The Best You March 2013

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March 2013

THE BEST

YOU

Life Without Limits

TM

✚ Do selF-Help BooKs really Help?

✚ penny poWer ViDeo inTerVieW

the Ford Factor

Top DesiGner TalKs To us


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CONTENTS

#TheBestYou

March 2013

Features 8 The Ford Factor

Top fashion designer Tom Ford tells The Best You how he goes from strength to strength

12 It's All About Relationships

Bernardo Moya interviews entrepeneur Penny Power about social networking

inner you 16

binge no More

18

Do self-help books really help?

20

Input, output and something in between

8

Hypnotist Debbie Williams gives tips to beat the compulsion to binge

The Best You looks at the benefits of personal development

Laura Spicer on how NLP can help you be better understood

enJoy liFe 24

what is t'ai chi?

26

your Feet are Made For walking

The Best You investigates the health-giving power of T'ai Chi

We look at the health and mental benefits of stepping out

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In prosperity our friends know us, in adversity we know our friends. John Churton Collins

Live love legacy 42 Which Celebrity Relationship Are You?

42

Ali Campbell profiles your Hollywood love-type

44 The Colour of Magic

Kay Cooke uses colour to bring about transformation

46 Selling the Family Business

Overcoming the heartache of selling the family business

Feel & look good 50 Chocolate - Can it really keep you

feeling and looking good?

How the cocoa bean came to dominate the world

52 Spring is in the Air

52

Nicky Hambleton-Jones on freshening up for spring!

54 Good food to make you smile

The Best You helps you decide what food is best for your teeth

Wealth & riches 56 Shine at that Interview!

Business leaders give advice to job seekers

58

The missing element to law of attraction Success doesn't just happen, you must act!

60 The Business of Self Help

Peter Hoppenfeld has spent many years advising the big names of personal development

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21 century living st

66 How to Create Effective Social Media

Arthur Partridge shows you how to make your social media work

68 Apple vs Android

Matt Wingett looks at brand semantics in the App War


EDITORIAL are we good friends?

I

wonder in these moments of “change and new times” - are we losing the value of friendship?

I have asked a few people recently and I do wonder if we are spending enough time talking, caring, nurturing, appreciating and helping our friends. Do you value yours enough? Are you losing friends? I mean your real friends, not your facebook friends. Friends are easier to find when we are younger and more difficult to keep when we are older. I think it's because we get so bogged down in work, family, money or other challenges - and we don’t seem to spend enough time focusing on our relationships or our friends. It’s now more important than ever that we stick together, that we hold on to our friends and help each other out. This month's interview with Penny Power shows the power of keeping and making new friends. When I say keep friends I am talking about good friends. We don’t need “emotional vampire” friends as Matt Wingett mentioned in our last issue.

Loyalty and being there when a friend needs you is the key! Dale Carnegie said: You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.

being loyal and reliable. Loyalty and being there when a friend needs you is the key! Sharing your concerns, your life, your work with friends will help you release stress, help you think more clearly... in a few words take the weight off your shoulders. So no excuses. Instead of saying “I haven’t got any money”, find money to enjoy your friends or meet at yours, his or hers. Instead of “I haven’t got time”, make time. Life’s too short and the last thing you need is regrets So at least weekly get on the phone, meet for a meal, go for a drink - be a friend!

All the best The bottom line is in order to have good Bernardo Moya friends YOU need to be a good friend. Some very basic tips are First, have a positive attitude. All people want to be friends with people who can make We want your stories life bearable instead of the opposite. The Best You is all about inspiring people. If you have a tale to tell that you think will Second, you must also be a help someone become the best they can be, person who likes to have fun. please tell us. Friendship is mainly about having fun, relaxing and taking it easy. Other good friendship tips are

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CONTRIBUTORS Ali Campbell

Kay Cooke

is one of the world's leading life coaches. He has built an enviable reputation as a highlymotivational coach, therapist, author and presenter. Dubbed "Tv's Mr Fix-it". He is a trusted advisor to celebrities, business leaders and even royalty around the world. @ali_campbell

lives in the north of England and works internationally to facilitate learning, develop creativity, and teach flexible thinking, adaptability and resilience in education, business and health. She has a special interest in working with children. @coookiebabe

Debbie Williams

Jo Haigh

is a NLP trainer, Hypnotherapist and Expert in Eating Disorders and Addictions from Birmingham. She runs online programmes to help with binge eating and weight loss as well as seeing clients one to one for this disorder. @FreeNLPHypnosis

has 20 years' experience of negotiating the sale of businesses (at last count 327 businesses sold) and four bestselling books under her belt so there's no denying she is a successful businesswoman. @fdscfs

#TheBestYou

Nicky Hambleton-Jones

Laura Spicer

Tamsan Garrie

Arthur Partridge

is a household name, a pioneer in reinvention and purveyor of reigniting one's youth and inner sparkle. She's at the forefront of the fashion and beauty industries, making it her business to find the best solutions to help women look and feel younger. @NHJStyle

is the leading authority on ‘Attraction’ in Business. She is best known for the significant transformation she makes with businesses through her unique approach to business growth. @TamsenGarrie

is the designated Trainer of Sound Communications for the Society of NLP and has been training people's speaking voices for over 20 years. The testimonials and results she gets speak for themselves.

is a Trainer, Master Practitoner of NLP, Personal Life and Business Coach with a special focus on social media. @aypee

The Best you Magazine Editor and Publisher Bernardo Moya Deputy Editor Associate Editor Technical Consultant Advertising Layout

David Saunderson

Icons in The Best You Magazine

Matt Wingett Martin Carter Carla Phipps carla.phipps@thebestyou.co Joanna Frackiewicz

The Best Group International 5 Percy St, London, United Kingdom, W1T 1DG Tel: +44 (0)845 230 2033 | www.thebestyou.co

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COvER STORY

Tom Ford

When it comes to style...

toM Ford is the Measure

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F

amed for his legendary design skills and his film directing talent, Tom Ford is a fascinating man who seems to make success wherever he goes. The Best You asks him about suits, success and his approach to life, design and art.

When he's not hobnobbing with James Bond icon Daniel Craig, looking after his other celebrity customers or thinking about what movie his production company will make next, Tom Ford has a serious passion - clothes and how to make people look and feel fantastic in them. Ford has boutiques in New York and Milan with dozens more planned around the world. They are fashioned like private homes with fireplaces, bars, butlers and even works of art from Ford’s personal collection. As Ford says of his designs: "In a world where things are increasingly disposable – where aesthetics are dictated by trend, and quality by ephemera – I wanted to create something of lasting value." He explains: "The key was to create a suit that was totally distinct in style as well as feel. It is very British, but with the lightness of hand of Italian tailoring. So, I call it a hybrid international style. It’s classic tailoring signatures combined with my design philosophy - they will never go out of style." His business ethos is not only about quality and style but also that little bit of magic that comes with the service ethos. "If you come to our store and want to buy a tailor-made suit, you can bring along the

things you carry on you, and we will make pockets for them in the right places. I try to make things for the customer." It's a far cry from his experiences in the elite bespoke tailors of Savile Row. Ford describes the Savile Row experience as rather basic. "I went to one of the best tailoring firms in existence There was a prevailing sternness there which I associated with being a child and having to see the school principal. The house has a certain way of cutting things and I would argue over the way I wanted my lapel, how roped I wanted my shoulder, or how fitted I wanted the silhouette to be." It is this that really distinguishes Ford's boutiques. "In today’s world we have lost the idea of service. We have so much of everything but without a human touch and a great attention to detail. In a world where service is increasingly automated and where we communicate more and more through our computers or over a phone, having an actual person help you and make sure everything is exactly as you would like it to be adds tremendous value to the experience of acquiring something new." His attention to personal connection in the customer experience has been central to his progress. That, and an unerring instinct for what is good for him. It could all have been so very different. As a teenager, he acted in some "bad tv shows", he admits. But even then he had the Midas touch, at one point appearing in 12 national tv advertisements in the US simultaneously, netting him hundreds of thousands a year. But one day, he decided to quit acting.

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COvER STORY

Tom Ford

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#TheBestYou

"Film is the most artistic thing I have ever done, really the "I hated being an actor because I wasn't in control. So I went back to school." He graduated in Architecture and then convinced Chloe in Paris that he should intern in fashion. “I took a load of sketches and said I was a Parsons grad,” Ford recalls. “Nobody asked what I’d actually graduated in.” This move eventually led him to become chief designer at Gucci. Thanks to Ford's vision and brilliance, the sleepy design house was overhauled into a $3 billion fashion force earning fans from Brad Pitt to Jennifer Lopez. Then, in 2005 he created the Tom Ford brand, launching his own fragrance and beauty collection, creating a luxury ready-to-wear line and made-to-measure accessories, footwear and clothing. If that weren’t enough, he made his film directorial debut with the critically acclaimed Oscar and Golden Globe nominated "A Single Man". He also designed for Daniel Craig, both on screen as James Bond and off.

"The key was to create a suit that was totally distinct in style as well as feel. It is very British, but with the lightness of hand of Italian tailoring. So, I call it a hybrid international style.

purest form of expression." He recalls of Craig: "I designed the costumes for Quantum of Solace. Daniel’s great: we’d been dressing him for a while. He knows exactly what he wants. We could not get him to wear studs with his tuxedo, for example. He wanted buttons. Having said that, it does not take a lot to make him look good. " With his desire to be in charge, it's no surprise that Ford also took up film directing. "Film is the most artistic thing I have ever done, really the purest form of expression." He admits that sometimes it was intense and frightening. "No matter how much you love something, there are those moments where you think, maybe I am just way out on a limb and other people are not going to feel this way. But then after the screening in venice, we had a standing ovation for ten minutes. It was very emotional, and it was just like a great release of 'yes, it spoke to other people.'" Tom Ford is a fascinating mixture. Sensitive to the needs of others, he is also very clear about what he wants. It's a fine balance. He has been accused of being unbending in his design of his suits because he intends to stay true to his vision. So it is that his own criticisms of Savile Row might be levelled also at him. An enigma and a genius, it is just what we come to expect of this fascinating man.b

TOM FORD At A Glance

• Born in 1961, in Austin, Texas • Dropped out of New York University to act • Studied architecture at Parsons Design School • Worked for a Chloe fashion house in Paris • Moved to Italy to design for failing fashion house, Gucci • Revived Gucci to become a major fashion house • Became creative director of Yves Saint-Laurent • Directed movie A Single Man • Set up his own Tom Ford designer brand w w w.thebestyou.co 11


FEATURE

PENNY POWER

#TheBestYou

it's all about relationships Penny Power, entrepreneur and social networking specialist reveals how businesses are built in the IT Age.

