’t helping.
is a lecturer in the Centre for Innovation in Learning and Teaching at the University of Cape Town, South Africa. Her PhD research involved observing children's digital gameplay in afterschool settings. She sees children as active media consumers who remix digital games and other forms of play.
@nicolapallitt
OSCAR DEL BEN
DR ROHAN WEERASINGHE
@oscardelben
@DrRoOfficial
is the guy behind Freestyle Mind. In 2007, while offering programming consulting to various start-ups, he became interested in personal development. Two years later, he started Freestyle Mind because he felt he had something to share.
specialises in human and corporate re-engineering. He is an author, professional speaker, and investor. He teaches and coaches people globally on transformational and communication tools that create personal and professional impact.
KATE NIGHTINGALE
is Head of Communications at Time to Change, England’s most ambitious campaign to tackle the stigma that people with mental health problems face. The campaign is run by the charities Mind and Rethink Mental Illness. She is responsible for its communications, brand, media, and digital activity.
@timetochange
@Janet_Murray
DR NICOLA PALLITT
is GEA founder, a serial entrepreneur, and a Global SME expert. He is prolific for his business success, primarily in the fields of entertainment, property, and technology. Jacobsen co- founded the global live entertainment brand Dirty Dancing and sat on the board of Australian-owned global coffee chain Gloria Jean’s Coffees.
EMMA HAMMETT
SUSAN HEPBURN
is a world-leading authority on weight loss. Her work with celebrity clients sees her moving between the US, Europe, and London’s Harley Street. She is perhaps best known for helping Lily Allen go from a size 12 to a size 8. A-listers flock to Susan for her discreet service and no-nonsense approach.
@susanhepburn1
VINCENT WONG
is the COO and cofounder of Wealth Dragons. Vince is one of the most dynamic and wellrespected property entrepreneurs in the UK. As well as building his own multi-million-pound property portfolio, Vince has helped countless people source and structure property deals through his property networking business.
@1jacobsenm
The Best You is published by The Best You Corporation Ltd, 5 Percy Street, W1T 1DG. Opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect The Best You Corporation Ltd, policy. The Best You Corporation Ltd accepts no responsibility for views expressed by its contributors. Advertisements and reader offers are not endorsed by The Best You or The Best You Corporation Ltd.
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THE BEST YOU INNER YOU
THE BEST
YOU
Life Without Limits
TM
Connect with the wonderful, special and powerful inside. Learn new ways to get your mind and body in balance, bringing out the rich core of your being. Discover the secrets that will enable you to take charge of your inner life and become The Best You.
PD MATTERS Oscar Del Ben tells us why personal growth is so important
REDUCING THE STIGMA Kate Nightingale from Time to Change tells us how to fight the prejudice against mental illness
WWW.THEBESTYOUMAGAZINE.CO | 9
INNER YOU OSCAR DEL BEN
WHY PERSONAL
DEVELOPMENT MATTERS
Oscar Del Ben has seen many articles
recently about why personal development doesn’t matter because you should be grateful for what you already have, but he has adifferent opinion.
W
hile I agree that we can be happy with whatever we have at any moment, I think that it’s a mistake to stop there without pushing ourselves out of our comfort zones. It stops our growth dead in its tracks. Accept any fact as given and shying away from value judgements is reductionist and it rarely leads to self-improvement. So what is the role of personal development in all this? Personal development allows you to discover new things and emotions that you couldn’t have seen before because of your self-imposed limitations. What happens when you ignore your growth? Look around you. There are countless examples of people who ignore their core areas of development. You only need to observe how they look and act to see what ignoring your growth does. There are a few key aspects to look at when working on your personal development. Let’s look at a few of them together.
INTELLIGENCE
From the first day of your life, you have been exposed to new things to learn, like languages, math skills, science, etc. This kind of exposure to new ideas slows down in your twenties when you leave school to enter the business world—unless, of course, you constantly study new things after you leave school. There’s a common belief that our brain stops growing after age 20 because we have reached its maximum potential. In reality, most people’s brains stop growing at that age simply because they don’t exercise it like they did in the past. This is a well-established fact among scientists. The effects of
mental laziness are clear: you loose your memory abilities and you are not able to concentrate on difficult tasks like you did before. This process is, of course, gradual, and it varies a lot from person to person, but eventually, if left unchecked, it leads to the same place. You may wonder what happens to people who continue to study and practice new things. If you look at history, people who exercise their minds like an athlete does his or her body are able to perform important tasks with ever-increasing speed and efficiency. Some of them even win special prizes at an age when other people are often retiring. Intelligence can and will grow at any age.
OSCAR DEL BEN
INNER YOU
Another important area to develop is your body. You can’t pretend to stay fit without training, and you can’t pretend to stay healthy if you don’t pay attention to your body. Both training and proper diet are important to prevent cardiovascular problems, injuries, and a lot of other common diseases. Giving up bad habits like smoking and abusing alcohol is vital for your body’s integrity.
You can’t pretend to stay fit without training, and you can’t pretend to stay healthy if you don’t pay attention to your body
OTHER AREAS OF LIFE
There are many other facets of life where it’s important to grow, like spirituality, sociality, and problem solving. I’ve seen many articles recently about why personal development doesn’t matter because you should be grateful for what you already have and enjoy the little things. Of course it’s important to be happy with what you already have, but that should not be an excuse to stop yourself from achieving even more in your life. While I agree that we can be happy with whatever we have at any moment, I think that stopping there without pushing ourselves out of our comfort zone is a huge mistake that can stop our growth dead in its tracks. Don’t rest on your haunches or your laurels – no matter how good your situation is, it can always be improved.
RECOMMENDED READING
The Best You website is packed with loads of great books, DVDs, CDs, downloads, free articles and reports. Check it out now: www.thebestyou.co
INNER YOU KATE NIGHTINGALE
REDUCING MENTAL ILLNESS STIGMA Mental health problems are common: one in four of us experience them in any year. But even now, nearly nine out of ten people with mental health problems say they face stigma and discrimination as a result. Kate Nightingale, head of communications at Time to Change, tells us more. his is why Time to Change exists. Run by the charities Mind and Rethink Mental illness, we’re England’s biggest programme dedicated to challenging mental health stigma and discrimination. Since the campaign began in 2008, we have made good progress towards improving public attitudes and behaviour towards those of us who’ve experienced or are experiencing mental health problems. But there is still a long way to go; we need to bring mental health problems out into the open and remove any shame and stigma surrounding them – individuals, employers, the media and schools all have a role to play in this. There are many things we can do as individuals to reduce the stigma of mental illness. For one, we can start being more open when we talk about mental health. If someone you knew had broken their leg, you would ask them how they are, yet when it comes to mental health,
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KATE NIGHTINGALE
people are often lost for words. Sometimes, just doing the little things – asking someone how they are or inviting them round for a cup of tea – is all it takes to let them know you're still thinking about them, which can make a big difference in how they're feeling. We’ve developed some really simple top tips cards with some of our supporters to try and help people start a conversation with a friend, family member, or colleague who’s experiencing mental health problems. Media portrayals and reporting – consumed by millions of people every day – are extremely powerful influences on attitudes towards mental health, both for good and bad. Time to Change has a media advisory service for journalists and programme makers who are looking for advice when reporting or doing a fictional storyline on mental health. This can prevent the reinforcement of damaging stereotypes that are so often perpetuated in sensationalist articles or storylines. In drama and soaps a recent study found that 63 per cent of references to mental health were pejorative, flippant, or unsympathetic. However, over the last couple of years our media advisory service has worked on nearly 30 mental health storylines including
EastEnders and The Archers, including putting researchers and writers in touch with people who have really experienced the issues that are being portrayed. We’re starting to see the results of this with more positive and realistic representations in the media. More people with direct experiences of mental health problems feel that their voices are being heard. Schools and parents can also play a huge part in tackling stigma by talking to children and young people about mental health. Attitudes are often formed at a young age, and many mental health problems also begin during the teenage years, so it’s important that parents and youth professionals feel able to talk openly about mental illness and tackle discriminatory language or behaviour when they see it. We do this by providing tailored materials for parents. We’ve also begun some pilot work in schools in the West Midlands and Kent and Medway that delivers anti-stigma and discrimination training to young people and teachers. It will mean teachers, children, and young people are better equipped to challenge stigma if they see it happen and also support their own friends if they have difficulties in the future. By making it easier for open conversations about mental health to happen both at home and at school, young people will know there are people around them they can turn to for advice and support. One of the most successful ways of reducing stigma and discrimination is when someone with experience of mental health problems shares their experiences with somebody who has never experienced
INNER YOU
In drama and soaps a recent study found that 63 per cent of references to mental health were flippant or unsympathetic mental illness first hand. Our research shows that attitudes, knowledge, and behaviours towards people with mental health problems are more likely to improve when you have the opportunity to learn from someone who has this personal experience. This is what Time to Change advocate at all of our events and through our grant-funded projects working in local communities across England and even online, through our many blogs written by people with firsthand experience of mental illness. Recent research found that Time to Change is having a significant positive effect on public attitudes and that stigma and discrimination in relation to mental health might be more prevalent without the campaign. We know that the work we’re doing with individuals, in schools, workplaces, and in local communities is tackling stigma and discrimination but we also know there is still more work to be done. Such will be the case until we can confidently say that no one is stigmatised or discriminated against due to a mental health issue. b
For more information or if you would like to get involved with Time to Change as an individual or a company, please visit www.time-to-change.org.uk
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NLP TRAINING INNER YOU ALEXANDRA TRUTA
with RICHARD BANDLER Co-Creator of NLP
in London PERSONAL ENHANCEMENT A workshop with Richard Bandler 6th - 8th Oct 2014
LICENSED PRACTITIONER OF NLP 13th – 19th October 2014
LICENSED MASTER
PRACTITIONER OF NLP 11th – 19th October 2014
Book today on +44(0)207 927 6500 www.nlplifetraining.com info@nlplifetraining.com 14 | WWW.THEBESTYOUMAGAZINE.CO
THE BUCKET BEST LIST YOU
ENJOY LIFE
THE BEST
YOU
Laughter, humour, travel, love - these add the sparkle that make life worth living. Climb a mountain, give to others, start a family, embrace life. What are the things you wish you had done but haven’t yet? Life is no rehearsal – find ways to enjoy it, whenever you can!
Life Without Limits
TM
TOP 10 INSPIRATIONAL QUOTES
The world is full of great quotes. We look at some of the most inspirational and the stories behind them
IT’S THE GOOD NEWS
With so much of what we read in the papers being negative, The Best You is bringing you some good news
IT’S FESTIVAL TIME!
With the world’s most comprehensive arts festival happening in Edinburgh this week, we put together a guide on how to survive
ENJOY LIFE
BUCKET LIST
TOP 12 Thanks to the easy sharing that social networking makes possible, inspirational quotes have become a ubiquitous part of online life. While these quotes can be inspiring, uplifting and thought provoking, they are often presented without context or attribution. Here are ten of our favourite quotes and the stories behind them.
4
“Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve” – Napoleon Hill
2
1
5 “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.” – John Lennon
“You miss 100 per cent of the shots you don’t take.”
“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life.”
– Wayne Gretzky
– Steve Jobs “The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now.” – Chinese Proverb
3
6
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“The purpose of life is to discover your gift. The work of life is to develop it. The meaning of life is to give your gift away.” – David Viscott
BUCKET LIST
ENJOY LIFE
INSPIRATIONAL QUOTES 7 “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” – Maya Angelou
10
We are all in the gutter, but some of
8
12
us are looking at the stars.” – Oscar Wilde
“Don’t believe the world owes you a
You must be the change you wish to
living. The world owes you
see in the world.
nothing. It was here first.”
– Mahatma Gandhi ”It always seems
– Robert J. Burdette
impossible until it’s done.” – Nelson Mandela
11
“Find what you love and let it kill you.” – Charles Bukowski
9
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WE SUPPORT Time to Change Time to Change is England’s biggest programme dedicated to ending the stigma and discrimination people with mental health problems face daily. The programme is run by the charities Mind and Rethink Mental Illness, and funded by the Department of Health, Comic Relief, and Big Lottery Fund.
