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THE BEST
YOU
Life Without Limits
KANYA KING THE WOMAN BEHIND THE MOBOS MODERN FAMILIES
WORLD WONDERS
THE FAMILY UNIT IS GOING THROUGH CHANGES
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JUNE 2013
CONTENTS REGULARS 5 EDITOR’S LETTER
Bernardo Moya welcomes you to the latest issue of The Best You
29 BOOK REVIEWS We give you our top literary choices – a small selection of what’s available
64 TOP TIPS: OFFICE WELLBEING Mike Clayton gives us tips on feeling good in the workplace
8 THE MOJO BEHIND THE MOBOS WE CHAT TO KANYA KING, FOUNDER OF THE MOBO AWARDS, ABOUT HER SUCCESS AGAINST ALL ODDS
FEATURES 8 THE MOJO BEHIND THE MOBOS
We chat to Kanya King, founder of the MOBO awards
12 MICHAEL’S REVOLUTION
Bernardo Moya chats to author and all-round inspiration, Michael Neill
INNER YOU
16 SHE’S STILL STANDING
We get to know a bit more about Mel Carnegie, author and future contributor
18 BEYOND THE FEAR
Gillian Jones tells us how we can get over the fear and become more confident
ENJOY LIFE 22 IT’S A WONDERFUL WORLD
22 IT’S A WONDERFUL WORLD
Working on that bucket list? Here are eight places you need to see
24 A RAW DEAL
Raw food is all the rage in Hollywood. We give you the lowdown
WE LOOK AT THE WONDERS OF THE WORLD PLUS ONE EXTRA TO ADD TO YOUR BUCKET LIST
THE BEST YOU No. 8 · June 2013 · Year 1 · EDITOR / PUBLISHER Bernardo Moya · DEPUTY EDITOR Zoë Henry · ASSOCIATE EDITOR Matthew Wingett · GRAPHIC DESIGN · Joanna Frackiewicz · NEW MEDIA · Allan Banford · TECHNICAL CONSULTANT Martin Carter · ADVERTISING · Carla Phipps carla.phipps@thebestyou.co · The Best You Corporation LTD 5 Percy St. · London, United Kingdom, W1T 1DG · Tel: +44 (0)845 230 2033 · www.the best you. co
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JUNE 2013
CONTENTS
LIVE LOVE LEGACY
42 A WOMAN OF MANY FACETS
Kristen White, host of The Ripple Effect, chats to us about life, love and having fun
44 MODERN FAMILIES Families nowadays are a far cry from the nuclear family of the 1950s
46 DEALING WITH JEALOUSY
Are you green with envy? Therese Borchard gives us some tips on getting over it
FEEL & LOOK GOOD 50 IT’S THE GOOD NEWS
So much of the news we read is bad. Here are some stories to lift your spirits
46 DEALING WITH JEALOUSY ARE YOU GREEN WITH ENVY? THERESE BORCHARD GIVES US SOME TIPS ON GETTING OVER IT
52 OLD WIVES TALES
We look at four health myths you won’t believe aren’t facts
54 RACE REPORT
Last month the annual marathon took over the London streets. We look at how it has changed over the years
WEALTH & RICHES 56 SHIFTS IN THE WORKPLACE
Author and business expert Liz Barclay tells us how the workplace is changing
58 HOW TO BE A TOP…TV PRESENTER
Interested in taking up a career in television? Four top presenters tell you what it takes
60 A TICKING CLOCK ON THE PENSIONS TIME BOMB
Have you started saving for your retirement yet? Better hop to it
62 THE ROCKY ROAD TO SUCCESS
The Best You looks at some inspirational people from history who didn’t have success handed to them on a silver platter
21 CENTURY LIVING ST
56 SHIFTS IN THE WORKPLACE AUTHOR AND BUSINESS EXPERT LIZ BARCLAY TELLS US HOW THE WORKPLACE IS CHANGING
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66 THINGS ARE LOOKING APP
App enthusiast Rahul Gulati gives us the goodies in the world of mobile apps
68 COOKING WITH GAS
Being environmentally friendly is a big part of 21st Century Living, and this month The Best You gives you some tips on saving gas
THE BEST YOU
EDITORIAL
EDITORIAL
ARE YOU MAKING A DIFFERENCE?
G
ood day to you wherever you are in the world! Here we have our latest, bright and shiny issue of The Best You. This last month has been a fabulous time for me in which I saw many projects coming to fruition. One of them was the Masterclass Series of seminars. These were two fabulous days in which two masters of Personal Development gave of their knowledge and wisdom to small, select groups. Hypnotist and self-help expert Paul McKenna was the first to spend a day giving people insights into excellence and getting the best from themselves, and then Dr Richard Bandler took another Masterclass seminar, teaching his students how to be even better at what they do. It was fascinating. When I think about all the different things our group of companies do - it makes me proud, because I really believe
we are making a difference. Our seminars have given me the opportunity to promote the best, and have also enabled me to give free places to deserving causes so that anyone can transform their lives. This magazine is also part of that drive to spread some useful, transformational ideas to everyone – free of charge. It’s a place where everyone can find something – a word, a thought… because sometimes that’s all it takes to make an amazing change. My question to you, is what are you doing to make a change? What are you here in this world to do? We can all help each other in more or less measure. You don’t need to be famous, or own a company, be a millionaire or be an inspirational speaker. We can all help one person at a time.. one word at a time. Leo Buscaglia said “Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest
You’re not here to make a living; you’re here to make a difference
compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around” So how are you going to make the world a better place?
Andrew Matthews
BERNARDO MOYA, Editor
Follow me: @Bernardo_Moya
WE WANT YOUR STORIES The Best You is all about inspiring people. If you have a tale to tell that you think will help someone become the best they can be, please tell us.
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TAKE ON A CHALLENGE FOR TEENAGE CANCER TRUST RUN
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London Triathlon
Great London Swim
27 – 28 July 2013
31 August 2013
Royal Parks Half Marathon Sun 6th October 2013 1 Dec 2013
FACE YOUR FEARS
CYCLE
Take the leap and experience an exhilarating 10,000ft free fall
Moonriders: London to Cambridge
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10-11 May 2013
London to Brighton 12-13 July 2013
Halloween 25-26 October 2013 60 miles overnight, arriving in time for sunrise and breakfast!
Multiple dates & locations available Sat 4 and Sun 5 May 2013
THE BEST YOU CONTRIBUTORS
GILLIAN JONES
LIZ BARCLAY
MIKE CLAYTON
is the founder of Emerge Development Consultancy and co-Managing Director. Gillian has worked with numerous organisations during the past 17 years, helping them realize their true potential. She has co-authored 50 Top Tools for Coaching and co-written a book on Coaching Culture Strategy to be published in 2013. @EmergeUK
as had a portfolio career for 20 years working as a consumer and small business journalist and broadcaster while coaching people in communication skills, advising small businesses on employee engagement and customer care, and serving on several company and charity boards. @LizBarclay
has been a successful project manager and management consultant, before changing career and becoming a successful coach and trainer, founding two training businesses. Now in his third career as a speaker and author, Mike has got more done than most, yet said NO to more things than he has said yes to.
RAHUL GULATI
SOPHIA HUSBANDS
THERESE J. BORCHARD
is a technology enthusiast and has been working with start-ups in the Mobile Internet sector for over three years. He is hooked on to smartphone apps and tweets frequently. You can read his blog here: http://RahulGulati.in @RahulGulati
is a lifestyle writer who likes to educate and entertain through her blog, www.sophiaworld. co.uk. She started her career working in corporate finance for famous multinational brands, such as Shell, before becoming a trainer. She is currently writing two book series: the Naked Series and the Love Series @sophiaworld
@MikeClayton01
is the author of Beyond Blue, Making the Most of Bad Genes and The Pocket Therapist. She writes “Sanity Break” on Everyday Health, is Associate Editor and a frequent contributor to Psych Central, and is the Depression Expert for Answers.com. @thereseborchard
A SPECIAL THANKS TO LINA CAMERON FOR KANYA KING’S MAKE-UP AND MATT TAYLOR THE COVER PHOTO. THE BEST YOU IS PUBLISHED BY THE BEST YOU CORPORATION LTD, 5 PERCY STREET, W1T 1DG. OPINIONS EXPRESSED DO NOT NECESSARILY REFLECT THE BEST GROUP INTERNATIONAL POLICY. THE BEST GROUP INTERNATIONAL ACCEPTS NO RESPONSIBILITY FOR VIEWS EXPRESSED BY ITS CONTRIBUTORS. ADVERTISEMENTS AND READER OFFERS ARE NOT ENDORSED BY THE BEST YOU OR THE BEST GROUP INTERNATIONAL.
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THE MOJO BEHIND THE MOBOS A pioneer in the urban music industry
KANYA KING
founder of the Music of Black Origins Awards, has quite a story to tell. Bernardo Moya gets her to tell it to us.
E
ffortlessly stylish with an air of old school charm, Kanya King breezes into the studio and settles down for our interview. But life hasn’t always been this glamorous for Kanya. “I come from a large family. I’m one of nine children, and I’m the youngest girl. In fact, ‘Kanya’ means the youngest one”, says Kanya. “My family definitely faced discrimination. My parents came here at the age of 18 roughly to pursue their goals, and they came here at a time when there were a lot of jokes about the Irish and you’d have notices and boards that said ‘No Irish, No Blacks, No Dogs’, so you can imagine. And my mother being from Ireland, my father being Ghanaian with a strong African accent, people would make fun. Discrimination was rife at that particular time in the ‘60s. I think sometimes my mum would try to find somewhere for us to live, and she’d have to persuade the landlord to rent a flat to us, then when my father came home from work, they’d kick us out. I suppose being a strong Irish woman, my mother had to get on with it really. She had to provide a roof over our heads so it was hard.”
Despite these hardships, her father had faith that Kanya would be become a success in this society. He told her something that really resonates with the whole theme of this publication – he said to her “be the best you can be”. This spurred her on to make something of her life. A natural innovator, Kanya looked for a gap in the market – something that was in tune with her passions, and she stopped at nothing to make it happen. “Growing up in a family loving music, listening to different genres, and having a lot of friends that were phenomenal musicians”, Kanya remembers. “But there was nothing that they could aspire to, so they’d always look to America.” This is where the idea of the MOBOs germinated. “To be honest the MOBO Awards is not something that I set up to do. I wanted someone else to do it. I was hoping someone else would put on a show where the kind of music I was into was featured – Hip-Hop, R&B, Reggae. This was what young people were listening to, and there was no vehicle or platform where young people could aspire to be on. We have phenomenal talent here in the UK, and so I started putting on gigs in my spare time. From
BELOW LEFT Kanya with Duncan Bannatyne BELOW MIDDLE Rihanna attending the MOBOs BELOW RIGHT Kanya on the red carpet with Alesha Dixon
no money, because I had no money to market it, just pure word of mouth, which is obviously the strongest form of marketing. And it’s low cost.” Looking at what the MOBOs has become, it is difficult to believe that it wasn’t smoothsailing from the start. When Kanya came up with the idea for the MOBOs, Brit Pop was in its prime, and not much attention was being given to urban music in the UK. However, Kanya isn’t one to give up on her dreams, and she fought through, and like the resourceful woman that she is, she made a plan. “I thought to myself, if you believe in it so much, put your money where your mouth is”, Kanya says. “I was fortunate because I got on the property ladder from an early age. Coming from a large family, I couldn’t wait to move out, so I got on the housing ladder and then re-mortgaged my property.” When the MOBOs finally became a reality, with the first MOBO Awards ceremony
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FAR LEFT Kanya with X-factor judge Tulisa
LEFT Delilah attending the MOBO Awards
I come from a large family. I’m one of nine children, and I’m the youngest girl. In fact, ‘Kanya’ means the youngest one taking place in 1996, it was a landmark in the urban music industry. And pulling it off was an achievement against all odds. Not only did Kanya have to mortgage her property to fund it, but the entire event had to be put together within six weeks. If you know anything about event management – even if your only experience is putting together a children’s birthday party, then you know that it’s no mean feat. The MOBO Awards are associated with the crème de la crème of urban music, but how did Kanya get these big names involved in this start-up project? “They weren’t big at the time; they were unknown, so we were able to give them a platform,” she says.