WaTCH penny poWer TalK To BernarDo Moya in THe BesT you ViDeo inTerVieW

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hen Penny Power was a girl, her parents paid a careers adviser to give her a psychometric test. She was advised to be a Butlins redcoat. Recalling the moment, this 48-yearold entrepreneur in the IT industry laughs and says: "Oh my God! I wonder, if I had taken that advice..." At school, she found she didn't fit in with the public school culture, or with the teachers, some of whom, at this ex-convent school, were "cruel" nuns. "I laughed a lot and that wasn’t acceptable!" she explains. She also didn't feel academically gifted, feeling more drawn to interacting with others. Then, after befriending a young boy with cerebral palsy she decided to become a physiotherapist. On leaving school and Sixth Form, she was accepted in to university in London to become a child psychologist. It was in her gap year as she was saving money that she was invited to apply for a job in telesales by a manager at vodafone who liked her friendly personality. But when she was sent on a telesales training course, she realised the telesales approach she was taught was not for her. "I used to just pretend to be on the phone," she admits. Then, one day she rang a client who had a terrible sore throat. She sympathised with him, and on her lunch break sent him a packet of Tunes cough sweets out of kindness. Two days later, she received a massive order. Her bosses were impressed. "They asked, how did you do it? and I said, I sent him a packet of Tunes!" It was then Penny realised sales were not

about scripts, but about what she had in spades - the ability to connect and build relationships. When she resigned to go to University that September, her boss persuaded her to stay on. By the age of 24, she was Sales and Marketing Director of another company with a £150 million budget. At that time she also met her husband Thomas, and when they had their first daughter together, she told him that she wanted to stop work and "Go back to my original roots of doing something to help people." Her following years saw her working as a volunteer at the Stroke Association. She went on to have two more children and applied herself to helping others. Then, one day she realised she was missing the business side of herself - and so was her husband. So, Penny became the first agent for Usborne Books, selling PCs into people's homes, and demonstrating how they could be used to educate children. In a short time, Penny had built a network of 650 agents. "What I learnt was the power of remote working. I learnt the power of building a network and creating training. Every Saturday I used to go to Richmond and anybody who wanted to recruit an agent would send them there and I would train them. I ended up creating a PowerPoint Presentation with a voiceover and a four hour CD training disc to send out to agents." All was going well until PC World started to undercut them. It was then that Penny decided to come out of the business and focus on her new child, TJ. During a discussion about e-commerce and the internet with her husband Penny told him,

"What I see as exciting about the internet is individuals being connected across the world and the opportunity for the growth of home working. Wouldn’t it be amazing to create a network online for homeworkers where they could talk to one another, inspire one another, share knowledge with each other, even

Digital Youth Academy Penny Power has been involved in the Digital Skills Agenda for 15 years and could see the skills gap emerging within businesses who all need to market into the social channels. In 2011, she created Digital Youth Academy and a brand new Apprenticeship for businesses to be able to recruit Born Digital Youths to set up and run their social media conversations. This is a really exciting trailblazing idea bringing the jobs of the future to businesses who know they want to be here in the future! Hiring an Apprentice is a fabulous way for businesses to expand their workforce. The terms of employment are very attractive, no NI, no PAYE and a minimum wage of £2.65. This gives a young person such a great opportunity and a fabulous qualification for their careers. You can recruit a young person, if you would like to know more check out here at : www.digitalyouthacademy.com/employer


FEATURE

PENNY POWER #TheBestYou

"At the end of the year of their apprenticeship they’ll have a qualification and a set of skills that will enable them to make the choice either to stay in employment or start their own business."

trade with one another across the world?” That was the birth of a whole new business: Ecademy. "It was born as a totally altruistic little thing I could do from home. Wouldn’t it be nice to support other people like me to learn how to do this?" Penny received a massive boost to her plans when an investor offered £250 million to develop the idea of Ecademy. As part of the deal, Penny ensured that she would be able to retain her autonomy to build the business and maintain her relationship with her children. "It grew and grew until we were in 200 countries with 650,000 members. It was fantastic and members paid £10 a month to join." As the market for social networks changed, with the advent of Facebook and LinkedIn, Penny found it increasingly hard to make the network stay profitable, and so last year she sold it. This was not the end of her involvement in IT and education. On the back of her experiences in the social networking world, she had written a book called “Know Me, Like Me, Follow Me” that attracted the attention of Mark Prisk, then Minister for Business, who invited her to advise him on digital content and strategies for businesses. It was both a validation and an opportunity. She compiled a Manifesto for Digital Business in Britain, advocating embedding

Penny values the relationships with her husband Thomas (right) and her children, Ross, Hannah and TJ (pictured below).

young people who have grown up as "IT natives" in businesses as apprentices and created an apprenticeship scheme which is now being licensed throughout the country and globally. "At the end of the year of their apprenticeship they’ll have a qualification and a set of skills that will enable them to make the choice either to stay in employment or start their own business." So what does business learn from her apprentices? A whole new way of thinking, it seems. "The culture of going online and being social means you have to be open, random and supportive to people. That’s a network thinking culture - the culture of being a friend online. Business people come from being closed, selective and controlling, so they come from opposite directions." Penny explains that being closed is more task driven, while being open is more relationship driven. And networking is how to build business. Coming from someone who discovered that a packet of Tunes can swing a major deal, it makes complete and utter sense. So what is it that Penny Power wants most of all? She thinks a moment, before answering: "That business people are more collaborative and supportive and loving towards one another." That's quite an aspiration! b

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Buy Penny Power's book "Know Me, Like Me, Follow Me: What Online Social Networking Means for You and Your Business" from www.thebestyou.co

Penny Power At A Glance

• Born in 1964 to a businessman • Did not "fit in" at school • Wanted to be a physiotherapist • By chance worked in telesales • Realised relationships were at the heart of sales • By 24 became a major marketing director • At 28 became a full-time mum • Ran a network of agents selling PCs • Started the Ecademy, one of the world's first social networks • Hopes to promote a more collaborative form of business


THE BEST

YOU

Inner you

Connect with the wonderful, special, powerful individual deep inside... Learn new ways to get your mind and body in balance and bring out the rich core of your being... With mind and body in balance, discover the secrets that will enable you to take charge of your Inner Life and become the Best You.

Life Without Limits

TM

Binge No More

Hypnotist Debbie Williams gives tips to beat the compulsion to binge

Do Self Help Books Really Help

The Best You looks at the benefits of personal development

Input,Output & Something in Between Laura Spicer on how NLP can help you be better understood

Tell us your inspirational story

Inspire others with your personal story of change. Email us at info@thebestgroupinternational.co w w w.thebestyou.co 15


INNER YOU: DebbIe wIllIaMs

Binge

no more! hypnotist debbie Williams g ives 7 tips to beat the compulsion to bing e... 16 w w w.thebestyou.co


#TheBestYou

Debbie Williams Debbie Williams is an NLP trainer, Hypnotherapist and Expert in Eating Disorders and Addictions from Birmingham UK

B

inge eaters consume large amounts of food that is often high fat, not because they are hungry but because it activates pleasure centres in the brain that numb negative emotions.

It's a common problem that can affect anyone. I've had to treat TV presenters, athletes, sports people, business owners, housewives - and even leaders of diet clubs! Rather than go on the yo-yo diet that involves starving yourself, falling off the wagon and then bingeing because you feel you've failed, here are my... ...7 Tips to Overcome Binge Eating

1. Plan ahead Have a simple written plan, where you can see what you are going to eat for the next 7 days including ‘treats’ every day. It might sound crazy, but I’ve had clients say when it has come to their 4pm chocolate treat that sometimes they feel ‘I don’t want it’ which is empowering and tells me they are mastering a lean person’s strategy.

2. Ask the right questions Ask yourself: “If I eat this how will it feel over time?” Think through the consequences of your choice, so if you need to you can swap some of the foods on your plan with the surprise piece of birthday cake, or have fruit at 4pm instead of the bag of crisps which was today’s treat. It’s what naturally lean, healthy happy people do all the time with no effort because they instinctively know if I eat too much of this I will feel, A, stuffed, B, tired, C, ill D, bloated and uncomfortable.

3. Learn from the best Imagine stepping into a lean, healthy happy person's shoes for the day. If they were in charge of your thoughts today how do they feel and act around food?

4. Enjoy your treat It’s a reward and a pleasure so take the time to connect and feel satisfied. I’ve had a client say her flat mate makes her one cream egg an almost orgasmic experience! Make it a ritual to focus on eating, tasting and enjoying food, then forget about it and get on with your life!

5. Celebrate success Keep a success journal of positive things you notice. This will be your best resource when times are hard to help you stay on track.

6. NLP Use NLP and hypnosis to help you - whether it’s through having sessions, learning it yourself or listening to self-help recordings, Many studies have shown good hypnosis can really help you succeed.

7. Accept your set backs Rather than bingeing continually when you “fall of the wagon”, just acknowledge your setback, change what you are eating and keep going. After all, if you lost a few pounds over the last few weeks and then you ate a massive meal, how is the last few weeks a failure?!?! Keep going and you will develop the habits of a slim person, rather than keeping on in the same old patterns as before!

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INNER YOU: the best you

#TheBestYou

do self help Books really help? I

t's a provocative question, but recent research shows what people in the self help world have known for some time: Making the effort to invest in yourself really can have a positive effect. recent research by the scottish nhs shows that prescribing books really can make a difference. Focussing specifically on cognitive behavioural therapy (cbt), the study revealed that those patients given self-help books, as well as the normal standard treatment for depression had lower levels of depression a year later. the study, performed with more than 200 people also included three sessions with a guide, who helped the patient to engage with the book, and aid them with the design of their care plan. although it's not for everyone, the ramifications for the health service and for patients is massive. For the taxpayer it saves money, being a cheap and efficient way of helping to treat depression. but perhaps more importantly for the patient, being able to take power over your life points the way forward.

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"WE ASKED OUR READERS WHAT SELF-HELP BOOKS THEY WOULD RECOMMEND..."

The 7 Habits Of Highly Effective People By Stephen R Covey This is one of the most informative books that has made a massive change in my life. I haven't managed to incorporate all of its wisdom into my life, but the advice "Seek first to understand then be understood" part has proved very useful! William (Musician)

Self-esteem AfďŹ rmations:

Feel The Fear & Do It Anyway By Susan Jeffers I was terrified of doing presentations, but this book made me enjoy the fear. It made a massive difference and now I don't think twice about speaking in public! Amanda (Writer)

Easy Way to Stop Smoking: Be a Happy Non-

Motivational Affirmations for Building Confidence and Recognizing Self Worth By Louise Hay

Smoker for the Rest of Your Life By Allen Carr

Not a book but a CD! I don't know many proffesional therapists who at some stage over past 25 years have not been guided by Louise Hay." You can heal your life" she has the best listings available for metaphysical affirmations....

I tried so many ways to give up smoking. Patches, drugs, doing cold turkey. None of it worked. Then in a desperate attempt to stop, I read Allen Carr's book. That was it. I haven't touched a cigarette since!

Lezley (Therapist)

Zella (Teaching Assistant)

Change Your Life In 7 Days By Paul McKenna This was a great book for helping me to get my life back on track. I was low in confidence, depressed and simply "bumping along the bottom" until I got hold of this book. I listened to the CD repeatedly and did the exercises over and over again. It made a huge, positive impact on my life! Matt ( Delivery Driver)

As A Man Thinketh By James Allen This was such a profound read for me. Every other sentence of this book/essay, I had to stop, re-read it a few times, and reflect on exactly what it meant. An eye-opener! Amy (Student)

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INNER YOU: laura sPIcer

FREE DOWNLOAD Improve your Voice report from laura spicer

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#TheBestYou

AND SOMETHING IN BETWEEN


#TheBestYou

“The words you choose are crucial. There is a difference when somebody says they feel happy or they feel ecstatic! “

laura spicer Voice specialist Laura Spicer explains how NLP can help you be better understood

I

am often asked what NLP is and what I do as an NLP consultant and voice Coach.

