The Best You July 2013

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THE BEST

YOU

THE BEST YOU TRANSFORM

INSPIRE MOTIVATE ENRICH EMPOWER

ENJOY

JULY 2013 / PRICE £3.99

THE

‘D’ WORD

Life Without Limits

If you’re thinking about divorce, this is need-to-know information

LIVING WITH SMA Shane Burcaw might be living a nightmare, but he’s still laughing

DAVID BECKHAM WE LOOK AT WHAT MAKES HIM THE BEST AT PRETTY MUCH EVERYTHING HE DOES

THE VIRGIN DIET

THE CEO EXPERT

KUBI SPRINGER BRAND EXPERT

KRISTEN WHITE CHATS TO JJ VIRGIN ABOUT THE DIET THAT PUT HER ON THE MAP

ROGER HARROP TELLS US WHY HAVING FUN IN BUSINESS IS SO IMPORTANT

THE BRAND STRATEGIST CHATS ABOUT BUILDING YOUR PERSONAL BRAND

ALSO: WE LOOK AT THE LATEST TREND OF ACQHIRING

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JULY 2013

CONTENTS REGULARS 5 EDITOR’S LETTER

Bernardo Moya welcomes you to the latest issue of The Best You

31 BOOK REVIEWS We give you our top literary choices – a small selection of what’s available

64 TOP TIPS: GET ENERGISED! Angela Steel gives us some great advice about getting those energy levels up

FEATURES 8 ON THE BALL, OFF THE PITCH GENIUS ON THE FIELD AND STYLE ICON, DAVID BECKHAM IS THIS MONTH’S COVER STAR

8 ON THE BALL, OFF THE PITCH Genius on the field and style icon, David Beckham is this month’s cover star

12 A BECKS RETROSPECTIVE

We chat to captains of the football industry about the recent retiree’s on- and off-field antics

15 THE WILL TO WIN

Bernardo Moya chats to Humphrey

Walters about sailing the world and winning the Rugby World Cup

INNER YOU 20 HEALING THROUGH HYPNOSIS Hypnotherapist Debbie Williams tells us a bit more about spontaneous healing

22 THE PLACEBO EFFECT Joel Brown talks to us about sugar pills and fake remedies

26 THE USUAL SUSPECTS CONTINUING WITH OUR BUCKET LIST COLUMN, WE LOOK AT THOSE ITEMS THAT KEEP POPPING UP

ENJOY LIFE 26 THE USUAL SUSPECTS

Continuing with our Bucket List column, we look at those items that keep popping up

28 TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE

Author and tenacious survivor

Mel Carnegie says your life belongs to no one but you

THE BEST YOU No. 9 · July 2013 · Year 1 · EDITOR / PUBLISHER Bernardo Moya · DEPUTY EDITOR Zoë Henry · ASSOCIATE EDITOR Matthew Wingett · GRAPHIC DESIGN · Joanna Frackiewicz · NEW MEDIA · Allan Banford · TECHNICAL CONSULTANT Martin Carter · ADVERTISING · Ruby Visaria advertising@thebestyou.co · The Best You Corporation LTD 5 Percy St. · London, United Kingdom, W1T 1DG · Tel: +44 (0)845 230 2033 · www.thebestyou.co

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JULY 2013

CONTENTS

LIVE LOVE LEGACY

44 CALLING IT QUITS

With so many marriages ending in divorce, we look at how to deal with the aftermath

46 LAUGHING AT MY NIGHTMARE Shane Burcaw tells us the truth about living with Spinal Muscular Atrophy

FEEL & LOOK GOOD 50 LIKE A VIRGIN

Kristen White chats to JJ Virgin about her diet that’s all about finding what’s right for you

52 IN THE SUMMERTIME

44 CALLING IT QUITS WITH SO MANY MARRIAGES ENDING IN DIVORCE, WE LOOK AT HOW TO DEAL WITH THE AFTERMATH

Packing for your summer holidays? Nicky Hambleton-Jones gives her expert advice on what to take along

54 IT’S THE GOOD NEWS

So much of the news we read is bad. Here are some stories to lift your spirits

WEALTH & RICHES 57 FUN IN BUSINESS

Bernardo Moya chats to Roger Harrop about how what he learnt in the past helps him now

58 HOW TO BE A TOP… SALES EXECUTIVE

Do you have the gift of the gab? Perhaps you can turn it into a profit

60 YOU ARE YOUR BRAND Bernardo Moya chats to brand specialist Kubi Springer about building your brand

62 THE ROCKY ROAD TO SUCCESS The Best You looks at some inspirational people from history who didn’t have success handed to them on a silver platter

21 CENTURY LIVING ST

68 LOST IN TRANSLATION JOKES IN TEXT FORM CAN BE EASY TO MISINTERPRET. WE LOOK AT THIS NEW-AGE INCONVENIENCE

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66 THE FAT CATS AND THE LITTLE GUYS App developer Rahul Gulati tells us all about acqhiring in the world of technology

68 LOST IN TRANSLATION

Jokes in text form can be easy to misinterpret.

We look at this new-age inconvenience

THE BEST YOU

EDITORIAL

EDITORIAL

WHAT DOES IT TAKE TO BE THE BEST?

I

n the month that we hear that David Beckham, the world’s highest-paid footballer is to retire from the game, it’s a question well worth asking.

In The Best You this month, we put David Beckham under the microscope to find clues about his life.

The lessons we learn from him are true for so many of the world’s great achievers.

While there are a myriad of factors that feed success, the common denominators shared by so many of the world’s greatest successes are... you guessed it ... hard work, application and a willingness to learn.

If you’re like most of us, you might be good at what you do; but there are areas where you need help. That’s perfectly normal. Everyone has things they are great at and others they’d rather never have to do.

You may have tried to do a number of things on your own and have experienced varied levels of success. Working by

ourselves, without outside help, almost always leads to poor results. No matter what we do or try, it doesn’t work the way it should. Remember to learn from others. The most successful people and businesses are willing to learn and actively ask for help. Pride is not part of the equation, even when keeping sight of your true values and reason for being.

In order to be the best, to run a successful practise, a shop, a career, become a better athlete, you need to be able to either be an expert in a number of areas, have access to people with the knowledge, or learn from the greats by reading their autobiographies.

What’s great is most experts love sharing their knowledge. You don’t get many who are over-protective about what they know. It’s part of their mental make-up to give away advice and great value information I’ve always been fascinated by reading about the lives of the greats and that’s what we’re giving you this month

If you want to make your dreams come true, the first thing you have to do is wake up.

and for the years to come. We’ll carry on speaking with the biggest minds to find out what makes them great. Through our interviews and the panel of experts we talk to all the time, we’re here to help you build up that picture of what you need to be great, too.

Who knows, maybe in a few years we’ll be interviewing you, too.

Enjoy

– J.M. Power

BERNARDO MOYA, Editor

Follow me: @Bernardo_Moya

WE WANT YOUR STORIES The Best You is all about inspiring people.

If you have a tale to tell that you think will help someone become the best they can be, please tell us.

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THE BEST YOU CONTRIBUTORS

ANGELA STEEL

is a Nutritional Therapist and expert on weight loss, metabolic health and diabetes. She also runs healthy cooking classes in London. Check out her website at www. superwellness.co.uk

@SocioWellBeing

MEL CARNEGIE

is straight talking and committed to being the best that she can be.

Founder of successful leadership development company, DeNA, she is also a survivor. Her experiences have all played a part in strengthening her spirit, making her determined to share her story so that it may help others.

@Mel_Carnegie

DEBBIE WILLIAMS

JOEL BROWN

@FreeNLPHypnosis

@Addictd2Success

is an award winning media coach who helps entrepreneurs and businesses become more powerful messengers with content creation and on-camera coaching. Her company, Creative Catapult Video, is the premier media production company for the wellness and personal development marketplace.

NICKY HAMBLETONJONES

RAHUL GULATI

SHANE BURCAW

is an NLP trainer, hypnotherapist and expert in eating disorders and addictions from Birmingham. She runs online programmes to help with binge eating and weight loss as well as seeing clients one on one for these disorders. www.debbiewilliams. co.uk

is a household name, a pioneer in reinvention and purveyor of reigniting one’s youth and inner sparkle. She’s at the forefront of the fashion and beauty industries, making it her business to find the best solutions to help women look and feel younger.

@NHJStyle

is the CEO and Founder of Addicted2Success. com. With a passion for entrepreneurship, self development and success, Joel started his website with the intention of educating and inspiring likeminded people all over the world to strive for success, no matter what their circumstances.

is a technology enthusiast and has been working with start-ups in the Mobile Internet sector for over three years. He is hooked on to smartphone apps and tweets frequently. You can read his blog here: http://RahulGulati.in

@RahulGulati

KRISTEN WHITE

@RippleffectTV

is a 20-years-old living with a disease called Spinal Muscular Atrophy.

He has been in a wheelchair since he was two. He loves to laugh and thinks his life is pretty funny. He recently started a non-profit to spread positivity and raise money for muscular dystrophy research.

@shaner528

The Best You is published by The Best You Corporation Ltd, 5 Percy Street, W1T 1DG. Opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect The Best You Corporation Ltd policy.

The Best You Corporation Ltd accepts no responsibility for views expressed by its contributors. advertisements and reader offers are not endorsed by The Best You or The Best You Corporation Ltd.

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COVER STORY THE BEST YOU

ON THE BALL OFF THE PITCH With David Beckham’s announcement that he is to retire from professional football, The Best You looks at the life and achievements, of this hero of The Beautiful Game, on-pitch and off.

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O

ne of the world’s greatest footballers, fashion icon, sex symbol, “Golden Balls”, England football team captain, half of Posh and Becks, loving father and all round decent guy, David Beckham has had a massive effect on the world far beyond his home turf of football.

The association of his iconic brand with a product guarantees to raise its profile, and it’s no surprise that clubs have clamoured to sign him as much for his effect on their balance sheets as his particular brand of on-pitch magic.

Counting Tom Cruise, Katie Homes and Elton John among his friends, Beckham remains a loving family man, dedicated to the happiness and safety of his wife and four children. He is a truly international figure and is often called the world’s most famous footballer.

So how did he achieve this amazing life? And where did he come from?

Born in 1975 in Leytonstone and growing up in Chingford, David Beckham had a very ordinary beginning.

His dad, Ted, a heating engineer, instilled in him his passion for football. “As soon as I could walk,” David says, “he made sure I had a football to kick.” Growing up happy and safe with his hairdresser mum

MAIN PICTURE With smouldering good looks and a very talented right foot, Beckham makes success look easy

ABOVE AND BELOW David Beckham has had loads of experience in front of the camera

Sandra, his dad and extended family allowed that passion to flourish.

Ted also planted the dream of being a professional footballer. Both parents loved Manchester United and they often took him to Old Trafford to watch United games. No surprise that from an early age, David was telling everyone, “I’m going to play football for Manchester United.”

As a boy David played football above his level with kids twice his age at Chase Lane Park, near his school.

“I don’t know if it was because I was good or because they could kick me up in the air and I’d come back for more, but they always turned up on the doorstep after school.”

His dad recognised his talent and when David was around 8 years old, he sacrificed his own playing to coach his son, taking David for midweek training at Wadham Lodge, a neglected old ground near his home. David recalls: “...the changing rooms were pure Sunday League: mud on the floor, really dingy lighting and the water dribbling out of cold showers. Then there was the smell of the liniment that players used to rub on their legs. It would hit you as soon as you walked in. There were floodlights – just six lamps on top of poles – but at least once every session they’d go out and somebody would have to run

and put coins in a meter that was in a cupboard just inside the changing room door.”

His dad’s coaching was unrelenting: “After everybody else had finished and was in the social club, I’d stand on the edge of the penalty area and chip a dead ball towards goal.

Every time I hit the bar was worth 50p extra pocket money from my dad that week. And just as important, a pat on the back.”

Also at the club, David joined in the five-a-side sessions his father played in - meaning that again he was playing above his level. This instilled resilience as well as enthusiasm.

“I was so excited to be out there playing with the rest of them – these grown men – that I took whatever I had coming.

Dad warned me that I had to be prepared to get a bit roughed up now and again. If he’d been running around telling people not to tackle me all evening, it would have been pointless me being there in the first place.”

His dad made sure David enjoyed the play, and allowed him to develop his style. This is an important factor - David loves football because it is associated with that great emotional reward - of being able to be who you truly are.

All the while David kept his eyes focussed on what he wanted. “What kept me going was the idea that, eventually,

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At their wedding, David was terrified of giving he groom’s speech, and he describes himself as “shy” when younger I’d get the call I’d been waiting for ever since I’d first kicked the ball” – to play for Manchester United.

When the call came, David was ready. He was talent scouted by Manchester United at 14 years old. It was a dream come true.

In Manchester he was surrounded by exceptional fellow players, including Gary Neville, Ryan Giggs, Paul Scholes, Nicky Butt, Ben

Thornley and Chris Casper. He had no idea that the youth team was special, but Alex Ferguson did, saying: “If we don’t get a first-team player out of this lot, we might as well all pack up and go home.”