In addition to all the great music talent at those first awards, where Lionel Richie won the well-deserved Lifetime Achievement Award, Since then the awards have gone from strength to strength. It has helped cement the careers of many young artists, from Rita Ora to Emeli Sandé, and Amy Winehouse, to name a few. The fact the Kanya has had the opportunity to help make these musicians’ dream a reality is something that she is very proud of. “We’ve been fortunate that we’ve seen incredible talent coming through”, Kanya says proudly. “An unknown Amy Winehouse performed for us. She had an incredible voice and just really mesmerised the
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BELOW This logo has become synonymous with success
industry. What people don’t realise is all the hard work and graft that artists like this put into trying to be a success in the music industry. When N-Dubz won best newcomer, they said to us they were on the verge of giving up. Their manager had died, they’d been dropped by their label, and then they got this platform and huge amount of support from us, and that changed everything for them.” Starting something like the MOBO Awards takes a very business minded person with an entrepreneurial drive. This is something that Kanya seems to have in abundance. She found a niche in the market
that doubled up as something she was passionate about, and she stopped at nothing to make it a reality. Kanya King is an inspiration as she is representative of a minority group – women in business, which sits at about 16 per cent in the UK. She has made something out of nothing, and the legacy she is creating is really something she should be proud of. She is also involved in several government schemes, such as initiatives for disadvantaged youth and the Home Office Task Force to reduce gun violence, a cause which is increasingly important in modern society. MOBO has meanwhile become the essential destination for music, the ultimate community digitally whilst still remaining the place that up and coming artists use as a stepping-stone. MOBO believe that any young person regardless of their background should have the opportunity to discover their creativity and fulfill their potential. Through providing the platform whether it be via MOBO.com, Acoustic sessions, MOBO UnSung talent support or tours, MOBO hope to help young people make the most of their lives through the power of music. All Kanya’s achievements have culminated in an event that would be the highlight of many people’s lives – she was presented with her MBE by Prince Charles at Buckingham
BELOW Kanya with R&B legend Diana Ross
BELOW Kanya King with Rita Ora
Palace. “It was so surprising! I’ve never even known anybody who received that honour before. I got sent this letter saying that the Prime Minister wishes to recommend you for the Queen’s birthday honours list. I thought someone was playing
a joke on me.” Shortly afterwards she was invited back to the Palace along with JK Rowling and Cherie Blair for lunch with the Queen. This event was to celebrate exceptional achievements by British women. This has been followed by a Fellowship, a few Doctorates and this year she was taken up in the top 100 list of most influential women in the UK (Radio 4 – Women’s Hour). Kanya has accomplished so much in her life, but there are no signs of her stopping, or even slowing down. With plans in motion to expand the MOBO Awards internationally, she speaks of the future with relish. “Now the MOBO Awards goes out to an audience of over 339 million people, it’s distributed to a huge audience and you know we’ve taken MOBO out to other territories around the world in more international events that we do. I just want to continue to innovate, hopefully – continue to pioneer and to continue to do things that we’re passionate about and help support the next... Emeli Sandé, the next Amy Winehouse.” b
I thought someone was playing a joke on me. KANYA KING AT A GLANCE Kanya is an assertive, soft and gutsy woman A woman who, from early years, had a very clear vision of who she wanted to be and what she wanted to achieve She is in touch with her roots and origins and has high moral values She believes that hard work and the right attitude is key She comes across as a woman who wont take no for an answer She has very clear ideas regarding entrepreneurship and business
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FEATURE
THE BEST YOU
MICHAEL NEILL’S
REVOLUTION Michael Neill is one of the world’s top life coaches, whose books sell worldwide and whose radio broadcasts are massively popular. Bernardo Moya interviews Michael Neill to find out how he came to be one of the most popular figures in the world of Personal Development – and what really makes people happy
M
ichael Neill’s likeable smile, his easy charm and wit shine at his trainings, book signings and on the radio. Confident in front of an audience, filled with a calm wisdom and playfulness, he also emanates sincerity when he works closely with people. Michael is the consummate coach with a brilliant insight into people. Yet it was far from obvious that he would become a change-worker when he was younger. His father was an engineer who helped design the legs for the lunar modules, his mother was an organic chemistry professor and his brother and sister went to MIT and Harvard respectively. In contrast, Michael wanted to be an actor, but the thing that brought him to the world of mind was his own struggle. “I grew up suicidally depressed from about the age of 13,” he remembers. “It got worse and worse... so I was forced to deal with psychology, which wasn’t part of my family’s make-up.” “I was incredibly loved,” he says, remembering his early years growing up near Boston, Massachusetts, and knowing this made him realise his depression wasn’t anything to do with his family, but came from within. It was a theme he would return to years later in his book The Inside Out Revolution. At school he found an escape in the theatre, where he “got to be someone else” and since acting was his natural talent, he
pursued it, eventually getting a scholarship and moving to London at the age of 20. It was not the most auspicious of starts, he recalls, since he landed just as the Great Storm of 1987 hit these shores. “I was in a little bedsit where you put the 50p piece in to get the electricity working and I saw this storm outside and I didn’t have a radio or anything. I thought it was the beginning of the British winter. I’m looking outside at this hurricane thinking ‘this is like October and it’s going to get bad in December! ...I’m not going to make it!’ I was probably the only person in London relieved when I found out it was a hurricane!” Michael became a professional actor in the UK, immersing himself in the British culture and learning what were universals among people, and what were just idiosyncracies of culture. Something of an
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ABOVE Michael now smiles at what the world has to offer
Anglophile, he loved The Clash, Black Adder, The Young Ones. “I was into British culture. I already drank tea!” he recalls. One day after living in the UK for 5 years he received a letter that really made him think. “It was a vaguely familiar handwriting and I opened it and it said, ‘Dear Michael, you’re probably living in London, you’re probably married (which I was), you probably don’t have kids yet, you’re probably doing a lot of work at the BBC (which I was). It was a letter from me aged 15, that I’d done for a high school English class, and the teacher had kept it and 10 years later had mailed it out.” Perhaps at some
WATCH MICHAEL NEILL TALK TO BERNARDO MOYA IN THE BEST YOU VIDEO INTERVIEW THE BEST
YOU
Life Without Limits
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THE BEST YOU FEATURE
unconscious level Michael was responding to the right choices, even then. While in London he learned about Tony Robbins and NLP – and since the techniques he learned from books worked for him – he tried them on others, finding that they really helped them. It was a revelation to him when he learned a simple technique from Tony Robbins’ Unlimited Power that told him to “turn down the volume knob on the voice inside your head”. Michael recalls: “It got quiet. And the inside of my head hadn’t been quiet since I was 17 years old, and that was shocking to me!” Impressed by this “beautiful feeling” he remembers going on every course he could, borrowing money if he needed to, just to make it work. Michael was clearly driven by his instincts over what to do next. As he puts it: “When the inner voice wanted me to go left, I did.” This was just the case as his career in acting and in coaching developed side by side. He read up on Richard Bandler’s work and had a great realisation - “You can actually just talk to somebody and
their life gets better.” That was when he trained fully as an NLP Practitioner, Master Practitioner, Trainer - and eventually became a master trainer, “totally hooked” on helping people. As for how this success came to him, he says he certainly set goals, but “I really did have the goal life and then the real life was much, much better. And if I have a regret, it’s that I didn’t give up on the goals earlier because the real life was so organic. I never had to try, I never tried to succeed at NLP.” He explains: “It was just ‘Oh, here’s a person, can I help them? Oh, that didn’t work,
ABOVE Michael Neill in action
BELOW Michael is on the road to somewhere
where can I learn what might?’” Luck played a part in Michael’s path, too. Paul McKenna used to come into a bookshop where Michael worked and they just got on. He sometimes asked Michael to come in and teach with him and Michael Breen. Later still Paul asked Michael to train alongside him and Richard Bandler. Michael speaks of Richard “the Godfather” of Self Help as somewhat daunting. But when he saw him signing the NLP certificates he was to hand out at his training, he came to really appreciate him: “I said to him: ‘You sign your own certificates?’ He looked at me... and said: ‘I don’t just sign them, I love them.’ He literally put energy into each signature.” Michael also kept evolving, and eventually moved on from NLP as he learned new things. Learning has been central to his life. He has also responded to his inner needs instinctively. So when he saw a BBC documentary about a dysfunctional autistic child whose family saved for two years to take him to the Option Institute in the US. “About a week into the documentary you see him get up in the middle of the night and make himself a bowl of scrambled eggs...” This was a transformation of a boy who couldn’t even tie his own shoelaces. Michael
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called Institute after the show aired and arranged a visit, and before long, he was learning from them. Their approach influenced his first two books. Another great influence was the Scottish thinker Sid Banks, Michael recalls. “He just said something so simple... he said: ‘Every human being has innate mental health.’” For Michael it just hit the spot. He’d spent so much time trying not to be depressed working out how to handle depression - and now he realised: “I was born happy... Babies don’t need therapy.” He explains: “We learn to be unhappy. And the truth is the second we stop thinking the way we’ve learnt to think, we’re right back to the default.” This is the central point to his book: The Inside Out Revolution, in which he shows people how to change what’s going on in their minds rather than changing what’s going on “out there”. It sounds familiar, similar to the early realisation Michael had as a suicidal teenager that something was going on “up there” in his head to make him unhappy, since his life was fine. Michael speaks fondly of his great relationship with his wife and kids. He talks of clients who come to him having not found that balance yet. One client realised there was something out of balance when
her five-year-old daughter said: “Let’s play mummies and daughters.” After announcing she would be the mummy, she picked up her mummy’s purse and said: “I’ve got to go now honey, bye.” For others, the source of their happiness and inspiration is the thing they are so far removed from. These days, he says that his role as a coach is to wake his clients to their soul, “to wake them up to the power inside them, to that intelligence and energy and life that we’re all a part of.” He contrasts this with the more standard approach to happiness: “...We try and find this power, this willpower and make ourselves succeed and be happy and do things, when actually we’re hooked up to this much, much greater power that everyone has access to.” He compares trying to do things “the empowered way” as being like blowing to try to move a sailboat. Sometimes when it catches a current it moves quickly and you think you’ve made it happen. “But sailboats aren’t designed to run that way; sailboats are designed to catch... that creative force, that wind, that power of mind that all of us have, if we let it. If we get that it’s there... it will take us places.” It’s an approach that has certainly worked for Michael.
ABOVE Michael thrives on helping people
BELOW Michael did a lot of work for the BBC in his acting days
Throughout his life he has followed the inner voice that has instinctively told him what to do and which path to follow. Life has worked better when he hasn’t set specific goals – it is more that he has a mindset open to opportunity and a deep driving curiosity. His own view seems to be that you don’t give people the seven effective habits of success or similar, but that you wake people up to the genius inside. So perhaps there is no secret to success, except for authenticity and happiness. This central part of The Inside Out Revolution is also what guides his views on people trying to make their ways in the world. Asked what young people leaving school nowadays need to know, his answer is simple: “Recognise, a) there is an absolute foolproof way to navigate through life; that if you learn that inner guidance system it will take you places way beyond what you could create with a goal list... The other is recognising that the next great idea isn’t out there... it’s going to come into your head when there is nothing much else on your mind...” It’s a straightforward message – having these two pieces of insight means you’ll be able to go out and enjoy your life. “Then you might wind up having a wonderful life and driving a Porsche, you might wind up having a wonderful life driving a bicycle... either way, you get to have a wonderful life.”
b
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THE BEST YOU
INNER YOU
THE BEST
YOU
Connect with the wonderful, special and powerful inside... Learn new ways to get your mind and body in balance, bring out the rich core of your being... and discover the secrets that will enable you to take charge of your Inner Life and become The Best You.
Life Without Limits
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SHE’S STILL STANDING We get to know a bit more about Mel Carnegie, author and future contributor
BEYOND THE FEAR Gillian Jones tells us how we can get over the fear and become more confident
INNER YOU
MEL CARNEGIE
SHE’S STILL STANDING We are delighted to welcome new author Mel Carnegie as a regular contributor to The Best You. We asked her a few questions for her first appearance, so you can get to know all about her!
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THE BEST YOU: MEL, TELL US A LITTLE ABOUT WHO YOU ARE AND HOW YOU CAME TO JOIN US? Mel Carnegie: I’m a leadership development specialist, motivational trainer, author, and founder of DeNA (the inside-out training programme that changes peoples’ lives for the better). I spend my days working with business leaders and their teams, helping them to be the best they can… and I absolutely love it! Like so many of us, my journey to who I’ve become has not been an easy one. From an early age I learned how to cope with adversity. My new book I’m Still Standing tells my story about overcoming adversity – not just once but many times over. My personal message is that if I can come through all that I have, then so can others.