As with any tool that has myriad uses, it's difficult to describe in few words. How would you describe what a car is to someone who'd never seen one? You could say it's to get you to the shops but a car has many other useful functions. You could mention others, like taking your kids to school, but a car is for so much more. I am old enough to remember when computers first became available to the public. I asked someone who had one why I might find one useful. He told me I could keep phone numbers on it and I wondered why that was an improvement on my filofax. NLP has such a broad application that it impacts every aspect of every moment of every day. I wouldn’t have survived the difficult challenges of the recent years without it. And I also wouldn’t have had as much fun and joy either. I can’t imagine how anyone copes without it! I sent both my children to learn from Richard Bandler once they were 18 and I knew it was the best thing to prepare them for as healthy, happy, productive and successful a life as possible. One model that has been found to be useful

in NLP is something called ‘chunking’. A big chunk is something which is more abstract and inclusive and a small one more specific. Woman is a smaller chunk description than People. So the title of this article is one big chunk description of what NLP does . Data is inputted from the outside world through the senses. Even a so-called sixth sense is informed by what has been seen, heard, smelled, tasted and touched. Output refers to our behaviours. And we call some of what happens in between thinking. The way we speak (‘output’) can convey a huge amount of information to a listener. The words you choose are crucial. There is a difference when somebody says they feel happy or they feel ecstatic! But there is much more to it than ‘just’ the words themselves. In fact, research says (though please take the statistics with a healthy pinch of salt!) the words only convey 7% of the message. Right now, you are reading my words but if you were listening to me saying them you may get a lot more information from my voice quality and tones and tunes. And if you could see me too, then you would have more information again. I called a friend today and all she said was ‘hello’ but I knew immediately that she was in a hurry and stressed. Just from the way she

said that one word! Did she mean to convey that? Perhaps, but again, perhaps not! One of my roles is to help people to convey their message in the way they want it to be heard. If they are giving a talk at work and want it to inspire the team, are they using their tones and tunes as effectively as possible? Actually, it is simple to learn how to increase your success rate massively in all verbal communications by learning how to use your voice more elegantly. When I woke up this morning I thought to myself “I need to get this article written” and I began to feel anxious. I am so glad I caught myself before I suffered for long! I changed my internal voice tone to sound relaxed and changed the words in my head to “it might be fun to write this article” and abracadabra! I started to feel motivated instead of worried. Simple, but amazingly effective! I hope it has been fun to read as it has been to write and that your interest is piqued enough to want to find out more...

• Buy Laura Spicer Voice Power DVDs from www.thebestyou.co

recommended reading deidre Bounds Fulfilled

 Have you ever said "There's got to be more to life than this"?

The Best You website is packed with loads of great books, DvDs, CDs, downloads, free articles and reports. Check it out now: www.thebestyou.co

richard Wiseman 59 seconds

 How Psychology Can Improve Your Life in Less Than a Minute. Find out why putting a pencil between your teeth instantly makes you feel happier.

sonia choquette trust your vibes

 The secrets you need to awaken your intuitive voice and trust your vibes.

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THE BEST

YOU

enJoy lIFe

Laughter, sport, humour, travel, love, dedication, joy - these add the sparkle that makes life worth living. Climbing a mountain, giving to others, starting a family, embracing life... What are the things you wish you had done, but haven’t yet? Life is no rehearsal - find ways to enjoy it, whenever you can!

Life Without Limits

TM

t'ai chi

The Best You investigates the health-giving power of T'ai Chi

your Feet are Made For walking We look at the health and mental benefits of stepping out

Tell us your inspiraTional sTory

inspire others with your personal story of change. email us at info@thebestgroupinternational.co w w w.thebestyou.co 23


#TheBestYou

Enjoy Life: The Best You

What is T'ai Chi? T

T'ai Chi is a great man things ... The Best You Investigates

ai Chi Chuan is an ancient Chinese martial arts system that is also a gentle form of relaxing exercise. It's that graceful set of slow, flowing moves one sees on films and in real life in parks around the world wherever the Chinese live. Although the martial art is much older, T'ai Chi Chuan was first named as such in the mid-1800s when a member of the Chinese Imperial Court witnessed a demonstration of its use in a fight by a master of the art. It can be translated in a number of ways as "supreme ultimate fist", "great extremes boxing" or "boundless fist". It is usually referred to in the West simply as T'ai Chi, rather than T'ai Chi Chuan. 24 w w w.thebestyou.co

First developed 400 years ago by families in China it was previously known in China as "soft boxing" and was considered one of the more obscure martial arts. Although it can be used for self defence, many people who practise T'ai Chi don't use it to fight, but as a kind of physical meditation. Its positive effects on both mind and body are well documented, including: • increased powers of focus and concentration • stress relief • inducing of meditative brain processes • enhanced balance • greater flexibility • improved circulation

• strengthening of bone • greater co-ordination • general feelings of well-being Adherents of the Chinese approach to health also believe that T'ai Chi builds a healthy balance of "Chi Energy", the life force that permeates the universe and everything that exists within it. That's why those who go further into T'ai Chi are often associated with leading a healthy lifestyle - including vegetarianism or reduced meat intake, an interest in Chinese herbalism and a love of exercise, fresh air and nature. You may be wondering how those slow movements you see practitioners making in the parks can translate to a martial art? T'ai Chi is described as an "internal" martial art,


meaning that the main focus when learning the moves is on the movement of Chi Energy around the body and the precise application of the moves in a deeply relaxed state. The whole purpose of this approach is to make the body relaxed and receptive when the martial art is being used. Being able to maintain a relaxed mental state when under pressure is, after all, a useful skill! Remember though, T'ai Chi is applied as a martial art with speed and force, using the same forms that have been perfected in slow motion to either defend or attack. Its underlying principle of T'ai Chi is to be aware of the weight distribution and balance of your opponent. Rather than meeting force with force, one learns to redirect, avoid and turn force against the opponent. Across the world today, there are millions of people practising T'ai Chi. Its beneficial effects on health mean that it is taught in hospitals, clinics and community centres. Many older people find its gentle discipline enlivening and energising and fantastically good for mental control. Some people even learn it because of its aesthetic appeal!

DID YOU KNOW: T’ai Chi Chuan’s gentle movements burn more calories than surfing and nearly as many as downhill skiing?

• The Best You stocks a selection of great T'ai Chi books

First developed 400 years ago by families in China it was previously known in China as "soft boxing" and was considered one of the more obscure martial arts

T'ai Chi and Health good for

• recovery from chronic stroke • remedial treatment for heart failure • high blood pressure • multiple sclerosis • Parkinson's disease • Alzheimer's disease • Fibromyalgia • depression • pain • fatigue • insomnia w w w.thebestyou.co 25


Enjoy Life: The Best You

Your feet are made for walking...

The Best You looks at the health and mental benefits of stepping on out and walking to fitness and creativity..

K

eeping fit needn’t be a chore. In fact, raising your fitness level, getting your heart beating faster and flooding your mind and body with a sense of wellbeing can be as easy as putting one foot in front of the other. Walking can be a fascinating and enjoyable way to get to know the place you live, enjoy the countryside, explore new places and meet people. Getting out into daylight and raising the heart-rate can have hugely beneficial effects. In a recent study, the British Heart Foundation discovered that people who walk briskly for half an hour a day reduce the risk of heart attack by 40 per cent. Meanwhile, another study showed that contact with nature on a country walk

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powerfully reduces stress levels. The secret ingredient, scientists say, is the greenery. There’s even a name for a lack of it - “Nature Deficit Disorder”. But that’s not all. The steady rhythm of walking can have a powerful positive psychological effect. None other than the great poet William Wordsworth found a walk in the countryside a powerful tonic for composing poems. Throughout his life, Wordsworth continued to pace, finding the rhythm of his stride repeated in his poems. It has been estimated that Wordsworth walked 180,000 miles in his life. It certainly did him no harm, living as he did to the grand old age of 80. The focusing and calming effect of walking


Walking Meditation how to do it: Give yourself 10-20 minutes to do the following • Step outside the door and walk steadily and deliberately, focusing your attention on your foot as it touches the ground.

• If your thoughts begin to wander, acknowledge whatever thought appears in your mind, but then gently redirect your attention to your feet.

• Relax your body and your shoulders, allowing your arms to swing naturally

• If you are in a busy environment or near a road, do of course pay attention to what is going on around you to some extent, but keep the steady rhythm of walking at the forefront of your mind.

• As you shift your weight forward, transfer your attention to the other foot, noticing how this touches the ground and your weight is transferred. • Again, as you move forwards, shift your attention gently to the next step.

• After 10 minutes or so, you will find that your mind has begun to clear and that you are feeling more relaxed.

Walking facts Composer J S Bach once walked 260 miles to hear famous organist Buxtehude perform. The 20-year-old then walked b ack c ar r y ing manus cr ip t copies he had made of the organist’s playing.

has been taken to an extreme in the meditations of Buddhists, who use steady pacing to slow the mind and disentangle it from the “veil of illusion” they believe brings human suffering. Walking meditation is used by many Buddhists to reach mindfulness - a calm and relaxed awareness that is detached from deep emotions. Whether you walk for fitness, for enjoyment, or sociability, for nature appreciation - or to write a masterpiece, the great advantage of walking is that you just have to step outside your door. Of course, it is wonderful to walk in the countryside, but a decent pair of shoes and the right clothes mean you can enjoy this health-giving pastime anywhere. So, the next time you consider jumping in the car to take a 5 minute journey, think again.

None other than the great poet William Wordsworth found a walk in the countryside a powerful tonic for composing poems.

George Meegan is famous for his unbroken walk of the entire Western Hemisphere with no special equipment and financial backing. His self-published book, The Longest Walk: The Record of Our World’s First Crossing of the Entire Americas, tells of the entire voyage from Tierra del Fuego, South America in 1977 to Prudhoe Bay, Alaska in 1983. He concluded his walk to Barrow in 2002 summing up the total distance of his journey to 19, 0919 miles in 2,425 days. Brisk walking is good for the heart and for stamina, while walking with care and attention with a slow steady movement is helpful to building mental focus. w w w.thebestyou.co 27


#TheBestYou

ENJOY LIFE: nIa Jones

KATIE COUNTS ON OUR SUPPORT. CAN WE COUNT ON YOURS? Teenage Cancer Trust is the only UK charity dedicated to improving the quality of life and chances of survival for young people between the ages of 13 and 24 who have cancer. We rely completely on donations to fund our vital work. Nothing we do would be possible without the generosity and support of people like you.

GET IN TOUCH TODAY TO FIND OUT HOW YOU CAN GET INvOlvED.

www.teenagecancertrust.org You can also stay in touch online: www.facebook.com/teenagecancertrust www.twitter.com/teenagecancer 28 w w w.thebestyou.co

Teenage Cancer Trust is a registered charity: 1062559 (England & Wales); SC039757 (Scotland)


THE BEST

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booK reVIews

Life Without Limits

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Great reading, viewing and listening to empower,entertain, enrich, delight and enhance. The Best You rounds up classics and new books and media products that will make such a positive difference in your life

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BOOK REvIEWS

the body you Deserve Anthony Robbins One of the great problems with the weight loss industry is the way it produces a feeling of learned helplessness in people who repeatedly lose weight for a few months and then pile it back on again. That's why Anthony Robbins doesn't think there's a "right way" to lose weight, or the "perfect diet", or that the latest fad will be any different in the long term from the one before. From years of experience of working with people to beat their weight problems, Robbins knows that weight loss comes down to your beliefs, conditioning and personal standards. These are the focus of Robbins's intensive and highly effective weight loss course - The Body You Deserve. For many people, overeating is an addiction which expresses events in their conditioning from childhood. For others, poor food management is just part of "who they are" and changing what goes in without changing the person will bear very little fruit. In the 10 audio CDs Robbins has prepared for you, you get to discover how to break out of your conditioning and create the person you want to be, from the inside out. Robbins is a highly effective agent of change, whose effect on quite literally millions of people through his books, CDs, seminars and DvDs is well recorded. This CD set takes a steady, measured and realistic course to making the changes you need to beat your weight issues. Forever.