David was now among players as excellent as himself.

Manchester United won the Youth Team Cup in 1992, and was runner up to Leeds in 1993.

Aged 17, Beckham finally

ABOVE David is as much of a family man as he is a fotballer BELOW David and his boys in LA Galaxy gear

When my foot struck that ball, it kicked open the door to the rest of my life at the same time.

got to play in the last 17 minutes of a first team match.

“I was so excited I jumped off the bench and cracked my head on the roof of the dugout: a great start to a first-team career.”

In 1994 he scored his first goal for the club in an international against Galatasaray. With humour and modesty he recalls that Eric Cantona came over to congratulate him. “He was having to fight me off in the end. I just wouldn’t let go of him. I’ve scored a goal and I’m celebrating with Eric Cantona.”

In 1996 he was on the team that won the FA CUP and finished top of the league, making Manchester United the only team to win the Double twice.

Then, something special happened. At the opening of the 96 / 97 season, Beckham scored his famous 60 yard goal against Wimbledon from his own half. For him, years of learning to strike the ball hard meant this was just an “ordinary” kick, but it propelled him to stardom. He says of the fame it brought him, “When my foot struck that ball, it kicked open the door to the rest of my life at the same time.”

Beckham’s life since has been fascinating. His marriage to Victoria Adams aka Posh Spice created the most glamorous couple in Britain, possibly the world. Yet their

first date (after he’d finally plucked up the courage to ask her out) ended in their being thrown out of an abandoned Chinese restaurant when they tried to order drinks without food.

It’s a fascinating reminder that excellence at one thing doesn’t mean universal brilliance. At their wedding, David was terrified of giving the groom’s speech, and he describes himself as “shy” when younger. Beckham was a bundle of amazing footballing talent, but he was also a normal kid growing to manhood.

Along the way Beckham weathered violent storms.

During the 1998 World Cup match against Argentina he was largely blamed for England crashing out of the tournament after being sent off for retaliating to a pat on the head by Argentinian player Simeone. His effigy was hung from lamp-posts in Britain, and his face was published as a dartboard by the Daily Mirror.

He received death threats against himself and his family, and even found an intruder in his garden early one morning, standing with arms crossed, staring intimidatingly.

Yet Beckham is resilient. In 1999 he helped his side to win the Treble. At the 2002 World

Cup captaining England against Greece, he won the game with a last minute free kick, becoming the darling of the media and the nation. He made 115 appearances for England and captained them for six years.

He was famously cut above the eye by a flying boot from Alex Ferguson in an argument and in the end, after Manchester United and Becks parted company he went on to play for Real Madrid and Los Angeles Galaxy, becoming the highest paid footballer in the world.

That said, Beckham is clear, for him it’s not about individuals but the team working together. During the post-Argentina years, and later when he felt picked on and isolated by Sir Alex Ferguson for his “film star” attitude, Beckham relied on the team to lift him during matches.

This is how he talks about family, too, saying that the number one role of a father is his family’s protection.

Beckham is always aware of the bigger unit of which he is a part, and it’s this that makes him such a great team player and a great family man.

Perhaps it’s ironic then that the massive jump in merchandise sales to $600 million at Real Madrid between

He received death threats against himself and his family, and even found an intruder in his garden early one morning, standing with arms crossed, staring.

BELOW The Beckhams enjoy having a day out

2003-2007 was largely attributed by Forbes magazine to this one man’s presence.

The same effect was noted at LA Galaxy in 2007 when their gate receipts reached record levels, and they were able to negotiate a massive shirt sponsorship deal worth $20 million – largely thanks to his arrival.

Looking back over the life of the boy from Chingford coached by his dad to strike a ball hard and accurately, what are the ingredients that make him such a star?

Strong emotion is definitely part of the mix. The love he felt for the game as a boy, the tears he shed when the talent scout called for him, the passion he feels on the pitch that sets him on fire all tell of that. His reliance on a team – or a family – to support him is another ingredient. Add to that resilience, too.

Less obviously, he has recently revealed he suffers from OCD, needing to put things in neat lines or in pairs.

Repetitive dedication to an activity leads to excellence, and you can’t help wondering, did OCD feed into his desire to get those kicks absolutely right on the pitch?

These are all ingredients of what makes Beckham who he is. Sprinkle in film star looks and a celebrity wife... these are all factors.

But there is something else, too. David Beckham is authentic. You get the feeling that what you see is what you get.

And what you see is an honest, straightforward guy who sometimes makes mistakes - but also has the most extraordinary skills. That makes for someone special, and someone supremely likeable – and admirable, too.

At The Best You we salute David Beckham – and wish you The Best – whatever you do next!

b

This article was based on excerpts of David Beckham’s book, My Side.

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PROFILE THE BEST YOU THE BEST YOU

A BECKS

RETRO SPECTIVE DR. GARY F. RUSSELL TALENT STRATEGIST Beckham’s strategy means he will go down as the most influential person in in popularising football here in The United States. The beginning signs of that strategy are occurring now. We have a couple of new football clubs here that would make you feel as if you’re in England.

The crowds are singing, the stadiums are great and the advertising has increased because Beckham has made everything cool and hip. Other superstars, like (Thierry) Henry are following his lead and realising that it’s a good thing to finish out their careers here.

What the world needs to know and is constantly trying to figure out is why is he so good. Why is he so different?

What makes him the greatest marketing tool in the world?

He’s a good-looking lad and he has a beautiful wife, but there must be more to it. There are plenty of people out there who are pretty good-looking, but he has been successful in virtually every sphere – football, fatherhood, corporately, and in his demeanour.

Beckam has a brand, so he gives life to anything he touches. His only concern is to carefully choose what it is that he’s touching so that he can control the development of whatever it is he’s involved in, because he has that magnetism. He is a winner. Now we need to figure out why.

TIM LOVEJOY BROADCASTER

I spent a few months with David Beckham making a documentary about him after he moved to Real Madrid.

It’s hard to say a bad word about him as he was a genuinely nice guy with a huge desire to play football. He loved his life, especially his job. He had dreamed about being a big star in football so when he was given the chance he worked hard at achieving the status he desired.

Beckham’s work ethic has been well documented. While other players went home after training, Beckham put in the extra hours. It clearly paid off as he has had a career most footballers could only dream of. Incredible football career, but I don’t think we’ve heard the last of him.

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RYAN TUNNICLIFFE FOOTBALLER FOR MANCHESTER UNITED

As a youngster growing up supporting Manchester United, David Beckham was one of the players I looked up to.

There is no doubt about that. He has had an unbelievable career that I’m sure even in his wildest dreams he would never have anticipated when he first started to play football. One of the things I admire most about him is that no matter how many trophies he won, how many caps he had or how much money he’d earned his passion, his commitment and desire to continually improve never faded. These types of qualities have made him one of the all-time greats of world football.

THE BEST YOU

PROFILE

KUBI SPRINGER BRAND SPECIALIST

STEPHEN SIMPSON ELITE PERFORMANCE & CONFIDENCE COACH What makes David Beckham one of the greatest soccer players the world has ever seen? It is an exquisite balance of mind, body, and soul, working in perfect harmony.

Beckham’s mental strength has been tested on numerous occasions by adversity, including serious injuries, and he describes his red card against Argentina in the 1998 World Cup as the lowest point of his life. He was vilified by both the English press and the fans and was widely blamed for England’s defeat. During this time he received numerous death threats, and did not feel safe for over three years.

Beckham’s humble view of a ‘round world’, where success at the top is always followed by failure at the bottom, was his solid foundation. He knew that success would inexorably follow failure as long as he remained grounded by the three qualities he considered to be the most valuable. They were belief, strength, and family.

An example of his belief is his expression ‘impossible is nothing.’ His strength flows from his application. One of his previous managers, Alex Ferguson, stated, “David Beckham is Britain’s finest striker of a football, not because of god-given talent, but because he practices with a relentless application that the vast majority of less-gifted players wouldn’t contemplate.”

The importance that Beckham places on his family to his success is also legendary.

Beckham loves drawing and painting, and it is clear from his interviews that he has highly developed visualisation skills, which are essential for all top athletes. He has over twenty tattoos, and he has chosen them carefully. Each makes a visual statement that resonates deeply with him.

They include tattoos relating to his family, and intriguingly, an angel on his right shoulder, with the words ‘In the face of adversity.’

Beckham’s career has had more than its share of ups and downs, and my vote for the one quality that that makes him such a special person is the way that he has handled adversity. He has demonstrated role model mastery of the importance of belief, strength, and family to his success.

David Beckham is extremely smart to retire at the top of his game. I believe that by doing so, the strength of his brand has become an even stronger commodity. As a world class, global icon who has carried the British flag wherever he has played, Beckham’s brand possibilities are endless. He could continue to take on ‘ambassador’ roles, as he did for the London 2012 Olympics. He could continue to sign endorsement deals; his latest signings to Sainsbury’s, Burger King and Samsung, are examples of this. He could also think about signing a club, putting his name to more academies, launching more charities, entering onto the board of sports committees and association internationally. He could do more partnerships with Victoria with their own clothing lines and fragrances.

Equally he could write (or ghost write) another autobiography, produce a movie about his life, star in Hollywood blockbusters, act as an agent or manager for his boys, who are also developing their own brands. There is talk of him exercising his rights to buy an MLS franchise, Times Warner Cable were reportedly trying to lure him to one of their new TV sports networks and of course let’s not forget the possibility of a Knighthood.

As a brand specialist I think that ‘brand Beckham’ has only really just started. This move to end at the top is strategic and brilliant. Worth an estimated $300 million, his next move could prove to see him double that and be noted down in history as one of the greatest sports brands ever.

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BECKS AT A GLANCE FOOTBALLING ROLL OF HONOUR Manchester United

Paris Saint-Germain

Six premier league championships Two FA Cups Won UEFA Champions Recognised as ”UEFA Club Footballer of the Year” in 1999 Scored 62 goals

Won the Championship

LA Galaxy

England

115 appearances Scored 17 goals Captain for six years

Real Madrid

Won Spanish,Super Cup Spanish League Championship

Two straight championships

STYLE

EARNINGS

Voted one the world’s best dressed men in: • Daily Mail • Metro • MSN • Complex.com

The world’s highest paid footballer Estimated at £30.8 million per annum Has been in the top 10 paid footballers since 1999 Has topped the list for six years Recently signed £50m five-year deal as ambassador for Chinese Super League

CHARITABLE INTERESTS  CHOC Children’s  Comic Relief  Elton John AIDS Foundation  FC Harlem  Help for Heroes  Malaria No More  mothers2mothers  National Society for the  Prevention of Cruelty to Children  Peace One Day  Prince’s Trust  Raising Malawi  Red Cross  Sport Relief  UNICEF  Victoria and David Beckham Charitable Trust Beckham donated his entire salary at Paris Saint Germaine to charity.

Has made numerous statements with hairstyles over the years, including the famous floppy fringe, mini mohawk, buzz cut and ponytail.

Watch out for future follicle fun! His clothes have also made a stir, including the famous Sarong and the Alice band on his hair. But Beckham looks cool in a suit or in casual gear, and has been a style icon for men for years.

OTHER ACHIEVEMENTS Key role in 2012 London Olympic bid Delivered the Olympic flame by speed boat to London Olympics Officer of the Order of the British Empire UNICEF Goodwill Ambassador Founder of David Beckham Academy football school Had the film ”Bend It Like Beckham” named after his ability to curve the ball The only English player to score in three World Cups

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FAMILY Married to Victoria Beckham (aka Posh Spice) Brooklyn (born 1999) Romeo (born 2002) Cruz (born 2005) Harper (born 2011)

THE BEST YOU

FEATURE

THE WILL TO WIN Humphrey Walters wanted to find out about leadership, so he entered the BT Global Challenge and sailed around the world. Bernardo Moya finds out about leadership, global yacht racing and winning the Rugby World Cup.

A

powerful public speaker and expert on leadership who has inspired the very best, Humphrey Walters knows how to get things done – and he’s tested his ideas in some of the world’s most extreme conditions.

After growing up in West Africa, Humphrey was sent to England at the age of 12 and didn’t see his parents again till he was 20. He is convinced this helped him understand people better.

“What that developed in me... is the ability to integrate,” he says. “I had to stay with families so I did whatever they did and it taught me how to integrate, taught me self sufficiency, all the things that I really value and, in fact, have really made me what I am.”

So, did his prolonged separation from his parents to him harm?

“It was very interesting. I had a close relationship with my parents when they came back and that was all fine,” he says.

Seeing so many different parents and the ways they

What that developed in me... is the ability to integrate.

I had to stay with families so I did whatever they did and it taught me how to integrate

interacted with the world was a learning experience.

“I would watch the dad who might have been a lawyer or a coffee broker or a teacher, how they operated and I just thought ‘wow, you know, one day maybe I can use some of these examples.’ So it’s all about observance and taking ideas and saying ‘I can do that in my own way.’”