ANNE JIRSCH INNER YOU
TBY: TELL US MORE ABOUT YOUR JOURNEY INTO PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT. MC: My love affair with selfdevelopment really came in to being 16 years ago, just after my son turned one. I had just become a single mother, and was browsing in a bookshop for some inspiration when Louise L Hay’s book You Can Heal Your Life quite literally fell off the shelf and on to my feet. I bought it, took it home, and devoured it in one sitting. A couple of days later I spotted an advert the size of a postage stamp at the back of a Big Issue magazine, inviting people to enrol on a course to become trainers of Louise Hay’s methodology. The course absolutely blew me away, and I came straight back home and resigned from my well-paid job in advertising. Of course my actions raised a few eyebrows, but I have never looked back. I started running weekend workshops sharing the teachings of Louise Hay and I found the experience both empowering and humbling. It was a magical time, and it was through these workshops that I discovered my love for helping others to free themselves from limitations. Within 18 months I achieved qualifications in NLP, Reiki and even as a certified fire-walking instructor!
TBY: HOW DID YOU MOVE FROM PERSONAL SELF-DEVELOPMENT INTO THE CORPORATE WORLD – IT’S QUITE A JUMP ISN’T IT? MC: On the fire-walking instruc-
tors programme I met the man I later married. He was working as a trainer and coach in business, and soon after we got together we founded a leadership development company that combined both our skills and resulted in an experiential-based training approach. It quickly became successful and we attracted a number of blue-chip clients. Word spread that what we were doing was unique, fun, and most importantly, delivered outstanding long-term results. My husband has long since gone (more about that in later issues!) while the business remains and continues to thrive.
ABOVE Mel has turned her difficult past into a success story
FAR LEFT NLP seminars changed Mel’s Carnegie’s life
TBY: SO WHAT’S NEXT FOR MEL CARNEGIE? MC: Life continues to be a rollercoaster, that’s for sure. For so many years it had been a terrifying, stomach-churning ride that jolted me from one trauma to another. These days it’s a very different story. Yes, I still face challenges – and these days I am also equipped with sufficient experience and knowledge that I can choose
LEFT Mel says life continues to be an emotional rollercoaster
my responses. As one of my favourite quotes so rightly states, “Life is like a rollercoaster. It has its ups and downs. But it’s your choice to scream or enjoy the ride.” My focus now is to share DeNA with as many people as possible – and my dream is to see the programme adopted in schools, so that our children are fully equipped to build a world where humanity is king, and joy is the currency. Through my work I have been approached to feature in a movie akin to “The Secret” that is being filmed this autumn in the USA, alongside such world-famous luminaries as Brian Tracy and Don Miguel Ruiz among others. It’s a huge honour and an incredible opportunity, and I am absolutely thrilled to be involved! b
Over the next few issues of The Best You, Mel will be sharing more about the five-step methodology that is DeNA, so that you can start to understand and use some of the techniques to make positive differences in your life.
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INNER YOU
GILLIAN JONES
BEYOND THE FEAR 18 | WWW.THEBESTYOUMAGAZINE.CO
GILLIAN JONES
I
have coached many people over the years whose irrational fears continuously aggravate their low self-esteem issues and stop them from achieving greatness. It makes me sad when I hear the opportunities they have missed and the things they would have loved to do but never found the courage to. It may have been something fun, or maybe it was standing up to someone. In each of these situations what is consistent is the absence of sparkle in their eyes and the dullness in the tone of their voice. It’s not really living, but simply existing. So where do these fears come from? What make us feel this way? How did we get to the point where we are so terrified of something that won’t hurt us, and certainly won’t kill us? You may not like this, but the answer is you. The fear comes from you, your imagination and your internal programming. That may be hard for you to accept, but aside from those who have tried something and have real reason to fear it, i.e. a bungee jump where the cord came loose, or the surfing incident where a shark cruised by, then your fears are simply your own mind playing tricks on you. In life, everything we do we have programmed ourselves to do, whether that is a positive programming, like a sports person who has persuaded themselves they are capable of scoring an amazing goal, or negatively, like the person who has persuaded themselves that they are terrified of flying. Unfortunately, once we take our brain on a journey to programme a new neurological pathway, it is very happy to continue that journey and provide evidence for you that your fear is correct. So, if it was you who programmed yourself to have this fear, then it makes
INNER YOU
Becoming confident and improving your self-esteem can be a scary task. Gillian Jones, co-founder of Emerge Development Consultancy, gives us some advice on how to overcome the fear and do it anyway
How did we get to the point where we are so terrified of something that won’t hurt us OPPOSITE Gaining confidence means doing something scary
BELOW Start looking ahead to overcome fears, no matter what they are
sense that you can programme yourself to be confident and not fearful. Let’s focus on your fears. If you take a long look at the things you haven’t done, or don’t do because of your fears, why not take some time to analyse them in the cold light of day and see what is really holding you back? Lay them bare on the table in front of you and see whether you can isolate the fear and put some shape to it. Then reject it! Face that fear off. Square up to it and tell it to do its worst, because whatever that is, it will never be as bad as you thought it would be. And once you have isolated it, put it back in the box and don’t over analyse it. Keep telling yourself “I have recognised it, I have seen what the fear looks like and I am ready to do it!” Start programming your mind for success. Every time you think about what you want to do, use positive language, tell yourself you are looking forward to it – that it will be exciting/fun/
interesting/a great challenge – whatever feels appropriate to you. If anyone asks how you feel, use positive language to tell them, such as “I can’t wait to have a go/I am looking forward to it…” When you use negative language either internally or externally, like “I am so nervous, I am dreading it”, the brain searches for this state and gives it to you, so only give it positive states to search for. Once you have adjusted your programming, just do it, in true Nike style. Have a go and see what it feels like. It’s quite exhilarating to march into a situation that you previously thought you couldn’t handle and coming out the other side achieving something fantastic. Or even if you don’t achieve what you set out to, just trying is an achievement in itself. b Here is our philosophy for Emotional Independence. Sign up to it now and be amazed at the difference it makes to you:
R eflect on your life, needs and goals, and focus on your personal vision E nergise yourself to make changes S tart to see yourself differently, and others will follow P lan the changes you need to make and the support you will need E ngage positive thinking – know you can be whoever you want to be C hange your behaviour and keep reflecting on the impact of the changes T ransform your life – live each day to the full, don’t wait for tomorrow. Do it now!
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LET’S CONNECT
THE BEST YOU
ENJOY LIFE
THE BEST
YOU
Laughter, humour, travel, love - these add the sparkle that make life worth living. Climb a mountain, give to others, start a family, embrace life... What are the things you wish you had done, but haven’t yet? Life is no rehearsal - find ways to enjoy it, whenever you can!
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IT’S A WONDERFUL WORLD Working on that bucket list? Here are eight places you need to see
A RAW DEAL
Raw food is all the rage in Hollywood. We give you the lowdown
OUT OF THE DARKNESS COMES THE LIGHT Wellbeing blogger Sophia Husbands tells us how to deal with bad news
ENJOY LIFE
BUCKET LIST
The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page. – SAINT AUGUSTINE
What a wonderful
WORLD
T
here are so many fantastic places to visit on this beautiful planet. It would be difficult to choose a top 100, so getting it down to eight is practically impossible. So, just to give you fair
①
warning, we will definitely be featuring more articles on top eight places to visit. Our strategy is to break it up into categories, such as top eight cities you have to see, or top eight places you have to see because they are just plain weird. But to
THE TAJ MAHAL IN INDIA
It was built by Mughal emperor Shah Jahan in memory of his third wife, Mumtaz Mahal. The Taj Mahal is widely recognized as ”the jewel of Muslim art in India and one of the universally admired masterpieces of the world’s heritage”. The construction began around 1632 and was completed around 1653, employing thousands of artisans and craftsmen. FUN FACT: Legend has it that Shah Jahan had planned to construct another Taj Mahal in black marble on the other side of the river, but the war with his sons interrupted his plans.
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start off, we’re keeping it pretty classic – Wonders of the World. We know that there are only seven official wonders, but we’ve added an honorary one that we think is worthy. Do you know which one it is (without using Google)?
②
This issue we are starting a regular column – the “Bucket List” column. Every month we will feature eight things to do before you die. And we’re kicking off (excuse the pun) with a classic – places to visit.
THE GREAT PYRAMID OF GIZA
The Great Pyramid of Giza (also known as the Pyramid of Khufu or the Pyramid of Cheops) is the oldest and largest of the three pyramids in the Giza Necropolis bordering what is now El Giza, Egypt. It is the oldest of the Seven Wonders of the Ancient World, and the only one to remain largely intact. FUN FACT: The mortar used is of an unknown origin. It has been analyzed and its chemical composition is known but it can’t be reproduced. It is stronger than the stone and still holding up today.
BUCKET LIST
③
CHRIST THE REDEEMER IN BRAZIL
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CHICHEN ITZA IN MEXICO
⑦
THE GREAT WALL OF CHINA
Considered the largest Art Deco statue in the world and the fifth largest statue of Jesus in the world. It is 98 feet tall, not including 26 foot pedestal, and its arms stretch 92 feet wide. FUN FACT: Christ the Redeemer statue was built exclusively on the money donated by the Catholic community of Brazil.
The site shows many architectural styles, reminiscent of styles seen in central Mexico. This was once thought to have been an indication of direct migration or even conquest from central Mexico, but now this is seen as the result of cultural diffusion. FUN FACT: Visitors are no longer allowed to climb the stairs of the Castillo in order to better preserve the monument.
Part of the reason the Great Wall of China was built was to protect the Chinese Empire or its prototypical states against nomads and warlike forces. The building of the wall began as early as the 7th century BC and is 13,170.69 miles long. FUN FACT: Contrary to popular belief, it cannot be seen from the moon without aid.
ENJOY LIFE
④
MACHU PICCHU IN PERU
⑥
THE COLOSSEUM IN ROME
It was built by the Incas around 1450 as an official site for the Inca rulers, but abandoned it a century later at the time of the Spanish Conquest. It was unknown to the outside world outside Peru before being brought to international attention in 1911 by the American historian Hiram Bingham. FUN FACT: Archaeologists found ruins of palaces, temples, fortresses and even stone aqueducts that supplied water to the city.
The Colosseum is situated just east of the Roman Forum. Construction began under the emperor Vespasian in 70 AD, and was completed in 80 AD under his successor and heir, Titus. The Colosseum seated 50,000 spectators, and was used for gladiatorial contests and other public spectacles. FUN FACT: The Ancient Romans would flood the Colosseum and have miniature ship and navel battles inside.
⑧
PETRA IN JORDAN
Established as early as 312 BC as the capital city of the Nabataeans, Petra is Jordan’s most-visited tourist attraction. The site remained unknown to the Western world until 1812, when Swiss explorer Johann Ludwig Burckhardt introduced it. FUN FACT: The Bedouin, who used to use it for target practice, damaged carvings on the treasury.
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ENJOY LIFE THE BEST YOU
A RAW DEAL When you hear the word “diet”, the first things you probably think about are all those fad diets – the Atkins, the Ornish, the Pritkin. You’d be forgiven for thinking that rawism is just another fad, but The Best You is here to tell you differently.
A
ccording to Web MD, rawism, or the raw food diet, isn’t a weight loss programme – it’s a lifestyle choice, such as vegetarianism or veganism. People who make the commitment to rawism are embarking on a journey of culinary commitment, taking on a lifestyle that requires them to spend hours in the kitchen, chopping, peeling, cutting and dehydrating. Rawism is something that is taking the world by storm. Nineties starlet and staunch vegan Alicia Silverstone swears by the diet, and she has other A-listers such as Sting, Susan Sarandon and Edward Norton for company in her beliefs. But
celebs shouldn’t be enough to sway you. Let’s take a look at what rawism is and what it can do for you.
MAIN PICTURE Rawism may sound dull, but there are many wonderous things to eat
WHAT IS A RAW FOOD DIET? The idea behind the raw food diet is that foods are eaten in their most natural and unprocessed states. However, that doesn’t mean you’ll be sitting around eating steak tartare and sashimi. Most raw foodists are vegans, which means they don’t eat any animal products at all, but there are some that eat the occasional raw egg or cheese made from unpasteurised milk. Because of this, 75 per cent of the diet is made up of fruits and vegetables,
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but raw foodists need to be careful about which fruit and vegetables they eat. They don’t get protein from meat and other animals products, so they must be sure to eat fruit and vegetable that are rich in protein.