#TheBestYou

“...Robbins knows that weight loss comes down to your beliefs, conditioning and personal standards.�


BOOK REvIEWS

rich Dad Poor Dad Robert Kiyosaki Robert Kiyosaki's great piece of advice that rings true throughout his self-help classic is simple: In the West we are trained in all sorts of things at school, but we aren't trained how to understand money. He makes his point in the early pages of the book by comparing his "poor dad" father (who never quite managed to make ends meet during Robert's childhood growing up in Hawaii) with that of a friend whose "rich dad" father was a millionaire. Kiyosaki points out the differences between the two fathers' attitudes, and discovers that while the poor and middle classes work for money, the wealthy make money work for them. He is keen to get you thinking about money in two particular ways: do the things you own act as liabilities are as assets? His definitions for each are clear - "During hard times assets feed you, and liabilities eat you". Much of this book seeks to address particular attitudes that we have developed in the West towards money, seeking to turn the reader into an active creator of money rather than a passive receiver of wages. It asks serious questions about your relationship with money and toward its end gives a clear set of checklists as to how to go about getting the Rich Dad mentality. With over 26 million copies sold, there's no doubt a powerful message in this book. This book is most definitely worth investing in. Your new attitude to money could indeed turn out to be your number one asset.

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#TheBestYou

“With over 26 million copies sold, there's no doubt a powerful message in this book. “ w w w.thebestyou.co 33


BOOK REvIEWS

Men are From Mars, women are From Venus John Gray There are a few books that receive "classic" status when they are first published, and John Gray's Men Are From Mars, Women Are From venus was just such a book. From the clever title that implies how the mindsets of so many men are alien to so many women, and vice versa, through its homespun observations about the way that these two alien civilizations interact, the metaphor is a useful tool to unpick male/female relationships. Of course, the book doesn't apply to everyone. Putting forward the idea that men are just naturally more competitive than women, or that women are naturally more collegiate in their approach to stress than men is bound to bring up dissent and argument. And yet, somehow, the book throws up truths about relationships that has made it a multi-million seller, and helped untold people bring perspective to their relationships. Perhaps it is simply because the book highlights the fact that people think differently from each other, that they process information differently and react differently in the same situations that has brought about its success. Sociologists and geneticists may well argue about how "true" Gray's observations are, yet, at some level, what he says does seem to hold water. Whatever the case, Gray manages to encourage us to recognise our difference from each other, and to do our best to understand the other. For that, he must be commended. That is why this book is a classic.

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#TheBestYou

“The book throws up truths about relationships that has made it a multi-million seller”

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BOOK REvIEWS

total recall Total Recall Arnold Schwarzenegger has come a long way from his roots as a farmer's boy in Thal, Austria in the 1960s. From winning the title of Mr Universe, moving to Los Angeles, starring in Conan The Barbarian before going on to star in some of the most popular ďŹ lms of the 80s and 90s to finally becoming Governor of the America's wealthiest state, Arnie's career has been no short of extraordinary. What comes out in this book is how none of this happened by accident. Schwarzenegger reveals himself to be an extremely driven man. The habits of mind that brought him success later in life were present in his early childhood and have stood him in good stead ever since. Also revealing is not only his extreme intelligence, but his cold and calculating edge. These traits come through as he describes the ways in which he attempted to outthink his competitors in the world of bodybuilding, playing psychological games with them so that they considered him to be their superior. From his early days training in a gym in Portsmouth to his governorship, Arnie has plotted his rise, and for anyone wanting to learn how to think with big ambitions, this book is great. It has its problems. Arnie is honest about his abuse of steroids in his early years, and the serious health problems they give him in later life. He talks about his affairs and his love-child with clear-sightedness. What comes through from his story is how to think like a winner, and what it means to really chase after your goals. In this at least, there is plenty for the ambitious person to learn from. A fascinating read that reveals how brawn isn't the only thing Schwarzenegger should be respected for.

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#TheBestYou

“Arnie is honest about his abuse of steroids in his early years, and the serious health problems they give him in later life.� w w w.thebestyou.co 37


BOOK REvIEWS

ellen Macarthur Full Circle It's clear from reading this book that Ellen MacArthur is one of those unique people who pours her heart and soul into everything she does. From the vendee Globe yacht race that propelled her to international recognition at the age of 24, through her subsequent attempts at the West-East transatlantic crossing, dismasting and capsize, to her securing of the world record for a solo circumnavigation of the world, Ellen MacArthur does nothing by halves. In this book, a fascinating mixture of autobiography and travel book, Ellen takes you with her around the world, describing the hardships and triumphs, the lows and the highs of her amazing career. She talks about her struggle to come to terms with media attention, her friendships with some of the world's greats (among whom she is to be numbered) and her concerns for the environment. There is no doubt, after reading this intense account of her life and her sporting achievements that MacArthur was destined for greatness. Now that she has retired from professional yachting the journey goes on in a different way. Her commitment to charity work and to environmental projects receives exactly the same treatment as her determination to win glory alone on the world's oceans. For anyone seeking to know how to really take on the world and win, this young woman's story is deeply inspirational - and all the more incredible for one so young.

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#TheBestYou

“A fascinating mixture of autobiography and travel book, Ellen takes you with her around the world�

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BOOK REvIEWS

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THE BEST

lIVe loVe legacy

YOU

What do you want to be remembered for? What are your relationships like with those around you? How does life treat you - and how do you treat your life? There is so much good in you. Enrich your life with the passion you feel and the connections you make.

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which celebrity relationship are you? Ali Campbell's quiz tells you which celebrity you most resemble

the colour of Magic

Kay Cooke describes how she uses colour to bring about transformation

selling the Family business Selling the family business can cause heartache, says Jo Haigh

Tell us your inspiraTional sTory

inspire others with your personal story of change. email us at info@thebestgroupinternational.co w w w.thebestyou.co 41


LIvE LOvE LEGACY: alI caMPbell

#TheBestYou

Which celebrity relationship are you? It’s Friday night and your man calls you from work saying his meeting ran late and he’s not going to make the film you were planning to see, do you a) b) c) d) e)

Drive to his office and sit outside the meeting until he is done. Take another guy friend, to teach him a lesson. Immediately get on the phone to you girlfriends and explain he’s def having an affair. Demand he finishes the meeting early to meet you on time. Call the cinema and book a later showing. Summer holiday time is approaching and you’ve been dreaming of a summer beach getaway all year. But your man is an adventure buff and wants to go hiking. What do you do?

a) b) c) d) e)

Hide his passport and miraculously ‘find’ it again shortly before your planned beach trip giving him no time to organise another trip Assume it’s because he wants to check out other sporty types so book a girlie holiday and decide you will def pull Presume it's because he doesn’t want to be seen with you in a bikini Book the beach holiday, he knows he has no choice Choose a destination that has both the beautiful beaches and the adventure trips, use the opportunity to try something new!

It’s your ‘quarter anniversary’ but a premier league match is on at the pub. He announces he wants to watch the game. Do you: a) b) c) d) e)

Sit at his side the entire game, only allowing him space for bathroom breaks. Go to the pub, but spend 90 minutes chatting up the fit guy at the bar. Sit at home and mope. Enforce an absolute ban, no pub, no mates, no footie Suggest a late dinner or drinks after the game where you can have his full attention

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A new scantily clad Cheryl Cole music video pops on Tv and he doesn’t immediately look away. Your response? a) b) c) d) e)

Switch the Tv off Scream about why he’d rather watch that than look at you Shut yourself in the bathroom and sob Force him to give you 10 reasons as to why he’d rather be with you than her Laugh it off- he’s got a snowball’s chance in hell anyway! It’s coming up to his birthday and you want to plan something special, he however is happy to go for a drink in the pub. You

a) b) c) d) e)

a) b) c) d) e)

Whinge until he does what you want to do Tell him fine, the pub sounds great then dress up in your skimpiest outfit, flirt with his friends and glare at any woman within a 10 metre radius Accept that he doesn’t want to spend any quality time with you and leave him to get hammered with the lads Book something anyway, then call each and every one of his friends telling them to back off from the birthday weekend Do both! Remember it’s his birthday and he’s entitled to do what he likes, but suggest what you’d like to do and built it into the day, too! You’re out at a restaurant with a group of mutual friends, and the waitress has that cute girl- next- door thing going on. You’re convinced your man is ogling her. Do you Drape your arms around his neck ready for some serious PDA next time she brings the drinks over Have a loud, indiscreet slanging match with your man then call her an appropriate swear word before flouncing out. Order the biggest burger and fries on the menu whilst silently admitting you’d never look that good in an apron Demand that you all have to leave the restaurant as the staff are not up to scratch You enjoy your food, the drinks and the company, because you know you’re the one going home with him - everyone looks now and again


Find out your strengths and weaknesses in relationships with dating expert Ali Campbell. His fun questions about the way you react in relationships will not only reveal which celebrity you compare to in love, but also gives some serious advice about how to bring more harmony to your (and his) life! Here are a few tips from top celebrity Life coach and hypnotherapist Ali Campbell, AKA the UK’s ‘Mr Fix It’ on combating negative thought processes and maintaining the positives that will not only pick up our spirits but also help keep us happy in our relationships. If you have answered mostly...

Your ‘celebrity relationship type’ is that of Hollywood crusader Angelina Jolie. Ali's Advice Stop telling yourself horror stories about what will happen if you relax your grip a little. Relationships are like a handful of water. The tighter you try to hold on the more you lose, as you squeeze it between your fingers. Hold on to your man lightly, the real secret to him not leaving is simply in you being the person he wants to hang out with.

You're closest to UK shock-wave Katie Price AKA Jordan Ali's Advice: Think about what you're doing. If you think feeling good rests in the attentions of a random bloke, then the source of your happiness is outside of you… That makes you Girl Power-less!

You are close to one half of British entertainment Royalty, victoria Beckham. Ali's Advice Focus on attraction vs containment. Try letting him fly a bit and trust that he will come back to you. If you want to attract wildlife into your garden you could A - build a cage, stock it with animals and then spend your time trying to stop them escaping, or B – create an environment that wildlife wants to hang out in. if you ever doubt this just try keeping blackbirds away from your Raspberries! You're type is closest to the partnership formed by Will and Jada Pinkett- Smith Ali's Advice

Hello Brittney Spears! Ali's Advice

Keep your thoughts at bay and trust that all you have to do to keep him is just be you. When you being you and him being him naturally makes the other happy then you have it cracked… if that’s not the case you’re probably in the wrong relationship in the first place.

If you are lacking self esteem and trying to please everyone else for validation it is important to check in with who you really are. The average person has 6 close friends and there are 6,910,000,000 people on the planet. Take the pressure off, It’s a fair bet that whoever you ‘really’ are you can find 6 who like you just for being you.

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LIve love Legacy: Kay Cooke

The Colour of Magic Kay Cooke Kay Cooke lives in the north of England and works internationally to facilitate learning, develop creativity, and teach flexible thinking, adaptability and resilience in education, business and health. She has a special interest in working with children.

Education expert Kay Cooke knows many creative ways to facilitate changes in people. Here she describes how she uses colour to bring about transformation.