I
n a given year, one in four people will experience a mental health problem. Despite how common it is, nine out of ten people will experience stigma and discrimination as a result of their illness. Time to Change want to empower people with mental health problems; they want sufferers to feel confident talking about the issue without facing discrimination. Time to Change runs a high-profile national marketing campaign that targets the three in four people who have not experienced mental health problems first hand, though they may know someone who has, including family, friends, colleagues and neighbours. The target audience are those who don’t realise the impact their attitudes and behaviours can have or aren’t sure how to speak to those with a mental illness. The national campaign is combined with funding for community activity, grassroots
anti-stigma projects, and a wide range of support programs for the mentally ill. The hope is that people with experience of mental health problems become active social leaders, starting and continuing important conversations about mental health. Evidence suggests that this kind of open dialogue (between the mentally ill and the community) is one of the most effective ways of ending discrimination and breaking down the stigmas surrounding mental illness. Work is also carried out with the media, a wide range of organisations, Black and minority ethnic communities, children, and young adults. Time to Change started in October 2007 and, since then, it has reached millions of people across England. Recent research highlighted that Time to Change is having a positive effect on public attitudes and that stigma and discrimination in relation to mental health
The campaign is combined with funding for activity, grassroots anti-stigma projects, and a wide range of support programs
might be more prevalent without the campaign. There is still a huge amount of work to do: Time to Change is committed to continue this project until no one has to face stigma and discrimination due to a mental health problem. Though there is a long ocean to cross, the tides are shifting in favour of understanding and compassion. We are finally starting to move in the right direction. b For more information or to get involved please visittime-to-change.org.uk
OTHER WORTHY CAUSES WE SUPPORT Teenage Cancer Trust
Katie Piper Foundation
Children Of The Night
www.teenagecancertrust.org
www.katiepiperfoundation.org.uk
www.childrenofthenight.org
SMA Trust
War Child
The Children’s Trust
www.smatrust.org
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www.warchild.org.uk
www.thechildrenstrust.org.uk
THE GOOD NEWS
BUCKET LIST
ENJOY LIFE
The news we read in the newspapers and see on the television is so negative that it can often feel like the media is conspiring to get you down in the dumps. That’s why The Best You is bringing you snippets of good news.
Drop in teen pregnancy
I
n 2008, a family planning programme in Colorado, USA called the Colorado Family Planning Initiative began. Six years later the results have been astounding: the teen pregnancy rate has dropped 40 per cent. The initiative provides intrauterine devices (IUDs) or implants at little to no cost for low-income women at 68 family planning clinics in Colorado. In fact, the drop in teen pregnancies in Colorado has been so significant that it has had an impact of the teen pregnancy rate nationwide, and since 2008, Colorado has gone from being 29th to 19th place on
the list of lowest teen pregnancy rates. The initiative isn’t without controversy, though. Since teenagers do not need parental consent to receive contraception, it has been said that the programme violates parental rights. But the good that the programme has done cannot be denied. “This initiative”, said Governor John Hickenlooper, “has saved Colorado millions of dollars. But more importantly, it has helped thousands of young Colorado women continue their education, pursue their professional goals and postpone pregnancy until they are ready to start a family.”
THE UN HAS A NEW FACE
W
e may part of her humanitarian know her efforts. Now UN Women, as the the United Nations bushyorganisation dedicated to haired gender equality and the know-it-all Hermione empowerment of women, Granger, but the star of the has made her their new Harry Potter series and Goodwill Ambassador. blossoming heartthrob has “Emma embodies the been putting her fame to values of UN Women”, good use. Emma Watson said Executive Director has been involved with Phumzile Mlambo-Ngcuka. the promotion of girls’ “The engagement of education for several years, young people is critical and previously visited for the advancement of Bangladesh and Zambia as gender equality in the
21st century, and I am convinced that Emma’s intellect and passion will enable UN Women’s messages to reach the hearts and minds of young people globally.” Emma confirmed MlamboNgcuka’s statement by saying, “Women’s rights are something so inextricably linked with who I am, so deeply personal and rooted in my life, that I can’t imagine an opportunity more exciting.”
Rocking in the free world
Afghanistan has hardly been an example of freedom and democracy, but they are well on their way. Two months ago, Afghanistan held their first-ever democratic presidential transfer. The presidential election in June of this year marked the firstever democratic transfer of power from one elected leader to another in Afghan history.
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ENJOY LIFE
BUCKET LIST
IT’S FESTIVAL
TIME!
Every summer, thousands of arts and theatre lovers gath Edinburgh to attend the Edinburgh Festival. For a first time attendee, this can be pretty daunting, so we have asked some festival veterans for their top tips on how to survive this year.
W
hen attending any festival – be it music, theatre, art, or as in Edinburgh, a mixture of everything – you need to be like a Boy Scout: always prepared. Some of us are planners and researchers and
will arrive in Edinburgh with a well-thought-out itinerary and plan of action, while other will arrive on nothing more than a wing and a prayer. No matter which category you fall into, we recommend reading this guide and getting some top tips from people who have braved the madness time and again.
Wear sensible shoes
Don’t restrict yourself to the centre
When we asked our festival veterans how they got around the city during festival time, we got a resounding, “Walk, baby!” So the first tip on our list has to be taking a pair of sensible shoes. Of course there are alternatives – the bus service has positive reviews, or you could rent a bicycle to get around the city centre. And there is even the possibility of splurging on a cab is you’ve had one (or three) too many whiskies. But the most common way of getting around seems to be walking.
Going to the Edinburgh Festival is a great excuse to see some of the city, as well as four to seven shows a day. Many stick to the centre and see show after show, but Edinburgh has so much to offer outside of the festival. “The festival is in the heart of historic Edinburgh”, says Colin, “so you should definitely fit in some time to explore. Arthur Seat, Carlton Hill and The Castle are all in walking distance, and Greyfriars Kirk is actually a venue. The National Museum of Scotland is also nearby and worth a visit.”
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THE BEST YOU
ENJOY LIFE
BE THE CROWD There is really no point in going to Edinburgh Festival if you are a people hater. There are people everywhere, and you will be travelling in a crowd wherever you go. “I get pretty fed up with the endless tourists and long queues. Normal local response!” says Zoe. “Edinburgh really comes alive in August”, Carine says. “There’s an air of positivity and a feeling that everyone wants to be there. The population doubles, I believe.” If you can’t beat them, join them.
Take the bad with the good
Mix things up
Edinburgh Festival is bound to be loads of fun, but every experience has its negative aspects too. For Jerome it was the food, which he found to be quite disappointing. He advises, “Do a bit of research before deciding on a restaurant or pub to eat at.” For Carine and Zoe, both one-time Edinburgh locals, dealing with the huge influx of people during festival time while they were trying to go about their normal lives was a challenge. “Think tourist-hell Covent Garden and multiply by two. Cattle prods should be standard issue for residents”, says Carine. Colin says street performers are both the best and the worst part of the festival. He perhaps-wisely suggests that eye contact should be avoided at all costs.
Perhaps you were thinking that catching shows at the festival should be like working out – focus on one aspect of the festival per day. But the advice from our veterans is to mix things up and go to a variety of theatre, art, music, and comedy, alternating between the main festival and the Fringe. “There’s so much to do, I don’t think it’s practical to theme your days”, says Carine. “Do some research before you go, book a show or two each day, and then leave the rest to spontaneity”, says Jerome. “How many shows you see each day depends on your stamina, but I think between four and seven.” This will, of course, require some planning. Zoe warns, “The venues are spread out across the city, so it would be wise to check distances and bus routes.”
Any accommodation will do
Leave reservations behind
If you’re one of the planners and researchers we mentioned earlier, then you probably have a beautiful hotel booked already. Carine recommends “Hotel du Vin, Missoni, or The Witchery in the city centre (just beneath the castle and properly atmospheric), or Prestonfield House is tucked off a residential street in the south of the city for a bit of peace and respite from the madness.” But if you still haven’t got a place to stay, Colin reckons, “Wherever you can find.” You probably won’t be spending much time in your digs anyway, so don’t be too picky.
Scots are known for putting away more than a wee dram or two, so there will definitely be your fair share of people staggering down the streets late at night. “It is Scotland, so what do you think?” laughs Colin. Actually, it’s all very safe and friendly, but as it gets later, expect some high spiritedness.” Carine confirms, “Longer licensing hours mean more booze and more drunkards. But you can avoid it if you stay away from the Grassmarket/High Street at night. Expect more rivers of puke in the streets first thing in the morning than usual. Gross, but true. Sadly.”
Sleep when you’re dead
Stick to your budget
Like Christmas, Edinburgh Festival comes but once a year, so don’t waste it by staying in your hotel room because the crowds are scary. Get out there and see, see, see. Go to a show you have never heard of, go to a pub that has a bad stand up comedian. It’s all part of the experience. “Even for a week or more I don’t see much point in a rest day”, says Jerome. “There is too much you could potentially miss.” Carine sums up the attitude the average avid attendee has towards rest days: “Rest is for Jessies (lightweights)”
When visiting a city, especially during the world’s most famous arts festival, it is very easy to spend more than you budgeted for. A more expensive show here and a night at the pub there – things could get pricey. But it is totally possible to have fun on a budget. “The fringe has a free programme every day on the Royal Mile, and with a Tesco around, you can do it on the cheap”, says Colin. “The beauty of the festival is that there’s something for every budget”, Carine says.
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BECAUSE HE'S
HAPPY Pharrell Williams has gone from being the man behind a thousand hit songs to being a globally recognised frontman for feel-good summer sounds and inspirational initiatives.
There is a longstanding Internet joke that Pharrell Williams is a vampire. How else can his agelessness be explained? Well, maybe it’s happiness. His baby face belies his 41 years. He has been a fixture of pop music, both before and behind the scenes, for years. He has achieved ubiquity through performing on mega-hits such as Daft Punk’s ‘Get Lucky’, Robin Thicke’s ‘Blurred Lines’, and his own summer hit, ‘Happy’. He is also a gifted polymath, overachieving as a fashion, jewellery, and furniture designer alongside his musical career. “I can’t get stuck doing only one thing”, he says. “I have to work with different people doing different things. It’s where my energy comes from. I am inspired by life in general: conversations, movies, reactions to things, everything.” Pharrell Williams was born in 1973 in Virginia, the oldest of three sons of Carolyn, a teacher, and Pharaoh Williams, a handyman. “I had a mum and dad who urged me to pursue music but at the same time were realistic about it. It just sort of happened, to be honest. I can't come up with a special inspirational story. It's mostly my parents who didn't shoot me down when I wanted to do it. Nor did they put too much pressure on me.” His interest in music was sparked when he met future collaborator Chad Hugo in a band camp. This is where they discovered their musical chemistry, with Williams playing the keyboards and drums and Hugo playing tenor saxophone. They went on to play together in marching bands and school house bands, effectively laying the foundations for future musical success. “Our ambitions were the same as any other kids that were studying music and being classically trained”, he says. “We did it because we loved it, and, you know, there's a genuine curiosity to want to know more and see how things work. Some of us get this amazing feeling when we hear music and we feel music, and we want to figure out how to continue to feel that.” In the 1990s, Hugo and Williams formed a four-piece “R&B type” group, The Neptunes, with friends Shay Haley and Mike Etheridge. They later entered a high school talent show where they were discovered by Teddy Riley, whose studio was next to Princess Anne High School. After graduating from high school, the group signed with Riley and kickstarted their recording career. “I'm often asked whether I foresaw that this was what I was meant to do. But you never know that when you're in the driver's seat, because you're in the present. And the present is a malleable moment that dies every second and is rebirthed every moment you get a chance to move forward, so you never know.” In 1994, Hugo and Williams had established themselves as a production duo under their old name, The Neptunes. They quickly became some of the most famous music producers in the world, going on to provide the backbone for hits from some of the biggest artists of all time, including Britney Spears, Jay Z, Snoop Dogg, Madonna, The Hives, Gwen Stefani, Maroon 5, Shakira, Jennifer Lopez, Mika, and many others. "I have to produce people”, he says. “I have to work with people. It's my only means of learning, my only means of colliding with foreign
energy. It would be like asking Captain Kirk to just stay on Earth." Last year, in addition to his Neptunes work, Williams began to write and produce on his own. Since then, he has, among other things, produced tracks for blockbuster albums by Miley Cyrus and Jay-Z, cranked out the soundtrack for a hit movie (which included the juggernaut hit ‘Happy’). At one point in June, Williams had the rare distinction of occupying both the No. 1 and No. 2 slots on Billboard's Hot 100 at the same time with Robin Thicke's ‘Blurred Lines’, which he produced and co-wrote, and Daft Punk's ‘Get Lucky’, which he co-wrote. Being partly responsible for three of the biggest songs in recent history
has made his sound utterly ubiquitous. “You never know when a song is going to be huge”, he says. “The people make that decision. The only thing you can do is be loyal to your creativity and try to do something new and fresh, and leave it at that. What makes a song huge is people buying records, streaming it online, voting for it, and those are things that are out of my control. Those are the factors that make a song a hit; it's never been me. The people decide. What I do is such a small part.” While his rapping and record-making credentials are not in any doubt, he doesn’t often display the same level of empty braggadocio as some of his peers, focussing instead on
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Since then, he has produced tracks for blockbuster albums by Miley Cyrus and Jay-Z, cranked out the soundtrack for a hit movie (which included the hit ‘Happy’)
sharing his success. Achieving that level of peace and satisfaction took a lot of time and hard work. “I felt like I had amassed this big body of work, most of which was just about selfaggrandizement, and I wasn't proud of it”, he says. “So I couldn't be proud of the money that I had; I couldn't be proud of all the stuff that I had. I was thankful, but what did it mean? What did I do? I didn’t want to throw my success into some kid's face. Instead of saying, ‘Look at all the fish I have, and look how much we're going to eat’, it should've been—at least a part of it—teaching them how to fish.” As part of his bid to “teach kids to fish”, he runs a charity called From One Hand To
Another, a foundation that assists at risk youth between the ages of 7 and 20 in communities throughout the country. “The simplest way to say it is that I think we're all dealt these cards in life, but the cards in and of themselves don't read one way or the other. It's up to you to home in on and cultivate whatever you've got in your hand. Most of the time, I see what I see, I search my feelings, and then I make my decisions based on my gut – and I don't always make the right ones.” From One Hand To Another forms part of i am OTHER, his media and philanthropic company. Included at the moment are fashion labels Billionaire Boys Club and Ice Cream, the cloud-based music-creation platform UJAM, a YouTube channel (also called i am OTHER), and From One Hand to Another, a not-for-profit that empowers kids in underserved communities. His partnerships include the enviro-friendly textile firm Bionic Yarn and Collaborative Fund, financier of outside-the-box creative endeavours such as Kickstarter. More tangentially, he's flexing his tastemaker muscle as a guest curator on eBay. "Your own offering to the world should be a signature of who you are and what you're up to. The difference is, now I realise there's something so much bigger than me. My music is so much bigger than me, and what I am.”