Characteristically humble he does not consider himself academically brilliant. Indeed, he laughs when he says he moved to Canada to take a degree in PPE because it “was the easiest degree in the planet... They had a great entry system. If you were capable

of physically walking through the gates and sign your name, they’d have you.”

Flexibility and willingness to learn have been the guiding light of his life. Variously a journalist interviewing people about success, a writer, a consultant and a teacher showing top businessmen how to write more effectively, he has continually adjusted.

His early writing work gave him the opportunity to watch some of the most powerful businesspeople in the country operate and one of his early mentors was Marcus Sieff, Chairman of Marks & Spencer.

He built on the skills he learned to set up his own business

WATCH HUMPHREY WALTERS TALK TO BERNARDO MOYA IN THE BEST YOU INTERVIEW ABOVE Humphrey Walters knows about leadership

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running a management training company for 20 years.

Always learning and changing, his life took a dramatic new direction in 1995 when he realised he needed a new challenge. He sold up and, aged 55, decided he properly test his theories about leadership in some of the world’s most extreme conditions.

He says he was “passionate about leadership” but adds: “What I realised was that most of the people who wrote about it had never really done it,” he says. “I decided for the rest of my career I was going to examine what you do with leaders and teams when times are tough.”

Was this sudden change daunting?

“My professor at university had told me that you can be an expert in anything in two years... So I decided to get out there and find a case study,” he says. “That’s when I volunteered to sail around the world, the wrong way.” This was the 11-month-long BT Global Challenge.

he was watching TV at home.

Fourteen identical ships would race around the globe against prevailing winds in a tough, hard race.

A “small detail” was that he had never sailed in his life.

“In fact, 70 per cent had never sailed,” he adds. “They were picked on enthusiasm because if you’ve got somebody with enthusiasm you can teach them almost anything.”

After being picked for the long list, potential crew members are observed during

The idea came to him as

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ABOVE Humphrey Walters taking part in the BT Global Challenge

BELOW All geared up and ready to sail

their initial training - and are eventually thrown together to make a team at random.

In fact, Humphrey found all the new learning pretty hard, and as such he has become a strong advocate of learning something new all the time, now setting himself two new tasks every year.

Once the teams were picked, the first job was to build the boat. He got a great insight from his captain, was an exRoyal Navy officer.

While all the other teams set to at building, Humphrey’s captain sent them for two weeks’ teambuilding in a house in the middle of Dartmoor saying, “the most important thing is for us to get to know each other.” Of all the yachts to return back, his was the only one to retain the full original crew. The average turnover rate on all the yachts was 35 per cent.

For the next 11 months his crew battled against 140 mile an hour winds and mountainous seas through some of the most inhospitable waters on the planet. At times, he recalls: “We were 2,500 miles south of any shipping so you’ve got no chance of being rescued... The only other potential rescue is your other boats.”

On the voyage the crew got a maximum of two hours

sleep in any one rest period.

They didn’t win, but came in seventh after getting caught in a hurricane. The camaraderie on board remained high with no dropout of crew, which Humphrey regards as the real triumph of the team.

On his return, Clive Woodward, coach for the England Rugby Union team, approached him for help building a team. Humphrey’s work contributed to World Cup triumph. So how did he do it?

“The key thing was self belief. We’re just as big and strong and ugly as everybody else but it was the self belief that we could take on these guys,” he says. “One of the major things I did was to always examine things we did well before we examined things we did badly.”

The team’s first tour was the “tour of hell” he confides.

It was extremely tough and the press told them not to bother coming home. But Humphrey kept them going. “I said we’re never getting headlines like this ever again. I promise you that. I don’t know what we’re going to do but if we’ve got the resolve they’ll never write this stuff.”

One of the first things they did was decide on a cause, and Humphrey says proudly: “Our duty was to inspire the nation so that all the people who maybe don’t like rugby, they’ll tell us they remember where they were and who they were with when we won the World Cup. So I said that means that all our behaviours, work ethic, everything, has got to say ‘I’m participating in inspiring the nation.’”

The second piece of advice he gave the team was to get them to break it down to “a game of inches”. This meant approaching everything with fresh eyes and seeing where they could add excellence. As Humphrey puts it: “Winners don’t do different things, they just do things differently.”

The team’s success was legendary, as the World Cup

was won in the 35 seconds of extra time. “Don’t ever tell me winning doesn’t matter because if it didn’t, why do you keep the score?”

Since then, Humphrey has been involved in working with excellence at every turn. He helped the JCB team win the world’s land speed record for a diesel engine, he works with Chelsea football club, with Surrey Cricket Club and with the England football team.

He puts one of his major skills down to being able to see through to the heart of the matter, without getting wound up with too much of the “guff” a common theme among many of the people I’ve interviewed who are great leaders and entrepreneurs.

When asked about what makes a great leader, he answers: “All the great leaders… most of them, have started with a desire to do something for other people. I think you’ve got to have that. It’s not money. The second thing they have is an amazing ability to get people to like them and follow them, by being true to their word. I think the third, and probably the most important thing, is they know what the process is and then they find people to help them and practice. They’re not frightened to go out and ask other people.”

HUMPHREY WALTERS AT A GLANCE:  Grew up in West Africa till he was 12  Lived with many different families in the UK  Volunteered for the BT Global Challenge aged 55  Admires military approach to team-building  Inspired the England Rugby Union Word Cup winning team  Continues to work in the fields of excellence  Gives talks to inspire others to great leadership

Winners don’t do different things, they just do things differently.

BELOW Humphrey takes on a new challenge each year

In fact, a degree of humility and curiosity are what Humphrey recommends. He has a copse in Devon where he lives, in which he has planted every single tree after he received useful advice from others. So, what do those trees represent?

“That somebody came along and said ‘have you thought of this, you ought to be doing that. Sometimes a kick up the backside.’”

b

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HEALING THROUGH HYPNOSIS Hypnotherapist Debbie Williams tells us a bit more about spontaneous healing

THE PLACEBO EFFECT Joel Brown talks to us about sugar pills and fake remedies

INNER YOU

DEBBIE WILLIAMS

HYPNOSIS FOR HEALING

Maybe you are struggling with an illness and it’s getting you down.

Healing hypnosis doesn’t claim to cure, but may make you feel better within yourself right now.

Hypnotherapist and NLP trainer Debbie Williams showcases a few miracles.

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H MAIN PICTURE Healing can be down to the power of positive thought

ealing hypnosis has been known to contribute to spontaneous remissions. This is where diseases seemingly disappear for no known reason and the person recovers either fully or temporarily from a condition in a manner that cannot be attributed to medical intervention alone.

Albert was able to reverse his diabetes from 19.7 to normal through listening to my healing hypnosis recording regularly and making some important changes to his diet. Rosie took a copy of the recording to America when her brother was involved in a horrific car crash and the doctors wanted to switch off the life support. She used the recording everyday and after 55 days he came out of the coma and lived. Rosie said

DEBBIE WILLIAMS INNER YOU

The doctors had told him they had done their job, so the idea was in Granddad’s head that the cancer was retreating it helped her and her brother said he could hear the healing hypnosis and it gave him hope.

And despite losing limbs in the car crash, he never suffered with phantom limb pain.

Other amputees have said it has helped them, as well as those suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). Patrick (a fellow NLP Trainer) says the healing hypnosis helped his body normalise a thyroid problem, and the doctors couldn’t believe it.

My granddad was riddled with cancer. They sent him home telling him they had done what they could for him. These were the days when patients were never told the worst-case scenario. The doctors told my uncle that Granddad had about six weeks to live, but he didn’t know that.

Four months later he was called back to the hospital. The doctors couldn’t understand why he was still around! When they examined him, they found that all the tumours had shrunk.

The doctors had told him they had done their job, so the idea was in Granddad’s head that the cancer was retreating – and his body agreed. He lived for another seven years, and eventually died of a stroke, completely unrelated to the cancer.

Debbie also cites spontaneous remission in the case of friend Ann-Alicia, who at just 26 years old developed a rare condition that causes the immune system to attack itself.

BY ALEXANDRA TRUTA

INTO THE SNAKE PIT It started with a viral infection that Ann couldn’t shake off, and it took two years before she was finally diagnosed with mixed connective tissue disorder. Her muscles would seize up without warning, and she could not resist infection.

Doctors were unable to offer Ann much hope. They gave her series of drugs, including steroids, but other than that they could only promise to make her more comfortable if her condition got worse.

The turning point came for Ann when she discovered a doctor called Dr Joel Fuhrman, who said he could help her. Dr Fuhrman’s technique would involve controlled fasting, helping the body reach a point at which it could clear out what was no longer needed – including the disease. The only problem was that it would take several visits – and Dr Fuhrman was based in America.

I was among the group of Ann’s friends who set about raising the money she needed to fund the treatments and trips to New Jersey. When the money was there, Ann flew out to see Dr Fuhrman with the idea of spontaneous remission firmly in her mind. She went from being able to go out one day a week and spending maybe two or three days in bed, to being able to go out three days a week and being in bed just one day a week. She isn’t cured, but it has changed her life enormously. b

Using the NLP skills, which I was recently taught during a practitioner training with Dr. Bandler, has literally pushed me to walk into the ‘snake pit’, which I have always feared, and never faced.

I remember the feelings of despair and terror that took over me as soon as I saw the enormous python being brought in on stage. The next thing I knew, I was pushing desperately through the crowds in search for the nearest exit, feeling heavy tears pouring down my face. My phobia was so present, and stronger than I ever imagined it to be.

The next thing I remember, after nearly passing out with fear, was two NLP coaches holding me, telling me to breathe and talking me back into a state of calm and awareness.

About an hour later, after completing a short but efficient NLP phobia exercise, there I was, facing the snakes, holding them, and feeling a strong sense of pride and strength within every fibre of my body. I thought to myself, if I can get over this fear in such a short time, I can get over anything, and more than that, I can do anything I set my mind to. I also thought that after spending so many years feeling afraid of snakes, I never realised just how fascinating they are, and how cool it is to hold and admire them. It’s an incredible feeling, when you replace a strong phobia, with an even stronger sense of pride.

If you would like to see your story published, send it to: marketing@thebestyou.co

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INNER YOU

JOEL BROWN

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JOEL BROWN

A

lthough placebos are not actually reacting to the ailment, one out of three individuals claims to have a reaction to the fake medicine. When a person’s symptoms change due to this “fake remedy,” it is called the “Placebo Effect.”

However, sometimes the effect can go in the opposite direction and patients believe that the “fake medicine” is causing disagreeable or worse symptoms. This is known as the “Nocebo Effect“.

Time and time again doctors paint the placebo effect in a negative light, but why?

Is it all too hard to understand or even admit that what it all boils down to is the power of the mind? And that it is actually possible to heal or destroy through the power of imagination.

The NCCAM, National Centre for Complementary and Alternative Medicine, a branch of the National Institute of Health states yes, “there is significant proof,” that the mind can have a positive influence on mental functioning and quality of life.” Holistic doctor, the late Carl T. Javert, a believed that illnesses were frequently psychosomatically brought about by emotional stress. He assisted women during pregnancy to supervise their problems and difficulties in order to prevent miscarriages and other impediments.

With the placebo effect, an individual experiences what they “expect to happen.” If the expectation is to feel better or worse, either could occur. The placebo in itself had nothing to do with the effects directly.

However, the person’s “belief” helped to change the outcome.

Imagine harnessing that tremendous power of the mind and envisioning an outcome so strongly that it transcends your

INNER YOU

Without a doubt, many of you have heard of placebos – a substance or some other treatment given to a person that looks like standard medicine, but it is not.

Joel Brown looks at this phenomenon.

MAIN PICTURE Real medicine or sugar pills? What does your mind tell you?

There is significant proof, that the mind can have a positive influence on mental functioning and quality of life

BELOW The placebo effect is well documented in medicine

material surroundings. A very famous actor did just that. He did not have much, but plenty of talent and faith, before experiencing a very successful acting career. He wrote himself a check for $10,000,000 and post-dated it for 10 years later, hoping he would be able to eventually cash it. That actor is Jim Carrey, one of the most famous comedic actors in the world!

Several high profile studies are showing that placebos handed out as anti-depressants basically do the same thing, minus the adverse side effects.

These findings are of course being downplayed by major pharmaceutical companies, who would lose out on billions of dollars of profit if antidepressants become less popular. On the other hand, this is very promising news for those who suffer from mental illness because it essentially shows the manner in which these conditions are occurring in our heads and are wholly reversible without the help of a concoction of harmful chemicals.

THE PLACEBO EFFECT IN SURGERY In 1939, an Italian surgeon named Davide Fieschi invented a new technique for treating angina. Three quarters of the patients showed improvement; one quarter of them was cured.

The surgical intervention became standard procedure for the treatment of angina for the next 20 years.

In 1959, a young cardiologist, Leonard Cobb, put the Fieschi procedure to the test. He operated on 17 patients: on eight of them he followed the standard procedure; on the other nine he performed only the tiny incisions, letting the patients believe that they’d had the real thing. Those who’d had the sham surgery did as well as those who’d had the Fieschi technique. This marked the beginning of the documented surgical placebo effect.