S

itting at traffic lights a few days ago, I remembered a seven-year-old called Adam whose rage I had helped to manage by associating his feelings with colours. We're conditioned early on to build associations in this way. For example, even as I type this article, my mistakes are underlined in red - and teachers mark mistakes in red, too. We even talk about "seeing red" when we get angry or frustrated. Then there's that traffic light stopping us. From early on, we learn to associate that particular colour with being stopped and with frustration. I often use a traffic light analogy when working with children to help them think about their thoughts, feelings and subsequent behaviour. Here are some ways we think about it.

Red- stop, stuck or danger. Green- start, go ahead, calm, nature. Orange/Amber - state of flow with time for choices. Adam would get stuck in a tantrum for around 45 minutes and not know how to get out of it. Together, we explored new ways to handle his behaviour through the traffic light analogy.

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#TheBestYou Chatting about things that made him angry, sad or mad, I encouraged Adam to feel those feelings before he drew them. This is what he came up with.

Then we discussed his orange thoughts, which he decided were his "little helpers" - explorers of smart ideas and possibilities. He told me these little guys even made sounds like working on a computer keyboard!

Unprompted, he decided that red represented his angry brain, green was the colour of his happy brain and orange was the colour of his helper brain that could un-stick his feelings.

Next, I swiftly moved him out of his bad feelings by playing with our dogs. I even persuaded him to get rid of his negative "red brain" feelings by handing them over to our dog, Oscar, which caused him to laugh a lot. That's a much more useful emotional state! Now I prompted Adam to remember having fun and feeling proud of his behaviour. He drew these expressions:

Cut out and laminated, these images became useful resources during our work together. We used them in many ways, for example: 1. Flash Cards – we acted out a sequence of feelings to train Adam into awareness of his moods, and to encourage more control. 2. Splat – we acted out the feelings as we took the green card and SPLATTED it on top of the red, to squash it, with a big "splat" noise. This metaphor uses sound, sight and action to generate a sense of control in Adam. 3. Squish – we talked about a difficult and unresolved red issue and then took the orange card and SQUISHED it (ie. gave it a side-to-side movement) on top of red. Next, we took take 3 deep calming breaths and blew each out onto the orange card. On the last out-breath, we gently placed the green card on top. 4. Visualisation – by closing his eyes and imagining each of these activities, we firmly imprinted the processes onto his mind’s eye. It seems so very simple - and that's how it works. Behavioural change really does happen in an instant. Adam’s mum wrote to me some months later delighted to report he'd had no further tantrums. Some people say it’s just like magic – it can certainly be fun, too!

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LIve love Legacy: Jo Haigh

SELLING THE FAMILY BUSINESS Jo Haigh Jo Haigh says selling any business can cause heartache. But it’s worse when it comes to selling a family business...

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hen it comes to selling your business, one factor to be ready for is the matter of time. Bear in mind that however long you think it will take, it will take twice as long. It's certainly no longer unusual to take up to 12 months, meaning a deal can roll on and all the while you have your day job to do!

The starting point You could be forced to sell because you have no heirs, but poor or great performance may present opportunities or options that mean exit is the only route. Â

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Debbie Williams DID YOU KNOW: ď‚&#x; "Family firms account for two in three private sector enterprises in the UK economy - 3 million firms"

Things to Do:

1 Check your shareholders agreement. Can you sell with or without all parties' consent?

2 Value: do all parties agree on minimum figures? Get professional guidance on this. You cannot second-guess value. I have sold businesses where I have had offers ranging from ÂŁ1m to ÂŁ5m for the same company. 3 Who is going to do what in the process? From an internal point of view, you will be beauty-parading to various buyers. You need your best salespeople on show as well as your best money man or woman. These may or may not be family members, 4 Get your house in order, including your books, records, customer and employment contracts. Get rid of, or at least be aware of, any nasties. 5 Be 1,000, 000% certain you are committed to the sale at completion. You may feel guilty and hugely remorseful. Selling can be a painful experience. One experience I had with a business was when two brothers had no heirs to hand their second generation business on to. They sold it to a business that was then taken over by a large multinational just before the sale was completed.

Knowing they were selling to a corporation that didn't share their values was a terrible dilemma. But they had committed to getting out, and had already spent much of the money and laid new plans. That sale haunted them for years afterwards, especially when the business was absorbed into that of the faceless corporation. Their mum and dad never let them forget it. The process The process of selling is a full-time job. You can do this yourself, but be prepared for a lot of work! Also be aware that if you take your eye off the ball throughout this process and the deal falls through, you may not be able to go back to the same business.

2 Keep a private life. A sensible personal life is essential to maintain your sanity, so steer away from Sunday lunch table debates. 3 Have an essential list of no compromises, about 1/2 dozen items and no more. For example, one deal that was due to complete on 23rd December, hit trouble when the buyers announced at completion a desire to drop the purchase price by 15%. When asked why they had decided to do this, they simply said it was because they could! They had chosen the wrong adversary for this tactic. My client had been previously briefed, and we all folded our papers and walked from the room without a word.

Action

1 Get the best adviser you can. Their having industry experience is not relevant. What is important is they understand your deal size and your family. You must like them, you are going to be spending a lot of time with them and you must listen to their advice. They have probably seen this a hundred times before. You need someone who will fight your corner and come out with a good and fair deal. This is particularly important if you have to work an earn-out to get the cash value you need. They wil need to be the bad cop to your good one.

It was nearly 3 in the morning, and we were chased to the car park by the buyers, who insisted on knowing what we were doing. We all left and had a very poor Christmas. When January came, the deal was back on and completed. My clients' fortitude and gave them the confidence to stand firm!

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how to make (and keep) friends! #TheBestYou When we are little kids, we never seemed to have problems making friends. And while we still remember how important friendship is as we grow older, we tend to forget how to find new ones and retain the ones we already have. Here are some tips from The Best You to do just that ...

How to Make Friends 

Seems obvious but, stop watching Tv, turn off the computer and GO OUT.

Spend more time around people. If you want to make friends, you first need to put yourself out there somehow in order to meet people.

Join an organization or club with people who have common interests.

How to Keep Friends 

First thing is make time. You can’t make or have friends without time. You won’t regret the time you spend at work or cooking or cleaning but you will regret not spending time with you friends. Interact – Call – Meet. Text messaging or Skype (unless your friend lives overseas doesn’t really count).

Laugh. People want to be around funny people, don’t take life too seriously.

Have a positive attitude. All people want to be friends with people who can make life bearable not the opposite.

Talk to people. You can join a club, go to school, or go to church but you still won’t make friends if you don’t actually talk to people.

Be fun. Friendship is mainly about having fun, relaxing and taking it easy.

Be a good listener. It’s not necessarily about being very interesting. It’s more important to show that you care, that you’re interested in others.

  

Know the right time to do things.

 

Make eye contact and smile. If you have an unfriendly face, people are less likely to be receptive to your friendship. Give a compliment. Everyone loves an ego boost. Noticing something you like about someone and sharing it with him or her is a great way to forge a connection and start a conversation. Make small talk. Keep the conversation light and cheery.

 Know Me, Like Me, Follow Me Explaining in a down-to-earth, practical way how the modern business landscape is being shaped. 48 w w w.thebestyou.co

Marlene Dietrich

Muhammad Ali "Am I not destroying my enemies when make friends of them?"

I

Abraham Lincoln "Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light."

Be present in difficult times when your friends need you be there. Be a good friend!

"It's the friends you can call up at 4 a.m. that matter."

"Friendship... is not something you learn in school. But if you haven't learned the meaning of friendship, you really haven't learned anything."

Be loyal, kind but truthful and reliable.

recommended reading rohan Weerasinghe turning Point: a 6 step Process for transforming your life

FRIENDSHIP QUOTES

Helen Keller

The Best You website is packed with loads of great books, DvDs, CDs, downloads, free articles and reports. Check it out at: www.thebestyou.co

rM cole storytime

deepak chopra on My Way to a happy life

 This book will give you all the tools to fire children's imaginations and create a life-long connection.

 Based on his bestseller for adults, The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success.


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Feel & look good

Feeling good about yourself makes the joy shine from your eyes and your skin. It makes others respond to you in new ways, and it gives you a whole new outlook on life. Looking good draws others to you and enhances your lives in ways you haven't yet imagined. It's great to find new ways to feel and look good now!

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Chocolate - Can it really keep you feeling and looking good? The Best You looks at the history of chocolate

Spring is in the Air

Nicky Hambleton-Jones on freshening up for spring!

Good food to make you smile The Best You helps you decide what food is the best for your smile

Tell us your inspirational story

Inspire others with your personal story of change. Email us at info@thebestgroupinternational.co.uk


FEEL & LOOK GOOD: the best you

#TheBestYou

- can it really keep you feeling and looking good? Chocolate is one of those products that can cause deep cravings for some, and great pleasure for others. An ancient food, its roots stretch far back in time and it wasn't always the sweet confection we think of today.

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A long-term study in Germany found that about a square of dark chocolate a day lowered blood pressure and reduced risk of stroke by 39 percent. The is down to the presence of flavonoids, that keep the arteries supple. A brief history of chocolate • Chocolate was first eaten around 2,000 years ago in Central America. The Mayans regarded the cacao or cocoa bean as the food of the Gods, and as such used it in ceremonies and even to pay taxes. • The Aztecs mixed the cocoa bean with water, cornmeal, spices and even chilli, to make a bitter spiced drink. Some people say that the ancient word "Xocolatl" means "bitter water". • The cocoa bean was first brought to Europe in 1528 by Hernan Cortes, who presented it to the Spanish King, Charles v. • Cortes inspired Spaniards to mix the bitter drink with sugar, creating a new sweet chocolate drink. The Spaniards added sugar, vanilla, nutmeg, cloves, allspice and cinnamon to create an exclusive and fashionable drink that was the reserve of the Spanish nobility for almost 100 years. • In France in the 18th Century chocolate was considered an aphrodisiac. It was first mixed with candy in Paris, and first included in a cake in London. • J S Fry and Sons made the first solid eating chocolate in 1830. Fry's also made the world's first commercially produced Easter egg in 1873. • Milk chocolate was finally successfully developed in 1875. • Chocolate went on to become a massive industry. 17,000 Belgians are now employed in the chocolate-making industry.

Chocolate and health • Chocolate has a mild anti-depressant effect on the brain by increasing serotonin and endorphin levels. It has a small amount of caffeine that emulates a mild amphetamine. • Cocoa butter is used to make cosmetics and massage oils. Because it melts just below body temperature, it is perfect as a foundation for moisturising creams. • Although it is high in fat content, chocolate doesn't raise blood cholesterol levels. • New research shows that women who eat one or two servings of dark chocolate each week cut their risk for heart failure by as much as a third. • A long-term study in Germany found that about a square of dark chocolate a day lowered blood pressure and reduced risk of stroke by 39 percent. The is down to the presence of flavonoids, that keep the arteries supple. • There are five times more flavonoids in a chocolate bar than an apple. • The high level of sugar and milk in chocolate means that you still have to exercise - otherwise you'll lose control of your weight! • Women who ate chocolate daily during their pregnancy reported that they were better able to handle stress than mothersto-be who abstained. • Researchers from Oxford University and Norway found that those who consumed flavanol-rich chocolate, wine, or tea scored significantly higher on cognitive tests than those who didn't. Funny to say it seems that chocolate holds some keys that will help keep you feeling and looking good. But remember - everything in moderation!