There is no better proof of this than the global impact of his song ‘Happy’. Originally composed for inclusion on the Despicable Me 2 soundtrack, it has also served as the lead single on his second album, Girl. It’s since gone on to become one of the most successful singles in the world, peaking at number one in 24 countries. To coincide with the single release, the website 24hoursofhappy. com was launched featuring a visual presentation of "Happy" advertised as being "the world's first 24 hour music video". The video consists of the four-minute song repeated with various people dancing around Los Angeles and miming along. ‘My best songs come from two different ways,’ he says. ‘Either when I have a really good gut feeling about something, it's written in the shower or on a plane.” We assume that he must have had a really good shower when he came up with ‘Happy’. This video spawned many cover videos on YouTube, in which people from different cities throughout the world dance to the song, including war-torn countries such as Iran (where the fans who created the tribute were arrested). Those videos are usually called ‘Pharrell Williams – Happy – We Are From (name of the city)’. More than 1500 such videos have been created to date. When speaking about this phenomenon in an interview with Oprah, Williams broke into
tears when shown the global impact of the song. "I just appreciate the fact that people have believed in me for so long that I could make it to this point to feel something like that", he told her after seeing the world’s reaction to his song. So it appears that the man with the Midas touch is human after all and is given to the same kind of emotions as the rest of the world. As a creative person with stakes in so many endeavours, how does he stay confident and shake off the demons of self-doubt? “Fear is not a good thing, so I try not to experience it”, he says. “It's like a strait-jacket on your creativity. I always think that I would probably be better off using the energy I'd put into being fearful to think of something incredible to create.”
PHARRELL WILLIAMS AT A GLANCE Born 5 April 1973 in Virginia, USA Son of a teacher, Carolyn, and Pharaoh Williams, a handyman Met future collaborator Chad Hugo in a band camp Formed The Neptunes with Hugo in high school with friends Shay Haley and Mike Etheridge Discovered by Teddy Riley during a school talent show After graduation, they were signed to Riley’s label, kickstart ing their recording career Williams and Hugo reunited as a recording duo in 1994 under their old name, The Neptunes Provided the sonic backbone for many number one hits by artists including Britney Spears, Jay Z, Snoop Dogg, Ma donna, The Hives, Gwen Stefani, and more Started writing and recording his own music in 2013 His ubiquitous hit, ‘Happy’, was featured prominently in Despicable Me 2, which propelled him to superstardom ‘Happy’ has since gone on to become one of the most suc cessful singles in the world, peaking at number one in 24 countries The ‘Happy’ music video spawned many cover videos on YouTube, in which people from different cities throughout the world dance to the song Is overwhelmed at the reach the song has achieved Runs a charity called From One Hand To Another, which focuses on helping at risk youth
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JOLLY GOOD SPORT
From early on in his career, Raman Raheja knew that he wanted to entertain people, and one of the most popular ways of doing this is through sport. Kabaddi is an ancient Indian contact sport, and Raheja is making it his mission to bring it to the west via the World Kabaddi League.
D
espite Raman Raheja’s keen interest in the sporting world, it’s not actually what he set out to do after graduating from college. “I qualified as a fashion designer, and that was my first job, and I worked in a fashion garments manufacturing unit”, he recalls. The leap from fashion design to sport promotion seems like a pretty big one, and the journey was interesting. “During the latter part of my fashion studies, we used to do our graduation shows, which were like fashion shows, so I got involved in the production part of that. It was hard work, but that was something that interested me more than being on the other side of the stage. I’ve always loved to be in the back, behind the scenes during that time, so that was the turning point for me. I really like it, and that’s where my skills lie. So I got into the production and the events management part of it from that, and that was followed by the entertainment industry, so here I am.” When we think about the entertainment industry, the mind tends to head towards the arts – movies, theatre, television, and books. Sport is, while very entertaining to watch, an industry all on its own. Lots of
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I've always loved to be in the back, behind the scenes during that time, so that was the turning point for me. I really like it, and that’s where my skills lie
governments place far more importance of sports than on the arts, and this shows in the budgets allocated to both departments. But, like the actors and writers who entertain us through the arts, athletes entertain us with their particular set of skills, so the transition from entertainment in the form of shows to entertainment in the form of sport felt like a natural one for Raman. “If it’s a form of an entertainment, whether its live entertainment or whatever, that’s what my profession has been: live entertainment. People will want to just watch sport just for the entertainment of it, so that’s where I think it is fitting together. And in India, or for that matter anywhere in the world, it’s the sport that’s the entertainment aspect of it.” The world is saturated with various types of sports – some, like football and rugby, glamorous and lucrative, others less well known. It is Raman Raheja’s dream to take one of those lesser known sports and bring it to the forefront of sporting entertainment. “Kabaddi is actually a 4,000 year old sport. The first reference of Kabaddi happened during the time of our Indian mythology of the great battle of Mahabharata when the son of Arjuna, Abhimanyu, got trapped in the Chakravyuh, which was set up by his enemies. That’s the first reference. Only recently we have
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been trying to make an effort to package it well for the current audience.” Not only is Kabaddi a sport rich in Indian history, it has made its way across the oceans and landed on the shores of countries such as the United Kingdom, Canada, the U.S., Australia, and South Africa. There are leagues all over the world and it is continuing to grow in popularity. Up until quite recently, Kabaddi has been popular almost exclusively in Indian expat communities, but exposure of the sport, thanks in large part to its popularisation as a form of training in the British Army (even Prince William played recently), this is rapidly changing. “Since it’s an Indian sport that has been played for so many years, the British Army adopted it during the time when the British came to rule India. They kind of adopted it for the excitement that it brings, and for the one-on-one combat.” It’s been around for thousands of years and is increasing in popularity, but what is it actually? Kabaddi is a full contact team sport
originating in India, in which two teams take turns to send a "raider" to the other's territory, or half, and tag any one of the four "stoppers" of the opposing team, and return "home" within a 30 second time frame to win the raid, failing which the stoppers win the raid. The objective is to win as many points as possible either through raiders or through stoppers. This all sounds like fun, but getting people to tune into a game of Kabaddi on television or to attend a live match will be a challenge with the world being so sport-saturated already. “The first thing that we’re
Kabaddi is a full contact team sport originating in India, in which two teams take turns to send a "raider" to the other's territory
COVER STORY
going to do is packaging it for our younger audience”, explains Raheja. “It has been a male dominated sport until now. Now we want to bring in the element of families coming together and watching it. So far, we have brought in the entertainment aspect with a touch of glamour. That will get me the additional attention amongst the non-Kabaddi followers, so that’s how we’re going to do the packaging. That’s the first element. We want people to watch it in their living rooms instead of being limited to a live performance in a stadium. Now we’re packaging it well, adding production values and being on the best of the television channels. These are the things that we’ve got to do to make it popular.” Turning something from a sport of the people into something glamorous is no mean feat, but Raheja has a plan. “World Kabaddi League has a very interesting mix of glamour from Bollywood and some serious businesses based both outside and inside of India that are the owners of these Kabaddi teams, so you would have the likes of a top Bollywood stars and celebrities from the Indian music scene, and they’re bringing the glamour portion of Bollywood to Kabaddi. And then we have some serious
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COVER STORY THE BEST YOU businesses based in India and also the Indian families based and settled outside in Europe and in America and in Canada also investing into the privately owned teams.” It certainly seems that Raman Raheja and his team are well on their way to creating a legacy to be proud of. There are naysayers out there, who pontificate about sports just being a game, and nothing to get worked up about, but the tradition of two nations going to ‘war’ without all the bloodshed is a great way to build a country’s confidence, helping the economy and bringing residents together. One example of this is the 2010 FIFA World Cup in South Africa. In a country known for violence, racism, and political corruption, for the duration of the World Cup, hardly any violent crimes were reported. For that month, people saw past colour and enjoyed the tournament with their fellow South Africans, and if they could do it for a month, there is a possibility
of doing it for longer. Sport for entertainment’s sake can do a world of good, so Raman Raheja’s heart is definitely in the right place. “I would want my legacy to be that I have brought an ancient Indian sport to the rest of the world and made it more popular.” b
RAMAN RAHEJA AT A GLANCE Forty-one years old Lives in Delhi, where he grew up Very close with his family (both his parent live with him) Was a good and disciplined child and enjoyed school Counts his school years as some of the best times of his life Studied fashion design and started working for a clothing manufacturer Started working on the production side of fashion shows and found he enjoyed being behind the scenes Made the transition from fashion entertainment to sports entertainment Produced the opening and closing ceremonies for the 19th Commonwealth Games in Delhi Produced two Kabaddi World Cups for the Government of Punjab On a mission to bring the ancient Indian sport of Kabaddi to the western world Appointed as the CEO of the World Kabaddi League Will run this league for six months straight. Much like Formula 1, all 10 franchises will play each other on the same day
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THE BEST YOU
FEATURE
I would want my legacy to be that I have brought an ancient Indian sport to the rest of the world and made it more popular
WORLD KABADDI LEAGUE AT A GLANCE Eight international teams Five countries – England, Italy, Canada, USA, UAE and India A touring sports property (loosely based on F1) 14 international venues 94 Matches (90 league matches and four playoffs) Double Round Robin format (each team plays the other twice) Five Month long Calendar Inaugural match on 9 August Finals in December Every team to play on every weekend 250 Top International Kabaddi Players World Class Match officials – experience of four World Cups Rs. 3.5 Crore Prize Money Rs. 15 Crore Player’s Salary High quality HD prime time TV product Over 100 Million existing Kabaddi Fans Shri. Pargat Singh, sports administrator and Ex Olympian, commissioner of the League 9 and 10 August at O2 Arena, London 16 and 17 August at Birmingham LG Arena, Birmingham
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An investment in knowledge pays the best interest.� – Benjamin Franklin
Great reading, viewing and listening to empower, entertain, enrich, delight and enhance. The Best You rounds up classics and new books and media products that will make a positive difference in your life.