Perhaps the most impressive aspect of surgical placebo arose in a groundbreaking 2004 study. In the innovative field of stem-cell research, a new approach was taken with Parkinson’s disease.

Human embryonic dopamine neurons were implanted through tiny holes in the patients’ brains. Once again, the results were encouraging.

And once again, the procedure failed to do better than a placebo.

Extracted and adapted from Nexus Magazine website.

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Expect the BEST. Prepare for the worst. Capitalize on what comes

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ENJOY LIFE

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Laughter, humour, travel, love - these add the sparkle that make life worth living. Climb a mountain, give to others, start a family, embrace life... What are the things you wish you had done, but haven’t yet? Life is no rehearsal - find ways to enjoy it, whenever you can!

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THE USUAL SUSPECTS

Continuing with our Bucket List column, we look at those items that keep popping up

TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE

Author and tenacious survivor Mel Carnegie says your life belongs to no one but you

ENJOY LIFE

BUCKET LIST

THE USUAL SUSPECTS

W

e appreciate that everyone is different – one man’s junk is another man’s treasure and all that. That is why

①

preparing a bucket list is a very personal thing, and everyone’s is unique. While skydiving might be at the top of one person’s list, those of us who are slightly less thrill seeking will find the thought of jumping out

KISS IN THE RAIN

Clichéd as this scene may be in the films, getting kissed passionately in the rain is the most popular bucket list item. It ranks higher than visiting the pyramids of Giza or the Sistine Chapel. Luckily we live in a pretty wet climate, so achieving this one should be quite easy.

GET INSPIRED BY: Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams in The Notebook.

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of a plane to be a version of torture. However, we’ve done the research, and there are some activities that come up again and again. So if you need some inspiration for your list, keep reading.

②

Part of enjoying life is living for the moment, so don’t wait until you’re on your deathbed before you make a list of what you should’ve done.

Life is happening now, so start ticking things off that bucket list.

TAKE ME TO THE DRIVE-IN

What used to be the standard way of going to the movies has become a romantic novelty. Going to the drive-in has a certain vintage charm to it, which is probably why it’s the second most popular bucket list item.

But be sure to do it right – take a blanket and snuggle with your sweetheart.

GET INSPIRED BY: The Route 66 Drive-In Cinema in Manchester.

BUCKET LIST

③

IN TWO PLACES AT ONCE

⑤

FACE THE MUSIC

⑦

WHAT A LIFESAVER

Having one foot in the Northern Hemisphere and one foot in the Southern also rates pretty highly on the average bucket list. And as luck would have it, the countries along the Equator are beautiful too, so you can have a great holiday while ticking that off your list.

GET INSPIRED BY: Uganda Equator, gorgeousness where the hemispheres meet.

You may not be surprised that learning to play a musical instrument is a pretty popular choice. And even less surprising is that the most popular instrument people want to learn how to play is the guitar. This instrument is so versatile, it’s totally worth the finger callouses.

GET INSPIRED BY: the fact that there are loads of free videos and tutorials online.

In the same vein as giving blood, many people have rated learning CPR on their lists. This is a skill that really could save someone’s life and turn you into a hero.

They could name their kids after you, which would feel pretty good. Maybe not an entirely selfless act then…

GET INSPIRED BY: St. John’s Ambulance, which offers courses in CPR and first aid.

ENJOY LIFE

④

BLOOD IN, BLOOD OUT

⑥

IT’S IN INK

⑧

SOWING THE SEEDS

Ticking items off your bucket list doesn’t always have to be a selfish act. Sometimes all you need to do to feel better is to do something nice for someone else.

A great way to do this is by giving blood, especially if you have a rare blood type.

GET INSPIRED BY: Give Blood, which has blood centres all around England and North Wales.

We’re not talking about getting your arms covered in tattoo sleeves, but getting a small, meaningful tattoo is something that many people are planning on doing before they die. It could be a quote that helped you through a difficult time, or a replica of your child’s first drawing.

GET INSPIRED BY: the world around you. And if it’s a quote, triple check you have the right spelling.

As deforestation increases across the world, many of us enlightened ones have a need to do something about this. Trees are being cut down at a phenomenal rate, but if we all plant a tree, we can severely slow down deforestation, and maybe reverse it.

GET INSPIRED BY: The UN Billion Tree Campaign, which was inspired by Wangari Maathai.

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ENJOY LIFE MEL CARNEGIE

TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE If you often find yourself in situations where you feel helpless and resign yourself to that feeling, then Mel Carnegie suspects you’re missing out on a good deal of enjoyment.

I

’d like to explore the power of choice, and how the more conscious you are with your responses, the better you can handle situations, enjoy the process, and create a fulfilling life. Jack Canfield explains this with his formula for success: E + R = O (Events + Responses = Outcome). He says that when people don’t like the outcomes they are experiencing, more often than not they blame the event (E) for their lack of results (O). In other words, you can blame your partner, your boss, the economy, and any number of things when things aren’t going your way. That in itself won’t change a thing.

I know from experience how difficult it can be when things don’t turn out the way we expect. I didn’t expect to be orphaned, nor did I expect

to live with abusive guardians – and I certainly didn’t expect that my soulmate would turn out to be a sociopath! It’s easy for people to fall in to the trap of blaming what happens to them for the way they feel, and they soon feel frustrated and angry at the world. I have certainly fallen in to that trap myself.

I’ve found the key to the vast majority of situations is to understand what you can influence, no matter how small that may be. As soon as your focus shifts from what you can’t do to what you can do, that’s when the magic starts to happen.

So think about some of the things you can always control no matter what – simple things like your breathing, your tone of voice, the speed you walk. “Well, yes Mel, those

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MAIN PICTURE Feeling stressed and out of control? Make a change

ABOVE You are in charge of your own life

are obvious!” I hear you say. I agree, they’re obvious when you think about them, but how about the times when you feel out of control, or just generally dissatisfied with your lot? Do you automatically turn your focus on to what you are able to do in the given situation?

At DeNA Revolution, this is what we mean when we talk about ‘responding with rigid flexibility’, because your power lies in your choices of response in any given situation. It’s your responsibility (your ability to respond) that will lead you more quickly into a fulfilling life. Easier said than done? Well yes… then again, perhaps much easier than you might think.

Here’s something that might help. Remember Kitchener’s famous recruitment poster, pointing out with the caption “Your country needs

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you!” Good. So now think about something or somewhere in your life you’d like to improve: family, work, or relationships. Then imagine that situation is in front of you, and point your finger out towards it.

As you look at your hand, notice that while one finger is pointing out away from you (to the ‘event’ as Jack Canfield calls it) there are three fingers that are pointing back towards yourself. This is your clue.

This is how you can remind yourself to ask questions that will allow you to free up your options. Your three fingers can stand for three questions:  What would I like to change

about this situation?  How would I like to feel in this moment?  What can I do about it right now?

This allows you to access areas in your mind to start creating solutions for yourself – even if it’s just a tiny thing. Even if the only thing that you can affect is your breathing in the moment, as soon as you focus on that you’ll feel calmer and more resourceful. As you feel calmer and more resourceful your mind becomes freer and you can explore ideas that may not have been apparent before.

RECOMMENDED READING

ENJOY LIFE

Remember, it doesn’t matter what the situation is, you can always choose to focus on what you can do in the moment.

Then you can do something about it and even enjoy the ride.

If all else fails, have a go at this one. Pick up a pencil, put it between your teeth and hold it there – notice how that makes you smile? And so what happens when you smile… Ah yes, it immediately makes things brighter in your world. b

The Best You website is packed with loads of great books, DVDs, CDs, downloads, free articles and reports.

Check it out now: www.thebestyou.co

Beliefs

By Robert Dilts

Did You Spot the Gorilla?

By Richard Wiseman

The Magic of Thinking Big

By David Schwartz

l Pathways to health and

l How

l Set

well-being

to recognise hidden opportunities .

your goals high... then exceed them!

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Books support us in our solitude and keep us from being a burden to ourselves.� – Jeremy Collier

Great reading, viewing and listening to empower, entertain, enrich, delight and enhance. The Best You rounds up classics and new books and media products that will make such a positive difference in your life.

BOOK REVIEWS

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THE BUSINESS ALCHEMIST

BY PILAR GODINO

Are you an inspiring boss? Do you want to transform your leadership style? See how to increase your impact and influence within your business? Succeed in creating openness and the right chemistry in your daily interactions?

In this book, top leadership coach Pilar Godino shares her insights, real stories and tips gleaned from extensive experience working with top business professionals. She shows the pathway to the platform of authentic and inspiring leadership, the platform of the Business Alchemist.

Learn how to: • •

•

•

•

Strengthen your personal impact and influence Create an organizational structure and safe environment that people want to be part of Increase your awareness of your management style and daily interaction patterns so that you can achieve more with less Move into a space of true inspiration where you can become the leader you aspire to be Develop an efficient communication style and give feedback effectively.

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Pilar Godino is a remarkable leadership coach with a powerful and unique voice.

– Sarah Dorset

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MAKE YOUR OWN BUCKET LIST

BY ANDREW GALL

Sure, some people dream of seeing the pyramids, owning a Ferrari, and swimming with sharks, but that doesn’t mean you do. Make Your Own Bucket List isn’t just someone else’s list of exciting activities, interesting people, and wonders of the world. With this book, you will follow your own wildest passions, explore unforgettable destinations, and go on adventures you’ve never imagined—all on your own terms.

By answering the 111 entertaining prompts, you will come up with personalized options for where to visit, what to do, who to see, and, most important, what risky stunts to pull before you bite the big one. When you die might not be left up to you, but with Make Your Own Bucket List, what you do beforehand will be.

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BOOK REVIEWS

The purpose of the book is to have fun, and to get some insight about yourself.

In this, it succeeds in spades – Kevin

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BOOK REVIEWS

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GLOBAL CHALLENGE

BY HUMPHREY WALTERS

On 29 September 1996, 14 identical yachts left Southampton to participate in ‘The World’s Toughest Yacht Race’ – the BT Global Challenge – a 30,000 mile journey round the world the ‘wrong way’. After extensive training by Sir Chay Blyth’s Challenge Business, the crew volunteers, selected on the basis of enthusiasm rather than experience, were split randomly into 14 teams and were forced to make the best of the varying talents available. Racing against prevailing winds and currents, the crews faced an environment of extreme danger – violent weather conditions, equipment failure, complex tactical decisions, fatigue, and an evermounting daily workload.

This book provides a graphic description of the conditions that the yachts faced and the many elements that the crews had to cope with. The lessons learned on leadership and teamwork are drawn from this and compared with extensive research conducted at Princeton University and the London Business School, determining the behaviours necessary to produce outstanding performance when faced with a complex and dynamic environment.

Vivid illustrations of the use of High Performance Behaviours (HPB) make this an invaluable book, which provides definitive answers for leaders and teams in any organisation looking to improve personal and team performance.

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BOOK REVIEWS

The secret of running a team is to keep the six guys who hate your guts away from the seven who aren’t yet sure – Mike Brearley, OBE

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BOOK REVIEWS

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MY SIDE

BY DAVID BECKHAM This is David Beckham’s own story of his career, for Manchester United, Real Madrid and England, and of his childhood, family and private life. Featuring David’s first full account of a turbulent year in Spain, on and off the field, and England’s fortunes in Euro 2004.

This is Beckham’s fascinating life story in his own words. His rise through the ranks at the biggest club side in the world.

His complex relationship with United boss Alex Ferguson.

The England story, from being vilified by the nation before returning as the prodigal son to eventually captaining his country. His acrimonious falling-out with his manager and departure from Old Trafford in June 2003. And starting a new chapter of his life on foreign soil in the glare of the world’s press.

Now from Beckham himself, we gain a vivid and eye-opening insight into the family man behind the famous footballer, the international model and fashion leader. He describes how he first met and then married ex-Spice Girl Victoria Adams, and the upbringing of their children. How his family’s every step is monitored by a posse of newshounds and paparazzi. Also, the influence of his parents, growing up as a shy youngster in the family home, and how their subsequent split affected him.

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The confrontations between Beckham and Ferguson have the acid marks of authenticity – Mail on Sunday

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THE VIRGIN DIET

BY JJ VIRGIN

Based on her work with thousands of clients, including many athletes and Hollywood celebrities, JJ Virgin, a nationally recognized nutrition and fitness guru, has proven that many so-called “diet” foods can undermine your efforts to shed pounds and that supposedly healthy foods can actually cause you to gain weight. With just a 21-day commitment, the revolutionary Virgin Diet can reset your metabolism and end the seemingly endless yo-yo cycle of weight loss and gain forever.

The hidden cause of weight gain, Virgin explains, is Food Intolerance (FI). “Food-intolerance symptoms vary from person to person,” she writes, “but the most common include bloating, gas, indigestion, fatigue, mental fog, irritability, moodiness, and weight gain. If you’re eating foods that your body can’t tolerate, you’re likely to gain weight, feel crummy and look years older than you are.”