Clair Mason from West yorkshire, uK

IT'S NEVER TOO LATE In 2003, I was 28 and had been slowly dying all my life. I was bullied at school, been fat since 4, suffered with anxiety, panic, eating disorders and had always had the deepest and most intense loathing for myself that i had ever felt for anyone or anything. I was absolutely at rock bottom and had reached 21 1/2 stones. I had to lose over half my weight to get into my official 'normal' weight range. How could such a high achiever get into such a desperate place? It was all too much and unachievable. In July 2003, my grandad was dying and without judgement he said to me 'it's not too late' I remember having a dream where the mantra 'Every mouthful matters, every footstep matters' came to me and something in my head shifted, even a stone off would be better than none eh? I started on my path, hypnotherapy, juicing, working on myself. I’ve been 9 years on my journey (which included weddings, deaths, separation and a breakdown) I find things that work and adopt them into my life. Last year I discovered EFT which released me, I also had my tummy tuck (not because I hated my body, I wanted to meet the body I was now.) This year I discovered Paleo which has been a miracle for my physical/mental health (the list is amazing.) My body is scarred and ravaged by my past but at 37 I feel like I am now playing my second half. This year I trained with Kevin Laye in Hypnotherapy and TFT a new direction for a new me. I am 3lbs off losing 10 stone and am currently training hard for tough mudder! Am I mad? Maybe? But I am excited, content, curious, playful and I am ME.

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FEEL & LOOK GOOD: nIcKy haMbleton-Jones

Spring clean your wardrobe with expert beauty and style tips from The Make-Over Queen, Nicky Hambleton-Jones

nicky Hambleton-Jones Nicky Hambleton-Jones is at the forefront of the fashion and beauty industries, making it her business to find the best solutions to help women look and feel younger.

With Spring in the air, it is the perfect time to refresh your wardrobe and regime, taking inspiration from others and polishing off your look for the new season. Just a few subtle changes can sometimes be all it takes to transform your look and make it new-seasonappropriate in an instant.

Style Switch-up Much of the time we can feel stuck in a rut when it comes to our fashion sense, especially as the new season takes hold and our clothes become outdated and weather-inappropriate. The best inspiration for switching up your style comes from those around you, so take time to look at friends and colleagues’ styles and pick out your favourite details. For example, you may know someone who wears colour all the time which you yourself can find a bit daunting. So just try to inject subtle colourful pieces into your outfits to brighten them up. Coloured accessories can look fabulous when used to add a flash of colour to an otherwise neutral look. I love these blue jewelled earrings from ASOS, £6.


is in the air! Or if you’re feeling a little more daring try a bright coloured blazer like this one from Mango, £34.99. If you’re struggling to switch up your own style and lacking inspiration, then help is at hand. My team of London Personal Stylists are hosting the ‘NHJ Style in the City' Fashion Event for Spring Summer 2013 where they will talk you through the fashion trends for the spring summer season for women. There will be a live model demonstration to give you plenty of style tips and practical advice on what will work for your body shape so you will know where and how to shop for the season. So whether you feel stuck in a style rut, need a self-esteem boost, want to dress to impress in a new or current job - or are simply looking for some inspiration, our team of expert personal stylists will be on hand to offer stylish ideas that will work for your body shape, budget and lifestyle. For more information on the event, head over to www.NHJStyle.com.

#TheBestYou

Fresh Faced Adjusting your make-up to the changing season can make just as big an impact as adjusting your style. The best way to refresh your regime is to focus on looking radiant and the best way to do this is by switching up your foundation. Try to pick a foundation that is aimed towards giving your skin a dewy complexion. Nars Sheer Glow Foundation, £30.50, is a great choice as it has a brightening formula, leaving the skin hydrated and more luminous. Less is more when it comes to everyday Spring lip colours. Look for a hydrating lip gloss that will give a sheer tint of colour to the lips to avoid looking overdone. The Clarins Instant Light Natural Lip Perfector, £17 is perfect as it moisturises whilst giving a fresh and natural sheen to the lips.

For more information about Nicky Hambleton-Jones, her personal styling services and the Style in the City event please visit : www.nhjstyle.com

recommended reading

The Best You website is packed with loads of great books, DvDs, CDs, downloads, free articles and reports. Check it out at: www.thebestyou.co

Paul Mckenna the hypnotic gastric Band

Brian tracy the Power of self-confidence

Marisa Peer Forever young

 A psychological way that can help to convince your mind that a gastric band has been fitted.

 Brian Tracy shares the so that you can live the greatest life.

 The revolutionary programme that will make you look and feel 10 years younger in just 10 days.

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good food to make you smile #TheBestYou

The Best You helps you decide what food is the best for your smile!

Top Five Tooth Friendly Foods! Cheese! As you’re tucking into a chunk of cheddar you’ll be pleased to know that not only is it rich in calcium, which promotes healthy teeth, it also balances out the PH in your mouth which lessens the damaging effects of acid from a festive glass of wine on tooth enamel and helps kill bacteria that cause tooth decay and gum disease.

When snacking, instead of opting for crisps, why not opt for nuts instead? Peanuts (unsalted if possible) contain calcium and vitamin D, both vital for oral health as well as your general health. Broccoli and carrots are great for your oral health as they contain vitamin A which help strengthens the tooth enamel. Crudités promote good oral health as, because they are eaten raw, they massage your gums, which encourage blood flow, and clean your teeth too! Turkey provides us with a great source of protein, which is rich in phosphorus. This combines with calcium and vitamin D to make our teeth (and bones). By eating plenty of protein you will help reduce tooth decay and keep your teeth strong and healthy.

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Top Five Teeth Rotters: Sweets, biscuits and cakes – Although the endless supply of chocolate and puddings it so tempting, try to keep them to a minimum as sugars are a prime cause of the acidic biofilm which causes dental decay. Acid resulting from frequent consumption of refined sugar dissolves the minerals essential for healthy teeth. When you do indulge, its best to have sweets in one go, rather than picking throughout the day. Wine – We all love a glass of wine or two at Christmas, but white wine can be very acidic and contribute to enamel erosion, try drinking it just at your main meal, as drinking little and often is far worse than drinking once a day. Red wine can also increase the risk of staining, especially if you forget to brush your teeth as often as you should with the distractions of festive fun! If you are drinking red wine, try to remember to leave a gap before you brush your teeth to remove any stains.

Processed cereals – Breakfast may not be the most important meal when it comes to the festive season, but if you’re looking to grab something quick and easy to set you up for the day try to avoid processed cereals as you’ll be amazed at how much sugar is hidden in these, much better to opt for porridge or bran based cereals – or, better still eggs! Crisps - Cooked starch breaks down into component sugars – the main enemy for teeth. Why not opt for carbs low on the glycaemic index such as vegetable crisps instead?

Fizzy drinks – If you like a bit of fizz in your soft drinks or mixers why not opt for soda water. Fizzy drinks are loaded with sugar and even sugar-free or diet drinks are still acidic and in excess can cause tooth enamel to erode away. But, if you can’t resist them, use a straw to lessen direct contact with your teeth.


THE BEST

Wealth & Riches

YOU

Life Without Limits

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Wealth [n] "happiness," also "prosperity in abundance of possessions or riches" from Middle English "wele", meaning "well-being". Riches [n] "valued possessions, money, property," Making money and bringing greater wealth to EVERY area of your life...

Shine at that Interview!

We ask eight business leaders to their advice for job seekers

The Missing Element to the Law Tasmen Garrie says success doesn't just happen, you must act!

The Business of Self Help

Peter Hoppenfeld has spent many years advising the big names of personal development

Tell us your inspirational story

Inspire others with your personal story of change. Email us at info@thebestgroupinternational.co


WEALTH & RICHES:THE BEST YOU

The Best You continues its series of articles to help job seekers get their best start at a career Best You asked 8 business leaders what advice they would give to someone looking for a job. Here's what they told us:

shine at that interview!

Jo Haigh - partner in fds Corporate Finance

"Understand what we do. There is no reason for you to not be prepared - Google will tell you all. Understand the market we operate in and where it's going." “Come dressed for the job you want. Ask sensible and intelligent questions and tell me what you can do for me and my company. “Listen to what I have to tell you." “Bring a Cv that explains how you have achieved things, not a list of qualifications." “Bring a great idea to me. Show innovation and initiative" www.fds-group.uk.com

John Davy Serial Entrepreneur

“Quite simply, I want you to... be original, be bold and show a passion for the job you are applying for. It is also important to show proof of past exploits.” www.jongleurs.com

Peter Shrimpton - Director of Randstad Sales and Retail

“Be clear about your personal and business goals. We like people who are clear on their desired outcome ‘inside and outside’ of work “Be prepared to ask intelligent and open questions about working with us in the interview. Quality questions are far more impressive to us than dominating the talking – especially about yourself! Your language in your questions show how expert you are in your field. “Be clear on your Cv about your key achievements – know your dates and numbers. “Take responsibility for where you are in life so far.”

Nigel Henry, co-owner of Fusion Residential

“Research what we do, how we do it, what we're great at and what you think is missing in our business. When in an interview, confidence is great, just don't overdo it. Dress to impress and ask 'good' questions." “Our business is world class. Prove you are. Have a great Cv, not just good grades." “You have a limited amount of time to make an impression, use it wisely. “ www.fusionresidential.co.uk


Adrian Reynard - Founder of Reynard Racing Cars

“Start with a firm handshake and look your interviewer in the eye. Motor sport is about persistence, determination and a solid character. You need to show these qualities at interview. “Focus your CV or discussions on what THIS job is about and what the company will want you to do. Don’t harp on about all the hard work you put in to a bar job, as a van driver or non-related task. “Know the company's history, roots, aspirations, ambitions, Team Owners, Team goals for 2012 and beyond, maybe the state of their finances!. Try to understand their departmental structure to identify alternate openings you could consider. “And when you stand up to leave, and look them in the eye and offer your hand for a reminder firm handshake, tell them something for them to remember you by!” www.adrianreynard.com

Frank Bastow, CEO of Bastows, property restoration and redecoration company

Jason Petsch Comercial Director Winter Risk Management "Be on time and do your homework on the business and what we stand for. "First impressions count. We believe our culture is a fundamental ingredient to our current and long-term success and are looking for first impressions and can do attitude. I am personally going to pay more attention to how an interviewee presents themselves and what value I think they could bring to the rest of the team before any real attention is given to previous experience. "Another little quirk for me: clean shoes, if you can’t be bothered to clean your shoes then what does that say about you?" www.gritit.com

Simon Lester, Chairman of Lester Hotels

"Be on time, be ready and have clean shoes. Be the best you possible. Tell the truth - no great relationship was ever built on a lie. "

“Research the company properly. Understand their values and what they are trying to achieve rather than just what they have achieved so far."

"Trust in your own ability. You have a value - let it shine and be confident in it." www.bastows.co.uk

“Then demonstrate how you would add value to the organisation and highlight where your ambitions are aligned. Be very clear about what you have to offer and be confident in your ability to deliver!” www.lesterhotels.com

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WEALTH & RICHES: tasMan garrIe

the missing element to the law of attraction Tamsen Garrie Tamsen Garrie is the leading authority on ‘Attraction’ in Business.

Success just doesn’t happen, it requires you to act to attract it!

H

ave you ever wondered why it is that some people appear to create success in their lives with ease whilst others appear destined to struggle? The answer lies in ‘Attraction’.