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DISCOVER NLP BY THE BEST YOU
The Discover NLP web series uncovers the worldwide sensation that has given so many people the keys to success, health, and happiness in business and in life. This series offers you pointers, tips, and techniques that will help you get so much more out of life. NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) is the study of excellence and how to produce the specific results you desire in your life on a consistent basis. Sign up to receive a series of reports, exercises, and articles that will help you understand how NLP can help you. Here’s a sneak preview of what to expect: l Get an edge over your competition in business and safely increase your profits l Get what you want by effectively managing your internal mindset and influencing others to happily work with you to achieve your dreams l Learn how to motivate yourself and others with ease l Think better, think more clearly, and make better decisions
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It does what is says on the tin.” – Laura Campbell
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LIFE CHANGING QUOTES BY BARRY PHILLIPS
Change mainly comes from one of two sources. First, we may be driven to change out of desperation. The second source that drives us to make changes in our lives is inspiration. Barry Phillips hopes that is where you find yourself now - about to become sufficiently inspired to make major changes in your life. For over two decades, Barry has worked in the personal-development arena, reviewing hundreds of books per year, and he is still astounded by the remarkable power of well-spoken words. His own life has been completely transformed because of many of these ‘Life Changing Quotes’. To him, the greatest contribution we can make to the life of another is to enable them to feel new hope, sense new emotions, and see new possibilities. Through this collection of inspiring and encouraging words, he trusts this will be true for you.
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It is nice to just pick up this book, open onto a random page, and find a day’s inspiration to ponder in a few words.” – Mark Palmer
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PLACES AND SPACES I’VE BEEN BY PHARRELL WILLIAMS AND JAY-Z
Redefining cool for a new generation, Pharrell Williams is a creative force, using music, fashion, and design to express his distinctive style. Originating at the crossroads of art, design, popular culture, and street savvy, Pharrell Williams’s output is unique. By playing off and combining such a wide range of disciplines, Pharrell has redefined the role of the contemporary recording artist, blazing a trail for other musicians and prominent cultural figures. Illustrated with lavish photography, this book explores Pharrell’s musical career in depth, charting his many projects from his production team The Neptunes, to the band N.E.R.D., and his collaborations with friends Kanye West, Jay-Z, Snoop Dogg, and other hip-hop royalty. This unprecedented volume documents Pharrell’s prolific body of work and his contribution to contemporary culture. This book was published with six different coloured covers. Customers will be shipped any of the six different colours at random.
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I recommend it to anyone who has a passion about creativity and a desire to work in the industry.” – Iain Gill
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PUTTING CHILDREN FIRST BY KAREN AND NICK WOODALL
Children living with separated parents fare best when their relationships with both parents continue to be close. Putting Children First helps mothers and fathers unlock and resolve the conflicts around contact with children that can arise during and after separation. Using strategies such as parenting plans, scripted phone calls, and parenting meetings, the book enables parents to communicate effectively on all the most important things in their children’s lives and make relaxed arrangements for the continued involvement of both parents in their children’s dayto-day lives. In this practical and reassuring guide, Karen and Nick Woodall draw on years of experience of helping separated parents resolve conflict. They provide strategies and tools to help you communicate with your ex-partner about every aspect of your children’s lives. Packed with case studies, Putting Children First illustrates how separations affect families in different ways and shows you that, whatever you are going through, you are not alone.
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If you are in this situation, it is great to read this book and know that a happy medium can be reached.” – From Bump to Grump
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HOW TO BE A MONEY MAGNET BY DR ROHAN WEERASINGHE
Money is one of those things that is both ubiquitous and elusive at the same time. It seems to be everywhere, but it’s just so hard to get your hands on, and even harder to keep it from slipping through your fingers. Dr. Rohan Weerasinghe has a unique understanding of finances, and with this audio programme, he can teach you how to: l Develop a “money mindset” l Re-engineer your life and your mindset l Build a strong credit history l Create a financial system l Raise money This exclusive programme can help you learn different strategies and help you change your life for success now! Learn the systems and strategies that Dr. Ro uses every day in both his personal life and his business. Take your financial status up a notch to the next level of understanding and success!
“
Covers all the practicalities around raising money and cleaning up your credit history. Very eye opening.” – Lucas Cielmarcheur
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LIVE LOVE LEGACY THE BEST
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What do you want to be remembered for? What are your relationships like with those around you? How does life treat you - and how do you treat your life? There is so much good in you. Enrich your life with the passion you feel and the connections you make.
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BASIC FIRST AID
Emma Hammett from First Aid for Life gives us guidance on what to do in an emergency
CHILDREN OF DIVORCE
Janet Murray, our resident divorce expert, gives parents tips on how to make their separation easier on the kids
WHAT DOES IT TAKE‌
...to be a fashion designer? We chat with Emily Tonkin, Creative Director at 30:fifteen
LIVE LOVE LEGACY EMMA HAMMETT
BASIC FIRST AID Though choking and burns are some of the most frequent first aid emergencies, many people are confused as to the best way to help. Emma Hammett from First Aid for Life has provided a step-by-step guide and video to equip you with the skills and knowledge you’ll need to assist.
CHOKING
C
hoking is incredibly common and extremely frightening; fortunately, it’s rarely fatal. Choking occurs when an object gets stuck at the back of the throat, blocking or partially obstructing the airway, meaning the casualty is unable to breathe. Since people who are choking often panic, which rarely improves the situation, it is crucial to act swiftly and competently. Stay calm and encourage the person who is choking to cough and clear the blockage on their own. If they are unable to cough: Bend them forward, supporting their chest with one hand ,and use the flat of your other hand to hit them firmly between the shoulder blades. Check to see if the blockage has cleared before giving another blow. If the blockage hasn’t
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cleared after five blows, the next stage is to try abdominal thrusts/the Heimlich manoeuvre. If the back blows don’t work, get an ambulance on the way To perform an abdominal thrust: Stand behind them and place one hand in a fist between their tummy button and rib cage. Use the other hand to pull up and under in a ‘J’ shaped motion in order to dislodge the obstruction. Do up to five abdominal thrusts, checking each time to see if the obstruction has cleared. Anyone who has received abdominal thrusts should be seen by a doctor. Never attempt an abdominal thrust on a baby – if you encounter a choking infant, the best manoeuvre to apply is a chest thrust using two fingers. If the person is still choking, call 999 (or 112) and alternate five back blows and five abdominal thrusts until emergency help arrives. If they become unconscious, start CPR.
EMMA HAMMETT
BURNS
The pain and damage caused by burns can be devastating. Knowing what to do immediately can make a massive difference in reducing the amount of pain and scarring experienced and may avoid them having any tissue damage at all.
NB: IMMEDIATELY PLACE THE AFFECTED AREA OF ANY BURN UNDER COOL RUNNING WATER. Immediately, but extremely carefully, remove loose clothing covering the burn. DO NOT REMOVE ANY CLOTHES STUCK TO THE SKIN. Put the affected area under cool running water for at least 10 minutes. Remember you are cooling the burn and not the person. Keep the casualty warm and dry and look out for signs of shock. Phone an ambulance, particularly if a large area is affected or if the skin is broken or blistered. Keep the affected area under cool running water while you are waiting for the ambulance. A burn is measured using the size of your hand – your palm is roughly equivalent to 1% of an adult body. Therefore, a burn measuring just the size of a 50 pence coin can be very serious for a baby or small child.
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SPECIAL CASES: If the burn is caused by a chemical, run under cool running water for at least 20 minutes. Read advice on the packaging and see if there are any specific instructions.
SUNBURN: Cool the area under a shower for at least 10 minutes or apply repeated cool wet towels for 15 minutes. When completely cooled, apply neat Aloe Vera gel to the affected area, this will soothe, reduce swelling, and promote healing. Give the sunburn victim plenty to drink and, if the burn is severe, seek medical advice. Burns to the; hands, face, feet, genitals, airways, or a burn that extends all the way around a limb, are particularly serious. Keep the burnt area under cool running water until the paramedic arrives.
It is strongly advised that you attend a Practical First Aid course to understand what to do in a medical emergency. First Aid for Life provides this information for guidance; it is not in any way a substitute for medical advice. First Aid for Life is not responsible or liable for any diagnoses made, or actions taken based on this information.
First Aid for Life is an award winning First Aid training business that is HSE and Ofqual Approved through Qualsafe Awards. Our trainers are medical and emergency services professionals, and our training is tailored to your needs. For more information, contact Emma Hammett on 0208 675 4036 or visit www. firstaidforlife.org.uk
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LIVE LOVE LEGACY JANET MURRAY
CHILDREN OF DIVORCE Sometimes relationships end – that is unavoidable. Divorce is a terrible thing to go through for both members of a romantic couple, but the break-up gets so much more complicated when children are involved. JANET MURRAY offers some sage advice on how to put them at ease.
P
erhaps one of the biggest reasons my clients give me for staying in an unhappy relationship is the fear of what a separation will do to their kids. So many of my clients watched their own parents separate as children and swore that they would never do that to their own kids. Many of them are absolutely heartbroken to discover that they can’t keep that promise. The uncomfortable truth that has to be faced is that young children, though they may reassure their parents to the contrary, prefer their parents
to stay together. Until your children are grown up and are able to see you as people as well as parents, they’re always going to want you to either stay together or get back together. I’m not trying to guilt trip you into staying together for the sake of your children’s happiness; I’m just being honest about what a big deal this is for your kids. Chances are, you know deep down how desperately your children want for you to stay with your spouse, which is what makes facing it so hard. This may be why you sometimes bury your head in the sand about it. The good news is that there
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Until your children are grown up as well as parents, they’re always going to want you to either stay together or get back together
is a lot you can do to make the separation process easier on your children. Even if your own parents didn’t handle it perfectly (who does?), it doesn’t mean it can’t be done. However, for now, I just wanted to share something positive with you: The resilience and coping skills you teach your children during this time of transition will benefit them not just now, but for the rest of their lives. You don’t need to be a therapist to help your children with stress. Perhaps the most important skill you can teach them during this time is that stress is something that can be managed. Imagine how
JANET MURRAY different your life would have been had you learned stress management techniques as a child.
SOME STRESS-BUSTING TECHNIQUES FOR CHILDREN: l Teach your children how to name their feelings and to indicate where in their body they feel them. Then have them imagine inhaling positive thoughts into those feelings/ places and exhaling difficult or negative feelings. l Consider making stress busting fun – perhaps by going to a children’s yoga class together. l Suggest to them that stress is just stuck energy and that going for a run, talking it out, writing it out, having a cry, or getting a hug can be enough to unstick it. l Allow them to talk about their fears – don’t make any subject off limits – never tell them that their fears are silly. l Teach them about the power of their emotions and why every emotion is important, even anger or sadness. Don’t make any emotion bad. l Teach them the difference between fantasy and reality. It is important that children are frequently reminded that the separation is in no way their fault. l Encourage them to use their creativity to express how they feel about the impending separation – often children can paint, draw or use puppets to express their anxieties with a clarity that is breathtaking, even if they don’t have the language to talk about it yet. l Show them how to write down what they are worried about, and encourage them to think through several different ways that they might deal with those worries. Nurturing their problem-solving abilities leads
FAR TOP Allow children to work their feelings out in arts and crafts ABOVE Being around fighting parents can be more damaging to a child than divorce
ABOVE Going through the legality can be exhausting for the whole family
to resilience and confidence as they learn to deal with life’s problems. It also can help them deal with the feelings of powerlessness that can really sap their joie-de-vivre. You are their best stressmanagement role model. Show them that you use these techniques – breath observance, going for a walk, yoga or a workout, journaling, writing letters that you don’t post, talking to other adults about your difficult feelings, nurturing yourself with good food and plenty of rest, taking time out, recognising when you’re too strung out to make a good decision about anything. If you’re just sitting there with a bottle of wine, or sitting in front of the TV comfort eating, what are you teaching them? Your children may not know the word ‘stressed’, but they will be able to see that you’re having a tough time. This may
LIVE LOVE LEGACY mean that they will therefore try to protect you from their difficult feelings. If they seem to be coping suspiciously well, it might be worth asking another trusted adult or family member to talk to them and see if they can give them some support. Alternatively, they may become extra difficult and demanding, and you may feel like you’re under attack from every direction. Remember to make sure that you are getting the support you need from yourself and from others so that you don’t lose it with your children. They want to be sure that you’re still their rock and so may bring out the heavy artillery to check that. Be wprepared. Your separation can seem like the end of the world for your children. However, in helping them to survive this and giving them tools to manage stress and solve their problems, you will help to build their confidence that you are someone they can continue to trust and respect. Right now, I get that that this may not feel like much of a silver lining, but these are skills and qualities that they will rely on for a lifetime. b
Order Janet Murray’s eBook, Essential Divorce Wisdom.