WHAT DO RAW FOODISTS EAT?
ABOVE A nice fresh salad is a standard meal for a raw foodist
Staples of the raw food diet include seaweed, sprouts, whole grains, beans, dried fruits and nuts. Alcohol, caffeine and refined sugars are absolute no-nos. Most of what they eat is completely raw, but dehydration is a popular method of food preparation, even though it uses heat. However, the temperature of a dehydrator does not exceed
THE BEST YOU
47°C, so it is believed to retain the natural goodness of the vegetables that traditional cooking methods destroy.
WHAT ARE THE BENEFITS? Even though rawism is not a weight loss plan, one of the side effects of cutting animal products out of your diet is that you will lose weight, which is great, if that’s what you’re after. People who have been on the raw diet also claim to feel better, have more energy and
clearer skin. Many people also believe that it reduces one’s risk of many different types of cancer, as well as various other diseases. For example, research has found that regular ingestion of raw cruciferous vegetables (such as cabbage, Brussels sprouts, broccoli, and kale) decreases your chances of bladder cancer.
WHAT’S THE CATCH? The health benefits of a raw food diet are heavily debated amongst health experts. While
WHAT SHOULD YOU DO? Whether or not you want to become a raw foodist or not is completely your decision. If you do decide to give it a try, just be aware of the elements that the diet lacks, and make sure you get them in other forms. But as we mentioned before, there’s a lot of work involved in this diet. After all, it’s a lifestyle.
it is almost common knowledge that raw fruit and vegetables are better for you than cooked ones, it is also argued that cooking certain vegetables rids them of harmful food-borne bacteria. Also, because animal products contain substances that we need, such as protein, iron, vitamin D and vitamin B12, many raw foodists suffer from anaemia and vitamin deficiencies. That is why is it so important for people who follow this diet to be on a plethora of supplements. They are also more likely to suffer from osteoporosis owing to the lack of calcium they would otherwise get from dairy products, and rapid weight loss, which often occurs during this diet, can result in the loss of bone mass.
ENJOY LIFE
IN AN UPCOMING ISSUE… We definitely want to know more about all this raw food stuff, so we are sending one of our team to do a raw food detox. Read all about her experience in a future issue of The Best You.
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ENJOY LIFE SOPHIA HUSBANDS
OUT OF THE DARKNESS CAME THE Bad news is inevitable, whether it is from the TV, newspapers, or in a personal capacity. Blogger, Sophia Husbands, advises us to turn bad news into life lessons
T
he way in which we react to news tells us a lot about our characters. People don’t like to receive bad news as it conjures up negative emotions and thoughts. It can have an impact on our bodies too – that sinking feeling, going to the pit of our stomach. Stress is also a negative impact of bad news. Some people may think that it is fictional, but stress can also have a negative effect on the body.
THE NEWS – THE BIG, BAD WORLD In our day-to-day lives, bad news can be delivered in many mediums: TV, newspapers, radio and social media. One option is to limit this information by simply switching off the news. However, news can also be delivered in person with the opening word; “unfortunately”. No one likes to hear that word and the bad news that usually follows, and it’s probably not fun for the person delivering
In accordance with the laws of the universe, there must be both good and bad in order to keep balance
LEFT Hearing bad news can cause stress
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the bad news either. Remember the saying, “Being the bearer of bad news”?
ACCEPTING THE GOOD, THE BAD AND THE UGLY The English dictionary defines the word “equilibrium” as “a state in which opposing forces or influences are balanced.” So, in accordance with the laws of the universe, there must be both good and bad in order to keep balance. We need to accept that there is going to be bad stuff thrown at us at times. Human beings are creatures of habits. Our egos do not accept change easily. There is no winner when we are resisting negative forces instead of accepting them. The same concept is taught in business books, especially when looking at change management. Reduce resistance by accepting the change.
BE OPEN, BECAUSE OUT OF THE DARKNESS, COMES LIGHT The bad stuff is not all that bad. How we deal with it
SOPHIA HUSBANDS
ENJOY LIFE
DID YOU KNOW ? Being under lot of stress for long time causes your brain to halt and put it in non-functioning mode.
you could ask is, “what lesson I am meant to learn here?” This may be a hard question to ask if you have, for example, lost a loved one. But it could be a reminder to be true to yourself and to appreciate life. Some people describe this reaction as a wake-up call.
is all linked to our mind-set. How we perceive and react to things. The truth is that it may not be all that bad. The typical reaction is, “Why me?” or “Why is this happening?” This often leads onto, “Bad things happen for a reason.” Things don’t just happen; there must be reasoning behind them – lessons to be learnt. For example, relationships can sometimes be negative. A person may have had a bad relationship with a partner who hasn’t treated them well. The relationship may have finally ended upon hearing the news that the partner had been unfaithful. This revelation presents a choice: To cry and
feel sorry for themselves; or learn the lesson of self-love and accepting kindness from a future partner. So out of the darkness comes light.
b
YOU HAVE THE POWER TO CHOOSE THE OUTCOME Our mind is a very powerful source and can have an impact on the outcome of bad news. The law of attraction talks about how focusing on something can create more of that substance. It may be hard to think about positives when initially faced with bad news. When receiving bad news, one reaction is to come from a more positive mind-set, rather than a negative one. One question
RECOMENDED READING The Power of Positive Living By Norman Vincent Peale l Takes
BELOW Getting over bad news may seem impossible, but it’s not
“Easier said than done”, you may say. But we have the power to step in and control how we use the energy of emotions. As the Good Witch from The Wizard of Oz says to Dorothy, “You had the power all along”. So with the delivery and reaction to bad news, you have the power to decide how you are going to turn the outcome around. See the rainbow.
us one step further to discovering the power of self-belief.
The Best You website is packed with loads of great books, DVDs, CDs, downloads, free articles and reports. Check it out now: www.thebestyou.co
Change Your Thinking, Change Your Life By Brian Tracy
10 Secrets to Success and Inner Peace By Wayne Dyer
l How
lThese
to unlock your full potential for success
simple steps will help guide you to a more fulfilled peaceful life.
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Do you think the former CEO of Virgin Atlantic can teach you something? How about the CEO of Ann Summers? Book now for this exclusive event limited to 20 people
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09th Oct
For more details contact us on +44 (0)845 230 2033 www.thebestyou.co/masterclass
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THE BEST YOU
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Life Without Limits
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To acquire the habit of reading is to construct for yourself a refuge from almost all the miseries of life.� – W. Somerset Maugham
Great reading, viewing and listening to empower, entertain, enrich, delight and enhance. The Best You rounds up classics and new books and media products that will make such a positive difference in your life.
BOOK REVIEWS
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BEYOND BLUE
BY THERESE BORCHARD Beyond Blue is part memoir/part self-help. It describes Borchard’s experience of living with manic depression as well as providing cutting-edge research and information on dealing with mood disorders. By exposing her vulnerability, she endears herself immediately to the reader and then reduces even the most depressed to laughter as she provides a companion on the journey to recovery and the knowledge that the reader is not alone. Comprised of two parts and seventeen chapters, Beyond Blue covers a wide range of topics from codependency to addiction, poor body image to postpartum depression, from alternative medicine to psychopharmacology, managing anxiety to applying lessons from therapy. Because of her laser wit and Erma Bombeck sense of humor, every chapter is entertaining as well as serious.
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THE BEST YOU
BOOK REVIEWS
This self-help memoir offers hope, particularly for those with intractable depression. Even better, it offers levity – Publishers Weekly
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BOOK REVIEWS
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FROM MY HANDS AND HEART BY KATE MACKINNON
Craniosacral therapy (CST) is a powerful hands-on treatment that supports the body’s own wisdom and innate ability to heal. Tens of thousands of practitioners around the world can attest to the effectiveness of this rapidly growing therapy. In From My Hands and Heart, Kate Mackinnon interweaves her personal journey of using CST with case studies and detailed, easy-to-understand explanations of the theory behind it. Whether you’ve never heard of CST before, thought it didn’t apply to you, or are currently undergoing treatments, this book has something for you. Mackinnon guides you through creating a team of practitioners focused on your wellbeing, and explains how to help yourself at home between sessions. You’ll learn simple, safe techniques that almost anyone can perform and receive. Most important, you’ll gain a deeper understanding of the amazing powers of the human body and how, with individualized support through CST, it can find its own way to balance and health.
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I enthusiastically endorse the work of this highly skilled, intuitive, spirituallybased healer, whom I am proud to call my friend and colleague – Wayne Dyer
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BOOK REVIEWS
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I’M STILL STANDING BY MEL CARNEGIE
Mel Carnegie vividly recounts how she has fought adversity since childhood, beginning with the death of her father when she was just four years old and culminating with the discovery that her ten-year marriage had been nothing but a sham. She now believes that the man she called her soulmate was a sociopath. Sociopaths, or psychopaths as they are also known, live and breathe among us. They look normal and they sound normal. Typically they come across as being charming, charismatic and the life and soul of the party. But underneath the mask they are predators, searching for people and situations that will give them their next ‘hit’, whatever that might be: money, status, sex, a facade of credibility... They see other people as nothing more than providers, who usually don’t notice what they’re doing until it’s too late. Leaving trails of chaos, confusion and destruction behind them, they’ll simply move straight on to their next willing target without even a backwards glance. When Mel discovered the truth about the man she called her soulmate, she pulled on all her life experiences to fight her way back to life and to ultimate victory. Here she shares her journey with candid and often brutal honesty in the hope that she can help others recognise and escape the clutches of emotional abuse.
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THE BEST YOU
BOOK REVIEWS
An honest and heartfelt account of the authors life and trials and overcoming adversity and hardship – Donna
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BOOK REVIEWS
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THE INSIDE OUT REVOLUTION BY MICHAEL NEILL
Would you like to experience amazing clarity, peace, and freedom, even in the midst of challenging circumstances? In this ground-breaking new book, bestselling author Michael Neill shares an extraordinary new understanding of how life works that turns traditional psychology on its head. This revolutionary approach is built around three simple principles that explain where our feelings come from and how our experience of life can transform for the better in a matter of moments. Understanding these principles allows you to tap into the deeper intelligence behind life, access your natural wisdom and guidance, and unleash your limitless creative power. You’ll be able to live with less stress, greater ease, and a sense of connection to the larger unfolding of life. Welcome to the space where miracles happen... Are you ready to begin?
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Relationships, work, driving, in fact everywhere... I see them all now with a fresh pair of eyes and it just makes me smile. – M. O’Connor
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VOICE
BY KRISTEN WHITE Permission Granted! Cure Your Invisibility... Step into the Spotlight and Share Your Message with the World. Communication technology is exploding and new media channels are coming on the scene to meet the growing demand of a world hungry for information and inspiration! This quantum shift has created an amazing opportunity for those who have a passionate message to share. Experts today can broadcast, publish, promote and publicize their content without restriction. The only obstacle is in the mindset of the individual. What do you have to say? Who do you want to be? What are you destined to do? Find your voice. Let’s start a ripple! This book is for you if you want to... • Become a recognized thought leader in your area of expertise • Create your own TV or radio show and broadcast it to the world • Make a lasting impact on the planet with your message • Release mental and emotional blocks to living your life purpose • Overcome fear of being the recognized expert in your field • Unlock your charisma and become a magnetic voice attracting millions
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BOOK REVIEWS
Voice by Kristen White will be available from 19 June 2013.
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THE BEST YOU
LIVE LOVE LEGACY
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What do you want to be remembered for? What are your relationships like with those around you? How does life treat you - and how do you treat your life? There is so much good in you. Enrich your life with the passion you feel and the connections you make.