The big surprise for most of us, though, is that the seven major High-FI foods are: Gluten, Soy, Dairy, Eggs, Corn, Peanuts and Sugar and Artificial Sweeteners. In other words, many foods touted as “healthy” can be the culprits: egg-white omelettes, whey protein shakes, non-fat yogurt, and soybased veggie burgers on whole grain buns. Eating these foods can actually sabotage your health.

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BOOK REVIEWS

It’s funny to write a book review and to say that as a result of this information, I need new clothes! You’ll be saying the same – Dr. P

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THE BEST YOU

LIVE LOVE LEGACY

THE BEST

YOU

What do you want to be remembered for? What are your relationships like with those around you? How does life treat you - and how do you treat your life? There is so much good in you.

Enrich your life with the passion you feel and the connections you make.

Life Without Limits

TM

CALLING IT QUITS

With so many marriages ending in divorce, we look at how to deal with the aftermath

LAUGHING AT MY NIGHTMARE

Shane Burcaw tells us the truth about living with Spinal Muscular Atrophy

LIVE LOVE LEGACY THE BEST YOU THE BEST YOU

CALLING IT QUITS HIS STORY For me, divorcing was a sad occasion. Because of the lack of understanding, my parents disowned me and took the side of my wife. Eventually they understood why our relationship had broken down and accepted my decision to separate.

I decided that the best course of action was divorce because I found that our relationship had become one of friendship rather than marriage.

It was an amicable split.

Although we were separating, I still loved my wife and never wanted to hurt her. The children were the most important thing then, and still are now. My wife and I were adults and discussed everything as adults.

Divorce has it’s pros and cons, for example the pros are it stopped the unnecessary arguments in the family home in front of the children. It has enabled us to remain amicable and keep our focus on our two daughters. A major con was dividing the mortgage and bank accounts. It works out more expensive living separately than together.

I think many relationships end in divorce because the pressures of life and lack of communication all add to the breakdown of relationships. It is important to make time for your marriage and one another and discuss problems openly.

If you have children, it is important to keep them away from the process of divorce and maintain a healthy relationship for them, even if that is detrimental to future relationships. The children must come first.

According to a 2011 census in England and Wales, 42 per cent of marriages end in divorce. The Best You chats to people about their experiences, and asks a few experts for their advice.

ASK THE EXPERT JANET MURRAY: PERSONAL, RELATIONSHIP & DIVORCE COACH Divorce is one of those things in life that nobody expects, few of us have experienced before, and can have a devastating impact on our family, health, career, finances and self-esteem. Yet it’s something most of us battle through alone, relying only our lawyer and our friends & family to support us through.

Quite frankly, we seem to seek more support and guidance on holiday destinations than divorce: but a lousy holiday is a lot quicker to get over than a lousy divorce.

IS MY MARRIAGE REALLY OVER? If you are at the stage where you are contemplating separation or divorce, ask yourself these questions to check whether the relationship is truly over.  Is there any chance that your marriage can be saved? Can you honestly say that you have explored all the alternatives to separation or divorce? Have avenues such as relationship counseling or seeing a mediator to discuss your problems been

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considered?  Can the issues be worked through? Are there any alternatives to divorce?  Remembering that a relationship breakdown is never all one person’s fault, are you taking your responsibility for your share in the breakdown of the relationship, and if you aren’t is there anything you can address that might make a difference?

WHAT DO I NEED TO DO IF I’M GETTING A DIVORCE? Get organised: If you make the decision that divorce is the way

It’s something most of us battle through alone, relying only our lawyer and our friends & family to support us through

THE BEST YOU

Can you honestly say that you have explored all the alternatives to separation?

forward, it is essential to get yourself organised. Put a plan in place for dealing with the legal issues such as choosing a lawyer if appropriate, considering whether a conciliatory approach is possible, mediation, and so forth. When seeking legal advice, it is advisable to meet

MAIN PICTURE Turning your backs on each other is no way to solve the problem

up with a few lawyers to see which one feels like the best one for you- it is really important to ask yourself whether you can have a good working relationship with this person.

Get Support: Apart from the support of your family and friends, this might be the time to consider counselling. You might want to also seek the assistance of a divorce coach to guide you through the process.

This will help you to manage your stress and think clearly so you can make the right decisions, and help you with a co-parenting plan to minimise the impact of divorce on your children. It can also save money by avoiding costly mistakes, and finally look at how you can come out the other side post divorce and create and map out a happy future for you with the life and relationship that you really want.

Take Care of Yourself: Taking good care of yourself at this time is so important, and be aware that your body feeling exhausted through all the emotions that you are going through is a signal to tell you to slow down. This is a time where you may need to rest more, and allow your body to process the emotions it is feeling.

Remember, you are the most important person in this right now and when you are OK, that will have a positive effect on all those around you who you love and care for.

RECOMMENDED READING The Luck Factor

By Richard Wiseman l Scientific

study of the lucky mind

LIVE LOVE LEGACY HER STORY My ex-husband appeared to be perfect. He was charming and witty with his own business and a beautiful house. I moved in with him, but the charming veneer quickly wore off.

At one point I began to realise that it didn’t have to be this way and tried to leave. He broke down, begged me to stay and asked me to marry him. We launched into preparations for a big wedding and I felt convinced things would change. Two months before the wedding I returned from a holiday with my mother to receive a prenuptial agreement through the post. It stated that after a year I would get a small amount of money and a car. I should have cancelled the wedding but he talked me round and we went ahead.

I also worked for my exhusband, and six weeks after the wedding he sacked me for not wearing the company t-shirt and, in front of all of the staff. Shortly after that, my son and I moved out.

I fought my divorce as best as I could. My husband was worth several million but the pre-nuptial would have left me unable to put a roof over my son’s head. I came away with just enough to buy a small house and a car. My solicitor urged me to fight on but I just wanted him out my life. The lessons I had learned from my marriage made me strong enough to cope with anything life throws at me. b

The Best You website is packed with loads of great books, DVDs, CDs, downloads, free articles and reports.

Check it out now: www.thebestyou.co The Tao of Coaching

By Max Landsberg

The Power of SelfConfidence

By Brian Tracy l Become

l Boost

unstoppable, irresistible, and unafraid

your effectiveness at work

WWW.THEBESTYOUMAGAZINE.CO | 45

LIVE LOVE LEGACY SHANE BURCAW

LAUGHING AT MY NIGHTMARE Some people lead relatively pain-free lives, but manage to spend the vast majority of their time complaining.

Then there are people like Shane Burcaw, who, to be fair, has been handed a pretty raw deal, but lives life to the fullest and is an inspiration to everyone he meets.

Obviously, because of my disability, I need assistance.

But I have always tried to overcome the limitations of my condition and lead as full a life as possible. I have traveled the world, from the Antarctic to zero gravity.”

– Stephen Hawking

I

will most likely be dead before I turn 30.

Even that estimate is a generous one. I have a disease called Spinal Muscular Atrophy (Type 2) that has been slowly destroying all the muscles in my body for the last 18 years, 11 months, and 354 days. Eventually I will catch a cold, it will turn into pneumonia, and my body won’t be able to fight it off.

MAIN PICTURE Shane has overcome adversity and manages to find humour in life

RIGHT Shame relaxing with his family

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At least that’s what all my doctors subliminally imply every time they tell me I’m lucky to have stayed out of the hospital for almost a year now.

Look at that, you already know my deepest fear, the one that hits me like a train every single night when I’m trying to fall asleep; I don’t know how much longer I have to live. We’re practically dating.

To be honest, I’m not as upset about my circumstances as I maybe should be. Not that

being sad all the time would be the best way for me to live my life either, but I’m genuinely happy 99.9 per cent of the time, which gives me a slightly distorted view of reality that causes me to forget the fact that I am in a wheelchair and need to do mostly everything a little bit differently than everyone else. For instance, I love sleeping, it’s one of my favourite things, but about a year ago my stupid doctors ordered that I start using a bi-

SHANE BURCAW LIVE LOVE LEGACY pap to help me breathe while I sleep. My basic response after trying the machine for one night was “screw that, I’d rather die in my sleep than have to wear that every night” and I haven’t used it since. I’m probably being ignorant.

And yet, I don’t want to die – not today, not tomorrow, not ever. I love being alive. Besides doing some things differently, I pretty much live a normal life.

I have a great family and the coolest friends in the world, I go out and do things, like drink, (I only weigh 50lbs., so drinking gets interesting) go to concerts, hangout, pretty much anything a normal almost-19year-old does. I just finished my first year of college; I am study journalism and psychology at a local liberal arts college.

Living life from the seat of my powered wheelchair has allowed me to develop a pretty unique perspective on life, one that I hope to share with all of you via my website, http:// laughingatmynightmare.1000 notes.com. I hope at the very least that someone out there enjoys what I have to say. I can promise you this much; it will be real, it will be blunt, it will be sad, it will be funny, and it will be an adventure! b © Shane Burcaw 2013.

All Rights Reserved.

WHAT IS SPINAL MUSCULAR ATROPHY? Spinal muscular atrophy (SMA) is a genetic disease that causes muscle weakness and a progressive loss of movement.

There is no cure, but therapy and support are available to help manage the condition.

SMA causes the motor neurones in a certain area of the spinal cord to deteriorate. This results in progressive muscle wasting and loss of ability to move parts of the body.

MOTOR NEURONES Motor neurones are nerve cells that connect the brain and spinal cord to the body’s muscles. The motor neurones send out electrical signals to the muscles, which tell the muscles when to contract and relax. In people with SMA, the motor neurones deteriorate, causing the link between the brain and muscles to break down gradually. As the link between the brain, spinal cord and muscles breaks down, the muscles that are used for activities such as crawling, walking, sitting up and moving the head are used less and less and become weaker or shrink (atrophy).

TREATMENT AND SUPPORT The management of SMA currently focuses on the symptoms and providing supportive care. For example, breathing exercises and support can help to reduce the risk of chest infections, and a feeding tube may be needed for babies that are unable to swallow.

There are also several charities in the UK that can provide information and support, such as The SMA Trust and The Jennifer Trust.

WHERE TO FROM HERE? Since starting the Laughing at my Nightmare website two years ago, Shane Burcaw has done so much to raise awareness about his condition, Spinal Muscular Atrophy. Last month he put together and participated in the 2013 Bethlehem Laughing at My Nightmare 5k Run, Walk and Roll and 1 Mile Fun Run, proving you don’t have to have a pair of working legs to take part in a marathon. He has also recently been on a speaking tour educating the masses, as well as appearing on Katie Couric’s talk show. It’s his dream to be on the Ellen DeGeneres Show.

I don’t want to die – not today, not tomorrow, not ever. I love being alive

BELOW Shane and co being silly with Micky Mouse hats

HOW COMMON IS SMA? In the UK, it is estimated that there are between 5,500 and 6,000 people with SMA at any one time. This information was supplied by the NHS.

WWW.THEBESTYOUMAGAZINE.CO | 47

NLP TRAINING with RICHARD BANDLER Co-Creator of NLP

in London INTRODUCTION TO NLP

An evening with Richard Bandler 4th October 2013

LICENSED PRACTITIONER OF NLP 7th – 13th October 2013

LICENSED MASTER

PRACTITIONER OF NLP 5th – 13th October 2013

Book today on +44(0)207 927 6500 www.nlplifetraining.com info@nlplifetraining.com

THE BEST YOU

FEEL & LOOK GOOD

THE BEST

YOU

Feeling good about yourself makes the joy shine from your eyes and your skin. It makes others respond to you in new ways and it gives you a whole new outlook on life. Looking good draws others to you and enhances your life in ways you haven’t yet imagined. It’s great to find new ways to feel and look good now!

Life Without Limits

TM

LIKE A VIRGIN Kristen White chats to JJ Virgin about her diet that’s all about finding what’s right for you

IN THE SUMMERTIME Packing for your summer holidays?

Nicky Hambleton-Jones gives her expert advice on what to take along

IT’S THE GOOD NEWS So much of the news we read is bad.

Here are some stories to lift your spirits

FEEL & LOOK GOOD

KRISTEN WHITE

LIKE A VIRGIN You are eating all of the right things, but you can’t seem to lose weight. Kristen White speaks to fitness expert and bestselling author JJ Virgin, who reckons your “diet foods” may be to blame.

O

ne day we wake up and we start to feel less energetic, more bloated, perhaps even achy in our joints and sore in our gut. We assume this is what happens as we age. The extra few pounds we gain every year, well that’s just part of the protocol, too. Right?

You may be eating all of the right things – low fat yogurt, egg whites, orange juice, perhaps even tofu, but you are still having trouble shedding those few extra pounds.

In her ground-breaking book, The Virgin Diet: Why Food Intolerance is the Real Cause of Weight Gain, JJ Virgin reveals that food intolerance is the culprit triggering stubborn weight gain and a host of other nasty symptoms like breakouts, headaches and a bloated stomach.

“Food intolerance is an umbrella term,” says Virgin.

“That covers three other ways that foods impacts the body.”