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LIVE LOVE LEGACY THE BEST YOU
TO BE A
a fashion designer? Part of being the best you can be is focusing on what it takes to get there. We’re continuing the “What does it take…?” column, which looks at this aspect of being the best. This month, we’re chatting with young fashion designer Emily Tonkin.
HOW DO YOU BECOME A FASHION DESIGNER? I don’t think there is any set way to become a fashion designer. There are obviously tools you need to be successful, which you can gain from studying at one of the great design schools around the world. Despite the obvious skills you need (like pattern making, fabric knowledge, sourcing, etc.), being able to take criticism, work hard, use your initiative, take instruction and learn from your coworkers will give you a strong foundation to get you moving up the industry ladder. Also, say yes to everything, smile, and be genuine.
WHAT IS THE BEST THING ABOUT BEING A FASHION DESIGNER? Watching the whole process of a product. Knowing that it started with just an idea/sketch, and then seeing someone wearing it (knowing they chose your product over any other). It’s a pretty awesome feeling, and I can’t see it ever getting old.
AND THE WORST? I absolutely LOVE my job, I feel so grateful to be in the position I am in, there’s nothing I ever really complain about. But I guess if I have to choose something, it would be when work interferes with my personal life. Deadlines are deadlines in this industry, so it’s inevitable I’ll work longer hours to get things done the way I want them to be, which can play havoc with a single girl’s dating plans.
IT SEEMS LIKE A VERY GLAMOROUS INDUSTRY. WHAT’S YOUR AVERAGE DAY LIKE? That always makes me laugh when people say that to me. I used to think that too, but I don’t feel very glamorous day to day. What’s
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great is, I don’t really have an ‘average’ day, but they do always start with coffee. Ha! Seriously it all depends on where we are with a season or in production, then my day will plan out accordingly: Reviewing sales, contacting suppliers and clients, researching, sourcing, managing logistics, signing off artwork for the website.
HOW DOES THAT COMPARE TO A DAY ON A SHOW LIKE PROJECT RUNWAY? Oh, I wish I had time to watch that show! For someone who is known for watching a lot of reality shows in her spare time, I have embarrassingly never seen Project Runway, so I don’t know. My days are probably way less entertaining – plus I don’t get to have Tim Gunn or Heidi Klum walk into my studio to watch me work, so I’d take a guess and say not so similar.
IF YOU COULD WORK FOR ANY FASHION HOUSE IN THE WORLD, WHOM WOULD YOU WORK FOR, AND WHY? Donna Karan. I have been a fan of her and her work since I can remember. Everything she does is a matter of heart, body and soul, and every cell in my body resonates with that. I love the concept of Donna Karen, designing around the Seven Easy Pieces, and rolling with the pace of New York. It’s not about the clothes; it’s about the lifestyle, and how they can dress accordingly.
WHY DO YOU THINK WOMEN’S FASHION IS SO DOMINATED BY MALE DESIGNERS? I wish I had a good answer for this question, but I don’t really know, it’s not something I spend a lot of my time thinking about. However, I don’t believe it has anything to do with men being more creative or having a better understanding of what a woman wants than women
THE BEST YOU
LIVE LOVE LEGACY
do. Instead, sadly, I think it may have something to do with men vs. women agenda. Even though women have come so far over the years, men still dominate in the workplace, and I guess women’s fashion is no exception.
WHICH LIVING PERSON DO YOU MOST ADMIRE AND WHY? This is embarrassing, but my dad. I am 100 per cent his biggest fan! Yes, he has a lot of flaws, but I know no one else who has a heart like his. He is able to find a positive in everything and has a great sense of humor, no matter what the situation. He also has shown me that if you work hard, stay true to yourself, and believe in your dreams, things will happen. He is living proof of it, and I feel so incredibly blessed to have a dad like him in my life.
WHAT’S YOUR PROUDEST MOMENT BEEN? Graduating from The Fashion Institute of Design and Merchandising in Los Angeles in 2010. Before I attended the school, I had completely lost who I was as a person, and the school brought me back to life. It brought out talents I didn’t think I possessed and prepared me for the fashion industry. I am so grateful to have been able to go to that school, learn from some of the best industry professionals, and meet lifelong friends. I would not be where I am today without the education from FIDM.
WHAT DID YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU WERE LITTLE? A singer, dancer, and actress. It was what I did my entire childhood, then at a professional level until I was 20 years old. I thought that was what I was going to continue doing the rest of my life.
WHEN LAST DID YOU SEE THE SUNRISE? I am an early riser generally, so in the winter I see it most days, but the last time I saw the sunrise was on the 4 July 2014. I was flying to NYC and had to leave for the airport at 5am so I saw it rise on the drive to Heathrow.
HOW DO YOU RELAX? Yoga and meditation. What do you want to be remembered for? If I have any input in helping people live out their dreams, trust their instincts, and work towards any form of change, whether it be personal or global, I would be elated. However, I’ll more than likely be remembered for my loud laugh and my ability to relate any situation to an episode of Friends or Sex and the City.
WHICH GARMENT DO YOU MOST WISH THAT YOU CAME UP WITH? Great question! I mean there are the obvious shape creations by Christian Dior, Chanel and Yves Saint Laurent, but I guess I’d choose a garment that really helped build a brand, giving them the publicity that enabled them to go forward with other lines to make them the designer/brand a success. For example, Diane Von Furstenberg’s wrap dress or Pamela Skaist-Levy and Gela Nash-Taylor’s Juicy sweatpants.
b
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LIVE LOVE LEGACY ONE PLUS ONE
paulmckennadubai.com http://paulmckennadubai.com/
THE BEST YOU
FEEL & LOOK GOOD
THE BEST
YOU
Feeling good about yourself makes the joy shine from your eyes and your skin. It makes others respond to you in new ways and it gives you a whole new outlook on life. Looking good draws others to you and enhances your life in ways you haven’t yet imagined. It’s great to find new ways to feel and look good now!
Life Without Limits
TM
AFTERNOON DELIGHT
Nutritional expert Naomi Beinart explains the phenomenon of the 4pm sugar craving
THE TRUTH BEHIND FIVE-A-DAY
Zoë Harcombe debunks the age-old myth of five-a-day as a marketing scheme
FEEL & LOOK GOOD
SUSAN HEPBURN
F*** DIETS Forget the ‘D’ word, says Susan Hepburn. They don’t work, and yo-yo dieting is harmful to the body: it puts a strain on the heart and disrupts the metabolism, which actually makes it harder to lose weight.
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ouldn’t it be great to have no more guilty feelings about the food you eat? No more drama surrounding what and how much you eat? What if you could actually enjoy your food? All you have to do is eat slowly and mindfully. Mindfulness is gathering force as a highly popular and effective psychological tool, both in mainstream culture and psychological practice as well. Visualisation is a powerful mind tool that can help you achieve your target size. The way it works is simple: the more you mentally rehearse a thought, the stronger the neural pathways are and the more success you will have making what you imagine a reality. Mindful eating is a joyful and peaceful experience; it is all about enjoying your food while, at the same time, being aware of what we are putting into our bodies. More people than ever are receptive to change these days. The ‘I can change myself’ mindset is not only a powerful tool – it is a popular one as well. Through a combination of mindfulness and hypnosis, I begin an internal revolution, one that helps recapture self-esteem by making one at first aware of and then in control of what he or she consumes, allowing them to eat mindfully and healthily. This is the holistic approach that diets lack. Without the self-awareness and empowerment that this approach encourages, results will be, at best, temporary. I emphasise building a lasting, healthy, and sustainable relationship both with food and the stresses that so often contribute
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SUSAN HEPBURN to the cycles of overeating and yo-yo dieting. Dieting is usually little more than a quick fix that relies on fear and shame and uses stopgap measures like deprivation and denial. It is frenetic; mindful eating is calm. There is increasing evidence that both men and women are mindfully paying far more attention to their ‘Body Mastery’. The twenty-first century is positively obsessed with fitness and health—this is, of course, coupled with a body-image preoccupation that borders on the pathological. There are, though, untold benefits that come in the wake of a healthy and mindful approach to health and fitness. Research has shown that those who exercise regularly and eat healthily live longer and more fulfilling live and they have higher levels of body satisfaction. Exercise and healthy, mindful eating will do more than help you avoid health complications. They are the keys to living a long and rich life. Being active increases your lifespan and reduces the chance of heart attacks and strokes. It also streamlines your body, improves your posture, and reduces feeling of hunger, lethargy, and even depression. While exercise has immediate positive effects, there
is a plateau that many reach quite early. Therefore, it is essential to have the mindset that you are enjoying the journey towards fitness and health. The results you want may be slow in coming, but, like so much in life, it is the journey, not the destination, that you’ll want to find pleasure in. Achieving your desired size is best viewed as a by-product of the journey to a healthier and more mindful relationship with our bodies and our food. Take action. We all have to do lists; don’t let being fit and healthy be at the bottom of yours. Don’t say, ‘I will do it later’, because you won’t.
FEEL & LOOK GOOD
TOP TIPS
Being active increases your lifespan and reduces the chance of heart attacks and strokes. It also streamlines your body, improves your posture, and reduces feeling of hunger
l Eat mindfully – You’ll enjoy your food more, becoming aware of what you put into your body, and therefore making healthier choices. l Savour your food – Concentrate on what you are eating and never eat quickly. Gulping down your food means missing out on wonderful textures and flavours l Eat slowly and chew your food well – This will help you will eat less. Allow your body to tell you that it is full – we need to listen for this message. l Eat every three hours. When you eat, your blood sugar (glucose) rises. The higher and quicker it rises, the more insulin your pancreas has toproduce to keep up. The higher your blood sugar goes up, the lower it crashes down afterwards. This crash will also occur if you leave longer than three hours between eating. At the drop, your body will send you off for a quick fix, like a bar of chocolate or a cup of tea and biscuit, because it need to lift the blood sugar up again. l Eat mindfully and in moderation – These are the cornerstones of the proper approach to weight loss – certainly not deprivation and feast/famine behaviour. l Think small – We live in a super-size culture. Food is not onl readily available on every corner and almost 24/7, it is more often than not unhealthy and served in huge portions. Consider your portions and eat less. l Exercise daily – Exercise is an essential part of your daily life, not an optional extra. Adjust your mindset towards exercise. Treat it as fun, not a chore, and you may just become addicted to it. Forget the ‘no pain, no gain’ formula. It is ridiculous – pain usually means injury. l Eat regularly – Don’t skip breakfast; too many people mistakenly believe that doing so will help you to lose weight. The opposite is true. The undernourished body goes into starvation mode and stores fat. l Drink water – It is crucial to be mindful about drinking lots of water regularly throughout the day and evening. It helps to flush out toxins, avoid dehydration, and it is excellent for healthy, youthful looking skin, so that’s an incentive in itself.
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FEEL & LOOK GOOD
CHRISTINE MEERMAN COOPER
LIVE YOUR DREAMS Self-belief is an extraordinary thing. Christine Meerman-Cooper believes that, with the right motivation, attitude and support, anything is possible. Earlier this year she took on the hardest challenge of her life – a 12-day Arctic expedition into the Brooks Range, Alaska.