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A WOMAN OF MANY FACETS
Kristen White, host of The Ripple Effect, chats to us about life, love and having fun
MODERN FAMILIES
Families nowadays are a far cry from the nuclear family of the 1950s
DEALING WITH JEALOUSY
Are you green with envy? Therese Borchard gives us some tips on getting over it
LIVE LOVE LEGACY THE BEST YOU THE BEST YOU
A WOMAN OF MANY FACETS
K
risten White defines herself as life coach, media coach, author, mentor, and a list of various other descriptions, but if she had to pick one, she would have to go with “media host”. “What I do is teach people how to create powerful media messages that can impact the planet”, she explains. “A lot of people out there have something important to say, but they just haven’t quite figured out how to say it – how to be a powerful messenger.” Primary as her media hosting may be, it is far from
the only thing that she does. What Kristen has achieved in her lifetime thus far is more than what most people could achieve in three lifetimes. Keeping busy is certainly a way of life for the woman who has everything. “Oh, I do have everything”, Kristen says happily. “I’m married, and my husband is the executive producer of the show, so we get to travel together. I’m very blessed because I met someone and he’s turned out to be that perfect spiritual partner. It’s very exciting to be able to share your success and to be able to create something together and so that is one thing that I celebrate very
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The Best You would like to welcome Kristen White, American media personality and host of The Ripple Effect, as a regular columnist. But before we dive right into her opinions, we thought we’d introduce you to her and get to know her a bit
ABOVE Kristen with a guest on The Ripple Effect
BELOW Lights, camera, action!
much. I have three children. One is nine, one is 13 and the other one is 15, and now I have a stepdaughter who is 18. So I have four kids, all successful.” Kristen elaborates on her busy and successful life: “I’m not always striving, but I am always moving. There’s a distinction between that. At the end of the day, all that matters is our personal relationships. Do we have love within our families? Do we have love within our friendships? Do we have love within our partnerships, and is there balance and harmony? Because in the end that’s really all that matters.” If you’re living outside of the US, then you may not be familiar with Kristen’s show, The Ripple Effect, the launch of which Kristen sites as one of the proudest moments of her career. “It’s a news style talk show that focuses on wellness, personal development and spirituality”, explains Kristen. “I believe that there are millions and millions of seekers in the world who are looking for a
THE BEST YOU
It’s very exciting to be able to share your success and to be able to create something together and so that is one thing that I celebrate very much..
LIVE LOVE LEGACY
BY CHRISTOPHER DELANEY
DYSLEXIC NO HOPER
positive channel of energy to transform their lives, and that right now on TV there’s a lot of negative. I call it homicides, house fires and heartache. And it’s interesting because I think a majority of people don’t want to watch that. I think that they would prefer to watch things that uplift, that inspire, that give them hope. That may shed light in an area of their lives that they weren’t even aware needed some light. And so that’s the whole concept around The Ripple Effect”, she says. “I call it transformational TV.” Transforming television and the people who watch it is a worthy goal, and with her vow to always move forward, Kristen’s future sure looks bright, and fun too. “The truth of the matter is at the end of the day it’s all joyful. I mean it is fun. We’re just having fun. You know I work in the world of media and TV and we need to keep that light.” b
TOP Kristen is a woman content with her lot in life MIDDLE Kristen has a way of making her guests feel at ease
BOTTOM Meeting new people every day is one of the perks of Kristen’s job
Sitting in front of my laptop with my newly released book, Interviewing the Interview’ lying on the table in front of me and my inbox full of potential coaching referrals and enquires, I still can’t believe this is real. I look back on my life and remember the dyslexic teenager, forced to attend a ‘special’ school, predicted to fail not only his GCSEs, but in life. So how did NLP turn my life turn around? After eight years of working in a factory, I knew if I wanted to make a change, I’d have to take on-board the NLP advice if you want a different result, do something different. I started volunteering as a scout leader, youth worker and rest-bite worker for disabled children. As a volunteer I gained loads of skills and experiences which gave me the confidence to apply for paid work and I luckily landed a job as an employment trainer. I had always wanted to write a book, but after my dyslexic childhood, writing for me made me anxious. After a two-day NLP conference where Richard Bandler used hypnotic motivation to inspire all the attendees, I got home a started typing about my two passions – NLP and job interviews. I now have a successful business and a book that is selling all over the world. NLP has been the vessel for my motivation and success. Christopher Delaney is the founder of www.employmentking.co.uk and the author of The 73 Rules for Influencing the Interview – using Psychology, NLP and Hypnotic Persuasion Techniques
If you would like to see your story published, send it to: marketing@thebestyou.co
http://kristenwhitetv.com/
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MODERN FAMILIES Perceptions of the family unit have changed a lot since the nuclear family heyday of the 1950s, and the transition is giving us something far more interesting. The Best You investigates some of the modern family archetypes.
THE BEST YOU LIVE LOVE LEGACY
W
hen I was younger, like most kids from gay adoptions, I wondered why I didn’t have a mom and dad like all of my friends did”, says Rebecca (not her real name), a 17-year-old black girl who was adopted by two white women as a baby. “But once my parents explained it to me, I never felt alienated”, she continues. “I never felt out of place because having two moms was all I’d ever known, just like a mom and a dad was all my friends had ever known.” Rebecca’s story might not be an average tale, but it is far more common than it was just a couple of decades ago. Back then, saying that someone was adopted was considered an insult. Adopted kids may not be seen as outcasts as much now as they were then, but according to Rebecca, it is still challenging: “I think that being adopted, regardless of by whom, or regardless of the situation, can be, and often is, challenging. It’s challenging to come to terms with it, for both the child or children and parents.” Despite being a different race to her parents, and her parents being two moms, Rebecca went through quite a straightforward adoption. She has no contact with her biological family. “I don’t often think about my biological parents”, she states. “I mean, I have now and then, but as of yet I haven’t had the desire to try to find them.” Peter (not his real name) is in a slightly different situation. He too is black and has been cared for by a white woman since he was born. Because she and Peter’s biological mother were friends, they never bothered with a formal adoption. When he was 11 years old, his carer
When the baby was born, everyone was keen to see what colour she’d be popping out ABOVE Mixed race families are far more common now than they used to be
When I was younger a lot of people would mock my accent and laugh because I had a white mum, but I would just sigh
wanted to take him abroad, so they compromised on a guardianship. Although he saw quite a lot of his biological family in his formative years, now that he is a young adult, he has decided to almost sever the ties. “I don’t see much of my biological mother due to some personal reasons, but when I do see her, it tends to not be a great experience”, he explains. Growing up, both Rebecca and Peter were given a hard time by their peers. “When I am surrounded by African language speaking people I feel like I don’t belong”, explains Rebecca. “I often get dirty looks or invasive questions about why I’m not proud of my heritage.” Peter concurs: “When I was younger a lot of people would mock my accent and laugh because I had a white mum, but I would just sigh.” Even though they were mocked and judged, they have both grown into well adjusted young adults who speak about their experiences with grace. But the modern family isn’t only about black kids being adopted by white parents. There is a growing trend that that was illegal in many countries not so long ago. Lindiwe (not her real name) is a black South African who grew up in Johannesburg, and currently lives in the UK with her white Finnish husband, Frans (not his real name). They have a baby girl, who has a very fair complexion despite having a black mother. “I get pretty upset when Frans is
filling in documents and he ticks that our daughter is white. I’ve heard him saying ‘She’s white, she looks white’ and that is a total WTF moment for me, because I’m 100 per cent black, and last I checked, I’m this baby’s mama”, Lindiwe laughs. “When the baby was born, everyone was keen to see what colour she’d be popping out. That was the first question Frans’ parents asked all the way from Finland!” Living in the UK, especially in London, interracial couples are hardly news anymore. “Being an interracial couple here is so normal that it doesn’t even feel different. I am totally blown away by the Brits – they are really the ‘rainbow nation’ that SA claims to be. Don’t get me wrong, I love South Africa, but I don’t think South Africans are as integrated as people are here in the UK.” Being a modern family in 2013 may be easier than it was in the 1950s, but having a family is a challenge, no matter the time or place. But whether you’re a member of a traditional nuclear family, or something a tad less conventional, the family values should remain the same. “We are citizens of the world”, says Lindiwe. “We are raising our daughter outside of the box. I can’t say it’s this or that culture, but we hope to raise a fine human being, and she’ll hopefully go on to do some amazing things in her life and treat people with humility, kindness and respect.”b
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LIVE LOVE LEGACY
THERESE BORCHARD
6 WAYS TO OVERCOME JEALOUSY 46 | WWW.THEBESTYOUMAGAZINE.CO
As Max Ehrmann, author of the classic poem ”Desiderata”, said, “comparing yourself with others will make you either vain or bitter.” But that doesn’t keep me from going to the land of comparisons and envy. I salivate over other authors’ book contracts, or other bloggers’ traffic numbers. Then I have to pull out my set of directions – these six techniques – that lead me away from jealousy and towards selfacceptance.
THERESE BORCHARD
LIVE LOVE LEGACY
The fastest way to despair is by comparing one’s insides with another’s outsides. Therese Borchard, author of Beyond Blue: Surviving Depression & Anxiety, gives us some tips on overcoming that nasty habit. swimmer in the seven to eight age group, they were afraid to dive in the pool or couldn’t figure out how to swim without getting water up their nose.
ened. So, get out your scribbling pad and take some notes. If you want to network with their confidence and charm, then study them at a cocktail party. If you envy their fluid writing style, buy a few of their books, and dissect the sentences just like you did the frog in Biology 101.
DO ONE THING BETTER THAN THEM
FIND YOURSELF
This suggestion comes from a friend: “I believe that if you don’t succeed at first, you keep trying, and that failure teaches us about success. I believe that laughter is the best medicine. I believe that the best revenge against your enemies is to dress better than them.”I absolutely loved the idea of “dressing better than your enemy” because it reminds us that we can always find one thing that we can do better than our “frienemy”. If matching designer outfits gives you a boost of confidence, knock yourself out! If competing in a triathlon just to prove that you are in better shape than your mean cousin with a great figure, sign up!
PUT THE LADLE (AND THE RUNNING SHOES) AWAY GET MORE INFORMATION Most of the time we envy one quality about a person, and we presume the rest of their qualities are as perfect as the one we want. That’s usually not the case. Think Rain Man. Boy, did he know how to count those straws and play poker, but his social skills needed some fine-tuning. Investigate the person you want to temporarily destroy, and you will find that they have their own set of problems and weaknesses. Moreover, if you consider their success in context, you’ll see that they haven’t always been a superstar. Maybe, just maybe, back when you got a blue ribbon for the fastest freestyle
Early on in my writing career, my mentor would tell me (when I panicked at spotting a more popular book on a certain topic than mine): “Her success doesn’t take away from yours. Her numbers have nothing to do with yours.” I always remember that when I start thinking like a gerbil: that there is only one food bowl, and if you don’t get to it first and take as much as you need for an entire year, you and your whole gerbil family will die.
Be quiet for a few hours in a peaceful setting (I suggest some woods or a nearby creek if you’re not afraid of ticks), and introduce yourself to yourself. “Self, meet Self. Nice to meet you, Self.” Then you guys have to become friends. How? Think about all the things you like about yourself. During this time, give yourself a pep talk. Pump yourself up. Maybe sketch out some goals for yourself. What do you need to do to be able to go forward with more confidence? What specific actions will allow you to believe in yourself a tad more?
DO YOUR BEST The ultimate weapon against jealousy is simply to do your best, because that’s all you really can do. Your frienemy may still run further than you, swim faster, and sell more books, but the only thing that matters is that you have done the best job that you can do. Then you can breathe a sigh of relief and feel some satisfaction. b
LEARN FROM HER Your frienemy is doing something right if they have your attention. There is a reason you are threat-
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NLP TRAINING with RICHARD
BANDLER
Co-Creator of NLP
in LONDON INTRODUCTION TO NLP An evening with Richard Bandler 4th October 2013
LICENSED PRACTITIONER OF NLP 7th – 13th October 2013
LICENSED MASTER PRACTITIONER OF NLP 5th – 13th October 2013 Book today on +44(0)845 260 7930 www.nlplifetraining.com info@nlplifetraining.com
THE BEST YOU
FEEL & LOOK GOOD
THE BEST
YOU
Feeling good about yourself makes the joy shine from your eyes and your skin. It makes others respond to you in new ways, and it gives you a whole new outlook on life. Looking good draws others to you and enhances your lives in ways you haven’t yet imagined. It’s great to find new ways to feel and look good now!
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IT’S THE GOOD NEWS So much of the news we read is bad. Here are some stories to lift your spirits
OLD WIVES TALES We look at four health myths you won’t believe aren’t facts
RACE REPORT Last month the annual marathon took over the London streets. We look at how it has changed over the years
FEEL & LOOK GOOD
THE BEST YOU
THE GOOD NEWS
On page 26 Sophia Husbands wrote about the effects of bad news. It can make us feel stressed and depressed. That’s why The Best You is bringing you snippets of good news. That should make you feel a bit better.