However, there is not a set medical definition for this

category, which includes food sensitivities, true intolerance and food reactions. These are in addition to diagnosed deadly food allergies, for example, if someone is allergic, we have to remove the peanuts from the room. There are genetic issues with certain foods. For example, one in 133 people have undiagnosed Celiac disease, an allergy to wheat, or they are lactose intolerant. Some people have issues with sugar and insulin resistance. Fortunately, food allergies are rare, and many of us do not have a foodbased disease.

But, what about the rest of us? On one hand we feel fine after we eat, and on the other hand we realise we feel bad, but up to this point we have not been able to connect the dots between our depression, skin rashes and throat clearing. The answer may be in your kitchen.

“Your body is its own best test,” says Virgin.

How do you feel after you eat a certain food? It may not be immediate. For example, the egg white omelette with

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One in 133 people have Celiac disease, an allergy to wheat, or they are lactose intolerant.

cheese you ate on Monday may be causing you cramping and constipation on Thursday. “Most people don’t even realise what it feels like to truly feel good,” says Virgin.

The best way to learn is to eliminate seven key foods for three weeks and find out exactly what your body likes.

This is not a starvation diet.

You can’t just take things away.

That would make you hungry, anxiety-ridden and crabby.

KRISTEN WHITE

After 21 days, you will begin to notice that your mental fog has started to dissipate. You begin to see that perhaps certain foods were harmful to you, but the only way to find out is to remove them from your diet completely for a period of time.

Virgin says it’s important to not “cheat” during the 21 days.

Any amount of a food that you have a reaction too will trigger inflammation.

Virgin says she’s worked with doctors, celebrities and

clients for years and she began to see a pattern between certain foods and symptoms.

She also noticed, when the food was eliminated, the symptom would disappear, even if the symptom had been around for years.

“When you’ve been eating the same foods for your entire life,” Virgin says, “the best way to get started is to clean out you pantry. Remove the tempting foods from the house and replace them with alternatives. In the beginning

FEEL & LOOK GOOD

Remove the tempting foods from the house and replace them with alternatives there will be a period where you crave the old foods, but this is part of the process. In a strange twist, we are attracted to what our body has a reaction too.”

According to Virgin, this is a lifestyle shift. After the 21 days, you can start to add foods back into your diet, but go slowly and pay close attention to how they make you feel. This is a valid exploration for men and women, as they can both have issues with food. However, women also have the added challenge with hormone levels and stress. After, 21 days you will have a clear picture of how you can feel every day.

7 FOOD SUBSTITUTIONS Sugar/ Artificial Sweetners

Stevia

Eggs

Shakes (The Virgin Shake)

Dairy

Hummus/Guacamole

Gluten

Quinoa

Corn

Lentils

Peanuts

Almonds

Soy

Raw Foods

RECOMMENDED READING

The Best You website is packed with loads of great books, DVDs, CDs, downloads, free articles and reports.

Check it out now: www.thebestyou.co

Ramsay's Best Menus

By Gordon Ramsay

Nutrition Bible

By N.H. Jones s

Jamie's Dinners

By Jamie Oliver

l Every

l Shows

l This

recipe contains ingredients and a simply explained method

you how the foods you eat can make you look and feel younger.

book is all about making cooking inspiring and accessible.

WWW.THEBESTYOUMAGAZINE.CO | 51

FEEL & LOOK GOOD

NICKY HAMBLETON-JONES

Smart packing for a fantastic holiday with expert help from The Make-Over Queen, Nicky Hambleton-Jones

IN THE SUMMERTIME

E

ach year, many of us empty our entire summer wardrobe into our suitcases due to the excitement of getting away from work for a week or so for a much needed break. This can include the kaftan you never wear because it's not warm enough, or those really high strappy heels that you just can't walk in. However, we often only end up wearing a quarter of the clothes we have packed!

My top tip to avoiding excess luggage is a few

well-chosen, best-loved pieces that work well together. It’s no good taking items of clothing that you rarely wear at home, as these will just sit in your suitcase, creased and unloved.

Pack with your true self in mind and stick to a simple colour palette so you can mix-and-match items for a multitude of combinations.

The Holiday Hot List

A neutral pair of skinny jeans will be great for the journey, and if you opt for a pair with stretch, they’ll be comfortable for the whole journey. I love this light wash pair from Warehouse, £40. Remember to take a few pairs of sunglasses with you as well. One to look good, and one more practical pair.

GREAT HAIR DAY Swimming and sunshine wreak havoc with your hair, so it’s important to protect your hair as you do your skin. Invest in Kérastase Soleil Aqua-Seal Highly Protective Fluid-Cream, £15.12, a lightweight leave in spray, which will protect coloured hair from UVA/UVB rays, while providing water-resistant, anti-frizz and anti-humidity protection. This stops hair from becoming horribly dry, damaged and frizzy and instead keeps it supple, soft and swishy!

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LIPSTICKS AND LIP-GLOSSES These are useless on holiday as they are quickly washed off by sea or pool water. Instead, choose a gorgeous, long-lasting cherry crush lip and cheek stain by Stila, £16. This ingenious formula reacts to your pH levels giving you a personalised, natural-looking pout. Additionally, this clever, heavenly-smelling product, multi-tasks as a cheek stain to give you a gorgeous rosy glow.

NICKY HAMBLETON-JONES

BLOUSES UP OR DOWN Loose-fitting chiffon blouses are versatile as they can be dressed down in the day, worn on the beach as a great cover-up, or up-styled for the evening with an over-size clutch bag, towering wedges and sparkly dangly earrings.

Additionally, they can be worn with shorts, jeans and skirts to add kick to your style quota!

Check out Zara for a huge range of cute, ultra-feminine blouses, I love this bright pink one, £25.99 Ensure you choose a blouse for your body shape, and it will no doubt become your holiday go-to item.

The Bare Necessities A few multi-tasking hair and beauty products will ensure you look ever the golden, glowing goddess for the entirety of your holiday. There is no point in sticking to your usual foundation routine whilst on holiday.

Instead, opt for a gorgeous beauty balm (BB Cream) such as this one by Dior £30. A quick sweep of this cream will lift and brighten your skin, banish blemishes and protect your skin with SPF10 for a perfected complexion. Or, if you have a few small spots that have appeared overnight, lightly dab the balm on to the spotVs to instantly reduce redness and conceal them.

FEEL & LOOK GOOD

WHEN PACKING SWIMWEAR, OPT FOR BIKINI SEPARATES SO YOU CAN MIXAND-MATCH TOPS WITH BOTTOMS FOR A NEW LOOK EVERY DAY!

DID YOU KNOW ?

While it’s true that you should exfoliate before a spray tan, you shouldn’t do so before going in the sun for real. This removes the top layer of skin cells that protects you from the chemicals in sunscreen, salt, chlorine, sun, and various other elements your skin comes into contact with while on holiday.

Life is shorts A pair of black or beige shorts that you feel comfortable in are a must as they can be worn in the day with various tops, shirts or jackets, in different prints, patterns or colours. Pair with flat, strappy sandals in the day for a relaxed, yet stylish look. For evening, glam up the outfit with some bright heels for a sexy night owl look. I love this neutral pair from ASOS, £18.

For more information about Nicky Hambleton-Jones, her personal styling services and the Style in the City event please visit www.nhjstyle.com Follow Nicky on Twitter at @NICKYHJ and be privy to the latest NHJ STYLE updates via @NHJSTYLE

WWW.THEBESTYOUMAGAZINE.CO | 53

FEEL & LOOK GOOD

THE BEST YOU

THE GOOD NEWS

The news we read in the newspapers and see on the television is so negative that it can often feel like the media are conspiring to get you down in the dumps.

That’s why The Best You is bringing you snippets of good news.

WE NEED A HERO

T

he children's centre in Sao Paulo is using the superheroes like Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman to inspire their children to a better recovery – and Warner Bros have even joined in to help. That's what at the A C Camarge Cancer Centre, you will find branded chemotherapy dispensers carrying the Batman or Superman logos, as well as specially created comic books which show the Justice League of America working with a

Music to our brains

R

esearchers are beginning to find evidence that birdsong is good for you. While loud noises can be distracting, natural sounds can have the reverse effect.

Birdsong can make you mentally alert and physically relaxed, explains Julian Treasure, chairman of noise consultancy The Sound Agency.

"People find birdsong relaxing and reassuring because

over thousands of years they have learnt when the birds sing they are safe, it's when birds stop singing that people need to worry.”

A free smartphone app called Study claims to be a "productivity-boosting" soundscape that you can listen to at work. It covers background noise and Treasure is convinced that is aids focus, improves cognition and reduces tiredness.

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Superformula to combat cancer.

With chemotherapy being so draining, the exercise aims to bring hope to kids and inspire them to recovery. While the therapy itself is vital, it has long been noted that optimism and a feeling of hope can also play their parts in recovery from cancer.

"I think that many children are now going to understand how this treatment can give them a magic power, through this 'Superformula,'" Yelma Jacob, a nurse at the facility, said in a video posted by JWT.

THE BEST YOU

WEALTH & RICHES

THE BEST

YOU

Wealth [n] “happiness,” also “prosperity in abundance of possessions or riches” from Middle English “wele”, meaning “wellbeing”. Riches [n] “valued possessions, money, property,” Making money and bringing greater wealth to EVERY area of your life...

Life Without Limits

TM

FUN IN BUSINESS

Bernardo Moya chats to Roger Harrop about how what he learnt in the past helps him now

HOW TO BE A TOP… SALES EXEC Do you have the gift of the gab? Perhaps you can turn it into a profit

YOU ARE YOUR BRAND

Bernardo Moya chats to brand specialist Kubi Springer about building your brand

Follow Us online 56 | WWW.THEBESTYOUMAGAZINE.CO

THE BEST YOU

FUN IN BUSINESS

From building a nuclear power station to running a FTSE listed PLC listed by Forbes magazine as one of the top 100 overseas companies, Roger Harrop has done it all. So why did he get out, and what is he doing with all that experience now?

Bernardo Moya finds out.

MAIN PICTURE Roger reckons having fun in business is important

H

aving been at the very top of the executive tree, Roger Harrop has a bigger insight into business than most. For him life is all about learning and continuous personal development, so perhaps it's ironic that his formal school days leave him the least inspired. The grammar school he attended was "all about rules" and it was only when he went on to college and university to study engineering that he really came into his own – working half the year at university and the other half in the "real world" fitting steam turbines into power stations.

At the tender age of 29, under mentorship from his boss, he project managed building a power station in Kenya. "I had to go out and negotiate the project in the first place and then run the whole thing from beginning to end," he recalls. "I was sort of left to it."

This taught him a lot early

on, but life in business also had its knocks. Being made redundant after working to help structure an engineering business for new owners after a take-over was a shock.

But Roger bounced back to eventually become Chief Executive of British Tyre and Rubber (now Invensys), a multibillion pound company with a staff of a thousand beneath him.

It was then that he realised how limited the CEO's power really is. When a merger was on the cards, he found that his entire time was spent in trying to sell the company to the highest bidder rather than running the company.

"Suddenly it's all out of my control... other than just trying to sell it for the highest possible price. That's difficult!"

A few years after the takeover, Roger made a decision. He'd had enough of jet-setting and working in the corporate environment. "I promised myself two things: I wouldn't take any nonsense

WEALTH & RICHES

The grammar school he attended was "all about rules" and it was only when he went on to college and university that he really came into his own

from anyone anymore because I've had enough of that in the corporate world, and I'd try and enjoy every day."

Now Roger is a small business advisor, passing on his knowledge of business to his clients. He is also a public speaker at conferences who also gives daylong masterclasses.

Ever enthusiastic about business, he tells how his small business clients inspire him.

And despite his aversion to jetlag, he now travels all over the world giving talks in the Far and Middle East.

His enthusiasm for business remains as infectious as ever, as he smiles and says: "I'd like to think all over the world that I've just helped people be more successful in their business one way or another. If I've managed to do that then I'm a happy man."

There's one other thing he mentions, too: "That business should be fun," he smiles.

WATCH ROGER HARROP TALK TO BERNARDO MOYA IN THE BEST YOU INTERVIEW

WWW.THEBESTYOUMAGAZINE.CO | 57

WEALTH & RICHES THE BEST YOU

HOW TO BE A TOP SALES EXECUTIVE

The Best You asked four sales people at the top of their game, "what makes a great salesperson? We got some interesting and varied answers.

UMASHAN NAIDOO DESIGN CONSULTANT, MARKS & SPENCERS

RUSSELL WARD CEO, SILENT EDGE

Sales involves meeting a variety of different people and doing many different things. There is no daily grind, because no two days are the same. You can see the tangible consequences of your hard work, as you are directly responsible for important and vital business developments. There are a number of different sales roles that you can move in to, so you don’t have remain in one role. Sales is a skill set that you can transfer to any industry. Quality salespeople are in demand and there are huge opportunities for talented salespeople to distinguish themselves and advance quickly.

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Selling today has become more challenging.