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s a child I dreamt of visiting Alaska one day. That dream came true in April 2014 when I headed out to the 19-millionacre Arctic National Wildlife Refuge on an Arctic expedition with pioneering musher Joe “Malamute Man” Henderson and his team of 22 Alaskan Malamutes. We journeyed 120 miles across the northern side of the Brooks Range over twelve days, mostly cross country skiing, in some of the most remote areas of the Arctic. I undertook this expedition as an extreme sponsored trek to raise funds and awareness for Malamute Matters, which helps rescue dogs, and Friends of OSCAR, which supports the families of
children diagnosed with brain and spinal tumours. Joe Henderson is something of a legend in the global mushing community, so when Joe posted a status inviting applications for a lucky few to join him on his 2014 expedition, I decided to take a chance and applied. As Trustee of Malamute Matters and an owner of two wonderful Alaskan Malamutes Matters, I wanted to join this expedition to experience firsthand a taste of the life that these dogs had originally been bred for and also to highlight the plight that Malamutes now face. A couple of months before I was due to set off for the Arctic, I became aware of a charity called Friends of OSCAR.
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CHRISTINE MEERMAN COOPER
THIS PICTURE Christine travelled for many miles with her beloved animals
Having never been athletic in any shape or form previously, I had to work extremely hard to train for the expedition My father, whose sense of adventure inspired my taking on this challenge, had suffered from a brain tumour at the age of twelve. Fortunately, he made a full recovery, but he was one of the lucky ones. I knew immediately that I had to do what I could to try and help Friends of OSCAR. Having never been athletic in any shape or form previously, I had to work extremely hard to train for the expedition, focusing on developing my strength and endurance. I knew it was imperative that I stop smoking, so I made a New Year’s resolution to switch to E-Lites electronic cigarettes and I contacted E-Lites to tell them I was using their products to help me prepare for my expedition. It was the best move I made: E-Lites became my main partners and sponsors in the expedition and helped make my dream come true as part of their Believe You Can
FEEL & LOOK GOOD
Each evening the focus was on relaxing and cooking dinner, which alternated between protein-heavy meals of fresh meat and vegetables or instant meals that had to be rehydrated with melted snow. I ate constantly (I must have consumed around 10,000 calories a day), yet I still lost weight. Our focus was survival: food and firewood were our main priorities. But we also had a lot of fun, toasting marshmallows and cooking popcorn on open campfires, practising shooting targets with the rifles we carried with us in case of close encounters with bears, fussing over the dogs, discussing the day’s experiences and swapping stories from back home. We only ever spotted a few ptarmigan, but we knew wolves were not far behind us for much of the journey. We never saw them; their tracks in the snow were all that alerted us to their presence. One night, I heard a wolf softly howl in the distance, and all the Malamutes answered the call, howling back in chorus. For an animal lover and nature enthusiast, and particularly a Malamute owner, this expedition truly was the experience of a lifetime. I shall carry with me always the memories of this magical trip. If this challenge has taught me anything it is to live life by the Malamute mantra: Never give up. I never gave up on my dream, and I will never give up trying to help those I care about.
campaign. I believed that I could do this, so they in turn believed in me and supported me. My mallies, Lila and Rumo, were my unflagging training companions. Together, we ran, jogged, hiked, and backpacked all over Scotland. I never took a single day off, and I never gave up, no matter how sore or how tired I was. I was no longer afraid of facing the Arctic. How much harder could it be than what I was putting myself through now? The expedition was physically and mentally demanding. Each morning, the frost, snow and ice would be inside my tent. Every day, we had to dismantle our tents and load the sleds before setting off cross country skiing across the frozen tundra for usually five or six hours until we reached a suitable spot to set up camp.
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THE BEST YOU
WEALTH & RICHES
THE BEST
YOU
Wealth [n] “happiness,” also “prosperity in abundance of possessions or riches” from Middle English “wele”, meaning “wellbeing”. Riches [n] “valued possessions, money, property." Make money and bring greater wealth to EVERY area of your life.
Life Without Limits
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THINGS ARE LOOKING UP Michael Jacobsen gives some facts and figures that show the economy is on the mend
SNAKES AND LADDERS T he earlier you can afford to get on the property ladder, the better. Vincent Wong from Wealth Dragons explains why it’s a wise investment
BE A MONEY MAGNET Dr. Rohan Weerasinghe gives us some advice about how to attract the right kind of wealth
WEALTH & RICHES MICHAEL JACOBSEN
THINGS ARE LOOKING UP
We may not have as much disposable income as we would like yet, but we have all heard reports about the economy improving. Serial entrepreneur and global SME Michael Jacobsen gives us some facts and figures that show the economy is on the mend.
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he last six years since the world changed (i.e. the Global Financial Crisis) has been a tumultuous one for the business world. It has been uncertain for the world’s largest companies, let alone the SMEs and start-ups that are without the financial cushioning of a large firm. We have seen companies big and small go to the wall and even household names such as Kodak have landed in bankruptcy – not to mention the collapsed banks! The unwritten law in all financial markets is every boom must bust and, likewise, every bust must once again boom. It is cyclical. We are now starting to see developed world economies improving; in particular, Britain is showing GDP growth and increasing exports. GDP increased 0.8% in the first quarter of 2014, but crucially this was up 3.1% year on year, demonstrating massive growth and making the UK one of the fastest growing western economies. The UK economy remains just 0.6% smaller than its peak in 2008, which isn’t at all bad given the tumultuous time it has been though in the interim. However, the question I ask myself is, did the world really ‘end’ during the GFC?
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MICHAEL JACOBSEN
REJOICE: THE END IS NIGH
“Optimism is a force multiplied.”
WEALTH & RICHES
Sports players recognise that the psychology of positivity in their performance can have significant aimpacts on the field
Colin Powell
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e have seen in the same period of time the rise in mega companies like Facebook. At the same time, Apple has become the most valuable company in the world. As Moody’s Corporation – the global credit rating agency – explains, the combined cash of Apple, Microsoft, Google, Verizon Communications, and Pfizer climbed to $404 billion at the end of last year. Closer to home have also seen a large growth in the UK tech scene with Tech City, now one of the world’s largest tech locales after Silicon Valley, with major companies such as Google and Facebook having a presence there alongside thousands of other start-ups. We have seen luminaries of the UK tech scene like Eric Van Der Kleis,
former CEO of Tech City, go onto other trailblazing activities. He now heads the internationally groundbreaking Level 39 – a Fintech and Future Cities incubator owned by Canary Wharf Corporation. According to Government statistics, micro and small businesses represent 95 per cent of all companies and employ more than seven million people in the UK. Research from Start Up Britain shows that 526,446 businesses were registered with Companies House in 2013. This beats by a sizeable margin the 484,224 businesses that were recorded in 2012 and the 440,600 that were recorded in 2011. According to Start Up Loans, 281,197 new firms in the UK have formed in 2014 so far, and we are only half way through the year. If this continues, 2014 will outstrip 2013. There are now 4.9m small businesses operating in the UK.
General Colin Powell once said: “Optimism is a force multiplied.” This is a military term and it indicates a major asset. The US military recognises that optimism can win wars; sports players recognise that the psychology of positivity in their performance can have significant aimpacts on the field. Our government as well recognises that optimism in the key economic indicator of Consumer Confidence, which is really just optimism or pessimism. It isn’t real. It’s people’s psychology. Now that the statistics are revealing that the economy is improving in the UK, lets couple that with some optimism and get our visions in place and start new businesses and grow existing ones to bolster our economy for the future. We can improve our own bottom lines and the business ecosystem as well. b
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WEALTH & RICHES
VINCENT WONG
SNAKES &LADDERS As the Bank of England raises interest rates by one quarter of a per cent (July 2014) some industry ‘experts’ claim this news will leave the first-time-buyer (FTB) market unscathed. The UK’s leading expert on lease options and co-founder of Wealth Dragons Vincent Wong considers the day-to-day reality for any FTB and also shares some top tips on how they can get themselves on the property ladder and avoid the snakes in the process. THIS PICTURE Getting your very own home is a great investment
they are a student, a bricklayer, or a trader in the financial markets, there is no viable reason why a FTB can’t pave the way towards a solid financial future. FTB’s may come up against negativity amongst friends or family. This is quite normal for any ‘propentrepreneur’ seeking to better their quality of life. So, ignore the naysayers; believe in yourself and consider any one of the following options:
BANK OF MUM AND DAD
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s with any interest rate hike, this will have an impact on your loans and savings accounts. It is the nature of economics. Saying otherwise is unfounded and short sighted. The very fact that the average UK house price is £186,512 (nationwide) might put off any hungry FTB who doesn’t have a deposit in hand. So how can FTB’s take their first step?
The options available to FTB’s are extremely favourable, provided they educate themselves regarding the market and open their mind to possibilities. Prior to engaging in any financial arrangement, it is important for anyone considering a loan to understand his or her credit score. This is easily obtainable via Experian or the like. Without a strong credit score, securing a loan may be a struggle if the FTB isn’t cash rich. Whether
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The options available to FTB’s are favourable, provided they educate themselves regarding the market
A growing percentage of parents are buying property for their children as a way of managing their longer-term financial assets. Such purchases can also reduce Inheritance Tax at the time of one or both parents’ deaths. Slightly morbid though it may seem, it’s actually a sensible strategy. Parents can either ‘gift’ the money to their offspring (understanding that IHT may be applicable if a parental death occurs within seven years from the time of giving) or offer the child the money to cover off a deposit (ditto IHT rulings depending on how the funds are obtained). Such financial agreements can help forge bonds between parent and child as both achieve peace
MICHAEL JACOBSEN
of mind and a home from the transaction.
THIS PICTURE Fixing up your own home can be exciting
HELP TO BUY GOVERNMENT MORTGAGE SCHEME FOR FTB’S The UK Government has developed a scheme to help FTB’s and those already living in a residential home with a deposit as low as 5 per cent. Two options are currently available: Mortgage Guarantee and Equity Loan. For FTB’s, this scheme is viable for properties worth up to £600,000 and for individuals who intend to live in the property (as their sole residence) and take out a repayment only mortgage. Only some lenders buy into this scheme, so FTB’s should check with a mortgage advisor. The latter will also be able to advise whether credit scoring is high enough.
CO-OPERATIVE Entrepreneurial FTB’s may consider clubbing together with friends to secure a deposit and co-purchase a property. There is nothing wrong with this idea in principle – far from it. However, do ensure that all parties agree to terms laid out in a written, legally binding agreement. This contract should also include a clause about exit strategy and what happens should one or more of the co-operative partners wish to sell their property share further down the line.
SHARED OWNERSHIP Shared ownership schemes are provided through local housing associations (LHA’s) whereby FTB’s or other hopeful property owners buy a share of their home, normally ranging between 25 and 75 per cent of the home’s value. The balance of the remaining share is paid as ‘rent’. A mortgage is required to support the paid-for aspect of the transaction, and this
WEALTH & RICHES
THIS PICTURE Imagine the thrill of being handed the keys to your home
opportunity is only available to those with income households of less than £60K per annum. Shared ownership properties are always Leasehold. It is essential for any FTB to understand industry jargon such as Leasehold, Freehold, credit scoring, equity, repayment mortgage versus interest only, etc.
LEASE OPTIONS (RENT TO BUY)
THIS PICTURE Finding a space for everything is part of the fun
Lease Options is a lesser-known investment strategy in the UK and is often discussed without all the facts and correct information being available to hand. Acquiring a Lease Option is a perfectly legal and viable way to take over someone else’s mortgage with the ‘option’ of buying the property for an agreed-upon price further down the line. In order for a Lease Option to go through successfully, though, it is important for the FTB to have a good credit score and engage the services of a specialist Lease Option lawyer. In summary, if a FTB wants to dip their toes into the world of property, no matter what their situation, there is always a solution (in the main). But creativity plays a part, as does education and good advice. In this way, FTB’s will dodge snakes along their journey and get on with the best part of the deal: the house warming party in their new home.
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WEALTH & RICHES DR ROHAN WEERASINGHE
HOW TO BE A MONEY MAGNET Having helped thousands of people on the path to Financial Freedom across nine different countries, Dr Rohan Weerasinghe believes that creating more money in your life starts with learning how to be a Money Magnet.
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DR ROHAN WEERASINGHE
WHAT IS A MONEY MAGNET?