THE MAIN DRAG
A
judge found a man guilty of domestic violence in the Marivan region of northwestern Iran. His sentence? To be paraded through the streets dressed in women’s clothing as a form of public humiliation. A group of Kurdish men found this to be an inappropriate
WE’RE GIVING PEACE A CHANCE
W
henever we turn on the news, there are reports of bombing, wars and genocide, so it may be difficult to believe a recent study that shows the world is more peaceful now than it has ever been. Dan Smith from Positive News reckons that we are making encouraging progress with key global issues such as war and peace. In addition to this, the first
national assessment of British values has revealed that many people are prioritising values such as caring, honesty and trust. And according to Dr Mark Williamson, director of Action for Happiness, because of the constant negativity in our media, “our perception of what happens nationally is more negative than the true picture”. So, while it’s important to keep abreast of current affairs, don’t take all the bad news to seriously. We are heading in the right direction.
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punishment, labelling it as “misogynistic” because being a woman shouldn’t be seen as humiliating. This group of men call themselves Kurd Men for Equality, and 150 of them have posted images of themselves online in drag accompanied by the tagline: “Being a woman is not a way for humiliation or punishment”. Now that’s what makes a real man.
THE BEST YOU
FEEL & LOOK GOOD
THE RICE IS TWICE AS NICE
W
ith the human population swelling to near the seven billion mark, the need to get inventive with food production while saving on natural resources is becoming more and more vital. That is why the latest news from India regarding rice farming is such a revelation. The country is producing record-breaking crops, reducing the need for chemical fertilisers
and saving water. Known as the System of Rice Intensification (SRI), farmers are looking at the traditional ways of growing rice to produce much more. According to The Observer, one farmer harvested 22.4 tonnes of rice from just one hectare of land using only farmyard manure as a fertiliser. That is nearly ten times the average yield per hectare achieved by India’s farmers, and is a new world record in rice farming.
BEATING THE GUNS
A
new programme in Uruguay encourages residents to give up on their gun-toting way of life for a more peaceful existence. The initiative is called Weapons for Life, and cajoles gun owners to turn in their firearms in exchange for a laptop or bike. This is in conjunction with the tightening of gun laws (owning an unregistered gun is now a crime and offenders could serve up to 12 years in prison), and aims to reduce the Uruguayan
gun-owning population, which is currently around 31 per cent. “We are delighted that the ministry is finally taking action on the matter and starting a campaign to discourage gun ownership,” says Gustavo Guidobono, president of the Association for the Fight for Civilian Disarmament. “Effecting this change by using computers or bicycles is unprecedented, but it is welcome.”
PLAYING FAIR
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ith only Wales ahead of them, Scotland has become the second country in the UK, and the world, to be awarded the status of a Fair Trade Nation. All Scottish cities are now considered Fair Trade, and 62 of the smaller towns have either achieved the accolade or are well on their way. Almost two-thirds of higher education institutions
are also keen to be part of the change, and around 75 per cent of Scots now buy a Fair Trade product every year. Even the government is on board, using and promoting Fair Trade products. “The award marks the success of the partnership between producers in the developing world and consumers and campaigners in Scotland”, says Martin Rhodes, director of the Scottish Fair Trade Forum.
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FEEL & LOOK GOOD
THE BEST YOU
OLD WIVES TALES
When it comes to theories about health, there is a lot of ambiguity. The Best You looks at some of the most common health myths, both dangerous and benign, and the facts behind them.
THE MYTH:
AN APPLY A DAY... All together now, "...keeps the doctor away!" While the old adage referencing a daily intake of fresh fruit has some truth to it, apples aren't by any means the most vitamin-rich fruit. If you're looking to get a vitamin boost in one snack, then a handful of blueberries is far more likely to do the trick. Blueberries are considered a superfood and are incredibly rich in vitamins and antioxidants, so they boost your immune system. Plus, they are super delicious. Sprinkle them over your cereal, into a bowl of plain yoghurt, or just eat them plain.
THE MYTH: A STRONG IMMUNE SYSTEM MEANS YOU WON’T GET A COLD You probably think that if you have a really strong immune system, you won't get a cold, but you'd be mistaken. What we recognise as cold symptoms – the stuffy nose, the sore throat, the head full of cotton wool – is actually just your immune system trying to fight off a virus that wasn't going to do you any harm anyway. That is why cold symptoms and allergies are so difficult to tell apart – they are both the immune system overreacting to something. So, effectively, the stronger your immune system is, the more it's going to react to the common cold virus (or rather, any one of over 200 different cold viruses), and the worse you will feel. But before you skip that morning dose of blueberries, keep in mind that you need to keep you immune system strong to fight off other viruses.
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THE BEST YOU FEEL & LOOK GOOD
THE MYTH: If you go out with wet hair, you’ll get sick Don't worry; this article isn't all about heart attacks that creep up on you without warning. On a lighter note, we get to be the ones to tell you that your mother wasn't always right. Remember when she told you and you would "catch your death" if you went out with wet hair? Well, she was wrong. In a study done at the Common Cold Research Unit in Salisbury, England, researchers inoculated a group of volunteers with a cold virus. They then got half of the volunteers to stand in a hallway for half an hour with dripping wet hair, while the other half stayed warm and cosy inside. The result? The people who stayed nice and warm were just as affected by the virus as their wet-haired equivalents, although the latter were far less comfortable, proving once and for all that mother doesn't always know best.
THE MYTH:
Heart attacks hurt If you, like most people, know what you know about heart attacks from film and television, then you probably think that when someone has a heart attack, they always clutch their chest or left arm in agony as they fall to the ground. However, according to the American Heart Association, between 40 and 60 per cent of heart attacks are painless, or as they are commonly called, silent. And the silent type are far more dangerous, because they don't get the medical attention that their arm-clutching counterparts get, so the sufferers aren't even aware that they have a heart problem. So, you might be thinking to yourself, if there are no symptoms, then what is the point of us making you all paranoid with this story? Luckily chest pain is only one symptom in a long list, including toothache or a "sense of doom for no apparent reason". So if you are feeling all doom and gloom and you have a toothache that your dentist can't seem to pinpoint, maybe your next stop should be your cardiologist.
RECOMENDED READING
The Best You website is packed with loads of great books, DVDs, CDs, downloads, free articles and reports. Check it out now: www.thebestyou.co
Moving on Up By Nita Saini
Simple Suppers By Gina Steer
You Can be Thin By Marisa Peer
l Just
l Clear
l The
as relevant for those on medication or in therapy.
step-by- step photography and practical text.
Ultimate Programme to End Dieting... Forever
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FEEL & LOOK GOOD
THE BEST YOU
RACE REPORT
April saw the annual London Marathon once more take to the streets of the great metropolis. The Best You looks at the amazing history of the race that is a record breaker in so many different ways.
I
t all started in a London pub in 1978, after members of the Raneleigh Harriers running club came back from running the New York Marathon, and couldn't stop talking about it. Excited runners reported that unlike the usual British experience of marathons in which 20 runners were watched by ruminating cows and a handful of spectators, the New York Marathon was a completely different experience. That energy is what prompted Olympic runner Chris Brasher and John Disley enter the 1979 race and find out it was all about. Back home, Brasher suggested the idea of a London Marathon in a newspaper article, and the following year planning began. One major obstacle was the Metropolitan Police's fear of bringing the city to a halt by closing 26 miles of road. Once the course along the Thames was agreed, with only two bridges closed down and many tourist sites included, the course was ready to go.
The first year, on 29th March 1981 there were 7,747 runners out of the 20,000 who wanted to run, and 6,255 finishers. By 2013, that figure had swollen to 34,000 runners finishing the course and an amazing 700,000 out on the streets to watch the runners go by. The scale of the marathon grew in other ways, too. At the beginning, it was the individual runners who entered the race for charity - bringing their crazy outfits and sense of fun to what was also a serious, fast marathon. Nowadays, this amazing hybrid of a race and a fundraiser has taken the London Marathon to the record
In 2007, £46.5 million was raised for good causes by runners, making the London Marathon a Guinness world record breaker LEFT The people of London are getting active
RIGHT Run, Londoners, run! Taking part in the London Runs is good for your heart and the cause
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books. In 2007, £46.5 million was raised for good causes by runners, making the London Marathon a Guinness world record breaker as the largest single annual fundraising event in the world. The record was broken again in 2008 when £46.7 million was raised. IIn 2013 there were special challenges for the London Marathon. After the horrible events of the Boston Marathon bombing only the previous week, London security was high. In the end, the race was a great success that passed without incident, with tens of millions of pounds raised by entrants from more 47 nationalities watched by viewers in 150 countries throughout the world. The men's race winner was Tsegaye Kebede who finished in 2 hours 6 minutes 4 seconds, while women's race winner was Priscah Jeptoo 2 hours 20 minutes 15 seconds, a second outside her personal best. Tatyan McFadden celebrated her 24th birthday by winning the women's wheelchair race, while Kurt Fearnley won an eight-man sprint to come in first for the men. b
THE BEST YOU
WEALTH & RICHES
THE BEST
YOU
Life Without Limits
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Wealth [n] “happiness,” also “prosperity in abundance of possessions or riches” from Middle English “wele”, meaning “wellbeing”. Riches [n] “valued possessions, money, property,” Making money and bringing greater wealth to EVERY area of your life...
SHIFTS IN THE WORKPLACE Author and business expert Liz Barclay tells us how the workplace is changing
HOW TO BE A TOP… TV PRESENTER Interested in taking up a career in television? Four top presenters tell you what it takes
A TICKING CLOCK ON THE PENSIONS TIME BOMB
Have you started saving for your retirement yet? Better hop to it
WEALTH & RICHES
LIZ BARCLAY
SHIFTS IN THE WORKPLACE The world of work is changing. Jobs as we know them – working for one employer to do a particular task – are becoming a thing of the past. Small business journalist and adviser, Liz Barclay, says fortune favours those thinking out of the box.
A
lmost one million – that’s more than a fifth – of 16 to 24-year-olds in the UK are unemployed. 73,500 of those have been unemployed for more than a year – almost 3 times as many as three years ago. Youth unemployment has
gone through the roof and a generation of young people, their talents, qualifications and education, could be lost to our future workforce. The picture is even bleaker in some European countries. Youth unemployment has been growing over the last 10 years. With more older people staying on in work because of
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changes in state pensions and retirement ages, poorer work pensions, and the need to carry on earning as prices rise relentlessly, it’s harder for young people to find jobs. And when there are job vacancies, bosses say many young people simply don’t have the right skills and qualifications. Leaving school without any qualifications is almost a guarantee of unemployment. The future is digital and mobile, and young people who understand that are carving out careers for themselves. One in ten workers now spends all day on computers and mobile devices. They send on average
LIZ BARCLAY
10,000 emails a year, one in ten never make phone calls, and almost half never send letters. The workplace is changing, and having been brought up with digital and mobile technology makes young people more suited to that future than older workers. “The Future of Work” study by Richard Watson and Andrew Crosthwaite suggests that in just two years time, around four out of 10 of the total workforce will be mobile. Bosses will increasingly hire freelance workers as and when they need them. Jobs will be replaced by portfolio careers with people doing part-time work for several different firms at the same time – some on a freelance basis (responsible for paying their own tax and National Insurance) and some on the books as employees. The report says: Businesses will have fewer fulltime employees in the future. They will put together teams of talented people as they need them – different teams for different projects. Four out of 10 workers will work away from an office by 2015 – at home perhaps.
The cloud will become more and more important so that people will need fewer mobile devices and will be able to access their work from anywhere. Already a quarter of mobile workers say they work 15-20 hours extra a week because technology enables (or forces) them to do so. The young people now building portfolio careers for themselves in this way will be 60 plus in 35 years time, and by then the over 65s will make up half Europe’s workforce. The young people I know who are busy and fulfilled are portfolio working – like the 23-year-old with a business degree working evenings in a bar, studying for a qualification in financial management, making and selling jewellery on a market stall at weekends and accepting short term contracts advising small businesses on various aspects of their operations. The internet and digital technology allows her to work anytime, anywhere and she’s doing more hours than she would as an employee. Young people are flexible and can switch from one
WEALTH & RICHES
LIZ’S TOP TIPS FOR WORKING OUTSIDE THE BOX Look for part time work to earn some money while getting other projects started Make a list of your qualifications, work experience and interests Ask 10 people who know you what they think you're good at Ask freelancers to help you get set up on your own Get out there and market your services Build each part of your portfolio slowly and keep the part time job until you're earning enough to stop Decide what you’d like to be doing in five years and work on getting the qualifications
ABOVE Technology allows people to work anytime, anywhere
LEFT Employers will hire teams of creatives as and when they need to
occupation to the next easily. Many prefer the freedom of working for themselves to more formal working structures although it doesn’t suit everyone. There’s a future in it and 16 to 24-year-olds looking for a job now, might consider building a portfolio instead. b
DID YOU KNOW ? According to studies conducted on work environments, many places of employment are introducing a flexi-time scheme. This allows working mothers to get their work done without missing out on attending school events.