Customers shop with information now compared with many moons ago when one relied on the sales person to schmoose and do the whole song and dance. In selling I always picture myself as the customer and how I would like to be served. Some golden rules are not to be too enthusiastic, do not come across as if you are more superior, make the customer feel like he or she is king, and indulge their questions by answering honestly. And if you don't know the answer, say you will get back after asking someone who does. It is key to firstly watch the customer browse and to pick up what they are looking at. This would give you an indication of price range and type of product they are looking at , then casually in a conversation manner approach. If they acknowledge you then, in a friendly manner, pursue the conversation.

Personal hygiene epically when engaging in a selling environment is key, so always make sure you have clean fingernails, clean hair, fresh face , clean breath and fresh body scent. With todays economy being so turbulent, any sale is key. Gone are the days of up selling. Just close the deal and build a reputation so that they will come back.

Everyone loves a deal, so as a sales person one should be aware of what the deals are. If you are allowed to discount at a certain amount, doing this as a gesture of goodwill will certainly bring back business! I always keep a record of people I have sold to and make a note of what they bought when, so when new items come in that may interest them I send off an email or make a call telling them about what's new.

THE BEST

YOU

BERNARDO MOYA Life Without Limits

CEO, THE BEST YOU

Make sure you are in the right state emotionally and that are you focused on the task ahead. If you are thinking about your personal problems, it will come across. The way you speak, your tonality, is even more important than the message. When speaking to people, build rapport. Understand who your customer is and what they are looking for. I always like commitment. Be clear on your approach and explain what you are offering and what you would like them to do, which is give you a straightforward yes or no. Do your research on who you are selling to. I think humour is very important. And learn how to deal with rejection.

STEVEN MAOUDIS CEO, THE MONTANA GROUP

There are many attributes that a person needs to become a top Flight Salesperson, but in my professional opinion the major factor that will help anyone embarking on this wonderful career without doubt is personal belief.

Belief is the sole ingredient that fires enthusiasm.

No matter what product or service is being sold the major factor that will propel any would be salesperson, and allow that person to reap the rewards of their hard earned efforts is belief. If you don't believe in your product or service 100 per cent, then that communication will be reflected in your communication to the prospective buyer. If you are looking at getting into the sales industry then you should become teachable, after all success leaves clues. With the internet it’s easy to learn everything you need. If you want to get into sales, make sure that you believe in the product or service you are getting into. If you don't really believe in what you are doing then my advice to you is start looking for another career. To finish off on this article I want to draw your attention to matching and mirroring. This is probably the most powerful way to build rapport, as rapport building is crucial when selling. When you go to see a potential customer, the first thing that you try to do is to subconsciously get the person to like you. We do this by trying to find something that we both have in common.

After all you wouldn't try to find something that you had in difference. People often make the mistake of searching for words within their vocabulary to try and impress the customer. Yet what we say only accounts for up to 10% of communication when trying to build rapport 60% plus is our body language www.stevenmaoudis.com

In the next issue we are chatting to Richard Bandler, the co-creator of NLP, and we get some notes from our deputy editor, who sees herself as an NLP newbie. We also have a look at the growing trend of early retirement and speak to some of the top entrepreneurs about what it takes to be a self-starter.

All this and so much more. Looking forward to it!

www.thebestyoumagazine.co

WEALTH & RICHES

THE BEST YOU

YOU ARE YOUR BRAND

I

n conversation with Kubi Springer, you get the feeling she'd have made a success of whatever she did. "I had a dream at the age of four of being a dancer," she tells me. "So I found myself when I was eight at the Royal Academy of Classical Ballet."

By the age of 14 she had an agent and by 17 had danced on tour with The Spice Girls.

After getting a knee injury at 17, she couldn't dance any more. Young and disillusioned she went to the USA to "go and visit family and see what happens", much to her parents' dismay.

It was a great decision.

Through chance meetings she found herself doing an internship at Essence Magazine.

At their annual music festival she met Puff Daddy, Jay-Z and a whole host of upcoming stars, as well as seeing what a big festival was like. She was bitten, went back to the UK to study the business side of the music industry .

When she finished her studies, she went straight back out to the USA to work "from the bottom up" at a marketing

Kubi Springer is the CEO and founder of the Kubi Springer Company – a brand management agency, and the producer and host of The Kubi Springer Show.

Bernardo Moya discovers what makes the Kubi Springer brand.

ABOVE Kubi Springer still maintains her dancers' grace

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agency.

Then, at a party in LA she saw Justin Timberlake sitting with his two choreographers.

She recalls: "I had a bigger mouth than I do now, and even more confidence... so I kind of walked up to Justin and I said, 'You don't know me, but I love your work' and turned to Eddie and Marty and said, 'You know, I used to be a dancer and I think you guys are great.'"

From the back of that conversation, she was offered the branding for the UK leg of Timberlake's tour. She was just 23.

It was a success. She continued handling the branding for Timberlake's

whole Justified European tour, as well as that of Mariah Carey, Eminem and others. She freely admits that running a major PR company at the tender age of 23 was something she wasn't yet ready for, so when Kanya King rang her and asked her to work in-house and do the marketing for MOBO, Kubi asked herself some hard questions. She decided to close the company at the age of 26 go over to MOBO. Here her branding skills found a new outlet. She handled sponsorship deals with L'Oreal, HMV and ATARI. She says: "I was 26, female, black and The Guardian had written quite a bit about me... all of

THE KUBI SPRINGER BRAND Vision and Determination - Kubi pursues her goal with all her heart. Flexibility - like changing direction after injuring her knee Novelty - she's willing to try new things Courage - she "feels the fear and does it anyway" Networking skills - she can "talk for England" Confidence - she gets herself noticed

a sudden I was a role model and found myself going out to universities, schools and colleges giving talks to young people."

At one talk a young man told her: "Oh, you need to meet my boss." The boss turned out to be Rio Ferdinand, who wanted her to work on a TV show. "It was a phenomenal experience," she smiles. "I met Beckham. Gorgeous! It's the highlight of my whole career."

Now Springer was branding with footballers. "One of the footballers would have a diamond encrusted Tiret's watch. Quarter of a million pound deal." She did that deal. "Blackberry was new to the market at the time, so we managed to get that in the hands of another footballer...

I did that!"

Her passion for branding is clear, and she hammers home the necessity for people to be clear about what they project about themselves.

"You need to understand that you’re a brand, just like a Coca-Cola or a Nike, or Rio, or a David Beckham. And you need to start to say, 'What does my brand stand for, what are my brand values? And what’s my Unique Selling Point? How do I go into this interview where they’ve already seen 100 people?’”

"What makes a good brand is first and foremost, having an emotional connection with your desired audience," she adds. "Only when you touch them at the core of them will you be able to trigger their psychology."

WATCH OUR VIDEOS NOW ON

WEALTH & RICHES

THE BEST YOU

ANDREW CARNEGIE

WANGARI MAATHAI

HARD GRAFT AND PHILANTHROPY

ENVIRONMENTALLY FRIENDLY

There is little success where there is little laughter.

We need to promote development that does not destroy our environment.

Andrew Carnegie was born in poverty in Scotland in 1835. His father William emigrated with the family to America when Andrew was 13, where his first job was in a linen mill for $1.20 for a six day week.

At age 15 he worked as a telegraph messenger boy in Pittsburgh, networking by memorising the names and faces of the wealthy people he met. He read continually to improve himself and through free access to the theatre came to appreciate Shakespeare. Advancing rapidly through the Pennsylvania Railroad Company, he learned vital managerial skills and was coached in investing by his boss. By the time of the American Civil War in 1860, Carnegie was Superintendent of Railways, ensuring communication lines were kept open. During this time he realised the importance of heavy industry.

Up to 1901 he built investments in petroleum, coal and steel, until he eventually sold his steel holdings to JP Morgan for $225,000,000, equivalent to $6 billion today. Carnegie argued that entrepreneurs should have two parts to life: amassing wealth, and distributing it to good causes. After 1901, he dedicated his life to philanthropy, founding libraries, museums and universities and giving endowments to promote peace.

His rags-to-riches story has inspired many others to make the most of their lives, whatever their poor beginnings.

After early schooling in Kenya, Wangari was chosen for the Kennedy Airlift, which arranged University education for 300 Kenyans in the USA. Here she was inspired by the environmental movement and returned to Kenya to become a lecturer, professor and activist.

Maathai was the first East African woman to obtain a PhD from the University of Nairobi. She founded the Green Belt Movement, which promoted tree planting as a means of beating poverty, deforestation and desertification, and she pushed for rights for women and for all Kenyans. As an active environmental and democracy activist she fought at every turn to curtail the power of corrupt government and its degradation of the environment. She faced the threat of assassination and was frequently arrested and assaulted by the police, while the Kenyan Government repeatedly used dirty tricks to keep her out of mainstream politics.

Nevertheless, she was finally elected as an MP in 2002 and was recognised for her lifelong struggle for justice, peace, democracy and environmentalism through the award of the Nobel Peace Prize in 2004.

She continued to work for the environment until her death from cancer in 2011.

 ANDREW CARNEGIE IS A LEGENDARY FIGURE WHO SHOWED THAT MOTIVATION AND PERSEVERANCE CAN FREE YOU TO BECOME WHOEVER YOU WANT TO BE. HIS INFLUENCE REMAINS WITH US FAR INTO THE 21ST CENTURY.

 WANGARI MAATHAI'S LIFE STORY READS LIKE A MOVIE, WITH VIOLENCE, SEXISM AND CORRUPTION THAT SHE OVERCAME AT EVERY TURN. MAATHAI'S EXAMPLE IS OF SOMEONE WHO ABSOLUTELY BELIEVES IN WHAT IS RIGHT, AND IS A HUMBLING EXAMPLE TO US ALL. – BERNARDO MOYA

– BERNARDO MOYA

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THE BEST YOU

WEALTH & RICHES

DALAI LAMA

STEPHANIE KWOLEK

PEACEFULLY RESISTANT

PERSEVERANCE AND TEAMWORK

Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.

All sorts of things can happen when you’re open to new ideas.

Tenzin Gyatso, Tibet's 14th Dalai Lama was recognised in 1937 at the age of two as the reincarnation of the 13th Dalai Lama, the spiritual and political leader of Tibet. He looked set for a life of mysterious obscurity on the Tibetan plateau as head of a mediaeval government until the People's Republic of China forced him to hand over sovereignty to China. The Chinese seizure of Tibet, along with the 1959 Tibetan Uprising, propelled the Dalai Lama from a local political figure to a worldwide spiritual presence. Since seeking political asylum in India, the Dalai Lama has spread the word of Tibetan Buddhism and has been massively influential in forming world opinion regarding Tibetan claims for autonomy.

As an advocate of non-violence, religious harmony and Human Rights he has received numerous awards, including the Nobel Peace Prize. As a reformer he has overseen the Tibetan Government-in-Exile's democratisation, ceding his claim to political power and focussing on his spiritual presence. Some may regard him as an anachronism in the 21st Century. Indeed, the Dalai Lama himself says that he may be the last of his line. Nevertheless, his humanity, his compassion and his efforts to create peace in the world make him a deeply inspirational person – and deeply enigmatic.

Born in 1923 in Pennsylvania, USA, Stephanie Kwolek had no intention of being a world-changing chemist. She wanted to be a doctor.

Without the funds to go to medical school after finishing her degree in chemistry in 1946, she took a "temporary" job with chemical giant DuPont.

Nylon had recently been discovered and Kwolek was tasked to discover more artificial fibres, a job she found so fascinating she stayed on.

Kwolek discovered a chemical solution with straight, rod-like molecules, but she had difficulties getting the solution in the fibre-making machine because the operator was convinced the machine would break.

It didn't break, and the resultant material, Kevlar, was ounce-for-ounce stronger than steel.

Kevlar changed the world, being used in skis, radial tires, brake pads, suspension bridge cables, helmets, and hiking and camping gear. Its most famous use, however, is in bulletproof vests; this use alone has saved untold lives.

With great modesty, Kwolek says her work was a team effort, but when asked about her approach to it, she gives a great insight into her mindset: "I discovered over the years that I seem to see things that other people did not see... if things don't work out I don't just throw them out, I struggle over them, to try and see if there's something there."

 THE DALAI LAMA IS DESCRIBED AS DEEPLY CHARISMATIC BY ALL WHO MEET HIM, AND HIS OPINIONS ARE RESPECTED

BY MORE FOLLOWERS AROUND THE WORLD THAN WOULD EVER HAVE BEEN THE CASE HAD CHINA NOT SOUGHT TO CONTROL TIBET. THIS IS ONE OF THE GREAT IRONIES OF HIS LIFE. – BERNARDO MOYA

 IN A WORLD THAT WAS AT THE TIME DOMINATED BY MALE SCIENTISTS, STEPHANIE KWOLEK'S INVENTION OF KEVLAR IS ALL THE MORE REMARKABLE. STEADINESS, FRESH THINKING AND LOVE OF HER WORK ARE THE KEYS TO HER ACHIEVEMENT – BERNARDO MOYA

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TIPS

ANGELA STEEL

REAL ENERGY DRINKS

ENERGY GIVING FOODS

Avoid sugary or starchy foods, which give you a short-lived spike of energy and are inevitably followed by a ‘crash’. Typical culprits are chocolate bars, muffins or chips but beware of those that are marketed as ‘healthy’ like many cereals, cereal bars or ‘low fat’ crisps. A good breakfast is the best way to switch on the metabolic ‘ignition key’ and prime the cells to produce even energy throughout the day. A couple of eggs with a slice of wholemeal or a big bowl of porriadge are perfect. Good amounts of lean protein (found in lean meats, fish, eggs, beans and lentils) with each meal are important too.