The first major steps to being a money magnet involve being willing to model your approach on others who are THE KEY ELEMENTS OF BEING A MONEY already successful MAGNET money As a wealth mentor, I get the opportunity to explore in detail magnets. exactly what holds people back from being financially secure. The To help first major steps to being a money magnet involve being willing to model your approach on others who are already successful money you on the magnets. To help you on the way, here are four steps that will kickway, here start your journey towards becoming a money magnet: are four STEP 1: steps that Establish your current template (baseline) with money – in other will kickwords, how you and money show up together. Then establish new start your rules and beliefs focussed on you becoming a money magnet. journey STEP 2: Clarify your vision for future wealth that with integrity and towards purpose. Then establish the vehicles through which you wish to becoming attract more money into your life (e.g. business, investments, etc.) a money STEP 3: magnet Over the last decade, the term ‘money magnet’ has become widely used in the world of wealth and personal development. In simple terms, a money magnet is a person who, through their intention, passion, and aptitude for spotting opportunities, is able to monetise ideas, conversations, and relationships to the point where money literally comes rolling in. Does that sound impossible to you? If it does, you are likely lacking one or more of the characteristics of the true money magnet. The great thing is that, if you wish, you can make rapid changes to correct this. Being a money magnet is about being able to keep attracting money into your life for different purposes at different times – it’s about flow. Once you develop the skill of being a money magnet, it will appear to others watching from the outside that you are doing it effortlessly. In reality, it first takes work and discipline; in time, this becomes fun and, eventually, a way of life.
Clean up your existing credit file. Review your existing debt and types of borrowing and get on top of your money management systems. Give your money a purpose and direction, thus allowing it to flow to you.
STEP 4: Become a human tuning fork for opportunities and for people that have money and who want to share it with you. They are out there if you approach them the right way and with the right incentive.
WHAT IS YOUR CURRENT MONEY TEMPLATE? The first step (establishing your financial template) is often overlooked as people rush into different opportunities and throw money at different investments – often finding that these investments don't come to fruition. The reason is they have the wrong money template. As civil engineer I developed templates and blueprints drawings that went from the paper to becoming huge, multi-million
WEALTH & RICHES pound buildings. We all have templates for our health, our relationships and, without doubt, a template for dealing with money. This financial template defines every aspect of your money experience. Here are a few examples: Your choice of income generation (job, self- employed, entrepreneur) Your financial risk profile The type of investments that you do or do not make Your ability or inability to deal with debt How well you manage your finances The financial partners you attract into you life The starting point in Step 1 is to take a good hard look at your beliefs about money and where they came from. This means really digging deep to find out what has been holding you back. I have witnessed on some occasions how a single negative event has created a financial block in a person’s life. Imagine going through your life struggling financially and never being able to triple or quadruple your income because of one limiting belief. That would be a tragedy of Shakespearean proportions but one that so many people encounter. Take the time to clean up and recreate a new set of Money Magnet Beliefs. This alone will change your financial outlook and behaviours. Then you must work on reviewing your credit files and existing debt. This is essential. Awareness is the first step to change. Seeing things in black and white will help you get focussed. You must work diligently to clean this area of your life up. Money will flow when you release blockages. Finally, wake up each morning with a clear expectation that you can, that you deserve to, and that you will attract money in a healthy and ethical way. b
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WEALTH & RICHES
THE ROCKY ROAD TO SUCCESS
ANITA RODDICK
ELON MUSK
A FAIR TRADE
POST-MODERN GENIUS
If I can't do something for the public good, what the hell am I doing?”
When something is important enough, you do it even if the odds are not in your favour.”
Born in England during the height of World War II, Anita Roddick’s life seemed to channel the chaos surrounding that war, as she forged new activist fronts for twentieth-century environmental and social issues. On the way to becoming a success in many facets of business, Roddick was noted for kick-starting her own sustainability movement quite by accident. Roddick herself described how her founding of The Body Shop was a bit of a fluke, as her only intention was to keep she and her children afloat while her husband was out of the country for an extended period. In 1976, she hadn’t started out attempting to be environmentally sensitive with her business; she was merely trying to conserve enough bottles for her fledgling natural cosmetics products line. Her accidental method of conservation quickly began to catch on and take off. Only 15 years later, The Body Shop boasted 700 branches. Just after the turn of the 21st century, The Body Shop was serving over 77 million customers globally and was quickly bought out by L’Oreal. This move gave Roddick the time and resources she craved to devote to environmental and social issues, including aiding Greenpeace and helping underprivileged children throughout Europe. Anita Roddick passed away from illness in 2007, but her legacy of creating and selling cosmetics without the use of animal testing established an ethical standard in the beauty industry that still flourishes today.
It was perhaps the many cultures in which he was raised that drove Elon Musk to push civilisation forward as one people. He was born in South Africa to Canadian and British parents. Proving to have the true vigour of an entrepreneur from a young age, Musk moved to Canada when he was a teenager, intending ultimately to attend college in the U.S. He achieved his goal, receiving two degrees from the University of Pennsylvania. Musk’s first venture out of college proved to be a financial success, netting him millions when the company was ultimately sold. He then went on to found an email payment company known as X.com, but upon merging that brand with start-up PayPal, which provided a similar service, Musk removed any trace of X.com and, along with PayPal founder Peter Thiel, Musk began to grow the businessl by leaps and bounds. Musk has since risen to the heights of fame with the founding of leading edge companies such as SpaceX and Tesla Motors. The former company quickly locked up a billion dollar contract with NASA to fill the holes left by the space program’s grounding of its fleet. And Tesla Motors has brought class and design sophistication to electric and alternative-fuel-based vehicles. Elon Musk has proven to be one of the most brilliant modern minds working to make the world a better place, combining world-changing innovation with imaginative design prowess.
• “ANITA RODDICK WAS A CHAMPION FOR ETHICAL BUSINESS BEHAVIOUR, AND THANKFULLY FOR THE EARTH AND ANIMALS, THIS HAS BECOME SOMETHING OF A TREND. SHE LEFT AN AMAZING LEGACY WITHOUT EVEN SETTING OUT TO DO SO, AND IS AN INSPIRATION.”
• "ELON MUSK IS A PIONEER AND A MAN WHO NEVER BACKS DOWN FROM HIS DREAMS. NO MATTER HOW IMPROBABLE THE TASK, WHEN HE SETS HIS MIND ON SOMETHING, CHANCES ARE IT WILL GET DONE. WE SHOULD TAKE A PAGE FROM HIS BOOK.”
– BERNARDO MOYA
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– BERNARDO MOYA
THE ROCKY ROAD TO SUCCESS
WEALTH & RICHES
SLASH
SUZE ORMAN
CREATING ROCK HEAVEN ON EARTH
FINANCING THE FUTURE
I picked up a guitar for two seconds and haven't put it down since.” Before he became one of the most famous and well-respected guitarists in history, Slash was born as Saul Hudson. A quick study of his background and it becomes apparent how he chose music. His mother was a costume designer who dressed several famous musicians in the 1960s. His father, in kind, created artwork and album covers for performers including Neil Young. After passing on the trumpet as his instrument of choice, Slash found his way to the guitar and formed his first band in Los Angeles with childhood friend and future Guns N’ Roses band mate Steven Adler. Unable to find a singer that suited their tastes, Slash and Adler eventually joined another band known as Hollywood Rose. That group featured a particularly talented singer known as Axl Rose. Guns N’ Roses, or G N’ R as they became known, immediately cultivated a reputation for mayhem and a hard-partying lifestyle in the budding L.A. rock scene of the 1980s. Slash would go on to create one of the most distinctive guitar sounds ever for a rock band. The group went on to worldwide fame and has sold millions upon millions of albums. Despite battles with drugs and alcohol, Slash has prevailed through it all, placing a new priority on his health, and in recent years, he has created a solo sound all his own. In 2012, Slash was fittingly inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.
Many people are in the dark when it comes to money, and I'm going to turn on the lights.” At the age of 29, Suze Orman was already VP of investments at a top-tier financial services firm. She would ultimately make a long climb from her modest upbringing on the south side of Chicago in the 1950s. Working her way up from a post-college gig as a waitress, Orman trained and gained valuable experience with Merrill Lynch. She would go on to her VP position at Prudential Bache Securities before starting up her own financial services firm. Realising she had gained sought-after experience from her many strategic and successful career moves to that point, Orman began offering money and investment insight through writing. She wrote three books in three years to close out the 1990s. The Suze Orman Show was then developed and picked up by CNBC in 2002. Orman’s brash and flash style immediately clicked with a viewing audience. Following the budding success of her television series, Orman began appearing frequently on Oprah Winfrey’s eponymous television series. Before long, she was tasked with creating a series for the Oprah Winfrey Network and penning a column in O Magazine. Just as Suze Orman has preached on the positives of diversification in the financial world, so too has she lived by that theme when plotting out the course of her hugely successful climb to the top.
• "SLASH IS LIVING PROOF THAT NO MATTER HOW FAR YOU FALL INTO THE SPIRAL OF DRUGS AND ALCOHOL, YOU CAN TURN IT AROUND AND OPT FOR A HEALTHIER LIFE. IF HE WAS ABLE TO DO THIS AS A GUITARIST FOR ONE OF THE MOST HARD-CORE BANDS OF ALL TIME.”
• “VERY FEW PEOPLE UNDERSTAND WEALTH AS WELL AS SUZE ORMAN. SHE HAS HELPED SO MANY PEOPLE UNDERSTAND THEIR FINANCES, WHICH IS STRANGE BECAUSE SHE DIDN’T GROW UP WITH MUCH.”
– BERNARDO MOYA
– BERNARDO MOYA
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THE BEST YOU DIRECTORY The Best Professionals in Personal Development
UNITED KINGDOM
SPORTS THERAPISTS AND NUTRITIONISTS
Dr Stephen Simpson NLP, Hypnotherapy, and Havening Email: doc@drstephensimpson.com Website: www.drstephensimpson.com clients include leading names from the world of sport, business, and the entertainment industries.
Shayna Schulman Attitude adjuster and flexibility enhancer Email: Shayna.s@virgin.net Phone: +44 (0) 208 960 7715 Licensed trainer, coaching, consulting, yoga, nutrition
NLP TRAINERS Tina Taylor: Licensed Master Trainer and Practitioner Email: kay@the-me-group.com Phone: +44 (0) 7946 351640 Website: tina@tina-taylor.com Tina’s experience allows her to create and provide some very unique coaching services from stopping addictions to pregnancy and pain control.
Ulrika Shaw: Thrive consultant and hypnotherapist Email: enquiry@shawmind.co.uk Phone: +44 (0)7810 556029 Website: www.shawmind.co.uk Are you suffering from anxieties or depression? Maybe you’re struggling with bad habits such as overeating or smoking? I help people overcome anything that holds them back!
Geoff Rolls: Corporate Coach and Kinesiologist Email: geoff@geoffrolls.co.uk Phone: +44 (0)7905 056 513 Website: www.geoffrolls.co.uk Learning and development, NLP Trainer, TFH Kinesiology Instructor
June O’Driscoll: Exec Coach, Business Coach, Trainer Email: june@thoughtitude.co.uk Phone: +44 (0)7876 657 8055 Website: www.thoughtitude.co.uk NLP, Coaching and Hypnotherapy Training School and Consultancy
LIFE COACHES Dr Andrew A Parsons Mindfulness, Resilience and Finding Clear Purpose Email: aaparsons@reciprocalminds.com Phone: +44 (0)7854 029 268 Support people, build awareness and make changes for success
Dustin Vice Personal and Business Development Coaching Email: dustin@alliancecoachingsystem.com Website: www.alliancecoachingsystem.com Professional Coaching, Coaching Business system for professional coaches
Gail Cherry: Torchlight Coaching Email: gail@torchlightcoaching.co.uk Phone: +44 (0)1143 489 161 Website: www.torchlightcoaching.co.uk Helping people with their personal and professional development. We work together to be the best you.
Ruth Hepworth: Life Coach Email: ruth.hepworth@ntlworld.com Phone: +44 (0)1252 655 849
Those Life Consultant Guys: Coaching, Seminars. Business, goal setting and more. Website: www.thoselifeconsultantguys.com A coaching company who pride ourselves in helping you live your best life; every day, through one on one sessions and seminar programmes.
Nick Nanton Career and Life Coaching, Consultancy and Public Speaking Website: www.nicknanton.com Phone: (407) 215-7737 Recognised as one of the top thought-leaders in the business world
Edson Williams: Life Coaching Email: edson@leadbyexample.com Phone: +44(0)7867517777 Website: www.leadbyexample.com Specialising in leadership development and sport coaching
David Owen: Life Coach & NLP Trainer Email: bestyou@excel-yourself.com Phone: 07900 243494 Website: www.excel-yourself.com Stop smoking, slimming, phobias, relationships, stress, confidence, self-esteem.