Attraction is working for you right now. That’s right - you are already attracting into your life people, events and circumstances - whether you’re attracting the ones you want or not is another matter! You may already have an understanding of ‘attraction’ in the pursuit of success as a result of knowing about the universal Law of Attraction. This law is said to determine the order of the universe and our lives based on the principle ‘like attracts like’. It states that when we experience thoughts and feelings, we send an equivalent energy frequency out into the universe and that the universe responds by sending back to us 58 w w w.thebestyou.co

events and circumstances that are on that same frequency. So, for example, if you have angry thoughts and subsequently feel angry, then an angry frequency is emitted and you attract events and circumstances that cause you to feel more anger. Conversely, if your thoughts are positive and your feelings are ones of happiness, you attract back positive, happy events and circumstances. Now, if you buy-into the basic premise that perception is reality, then this is easy to accept. However, The Law of Attraction also claims that desirable outcomes such as health and wealth are attracted into our lives through the way we think and feel, and that by simply changing the way we think and feel we can change our lives. That we simply need to be clear about what we want, visualise it and ask for it, believe that we deserve it and have faith that we will receive it, give thanks for it as if it has already happened, and it will miraculously manifest.

“It is not enough to strongly desire something, and to believe you deserve it. You have to actually ‘do’ something too. “


#TheBestYou

Now, whilst I have personally worked with The Law of Attraction for many years and whilst I have experienced successes which can be attributed in many ways to the way I think and feel, the most significant success I have experienced in my life has come as a result of combining these principles with specific action. It is not enough to strongly desire something, and to believe you deserve it. You have to actually ‘do’ something too. There is a reason why the word Attraction contains the word Action, and that’s because our success is influenced greatly by our activity, that’s both our internal activity, so our desires, beliefs, thoughts and feelings, AND our external activity, so, our language, behaviour and actions.This is what I call The Act Of Attraction. The Act Of Attraction is based on the words embedded within the word ATTRACTION: ATTRACT > ACTION > TRACTION. All three

words contain the word ‘Act’ and the word ‘Act’ also sits at the centre of the word ‘Attraction’, so it’s pretty fundamental to the process.

feelings are aligned with what you’re actually doing. Traction often manifests as a ‘feeling’ or a ‘sensation’ before it manifests as a tangible outcome:

ATTRACT is your internal activity. It is about what you want, what you believe, what you think and what you feel and because it’s what drives your motivation, it is therefore the basis from which everything else stems.

All of our actions start to impact in all areas and we begin to feel like we are progressing forwards effortlessly. As a result, we experience a gentle ‘draw’ as opposed to the forced ‘push’ that is so often associated with effort.

ACTION is your external activity. It’s about the actions you take that other people notice and the perception that creates. It’s what you say and do and it’s the intentional steps you take towards a specific goal. TRACTION is the cumulative effect of ATTRACT and ACTION. Traction is defined in the dictionary as adhesion and unforced forward movement and it’s what happens when your desires, beliefs, thoughts and

recommended reading

When you have your internal and external activity working together in tandem, you can’t help but succeed – what other possible outcome is there? To find out more about The Act Of Attraction, you can download a FREE sample of the book The Act Of Attraction In Business here: www. tamsengarrie.biz

The Best You website is packed with loads of great books, DvDs, CDs, downloads, free articles and reports. Check it out at www.thebestyou.co

Jack canfield tapping in to ultimate success

vince lombardi What it takes to be #1

emma Murray doing Business the alan sugar Way

 What if the struggles you were having simply melted away?

 This is the first step-bystep guide on how anyone can develop Lombardi-like leadership skills

 The 10 Secrets of the Boardroom's Toughest Interviewer

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WEALTH & RICHES: the best you

the Business of self Help The Best You talks to Peter Hoppenfeld, the New York-based advisor to some of the biggest names in personal development

P

eter Hoppenfeld occupies a unique place in the world of Personal Development.

The 55-year-old New Yorker is an expert in marketing strategy, legal skills and distribution. He straddles the interface between the "guru" on the one side, and the "brand" on the other. He is a seasoned strategist, advisor and transactional, commercial attorney with direct marketing, distribution, franchising, licensing, marketing, branding and operational expertise. He has been involved in the Personal Development world for many years, and has worked with some of the most successful and life-changing personalities of the last half century, including T Harv Eker. Greatly successful in his own right, he has a clear idea of what it is that will help a business to work well, and how to promote his clients. At the same time, his own business philosophy is simple. To show great respect for the people he works with and also to remain detached from their ideas and

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philosophies to ensure that the services and products they offer are absolutely right for the customer. This involves, as he puts it, "not drinking the Kool Aid." Not because the skills the gurus offer don't work, but because being the outside observer means he can give advice that will ensure that the strategies of the trainers he works with work better. To have such longevity in his business, Peter has consistently kept up with the trends, updating his knowledge of technology along the way, and adding expertise in new media advertising and social networking as it came along. Back when he started, companies made copies of documents with carbon paper and faxes were new on the scene. "But," he says, "the basic marketing principles maintaining a common thread from beginning to end, even though the method of delivery has changed." Peter got into the Personal Development world after working in the newly-emerging


#TheBestYou

Peter Hoppenfeld has worked with personal development giants including ...

BARBARA DE ANGELIS

BRENDON BURCHARD

franchise sector. Through networking that he came to direct marketing, which he calls the "soft underbelly" of marketing. "There are billions of dollars in the world of direct marketing, which has nothing to do with placing an advertisement on the TV or in the newspapers." He says it's quite an art, and "it's something the players in Wall Street know nothing about." His first large contact with self help came way back in the 1980s with Charles J Givens, who was the major financial guru in the US at the time. He was running seminars, he had a multi-level marketing operation, a membership club, a monthly newsletter, TV appearances, infomercials, bestselling books. It was the ultimate way to see how it all worked. Peter also saw how it didn't work, when Givens also became embroiled in scandal - an insight and experience that he brings to his clients to this day. Peter sees his role as that of honest voice to his clients. He is a smart, detached observer who maintains a professional distance that enables him to give the best advice on a number of subjects, unclouded by his clients' reputations. It is a great lesson for anyone working in the business, and it is this that has given him his staying power. He is focussed on depersonalising his view

CHARLES J GIVENS

of the business, understanding that many of the people he works with are also brands that have to be managed in this way. At the same time, when he works with them, he sees them not as "rock stars" as many of their clients see them, but as mothers, fathers, daughters and sons. "They are people with foibles and their own approach to the world. I never get stars in my eyes. I let the people I work with know exactly how I see them, and give them the best advice for the both them and the brand they represent. I try to understand the client's risk tolerance, too." The advice he has to give to someone setting up in the Personal Development business, he says: "You can't appoint yourself a thought leadrer. The idea that everyone is an expert and can sell their expertise is wrong. You really have to passionate about what you do and you need to have something of value to bring to the table. If you have that and it's well developed and you've given it some thought, that's a great starting point. But to think you are an expert in something when you haven't accomplished it yourself - that just doesn't work." So, what drives Peter? His answer: "To aspire to greatness. To do the best you can do, and not to settle for average." "I've always said, give me a 9 on the give a sh** scale." He tells me. "It's vital to care, and to engage."

T HARV EKER

“There are billions of dollars in the world of direct marketing, which has nothing to do with placing an advert on the TV or in the newspapers� If there is one piece of the Kool Aid that he has drunk, then, he admits, it is T Harv Eker's piece of advice: "How you do anything is how you do everything." It's this attitude that makes him one of the best. b

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WEALTH & RICHES: the rocKy roaD to success

Cecilia Payne-Gaposchkin

Bill Gates

Curiosity and Analysis

Competitive and Precise.

Not a household name, Cecilia Payne-Gaposchkin is one of the unsung heroes of 20th century science. Born in Wendover, England, as Cecilia Payne, her father died when she was just four years old, forcing her mother to raise the family alone. With her mother deciding to spend no money on her higher education, Cecilia won a scholarship to Cambridge University, where she discovered a lifelong love of astronomy. Here, she completed her studies but did not receive a degree because she was a woman. For this reason, Cecilia left Britain to study astronomy at Harvard. In 1925, her dissertation on the chemical constitution of the stars was described as "undoubtedly the most brilliant Ph.D. thesis ever written in astronomy". She observed that the sun must comprise a million times more hydrogen than believed, and vastly more helium. Dissuaded from publishing this by her tutor, Henry Norris Russell, her contribution to astronomy remained unrecognised, especially after Russell published the same findings himself four years later. Nevertheless, Payne continued at the cutting edge of science. Her observations and analysis of variable stars laid the basis for all subsequent work on them. She was the first woman ever to be made a full professor by Harvard University and is an unrecognised genius of science.

Born in 1955, the founder of software giant Microsoft has a staggering personal fortune estimated at around US $65 billion. His world influence is difficult to overstate. As a teenager, Gates first programmed a computer to play tic-tac-toe, then exploited bugs in his school computers to allow him more computing time. Banned from computing at age 14, he offered to find other bugs in the software, studying code at the computer company offices. Gates went to Harvard but dropped out to form Microsoft at just 21 years of age. In his first five years of business, Gates' dedication to detail saw him personally review every line of code written in Microsoft, often changing it. He aggressively broadened Microsoft's range, becoming known for toughness and competitiveness. One executive recalls that after beating Gates at a videogame 35 out of 37 times, the next time they met Gates "won or tied every game. He had studied the game until he solved it. That is a competitor." However, as his wealth grew, Gates began to find moral purpose in his work. He now organises numerous charities through his Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation, offering free information to encourage graduates to deal with the "hard questions" of existence. Always a competitor, some of his charity projects have been criticised for their desire to make a return that can then be used for new projects. Nevertheless, alongside Warren Buffet, he has pledged to give away 95% of his wealth. Bill Gates now is a far remove from a teenaged computer hacker, and shows just how unexpected the twists and turns of life can be.

— Cecilia Payne-Gaposchkin's natural brilliance could not be dimmed by the conventions of a society still agonising over whether to give women the vote. She remains a brilliant role model for everyone who has struggled against societal expectations just to be themselves. Bernardo Moya

Our virtues and our failings are inseparable, like force and matter. When they separate, man is no more. 62 w w w.thebestyou.co

— The choices Bill Gates made and the way he saw and seized his opportunities are inspirational - as is his commitment to doing good works! Bernardo Moya

"Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one."


the rocky road to success #TheBestYou

Traits you'll need on the way Bernardo Moya Who are your heroes? @Bernardo_Moya

Soichiro Honda

Billie Jean King

The Japanese Henry Ford

Flair and Determination

The son of a blacksmith born in Shizuoka, Japan in 1906, Soichiro Honda spent his early years with his father repairing bicycles. He had little interest in school, forging his father's family stamp to show receipt of school reports. However, he was curious about engineering and his love of invention was born on seeing an airplane demonstration. Working first as a car mechanic in Tokyo from the age of 16, in 1928 he returned to run his own car repair business. The big change in his life came post-war. In 1946 he found he could fit bicycles with a small generator engine designed to power army radios. He sold 1500 powered bikes, and in 1948 began producing motorcycles. In the following decades, Honda turned his company into a billion-dollar multinational. His engineering and marketing skills resulted in Honda motorcycles outselling Triumph and HarleyDavidson in their home markets. Honda remained president until retirement in 1973, when he stayed on as director and "supreme adviser". His status was such that People magazine dubbed him "the Japanese Henry Ford." Even in old age, Soichiro held a private pilot's license, enjoyed skiing, hang-gliding and ballooning, and was a highly accomplished artist.