Good hydration is absolutely vital for our energy levels, keeping all the nutrients and chemicals flowing to where they need to be. Our body is ideally made up of 70 per cent water (one big puddle!) and to maintain this level, you need to drink at least 1.5 litres of pure water daily, and eat good amounts of watercontaining fruits and vegetables each day. Some drinks actually dehydrate you, such as tea, coffee and soft drinks. These same drinks rob you of energy by causing blood sugar highs and lows, the worst of all being ‘fizzy’ soft drinks and so called ‘energy drinks’. Unless you’re running a marathon, stay away from those!

GET ENERGISED

RESTORATIVE SLEEP

You need to recharge your batteries regularly and thoroughly. This means getting the amount of sleep you need (most people need at least 7 hours) and making sure it’s good quality sleep (by avoiding too much caffeine, or exposure to electronic equipment in the bedroom). The earlier you go to bed (around 10pm is ideal) the more you allow all the necessary healing and repair cycles to take place during the night. Imagine rebooting a very complex computer and allowing it to properly run through all of its scripts: recharging nerve energy, detoxifying, strengthening the immune system, improving memory, reinforcing protection against stress, and more.

Energy is a precious resource, which underpins everything we do. It can mean the difference between sailing through the day with ease, or struggling to get anything done.

Nutritional therapist Angela Steel gives us some tips on keeping those energy levels up.

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PRODUCTIVE TIME

Regular exercise is a well-documented cure for tiredness, even though it might seem counter-intuitive to go out for a run when all you want to do is go back to bed. Aim for at least two and a half hours of moderate intensity activity per week, like brisk walking, running or swimming, and try to break it down into daily chunks.

Exercise enhances the blood flow carrying oxygen and nutrients to muscle tissue cells, improving their ability to produce more energy. It’s good to include a ‘resistance exercise’ routine like weights as well as cardiovascular workouts, as building muscle tissue increases the number of energy producing cells in the body.

THE BEST YOU

21ST CENTURY LIVING

THE BEST

YOU

The pace of change can sometimes bewilder, but also gives amazing opportunities to meet new people, discover new things and thrive.

Bring out the best in you by discovering the latest innovations that will put you ahead of the pack.

Life Without Limits

TM

THE FAT CATS AND THE LITTLE GUYS App developer Rahul Gulati tells us all about acqhiring in the world of technology

LOST IN TRANSLATION J okes in text form can be easy to misinterpret. We look at this new-age inconvenience

21ST CENTURY LIVING

RAHUL GULATI

THE FAT CATS & THE LITTLE GUYS BELOW Google bought YouTube in 2006 for $1.65 billion

There seems to be a recent trend of internet giants like Google and Yahoo! buying up smaller companies like Android and Tumblr. Us non-techie people thought that was something worth looking into, so we got app expert, Rahul Gulati, to do some digging.

I

t is hard to find an aspect of our daily lives that is not touched by internet companies like Google, Facebook, Twitter, Yahoo! or Amazon. These companies took birth in dorm rooms, started out as research projects, were outcomes of brainstorming sessions or a bunch of friends wanting to build something they could use.

There is one such New York City based company called Tumblr – a microblogging platform that hosts over 108 million blogs. It was recently acquired by Yahoo! for a little

over a billion dollars. You must be wondering, why would a company like Yahoo! pay such a staggering sum of money for a microblogging platform? Well, there is more to it than meets the eye. Bijan Sabet, one of Tumblr’s earliest investors put it at Forbes, “Tumblr is strong in places where Yahoo! is not – it has a big audience in a younger demographic, it has verticals in travel, TV, and fashion, and its mobile platform is more advanced than Yahoo’s.”

Startups get acquired for various reasons. Here are a few of them:

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MARKET ENTRY When a big company plans to venture into a new market and wants to establish a foothold, like Google did by acquiring a relatively little-known company called Android in 2005 to enter the smartphone operating systems business.

VALUE ADDITION

MAIN PICTURE Big bosses are constantly looking to the little guys for good investments

It could be an important feature or a service that a company wants to build into its existing product offering.

Apple acquired Siri in 2010 when it wanted to integrate an interactive voice-based

RAHUL GULATI personal assistant in the iPhones. So far Apple has been successful in leveraging Siri’s technology to build a better product.

WIDER AUDIENCE WhatsApp is a very popular instant messaging app on mobile phones with more than 200 million monthly active users. It is rumoured to be in acquisition talks with Google.

If Google is successful in doing so, it will be able to reach users on iPhones, BlackBerry and Windows devices, where WhatsApp is highly used.

STRATEGIC REASON In March 2013, Amazon bought GoodReads.com, an online platform where avid book readers like to hangout.

For a company like Amazon, it makes a lot of sense as it can convert these book lovers into paying customers by selling them books through its online store.

REVENUE POTENTIAL There are companies that initially bear losses but could prove to be profitable in the long run. Some analysts say that YouTube, now a profitable venture contributes around $3 billion to Google’s annual revenue stream. In 2006, YouTube was paid $1.65 billion by Google and started generating profits only years later.

ACQUIHIRE Shortage of resources, especially great engineers and designers, is a persistent

21ST CENTURY LIVING

problem that a lot of tech companies are facing today.

To overcome this talent crunch, a lot of the time, big companies acquire startups primarily to hire its talented employees, resulting in the clever portmanteau. Last year Facebook acquihired Spool for its “deep expertise in mobile software development.”

DATA There are companies like Instagram, which are picked up for its ‘rich’ data that can be used to deliver a better user experience. Robert Scoble, a popular blogger and technical evangelist, said on Quora, “It [Instagram] knows who you like seeing photos from. That gets Facebook a dramatically better photo ”graph”. That keeps it ahead of Google+, which wooed photographers strongly in its first seven months on the market.”

But there have been instances where things didn’t turn out well for both the acquired and the acquiring company. This typically happens when the acquired company loses the decision making power for its product or when the large company is unable to realign its business interests and manage expectations. In February this year, Twitter decided to shutdown Posterous, a popular blogging platform to “focus 100 per cent of their efforts on Twitter.” Google is also known for its annual ‘spring cleaning’, where it has discontinued

RECOMMENDED READING

In February this year, Twitter decided to shut-down Posterous, a popular blogging platform to “focus 100 per cent of their efforts on Twitter

services like Google Reader.

Apart from making a great deal of money for its founders, early stage employees and investors, freshly acquired start-ups can reach a far greater audience through the big company’s existing infrastructure. Acquisitions are also a form of market validation of the start-up’s business idea.

Usually, founders use the money to start another venture, continue to be employed at the big company or become investors or advisors to other upcoming companies.

Overall for the tech industry, start-ups acquisition is a healthy trend and a strong indicator of growth. It leads to consolidation in the market and promotes competition between large companies, which can strategically place themselves against each other. A steady stream of innovative and disruptive companies is always a great sign for any industry. For users, it is great situation to be in as they continue to receive the best of services, apps, and online tools.

The Best You website is packed with loads of great books, DVDs, CDs, downloads, free articles and reports.

Check it out now: www.thebestyou.co

I is for Influence

By Rob Yeung

A Deep Breath of Life

By Alan Cohen

Ask Your Guides

By Sonia Choquette

 The

 A

 A

New Science of Persuasion

spiritual guidebook that offers pause for thought

fascinating and inspirational book

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21ST CENTURY LIVING

THE BEST YOU

LOST IN TRANSLATION Family feuds have started because of an ill-advised comment via email, and jobs have been put under threat for a misunderstood tweet.

Conveying tone in text is hard and a real problem of the 21st century.

The Best You investigates.

THE BEST YOU

B

ut it was meant as a joke!” How often have we uttered these words to friends and family members who have not bothered to take the required pinch of salt with certain comments? When you consider how the characters interact with each other in Jane Austen novels, with all those “how do you dos” and “pleased to make your acquaintances”, it certainly feels like we are getting ruder as a species.

With our interactions becoming more and more blunt, it’s no wonder we misinterpret each other. And that’s using speech where we can use tone to convey what we mean. Throw text messages, emails and tweets into the mix – where tone is totally left up to the interpretation of the reader – and the doors for misunderstanding are thrown open.

John works for a large company spread across two floors of a London office as well as branches in other parts of the world. When his cafetiere went missing from the kitchenette, he sent out a humorous email to his colleagues requesting that his cafetiere be returned as his grandmother had smuggled it under her skirts from Malaysia when she escaped the slave merchants. Had this email gone out to John’s close colleagues who were wise to his bizarre sense of humour, it probably would have been fine. However,

21ST CENTURY LIVING

RIGHT We live in a digital age, but that doesn’t mean we’re good at it

Leigh and Emily, dubbed Twitter Terrorists got into trouble because of a simple tweet

what John didn’t realise was that he had included the entire company in the email, including the offices abroad. He was swiftly summoned down to Human Resources and told to watch his step.

John’s story is an example of two faux pas so often made in this century – making jokes in a medium where it is impossible to convey tone, and sending emails to people who were not meant to be included.

For people with a natural sense of humour, reining it in can be quite a challenge. But, in a corporate environment, it’s probably best to leave your wackiness at the door.

And it’s not only your career that you have to worry about.

Julian’s relationship nearly fell apart because of Facebook messages being misinterpreted.

He was in a relationship with Mary, who introduced him to one of her best friends. Julian and the friend had similar taste in music and movies, and once they befriended each other on Facebook, they started to recommend songs and films to each other.

Mary interpreted this as flirtation, which caused some relationship problems. Julian insisted that his conversations with Mary’s friend were entirely innocent, but because of Mary’s insecurities, she projected

her doubts and lack of trust in Julian onto this situation.

Channel 4 screened a documentary film earlier this year called Don’t Blame Facebook, and it highlighted some of the most catastrophic examples of the text medium being misinterpreted. Leigh and Emily, dubbed Twitter Terrorists by the documentary, got into trouble because of a simple tweet. Before departing from the UK for their Hollywood holiday, Leigh tweeted: “free this week for a quick gossip / prep before I go and destroy America?” To those belonging to a certain demographic, “destroy America” clearly means partying hard, but United States intelligence officials are not in that demographic. Leigh and Emily were met at LAX Airport by the authorities, had their phones searched and were deported back to the UK without their holiday or any reimbursement on their airfare, hotels or visas.

These are extreme examples of what can happen when texts, emails and social media are misinterpreted. Most of the time you can explain your way out of it, but it’s good to be careful. Always read your messages carefully before you hit send and make sure it can’t be interpreted in any way apart from what you mean. b

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WE SUPPORT

The SMA Trust

S

pinal Muscular Atrophy is a muscle wasting disease that affects thousands of people in the UK, of all ages, races and backgrounds.

SMA affects motor neurons in the spinal cord. This results in weakness, leading to severe disability and the possibility of premature death. More babies die from Type 1 SMA than any other genetic condition in the UK today.

The SMA Trust was founded in 2003 and are working to fund medical research into Spinal Muscular Atrophy.

Their core research work has grown, as has the success of our international work. Most importantly, they are very proud of the leadership they have taken to lay the groundwork for clinical trials, both in the UK and internationally.

The genetic origins of SMA remained a mystery until 1995 when the missing gene in those afflicted with SMA was first identified. That gene is essential for the survival of motor neurons which are vital for the functioning of muscles.

Since then research into SMA has attracted a growing body of

The SMA Trust’s objective is to be active and progressive in the search for a cure for Spinal Muscular Atrophy. The SMA Trust is involved with numerous research projects in the UK, on the Continent and the USA.

top scientists.

“SMA is a curable disease.

It is a question of how to deliver the right therapy to the right place at the right time. Researchers are on the threshold of clinical trials of Molecular therapy. While it will not be without some problems, in 10 years’ time I feel confident that patients with SMA will be treated with therapies that have a real chance of preventing muscle weakness if given early, or at least slowing deterioration.”

– Kevin Talbot, Professor of Motor Neuron Biology, University of Oxford They need your help at this exciting time as they rely entirely on private contributions to fund the vital research into finding a cure for SMA. Any donation, however big or small, will make a difference.

Look at their website to see what you can do to help. Or text SMAT01 to 70070 to donate £5.

OTHER WORTHY CAUSES WE SUPPORT Katie Piper Foundation

10 million metres

War Child

www.katiepiperfoundation.org.uk

www.alexflynn.co.uk

www.warchild.org.uk

Teenage Cancer Trust

Sebastian's Action Trust

Children Of The Night

www.teenagecancertrust.org

www.sebastiansactiontrust.org

www.childrenofthenight.org

Johnson Beharry VC

Bosom Buddies UK

The Children’s Trust

www.johnsonbeharryvc.com

www.bosombuddiesuk.com

www.thechildrenstrust.org.uk

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