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WEALTH & RICHES THE BEST YOU
HOW TO BE A TOP TV PRESENTER
The Best You asked three of the top TV presenters in the country what their advice is to get ahead in the game of broadcast journalism.
EAMONN HOLMES, SKY NEWS ON SKY
One of the great secrets of life is to be happy in what you do – if you are, you are bound to do it better. To any one setting out attempting to get into broadcasting, make sure that you love it. Ever since I was 11 years old I wanted to be a Broadcast Journalist. I was a Trainee Manager at Primark for a while and the experience was so tough that it re-focused me and made me disregard other people’s lack of ambition. A year later I was the Young Journalist of the Year. Luck will play a part when your chance comes – but you’ve got to be ready. And the harder you work at what you want, the luckier you will tend to be..
CHARLENE WHITE, ITV NEWS ON ITV
I decided that journalism was the career for me aged 16. I did work placements every year until I finished university, and also had a stint writing for the New York Post. Five years of summer placements meant I walked straight into a job as a Production Journalist when I graduated, and have been working unsociable hours as a journo ever since! You need a passion for news, dedication to the genre, up for working all hours, and that yearning for the thrill of a breaking news story. And of course, you need the gift of the gab.
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KATE QUILTON FOOD UNWRAPPED ON CHANNEL 4 It used to be the case that to get on-screen, you had to wait for someone to give you a break. Local news and children's TV were both well-trodden ladders for fledgling TV presenters. But now, everything’s changed. You can get yourself on-screen and learn your craft along the way. If you want to be a presenter, the tools are available to get on and do it. Identify the thing that you’re interested in, start making videos and get your stuff online. Second piece of advice, clichéd I know, but be yourself. There shouldn’t be a difference between the on-screen ‘you’ and the down-the-pub ‘you’. So long as you're not drunk.
THE BEST
YOU
Life Without Limits
Our editor, Bernardo Moya, has chatted to all sorts of interesting people over the last month, and we're happy to say we'll be featuring some of it in the next issue. Interviews with Humphrey Walters and Kubi Springer to name but a few. And much more.
http://www.youtube.com/TheBestYouTVV
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WEALTH & RICHES
THE BEST YOU
A TICKING CLOCK ON THE PENSIONS TIME BOMB
N
ew research shows that many people are either feeling squeezed by today's economic situation or they simply aren't engaging with the fact that they have a tomorrow to consider. The big question is, are you laying down provision for your retirement?In a recent survey in the UK, the Equity Release Council, the trade body providing consumer information and safeguards regarding the equity release industry found 65 per cent of people were struggling to save for their retirement, while only 16 per cent showed signs of being "savvy and sorted". Recent data published by the Office for National Statistic showed that while 76 per cent of UK households currently save into a pension, the amount of savings needed to fund a regular retirement income has grown substantially since December 2009.
ABOVE Start saving now so that you can be comfortable in your autumn years
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In 2013, a savings pot £458,000 is needed to receive an annual retirement income of £15,000 - 29% more for men than was needed in 2009 when the savings targets was £354,100, and 14% more for women in the same year when they £400,600. Many also see their homes as a potential financial asset, intending to downsize and release equity. This is where the current economic problems have also caused problems. With the current stagnation in house prices in the UK, those who bought interest-only mortgages expecting their house price to far outstrip the initial sum paid for the house and thus being able to profit on the difference at sale are seeing no growth in their purchase. Essentially in the same position as those renting, a million
A crisis is going on. It isn't happening right now, but is due to happen in the coming years. The Best You investigates the pensions time bomb
people in the UK now find that they will have a shortfall of an average £71,000 when it comes to paying off the lump sum. These mortgages were popular in the 1990s when they were sold alongside endowment mortgages and popular again in the 2000s when homeowners essentially bet on the value of their homes rising continuously. Described as "mortgage timebomb" by the BBC, the problem has been recognised by the FCAm the Financial Conduct Authority. In the US among single people, the figures are even more stark. In 2008 the average married household saved nearly 10 times more as they entered retirement than the median single-person household, $111,600 vs. $12,500. That's why in the US
THE BEST YOU mandatory savings accounts are being discussed for anyone with full or part-time job. Laurence Fink, CEO of BlackRock, the world's largest investment firm that has $4 trillion under management and is one of the major players in the financial world says: "We need a comprehensive solution to retirement savings that includes some form of mandatory retirement savings. In a different survey by the UK Money Advice Service, 12 per cent of people aged over 55 who have not yet retired have not considered how their pension will be funded, while 40 per cent are resigned to having to work as long as they
can and eight per cent believe they'll never retire. The Service has dubbed this apathy towards penions as "Pensionitis", a condition that could leave people struggling financially in retirement. Remember, no one else is going to provide for you. It may seem a long way off, but now's the time to start planning for the future!
WEALTH & RICHES FAR LEFT Twelve per cent of people over 55 years old have not planned for their retirement
ABOVE LEFT The earlier you start saving, the more comfortable your retirement will be
WHAT DO YOU NEED TO DO? Engage with the problem. If you haven't yet considered setting up pension provision, no matter what age you are, the time to start is now. Look ahead. It may seem like a major effort to think so far off into the future, but ask yourself, what future would you like? One in which you are living a hand-to-mouth existence in your old age, or one in which you have a stready income that supports you during your wellearned retirement? Get advice. One thing to is check in with a reliable Financial Adviser and set a plan for your future. Save Save Save. Getting into the habit of saving is the starting point. Set aside an agreed amount every month to put into your pension pot and set up that direct debit. Once you've started, then you'll find that your life adjusts to the new investment in your future. Cut your cloth. Look for ways that you can cut spending now to fund that pot. So many people subscribe to services they rarely use. What don't you need? The gym membership? That new car now? Make new money. Think of new ways to make a bit of extra money. Selling things online, getting extra work, looking for other ways to make money at business clubs - all these are options.
RECOMENDED READING Tavis Smiley Fail Up l Readers
will find a kinship in Smiley's humanness that inspires
The Best You website is packed with loads of great books, DVDs, CDs, downloads, free articles and reports. Check it out now: www.thebestyou.co
Alan Carr Easy Way to Debt-Free Living
John Richardson Wake Up and Smell the Profit
l Addresses
l Witty,
the various psychological attitudes to money.
authoritative, comprehensive and fun.
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WEALTH & RICHES
THE BEST YOU
JULIE DEANE
MARK ZUCKERBERG:
INSPIRINGLY INNOVATIVE
TECHNICAL GENIUS
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There are many motives for starting a business, and Julie Deane's is one of the purest. Concerned that her daughter was being bullied at her school in Cambridge, Julie Deane realised that she couldn't afford the fees to move her to a public school. Determined to protect her, she wrote a list of the ten things she could do to make money. At position number four on that list was the idea of selling traditional satchels. She turned this idea into the Cambridge Satchel Company, a business that within four years had a £12 million turnover. Her high quality satchels in bright as well as traditional colours have become a fashion craze, with stars such as Alexa Chung, Fearne Cotton and Elle Fanning sporting her bags. So what drives her? Apart from her motherly love, Deane says her childhood in a Welsh mining area during the pit closures made her realise the social value of industry and of bringing manufacturing jobs to the UK. Julie was the first person in her family to go to University and says she was always driven to set a high goal and then "work like mad" to achieve it. Julie Deane shows the world that quality really does shine through!
As co-founder of Facebook, Mark Zuckerberg is one of the most influential men in the world. Born in 1984, the son of a psychiatrist and a dentist Zuckerberg began using computers and writing software in middle school and learned ATARI basic programming in the 1990s. As a child he designed a system he called "Zucknet" to allow his father's home and work computers to communicate in "Instant Messaging" style, long before AOL had released their system. Both Microsoft and AOL wanted to hire him, but instead he went to Harvard. It was here he wrote a programme he called Facemash which allowed students to vote on who was the "hottest looking". It was so popular it caused the Uni's network to crash and had to be taken down. Zuckerberg launched social networking site Facebook for Harvard in 2004, then spread it to other universities and afterwards throughout the world, becoming a billionaire in 2007 at the age of 23. Major corporations offered to buy the company, but Zuckerberg and his team refused, explaining: "For me and my colleagues, the most important thing is that we create an open information flow for people. Having media corporations owned by conglomerates is just not an attractive idea to me."
HER DEDICATION TO WORK WAS MOTIVATED BY THE IMMEDIATE NEED TO MAKE HER CHILDREN'S LIVES BETTER. IT'S A WONDERFUL STORY FOR ANYONE WONDERING HOW TO MAKE THEIR BUSINESS REALLY SHINE. MORE POWER TO JULIE DEANE!
WHOLE COMMUNITIES SHARE EXPERIENCES THANKS TO HIS VISION, AND BECAUSE OF IT HE IS NOW ONE OF THE WORLD'S MOST INFLUENTIAL PEOPLE WITH A PERSONAL FORTUNE ESTIMATED AT $13 BILLION.
– BERNARDO MOYA
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– BERNARDO MOYA
THE BEST YOU
WEALTH & RICHES
SERENA WILLIAMS
CHRIS BRASHER
GUIDANCE AND BRILLIANCE
A MAN OF MANY TALENTS
I'm a perfectionist. I'm pretty much insatiable. I feel there's so many things I can improve on.
There is something in the Olympics, indefinable, springing from the soul, that must be preserved.
American tennis player Serena Jameka Williams was born in 1981 in Saginaw, Michigan. Her father, a one-time sharecropper decided early to train his girls to succeed. He moved them to Compton, California, a deprived area, to show them their future if they didn't work hard. When she was three he began practising tennis with his daughter on potholed courts for two hours a day. Working from tennis books and videos, though he had no training, by 1991 he took Serena to first ranking in the the US Tennis Association 10-andunders. Professional coaching soon followed when he moved the family to Florida. Serena turned pro in 1995. Already 99 in the world rankings, she graduated high school in 1998 and signed a $12 million shoe deal with Puma. In 1999, she won her first of many Grand Slams with the U.S. Open title. Selected by people magazine as one of its 25 Most Intriguing People and by Essence magazine as one of the country's 50 Most Inspiring African-Americans, she and her sister dominated the woman's game. By 2006 though, Serena seemed burned out. Her tennis ranking slumped to 139, but religious faith and a life-changing journey to Africa revitalised her. By 2009 she was top of the world's rankings again.
Chris Brasher, was an Olympic champion athlete, mountaineer, writer, television executive and entrepreneur. His greatest legacy to British life was the London Marathon, the world's largest single charity event. Born in Georgetown, British Guiana, the son of a radio engineer, he was schooled in England. At St John's College, Cambridge, his talent at middle-distance running blossomed and in 1951 he won the World Student Games 5000 metres and was second in the 1500 metres. Turning to longer distances, he paced Dr Roger Bannister in 1954, to help him achieve the recordbreaking four-minute mile and won gold at the 1956 Olympics in the steeplechase. He went on to bring orienteering to the UK became a journalist and then head of general features at the BBC. He was also an innovator, designing a lightweight walking boot, while his sportswear store the Sweat Shop became the model for dozens of stores around the country. After the start of Brasher's greatest innovation, the London Marathon, he went on to become passion about horseracing. By the time of his death in 2003 he had eight horses in training. Brasher showed that steady determination, vision and enthusiasm could bring huge benefits not only to himself, but to the world.
WITH HER SIGNATURE STYLE, HER PHYSICAL ATHLETICISM AND HER DETERMINATION, SERENA WILLIAMS IS ONE OF THE GREATS OF THE TENNIS WORLD. HER STORY IS NOT ONLY ONE OF PERSONAL DRIVE, BUT OF TEAM WORK AND CLOSE PERSONAL ATTENTION FROM A FATHER DETERMINED TO HELP HER TO THE TOP." – BERNARDO MOYA
CHRIS BRASHER WAS INSTRUMENTAL IN HELPING OTHERS ACHIEVE THEIR GOALS AS WELL AS CREATING HIS OWN. HIS EASY ATHLETICISM, DRIVE AND INTELLIGENCE MADE HIM A FORCE TO BE RECKONED WITH WHOSE LEGACY LIVES ON AT THE LONDON MARATHON. – BERNARDO MOYA
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TIPS
MIKE CLAYTON SUSTAINABLE ORGANISATION
DEEP HEALTH
The Japanese principle of Five-S revolutionises workplaces. You can use it to make your own office space more effective. Three to focus on are Sort, Simplify and Standardise. Sort out what you will need from what you don’t use. Dispose of the latter – or archive it. Simplify your workplace by setting everything you will need in order, making the things you use most often easier to reach. Create a uniform, harmonious, standardised work space, with neat labelling, tidy files and a system that allows colleagues to quickly find what they need too. You may later go on to Shine it up regularly and Sustain your system, but habits start with small changes.