THE BEST YOU DIRECTORY The Best Professionals in Personal Development
PHOBIA SPECIALISTS John Vincent Public speaking without fear Email: John@JohnVincent.tv Phone: +44 (0)7808 545 421 Website: www.johnvincent.tv
Paul Wright Phobias, Anxieties, Panic Attacks Email: paul@phobiagone.com Phone: +44 (0)203 086 8444 Website: www.phobiagone.com
NLP THERAPISTS / HYPNOTHERAPISTS Linda Cameron and Gail Walshe Inspire For Impact Email: say-hello@inspireforimpact.com Phone: +44 (0)845 601 7567 Website: www.inspireforimpact.com NLP Trainers, NLP Master Practitioners, NLP Life Coaches, Hypnotherapists
Debbie Williams Birmingham NLP Practice Group Website: www.debbiewilliams.co.uk Phone: +44 (0)121 241 0728 Life coaching, public speaking, sports coaching, all eating disorders, emotional mastery, OCD, stopping blushing, cocaine addiction, binge drinking.
Edson Williams Coaching, NLP, Personal Development Email: say-hello@inspireforimpact.com Phone: +44 (0) 7867517777 Website: www.leadbyexample.com With a holistic approach Edson is specialized in performance coaching
Laura Spicer: Public speaking skills and confidence Email: laura.spicer@gmail.com Phone: 01752 361 576 Website: www.laura-spicer.com The only accredited Sound Practice Trainer for the Society of NLP
EATING DISORDERS John Arroyo Coaching, Personal Development Email: john@johnarroyo.co.uk I have been a therapist and personal development trainer for 20 years, specialising in eating disorders for the last 10 years.
EUROPE
NLP TRAINERS
Pasquale Acampora (Italy) Master Trainer and Mental Coach, NLP, Team building Website: www.blackship.it Phone: +39 (0)335 70 99 000 Pasquale’s key areas are sport and business, he has worked with top athletes and multinational companies.
Alessandro Mora (Italy) Sport Coaching Email: a.mora@ekis.it Phone: +39 (0)522 337 611 Website: www.pnlekis.com NLP, coaching and team building applied to sport and business all over Italy
Xavier Pirla (Spain): NLP Master Trainer and NLP Coach Email: kay@the-me-group.com Phone: 91 002 84 44 (Madrid) 93 193 6449 (Barcelona) Website: www.the-me-group.com NLP, NLP Business Applications, Coaching workshops and Consultancy
Aleksander Sinigoj (Slovenia) Mastermind Academy Email: info@itnlp.com Website: www.aleksandersinigoj.com Leadership, Motivation, Sales, Business NLP
If you’d like to be featured on this list, please contact us on 0203 011 0866 or email advertising@thebestyou.co Visit www.thebestyoudirectory.co for more personal development professionals.
Bespoke lifestyle management, special events and personal concierge services Exceeding Your Expectations At Your Service Former international show jumper Dame Emma-Jane Brown talks about her new luxury personal concierge service and events company, EJB Events. “The company has been set up primarily for celebrities, sportsmen and women and high profile individuals who have little time to organise aspects of their busy lives. They may be looking for extraordinary experiences or simply a weekend away in an hideaway luxury hotel, whatever it is we will provide it,” she explains. She added: “I have spent the last year visiting some of the most incredible hidden gems across the globe to be able to lay on trips to some of the world’s most exclusive boutique venues and destinations. But our offering is so much more than this, we organise ‘Sex and the City’ shopping trips to New York City, access to top designers and international fashion shows, out of hours shopping in London’s top department stores, makeovers from leading image consultants and the latest treatments that Harley Street has to offer.” And for those women who prefer to entertain rather than cook, she provides celebrity and Michelin star chefs to prepare their dinner parties and private events. “It could make a dishonest woman out of some of them,” she laughs. The men have not been neglected either and Emma has access to some of the world’s top attractions. She added: “I have fabulous shooting and racing days, fishing trips and yacht charter in places like the US Virgin Islands, excursions to Las Vegas and trips to the best golf courses in the world.” She said: “I offer private jet charter too. Our service includes transfer to a private lounge, gourmet food during the flight and special customs clearance.” Emma says the concept of the EJB Events service was based around the knowledge of the life of a sports personality. As a professional show jumper for 20 years she remembers the long periods away from home and family and little time to organise anything outside sport. “It is vital families spend time together but from experience I know how hard it is to find the time to plan and organise things. In addition to my personal concierge service which takes care of the detail of people’s lives, I try to offer my clients experiences that will exceed their expectations.” Dame Emma-Jane Brown: 07799 115315 emma@ejbevents.co.uk www.ejbevents.co.uk
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21ST CENTURY LIVING
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The pace of change can sometimes bewilder, but it can also give amazing opportunities to meet new people, discover new things and thrive. Bring out the best in you by discovering the latest innovations that will put you ahead of the pack.
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WHAT’S IN A GAME?
Dr. Nicola Pallitt and Jennifer Caverhill battle it out in a debate as old as time – do video games cause violence?
FEEL-GOOD GADGETS
We look at some of the newest gadgets that have been designed to improve the quality of your life r
21ST CENTURY LIVING
THE BEST YOU
The argument regarding whether video games are beneficial or damaging is a debate as old as video games themselves. We think there’s nothing better than a good debate, so we got two conflicting opinions together to argue it out.
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A GAME? 62 | WWW.THEBESTYOUMAGAZINE.CO
THE BEST YOU
21ST CENTURY LIVING
PRO VIDEO GAMES
ANTI VIDEO GAMES
Nicola Pallitt, PhD, University of Cape Town
Jennifer Caverhill, Year Three Teacher, Notre Dame
Computer games are everywhere, and more and more independent games are being produced. But are violent computer games corrupting our youth? Or are these games an art form that can improve our understanding of the world. Regarding the debate on games and violence, I would say that as a feminist games researcher I take issue with the kinds of violent masculinities represented as aspirational in adult and teen-rated games that some children play. But games cannot be black boxed into the same category, just as one cannot claim that toy guns and Lego are the same kind of toy. There is a diverse range of games on offer nowadays, and some, such as Minecraft, are very constructive. For many children, gaming is a social activity that they do with peers, siblings and even parents. I found that a lot of children's digital play with peers is infused with more varieties of play than those one could expect to find on the playground. Although this play may be digitally mediated, it is far more familiar than exotic. Games may be new media, but when one observes how children interact with games, their play is similar in many ways. What fascinates me is that the games and violence debate is biased towards boys, largely ignoring girls. Boys play violent horror games and take pleasure in the camaraderie involved in killing aliens together. Children are active viewers and don't see games as equally violent: Resistance with its aliens is not the same as killing soldiers in Call of Duty. Children I spoke to had quite a sophisticated vocabulary when speaking about represented violence and the difference between fantasy and reality. The games and violence debate assumes that children are passive and are unable to make these kinds of interpretations. Parents and teachers need to be part of this conversation rather than dismissing games as media with negative effects that they need to protect children from. By being overly focused on protection, we are not gaining a better understanding of the role of games in children's lives. Proponents of the videogames-are-too-violent argument do children an injustice, not thinking about them as beings. Such arguments are often driven by assumptions about where exposure to violence leads. Supervised play is also assumed by a lot of age ratings on games. It is up to parents to negotiate appropriate game titles with their children.
While there is much talk in today’s society about video games causing violence, I firmly believe that that is a cop-out. The greater issue is that parents are not setting the proper boundaries for their children, or teaching them right from wrong in the real world. Video games on their own are not to blame, however, played irresponsibly they can negatively impact society. Video games are responsible for desensitising people to violence. While video and computer games have existed for years, the last decade has seen a proliferation of violent and aggressive games, especially those that immerse the gamer in first person. Connectivity has lead to a lack of accountability, which has lead to a breakdown in social communication – people sitting playing games for hours on end, grown men swearing at kids through headsets and vice versa. While producers place age restrictions on their more violent games, these restrictions are not policed. Parents are allowing their children to play at shooting people, with realistic graphics and sound effects, which is leading to violence and foul language becoming a normal part of young lives. Without boundaries, this spreads to school playgrounds and common speak. I believe they can cause a blur in the minds of what is acceptable behaviour and what is not in young minds. The lack of respect for themselves, and each other then breeds animosity between the game-players and those who in this blame-culture are looking for a scapegoat. I stand by my belief that while video games have a role to play, they are not the sole culprits. TV, film and popular music all have a role to play in the modern world’s desensitisation to violence and aggression. The solution to this is not easy – society leads us to believe parents have the right to let children do what makes them happy and there is no direct harm in playing games. As long as these games are played in moderation, my belief is that the greatest harm they can do to society is further desensitise gamers to violence, especially those who are susceptible and partial to violence anyway.
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21ST CENTURY LIVING
THE BEST YOU
LET’S GET TECHNICAL Some we need and some are just for fun, but The Best You scoured the Internet to bring you our favourite gadgets this summer. Isn’t technology a wonderful thing? We think so.
PORTABLE PHONE CHARGER With the long days and short nights, many of us tend to go out straight after work and stay out until the sun goes down. That’s great news for our social lives, but bad news for our phones’ battery life. Luckily, technology has kept up to date with out hectic lifestyles and you can now charge your phone wherever you are. Charge it up at home with a USB cable and keep it in your bag until you are running low on battery. Then just plug your phone into it and get charged up. No excuse to be out of contact again. Recommended retail price: £14.99
MINI PORTABLE RECHARGEABLE SPEAKERS These high-quality mini capsule speakers are perfect for portable or home use. They produce a surprisingly rich and loud sound, making listening to your music perfect, and they come with a built in rechargeable battery, which lasts up to 6 hours. The speakers are compatible with a 3.5mm plug that connects to MP3 and MP4 players, smartphones, iPods, Portable CD Players, tablets, PCs, and even minidisc players. They have 360-degree sound field and an LED power indicator that indicates when they are on and when they are charging. They can be easily recharged using a USB cable. Recommended retail price: £6.99
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THE BEST YOU 21ST
CENTURY LIVING
CREDIT CARD POCKET LIGHT Never be caught in the dark again with this ultra-thin LED light. It's the same size as a credit card, fitting easily into your wallet. When you need it, it opens up into a cool gadget in the shape of a hollow light bulb. All you have to do is flip up the light bulb and the light automatically turns on. The light bulb is LED, so it’s easy on battery power; a single 3V battery – included with the device – powers it. It is easy to carry around and so simple to use. Recommended retail price: £1.99
USB CUP WARMER We've all been there. You've just brewed yourself a steaming cup of liquid loveliness, you get back to your desk to a flurry of urgent emails, and by the time you've averted all manner of minor disasters like the superhuman workhorse that you are, your cup of steaming refreshment is stone cold. Worry not, office warrior, as we have a solution to your tepid tea dilemma in the rather lovely form of our USB Cup Warmer. Plug it into a spare USB port on your computer and the Cup Warmer will keep your beverage at the optimum operating temperature for as long as you care to leave it. Recommended retail price: £5.30
LOC8TOR LITE How many times have you turned the house upside down, been late for meetings, or even cancelled all your cards, just because you've mislaid your keys or wallet? Now there's a simple and cost-effective way to avoid this annoyance and uncertainty. The Loc8tor Lite is the ultimate locating device to help you keep track of your valuables, such as keys, TV remotes, cameras, mobile phones, wallets, purses, or even your car. The credit-card-sized tracking device will quickly locate and lead you to your lost possessions. As long as sight lines are clear, it has an incredible range that can extend up to 400 feet (122 metres) and it comes with a two-year manufacturers warranty. Recommended retail price: £44.99
SPYNET STEALTH VIDEO GLASSES These sunglasses are like something straight out of a James Bond film. Take films and photos without anyone knowing using Spynet Stealth Video Glasses. These crafty sunglasses have a hidden camera built in so you can record up to 20 minutes of video or snap 2,000 photos without anyone noticing. Perfect for top-secret surveillance or just freaking out your friends. Once you're done spying, link the glasses to your PC or Mac using the USB connector to examine the evidence. Spynet Stealth Video Glasses include a lithium polymer battery, which recharges via the USB port on your computer. Recommended retail price: £29.99
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To advertise here, please contact us on +44 (0) 203 011 0866 or email advertising@thebestyou.co
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