Born Billie Jean Moffitt in Long Beach, California in 1943, Billie Jean King was a fireman's daughter in a conservative Methodist family. With no financial advantages, she learned to play tennis on public courts not far from home, augmenting her natural talent with rigid discipline. In 1962 at the tender age of 19, Billie Jean shot to stardom at the world's most prestigious tennis tournament, Wimbledon. At her first attempt, she won the women's doubles title at alongside Karen Hantze Susman. It was the start of an extraordinary career. Between 1961 and 1979, Billie Jean King won a record 20 Wimbledon titles, including the singles in 1966–8, 1972–3, and 1975. She also won 13 US titles (including four singles), four French titles (one singles), and two Australian titles (one singles). Augmenting her sporting prowess was her sense of justice, which prompted her to demand equal prize money for women. Older tennis champ Bobby Riggs criticised her, saying the women's game was inferior to the men's, and that even he at 55 years old could beat the best women in the game. When Billie Jean was challenged by Riggs and offered $100,000 to play, she accepted. The hugely billed "Battle Of The Sexes" in 1973 saw her vanquish Riggs, though she drew no pleasure from beating an older man. Fearless in her personal life, too, she revealed that she was gay at a time when attitudes to homosexuality were far more entrenched than today. Her effect on the players who followed on from her has been as a massive inspirational figure.

He was an innovator, and unique in his home country - driven by his passion for invention.

Honda was considered rude and abrupt by members of the Japanese establishment, and so it wasn't only his own lack of schooling and lowly position he had to combat - but the prejud ice of the society he lived in. He overcame it all to become a massively impressive entrepreneur. Bernardo Moya

Success represents the 1% of your work which results from the 99% that is called failure.

Her determination, her sense of justice and her willingness to stick her head above the parapet makes Billie Jean King an impressive force. She continues to champion the cause of tennis to this day, and is one of the all time greats of the game male or female! Bernardo Moya

“A champion is afraid of losing. Everyone else is afraid of winning.” – Billie Jean King w w w.thebestyou.co 63


WEALTH & RICHES: t. harV eKer

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THE BEST

YOU

21st century lIVIng

The pace of change can sometimes bewilder - but also gives amazing opportunities to meet new people, discover new things and thrive. Bring out the best in you by discovering the latest innovations that will put you ahead of the pack.

Life Without Limits

TM

how to create effective social Media arthur Partridge show you how to make your social media work

apple vs android

Matt wingett looks at brand semantics in the app war

Tell us your inspiraTional sTory

inspire others with your personal story of change. email us at info@thebestgroupinternational.co


21ST CENTURY LIvING: arthur PartrDIge

how to create effective social Media for increased awareness, clients and influence arthur partridge Arthur Partridge, from Launch Pad Social Media shows you how to make your social media work for you. Establishing an effective social media presence is becoming more and more important in this rapidly changing world. We have seen a marked shift away from traditional forms of advertising and a migration toward platforms which have the ability to instantly communicate with our audience. So just how can someone relatively new or confused by social media take concrete steps in making an impact in their market? We have put together a few simple tips to help you along the way.

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1. The purpose of social media is to be social. Social media is a way to engage with your audience and prospective clients and customers. Whichever platforms you use, or intend to use, remember that being interesting is of more value than being dull and irrelevant to your market.

2. The biggest mistake is to sell. Unfortunately, many new comers to social media make the fundamental and common mistake of going direct to sale, believing that their new audience will rush forth with credit cards waving in the air. This is rarely the truth. The old axiom of know, like and trust is the basis for success on social media. This is why an ‘overnight success’ plan does not really work. Posting valuable, interesting and engaging content should be built into a mid to long term plan.

Remember that being interesting is of more value than being dull and irrelevant to your market.

3. Learn to write effectively. If you want to really engage with your audience it will be important to consider your skills as a writer and communicator. Experience has demonstrated that for many busy people engaging writing is not a natural skill. If this is so with you, then you will either have to work on your own skills or find someone else more skilled to do so. As we say, writers write. Most posts which we see (estimated at 80%) are plain and boring. There tends to be a lack of powerful verbs and subtle calls to action, and these are things we can learn by studying great copy and other posts we have previously liked. Quality time spent on writing and copy skills will pay handsomely over time when it comes to increasing the readership, engagement and success of your business. Launchpadsocialmedia.com are a social media management business designed to assist small to medium sized ventures with effective strategy, assistance and copywriting services. To discover more go to:

www.Launchpadsocialmedia.com

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21ST CENTURY LIvING: Matt wIngett

apple vs android Brand semantics and what the future holds in the app store... Matt Wingett There's no doubt about it, Apple is going to be around for a long time. With its dedicated band of followers and its reputation for great design, it is the product of choice for hundreds of millions of people around the world. But, asks Matt Wingett, will its massive profitability continue unabated, or are the cracks already starting to appear thanks to that cheeky young upstart, Android?

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For those who suffer this Jobsian nostalgia, it must come as a shock to read about Apple's aggressive corporate stance in trying to stamp out rivals throughout the world. For a company that once had its adherents describing Microsoft as "The Evil Empire", that is quite a journey to have come.

Actually, it's difficult to get a real, detached view on the matter, partially because Apple users appear to have subscribed as much to a cult as to a technical gadget. That probably stems from the legendary start of the Apple project. After, all, how can you not feel a sense of frisson when thinking about the LSD-taking University drop-out who ran a computer factory from his garage while talking Zen Buddhism and incorporating its ethos into his design?

And that's where Android comes in. Comparisons between the two systems are fascinating in that they reveal both a similarity of roots and a vast divergence of attitude.

et's be clear about this. People who sing the demise of Apple are either seriously deluded or have a hidden agenda.

But that doesn't mean that Apple's position in the market is always going to be as powerful as it is today. After all, while there are plenty of tech commentators telling us that the latest fruity iOS with its cleverly named iMac, iPad, iPhone and iWhatever-Else-Apple-Can-Think-Of as hardware have "dominance" over this market or that, there are plenty of others warning that Android is stealing a march on the old venerable Apple.

There's a legacy of the counter-culture - a kind of feeling that something is not only superbly designed, but somehow cocks a snook at the establishment.

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But of course, we've moved on a long way from those Jobsian days. Apple nowadays has a reputation for solidity, reliability and extremely highly tested apps and hardware. As a friend said to me recently, "the reason I buy Apple is that it does what other Smartphone, computers and tablets do, it just does it better. It's the Rolls Royce of the tech world."

Apple, after all, is nothing if not clever about its image. The forbidden fruit that gives you knowledge, is good for you, is simple and wholesome and has all that childhood positivity attached to it (an apple a day keeps the doctor away, an apple for the teacher, the apple of my eye, the Big Apple) is a fantastic brand.


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ndroid, on the other hand, appears deliberately to have gone down the opposite route. Its OS releases are called "cupcake" and "jellybean", and are all about something sweet that you just can't resist. It may not be as wholesome as an Apple, but you'll get a rush from it and probably won't go to bed for a week on the high from all those food additives. There is something quite "upstart" about this OS. After all, it is based on the Open Source software known as Linux, meaning that it is immediately changeable by any programmer who wants to get in there and fiddle around. You want to change the software, you can do it unlike the locked Apple OS. Sure, that's democratic and it's collegiate. It also means that you don't get the rigorous checks on the system that you do on Apple software, meaning there is danger of malicious code creeping on to your phone. But, it also means it has that strange cachet of being more democratic - of not telling you how you should organise your software, and for some that is a great positive. Sure, it's got Google behind it, but in its early days when Andy Rubin, one of its founders, was down to his last few bucks, a friend bailed him out with an envelope of cash, no strings attached. This is the stuff of legend that tells a story that is very different from that of the most profitable corporation in the world, Apple.

eventually the way they buy. Apple is a Rolls Royce system. It makes massive profits on each unit it sells. It offers high quality, highly tested apps from its store and takes a long time ensuring that its products are safe. For many, they wouldn't sully themselves with anything less. That is brand loyalty at its best. By the same token, it slows and stifles innovation, and for many is simply unaffordable. That's where Android has started to win. Used in numerous different makes of phone, it can be bought cheaply or expensively. You can have your Rolls Royce experience or your Ford Fiesta spin about town. You can get hold of one that does what you want, and when you want to replace it or drop it down the toilet, you aren't looking at the back end of hundreds of dollars or pounds when you do. To me, the current state of things reminds me of something from way, way back when these two systems weren't even a twinkle in their creators' eyes. Betamax video recorders were no doubt the superior system. But in the end, it was vHS that won through with aggressive pricing. I don't believe the Apple will ever disappear like Betamax did. But it wouldn't surprise me if it became the preserve of the rich man, the stylist... and dare I say it... the nerd?

Why do I look at the semantics and the myth behind these two systems? Because I believe myth shapes the way people think, and

To me, the current state of things reminds me of something from way, way back when these two systems weren't even a twinkle in their creators' eyes. Betamax Video recorders were no doubt the superior system. But in the end, it was VHS that won through with aggressive pricing.

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we support

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The Best You backs worthy causes that help our community

Fresh out of university in 1975, Lois Lee became a central figure in the hunt for a pair of murderers known as the Hillside Stranglers, who would torture and strangle prostitutes. Because of work she had been doing with prostitutes' rights, she got a tip-off that another murder was being committed. The police, who were part of what she described as the "old boy network" were not interested in news about another "whore" as they put it. But when the body of a 17-year-old girl was found, Lee took it on herself to mobilise the media and members of the sex trade and criminal underworld to help track down the murderers. It sounds like the stuff of a Hollywood movie, but this story really happened. It was the starting point for Lois Lee's involvement with a life-long project to protect children from entering the sex trade. Later, dealing with organising testimony against the Hillside Stranglers, Lee went back into the underworld, where the people in the sex clubs and the pornography business told her, “You’ve got to do something about kids. We’ve got kids in our business. There’s kids all over the place”. The reason was that the US Congress had changed the law so that it was illegal for the police to arrest children for running away, truancy or for curfew. They couldn't bring children into police stations if there was any chance of them coming into contact with an adult offender - so the streets became flooded with kids in 1979. "Over the next three years over 250 children came through my home," Lee says. It was the start of a lifelong fight to save children from the sex trade in the US. Today, Lois Lee estimates that she has saved over 10,000 children from the ravages of prostitution. She achieved this 70 w w w.thebestyou.co


#TheBestYou through setting up her organisation Children of the Night, of which she is President. The organisation was the first social service program to help sex trafficking victims, and it continues to be the most comprehensive anti-sex trafficking program in the world. Children of the Night frequently hosts international policy makers, diplomats, United Nations delegates and social service providers when they visit the Children of the Night home, helping them to learn the lessons of Lois Lee and her team's hardearned experience. Children are educated, given a purpose in life and taken away from the destructive and disruptive exploiters who would use these vulnerable young people to their cynical ends. To find out more about Lois Lee and Children of the Night, visit: www.childrenofthenight.org

DID YOU KNOW:  "Children of the Night is a privately funded non-profit organization established in 1979 and dedicated to rescuing America's children from the ravages of prostitution."

OTHER WORTHY CAUSES WE SUPPORT National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children (NSPCC) www.nspcc.org.uk

Katie Piper Foundation www.katiepiperfoundation.org.uk Teenage Cancer Trust www.teenagecancertrust.org

10millionmetres www.alexfl ynn.co.uk

Sebastian's Action Trust www.sebastiansactiontrust.org

Bosom Buddies UK www.bosombuddiesuk.com Alice's Blog alicepyne.blogspot.co.uk

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