The three pillars of deep health are nutrition, rest and exercise. So office wellbeing requires that you pay attention to each of them. Scoffed lunches at your desk do little to refresh you, so take time out to eat your meal somewhere different, and to take your time over it. Keep water at your desk, where you can reach it when you want it and, from time to time, get up and walk around to keep the blood flowing and your posture lighter. Taking short breaks between tasks makes you more productive than if you just crack on from one to the next.
4 TIPS TO A HEALTHY PRODUCTIVE OFFICE
Dr Mike Clayton, author of bestsellers Brilliant Stress Management and Brilliant Time Management, tells The Best You that there are four essential principles to maintaining your wellbeing in the office.
PRODUCTIVE TIME
PRODUCTIVE TIME
The key to using your time is to know what matters most and prioritise it. Understand what creates your success and focus on one important thing at a time, letting go of the trivia. Use a flexible planning process, like the OATS principle, that daily – even several times a day – allows you to review the Outcomes that are most valuable, the Activities you need to carry out to achieve them, the Time you must allocate to each, and when to Schedule each activity to make best use of your time
The key to using your time is to know what matters most and prioritise it. Understand what creates your success and focus on one important thing at a time, letting go of the trivia. Use a flexible planning process, like the OATS principle, that daily – even several times a day – allows you to review the Outcomes that are most valuable, the Activities you need to carry out to achieve them, the Time you must allocate to each, and when to Schedule each activity to make best use of your time
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Wellbeing is too important to be left to chance. It makes the difference between efficiency and waste, success and failure, and happiness and a deep slough of depression and misery. It’s you choice; but luckily, the habits that will make that difference are easy to acquire.
THE BEST YOU
21ST CENTURY LIVING
THE BEST
YOU
The pace of change can sometimes bewilder, but also gives amazing opportunities to meet new people, discover new things and thrive. Bring out the best in you by discovering the latest innovations that will put you ahead of the pack.
Life Without Limits
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THINGS ARE LOOKING APP App enthusiast Rahul Gulati gives us the goodies in the world of mobile apps
COOKING WITH GAS Being environmentally friendly is a big part of 21st Century Living, and this month The Best You gives you some tips on being saving gas
21ST CENTURY LIVING
RAHUL GULATI
One doesn’t need to cite countless studies to prove how modern day lifestyle has taken a toll on our health, fitness and mental wellbeing. At the same time, mobile phones are getting smarter and have become an inextricable part of our lives. App enthusiast Rahul Gulati gives us the goodies.
Place your iPhone on the mattress while you sleep, specify a wake up phase (typically 30 minutes) and Sleep Cycle will wake you up when you are in a light sleep stage. Sleep Cycle is a smart alarm clock app that keeps track of your body movements. It comes loaded with various relaxing sounds and the “Statistics” feature allows you to monitor your sleep quality. Platform: iOS Price: £0.69
Measuring your heart rate has never been easier – just place your fingertip on the camera and Instant Heart Rate calculates it in a matter of few seconds. The paid version provides you with unlimited online storage, timeline, and worldwide trends. Platform: iOS, Android Price: Free
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THINGS ARE LOOKING APP
This app is a personal trainer in your pocket.
You begin workout by choosing from a set of drills that suit your need and intensity. It guides you with audio instructions, video demos and helps you keep track of your workout history and progress. Also, the app rewards you with specials like celebrity and athlete workouts for continual usage. Platform: iOS, Android Price: Free
The app helps you learn and prepare for a variety of everyday emergencies like heart attack, shocks, burns and many more through videos, quizzes, checklists and things to do. In an emergency, this app might prove to be a potential life-saver and it’s always good to have such apps on your phone. The content is preloaded, hence it works offline. Platform: iOS, Android Price: Free
RAHUL GULATI
21ST CENTURY LIVING
YOGIFY Yogify by Electronic Arts comes in handy for people at different levels of practicing yoga. Classes are split up into three levels, each focussing on strength, balance and flexibility. Programs are well explained through pose demos, photo illustrations, tips and benefits. The full package includes over 275 yoga poses and allows for customising background music. Platform: iOS Price: Free
Expectant parents would love this app for its daily advice and comprehensive week by week checklists that cover things to expect and a range of activities to be performed from two weeks into pregnancy till the baby is two weeks old. Additional features include due date calculator, access to a discussion forum and kick tracker to help catch a problem early. Platform: iOS, Android Price: Free The app helps in keeping a tab on your periods by allowing you to add notes, symptoms and moods. It marks period, fertile, ovulation and intimate days on the calendar and can predict the start date of next period. Additionally, users can specify custom symptoms, moods and export notes via email. Platform: iOS, Android Price: Free
DREAMBOARD Dreamboard helps create a journal by logging moods, emotions, colors, things you see and the roles you play in your dreams. It provides a dashboard to analyze, interpret and help you observe trends in your dreams over a period of time. Platform: iOS, Android Price: Free
NATURESPACE
Naturespace brings 3D sounds from different parts of the world that are recorded in natural surroundings and then optimized for a headphone experience. Six audio recordings help you unwind and are totally different from stereo sounds that we are used to listening. Platform: iOS, Android Price: Free
It’s a great app for both people looking to lose weight as well as fitness enthusiasts. It helps monitor calories consumed and burned by letting you maintaining a daily diary. Calorie counter boasts of a huge food database (over two million foods), generates daily and monthly reports and allows you to view updates in your social circle. Platform: iOS, Android Price: Free
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21ST CENTURY LIVING
THE BEST YOU
COOKING WITH GAS Another month, another issue, and another list of tips to help you save the environment, and some cash. This time The Best You brings you tips on saving one of the priciest resources when it comes to running a household – gas.
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THE BEST YOU
BE RADIATOR WISE
D
espite the fact that we can turn it on whenever we like, be it to cook a meal or get our living room to a balmy 20 degrees, gas is not a limitless resource. Natural gas is a naturally occurring hydrocarbon gas mixture, which is extracted and processed to make our lives more comfortable. Like all natural resources that the human population put exceptional amount of pressure on, it is bound to become scarcer and scarcer, making it more and more valuable and the prices sky-rocketing. In March of this year there was a gas shortage in the UK, which caused prices to reach an all time high, resulting in many people wrapped in blankets, teeth chattering as they drank hot chocolate and brandy to keep the cold at bay. If that is the result of just one gas line not working properly, imagine the pandemonium and teeth chattering that would happen if the world actually ran out of gas entirely. That’s why it’s important for us to cut back where we can, giving the earth a chance to produce the resources we have come to rely so heavily upon. Nobody is expecting you to give up your creature comforts, but there are little things that you can do to save gas that won’t impact your life at all. Cutting back on gas usage is easier than you think. We’ve come up with a few tips to help you get there.
QUICK TIPS • Fit double-glazing to reduce heat loss through windows. • Replace boilers older than 15 years old. Also, installing a new condensing boiler and controls could save you up to £235 a year. • Installing a hot water cylinder jacket could save you up to £35 a year.
Heating up your entire home takes quite a lot of gas, which can get rather expensive. Of course, now that it is summer, we are using the heating a lot less. But as you well know, even at this time of the year, there are still many cold and rainy days where we require a little help from our home heating systems when it comes to keeping toasty. However, there are a few things that you can do around your home that don’t require your radiators to work as hard as they have been up until now. Firstly, keep your radiators clear. This will allow the heat to reach the entire room. For example, do not put a large sofa in front of the radiator, as it will absorb a lot of the heat. Also, as you know, heat rises, so if you have particularly high ceilings, putting a shelf on the wall above the radiator will encourage the heat to travel to the middle of the room instead of just going up towards the ceiling.
COOL DOWN BELOW Heat escapes through the windows, doors and roof
It stands to reason that the higher you set your thermostat, the more gas you are going to use. So why not
21ST CENTURY LIVING try this nifty little trick? Next time you turn your heating on, lower the temperature by one degree. Then the next time, set it one degree lower still. Keep going until you feel too chilly, and then turn it back up by one degree. That way you will achieve the optimum temperature using the least amount of gas. Also, use your central heating timer to turn heating on and off instead of the thermostat. When you use your thermostat to turn the heating on and off, it always stays on a little bit, using a little bit of gas continuously, which adds up and bumps up your bill.
MAKE A DATE TO INSULATE Putting draft excluders around the doors and windows could save you around £25 a year on your heating bills. Also, don’t forget the small areas where the draft gets in, such as the letterbox and keyholes. Using letterbox covers and keyhole covers to will help minimise draft. Of course carpets and thick curtains will help with insulation, so you only need to put the heating on for a fraction of the time and allow the insulation to do the rest. And if you’re up for a little DIY, you can take the insulation of your home to the next level. Installing cavity wall insulation could save around £135 a year, while installing loft insulation could save around £175 a year.b
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WE SUPORT Challenge for Life
O
n 4 January 2010, just 11 days after she got engaged, Elise Roberts was diagnosed with a malignant melanoma. Nine months later, at the age of 37, Elise passed away. Due in no small part to Elise’s employers – Barclays – and her friends and colleagues, Elise for Life has achieved more than they ever could have hoped. Because of this, and the support there is for cancer related causes, Elise for Life is taking the appeal to the next level, and they are setting up a national cancer charity, Challenge for Life! This charity will raise money for organisations, charities, and individuals who need help and support across the whole cancer spectrum, covering awareness, prevention, research, treatment, care, and support. Challenge for Life aims to do this by offering incredible UK and Overseas Challenges. This means you will be able to take part in something life changing, not only for some very brave and amazing people, but for yourself too!
Set up by the late Elise Roberts in July 2010, Elise for Life aimed to raise money to help the hospital she was at with research, and the treatment, care, and support of so many people affected by cancer.
In the first year, they plan to support the likes of The Christie, The Royal Marsden, Macmillan, Marie Curie, Anthony Nolan, and Cancer Research UK, while supporting specific male, female, and children’s cancers on a regional and local level too. If you saw or heard about this years’ Comic Relief challenge, ‘Through Hell and High Water” then that should give you an idea of the types of challenges on offer. You could: • Paddle over 100kms down the mighty Zambezi River • Experience traditional dugout canoes, inflatable kayaks and rafts • Witness the awesome Victoria Falls – the smoke that thunders! • Possibly view wildlife including hippos, crocodiles and elephants • Camp by night on the banks of the Zambezi If that sufficiently whets your appetite, you now have the opportunity to follow in the footsteps… or should we say paddle strokes… of the six celebrities who took part in the Comic Relief challenge! b
OTHER WORTHY CAUSES WE SUPPORT National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children (NSPCC) www.nspcc.org.uk Katie Piper Foundation
10millionmetres
War Child
www.alexflynn.co.uk
www.warchild.org.uk
Teenage Cancer Trust
Sebastian's Action Trust
Children Of The Night
www.teenagecancertrust.org
www.sebastiansactiontrust.org
www.childrenofthenight.org
Johnson Beharry VC
Bosom Buddies UK
AThe Children’s Trust
www.johnsonbeharryvc.com
www.bosombuddiesuk.com
http://www.thechildrenstrust.org.uk/
www.katiepiperfoundation.org.uk
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Zambezi River Challenge! Join Challenge For Life for a once in a lifetime experience in Zambia and raise funds to help us with our ambition to conquer cancer.
On this exhilarating adventure you will paddle your way down one of the toughest rivers in Africa - the mighty Zambezi. This is your chance to see amazing African wildlife up close, wild camp under the stars on the banks of the Zambezi and raft beneath Victoria Falls - the smoke that thunders! • Paddle down the mighty Zambezi River • Experience traditional canoes, inflatable kayaks and rafts • Swim in rock pools underneath the spectacular Victoria Falls • View wildlife including hippos, crocodiles, antelope and elephants • Wild camp by night on sandy beaches on the banks of the Zambezi Join our amazing team of fundraisers on this stunning African river challenge. For more information and to register your interest:
enquiries@challengeforlife.org www.challengeforlife.org 0161 771 2040 Registered charity no. 1151867
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